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Hey, everybody. I'm James Duthie.
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Yes, he is, and I'm Chad Bailey,
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the sexy roguish new face
of our parent company's effort
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to rebrand Sports Desk for a new generation.
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Sports Desk - it's not delivery.
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It's Sports Desk.
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Okay. Uh...
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We go live to Reading, Pennsylvania.
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With the Big League officially shut down
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thanks to the lockout,
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all eyes are on the EMHL tonight
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as the Reading Wolfdogs get set
to take on the Halifax...
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Highlanders, this season,
the big show made it to us.
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This lockout means there's gonna
be a whole bunch of big dicks
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swinging their way down to our league.
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Play's gonna get faster,
the hits are gonna get harder,
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crowd's gonna get crowdier.
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You fucking boys are the Light Brigade
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and you're gonna need someone
at the tip of the spear.
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- You need a captain.
- Yeah.
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He's bled blue and orange
for this team a long time.
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That's right.
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He's got that shit that keeps him going
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long after he has any reason to.
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Let's open that up.
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Dougie.
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Time for you to put this fucker on.
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Come on!
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It looks good on you! Alright.
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A C! Whoo!
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Thank you guys so much.
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I've never been a captain before.
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One time, I had a dream
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that I was the captain of a monkey ship.
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There was all these monkeys playing around,
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laughing, having fun, singing,
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wearing little monkey sailor hats...
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...fighting over life jackets.
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Pierce Brosnan was screaming.
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I hope one day I can be
the captain of your dreams.
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Best wishes, Doug Glatt.
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Okay, yeah. Alright, good. Well, we, uh...
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Doug, we didn't make you captain for your speeches.
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We made you captain because...
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Because you leave it all
out there on the fucking ice.
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Ah, this sport is everything to you, right?
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You make me proud to own this team.
48
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I want you all to watch Doug out there tonight.
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Watch him do whatever the fuck it takes
50
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to get us a W.
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That said...
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Come on! Let's get after it, boys!
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- Congrats, bud.
- Thank you, buddy.
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Joining us for tonight's game,
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our own Red McCauley.
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Reading City Council
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spent a bunch of money on a new jumbotron,
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and right now, it's making everything red.
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Go, boys! Go! Let's go!
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I love this fucking game.
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Halifax and Reading.
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Here's LaFlamme dancing with the puck.
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LaFlamme spins. He shoots.
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He hit the post!
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Now it's LaFlamme again!
He's all over the ice.
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Murphy steps into him.
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Oh! Glatt absolutely levels Michael Murphy.
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Sorry, Mikey.
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Glatt's escorted aside by
a couple of Reading Wolfdogs.
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00:04:04,828 --> 00:04:07,748
LaFlamme. Xavi was flattened. That angers Glatt.
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Glatt fires a left. He fires a right.
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Sorry, Mikey!
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They're falling. The Wolfdogs are down.
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- Sorry, Mikey?
- Shut the fuck up, Doug.
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And that is what friends are for,
76
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especially when your friends
are huge Jewish guys
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named Doug Glatt.
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LaFlamme takes the puck.
He moves up the left wing.
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LaFlamme trying to go to the outside
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as the penalties expire.
81
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Both sides at full strength.
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LaFlamme in behind the goal,
takes it into the corner.
83
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He circles, looks in front.
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Awaiting there is Glatt,
but LaFlamme holds on.
85
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Jams it. He scores!
86
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LaFlamme makes it 1-0
for the Halifax Highlanders.
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- Alright.
- Reunited and it feels so good.
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It's a new dawn for the Halifax Highlanders.
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- You're like Captain America!
- Captain America.
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New owner and GM Hyrum Cain's plan
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to win a championship in his first season
92
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starts off with a bang
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as the Highlanders open the scoring.
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Highlanders draw first blood at the buzzer,
95
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but the real story here is the physical play.
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Doug Glatt,
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like a huge Jewish freight train,
doing what he does best.
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His tilt with Ross Rhea still number one
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on the hockeyfights.com All-Time Best List.
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He's already proving to be a difference maker
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for Halifax GM and Highlanders
Hall-of-Famer Hyrum Cain.
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The other story to follow
is Hyrum's son, Anders Cain,
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who's coming off that
career-high season last year:
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80 points.
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Anders now finds himself
up against his own father's team
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in the very first game of the season.
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Anders is the prototypical modern-era tough guy,
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able to drop the gloves
and put up the points as well.
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Anders and Xavier LaFlamme are perfect examples
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of the kind of top-quality talent
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this lockout is already providing the league.
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What a great lockout.
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No-one ever says that.
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I just did, and I'm Chad Bailey. Sports Desk.
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It's sports at a desk, you lunatics.
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Look at this motherfucking desk.
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I wanted to thank my big sis, Eva,
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for organising the fuck out of this.
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If you're gonna get shittered,
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might as well get shittered at my place of work.
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Place of work!
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Place of work! Place of work!
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...just add some cheese in there.
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Oh, shit! There he is! Dougie!
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When it gets to a certain length,
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I just go to the barber
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and he cuts it to the length
that I want him to cut it to.
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- Thank you.
- Attaboy, Dougie!
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But just to summarise, that's a yes
on mandatory neck guards?
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Yes. That's correct. Thank you.
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Okay, now, while we have you here,
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is there anyone back home
you'd like to give a shout-out to?
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Yes, thank you.
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I want to say hi to my one teammate, Eva,
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who couldn't be here tonight.
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She's my teammate that can't be here right now.
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- My wife, Eva.
- Doug with that big dick!
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That's not appropriate.
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I'll do whatever my team needs me to do.
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Yeah, you do!
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Whatever you need.
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My beer's back.
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Oh, f...
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Fuck's sake!
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Jesus Christ. Goddamn it!
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No-one wants to skate anymore, is that it?
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Do you want to sit here and breathe hard?
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Dougie, you're on.
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I want you to rough up a few of
these Reading cunts right now.
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The boys need some inspiration
and you can provide that.
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Let's go. Come on! Come on!
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Here it comes.
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You wanna go?
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Come on. Come on.
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Fight! Fight! Fight! Fight!
156
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Yes.
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Jesus Christ!
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Anders Cain with the opening salvo.
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- Come on, come on.
- Doug Glatt is rocked!
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Cain just keeps pouncing.
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'The Thug's in trouble, folks.
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What has happened to Doug Glatt,
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the champion in so many eyes?
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- You fuck!
- You popped your whole arm out.
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Fuck me.
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Did I lose?
167
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Our boy's moving on to greener pastures,
168
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but remember, once a Highlander...
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- Always a Highlander!
- Fuckin' A!
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This one's for you, Dougie.
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♪ Oh, Dougie boy
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♪ The pipes, the pipes are calling... ♪
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Jesus Christ, he's drunk already.
174
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Fuckin' right, man. Potato fuckin' salad.
175
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176
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You will never eat a meal in peace.
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Animals don't eat in peace.
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Animals eat pieces of dog shit.
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I'm not a fuckin' animal, man.
I'm a real person!
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- I got real fuckin' emotions!
- Fuck you.
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Ow, you fuckin' Neanderthals!
182
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I'm so fucking tired, Doug.
I'm not as fast as I used to be.
183
00:11:02,329 --> 00:11:04,081
I'm not as tough as I used to be.
184
00:11:04,247 --> 00:11:06,291
Dougie! This is all for you!
185
00:11:08,794 --> 00:11:11,296
How about you? How much recovery time?
186
00:11:12,798 --> 00:11:16,009
The doctor said that I should
never play hockey again.
187
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Tabarnak.
188
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Yeah, that's exactly what I said.
189
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And we have a baby coming.
190
00:11:25,811 --> 00:11:29,106
Eva's cousin, he's got a job opportunity
191
00:11:29,272 --> 00:11:31,441
at an insurance company.
192
00:11:33,694 --> 00:11:36,029
- I mean...
- Sing Dougie boy!
193
00:11:38,365 --> 00:11:40,617
...I got beaten.
194
00:11:40,784 --> 00:11:42,369
He beat me.
195
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I have to make responsible decisions.
196
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I got you. I got you.
197
00:11:50,085 --> 00:11:52,254
Stevesy, I think I'm gonna piss myself.
198
00:11:58,969 --> 00:12:03,932
Hey! There's my guy.
Stay there. I'll come to you.
199
00:12:04,099 --> 00:12:07,018
- Ooh. Yeah.
- Just stand here?
200
00:12:07,185 --> 00:12:09,146
Just, uh...
201
00:12:09,312 --> 00:12:11,232
- I told you I'm coming to you.
- I'm Doug Glatt.
202
00:12:11,398 --> 00:12:13,567
I said I was coming to you. I can do this.
203
00:12:13,734 --> 00:12:16,945
Prostate. It's like a fuckin' melon.
204
00:12:17,112 --> 00:12:20,615
There we go. See?
Flat, I'm fine. It's the stairs.
205
00:12:20,782 --> 00:12:22,659
- I'm Doug Glatt.
- Yeah. Bob Forbes.
206
00:12:22,826 --> 00:12:24,786
- Ow, my arm.
- Oh, yeah. Hell of an arm.
207
00:12:24,953 --> 00:12:26,496
How excited are you right now, huh?
208
00:12:26,663 --> 00:12:28,707
Yes. Thank you so much.
209
00:12:28,874 --> 00:12:30,500
- The windows here are great.
- Yeah.
210
00:12:30,667 --> 00:12:32,419
I'll tell you what, you deserve 'em,
211
00:12:32,586 --> 00:12:35,589
'cause the sky is the limit
here at Cornwallis Insurance.
212
00:12:35,756 --> 00:12:37,132
- Hmm.
- You seen the commercials?
213
00:12:37,299 --> 00:12:38,967
- No.
- Oh, you should.
214
00:12:39,134 --> 00:12:40,510
They're real good. It says...
215
00:12:40,677 --> 00:12:43,221
"Go ahead and call us. We're..."
216
00:12:43,388 --> 00:12:44,806
You want me to call you?
217
00:12:44,973 --> 00:12:46,475
No, I want you to finish the song.
218
00:12:46,641 --> 00:12:48,059
- "Cornwallis."
- Oh.
219
00:12:48,226 --> 00:12:51,062
Yeah. There he is. He's going up, this guy.
220
00:12:51,229 --> 00:12:53,148
Get in there.
221
00:12:54,733 --> 00:12:58,570
It used to be a jail.
Prisoners killed themselves.
222
00:12:58,737 --> 00:13:02,657
Doug Glatt, storage room. That's you.
223
00:13:02,824 --> 00:13:04,201
How's that feel?
224
00:13:04,367 --> 00:13:06,244
You know, you mentioned you play hockey.
225
00:13:06,411 --> 00:13:07,913
I used to watch a lot of hockey
226
00:13:08,079 --> 00:13:09,915
till it got too exciting for the old ticker.
227
00:13:10,081 --> 00:13:11,625
I had a massive heart attack.
228
00:13:12,918 --> 00:13:15,253
Yep, I am a sick man.
229
00:13:15,420 --> 00:13:17,297
Anyway, I'm lying on my death bed
230
00:13:17,464 --> 00:13:19,883
and that's when I got bit by
the selling insurance bug.
231
00:13:20,050 --> 00:13:22,344
Yeah, she laid eggs right inside of me
232
00:13:22,511 --> 00:13:23,887
and now you're here.
233
00:13:24,054 --> 00:13:25,347
I'm allergic to eggs.
234
00:13:25,514 --> 00:13:27,432
You're an idiot. Nobody's allergic to eggs.
235
00:13:27,599 --> 00:13:29,267
Oh, Christ, this guy.
236
00:13:29,434 --> 00:13:31,019
Come on. Come on. Come on! Come on!
237
00:13:31,186 --> 00:13:33,772
Get outta there! Quit! Quit that!
238
00:13:33,939 --> 00:13:36,942
It's like he's showing off, huh?
Nice thick stream.
239
00:13:37,108 --> 00:13:38,610
- Yeah.
- God.
240
00:13:38,777 --> 00:13:40,529
They got a whole alley to do that in
241
00:13:40,695 --> 00:13:42,447
and then they choose this window to piss on.
242
00:13:42,614 --> 00:13:45,158
- God, it's like crack to them.
- It's crazy.
243
00:13:45,325 --> 00:13:46,827
They also sell crack at that window.
244
00:13:46,993 --> 00:13:49,496
- Oh. Okay.
- Yeah. But don't worry.
245
00:13:49,663 --> 00:13:51,748
It's safe as long as you get out by sundown.
246
00:13:53,583 --> 00:13:55,919
That's when the handjobs start.
247
00:13:58,880 --> 00:14:00,382
What the...?
248
00:14:06,096 --> 00:14:08,139
There's a lot of cars in our driveway.
249
00:14:11,601 --> 00:14:15,063
- Aah! Surprise!
- Thank fuck!
250
00:14:17,315 --> 00:14:19,651
I was gonna be in town anyway,
so I thought to myself,
251
00:14:19,818 --> 00:14:21,712
wouldn't this be the perfect
opportunity to organise
252
00:14:21,736 --> 00:14:24,197
a little something for the two of you?
253
00:14:24,364 --> 00:14:27,075
Oh, I am so proud of you, Dougie.
254
00:14:27,242 --> 00:14:29,536
You found something secure and steady.
255
00:14:29,703 --> 00:14:33,248
You see? Everything has a time and a place.
256
00:14:33,415 --> 00:14:36,209
Thanks, Mom.
257
00:14:36,376 --> 00:14:39,337
A new house, a baby.
258
00:14:39,504 --> 00:14:41,256
I can't believe I'm gonna be a grandmother.
259
00:14:41,423 --> 00:14:43,091
If I'm being honest,
260
00:14:43,258 --> 00:14:45,635
there was a while where I never
thought it was gonna happen,
261
00:14:45,802 --> 00:14:47,762
what with Ira being the way he is and all.
262
00:14:47,929 --> 00:14:49,639
- Jesus, Mom.
- Wow.
263
00:14:49,806 --> 00:14:52,142
If it makes you feel better,
I go all kinds of ways.
264
00:14:52,309 --> 00:14:54,352
What kind of ways?
265
00:14:54,519 --> 00:14:55,896
Well, if you get me drunk enough,
266
00:14:56,062 --> 00:14:57,731
I'll munch a box, piss on an animal.
267
00:14:57,898 --> 00:15:01,276
I got all kinds of tricks.
268
00:15:01,443 --> 00:15:03,737
Feels like my ass blew up!
269
00:15:03,904 --> 00:15:07,282
Hey! There he is!
270
00:15:07,449 --> 00:15:09,200
Nah, nah, come on. Give me the good stuff.
271
00:15:09,367 --> 00:15:10,744
Give me the... No, no...
272
00:15:10,911 --> 00:15:13,371
273
00:15:15,081 --> 00:15:19,502
Fuckin' mazel tov. Mazel tov. In your ass.
274
00:15:19,669 --> 00:15:21,046
Oh, excuse me!
275
00:15:21,212 --> 00:15:23,882
- I didn't...
- Oh, fuck.
276
00:15:24,049 --> 00:15:25,943
Sorry, I was just pretending
to butt-fuck my friend.
277
00:15:25,967 --> 00:15:27,486
I don't think we've been properly introduced.
278
00:15:27,510 --> 00:15:30,055
I'm Patrick Hoolihan.
279
00:15:30,221 --> 00:15:31,765
We've met, you idiot.
280
00:15:31,932 --> 00:15:34,851
You wouldn't stop hitting on me
at Doug and Eva's wedding.
281
00:15:35,018 --> 00:15:37,812
Then you fell asleep and pissed yourself.
282
00:15:37,979 --> 00:15:40,523
- Nice. Represent.
- Yeah.
283
00:15:40,690 --> 00:15:43,234
- Pat, why do you have a boner?
- You JUST noticed that?
284
00:15:43,401 --> 00:15:46,488
- Wait, what? I have a what?
- It's nasty. Come on.
285
00:15:46,655 --> 00:15:48,323
- Clean it up.
- Yep, I know.
286
00:15:48,490 --> 00:15:50,075
No! Stop!
287
00:15:50,241 --> 00:15:51,743
I'm just trying to get rid of it.
288
00:15:51,910 --> 00:15:54,746
- Pat always gets boners.
- Aargh! Damn! Hi-yah!
289
00:16:07,092 --> 00:16:08,885
So, how was your first day?
290
00:16:09,052 --> 00:16:14,432
Work? Oh. It... Oh, it was so fun.
291
00:16:14,599 --> 00:16:17,602
Yeah, I mean, there was so many documents
292
00:16:17,769 --> 00:16:22,190
and phone calls to make and receive
293
00:16:22,357 --> 00:16:25,610
and you sit a lot.
294
00:16:25,777 --> 00:16:27,278
Like, pretty much the whole day.
295
00:16:27,445 --> 00:16:31,616
You know, so it's safe.
You know, it's really safe.
296
00:16:31,783 --> 00:16:34,119
Plus, there's a Harvey's
close by, which is good.
297
00:16:36,913 --> 00:16:40,667
Hey. I'm proud of you.
298
00:16:40,834 --> 00:16:42,335
Of us.
299
00:16:42,502 --> 00:16:44,421
We're doing this.
300
00:16:45,463 --> 00:16:48,633
It's... it's a fuckin' lot and...
301
00:16:48,800 --> 00:16:53,972
...it's crazy, but we're doing it together.
302
00:16:55,140 --> 00:16:57,809
- A team.
- Yeah, we're a team.
303
00:16:57,976 --> 00:16:59,686
Got each other's backs.
304
00:17:02,605 --> 00:17:04,941
I know it's hard for you.
305
00:17:05,108 --> 00:17:07,610
I mean, I know you miss it
306
00:17:07,777 --> 00:17:10,321
and I miss it too.
307
00:17:10,488 --> 00:17:13,116
I love watching you play,
308
00:17:13,283 --> 00:17:16,161
but I love you
309
00:17:16,327 --> 00:17:19,664
and the family we're gonna have more.
310
00:17:19,831 --> 00:17:23,501
Ah! Christ. Droppin' loads.
311
00:17:23,668 --> 00:17:28,339
Droppin' fuckin' hot
meatball loads from my asshole.
312
00:17:30,425 --> 00:17:32,093
Hey, Pat.
313
00:17:32,260 --> 00:17:34,262
Just... I was just...
314
00:17:34,429 --> 00:17:37,515
I'm having... I'm having
some stomach issues today.
315
00:17:38,975 --> 00:17:40,351
Ladies and germs, welcome to
316
00:17:40,518 --> 00:17:42,812
the Bruised and Battered
Hockey Fighting Competition,
317
00:17:42,979 --> 00:17:44,481
proudly banned in 11 states,
318
00:17:44,647 --> 00:17:46,316
six provinces and one territory.
319
00:17:46,483 --> 00:17:48,526
The hockey tournament
for retired fourth-liners
320
00:17:48,693 --> 00:17:50,570
with only one rule -
321
00:17:50,737 --> 00:17:52,238
no hockey.
322
00:17:52,405 --> 00:17:53,782
You know, I'll tell you,
323
00:17:53,948 --> 00:17:55,628
'Hot Ice' would've been all over this shit.
324
00:17:55,784 --> 00:17:57,452
Fuckin' kids these days
325
00:17:57,619 --> 00:18:00,914
with their fuckin' YouTube
326
00:18:01,081 --> 00:18:02,832
and fuckin' ISIS.
327
00:18:02,999 --> 00:18:05,960
I'll tell you what, I'm into new shit now,
328
00:18:06,127 --> 00:18:07,962
but lately, Dougie, my new thing,
329
00:18:08,129 --> 00:18:10,340
I'm all about going fuckin' door-to-door
330
00:18:10,507 --> 00:18:12,509
selling fuckin' china dogs.
331
00:18:12,675 --> 00:18:14,844
Look at this fuckin' thing, right?
332
00:18:15,011 --> 00:18:16,763
You know, you fuckin'...
333
00:18:16,930 --> 00:18:19,516
You put it some place,
you put it another place,
334
00:18:19,682 --> 00:18:21,351
people fuckin' look at it.
335
00:18:21,518 --> 00:18:23,520
It does every... it does
everything it needs to do.
336
00:18:23,686 --> 00:18:25,480
Dope, right?
337
00:18:25,647 --> 00:18:27,023
Dougie?
338
00:18:27,190 --> 00:18:29,859
I keep going over it and over it in my head.
339
00:18:31,820 --> 00:18:34,322
He was unlike anybody I've ever fought before.
340
00:18:35,573 --> 00:18:39,285
He was faster, meaner...
341
00:18:40,328 --> 00:18:42,705
Thank God Eva wasn't watching when he beat me.
342
00:18:42,872 --> 00:18:46,209
And now, the main event of the evening,
343
00:18:46,376 --> 00:18:49,295
fighting for the $400 grand prize
344
00:18:49,462 --> 00:18:52,507
is reigning champ Ross 'The Boss'...
345
00:18:52,674 --> 00:18:55,260
- Rhea.
- ..Rhea!
346
00:18:55,426 --> 00:18:57,387
Yep. You kicked the shit out of him.
347
00:18:57,554 --> 00:19:00,598
He looks like 265 pounds of dog shit
348
00:19:00,765 --> 00:19:02,517
stuffed into fuckin' ice skates,
349
00:19:02,684 --> 00:19:06,604
but I'll tell you what,
motherfucker can still bang.
350
00:19:11,860 --> 00:19:13,528
- Hey, Barnsie.
- Boss man.
351
00:19:13,695 --> 00:19:15,905
- How's the shoulder?
- Fucked as usual.
352
00:19:16,072 --> 00:19:17,907
Thanks for asking, though.
353
00:19:18,074 --> 00:19:20,326
Alright, I'll make it quick for you.
354
00:19:20,493 --> 00:19:21,870
Fuck you.
355
00:19:26,457 --> 00:19:28,585
Let's go, Barnsie!
356
00:19:31,588 --> 00:19:32,922
357
00:19:45,935 --> 00:19:47,854
358
00:19:49,314 --> 00:19:51,000
- You alright, Barnes?
- Urgh! Go fuck yourself.
359
00:19:51,024 --> 00:19:55,737
Jesus fucking Christ,
it's a fucking crime scene.
360
00:20:06,414 --> 00:20:07,790
I love you!
361
00:20:07,957 --> 00:20:10,210
The Bruised and Battered competition
362
00:20:10,376 --> 00:20:13,421
would like to thank you
for your continued support,
363
00:20:13,588 --> 00:20:16,257
but we are especially thankful...
364
00:20:18,885 --> 00:20:21,221
...to the Dartmouth Wig Outlet.
365
00:20:21,387 --> 00:20:23,306
You won't wig out at their prices.
366
00:20:23,473 --> 00:20:26,059
Your fuckin' sister wears a wig!
367
00:20:27,769 --> 00:20:29,145
Alright,
368
00:20:29,312 --> 00:20:32,148
I got some people I wanna thank too.
369
00:20:32,315 --> 00:20:33,816
You fuckin' people.
370
00:20:33,983 --> 00:20:35,610
Yeah.
371
00:20:35,777 --> 00:20:39,239
That's right. I used to think I was done.
372
00:20:39,405 --> 00:20:42,992
Maybe there... there is a time for everybody,
373
00:20:43,159 --> 00:20:45,995
but when I step out on this ice,
374
00:20:46,162 --> 00:20:47,872
and I see all you cheering me on,
375
00:20:48,039 --> 00:20:49,958
I know my time ain't done yet.
376
00:20:50,124 --> 00:20:51,501
Thank you very much.
377
00:20:51,668 --> 00:20:53,127
You're the fuckin' man, Ross!
378
00:20:53,294 --> 00:20:55,546
Ross! Ross! Ross! Ross! Ross!
379
00:20:55,713 --> 00:20:58,925
Ross! Ross! Ross! Ross! Ross! Ross!
380
00:21:01,427 --> 00:21:03,638
I'm James Duthie.
381
00:21:03,805 --> 00:21:06,516
And I'm Chad Bailey.
You're watching Sports Desk.
382
00:21:06,683 --> 00:21:08,810
Sports Desk. We're all pink on the inside.
383
00:21:08,977 --> 00:21:10,728
Oh, Jesus Christ.
384
00:21:10,895 --> 00:21:12,522
Anyway, Halifax's woeful losing streak
385
00:21:12,689 --> 00:21:14,065
extends to 12 straight losses
386
00:21:14,232 --> 00:21:15,566
to start the year.
387
00:21:15,733 --> 00:21:17,318
They've been in a rut
388
00:21:17,485 --> 00:21:19,565
since their disastrous
season-opening loss to Reading
389
00:21:19,612 --> 00:21:22,407
which saw then-captain
Doug Glatt hospitalised
390
00:21:22,573 --> 00:21:24,492
following what would be a career-ending tilt
391
00:21:24,659 --> 00:21:26,119
with Anders Cain.
392
00:21:26,286 --> 00:21:30,164
Can the Highlanders find a way
to turn things around?
393
00:21:30,331 --> 00:21:32,458
I bought this team 'cause I win.
394
00:21:32,625 --> 00:21:33,668
I know.
395
00:21:33,835 --> 00:21:35,896
This lockout should be
the best thing that ever happened,
396
00:21:35,920 --> 00:21:37,297
but we're blowing it.
397
00:21:37,463 --> 00:21:39,007
We are going after the biggest names
398
00:21:39,173 --> 00:21:40,550
on this side of the Atlantic,
399
00:21:40,717 --> 00:21:42,135
players you can build a team around,
400
00:21:42,302 --> 00:21:43,803
starting with Anders.
401
00:21:43,970 --> 00:21:47,932
- Wait. Your son?
- Yeah.
402
00:21:48,099 --> 00:21:51,811
He's been a fuckin' beast for Reading,
403
00:21:51,978 --> 00:21:55,648
not to mention he almost
single-handedly eviscerated us.
404
00:21:55,815 --> 00:21:57,650
Why are you taking so much joy?
405
00:21:57,817 --> 00:22:00,236
He pretty much ended
Dougie's fucking hockey career.
406
00:22:00,403 --> 00:22:03,239
I think Glatt's career
was ending all by itself.
407
00:22:03,406 --> 00:22:05,616
Well, we're never gonna
know that now, are we?
408
00:22:05,783 --> 00:22:08,286
No offence, Hyrum, okay,
409
00:22:08,453 --> 00:22:11,414
but you and your son are not
exactly Walter and Wayne.
410
00:22:11,581 --> 00:22:14,625
That shit is behind us.
You can believe he won't fuck this up.
411
00:22:14,792 --> 00:22:16,461
He knows what's at stake.
412
00:22:16,627 --> 00:22:20,214
We go all in for Anders,
you're gonna make him captain,
413
00:22:20,381 --> 00:22:23,259
and I'm gonna...
I'm gonna keep his ass in line.
414
00:22:23,426 --> 00:22:25,226
Hyrum, please. Captain? Let's talk about this.
415
00:22:25,303 --> 00:22:27,388
- Ronnie.
- Let's think about the A...
416
00:22:27,555 --> 00:22:29,015
- Ronnie.
- ..before we get to the C.
417
00:22:29,182 --> 00:22:32,018
Ronnie, you're gonna coach my kid.
418
00:22:32,185 --> 00:22:34,062
You're gonna build a team around him.
419
00:22:34,228 --> 00:22:35,605
You're gonna make him captain
420
00:22:35,772 --> 00:22:37,732
or I'm gonna find
some other fuckin' guy who will.
421
00:22:37,857 --> 00:22:39,317
- Fine.
- Good.
422
00:22:39,484 --> 00:22:42,820
Fine. Better than being on the dole.
423
00:22:57,460 --> 00:22:59,170
- Hey.
- Hey.
424
00:23:00,546 --> 00:23:02,757
- Thanks for coming.
- Thanks for inviting me.
425
00:23:02,924 --> 00:23:07,220
- Welcome. What do you think?
- I think it's...
426
00:23:07,387 --> 00:23:10,264
I think it's all... you.
427
00:23:10,431 --> 00:23:12,308
- As it should be, right?
- As it should be.
428
00:23:12,475 --> 00:23:13,893
- Great room.
- Great room.
429
00:23:14,060 --> 00:23:15,686
Can I get you a soda pop or...?
430
00:23:15,853 --> 00:23:19,107
- Uh...
- Sunflower seeds?
431
00:23:19,273 --> 00:23:21,943
- Uh... Uh, yeah. Seeds are good.
- Help yourself. Uh, sit down.
432
00:23:27,240 --> 00:23:28,991
Sunflower seeds are for winners.
433
00:23:33,871 --> 00:23:37,291
- Son...
- Sorry.
434
00:23:40,420 --> 00:23:41,963
You're carrying the torch now.
435
00:23:42,130 --> 00:23:45,049
- Yes, sir.
- You're the one.
436
00:23:45,216 --> 00:23:47,510
- Over to you.
- Holding the torch.
437
00:23:47,677 --> 00:23:51,222
Our name's on your back. Our family.
438
00:23:51,389 --> 00:23:54,976
Our family, and, actually,
um, Mom was asking if...
439
00:23:55,143 --> 00:23:57,395
Our name is a currency in this town.
440
00:23:57,562 --> 00:23:58,938
Absolutely.
441
00:23:59,105 --> 00:24:02,024
I don't want you to fuck this up. Not this time.
442
00:24:02,191 --> 00:24:05,445
This season's everything. The world is watching.
443
00:24:05,611 --> 00:24:07,738
Maybe not the world.
444
00:24:07,905 --> 00:24:10,324
I mean, Canada, probably, but...
445
00:24:10,491 --> 00:24:13,494
And, like, three or four states.
446
00:24:13,661 --> 00:24:14,912
Stand up.
447
00:24:18,499 --> 00:24:19,876
- I'm giving you the C.
- Yeah.
448
00:24:20,042 --> 00:24:21,603
- You're gonna prove me right.
- Yes, sir.
449
00:24:21,627 --> 00:24:23,045
- You're gonna win.
- Gonna win.
450
00:24:23,212 --> 00:24:25,882
- Stay the fuck out of trouble.
- Therapy worked this time.
451
00:24:27,967 --> 00:24:30,207
- I don't wanna hear about that.
- I won't talk about it.
452
00:24:30,303 --> 00:24:32,263
- That's for your mom.
- Yes, sir.
453
00:24:32,430 --> 00:24:33,949
- That's shit for your mom.
- Yes, sir.
454
00:24:33,973 --> 00:24:36,142
Don't bring shit up like that.
455
00:24:36,309 --> 00:24:39,061
456
00:24:39,228 --> 00:24:42,231
457
00:24:42,398 --> 00:24:46,068
458
00:24:46,235 --> 00:24:49,864
459
00:24:50,031 --> 00:24:51,657
460
00:24:51,824 --> 00:24:57,330
461
00:24:57,497 --> 00:25:00,458
462
00:25:00,625 --> 00:25:03,002
463
00:25:03,169 --> 00:25:05,463
464
00:25:05,630 --> 00:25:07,965
465
00:25:09,008 --> 00:25:11,010
466
00:26:01,852 --> 00:26:04,146
He has hair like a lion.
467
00:26:06,065 --> 00:26:07,608
Bring it in! Bring it in!
468
00:26:09,068 --> 00:26:10,528
Okay, boys,
469
00:26:10,695 --> 00:26:13,030
we kind of fucked up
the start of this thing, eh?
470
00:26:13,197 --> 00:26:14,699
So now, we got a few lads
471
00:26:14,865 --> 00:26:16,951
who earn their wages up at the big show
472
00:26:17,118 --> 00:26:19,537
down here with us wearing our jerseys.
473
00:26:19,704 --> 00:26:22,707
- Jean Pierre Finch.
- Yo.
474
00:26:22,873 --> 00:26:26,127
We got, uh, Pet... Petr 'Petri Dish' Petrov.
475
00:26:26,294 --> 00:26:28,838
A lot of Ps.
476
00:26:29,005 --> 00:26:31,966
- What's he doing?
- He's handing out candy.
477
00:26:32,133 --> 00:26:33,968
Candy?
478
00:26:34,135 --> 00:26:36,512
It's a Slovak tradition, maybe?
479
00:26:36,679 --> 00:26:38,222
Better be.
480
00:26:39,599 --> 00:26:41,183
Oh, my God.
481
00:26:43,519 --> 00:26:45,980
Okay. And Anders Cain.
482
00:26:47,940 --> 00:26:50,735
Okay. Super-duper.
483
00:26:50,901 --> 00:26:53,613
Okay, now that Dougie's retired,
we need a new captain,
484
00:26:53,779 --> 00:26:58,826
and I cannot think of
a better leadership tandem
485
00:26:58,993 --> 00:27:01,704
than Xavier LaFlamme with the A,
486
00:27:01,871 --> 00:27:03,289
Anders Cain as captain.
487
00:27:03,456 --> 00:27:04,999
There you go. Alright.
488
00:27:12,173 --> 00:27:13,549
Alright.
489
00:27:13,716 --> 00:27:15,760
This ice is shit. Fix it.
490
00:27:15,926 --> 00:27:17,553
Perhaps the new captain
491
00:27:17,720 --> 00:27:19,930
would like to say a few words to his team.
492
00:27:21,307 --> 00:27:22,907
- You'll be alright, son.
- Right. Right.
493
00:27:24,393 --> 00:27:28,064
Nothing else fucking matters if we don't win.
494
00:27:28,230 --> 00:27:32,234
If they brought me here to win,
my dad brought me here to win,
495
00:27:32,401 --> 00:27:34,445
that's what we're gonna fuckin' do.
496
00:27:34,612 --> 00:27:36,252
Anybody here like fuckin' sunflower seeds?
497
00:27:36,280 --> 00:27:38,175
Well, this bar and sunflower seeds
are fuckin' winners.
498
00:27:38,199 --> 00:27:40,034
- Hey, hey...
- Fuck, yeah!
499
00:27:40,201 --> 00:27:42,121
- Great. That's good. Yeah.
- Fucking right, Dad.
500
00:27:42,244 --> 00:27:43,579
- Right?
- Right.
501
00:27:46,082 --> 00:27:49,418
I know many of you are veterans.
502
00:27:49,585 --> 00:27:52,046
Many of you are old friends.
503
00:27:52,213 --> 00:27:53,857
Many of you have never worn another sweater.
504
00:27:53,881 --> 00:27:56,467
I'm here to tell you
all of that gets you nothing.
505
00:27:57,677 --> 00:28:00,721
Produce, you will be rewarded.
Don't, you'll be sent packing.
506
00:28:00,888 --> 00:28:03,015
It's a buyers' market out there,
so for most of you,
507
00:28:03,182 --> 00:28:04,558
that's your fucking career gone.
508
00:28:09,647 --> 00:28:11,399
You fucked up the first part of this season.
509
00:28:11,565 --> 00:28:13,234
Find a way to be relevant!
510
00:28:13,401 --> 00:28:16,237
Make yourself fucking relevant
511
00:28:16,404 --> 00:28:18,781
- because from this point on...
- Fuck!
512
00:28:18,948 --> 00:28:20,700
...from where I'm fucking standing...
513
00:28:23,577 --> 00:28:24,912
Ah, fuck!
514
00:28:25,079 --> 00:28:26,455
...it's Darwin.
515
00:28:26,622 --> 00:28:28,958
Come on, guys! I'm paying my rent here!
516
00:28:29,125 --> 00:28:30,501
Real hockey, guys!
517
00:28:30,668 --> 00:28:35,798
Hey! You! Look alive, man!
Who the fuck is Darwin?
518
00:28:57,194 --> 00:28:58,904
Anders, new team, new city.
519
00:28:59,071 --> 00:29:00,448
Any message to the fans?
520
00:29:00,614 --> 00:29:03,701
They brought me here to win.
521
00:29:03,868 --> 00:29:05,244
Care to confirm or deny
522
00:29:05,411 --> 00:29:07,121
the rumours of your captaincy?
523
00:29:13,753 --> 00:29:15,588
It's my team now.
524
00:29:15,755 --> 00:29:18,132
Xavier LaFlamme declined to comment.
525
00:29:29,226 --> 00:29:32,354
526
00:29:51,332 --> 00:29:53,501
Whoa.
527
00:29:53,667 --> 00:29:56,879
- What's the bag for?
- These are just documents.
528
00:29:57,046 --> 00:29:58,714
This is a huge bag full of documents.
529
00:29:58,881 --> 00:30:00,841
I'm going to the insurance festival.
530
00:30:01,008 --> 00:30:02,468
Huh?
531
00:30:02,635 --> 00:30:04,678
Well, I gotta go, Eva. It's real late. 'Bye.
532
00:30:06,263 --> 00:30:09,850
What... the fuck?
533
00:30:36,752 --> 00:30:38,420
Hello, sir.
534
00:30:42,007 --> 00:30:44,885
Holy shit on Mary's tits.
535
00:30:45,052 --> 00:30:47,721
The fuck are you doing here?
536
00:30:49,431 --> 00:30:50,975
I came here to see you.
537
00:30:55,104 --> 00:30:57,898
I got injured. My right arm.
538
00:30:58,065 --> 00:30:59,775
Yeah, I saw that.
539
00:30:59,942 --> 00:31:02,069
Hard lad, is Anders Cain.
540
00:31:04,280 --> 00:31:06,198
So, what are you doing with the hockey bag?
541
00:31:09,827 --> 00:31:12,997
- I wanna be a Highlander again.
- Oh, Jesus, kid.
542
00:31:15,124 --> 00:31:18,711
- Will you train me?
- Train you to what?
543
00:31:18,878 --> 00:31:21,297
Teach me to fight with my left.
544
00:31:21,463 --> 00:31:22,840
Teach me to skate better.
545
00:31:23,007 --> 00:31:25,509
What the fuck do I know about skating, Doug?
546
00:31:25,676 --> 00:31:27,595
You see what I do in there.
547
00:31:29,138 --> 00:31:33,559
We can train another time
if you're not able to right now.
548
00:31:33,726 --> 00:31:36,604
There's a restaurant nearby that sells hot dogs.
549
00:31:36,770 --> 00:31:38,147
We could just eat those instead.
550
00:31:38,314 --> 00:31:39,523
Hot dogs?
551
00:31:39,690 --> 00:31:41,191
Yeah, it's like a sausage sandwich.
552
00:31:41,358 --> 00:31:42,860
I know what a fuckin' hot dog is.
553
00:31:43,027 --> 00:31:44,570
It looks like a penis.
554
00:31:45,946 --> 00:31:47,489
Jesus Christ.
555
00:31:49,575 --> 00:31:50,659
Alright.
556
00:31:50,826 --> 00:31:53,203
20 minutes. We go in there,
get it out of your system.
557
00:31:53,370 --> 00:31:56,332
- Then you go right home, eh?
- Thank you, sir.
558
00:31:58,876 --> 00:32:01,712
Oh, goddamn it. Not again!
559
00:32:03,130 --> 00:32:04,840
They better not have fuckin'...
560
00:32:05,007 --> 00:32:08,093
Aw, shit!
561
00:32:09,929 --> 00:32:12,139
I left my fuckin' bus pass in there.
562
00:32:13,641 --> 00:32:16,226
I need my fuckin' bus pass!
563
00:32:16,393 --> 00:32:19,772
- What time is it?
- 11:37.
564
00:32:19,939 --> 00:32:21,482
Wait.
565
00:32:23,067 --> 00:32:24,443
11:38.
566
00:32:24,610 --> 00:32:28,155
- Did you just get home?
- Yeah.
567
00:32:28,322 --> 00:32:30,824
The insurance carnival was long.
568
00:32:30,991 --> 00:32:31,991
569
00:32:32,034 --> 00:32:35,746
I was meeting all these people who do insurance.
570
00:32:36,956 --> 00:32:39,667
It's really safe.
571
00:32:39,833 --> 00:32:41,585
It's a real thing.
572
00:32:41,752 --> 00:32:44,421
It doesn't sound like a real thing.
573
00:32:44,588 --> 00:32:49,551
- Uh... It...
- Mmm. You smell like hot dogs.
574
00:32:52,513 --> 00:32:54,348
Thank you.
575
00:33:06,276 --> 00:33:08,612
That's it. Rotate.
576
00:33:08,779 --> 00:33:11,073
Rotate. Alright, now give me that left across.
577
00:33:11,240 --> 00:33:14,034
578
00:33:14,201 --> 00:33:16,912
579
00:33:18,080 --> 00:33:21,542
580
00:33:21,709 --> 00:33:24,294
Halifax Highlanders and the Hamilton Steelers.
581
00:33:24,461 --> 00:33:25,981
Now LaFlamme's just hammered in the corner.
582
00:33:26,005 --> 00:33:27,548
He's run into and checked.
583
00:33:27,715 --> 00:33:29,675
- Sorry. Take a second.
- Tagged ya.
584
00:33:29,842 --> 00:33:31,260
- Tagged ya again.
- Sorry, bud.
585
00:33:31,427 --> 00:33:33,113
Stop fuckin' saying sorry.
I'm kickin' your ass, boy.
586
00:33:33,137 --> 00:33:34,888
Now Dupere digs the puck out of the corner.
587
00:33:35,055 --> 00:33:37,433
Moves into the back! He scores!
588
00:33:39,309 --> 00:33:41,729
Whatever, man. I could have
stopped that with your dick.
589
00:33:41,895 --> 00:33:43,605
And it is a 3-0 lead
590
00:33:43,772 --> 00:33:45,566
for Hamilton over Halifax.
591
00:33:46,608 --> 00:33:49,236
Uppercut.
592
00:33:49,403 --> 00:33:50,446
593
00:33:50,612 --> 00:33:54,408
594
00:33:56,285 --> 00:33:58,370
595
00:33:59,663 --> 00:34:01,874
The newest Highlander, Anders Cain, scores!
596
00:34:03,083 --> 00:34:04,460
Brilliant individual effort
597
00:34:04,626 --> 00:34:06,253
by Anders Cain.
598
00:34:06,420 --> 00:34:08,464
Uh... uh... Keep it down, Dougie.
599
00:34:08,630 --> 00:34:10,966
For fuck's sake, how many times
do I have to tell you?
600
00:34:11,133 --> 00:34:12,509
Just the left!
601
00:34:16,263 --> 00:34:18,140
Put some heat on it, boy.
602
00:34:18,307 --> 00:34:20,809
There you go! That's the one I'm lookin' for.
603
00:34:20,976 --> 00:34:23,937
Here's Anders Cain. He scores!
604
00:34:24,104 --> 00:34:25,939
Anders Cain and... Uh-oh!
605
00:34:26,106 --> 00:34:28,901
Just like that, down goes Davinsky!
606
00:34:29,068 --> 00:34:30,068
Ah, Christ!
607
00:34:30,110 --> 00:34:31,862
And he'll head straight to the penalty box.
608
00:34:32,029 --> 00:34:33,447
Fuck you!
609
00:34:35,240 --> 00:34:36,492
And now the...
610
00:34:36,658 --> 00:34:38,160
- Score!
- Fuck!
611
00:34:38,327 --> 00:34:39,703
Ah. Damn it.
612
00:34:39,870 --> 00:34:41,371
Well past the midpoint of the season,
613
00:34:41,538 --> 00:34:43,749
Cain and the Highlanders
are their own worst enemies
614
00:34:43,916 --> 00:34:45,501
as they remain in
the play-off bubble.
615
00:34:50,297 --> 00:34:52,299
616
00:34:54,009 --> 00:34:57,679
Yeah! You're workin' your ass off, kid.
617
00:34:57,846 --> 00:34:59,807
There's a ceiling on your skating,
618
00:34:59,973 --> 00:35:02,333
and that left hand's never
gonna be as strong as your right,
619
00:35:02,476 --> 00:35:04,520
but trust me, it'll fuck somebody up.
620
00:35:05,854 --> 00:35:08,148
Listen, Dougie, there's
something you might wanna know.
621
00:35:08,315 --> 00:35:10,776
The shitshow's movin'.
622
00:35:10,943 --> 00:35:13,695
Next Bruised and Battered's
gonna be at the MetroCentre.
623
00:35:15,114 --> 00:35:17,533
You want to be a Highlander, that's your ticket.
624
00:35:17,699 --> 00:35:19,326
There's your audition, boy.
625
00:35:19,493 --> 00:35:20,869
Hyrum's gonna be watchin'.
626
00:35:21,036 --> 00:35:23,956
You can show him and everyone else
you're still fucking here.
627
00:35:24,123 --> 00:35:25,874
What do you say?
628
00:35:28,418 --> 00:35:29,920
While they keep finding ways to win,
629
00:35:30,087 --> 00:35:32,422
the Highlanders keep
finding ways to lose too.
630
00:35:32,589 --> 00:35:34,069
Many are blaming the hot-and-cold play
631
00:35:34,133 --> 00:35:35,300
of Anders Cain,
632
00:35:35,467 --> 00:35:37,052
who sits 31st in scoring
633
00:35:37,219 --> 00:35:39,012
but leads the league in penalty minutes.
634
00:35:39,179 --> 00:35:41,974
We've dropped 8 of the last 10.
635
00:35:42,141 --> 00:35:44,061
We take penalties away,
other teams change lines.
636
00:35:44,226 --> 00:35:47,312
- I'm trying.
- What do I say?
637
00:35:49,022 --> 00:35:51,984
Don't fucking try. Fucking win.
638
00:35:53,235 --> 00:35:55,529
Wake them the fuck up, alright?
639
00:35:55,696 --> 00:35:57,447
Wake 'em the fuck up. Yes, sir.
640
00:35:57,614 --> 00:36:00,159
Good.
641
00:36:00,325 --> 00:36:02,578
Lead these guys.
642
00:36:02,744 --> 00:36:04,121
That tie is too short, Chad.
643
00:36:04,288 --> 00:36:06,999
Or I know exactly
what the fuck I'm doing, James!
644
00:36:07,166 --> 00:36:08,542
Sports Desk.
645
00:36:08,709 --> 00:36:12,296
We know exactly what the fuck we're doing, James.
646
00:36:12,462 --> 00:36:13,922
Oh, my gosh. Thank God.
647
00:36:14,089 --> 00:36:16,008
It feels so good to be out of the house,
648
00:36:16,175 --> 00:36:18,093
and I am so excited about this restaurant.
649
00:36:18,260 --> 00:36:22,139
Me and the baby are gonna eat
the shit out of some pad thai.
650
00:36:22,306 --> 00:36:24,558
Oh, why are we taking the long way? It's not...
651
00:36:28,645 --> 00:36:31,148
Doug, do you want to go in and say a quick hello?
652
00:36:31,315 --> 00:36:33,596
Well, I'll be honest,
I already ate and I'm already drunk,
653
00:36:33,650 --> 00:36:35,277
so the bar seems to make sense.
654
00:36:35,444 --> 00:36:37,029
For fuck's sake!
655
00:36:37,196 --> 00:36:39,448
Man, it feels like it was fuckin' yesterday
656
00:36:39,615 --> 00:36:42,075
that I was working here,
657
00:36:42,242 --> 00:36:44,161
bartender, boyfriend who played hockey.
658
00:36:44,328 --> 00:36:45,704
Yep.
659
00:36:45,871 --> 00:36:48,665
Now I'm pregnant and married
to a guy who says we're a team,
660
00:36:48,832 --> 00:36:51,168
but he's always gone and
feels he has to hide the fact
661
00:36:51,335 --> 00:36:52,711
that he eats hot dogs.
662
00:36:52,878 --> 00:36:55,255
What the fuck happened? Are we these people now?
663
00:36:55,422 --> 00:36:56,882
This is... this is who we are?
664
00:36:57,049 --> 00:36:59,426
Oh, yeah, that's us. You and me, baby.
665
00:36:59,593 --> 00:37:02,763
- No, me and... me and Doug are...
- I gotta take a piss.
666
00:37:02,930 --> 00:37:04,598
- Okay.
- I still got my jacket on.
667
00:37:06,892 --> 00:37:09,937
- Get me another beer.
- Yep.
668
00:37:10,103 --> 00:37:11,939
So, Dougie, how's that new job going?
669
00:37:12,105 --> 00:37:14,608
Oh, it... it's so... fun.
670
00:37:14,775 --> 00:37:19,571
Yeah, there's... there's all
these documents, you know?
671
00:37:19,738 --> 00:37:22,074
I get to bring a thermos to work,
672
00:37:22,241 --> 00:37:24,284
which keeps my food hot and cold.
673
00:37:24,451 --> 00:37:27,246
Sometimes I put hamburgers in there.
674
00:37:27,412 --> 00:37:29,456
It's up to me.
675
00:37:30,624 --> 00:37:33,710
The way we're playing,
we're all gonna need a new job soon.
676
00:37:33,877 --> 00:37:36,964
I suppose I could go back to
Pentecostal summer camp
677
00:37:37,130 --> 00:37:38,840
with my cousin's boyfriend.
678
00:37:39,007 --> 00:37:42,177
I'm gonna have to move back with Mum.
679
00:37:42,344 --> 00:37:44,638
And don't get me wrong, I love her to bits,
680
00:37:44,805 --> 00:37:47,391
but that bedpan fills up fuckin' fast.
681
00:37:47,557 --> 00:37:51,019
I don't want to work at my uncle's eel farm.
682
00:37:51,186 --> 00:37:52,396
683
00:37:55,232 --> 00:37:57,609
I don't know how to do anything else.
684
00:38:03,198 --> 00:38:06,118
Ah, you know, it's just a slump, boys.
685
00:38:07,160 --> 00:38:08,704
It shall pass.
686
00:38:10,163 --> 00:38:11,540
Come on, get 'em in ya!
687
00:38:11,707 --> 00:38:13,583
688
00:38:15,585 --> 00:38:18,880
All the drinks in this country taste like piss.
689
00:38:19,047 --> 00:38:21,717
It taste like a Cossack shit in my mouth.
690
00:38:21,883 --> 00:38:25,137
Oh, that tastes like burps.
691
00:38:40,068 --> 00:38:43,363
- Welcome home, kid.
- Thanks.
692
00:38:43,530 --> 00:38:46,158
Big night, eh? Everybody watchin'.
693
00:38:48,952 --> 00:38:50,329
Don't worry. You'll be fine.
694
00:38:50,495 --> 00:38:52,655
What poor bastard they got you
matched up with tonight?
695
00:38:52,748 --> 00:38:55,542
Didn't they tell you? Format's been changed.
696
00:38:55,709 --> 00:38:57,169
Changed to what?
697
00:38:57,336 --> 00:38:59,212
Ladies and gentlemen,
698
00:38:59,379 --> 00:39:01,298
the Bruised and Battered competition
699
00:39:01,465 --> 00:39:03,717
is proud to bring you tonight's special event.
700
00:39:03,884 --> 00:39:06,303
10 fighters, one rink, one fight
701
00:39:06,470 --> 00:39:09,139
in our first-ever battle royale!
702
00:39:09,306 --> 00:39:10,974
- Fuck him up!
- Are you ready?
703
00:39:13,393 --> 00:39:17,230
- Are you ready?
- Really bad idea.
704
00:39:18,899 --> 00:39:20,776
Shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit.
705
00:39:32,496 --> 00:39:34,873
Oh, jeez. Oh, jeez! Oh, jeez!
706
00:39:38,126 --> 00:39:41,088
- Aarrgh!
- Jesus Christ on a bike.
707
00:39:41,254 --> 00:39:43,298
Fuck you, Glatt.
708
00:39:57,979 --> 00:39:59,579
- What are we doing here?
- I don't know.
709
00:39:59,731 --> 00:40:02,025
I went to fuckin' Princeton.
710
00:40:12,369 --> 00:40:14,037
You look like Super Mario.
711
00:40:14,204 --> 00:40:16,415
Hey, Andrew.
712
00:40:20,043 --> 00:40:22,170
My fuck, can he still bang.
713
00:40:29,886 --> 00:40:31,263
Come on, big guy.
714
00:40:31,430 --> 00:40:33,181
What are you, like, fuckin' 15 years old?
715
00:40:39,271 --> 00:40:40,647
Ross! Ross! Ross! Ross! Ross!
716
00:40:40,814 --> 00:40:43,733
Let him go. Let me go. Let me go. I'm the ref.
717
00:40:43,900 --> 00:40:45,652
Let me go!
718
00:40:47,404 --> 00:40:48,780
Fuck it.
719
00:40:57,289 --> 00:40:59,916
You're one tough motherfucker, Dougie!
720
00:41:14,931 --> 00:41:18,643
- Hey, kid.
- Hi, sir.
721
00:41:18,810 --> 00:41:22,147
You alright?
722
00:41:23,190 --> 00:41:27,068
Yeah. I've been better.
723
00:41:27,235 --> 00:41:28,737
Fight! Fight! Fight! Fight!
724
00:41:28,904 --> 00:41:30,280
Ah, fuck.
725
00:41:30,447 --> 00:41:32,699
Fight! Fight! Fight! Fight! Fight! Fight!
726
00:41:32,866 --> 00:41:35,118
Let's not reinvent the wheel here, eh?
727
00:41:35,285 --> 00:41:38,413
Doug! Doug! Doug! Doug! Doug! Doug! Doug!
728
00:41:38,580 --> 00:41:40,081
Doug! Doug! Doug! Doug! Doug!
729
00:41:40,248 --> 00:41:43,835
Hey, wait. I got you, buddy.
730
00:41:44,002 --> 00:41:46,838
Maybe we should leave.
731
00:41:47,005 --> 00:41:49,674
I got you.
732
00:42:02,896 --> 00:42:06,733
Well, that was a fuckin' shitshow, eh?
733
00:42:08,735 --> 00:42:10,862
Not exactly playing hockey, is it?
734
00:42:14,282 --> 00:42:18,036
Thanks, kid. You had my back out there.
735
00:42:18,203 --> 00:42:20,288
I owe you.
736
00:42:25,126 --> 00:42:27,462
Maybe I should take you to the doctor.
737
00:42:27,629 --> 00:42:29,047
What for?
738
00:42:29,214 --> 00:42:32,217
So he can tell me I got
post-concussion syndrome?
739
00:42:32,384 --> 00:42:35,595
One more bad hit and you're done?
740
00:42:35,762 --> 00:42:37,305
It's not fuckin' soccer, Dougie.
741
00:42:37,472 --> 00:42:39,849
I've been hearing that shit for a decade now.
742
00:42:42,269 --> 00:42:44,354
That doesn't sound very good.
743
00:42:47,065 --> 00:42:49,276
You looked mean out there, kiddo.
744
00:42:49,442 --> 00:42:52,028
Young Anders better watch his ass.
745
00:42:59,202 --> 00:43:01,371
Lead these guys! Lead these guys!
746
00:43:01,538 --> 00:43:03,707
What would a leader do?
What would a fuckin' leader do?
747
00:43:03,873 --> 00:43:07,043
Alright! Alright! Listen up!
748
00:43:07,210 --> 00:43:09,379
Captain speaking! Captain time!
749
00:43:09,546 --> 00:43:11,172
Off your fuckin' phone, LaFlamme.
750
00:43:11,339 --> 00:43:12,882
- Get off!
- Turn it off.
751
00:43:13,049 --> 00:43:15,427
You turn the puck over in
the neutral zone one more time
752
00:43:15,594 --> 00:43:17,794
and I'll teach you a fucking
lesson you'll never forget.
753
00:43:17,846 --> 00:43:19,639
- Got it?
- What the fuck you just say?
754
00:43:19,806 --> 00:43:21,683
And you KHL garbage bullshit,
755
00:43:21,850 --> 00:43:25,270
Ukrainian fuck Hockey League
Chernobyl disaster fucks!
756
00:43:25,437 --> 00:43:27,856
You turn that fuckin' puck over one more time
757
00:43:28,023 --> 00:43:29,441
and I'll fuckin' kill both of you!
758
00:43:29,608 --> 00:43:30,984
- And you!
- Yeah?
759
00:43:31,151 --> 00:43:34,487
Fuck, I don't even know. Fuck you! Fuck you!
760
00:43:34,654 --> 00:43:36,114
Hey!
761
00:43:36,281 --> 00:43:37,907
Be nice.
762
00:43:39,618 --> 00:43:41,161
What?
763
00:43:42,579 --> 00:43:46,291
Be nice.
764
00:43:52,422 --> 00:43:56,259
Whoo! Whoo! Fuck, yeah!
765
00:43:56,426 --> 00:43:58,553
That's what I'm talking about! Sports!
766
00:43:58,720 --> 00:44:00,096
You miss fucking Doug Glatt?
767
00:44:00,263 --> 00:44:03,933
You think he gives two
fuckin' shits about you guys?
768
00:44:04,100 --> 00:44:07,854
I care! I fucking care!
We're gonna do this together!
769
00:44:08,021 --> 00:44:11,650
Highlanders on three!
One, two, three! Highlanders!
770
00:44:11,816 --> 00:44:13,610
My line starts!
771
00:44:13,777 --> 00:44:16,321
See? He gets it! He fuckin' gets it!
772
00:44:16,488 --> 00:44:18,406
He smiles, he fuckin' gets it.
773
00:44:18,573 --> 00:44:22,369
Fuck! No! No more fucking candy!
774
00:44:22,535 --> 00:44:24,454
What the fuck?!
775
00:44:24,621 --> 00:44:29,334
Holy shit!
776
00:44:31,336 --> 00:44:32,921
- Highlanders lead Newark...
- Come on!
777
00:44:33,088 --> 00:44:35,465
...1-0, thanks to a goal by Anders Cain.
778
00:44:35,632 --> 00:44:39,010
Anders Cain wants it badly.
Shoves his own teammate aside.
779
00:44:39,177 --> 00:44:40,595
Now the captain awaits.
780
00:44:40,762 --> 00:44:42,722
Cain takes a good look up the ice.
781
00:44:42,889 --> 00:44:44,533
- Down the other end...
- Oh, no, he's not...
782
00:44:44,557 --> 00:44:46,202
...is LaFlamme hovering in the neutral zone.
783
00:44:46,226 --> 00:44:48,019
Cain now works it up. LaFlamme well ahead.
784
00:44:48,186 --> 00:44:49,562
No!
785
00:44:49,729 --> 00:44:51,940
A suicide pass! LaFlamme is decked by Balacco.
786
00:44:52,107 --> 00:44:53,733
- Fuck!
- Fuckin' cunt.
787
00:44:53,900 --> 00:44:56,486
Down on the ice is LaFlamme.
He's spitting blood.
788
00:44:56,653 --> 00:44:59,698
Here's Cain and Stevenson going at the goal.
789
00:44:59,864 --> 00:45:01,449
Anders Cain...
790
00:45:01,616 --> 00:45:03,159
What are you doing?!
791
00:45:03,326 --> 00:45:05,203
...levels both the
Newark goalie and Stevenson.
792
00:45:05,370 --> 00:45:06,788
Fuck me.
793
00:45:06,955 --> 00:45:08,540
Now Cain draws a crowd.
794
00:45:08,707 --> 00:45:11,710
Cain decks one, decks two,
795
00:45:11,876 --> 00:45:14,713
and Cain stood up to the world.
796
00:45:14,879 --> 00:45:17,590
Your kid finally got suspended, okay?
797
00:45:17,757 --> 00:45:19,801
- He's destroying this team.
- What's that?
798
00:45:19,968 --> 00:45:22,721
- You heard me, you little shit.
- Tread lightly, Ron.
799
00:45:22,887 --> 00:45:24,887
Hyrum, did you not see
the same fuckin' hockey game
800
00:45:24,973 --> 00:45:26,349
that I saw last night?
801
00:45:26,516 --> 00:45:28,935
- Did you see that game?
- Yeah. I did. I saw compete.
802
00:45:29,102 --> 00:45:30,812
It was misdirected, but I saw compete.
803
00:45:30,979 --> 00:45:32,355
The dressing room's in the shitter.
804
00:45:32,522 --> 00:45:34,882
It's tighter than a nun's cunt
in there. There's no chatter.
805
00:45:35,024 --> 00:45:36,919
The boys feel like they're
on the chopping block.
806
00:45:36,943 --> 00:45:38,778
They need someone to pull them together,
807
00:45:38,945 --> 00:45:40,822
and time after time after time,
808
00:45:40,989 --> 00:45:42,429
he's proven he's not the fuckin' guy.
809
00:45:42,532 --> 00:45:44,784
Oh, what, so it's my fault
the fucking amateur hour...
810
00:45:44,951 --> 00:45:46,494
Anders.
811
00:45:50,832 --> 00:45:52,375
What about Doug?
812
00:45:52,542 --> 00:45:56,463
- Doug. Doug?
- Maybe I was wrong about him.
813
00:45:56,629 --> 00:45:59,090
I saw him at the shitshow the other night.
814
00:45:59,257 --> 00:46:01,801
- He looked mean.
- What, really?
815
00:46:01,968 --> 00:46:03,344
- Yeah.
- We thought he was done.
816
00:46:03,511 --> 00:46:05,221
Yeah, 'cause I fuckin' made him done.
817
00:46:05,388 --> 00:46:06,848
Alright, alright,
818
00:46:07,015 --> 00:46:10,059
well, then maybe we bring him
back to practice, eh?
819
00:46:10,226 --> 00:46:13,229
- Give him a shot.
- See if he's got what it takes.
820
00:46:13,396 --> 00:46:14,898
But we saw what he did to him,
821
00:46:15,064 --> 00:46:16,709
so what's that dressing room gonna look like
822
00:46:16,733 --> 00:46:18,109
with him and Glatt in it?
823
00:46:18,276 --> 00:46:21,154
- I think we should find out.
- Fuck me!
824
00:46:21,321 --> 00:46:24,532
Fuck you then, 'cause we're doing it.
825
00:46:36,294 --> 00:46:42,008
826
00:46:42,175 --> 00:46:44,928
827
00:46:45,094 --> 00:46:47,722
Oh, my lordy! It's Doug!
828
00:46:49,432 --> 00:46:51,351
Jesus, Stevie, you fell in the garbage!
829
00:46:51,518 --> 00:46:53,686
- I'm okay.
- Welcome back, Dougie!
830
00:46:53,853 --> 00:46:56,231
- Welcome home, Dougie!
- Welcome home, Doug.
831
00:46:56,397 --> 00:46:58,149
Thanks, bud.
832
00:46:59,901 --> 00:47:02,195
- Now we're talking!
- Fuckin' right.
833
00:47:02,362 --> 00:47:04,447
Okay, boys...
834
00:47:06,574 --> 00:47:08,117
...this is a big day.
835
00:47:08,284 --> 00:47:09,964
First off, we're gonna welcome back Dougie.
836
00:47:09,994 --> 00:47:12,163
We're gonna see if he's
fit enough to play, alright?
837
00:47:14,415 --> 00:47:16,209
Thank you, guys.
838
00:47:16,376 --> 00:47:19,212
I'm so happy to be back here
and have a chance to...
839
00:47:20,255 --> 00:47:21,756
...be back here?
840
00:47:21,923 --> 00:47:23,299
That's good.
841
00:47:23,466 --> 00:47:26,886
Okay, I'm so fuckin' excited to tell you this.
842
00:47:27,053 --> 00:47:28,763
Favourite part of the practice for me.
843
00:47:28,930 --> 00:47:32,267
- Puke time. Suicides.
- Let's give her!
844
00:47:32,433 --> 00:47:35,311
- Lace 'em up! Lace 'em up!
- Man of iron.
845
00:47:35,478 --> 00:47:40,567
- Jew of iron.
- Sorry I smell like garbage.
846
00:47:40,733 --> 00:47:43,403
- See you out there.
- So glad to see you, man.
847
00:47:43,570 --> 00:47:46,072
I totally thought you were transitioning.
848
00:47:50,577 --> 00:47:52,120
You're not home.
849
00:47:54,289 --> 00:47:57,000
Your fuckin' jersey, you idiot. You're not home.
850
00:48:06,968 --> 00:48:09,262
You shouldn't have come back, Doug.
851
00:48:11,180 --> 00:48:12,891
You shouldn't have come back.
852
00:48:18,021 --> 00:48:19,898
They gave you my C.
853
00:48:20,064 --> 00:48:24,193
I think you gave me your C, bud.
854
00:48:24,360 --> 00:48:28,406
Captain doesn't cheap shot,
doesn't try to end careers.
855
00:48:29,449 --> 00:48:30,825
You think you're a hockey player.
856
00:48:30,992 --> 00:48:34,078
That's fuckin' funny.
857
00:48:39,334 --> 00:48:44,631
See, Doug, I just do whatever
my team needs me to do.
858
00:48:50,929 --> 00:48:52,680
See you out there, bud.
859
00:48:52,847 --> 00:48:55,475
You look good. Your face looks better.
860
00:48:57,185 --> 00:49:01,439
Okay, lads, some of youse have a little rust.
861
00:49:01,606 --> 00:49:04,692
We're gonna work some of that
rust off right fuckin' now, okay?
862
00:49:04,859 --> 00:49:06,339
We're gonna play some shutdown hockey.
863
00:49:06,402 --> 00:49:07,779
Let's keep it clean, fellas.
864
00:49:07,946 --> 00:49:09,280
You're all on the same team here.
865
00:49:09,447 --> 00:49:11,199
Okay?
866
00:49:13,076 --> 00:49:15,703
- Jesus fuckin' Christ.
- Don't mind me.
867
00:49:15,870 --> 00:49:19,916
We won't. Let's go!
868
00:49:28,341 --> 00:49:30,385
Move your feet, boy! Move your feet!
869
00:49:31,928 --> 00:49:35,181
Move it!
870
00:49:35,348 --> 00:49:37,350
Keep your head up! Keep your head up!
871
00:49:38,434 --> 00:49:41,020
- Oh!
- Goddamn it! Fucking shit...
872
00:49:41,187 --> 00:49:44,857
- Come on!
- Eh?
873
00:49:48,194 --> 00:49:50,113
Nice, Dougie.
874
00:49:50,279 --> 00:49:51,906
- Good job!
- Come on! Help me out!
875
00:49:52,949 --> 00:49:54,575
Yeah!
876
00:49:54,742 --> 00:49:56,786
- Yeah!
- The old boys are lookin' good.
877
00:49:56,953 --> 00:49:58,079
Fuck!
878
00:50:00,873 --> 00:50:02,083
- Nice, Dougie!
- Whoo!
879
00:50:02,250 --> 00:50:04,877
- Fuck!
- Next goal wins.
880
00:50:05,044 --> 00:50:08,214
Fuck 'next goal wins'.
What is this, street hockey?
881
00:50:08,381 --> 00:50:10,675
- Car!
- Let's get 'em, Anders! Hustle!
882
00:50:10,842 --> 00:50:12,969
Let's go! Let's go!
883
00:50:13,136 --> 00:50:14,512
Anders, work!
884
00:50:14,679 --> 00:50:16,639
- They're making you look bad!
- Game on!
885
00:50:16,806 --> 00:50:18,766
Mum's got hot chocolate at our place after.
886
00:50:18,933 --> 00:50:21,394
Loser brings an orange ball from Canadian Tire!
887
00:50:21,561 --> 00:50:22,937
'Next goal wins' is a thing.
888
00:50:23,104 --> 00:50:24,605
That's... that's not just road hockey.
889
00:50:24,772 --> 00:50:26,315
That's... that's... That is a thing.
890
00:50:27,734 --> 00:50:28,985
891
00:50:29,152 --> 00:50:30,528
Hey, hey, hey! Hey!
892
00:50:30,695 --> 00:50:32,613
Come on. You gonna fucking turtle on me?
893
00:50:32,780 --> 00:50:34,407
- Hey!
- Come on, Dougie. Round two.
894
00:50:34,574 --> 00:50:36,242
Puck's at your feet! Play to the whistle!
895
00:50:36,409 --> 00:50:38,369
- Come on, Dougie. Come on.
- Dougie, here!
896
00:50:38,536 --> 00:50:40,747
- Move the puck!
- What the fuck?
897
00:50:41,789 --> 00:50:44,000
Yes!
898
00:50:44,167 --> 00:50:46,753
There you go! Next goal wins it, right?
899
00:50:50,131 --> 00:50:52,216
- Fuck!
- Jesus Christ, man.
900
00:50:54,093 --> 00:50:56,846
Hey, Hyrum, what kind of
marshmallows do you like?
901
00:50:57,013 --> 00:50:59,515
- Go fuck yourself.
- Boys, bring it in.
902
00:50:59,682 --> 00:51:03,269
Better. Good hustle, eh?
903
00:51:03,436 --> 00:51:07,482
Good hustle. Heart.
That's what it takes to win.
904
00:51:07,648 --> 00:51:09,248
You guys are getting first shift tonight.
905
00:51:09,317 --> 00:51:11,652
Belchy, you nut, don't wander.
906
00:51:11,819 --> 00:51:13,654
- You're startin'.
- Fuckin' right, coach.
907
00:51:13,821 --> 00:51:16,616
- It's Canadian fuckin' hockey.
- Okay.
908
00:51:16,783 --> 00:51:18,993
Dougie, welcome back, son.
909
00:51:19,160 --> 00:51:20,536
Welcome back.
910
00:51:20,703 --> 00:51:22,789
- Come on.
- Good stuff, boys!
911
00:51:28,586 --> 00:51:30,129
Doug, where were you?
912
00:51:30,296 --> 00:51:32,465
- They called our names to go in.
- I'm sorry, Eva.
913
00:51:32,632 --> 00:51:35,259
I'll explain when I'm less sweaty.
914
00:51:35,426 --> 00:51:38,930
Hey, Triceratops! That's my favourite dinosaur.
915
00:51:40,098 --> 00:51:42,350
Remember how I keep saying that work is fun
916
00:51:42,517 --> 00:51:44,143
and there's all these documents?
917
00:51:44,310 --> 00:51:45,686
Well, that's, like, only half true,
918
00:51:45,853 --> 00:51:48,689
because it's not fun at all.
919
00:51:48,856 --> 00:51:50,525
I just don't think that the insurance bug
920
00:51:50,691 --> 00:51:53,069
has truly laid its eggs inside of me.
921
00:51:54,779 --> 00:51:56,155
Okay.
922
00:51:56,322 --> 00:52:02,245
So, I mean, who said you had to sell insurance?
923
00:52:02,411 --> 00:52:03,955
I never told you that.
924
00:52:05,373 --> 00:52:08,209
And I only got you those bloody business cards
925
00:52:08,376 --> 00:52:10,294
because I was trying to be cute or some shit.
926
00:52:10,461 --> 00:52:12,964
The Highlanders still need me.
927
00:52:16,134 --> 00:52:20,513
But we're supposed to be
doing this together, like a team.
928
00:52:20,680 --> 00:52:25,309
Neither of us are just making
decisions for ourselves anymore.
929
00:52:25,476 --> 00:52:26,978
A lot of shit affects both of us.
930
00:52:35,653 --> 00:52:39,031
Look at her. Look at what we did.
931
00:52:39,198 --> 00:52:40,198
Yeah.
932
00:52:40,324 --> 00:52:43,953
She looks like a beautiful
tiny mushroom person.
933
00:52:44,120 --> 00:52:46,038
She's so cool.
934
00:52:50,585 --> 00:52:51,961
Just...
935
00:52:52,128 --> 00:52:55,548
It was different watching you
beat the piss out of guys
936
00:52:55,715 --> 00:52:57,091
before I actually knew you.
937
00:52:57,258 --> 00:52:59,969
I mean, I fuckin' loved it, obviously.
938
00:53:00,136 --> 00:53:03,014
Part of what made me
dig you in the first place.
939
00:53:03,181 --> 00:53:07,059
But the fucking very moment
I fell in love with you,
940
00:53:07,226 --> 00:53:09,353
it got scary.
941
00:53:09,520 --> 00:53:14,400
Now you're my husband and we've got...
942
00:53:17,570 --> 00:53:21,782
- This is big shit, Doug.
- I know it is.
943
00:53:21,949 --> 00:53:26,746
I love you, and if you want to do something,
944
00:53:26,913 --> 00:53:29,999
then I'm with you...
945
00:53:31,459 --> 00:53:35,463
...but I can't be scared shitless
every time you go out there.
946
00:53:35,630 --> 00:53:37,423
So, what I mean is,
947
00:53:37,590 --> 00:53:39,634
if you want to be a Highlander again,
948
00:53:39,800 --> 00:53:42,595
then go and be a Highlander again.
949
00:53:42,762 --> 00:53:44,263
I'll support you,
950
00:53:44,430 --> 00:53:47,725
but you have to do one thing for me.
951
00:53:47,892 --> 00:53:50,561
I would do anything for you, Eva.
952
00:53:51,812 --> 00:53:53,856
Don't fight.
953
00:53:55,691 --> 00:53:57,109
What?
954
00:53:57,276 --> 00:54:01,155
I've seen you make hits and kill penalties
955
00:54:01,322 --> 00:54:03,991
and block shots with your face.
956
00:54:05,910 --> 00:54:08,704
I'm trying, but you gotta meet me halfway and...
957
00:54:09,956 --> 00:54:11,540
...and not fight.
958
00:54:15,253 --> 00:54:17,380
You're more than that.
959
00:54:19,131 --> 00:54:23,010
- Okay.
- Thank you, Doug.
960
00:54:24,428 --> 00:54:25,972
Thank you, Eva.
961
00:54:29,892 --> 00:54:33,187
Come on, you can't quit on me now.
962
00:54:33,354 --> 00:54:34,730
What about all our adventures?
963
00:54:34,897 --> 00:54:37,358
Remember that one time
I thought you had a watch?
964
00:54:39,318 --> 00:54:41,153
God, you're just gonna throw that away?
965
00:54:41,320 --> 00:54:43,030
I'm sorry, Bob Forbes.
966
00:54:43,197 --> 00:54:45,616
I don't know anything about documents.
967
00:54:45,783 --> 00:54:47,159
What, do you think I do?
968
00:54:47,326 --> 00:54:48,703
God, somebody gives me a document
969
00:54:48,869 --> 00:54:50,788
and I go, "Mmm, err," give it to another guy.
970
00:54:50,955 --> 00:54:52,581
That's how insurance works!
971
00:54:52,748 --> 00:54:54,750
Goddamn it!
972
00:54:56,919 --> 00:54:59,630
Well, can't say I'm not sad to see you go,
973
00:54:59,797 --> 00:55:02,633
but if you change your mind,
just know you always got a spot
974
00:55:02,800 --> 00:55:05,469
here in the storage shed, Dennis.
975
00:55:06,512 --> 00:55:08,472
He's... he's staying? No, he's going. Shit.
976
00:55:08,639 --> 00:55:10,266
977
00:55:11,517 --> 00:55:14,729
Always driving away the ones you love.
978
00:55:16,147 --> 00:55:17,690
Yeah, that ought to hold.
979
00:55:17,857 --> 00:55:19,650
Jesus Christ.
980
00:55:34,957 --> 00:55:38,169
- Hey. How's your arm?
- Good, thank you.
981
00:55:38,336 --> 00:55:39,879
How's your arm?
982
00:55:41,464 --> 00:55:44,216
Listen, um, everybody's rusty their first game.
983
00:55:44,383 --> 00:55:45,926
It's okay, okay?
984
00:55:51,057 --> 00:55:54,602
What the fuck? Belchy.
985
00:55:54,769 --> 00:55:56,228
Belchy!
986
00:55:56,395 --> 00:55:59,607
We are very much happy you are playing again.
987
00:55:59,774 --> 00:56:01,650
This is our gift to you.
988
00:56:01,817 --> 00:56:03,194
Sandwich.
989
00:56:03,361 --> 00:56:06,072
This is you upon receipt of sandwich.
990
00:56:06,238 --> 00:56:07,865
- Smiley?
- Mm-hmm.
991
00:56:08,032 --> 00:56:11,160
Happy cartoon, huh?
992
00:56:12,370 --> 00:56:14,747
Fuckin' A, man. That feels fuckin' right.
993
00:56:14,914 --> 00:56:16,290
We needed this, man.
994
00:56:16,457 --> 00:56:17,833
You two fuckin' buffoons
995
00:56:18,000 --> 00:56:19,600
are standing there with your giant dicks.
996
00:56:19,710 --> 00:56:21,629
I mean, that's a fuckin' sturgeon, man.
997
00:56:21,796 --> 00:56:23,255
Jesus Christ!
998
00:56:23,422 --> 00:56:25,662
I always think you're gonna
fuckin' prank me or whatever,
999
00:56:25,758 --> 00:56:28,803
or you're gonna say your shit
about my fuckin' mom, which...
1000
00:56:28,969 --> 00:56:32,264
No, no, no, no, no.
We respect your mother now.
1001
00:56:32,431 --> 00:56:35,935
She's becoming very open-minded.
1002
00:56:36,102 --> 00:56:38,396
Yeah, man. Alright.
She's been working on that.
1003
00:56:38,562 --> 00:56:42,400
Big cream pie, pearl fucking necklace...
1004
00:56:42,566 --> 00:56:46,737
Golden showers, double penetration.
1005
00:56:46,904 --> 00:56:48,864
- Uh-huh!
- Double penetration.
1006
00:56:49,031 --> 00:56:51,033
No butt, just vagina.
1007
00:56:51,200 --> 00:56:54,120
- Two penis, one hole.
- Yes.
1008
00:56:54,286 --> 00:56:59,333
Warm, worm kisses deep inside your mother.
1009
00:56:59,500 --> 00:57:02,086
1010
00:57:02,253 --> 00:57:05,548
The fuck is that? Warm worm? Fuck you two, man!
1011
00:57:05,714 --> 00:57:08,175
You understand, we are brothers.
1012
00:57:08,342 --> 00:57:10,636
We power-fuck your mother.
1013
00:57:10,803 --> 00:57:12,843
You know, I'm an idiot
for fucking even trusting you
1014
00:57:12,930 --> 00:57:15,558
for a second, you Ruskie fuckin' pricks!
1015
00:57:15,724 --> 00:57:17,518
The best revenge is living well.
1016
00:57:17,685 --> 00:57:19,728
I'm not stooping to your fuckin' level.
1017
00:57:20,855 --> 00:57:23,315
- The mayonnaise is semen.
- What?
1018
00:57:23,482 --> 00:57:27,611
- Semen.
- You know, ejaculate.
1019
00:57:28,904 --> 00:57:30,948
Doug Glatt is a Highlander once more.
1020
00:57:31,115 --> 00:57:32,783
With just a quarter of the season left,
1021
00:57:32,950 --> 00:57:35,870
Hyrum Cain seems to be trying a hail Mary move
1022
00:57:36,036 --> 00:57:37,997
by bringing back a man known for his fists
1023
00:57:38,164 --> 00:57:39,832
and, frankly, not much else.
1024
00:57:39,999 --> 00:57:40,999
No.
1025
00:57:41,041 --> 00:57:43,711
Considering this will be
Glatt's first hockey game
1026
00:57:43,878 --> 00:57:45,713
since being knocked out by his now teammate,
1027
00:57:45,880 --> 00:57:47,339
the currently suspended Anders Cain,
1028
00:57:47,506 --> 00:57:49,884
this should make for
an interesting locker room dynamic
1029
00:57:50,050 --> 00:57:53,053
and even more awkward Cain family Boxing Day.
1030
00:57:53,220 --> 00:57:56,891
I mean, that household is a fucking disaster.
1031
00:57:57,057 --> 00:57:59,643
- Just read the prompter, man.
- No.
1032
00:57:59,810 --> 00:58:02,688
I say what I want, James,
because I got a pair of balls,
1033
00:58:02,855 --> 00:58:04,231
not two pieces of pussy.
1034
00:58:04,398 --> 00:58:05,900
How long is this gonna happen for?
1035
00:58:06,066 --> 00:58:07,443
For as long as it takes.
1036
00:58:07,610 --> 00:58:10,237
Sports Desk. We'll take as long as it takes.
1037
00:58:12,531 --> 00:58:15,409
Sports Desk. Fuck, yeah.
1038
00:58:16,911 --> 00:58:18,329
- Alright. Okay.
- Ha!
1039
00:58:18,496 --> 00:58:21,540
- Fuck it.
- Off the belly. In the ear!
1040
00:58:21,707 --> 00:58:23,334
- Alright, no.
- Doug 'The Thug' Glatt.
1041
00:58:23,501 --> 00:58:25,669
Doug with that big dick.
1042
00:58:26,962 --> 00:58:29,048
- Too much?
- It's not...
1043
00:58:29,215 --> 00:58:32,885
...the Halifax faithful hoping
'The Thug' can do his part
1044
00:58:33,052 --> 00:58:35,137
to get them back to the play-offs.
1045
00:58:35,304 --> 00:58:37,681
So, the St John's Shamrocks.
1046
00:58:37,848 --> 00:58:39,683
The Shamrocks breaking
out of their own zone.
1047
00:58:39,850 --> 00:58:41,519
Here's the pass up the wing.
1048
00:58:41,685 --> 00:58:42,685
Oh, baby!
1049
00:58:42,770 --> 00:58:44,438
Doug Glatt's return
1050
00:58:44,605 --> 00:58:48,859
continues to electrify
his crowd and his team.
1051
00:58:49,026 --> 00:58:50,986
St John's still with a man advantage.
1052
00:58:51,153 --> 00:58:52,753
LaFlamme getting up, getting ready to go,
1053
00:58:52,821 --> 00:58:55,699
Anders Cain, no help tonight
as he has been suspended.
1054
00:58:57,201 --> 00:58:59,745
Five seconds to go on
the St John's power play,
1055
00:58:59,912 --> 00:59:01,539
and somehow Halifax has been able
1056
00:59:01,705 --> 00:59:03,499
to keep this game tied at zero.
1057
00:59:03,666 --> 00:59:05,209
Now LaFlamme steps out on the ice.
1058
00:59:05,376 --> 00:59:06,585
Halifax with the heat on.
1059
00:59:06,752 --> 00:59:08,170
Carlson looking back,
1060
00:59:08,337 --> 00:59:10,047
takes the puck at the blue line.
1061
00:59:10,214 --> 00:59:14,301
Now Carlson, he's got a cannon!
He winds it up.
1062
00:59:16,303 --> 00:59:19,014
Oh, everyone, check your asses for monkeys.
1063
00:59:19,181 --> 00:59:21,100
Xavier LaFlamme blocking a shot?
1064
00:59:21,267 --> 00:59:23,227
Now we go to Stevenson.
1065
00:59:23,394 --> 00:59:25,354
Stevenson moves down deep into the corner.
1066
00:59:26,397 --> 00:59:28,597
Oh, growing out a moustache,
you little bitch, huh? Huh?
1067
00:59:30,526 --> 00:59:33,487
I'm so exhausted! Gatorade!
1068
00:59:33,654 --> 00:59:37,157
And now Glatt decides,
"Well, I'm a little thirsty."
1069
00:59:37,324 --> 00:59:39,118
Sorry. Pardon. I'm super thirsty.
1070
00:59:39,285 --> 00:59:41,537
Meanwhile, Stevenson comes out of the corner.
1071
00:59:41,704 --> 00:59:44,498
He scores!
1072
00:59:45,541 --> 00:59:48,127
- He took my fuckin' bottle...
- Yeah!
1073
00:59:48,294 --> 00:59:49,920
Well, I suppose there's no rule
1074
00:59:50,087 --> 00:59:52,172
about drinking the opposing team's Gatorade,
1075
00:59:52,339 --> 00:59:55,009
but perhaps after tonight, there should be.
1076
00:59:55,175 --> 00:59:57,219
You stole his Gatorade, man!
1077
00:59:57,386 --> 00:59:59,388
He's so mad!
1078
00:59:59,555 --> 01:00:02,308
Highlanders win thanks to
the unquenchable thirst
1079
01:00:02,474 --> 01:00:04,852
of a man they call 'The Thug'.
1080
01:00:10,107 --> 01:00:12,067
Good for you, kid.
1081
01:00:14,820 --> 01:00:16,822
Good for you.
1082
01:00:19,074 --> 01:00:20,743
Boys,
1083
01:00:20,909 --> 01:00:23,162
got a little heat going now, right?
1084
01:00:23,329 --> 01:00:25,372
So we're all gonna take that heat into Reading
1085
01:00:25,539 --> 01:00:28,000
and we're gonna burn their fuckin' flesh off
1086
01:00:28,167 --> 01:00:30,377
like fuckin' flamethrowers!
1087
01:00:30,544 --> 01:00:31,544
- Sir?
- Yes?
1088
01:00:31,670 --> 01:00:33,047
Okay, for the last time,
1089
01:00:33,213 --> 01:00:37,051
I'm gonna have to ask you to
lower your voice, okay? Just...
1090
01:00:37,217 --> 01:00:38,844
Sweetie, take that for me, would you?
1091
01:00:39,011 --> 01:00:41,411
Uh, no, not in first class,
so I don't take your... anything.
1092
01:00:41,513 --> 01:00:43,158
- Alrighty. Sit down?
- Just have a seat there.
1093
01:00:43,182 --> 01:00:44,975
Yes, sir. That would be wonderful.
1094
01:00:45,142 --> 01:00:48,228
Thank you very much.
And if you could just remain seated.
1095
01:00:48,395 --> 01:00:50,439
Oh for fuck's sake!
1096
01:00:50,606 --> 01:00:53,233
Hey, Belchy!
1097
01:00:53,400 --> 01:00:57,821
Come see! This toilet
looks just like your mother.
1098
01:00:57,988 --> 01:01:01,075
Only markedly less toilet-like.
1099
01:01:02,785 --> 01:01:06,246
Oh, my God, you guys are...
Get the fuck out of here, man.
1100
01:01:06,413 --> 01:01:08,832
Disgusting.
1101
01:01:08,999 --> 01:01:11,710
Hey. I'm not done.
1102
01:01:11,877 --> 01:01:13,754
- What...
- No.
1103
01:01:14,797 --> 01:01:16,256
She said no.
1104
01:01:16,423 --> 01:01:18,258
We're gonna skate in there
1105
01:01:18,425 --> 01:01:22,012
and we're gonna show those
translucent Rust Belt weirdos
1106
01:01:22,179 --> 01:01:23,597
how we play hock...
1107
01:01:23,764 --> 01:01:24,765
I swear.
1108
01:01:24,932 --> 01:01:26,308
...north of the border.
1109
01:01:26,475 --> 01:01:29,228
Highlanders.
1110
01:01:29,395 --> 01:01:31,355
Highlanders.
1111
01:01:31,522 --> 01:01:34,733
Highlanders. Highlanders.
1112
01:01:34,900 --> 01:01:37,152
Okay, but that is still making us uncomfortable.
1113
01:01:37,319 --> 01:01:41,281
Highlanders. Highlanders. Highlanders.
1114
01:01:41,448 --> 01:01:45,703
- Highlanders. Highlanders.
- Wow, it smells like dick.
1115
01:01:45,869 --> 01:01:49,331
Highlanders. Highlanders. Highlanders.
1116
01:01:49,498 --> 01:01:50,874
Stay in school.
1117
01:01:51,041 --> 01:01:52,418
Highlanders.
1118
01:01:52,584 --> 01:01:53,961
Three minutes left in the third
1119
01:01:54,128 --> 01:01:56,922
and the Highlanders' hot streak
is in danger of ending,
1120
01:01:57,089 --> 01:01:59,049
as they trail the Wolfdogs 3 to 2.
1121
01:01:59,216 --> 01:02:00,926
A win tonight would see them
1122
01:02:01,093 --> 01:02:02,845
just one spot outside play-offs contention.
1123
01:02:03,011 --> 01:02:05,305
All my uncles are dead!
1124
01:02:05,472 --> 01:02:07,057
Anders Cain looks in front, turns...
1125
01:02:07,224 --> 01:02:09,143
Oh, Waxman's...
1126
01:02:09,309 --> 01:02:13,355
Cain scores! And it's tied 3-3.
1127
01:02:13,522 --> 01:02:17,109
Great goal by Anders Cain
to keep the dream alive.
1128
01:02:17,276 --> 01:02:18,920
They're gonna be throwing everything at us now
1129
01:02:18,944 --> 01:02:20,446
but the kitchen sink.
1130
01:02:20,612 --> 01:02:22,072
LaFlamme, do what you did last game.
1131
01:02:22,239 --> 01:02:24,575
Stevesy, take his lead.
1132
01:02:24,742 --> 01:02:26,577
Yeah, yeah. Dougie, listen to me.
1133
01:02:26,744 --> 01:02:29,025
You watch their backs,
keep your head in the fuckin' game.
1134
01:02:29,121 --> 01:02:31,206
Handle big man. You see him?
Send him a message.
1135
01:02:31,373 --> 01:02:33,250
Wake him up, Doug. Go, go, go.
1136
01:02:33,417 --> 01:02:35,669
Don't go starting shit you can't finish.
1137
01:02:35,836 --> 01:02:38,630
Coach Ronnie Hortense
had a few words for Doug Glatt
1138
01:02:38,797 --> 01:02:41,049
who hasn't fought since
he came back two weeks ago,
1139
01:02:41,216 --> 01:02:44,136
and he goes straight toward Totan.
1140
01:02:44,303 --> 01:02:46,305
1141
01:02:46,472 --> 01:02:49,183
You're so enormous.
1142
01:02:49,349 --> 01:02:50,642
1143
01:02:52,269 --> 01:02:55,105
Off the faceoff, the puck goes
back into the Wolfdog zone.
1144
01:02:55,272 --> 01:02:57,566
Now it's sent off to centre ice,
turned over by LaFlamme.
1145
01:02:57,733 --> 01:02:59,610
LaFlamme looks across, finds Stevenson.
1146
01:02:59,777 --> 01:03:02,529
Stevenson dumps it deep
into the Wolfdog territory.
1147
01:03:02,696 --> 01:03:04,156
The puck goes around now to Totan.
1148
01:03:04,323 --> 01:03:06,074
Here we go!
1149
01:03:06,241 --> 01:03:09,745
Here comes Glatt right at Totan!
1150
01:03:09,912 --> 01:03:11,914
Oh, and he misses completely!
1151
01:03:12,080 --> 01:03:13,332
Fuck. Shit.
1152
01:03:13,499 --> 01:03:15,959
It looks like he's in pain on his right side.
1153
01:03:17,169 --> 01:03:18,889
Starting the other way, the Reading Wolfdogs
1154
01:03:19,046 --> 01:03:21,423
with an opportunity for the go-ahead goal.
1155
01:03:21,590 --> 01:03:23,926
The puck is brought in across the blue line.
1156
01:03:25,093 --> 01:03:27,679
- He scores!
- Fuck!
1157
01:03:27,846 --> 01:03:29,348
- Reading win!
- Fuck!
1158
01:03:29,515 --> 01:03:31,391
And with just 10 games left in the season,
1159
01:03:31,558 --> 01:03:33,352
the Highlanders seem to have found a way
1160
01:03:33,519 --> 01:03:36,146
to rescue defeat from the jaws of victory.
1161
01:03:36,313 --> 01:03:37,689
Way to go, Dougie!
1162
01:03:37,856 --> 01:03:39,733
Come on, Doug.
1163
01:03:40,859 --> 01:03:43,987
I don't wanna hear it.
Let's go. Let's fuckin' go.
1164
01:03:44,154 --> 01:03:45,781
Beth! Beth, get in the car.
1165
01:03:45,948 --> 01:03:48,492
You better not have drank milk today,
you fuckin' lactose...
1166
01:03:48,659 --> 01:03:50,202
Come on!
1167
01:03:54,206 --> 01:03:57,376
- Did you watch the game?
- Yeah.
1168
01:03:59,419 --> 01:04:01,713
You said it could be scary
watching me out there.
1169
01:04:01,880 --> 01:04:03,549
Was it scary?
1170
01:04:04,842 --> 01:04:07,094
I mean, I don't like watching you get hurt,
1171
01:04:07,261 --> 01:04:09,346
so, yeah, a little.
1172
01:04:10,597 --> 01:04:11,974
- Ah!
- Oh, God! Jesus!
1173
01:04:12,140 --> 01:04:13,892
- Are you okay?
- Yeah.
1174
01:04:18,939 --> 01:04:21,316
M-Maybe you shouldn't watch the next one.
1175
01:04:23,527 --> 01:04:26,822
Yeah. Alright.
1176
01:04:26,989 --> 01:04:31,076
1177
01:04:31,243 --> 01:04:35,289
1178
01:04:37,749 --> 01:04:39,585
Halfway through the third,
1179
01:04:39,751 --> 01:04:41,729
the Highlanders are fighting
for their post-season lives
1180
01:04:41,753 --> 01:04:43,422
on fan appreciation night.
1181
01:04:43,589 --> 01:04:45,509
- A shot blocked by LaFlamme.
- Attaboy, Flammer!
1182
01:04:45,591 --> 01:04:47,217
What a contribution he's made.
1183
01:04:47,384 --> 01:04:49,428
Now LaFlamme sees Walters coming.
1184
01:04:49,595 --> 01:04:53,056
And Walters sucker-punched
him, but he gets up.
1185
01:04:53,223 --> 01:04:55,851
- He appears to be alright.
- Lift your fuckin' arm, ref!
1186
01:04:56,018 --> 01:04:58,270
McBain player Walters
is sent to the penalty box.
1187
01:04:59,771 --> 01:05:01,857
And he is none too impressed.
1188
01:05:06,445 --> 01:05:08,447
- Fuck!
- You okay?
1189
01:05:08,614 --> 01:05:10,365
Yeah, I'm alright. Thanks.
1190
01:05:10,532 --> 01:05:12,910
Okay, now we're gonna take
this fuckin' power play,
1191
01:05:13,076 --> 01:05:15,054
and we're gonna shove it up
their fuckin' sphincters!
1192
01:05:15,078 --> 01:05:16,288
No K-Y.
1193
01:05:16,455 --> 01:05:17,873
And when we're done with that,
1194
01:05:18,040 --> 01:05:21,043
and that ugly piece of shit
gets out of that fuckin' box,
1195
01:05:21,209 --> 01:05:23,086
we'll give 'em a piece of our mind, okay?
1196
01:05:23,253 --> 01:05:26,340
I can do that, sir. I can give 'em
a piece of all our minds.
1197
01:05:26,506 --> 01:05:29,718
No, he fuckin' can't. His arm's all fucked up.
1198
01:05:29,885 --> 01:05:31,637
I'm fine. I can do this.
1199
01:05:31,803 --> 01:05:33,805
You can't fuckin' fight anybody.
1200
01:05:33,972 --> 01:05:36,475
Jesus Christ, boys. What... what's going on?
1201
01:05:36,642 --> 01:05:40,020
Not now, kiddo. Not now.
1202
01:05:42,731 --> 01:05:45,484
Anders Cain is coming right across...
1203
01:05:45,651 --> 01:05:47,277
- Yeah? You wanna go?
- Yeah, come on.
1204
01:05:47,444 --> 01:05:48,820
Yeah, anytime, tough guy!
1205
01:05:48,987 --> 01:05:50,447
I'll fuckin' go right on
1206
01:05:50,614 --> 01:05:52,258
and knock your fuckin' teeth down your throat.
1207
01:05:52,282 --> 01:05:53,659
- Come on!
- Yeah, bring it on!
1208
01:05:53,825 --> 01:05:56,025
I'll tear your fuckin' head off
like a cured meat stick!
1209
01:05:56,161 --> 01:05:58,201
- Stevesy, you're up.
- You're a fuckin' meat stick!
1210
01:05:58,330 --> 01:06:00,916
And now there's action
over at the Highlander bench.
1211
01:06:01,083 --> 01:06:02,626
- And here comes Doug Glatt.
- Glatt!
1212
01:06:02,793 --> 01:06:04,169
- Hortense calls him back.
- Glatt!
1213
01:06:04,336 --> 01:06:05,796
- Get back here!
- Uh-oh!
1214
01:06:05,963 --> 01:06:09,383
We may finally see 'The Thug'
drop his gloves after all.
1215
01:06:09,549 --> 01:06:11,301
Anytime. Oh, you too?
1216
01:06:11,468 --> 01:06:12,844
What the fuck are you doing here?
1217
01:06:13,011 --> 01:06:14,656
- What are you doing here?
- I'm here to...
1218
01:06:14,680 --> 01:06:16,723
And now both Glatt and
Cain push and shove.
1219
01:06:16,890 --> 01:06:18,558
What the fuck do you mean, you're here?
1220
01:06:18,725 --> 01:06:20,978
- I'll fuck both you guys up!
- It's mine!
1221
01:06:21,144 --> 01:06:22,144
Whoa! Fuck!
1222
01:06:22,270 --> 01:06:24,648
And down goes Cain with Glatt on top!
1223
01:06:24,815 --> 01:06:26,608
- What am I lookin' at?
- Fuck!
1224
01:06:26,775 --> 01:06:28,986
- What the fuck is this?!
- I don't know. I don't know.
1225
01:06:29,152 --> 01:06:31,738
I don't even wanna fight anymore.
You killed the mood.
1226
01:06:31,905 --> 01:06:33,824
Dougie, why are you dry-humping Anders?
1227
01:06:33,991 --> 01:06:36,076
- Get off me!
- I'm trying! I don't want this!
1228
01:06:36,243 --> 01:06:38,829
You're on the same fucking team, man!
1229
01:06:38,996 --> 01:06:41,665
Fuck, this is horrible!
This is fucking horrible!
1230
01:06:41,832 --> 01:06:43,250
- It is!
- Fuck!
1231
01:06:43,417 --> 01:06:44,417
It is.
1232
01:06:44,543 --> 01:06:47,462
I would like to remind fans
that, should they still desire,
1233
01:06:47,629 --> 01:06:49,315
they can meet the
Highlanders in person tonight
1234
01:06:49,339 --> 01:06:51,967
at the Corktown Pub
for fan appreciation night.
1235
01:06:52,134 --> 01:06:56,972
Doug! Doug! Doug! Doug!
1236
01:06:57,139 --> 01:07:00,726
Anders, you fuckin' suck! We fuckin' hate you!
1237
01:07:00,892 --> 01:07:02,936
Anders, you piece of fuckin' shit!
1238
01:07:03,103 --> 01:07:05,856
I know it. I fucking know it.
1239
01:07:06,023 --> 01:07:07,524
What the fuck is wrong with you now?
1240
01:07:07,691 --> 01:07:09,109
You know it too.
1241
01:07:09,276 --> 01:07:11,319
- I beat the shit...
- Take it easy.
1242
01:07:11,486 --> 01:07:13,006
- ...out of Doug Glatt.
- Take it easy.
1243
01:07:13,030 --> 01:07:15,490
You fucking take it easy!
I fucking destroyed him!
1244
01:07:15,657 --> 01:07:17,417
- Calm down.
- Get your fucking hands off me!
1245
01:07:17,534 --> 01:07:19,119
- Hey!
- Anders...
1246
01:07:22,164 --> 01:07:23,915
I beat you.
1247
01:07:25,584 --> 01:07:27,169
Don't look at them, you dumb fuck.
1248
01:07:27,335 --> 01:07:29,212
- Look at me.
- Anders!
1249
01:07:29,379 --> 01:07:33,925
I am here now. Me.
Right fucking in front of you!
1250
01:07:34,092 --> 01:07:36,261
Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey!
1251
01:07:36,428 --> 01:07:38,221
- Attaboy, Doug.
- Doug...
1252
01:07:38,388 --> 01:07:40,474
That's enough!
1253
01:07:40,640 --> 01:07:44,186
That's it. Come on.
1254
01:07:44,352 --> 01:07:47,564
- I'm fine. I'm fucking fine!
- Good. Chill out, man.
1255
01:07:47,731 --> 01:07:49,483
Okay? Just breathe.
1256
01:07:52,110 --> 01:07:54,362
- That's enough!
- Come on, Doug!
1257
01:07:56,073 --> 01:07:58,533
- God!
- Anders, it's over. It's over.
1258
01:07:58,700 --> 01:08:01,661
Get out. Walk him out.
1259
01:08:05,916 --> 01:08:08,418
Early reports coming in
of a bar brawl tonight
1260
01:08:08,585 --> 01:08:10,754
at a popular Halifax Highlanders hang-out,
1261
01:08:10,921 --> 01:08:13,590
allegedly involving
the Highlanders themselves
1262
01:08:13,757 --> 01:08:15,884
in what could be just another example
1263
01:08:16,051 --> 01:08:18,053
of violence dogging the team.
1264
01:08:18,220 --> 01:08:19,596
This coming just weeks after
1265
01:08:19,763 --> 01:08:21,640
controversial hockey fighting competition
1266
01:08:21,807 --> 01:08:23,892
Bruised and Battered
held its most recent event
1267
01:08:24,059 --> 01:08:27,687
at the Highlanders' home barn,
the Halifax MetroCentre.
1268
01:08:27,854 --> 01:08:30,440
With two must-win games left to play
1269
01:08:30,607 --> 01:08:32,484
and Cain and Glatt
each serving suspensions,
1270
01:08:32,651 --> 01:08:34,027
one can't help but wonder
1271
01:08:34,194 --> 01:08:38,281
if GM Hyrum Cain has
any more tricks up his sleeve.
1272
01:08:40,826 --> 01:08:42,744
You broke your promise.
1273
01:08:42,911 --> 01:08:45,038
I'm scared.
1274
01:08:45,205 --> 01:08:47,666
I never felt that before.
1275
01:08:49,251 --> 01:08:50,627
He's wearing my C.
1276
01:08:50,794 --> 01:08:53,964
Are you fucking kidding me?
That's the best you can do?
1277
01:08:54,131 --> 01:08:57,843
I gave up stuff I like doing too.
1278
01:08:58,009 --> 01:09:00,220
It's different. You've never had a team.
1279
01:09:02,973 --> 01:09:04,599
Yeah.
1280
01:09:04,766 --> 01:09:07,144
Yeah, maybe you're right.
Maybe... maybe I never did.
1281
01:09:07,310 --> 01:09:09,896
I can still do what I'm supposed
to do. I can still fight.
1282
01:09:10,063 --> 01:09:11,439
I guess that's the fucking problem.
1283
01:09:11,606 --> 01:09:12,607
Eva...
1284
01:09:12,774 --> 01:09:14,359
And yet the worst part is
1285
01:09:14,526 --> 01:09:18,280
you're making me into this
fuckin' naggy housewife.
1286
01:09:18,446 --> 01:09:22,826
Do you think I wanna be
fucking worrying about you?
1287
01:09:22,993 --> 01:09:25,745
You think I want to be giving you shit?
1288
01:09:25,912 --> 01:09:27,998
I don't. This isn't who I am.
1289
01:09:28,165 --> 01:09:30,667
Eva, please. Where are you going?
1290
01:09:30,834 --> 01:09:33,170
I'm not going anywhere.
1291
01:09:40,760 --> 01:09:42,637
I eat this soup.
1292
01:09:44,097 --> 01:09:46,766
Yes, I know. That's why I...
1293
01:09:51,313 --> 01:09:53,899
I just need some time, Doug.
1294
01:10:04,784 --> 01:10:08,580
Dad, I'm fuckin' sorry, okay?
1295
01:10:08,747 --> 01:10:11,208
I'm sorry. I fuck... I-I fucked up.
1296
01:10:13,919 --> 01:10:15,295
Fuck.
1297
01:10:15,462 --> 01:10:17,088
I wanna win. I wanna...
1298
01:10:17,255 --> 01:10:19,216
Your contract's been terminated.
1299
01:10:19,382 --> 01:10:22,010
Uh... I'm sorry. What?
1300
01:10:22,177 --> 01:10:24,012
You're on a flight at 10:00pm tonight.
1301
01:10:31,811 --> 01:10:33,897
No?
1302
01:10:39,444 --> 01:10:41,905
What are you doing?
1303
01:10:42,072 --> 01:10:44,324
Get the fuck out of my face.
1304
01:10:45,742 --> 01:10:47,869
- You wanna swing at me?
- You wanna swing at me?
1305
01:10:56,461 --> 01:10:58,255
You're a fucking pussy.
1306
01:11:15,855 --> 01:11:18,608
I-I'm just saying,
1307
01:11:18,775 --> 01:11:21,903
you're pissed at Doug
because he's a hockey player
1308
01:11:22,070 --> 01:11:24,072
and he wants to play hockey.
1309
01:11:24,239 --> 01:11:28,159
He was fucking bare-knuckle
prize-fighting too. Jesus!
1310
01:11:28,326 --> 01:11:30,870
Whose side are you on?
1311
01:11:31,037 --> 01:11:33,790
We both agreed to do this
and we both gave shit up.
1312
01:11:33,957 --> 01:11:35,333
That's what growing up is.
1313
01:11:35,500 --> 01:11:38,336
I-I had shit that I liked doing too.
1314
01:11:38,503 --> 01:11:41,256
Jägerbombs?
1315
01:11:41,423 --> 01:11:43,883
Look, I know you sacrificed things.
1316
01:11:44,050 --> 01:11:47,012
I mean, you have a fucking baby
growing in your belly. I get it.
1317
01:11:47,178 --> 01:11:52,517
I just... I think that Doug's team
is more than just hockey,
1318
01:11:52,684 --> 01:11:54,227
you know?
1319
01:11:56,938 --> 01:11:59,316
More than a team, even.
1320
01:12:08,575 --> 01:12:10,410
Highlanders GM Hyrum Cain
1321
01:12:10,577 --> 01:12:11,953
confirming that Anders Cain
1322
01:12:12,120 --> 01:12:13,538
has been released from his contract.
1323
01:12:13,705 --> 01:12:16,166
Let this be a lesson to everyone out there.
1324
01:12:16,333 --> 01:12:18,710
Your father will break your heart,
1325
01:12:18,877 --> 01:12:20,879
and then he'll shove it
down your fuckin' throat,
1326
01:12:21,046 --> 01:12:23,673
pull it out your ass,
put it right back in your chest.
1327
01:12:23,840 --> 01:12:27,135
No word on whether
Hyrum Cain plans to replace Anders
1328
01:12:27,302 --> 01:12:30,055
as the Highlanders round out
their season with must-win games
1329
01:12:30,221 --> 01:12:31,765
at home against the Lovell Kings
1330
01:12:31,931 --> 01:12:35,769
and Anders' old team, the Reading Wolfdogs.
1331
01:12:52,452 --> 01:12:55,413
Stevesy, Legs, Geno,
you know what you need to do.
1332
01:12:55,580 --> 01:12:57,916
Eat up minutes. Grind the shit out of them.
1333
01:12:58,083 --> 01:13:00,001
Make them fuck up.
1334
01:13:00,168 --> 01:13:03,546
Tonight, we need to play fucking hard.
1335
01:13:03,713 --> 01:13:05,215
- Right, boys?
- Yeah.
1336
01:13:05,382 --> 01:13:07,258
- Alright, boys?!
- Yeah!
1337
01:13:07,425 --> 01:13:09,094
Let's fucking do this.
1338
01:13:09,260 --> 01:13:11,012
So, you pussies playing hockey or what?
1339
01:13:12,889 --> 01:13:14,265
Wow.
1340
01:13:16,976 --> 01:13:18,812
I messed up, Pat.
1341
01:13:18,978 --> 01:13:22,357
You know, I really like
living with you in the motel,
1342
01:13:22,524 --> 01:13:24,317
but I just kind of wanna go home now.
1343
01:13:24,484 --> 01:13:26,945
- Yeah, no, I-I get that.
- It's, uh...
1344
01:13:27,112 --> 01:13:28,613
It's definitely not the Ritz,
1345
01:13:28,780 --> 01:13:31,616
but so long as Sherilynn owns it,
it's a bed and it's free,
1346
01:13:31,783 --> 01:13:34,202
thanks to that deal I cut with her.
1347
01:13:34,369 --> 01:13:35,787
What kind of deal?
1348
01:13:35,954 --> 01:13:38,164
Fucking the shit out of her constantly.
1349
01:13:38,331 --> 01:13:39,833
Your cousin Sherilynn?
1350
01:13:39,999 --> 01:13:43,169
I don't think I'm the only dude she's fuckin',
1351
01:13:43,336 --> 01:13:45,880
but then she's not the only dude I'm fuckin'.
1352
01:13:51,261 --> 01:13:53,138
Eva? Hello?
1353
01:13:53,304 --> 01:13:55,140
Uh, hey. Doug, um...
1354
01:13:55,306 --> 01:13:58,101
Eva, hello! It's me, Doug Glatt.
1355
01:13:58,268 --> 01:14:00,228
Uh, Doug, where are you?
1356
01:14:00,395 --> 01:14:02,730
I'm sorry I broke my promise.
1357
01:14:03,940 --> 01:14:07,318
I shouldn't have done that,
because we're a team.
1358
01:14:07,485 --> 01:14:09,571
I'm so in love with you.
1359
01:14:09,737 --> 01:14:11,865
We're gonna have a family, and I swear...
1360
01:14:12,031 --> 01:14:14,325
Uh, Doug, my water broke.
1361
01:14:14,492 --> 01:14:17,454
It's okay. I can just buy you
another one at the gas station.
1362
01:14:17,620 --> 01:14:19,998
No, no! My water broke!
1363
01:14:20,165 --> 01:14:23,084
The baby, uh... The baby's coming.
1364
01:14:23,251 --> 01:14:24,251
What?
1365
01:14:24,335 --> 01:14:27,005
What? What? What? What? What? What?
1366
01:14:27,172 --> 01:14:29,215
What? What? Now? Wait. What? What?
1367
01:14:29,382 --> 01:14:31,634
Mary's at the store...
at the store, so I'm all alone.
1368
01:14:31,801 --> 01:14:35,221
No, you're not. Like the baby,
I'm also coming now.
1369
01:14:35,388 --> 01:14:37,056
Okay. Okay.
1370
01:14:37,223 --> 01:14:38,975
Holy fucking cunt balls!
1371
01:14:39,142 --> 01:14:41,102
- It's happening!
- Keep your eyes on the road.
1372
01:14:41,269 --> 01:14:43,021
Oh, yeah. So sorry.
So sorry. So sorry.
1373
01:14:43,188 --> 01:14:44,814
But, Eva, I just gotta tell you,
1374
01:14:44,981 --> 01:14:47,317
you, my dear, are gonna look fucking radiant
1375
01:14:47,484 --> 01:14:48,860
during childbirth.
1376
01:14:49,027 --> 01:14:50,403
I am so sorry.
1377
01:14:50,570 --> 01:14:52,906
From now on, whatever we do,
we do as a team, okay?
1378
01:14:53,072 --> 01:14:54,824
You know, there's just this natural beauty
1379
01:14:54,991 --> 01:14:56,576
that comes from such a violent act,
1380
01:14:56,743 --> 01:14:58,912
the blood and the fucking pussy ripping open.
1381
01:14:59,078 --> 01:15:00,455
Yeah, I'm gonna be the best husband
1382
01:15:00,622 --> 01:15:02,207
and the best father I can be.
1383
01:15:02,373 --> 01:15:03,791
I'll just say it, to me, no woman,
1384
01:15:03,958 --> 01:15:05,335
no fuckin' woman is more beautiful
1385
01:15:05,502 --> 01:15:06,878
than when she's giving birth.
1386
01:15:07,045 --> 01:15:08,421
Could we, uh... Guys, that's great.
1387
01:15:08,588 --> 01:15:10,131
Could we have no talking for a bit?
1388
01:15:10,298 --> 01:15:11,966
Yeah. Of course. Whatever you need.
1389
01:15:12,133 --> 01:15:13,510
Hey! Goddamn it!
1390
01:15:13,676 --> 01:15:16,804
What the fuck? What, is
everyone in this city Chinese?
1391
01:15:16,971 --> 01:15:19,599
Oh, no! Down goes Stevenson!
1392
01:15:19,766 --> 01:15:21,184
Jesus Christ!
1393
01:15:21,351 --> 01:15:23,561
Come on! This is not how
we kill a fucking penalty!
1394
01:15:23,728 --> 01:15:25,408
Come on, Stevesy! You're good, you're good.
1395
01:15:25,522 --> 01:15:27,524
LaFlamme, come on. Come on. Good, get out.
1396
01:15:27,690 --> 01:15:29,067
- Watch the point!
- Sit down.
1397
01:15:29,234 --> 01:15:32,570
Rest that fuckin' ass. Where the fuck is he?
1398
01:15:32,737 --> 01:15:35,114
Hortense keeps looking over
toward the dressing room.
1399
01:15:35,281 --> 01:15:37,742
Breathe, Eva, breathe.
1400
01:15:37,909 --> 01:15:39,911
- Okay?
- Okay.
1401
01:15:40,078 --> 01:15:43,248
Deep, slow breaths. Breathe, Eva. Breathe.
1402
01:15:49,128 --> 01:15:50,630
Lovell and Halifax,
1403
01:15:50,797 --> 01:15:52,924
now LaFlamme goes after
the puck in the corner.
1404
01:15:53,091 --> 01:15:54,842
He takes it in behind the... Here it comes!
1405
01:15:55,009 --> 01:15:57,845
Oh! It's... Oh! And down goes LaFlamme.
1406
01:15:58,012 --> 01:16:01,266
Now Owens is bumped by... Ross Rhea?
1407
01:16:01,432 --> 01:16:04,519
- Nice hit, eh?
- Better late than never.
1408
01:16:04,686 --> 01:16:06,312
Ross Rhea is back!
1409
01:16:07,772 --> 01:16:10,233
One last big push. Can you do that for me, Eva?
1410
01:16:10,400 --> 01:16:12,068
He's back as a Highlander!
1411
01:16:12,235 --> 01:16:14,320
You know, son, generally, it's polite to ask.
1412
01:16:14,487 --> 01:16:17,115
Go watch some curling and get
a fucking dye job, you old man.
1413
01:16:17,282 --> 01:16:18,449
Fuck you.
1414
01:16:18,616 --> 01:16:20,118
- Come on, Eva.
- That's it. Okay, Eva.
1415
01:16:20,285 --> 01:16:22,787
Home stretch.
1416
01:16:22,954 --> 01:16:25,915
Ross Rhea fires that patented right...
1417
01:16:35,133 --> 01:16:37,135
- We thought he was done!
- Old man, eh?
1418
01:16:37,302 --> 01:16:38,928
And he's back in style.
1419
01:16:41,973 --> 01:16:46,978
1420
01:16:49,314 --> 01:16:52,150
Pat...
1421
01:17:01,951 --> 01:17:04,662
Hey, hey, hey!
1422
01:17:04,829 --> 01:17:06,873
Yeah!
1423
01:17:13,421 --> 01:17:14,922
Nice shot, man.
1424
01:17:15,089 --> 01:17:17,383
Let me know if you're not gonna keep it, okay?
1425
01:17:17,550 --> 01:17:20,094
- Yeah, we're gonna keep it.
- Let me know.
1426
01:17:21,888 --> 01:17:24,307
Fuckin' weirdo.
1427
01:17:24,474 --> 01:17:26,225
Everyone okay in there?
1428
01:17:26,392 --> 01:17:29,187
Everybody's great.
1429
01:17:29,354 --> 01:17:31,481
Welcome to the Highlanders.
1430
01:17:32,690 --> 01:17:35,151
Looks like I'm not done after all, eh?
1431
01:17:36,319 --> 01:17:37,904
Mazel tov, kiddo.
1432
01:17:39,447 --> 01:17:41,532
Hey!
1433
01:17:41,699 --> 01:17:46,496
A dick explodes, a baby is made
and a father is born.
1434
01:17:50,750 --> 01:17:52,377
I love you.
1435
01:17:55,046 --> 01:17:56,464
All these kisses.
1436
01:17:56,631 --> 01:18:00,468
- I will love your baby.
- Thank you so much.
1437
01:18:00,635 --> 01:18:02,220
That's so nice.
1438
01:18:02,387 --> 01:18:05,098
I'm a great babysitter,
so I... Not that you...
1439
01:18:05,264 --> 01:18:06,808
Oh, okay.
1440
01:18:09,977 --> 01:18:12,021
You have my back.
1441
01:18:12,188 --> 01:18:14,315
You have since we met,
1442
01:18:14,482 --> 01:18:18,569
and you need to know I'll always have yours.
1443
01:18:19,946 --> 01:18:21,656
Something for the baby.
1444
01:18:32,625 --> 01:18:35,128
It's official. It's official.
1445
01:18:35,294 --> 01:18:37,338
- Go, Dougie.
- You go, Dougie.
1446
01:18:38,631 --> 01:18:41,426
I love you, buddy.
1447
01:18:43,511 --> 01:18:45,722
- Way to go, Dougie!
- Good boy!
1448
01:18:52,895 --> 01:18:55,606
...Doug.
1449
01:18:55,773 --> 01:18:58,985
Thank you.
1450
01:19:01,946 --> 01:19:04,031
I don't know who he is.
1451
01:19:09,662 --> 01:19:12,123
I love you, Eva.
1452
01:19:12,290 --> 01:19:15,126
Mm. I love you too, Doug.
1453
01:19:16,586 --> 01:19:20,506
1454
01:19:20,673 --> 01:19:22,800
Damn!
1455
01:19:22,967 --> 01:19:26,012
I'm high as fuckin' balls.
1456
01:19:26,179 --> 01:19:28,431
Just big ol' balls.
1457
01:19:28,598 --> 01:19:33,019
PS, fuckin' pushing a baby
out your vagina blows hard.
1458
01:19:33,186 --> 01:19:35,354
I know.
1459
01:19:36,481 --> 01:19:38,900
But you were here.
1460
01:19:40,985 --> 01:19:43,446
I needed you and you were here.
1461
01:19:45,865 --> 01:19:48,451
It's the same shit, Doug.
1462
01:19:49,994 --> 01:19:52,038
It's the same shit that brought you here
1463
01:19:52,205 --> 01:19:55,708
is the shit that needs you to be out there.
1464
01:19:57,919 --> 01:19:59,879
They need you too.
1465
01:20:01,923 --> 01:20:04,133
Highlanders need you.
1466
01:20:07,386 --> 01:20:11,349
Doug, you need to be out there.
1467
01:20:15,311 --> 01:20:17,647
This is it. The last game of the season.
1468
01:20:17,814 --> 01:20:19,524
The Highlanders need one more win
1469
01:20:19,690 --> 01:20:22,276
after their gutsy 2-1 victory over Lovell.
1470
01:20:22,443 --> 01:20:23,986
And now, tonight,
1471
01:20:24,153 --> 01:20:26,364
their entire season hangs on this one last game,
1472
01:20:26,531 --> 01:20:28,366
which should be a doozy
1473
01:20:28,533 --> 01:20:30,785
as it marks Cain's return
to the Halifax MetroCentre
1474
01:20:30,952 --> 01:20:34,121
in his first game back since
re-signing with the Wolfdogs.
1475
01:20:34,288 --> 01:20:35,768
Any message for your former teammates?
1476
01:20:35,873 --> 01:20:37,166
Watch your back.
1477
01:20:37,333 --> 01:20:41,254
- Cain's gonna be out there.
- Fuck Cain.
1478
01:20:41,420 --> 01:20:44,131
The shape your shoulder's in, you tweak it,
1479
01:20:44,298 --> 01:20:46,592
you throw one heavy punch with that right,
1480
01:20:46,759 --> 01:20:48,928
that's your career fucked for good.
1481
01:20:49,095 --> 01:20:50,763
I need to protect my team.
1482
01:20:50,930 --> 01:20:53,182
We're having a very busy night here.
1483
01:20:56,519 --> 01:21:01,858
Xavier, you've been whatever
this team has needed you to be.
1484
01:21:02,024 --> 01:21:04,735
You've worked, you've bled.
1485
01:21:07,029 --> 01:21:08,990
I, uh...
1486
01:21:09,156 --> 01:21:11,701
I unstitched it from Cain's jersey.
1487
01:21:14,161 --> 01:21:16,664
It's yours now. You've earned it.
1488
01:21:22,211 --> 01:21:24,171
Flammer, Flammer, come on.
1489
01:21:34,181 --> 01:21:37,268
I learned the difference
between a moment and a career
1490
01:21:37,435 --> 01:21:39,437
is evolution.
1491
01:21:40,479 --> 01:21:42,315
Evolution.
1492
01:21:42,481 --> 01:21:45,067
You will slow down.
1493
01:21:45,234 --> 01:21:47,403
You will get old.
1494
01:21:47,570 --> 01:21:50,656
Your body will fail you.
1495
01:21:50,823 --> 01:21:53,701
So you evolve.
1496
01:21:53,868 --> 01:21:56,329
You change your game.
1497
01:21:56,495 --> 01:21:59,165
You do what you need to do
with the time you got.
1498
01:22:00,791 --> 01:22:03,753
If not, you go extinct.
1499
01:22:06,005 --> 01:22:09,467
Evolve or go extinct.
1500
01:22:12,011 --> 01:22:14,013
- Are you ready to go extinct?
- No, I am not.
1501
01:22:14,180 --> 01:22:16,474
- No fuckin' way.
- Are you fucking extinct?
1502
01:22:16,641 --> 01:22:18,809
- No!
- No, absolutely not.
1503
01:22:18,976 --> 01:22:20,770
Well, I'm still here.
1504
01:22:20,937 --> 01:22:23,481
I'm not ready to go fucking extinct.
1505
01:22:23,648 --> 01:22:26,692
- The Highlanders are still here!
- Yeah, we are.
1506
01:22:26,859 --> 01:22:28,945
The fucking Highlanders are here!
1507
01:22:30,863 --> 01:22:33,741
Highlanders! Highlanders!
1508
01:22:33,908 --> 01:22:36,869
Highlanders! Highlanders!
1509
01:22:37,036 --> 01:22:40,331
Highlanders! Highlanders!
1510
01:22:40,498 --> 01:22:44,085
Highlanders! Highlanders! Highlanders!
1511
01:22:44,251 --> 01:22:45,836
Alright, boys?
1512
01:22:46,003 --> 01:22:47,755
Let's do this! Come on!
1513
01:22:47,922 --> 01:22:49,757
This is it, folks.
1514
01:22:49,924 --> 01:22:51,604
It's do or die for the Highlanders tonight.
1515
01:22:51,634 --> 01:22:54,428
Their entire season
comes down to this one game.
1516
01:22:54,595 --> 01:22:56,555
It's that simple.
1517
01:23:00,893 --> 01:23:03,562
- Fuck 'em up!
- Come on!
1518
01:23:03,729 --> 01:23:07,483
Which one do you want? I got the big one.
1519
01:23:07,650 --> 01:23:09,360
Ah, fuck it. I want both of 'em.
1520
01:23:15,658 --> 01:23:18,452
It's open season on all your
fucking boys tonight, Doug.
1521
01:23:18,619 --> 01:23:22,581
- I don't have to fight you.
- Yeah, you do.
1522
01:23:29,797 --> 01:23:32,425
So it's a must-win
for the Halifax Highlanders.
1523
01:23:32,591 --> 01:23:34,844
There's no tomorrow if they don't.
1524
01:23:35,011 --> 01:23:36,887
Guys, listen, I got some changes here.
1525
01:23:37,054 --> 01:23:39,849
Flammer, Dougie, Rhea, off the hop,
1526
01:23:40,016 --> 01:23:41,726
Legs and Geno on the back end.
1527
01:23:41,892 --> 01:23:44,687
Okay, boys, let's go. Game faces, focus.
1528
01:23:44,854 --> 01:23:46,894
They're gonna try and taunt us.
Don't look for shit.
1529
01:23:46,939 --> 01:23:49,525
Now Doug Glatt comes out
to take the opening faceoff
1530
01:23:49,692 --> 01:23:53,696
alongside Ross Rhea, former combatants.
1531
01:23:53,863 --> 01:23:57,074
Hey, big fella. You like Kim Mitchell?
1532
01:23:57,241 --> 01:23:58,826
That's what I thought.
1533
01:23:58,993 --> 01:24:00,870
Alright. We're fuckin' going.
1534
01:24:01,037 --> 01:24:03,330
- Alright, here we go.
- What the fuck did I just say?
1535
01:24:03,497 --> 01:24:05,666
Coach said don't look for shit. That's shit.
1536
01:24:05,833 --> 01:24:08,169
I bet you don't like Rush either,
you fuckin' big Litvak.
1537
01:24:08,335 --> 01:24:10,880
He's looking for shit.
Goddamn it, laid 'em right out.
1538
01:24:11,047 --> 01:24:13,340
Jesus Christ, what are they feeding ya?
1539
01:24:13,507 --> 01:24:15,384
A lot of fuckin' pierogis, eh?
1540
01:24:15,551 --> 01:24:19,513
Easy, big fella. Alright. Here we go.
1541
01:24:33,778 --> 01:24:35,905
Well, folks, big girls may not cry...
1542
01:24:36,072 --> 01:24:37,448
How about that, eh?
1543
01:24:37,615 --> 01:24:40,242
...but big men from Eastern Europe
apparently bleed a lot.
1544
01:24:40,409 --> 01:24:43,454
Fuckin' right! I can do this all night, boys.
1545
01:24:44,497 --> 01:24:46,540
You're gonna leave
this building in an ambulance.
1546
01:24:46,707 --> 01:24:48,101
Sorry, Point Break. You say something?
1547
01:24:48,125 --> 01:24:49,877
- Rosser, Rosser, nah, nah.
- Come on, boy.
1548
01:24:50,044 --> 01:24:52,046
- You can come play.
- It's over. Go to the box.
1549
01:24:52,213 --> 01:24:54,965
No? Alright. You sure?
1550
01:24:55,132 --> 01:24:57,343
Oh! No. He doesn't wanna fucking play.
1551
01:24:57,510 --> 01:24:59,845
Let's go.
1552
01:25:03,224 --> 01:25:05,434
So at the faceoff, the puck is dropped.
1553
01:25:05,601 --> 01:25:06,977
It goes back to Anders Cain.
1554
01:25:07,144 --> 01:25:08,904
The former captain of the
Halifax Highlanders
1555
01:25:08,979 --> 01:25:10,856
bounces off a check,
moves up the right wing
1556
01:25:11,023 --> 01:25:13,943
moves right in on goal,
trying to bang it by Belchior.
1557
01:25:14,110 --> 01:25:18,197
Runs into Ahmed.
They count the goal. Should it count?
1558
01:25:18,364 --> 01:25:20,425
- Where's the fucking whistle?!
- Where the fuck's the whistle?
1559
01:25:20,449 --> 01:25:22,118
Cheap fucking goal.
1560
01:25:22,284 --> 01:25:25,830
So, the Highlanders down 1-0
in the second period,
1561
01:25:25,996 --> 01:25:27,373
a game they have to win.
1562
01:25:27,540 --> 01:25:29,625
And here comes LaFlamme,
dancing up the centre ice.
1563
01:25:29,792 --> 01:25:31,293
LaFlamme makes a move,
1564
01:25:31,460 --> 01:25:33,188
dipsy-doodle, heads toward
the front of the net.
1565
01:25:33,212 --> 01:25:36,132
Flips it back. Yakovlena. He scores!
1566
01:25:36,298 --> 01:25:37,675
Yes!
1567
01:25:37,842 --> 01:25:41,178
- Yes. Yes. Yes.
- Evgeni Yakovlena...
1568
01:25:42,596 --> 01:25:47,309
...scored by number 6, Evgeni Yakovlena.
1569
01:25:47,476 --> 01:25:49,061
So it's 1-1 in the second period.
1570
01:25:49,228 --> 01:25:51,272
Here once again is LaFlamme...
1571
01:25:51,438 --> 01:25:53,524
Oh! Was he hammered!
1572
01:25:53,691 --> 01:25:55,234
- Horseshit!
- Fucking bullshit!
1573
01:25:55,401 --> 01:25:57,921
- Put me in right fucking now.
- You've done enough for tonight.
1574
01:25:58,070 --> 01:25:59,613
- Fucking asshole.
- We'll get him.
1575
01:25:59,780 --> 01:26:02,741
- That's fucking bullshit.
- He's a fucking lunatic!
1576
01:26:05,578 --> 01:26:07,204
Now the puck finds its way to Glatt.
1577
01:26:07,371 --> 01:26:08,998
- They're normally strangers.
- Dougie!
1578
01:26:09,165 --> 01:26:10,916
Holy cow!
1579
01:26:11,083 --> 01:26:12,626
- Jesus.
- Thanks, X!
1580
01:26:12,793 --> 01:26:15,754
- Did you see that?!
- That's Captain A.
1581
01:26:15,921 --> 01:26:19,508
It was LaFlamme who
ran into and decked Cain!
1582
01:26:19,675 --> 01:26:21,260
Flammer's loaded for bear.
1583
01:26:21,427 --> 01:26:24,263
Here comes LaFlamme,
makes a move around the defender,
1584
01:26:24,430 --> 01:26:25,806
moves right in on the goal.
1585
01:26:25,973 --> 01:26:28,434
Magic hands. Great save by Nicholai.
1586
01:26:28,601 --> 01:26:31,312
Watch Flammer's back. Do what
you gotta do, but keep it clean.
1587
01:26:31,478 --> 01:26:33,272
Six minutes left in the third period.
1588
01:26:33,439 --> 01:26:36,567
Halifax and Reading
still tied at a goal apiece.
1589
01:26:37,693 --> 01:26:39,820
- Take ice away! Come on!
- Here's Anders Cain.
1590
01:26:39,987 --> 01:26:41,989
- Cain gets it over to Totan.
- Get on the puck!
1591
01:26:42,156 --> 01:26:44,116
Totan looks back, returns it to Cain.
1592
01:26:48,037 --> 01:26:50,706
What is this you're doing? Make shoot!
1593
01:26:50,873 --> 01:26:52,583
Cain seems to be in the midst of
1594
01:26:52,750 --> 01:26:55,169
some sort of psycho-athletic fugue state.
1595
01:26:55,336 --> 01:26:57,296
Fuckin' make shoot!
1596
01:27:00,591 --> 01:27:03,135
Mother of God!
1597
01:27:03,302 --> 01:27:04,988
- Holy snappin' arseholes.
- What the fuck's he doing?
1598
01:27:05,012 --> 01:27:06,698
- Right off his rocker.
- What's he fuckin' doing?
1599
01:27:06,722 --> 01:27:08,057
What the fuck?
1600
01:27:08,224 --> 01:27:11,018
Cain seems to have actually fired the puck
1601
01:27:11,185 --> 01:27:13,562
into his father's loge accommodations.
1602
01:27:13,729 --> 01:27:15,648
You gonna call that or what?
1603
01:27:17,024 --> 01:27:19,318
Now Anders Cain takes a shot at LaFlamme.
1604
01:27:19,485 --> 01:27:21,820
- Come on!
- LaFlamme punches back at Cain.
1605
01:27:21,987 --> 01:27:24,365
Ross Rhea steps in. Cain gives a right.
1606
01:27:24,531 --> 01:27:26,283
What the fuck was that?
1607
01:27:26,450 --> 01:27:28,327
I'm gonna teach you some fuckin' manners, son.
1608
01:27:28,494 --> 01:27:32,248
He has gone absolutely bonkers
in this game here tonight.
1609
01:27:32,414 --> 01:27:35,793
Now he goes to the penalty box.
So does Ross Rhea.
1610
01:27:35,960 --> 01:27:37,336
Fuck you, Cain!
1611
01:27:37,503 --> 01:27:40,214
Halifax number three, Ross Rhea,
1612
01:27:40,381 --> 01:27:43,175
Reading number 13, Anders Cain.
1613
01:27:43,342 --> 01:27:47,012
- Getting tired?
- Dude, I'm always tired.
1614
01:27:48,097 --> 01:27:49,765
'Cause you're an old piece of shit.
1615
01:27:49,932 --> 01:27:51,558
You got me there.
1616
01:27:52,893 --> 01:27:55,229
This old piece of shit's gonna
take your fuckin' head off.
1617
01:27:55,396 --> 01:27:57,898
Rhea! Get your ass back to the bench!
1618
01:27:58,065 --> 01:27:59,441
We're gonna kill this thing.
1619
01:28:04,905 --> 01:28:06,323
Good luck, kid.
1620
01:28:08,409 --> 01:28:10,452
The two combatants step
back out on the ice...
1621
01:28:10,619 --> 01:28:12,413
Where are you going? What are you doing?
1622
01:28:12,579 --> 01:28:14,707
...and immediately
Rhea begins to chase Cain.
1623
01:28:14,873 --> 01:28:16,208
Rhea!
1624
01:28:17,376 --> 01:28:19,086
The puck is still in Reading territory.
1625
01:28:19,253 --> 01:28:20,773
Now it's knocked back to the blue line.
1626
01:28:20,921 --> 01:28:22,798
Here's a shot on goal. A save is made.
1627
01:28:22,965 --> 01:28:25,759
Puck goes into the corner.
Rhea goes in after it.
1628
01:28:25,926 --> 01:28:29,305
- Anders, no.
- And going after Rhea is Cain.
1629
01:28:29,471 --> 01:28:31,557
No!
1630
01:28:31,724 --> 01:28:34,560
I told you you'd end up in
a fucking ambulance.
1631
01:28:34,727 --> 01:28:37,771
- You fucking piece of shit!
- Get the fuck out of here, Cain.
1632
01:28:37,938 --> 01:28:40,232
Rhea is down. He's bloodied.
1633
01:28:40,399 --> 01:28:42,484
He may well be unconscious.
1634
01:28:42,651 --> 01:28:45,070
Motherfucker!
1635
01:28:45,237 --> 01:28:47,437
Let's get the board out.
Let's get him on the stretcher.
1636
01:28:47,573 --> 01:28:49,992
They're bringing out the stretcher.
1637
01:28:50,159 --> 01:28:52,411
Rhea is down, folks. He's bleeding.
1638
01:28:52,578 --> 01:28:54,163
This doesn't look good.
1639
01:28:59,626 --> 01:29:01,003
1640
01:29:06,050 --> 01:29:07,634
- Doug.
- Shit.
1641
01:29:07,801 --> 01:29:09,762
Okay, up, back down. Okay.
1642
01:29:09,928 --> 01:29:11,430
Ladies and gentlemen,
1643
01:29:11,597 --> 01:29:14,016
Doug 'The Thug' Glatt is entering the fray.
1644
01:29:14,183 --> 01:29:17,186
He's making a beeline for Anders Cain.
1645
01:29:17,353 --> 01:29:20,689
This could only mean one thing.
1646
01:29:20,856 --> 01:29:22,576
I thought you didn't need to fight me, Doug.
1647
01:29:22,608 --> 01:29:24,109
Lay him the fuck out, kid.
1648
01:29:27,738 --> 01:29:28,739
Doug...
1649
01:29:28,906 --> 01:29:31,075
This is for someone else.
1650
01:29:42,836 --> 01:29:45,923
Cain and Glatt going at
each other one after the other.
1651
01:29:46,090 --> 01:29:48,634
One, two, three.
1652
01:29:48,801 --> 01:29:50,594
Oh, he hammers Glatt.
1653
01:29:50,761 --> 01:29:52,763
- Fuck.
- Blood spews.
1654
01:29:52,930 --> 01:29:55,474
1655
01:29:59,770 --> 01:30:03,232
And these guys are being
left to their own devices.
1656
01:30:08,612 --> 01:30:11,115
- Yes!
- These men are wild.
1657
01:30:11,281 --> 01:30:14,034
They're crazy. There's blood everywhere.
1658
01:30:16,328 --> 01:30:18,122
Attaboy, Dougie.
1659
01:30:19,456 --> 01:30:23,085
I'm glad you came back, Doug! Come on!
1660
01:30:36,807 --> 01:30:39,935
Oh, blood and gore all over the floor!
1661
01:30:42,813 --> 01:30:45,566
The linesmen are nowhere to be seen.
1662
01:30:45,732 --> 01:30:47,234
You can't blame them.
1663
01:30:58,412 --> 01:31:00,998
Doug! Doug! Doug! Doug!
1664
01:31:01,165 --> 01:31:03,542
Do it. Do it, Doug.
1665
01:31:04,960 --> 01:31:06,795
Take his fucking head off!
1666
01:31:06,962 --> 01:31:09,339
Doug! Doug! Doug! Doug!
1667
01:31:09,506 --> 01:31:11,758
Doug! Doug! Doug! Doug! Doug!
1668
01:31:11,925 --> 01:31:12,968
Do it.
1669
01:31:13,135 --> 01:31:16,388
No.
1670
01:31:18,891 --> 01:31:20,309
It's over.
1671
01:31:24,897 --> 01:31:26,899
It's never over.
1672
01:31:29,026 --> 01:31:31,111
We're gonna do this night after night...
1673
01:31:32,905 --> 01:31:36,450
...game after fucking game.
1674
01:31:36,617 --> 01:31:38,744
You hear me, Doug?
1675
01:31:38,911 --> 01:31:43,540
Game after fucking game!
1676
01:31:44,750 --> 01:31:47,836
Look up there, Doug.
1677
01:31:48,003 --> 01:31:51,632
Look at 'em! This is it!
1678
01:31:53,133 --> 01:31:56,094
This is what they want us to do!
1679
01:31:56,261 --> 01:31:58,805
I do whatever my team needs me to do.
1680
01:31:58,972 --> 01:32:00,933
We're just gonna keep
fucking bleeding out here...
1681
01:32:01,099 --> 01:32:02,351
Doug.
1682
01:32:02,518 --> 01:32:04,144
...over and over again
1683
01:32:04,311 --> 01:32:08,524
until they cart every fucking last one of us
1684
01:32:08,690 --> 01:32:10,359
off the fucking ice!
1685
01:32:10,526 --> 01:32:11,652
- Doug!
- Dougie!
1686
01:32:35,801 --> 01:32:38,595
Jesus, Dougie. Are you okay?
1687
01:32:38,762 --> 01:32:41,932
Not really, but thanks for askin'.
1688
01:32:46,228 --> 01:32:49,314
Right there. Right there.
1689
01:32:59,533 --> 01:33:02,411
Anders, can you hear me? Hey, hey.
1690
01:33:02,578 --> 01:33:04,788
It's okay.
1691
01:33:06,540 --> 01:33:08,417
I fucking...
1692
01:33:09,626 --> 01:33:12,462
...hate this sport.
1693
01:33:12,629 --> 01:33:15,382
Oh, righto.
1694
01:33:21,638 --> 01:33:23,390
One, two, three.
1695
01:33:26,268 --> 01:33:29,104
- Don't hate me, here.
- I don't hate you, Parky.
1696
01:33:29,271 --> 01:33:31,982
I could never hate you.
1697
01:33:32,149 --> 01:33:35,819
Highlanders! Highlanders! Highlanders!
1698
01:33:35,986 --> 01:33:39,114
There's only seconds left
and nothing is settled.
1699
01:33:39,281 --> 01:33:40,961
As LaFlamme moves through the neutral zone,
1700
01:33:41,074 --> 01:33:42,451
gets in across the line,
1701
01:33:42,618 --> 01:33:44,161
he's got Stevenson on his flank.
1702
01:33:48,290 --> 01:33:51,043
Highlanders! Highlanders!
1703
01:33:51,209 --> 01:33:54,546
Highlanders! Highlanders!
1704
01:33:54,713 --> 01:33:57,507
LaFlamme's now moving in toward Totan.
1705
01:34:00,010 --> 01:34:01,553
Five seconds left.
1706
01:34:04,806 --> 01:34:06,767
Stevenson is there...
1707
01:34:09,686 --> 01:34:12,272
LaFlamme moving in...
1708
01:34:18,320 --> 01:34:22,616
Excalibur!
1709
01:34:26,828 --> 01:34:31,124
Stevenson scores! They did it!
The Highlanders win!
1710
01:34:31,291 --> 01:34:32,709
The Highlanders win!
1711
01:34:32,876 --> 01:34:35,879
For just the second time in 10 years,
1712
01:34:36,046 --> 01:34:39,174
the Halifax Highlanders
are going to the play-offs!
1713
01:34:54,272 --> 01:34:55,816
'Bye, guys.
1714
01:35:32,602 --> 01:35:34,229
1715
01:35:34,396 --> 01:35:37,441
That's when the handjobs start.
1716
01:35:37,607 --> 01:35:39,276
Oh, no, I was wrong.
1717
01:35:39,443 --> 01:35:42,571
They're starting early today.
No lube or nothin'.
1718
01:35:42,738 --> 01:35:46,783
Give it to him, Johnny! Masturbate that penis!
1719
01:35:48,326 --> 01:35:50,454
This is the weirdest fucking job ever.
1720
01:35:51,830 --> 01:35:54,624
Sorry about that.
1721
01:35:54,791 --> 01:35:57,753
- It had to happen once.
- You good?
1722
01:35:57,919 --> 01:35:59,546
Wow, it smells like dick.
1723
01:35:59,713 --> 01:36:01,840
Oh, God, it smells so much like piss.
1724
01:36:02,007 --> 01:36:04,301
I had no response to that.
1725
01:36:04,468 --> 01:36:06,261
Well, if you give me enough booze,
1726
01:36:06,428 --> 01:36:08,013
I'll munch a box or two.
1727
01:36:08,180 --> 01:36:11,558
I mean...
1728
01:36:11,725 --> 01:36:15,145
- Oh, my God.
- Only two?
1729
01:36:15,312 --> 01:36:17,189
A couple.
1730
01:36:17,355 --> 01:36:19,608
- Let's try that one more time.
- What is the line?
1731
01:36:19,775 --> 01:36:21,985
Highlanders! Highlanders!
1732
01:36:22,152 --> 01:36:23,695
Highland...
1733
01:36:23,862 --> 01:36:25,238
Alright, shut the fuck up.
1734
01:36:27,073 --> 01:36:28,575
What did you do, man?
1735
01:36:28,742 --> 01:36:30,952
You had a jack-off selfie
on my grandmother's grave,
1736
01:36:31,119 --> 01:36:35,332
you fuckin' inbred Slavic
fuckin' potato vampire!
1737
01:36:35,499 --> 01:36:37,751
I'm telling you, man,
knowing you and playing with you
1738
01:36:37,918 --> 01:36:41,171
is like being force-fed fucking junkie piss!
1739
01:36:41,338 --> 01:36:42,714
And you two!
1740
01:36:42,881 --> 01:36:45,217
You're like fucking Mother Russia's herpes, man!
1741
01:36:45,383 --> 01:36:46,843
The bitch shipped them to Canada
1742
01:36:47,010 --> 01:36:48,470
and fuckin' made me deal with 'em!
1743
01:36:48,637 --> 01:36:51,097
Belchy!
1744
01:36:51,264 --> 01:36:52,891
He gets it! I love candy!
1745
01:36:53,058 --> 01:36:56,102
What? Yeah, I'll take a fucking candy!
I love fucking candy!
1746
01:36:56,269 --> 01:37:01,525
He fucking gets it! Fuck!
No! No more fucking candies!
1747
01:37:01,691 --> 01:37:04,069
Sports Desk. We've got slogans.
1748
01:37:04,236 --> 01:37:07,781
Sports Desk. Our slogan is a slogan.
1749
01:37:07,948 --> 01:37:09,324
You're watching Sports Desk.
1750
01:37:09,491 --> 01:37:11,368
Sports Desk. We're all pink on the inside.
1751
01:37:16,164 --> 01:37:18,750
- Ow! Ugh!
- Ow! Fuck! Ow!
1752
01:37:20,710 --> 01:37:22,671
I'm sorry, dude. That was really awkward.
1753
01:37:31,596 --> 01:37:33,223
What the fuck are you wearing, dude?
1754
01:37:33,390 --> 01:37:35,267
It's supposed to make me look big.
1755
01:37:35,433 --> 01:37:37,894
Why do you shop in little girl section?
1756
01:37:40,313 --> 01:37:43,233
You honestly look like
you're on the fuckin' autobahn
1757
01:37:43,400 --> 01:37:44,818
straight to Gay Town, man.
1758
01:37:44,985 --> 01:37:47,779
On the blonde bus to Anal Town, hm?
1759
01:37:48,989 --> 01:37:52,409
You look like a little Nazi weightlifter.
1760
01:37:55,036 --> 01:37:57,664
Power-lifting fucking dongs, man.
1761
01:37:57,831 --> 01:38:01,918
Like...
1762
01:38:02,085 --> 01:38:05,171
I guess they like him
'cause he's got smaller hands.
1763
01:38:05,338 --> 01:38:06,715
- Who wouldn't?
- You know?
1764
01:38:06,882 --> 01:38:08,717
Feels like a female's hands,
1765
01:38:08,884 --> 01:38:12,053
but make no mistake, that is a man.
1766
01:38:14,431 --> 01:38:17,350
I'm not stooping to your fuckin' level.
1767
01:38:17,517 --> 01:38:19,519
- The mayonnaise is semen.
- What?
1768
01:38:19,686 --> 01:38:23,940
- Enjoy the cannoli.
- This is so disrespectful, man.
1769
01:38:24,107 --> 01:38:27,277
And it better not have come out
of that fuckin' sturgeon.
1770
01:38:33,658 --> 01:38:37,621
Always driving away the ones you love.
1771
01:38:45,003 --> 01:38:47,130
I love this movie!
1772
01:40:48,626 --> 01:40:50,754
Hockey history is full of star players
1773
01:40:50,920 --> 01:40:52,297
and its backup enforcers.
1774
01:40:52,464 --> 01:40:53,882
- You know, you got Gretzky...
- Mm.
1775
01:40:54,049 --> 01:40:55,049
...and McSorley.
1776
01:40:55,091 --> 01:40:57,052
Well, I don't know if I'm a Gretzky.
1777
01:40:57,218 --> 01:40:58,595
- Doug...
- Thank you.
1778
01:40:58,762 --> 01:41:00,680
He took our fucking microphone.