1
00:00:00,455 --> 00:00:02,182
So, again, your alibi is
a mysterious stranger
2
00:00:02,183 --> 00:00:07,023
handed you the gun,
made you put your prints on it,
3
00:00:07,024 --> 00:00:09,229
robbed the store,
and then hid the gun
4
00:00:09,230 --> 00:00:10,341
in your underpants.
5
00:00:10,342 --> 00:00:11,494
Well, yeah, if you say it
like that,
6
00:00:11,495 --> 00:00:12,657
it don't sound believable.
7
00:00:12,658 --> 00:00:13,889
Oh, hey, Captain.
8
00:00:13,890 --> 00:00:15,633
Did you get my report
on the Finley murder?
9
00:00:15,634 --> 00:00:17,207
Yeah, I looked it over.
Nice work.
10
00:00:17,208 --> 00:00:18,404
Good. Thanks, dad.
11
00:00:20,867 --> 00:00:23,002
Why is everyone
staring at me?
12
00:00:23,036 --> 00:00:24,770
You just called
Captain Holt "dad."
13
00:00:24,771 --> 00:00:26,005
You said, "thanks, dad."
14
00:00:26,039 --> 00:00:27,653
What? No, I didn't.
I said, "thanks, man."
15
00:00:27,674 --> 00:00:29,542
Do you see me as
a father figure, Peralta?
16
00:00:29,576 --> 00:00:31,444
No. If anything, I see you
17
00:00:31,478 --> 00:00:32,578
as a "bother" figure,
18
00:00:32,579 --> 00:00:33,913
'cause you're always
bothering me.
19
00:00:33,914 --> 00:00:36,215
Hey, show your father
some respect.
20
00:00:36,249 --> 00:00:37,683
I didn't call him dad.
21
00:00:37,718 --> 00:00:39,452
No, no, no, no, Jacob.
22
00:00:39,486 --> 00:00:40,653
I take it as a compliment.
23
00:00:40,687 --> 00:00:42,088
It's not a big deal.
24
00:00:42,089 --> 00:00:44,503
I called Vivian "mom" once,
and she's my fiancée.
25
00:00:44,524 --> 00:00:46,092
Guys, jump on that!
26
00:00:46,093 --> 00:00:47,626
Boyle has
psycho-sexual issues.
27
00:00:47,627 --> 00:00:48,799
(Amy)
Old news.
28
00:00:48,829 --> 00:00:50,796
But you calling Holt "daddy"...
29
00:00:50,797 --> 00:00:52,898
Hey, "daddy" is not
on the table here.
30
00:00:52,933 --> 00:00:54,972
But you did call him
"dad," dude.
31
00:00:55,002 --> 00:00:56,035
You shut up.
You've done nothing
32
00:00:56,036 --> 00:00:57,370
but lie since you got here.
33
00:00:57,371 --> 00:00:58,871
All right, all right,
I was lying about the holdup.
34
00:00:58,872 --> 00:01:00,473
But the dad thing,
that happened.
35
00:01:00,507 --> 00:01:02,208
Aha!
36
00:01:02,209 --> 00:01:03,542
He admitted that his alibi
was a lie.
37
00:01:03,577 --> 00:01:07,859
It was a trap, all part
of my crazy, devious plan.
38
00:01:07,881 --> 00:01:09,486
I believe you.
Thank you.
39
00:01:09,516 --> 00:01:11,050
Son.
40
00:01:11,084 --> 00:01:12,318
Do you want to talk
about it later
41
00:01:12,319 --> 00:01:15,388
over a game of catch?
42
00:01:15,389 --> 00:01:16,326
I'd like that.
43
00:01:16,356 --> 00:01:20,124
Sync & corrections by Rafael UPD
www.addic7ed.com/
44
00:01:20,125 --> 00:01:25,358
♪ ♪
45
00:01:37,277 --> 00:01:38,878
(Holt) Thank you for coming in
on your day off.
46
00:01:38,912 --> 00:01:40,225
I know you'd all rather be
at home,
47
00:01:40,247 --> 00:01:41,847
binge watching media content.
48
00:01:41,848 --> 00:01:43,916
Oh! I just started
the second season
49
00:01:43,917 --> 00:01:45,184
of media content.
50
00:01:45,185 --> 00:01:46,385
No spoilers.
51
00:01:46,420 --> 00:01:48,621
But these evaluations
are important.
52
00:01:48,622 --> 00:01:50,890
Sir, I think I speak
for all of us...
53
00:01:50,891 --> 00:01:52,291
All: She doesn't.
54
00:01:52,292 --> 00:01:54,327
When I say that we can't wait
55
00:01:54,328 --> 00:01:56,095
for you to sit
in judgment of us.
56
00:01:56,129 --> 00:01:58,631
Oh, these will be
self-evaluations, Santiago.
57
00:01:58,665 --> 00:02:00,900
Why... se.
58
00:02:00,901 --> 00:02:02,902
Very wise, sir.
59
00:02:02,903 --> 00:02:03,902
Nice save.
60
00:02:03,904 --> 00:02:05,204
Also, please stay
out of the way
61
00:02:05,205 --> 00:02:06,439
of the weekend squad.
62
00:02:06,440 --> 00:02:08,708
They are on duty,
and the bullpen is theirs.
63
00:02:08,709 --> 00:02:10,743
I hate the weekend squad.
64
00:02:10,744 --> 00:02:12,478
Detective Lohank
shaves at my desk
65
00:02:12,479 --> 00:02:13,646
and gets hair
all over my computer.
66
00:02:13,647 --> 00:02:15,481
My "R" key
is jammed with stubble.
67
00:02:15,515 --> 00:02:17,149
Well, that explains
the email you sent
68
00:02:17,150 --> 00:02:19,431
about the "guesome mude."
69
00:02:19,453 --> 00:02:21,120
Dismissed.
70
00:02:21,121 --> 00:02:23,268
I'm pumped for these
evaluations, sir.
71
00:02:23,290 --> 00:02:25,591
I can't wait to hear what you
have to say about my squad.
72
00:02:25,592 --> 00:02:27,326
I think they've had
a great year.
73
00:02:27,361 --> 00:02:29,295
I feel like
a proud mama hen
74
00:02:29,296 --> 00:02:31,464
whose baby chicks
have learned to fly.
75
00:02:31,498 --> 00:02:33,032
Interesting analogy,
sergeant.
76
00:02:33,033 --> 00:02:35,568
Chickens are famously bad
at flying.
77
00:02:35,569 --> 00:02:36,569
(Jake)
Yo.
78
00:02:36,603 --> 00:02:38,237
(Terry)
Peralta asked to be first,
79
00:02:38,238 --> 00:02:40,639
which shows how seriously
he's begun taking his job.
80
00:02:40,674 --> 00:02:42,241
Nope, I just want to get
this over with.
81
00:02:42,275 --> 00:02:43,576
So I have 72 arrests,
82
00:02:43,610 --> 00:02:46,045
an 80% clearance rate,
83
00:02:46,046 --> 00:02:48,347
but most importantly,
84
00:02:48,348 --> 00:02:50,082
I wore a tie sometimes.
85
00:02:50,117 --> 00:02:52,284
Now, I have a question
for you:
86
00:02:52,319 --> 00:02:54,754
Is there any way
I can borrow $430,000?
87
00:02:54,755 --> 00:02:56,756
Why on earth do you need
that much money?
88
00:02:56,757 --> 00:02:58,257
I need to buy my apartment.
89
00:02:58,291 --> 00:02:59,692
I've been living
at my Nana's place
90
00:02:59,693 --> 00:03:01,527
since she passed away
'cause it's rent-controlled,
91
00:03:01,528 --> 00:03:03,162
but now the building's
going co-op,
92
00:03:03,163 --> 00:03:04,476
so I have to buy it.
93
00:03:04,498 --> 00:03:07,300
I need to secure a loan
by the end of the day.
94
00:03:07,301 --> 00:03:09,402
Uh, so should we do
a wire transfer,
95
00:03:09,403 --> 00:03:10,670
or do you think cash
is easier?
96
00:03:10,671 --> 00:03:11,771
Let's just do cash.
97
00:03:11,805 --> 00:03:13,072
Shouldn't you be asking
somebody else
98
00:03:13,073 --> 00:03:14,206
for that kind of money?
99
00:03:14,207 --> 00:03:15,206
Like a bank?
100
00:03:15,208 --> 00:03:17,364
Yeah, I tried that.
101
00:03:17,377 --> 00:03:19,445
[Laughing hysterically]
102
00:03:22,949 --> 00:03:24,483
Jake, I cannot believe
103
00:03:24,518 --> 00:03:26,385
you're gonna lose
Nana's apartment.
104
00:03:26,386 --> 00:03:28,054
We grew up together.
We used to hang out there
105
00:03:28,055 --> 00:03:29,455
every day after school.
106
00:03:29,489 --> 00:03:32,325
That's right, because there was
no one to look after us,
107
00:03:32,326 --> 00:03:35,027
because our moms
both worked, and...
108
00:03:35,028 --> 00:03:37,163
[Sighs heavily]
We didn't have fathers
109
00:03:37,164 --> 00:03:38,264
because divorce.
110
00:03:38,298 --> 00:03:40,800
Peralta, I will not give you
a cool half mil
111
00:03:40,801 --> 00:03:42,806
because you had
a slightly sad childhood.
112
00:03:42,836 --> 00:03:45,271
Go solve
your housing crisis.
113
00:03:45,305 --> 00:03:46,605
Can I go with him?
114
00:03:46,606 --> 00:03:51,077
Nana made me the intelligent,
sensuous woman I am today.
115
00:03:51,111 --> 00:03:53,279
Weird way to describe
a grandma's influence on you.
116
00:03:53,280 --> 00:03:54,347
I'm sorry, Gina.
117
00:03:54,348 --> 00:03:55,815
I don't know
that we can spare you.
118
00:03:55,816 --> 00:03:57,850
Um, these are her notes
so far.
119
00:03:57,851 --> 00:04:00,086
"Empanadas, Atlantic city,
birth control."
120
00:04:00,087 --> 00:04:01,520
No, that's my travel journal.
121
00:04:01,521 --> 00:04:03,356
I haven't started
on the notes yet.
122
00:04:03,390 --> 00:04:05,324
You may go with Peralta.
123
00:04:05,325 --> 00:04:07,293
Both: Thank you.
124
00:04:07,294 --> 00:04:09,495
I want to take Vivian
somewhere romantic tonight.
125
00:04:09,529 --> 00:04:10,709
How about this?
126
00:04:10,731 --> 00:04:11,864
Graziolo's,
127
00:04:11,898 --> 00:04:14,300
for the porco digestivo meal.
128
00:04:14,301 --> 00:04:17,903
It's a culinary tour
of a pig's digestive track.
129
00:04:17,938 --> 00:04:19,705
Pig bung gelato for two,
anyone?
130
00:04:19,740 --> 00:04:21,240
(Rosa)
Uh-oh, heads up.
131
00:04:21,274 --> 00:04:22,273
Weekend crew.
132
00:04:22,275 --> 00:04:25,278
[Shady music]
133
00:04:25,279 --> 00:04:26,746
♪ ♪
134
00:04:26,780 --> 00:04:28,481
(Charles)
I feel sad for you.
135
00:04:28,482 --> 00:04:30,016
I love my desk buddy.
136
00:04:30,017 --> 00:04:31,550
Sometimes Detective Kearns
and I leave presents
137
00:04:31,551 --> 00:04:33,953
for each other.
138
00:04:33,954 --> 00:04:35,021
Yeah.
139
00:04:35,055 --> 00:04:36,401
Well, Lohank's
a stubble monkey.
140
00:04:36,423 --> 00:04:38,257
I hate him
and his face garbage.
141
00:04:38,258 --> 00:04:40,126
Why don't you just tell him
to stop shaving at his desk?
142
00:04:40,160 --> 00:04:42,662
He denies even doing it.
I don't know why.
143
00:04:42,663 --> 00:04:43,863
Next time I catch him shaving,
144
00:04:43,864 --> 00:04:45,064
I'm gonna punch him
so hard in the mouth
145
00:04:45,065 --> 00:04:47,633
he bites his own heart.
146
00:04:47,634 --> 00:04:49,502
Could that be why
he denies doing it?
147
00:04:49,503 --> 00:04:52,538
Oh, yeah, you could be right.
Yeah.
148
00:04:52,539 --> 00:04:54,373
(Gina)
Oh, wow.
149
00:04:54,374 --> 00:04:57,476
It is always so crazy
coming back here.
150
00:04:57,511 --> 00:04:59,078
Remember when Nana got cable?
151
00:04:59,079 --> 00:05:02,093
We watched house party 2
so many times.
152
00:05:02,115 --> 00:05:04,183
It was a pajama-jamma-jam.
We had no choice.
153
00:05:04,217 --> 00:05:05,718
Our hands were tied.
I gotta say,
154
00:05:05,719 --> 00:05:07,933
I'm psyched to be hanging
like this, old-school stylez.
155
00:05:07,955 --> 00:05:09,155
"Stylez" with a "Z".
156
00:05:09,189 --> 00:05:11,090
Oh, I could tell.
[Laughs]
157
00:05:11,091 --> 00:05:12,658
Okay, well, maybe we can
figure out a way for you
158
00:05:12,659 --> 00:05:14,093
to afford this place.
159
00:05:14,094 --> 00:05:15,190
Where's all
your bank statements?
160
00:05:15,195 --> 00:05:17,563
Hup, hup, before we get
all financial,
161
00:05:17,564 --> 00:05:20,237
can I interest you
in an ice-cold foh-dy?
162
00:05:20,267 --> 00:05:22,868
A'ight.
163
00:05:22,903 --> 00:05:25,071
So talk to me, goose.
How we lookin'?
164
00:05:25,072 --> 00:05:27,239
Sexy, but not like
we're trying too hard.
165
00:05:27,240 --> 00:05:28,341
Like, sure, we're trying,
166
00:05:28,342 --> 00:05:30,176
but it's almost effortless.
167
00:05:30,210 --> 00:05:31,243
Yeah, no,
I knew all of that.
168
00:05:31,244 --> 00:05:32,243
I meant the money thing.
169
00:05:32,245 --> 00:05:34,146
Oh. My first impression
170
00:05:34,147 --> 00:05:37,450
is that you have a debilitating
spending problem.
171
00:05:37,451 --> 00:05:39,923
Jake, you have
six massage chairs.
172
00:05:39,953 --> 00:05:41,633
Well, they don't make
a massage couch.
173
00:05:41,655 --> 00:05:44,427
Okay, but you also have
three turntables.
174
00:05:44,458 --> 00:05:46,859
Ooh, yeah!
I'm learning how to spin.
175
00:05:46,893 --> 00:05:48,527
Check it out.
176
00:05:48,562 --> 00:05:49,862
[Scatting]
177
00:05:49,863 --> 00:05:51,864
[Chaotic klezmer
music playing]
178
00:05:51,865 --> 00:05:54,267
All I have are my grandma's
old klezmer records,
179
00:05:54,268 --> 00:05:55,735
and I still haven't
quite figured out
180
00:05:55,736 --> 00:05:57,803
how to sync up the beats,
but it's not bad, right?
181
00:05:57,804 --> 00:05:58,971
It's awful!
182
00:05:59,006 --> 00:06:02,074
It sounds like joy behar
falling down some stairs.
183
00:06:02,109 --> 00:06:03,809
[Music stops]
Okay, you also purchased
184
00:06:03,810 --> 00:06:07,513
Olympus Has Fallen
on demand 12 times.
185
00:06:07,514 --> 00:06:10,116
Was it a difficult movie
for you to follow?
186
00:06:10,117 --> 00:06:11,450
No, just watched it a lot.
187
00:06:11,451 --> 00:06:12,952
So hit me.
188
00:06:12,953 --> 00:06:15,208
How much do I have to cut back
in order to keep this place?
189
00:06:15,222 --> 00:06:17,890
Infinity percent.
190
00:06:17,891 --> 00:06:20,422
Technically speaking,
you're bankrupt, kiddo.
191
00:06:20,427 --> 00:06:21,727
That sounds bad.
192
00:06:21,762 --> 00:06:22,995
It is bad.
193
00:06:22,996 --> 00:06:25,302
I only said "kiddo"
to soften the blow, kiddo.
194
00:06:27,897 --> 00:06:29,098
This is so unfair.
195
00:06:29,099 --> 00:06:30,599
I've lived in this building
15 years,
196
00:06:30,600 --> 00:06:32,167
and then all of the sudden,
they decide they're going co-op
197
00:06:32,168 --> 00:06:33,335
with zero warning?
198
00:06:33,336 --> 00:06:34,503
It seems illegal
199
00:06:34,504 --> 00:06:36,071
they didn't tell you
this was happening.
200
00:06:36,072 --> 00:06:37,606
Well, it's possible
I missed a letter,
201
00:06:37,607 --> 00:06:38,641
but I doubt it.
202
00:06:38,642 --> 00:06:40,309
Ooh, let's check
the mail tub.
203
00:06:40,343 --> 00:06:41,510
Mail tub?
204
00:06:41,511 --> 00:06:42,811
Nope. No.
205
00:06:42,812 --> 00:06:44,146
No.
206
00:06:44,147 --> 00:06:46,849
See? It's impossible
to find anything in here.
207
00:06:46,850 --> 00:06:48,083
It's not my fault.
208
00:06:48,084 --> 00:06:49,418
This is actually
a cool little bathroom.
209
00:06:49,419 --> 00:06:51,153
Nice claw-foot tub.
210
00:06:51,187 --> 00:06:53,555
Which I will never throw
my mail into again.
211
00:06:53,556 --> 00:06:55,157
Unless...
212
00:06:55,158 --> 00:06:56,959
I didn't want to do this,
but I do know one way
213
00:06:56,960 --> 00:06:57,960
we could get the money.
214
00:06:57,961 --> 00:06:59,728
You'd make
a decent prostitute.
215
00:06:59,729 --> 00:07:01,563
I'd make an amazing prostitute.
216
00:07:01,564 --> 00:07:04,266
But I was actually talking
about this guy I know, Frank.
217
00:07:04,267 --> 00:07:07,002
He's kinda skeevy, but he will
loan money to anybody.
218
00:07:07,037 --> 00:07:08,704
So he's a loan shark.
219
00:07:08,705 --> 00:07:10,339
Maybe you're not
thinking this through.
220
00:07:10,340 --> 00:07:12,675
Says the woman who's been
engaged eight times.
221
00:07:12,676 --> 00:07:14,543
Uh, but never married once.
222
00:07:14,544 --> 00:07:16,345
Game, set, match... linetti.
223
00:07:16,346 --> 00:07:18,380
Well, it's the only choice
I have.
224
00:07:18,381 --> 00:07:20,449
So let's go.
225
00:07:20,483 --> 00:07:23,419
(Terry) Sir, I know we got off
to a weird start,
226
00:07:23,453 --> 00:07:25,220
so to get things
back on track,
227
00:07:25,221 --> 00:07:27,489
I'd like to bring in
Santiago next.
228
00:07:27,490 --> 00:07:28,657
She's had a great year.
229
00:07:28,692 --> 00:07:29,892
You wanted
to see me, sirs?
230
00:07:29,926 --> 00:07:31,093
I was reading
the sergeant's lips
231
00:07:31,094 --> 00:07:32,394
through the window,
and he either said,
232
00:07:32,395 --> 00:07:34,029
"bring in Santiago next,"
233
00:07:34,030 --> 00:07:36,623
or something
about a San Diego nest.
234
00:07:36,633 --> 00:07:38,541
Are you ready
for your self-evaluation?
235
00:07:38,568 --> 00:07:41,002
I am.
236
00:07:41,004 --> 00:07:43,906
I understand from a lip-reading
session last week
237
00:07:43,907 --> 00:07:47,050
that you intend to ask us
each ten questions.
238
00:07:47,077 --> 00:07:48,310
Normally, yes,
239
00:07:48,311 --> 00:07:52,414
but for you, I have
just one question.
240
00:07:52,449 --> 00:07:54,116
What is your biggest...
241
00:07:54,117 --> 00:07:56,752
Flaw?
242
00:07:56,753 --> 00:07:59,187
My biggest flaw?
243
00:07:59,189 --> 00:08:02,825
Working too hard?
244
00:08:02,826 --> 00:08:05,461
Being too thorough?
245
00:08:05,495 --> 00:08:08,631
Caring too much?
246
00:08:08,632 --> 00:08:09,832
Got it.
247
00:08:09,833 --> 00:08:11,867
Something entirely different.
248
00:08:14,070 --> 00:08:15,638
Rosa, look!
249
00:08:15,639 --> 00:08:16,830
Lohank is shaving
right now.
250
00:08:16,840 --> 00:08:19,808
[Shady music]
251
00:08:19,843 --> 00:08:21,084
[Razor buzzing]
252
00:08:21,111 --> 00:08:27,082
♪ ♪
253
00:08:27,083 --> 00:08:29,092
[Slow-motion whoosh]
254
00:08:29,119 --> 00:08:34,806
Both, in slow-motion: Noooo!
255
00:08:34,824 --> 00:08:36,125
Boyle, call an ambulance.
256
00:08:36,126 --> 00:08:37,475
I'm gonna do
some stuff to him.
257
00:08:37,494 --> 00:08:40,162
Or we give him a taste
of his own medicine.
258
00:08:40,163 --> 00:08:41,497
We fill his locker
with shaving cream
259
00:08:41,498 --> 00:08:43,532
and loose hair.
260
00:08:43,533 --> 00:08:44,833
I like it.
261
00:08:44,834 --> 00:08:46,735
I cannot believe
I am considering
262
00:08:46,736 --> 00:08:48,070
a non-violent option.
263
00:08:48,071 --> 00:08:51,197
And I know just where to get
a bundle of loose hair.
264
00:08:51,207 --> 00:08:53,575
(Gina) How much interest
do you charge?
265
00:08:53,610 --> 00:08:55,010
Look, I'm not a bank.
266
00:08:55,045 --> 00:08:56,478
It's my own personal money.
267
00:08:56,513 --> 00:08:58,814
So I take a larger vig.
268
00:08:58,815 --> 00:08:59,815
20 points.
269
00:08:59,849 --> 00:09:01,417
A "vig." So cool.
270
00:09:01,418 --> 00:09:02,885
Well, I don't need much.
271
00:09:02,886 --> 00:09:05,128
Just, like, $430,000.
272
00:09:05,155 --> 00:09:06,555
Nah, too much.
273
00:09:06,556 --> 00:09:10,326
I make small loans
to desperate losers.
274
00:09:10,327 --> 00:09:12,302
And friends, like you.
275
00:09:12,329 --> 00:09:13,696
Well, I'm happy
this went terribly.
276
00:09:13,697 --> 00:09:16,098
Uh, we do have to go now,
so please excuse us.
277
00:09:16,099 --> 00:09:18,767
Wait, I just need enough
to show the co-op board
278
00:09:18,768 --> 00:09:20,336
I can make a down payment
at the bank.
279
00:09:20,370 --> 00:09:21,895
How about $20,000?
280
00:09:21,905 --> 00:09:23,672
Two bags of ziti?
281
00:09:23,673 --> 00:09:25,040
That I can do.
282
00:09:25,041 --> 00:09:26,909
[Gasps]
"Bags of ziti?"
283
00:09:26,910 --> 00:09:28,811
Come on, Gina,
how awesome is that?
284
00:09:28,812 --> 00:09:29,878
Get on board.
285
00:09:29,913 --> 00:09:31,905
Come on, Gina.
Get on board.
286
00:09:31,915 --> 00:09:34,083
Jake, he is a sea witch
in disguise.
287
00:09:34,084 --> 00:09:35,909
Do not sing into his shell.
288
00:09:35,919 --> 00:09:38,520
I have no idea what you're
talking about right now.
289
00:09:38,521 --> 00:09:40,222
Oh, little mermaid.
290
00:09:40,223 --> 00:09:41,924
What have you done?
291
00:09:41,958 --> 00:09:43,392
[Shady music]
292
00:09:43,426 --> 00:09:44,834
Oh, yeah.
293
00:09:44,861 --> 00:09:46,377
Wow.
294
00:09:46,396 --> 00:09:48,564
Nothing gets you smiling
like cold-blooded vengeance.
295
00:09:48,598 --> 00:09:50,381
[Laughs]
296
00:09:50,400 --> 00:09:54,570
And now,
the piece de resistance.
297
00:09:54,571 --> 00:09:56,471
Emilio's giant bag of hair.
298
00:09:56,473 --> 00:09:57,740
[Chuckles]
299
00:09:57,774 --> 00:10:00,609
Oh, this is disgusting.
300
00:10:00,610 --> 00:10:01,643
It's perfect.
[Squeals]
301
00:10:01,645 --> 00:10:02,745
Ugh.
Ugh.
302
00:10:02,779 --> 00:10:05,547
[Giggles]
Ooh, check... check this out.
303
00:10:08,184 --> 00:10:10,693
I'm Tom Selleck.
Park my chopper on the beach.
304
00:10:10,720 --> 00:10:12,254
[Laughing]
305
00:10:12,255 --> 00:10:15,323
I'm a Billy goat.
[Bleats]
306
00:10:15,325 --> 00:10:16,825
[Bleats loudly, snorts]
307
00:10:16,826 --> 00:10:19,528
Oh!
[Coughing]
308
00:10:19,529 --> 00:10:22,097
Oh, I think I swallowed
a bunch of stranger hair.
309
00:10:22,098 --> 00:10:23,498
Ugh!
310
00:10:23,500 --> 00:10:24,874
(Jake)
Hey.
311
00:10:24,901 --> 00:10:26,835
Mr. Henders,
the King of the lobby.
312
00:10:26,870 --> 00:10:29,738
Jake, the co-op board meeting
was an hour ago.
313
00:10:29,773 --> 00:10:31,589
I know.
I am so sorry.
314
00:10:31,608 --> 00:10:34,643
It's just I've been pretty busy
with police work, you know,
315
00:10:34,644 --> 00:10:36,211
with my police friends,
316
00:10:36,212 --> 00:10:39,014
helping out non-police folk
such as yourself,
317
00:10:39,015 --> 00:10:41,016
keeping you safe police.
318
00:10:41,017 --> 00:10:42,017
We appreciate your service.
319
00:10:42,018 --> 00:10:43,319
And I appreciate you
saying that.
320
00:10:43,320 --> 00:10:45,120
Look, I know there's been
a lot of misconceptions
321
00:10:45,121 --> 00:10:46,622
about my financial situation,
322
00:10:46,656 --> 00:10:49,224
but I am ready to put that
to rest right now.
323
00:10:49,225 --> 00:10:50,984
Boom goes the dynamite.
Oh, my God.
324
00:10:50,994 --> 00:10:52,861
That's $20,000 right there,
325
00:10:52,862 --> 00:10:55,113
and I intend to use it
as a down payment on a mortgage.
326
00:10:55,131 --> 00:10:56,465
Where did you get this money?
327
00:10:56,499 --> 00:10:57,533
Just had it lying around.
328
00:10:57,567 --> 00:10:59,033
You've been
an adequate tenant.
329
00:10:59,035 --> 00:11:00,910
Adequate.
But we needed a completed application
330
00:11:00,937 --> 00:11:02,471
with a bank loan by today.
331
00:11:02,505 --> 00:11:04,640
With all due respect, sir,
that's not fair.
332
00:11:04,641 --> 00:11:05,908
I mean, I didn't even know
that the building
333
00:11:05,909 --> 00:11:07,176
was going co-op
until last week.
334
00:11:07,177 --> 00:11:08,209
I got one letter.
335
00:11:08,211 --> 00:11:10,086
We left you 15 voicemails
as well.
336
00:11:10,113 --> 00:11:11,914
Ah, voicemails.
Well, that explains it.
337
00:11:11,915 --> 00:11:14,116
My generation mostly texts.
338
00:11:14,117 --> 00:11:15,925
I'm only 33, so...
339
00:11:15,952 --> 00:11:17,468
We're in the same generation.
I'm 31.
340
00:11:17,487 --> 00:11:18,887
31?
Mm-hmm.
341
00:11:18,888 --> 00:11:20,346
But I call you "mister."
342
00:11:20,357 --> 00:11:23,125
And you wear a suit, and...
343
00:11:23,126 --> 00:11:24,693
That.
344
00:11:24,694 --> 00:11:26,436
Did you just point
at my bald spot?
345
00:11:26,463 --> 00:11:27,729
No.
Look.
346
00:11:27,731 --> 00:11:29,397
We're putting the apartment
on the market.
347
00:11:29,399 --> 00:11:31,133
We need to get it ready
for brokers to show.
348
00:11:31,134 --> 00:11:32,902
We need you out
by next friday.
349
00:11:32,936 --> 00:11:35,070
Ohhh, next friday's
a little tough for me.
350
00:11:35,071 --> 00:11:36,672
Is there any way
we could move it
351
00:11:36,673 --> 00:11:38,841
to the sunday after
eight years from next friday?
352
00:11:40,510 --> 00:11:41,810
Based on your judge-y eyes,
353
00:11:41,811 --> 00:11:44,680
I am going to take back
my dynamite.
354
00:11:44,681 --> 00:11:46,248
Un-boom.
355
00:11:46,249 --> 00:11:47,248
Un-boom.
356
00:11:47,250 --> 00:11:49,417
You got a full head...
Head of hair.
357
00:11:49,419 --> 00:11:51,253
Nope.
Okay.
358
00:11:55,351 --> 00:11:57,119
Aw, that bad?
359
00:11:57,120 --> 00:11:58,520
I'm gonna be homeless.
360
00:11:58,521 --> 00:11:59,955
A homeless cop.
361
00:11:59,956 --> 00:12:01,289
It's like a made-for-TV movie
362
00:12:01,290 --> 00:12:02,457
that I will not be able
to watch
363
00:12:02,458 --> 00:12:03,725
because I won't have
a television
364
00:12:03,726 --> 00:12:05,093
because I'll be homeless.
365
00:12:05,094 --> 00:12:06,595
Chin up, lil' pup.
366
00:12:06,596 --> 00:12:08,296
First of all, you could
watch it on your phone.
367
00:12:08,297 --> 00:12:11,433
Second, this isn't the only
apartment in the city.
368
00:12:11,434 --> 00:12:12,601
We'll find you a new one.
369
00:12:12,602 --> 00:12:14,770
You're right.
370
00:12:14,771 --> 00:12:16,204
You're right.
This could be good.
371
00:12:16,205 --> 00:12:17,639
I mean, maybe we'll find
a great place.
372
00:12:17,674 --> 00:12:19,675
Atta girl.
In a cooler neighborhood.
373
00:12:19,709 --> 00:12:20,782
That's right, girl.
374
00:12:20,810 --> 00:12:22,310
Maybe I'll even have
a cute neighbor.
375
00:12:22,345 --> 00:12:23,618
Get it, girl.
376
00:12:23,646 --> 00:12:25,080
You gotta stop
calling me girl.
377
00:12:25,114 --> 00:12:27,349
Sorry, girl.
378
00:12:27,383 --> 00:12:28,717
(Amy)
Okay, sirs.
379
00:12:28,718 --> 00:12:31,353
I know why you weren't happy
with my self-evaluation.
380
00:12:31,387 --> 00:12:32,521
You didn't want me
to say a flaw
381
00:12:32,555 --> 00:12:33,955
that was actually positive,
382
00:12:33,956 --> 00:12:35,791
like how the sergeant
always says it's bad
383
00:12:35,792 --> 00:12:37,298
that he works out too much.
384
00:12:37,327 --> 00:12:39,161
Whoa. Why the drive-by?
385
00:12:39,162 --> 00:12:40,161
Sorry.
386
00:12:40,163 --> 00:12:41,663
But that's not right,
387
00:12:41,664 --> 00:12:45,400
because you value honesty
and humility above all else.
388
00:12:45,401 --> 00:12:47,269
So what's your biggest flaw?
389
00:12:47,303 --> 00:12:48,970
My biggest flaw.
390
00:12:48,971 --> 00:12:50,978
I'm too competitive,
prone to jealousy,
391
00:12:51,007 --> 00:12:52,441
"bit of a killjoy,
392
00:12:52,475 --> 00:12:53,648
"follow rules to a fault,
393
00:12:53,676 --> 00:12:54,776
"don't know how to relax,
394
00:12:54,777 --> 00:12:59,181
and every now and then,
I smoke a cigarette."
395
00:12:59,182 --> 00:13:00,488
Is that what
you're looking for?
396
00:13:00,516 --> 00:13:01,984
Because I can keep going.
397
00:13:01,985 --> 00:13:03,251
I am deeply flawed.
398
00:13:03,286 --> 00:13:05,387
Santiago...
Oh, no.
399
00:13:05,421 --> 00:13:06,955
"Santiago" in "B" flat.
400
00:13:06,990 --> 00:13:08,056
You're disappointed.
401
00:13:08,091 --> 00:13:09,558
Okay, well,
402
00:13:09,559 --> 00:13:11,493
I'm going to go
to a secret location
403
00:13:11,494 --> 00:13:12,861
and make sure that nobody
is smoking there.
404
00:13:12,862 --> 00:13:14,463
I'll be right back.
405
00:13:14,464 --> 00:13:15,463
[Door slams]
406
00:13:15,465 --> 00:13:17,171
(Gina)
Is this a pre-war?
407
00:13:17,200 --> 00:13:18,367
Ah, very good eye.
408
00:13:18,368 --> 00:13:20,341
And you should know
it's also pet-friendly.
409
00:13:20,370 --> 00:13:23,138
Really?
Do they allow cats?
410
00:13:23,172 --> 00:13:25,179
I can't tell if you're
being sarcastic.
411
00:13:25,208 --> 00:13:26,208
Okay.
412
00:13:26,209 --> 00:13:30,579
How would you even
get a bed in here?
413
00:13:30,613 --> 00:13:32,781
Oh, Murphy bed.
414
00:13:32,782 --> 00:13:33,781
Voila.
415
00:13:33,783 --> 00:13:34,950
Nope.
416
00:13:34,984 --> 00:13:36,685
This is kinda cool.
417
00:13:36,686 --> 00:13:38,453
High ceilings,
so many windows.
418
00:13:38,488 --> 00:13:40,022
Gina, the toilet is
419
00:13:40,023 --> 00:13:42,624
in the middle
of the living room.
420
00:13:42,659 --> 00:13:43,792
I think it's sexy.
421
00:13:43,826 --> 00:13:45,366
[Gasps]
422
00:13:45,395 --> 00:13:47,535
Aah!
423
00:13:47,563 --> 00:13:48,930
(Rosa)
So when's this going down?
424
00:13:48,965 --> 00:13:50,632
Well, normally, lohank hits
the locker room
425
00:13:50,633 --> 00:13:51,873
when he goes to the gym,
426
00:13:51,901 --> 00:13:54,670
so let's see when he plans
on working out.
427
00:13:54,704 --> 00:13:56,471
So, lohank,
I was reading an article
428
00:13:56,506 --> 00:13:58,173
about the benefits
of exercise...
429
00:13:58,174 --> 00:13:59,441
You going to the gym today?
430
00:13:59,475 --> 00:14:01,048
Not today. Been spending
all my breaks on the phone
431
00:14:01,077 --> 00:14:02,678
with my wife, Nancy.
432
00:14:02,712 --> 00:14:04,479
We've been having
marital problems.
433
00:14:04,514 --> 00:14:05,847
Right, 'cause of your hygiene?
434
00:14:05,882 --> 00:14:08,750
What? No, I wish.
435
00:14:08,751 --> 00:14:10,652
No, about a year ago,
she fell down the stairs
436
00:14:10,653 --> 00:14:11,954
and broke her back.
437
00:14:11,988 --> 00:14:13,188
Oh, no.
438
00:14:13,222 --> 00:14:14,690
Now she's addicted
to painkillers.
439
00:14:14,724 --> 00:14:16,230
We've been fighting a lot.
Mm.
440
00:14:16,259 --> 00:14:18,527
'Cause I want to help her,
you know?
441
00:14:18,528 --> 00:14:20,996
I guess I just love her
so much.
442
00:14:20,997 --> 00:14:22,631
But she's refusing treatment.
443
00:14:22,665 --> 00:14:23,905
Ohhh.
444
00:14:23,933 --> 00:14:25,300
We got into it again
last night.
445
00:14:25,335 --> 00:14:27,536
I went out
for some fresh air,
446
00:14:27,570 --> 00:14:29,171
but I forgot
to close the door,
447
00:14:29,172 --> 00:14:30,539
and our dog cinnamon
got out.
448
00:14:30,573 --> 00:14:31,707
Oh, no.
449
00:14:31,741 --> 00:14:33,809
Cinnamon got hit
by a drunk driver.
450
00:14:33,843 --> 00:14:35,249
I wish I could say
451
00:14:35,278 --> 00:14:36,878
she was put out of her misery
instantly,
452
00:14:36,879 --> 00:14:39,281
but the vet assured us
that her suffering
453
00:14:39,282 --> 00:14:42,050
was unending and terrible.
454
00:14:42,085 --> 00:14:43,085
I'm sorry.
455
00:14:43,119 --> 00:14:44,853
Just venting a little.
I-I appreciate...
456
00:14:44,887 --> 00:14:47,256
Of course.
457
00:14:47,257 --> 00:14:48,657
Anything for a good friend
like you.
458
00:14:48,658 --> 00:14:50,158
Charles, can I see you
for a minute?
459
00:14:50,193 --> 00:14:51,560
Yep.
460
00:14:51,594 --> 00:14:53,462
My first question is,
461
00:14:53,463 --> 00:14:56,832
why are the two of you doing
this self-evaluation together?
462
00:14:56,866 --> 00:14:58,967
Scully doesn't handle
pressure well.
463
00:14:58,968 --> 00:15:00,869
[Sighs shakily]
Um...
464
00:15:00,870 --> 00:15:02,271
Um...
Not to brag,
465
00:15:02,272 --> 00:15:04,139
but Scully and I have
a combined total
466
00:15:04,140 --> 00:15:07,209
of 14 arrests.
467
00:15:07,243 --> 00:15:09,177
Would've been 20,
but we only got 14.
468
00:15:09,212 --> 00:15:10,252
That's not enough arrests.
469
00:15:10,280 --> 00:15:11,980
Well, no one asked you.
470
00:15:11,981 --> 00:15:13,415
It's a self-evaluation.
471
00:15:13,449 --> 00:15:16,451
Come on, Scully.
472
00:15:19,255 --> 00:15:20,522
I'm trying to hurry,
473
00:15:20,523 --> 00:15:22,129
but when you grab the hair,
it breaks apart.
474
00:15:22,158 --> 00:15:24,493
The key is you use your hands
like scoopers.
475
00:15:24,494 --> 00:15:26,428
Just go...
476
00:15:26,462 --> 00:15:27,563
Ugh.
477
00:15:27,564 --> 00:15:29,197
(Holt)
What the hell is going on here?
478
00:15:29,232 --> 00:15:31,305
I'm sure there's a reasonable
explanation for this, sir.
479
00:15:31,334 --> 00:15:34,202
Uh, we accidentally dropped
all our loose hair
480
00:15:34,203 --> 00:15:35,437
and shaving cream
in this locker,
481
00:15:35,438 --> 00:15:36,572
so we're cleaning it out.
482
00:15:36,606 --> 00:15:38,407
Hasn't Detective lohank
been through enough?
483
00:15:38,408 --> 00:15:40,742
He just got diagnosed
with prostate cancer.
484
00:15:40,777 --> 00:15:41,777
Course he did.
485
00:15:41,778 --> 00:15:44,112
Clean this up. Now.
486
00:15:44,113 --> 00:15:47,115
Yes, sir.
487
00:15:49,319 --> 00:15:50,752
What's wrong with you guys?
488
00:15:50,787 --> 00:15:53,622
I've lost control
of my squad.
489
00:15:53,656 --> 00:15:55,290
(Gina)
Should we turn some lights on?
490
00:15:55,325 --> 00:15:57,059
Trying to save
electricity, Gina.
491
00:15:57,093 --> 00:15:58,760
Your massage chair is on.
492
00:15:58,795 --> 00:16:01,168
Yeah, I'm poor.
I'm not a savage.
493
00:16:01,197 --> 00:16:02,670
Man, what am I gonna do?
494
00:16:02,699 --> 00:16:04,633
Well, what if I bought
the apartment?
495
00:16:04,667 --> 00:16:06,101
[Scoffs]
What are you talking about?
496
00:16:06,102 --> 00:16:07,870
And then I could rent it
to you till you find
497
00:16:07,871 --> 00:16:08,904
a new place.
498
00:16:08,938 --> 00:16:10,038
What?
499
00:16:10,039 --> 00:16:11,206
How could you afford
this place?
500
00:16:11,207 --> 00:16:12,441
Have you been
dealing drugs?
501
00:16:12,475 --> 00:16:13,942
No, I'm thrifty.
502
00:16:13,943 --> 00:16:16,245
I cut my own hair.
I walk to work.
503
00:16:16,246 --> 00:16:17,980
I eat Scully's lunch
every day.
504
00:16:18,014 --> 00:16:20,949
I've rented the same
crap box since I was 20
505
00:16:20,984 --> 00:16:22,551
'cause it's so cheap.
506
00:16:22,552 --> 00:16:24,019
I've saved up money,
507
00:16:24,020 --> 00:16:26,027
and I'm looking for
a real estate opportunity.
508
00:16:26,055 --> 00:16:28,156
Ew. A real estate
opportunity?
509
00:16:28,157 --> 00:16:29,424
Are you being serious?
510
00:16:29,425 --> 00:16:31,093
We were drinking 40's
this morning.
511
00:16:31,127 --> 00:16:33,028
I'm saying I could
give you a fair rent
512
00:16:33,029 --> 00:16:34,463
because I would be
your landlady.
513
00:16:34,497 --> 00:16:36,932
Whoa, whoa,
you be my landlady?
514
00:16:36,966 --> 00:16:38,000
You're Gina.
515
00:16:38,034 --> 00:16:39,034
Your lifelong dream
516
00:16:39,035 --> 00:16:40,302
is to be on wife swap.
517
00:16:40,303 --> 00:16:41,803
You call gum "the dentist."
518
00:16:41,804 --> 00:16:43,711
You think Ray J
is a national treasure.
519
00:16:43,740 --> 00:16:46,008
Yeah, so what?
I'm eclectic.
520
00:16:46,042 --> 00:16:48,343
You're not better
than me, okay?
521
00:16:48,344 --> 00:16:50,412
And I'm glad
that I still own this place
522
00:16:50,413 --> 00:16:52,848
because I can happily
invite you to leave.
523
00:16:52,882 --> 00:16:55,484
[Laughs]
Grow up, Jake.
524
00:16:55,518 --> 00:16:56,985
[Imitating gina]
"Grow up, Jake."
525
00:16:57,020 --> 00:16:58,019
Oh, my goodness.
526
00:16:58,021 --> 00:17:00,289
Yeah, thanks for your help.
527
00:17:00,290 --> 00:17:02,090
Old-school styles.
528
00:17:02,091 --> 00:17:03,859
I take back the "Z"!
529
00:17:05,970 --> 00:17:07,370
[Sighs]
530
00:17:07,371 --> 00:17:08,371
Whoa, you okay?
531
00:17:08,372 --> 00:17:09,472
Yep.
532
00:17:09,473 --> 00:17:12,742
Just checking out
my new bedroom.
533
00:17:12,743 --> 00:17:13,876
Oh, good.
534
00:17:13,877 --> 00:17:15,211
It feels like scoliosis
535
00:17:15,212 --> 00:17:17,146
and smells like
10 million butts.
536
00:17:17,147 --> 00:17:19,121
I take it your apartment thing
didn't work out.
537
00:17:19,149 --> 00:17:21,117
When did everyone decide
to become an adult?
538
00:17:21,118 --> 00:17:22,552
I mean, I know you were born
in your fifties,
539
00:17:22,553 --> 00:17:23,552
but come on.
540
00:17:23,554 --> 00:17:24,554
Thanks?
541
00:17:24,555 --> 00:17:25,788
Get this.
542
00:17:25,789 --> 00:17:27,490
Gina just offered
to buy Nana's apartment
543
00:17:27,491 --> 00:17:29,158
as a real estate opportunity
544
00:17:29,159 --> 00:17:30,593
and become my "landlady."
545
00:17:30,628 --> 00:17:31,995
Jake...
I know.
546
00:17:31,996 --> 00:17:33,329
She was just trying
to help,
547
00:17:33,330 --> 00:17:34,497
but we've known each other
since we were kids,
548
00:17:34,498 --> 00:17:35,498
you know?
549
00:17:35,499 --> 00:17:36,733
I got her her job.
550
00:17:36,734 --> 00:17:38,801
Which an ice cream cone
could do, by the way.
551
00:17:38,802 --> 00:17:41,037
And now I find out she's been
saving all these years?
552
00:17:41,071 --> 00:17:42,605
Jake...
I know.
553
00:17:42,606 --> 00:17:44,107
The person that I'm
really mad at is myself
554
00:17:44,108 --> 00:17:46,142
for screwing
this whole thing up.
555
00:17:46,143 --> 00:17:48,545
I gotta talk to Gina.
Thanks for your help, Amy.
556
00:17:48,579 --> 00:17:49,646
Didn't say anything,
don't want credit
557
00:17:49,647 --> 00:17:50,980
in case it goes wrong.
558
00:17:50,981 --> 00:17:52,582
Yeah, that's smart,
given my track record.
559
00:17:52,616 --> 00:17:54,417
Hey, wait.
560
00:17:54,418 --> 00:17:56,619
What would you say Holt
thinks my biggest flaw is?
561
00:17:56,654 --> 00:17:57,887
Who care what Holt thinks?
562
00:17:57,922 --> 00:17:59,389
What's most important
563
00:17:59,423 --> 00:18:01,257
is what I think
your biggest flaw is.
564
00:18:01,258 --> 00:18:02,926
And there are so many
to choose from...
565
00:18:02,927 --> 00:18:05,194
Too competitive,
prone to jealousy,
566
00:18:05,195 --> 00:18:06,462
bit of a killjoy,
567
00:18:06,463 --> 00:18:07,764
your shame cigarettes.
568
00:18:07,798 --> 00:18:11,034
Oh, my God.
But your biggest flaw is...
569
00:18:11,035 --> 00:18:12,969
You suck at throwing away
your secret lists.
570
00:18:16,373 --> 00:18:17,874
Well, that was fun today.
571
00:18:17,875 --> 00:18:20,176
Although I'm pretty sure
I caught some form of face lice
572
00:18:20,177 --> 00:18:21,311
from that bag of hair.
573
00:18:21,312 --> 00:18:22,979
Being a cop is dangerous.
574
00:18:22,980 --> 00:18:24,113
Although I knew that
going in.
575
00:18:24,114 --> 00:18:26,449
Yeah, it was fun.
Hey, you wanna grab a drink?
576
00:18:26,450 --> 00:18:27,951
Oh, shoot, I would,
but I'm meeting Vivian
577
00:18:27,952 --> 00:18:29,313
for that romantic
pig colon dinner.
578
00:18:29,320 --> 00:18:31,120
[Sighs]
Hey, Rosa.
579
00:18:31,155 --> 00:18:32,488
I want to apologize.
580
00:18:32,489 --> 00:18:34,090
I haven't been much fun
to hang out with
581
00:18:34,091 --> 00:18:35,191
over the last year or so
582
00:18:35,192 --> 00:18:36,793
on account of all
the asking you out
583
00:18:36,794 --> 00:18:37,994
and smelling your hair
584
00:18:37,995 --> 00:18:39,635
and staring at you
from point-blank range.
585
00:18:39,663 --> 00:18:41,965
Yeah, you were a real weirdo.
Mm-hmm.
586
00:18:41,966 --> 00:18:43,132
But you're pretty cool
587
00:18:43,133 --> 00:18:44,734
now that you're in love
with someone else.
588
00:18:44,735 --> 00:18:45,802
Have a nice dinner.
589
00:18:45,836 --> 00:18:47,270
Oh, we will.
590
00:18:47,304 --> 00:18:48,905
They make a sorbet
out of the tail.
591
00:18:48,906 --> 00:18:51,741
See ya.
592
00:18:51,742 --> 00:18:54,911
Excuse me, Captain.
593
00:18:54,912 --> 00:18:55,912
What are you doing, sergeant?
594
00:18:55,913 --> 00:18:57,313
I'm going to yell at you,
595
00:18:57,314 --> 00:18:59,221
and I don't want Santiago
to read my lips.
596
00:18:59,250 --> 00:19:00,249
Excuse me?
597
00:19:00,251 --> 00:19:02,418
You were completely unfair
598
00:19:02,419 --> 00:19:03,418
to my squad today.
599
00:19:03,420 --> 00:19:04,521
Santiago is one
600
00:19:04,555 --> 00:19:06,289
of your best detectives.
601
00:19:06,290 --> 00:19:09,425
And all you wanted to do was
play mind games with her.
602
00:19:09,426 --> 00:19:11,961
Scully and Hitchcock
only arrested 14 people,
603
00:19:11,962 --> 00:19:13,530
but that's 8 more
than last year.
604
00:19:13,564 --> 00:19:15,365
They only arrested
6 people last year?
605
00:19:15,399 --> 00:19:17,066
And I know Peralta
can be childish,
606
00:19:17,067 --> 00:19:19,035
but he leads the precinct
in collars,
607
00:19:19,036 --> 00:19:21,304
and he's grown up a heck
of a lot since you got here.
608
00:19:21,338 --> 00:19:23,039
Okay, sit down, sergeant.
609
00:19:23,040 --> 00:19:25,074
I'm going to do
your evaluation now.
610
00:19:29,046 --> 00:19:30,313
Sergeant Jeffords,
611
00:19:30,347 --> 00:19:31,514
you're right.
612
00:19:31,515 --> 00:19:33,683
I have been hard
on the squad.
613
00:19:33,684 --> 00:19:34,851
You're a good leader.
614
00:19:34,885 --> 00:19:36,553
And just the fact
that you're willing
615
00:19:36,587 --> 00:19:38,721
to stand up for them
is one of the reasons
616
00:19:38,722 --> 00:19:40,156
they respect you so much.
617
00:19:40,191 --> 00:19:42,431
I could learn something
from you.
618
00:19:42,459 --> 00:19:45,762
You have every right
to feel like, um,
619
00:19:45,763 --> 00:19:47,564
um, what was it
you said this morning?
620
00:19:47,598 --> 00:19:49,032
Proud mama hen, sir.
621
00:19:49,066 --> 00:19:50,900
A proud...
622
00:19:50,901 --> 00:19:54,037
Mama hen.
623
00:19:54,071 --> 00:19:57,106
[Knock at door]
624
00:19:57,107 --> 00:19:58,408
What do you want, Jake?
625
00:19:58,409 --> 00:20:00,043
I'm watching Oprah's
legends ball,
626
00:20:00,044 --> 00:20:01,911
which is what I do
every time a close friend
627
00:20:01,912 --> 00:20:03,079
hurts my feelings.
628
00:20:03,113 --> 00:20:06,616
I came here to apologize.
629
00:20:06,617 --> 00:20:08,551
Look, I was mad at you
630
00:20:08,586 --> 00:20:10,553
for being more together than me,
and that's not fair.
631
00:20:10,588 --> 00:20:11,955
I felt stupid,
so I acted out.
632
00:20:11,956 --> 00:20:12,962
I'm sorry.
633
00:20:12,990 --> 00:20:14,491
Yeah, you were stupid,
634
00:20:14,492 --> 00:20:16,526
and you should be sorry, Jake.
635
00:20:16,527 --> 00:20:18,795
But watching Oprah
have brunch
636
00:20:18,796 --> 00:20:21,531
with her strong woman friends
637
00:20:21,532 --> 00:20:23,466
has taught me that
it's okay to forgive.
638
00:20:23,467 --> 00:20:24,601
Great.
639
00:20:24,602 --> 00:20:26,308
Also, you should buy
Nana's place.
640
00:20:26,337 --> 00:20:27,403
Not for me.
641
00:20:27,438 --> 00:20:28,805
You should live there.
642
00:20:28,806 --> 00:20:30,473
You love that apartment,
and you said so yourself.
643
00:20:30,474 --> 00:20:31,480
It's a great investment.
644
00:20:31,509 --> 00:20:32,575
Where are you gonna live?
645
00:20:32,610 --> 00:20:33,843
Here.
646
00:20:33,844 --> 00:20:35,011
I'll sublet from you.
647
00:20:35,012 --> 00:20:36,318
I actually ran the numbers.
648
00:20:36,347 --> 00:20:37,680
I'd keep paying
the same amount of rent,
649
00:20:37,681 --> 00:20:39,215
and you would turn
a small profit.
650
00:20:39,250 --> 00:20:40,950
It's a starter apartment,
and it's my fault
651
00:20:40,951 --> 00:20:42,719
for starting when I'm 33.
652
00:20:42,753 --> 00:20:44,554
[Laughs]
653
00:20:44,555 --> 00:20:46,055
You have a deal.
All right.
654
00:20:46,090 --> 00:20:47,329
Shake, shake.
655
00:20:47,358 --> 00:20:48,758
Yes!
656
00:20:48,793 --> 00:20:49,793
[Knock at door]
657
00:20:49,794 --> 00:20:50,833
Hello, Detective.
658
00:20:50,861 --> 00:20:52,061
Is there a reason
659
00:20:52,096 --> 00:20:53,997
you're interrupting me
mid-soup?
660
00:20:53,998 --> 00:20:54,997
Yes.
661
00:20:54,999 --> 00:20:58,101
I'm ready for my
self-evaluation.
662
00:20:58,102 --> 00:20:59,202
So I asked Peralta
663
00:20:59,203 --> 00:21:00,904
what you thought
my biggest flaw was,
664
00:21:00,905 --> 00:21:04,073
and he said, "who cares
what Holt thinks?"
665
00:21:04,108 --> 00:21:05,108
That's not surprising.
666
00:21:05,109 --> 00:21:06,743
He's very disrespectful.
667
00:21:06,744 --> 00:21:08,044
But he's not wrong.
668
00:21:08,045 --> 00:21:09,712
My biggest flaw
is that I care too much
669
00:21:09,713 --> 00:21:11,247
what you think of me.
670
00:21:11,248 --> 00:21:13,283
I should be more confident
in my own judgment,
671
00:21:13,284 --> 00:21:15,552
and I am so sure of that,
672
00:21:15,553 --> 00:21:17,120
I don't even care
if you think I'm right.
673
00:21:17,121 --> 00:21:19,155
Evaluation over.
674
00:21:19,156 --> 00:21:21,624
Enjoy your soup.
675
00:21:25,069 --> 00:21:27,829
Sync & corrections by Rafael UPD
www.addic7ed.com/