1
00:03:08,773 --> 00:03:12,776
NARRATOR: <i>Some people are born
into the wrong time and place.</i>

2
00:03:12,777 --> 00:03:16,112
<i>This was the American
frontier in 1882.</i>

3
00:03:16,113 --> 00:03:18,948
<i>A hard land for hard folk.</i>

4
00:03:18,949 --> 00:03:20,367
<i>Food was scarce,</i>

5
00:03:20,368 --> 00:03:21,993
<i>disease was rampant,</i>

6
00:03:21,994 --> 00:03:25,163
<i>and life was a daily
struggle for survival.</i>

7
00:03:25,164 --> 00:03:28,667
<i>Hell, this was Miss
America in 1880.</i>

8
00:03:28,668 --> 00:03:30,960
<i>Holy shit.</i>

9
00:03:30,961 --> 00:03:34,964
<i>To build a home and a life in
this harsh, unforgiving country</i>

10
00:03:34,965 --> 00:03:40,503
<i>required that a man be bold,
fearless, and tough as iron.</i>

11
00:03:40,680 --> 00:03:42,764
<i>The men who were
courageous and resilient</i>

12
00:03:42,765 --> 00:03:44,808
<i>were the men who prospered.</i>

13
00:03:44,809 --> 00:03:49,679
<i>But some men were just
big, giant pussies.</i>

14
00:03:53,859 --> 00:03:56,352
(PANTING)

15
00:03:57,071 --> 00:03:58,988
Well, well.

16
00:03:58,989 --> 00:04:01,408
Surprised you showed up, Stark.

17
00:04:01,409 --> 00:04:03,410
Yeah, well, you said you
would kill my family

18
00:04:03,411 --> 00:04:06,279
and burn my house down
if I didn't, so...

19
00:04:07,832 --> 00:04:09,332
Draw.

20
00:04:09,333 --> 00:04:10,750
(ALBERT STUTTERING)

21
00:04:10,751 --> 00:04:12,836
Is there anything at
all that I can say

22
00:04:12,837 --> 00:04:14,546
to get you to call this off?

23
00:04:14,547 --> 00:04:16,756
You yellow, Stark?

24
00:04:16,757 --> 00:04:20,719
Oh, okay, well, that's a little
racist to our hardworking friends

25
00:04:20,720 --> 00:04:23,755
over here from the Far
East, right, guys?

26
00:04:24,140 --> 00:04:25,890
Draw, you son of a bitch!

27
00:04:25,891 --> 00:04:28,852
Look, I just feel like if we
can talk this out, you know,

28
00:04:28,853 --> 00:04:31,396
we can find a calm,
rational solution

29
00:04:31,397 --> 00:04:34,190
and maybe we even laugh
about it one day.

30
00:04:34,191 --> 00:04:36,943
I ain't in the mood
to laugh, Stark!

31
00:04:36,944 --> 00:04:38,945
Look, there's always
humor in any...

32
00:04:38,946 --> 00:04:41,197
Oh, hey, look. This will make
you laugh. Look at our shadows.

33
00:04:41,198 --> 00:04:42,741
It looks like our shadows are
about to kiss each other.

34
00:04:42,742 --> 00:04:43,825
Look at that.

35
00:04:43,826 --> 00:04:46,578
Oh, wait, watch this. Oh,
my God, Charlie. Oh, my God.

36
00:04:46,579 --> 00:04:48,496
Thank you! This is
so generous of you.

37
00:04:48,497 --> 00:04:49,831
(CHUCKLING) Oh, wow! This is...

38
00:04:49,832 --> 00:04:51,458
- What a terrific guy you are.
- (SNICKERING)

39
00:04:51,459 --> 00:04:53,835
We barely know each other, but, hey,
when it's right, it's right, huh?

40
00:04:53,836 --> 00:04:56,588
I'll give you a little tap on the
hat when I'm good to go, okay?

41
00:04:56,589 --> 00:04:58,882
Look, we're laughing, right?
We're laughing now.

42
00:04:58,883 --> 00:05:00,216
What were we even fighting about?

43
00:05:00,217 --> 00:05:02,418
I can't remember. Can you?

44
00:05:02,428 --> 00:05:03,928
(CROWD GASPS)

45
00:05:03,929 --> 00:05:07,015
Your goddamn sheep grazed
up half my ranch, Stark.

46
00:05:07,016 --> 00:05:08,725
That grass ain't never
gonna grow back!

47
00:05:08,726 --> 00:05:10,393
All right, look. How about this?

48
00:05:10,394 --> 00:05:12,395
I'll pay you the money
you lost, okay?

49
00:05:12,396 --> 00:05:14,189
Just give me two days to sell off

50
00:05:14,190 --> 00:05:15,565
a few of my sheep and
I'll get you the money.

51
00:05:15,566 --> 00:05:16,816
All right. Just two days.

52
00:05:16,817 --> 00:05:20,528
If I don't have that cash,
I'm coming after ya.

53
00:05:20,529 --> 00:05:22,655
Okay, great. Thank you so
much for your patience.

54
00:05:22,656 --> 00:05:24,324
I really appreciate it.

55
00:05:24,325 --> 00:05:26,326
And what a relief for
all these people

56
00:05:26,327 --> 00:05:28,370
who came out here
hoping that we would

57
00:05:28,371 --> 00:05:30,205
find an amicable
solution to this, huh?

58
00:05:30,206 --> 00:05:32,374
Aw, somebody shoot some fucker!

59
00:05:32,375 --> 00:05:34,959
I took a half-day
off work for this!

60
00:05:34,960 --> 00:05:36,044
Okay, I just want to point out

61
00:05:36,045 --> 00:05:38,838
that guy's an English
teacher at our school.

62
00:05:38,839 --> 00:05:39,923
(GROANS)

63
00:05:39,924 --> 00:05:42,125
(ALL GASP)

64
00:05:42,259 --> 00:05:45,295
Just a little taste.

65
00:05:46,263 --> 00:05:48,965
(CROWD MURMURING)

66
00:05:57,733 --> 00:05:59,693
ALBERT: I mean, that should
have been the end of it, right?

67
00:05:59,694 --> 00:06:01,236
I mean, I tell him
I'll pay him off,

68
00:06:01,237 --> 00:06:02,737
we go our separate
ways, and that's it.

69
00:06:02,738 --> 00:06:04,906
But, no, he shoots me
in the fucking leg.

70
00:06:04,907 --> 00:06:08,985
I mean, it's just a graze,
but come on, look at that.

71
00:06:10,996 --> 00:06:12,914
(EXHALES DEEPLY)

72
00:06:12,915 --> 00:06:15,533
What?

73
00:06:15,876 --> 00:06:18,912
You should have fought him.

74
00:06:19,130 --> 00:06:21,339
I should have fought him?

75
00:06:21,340 --> 00:06:23,258
You're serious.

76
00:06:23,259 --> 00:06:25,969
Louise! My God! The guy is one
of the best shots around.

77
00:06:25,970 --> 00:06:28,763
- I look like I have Parkinson's next to him.
- What is that?

78
00:06:28,764 --> 00:06:32,559
It's just another way God
mysteriously shows that He loves us.

79
00:06:32,560 --> 00:06:34,561
But, look, it would have been
suicide to fight that guy.

80
00:06:34,562 --> 00:06:37,222
Albert, I'm breaking up with you.

81
00:06:41,360 --> 00:06:43,528
What?

82
00:06:43,529 --> 00:06:46,856
Yeah. I'm sorry.

83
00:06:51,370 --> 00:06:53,496
I got shot today.

84
00:06:53,497 --> 00:06:55,540
I know.

85
00:06:55,541 --> 00:06:56,958
Wait, wait, wait. Hang on a sec.

86
00:06:56,959 --> 00:06:58,626
Louise, where is this coming from?

87
00:06:58,627 --> 00:07:00,128
Is this because of the gunfight?

88
00:07:00,129 --> 00:07:03,006
No, I've actually been feeling
this way for a while.

89
00:07:03,007 --> 00:07:04,841
You're a great guy. I just...

90
00:07:04,842 --> 00:07:06,384
I realized that

91
00:07:06,385 --> 00:07:08,386
I want something else.

92
00:07:08,387 --> 00:07:11,097
Something else? Louise, it's
been a year and a half!

93
00:07:11,098 --> 00:07:13,058
Look, I know I'm just a sheep
farmer, but I'm saving money...

94
00:07:13,059 --> 00:07:15,060
Yeah, but you're not even a
good sheep farmer, Albert.

95
00:07:15,061 --> 00:07:16,436
Your sheep are everywhere.

96
00:07:16,437 --> 00:07:18,188
The one thing a sheep
farmer has to do

97
00:07:18,189 --> 00:07:20,106
is keep all of his sheep
in one place, all right.

98
00:07:20,107 --> 00:07:21,858
I went to your farm the other day,

99
00:07:21,859 --> 00:07:23,360
and I saw one in the backyard,

100
00:07:23,361 --> 00:07:24,444
three way up on the ridge,

101
00:07:24,445 --> 00:07:25,820
two in the pond, and
one on the roof.

102
00:07:25,821 --> 00:07:27,072
Okay, that's Bridget, all right?

103
00:07:27,073 --> 00:07:29,240
She has a problem with retardation,
but she's full of love.

104
00:07:29,241 --> 00:07:30,617
Look, we're getting off
track here, all right?

105
00:07:30,618 --> 00:07:33,161
Why don't you just tell
me what the problem is

106
00:07:33,162 --> 00:07:34,371
and then maybe I can fix it?

107
00:07:34,372 --> 00:07:35,830
Maybe if I were older,

108
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the timing would be right.

109
00:07:37,750 --> 00:07:39,876
But people are living
to be 35 these days

110
00:07:39,877 --> 00:07:42,087
and a girl doesn't
have to just go off

111
00:07:42,088 --> 00:07:44,214
and get married right away.

112
00:07:44,215 --> 00:07:46,216
I just, I have to...

113
00:07:46,217 --> 00:07:48,259
I have to work on myself.

114
00:07:48,260 --> 00:07:49,344
Oh, my God.

115
00:07:49,345 --> 00:07:50,804
- You did not just say that.
- What?

116
00:07:50,805 --> 00:07:52,013
"I have to work on myself."

117
00:07:52,014 --> 00:07:53,139
Louise, that's the
oldest line in the book.

118
00:07:53,140 --> 00:07:54,224
You realize that.

119
00:07:54,225 --> 00:07:55,558
You know what, it's okay, though.

120
00:07:55,559 --> 00:07:56,893
It's all right. I know
why you're saying it.

121
00:07:56,894 --> 00:07:59,270
It's because you don't want to
tell me that I'm the problem.

122
00:07:59,271 --> 00:08:01,314
(SIGHS)

123
00:08:01,315 --> 00:08:04,142
Goodbye, Albert.

124
00:08:08,656 --> 00:08:12,025
Goodbye? Wait. Louise. Louise!

125
00:08:12,952 --> 00:08:14,661
I love you.

126
00:08:14,662 --> 00:08:17,655
I'm sorry.

127
00:08:30,094 --> 00:08:31,177
(MOANING)

128
00:08:31,178 --> 00:08:34,097
COWBOY: Yeah! Oh, come on, come on!

129
00:08:34,098 --> 00:08:36,266
RUTH: Yeah, yeah, yeah!

130
00:08:36,267 --> 00:08:37,892
COWBOY:
You like me fucking you, don't you?

131
00:08:37,893 --> 00:08:40,228
RUTH: I do. It's really terrific.

132
00:08:40,229 --> 00:08:43,273
- COWBOY: Yeah! Oh! Ah! Yeah!
- RUTH: Oh...

133
00:08:43,274 --> 00:08:46,142
(MOANING CONTINUES)

134
00:08:48,404 --> 00:08:49,612
Ah...

135
00:08:49,613 --> 00:08:50,739
Hi, Edward.

136
00:08:50,740 --> 00:08:51,823
Hi, Millie.

137
00:08:51,824 --> 00:08:53,283
You waiting for Ruth?

138
00:08:53,284 --> 00:08:56,619
Yeah, I got off work early, so I
thought I'd take her out for a picnic.

139
00:08:56,620 --> 00:08:58,121
(RUTH SCREAMS)

140
00:08:58,122 --> 00:08:59,456
It sounds like she's just
about done up there.

141
00:08:59,457 --> 00:09:02,792
RUTH: Shoot that dirty
cowboy cum all over my face!

142
00:09:02,793 --> 00:09:03,918
Do I look okay?

143
00:09:03,919 --> 00:09:05,295
Yeah, you look good.

144
00:09:05,296 --> 00:09:06,588
- You look good.
- Oh, good.

145
00:09:06,589 --> 00:09:08,715
Say, Edward, do you mind
if I ask you something?

146
00:09:08,716 --> 00:09:09,799
Uh, yeah, sure.

147
00:09:09,800 --> 00:09:13,845
You're okay with your girlfriend
screwing 15 different guys every day

148
00:09:13,846 --> 00:09:15,597
and getting paid to do it?

149
00:09:15,598 --> 00:09:17,807
Well, my job sucks, too.

150
00:09:17,808 --> 00:09:21,061
I know. But, I mean,
you repair shoes.

151
00:09:21,062 --> 00:09:22,479
(GASPS) Eddie!

152
00:09:22,480 --> 00:09:23,688
Oh, hi, sweetie.

153
00:09:23,689 --> 00:09:25,732
What are you doing here?

154
00:09:25,733 --> 00:09:27,233
EDWARD: Well, I got off work early

155
00:09:27,234 --> 00:09:29,694
and I thought we could go
for a walk by the stream.

156
00:09:29,695 --> 00:09:31,321
- (EXHALES) Oh.
- Oh...

157
00:09:31,322 --> 00:09:33,031
Oh, your breath is, uh...

158
00:09:33,032 --> 00:09:34,407
Ooh! Ooh.

159
00:09:34,408 --> 00:09:36,534
- I had to give a blowjob. Sorry.
- Oh, that's okay.

160
00:09:36,535 --> 00:09:37,619
It's okay. Here, I got
you some flowers.

161
00:09:37,620 --> 00:09:38,703
(GASPS)

162
00:09:38,704 --> 00:09:40,663
- They're beautiful!
- Yeah, come on.

163
00:09:40,664 --> 00:09:43,291
Don't I have the best
boyfriend, Millie?

164
00:09:43,292 --> 00:09:45,585
Honestly, I have no fucking idea.

165
00:09:45,586 --> 00:09:46,670
Bye!

166
00:09:46,671 --> 00:09:49,673
Oh, hey, Ruthie, Clyde Hodgkins
wanted to come by a little later on.

167
00:09:49,674 --> 00:09:51,007
What did he want?

168
00:09:51,008 --> 00:09:52,592
I think he wants anal.

169
00:09:52,593 --> 00:09:55,387
Oh, honey, we can afford to get
you that new belt for church!

170
00:09:55,388 --> 00:09:56,513
Oh, that would be great!

171
00:09:56,514 --> 00:09:57,597
I know!

172
00:09:57,598 --> 00:09:59,391
So, like, 5:30? Does that work?

173
00:09:59,392 --> 00:10:01,351
Ah, that should work. Yeah.

174
00:10:01,352 --> 00:10:03,812
Well, what time is his appointment?

175
00:10:03,813 --> 00:10:07,065
Uh, it's really not like a
dentist's office here, Edward.

176
00:10:07,066 --> 00:10:08,733
You know, he'll just come by

177
00:10:08,734 --> 00:10:11,861
when he feels like putting
his penis inside an asshole.

178
00:10:11,862 --> 00:10:13,863
Yeah, so we'll just say 5:30.

179
00:10:13,864 --> 00:10:16,274
- (BOTH CHUCKLING)
- Okay.

180
00:10:18,744 --> 00:10:21,654
(BLEATING)

181
00:10:29,588 --> 00:10:31,715
ALBERT: Oh, shit.

182
00:10:31,716 --> 00:10:33,883
(BLEATING)

183
00:10:33,884 --> 00:10:36,294
(HORSE HUFFS)

184
00:10:44,854 --> 00:10:47,022
You're late.

185
00:10:47,023 --> 00:10:49,107
For what?

186
00:10:49,108 --> 00:10:51,601
Fair enough.

187
00:11:08,294 --> 00:11:10,787
EDWARD: Albert.

188
00:11:11,422 --> 00:11:12,547
Hey, guys.

189
00:11:12,548 --> 00:11:14,174
We heard about Louise.

190
00:11:14,175 --> 00:11:15,925
That's horrible.

191
00:11:15,926 --> 00:11:17,594
We're so sorry, Albert.

192
00:11:17,595 --> 00:11:20,129
Do you want to sit down?

193
00:11:20,306 --> 00:11:24,142
I'm good. I'm gonna
rest my asshole.

194
00:11:24,143 --> 00:11:27,604
I was just looking at these old
pictures of me and Louise.

195
00:11:27,605 --> 00:11:29,356
This is from the carnival.

196
00:11:29,357 --> 00:11:31,232
EDWARD: Oh, yeah.

197
00:11:31,233 --> 00:11:33,568
ALBERT: There's the town picnic.

198
00:11:33,569 --> 00:11:34,652
RUTH: Oh.

199
00:11:34,653 --> 00:11:36,988
ALBERT: This is the square dance.

200
00:11:36,989 --> 00:11:40,241
I almost wish you could
smile in photographs.

201
00:11:40,242 --> 00:11:42,619
Louise has such an amazing smile.

202
00:11:42,620 --> 00:11:44,788
- That'd be weird.
- Huh?

203
00:11:44,789 --> 00:11:46,790
Have you ever smiled
in a photograph?

204
00:11:46,791 --> 00:11:48,458
- No, have you?
- Oh, God, no.

205
00:11:48,459 --> 00:11:50,126
No, you'd look like
an insane person.

206
00:11:50,127 --> 00:11:52,295
But, it's just, you know,
I've been sitting here

207
00:11:52,296 --> 00:11:54,506
trying to figure out how the hell

208
00:11:54,507 --> 00:11:56,508
I could have screwed this up.

209
00:11:56,509 --> 00:11:58,468
I did everything for her.

210
00:11:58,469 --> 00:12:00,387
If she was happy, I was happy.

211
00:12:00,388 --> 00:12:02,514
That's all I cared about.

212
00:12:02,515 --> 00:12:07,644
(SIGHS) And she was the one
thing that made the shootings,

213
00:12:07,645 --> 00:12:10,647
and the diseases, and the wild
animals, and the Indians,

214
00:12:10,648 --> 00:12:15,101
and the general depressing
awfulness about the West

215
00:12:15,403 --> 00:12:17,854
bearable. (SIGHS)

216
00:12:18,739 --> 00:12:21,658
God, I love her so much.

217
00:12:21,659 --> 00:12:24,327
You're gonna make me cry.

218
00:12:24,328 --> 00:12:27,080
- Let's get fucked up.
- Yeah.

219
00:12:27,081 --> 00:12:29,657
(COUNTRY MUSIC PLAYING)

220
00:12:30,418 --> 00:12:32,994
(INDISTINCT CHATTER)

221
00:12:36,173 --> 00:12:37,716
So, what are you gonna do?

222
00:12:37,717 --> 00:12:38,842
Uh...

223
00:12:38,843 --> 00:12:40,468
I don't know what I'm gonna do.

224
00:12:40,469 --> 00:12:41,678
Commit suicide, maybe.

225
00:12:41,679 --> 00:12:44,139
Albert, I know everything
seems hopeless right now,

226
00:12:44,140 --> 00:12:47,767
but I promise you, there's
so much to live for.

227
00:12:47,768 --> 00:12:49,185
Really? Is there?

228
00:12:49,186 --> 00:12:52,522
What is there to live for on
the frontier in 1882? Huh?

229
00:12:52,523 --> 00:12:54,024
Look, let me tell you something.

230
00:12:54,025 --> 00:12:56,609
We live in a terrible
place and time.

231
00:12:56,610 --> 00:13:00,321
The American West is a disgusting,
awful, dirty, dangerous place.

232
00:13:00,322 --> 00:13:01,364
Look around you.

233
00:13:01,365 --> 00:13:04,034
Everything out here that's
not you wants to kill you.

234
00:13:04,035 --> 00:13:07,537
Outlaws, angry drunk people,
scorned hookers, hungry animals,

235
00:13:07,538 --> 00:13:11,041
diseases, major and minor
injuries, Indians, the weather.

236
00:13:11,042 --> 00:13:12,834
You can get killed just
going to the bathroom.

237
00:13:12,835 --> 00:13:15,879
I take my life in my hands every
time I walk out to my outhouse.

238
00:13:15,880 --> 00:13:17,881
There's fucking rattlesnakes
all in the grass out there.

239
00:13:17,882 --> 00:13:20,300
And even if I make it, you
know what can kill me?

240
00:13:20,301 --> 00:13:22,135
Cholera. You know cholera?

241
00:13:22,136 --> 00:13:24,220
- The Black Shit.
- The Black Shit.

242
00:13:24,221 --> 00:13:27,098
The latest offering in the frontier's
disease-of-the-month club.

243
00:13:27,099 --> 00:13:29,809
And even if you survive
all those things,

244
00:13:29,810 --> 00:13:31,019
you know what else can kill you?

245
00:13:31,020 --> 00:13:33,730
The fucking doctor.
The doctor can kill you.

246
00:13:33,731 --> 00:13:35,357
I had a cold a couple of
years ago. I went in there.

247
00:13:35,358 --> 00:13:36,566
You know what he
said to me? He goes,

248
00:13:36,567 --> 00:13:37,734
"Oh, you need an ear nail."

249
00:13:37,735 --> 00:13:39,361
A nail in my fucking ear.

250
00:13:39,362 --> 00:13:40,528
That is modern medicine for you.

251
00:13:40,529 --> 00:13:41,905
"Yeah, Doc, I have a fever of 102."

252
00:13:41,906 --> 00:13:43,573
"Oh, you need a donkey kickin'."

253
00:13:43,574 --> 00:13:46,826
You know our pastor has
shot two people? Our pastor.

254
00:13:46,827 --> 00:13:47,911
- No, no.
- No.

255
00:13:47,912 --> 00:13:49,371
Honest to God. Shot a guy in a duel

256
00:13:49,372 --> 00:13:52,082
and then went back and
killed the guy's teenage son

257
00:13:52,083 --> 00:13:54,042
because he was afraid he would
kill him out of revenge.

258
00:13:54,043 --> 00:13:55,585
Wait, how do you know that?

259
00:13:55,586 --> 00:13:58,254
Because he did a whole
fucking sermon about it!

260
00:13:58,255 --> 00:14:00,715
A lesson about seeing
things through.

261
00:14:00,716 --> 00:14:02,258
By the way, look at this.
See those guys over there?

262
00:14:02,259 --> 00:14:04,427
The guys who work in the silver
mines? See what they're eating?

263
00:14:04,428 --> 00:14:05,762
Ribs doused in hot sauce.

264
00:14:05,763 --> 00:14:08,223
They eat hot spicy foods
every meal of the day.

265
00:14:08,224 --> 00:14:09,349
Do you know why?

266
00:14:09,350 --> 00:14:11,434
Because their palates are so
completely fucking dulled

267
00:14:11,435 --> 00:14:14,187
from inhaling poisoned gas, 12
hours a day, down in the mines.

268
00:14:14,188 --> 00:14:15,563
That's all they can taste.

269
00:14:15,564 --> 00:14:17,190
You know what that kind of
diet does to your guts?

270
00:14:17,191 --> 00:14:19,943
Constipation, cramps,
dyspepsia, liver disease,

271
00:14:19,944 --> 00:14:22,612
kidney disease, hemorrhoids,
bowel inflammation.

272
00:14:22,613 --> 00:14:25,899
They literally die
from their own farts.

273
00:14:25,908 --> 00:14:28,443
(FARTS)

274
00:14:29,578 --> 00:14:31,538
And, oh, oh, you want
to see more death?

275
00:14:31,539 --> 00:14:35,375
All we got to do is get up
and walk out the front door.

276
00:14:35,376 --> 00:14:36,835
That is our mayor.

277
00:14:36,836 --> 00:14:37,919
He is dead.

278
00:14:37,920 --> 00:14:40,130
He has been lying there,
dead, for three days.

279
00:14:40,131 --> 00:14:41,631
No one has done a thing.

280
00:14:41,632 --> 00:14:44,592
Not moved him, not
looked into his death,

281
00:14:44,593 --> 00:14:46,803
not even replaced him with
a temporary appointee.

282
00:14:46,804 --> 00:14:50,640
For the last three days, the
highest-ranking official in our town

283
00:14:50,641 --> 00:14:52,225
has been a dead guy.

284
00:14:52,226 --> 00:14:54,644
Oh! Look at that! Look at that!

285
00:14:54,645 --> 00:14:58,565
Wolves are dragging the body
away as if to illustrate my point!

286
00:14:58,566 --> 00:15:00,316
Bye! Bye, Mr. Mayor!

287
00:15:00,317 --> 00:15:02,652
Bye! Have fun becoming wolf shit!
Bye!

288
00:15:02,653 --> 00:15:03,987
God!

289
00:15:03,988 --> 00:15:06,406
That, my friends, is
the American West.

290
00:15:06,407 --> 00:15:10,660
A disgusting, awful, dirty cesspool
of despair, and fuck all of it.

291
00:15:10,661 --> 00:15:11,828
Why don't you shut up?

292
00:15:11,829 --> 00:15:14,030
You shut up!

293
00:15:18,377 --> 00:15:19,502
Mmm, mmm...

294
00:15:19,503 --> 00:15:22,464
Ow! Ruth. Jesus Christ.

295
00:15:22,465 --> 00:15:24,591
- Stop it.
- Okay, fine.

296
00:15:24,592 --> 00:15:27,844
At least have Dr. Harper
take a look at it tomorrow.

297
00:15:27,845 --> 00:15:29,095
(LAUGHING SARCASTICALLY)

298
00:15:29,096 --> 00:15:31,681
If you could hear
yourself right now.

299
00:15:31,682 --> 00:15:33,516
You know what's gonna happen
if I go to Dr. Harper

300
00:15:33,517 --> 00:15:36,603
and I say, "Take a look at that"?

301
00:15:36,604 --> 00:15:39,272
He's gonna say,
"Oh, that looks like it hurts.

302
00:15:39,273 --> 00:15:41,858
"Let me give you a blue jay
to peck out the blood."

303
00:15:41,859 --> 00:15:43,610
Maybe you should...

304
00:15:43,611 --> 00:15:47,146
I don't know, maybe you
should try to talk to Louise.

305
00:15:48,866 --> 00:15:50,700
- That's a great idea.
- Yeah?

306
00:15:50,701 --> 00:15:53,370
- That's the jackpot. That's the jackpot!
- Huh?

307
00:15:53,371 --> 00:15:55,372
- I still got it!
- Okay.

308
00:15:55,373 --> 00:15:57,540
I have good ideas sometimes.

309
00:15:57,541 --> 00:15:59,876
I didn't mean now!

310
00:15:59,877 --> 00:16:04,038
Hey, hey, dude, you really
shouldn't drink and horse.

311
00:16:05,216 --> 00:16:08,376
(GRUNTING)

312
00:16:12,390 --> 00:16:17,268
No. No. No. No. No. No.

313
00:16:17,269 --> 00:16:19,721
(GRUNTING)

314
00:16:24,694 --> 00:16:27,153
Yeah, there you... Okay.

315
00:16:27,154 --> 00:16:29,647
(SNORING)

316
00:16:55,891 --> 00:16:59,102
Okay, Curtis. Curtis, buddy,

317
00:16:59,103 --> 00:17:02,605
I'm gonna be right back.
I'll be right back, okay?

318
00:17:02,606 --> 00:17:04,607
Or not! (LAUGHS)

319
00:17:04,608 --> 00:17:08,144
No, that's being too ambitious.

320
00:17:15,578 --> 00:17:17,203
Hey. Hey.

321
00:17:17,204 --> 00:17:19,122
Albert, what the
hell are you doing?

322
00:17:19,123 --> 00:17:20,415
Louise, we need to talk.

323
00:17:20,416 --> 00:17:22,459
- It's 1:30 in the morning.
- We need to talk.

324
00:17:22,460 --> 00:17:24,586
- And we need to talk tonight.
- What happened to your face?

325
00:17:24,587 --> 00:17:28,965
I got in a fight with an animal
that I could not identify.

326
00:17:28,966 --> 00:17:30,050
Okay, you're drunk.

327
00:17:30,051 --> 00:17:32,469
I'm a smucks-dinnin' drunk.

328
00:17:32,470 --> 00:17:34,804
I don't know what you want
from me, but it's late.

329
00:17:34,805 --> 00:17:35,930
- I gotta go.
- Louise! Louise!

330
00:17:35,931 --> 00:17:38,308
Louise, please, listen to me.
I love you, okay?

331
00:17:38,309 --> 00:17:39,809
I love you.

332
00:17:39,810 --> 00:17:42,145
And I just think if
we talked this out

333
00:17:42,146 --> 00:17:44,105
that we can get
somewhere and fix it.

334
00:17:44,106 --> 00:17:46,316
Look, Albert, you gotta go.

335
00:17:46,317 --> 00:17:49,861
I'm sure you're right for
somebody else, just not for me.

336
00:17:49,862 --> 00:17:51,488
Okay?

337
00:17:51,489 --> 00:17:52,655
Good night.

338
00:17:52,656 --> 00:17:55,275
Wait, let me just touch you.

339
00:18:03,417 --> 00:18:06,744
You're being a fucking jerk!

340
00:18:07,838 --> 00:18:11,124
Okay, I'll talk to you tomorrow.

341
00:18:11,467 --> 00:18:14,135
You know what?
I heard you fart once.

342
00:18:14,136 --> 00:18:16,346
And it went...
(IMITATING FART NOISE)

343
00:18:16,347 --> 00:18:19,683
And it was a sharp one.

344
00:18:19,684 --> 00:18:21,935
A little sharpie poop-toot.

345
00:18:21,936 --> 00:18:23,561
And I heard...

346
00:18:23,562 --> 00:18:25,805
(HORSE NEIGHS)

347
00:18:30,986 --> 00:18:33,613
MAN: You know what I'm gonna
get with this gold, Plugger?

348
00:18:33,614 --> 00:18:34,864
You know what I'm gonna get you?

349
00:18:34,865 --> 00:18:38,827
I'm gonna get you a big old
stack of fresh-cut steaks.

350
00:18:38,828 --> 00:18:40,161
(CHUCKLING) I bet you'd like that.

351
00:18:40,162 --> 00:18:41,413
(BARKING)

352
00:18:41,414 --> 00:18:42,872
What? What's the matter with...

353
00:18:42,873 --> 00:18:44,082
Settle down, boy.

354
00:18:44,083 --> 00:18:45,208
(BARKING CONTINUES)

355
00:18:45,209 --> 00:18:47,711
Come on, boy, hey!
Quiet down, Plugger!

356
00:18:47,712 --> 00:18:50,914
Whoa, mule!

357
00:18:58,848 --> 00:19:01,132
(HORSES NEIGHING)

358
00:19:02,018 --> 00:19:03,101
Howdy, folks.

359
00:19:03,102 --> 00:19:04,185
Howdy.

360
00:19:04,186 --> 00:19:06,229
What can I do for you fellas?

361
00:19:06,230 --> 00:19:08,440
Well, we're riding through
to Sherman Creek.

362
00:19:08,441 --> 00:19:11,526
Be obliged if you could
tell us the shortest route.

363
00:19:11,527 --> 00:19:14,863
Oh, yeah, I can help you with that.
(GRUNTS)

364
00:19:14,864 --> 00:19:17,073
I got a map right here.

365
00:19:17,074 --> 00:19:18,241
Yes, sir.

366
00:19:18,242 --> 00:19:20,076
Oh.

367
00:19:20,077 --> 00:19:22,954
You're on the main road now.

368
00:19:22,955 --> 00:19:26,166
And the main road goes
right through Bullhead

369
00:19:26,167 --> 00:19:28,793
and straight through
to Sherman Creek.

370
00:19:28,794 --> 00:19:31,212
But if you want the quickest way,

371
00:19:31,213 --> 00:19:33,423
I'd take Bilbee Pass.

372
00:19:33,424 --> 00:19:37,469
Safer, too. Less chance
of bandits and such.

373
00:19:37,470 --> 00:19:38,720
Thank you.

374
00:19:38,721 --> 00:19:41,297
- You can keep that.
- Oh.

375
00:19:42,725 --> 00:19:45,477
Uh, one more thing
you might do for us.

376
00:19:45,478 --> 00:19:46,603
What's that?

377
00:19:46,604 --> 00:19:49,806
You could show us the gold.

378
00:19:50,149 --> 00:19:52,108
Gold? (CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY)

379
00:19:52,109 --> 00:19:54,486
I ain't got no gold.

380
00:19:54,487 --> 00:19:56,237
I wish.

381
00:19:56,238 --> 00:20:00,992
Been prospecting up there, but
that stream's about panned out.

382
00:20:00,993 --> 00:20:03,661
Old Plugger and I done give it up.

383
00:20:03,662 --> 00:20:06,039
We're going on back into town.

384
00:20:06,040 --> 00:20:10,043
(CHUCKLES) Aye. You see,
that's... That's just it.

385
00:20:10,044 --> 00:20:12,921
You're heading back to town
in the middle of the day.

386
00:20:12,922 --> 00:20:17,333
A prospector only does that
when he's found gold to sell.

387
00:20:17,510 --> 00:20:18,843
Show it to me.

388
00:20:18,844 --> 00:20:21,054
No, I swear to you, mister.

389
00:20:21,055 --> 00:20:23,306
I ain't got no gold.

390
00:20:23,307 --> 00:20:27,310
We're just going into
town to get some...

391
00:20:27,311 --> 00:20:29,479
Whoa, whoa, whoa...

392
00:20:29,480 --> 00:20:33,400
- Hold on, let me think here a minute.
- You do that.

393
00:20:33,401 --> 00:20:37,395
I might just have a
little bit of gold.

394
00:20:38,239 --> 00:20:40,990
Yeah, here it is.
I forgot all about it.

395
00:20:40,991 --> 00:20:43,243
Here, take it.

396
00:20:43,244 --> 00:20:45,737
Pick up your gun.

397
00:20:45,830 --> 00:20:46,913
What?

398
00:20:46,914 --> 00:20:50,500
Well, I'm not just gonna take
your gold. That'd be stealing.

399
00:20:50,501 --> 00:20:53,503
You know what, old timer?
We'll shoot for it.

400
00:20:53,504 --> 00:20:55,046
- Clinch.
- Shut up.

401
00:20:55,047 --> 00:20:57,424
(CLEARS THROAT)
You just take the gold, okay?

402
00:20:57,425 --> 00:20:59,843
Only a thief would do that.

403
00:20:59,844 --> 00:21:01,886
Are you calling me a
thief, old timer?

404
00:21:01,887 --> 00:21:03,263
No, no, no!

405
00:21:03,264 --> 00:21:06,758
Then pick up your gun.

406
00:21:12,023 --> 00:21:13,690
That's it.

407
00:21:13,691 --> 00:21:16,226
Now point it at me.

408
00:21:24,035 --> 00:21:26,828
We shoot on three.

409
00:21:26,829 --> 00:21:29,122
(GUN CLICKS)

410
00:21:29,123 --> 00:21:31,407
One.

411
00:21:32,001 --> 00:21:34,244
Two.

412
00:21:36,213 --> 00:21:38,173
God damn it, Clinch!

413
00:21:38,174 --> 00:21:39,549
You didn't have to shoot him!

414
00:21:39,550 --> 00:21:41,092
I know I didn't have
to, sweetheart.

415
00:21:41,093 --> 00:21:43,636
He would've given you the gold!

416
00:21:43,637 --> 00:21:46,973
The point is I had
to ask him twice.

417
00:21:46,974 --> 00:21:48,641
I'm a busy man with a schedule.

418
00:21:48,642 --> 00:21:50,435
You're a son of a bitch
is what you are.

419
00:21:50,436 --> 00:21:51,770
(GASPS)

420
00:21:51,771 --> 00:21:55,106
Don't you ever say that
to me in front of my men.

421
00:21:55,107 --> 00:21:57,275
A man's wife will respect him.

422
00:21:57,276 --> 00:22:00,979
Now, let's try that again.

423
00:22:01,322 --> 00:22:02,572
Oh, my God, I love you.

424
00:22:02,573 --> 00:22:05,575
I'm, like, the luckiest girl
ever in the history of girls.

425
00:22:05,576 --> 00:22:10,113
That's it. Now, mount up.

426
00:22:11,415 --> 00:22:13,950
Hey, Clinch.

427
00:22:14,085 --> 00:22:15,752
Take a look.

428
00:22:15,753 --> 00:22:18,254
You'd lose half a day
going through Bullhead.

429
00:22:18,255 --> 00:22:21,257
CLINCH: You, Enoch and
Jordy will ride with me.

430
00:22:21,258 --> 00:22:24,427
We'll take Bilbee Pass
to Sherman Creek Trail.

431
00:22:24,428 --> 00:22:26,596
And make no mistake about the
kind of heat we're going to draw

432
00:22:26,597 --> 00:22:28,431
after we take that stage.

433
00:22:28,432 --> 00:22:31,184
Anna, I'm gonna keep
you out of harm's way.

434
00:22:31,185 --> 00:22:33,603
Lewis, you take Anna and ride east

435
00:22:33,604 --> 00:22:36,356
and hole up here in, uh, Old Stump.

436
00:22:36,357 --> 00:22:37,440
You got that?

437
00:22:37,441 --> 00:22:39,192
We'll let things cool

438
00:22:39,193 --> 00:22:42,979
for a wee bit and then we'll
come for you in 12 days.

439
00:22:44,448 --> 00:22:46,816
(URGES HORSE)

440
00:22:47,284 --> 00:22:49,485
(HORSE NEIGHS)

441
00:22:50,579 --> 00:22:52,956
(WHIMPERING)

442
00:22:52,957 --> 00:22:55,241
Come on, boy.

443
00:22:55,710 --> 00:22:58,378
Come on, Plugger. Come on! Yeah!

444
00:22:58,379 --> 00:23:00,130
Good boy! Let's go!

445
00:23:00,131 --> 00:23:02,999
LEWIS: Oh, Jesus Christ!

446
00:23:06,554 --> 00:23:09,589
(BLEATING)

447
00:23:13,352 --> 00:23:16,521
Well, look who's up at
2:00 in the afternoon.

448
00:23:16,522 --> 00:23:17,981
(LAUGHS SARCASTICALLY)

449
00:23:17,982 --> 00:23:22,352
There's still some pig ass and
sweet cream there if you want it.

450
00:23:22,403 --> 00:23:24,529
(FLY BUZZING)

451
00:23:24,530 --> 00:23:26,740
I'm gonna use the outhouse. Um...

452
00:23:26,741 --> 00:23:29,993
If I die out there, will you
guys just do me one favor?

453
00:23:29,994 --> 00:23:32,912
Just once, I want you
to switch seats.

454
00:23:32,913 --> 00:23:34,080
Fuck off.

455
00:23:34,081 --> 00:23:36,333
Okay.

456
00:23:36,334 --> 00:23:37,542
Oh.

457
00:23:37,543 --> 00:23:40,086
Ah, Edward, hey. What's going on?

458
00:23:40,087 --> 00:23:43,214
Oh, my God. Albert,
you look terrible!

459
00:23:43,215 --> 00:23:45,592
Oh, wow, there's that
confidence boost I need.

460
00:23:45,593 --> 00:23:47,344
Thanks a lot. How you doing, buddy?

461
00:23:47,345 --> 00:23:49,262
Well, honestly, I'm a
little worried about you.

462
00:23:49,263 --> 00:23:51,181
I haven't seen you in
town in a week and a half

463
00:23:51,182 --> 00:23:54,517
and, you know, it seems like you're
just staying in and sleeping all day.

464
00:23:54,518 --> 00:23:58,104
(STAMMERING) No, I don't
stay home all day. I go out.

465
00:23:58,105 --> 00:23:59,356
You know what I did on Tuesday?

466
00:23:59,357 --> 00:24:01,191
I went out to Charlie
Blanche's ranch

467
00:24:01,192 --> 00:24:02,359
and I paid him the money I owe him

468
00:24:02,360 --> 00:24:04,110
so he won't shoot me
in the fucking face.

469
00:24:04,111 --> 00:24:05,445
I did that. That's going out.

470
00:24:05,446 --> 00:24:07,238
Well, that's not really what
I'm talking about. (CHUCKLES)

471
00:24:07,239 --> 00:24:08,907
Okay, look. Here's the
truth, all right?

472
00:24:08,908 --> 00:24:11,117
I just feel like I need to
stay here with my parents.

473
00:24:11,118 --> 00:24:13,161
They're not gonna be
around much longer

474
00:24:13,162 --> 00:24:16,539
and I just want to be able to give
back all the love and affection

475
00:24:16,540 --> 00:24:18,375
that I got growing up.

476
00:24:18,376 --> 00:24:19,626
You know? Right, guys?

477
00:24:19,627 --> 00:24:20,877
(FARTS) Ow!

478
00:24:20,878 --> 00:24:22,754
Oh, you getting the fart
needles again, Dad?

479
00:24:22,755 --> 00:24:24,506
Never mind what I'm getting!

480
00:24:24,507 --> 00:24:27,884
(LAUGHING SARCASTICALLY)
I love him so much!

481
00:24:27,885 --> 00:24:31,137
Albert, I know you're taking this
breakup really hard, and I understand,

482
00:24:31,138 --> 00:24:32,722
but you got to get
out of this funk.

483
00:24:32,723 --> 00:24:35,767
I mean, you haven't shorn
your sheep in weeks.

484
00:24:35,768 --> 00:24:38,261
(BLEATING)

485
00:24:39,063 --> 00:24:40,772
Look, you don't know what
this is like, all right.

486
00:24:40,773 --> 00:24:43,316
With all due respect, you have no
fucking clue what this is like.

487
00:24:43,317 --> 00:24:45,026
All right? You're going
home every night

488
00:24:45,027 --> 00:24:46,653
to your girlfriend who loves you.

489
00:24:46,654 --> 00:24:48,947
- You're having sex with her, and you...
- Ah...

490
00:24:48,948 --> 00:24:53,743
No, Ruth and I have...
We've never done that.

491
00:24:53,744 --> 00:24:55,954
What do you mean you've...

492
00:24:55,955 --> 00:24:58,415
You've never had sex with Ruth?

493
00:24:58,416 --> 00:25:01,751
Yeah. No, no. Yeah.

494
00:25:01,752 --> 00:25:05,463
Wait, doesn't she have sex with, like,
10 guys every day at the whorehouse?

495
00:25:05,464 --> 00:25:07,757
On a slow day, yeah.

496
00:25:07,758 --> 00:25:09,259
But you guys have never had sex?

497
00:25:09,260 --> 00:25:12,929
No. No, Ruth wants to wait
until we get married.

498
00:25:12,930 --> 00:25:15,432
You know, she's a
Christian and so am I,

499
00:25:15,433 --> 00:25:19,394
and we want to save ourselves
for our wedding night.

500
00:25:19,395 --> 00:25:21,896
Edward, have you... Have you
ever had sex with anyone?

501
00:25:21,897 --> 00:25:23,815
Well, there was some shit with
my uncle, but that was...

502
00:25:23,816 --> 00:25:27,944
You know, it's really hard
to remember all that stuff.

503
00:25:27,945 --> 00:25:29,320
You know, yeah, you're right.

504
00:25:29,321 --> 00:25:30,405
Things could be a lot worse.

505
00:25:30,406 --> 00:25:31,489
Yeah.

506
00:25:31,490 --> 00:25:34,200
Um, I'll get out, I'll meet
some people. Yeah, thanks.

507
00:25:34,201 --> 00:25:35,577
- Okay.
- (GEORGE FARTS)

508
00:25:35,578 --> 00:25:39,614
Ow! That came out of my penis!

509
00:25:41,584 --> 00:25:44,169
EDWARD: Man, I see kids everywhere
with those stick hoops lately.

510
00:25:44,170 --> 00:25:46,254
I know. Me, too.

511
00:25:46,255 --> 00:25:47,839
It's got to be bad for
their brains, right?

512
00:25:47,840 --> 00:25:49,466
Yeah, it stunts their
attention span.

513
00:25:49,467 --> 00:25:50,717
I read an article in the paper.

514
00:25:50,718 --> 00:25:53,219
Yeah, I saw that. It's like
they lose the power to innovate

515
00:25:53,220 --> 00:25:54,888
because they're staring at
the stick hoop all day.

516
00:25:54,889 --> 00:25:56,097
Yep.

517
00:25:56,098 --> 00:25:58,558
Oh, by the way, they're delivering
the town's ice shipment today.

518
00:25:58,559 --> 00:25:59,726
You want to go watch?

519
00:25:59,727 --> 00:26:01,227
- Oh, yeah, that'd be fun.
- Yeah!

520
00:26:01,228 --> 00:26:03,396
Yeah. It's always a thrill
when you get to see

521
00:26:03,397 --> 00:26:05,148
that much ice all in one place.

522
00:26:05,149 --> 00:26:06,816
Yeah, I think so, too.
I'm really excited.

523
00:26:06,817 --> 00:26:09,561
Edward, Edward, look, look.

524
00:26:13,032 --> 00:26:15,400
Holy shit.

525
00:26:16,118 --> 00:26:17,160
Fucking Foy.

526
00:26:17,161 --> 00:26:19,120
She told me she didn't
want to see anybody.

527
00:26:19,121 --> 00:26:21,081
She told me she had
to work on herself.

528
00:26:21,082 --> 00:26:22,540
Look at that.

529
00:26:22,541 --> 00:26:24,376
Oh, my God. Fucking Foy!

530
00:26:24,377 --> 00:26:25,960
The owner of the Moustachery.

531
00:26:25,961 --> 00:26:27,796
Oh, look at that. He's kissing her.

532
00:26:27,797 --> 00:26:29,464
- EDWARD: He's frenching her.
- ALBERT: Fucking Foy!

533
00:26:29,465 --> 00:26:31,132
Maybe you should grow a moustache.

534
00:26:31,133 --> 00:26:32,717
No, I can't afford it.

535
00:26:32,718 --> 00:26:35,220
The creams, the waxes, the lotions.

536
00:26:35,221 --> 00:26:36,596
I don't have the money.

537
00:26:36,597 --> 00:26:37,681
Fucking Foy!

538
00:26:37,682 --> 00:26:39,599
Hey, Albert, maybe we
should just go to church.

539
00:26:39,600 --> 00:26:40,975
It'll make you feel a lot better.

540
00:26:40,976 --> 00:26:42,018
Church is not gonna...

541
00:26:42,019 --> 00:26:44,804
Oh, hey, look! It's the ice!

542
00:26:45,439 --> 00:26:46,523
(CHUCKLES)

543
00:26:46,524 --> 00:26:47,941
Why is it so big?

544
00:26:47,942 --> 00:26:49,526
So it doesn't melt.

545
00:26:49,527 --> 00:26:50,610
EDWARD: Oh.

546
00:26:50,611 --> 00:26:52,195
That's so neat.

547
00:26:52,196 --> 00:26:53,822
I know. It's actually really
interesting how they do it.

548
00:26:53,823 --> 00:26:56,324
It's this one company out in Boston

549
00:26:56,325 --> 00:26:58,993
that basically cuts
it in big blocks

550
00:26:58,994 --> 00:27:02,539
from frozen lakes and ponds,
and they just ship it all over the...

551
00:27:02,540 --> 00:27:03,790
BOTH: Oh! Oh...

552
00:27:03,791 --> 00:27:06,209
Oh, my God! Oh, my God!

553
00:27:06,210 --> 00:27:08,920
That went south so fast!

554
00:27:08,921 --> 00:27:12,165
Oh! Oh!

555
00:27:12,883 --> 00:27:15,802
WILSON:
And make no mistake, my children.

556
00:27:15,803 --> 00:27:20,974
There shall be swift and righteous
justice on all free grazers.

557
00:27:20,975 --> 00:27:23,727
No more shall they nibble wantonly

558
00:27:23,728 --> 00:27:25,603
at the teat of our coffers.

559
00:27:25,604 --> 00:27:28,440
And that's just exactly
like that part in the Bible

560
00:27:28,441 --> 00:27:30,692
that applies to that situation.

561
00:27:30,693 --> 00:27:34,112
I would also like to
offer a heartfelt prayer

562
00:27:34,113 --> 00:27:36,239
to the family of James Addison,

563
00:27:36,240 --> 00:27:38,158
who was killed this morning

564
00:27:38,159 --> 00:27:39,826
while unloading the ice shipment.

565
00:27:39,827 --> 00:27:43,038
James, we will think of
you lovingly this July

566
00:27:43,039 --> 00:27:45,582
as we sip the cold summer beverages

567
00:27:45,583 --> 00:27:47,292
for which you gave your life.

568
00:27:47,293 --> 00:27:49,627
(WHISPERING) They're still
gonna use the fucking ice.

569
00:27:49,628 --> 00:27:51,755
Now, before we end this
morning's service,

570
00:27:51,756 --> 00:27:55,633
I would like to welcome two
new members to our community.

571
00:27:55,634 --> 00:27:58,595
Lewis Barnes and his sister, Anna.

572
00:27:58,596 --> 00:28:00,472
They've just moved
here to Old Stump

573
00:28:00,473 --> 00:28:02,432
and they plan to build a farm.

574
00:28:02,433 --> 00:28:04,351
And we wish them all the luck.

575
00:28:04,352 --> 00:28:06,811
Well, that concludes
today's service.

576
00:28:06,812 --> 00:28:08,772
So, may God bless you
for another week

577
00:28:08,773 --> 00:28:11,441
and there is a mountain
lion warning in effect.

578
00:28:11,442 --> 00:28:14,018
(INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS)

579
00:28:26,290 --> 00:28:27,374
Hi.

580
00:28:27,375 --> 00:28:28,792
Hey, you.

581
00:28:28,793 --> 00:28:30,460
- So, the fair's coming up...
- Mmm?

582
00:28:30,461 --> 00:28:34,297
and I was thinking that we
could go dress shopping later.

583
00:28:34,298 --> 00:28:36,424
I was thinking you
need a new dress.

584
00:28:36,425 --> 00:28:38,301
(GASPS) Something expensive?

585
00:28:38,302 --> 00:28:39,969
Stupidly expensive!

586
00:28:39,970 --> 00:28:42,547
Okay. (CHUCKLES)

587
00:28:52,233 --> 00:28:53,566
Oh, Jesus. Wow.

588
00:28:53,567 --> 00:28:55,819
Hi, Albert.

589
00:28:55,820 --> 00:28:57,570
Hello.

590
00:28:57,571 --> 00:29:01,065
What's up, kiddo? Never
seen you in here before.

591
00:29:01,492 --> 00:29:03,201
Just browsing.

592
00:29:03,202 --> 00:29:04,869
Yeah.

593
00:29:04,870 --> 00:29:07,497
You don't have a moustache, though.

594
00:29:07,498 --> 00:29:10,500
No, I know. I was thinking
about growing one.

595
00:29:10,501 --> 00:29:11,584
I'm sorry, I can't...

596
00:29:11,585 --> 00:29:14,170
- I said I was thinking about growing one.
- Oh.

597
00:29:14,171 --> 00:29:17,507
Excuse me, I have to
use the powder room.

598
00:29:17,508 --> 00:29:21,886
And just what kind of moustache
are you looking to grow?

599
00:29:21,887 --> 00:29:24,514
Um, a big one.

600
00:29:24,515 --> 00:29:26,516
Like one of those
ones that goes down

601
00:29:26,517 --> 00:29:28,560
along the side of my mouth,

602
00:29:28,561 --> 00:29:31,980
and then goes up the
edge of my jaw,

603
00:29:31,981 --> 00:29:35,525
and then becomes my sideburns,

604
00:29:35,526 --> 00:29:38,486
and then becomes my hair.

605
00:29:38,487 --> 00:29:39,654
A MÃ¶bius moustache.

606
00:29:39,655 --> 00:29:42,490
MÃ¶bius moustache, that's the one.

607
00:29:42,491 --> 00:29:44,701
Yeah. Um...

608
00:29:44,702 --> 00:29:46,619
You should know that
kind of moustache

609
00:29:46,620 --> 00:29:49,831
is a very costly facial accessory.

610
00:29:49,832 --> 00:29:50,999
Yeah, I know that.

611
00:29:51,000 --> 00:29:53,418
Well, you're a sheep farmer.

612
00:29:53,419 --> 00:29:55,628
(SCOFFS)

613
00:29:55,629 --> 00:29:57,881
Let me ask you something. You feel
good about what you're doing?

614
00:29:57,882 --> 00:29:59,090
What exactly am I doing?

615
00:29:59,091 --> 00:30:00,925
Stealing a guy's girlfriend.
That's what you're doing.

616
00:30:00,926 --> 00:30:02,052
You feel good about that?

617
00:30:02,053 --> 00:30:04,054
Hey, Louise dumped you, my friend.

618
00:30:04,055 --> 00:30:07,057
It's not my fault she wanted
someone with more to offer.

619
00:30:07,058 --> 00:30:09,351
I can give her a lavish home.

620
00:30:09,352 --> 00:30:12,896
Warm blankets, wrapped candies.

621
00:30:12,897 --> 00:30:14,856
Can you say the same, Albert?

622
00:30:14,857 --> 00:30:18,360
Can you give Louise
wrapped candies?

623
00:30:18,361 --> 00:30:19,944
You know what? Fuck you, man.

624
00:30:19,945 --> 00:30:23,782
Yeah, that's what she's doing.
(CLICKS TONGUE)

625
00:30:23,783 --> 00:30:26,276
(SIGHS)

626
00:30:31,248 --> 00:30:33,950
(INDISTINCT CHATTER)

627
00:30:53,062 --> 00:30:54,270
Oh, hey, sweetie.

628
00:30:54,271 --> 00:30:55,438
Hi!

629
00:30:55,439 --> 00:30:57,107
- Hi, Mark.
- Hey, Ed.

630
00:30:57,108 --> 00:30:59,609
Wow! What a long day!

631
00:30:59,610 --> 00:31:00,819
Oh, what happened?

632
00:31:00,820 --> 00:31:05,365
Oh, gosh! Well, like, this one
man wanted me to smoke a cigar

633
00:31:05,366 --> 00:31:08,702
and then ash on his balls
while I'm jerking him off,

634
00:31:08,703 --> 00:31:11,788
and I'm like, "What?
Can I do all that?"

635
00:31:11,789 --> 00:31:13,373
(LAUGHING)

636
00:31:13,374 --> 00:31:15,709
Yeah.

637
00:31:15,710 --> 00:31:18,128
You know, uh, Ruth,
I've been thinking.

638
00:31:18,129 --> 00:31:20,496
About what?

639
00:31:20,631 --> 00:31:22,132
Well, I love you.

640
00:31:22,133 --> 00:31:24,050
Well, I love you, too.

641
00:31:24,051 --> 00:31:27,470
And we've been together
for a long time.

642
00:31:27,471 --> 00:31:28,596
Wh...

643
00:31:28,597 --> 00:31:33,893
What do you think about us
spending the night together?

644
00:31:33,894 --> 00:31:37,147
You mean having sex?

645
00:31:37,148 --> 00:31:38,898
Maybe not right away, you know?

646
00:31:38,899 --> 00:31:41,109
We could maybe lie together
for the first couple of times

647
00:31:41,110 --> 00:31:42,736
and see how it feels,
and then go from there.

648
00:31:42,737 --> 00:31:44,404
But, Eddie, we're Christians.

649
00:31:44,405 --> 00:31:45,989
I know we're Christians

650
00:31:45,990 --> 00:31:49,325
and I want to do the correct
thing in the eyes of the Lord.

651
00:31:49,326 --> 00:31:52,328
But if we really do
love each other,

652
00:31:52,329 --> 00:31:54,581
don't you think God
would be okay with it?

653
00:31:54,582 --> 00:31:57,000
I don't know.

654
00:31:57,001 --> 00:32:00,170
I mean, you're talking about
pre-marital relations.

655
00:32:00,171 --> 00:32:03,673
Oh! You've got a little thing
right here. I'll get it.

656
00:32:03,674 --> 00:32:06,468
Oops. Oopsie.

657
00:32:06,469 --> 00:32:08,511
- Thank you.
- Oh.

658
00:32:08,512 --> 00:32:09,637
That's it, I'm out.

659
00:32:09,638 --> 00:32:10,930
What?

660
00:32:10,931 --> 00:32:14,142
I'm done. I'm leaving.
I'm going to San Francisco.

661
00:32:14,143 --> 00:32:16,144
What, are you serious?
Because of Louise?

662
00:32:16,145 --> 00:32:19,856
Yes, I'm serious. And, yes,
it is because of Louise.

663
00:32:19,857 --> 00:32:21,191
I don't know how I
lasted this long.

664
00:32:21,192 --> 00:32:23,151
I hate the frontier,
I hate everything in it.

665
00:32:23,152 --> 00:32:26,154
Well, what am I gonna do?
I'm your best friend.

666
00:32:26,155 --> 00:32:30,992
I know. That's... That's why
I want you to have these.

667
00:32:30,993 --> 00:32:33,244
Albert, these are
your favorite socks.

668
00:32:33,245 --> 00:32:35,697
Yeah.

669
00:32:35,706 --> 00:32:38,741
And I want you to have that.

670
00:32:41,587 --> 00:32:43,213
Edward, this is your
lucky handkerchief.

671
00:32:43,214 --> 00:32:44,589
Yeah.

672
00:32:44,590 --> 00:32:47,834
It's sticky.

673
00:32:48,427 --> 00:32:51,179
Well, hello to you, too!

674
00:32:51,180 --> 00:32:53,890
James, I found the friendly locals.
(CHUCKLES)

675
00:32:53,891 --> 00:32:57,811
So he said, "Why don't you
go blow your own horse?"

676
00:32:57,812 --> 00:32:59,062
(LAUGHS)

677
00:32:59,063 --> 00:33:01,356
Hey, watch it, pal.

678
00:33:01,357 --> 00:33:03,566
I think you owe me a drink, fella.

679
00:33:03,567 --> 00:33:05,402
The hell I do.

680
00:33:05,403 --> 00:33:07,320
You best watch where you stand.

681
00:33:07,321 --> 00:33:10,281
I don't think you heard me.

682
00:33:10,282 --> 00:33:12,242
I'm thirsty.

683
00:33:12,243 --> 00:33:17,113
Then why don't you go on down
the river and take a dunk?

684
00:33:17,415 --> 00:33:20,074
Last chance, kid.

685
00:33:36,600 --> 00:33:37,809
(EXHALES)

686
00:33:37,810 --> 00:33:40,011
(CHUCKLING)

687
00:33:40,813 --> 00:33:41,938
(GASPS)

688
00:33:41,939 --> 00:33:44,107
(INDISTINCT SHOUTING)

689
00:33:44,108 --> 00:33:45,483
Oh, shit!

690
00:33:45,484 --> 00:33:47,685
(GRUNTS)

691
00:33:49,113 --> 00:33:52,365
Albert, hurry! Get in position!

692
00:33:52,366 --> 00:33:54,817
(GRUNTING)

693
00:33:57,830 --> 00:33:59,622
(GROANING)

694
00:33:59,623 --> 00:34:01,666
We got our own thing
going on over here.

695
00:34:01,667 --> 00:34:03,293
Yeah, nobody needs
to get in on this.

696
00:34:03,294 --> 00:34:05,420
We're both getting
hurt pretty badly.

697
00:34:05,421 --> 00:34:07,505
(GRUNTING)

698
00:34:07,506 --> 00:34:09,966
(GROANING)

699
00:34:09,967 --> 00:34:11,760
Nobody needs to come over here.

700
00:34:11,761 --> 00:34:14,054
This fight is way more
violent than yours...

701
00:34:14,055 --> 00:34:16,473
All those other guys' fights.

702
00:34:16,474 --> 00:34:18,800
(GROANING)

703
00:34:26,484 --> 00:34:27,984
(GRUNTING)

704
00:34:27,985 --> 00:34:30,153
- (GROANING)
- Oh!

705
00:34:30,154 --> 00:34:31,488
You actually hit me!

706
00:34:31,489 --> 00:34:32,614
I'm so sorry.

707
00:34:32,615 --> 00:34:33,698
You fucker!

708
00:34:33,699 --> 00:34:35,033
I put a new move in there.

709
00:34:35,034 --> 00:34:36,409
You don't just put a new move in.

710
00:34:36,410 --> 00:34:38,861
That's why we have the meetings.

711
00:34:41,040 --> 00:34:43,491
(GROANING)

712
00:34:45,503 --> 00:34:47,337
That's where it hurts.
Like, right there.

713
00:34:47,338 --> 00:34:48,713
Like, right underneath my eye.

714
00:34:48,714 --> 00:34:50,006
Yeah, there's a little red spot.

715
00:34:50,007 --> 00:34:51,758
Ow! Careful, it's tender.

716
00:34:51,759 --> 00:34:54,335
(GRUNTING)

717
00:35:12,697 --> 00:35:14,864
- Thank you.
- Sure.

718
00:35:14,865 --> 00:35:17,066
(GUNSHOT)

719
00:35:17,410 --> 00:35:19,777
Shit. Come on.

720
00:35:21,288 --> 00:35:22,414
Whoa!

721
00:35:22,415 --> 00:35:23,540
(SIGHS)

722
00:35:23,541 --> 00:35:25,083
Sorry about that.

723
00:35:25,084 --> 00:35:27,127
It's kind of a regular
occurrence around here.

724
00:35:27,128 --> 00:35:29,212
- Really?
- Yeah.

725
00:35:29,213 --> 00:35:30,380
(BOTH SIGH)

726
00:35:30,381 --> 00:35:33,550
Hey, pretty fast hands back there.

727
00:35:33,551 --> 00:35:35,760
- Oh...
- I guess you're a real hero.

728
00:35:35,761 --> 00:35:39,514
Me? No, I'm not the hero.

729
00:35:39,515 --> 00:35:42,142
I'm the guy in the crowd making
fun of the hero's shirt.

730
00:35:42,143 --> 00:35:43,601
- That's who I am.
- Oh.

731
00:35:43,602 --> 00:35:47,188
- Hey, look who's here.
- Who's this?

732
00:35:47,189 --> 00:35:48,356
This is Plugger.

733
00:35:48,357 --> 00:35:50,934
Hey, Plugger.

734
00:35:51,485 --> 00:35:54,446
So, that... That was your
brother in there, huh?

735
00:35:54,447 --> 00:35:57,907
Yeah, Lewis. He's always
been a little rambunctious.

736
00:35:57,908 --> 00:36:01,494
Yeah, he seems like a great guy.
I'm Albert, by the way.

737
00:36:01,495 --> 00:36:03,204
Anna.

738
00:36:03,205 --> 00:36:04,622
You guys just got into town?

739
00:36:04,623 --> 00:36:06,166
Yeah.

740
00:36:06,167 --> 00:36:08,251
Welcome to our awesome town.

741
00:36:08,252 --> 00:36:09,586
Thanks.

742
00:36:09,587 --> 00:36:11,963
Lewis and I just came
out from Kansas City.

743
00:36:11,964 --> 00:36:13,465
Oh, Kansas.

744
00:36:13,466 --> 00:36:15,258
No, it's in Missouri.

745
00:36:15,259 --> 00:36:17,761
Oh, right. That's
annoying and weird.

746
00:36:17,762 --> 00:36:18,928
We were wanting a change,

747
00:36:18,929 --> 00:36:21,890
so we came out to the frontier
looking to build a farm.

748
00:36:21,891 --> 00:36:23,391
- Oh, that's what I do.
- Really?

749
00:36:23,392 --> 00:36:25,602
Yeah, I got a farm about
2 miles from here.

750
00:36:25,603 --> 00:36:26,895
Oh, cattle?

751
00:36:26,896 --> 00:36:28,521
Uh, no, sheep.

752
00:36:28,522 --> 00:36:30,106
- Oh.
- Yep.

753
00:36:30,107 --> 00:36:32,734
Well, that's got to be
fulfilling work, though, right?

754
00:36:32,735 --> 00:36:33,943
Ah, yeah, it's great.

755
00:36:33,944 --> 00:36:37,489
It's like being a dog walker
for 150 really stupid dogs.

756
00:36:37,490 --> 00:36:38,823
(LAUGHS)

757
00:36:38,824 --> 00:36:40,575
- ALBERT: Oh, shit, Plugger!
- ANNA: Oh, my God!

758
00:36:40,576 --> 00:36:42,577
- Plugger, give it to me. (GROANING)
- Jesus, what is that?

759
00:36:42,578 --> 00:36:44,662
It's the mayor.

760
00:36:44,663 --> 00:36:46,164
- (GLASS SHATTERS)
- (WOMAN SCREAMING)

761
00:36:46,165 --> 00:36:49,158
Oh, shit!

762
00:36:49,794 --> 00:36:52,379
So, how did you guys meet?

763
00:36:52,380 --> 00:36:55,131
Uh, she moved to town
a couple years ago

764
00:36:55,132 --> 00:36:58,134
to take over the schoolmarm job.

765
00:36:58,135 --> 00:37:02,681
Our old schoolmarm got her throat
slit by a fast-moving tumbleweed.

766
00:37:02,682 --> 00:37:04,474
- Oh, my God!
- Yeah.

767
00:37:04,475 --> 00:37:05,767
In front of the kids?

768
00:37:05,768 --> 00:37:08,103
Oh, yeah. Yeah. All of them.

769
00:37:08,104 --> 00:37:09,312
ANNA: Let me help you.

770
00:37:09,313 --> 00:37:13,182
That is just painful to watch.

771
00:37:14,443 --> 00:37:18,863
And, you know, it's like the
whole time we were together

772
00:37:18,864 --> 00:37:21,741
I just remember thinking,

773
00:37:21,742 --> 00:37:25,695
"How can I possibly be this happy?

774
00:37:25,705 --> 00:37:26,788
"She likes me now,

775
00:37:26,789 --> 00:37:28,748
"but one day, she
is gonna figure out

776
00:37:28,749 --> 00:37:31,534
"that she is too good for me."

777
00:37:31,919 --> 00:37:36,414
And then one day, she did.

778
00:37:36,841 --> 00:37:42,795
I feel like I finally tricked one
girl into falling in love with me

779
00:37:43,055 --> 00:37:45,849
and then I lost her.

780
00:37:45,850 --> 00:37:49,594
I think you have this
whole thing upside down.

781
00:37:49,603 --> 00:37:52,188
I mean, it sounds like you've bent
over backwards for this girl,

782
00:37:52,189 --> 00:37:53,732
but what has she given you back?

783
00:37:53,733 --> 00:37:56,359
I told you, she allowed
me to be happy

784
00:37:56,360 --> 00:37:58,695
in a part of the world that
is otherwise a living hell.

785
00:37:58,696 --> 00:38:00,613
"Allowed"? Wow.

786
00:38:00,614 --> 00:38:02,615
That's kind of fucked up that
you would use that word.

787
00:38:02,616 --> 00:38:04,909
You know that, right?

788
00:38:04,910 --> 00:38:08,621
All I know is that there
is nothing for me out here

789
00:38:08,622 --> 00:38:11,115
if I don't have her.

790
00:38:11,625 --> 00:38:13,418
ANNA: Well,

791
00:38:13,419 --> 00:38:16,296
if this Foy guy is
that much of a douche,

792
00:38:16,297 --> 00:38:19,591
she'll figure it out
if she's smart.

793
00:38:19,592 --> 00:38:22,218
Sometimes a girl has to get a
few assholes out of her system

794
00:38:22,219 --> 00:38:24,721
before she realizes what
a good guy looks like.

795
00:38:24,722 --> 00:38:27,090
Mmm. Maybe.

796
00:38:29,226 --> 00:38:30,894
(COUGHING)

797
00:38:30,895 --> 00:38:32,854
- Ah!
- You okay?

798
00:38:32,855 --> 00:38:36,066
(COUGHING) This is actually
my first cigarette ever.

799
00:38:36,067 --> 00:38:39,352
(CHUCKLING) Oh, my God.

800
00:38:40,071 --> 00:38:42,272
(GASPS)

801
00:38:42,656 --> 00:38:44,407
- Oh, shit.
- Diamondback.

802
00:38:44,408 --> 00:38:46,159
- It's a diamondback, yeah.
- Fuck.

803
00:38:46,160 --> 00:38:48,912
It's okay, just hold perfectly
still, and it'll go away.

804
00:38:48,913 --> 00:38:51,489
Okay, okay.

805
00:38:53,751 --> 00:38:56,795
I don't think you
should leave tomorrow.

806
00:38:56,796 --> 00:38:58,755
At least stay through the weekend.

807
00:38:58,756 --> 00:39:00,423
Isn't the fair on Saturday?

808
00:39:00,424 --> 00:39:03,718
Oh, fuck that. I'm not
going to the stupid fair.

809
00:39:03,719 --> 00:39:05,970
Louise is gonna be there,
and she's gonna be with Foy.

810
00:39:05,971 --> 00:39:07,305
I don't want to put myself through

811
00:39:07,306 --> 00:39:08,765
that kind of fucking aggravation.

812
00:39:08,766 --> 00:39:11,059
Yeah, well, I'll go with you.

813
00:39:11,060 --> 00:39:13,478
No better way to make your
ex-girlfriend want you back more

814
00:39:13,479 --> 00:39:15,814
than to let her see you
with another girl.

815
00:39:15,815 --> 00:39:17,023
I don't know.

816
00:39:17,024 --> 00:39:19,776
Especially a smoking-hot girl.

817
00:39:19,777 --> 00:39:23,238
When she sees me, she'll
be intimidated as fuck.

818
00:39:23,239 --> 00:39:25,115
Oh, you're very modest, I see.

819
00:39:25,116 --> 00:39:28,076
I'm a little cocky.
But I got great tits.

820
00:39:28,077 --> 00:39:29,619
- (LAUGHING)
- (RATTLING)

821
00:39:29,620 --> 00:39:31,454
- Oh!
- Sorry. Sorry, sir.

822
00:39:31,455 --> 00:39:34,866
Sorry, sir. Sorry, sir.

823
00:39:41,799 --> 00:39:44,167
(HORSE NEIGHING)

824
00:39:53,519 --> 00:39:56,262
(KEYS JANGLING)

825
00:39:57,273 --> 00:40:01,226
Barnes, wake up.
Brought you a visitor.

826
00:40:02,945 --> 00:40:05,280
You stupid son of a bitch.

827
00:40:05,281 --> 00:40:07,365
You shot the pastor's son.

828
00:40:07,366 --> 00:40:09,284
You realize they're probably
gonna hang you for this?

829
00:40:09,285 --> 00:40:12,904
Who gives a fuck what they want?

830
00:40:13,622 --> 00:40:16,833
When Clinch gets into town, it's
not gonna matter what they do.

831
00:40:16,834 --> 00:40:18,043
He'll bust me out

832
00:40:18,044 --> 00:40:21,871
and anyone who tries to stop
him is gonna be a dead man.

833
00:40:25,509 --> 00:40:28,511
You know, one of these days

834
00:40:28,512 --> 00:40:31,514
there's gonna be a man
who's faster than Clinch

835
00:40:31,515 --> 00:40:34,851
and tougher, and stronger.

836
00:40:34,852 --> 00:40:37,979
And then Clinch is
gonna be the dead man.

837
00:40:37,980 --> 00:40:40,690
And I'm gonna smoke a
fucking cigar to celebrate.

838
00:40:40,691 --> 00:40:45,028
(SCOFFS) I don't think Clinch would
like you talking about him that way.

839
00:40:45,029 --> 00:40:48,281
Not a nice thing for a man's
wife to say about her husband.

840
00:40:48,282 --> 00:40:50,450
Yeah, well,

841
00:40:50,451 --> 00:40:54,904
let's see if he gets here before you
find yourself at the end of a rope.

842
00:40:56,374 --> 00:40:58,616
Tick-tock.

843
00:41:01,712 --> 00:41:03,997
(DOOR CLOSES)

844
00:41:18,771 --> 00:41:21,097
(SHEEP BLEATING)

845
00:41:21,816 --> 00:41:23,274
Oh, no, no, no. No, no, no, no!

846
00:41:23,275 --> 00:41:24,567
Guys, no, no, no.

847
00:41:24,568 --> 00:41:27,237
Andrew, Jonathan, no.
Go, go, go. Go home.

848
00:41:27,238 --> 00:41:29,647
(BLEATING)

849
00:41:30,241 --> 00:41:32,242
Hey, sheep boy.

850
00:41:32,243 --> 00:41:33,910
Hey.

851
00:41:33,911 --> 00:41:37,914
Jesus, are you okay? I heard about
your brother getting arrested.

852
00:41:37,915 --> 00:41:41,084
Yeah, I'm fine. And listen, Albert.

853
00:41:41,085 --> 00:41:43,086
Don't worry about Lewis, okay?

854
00:41:43,087 --> 00:41:46,423
Anything that happens to him right
now is his own fault. Got it?

855
00:41:46,424 --> 00:41:48,216
Yeah. Whatever you say, sure.

856
00:41:48,217 --> 00:41:51,386
Good. Let's hit this fair, because
you know what I wanna do?

857
00:41:51,387 --> 00:41:53,263
Eat hot food in 100-degree weather?

858
00:41:53,264 --> 00:41:56,016
No, get my picture taken.
I've never done it before.

859
00:41:56,017 --> 00:41:57,767
- That's horse shit.
- No, it's the truth.

860
00:41:57,768 --> 00:41:59,769
- No, that's horse shit.
- Whoa! Oh, that is horse shit.

861
00:41:59,770 --> 00:42:03,223
Okay. All right.

862
00:42:27,715 --> 00:42:30,833
Okay, everybody hold still!

863
00:42:31,260 --> 00:42:33,136
You know, supposedly,
there's some guy in Texas

864
00:42:33,137 --> 00:42:35,430
who smiled one time while he
was getting his picture taken.

865
00:42:35,431 --> 00:42:37,140
Shut the fuck up. Are you serious?

866
00:42:37,141 --> 00:42:39,225
We were just talking about
that last week. Is that true?

867
00:42:39,226 --> 00:42:42,645
I don't know. I mean, I heard it
somewhere. I don't know if it's true.

868
00:42:42,646 --> 00:42:45,774
Yeah, it sounds like the kind of
bullshit somebody would make up.

869
00:42:45,775 --> 00:42:49,435
Okay. Everybody hold still.

870
00:42:54,075 --> 00:42:56,076
- Oh, my God!
- Holy shit!

871
00:42:56,077 --> 00:42:58,661
(BOTH SCREAMING)

872
00:42:58,662 --> 00:43:01,155
Hold still!

873
00:43:01,916 --> 00:43:03,833
God! This fucking fair!

874
00:43:03,834 --> 00:43:05,251
Every year, something
like this happens.

875
00:43:05,252 --> 00:43:06,419
Every year, people die.

876
00:43:06,420 --> 00:43:07,837
- Really?
- Every year.

877
00:43:07,838 --> 00:43:09,005
Last year, there
were two gunfights,

878
00:43:09,006 --> 00:43:11,007
there was a knife fight,
a stage collapsed,

879
00:43:11,008 --> 00:43:12,717
there was a drowning, and
the Indians attacked.

880
00:43:12,718 --> 00:43:15,387
- God, why are the Indians always so mad?
- I don't know.

881
00:43:15,388 --> 00:43:17,931
I mean, we're basically splitting
this country 50-50 with them.

882
00:43:17,932 --> 00:43:20,425
They're just selfish.

883
00:43:21,852 --> 00:43:23,770
Ladies and gentlemen!

884
00:43:23,771 --> 00:43:26,231
Step right up, step right up!

885
00:43:26,232 --> 00:43:27,524
Try a sample of...

886
00:43:27,525 --> 00:43:30,068
Sir and madam, may I
divert your attention

887
00:43:30,069 --> 00:43:31,820
over here just for a moment?

888
00:43:31,821 --> 00:43:35,532
Welcome, welcome. Can I
interest you in a miracle cure?

889
00:43:35,533 --> 00:43:38,159
I have only the finest
healing tonics and elixirs

890
00:43:38,160 --> 00:43:40,704
procured from the farthest
corners of the globe.

891
00:43:40,705 --> 00:43:43,415
"Ogden's Celebrated
Stomach Bitters."

892
00:43:43,416 --> 00:43:45,542
Can I just ask, celebrated by who?

893
00:43:45,543 --> 00:43:47,419
Who's celebrating about
stomach bitters?

894
00:43:47,420 --> 00:43:49,004
God. Look at the ingredients.

895
00:43:49,005 --> 00:43:52,340
"Cocaine, alcohol, morphine,
mercury with chalk."

896
00:43:52,341 --> 00:43:54,592
What the hell is
"mercury with chalk"?

897
00:43:54,593 --> 00:43:55,719
Science!

898
00:43:55,720 --> 00:43:57,429
And "red flannel."

899
00:43:57,430 --> 00:43:59,639
Red flannel? There's shirt in here?

900
00:43:59,640 --> 00:44:00,890
Pieces of shirt.

901
00:44:00,891 --> 00:44:02,809
Okay, thank you very much.

902
00:44:02,810 --> 00:44:04,394
Would you like to try?

903
00:44:04,395 --> 00:44:06,021
- ALBERT: Oh, my God.
- ANNA: What?

904
00:44:06,022 --> 00:44:08,023
That's them. That's them.
(STUTTERING)

905
00:44:08,024 --> 00:44:10,483
Quick, pretend you just
said something funny to me.

906
00:44:10,484 --> 00:44:13,361
(LAUGHING) Oh, my God!
You are... You are so hilarious!

907
00:44:13,362 --> 00:44:15,071
Where do you come up... No, shit!

908
00:44:15,072 --> 00:44:16,406
You pretend I said something funny.

909
00:44:16,407 --> 00:44:17,657
Albert, stop. Stop.

910
00:44:17,658 --> 00:44:18,908
Just introduce me. Come on.

911
00:44:18,909 --> 00:44:20,118
I'm not gonna introduce you...

912
00:44:20,119 --> 00:44:22,746
- Oh, hi!
- Hey.

913
00:44:22,747 --> 00:44:26,249
Uh, Foy and Louise, right?

914
00:44:26,250 --> 00:44:27,584
- Mmm-hmm.
- That's right.

915
00:44:27,585 --> 00:44:29,836
Uh, this is Anna. She's...

916
00:44:29,837 --> 00:44:32,047
- I'm his girlfriend.
- She's my girlfriend.

917
00:44:32,048 --> 00:44:34,924
- ANNA: Mmm-hmm.
- She's the new GF. Big time.

918
00:44:34,925 --> 00:44:36,801
A lot of sexual activity.

919
00:44:36,802 --> 00:44:40,847
All the time. I live inside her.

920
00:44:40,848 --> 00:44:42,307
So, if you want to
send me a letter,

921
00:44:42,308 --> 00:44:46,436
you gotta address it
care of her vagina.

922
00:44:46,437 --> 00:44:48,063
Yep.

923
00:44:48,064 --> 00:44:49,105
I have that skirt.

924
00:44:49,106 --> 00:44:51,107
- Oh, you do?
- Mmm-hmm.

925
00:44:51,108 --> 00:44:53,234
Yeah, I wore it to the
fair, like, two years ago.

926
00:44:53,235 --> 00:44:55,403
But good for you for
trying to bring it back.

927
00:44:55,404 --> 00:44:57,655
Well, I figure only
a complete idiot

928
00:44:57,656 --> 00:45:00,533
would throw away a
perfectly good thing.

929
00:45:00,534 --> 00:45:02,744
We were gonna go check out the
shooting gallery over there.

930
00:45:02,745 --> 00:45:04,037
- You guys wanna join?
- What?

931
00:45:04,038 --> 00:45:05,538
Yeah, it'd be fun, right?

932
00:45:05,539 --> 00:45:07,916
Oh, yes, and let's make
things interesting.

933
00:45:07,917 --> 00:45:10,377
A nickel a target.

934
00:45:10,378 --> 00:45:13,380
You know, that's actually, uh,
a little rich for my blood.

935
00:45:13,381 --> 00:45:14,714
Uh, how about a penny?

936
00:45:14,715 --> 00:45:18,843
What's the matter, Albert? Is
business (IMITATING BLEATING) bad?

937
00:45:18,844 --> 00:45:21,429
(CHUCKLING)

938
00:45:21,430 --> 00:45:23,682
No, no. A penny it is.

939
00:45:23,683 --> 00:45:26,810
Good Lord, Albert, you're
such a "sheepskate." Oh!

940
00:45:26,811 --> 00:45:28,019
(LAUGHING) Wow!

941
00:45:28,020 --> 00:45:29,979
Oh...

942
00:45:29,980 --> 00:45:31,940
Let's go, Louise. You
can "shear" me on.

943
00:45:31,941 --> 00:45:33,983
Oh, no, I didn't!

944
00:45:33,984 --> 00:45:36,194
- LOUISE: You're so funny, baby.
- FOY: Thank you.

945
00:45:36,195 --> 00:45:37,362
Shall we?

946
00:45:37,363 --> 00:45:38,488
(WHISPERING) Come on.

947
00:45:38,489 --> 00:45:39,531
Wait, wait, no, no.

948
00:45:39,532 --> 00:45:40,865
There you are, my good man.

949
00:45:40,866 --> 00:45:42,659
Indeed.

950
00:45:42,660 --> 00:45:46,079
Oh, wow. That seems unnecessary.

951
00:45:46,080 --> 00:45:49,824
What's wrong with ducks
or rabbits or something?

952
00:45:52,962 --> 00:45:55,163
Mmm-hmm.

953
00:46:03,305 --> 00:46:06,099
Six shots, six hits.
Quite the marksman!

954
00:46:06,100 --> 00:46:07,434
There you go, ma'am.

955
00:46:07,435 --> 00:46:09,310
- Thank you, baby.
- (CHUCKLING)

956
00:46:09,311 --> 00:46:11,596
(BOTH MOANING)

957
00:46:12,440 --> 00:46:14,724
Care to try?

958
00:46:17,611 --> 00:46:20,321
You got it.

959
00:46:20,322 --> 00:46:23,149
Just breathe.

960
00:46:31,334 --> 00:46:34,118
(CROWD LAUGHING)

961
00:46:35,212 --> 00:46:38,131
Seems you owe me six
cents, sheep herder.

962
00:46:38,132 --> 00:46:39,632
Yeah, yeah, I know.

963
00:46:39,633 --> 00:46:41,760
Jesus.

964
00:46:41,761 --> 00:46:43,678
Wait. Hang on a sec.

965
00:46:43,679 --> 00:46:46,056
You wanna make this interesting?

966
00:46:46,057 --> 00:46:49,142
If I can shoot six out of six on
Albert's behalf, you owe him a dollar.

967
00:46:49,143 --> 00:46:51,019
If I can't,

968
00:46:51,020 --> 00:46:52,896
- he owes you a dollar.
- Wait, what?

969
00:46:52,897 --> 00:46:54,689
- A dollar?
- I've never seen a dollar.

970
00:46:54,690 --> 00:46:55,774
Nobody's got a dollar!

971
00:46:55,775 --> 00:46:56,900
Let us see the dollar!

972
00:46:56,901 --> 00:46:59,069
Well, this is interesting.

973
00:46:59,070 --> 00:47:03,073
All right. Do your best, ma'am.

974
00:47:03,074 --> 00:47:05,283
(IMITATING BLEATING)

975
00:47:05,284 --> 00:47:06,910
How fast can this thing go?

976
00:47:06,911 --> 00:47:10,538
Oh, you can play double or triple
speeds, but that's for the experts.

977
00:47:10,539 --> 00:47:12,740
As fast as you can.

978
00:47:19,465 --> 00:47:22,125
(CROWD EXCLAIMS)

979
00:47:23,094 --> 00:47:25,011
Holy shit!

980
00:47:25,012 --> 00:47:26,513
Congratulations!

981
00:47:26,514 --> 00:47:28,598
You're a winner!

982
00:47:28,599 --> 00:47:30,725
Thank you.

983
00:47:30,726 --> 00:47:33,595
Come on, you owe him a dollar.

984
00:47:35,981 --> 00:47:37,273
(CROWD GASPS)

985
00:47:37,274 --> 00:47:38,400
There it is!

986
00:47:38,401 --> 00:47:39,484
It's beautiful!

987
00:47:39,485 --> 00:47:42,729
Take your hat off, boy.
That's a dollar bill!

988
00:47:44,865 --> 00:47:48,451
Well, a man whose girlfriend
does his shooting for him.

989
00:47:48,452 --> 00:47:50,995
Isn't that a fine how-do-you-do?

990
00:47:50,996 --> 00:47:53,707
(CROWD LAUGHING)

991
00:47:53,708 --> 00:47:56,876
I said, "Isn't that a
fine how-do-you-do?"

992
00:47:56,877 --> 00:47:58,336
(LAUGHING HARDER)

993
00:47:58,337 --> 00:48:00,505
(LAUGHING SARCASTICALLY)

994
00:48:00,506 --> 00:48:03,049
(STAMMERING) How is that funny?
What's funny about that?

995
00:48:03,050 --> 00:48:04,968
"How do you do" is a greeting.
Why is that funny?

996
00:48:04,969 --> 00:48:06,594
You, why are you laughing?

997
00:48:06,595 --> 00:48:10,340
I don't know. He was laughing.

998
00:48:10,474 --> 00:48:13,268
It seems your ex-boyfriend
doesn't have a sense of humor.

999
00:48:13,269 --> 00:48:14,811
I can see why you dumped him.

1000
00:48:14,812 --> 00:48:16,563
Hey!

1001
00:48:16,564 --> 00:48:18,356
You wanna back up that
attitude, asshole?

1002
00:48:18,357 --> 00:48:19,607
Oh, you are kidding.

1003
00:48:19,608 --> 00:48:22,277
Never been more serious in
my life. You and me, pistols.

1004
00:48:22,278 --> 00:48:23,778
You wouldn't have a prayer, kiddo.

1005
00:48:23,779 --> 00:48:25,530
Tomorrow, 8:00 a.m., sharp.

1006
00:48:25,531 --> 00:48:27,365
All right, challenge accepted!

1007
00:48:27,366 --> 00:48:29,367
Oh, gosh. Tomorrow is bad for me,

1008
00:48:29,368 --> 00:48:31,161
and I really wanna be there.

1009
00:48:31,162 --> 00:48:33,288
Why don't we say a week from today?

1010
00:48:33,289 --> 00:48:35,498
That works for you, right, Albert?

1011
00:48:35,499 --> 00:48:38,460
Yeah, yeah, that's fine.
A week from today.

1012
00:48:38,461 --> 00:48:41,921
I got sheep stuff I gotta
do tomorrow, anyway.

1013
00:48:41,922 --> 00:48:43,631
One week.

1014
00:48:43,632 --> 00:48:44,799
Come on, Louise.

1015
00:48:44,800 --> 00:48:47,510
I'll buy you some sugared
butter shavings.

1016
00:48:47,511 --> 00:48:49,879
(IMITATING BLEATING)

1017
00:48:52,600 --> 00:48:54,559
Oh, shit!

1018
00:48:54,560 --> 00:48:55,685
Wow.

1019
00:48:55,686 --> 00:48:58,021
What the fuck did I just do?

1020
00:48:58,022 --> 00:49:01,232
You just challenged
Foy to a gunfight.

1021
00:49:01,233 --> 00:49:02,484
I have no idea what just happened.

1022
00:49:02,485 --> 00:49:04,110
(STAMMERING)
I was, like, out of my body.

1023
00:49:04,111 --> 00:49:06,446
Albert, did you see the
look on Louise's face?

1024
00:49:06,447 --> 00:49:07,572
No. Why?

1025
00:49:07,573 --> 00:49:10,575
She was aroused. She was impressed.

1026
00:49:10,576 --> 00:49:13,661
You had a fire in your belly
for a second there, pal.

1027
00:49:13,662 --> 00:49:15,538
Bet you never showed
her that side before.

1028
00:49:15,539 --> 00:49:17,374
Yeah, I don't have that side to me.

1029
00:49:17,375 --> 00:49:19,084
I honestly don't know
what just happened.

1030
00:49:19,085 --> 00:49:20,919
Albert, you got her attention.

1031
00:49:20,920 --> 00:49:22,379
You beat this guy at a gunfight,

1032
00:49:22,380 --> 00:49:24,547
I bet she thinks twice
about dumping you.

1033
00:49:24,548 --> 00:49:26,216
Anna, I can't be in a gunfight.

1034
00:49:26,217 --> 00:49:27,300
What am I, Clinch Leatherwood here?

1035
00:49:27,301 --> 00:49:29,219
- I'll get killed!
- Whoa!

1036
00:49:29,220 --> 00:49:31,346
Why would you say that?

1037
00:49:31,347 --> 00:49:34,391
Because he's the most vicious
gunfighter in the territory,

1038
00:49:34,392 --> 00:49:35,558
which I am not!

1039
00:49:35,559 --> 00:49:38,520
No, you're not Clinch Leatherwood.

1040
00:49:38,521 --> 00:49:40,063
You're gonna be okay, Albert.

1041
00:49:40,064 --> 00:49:42,732
That week I just bought you is enough
time for me to teach you how to shoot.

1042
00:49:42,733 --> 00:49:43,858
You'll be fine.

1043
00:49:43,859 --> 00:49:45,151
Oh, yeah, by the way,
that's another thing.

1044
00:49:45,152 --> 00:49:47,153
How the fuck can you
shoot like that?

1045
00:49:47,154 --> 00:49:48,655
Who the hell are you?

1046
00:49:48,656 --> 00:49:52,492
My father was a gun maker. I could
shoot a gun before I could walk.

1047
00:49:52,493 --> 00:49:55,495
Whatever. I'm sick to my stomach.
My stomach is in knots.

1048
00:49:55,496 --> 00:49:57,414
You're worked up, that's
what it is. Let's get a drink.

1049
00:49:57,415 --> 00:49:58,581
Come on.

1050
00:49:58,582 --> 00:50:00,959
Hey! It's our sweet young couple.

1051
00:50:00,960 --> 00:50:04,954
Could I interest you folks
in some Wildroot Cream-Oil?

1052
00:50:04,964 --> 00:50:07,498
(CROWD SCREAMING)

1053
00:50:11,762 --> 00:50:12,846
People die at the fair.

1054
00:50:12,847 --> 00:50:15,632
People die at the fair.

1055
00:50:31,115 --> 00:50:33,742
ANNA: Okay, so you're gonna
take your right thumb,

1056
00:50:33,743 --> 00:50:35,243
put it all the way to the left.

1057
00:50:35,244 --> 00:50:37,996
Cross it over, cradle
it right in there,

1058
00:50:37,997 --> 00:50:39,497
and then just extend it
straight through your...

1059
00:50:39,498 --> 00:50:41,082
- Like that?
- Straight.

1060
00:50:41,083 --> 00:50:43,585
Wow, you've never
fired a gun before.

1061
00:50:43,586 --> 00:50:45,420
I... I have not. I own a gun.

1062
00:50:45,421 --> 00:50:47,213
No, I fired a gun at
the shooting gallery.

1063
00:50:47,214 --> 00:50:49,341
Yeah, but those were quarter loads.
These are full loads.

1064
00:50:49,342 --> 00:50:53,219
Okay, all right, get ready. I'm about
to shoot a full load at your cans.

1065
00:50:53,220 --> 00:50:55,263
(LAUGHING)
Shut the fuck up and focus.

1066
00:50:55,264 --> 00:50:57,507
All right. Okay.

1067
00:51:03,981 --> 00:51:05,065
(SIGHS)

1068
00:51:05,066 --> 00:51:06,149
This is never gonna work.

1069
00:51:06,150 --> 00:51:07,984
- This is not working.
- It's gonna work.

1070
00:51:07,985 --> 00:51:10,403
It's gonna work and Louise is
gonna come running back to you.

1071
00:51:10,404 --> 00:51:11,654
How the hell do you
get these things out?

1072
00:51:11,655 --> 00:51:12,864
(LAUGHING)

1073
00:51:12,865 --> 00:51:15,867
I'm sitting there
jerking that thing off.

1074
00:51:15,868 --> 00:51:18,486
(SIGHS)

1075
00:51:18,579 --> 00:51:20,622
Hey, why are you
being so nice to me?

1076
00:51:20,623 --> 00:51:21,831
What do you mean?

1077
00:51:21,832 --> 00:51:24,209
Well, I mean, you show
up out of nowhere.

1078
00:51:24,210 --> 00:51:28,546
You're this complete anomaly in my
world of terribleness out here.

1079
00:51:28,547 --> 00:51:31,424
I mean, you must have a million
better things to do than this.

1080
00:51:31,425 --> 00:51:33,677
What, I can't make a new friend?

1081
00:51:33,678 --> 00:51:35,845
You sure look like
you could use one.

1082
00:51:35,846 --> 00:51:39,057
I guess. I mean, I just... I just
don't know anything about you.

1083
00:51:39,058 --> 00:51:41,101
Well, can I ask you
something about you?

1084
00:51:41,102 --> 00:51:43,386
Yeah, sure.

1085
00:51:43,521 --> 00:51:46,264
Why do you love Louise?

1086
00:51:46,774 --> 00:51:49,776
(SIGHS)
I mean, take your pick. She's...

1087
00:51:49,777 --> 00:51:51,277
I feel great when I'm with her.

1088
00:51:51,278 --> 00:51:55,240
She's classy, she's fun,
she's insanely gorgeous.

1089
00:51:55,241 --> 00:51:58,118
Hey, no. Look, she's
really pretty, yes.

1090
00:51:58,119 --> 00:51:59,869
But honestly, and I'm
sorry to say this,

1091
00:51:59,870 --> 00:52:02,038
I don't see what else
she's got going for her.

1092
00:52:02,039 --> 00:52:05,709
My impression was that she was a
little sour and self-absorbed.

1093
00:52:05,710 --> 00:52:07,836
And for a guy with so
much going for him,

1094
00:52:07,837 --> 00:52:09,087
I just thought that maybe you...

1095
00:52:09,088 --> 00:52:11,464
I don't know what you think
I have going for me, but...

1096
00:52:11,465 --> 00:52:12,966
You see? There you go again,

1097
00:52:12,967 --> 00:52:14,217
just cutting yourself down.

1098
00:52:14,218 --> 00:52:15,927
You act like this
girl was performing

1099
00:52:15,928 --> 00:52:18,138
some kind of a charitable
act by dating you.

1100
00:52:18,139 --> 00:52:19,514
Albert, you're a catch.

1101
00:52:19,515 --> 00:52:21,975
You're sweet, you're
funny, you're smart.

1102
00:52:21,976 --> 00:52:23,852
You've made something
of yourself out here.

1103
00:52:23,853 --> 00:52:25,395
You know, a lot of
people can't say that.

1104
00:52:25,396 --> 00:52:26,980
You're a good sheep farmer.

1105
00:52:26,981 --> 00:52:29,566
Oh, my God, please.
I suck at sheep.

1106
00:52:29,567 --> 00:52:31,109
Louise was right. I can't
keep track of them.

1107
00:52:31,110 --> 00:52:32,902
There was a sheep in the
whorehouse last week.

1108
00:52:32,903 --> 00:52:34,320
- Really?
- Yeah.

1109
00:52:34,321 --> 00:52:36,322
Wandered in there, and then
when I went to pick it up,

1110
00:52:36,323 --> 00:52:38,074
somehow, it had made $20.

1111
00:52:38,075 --> 00:52:40,610
(LAUGHING)

1112
00:52:41,620 --> 00:52:45,915
But, you know, thank you
anyway for what you said.

1113
00:52:45,916 --> 00:52:48,835
Oh, look, the West fucking sucks,

1114
00:52:48,836 --> 00:52:50,587
but the frontier is
not your problem.

1115
00:52:50,588 --> 00:52:51,755
It's you.

1116
00:52:51,756 --> 00:52:53,923
You need a little confidence
boost, my friend.

1117
00:52:53,924 --> 00:52:56,459
Now, aim up, sheep boy.

1118
00:53:05,311 --> 00:53:06,770
- Oh!
- Hey!

1119
00:53:06,771 --> 00:53:08,188
- There we go!
- See? There!

1120
00:53:08,189 --> 00:53:09,814
All righty. That's one.

1121
00:53:09,815 --> 00:53:14,611
So, all I gotta do is get Foy to let
me shoot 16 times before he shoots

1122
00:53:14,612 --> 00:53:15,862
and then I win!

1123
00:53:15,863 --> 00:53:17,280
You're gonna do great, I promise.

1124
00:53:17,281 --> 00:53:19,983
- Easy.
- We're gonna get there.

1125
00:54:28,853 --> 00:54:31,387
(GUNSHOT)

1126
00:55:14,440 --> 00:55:16,066
- (LAUGHING) Hey!
- Yes!

1127
00:55:16,067 --> 00:55:18,026
(SCREAMING)

1128
00:55:18,027 --> 00:55:19,110
Oh!

1129
00:55:19,111 --> 00:55:23,231
God damn it, Albert!
No more friends!

1130
00:55:29,955 --> 00:55:31,748
ANNA:
You know, you did great today.

1131
00:55:31,749 --> 00:55:33,750
So much better than last week.

1132
00:55:33,751 --> 00:55:36,753
And I have a surprise for you.

1133
00:55:36,754 --> 00:55:39,047
You have earned one of Anna Barnes'

1134
00:55:39,048 --> 00:55:43,251
very special
super-super-secret cookies.

1135
00:55:43,761 --> 00:55:46,096
Mmm-hmm.

1136
00:55:46,097 --> 00:55:48,014
- Wait, what is this?
- Mmm-hmm?

1137
00:55:48,015 --> 00:55:49,974
This is a pot... This is
a pot cookie, isn't it?

1138
00:55:49,975 --> 00:55:51,309
- It's a pot cookie.
- No, no, no.

1139
00:55:51,310 --> 00:55:52,435
No. I don't do well
with that stuff at all.

1140
00:55:52,436 --> 00:55:53,520
It's a pot cookie.

1141
00:55:53,521 --> 00:55:55,313
Yeah, I know. No, thank you.

1142
00:55:55,314 --> 00:55:56,564
Just have a little bit with me.

1143
00:55:56,565 --> 00:55:59,401
My worst fear is to OD
on a recreational drug.

1144
00:55:59,402 --> 00:56:00,860
- (STAMMERS) No, thank you.
- On a pot cookie?

1145
00:56:00,861 --> 00:56:02,487
The last time somebody
gave me one of these

1146
00:56:02,488 --> 00:56:04,948
I became convinced that prairie
dogs could read my mind.

1147
00:56:04,949 --> 00:56:06,866
Just take a little bit.

1148
00:56:06,867 --> 00:56:08,702
- I'll take a very, very small bite.
- Just a small bite.

1149
00:56:08,703 --> 00:56:11,905
- A very small bite.
- That's it.

1150
00:56:13,249 --> 00:56:14,541
Are you kidding me?

1151
00:56:14,542 --> 00:56:16,126
Nope. Deadly serious.

1152
00:56:16,127 --> 00:56:17,794
- (LAUGHING)
- Let's see what this does

1153
00:56:17,795 --> 00:56:19,337
and if I don't throw
myself off this cliff

1154
00:56:19,338 --> 00:56:20,839
during some awful
freak-out, then...

1155
00:56:20,840 --> 00:56:22,507
Just take that little
bit, right there.

1156
00:56:22,508 --> 00:56:24,551
- Well, now you've touched it.
- (LAUGHING)

1157
00:56:24,552 --> 00:56:28,888
Take the other side. There you go.

1158
00:56:28,889 --> 00:56:31,141
There.

1159
00:56:31,142 --> 00:56:34,886
And now, we just wait
for the sun to set.

1160
00:56:45,698 --> 00:56:48,491
This is really weird.

1161
00:56:48,492 --> 00:56:51,694
- Is it supposed to be like this?
- (CHUCKLING)

1162
00:56:53,247 --> 00:56:54,456
You gave me the right
amount, right?

1163
00:56:54,457 --> 00:56:58,284
You don't think I took too much?

1164
00:56:59,462 --> 00:57:01,921
- Just ride it out.
- This is...

1165
00:57:01,922 --> 00:57:04,299
Wow, my bones are in
really deep today.

1166
00:57:04,300 --> 00:57:07,635
Like, there's a lot more
skin than there usually is.

1167
00:57:07,636 --> 00:57:09,679
I think my body is padding
up for the winter,

1168
00:57:09,680 --> 00:57:11,139
which is weird, because
it's not winter.

1169
00:57:11,140 --> 00:57:12,390
But there's a lot more there.

1170
00:57:12,391 --> 00:57:13,892
(ANNA LAUGHING)

1171
00:57:13,893 --> 00:57:16,094
Oh...

1172
00:57:16,520 --> 00:57:18,063
(SWALLOWING)

1173
00:57:18,064 --> 00:57:20,815
There's something wrong
with my swallowing.

1174
00:57:20,816 --> 00:57:22,484
This is not how I usually swallow.

1175
00:57:22,485 --> 00:57:23,610
(SQUEAKING)

1176
00:57:23,611 --> 00:57:24,778
Oh, my God, Anna, he knows.

1177
00:57:24,779 --> 00:57:25,862
What, what, what?

1178
00:57:25,863 --> 00:57:27,947
He knows what we're doing,
he knows what this is.

1179
00:57:27,948 --> 00:57:29,324
He knows what this is.

1180
00:57:29,325 --> 00:57:32,285
I don't wanna... No,
I don't wanna join.

1181
00:57:32,286 --> 00:57:35,738
I don't wanna join up.

1182
00:57:50,721 --> 00:57:52,847
Suppertime, you lazy prick.

1183
00:57:52,848 --> 00:57:55,466
(SNORING)

1184
00:57:57,228 --> 00:57:59,854
Goddamn waste of lungs.

1185
00:57:59,855 --> 00:58:02,056
(GRUNTING)

1186
00:58:07,238 --> 00:58:10,273
Who's lazy now, Sheriff?

1187
00:58:12,952 --> 00:58:14,703
(CHUCKLES)

1188
00:58:14,704 --> 00:58:17,405
(FOLK MUSIC PLAYING)

1189
00:58:23,129 --> 00:58:25,747
(CROWD CHEERING)

1190
00:58:41,772 --> 00:58:44,432
(WHOOPING)

1191
00:58:55,453 --> 00:58:57,654
Hey.

1192
00:59:01,917 --> 00:59:03,418
Wow.

1193
00:59:03,419 --> 00:59:05,628
You look amazing.

1194
00:59:05,629 --> 00:59:07,630
And maybe a little uncomfortable.

1195
00:59:07,631 --> 00:59:09,758
Oh, shit!

1196
00:59:09,759 --> 00:59:11,593
I'm totally overdressed, aren't I?

1197
00:59:11,594 --> 00:59:12,927
No.

1198
00:59:12,928 --> 00:59:14,971
I've never done formal before.

1199
00:59:14,972 --> 00:59:17,307
And the lady at the boutique
told me to buy this

1200
00:59:17,308 --> 00:59:18,725
and no one else is wearing this.

1201
00:59:18,726 --> 00:59:20,143
(STAMMERS) Who cares what...

1202
00:59:20,144 --> 00:59:22,937
These are all fuckers.
You look fantastic.

1203
00:59:22,938 --> 00:59:25,315
I look like Jane Austen
threw up all over me.

1204
00:59:25,316 --> 00:59:27,984
(LAUGHING) You do not look
like Jane Austen threw...

1205
00:59:27,985 --> 00:59:30,362
No, you look absolutely beautiful.

1206
00:59:30,363 --> 00:59:31,738
You can breathe in
that thing, right?

1207
00:59:31,739 --> 00:59:32,906
There's nothing I like more than

1208
00:59:32,907 --> 00:59:34,657
putting on some
loose, baggy clothes,

1209
00:59:34,658 --> 00:59:36,409
and just being able to relax.

1210
00:59:36,410 --> 00:59:38,912
Yeah, this is an end-of-the-workday
outfit you have on.

1211
00:59:38,913 --> 00:59:41,581
I'm very glad I
remembered the six items

1212
00:59:41,582 --> 00:59:43,333
I somehow require to
hold up my pants.

1213
00:59:43,334 --> 00:59:44,376
Oh, yeah.

1214
00:59:44,377 --> 00:59:45,585
I like your bustle, by the way.

1215
00:59:45,586 --> 00:59:46,753
Oh, yeah.

1216
00:59:46,754 --> 00:59:49,756
I really love that the most
alluring fashion statement

1217
00:59:49,757 --> 00:59:51,174
a woman can make today

1218
00:59:51,175 --> 00:59:52,509
is to simulate a fat ass.

1219
00:59:52,510 --> 00:59:54,844
- That is a simulation of a fat ass, right there.
- Thank you.

1220
00:59:54,845 --> 00:59:58,348
If I was a black guy, this is the
meanest trick you could play on me.

1221
00:59:58,349 --> 01:00:00,809
Because I'd be like,
"Oh, my God! Look.

1222
01:00:00,810 --> 01:00:02,394
"There's a fat ass, my favorite."

1223
01:00:02,395 --> 01:00:05,021
And then I'd lift it up and I'd be
like, "Oh, shit, it's a big joke."

1224
01:00:05,022 --> 01:00:07,232
I know, exactly, because
when you lift it up

1225
01:00:07,233 --> 01:00:09,442
there's nothing but a
metal cage under there.

1226
01:00:09,443 --> 01:00:11,695
ALBERT: Wow!

1227
01:00:11,696 --> 01:00:14,364
You are ready to relieve
the stress of the day.

1228
01:00:14,365 --> 01:00:17,275
Completely.

1229
01:00:17,868 --> 01:00:20,320
(SIGHS)

1230
01:00:20,413 --> 01:00:23,248
Well, at the very least,
this will be a good way

1231
01:00:23,249 --> 01:00:25,458
to spend my last
night alive, right?

1232
01:00:25,459 --> 01:00:26,626
Albert.

1233
01:00:26,627 --> 01:00:28,253
What?

1234
01:00:28,254 --> 01:00:30,830
Do you trust me?

1235
01:00:31,924 --> 01:00:33,925
Yeah, I do.

1236
01:00:33,926 --> 01:00:36,970
Good. You're gonna be fine.

1237
01:00:36,971 --> 01:00:38,722
If I thought you were
gonna lose this gunfight,

1238
01:00:38,723 --> 01:00:42,634
I'd make you call it off. Okay?

1239
01:00:43,519 --> 01:00:44,978
(SIGHS)

1240
01:00:44,979 --> 01:00:47,430
Yeah, okay.

1241
01:00:47,440 --> 01:00:49,766
Trust me.

1242
01:00:50,901 --> 01:00:53,236
(CROWD CHEERING)

1243
01:00:53,237 --> 01:00:57,073
Hey, how about it
for the James Gang?

1244
01:00:57,074 --> 01:01:00,618
Thank you. Hey, hey, it's great
to be back here in Old Stump.

1245
01:01:00,619 --> 01:01:03,079
Any Indians here tonight?
How'd you get tickets?

1246
01:01:03,080 --> 01:01:05,990
Let me guess. Scalpers.

1247
01:01:07,752 --> 01:01:11,129
But I tell ya, folks, this telegraph
machine... That thing is nuts.

1248
01:01:11,130 --> 01:01:14,090
I mean, sure, it's faster
than the Pony Express,

1249
01:01:14,091 --> 01:01:16,676
but what good is it if you can't
send a picture of your dick?

1250
01:01:16,677 --> 01:01:18,094
(CROWD LAUGHING)

1251
01:01:18,095 --> 01:01:19,763
Okay, they're giving
me the lantern.

1252
01:01:19,764 --> 01:01:22,432
Enjoy the bison and I hope
you're enjoying your drinks

1253
01:01:22,433 --> 01:01:25,935
as much as my horse enjoyed
making them for you.

1254
01:01:25,936 --> 01:01:30,306
Now, let's all line up for
the sweetheart dance.

1255
01:01:30,775 --> 01:01:32,442
Come on, let's go.

1256
01:01:32,443 --> 01:01:34,110
No, no, no! I suck at dancing.

1257
01:01:34,111 --> 01:01:35,278
No one will notice.

1258
01:01:35,279 --> 01:01:36,363
How will they not notice?

1259
01:01:36,364 --> 01:01:38,690
Because you suck at everything.

1260
01:01:38,741 --> 01:01:40,116
Well, well!

1261
01:01:40,117 --> 01:01:42,786
Hello, there, sheepie.

1262
01:01:42,787 --> 01:01:45,372
Hello, Foy. Hey, Louise.

1263
01:01:45,373 --> 01:01:46,498
Hey, Albert.

1264
01:01:46,499 --> 01:01:48,833
So, big day tomorrow.

1265
01:01:48,834 --> 01:01:51,503
Care for a last dance?

1266
01:01:51,504 --> 01:01:52,962
With you?

1267
01:01:52,963 --> 01:01:54,547
No, not with me.

1268
01:01:54,548 --> 01:01:55,715
- I mean, the dance.
- Oh!

1269
01:01:55,716 --> 01:01:57,967
Yeah. No, yeah, no.
She and I are gonna dance.

1270
01:01:57,968 --> 01:02:00,470
And now, to serenade us
for the sweetheart dance,

1271
01:02:00,471 --> 01:02:04,132
our very own Marcus Thornton!

1272
01:02:04,642 --> 01:02:07,010
Shit crowd.

1273
01:02:10,147 --> 01:02:12,348
(INAUDIBLE)

1274
01:02:14,443 --> 01:02:17,987
(SIGHS) Ready for weird, stiff,
traditional frontier dancing?

1275
01:02:17,988 --> 01:02:19,072
Fuck, yes.

1276
01:02:19,073 --> 01:02:21,858
(FOLK MUSIC PLAYING)

1277
01:02:22,493 --> 01:02:24,452
<i>You men who long for love</i>

1278
01:02:24,453 --> 01:02:26,204
<i>You mustn't all despair</i>

1279
01:02:26,205 --> 01:02:28,665
<i>There's a secret you should know</i>

1280
01:02:28,666 --> 01:02:30,375
<i>To capture the hearts of the fair</i>

1281
01:02:30,376 --> 01:02:34,295
<i>You may not have the looks
You may not have the dash</i>

1282
01:02:34,296 --> 01:02:36,214
<i>But you'll win yourself a girl</i>

1283
01:02:36,215 --> 01:02:38,008
<i>If you've only got a moustache</i>

1284
01:02:38,009 --> 01:02:40,135
<i>A moustache
A moustache</i>

1285
01:02:40,136 --> 01:02:43,546
<i>If you've only got a moustache</i>

1286
01:02:45,766 --> 01:02:48,059
<i>You may be common folk</i>

1287
01:02:48,060 --> 01:02:49,894
<i>Without a hint of pride</i>

1288
01:02:49,895 --> 01:02:51,896
<i>But you needn't be a king</i>

1289
01:02:51,897 --> 01:02:53,898
<i>To make any maiden a bride</i>

1290
01:02:53,899 --> 01:02:58,069
<i>You may not have the name
You may not have the cash</i>

1291
01:02:58,070 --> 01:02:59,696
<i>But you'll make that girl your own</i>

1292
01:02:59,697 --> 01:03:01,489
<i>If you've only got a moustache</i>

1293
01:03:01,490 --> 01:03:02,574
<i>A moustache</i>

1294
01:03:02,575 --> 01:03:06,486
<i>A moustache
If you've only got a moustache</i>

1295
01:03:09,749 --> 01:03:11,541
<i>You may be big and fat</i>

1296
01:03:11,542 --> 01:03:13,376
<i>Or uglier than sin</i>

1297
01:03:13,377 --> 01:03:15,837
<i>All the ladies shut you out</i>

1298
01:03:15,838 --> 01:03:17,756
<i>You're wondering how to get in</i>

1299
01:03:17,757 --> 01:03:21,176
<i>Well, here is my advice
For how to make a splash</i>

1300
01:03:21,177 --> 01:03:23,219
<i>You can have your pick of gals</i>

1301
01:03:23,220 --> 01:03:25,096
<i>If you've only got a moustache</i>

1302
01:03:25,097 --> 01:03:26,931
<i>A moustache
A moustache</i>

1303
01:03:26,932 --> 01:03:28,933
<i>If you've only got a moustache</i>

1304
01:03:28,934 --> 01:03:32,228
<i>A moustache, a moustache,
a moustache</i>

1305
01:03:32,229 --> 01:03:34,022
<i>Big moustache, thick moustache</i>

1306
01:03:34,023 --> 01:03:35,774
<i>My moustache, your moustache</i>

1307
01:03:35,775 --> 01:03:37,859
<i>Say the word, the word "moustache"</i>

1308
01:03:37,860 --> 01:03:39,736
<i>A moustache, a moustache</i>

1309
01:03:39,737 --> 01:03:41,488
<i>Now we both have said "moustache"</i>

1310
01:03:41,489 --> 01:03:42,739
<i>A moustache</i>

1311
01:03:42,740 --> 01:03:46,242
<i>A moustache
If you've only got a moustache</i>

1312
01:03:46,243 --> 01:03:48,695
(CROWD CHEERING)

1313
01:03:53,292 --> 01:03:55,585
Fucking asshole.

1314
01:03:55,586 --> 01:03:58,588
How about I steal a bottle of
whiskey and we get out of here?

1315
01:03:58,589 --> 01:03:59,756
Love that idea.

1316
01:03:59,757 --> 01:04:02,250
I'll be right back.

1317
01:04:02,468 --> 01:04:05,295
Your dick's out.

1318
01:04:17,274 --> 01:04:18,483
(TALKING INDISTINCTLY)

1319
01:04:18,484 --> 01:04:19,943
(LAUGHING)

1320
01:04:19,944 --> 01:04:21,945
Hey.

1321
01:04:21,946 --> 01:04:24,406
So, Albert and I are gonna split,

1322
01:04:24,407 --> 01:04:27,450
but I just wanted to come by
and wish you luck tomorrow.

1323
01:04:27,451 --> 01:04:29,986
Thank you.

1324
01:04:30,496 --> 01:04:31,955
So, I guess it's kind of weird

1325
01:04:31,956 --> 01:04:33,331
knowing that a woman
can outshoot you, huh?

1326
01:04:33,332 --> 01:04:34,416
If you don't mind,

1327
01:04:34,417 --> 01:04:36,251
my girlfriend and I are
enjoying each other's company.

1328
01:04:36,252 --> 01:04:38,786
Want to know the
real kicker, though?

1329
01:04:39,505 --> 01:04:42,290
I can outdrink you, too.

1330
01:04:42,466 --> 01:04:47,795
That, I can assure
you, is impossible.

1331
01:04:48,305 --> 01:04:51,507
Fifty cents to the winner.

1332
01:04:52,977 --> 01:04:54,644
One,

1333
01:04:54,645 --> 01:04:56,438
two,

1334
01:04:56,439 --> 01:04:58,640
three.

1335
01:05:01,485 --> 01:05:02,861
(GRUNTS)

1336
01:05:02,862 --> 01:05:04,154
Oh, shit!

1337
01:05:04,155 --> 01:05:05,238
Don't feel bad.

1338
01:05:05,239 --> 01:05:09,451
Alcohol doesn't harmonize well with a
woman's frail constitution, anyway.

1339
01:05:09,452 --> 01:05:10,785
I guess not.

1340
01:05:10,786 --> 01:05:12,120
Here you go.

1341
01:05:12,121 --> 01:05:14,456
You can buy your
girlfriend a brain.

1342
01:05:14,457 --> 01:05:15,874
Excuse me?

1343
01:05:15,875 --> 01:05:17,625
You're an idiot.

1344
01:05:17,626 --> 01:05:20,712
You have the nicest guy in the world
throwing himself at your feet

1345
01:05:20,713 --> 01:05:23,173
and here you are with
this complete asshole.

1346
01:05:23,174 --> 01:05:25,717
Who I go out with
is my own business.

1347
01:05:25,718 --> 01:05:28,928
So, why don't you
mind your own, bitch?

1348
01:05:28,929 --> 01:05:33,341
How are you so blind
with eyes that big?

1349
01:05:34,518 --> 01:05:36,936
Enjoy your night.

1350
01:05:36,937 --> 01:05:39,064
- (HUFFS)
- They're not that big.

1351
01:05:39,065 --> 01:05:41,691
No, my dear, they're
practically Chinese.

1352
01:05:41,692 --> 01:05:42,859
God, I love you.

1353
01:05:42,860 --> 01:05:45,436
- I love you, too.
- (MOANING)

1354
01:05:50,534 --> 01:05:52,827
How's that?

1355
01:05:52,828 --> 01:05:54,371
Ooh. (COUGHING)

1356
01:05:54,372 --> 01:05:55,580
- Wow.
- (INHALES SHARPLY)

1357
01:05:55,581 --> 01:05:57,374
- Um...
- It'll keep us warm, though.

1358
01:05:57,375 --> 01:05:58,541
Are you cold?

1359
01:05:58,542 --> 01:05:59,668
A little.

1360
01:05:59,669 --> 01:06:00,710
Here, take...

1361
01:06:00,711 --> 01:06:02,587
- No, no, no! It's okay.
- No, it's fine. Here.

1362
01:06:02,588 --> 01:06:07,425
This has been in my family
for 97 generations.

1363
01:06:07,426 --> 01:06:08,551
(SIGHS)

1364
01:06:08,552 --> 01:06:11,012
I can't get that goddamn
moustache song out of my head.

1365
01:06:11,013 --> 01:06:12,597
Oh, just think of another song.

1366
01:06:12,598 --> 01:06:14,724
I can't. There's only,
like, three songs.

1367
01:06:14,725 --> 01:06:17,018
Oh, that's true. And they're
all by Stephen Foster.

1368
01:06:17,019 --> 01:06:19,187
Yeah.

1369
01:06:19,188 --> 01:06:20,730
Mmm.

1370
01:06:20,731 --> 01:06:23,233
(SIGHS) Um...

1371
01:06:23,234 --> 01:06:24,943
Hey, you know, whatever
happens tomorrow,

1372
01:06:24,944 --> 01:06:29,114
I just... I just want
to say thank you.

1373
01:06:29,115 --> 01:06:30,407
Uh...

1374
01:06:30,408 --> 01:06:34,744
I couldn't have gotten
this far without you.

1375
01:06:34,745 --> 01:06:39,749
And this may be the booze talking,
or your pep talk, or both,

1376
01:06:39,750 --> 01:06:42,085
but I think I can do it.

1377
01:06:42,086 --> 01:06:44,087
You know, I think I can beat him.

1378
01:06:44,088 --> 01:06:46,214
Well, I'll tell you this, you
sound a lot more confident

1379
01:06:46,215 --> 01:06:50,293
than that guy who dragged me out
of the saloon not too long ago.

1380
01:06:50,386 --> 01:06:51,428
You know, it's funny.

1381
01:06:51,429 --> 01:06:53,430
I still feel like I don't know

1382
01:06:53,431 --> 01:06:56,516
anything about you
after all this time.

1383
01:06:56,517 --> 01:07:01,804
And I feel like every time I bring
it up, you change the subject.

1384
01:07:01,939 --> 01:07:04,399
There really isn't
that much to tell.

1385
01:07:04,400 --> 01:07:07,986
My story is a lot like
yours, I suppose.

1386
01:07:07,987 --> 01:07:11,656
Because I'll tell you, I hate the
West just as much as you do.

1387
01:07:11,657 --> 01:07:12,782
Do you really?

1388
01:07:12,783 --> 01:07:14,325
For my own reasons, but, yeah.

1389
01:07:14,326 --> 01:07:16,786
Oh, I like you even more now.

1390
01:07:16,787 --> 01:07:19,456
There is something about
connecting over mutual hatred

1391
01:07:19,457 --> 01:07:21,291
that's just so much
deeper than mutual love.

1392
01:07:21,292 --> 01:07:22,417
It's true, right?

1393
01:07:22,418 --> 01:07:25,253
If two people hate the same
things, it creates a bond.

1394
01:07:25,254 --> 01:07:26,463
Hate can move mountains.

1395
01:07:26,464 --> 01:07:27,630
(LAUGHING) Yes.

1396
01:07:27,631 --> 01:07:29,466
Oh, hey, you know what?
Before I forget.

1397
01:07:29,467 --> 01:07:31,301
Hey, Bridget, Bridget.

1398
01:07:31,302 --> 01:07:33,178
- Yeah, she knows. Come here. There we go.
- (ANNA LAUGHING)

1399
01:07:33,179 --> 01:07:34,846
ANNA: Oh, my God.

1400
01:07:34,847 --> 01:07:36,598
What is this?

1401
01:07:36,599 --> 01:07:40,268
This is just a little
something to say thank you.

1402
01:07:40,269 --> 01:07:41,353
Albert.

1403
01:07:41,354 --> 01:07:45,473
It's nothing huge, it's just...

1404
01:07:46,359 --> 01:07:47,650
Okay, don't get too excited.

1405
01:07:47,651 --> 01:07:50,019
What is it? What is it? What is it?

1406
01:07:51,655 --> 01:07:52,989
Holy shit.

1407
01:07:52,990 --> 01:07:54,366
ALBERT: (LAUGHING) I know, right?

1408
01:07:54,367 --> 01:07:55,658
- He's smiling.
- Yeah.

1409
01:07:55,659 --> 01:07:57,035
No, in the picture, he's smiling!

1410
01:07:57,036 --> 01:07:58,119
ALBERT: Isn't that amazing?

1411
01:07:58,120 --> 01:08:00,246
I bought that off a peddler who was
coming through town last week.

1412
01:08:00,247 --> 01:08:02,248
- This is the guy I was telling you about.
- Uh-huh.

1413
01:08:02,249 --> 01:08:03,500
I didn't even know this existed.

1414
01:08:03,501 --> 01:08:05,794
- And apparently, he's not insane.
- Bullshit!

1415
01:08:05,795 --> 01:08:06,961
That's what the guy told me.

1416
01:08:06,962 --> 01:08:09,172
It takes 30 seconds
to take a photograph.

1417
01:08:09,173 --> 01:08:10,590
This guy would have
had to sit there

1418
01:08:10,591 --> 01:08:12,384
and smile for 30 sustained seconds.

1419
01:08:12,385 --> 01:08:14,928
I know. I've never been happy for
30 seconds in a row in my life.

1420
01:08:14,929 --> 01:08:17,347
No one has. It's the fucking West!

1421
01:08:17,348 --> 01:08:18,807
He's gotta be insane!

1422
01:08:18,808 --> 01:08:21,551
Who the fuck knows?

1423
01:08:24,772 --> 01:08:27,190
This is incredibly sweet.

1424
01:08:27,191 --> 01:08:30,360
(STAMMERING) It's nothing. It's...

1425
01:08:30,361 --> 01:08:33,062
I owe you.

1426
01:08:33,447 --> 01:08:37,150
No one's ever done
anything like this for me.

1427
01:08:37,326 --> 01:08:39,285
Oh, come on, now. (CHUCKLES)

1428
01:08:39,286 --> 01:08:42,071
Thank you.

1429
01:09:11,277 --> 01:09:13,820
Uh...

1430
01:09:13,821 --> 01:09:15,739
I'm sorry.

1431
01:09:15,740 --> 01:09:18,942
I... I shouldn't have done that.

1432
01:09:20,036 --> 01:09:23,913
No, it's... It's fine.

1433
01:09:23,914 --> 01:09:25,749
You...

1434
01:09:25,750 --> 01:09:30,578
You've just been a really good
friend to me. That's all.

1435
01:09:33,382 --> 01:09:37,252
Yeah. I, um...

1436
01:09:38,262 --> 01:09:39,846
It's late.

1437
01:09:39,847 --> 01:09:42,599
Yeah, I should take you home.

1438
01:09:42,600 --> 01:09:45,134
(CHUCKLES)

1439
01:10:04,955 --> 01:10:07,448
- (GRUNTS)
- (CHUCKLES)

1440
01:10:21,263 --> 01:10:23,640
Oh, thanks.

1441
01:10:23,641 --> 01:10:27,310
Good luck tomorrow.
I'm gonna be there.

1442
01:10:27,311 --> 01:10:30,013
Good. (CHUCKLES)

1443
01:10:30,398 --> 01:10:32,724
Okay.

1444
01:10:58,175 --> 01:10:59,926
Um... (CLEARS THROAT)

1445
01:10:59,927 --> 01:11:01,970
(CHUCKLES) Good night.

1446
01:11:01,971 --> 01:11:04,339
Good night.

1447
01:11:33,461 --> 01:11:35,662
(HORSE NEIGHS)

1448
01:11:50,227 --> 01:11:52,679
(CRACKLING)

1449
01:12:02,198 --> 01:12:04,440
Hello?

1450
01:12:04,617 --> 01:12:07,151
(EXCLAIMS)

1451
01:12:09,497 --> 01:12:11,915
What, uh... What's that?

1452
01:12:11,916 --> 01:12:14,951
Nothing. (STUTTERING)

1453
01:12:14,960 --> 01:12:18,088
It's a weather experiment.

1454
01:12:18,089 --> 01:12:20,373
Oh.

1455
01:12:22,259 --> 01:12:25,211
Great Scott!

1456
01:12:29,767 --> 01:12:31,518
Are you sure you can't call it off?

1457
01:12:31,519 --> 01:12:34,354
Of course not. I'd
be branded a coward.

1458
01:12:34,355 --> 01:12:37,399
Baby, if you fight him
tomorrow, you will kill him.

1459
01:12:37,400 --> 01:12:39,984
Yes, that's what
happens in a gunfight.

1460
01:12:39,985 --> 01:12:42,529
But he's not a bad guy, Foy.

1461
01:12:42,530 --> 01:12:44,406
I mean, yeah, he's kind of a loser

1462
01:12:44,407 --> 01:12:46,408
and he always smells like sheep,

1463
01:12:46,409 --> 01:12:47,617
but he doesn't deserve to be shot.

1464
01:12:47,618 --> 01:12:48,993
Louise!

1465
01:12:48,994 --> 01:12:51,329
My decision is final.

1466
01:12:51,330 --> 01:12:52,831
Now, do it.

1467
01:12:52,832 --> 01:12:54,082
Hey, I'm really tired.

1468
01:12:54,083 --> 01:12:56,784
Louise!

1469
01:13:03,718 --> 01:13:06,294
(MOANING)

1470
01:13:08,889 --> 01:13:12,267
My social stature is significant.

1471
01:13:12,268 --> 01:13:14,853
I'm an important man.

1472
01:13:14,854 --> 01:13:16,938
I have my own business.

1473
01:13:16,939 --> 01:13:19,482
People envy me.

1474
01:13:19,483 --> 01:13:21,401
(STOMACH RUMBLING)

1475
01:13:21,402 --> 01:13:23,486
Ooh...

1476
01:13:23,487 --> 01:13:25,855
- What's wrong?
- (GROANS)

1477
01:13:26,032 --> 01:13:29,275
- Foy!
- Not now!

1478
01:13:53,517 --> 01:13:55,969
(KNOCK ON DOOR)

1479
01:14:07,615 --> 01:14:10,984
Hello, sweetheart.

1480
01:14:30,054 --> 01:14:32,589
(MOUTHING) Where's Anna?

1481
01:14:52,535 --> 01:14:55,486
(STOMACH RUMBLING)

1482
01:15:06,257 --> 01:15:08,458
(SIGHS)

1483
01:15:08,509 --> 01:15:10,793
Well, now,

1484
01:15:10,928 --> 01:15:14,431
I didn't think you'd show, sheepie.

1485
01:15:14,432 --> 01:15:17,800
Yeah, listen, Foy...

1486
01:15:22,606 --> 01:15:24,807
Oh...

1487
01:15:25,026 --> 01:15:27,610
Oh. Oh...

1488
01:15:27,611 --> 01:15:29,612
(FARTING)

1489
01:15:29,613 --> 01:15:31,940
(GASPING)

1490
01:15:32,408 --> 01:15:34,776
(FARTING)

1491
01:15:40,332 --> 01:15:43,618
(SIGHING)

1492
01:15:45,463 --> 01:15:47,664
(FARTS)

1493
01:16:06,817 --> 01:16:08,485
(FARTS)

1494
01:16:08,486 --> 01:16:11,020
(SIGHS DEEPLY)

1495
01:16:11,822 --> 01:16:14,357
(STRAINING)

1496
01:16:32,134 --> 01:16:34,844
Holy shit. You all... You all done?

1497
01:16:34,845 --> 01:16:36,721
I'm good.

1498
01:16:36,722 --> 01:16:38,965
Okay.

1499
01:16:40,017 --> 01:16:42,886
Listen, Foy,

1500
01:16:46,524 --> 01:16:49,350
she's all yours.

1501
01:16:50,111 --> 01:16:51,194
(SIGHS)

1502
01:16:51,195 --> 01:16:53,571
Louise,

1503
01:16:53,572 --> 01:16:55,573
you know, I really
do care about you.

1504
01:16:55,574 --> 01:16:58,868
But, I don't know,
somewhere along the line

1505
01:16:58,869 --> 01:17:04,407
I guess I just forgot that a
relationship is a two-way street.

1506
01:17:04,625 --> 01:17:07,752
And I've been reminded recently

1507
01:17:07,753 --> 01:17:11,831
of what it's like to have
somebody care about me.

1508
01:17:12,091 --> 01:17:14,584
And I like it.

1509
01:17:14,677 --> 01:17:18,847
So, if you want to spend the rest of
your life with a pussy full of hair,

1510
01:17:18,848 --> 01:17:23,384
I say, go with God and
best of luck to you.

1511
01:17:28,733 --> 01:17:31,109
You know, I just realized that last
joke might not have been clear.

1512
01:17:31,110 --> 01:17:33,570
I didn't mean that she
has a hairy pussy.

1513
01:17:33,571 --> 01:17:36,865
I meant that Foy has a moustache,

1514
01:17:36,866 --> 01:17:41,494
so, you know, he gets hair in her

1515
01:17:41,495 --> 01:17:46,157
when he goes down there.

1516
01:17:46,751 --> 01:17:49,911
Yeah. (IMITATING GUNFIRE)

1517
01:17:53,341 --> 01:17:55,792
I got it.

1518
01:18:07,980 --> 01:18:10,682
Anna?

1519
01:18:22,828 --> 01:18:26,155
- Coward.
- Thank you.

1520
01:18:26,415 --> 01:18:28,166
She's not there.

1521
01:18:28,167 --> 01:18:30,460
- Well, I'm sure she's okay.
- I don't understand.

1522
01:18:30,461 --> 01:18:32,128
We've been prepping for
this gunfight for a week.

1523
01:18:32,129 --> 01:18:33,421
She wouldn't just not show up.

1524
01:18:33,422 --> 01:18:36,508
Hey, do you... Do you think
you guys are gonna have sex?

1525
01:18:36,509 --> 01:18:37,634
Uh...

1526
01:18:37,635 --> 01:18:39,636
Maybe, at some point. I don't know.

1527
01:18:39,637 --> 01:18:41,179
Well, when you do, let us know

1528
01:18:41,180 --> 01:18:43,515
because maybe we can make
it an all-us-friends thing.

1529
01:18:43,516 --> 01:18:45,684
You know, we can all get in
sync together, sexually.

1530
01:18:45,685 --> 01:18:48,436
- Edward, we are not having sex.
- Sorry.

1531
01:18:48,437 --> 01:18:49,813
Ruth! Let's fuck!

1532
01:18:49,814 --> 01:18:51,981
Coming!

1533
01:18:51,982 --> 01:18:55,393
(CHUCKLING)
She keeps my head on straight.

1534
01:19:12,545 --> 01:19:14,462
(WHISPERING) Clinch Leatherwood.

1535
01:19:14,463 --> 01:19:15,547
Great.

1536
01:19:15,548 --> 01:19:17,841
Look at this. Another
thing that can kill us.

1537
01:19:17,842 --> 01:19:20,135
We should all just wear
coffins as clothes.

1538
01:19:20,136 --> 01:19:21,678
Shh.

1539
01:19:21,679 --> 01:19:27,050
Somebody in this wee shithole
of a town is going to die.

1540
01:19:27,309 --> 01:19:33,064
One of my boys saw a man
kissing my wife last night.

1541
01:19:33,065 --> 01:19:35,025
I want to know who it was.

1542
01:19:35,026 --> 01:19:36,693
Oh, man!

1543
01:19:36,694 --> 01:19:40,155
Somebody's gonna get fucked up.

1544
01:19:40,156 --> 01:19:42,866
Now, you all seem like good folk.

1545
01:19:42,867 --> 01:19:47,528
And good folk know better than
to take what isn't theirs.

1546
01:19:47,830 --> 01:19:50,698
And this... (WHISTLES)

1547
01:19:58,924 --> 01:20:01,751
This is mine.

1548
01:20:03,262 --> 01:20:06,556
So, I'm going to ask one more time.

1549
01:20:06,557 --> 01:20:09,467
Who was it?

1550
01:20:09,894 --> 01:20:12,303
Mmm?

1551
01:20:14,523 --> 01:20:16,891
Who?

1552
01:20:19,278 --> 01:20:21,646
(CROWD GASPS)

1553
01:20:23,866 --> 01:20:26,242
Now, you make sure he
gets this message.

1554
01:20:26,243 --> 01:20:31,081
Either he meets me outside in the
main thoroughfare at noon tomorrow

1555
01:20:31,082 --> 01:20:33,416
or I start killing more people.

1556
01:20:33,417 --> 01:20:35,952
All right? (SCOFFS)

1557
01:20:42,760 --> 01:20:45,628
Albert, you gotta get out of here.

1558
01:21:04,156 --> 01:21:06,116
(HORSE NEIGHS)

1559
01:21:06,117 --> 01:21:07,784
(HUFFS)

1560
01:21:07,785 --> 01:21:12,414
Boys, there's an abandoned sod
house back around that bend.

1561
01:21:12,415 --> 01:21:13,957
We'll stash the gold there.

1562
01:21:13,958 --> 01:21:16,167
Ben, you take the men
and set up camp.

1563
01:21:16,168 --> 01:21:18,712
I need some alone
time with my wife.

1564
01:21:18,713 --> 01:21:19,796
Got it, Clinch.

1565
01:21:19,797 --> 01:21:21,965
Let's go, boys. Come on!

1566
01:21:21,966 --> 01:21:24,834
Go on, get down.

1567
01:21:28,764 --> 01:21:29,848
(GROANS)

1568
01:21:29,849 --> 01:21:31,641
Who was it?

1569
01:21:31,642 --> 01:21:33,184
Huh?

1570
01:21:33,185 --> 01:21:34,978
Mark Twain.

1571
01:21:34,979 --> 01:21:36,771
What? Is it?

1572
01:21:36,772 --> 01:21:39,983
Jesus. How fucking stupid are you?

1573
01:21:39,984 --> 01:21:41,151
Whoa! Whoa! Whoa!

1574
01:21:41,152 --> 01:21:42,444
Who?

1575
01:21:42,445 --> 01:21:43,945
(EXHALING)

1576
01:21:43,946 --> 01:21:46,114
I'm not gonna ask you again. Who?

1577
01:21:46,115 --> 01:21:50,368
Okay, it's... It's Sheriff Brady.
But please, please, please.

1578
01:21:50,369 --> 01:21:53,621
I'm begging you.
Don't hurt him, okay?

1579
01:21:53,622 --> 01:21:55,457
After all the lovely years
we've been together

1580
01:21:55,458 --> 01:21:57,334
you think I don't know
when you're lying?

1581
01:21:57,335 --> 01:22:00,036
- I'm not.
- (BARKING)

1582
01:22:02,006 --> 01:22:04,707
Plugger.

1583
01:22:05,801 --> 01:22:09,554
Tell me who it is or Plugger gets
plugged between his pretty eyes.

1584
01:22:09,555 --> 01:22:12,757
- Come on, Clinch.
- You think I'm joking?

1585
01:22:12,892 --> 01:22:15,101
Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Okay, okay, okay.

1586
01:22:15,102 --> 01:22:16,311
Who?

1587
01:22:16,312 --> 01:22:18,721
(SIGHS)

1588
01:22:20,483 --> 01:22:22,692
It's Albert Stark.

1589
01:22:22,693 --> 01:22:25,645
Albert Stark.

1590
01:22:25,696 --> 01:22:28,565
That's better.

1591
01:22:31,077 --> 01:22:33,244
I've been keeping it nice and soft.

1592
01:22:33,245 --> 01:22:35,738
See?

1593
01:22:39,251 --> 01:22:42,045
(MOANING)

1594
01:22:42,046 --> 01:22:43,129
Mmm!

1595
01:22:43,130 --> 01:22:47,050
I've missed you, baby.
Oh, I've missed you a lot.

1596
01:22:47,051 --> 01:22:48,218
(COUGHS)

1597
01:22:48,219 --> 01:22:52,347
The longer the ride,
the lonelier a man gets.

1598
01:22:52,348 --> 01:22:55,016
And he needs the comforting touch

1599
01:22:55,017 --> 01:22:59,229
of the woman he loves to
soothe his tired bones.

1600
01:22:59,230 --> 01:23:01,231
And now, I'm here,

1601
01:23:01,232 --> 01:23:02,899
you're here,

1602
01:23:02,900 --> 01:23:05,860
and we have time to
be husband and wife.

1603
01:23:05,861 --> 01:23:07,070
The proper way.

1604
01:23:07,071 --> 01:23:08,571
Hey, asshole.

1605
01:23:08,572 --> 01:23:10,899
(GRUNTS)

1606
01:23:13,244 --> 01:23:15,537
(HUFFS)

1607
01:23:15,538 --> 01:23:17,989
(GRUNTS)

1608
01:23:20,418 --> 01:23:21,626
Oh, shit.

1609
01:23:21,627 --> 01:23:24,787
I can't leave him like that.

1610
01:23:34,598 --> 01:23:36,799
That's better.

1611
01:23:49,196 --> 01:23:51,814
(HORSE APPROACHING)

1612
01:24:07,506 --> 01:24:08,631
(POUNDING ON DOOR)

1613
01:24:08,632 --> 01:24:11,251
ANNA: Albert?

1614
01:24:13,846 --> 01:24:15,305
Albert!

1615
01:24:15,306 --> 01:24:16,765
Albert, you gotta get out of here.

1616
01:24:16,766 --> 01:24:18,683
Yeah, that's... That's
what I'm doing.

1617
01:24:18,684 --> 01:24:20,310
No, no, no. Like, right now.

1618
01:24:20,311 --> 01:24:21,770
Clinch is gonna be looking for you.

1619
01:24:21,771 --> 01:24:23,438
Yeah, I'm leaving.

1620
01:24:23,439 --> 01:24:25,065
Uh, I'm going to San Francisco.

1621
01:24:25,066 --> 01:24:28,985
Just what I should
have done a week ago.

1622
01:24:28,986 --> 01:24:30,195
I'm so sorry.

1623
01:24:30,196 --> 01:24:32,447
Yeah, well, you know, so am I.

1624
01:24:32,448 --> 01:24:34,115
What about your dad?

1625
01:24:34,116 --> 01:24:36,743
I asked him if he wanted
to come, and he said no.

1626
01:24:36,744 --> 01:24:40,196
He's up on the hill, burying
himself next to Mom.

1627
01:24:41,374 --> 01:24:42,749
Look, I never meant to mislead...

1628
01:24:42,750 --> 01:24:43,833
Okay, you know what, Anna?

1629
01:24:43,834 --> 01:24:45,710
Don't even waste my time, okay?

1630
01:24:45,711 --> 01:24:46,836
Don't even waste my time.

1631
01:24:46,837 --> 01:24:50,507
You had a million opportunities to
tell me, and you just fucking lied.

1632
01:24:50,508 --> 01:24:51,633
I didn't lie.

1633
01:24:51,634 --> 01:24:52,759
What would you call it?

1634
01:24:52,760 --> 01:24:56,012
You're married to the most
vicious killer in the territory.

1635
01:24:56,013 --> 01:24:58,723
You don't think maybe that's
something you should have told me?

1636
01:24:58,724 --> 01:25:01,017
I didn't tell you because I
was trying to protect you.

1637
01:25:01,018 --> 01:25:03,353
Oh, bullshit! You were looking
out for your own self-interest.

1638
01:25:03,354 --> 01:25:06,231
And because I liked you.

1639
01:25:06,232 --> 01:25:09,192
I didn't want to scare you away.

1640
01:25:09,193 --> 01:25:11,736
I never thought I'd meet
someone like you, Albert.

1641
01:25:11,737 --> 01:25:13,905
What, somebody who hasn't killed
people? Somebody like that?

1642
01:25:13,906 --> 01:25:15,198
Yeah, that's really hard to find.

1643
01:25:15,199 --> 01:25:16,366
That's why women are always going,

1644
01:25:16,367 --> 01:25:19,536
"Oh, my God. Why are all
the non-murderers taken?"

1645
01:25:19,537 --> 01:25:21,204
Hey. It's not my fault, all right?

1646
01:25:21,205 --> 01:25:23,039
We were married when I was nine.

1647
01:25:23,040 --> 01:25:25,125
Nine? (SCOFFS)

1648
01:25:25,126 --> 01:25:27,085
How does that even work?
Was there a ceremony?

1649
01:25:27,086 --> 01:25:28,211
Yeah, of course there was a...

1650
01:25:28,212 --> 01:25:30,547
My parents were there,
and a couple of neighbors.

1651
01:25:30,548 --> 01:25:32,007
I just didn't want to end
up like one of those

1652
01:25:32,008 --> 01:25:34,968
15-year-old spinsters, you know?

1653
01:25:34,969 --> 01:25:37,053
You know, I don't even know...

1654
01:25:37,054 --> 01:25:39,639
I don't even know
why I'm surprised.

1655
01:25:39,640 --> 01:25:42,892
Every girl that I ever fall in love
with ends up disappointing me.

1656
01:25:42,893 --> 01:25:46,596
And every time, I'm surprised.

1657
01:25:48,315 --> 01:25:49,649
You love me?

1658
01:25:49,650 --> 01:25:51,985
Oh, you know what?
I'm over it. You can go.

1659
01:25:51,986 --> 01:25:53,611
All right. I lied, fine.

1660
01:25:53,612 --> 01:25:55,905
What was I supposed
to say, Albert? Tell me.

1661
01:25:55,906 --> 01:25:57,657
Was I supposed to go,
"Oh hi, I'm Anna!

1662
01:25:57,658 --> 01:25:59,325
"I've been fucking a
killer since I was 10"?

1663
01:25:59,326 --> 01:26:01,286
Oh, he waited a year?
What a gentleman.

1664
01:26:01,287 --> 01:26:02,787
Well, late nine. I rounded it up.

1665
01:26:02,788 --> 01:26:04,205
It doesn't matter.
I'm done with him.

1666
01:26:04,206 --> 01:26:07,667
I knocked him out, and I stuck
a daisy in his asshole.

1667
01:26:07,668 --> 01:26:09,419
You what?

1668
01:26:09,420 --> 01:26:12,172
That's how much you mean to me.

1669
01:26:12,173 --> 01:26:14,749
You know,

1670
01:26:15,176 --> 01:26:20,255
I loved a girl who
doesn't even exist.

1671
01:26:20,431 --> 01:26:23,475
Is your name even Anna? Huh?

1672
01:26:23,476 --> 01:26:25,602
Or is it something
terrible, like Gwendolyn?

1673
01:26:25,603 --> 01:26:30,857
My name is Anna. I'm that
same girl you fell in love with.

1674
01:26:30,858 --> 01:26:33,643
That was the real me.

1675
01:26:33,861 --> 01:26:38,073
Possibly for the first
time in my entire life.

1676
01:26:38,074 --> 01:26:39,866
I just didn't think I
deserved a good guy.

1677
01:26:39,867 --> 01:26:43,111
But you know what? I do.

1678
01:26:45,873 --> 01:26:48,449
I love you.

1679
01:26:55,091 --> 01:26:56,966
(SHEEP BLEATING)

1680
01:26:56,967 --> 01:26:59,627
(HORSES APPROACHING)

1681
01:27:03,432 --> 01:27:04,766
It's Clinch.

1682
01:27:04,767 --> 01:27:07,719
Oh, shit.

1683
01:27:07,728 --> 01:27:09,187
There's a trail out back
that leads out to the ridge.

1684
01:27:09,188 --> 01:27:10,522
Go.

1685
01:27:10,523 --> 01:27:13,516
- He's gonna kill...
- Anna, just go!

1686
01:27:14,860 --> 01:27:20,148
Albert, he always shoots on "two."

1687
01:27:22,451 --> 01:27:24,861
(BLEATING)

1688
01:27:36,549 --> 01:27:39,209
(HORSE NEIGHS)

1689
01:27:39,844 --> 01:27:40,927
(HUFFS)

1690
01:27:40,928 --> 01:27:45,006
Enoch, Jordy, look
after the horses.

1691
01:28:05,828 --> 01:28:07,454
He ain't here, Clinch.

1692
01:28:07,455 --> 01:28:11,991
Oh, he's around. He's around.

1693
01:28:17,715 --> 01:28:19,716
Stark!

1694
01:28:19,717 --> 01:28:22,710
I know you're here, Stark!

1695
01:28:22,720 --> 01:28:26,798
Ben, check the outhouse.
Lewis, the shed.

1696
01:28:40,905 --> 01:28:43,606
(BLEATING)

1697
01:29:05,471 --> 01:29:08,089
(GASPING)

1698
01:29:09,684 --> 01:29:12,176
(GUN COCKS)

1699
01:29:17,274 --> 01:29:19,109
Lewis.

1700
01:29:19,110 --> 01:29:21,194
Sometime this week, yeah?

1701
01:29:21,195 --> 01:29:23,646
Sorry, boss.

1702
01:29:29,036 --> 01:29:31,321
(GUN COCKS)

1703
01:29:37,420 --> 01:29:39,621
(BLEATING)

1704
01:29:56,689 --> 01:29:58,398
Hey!

1705
01:29:58,399 --> 01:30:01,351
There he goes! Boss!

1706
01:30:05,197 --> 01:30:07,398
Shit.

1707
01:30:10,161 --> 01:30:12,695
- Get him!
- (HORSE NEIGHING)

1708
01:30:31,015 --> 01:30:33,216
Hyah!

1709
01:30:48,407 --> 01:30:50,692
(TRAIN HORN BLOWS)

1710
01:30:58,751 --> 01:31:01,035
(GRUNTING)

1711
01:31:03,089 --> 01:31:04,923
(TRAIN HORN BLOWS)

1712
01:31:04,924 --> 01:31:07,125
Hyah!

1713
01:31:20,731 --> 01:31:22,482
Ha!

1714
01:31:22,483 --> 01:31:25,476
(TRAIN HORN BLOWING)

1715
01:31:31,867 --> 01:31:34,068
(HORSE NEIGHS)

1716
01:31:47,591 --> 01:31:49,959
(HUFFS)

1717
01:31:56,225 --> 01:31:59,227
What in the hell do we do now?

1718
01:31:59,228 --> 01:32:02,263
He'll be back.

1719
01:32:16,746 --> 01:32:20,331
Ah, Curtis. That was
exceptional, buddy.

1720
01:32:20,332 --> 01:32:21,499
I tell you,

1721
01:32:21,500 --> 01:32:23,960
when we get out of this, I'm
gonna get you some horse whores.

1722
01:32:23,961 --> 01:32:25,170
Sound good?

1723
01:32:25,171 --> 01:32:26,629
Get you whatever you want.

1724
01:32:26,630 --> 01:32:28,757
Can even get you a cow,
if you want one of those.

1725
01:32:28,758 --> 01:32:30,342
Want to fuck a cow?

1726
01:32:30,343 --> 01:32:33,386
You seem like a pretty
sexually adventurous guy.

1727
01:32:33,387 --> 01:32:35,880
(BREATHING HEAVILY)

1728
01:32:39,477 --> 01:32:43,012
Now, how the fuck
do you make a fire?

1729
01:32:45,232 --> 01:32:47,400
EDWARD:
Are you sure you want to do this?

1730
01:32:47,401 --> 01:32:49,569
RUTH: Yes, I'm absolutely sure.

1731
01:32:49,570 --> 01:32:52,322
EDWARD: Wow, I can't believe we're
actually gonna have sex. (CHUCKLES)

1732
01:32:52,323 --> 01:32:55,575
RUTH: Eddie, with Clinch Leatherwood
in town, we could all die tomorrow.

1733
01:32:55,576 --> 01:32:57,994
So, under the circumstances,

1734
01:32:57,995 --> 01:33:00,330
I think God will forgive us.

1735
01:33:00,331 --> 01:33:01,998
Okay, here we go.

1736
01:33:01,999 --> 01:33:03,041
Are you excited?

1737
01:33:03,042 --> 01:33:04,834
Yeah, this is my first vagina.

1738
01:33:04,835 --> 01:33:06,336
You've never seen one?

1739
01:33:06,337 --> 01:33:08,755
No. I feel like I should have
a piece of cake or something.

1740
01:33:08,756 --> 01:33:09,839
Okay, you ready?

1741
01:33:09,840 --> 01:33:12,166
- Yeah.
- Okay.

1742
01:33:16,013 --> 01:33:18,548
(SOFTLY) Okay.

1743
01:33:20,267 --> 01:33:22,719
What?

1744
01:33:23,020 --> 01:33:24,854
Are you in pain right now?

1745
01:33:24,855 --> 01:33:25,897
You don't like it.

1746
01:33:25,898 --> 01:33:27,399
No, I love it!

1747
01:33:27,400 --> 01:33:28,983
Yeah, yeah, it's just...

1748
01:33:28,984 --> 01:33:30,527
(CHUCKLING)

1749
01:33:30,528 --> 01:33:33,613
It looks like a firecracker
wrapped in roast beef.

1750
01:33:33,614 --> 01:33:35,365
Yeah, but there's more to it.

1751
01:33:35,366 --> 01:33:37,325
That's just the outside.
There's folds.

1752
01:33:37,326 --> 01:33:39,202
Okay! I'm gonna close
the Bible now.

1753
01:33:39,203 --> 01:33:41,204
Eddie, it's supposed
to be like that.

1754
01:33:41,205 --> 01:33:42,539
It is?

1755
01:33:42,540 --> 01:33:44,374
It's gonna feel good.

1756
01:33:44,375 --> 01:33:45,500
(CHUCKLES)

1757
01:33:45,501 --> 01:33:47,711
I'm really glad I didn't
have that piece of cake.

1758
01:33:47,712 --> 01:33:49,504
(BOTH LAUGHING)

1759
01:33:49,505 --> 01:33:51,923
Oh, okay.

1760
01:33:51,924 --> 01:33:53,550
Okay, ready?

1761
01:33:53,551 --> 01:33:55,427
This is gonna be good.
You're gonna like this.

1762
01:33:55,428 --> 01:33:57,095
EDWARD: Okay, easy, now.

1763
01:33:57,096 --> 01:33:58,888
Sorry. This is...

1764
01:33:58,889 --> 01:34:00,432
Yeah. Wow.

1765
01:34:00,433 --> 01:34:01,766
Okay, is that...

1766
01:34:01,767 --> 01:34:03,059
- Right there?
- RUTH: Yeah.

1767
01:34:03,060 --> 01:34:06,512
EDWARD: Sure, okay. Wow.

1768
01:34:06,897 --> 01:34:08,273
(MOANING)

1769
01:34:08,274 --> 01:34:11,067
Okay, I get it. It's
pretty big, right?

1770
01:34:11,068 --> 01:34:12,569
RUTH: Yeah, you're huge!

1771
01:34:12,570 --> 01:34:13,903
EDWARD: No, I meant you.

1772
01:34:13,904 --> 01:34:15,530
(KNOCK ON DOOR)

1773
01:34:15,531 --> 01:34:17,732
(GRUNTS)

1774
01:34:21,746 --> 01:34:23,329
- Anna!
- Ruth, can I come in?

1775
01:34:23,330 --> 01:34:25,949
Sure.

1776
01:34:32,089 --> 01:34:34,541
(WHISPERING) Clinch is out there.

1777
01:34:43,684 --> 01:34:45,685
He's coming up the stairs!

1778
01:34:45,686 --> 01:34:47,929
Shit!

1779
01:35:02,244 --> 01:35:05,738
Please don't shoot us on sex night.

1780
01:35:19,470 --> 01:35:21,671
(GASPS)

1781
01:35:23,599 --> 01:35:26,885
You and I have a problem.

1782
01:35:30,106 --> 01:35:33,141
(BREATHING DEEPLY)

1783
01:35:42,702 --> 01:35:44,903
(GASPS)

1784
01:35:50,292 --> 01:35:51,793
Oh, shit.

1785
01:35:59,051 --> 01:36:01,252
(BREATHING HEAVILY)

1786
01:36:44,430 --> 01:36:46,881
(SIGHS)

1787
01:37:12,291 --> 01:37:13,500
(PEOPLE MURMURING)

1788
01:37:32,937 --> 01:37:35,605
(TALKING INDISTINCTLY)

1789
01:37:54,208 --> 01:37:56,409
(SIGHS)

1790
01:38:03,342 --> 01:38:06,302
It's coming. I see it, I see it.

1791
01:38:06,303 --> 01:38:08,972
(BABY COOING)

1792
01:38:08,973 --> 01:38:10,974
It's a boy, Mr. Stark.

1793
01:38:10,975 --> 01:38:12,642
All right.

1794
01:38:12,643 --> 01:38:15,311
Well, don't you want
to come hold the baby?

1795
01:38:15,312 --> 01:38:17,480
Fuck off.

1796
01:38:17,481 --> 01:38:19,274
Now, you put that under your pillow

1797
01:38:19,275 --> 01:38:23,770
and the tooth fairy
will leave you a penny.

1798
01:38:25,990 --> 01:38:28,775
(BIRDS CHIRPING)

1799
01:38:29,618 --> 01:38:30,702
(GASPS)

1800
01:38:30,703 --> 01:38:32,495
There ain't no tooth fairy, idiot!

1801
01:38:32,496 --> 01:38:35,823
Now, clean up that horse shit!

1802
01:38:37,335 --> 01:38:40,337
Class, please welcome
our graduation speaker,

1803
01:38:40,338 --> 01:38:43,581
President Abraham Lincoln.

1804
01:38:47,678 --> 01:38:49,721
Hiya, shmucks!

1805
01:38:49,722 --> 01:38:52,766
Four score and seven years ago,

1806
01:38:52,767 --> 01:38:54,851
I was broke,

1807
01:38:54,852 --> 01:38:56,686
just like you.

1808
01:38:56,687 --> 01:38:59,439
But now, I'm the president

1809
01:38:59,440 --> 01:39:02,734
and I'm so fucking rich.

1810
01:39:02,735 --> 01:39:06,863
I can have all the licorice I want.

1811
01:39:06,864 --> 01:39:10,233
I don't think that's the
real President Lincoln.

1812
01:39:10,743 --> 01:39:11,951
ALBERT: Hey, Louise!

1813
01:39:11,952 --> 01:39:14,037
Louise, check out
this cool bike I got!

1814
01:39:14,038 --> 01:39:15,246
Hey, you want to go down to the...

1815
01:39:15,247 --> 01:39:18,324
(SCREAMING) Oh, shit!

1816
01:39:18,417 --> 01:39:20,418
- (WOMEN SCREAMING)
- No! Sorry! Sorry!

1817
01:39:20,419 --> 01:39:22,996
(SCREAMING CONTINUES)

1818
01:39:24,382 --> 01:39:26,833
No, no, no!

1819
01:39:28,761 --> 01:39:29,886
(CLAMORING)

1820
01:39:29,887 --> 01:39:30,929
Stop!

1821
01:39:30,930 --> 01:39:33,056
Get back here!

1822
01:39:33,057 --> 01:39:34,140
Shit, not again.

1823
01:39:34,141 --> 01:39:36,351
Get that son of a bitch!

1824
01:39:36,352 --> 01:39:38,761
(ALL SHOUTING)

1825
01:39:39,939 --> 01:39:42,390
(GROANING)

1826
01:39:49,907 --> 01:39:51,366
ANNA: You're an idiot.

1827
01:39:51,367 --> 01:39:54,869
How can you be so blind
with eyes that big?

1828
01:39:54,870 --> 01:39:57,789
They're not that big.

1829
01:39:57,790 --> 01:39:59,624
(SCREAMING)

1830
01:39:59,625 --> 01:40:02,544
- FOY: Pardon me, Albert.
- (PANTING)

1831
01:40:02,545 --> 01:40:06,423
The lads and I have prepared
something special for you.

1832
01:40:06,424 --> 01:40:08,958
(FOLK MUSIC PLAYING)

1833
01:40:09,802 --> 01:40:12,303
<i>You may not have the looks</i>

1834
01:40:12,304 --> 01:40:13,888
<i>You may not have the dash</i>

1835
01:40:13,889 --> 01:40:15,807
<i>But you'll win yourself a girl</i>

1836
01:40:15,808 --> 01:40:17,559
<i>If you've only got a moustache</i>

1837
01:40:17,560 --> 01:40:19,811
<i>A moustache
A moustache</i>

1838
01:40:19,812 --> 01:40:23,264
<i>If you've only got a moustache</i>

1839
01:40:32,992 --> 01:40:36,077
We are the guardians of the future.

1840
01:40:36,078 --> 01:40:38,863
Enter when ready.

1841
01:40:43,794 --> 01:40:46,371
- (HISSES)
- (GASPS)

1842
01:41:12,531 --> 01:41:14,983
(LOUD THUD)

1843
01:41:15,159 --> 01:41:17,735
(SCREECHING)

1844
01:41:31,008 --> 01:41:33,376
Stark!

1845
01:41:33,469 --> 01:41:35,920
(SHRIEKING)

1846
01:41:36,097 --> 01:41:38,548
(GASPING)

1847
01:41:44,939 --> 01:41:46,022
(IN NATIVE LANGUAGE)

1848
01:42:11,298 --> 01:42:13,625
(SIGHS)

1849
01:42:56,594 --> 01:42:58,878
(ANNA GRUNTS)

1850
01:43:04,769 --> 01:43:05,852
(BARKS)

1851
01:43:05,853 --> 01:43:08,772
All right, sweetheart.

1852
01:43:08,773 --> 01:43:12,567
Let's find out if your wee
boyfriend gives a shit about you.

1853
01:43:12,568 --> 01:43:15,070
He's got

1854
01:43:15,071 --> 01:43:17,572
six minutes till noon.

1855
01:43:17,573 --> 01:43:19,115
And if he doesn't show,

1856
01:43:19,116 --> 01:43:23,536
he'll be picking up pieces
of you all over the street.

1857
01:43:23,537 --> 01:43:25,863
Stark!

1858
01:43:41,222 --> 01:43:44,757
Oh, look who's here.

1859
01:43:53,651 --> 01:43:55,852
(GROANS)

1860
01:44:02,118 --> 01:44:03,618
Let her go, Clinch.

1861
01:44:03,619 --> 01:44:07,872
Well, now, true love conquers
all, doesn't it, sweetheart?

1862
01:44:07,873 --> 01:44:09,499
Let her go,

1863
01:44:09,500 --> 01:44:11,668
and let's you and me just
settle this like adults.

1864
01:44:11,669 --> 01:44:14,037
(LAUGHING)

1865
01:44:14,255 --> 01:44:15,630
Lewis, Ben.

1866
01:44:15,631 --> 01:44:18,508
- Come and take this whore.
- Albert.

1867
01:44:18,509 --> 01:44:21,261
Don't be stupid, Albert!
Get out of here!

1868
01:44:21,262 --> 01:44:22,595
Get out of here!

1869
01:44:22,596 --> 01:44:23,972
Too late for that.

1870
01:44:23,973 --> 01:44:26,016
He's already been stupid.

1871
01:44:26,017 --> 01:44:27,767
Haven't you, Albert?

1872
01:44:27,768 --> 01:44:30,186
You've been with my wife.

1873
01:44:30,187 --> 01:44:32,564
Well, we haven't actually done it,

1874
01:44:32,565 --> 01:44:35,817
if that makes any
kind of a difference.

1875
01:44:35,818 --> 01:44:38,153
Okay, look, look, look.
Here's my idea, okay?

1876
01:44:38,154 --> 01:44:40,030
You're a pretty tough guy, yeah?

1877
01:44:40,031 --> 01:44:41,281
Why don't you prove it?

1878
01:44:41,282 --> 01:44:45,702
Gunfight. You and me.
Right here. Right now.

1879
01:44:45,703 --> 01:44:47,454
(CHUCKLES)

1880
01:44:47,455 --> 01:44:50,373
You really do have a
death wish, don't you?

1881
01:44:50,374 --> 01:44:53,668
Yeah, I guess you'll have
to find that out, huh?

1882
01:44:53,669 --> 01:44:55,870
Uh-huh.

1883
01:44:59,884 --> 01:45:02,585
Take out your gun.

1884
01:45:05,431 --> 01:45:06,598
Point it at me.

1885
01:45:06,599 --> 01:45:08,800
(SOFTLY) No.

1886
01:45:11,520 --> 01:45:13,229
Good boy.

1887
01:45:13,230 --> 01:45:17,267
Now, we shoot on three.

1888
01:45:18,986 --> 01:45:20,945
One.

1889
01:45:20,946 --> 01:45:23,073
(GASPS)

1890
01:45:23,074 --> 01:45:25,367
(LAUGHING)

1891
01:45:25,368 --> 01:45:26,493
(GROANS)

1892
01:45:26,494 --> 01:45:27,702
(WHIMPERS)

1893
01:45:27,703 --> 01:45:29,746
I've been playing cards a long time

1894
01:45:29,747 --> 01:45:31,748
and I would never have
bet on that, Stark.

1895
01:45:31,749 --> 01:45:34,158
Where'd you learn to shoot?

1896
01:45:34,168 --> 01:45:35,377
Your wife.

1897
01:45:35,378 --> 01:45:38,037
Oh, snap!

1898
01:45:38,047 --> 01:45:40,415
Holy fuck.

1899
01:45:40,716 --> 01:45:42,509
Okay, look, look, look!
Before you kill me,

1900
01:45:42,510 --> 01:45:44,552
just grant me a few
last words. All right?

1901
01:45:44,553 --> 01:45:46,763
Make it quick.

1902
01:45:46,764 --> 01:45:48,682
Let Anna live.

1903
01:45:48,683 --> 01:45:50,100
All right?

1904
01:45:50,101 --> 01:45:51,267
Let her live.

1905
01:45:51,268 --> 01:45:52,644
This is not her fault.

1906
01:45:52,645 --> 01:45:54,688
I kissed her, she didn't
kiss me, all right?

1907
01:45:54,689 --> 01:45:56,815
It's not her fault.

1908
01:45:56,816 --> 01:45:58,608
I mean, she didn't tell
me she was married,

1909
01:45:58,609 --> 01:46:00,402
so it's a little bit
her fault, I guess.

1910
01:46:00,403 --> 01:46:01,945
So, yeah, I guess
that's kind of true.

1911
01:46:01,946 --> 01:46:05,031
So, maybe just shoot
her in the arm.

1912
01:46:05,032 --> 01:46:06,116
What the...

1913
01:46:06,117 --> 01:46:07,701
And one more thing.

1914
01:46:07,702 --> 01:46:09,828
Um, my grandparents were Arabic.

1915
01:46:09,829 --> 01:46:12,288
So, I'm required by
Muslim tradition

1916
01:46:12,289 --> 01:46:15,250
to recite the Islamic death
chant immediately before dying.

1917
01:46:15,251 --> 01:46:17,127
This will only take a moment.

1918
01:46:17,128 --> 01:46:19,829
(CHANTING)

1919
01:46:36,772 --> 01:46:38,973
(CREAKS)

1920
01:46:40,151 --> 01:46:41,484
Hey, what's the matter, Clinch?

1921
01:46:41,485 --> 01:46:43,153
You not feeling well?

1922
01:46:43,154 --> 01:46:44,821
You okay, boss?

1923
01:46:44,822 --> 01:46:46,656
What's happening to me?

1924
01:46:46,657 --> 01:46:50,493
You know, there are a million
ways to die in the West, Clinch.

1925
01:46:50,494 --> 01:46:53,830
There's, uh, famine,
disease, gunfights.

1926
01:46:53,831 --> 01:46:57,417
And, uh, wild animals.
You know, like snakes.

1927
01:46:57,418 --> 01:46:58,918
And, you know, the funny thing is,

1928
01:46:58,919 --> 01:47:00,795
you don't even have to get bitten.

1929
01:47:00,796 --> 01:47:02,589
All you need is a
little bit of the venom

1930
01:47:02,590 --> 01:47:04,341
introduced into your bloodstream

1931
01:47:04,342 --> 01:47:06,426
and you're pretty much screwed.

1932
01:47:06,427 --> 01:47:09,346
<i>For example, if you drain
a certain amount of venom</i>

1933
01:47:09,347 --> 01:47:11,765
<i>from the fangs of a diamondback
rattler into a hollow-tip bullet,</i>

1934
01:47:11,766 --> 01:47:13,683
<i>you really only need one shot.</i>

1935
01:47:13,684 --> 01:47:17,270
<i>Now, I knew my aim wasn't good enough
to hit you anywhere important.</i>

1936
01:47:17,271 --> 01:47:19,356
<i>But if I caught you by surprise...</i>

1937
01:47:19,357 --> 01:47:22,359
<i>Well, Anna taught me just enough
to get me in the ballpark.</i>

1938
01:47:22,360 --> 01:47:24,778
And just a small amount
of venom in an open wound

1939
01:47:24,779 --> 01:47:26,321
is enough to kill a man if he's...

1940
01:47:26,322 --> 01:47:28,198
RUTH: Albert.

1941
01:47:28,199 --> 01:47:31,326
He's dead. You did it.

1942
01:47:31,327 --> 01:47:32,494
Oh.

1943
01:47:32,495 --> 01:47:33,995
Yeah.

1944
01:47:33,996 --> 01:47:36,414
Did he hear all that
smart stuff I did?

1945
01:47:36,415 --> 01:47:37,540
Uh...

1946
01:47:37,541 --> 01:47:39,959
No. No, I don't think so.

1947
01:47:39,960 --> 01:47:41,086
Oh.

1948
01:47:41,087 --> 01:47:42,337
Well, it was still good, though.

1949
01:47:42,338 --> 01:47:43,463
Yeah, it was great.

1950
01:47:43,464 --> 01:47:45,256
I thought it was really good.

1951
01:47:45,257 --> 01:47:46,549
(GRUNTING)

1952
01:47:46,550 --> 01:47:47,676
(GROANS IN PAIN)

1953
01:47:47,677 --> 01:47:48,802
MAN: Stop!

1954
01:47:48,803 --> 01:47:51,504
Albert!

1955
01:48:01,315 --> 01:48:02,565
I'm really horny right now.

1956
01:48:02,566 --> 01:48:03,817
(GIGGLING)

1957
01:48:03,818 --> 01:48:07,020
Let's go in the shade and fuck.

1958
01:48:07,363 --> 01:48:08,571
(MURMURING)

1959
01:48:08,572 --> 01:48:10,156
Well done, sheep boy.

1960
01:48:10,157 --> 01:48:12,367
(SIGHS)
Hey, sorry I killed your husband.

1961
01:48:12,368 --> 01:48:14,911
Oh, God. That was never
gonna work out anyway.

1962
01:48:14,912 --> 01:48:16,579
He's Methodist, I'm half-Jewish.

1963
01:48:16,580 --> 01:48:19,082
- (LAUGHING) Are you? You are?
- No!

1964
01:48:19,083 --> 01:48:20,333
Oh, thank God!

1965
01:48:20,334 --> 01:48:22,411
- You're not really Arabic, are you?
- No, no, no.

1966
01:48:22,412 --> 01:48:24,387
Oh, thank God. Because
I was like, "Ah, kill me!"

1967
01:48:24,388 --> 01:48:26,256
I know, right? "No! Oh, my God!"

1968
01:48:26,257 --> 01:48:29,459
- No, we're fine. We're okay.
- LOUISE: Albert!

1969
01:48:29,593 --> 01:48:30,969
Hey, Louise.

1970
01:48:30,970 --> 01:48:34,764
Hey. Listen, if you want to...

1971
01:48:34,765 --> 01:48:38,810
If you want to talk about
things, I would like that.

1972
01:48:38,811 --> 01:48:43,640
I mean, I could come by your
place, like, later tonight.

1973
01:48:44,275 --> 01:48:45,942
You know, uh, Louise, I would,

1974
01:48:45,943 --> 01:48:50,647
but I really gotta go
home and work on myself.

1975
01:48:54,618 --> 01:48:56,745
ANNA:
So, you killed Clinch Leatherwood,

1976
01:48:56,746 --> 01:48:59,289
the deadliest gunman
on the frontier.

1977
01:48:59,290 --> 01:49:01,333
Yeah, I guess I did, huh?

1978
01:49:01,334 --> 01:49:02,459
(BARKS)

1979
01:49:02,460 --> 01:49:05,128
ANNA: You know, there's probably
gonna be some reward money.

1980
01:49:05,129 --> 01:49:07,964
ALBERT: You know,
I didn't think about that.

1981
01:49:07,965 --> 01:49:11,084
ANNA: What are you gonna do?

1982
01:49:43,000 --> 01:49:45,210
Step right up, folks.
Step right up!

1983
01:49:45,211 --> 01:49:48,713
Who wants to take a gander
at the shooting gallery?

1984
01:49:48,714 --> 01:49:51,541
DJANGO: I'll take a shot.

1985
01:49:56,722 --> 01:49:59,015
(CROWD GASPS)

1986
01:49:59,016 --> 01:50:00,975
People die at the fair.

1987
01:50:00,976 --> 01:50:03,803
(COUNTRY MUSIC PLAYING)

1988
01:55:37,355 --> 01:55:42,164
DJANGO: What the fuck? Somebody
bring me one of them white women.