1 00:00:00,580 --> 00:00:02,310 Previously on Mom. 2 00:00:02,310 --> 00:00:04,360 So, Regina, tell us about you. 3 00:00:04,560 --> 00:00:06,040 I'm a money manager. 4 00:00:06,040 --> 00:00:08,890 People trust me with millions of dollars. So... 5 00:00:09,440 --> 00:00:12,060 yeah, maybe I like to take the edge off 6 00:00:12,060 --> 00:00:13,160 at the end of the day 7 00:00:13,160 --> 00:00:15,530 with a couple bottles of wine. 8 00:00:15,920 --> 00:00:17,540 Few shots of tequila. 9 00:00:18,830 --> 00:00:20,530 Fistful of muscle relaxers. 10 00:00:21,880 --> 00:00:24,640 I'm dating this sweet, smart, 11 00:00:25,400 --> 00:00:29,290 smokin' hot guy who's just a train wreck. 12 00:00:31,130 --> 00:00:32,450 Can I ask you something? 13 00:00:32,830 --> 00:00:33,630 Sure. 14 00:00:34,220 --> 00:00:36,360 Are sober people allowed to do coke? 15 00:00:38,530 --> 00:00:41,110 You know how I told you people trust me with their money? 16 00:00:41,120 --> 00:00:41,960 Yeah. 17 00:00:41,960 --> 00:00:43,070 They shouldn't. 18 00:00:45,370 --> 00:00:47,210 I embezzled from my clients. 19 00:00:48,230 --> 00:00:49,040 Why? 20 00:00:49,040 --> 00:00:50,720 What kind of question is that? 21 00:00:51,000 --> 00:00:52,080 What's a better question? 22 00:00:52,080 --> 00:00:53,390 How? 23 00:00:54,450 --> 00:00:55,400 Anyway... 24 00:00:57,220 --> 00:00:59,680 The real reason I came here tonight was... 25 00:01:00,020 --> 00:01:03,230 I think the police might be waiting for me at my house. 26 00:01:05,220 --> 00:01:07,510 I can't believe they found you guilty. 27 00:01:07,710 --> 00:01:10,180 I can. I stole $3 million. 28 00:01:11,790 --> 00:01:13,880 Kind of gives you faith in the legal system. 29 00:01:15,440 --> 00:01:16,360 Shut up. 30 00:01:18,200 --> 00:01:19,980 So what happens next? 31 00:01:19,980 --> 00:01:21,750 There's a sentencing hearing. 32 00:01:22,030 --> 00:01:23,580 I'm hoping the judge will go easy on me 33 00:01:23,580 --> 00:01:25,090 'cause I've been turning my life around. 34 00:01:25,090 --> 00:01:27,300 - Have you? - Don't push me, Chopstick. 35 00:01:30,070 --> 00:01:31,440 Maybe they'll send you to one of those 36 00:01:31,450 --> 00:01:33,330 swanky country club jails. 37 00:01:33,330 --> 00:01:35,130 Get real. I'm a black woman 38 00:01:35,140 --> 00:01:37,000 who embezzled money from white people. 39 00:01:37,070 --> 00:01:38,800 I'm going to jail jail. 40 00:01:39,240 --> 00:01:41,680 Someone's gonna buy my ass for a Kit Kat bar. 41 00:01:42,600 --> 00:01:43,860 Well, it's only fair. 42 00:01:43,860 --> 00:01:45,730 Kit Kat bars helped build that thing. 43 00:01:47,320 --> 00:01:50,400 My lawyer said it might help if I had some character witnesses. 44 00:01:50,440 --> 00:01:52,410 Oh, so you need people who can testify to 45 00:01:52,410 --> 00:01:55,170 how you've turned into a productive member of society. 46 00:01:55,250 --> 00:01:56,820 - Yeah. - Yikes. 47 00:01:58,160 --> 00:02:01,300 Well, it wouldn't be the first time I've lied under oath. 48 00:02:02,220 --> 00:02:05,140 Thanks, but I was kind of hoping for someone a little less... 49 00:02:05,150 --> 00:02:06,060 sketchy. 50 00:02:06,070 --> 00:02:08,570 That's funny. Sketchy was my street name. 51 00:02:09,880 --> 00:02:11,210 What about you, Christy? 52 00:02:11,400 --> 00:02:13,670 Oh, I'm not squeaky clean, either. 53 00:02:13,840 --> 00:02:15,310 Especially not in Nevada. 54 00:02:15,670 --> 00:02:17,160 And parts of Utah. 55 00:02:18,230 --> 00:02:20,200 I'm not allowed to travel abroad. 56 00:02:20,560 --> 00:02:22,390 It's not a competition, Mom. 57 00:02:23,260 --> 00:02:24,550 You'll be great. 58 00:02:24,550 --> 00:02:27,720 Just look at the judge like one of those big-eyed kid paintings. 59 00:02:27,720 --> 00:02:28,740 He'll eat it up. 60 00:02:28,740 --> 00:02:31,320 - You think? - Oh. Show me. 61 00:02:33,300 --> 00:02:36,030 Open your mouth a little, so you look like you're about to cry. 62 00:02:39,500 --> 00:02:41,740 Tell me that doesn't look like house arrest to you. 63 00:02:43,580 --> 00:02:45,610 Come on, I can do that. 64 00:02:50,000 --> 00:02:52,590 You look like someone who just huffed some paint. 65 00:02:53,550 --> 00:02:55,090 Okay, for that, you're buying. 66 00:02:55,100 --> 00:02:56,600 Mom. She's going to prison. 67 00:02:56,600 --> 00:02:58,250 Where she will eat for free. 68 00:02:59,330 --> 00:03:01,150 Come on, we're gonna be late for the meeting. 69 00:03:01,150 --> 00:03:03,290 Oh, actually, I can't make it. 70 00:03:03,350 --> 00:03:04,850 I've got to help a friend move. 71 00:03:04,850 --> 00:03:05,900 Who's the friend? 72 00:03:06,150 --> 00:03:07,240 Do you know Denise? 73 00:03:07,250 --> 00:03:07,990 No. 74 00:03:08,030 --> 00:03:09,210 It's Denise. 75 00:03:11,090 --> 00:03:12,340 Catch you later. 76 00:03:14,740 --> 00:03:16,120 Your daughter's an amazing woman. 77 00:03:16,120 --> 00:03:17,710 She's a lying whore. 78 00:03:18,810 --> 00:03:20,090 What? - There's no Denise. 79 00:03:20,090 --> 00:03:22,360 She's going to see her pothead boyfriend. 80 00:03:23,670 --> 00:03:25,580 All I saw was the big eyes. 81 00:03:25,920 --> 00:03:27,640 She's gonna be great on the stand. 82 00:03:28,780 --> 00:03:29,860 You ready to go? 83 00:03:30,440 --> 00:03:32,680 Let me just use the ladies' room. 84 00:03:33,000 --> 00:03:33,840 Why don't you just take a leak 85 00:03:33,840 --> 00:03:35,340 right here in front of everybody? 86 00:03:36,480 --> 00:03:37,030 What? 87 00:03:37,040 --> 00:03:39,300 You're going to prison, you might as well get used to it. 88 00:03:41,150 --> 00:03:45,320 {\an2}{\pos(70,258)}m 20 0 l 209 0 b 218 0 229 11 229 20 l 229 209 b 229 218 218 228 209 228 l 20 228 b 11 228 0 218 0 209 l 0 20 b 0 11 11 0 20 0 89 00:03:41,150 --> 00:03:45,320 {\an2}{\pos(70,258)}m 115 64 l 115 35 l 171 0 l 177 0 l 133 46 l 143 52 l 179 0 l 184 0 l 159 63 l 229 107 l 229 182 l 145 96 l 135 122 l 207 227 l 137 227 l 115 172 l 115 93 l 126 76 l 115 64 l 104 76 l 115 93 l 115 172 l 93 227 l 23 227 l 95 122 l 84 96 l 0 182 l 0 107 l 70 63 l 45 0 l 50 0 l 87 52 l 97 46 l 52 0 l 59 0 l 115 35 90 00:03:41,150 --> 00:03:45,320 {\an2}{\pos(60,248)}m 71 60 b 71 0 161 0 161 60 b 161 120 71 120 71 60 91 00:04:02,230 --> 00:04:03,170 You asleep? 92 00:04:03,910 --> 00:04:04,680 No. 93 00:04:05,320 --> 00:04:07,070 Just enjoying the moment. 94 00:04:09,170 --> 00:04:10,100 Me, too. 95 00:04:10,930 --> 00:04:12,070 If I tell you something, 96 00:04:12,070 --> 00:04:13,970 you promise you won't freak out? 97 00:04:14,660 --> 00:04:17,750 I'll try. Am I gonna need antibiotics? 98 00:04:20,580 --> 00:04:21,490 No. 99 00:04:22,510 --> 00:04:24,600 I think I'm falling in love with you. 100 00:04:28,450 --> 00:04:29,430 You freaked out? 101 00:04:31,740 --> 00:04:32,860 That depends. 102 00:04:32,880 --> 00:04:34,350 How high are you right now? 103 00:04:35,180 --> 00:04:38,160 On a scale of Woody Harrelson to Willie Nelson. 104 00:04:39,530 --> 00:04:40,530 Snoop Dogg. 105 00:04:42,260 --> 00:04:44,000 So you might not remember this. 106 00:04:44,340 --> 00:04:45,520 I'll remember. 107 00:04:47,780 --> 00:04:50,140 Traditionally, this is where you say 108 00:04:50,140 --> 00:04:51,960 you're falling in love with me. 109 00:04:53,430 --> 00:04:54,540 Oh, God. 110 00:04:56,990 --> 00:04:58,230 I might be. 111 00:04:58,670 --> 00:04:59,540 Good. 112 00:05:05,420 --> 00:05:06,720 You ready for round two? 113 00:05:06,750 --> 00:05:08,400 I am. 114 00:05:08,400 --> 00:05:09,740 But I have to go to work. 115 00:05:09,740 --> 00:05:12,380 No, don't go, stay. 116 00:05:12,380 --> 00:05:15,580 I'll make us waffles, I'll read you some of my poetry. 117 00:05:16,010 --> 00:05:17,110 Seriously? 118 00:05:17,420 --> 00:05:19,980 I've got a fireman who writes poetry? 119 00:05:20,150 --> 00:05:23,240 I prefer to think of myself as a poet who puts out fires. 120 00:05:24,410 --> 00:05:25,410 Damn you. 121 00:05:26,150 --> 00:05:27,040 What are you doing? 122 00:05:27,370 --> 00:05:28,850 Calling in sick. 123 00:05:32,720 --> 00:05:33,800 Gabriel. 124 00:05:33,800 --> 00:05:35,020 It's Christy. 125 00:05:36,180 --> 00:05:38,830 I-I think I got that thing that's going around. 126 00:05:39,710 --> 00:05:42,180 So I won't be in today, maybe tomorrow. Bye. 127 00:05:45,090 --> 00:05:47,250 All right, I'm all yours. 128 00:05:47,540 --> 00:05:50,000 Do that sick voice again. I think it's kind of sexy. 129 00:05:50,000 --> 00:05:52,160 - Kiss me. - Nope, I was wrong. 130 00:06:09,950 --> 00:06:12,070 Hey, where you been? 131 00:06:12,570 --> 00:06:14,090 What do you mean, where have I been? 132 00:06:14,190 --> 00:06:14,980 Work. 133 00:06:16,900 --> 00:06:17,940 What are you doing? 134 00:06:17,990 --> 00:06:19,540 Frosting cupcakes. 135 00:06:19,660 --> 00:06:20,790 What's the occasion? 136 00:06:20,790 --> 00:06:23,960 It's You Signed Up to be Snack Mom and Forgot Day. 137 00:06:27,020 --> 00:06:29,420 Nope, forgetful mothers do not get snacks. 138 00:06:31,150 --> 00:06:32,060 You know... 139 00:06:32,530 --> 00:06:34,510 cupcakes aren't a very healthy choice. 140 00:06:34,510 --> 00:06:37,590 Neither is criticizing me for doing your freakin' job. 141 00:06:39,010 --> 00:06:41,100 Why don't I just finish that up for you? 142 00:06:41,780 --> 00:06:42,540 Fine. 143 00:06:46,870 --> 00:06:48,210 So, a long night, huh? 144 00:06:48,210 --> 00:06:49,670 Ugh, brutal. 145 00:06:50,470 --> 00:06:52,850 I'm really thinking about going back to school. 146 00:06:52,880 --> 00:06:55,130 I cannot wait tables my entire life. 147 00:06:55,130 --> 00:06:57,290 - Good for you. - Yeah, 148 00:06:57,400 --> 00:07:00,040 I'm tired of spending ten hours a day on my feet. 149 00:07:00,040 --> 00:07:01,910 You sure you don't mean on your back? 150 00:07:05,680 --> 00:07:06,440 What? 151 00:07:06,590 --> 00:07:09,030 Gabriel called to say he's sorry you missed work 152 00:07:09,030 --> 00:07:10,830 and hopes you're feeling better. 153 00:07:16,590 --> 00:07:18,940 So what are you thinking about studying in school? 154 00:07:23,150 --> 00:07:24,230 All right, fine. 155 00:07:24,710 --> 00:07:26,830 I blew off work and spent the night with David. 156 00:07:26,830 --> 00:07:28,380 But why lie about it? 157 00:07:29,290 --> 00:07:31,010 'Cause I'm kind of a liar. 158 00:07:34,580 --> 00:07:36,040 Is that where you were when you missed 159 00:07:36,040 --> 00:07:38,160 your daughter's Lamaze class yesterday? 160 00:07:38,750 --> 00:07:40,270 Oh, no, was that yesterday? 161 00:07:40,270 --> 00:07:41,900 Don't worry, covered for you. 162 00:07:41,900 --> 00:07:43,360 20 women going... 163 00:07:44,450 --> 00:07:45,790 ...for a freakin' hour. 164 00:07:45,790 --> 00:07:48,360 It sounded like Japanese porn. 165 00:07:52,110 --> 00:07:54,790 You are the best grandmother. 166 00:07:54,790 --> 00:07:57,160 Yeah, only because you're the worst mother. 167 00:07:58,420 --> 00:08:00,460 Look, I am not gonna tell you how to live your life, 168 00:08:00,460 --> 00:08:01,530 but you're screwing up. 169 00:08:01,530 --> 00:08:03,030 You are in over your head with this guy, 170 00:08:03,030 --> 00:08:04,860 you need to snap out of it. 171 00:08:05,130 --> 00:08:07,730 I thought you weren't gonna tell me how to live my life? 172 00:08:07,840 --> 00:08:09,790 You're not the only liar in this room. 173 00:08:11,700 --> 00:08:13,570 It just so happens that 174 00:08:13,580 --> 00:08:16,280 that guy told me he loves me tonight. 175 00:08:16,280 --> 00:08:19,560 Oh, well, love. 176 00:08:19,920 --> 00:08:22,450 That changes everything. 177 00:08:23,760 --> 00:08:25,750 You deserve a cupcake. 178 00:08:38,560 --> 00:08:39,550 Not bad. 179 00:08:44,660 --> 00:08:47,540 Oh, I can't promise anything, 180 00:08:47,540 --> 00:08:49,240 but I'll try. 181 00:08:50,550 --> 00:08:52,640 Yeah, I miss you, too. 182 00:08:54,030 --> 00:08:55,460 Hey, you sound a lot better. 183 00:08:56,720 --> 00:08:58,610 It comes and goes. 184 00:09:00,190 --> 00:09:01,470 Well, I'm glad you're back. 185 00:09:01,470 --> 00:09:02,810 Please wash your hands. 186 00:09:02,810 --> 00:09:03,780 A lot. 187 00:09:07,190 --> 00:09:10,700 Hey, Paul, is Rudy still selling weed on the side? 188 00:09:10,700 --> 00:09:12,110 Oh, uh, yes. 189 00:09:13,450 --> 00:09:15,810 Oh, hey, didn't see you there. 190 00:09:15,810 --> 00:09:17,360 Step into my office. 191 00:09:17,620 --> 00:09:18,970 You do it in the freezer? 192 00:09:19,170 --> 00:09:21,090 Cold people don't haggle. 193 00:09:24,210 --> 00:09:26,970 So, would you like to hear the specials? 194 00:09:28,220 --> 00:09:29,170 Okay. 195 00:09:29,260 --> 00:09:31,650 Tonight we have a locally produced Sonoma Kush 196 00:09:31,660 --> 00:09:36,310 which pairs very well with a lovely 1978 Quaalude. 197 00:09:37,740 --> 00:09:39,600 No, just the Kush. 198 00:09:39,690 --> 00:09:42,600 Good choice. So what are we thinking, half a kilo? 199 00:09:43,250 --> 00:09:45,500 No, just a couple of joints. 200 00:09:46,450 --> 00:09:47,780 Are you kidding me? 201 00:09:48,350 --> 00:09:51,390 I'm freezing my balls off for a couple of joints? 202 00:09:51,390 --> 00:09:53,930 Look, paul handles the nickel-and-dime crap. 203 00:09:53,930 --> 00:09:55,390 W-Wait, wait, uh, 204 00:09:55,390 --> 00:09:57,670 this stays just between you and me, right? 205 00:09:57,670 --> 00:10:00,210 Absolutely. I will protect your reputation. 206 00:10:00,640 --> 00:10:02,150 Oh, what are you looking at? 207 00:10:02,150 --> 00:10:04,130 Yes, I'm banging the little blonde. 208 00:10:10,650 --> 00:10:11,960 What the hell am I doing? 209 00:10:11,960 --> 00:10:13,800 - Christy. - Yeah?! Hi! Who?! 210 00:10:14,750 --> 00:10:16,260 Oh, Regina. 211 00:10:16,410 --> 00:10:17,790 You scared the crap out of me. 212 00:10:17,800 --> 00:10:20,330 I need a favor and I didn't want to bother you in the restaurant. 213 00:10:20,330 --> 00:10:23,490 Oh, so you decided to give me a heart attack in the parking lot? 214 00:10:24,080 --> 00:10:25,650 Here, take this. 215 00:10:26,200 --> 00:10:28,370 While I'm in prison, I want you to hold it for me. 216 00:10:29,110 --> 00:10:30,050 What's in it? 217 00:10:30,850 --> 00:10:32,340 I don't think that concerns you. 218 00:10:33,830 --> 00:10:35,680 Oh, my God, is this some of the money you stole? 219 00:10:35,680 --> 00:10:37,440 No, that's money I earned. 220 00:10:37,440 --> 00:10:39,690 But the Feds will take it if they know I have it. 221 00:10:39,820 --> 00:10:40,890 How'd you earn it? 222 00:10:40,890 --> 00:10:42,550 Selling Mary Kay cosmetics. 223 00:10:42,640 --> 00:10:45,730 Now... are you still good for being my character witness 224 00:10:45,730 --> 00:10:46,820 in court tomorrow? 225 00:10:47,670 --> 00:10:49,110 Yeah, yeah, sure. 226 00:10:49,720 --> 00:10:52,240 Should I bring the box of stolen money with me? 227 00:10:53,010 --> 00:10:55,660 No. You can leave it and the sarcasm at home. 228 00:10:56,850 --> 00:10:57,350 Just... 229 00:10:57,350 --> 00:10:59,450 tell the judge how I've turned my life around 230 00:10:59,450 --> 00:11:01,390 and that I'm a fine, upstanding citizen. 231 00:11:02,130 --> 00:11:02,950 Got it. 232 00:11:03,160 --> 00:11:04,060 Thank you. 233 00:11:04,620 --> 00:11:05,850 You're a good friend. 234 00:11:05,920 --> 00:11:06,970 See you tomorrow. 235 00:11:07,370 --> 00:11:08,400 Regina, wait. 236 00:11:10,050 --> 00:11:12,130 If I had a real emergency, 237 00:11:12,130 --> 00:11:13,320 do you think I could... 238 00:11:13,810 --> 00:11:16,000 you know... dip into it? 239 00:11:16,490 --> 00:11:18,070 Define "Real emergency." 240 00:11:19,300 --> 00:11:21,940 I don't know, my kid needs an operation... 241 00:11:23,050 --> 00:11:26,080 'cause his mom doesn't have... 242 00:11:26,310 --> 00:11:27,540 satellite TV. 243 00:11:30,820 --> 00:11:32,800 Just give me the big eyes tomorrow, 244 00:11:32,800 --> 00:11:34,060 I'll get you HBO. 245 00:11:46,200 --> 00:11:47,200 Hello, Christy. 246 00:11:50,690 --> 00:11:53,790 Oh, no. No, no, no. No, no. No, no, no, no, no, no... 247 00:11:53,790 --> 00:11:54,890 Get back here! 248 00:11:55,100 --> 00:11:57,090 I don't have time for an intervention! 249 00:11:57,090 --> 00:11:58,190 Get! 250 00:12:01,760 --> 00:12:04,480 I'm only coming back 'cause it's my house. 251 00:12:05,810 --> 00:12:06,700 Sit. 252 00:12:08,670 --> 00:12:10,040 What are you doing here? 253 00:12:10,580 --> 00:12:12,000 I'm concerned about you. 254 00:12:12,050 --> 00:12:13,630 I'm concerned about you. 255 00:12:16,510 --> 00:12:17,780 Before we begin... 256 00:12:18,480 --> 00:12:21,310 it's important you know we love you and we just want 257 00:12:21,310 --> 00:12:23,560 - to talk to you about... - I am so pissed at you! 258 00:12:24,430 --> 00:12:26,210 Apparently, Violet is going first. 259 00:12:26,890 --> 00:12:29,140 I spent too many years making sure you ate, 260 00:12:29,140 --> 00:12:31,180 putting you to bed, and cleaning vomit off of you. 261 00:12:31,180 --> 00:12:33,570 I am not going through it again. 262 00:12:35,120 --> 00:12:38,110 You do realize you're having a baby, right? 263 00:12:38,930 --> 00:12:41,220 Christy, you're lying about where you are, 264 00:12:41,220 --> 00:12:42,360 you're calling in sick to work, 265 00:12:42,360 --> 00:12:44,630 and now Gabriel says you're buying pot? 266 00:12:45,200 --> 00:12:47,390 I saw you go in the walk-in with Rudy. 267 00:12:47,390 --> 00:12:49,380 You ratted me out to my mother? 268 00:12:49,380 --> 00:12:51,460 What is this, fourth grade? I am fine! 269 00:12:51,460 --> 00:12:53,660 - You're buying drugs. - For my boyfriend! 270 00:12:53,660 --> 00:12:55,330 Okay, so it's eighth grade. 271 00:12:56,240 --> 00:12:58,570 How long before you start buying them for yourself? 272 00:12:58,570 --> 00:12:59,920 I know what I'm doing. 273 00:12:59,920 --> 00:13:02,510 Says the woman who slept with her married boss. 274 00:13:04,840 --> 00:13:07,400 Let's not lose focus. This is about the weed. 275 00:13:10,220 --> 00:13:11,080 Christy... 276 00:13:11,400 --> 00:13:14,440 this David's just gonna drag you down with him. 277 00:13:15,650 --> 00:13:17,100 I see what's going on here. 278 00:13:17,470 --> 00:13:20,230 David and I are happy, and you guys can't handle it. 279 00:13:20,230 --> 00:13:21,520 Don't be ridiculous. 280 00:13:21,520 --> 00:13:23,580 Why don't you take all of this "Concern" 281 00:13:23,580 --> 00:13:25,270 and fix your own damn lives?! 282 00:13:25,330 --> 00:13:26,480 Are you happy? 283 00:13:26,770 --> 00:13:27,970 Are you happy? 284 00:13:28,450 --> 00:13:30,130 I know you're not happy. 285 00:13:31,990 --> 00:13:33,140 I'm happy... 286 00:13:33,490 --> 00:13:34,460 ish. 287 00:13:35,970 --> 00:13:37,420 - I'm out of here. - Christy, wait. 288 00:13:37,430 --> 00:13:38,330 Nope. 289 00:13:38,600 --> 00:13:43,030 And just for the record, this is the crappiest intervention 290 00:13:43,030 --> 00:13:44,740 anyone's ever thrown me! 291 00:13:46,170 --> 00:13:47,730 And I've had a few! 292 00:13:59,510 --> 00:14:01,680 Oh, you've got to be kidding me! 293 00:14:04,590 --> 00:14:05,610 Who's she? 294 00:14:07,500 --> 00:14:09,070 - Alicia. - Alicia. 295 00:14:10,250 --> 00:14:12,120 Maybe I should... go. 296 00:14:12,120 --> 00:14:13,920 Yeah, maybe you should go. 297 00:14:14,760 --> 00:14:16,010 It was nice meeting you. 298 00:14:16,950 --> 00:14:18,510 I can't believe you! 299 00:14:18,510 --> 00:14:20,820 Okay, let's stay calm and talk. 300 00:14:20,820 --> 00:14:21,980 What's there to talk about? 301 00:14:21,980 --> 00:14:24,190 You got your tongue in some slut's mouth! 302 00:14:25,210 --> 00:14:26,770 Just waiting for the elevator. 303 00:14:28,130 --> 00:14:29,320 Let's go inside. 304 00:14:37,630 --> 00:14:39,960 You rat bastard! 305 00:14:40,280 --> 00:14:41,810 You said you loved me. 306 00:14:41,850 --> 00:14:45,230 I said I was falling in love with you. 307 00:14:45,600 --> 00:14:48,730 And in my defense, I was very high. 308 00:14:51,240 --> 00:14:53,560 Well, I was falling in love with you... 309 00:14:54,610 --> 00:14:56,570 and I was stone-cold sober. 310 00:14:58,050 --> 00:14:58,880 You're right. 311 00:14:59,290 --> 00:15:00,170 I'm sorry. 312 00:15:01,050 --> 00:15:03,760 The truth is, Christy, the reason I kissed that woman 313 00:15:03,760 --> 00:15:04,750 is because... 314 00:15:06,760 --> 00:15:08,240 I love you so much. 315 00:15:12,710 --> 00:15:15,430 That's so bad, it's almost good. 316 00:15:16,020 --> 00:15:18,900 My feelings for you are so intense that it scares me. 317 00:15:18,900 --> 00:15:19,960 Scares you? 318 00:15:20,200 --> 00:15:23,060 I put you in front of my family and my job! 319 00:15:23,350 --> 00:15:25,200 I even bought pot for you. 320 00:15:25,280 --> 00:15:26,470 Really? Did you bring it? 321 00:15:29,650 --> 00:15:30,540 Here you go. 322 00:15:31,070 --> 00:15:32,250 Choke on it! 323 00:15:35,020 --> 00:15:37,380 Oh, for God's sakes, take the stairs. 324 00:15:45,940 --> 00:15:48,450 Where the hell is my big-eyed character witness? 325 00:15:49,830 --> 00:15:53,030 My guess? Unspooling a fireman's hose. 326 00:15:54,620 --> 00:15:55,430 What? 327 00:15:55,430 --> 00:15:56,890 She's banging a fireman. 328 00:15:57,860 --> 00:16:00,480 I am going away for a long time. 329 00:16:01,370 --> 00:16:02,290 You know... 330 00:16:03,570 --> 00:16:05,130 it's not too late to run. 331 00:16:06,050 --> 00:16:06,980 You think? 332 00:16:08,200 --> 00:16:10,470 Regina, I can't delay this anymore. 333 00:16:10,470 --> 00:16:12,120 Now it's too late to run. 334 00:16:12,850 --> 00:16:13,860 Oh, dear God, 335 00:16:13,860 --> 00:16:15,650 I prayed it wouldn't come to this. 336 00:16:16,920 --> 00:16:17,790 But... 337 00:16:18,680 --> 00:16:19,590 Sketchy... 338 00:16:20,870 --> 00:16:22,500 will you be my character witness? 339 00:16:24,880 --> 00:16:26,720 I would be honored. 340 00:16:28,450 --> 00:16:30,490 The judge a guy or a girl? 341 00:16:30,510 --> 00:16:31,320 Guy. 342 00:16:32,950 --> 00:16:34,010 I got this. 343 00:16:38,480 --> 00:16:40,890 Your Honor, I'm not gonna candy-coat it. 344 00:16:41,420 --> 00:16:44,220 I've done bad things in my life. 345 00:16:49,290 --> 00:16:52,480 I've bought drugs, sold drugs, a little gun smuggling, 346 00:16:52,480 --> 00:16:54,590 might have dabbled in some human trafficking. 347 00:16:55,730 --> 00:16:58,820 But that doesn't mean I'm not a good person today. 348 00:16:59,240 --> 00:17:01,900 Doesn't mean she's a good character witness, either. 349 00:17:02,830 --> 00:17:04,950 I've sat where Regina Thompkins is sitting. 350 00:17:04,950 --> 00:17:07,220 I know the regret she's feeling, 351 00:17:07,220 --> 00:17:10,790 the shame, because she hurt innocent people. 352 00:17:10,790 --> 00:17:11,940 Yes, you did, Regina. 353 00:17:11,940 --> 00:17:13,640 You hurt them. Don't look away. 354 00:17:17,500 --> 00:17:19,630 But what are we here for, Your Honor... 355 00:17:20,110 --> 00:17:22,700 punishment or redemption? 356 00:17:24,610 --> 00:17:26,440 Okay, I'll say it for you. 357 00:17:27,630 --> 00:17:28,940 Redemption. 358 00:17:29,470 --> 00:17:32,990 Which is why I recommend release with probation, 359 00:17:32,990 --> 00:17:35,680 so Regina can find honest employment 360 00:17:35,680 --> 00:17:37,920 and pay back the money she stole. 361 00:17:38,250 --> 00:17:41,220 You do realize we're talking about $3 million. 362 00:17:41,220 --> 00:17:43,250 Well, they may not get it tomorrow... 363 00:17:44,270 --> 00:17:46,450 but doesn't she deserve a chance? 364 00:17:46,840 --> 00:17:47,930 I don't think so. 365 00:17:49,610 --> 00:17:52,150 So you're just gonna be a douche about this. 366 00:17:52,450 --> 00:17:53,960 I'm here, I'm here. Sorry. 367 00:17:54,110 --> 00:17:56,600 Oh, thank God! Get your skinny ass up there! 368 00:17:58,070 --> 00:17:59,160 Tough crowd. 369 00:17:59,620 --> 00:18:01,910 Hi. Sorry I'm late. 370 00:18:01,910 --> 00:18:04,000 Today has been a total nightmare. 371 00:18:04,040 --> 00:18:05,730 Do I need to, uh, touch a Bible 372 00:18:05,730 --> 00:18:07,670 or say the Pledge of Allegiance or something? 373 00:18:07,680 --> 00:18:09,760 No, no, just state your name 374 00:18:09,760 --> 00:18:11,460 and tell us about the defendant. 375 00:18:11,680 --> 00:18:13,340 Oh, okay. Uh... 376 00:18:13,900 --> 00:18:15,260 Christy Plunkett. 377 00:18:15,640 --> 00:18:19,910 I'm... here to speak on behalf of Regina Thompkins. 378 00:18:21,270 --> 00:18:22,860 Whew! Where to start? 379 00:18:23,450 --> 00:18:25,690 I mean... I love her. 380 00:18:26,320 --> 00:18:27,980 She's a wonderful person. 381 00:18:28,680 --> 00:18:30,560 Sure, she's made some mistakes, 382 00:18:30,560 --> 00:18:33,050 but she's really turned her life around. 383 00:18:33,450 --> 00:18:35,570 She's been sober for six months, and... 384 00:18:35,570 --> 00:18:37,920 let me tell you, that is not an easy thing to do. 385 00:18:38,850 --> 00:18:39,820 Because... 386 00:18:40,090 --> 00:18:41,650 when you get sober, you... 387 00:18:42,190 --> 00:18:43,640 think the fun's over. 388 00:18:44,940 --> 00:18:47,300 Unless you get lucky and meet a guy 389 00:18:47,300 --> 00:18:48,950 who actually makes you feel good, 390 00:18:48,980 --> 00:18:50,840 and then you think, "All right, I'm back!" 391 00:18:51,810 --> 00:18:52,770 But you're not. 392 00:18:58,890 --> 00:18:59,780 Because... 393 00:19:00,910 --> 00:19:02,650 you open your heart up... 394 00:19:03,660 --> 00:19:05,320 to this jerk... 395 00:19:06,480 --> 00:19:09,560 and he turns out to be a big, 396 00:19:09,960 --> 00:19:12,840 drunken, cheating idiot. 397 00:19:13,580 --> 00:19:15,560 Yeah, the sex was great, Your Honor. 398 00:19:17,140 --> 00:19:19,070 But how am I supposed to forgive him? 399 00:19:19,490 --> 00:19:21,590 Once a liar, always a liar! 400 00:19:21,590 --> 00:19:23,920 A leopard cannot change its spots. 401 00:19:28,200 --> 00:19:29,710 Unless, of course, 402 00:19:29,710 --> 00:19:31,680 the leopard is Regina Thompkins. 403 00:19:41,960 --> 00:19:43,920 Is it too late to give back some of that money? 404 00:19:51,090 --> 00:19:53,560 I'm so sorry about the way I acted. 405 00:19:53,700 --> 00:19:54,600 I just thought... 406 00:19:55,520 --> 00:19:57,850 David and I really had something. 407 00:19:57,850 --> 00:19:58,980 I know, baby. 408 00:19:59,230 --> 00:20:01,740 I'm so sorry you had to go through that. 409 00:20:03,120 --> 00:20:04,160 Hello? 410 00:20:04,560 --> 00:20:06,660 Anybody sorry I'm going to jail for four years? 411 00:20:06,660 --> 00:20:08,730 Aw, with good behavior, you'll be out in two. 412 00:20:08,730 --> 00:20:10,660 You could do two years standing on your head. 413 00:20:10,660 --> 00:20:12,510 Or sitting on someone else's. 414 00:20:13,510 --> 00:20:15,620 Here's what you do-- first day in there, 415 00:20:15,670 --> 00:20:17,660 you find the biggest badass in the yard, 416 00:20:17,660 --> 00:20:18,980 hit her with a sock full of nickels 417 00:20:18,980 --> 00:20:22,170 and show everybody there's a new queen bitch in town. 418 00:20:22,670 --> 00:20:24,280 But doesn't that mean sooner or later 419 00:20:24,280 --> 00:20:26,080 someone's gonna whack the crap out of me? 420 00:20:26,540 --> 00:20:28,960 Well, uneasy lies the head that wears the crown. 421 00:20:31,490 --> 00:20:33,360 Anybody else feel like hitting a meeting? 422 00:20:33,620 --> 00:20:34,720 Sounds good to me. 423 00:20:37,810 --> 00:20:40,690 Don't worry, Regina, your box of money is safe with me. 424 00:20:40,690 --> 00:20:42,330 - There's a box of money? - No.