1 00:00:01,413 --> 00:00:04,014 NEWSMAN: Was very sorry for the plane's unauthorized landing 2 00:00:04,039 --> 00:00:06,356 and the death of the Chinese pilot. 3 00:00:06,381 --> 00:00:08,570 The plane left Guam... What are you still doing here? 4 00:00:09,264 --> 00:00:11,906 - What do you mean? - Well, don't you have school? 5 00:00:11,931 --> 00:00:14,620 - Nope. - What about work? 6 00:00:14,622 --> 00:00:16,955 I killed myself studying for the LSATs. 7 00:00:16,957 --> 00:00:18,398 I'm taking a few days off. 8 00:00:18,423 --> 00:00:20,456 So you're just gonna be... 9 00:00:20,835 --> 00:00:22,301 here? 10 00:00:22,429 --> 00:00:23,929 That's the plan. 11 00:00:23,931 --> 00:00:25,130 Huh. 12 00:00:25,132 --> 00:00:26,799 What's she doing home? 13 00:00:27,606 --> 00:00:29,155 She's taking a few days off. 14 00:00:29,180 --> 00:00:32,117 So she's just gonna be... here? 15 00:00:33,474 --> 00:00:35,648 Am I really that big of a monkey wrench? 16 00:00:35,673 --> 00:00:38,423 No, don't be silly. Listen, I'm gonna split. 17 00:00:39,726 --> 00:00:42,958 Sorry, honey. I'm as blindsided as you are. 18 00:00:43,187 --> 00:00:45,284 Adam, I didn't mean to chase you out. 19 00:00:45,286 --> 00:00:48,153 Oh, no, it's not about you, Christy. Call me if she leaves. 20 00:00:50,559 --> 00:00:52,539 What the hell goes on here when I'm gone? 21 00:00:52,564 --> 00:00:53,843 Don't ask the question 22 00:00:53,868 --> 00:00:55,437 if you don't want to picture the answer. 23 00:00:57,139 --> 00:00:59,865 I watch The View at 11:00. Is that gonna be a problem? 24 00:00:59,990 --> 00:01:01,216 Can I watch with you? 25 00:01:01,218 --> 00:01:02,835 - (groans) - (knocking) 26 00:01:02,837 --> 00:01:05,003 Geez. Now there's someone at the door? 27 00:01:05,005 --> 00:01:06,217 This day is a disaster. 28 00:01:08,451 --> 00:01:09,506 Yeah? 29 00:01:09,531 --> 00:01:11,844 I'm sorry to bother you. Are you the building manager? 30 00:01:11,846 --> 00:01:14,170 - Maybe. You a cop? - Do I look like a cop? 31 00:01:14,195 --> 00:01:15,912 The good ones don't. 32 00:01:16,150 --> 00:01:18,150 Well, actually, I saw the vacancy sign out front, 33 00:01:18,152 --> 00:01:19,418 and I'm interested in the apartment. 34 00:01:19,420 --> 00:01:20,853 Oh, great. Two bedroom, two bath, 35 00:01:20,855 --> 00:01:22,357 first and last, you know the drill. 36 00:01:22,382 --> 00:01:23,848 Can you be any more specific? 37 00:01:23,873 --> 00:01:26,396 Uh, square footage, building amenities? 38 00:01:26,421 --> 00:01:28,588 Square footage, I would say medium. 39 00:01:29,592 --> 00:01:31,090 And, uh, as for amenities, 40 00:01:31,115 --> 00:01:32,779 there's a weird guy on the third floor 41 00:01:32,804 --> 00:01:34,389 who'll rub your feet if you let him. 42 00:01:34,414 --> 00:01:36,201 I have a dog. Is that okay? 43 00:01:36,226 --> 00:01:37,976 The building owner doesn't allow pets, 44 00:01:38,001 --> 00:01:41,135 but if you slip me 50 bucks, we never had this conversation. 45 00:01:41,583 --> 00:01:43,896 - So it'll be our little secret? - What? Who? 46 00:01:44,040 --> 00:01:46,326 See? That's what your $50 buys. 47 00:01:46,907 --> 00:01:48,524 Well, this has been fun. 48 00:01:48,549 --> 00:01:50,209 I'm Rita Gennaro, 49 00:01:50,300 --> 00:01:52,131 the new owner of this building, 50 00:01:52,156 --> 00:01:54,834 and we are off to a very poor start. 51 00:01:56,041 --> 00:01:58,458 Uh-huh. Uh-huh. 52 00:02:00,041 --> 00:02:02,542 - What is wrong with you? - I don't know. I panicked. 53 00:02:02,567 --> 00:02:04,224 You threw my whole day off. 54 00:02:12,737 --> 00:02:16,709 -- Synced and corrected by ChrisKe -- -- www.addic7ed.com -- 55 00:02:20,959 --> 00:02:24,092 Here you go. If it's not how you like it, 56 00:02:24,117 --> 00:02:26,693 I'll make a new pot. Please don't fire my mother. 57 00:02:26,797 --> 00:02:28,496 You're sweet. We'll see. 58 00:02:30,006 --> 00:02:32,423 So, how'd you end up owning the building? 59 00:02:32,448 --> 00:02:34,448 What happened to Tony, who I never saw 60 00:02:34,450 --> 00:02:36,404 except when he brought me my Christmas bonus? 61 00:02:36,429 --> 00:02:38,796 My husband ran off with a home-wrecking slut. 62 00:02:38,821 --> 00:02:41,015 Oh, no. Well, does that mean 63 00:02:41,040 --> 00:02:42,959 you'll be bringing me my Christmas bonus? 64 00:02:44,147 --> 00:02:45,887 You know, I'm divorced, too, 65 00:02:45,912 --> 00:02:47,565 so I know what you're wrestling with. 66 00:02:47,567 --> 00:02:49,210 Do I care about your life? 67 00:02:50,076 --> 00:02:52,653 Nope. No, you don't, and you shouldn't. 68 00:02:52,881 --> 00:02:56,615 So, what went down with Tony, whose toupee is no secret? 69 00:03:03,279 --> 00:03:04,949 He woke up one day and told me, 70 00:03:04,951 --> 00:03:06,667 "I'm leaving you for the dry cleaner." 71 00:03:07,053 --> 00:03:08,786 I just thought he was announcing his errands 72 00:03:08,788 --> 00:03:10,639 in a very formal way. 73 00:03:11,537 --> 00:03:13,341 And then my world fell apart. 74 00:03:13,599 --> 00:03:14,935 Your dry cleaner is a woman? 75 00:03:15,264 --> 00:03:17,511 That's the interesting part of the story for you? 76 00:03:18,068 --> 00:03:19,847 You just don't see it that often. 77 00:03:20,209 --> 00:03:21,996 It's like a kindergarten teacher who's a man. 78 00:03:22,021 --> 00:03:23,317 Not wrong, just weird. 79 00:03:23,342 --> 00:03:25,691 Do you get money from the state to keep her? 80 00:03:27,170 --> 00:03:28,744 I should, shouldn't I? 81 00:03:28,974 --> 00:03:30,512 Well, Rita, this has been a treat. 82 00:03:30,537 --> 00:03:32,410 Definitely pop in every couple of months. 83 00:03:32,435 --> 00:03:33,616 We'd love to see you. 84 00:03:33,618 --> 00:03:35,835 - I'm not done. - And she's not done. 85 00:03:36,521 --> 00:03:38,720 I want this building to generate income, 86 00:03:38,752 --> 00:03:40,746 and if we clean it up, I can raise the rent. 87 00:03:41,576 --> 00:03:44,114 I could understand if he left me for some hot young thing, 88 00:03:44,139 --> 00:03:45,522 but she's a tubby seamstress 89 00:03:45,524 --> 00:03:47,641 with a mole the size of Coney Island. 90 00:03:47,843 --> 00:03:49,309 So sorry you're going through 91 00:03:49,334 --> 00:03:50,727 - such a... - Are we friends all of a sudden? 92 00:03:50,729 --> 00:03:53,303 - Well, I thought we shared a moment. - We didn't. 93 00:03:54,266 --> 00:03:56,934 Now, I got a list of things I need you to take care of. 94 00:03:57,069 --> 00:03:59,235 Yikes. Both sides, huh? (Chuckles) 95 00:03:59,237 --> 00:04:01,185 Can I hire someone to do this work? 96 00:04:01,210 --> 00:04:03,779 - I already did hire someone. - Oh, great. 97 00:04:05,410 --> 00:04:06,795 Oh. 98 00:04:08,139 --> 00:04:10,584 I'll be back Friday to check on the progress. 99 00:04:10,609 --> 00:04:12,474 Or you could go on a long cruise. 100 00:04:12,499 --> 00:04:14,749 Lot of people get a second chance of love on those things. 101 00:04:14,774 --> 00:04:16,756 - Friday! - Cruise! 102 00:04:19,848 --> 00:04:22,139 Let me show you what I think about this list. 103 00:04:23,873 --> 00:04:25,679 What is the matter with you? 104 00:04:25,681 --> 00:04:27,814 If she fires you, we lose our home. 105 00:04:27,816 --> 00:04:30,350 - (ringtone plays) - Hold that thought. 106 00:04:30,352 --> 00:04:31,935 Hi, honey. 107 00:04:33,572 --> 00:04:35,670 Yeah, she's still here. 108 00:04:44,021 --> 00:04:45,248 Oh, my God. 109 00:04:45,250 --> 00:04:46,916 Are you actually working on the list? 110 00:04:46,918 --> 00:04:48,501 Yeah. I got to thinking 111 00:04:48,503 --> 00:04:50,086 if I do one or two of the easy ones, 112 00:04:50,088 --> 00:04:51,740 it'll get her off of my ass for a while. 113 00:04:52,147 --> 00:04:53,567 Is that duct tape? 114 00:04:53,592 --> 00:04:55,375 Hey, I've never used a hammer here. 115 00:04:55,377 --> 00:04:57,107 I'm not gonna break my streak now. 116 00:04:58,880 --> 00:05:00,513 Well, at least I have 117 00:05:00,515 --> 00:05:02,804 a nice, new car to live in. 118 00:05:03,372 --> 00:05:04,624 Come on, baby. 119 00:05:05,071 --> 00:05:06,530 Just till Friday. 120 00:05:10,058 --> 00:05:11,641 Hey, watch your step, Mr. Munson. 121 00:05:11,643 --> 00:05:13,059 I'm on a ladder over here. 122 00:05:13,061 --> 00:05:15,843 Let me guess, you're finally hanging yourself? 123 00:05:18,686 --> 00:05:20,150 Not yet. 124 00:05:20,152 --> 00:05:22,736 I'm doing repairs around the building. 125 00:05:22,738 --> 00:05:25,372 I figured you'd hang yourself before you did that. 126 00:05:26,110 --> 00:05:27,524 Ha-ha-ha. Hmm. 127 00:05:27,549 --> 00:05:30,076 I'm coming up in a couple hours to install your smoke detector, 128 00:05:30,078 --> 00:05:31,494 so make sure you're wearing pants. 129 00:05:31,637 --> 00:05:33,649 I could say the same thing to you. 130 00:05:42,352 --> 00:05:44,307 Get ready, Match.com. 131 00:05:44,309 --> 00:05:47,405 - (knock at door) - (camera clicks) 132 00:05:48,764 --> 00:05:51,347 Whoa, that's a lot of nose. 133 00:05:55,208 --> 00:05:56,936 Rita, hi. 134 00:05:56,938 --> 00:05:59,169 Oh, look who's a girl. 135 00:06:00,443 --> 00:06:02,942 Yeah, I'm just trying to take a picture 136 00:06:02,944 --> 00:06:04,277 for a dating site. 137 00:06:04,279 --> 00:06:05,995 I found my son doing that same thing. 138 00:06:05,997 --> 00:06:08,052 His makeup was more subtle. 139 00:06:09,068 --> 00:06:11,284 Well, I recently broke up with someone, 140 00:06:11,286 --> 00:06:13,536 so, you know, I'm trying to get back out there and... 141 00:06:13,538 --> 00:06:15,036 We're not bonding here. 142 00:06:16,425 --> 00:06:18,291 I found another leak in the laundry room. 143 00:06:18,293 --> 00:06:20,343 The banister on the back staircase is loose. 144 00:06:20,345 --> 00:06:21,678 Why aren't you writing this down? 145 00:06:22,571 --> 00:06:23,903 Okay. 146 00:06:25,794 --> 00:06:29,018 Leak, banister. 147 00:06:29,020 --> 00:06:30,470 Anything else? 148 00:06:30,472 --> 00:06:32,403 Would I keep it a secret? 149 00:06:33,521 --> 00:06:34,808 Right. 150 00:06:34,810 --> 00:06:36,825 Hey, listen, um, 151 00:06:36,850 --> 00:06:39,479 I know this is a little weird, but since you're here, 152 00:06:39,481 --> 00:06:41,314 could you help me get a picture? 153 00:06:41,316 --> 00:06:44,211 My arms aren't long enough to make my nose look normal. 154 00:06:45,085 --> 00:06:48,204 Okay. I want to look pretty, but not slutty. 155 00:06:48,206 --> 00:06:49,989 Available, but not desperate. 156 00:06:49,991 --> 00:06:51,825 - Smart, but not... - There. 157 00:06:53,015 --> 00:06:54,499 But I wasn't quite... 158 00:06:55,380 --> 00:06:57,664 Wow, that's perfect. 159 00:06:57,666 --> 00:06:59,132 I hope you find someone quickly 160 00:06:59,134 --> 00:07:00,667 because at the rate your mother's going, 161 00:07:00,669 --> 00:07:03,002 you're going to need to find a new place to live. 162 00:07:03,004 --> 00:07:05,672 No, no, no, no, she is trying so hard. 163 00:07:05,674 --> 00:07:07,226 She really does love this job. 164 00:07:07,251 --> 00:07:08,808 And my husband loved me. 165 00:07:08,810 --> 00:07:10,343 Things change. 166 00:07:12,217 --> 00:07:13,646 Tell your mother 167 00:07:13,648 --> 00:07:16,349 if she doesn't complete the repairs in three days, 168 00:07:16,351 --> 00:07:17,433 she's out. 169 00:07:17,835 --> 00:07:19,352 But if you kick her out, 170 00:07:19,354 --> 00:07:21,020 you're gonna have to kick me out. 171 00:07:21,272 --> 00:07:23,884 Maybe the new building manager can let you live with them. 172 00:07:23,909 --> 00:07:26,503 You could be like the cat that comes with the apartment. 173 00:07:26,741 --> 00:07:29,496 No, no, she's gonna do it. You'll see. 174 00:07:29,498 --> 00:07:32,163 She's not nearly as incompetent as you might think. 175 00:07:35,036 --> 00:07:36,335 Was that the light? 176 00:07:37,088 --> 00:07:38,725 I'm adding it to the list. 177 00:07:40,842 --> 00:07:42,041 Oh! 178 00:07:43,778 --> 00:07:44,978 Is she gone? 179 00:07:44,980 --> 00:07:46,346 Where'd you come from? 180 00:07:46,348 --> 00:07:48,515 I saw her car out front, so I snuck around back. 181 00:07:48,517 --> 00:07:49,798 Corn dog? 182 00:07:52,087 --> 00:07:53,553 Ah, look at this. 183 00:07:53,852 --> 00:07:56,829 "Take pictures of work when you're finished and send to me"? 184 00:07:57,079 --> 00:07:58,892 Who does she think she is? 185 00:07:58,894 --> 00:08:01,027 I got your first picture right here. 186 00:08:01,029 --> 00:08:03,479 - Mom. - Oh, right. 187 00:08:03,481 --> 00:08:05,079 - Whoa! - No! No! 188 00:08:05,104 --> 00:08:07,521 Oh. You mean don't do it. 189 00:08:08,904 --> 00:08:10,890 Sorry, Bonnie, but I'm with Rita. 190 00:08:10,915 --> 00:08:12,405 If I don't crack the whip with my staff, 191 00:08:12,407 --> 00:08:14,324 my swans will never get fed. 192 00:08:14,326 --> 00:08:17,680 Oh, you and your relatable problems. 193 00:08:18,079 --> 00:08:20,914 You've been managing this building for four years. 194 00:08:20,916 --> 00:08:23,917 You know the job. Why are you fighting so hard against it? 195 00:08:23,919 --> 00:08:26,753 Oh, look who's found something to sink her dentures into. 196 00:08:27,087 --> 00:08:29,274 And I already ordered, so I can't leave. 197 00:08:29,299 --> 00:08:31,224 Why are you sweating about this? 198 00:08:31,226 --> 00:08:33,092 Just do your job. 199 00:08:33,094 --> 00:08:35,594 Says the woman whose only job is shopping. 200 00:08:35,619 --> 00:08:37,347 Hey, I am at those stores 201 00:08:37,349 --> 00:08:39,349 every morning at 10:00 a.m. when they open up. 202 00:08:40,375 --> 00:08:42,175 I would've fired you days ago. 203 00:08:42,200 --> 00:08:43,946 I would've fired her years ago. 204 00:08:43,989 --> 00:08:45,932 I would've never hired her in the first place. 205 00:08:45,957 --> 00:08:48,018 You know what, I don't have to sit here and listen to this. 206 00:08:48,043 --> 00:08:51,776 Screw you all. Waitress, I'd like my taco bowl in the bathroom. 207 00:08:55,820 --> 00:08:57,768 (exhales) 208 00:08:59,516 --> 00:09:01,542 Well, this was not a good plan. 209 00:09:03,745 --> 00:09:05,792 - Bonnie... - No. 210 00:09:07,095 --> 00:09:10,179 Why do I keep locking myself into smaller spaces? 211 00:09:10,181 --> 00:09:11,881 Go away! 212 00:09:11,883 --> 00:09:14,100 I'm not going anywhere. 213 00:09:14,102 --> 00:09:16,102 Well, then I guess I live here now. 214 00:09:16,104 --> 00:09:17,720 What are you doing, Bonnie? 215 00:09:17,722 --> 00:09:19,472 Oh, don't go all Marjorie on me please. 216 00:09:19,474 --> 00:09:20,723 I hate my boss. 217 00:09:20,725 --> 00:09:22,358 There's no underlying blah, blah, blah. 218 00:09:22,360 --> 00:09:24,954 Oh, there's always underlying blah, blah, blah. 219 00:09:24,979 --> 00:09:28,231 - Are you trying to blow up your life? - No! 220 00:09:28,233 --> 00:09:30,283 Okay, let's play a game. 221 00:09:30,285 --> 00:09:31,878 - Pretend I'm your boss. - Good-bye. 222 00:09:32,518 --> 00:09:34,821 That job puts a roof over your head. 223 00:09:34,823 --> 00:09:36,906 Why are you so resistant to doing it? 224 00:09:37,346 --> 00:09:38,741 Because I hate it! 225 00:09:38,743 --> 00:09:40,126 It's humiliating! 226 00:09:40,128 --> 00:09:41,911 I'm in my 50s, and I'm plunging toilets. 227 00:09:41,913 --> 00:09:44,881 - This was not the dream, Marge. - Okay, what is the dream? 228 00:09:44,883 --> 00:09:46,499 Well, I don't know, but it doesn't involve 229 00:09:46,501 --> 00:09:48,668 chasing raccoons out of a garbage closet. 230 00:09:48,670 --> 00:09:50,169 But that is the job. 231 00:09:50,171 --> 00:09:51,671 Right. And if I do it well, 232 00:09:51,673 --> 00:09:53,081 then I'll be doing it for the rest of my life, 233 00:09:53,106 --> 00:09:55,391 and then that's just who I am. 234 00:09:55,393 --> 00:09:57,176 (exhales) Damn it, 235 00:09:57,178 --> 00:09:59,589 we just found the underlying blah, blah, blah. 236 00:10:00,765 --> 00:10:03,149 Look, you might not be doing what you want to 237 00:10:03,151 --> 00:10:05,003 with your life, but that's not Rita's fault. 238 00:10:05,028 --> 00:10:06,853 (scoffs) Shut up. 239 00:10:07,315 --> 00:10:09,939 Bonnie, the job isn't who you are. 240 00:10:09,941 --> 00:10:11,157 It's just what you're doing 241 00:10:11,159 --> 00:10:12,775 on the road to what you're gonna be. 242 00:10:12,777 --> 00:10:14,674 (sighs) I said shut up. 243 00:10:16,698 --> 00:10:18,799 Did you actually want this in here? 244 00:10:20,929 --> 00:10:23,331 No fork? What am I, an animal? 245 00:10:27,823 --> 00:10:29,393 Got to say, these things are a lot easier 246 00:10:29,418 --> 00:10:31,456 to drag without a body inside. 247 00:10:35,464 --> 00:10:37,180 Adam, what the hell are you doing? 248 00:10:37,182 --> 00:10:38,581 Fixing the fountain. 249 00:10:38,606 --> 00:10:40,866 All I said was clean out the leaves. 250 00:10:40,891 --> 00:10:43,392 I told you above and beyond makes her mad. 251 00:10:44,362 --> 00:10:46,034 I just think if this was level 252 00:10:46,059 --> 00:10:47,225 and the tubing was replaced, 253 00:10:47,250 --> 00:10:48,276 that I could get it working again. 254 00:10:48,301 --> 00:10:49,884 You could even have fish in here. 255 00:10:50,101 --> 00:10:52,485 Fish? She barely kept me alive. 256 00:10:53,323 --> 00:10:55,032 What will you talk about 257 00:10:55,034 --> 00:10:56,815 when you finally forgive me for the past? 258 00:10:56,840 --> 00:10:59,006 I'm not overly concerned. 259 00:10:59,831 --> 00:11:01,612 Just shove that thing back on the wall. 260 00:11:01,637 --> 00:11:02,969 Hey, you know, don't ask for my help 261 00:11:02,994 --> 00:11:04,661 if you don't want the job done right. 262 00:11:05,713 --> 00:11:07,221 Oh, God, Rita's coming. 263 00:11:07,246 --> 00:11:08,378 How do you know? 264 00:11:08,380 --> 00:11:10,440 All the birds just flew out of that tree. 265 00:11:11,699 --> 00:11:16,533 Rita, hi. What a lovely giant flower sweater. 266 00:11:20,592 --> 00:11:23,370 I thought I made it clear I'm not paying for extra help. 267 00:11:23,402 --> 00:11:26,517 Oh, don't worry, I pay him in sex and her in Doritos. 268 00:11:27,399 --> 00:11:29,776 Cool Ranch, family size. 269 00:11:30,401 --> 00:11:32,851 So you two are together? 270 00:11:32,876 --> 00:11:34,435 Yes, this is Adam, my fiancé. 271 00:11:34,460 --> 00:11:36,460 - Hi, good to meet you... - Let me see the ring. 272 00:11:36,671 --> 00:11:40,468 Nice. Just be careful where you send his shirts. 273 00:11:41,640 --> 00:11:44,197 Rita, I want to apologize 274 00:11:44,199 --> 00:11:45,726 if I seemed a little resistant 275 00:11:45,751 --> 00:11:49,953 to what... are obviously necessary upgrades to our lovely building. 276 00:11:49,955 --> 00:11:52,124 You are the boss, so what you say goes. 277 00:11:52,156 --> 00:11:53,663 Thank you for understanding 278 00:11:53,688 --> 00:11:57,038 what everyone else who has a job already understands. 279 00:11:57,296 --> 00:11:59,073 (phone chimes) 280 00:11:59,601 --> 00:12:02,296 Oh, my God, I got a match on Match. I matched. 281 00:12:03,117 --> 00:12:04,617 Is it desperate if I call him right now? 282 00:12:04,642 --> 00:12:05,820 I don't, I don't care. 283 00:12:06,466 --> 00:12:09,202 You've done such a wonderful job with her. 284 00:12:09,633 --> 00:12:11,466 Now, I've been looking over the rent receipts 285 00:12:11,468 --> 00:12:14,359 and we have a few tenants that are behind. 286 00:12:14,384 --> 00:12:16,851 Anyone who owes more than two months, 287 00:12:16,940 --> 00:12:19,218 - get the money or evict them. - Not a problem. 288 00:12:19,243 --> 00:12:21,859 I have some experience shaking down people for money. 289 00:12:22,646 --> 00:12:25,452 As part of my extensive... charity work. 290 00:12:26,124 --> 00:12:28,900 Yes, that fits perfectly with everything I know about you. 291 00:12:28,902 --> 00:12:31,999 (chuckles) Funny one, boss. 292 00:12:32,245 --> 00:12:34,718 I'll find out whose bike that is. 293 00:12:38,421 --> 00:12:40,878 Wow, Bonnie, you handled that great. 294 00:12:40,880 --> 00:12:43,381 Oh, good, you're impressed. What the hell do I care? 295 00:12:43,383 --> 00:12:46,501 - Why are you snapping at me? - Because I can't snap at her. 296 00:12:46,503 --> 00:12:48,585 I love you, you're sweet. 297 00:12:49,305 --> 00:12:50,505 CHRISTY: Hey. 298 00:12:50,507 --> 00:12:52,473 Quick question, am I desperate enough 299 00:12:52,475 --> 00:12:54,509 to have frozen yogurt with a magician? 300 00:12:55,428 --> 00:12:56,695 I don't care. 301 00:12:57,147 --> 00:12:59,796 Hi, Mr. Mysterio, it's a go. 302 00:13:03,696 --> 00:13:07,415 Three months? I thought I was only two months behind. 303 00:13:07,440 --> 00:13:08,856 Sorry to bring it up, 304 00:13:09,367 --> 00:13:11,429 it's just the new owner is kind of cracking down. 305 00:13:12,598 --> 00:13:14,890 So... where do you hide the cash? 306 00:13:16,116 --> 00:13:18,820 Cereal box? Cookie jar? 307 00:13:19,085 --> 00:13:21,335 Stuffed inside a frozen chicken? 308 00:13:21,337 --> 00:13:24,041 Thieves never look inside a chicken. 309 00:13:24,874 --> 00:13:26,207 You know what, I'm out of checks. 310 00:13:26,209 --> 00:13:27,759 How 'bout I get it to you later this week? 311 00:13:27,784 --> 00:13:29,334 I kind of need it now. 312 00:13:29,658 --> 00:13:31,045 I could drive you to the bank. 313 00:13:31,861 --> 00:13:33,358 I don't have it, Bonnie. 314 00:13:33,939 --> 00:13:35,610 You mean like on the level you don't have it? 315 00:13:35,830 --> 00:13:38,650 I don't know if you're looking at me, but I'm shaking my head. 316 00:13:39,022 --> 00:13:40,521 You've lived here for a hundred years, 317 00:13:40,523 --> 00:13:41,939 you're never late with the rent. 318 00:13:42,447 --> 00:13:44,225 Hang on, you just put two of the big ones 319 00:13:44,227 --> 00:13:46,060 in the Thursday slot. Is that right? 320 00:13:46,291 --> 00:13:48,392 It is if I want to sleep till Sunday. 321 00:13:49,377 --> 00:13:51,783 - Let me do this. - Yeah. 322 00:13:51,785 --> 00:13:54,569 - One in each? - Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, thanks. 323 00:13:54,571 --> 00:13:57,739 I'm not, uh, concentrating too good right now. 324 00:13:57,741 --> 00:13:59,048 So what's going on? 325 00:13:59,267 --> 00:14:02,266 Well, a couple of months ago, I got diagnosed with, uh, 326 00:14:02,291 --> 00:14:03,795 prostate cancer. 327 00:14:03,797 --> 00:14:04,996 They found it early, 328 00:14:04,998 --> 00:14:06,611 but they put me on a couple of medications 329 00:14:06,636 --> 00:14:08,549 the VA doesn't cover, so... 330 00:14:08,551 --> 00:14:09,967 You can't pay your rent. 331 00:14:09,969 --> 00:14:12,806 Oh, I could pay it, but then I'd have a whole lot of cancer. 332 00:14:15,228 --> 00:14:16,390 Sorry. 333 00:14:17,127 --> 00:14:21,562 These ones are... Monday, Wednesday, and-and Friday. 334 00:14:22,791 --> 00:14:24,609 There's got to be something you can do. 335 00:14:24,634 --> 00:14:28,025 Well, I've been trying to avoid the building manager, 336 00:14:28,625 --> 00:14:30,478 but here you are. 337 00:14:35,779 --> 00:14:37,278 Son of a bitch. 338 00:14:37,280 --> 00:14:38,780 - We just took a break. - It's been two minutes. 339 00:14:38,782 --> 00:14:41,449 - Not you. Munson. - Who's Munson? 340 00:14:41,587 --> 00:14:44,786 - Blind guy who lives upstairs. - Oh, I like him. 341 00:14:45,150 --> 00:14:47,088 One day we were hanging out in front of the building, 342 00:14:47,324 --> 00:14:49,884 we made five bucks for doing nothing. 343 00:14:52,783 --> 00:14:54,712 You guys should go out there till he makes his rent 344 00:14:54,714 --> 00:14:56,130 'cause he's three months behind. 345 00:14:56,447 --> 00:14:57,515 And he won't pay? 346 00:14:57,517 --> 00:15:00,312 He can't. I'm not evicting a blind veteran who has cancer. 347 00:15:00,337 --> 00:15:02,603 - I'm not doing it. - He's got cancer? 348 00:15:02,605 --> 00:15:04,472 Prostate. And you're getting a full physical, mister, 349 00:15:04,474 --> 00:15:05,857 including the finger thing. 350 00:15:06,961 --> 00:15:09,900 And don't pinch up, they got to really look around. 351 00:15:13,806 --> 00:15:17,118 Anyway, Munson can't afford his meds and rent. 352 00:15:17,120 --> 00:15:19,153 He's got no family, no support system. 353 00:15:19,744 --> 00:15:20,711 What are you gonna do? 354 00:15:20,736 --> 00:15:22,467 I'm gonna try to talk some sense into Rita. 355 00:15:22,994 --> 00:15:25,376 Calmly and rationally? Please? 356 00:15:25,378 --> 00:15:27,378 Look, I made peace with the fact that eating crap 357 00:15:27,380 --> 00:15:30,081 is part of my job, but this is where I draw the line. 358 00:15:30,502 --> 00:15:32,923 Yeah, that's right, I draw a line sometimes. 359 00:15:36,611 --> 00:15:39,908 See, now, that didn't sound calm and rational. 360 00:15:40,009 --> 00:15:42,787 That sounded hot and "we get kicked out-y." 361 00:15:43,494 --> 00:15:45,179 You're right, you're right. 362 00:15:45,181 --> 00:15:47,849 It just burns me up that-that rich people like Rita 363 00:15:47,851 --> 00:15:50,518 run everything and people like us and Munson get screwed. 364 00:15:52,307 --> 00:15:54,856 I did stunts on a movie like this one time. 365 00:15:56,112 --> 00:15:58,229 It was called Ski Academy. 366 00:15:59,062 --> 00:16:03,174 The rich kids wouldn't let the poor kids be on the ski patrol. 367 00:16:03,199 --> 00:16:05,700 The poor kids turned off the power to the lift, 368 00:16:05,702 --> 00:16:08,002 so the rich kids got stuck. 369 00:16:15,323 --> 00:16:20,026 Anyway, I got it on VHS if anybody wants to see it. 370 00:16:22,998 --> 00:16:24,185 Here we are. 371 00:16:24,187 --> 00:16:26,053 I've got two kinds of cookies, some cheese, 372 00:16:26,055 --> 00:16:27,722 and a rogue chicken nugget. 373 00:16:28,686 --> 00:16:30,474 Can I get you anything else or are you good? 374 00:16:30,476 --> 00:16:32,526 I'm swaddled in luxury. 375 00:16:33,467 --> 00:16:35,229 Now why am I here? 376 00:16:35,231 --> 00:16:36,647 Here's the thing. (Clears throat) 377 00:16:36,649 --> 00:16:40,284 One of the tenants you asked me to evict is Mr. Munson in 2G. 378 00:16:40,286 --> 00:16:43,070 He's a blind Vietnam vet who's now facing a health crisis. 379 00:16:43,072 --> 00:16:44,538 And while you're the boss, 380 00:16:44,540 --> 00:16:45,873 and I'm on board with that, 381 00:16:45,875 --> 00:16:50,077 I got to respectfully say... can we talk about this a second? 382 00:16:50,079 --> 00:16:53,247 No. I can't afford to know these people as people. 383 00:16:53,249 --> 00:16:55,883 - I'm running a business here. - But they are people. 384 00:16:55,885 --> 00:16:59,754 If I make an exception for every sad story, where does it end? 385 00:17:00,205 --> 00:17:02,006 Have you looked at this building? 386 00:17:02,008 --> 00:17:04,342 If you live here, you have a sad story. 387 00:17:05,428 --> 00:17:07,399 And now I rely on this building 388 00:17:07,424 --> 00:17:09,182 to survive. That's my sad story. 389 00:17:09,682 --> 00:17:13,721 We are this close to having a working fountain. 390 00:17:15,236 --> 00:17:16,771 I'm done talking. 391 00:17:16,773 --> 00:17:19,323 Evict him, or I'll find somebody who will. 392 00:17:19,325 --> 00:17:20,858 Well, then... 393 00:17:22,463 --> 00:17:23,945 I quit. 394 00:17:25,331 --> 00:17:27,915 I may hate my job, but I don't have to hate myself. 395 00:17:27,917 --> 00:17:30,701 And by the way, whatever part of you 396 00:17:30,703 --> 00:17:33,037 that's comfortable throwing a blind man out on the street 397 00:17:33,039 --> 00:17:35,873 is maybe the part your husband ran screaming from. 398 00:17:37,371 --> 00:17:40,211 I'm sorry, I know this screws us, but I just couldn't do it. 399 00:17:40,213 --> 00:17:42,113 No, no, no, don't be sorry. 400 00:17:42,138 --> 00:17:45,954 I'm so glad you didn't let her turn you into a horrible person. 401 00:17:46,302 --> 00:17:48,532 Well, back into one. 402 00:17:50,260 --> 00:17:52,844 And maybe we end up crashing at Adam's for a while. 403 00:17:52,869 --> 00:17:54,118 Totally. 404 00:17:54,277 --> 00:17:55,939 Sure. 405 00:17:57,197 --> 00:17:59,197 I'm not heartless. 406 00:17:59,699 --> 00:18:01,743 I just don't know what the hell I'm doing. 407 00:18:01,986 --> 00:18:04,306 I'm alone, I'm scared. 408 00:18:04,500 --> 00:18:07,084 I haven't worked in 32 years, 409 00:18:07,109 --> 00:18:09,486 and now I got to run this crap-box. 410 00:18:10,562 --> 00:18:13,780 I mean, is this who I am now? 411 00:18:13,993 --> 00:18:16,775 No, no, it's not who you are. 412 00:18:16,800 --> 00:18:20,217 It's just what you're doing on the road to who you're gonna be. 413 00:18:21,212 --> 00:18:22,636 What? 414 00:18:22,638 --> 00:18:27,058 Okay, your husband left you, but that's not Mr. Munson's fault. 415 00:18:27,060 --> 00:18:28,642 Just like it's not your fault 416 00:18:28,644 --> 00:18:30,678 that I'm not doing what I want to do. 417 00:18:32,100 --> 00:18:34,173 It made sense in the bathroom. 418 00:18:34,986 --> 00:18:39,312 Look, two strong, smart women like us 419 00:18:39,337 --> 00:18:41,796 can put our heads together and come up with a reasonable plan 420 00:18:41,821 --> 00:18:43,601 where you get the rent you so richly deserve 421 00:18:43,626 --> 00:18:45,326 and he gets to keep his apartment. 422 00:18:46,618 --> 00:18:48,195 I'd be open to that. 423 00:18:48,673 --> 00:18:51,281 - Thank you. - I'm not a monster. 424 00:18:51,306 --> 00:18:52,950 Though there is a kid on the third floor 425 00:18:52,952 --> 00:18:54,418 with a bunny that needs to go. 426 00:18:54,420 --> 00:18:55,619 You got it, the kid's out of here. 427 00:18:55,621 --> 00:18:57,603 - I meant the bunny. - Better. 428 00:18:58,374 --> 00:19:01,962 This is working out a lot like Ski Academy. 429 00:19:08,045 --> 00:19:09,628 The discount card we found in the mail 430 00:19:09,630 --> 00:19:11,513 actually did work for your prescription. Mm. 431 00:19:11,515 --> 00:19:14,865 The GoFundMe page is... hanging in there. 432 00:19:16,099 --> 00:19:18,220 It might've helped if you hadn't paraded around the building 433 00:19:18,222 --> 00:19:20,239 wearing a "No Fat Chicks" T-shirt. 434 00:19:20,630 --> 00:19:24,302 Well, how the hell am I supposed to know what my T-shirts say? 435 00:19:24,990 --> 00:19:28,177 And for the record, I do like a little meat on the bones. 436 00:19:29,427 --> 00:19:32,401 Well, I'll try and get the word out. 437 00:19:32,403 --> 00:19:35,287 - I'll also help you run errands so you don't have to take a cab. - Mm. 438 00:19:35,289 --> 00:19:38,490 And Rita is willing to let you pay off the back rent over time. 439 00:19:38,515 --> 00:19:42,013 Mm. So this Rita... 440 00:19:42,669 --> 00:19:43,996 is she a good-looking woman? 441 00:19:43,998 --> 00:19:46,740 - Yeah, she's very... - What the hell?! 442 00:19:47,918 --> 00:19:49,918 You didn't tell me the little one was here! 443 00:19:49,920 --> 00:19:51,503 You want to give him a heart attack? 444 00:19:51,505 --> 00:19:53,722 You know he can't afford that. 445 00:19:56,560 --> 00:19:58,343 (water dripping) 446 00:20:01,841 --> 00:20:03,181 Yes! 447 00:20:07,732 --> 00:20:11,365 -- Synced and corrected by ChrisKe -- -- www.addic7ed.com --