1
00:00:02,805 --> 00:00:05,140
Mom, you're going to college now, right?
2
00:00:05,142 --> 00:00:06,775
Yes, I am, sweetie.
3
00:00:06,777 --> 00:00:08,710
Can you take cooking classes there?
4
00:00:10,947 --> 00:00:13,749
I thought you liked my tuna casserole.
5
00:00:13,751 --> 00:00:16,184
It was better when you made it drunk.
6
00:00:18,254 --> 00:00:21,389
Roscoe, I made it when she was drunk.
7
00:00:21,391 --> 00:00:23,291
Oh.
8
00:00:23,293 --> 00:00:24,792
Mystery solved.
9
00:00:26,262 --> 00:00:28,696
Sorry...
10
00:00:28,698 --> 00:00:30,432
You would not believe
11
00:00:30,434 --> 00:00:33,367
what I snaked out of old
lady Gorman's shower drain.
12
00:00:33,369 --> 00:00:34,569
Mom, please. We're eating dinner.
13
00:00:34,571 --> 00:00:36,503
And it's hard enough.
14
00:00:36,505 --> 00:00:38,573
Fine.
15
00:00:40,275 --> 00:00:42,043
A hairball with a human tooth in it.
16
00:00:45,080 --> 00:00:46,313
I'm gonna go do my homework.
17
00:00:46,315 --> 00:00:48,449
Congratulations.
18
00:00:48,451 --> 00:00:51,285
You managed to gross out a boy
who keeps his boogers in a jar.
19
00:00:52,920 --> 00:00:54,154
I need to get going, too.
20
00:00:54,156 --> 00:00:56,356
Where you headed?
21
00:00:56,358 --> 00:00:58,992
I'm going to a birthday party with Gregory.
22
00:00:58,994 --> 00:01:01,528
Oh, Gregory... again.
23
00:01:01,530 --> 00:01:03,464
Wow, that's been going on
a little while now, huh?
24
00:01:03,466 --> 00:01:04,664
I guess.
25
00:01:04,666 --> 00:01:05,932
When do we get to meet him?
26
00:01:05,934 --> 00:01:08,367
Yeah, I'd like to meet young Gregory.
27
00:01:08,369 --> 00:01:11,004
Yeah, I just don't see any reason for that.
28
00:01:11,006 --> 00:01:13,139
Oh, come on!
29
00:01:13,141 --> 00:01:15,341
There's nothing to hide.
30
00:01:15,343 --> 00:01:17,443
Your last boyfriend was
a burger-flipping stoner
31
00:01:17,445 --> 00:01:20,813
who got you pregnant...
The bar is very low.
32
00:01:20,815 --> 00:01:23,216
Why are you so interested in my life?
33
00:01:23,218 --> 00:01:24,783
Are your own lives that boring?
34
00:01:24,785 --> 00:01:26,785
Yes. The most exciting thing
that happened to me today
35
00:01:26,787 --> 00:01:28,821
was a hairball with an overbite.
36
00:01:30,157 --> 00:01:31,324
Come on!
37
00:01:31,326 --> 00:01:32,425
Tell me about him.
38
00:01:32,427 --> 00:01:33,593
I'm a cool mom.
39
00:01:33,595 --> 00:01:35,894
I'm hip, I'm happening.
40
00:01:35,896 --> 00:01:38,497
I got it going on.
41
00:01:38,499 --> 00:01:40,499
How were you ever a stripper?
42
00:01:43,169 --> 00:01:46,639
Some men enjoyed my awkwardness.
43
00:01:46,641 --> 00:01:49,041
Come on, what's the deal with this guy?
44
00:01:49,043 --> 00:01:50,408
Does he have, like, a misshapen head?
45
00:01:50,410 --> 00:01:53,311
Little tiny legs? Lazy eye? Canadian...?
46
00:01:53,313 --> 00:01:55,647
"Canadian"?
47
00:01:55,649 --> 00:01:57,782
That's the border we should be watching.
48
00:01:59,352 --> 00:02:00,818
He's just a guy.
49
00:02:00,820 --> 00:02:02,587
Where'd you meet him? At school.
50
00:02:02,589 --> 00:02:03,589
So, he's a student.
51
00:02:03,590 --> 00:02:04,989
God! What is with you guys?
52
00:02:04,991 --> 00:02:06,625
Just... leave it alone.
53
00:02:06,627 --> 00:02:08,260
He's not a student.
54
00:02:08,262 --> 00:02:09,661
Violet, you know the kind of men
55
00:02:09,663 --> 00:02:11,162
your grandmother and I have dated.
56
00:02:11,164 --> 00:02:12,864
We are the last people
in the world to judge.
57
00:02:12,866 --> 00:02:14,699
Am I right?
- Mm, absolutely.
58
00:02:14,701 --> 00:02:16,768
You cannot shock us.
59
00:02:16,770 --> 00:02:18,036
All right.
60
00:02:18,038 --> 00:02:19,971
He's a professor at my school.
61
00:02:19,973 --> 00:02:22,573
And he's 42 years old.
62
00:02:26,811 --> 00:02:29,446
I'm calling the police.
63
00:02:29,470 --> 00:02:31,470
- Synced and corrected by ChrisKe -
- www.addic7ed.com -
64
00:02:50,986 --> 00:02:52,753
Mom, I'm 19.
65
00:02:52,755 --> 00:02:53,788
No one's doing anything wrong.
66
00:02:53,790 --> 00:02:55,322
Hang up the phone.
67
00:02:55,324 --> 00:02:58,079
Then why were you hiding this from us?
68
00:02:58,104 --> 00:03:00,298
Because I was afraid you
might not handle it well.
69
00:03:00,323 --> 00:03:03,097
Why would you think that?
My little girl is dating
70
00:03:03,099 --> 00:03:04,931
a man who's old enough to be her father.
71
00:03:04,933 --> 00:03:07,334
Why would that upset me?
It's just Jim friggin' Dandy!
72
00:03:08,670 --> 00:03:09,803
Pssst!
73
00:03:09,805 --> 00:03:11,405
You're not handling it well.
74
00:03:13,106 --> 00:03:14,907
I'm out of here.
75
00:03:14,909 --> 00:03:16,342
I don't believe it.
76
00:03:16,344 --> 00:03:18,177
42 years old?
77
00:03:18,179 --> 00:03:21,513
It'd be less weird if
you were dating him.
78
00:03:21,515 --> 00:03:22,981
Look, I haven't seen
him, but if you want me
79
00:03:22,983 --> 00:03:25,083
to take a run at him, I will.
80
00:03:28,187 --> 00:03:29,888
Really not in the mood, Mom.
81
00:03:29,890 --> 00:03:32,190
It could be a lot worse.
Could be one of the losers
82
00:03:32,192 --> 00:03:34,159
you dragged home when you were a teenager.
83
00:03:35,595 --> 00:03:37,728
He's old enough to be one
of the losers I dragged home.
84
00:03:37,730 --> 00:03:39,297
Yeah.
85
00:03:39,299 --> 00:03:41,732
Look, the more a mother fights
a daughter on who she chooses
86
00:03:41,734 --> 00:03:43,868
for a boyfriend, the
more she'll run to him.
87
00:03:43,870 --> 00:03:45,337
How do you know that?
88
00:03:45,339 --> 00:03:48,974
I point to your two children.
89
00:03:48,976 --> 00:03:52,010
And in the spirit of
fairness, I point to you, too.
90
00:03:57,950 --> 00:03:59,851
Oh, God.
91
00:04:01,987 --> 00:04:05,523
Relax. I just wanted to apologize.
92
00:04:05,525 --> 00:04:06,557
Really?
93
00:04:06,559 --> 00:04:08,392
Come here, sit down.
94
00:04:08,394 --> 00:04:09,860
Can we just do this in the morning?
95
00:04:09,862 --> 00:04:11,695
Damn it, Violet, sit down!
96
00:04:12,697 --> 00:04:16,133
Please...?
97
00:04:17,735 --> 00:04:19,303
Listen,
98
00:04:19,305 --> 00:04:22,106
it's natural that I worry
99
00:04:22,108 --> 00:04:25,175
some guy might be taking advantage of you.
100
00:04:25,177 --> 00:04:26,676
Where's the apology?
101
00:04:26,678 --> 00:04:28,512
It's coming.
102
00:04:28,514 --> 00:04:29,746
Better come soon.
103
00:04:29,748 --> 00:04:32,281
One sec.
104
00:04:37,455 --> 00:04:40,323
Anyway...
105
00:04:42,026 --> 00:04:45,161
you and I both know
106
00:04:45,163 --> 00:04:47,163
that I wasn't always there for you,
107
00:04:47,165 --> 00:04:49,265
so you got to forgive me
108
00:04:49,267 --> 00:04:52,301
for being a little overprotective now.
109
00:04:52,303 --> 00:04:54,404
I get it.
- You do?
110
00:04:54,406 --> 00:04:56,272
Gregory explained all this to me.
111
00:04:56,274 --> 00:04:57,873
He's a psychology professor.
112
00:04:57,875 --> 00:05:00,743
He actually did his doctoral
thesis on the damaging effects
113
00:05:00,745 --> 00:05:02,511
of alcoholism on families,
114
00:05:02,513 --> 00:05:05,347
so he gets that part, too.
115
00:05:07,183 --> 00:05:09,552
Well, isn't that just super.
116
00:05:09,554 --> 00:05:13,455
Oh, hey, what are you guys doing up?
117
00:05:13,457 --> 00:05:16,291
Oh, give me a break. I
heard you breathing up there.
118
00:05:16,293 --> 00:05:18,826
Great, then I can jump right in.
119
00:05:18,828 --> 00:05:20,995
Why don't we invite
Gregory over for dinner?
120
00:05:20,997 --> 00:05:23,031
Oh, no. He knows I grew up in the circus,
121
00:05:23,033 --> 00:05:24,933
he doesn't need to meet the clowns.
122
00:05:24,935 --> 00:05:26,834
Honey, I promise,
123
00:05:26,836 --> 00:05:29,003
your mom and I will be
on our best behavior.
124
00:05:29,005 --> 00:05:31,606
We'll make him feel really welcome.
125
00:05:31,608 --> 00:05:34,042
Well, he did say he'd like to meet you.
126
00:05:34,044 --> 00:05:35,610
That's a good sign.
127
00:05:35,612 --> 00:05:37,645
You'll see. He's a terrific guy
128
00:05:37,647 --> 00:05:39,881
and I think he really cares for me.
129
00:05:39,883 --> 00:05:41,716
I'm sure he does.
130
00:05:42,751 --> 00:05:45,519
Which brings up the question:
131
00:05:45,521 --> 00:05:48,089
Where are you in the relationship?
132
00:05:48,091 --> 00:05:51,225
What's that supposed to
mean? Are you plankin' him?
133
00:05:51,227 --> 00:05:53,694
I'm not talking about this with you.
134
00:05:53,696 --> 00:05:55,896
They're plankin'.
135
00:05:55,898 --> 00:05:57,498
I'm going to bed now.
136
00:05:57,500 --> 00:06:00,367
Okay, but we're gonna do the dinner, right?
137
00:06:00,369 --> 00:06:01,635
Depends. Who's cooking?
138
00:06:01,637 --> 00:06:04,071
She'll cook.
- I'll cook.
139
00:06:04,073 --> 00:06:06,873
All right, I'll set it up. Night.
140
00:06:06,875 --> 00:06:08,274
Night.
- Night.
141
00:06:08,276 --> 00:06:09,977
I still never got my apology.
142
00:06:09,979 --> 00:06:12,045
Sorry.
- Too late.
143
00:06:14,716 --> 00:06:16,883
Shall we?
- Ugh.
144
00:06:16,885 --> 00:06:18,819
I can't go to bed after that.
145
00:06:18,821 --> 00:06:20,253
The second I close my eyes
146
00:06:20,255 --> 00:06:21,854
I'll be picturing Richard Dreyfuss
147
00:06:21,856 --> 00:06:24,290
showering with my daughter.
148
00:06:24,292 --> 00:06:26,226
Thanks.
149
00:06:26,228 --> 00:06:28,228
Now I'm not sleeping either.
150
00:06:29,730 --> 00:06:31,197
Ugh.
- Ooh.
151
00:06:33,334 --> 00:06:36,603
Wow, so he's older than me?
- Yup.
152
00:06:36,605 --> 00:06:39,772
Man, I don't know whether
to be disgusted or impressed.
153
00:06:39,774 --> 00:06:41,073
You're disgusted.
154
00:06:41,075 --> 00:06:43,676
I can be both.
155
00:06:43,678 --> 00:06:46,012
Do we have four matching dinner plates?
156
00:06:46,014 --> 00:06:47,113
That's what you're worried about?
157
00:06:47,115 --> 00:06:49,548
Your kids don't have matching fathers.
158
00:06:51,818 --> 00:06:53,653
Mind if I stick around and meet him?
159
00:06:53,655 --> 00:06:54,886
Yeah, actually, I do.
160
00:06:54,888 --> 00:06:56,588
Take the kid that is yours and go.
161
00:06:56,590 --> 00:06:58,690
Whatever.
162
00:06:58,692 --> 00:07:00,725
All right, let's hit it.
163
00:07:02,095 --> 00:07:03,362
Oh...
164
00:07:04,397 --> 00:07:06,598
Hey!
165
00:07:08,034 --> 00:07:10,235
Hey, Baxter. This is Gregory.
166
00:07:10,237 --> 00:07:14,005
Gregory, this is my little
brother Roscoe and Roscoe's dad.
167
00:07:14,007 --> 00:07:16,374
Hi. Hi, nice to meet you.
168
00:07:16,376 --> 00:07:19,077
Nice to meet you, too.
169
00:07:21,747 --> 00:07:24,182
Okay.
170
00:07:24,184 --> 00:07:25,717
We'll be on our way.
171
00:07:25,719 --> 00:07:27,118
Oh,
172
00:07:27,120 --> 00:07:29,420
just a heads up... As
Violet's former stepfather,
173
00:07:29,422 --> 00:07:30,754
I'm keeping my eye on you.
174
00:07:31,590 --> 00:07:33,224
But as a bystanding dude,
175
00:07:33,226 --> 00:07:35,259
I tip my cap.
176
00:07:37,762 --> 00:07:41,265
Let's go. You're not wearing a cap.
177
00:07:41,267 --> 00:07:43,301
Not her usual type.
178
00:07:43,303 --> 00:07:47,004
Looks like her usual type's parole officer.
179
00:07:47,006 --> 00:07:49,773
It's still not too late to run.
180
00:07:49,775 --> 00:07:51,541
I'm fine.
181
00:07:51,543 --> 00:07:52,876
Where can I hang this?
182
00:07:52,878 --> 00:07:54,078
The closet's back there,
183
00:07:54,080 --> 00:07:56,080
but that's where my little brother sleeps.
184
00:07:56,082 --> 00:07:58,448
What?
185
00:07:58,450 --> 00:08:00,783
Welcome, welcome, welcome.
186
00:08:00,785 --> 00:08:03,720
Welcome.
- Welcome.
187
00:08:03,722 --> 00:08:05,722
Yeah, okay.
188
00:08:05,724 --> 00:08:09,158
Mom, Grandma, this is Gregory.
189
00:08:09,160 --> 00:08:11,127
Oh, it is so nice to meet you.
190
00:08:11,129 --> 00:08:12,429
Nice to meet you, too.
191
00:08:12,431 --> 00:08:13,663
Please, sit down.
192
00:08:13,665 --> 00:08:15,932
Thanks. Would you like a glass of wine?
193
00:08:15,934 --> 00:08:18,500
Really? You keep wine in the house?
194
00:08:18,502 --> 00:08:21,137
We don't drink, but we got
a nice Chardonnay for you.
195
00:08:21,139 --> 00:08:22,638
Thanks, I'll have a glass.
196
00:08:22,640 --> 00:08:23,973
Me, too.
197
00:08:23,975 --> 00:08:25,608
Oh, honey, you're not old enough to drink.
198
00:08:25,610 --> 00:08:27,543
She's not old enough to drink.
199
00:08:28,912 --> 00:08:30,613
Why don't I get the booze?
200
00:08:30,615 --> 00:08:32,915
So, uh,
201
00:08:32,917 --> 00:08:35,751
Violet tells us you teach
at the junior college.
202
00:08:35,753 --> 00:08:37,986
Yes, I do. Psychology.
203
00:08:37,988 --> 00:08:40,088
Well, then we have something in common.
204
00:08:40,090 --> 00:08:41,890
I'm a certified life coach.
205
00:08:41,892 --> 00:08:44,693
C... Certified? Oh, that's fabulous,
206
00:08:44,695 --> 00:08:46,295
because, you know, there are so many
207
00:08:46,297 --> 00:08:49,665
fly-by-night life coaches.
208
00:08:49,667 --> 00:08:51,133
Hey, Gregory? You didn't happen
209
00:08:51,135 --> 00:08:53,668
to bring your own corkscrew, did you?
210
00:08:57,306 --> 00:09:00,175
So after my mom had the stroke,
211
00:09:00,177 --> 00:09:02,944
I took a year off of grad
school to take care of her,
212
00:09:02,946 --> 00:09:05,680
which I thought was gonna be hard,
213
00:09:05,682 --> 00:09:07,148
uh, but it turned into this
214
00:09:07,150 --> 00:09:09,684
wonderful experience, because
215
00:09:09,686 --> 00:09:12,119
we got to know each other as adults.
216
00:09:12,121 --> 00:09:13,954
And that was
217
00:09:13,956 --> 00:09:15,890
a priceless gift.
218
00:09:15,892 --> 00:09:17,625
That's beautiful.
219
00:09:17,627 --> 00:09:20,695
She would never do that for me.
220
00:09:20,697 --> 00:09:23,130
She's right.
221
00:09:23,132 --> 00:09:24,765
Well, this was fun.
222
00:09:24,767 --> 00:09:26,333
I'm gonna grab our coats.
223
00:09:26,335 --> 00:09:28,969
Oh, so soon?
224
00:09:28,971 --> 00:09:31,405
You wanted to meet him, you
met him, now say good-bye.
225
00:09:33,041 --> 00:09:34,308
Uh, be right there.
226
00:09:34,310 --> 00:09:37,544
Listen, I just want to say...
227
00:09:37,546 --> 00:09:39,979
I get that you have
your misgivings about me.
228
00:09:39,981 --> 00:09:42,081
If I was in your position, I would feel
229
00:09:42,083 --> 00:09:43,517
the exact same way.
230
00:09:43,519 --> 00:09:46,553
But you have to know I
wasn't looking for this.
231
00:09:46,555 --> 00:09:47,754
I'm not the guy
232
00:09:47,756 --> 00:09:49,088
who dates younger women.
233
00:09:49,090 --> 00:09:51,224
But we just...
234
00:09:51,226 --> 00:09:53,427
made a connection.
235
00:09:53,429 --> 00:09:55,995
And I want to reassure you
236
00:09:55,997 --> 00:09:59,799
that I care deeply about Violet.
237
00:10:01,001 --> 00:10:03,069
Okay, well, thank you.
- Yeah, okay.
238
00:10:04,271 --> 00:10:06,172
You ready?
239
00:10:06,174 --> 00:10:08,241
Yeah.
- Oh, uh,
240
00:10:08,243 --> 00:10:10,076
why don't you take the wine,
241
00:10:10,078 --> 00:10:13,011
since we can't drink it.
242
00:10:13,013 --> 00:10:15,113
Or open it.
243
00:10:15,115 --> 00:10:17,717
Thanks again, this was really great.
244
00:10:17,719 --> 00:10:18,884
Good night.
245
00:10:18,886 --> 00:10:21,053
Bye.
246
00:10:24,925 --> 00:10:27,426
I have a terrible confession to make.
247
00:10:27,428 --> 00:10:29,127
What?
248
00:10:29,129 --> 00:10:32,364
I like him better than I like her.
249
00:10:32,366 --> 00:10:34,766
I like him better than I like you.
250
00:10:45,085 --> 00:10:46,663
Seriously?
251
00:10:46,775 --> 00:10:49,075
You left me a to-do list?
252
00:10:49,077 --> 00:10:50,876
I've got an hour to do my homework
253
00:10:50,878 --> 00:10:52,312
before I run to the restaurant.
254
00:10:52,314 --> 00:10:55,448
Who else is gonna vacuum, clean
the bathroom, sort the laundry?
255
00:10:55,450 --> 00:10:56,716
Hey, I'm not your wife.
256
00:10:56,718 --> 00:10:58,851
You sure about that?
257
00:10:58,853 --> 00:11:00,886
I go out there and earn a living,
258
00:11:00,888 --> 00:11:03,222
we sleep in the same
bed and don't have sex.
259
00:11:03,224 --> 00:11:06,458
Maybe I am your wife.
260
00:11:07,894 --> 00:11:10,429
I'm not staying.
261
00:11:10,431 --> 00:11:11,864
What do you mean you're not staying?
262
00:11:11,866 --> 00:11:13,232
I haven't seen you for a week.
263
00:11:13,234 --> 00:11:15,400
Yeah, well, after I
grab a few of my things,
264
00:11:15,402 --> 00:11:16,901
you won't see me for another week.
265
00:11:20,684 --> 00:11:22,318
You're just gonna stand there?
266
00:11:22,344 --> 00:11:24,043
You're not gonna say anything?
267
00:11:24,057 --> 00:11:26,458
Hey, you're the man of the house.
268
00:11:30,730 --> 00:11:32,631
So, what's the deal?
269
00:11:32,633 --> 00:11:34,465
You living with Professor Higgins now?
270
00:11:34,467 --> 00:11:35,900
His last name is Munchnik.
271
00:11:35,902 --> 00:11:37,201
By George,
272
00:11:37,203 --> 00:11:38,970
she doesn't get the reference.
273
00:11:38,972 --> 00:11:41,205
Violet, I just want to
know what's going on.
274
00:11:41,207 --> 00:11:44,075
You've been spending a
lot of time over there.
275
00:11:44,077 --> 00:11:46,077
Why wouldn't I? His condo's great.
276
00:11:46,079 --> 00:11:47,911
Plus, he's got a gym in the building
277
00:11:47,913 --> 00:11:49,614
and underground parking.
278
00:11:49,616 --> 00:11:51,649
Oh, and he has a housekeeper.
279
00:11:51,651 --> 00:11:54,519
We have a housekeeper.
280
00:11:54,521 --> 00:11:58,356
Careful or you're sleeping
on the couch tonight.
281
00:11:58,358 --> 00:12:00,691
And you also really like him, right?
282
00:12:00,693 --> 00:12:02,026
Um,
283
00:12:02,028 --> 00:12:03,994
yeah, he's cool.
284
00:12:03,996 --> 00:12:06,163
Honey, you don't live with
a guy because he's cool.
285
00:12:06,165 --> 00:12:08,465
You live with him because
you have feelings for him.
286
00:12:08,467 --> 00:12:11,168
Is that what you guys
did when you were my age?
287
00:12:11,170 --> 00:12:12,903
She always goes to that.
288
00:12:12,905 --> 00:12:15,072
It is the smart play.
289
00:12:15,074 --> 00:12:17,574
Sweetheart, I'm...
290
00:12:17,576 --> 00:12:18,942
I'm just a little worried that...
291
00:12:18,944 --> 00:12:20,610
Mom, relax.
292
00:12:20,612 --> 00:12:23,647
We're just having fun, and
Gregory is crazy about me.
293
00:12:23,649 --> 00:12:25,148
I know he is,
294
00:12:25,150 --> 00:12:27,850
but I want to hear that
you're crazy about him, too,
295
00:12:27,852 --> 00:12:29,619
that you're not settling.
296
00:12:29,621 --> 00:12:32,021
Fine. I'm crazy about him.
He's the man of my dreams.
297
00:12:32,023 --> 00:12:33,323
See you later.
298
00:12:38,730 --> 00:12:42,065
Wow. You and I are more
in love than they are.
299
00:12:44,835 --> 00:12:48,137
I gotta tell ya... I
miss Violet being here,
300
00:12:48,139 --> 00:12:51,841
but I swear I've gotten
taller since she moved out.
301
00:12:51,843 --> 00:12:53,642
That's because you're not hunched over.
302
00:12:53,644 --> 00:12:55,043
You're not walking scared.
303
00:12:55,045 --> 00:12:56,745
You know what I noticed?
304
00:12:56,747 --> 00:12:58,046
Ever since she left,
305
00:12:58,048 --> 00:13:00,282
my bowels have gone from
irritable to delightful.
306
00:13:02,252 --> 00:13:04,620
Just so nice to have a
break from her sneering mug
307
00:13:04,622 --> 00:13:07,022
looking at me across the dinner table.
308
00:13:07,024 --> 00:13:09,258
All because you committed the terrible sin
309
00:13:09,260 --> 00:13:11,693
of asking how her day was.
310
00:13:11,695 --> 00:13:13,661
It's kind of like this, right?
311
00:13:16,432 --> 00:13:18,399
That's good.
312
00:13:18,401 --> 00:13:21,236
She always looks like
she smells something bad.
313
00:13:25,442 --> 00:13:26,907
Don't get me wrong. I love her.
314
00:13:26,909 --> 00:13:29,210
Oh, I love her, too.
315
00:13:29,212 --> 00:13:32,380
But it feels like some
sort of demonic spirit
316
00:13:32,382 --> 00:13:34,649
has been exorcised from the apartment.
317
00:13:34,651 --> 00:13:36,451
And we didn't even need a Catholic priest.
318
00:13:36,453 --> 00:13:39,420
Turns out we needed a
Jewish psychology professor.
319
00:13:39,422 --> 00:13:41,155
L'chaim.
320
00:13:48,197 --> 00:13:51,331
You know, it just occurred to
me that her bedroom's empty.
321
00:13:51,333 --> 00:13:52,933
That's true.
322
00:13:52,935 --> 00:13:56,103
So, what are we doing here?
323
00:13:56,105 --> 00:13:58,538
You're right. Get down there.
324
00:13:58,540 --> 00:13:59,873
You get down there.
325
00:13:59,875 --> 00:14:01,341
I like having my own bathroom.
326
00:14:01,343 --> 00:14:02,409
I'll flip you for it.
327
00:14:04,712 --> 00:14:07,614
I don't trust that commemorative coin.
328
00:14:12,487 --> 00:14:14,621
Oh, damn it.
329
00:14:20,594 --> 00:14:22,762
Move over.
- What happened?
330
00:14:22,764 --> 00:14:24,697
Roscoe's smarter than both of us.
331
00:14:27,835 --> 00:14:30,569
He didn't give any hints over the phone?
332
00:14:30,571 --> 00:14:33,071
No, just said it was important,
333
00:14:33,073 --> 00:14:36,642
and he wanted to talk to us in person.
334
00:14:36,644 --> 00:14:39,612
You don't think he wants
to return Violet, do you?
335
00:14:39,614 --> 00:14:42,181
Doesn't matter. He's had her for 30 days.
336
00:14:42,183 --> 00:14:44,183
We don't have to take her back.
337
00:14:48,322 --> 00:14:50,322
All right, well, let's go
hear what he has to say.
338
00:14:50,324 --> 00:14:52,191
Stand up straight.
339
00:14:55,761 --> 00:14:57,830
Here we go.
340
00:14:57,832 --> 00:14:59,631
This really wasn't necessary.
341
00:14:59,633 --> 00:15:01,967
Don't be silly. You're Violet's boyfriend.
342
00:15:01,969 --> 00:15:04,303
Right?
343
00:15:04,305 --> 00:15:06,270
Right.
344
00:15:09,975 --> 00:15:13,144
So, what did you want to talk about?
345
00:15:13,146 --> 00:15:16,881
Well, you both know how amazing Violet is.
346
00:15:21,654 --> 00:15:24,021
Sure.
- Okay.
347
00:15:24,023 --> 00:15:26,090
So it'll come as no surprise to you
348
00:15:26,092 --> 00:15:29,493
when I tell you how much I love her.
349
00:15:29,495 --> 00:15:32,029
We love her, too. Yeah, we love her.
350
00:15:32,031 --> 00:15:35,632
And the reason I wanted
to speak with you guys was
351
00:15:35,634 --> 00:15:38,069
to get your blessing.
352
00:15:38,071 --> 00:15:40,070
I'd like to marry your daughter.
353
00:15:42,206 --> 00:15:44,375
Is she pregnant?
354
00:15:44,377 --> 00:15:46,710
No!
355
00:15:46,712 --> 00:15:49,413
Then why do you want to marry her?
356
00:15:49,415 --> 00:15:50,481
Mom!
357
00:15:52,184 --> 00:15:54,351
Sorry. You kind of caught us off guard.
358
00:15:54,353 --> 00:15:56,419
It's okay. I know it's sudden.
359
00:15:56,421 --> 00:15:59,923
Um, before we give our blessing,
360
00:15:59,925 --> 00:16:01,858
I just have one question.
361
00:16:01,860 --> 00:16:03,927
Really? I have eight.
362
00:16:06,163 --> 00:16:10,400
Do you understand what it
means to be a 19-year-old girl?
363
00:16:10,402 --> 00:16:14,203
How... unformed her thinking is?
364
00:16:14,205 --> 00:16:16,939
That's one of the things I love about her.
365
00:16:16,941 --> 00:16:20,175
She's not jaded, she sees
the world with fresh eyes.
366
00:16:20,177 --> 00:16:23,312
Wait'll you see those eyes when
you drink the last Diet Snapple.
367
00:16:25,482 --> 00:16:27,016
Don't worry.
368
00:16:27,018 --> 00:16:28,951
I'll never do anything to upset her.
369
00:16:28,953 --> 00:16:32,754
Oh, if only that were possible.
370
00:16:32,756 --> 00:16:36,892
So, do I take that as a
"yes," I have your permission?
371
00:16:36,894 --> 00:16:39,861
Gregory, I appreciate you coming to us,
372
00:16:39,863 --> 00:16:41,797
but it's really not our call.
373
00:16:41,799 --> 00:16:45,133
Yeah, Violet might not be as
ready to settle down as you are.
374
00:16:45,135 --> 00:16:48,002
I hear you.
375
00:16:48,004 --> 00:16:50,939
I just can't help the way I feel.
376
00:16:50,941 --> 00:16:53,608
I'm desperately in love.
377
00:16:53,610 --> 00:16:55,911
Oh, you poor bastard.
378
00:16:55,913 --> 00:16:57,979
Bring it in.
379
00:17:01,116 --> 00:17:03,284
No, I got here first. It's my room.
380
00:17:03,286 --> 00:17:05,753
Okay, here's a fun idea.
381
00:17:05,755 --> 00:17:08,456
What if we put a tent in the living room,
382
00:17:08,458 --> 00:17:10,691
and you could pretend
you're camping every night?
383
00:17:10,693 --> 00:17:12,760
What am I, seven?
384
00:17:17,066 --> 00:17:19,299
That was pathetic.
385
00:17:20,902 --> 00:17:23,170
What's pathetic is I have to return a tent.
386
00:17:26,174 --> 00:17:27,441
Hey.
387
00:17:27,443 --> 00:17:29,076
Hey.
388
00:17:29,078 --> 00:17:30,811
What brings you by?
389
00:17:30,813 --> 00:17:32,780
I needed to talk to you guys.
390
00:17:32,782 --> 00:17:35,082
About?
391
00:17:35,084 --> 00:17:38,285
Last night at dinner,
Gregory proposed to me.
392
00:17:38,287 --> 00:17:41,921
Yeah, he mentioned he might do that.
393
00:17:41,923 --> 00:17:43,723
What did you say?
394
00:17:43,725 --> 00:17:45,192
Did you let him down easy?
395
00:17:45,194 --> 00:17:48,428
Well, I was going to...
396
00:17:48,430 --> 00:17:51,664
but then he showed me this
awesome ring, and I said "yes!"
397
00:17:55,603 --> 00:17:59,873
I am going be Mrs. Gregory Munchnik.
398
00:18:04,448 --> 00:18:05,948
Hello?
399
00:18:06,807 --> 00:18:08,453
Your daughter just got engaged.
400
00:18:08,455 --> 00:18:09,744
This is good news.
401
00:18:09,776 --> 00:18:11,523
Yeah, sure, it's good...
402
00:18:12,692 --> 00:18:14,158
if this is what you want.
403
00:18:14,160 --> 00:18:16,528
Why wouldn't it be?
404
00:18:16,530 --> 00:18:19,731
God, my housekeeper was
happier for me than you two are.
405
00:18:19,733 --> 00:18:21,666
Honey, this is a big step.
406
00:18:21,668 --> 00:18:24,235
We just want to know that
you've thought this through.
407
00:18:24,237 --> 00:18:26,470
Yeah, is this the guy
you're gonna be with forever?
408
00:18:26,472 --> 00:18:28,572
Well, I doubt it'll be forever,
409
00:18:28,574 --> 00:18:31,742
but for a first marriage,
he's pretty perfect.
410
00:18:34,112 --> 00:18:36,547
Come here.
411
00:18:36,549 --> 00:18:38,916
I'm just worried
412
00:18:38,918 --> 00:18:41,919
you're marrying a man you're
not really in love with.
413
00:18:41,921 --> 00:18:44,421
Were you in love with Baxter or my dad?
414
00:18:44,423 --> 00:18:45,956
Yes.
415
00:18:45,958 --> 00:18:47,925
And how did that work out for you?
416
00:18:50,995 --> 00:18:53,163
Sometimes I just hate this kid.
417
00:18:55,166 --> 00:18:57,700
Violet, marriage is hard enough
418
00:18:57,702 --> 00:18:59,669
when you're desperately
in love with each other
419
00:18:59,671 --> 00:19:02,005
and you think it's never gonna end,
420
00:19:02,007 --> 00:19:05,108
but going into it knowing
it's doomed is just so...
421
00:19:05,110 --> 00:19:06,343
Realistic?
422
00:19:06,345 --> 00:19:08,979
I was gonna say "sad."
423
00:19:08,981 --> 00:19:11,181
What is so bad about this?
424
00:19:11,183 --> 00:19:15,351
I have someone who loves me
and wants to take care of me,
425
00:19:15,353 --> 00:19:16,953
and it's good for you guys
426
00:19:16,955 --> 00:19:19,321
because I'm no longer a
problem for you anymore.
427
00:19:19,323 --> 00:19:21,090
Violet, you were never a problem.
428
00:19:21,092 --> 00:19:24,961
Yeah, we say all the
time how much we love you.
429
00:19:24,963 --> 00:19:26,929
There's the face. There's the face.
430
00:19:29,500 --> 00:19:32,334
Trust me, I know what I'm doing.
431
00:19:39,043 --> 00:19:41,043
Oh, God.
432
00:19:41,045 --> 00:19:43,112
You have to let her live her life.
433
00:19:43,114 --> 00:19:44,813
She's a grown woman.
434
00:19:44,815 --> 00:19:46,315
Mom!
435
00:19:46,317 --> 00:19:50,719
Roscoe threw out all my teddy bears!
436
00:19:50,721 --> 00:19:53,421
Now we know what to get
her as a wedding gift.
437
00:20:04,746 --> 00:20:06,380
Whatcha doin'?
438
00:20:06,382 --> 00:20:08,382
Working on my dating profile.
439
00:20:08,384 --> 00:20:09,851
EHarmony? Match?
440
00:20:09,853 --> 00:20:11,519
Senior-Mingle.
441
00:20:11,521 --> 00:20:13,788
You're kidding.
442
00:20:13,790 --> 00:20:15,356
Maybe Violet's on to something.
443
00:20:15,358 --> 00:20:17,291
Oh, God, you can't be that desperate.
444
00:20:17,293 --> 00:20:19,293
Check out some of these old dudes.
445
00:20:19,295 --> 00:20:20,627
This one's 82 years old.
446
00:20:20,629 --> 00:20:22,195
He's got a beach house in Hawaii,
447
00:20:22,197 --> 00:20:24,230
a brownstone in San
Francisco, and look here...
448
00:20:24,232 --> 00:20:25,932
Under special skills:
449
00:20:25,934 --> 00:20:27,534
"Can drive at night."
450
00:20:28,971 --> 00:20:30,804
Slide over.
451
00:20:30,806 --> 00:20:32,238
I'm gonna give him a poke.
452
00:20:32,240 --> 00:20:35,041
Careful you don't break his hip.
453
00:20:35,043 --> 00:20:37,210
Ooh! Take a look at this silver fox.
454
00:20:37,212 --> 00:20:38,577
Mm.
455
00:20:38,579 --> 00:20:41,080
22,000 square foot home in Carmel.
456
00:20:41,082 --> 00:20:43,716
"Enjoys short walks on the beach."
457
00:20:46,120 --> 00:20:48,852
Ah, just so we're clear,
you're giving up on love?
458
00:20:49,227 --> 00:20:50,953
I've had love. I want a housekeeper.
459
00:20:50,977 --> 00:20:52,977
- Synced and corrected by ChrisKe -
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