[zoom]
- They're coming!
They're coming!
- Oh, places, everyone!
Okay, go, go, go, go, go!
- I thought you said
they were coming.
- Give them a minute.
I am the fastest kid
in the world.
- Morning, guys.
- Hey.
All: Happy birthday!
- Ooh, we get to blow out
mom's fingers.
[fingers zapping]
- Oh, trick fingers.
Man, we fall for it every
year.
- [laughs]
Happy birthday, babies!
One year older,
one year cuter!
- All right, time to unwrap
your birthday breakfast.
And remember, I get to lick
the wrapping paper.
Both:
Unwrap! Unwrap!
- Ooh, smiley face pancakes.
Both: Eat the face!
Eat the face!
- Barb, we all set
for tonight's traditional
Thunderman birthday party?
- Mm-hmm, birthday cake
shaped like a piñata: Check.
- Piñata shaped
like a birthday cake: Check.
- Billy and Nora's
puppet show.
Both: Check.
- And finally a preview
of your birthday rap!
- We're still doing that?
- Drop me a fat beat, Barb.
- I guess we are.
- [beat boxing]
- ♪ A boom, a bap,
it's your birthday rap ♪
♪ Put your hands together
everybody, go clap ♪
♪ On this day in history,
we celebrate the birth of Max
♪
- ♪ And Phoebe ♪
- Birthday breakdown.
[all beat boxing]
- Right behind you!
I think I'm having
a birthday breakdown.
- I know.
Me too.
We're getting too old for
this.
- You can't break it down
without your birthday hats.
- Oh, my wittle twinsies!
- No.
- Definitely too old.
Ow, okay.
- Stop it.
- No, not that.
- No, stop it, no.
[both groaning]
[upbeat music]
- ♪ What you see ♪
♪ Is not what you get ♪
♪ Living our lives
with a secret ♪
♪ We fit right in,
bet you'd never guess ♪
♪ 'Cause we're living our
lives
just like all the rest ♪
♪ A picture-perfect family
is what we try to be ♪
♪ Look closer,
you might see ♪
♪ The crazy things we do ♪
♪ This isn't make-believe,
it's our reality ♪
♪ Just your average family ♪
♪ Trying to be normal
and stay out of trouble ♪
♪ Living a double life ♪
- [grunting and growling]
It's taking me forever
to wrap your present.
Boy, I miss my thumbs.
- What are you doing down here?
- Hiding from
the birthday madness.
Dad just put
on his break-dancing sweats,
and they're about 20 years
too small.
- Ugh.
- When did we stop enjoying
Mom and Dad's birthday stuff?
- Right after Mom dropped
the "fat beat."
- Maybe--maybe it's time
we have a cool party,
like the one Cherry had.
No silly hats,
no piñatas,
and no break-dancing
butt cracks.
- Are you saying
we should throw our own party
without our parents?
- Are you recording
our conversation?
- Not anymore.
- We just need to get
Mom and Dad to let us throw
it.
- I can handle them.
We'll need rope for Mom,
titanium chains for Dad.
The cage is for the little ones.
- See, what scares me is,
you have all that stuff,
don't you?
- Listen.
I might be late to your party.
I have tape everywhere.
And I do mean everywhere.
- And so to sum up,
Max and I are old enough
to throw our own birthday party.
It'll be at Wong's Pizza Palace.
And we'll only invite
a few of our friends.
- But we're your friends.
- Our friends under 40.
- Well, I suppose if Phoebe's
two-hour presentation
taught us anything, it's that
they're not kids anymore.
And that we need
a more comfortable sofa.
- But they are kids.
He's our Maxy Bear!
And she's Bumble-Phoebe.
Okay, I see what you're
saying.
- So we can have our party?
- Well, I suppose,
if you stick to the plan...
- Whoo!
- Sweet!
- Oh, oh, okay.
- This is the best present
ever.
Thank you.
- Just to be clear,
I still want actual presents.
- I can't believe
they're growing up so fast.
- Guess we don't
need this anymore.
Candy never grows up.
- What's this about
no family party tonight?
- Yeah, we had
a whole puppet show planned.
- Way to go, old man.
Sorry.
Puppet Billy has anger issues.
- At least we still have
Billy and Nora.
- Yeah, but how long
before they grow up?
- Thanks for raising me,
Mom and Dad,
but I'm out of here.
- I'm off too.
But I'll visit at Christmas
if my wife lets me.
- We can't let the years
slip away
the way we did
with Phoebe and Max.
- You're right, we have to make
every precious minute count.
- Yeah, okay.
- Hey, uh, Barb,
I could really go
for a puppet show.
- Oh, me too.
Do we know anybody
who can do a puppet show?
- Do we know anybody
who could do a puppet--
Wait! We can!
- Oh!
- Yep, just me
and three dummies.
[upbeat dace music playing]
- Fun party, birthday girl!
But, you know, I think
that there's actually
something
wrong with your bathroom.
- That's a photo booth.
- Ooh.
- We're doing it, Max.
We're throwing our own party.
- Yeah,
it's a pretty good start.
- Oh.
Hey, Mrs. Wong.
Thanks again for letting us
have our party here.
- Of course!
I like you.
I'm sorry, did I say you?
I meant your money.
More overpriced pizzas
on the way!
- Uh, Mrs. Wong,
let me help you out with
those.
- Did you wash your hands?
[laughs]
I'm just kidding.
It's only your friends.
[laughs]
- More guests, Phoebe?
Somebody is getting
ubes popular.
- I didn't invite them
or them
or those guys.
- More people.
Good thing
I brought my name tag.
- So are these pizzas for us?
- No, my delivery guy
is taking these
to the Sweep The Leg Dojo.
They're made with cheese.
Yours are the ones made
with "cheese."
- Hey, Max, there's a bunch
of kids from school, but--
whoosh!
- Why did you freeze Mrs. Wong?
- Were you about to tell me
there's a bunch of kids
from school showing up that
you
don't remember inviting?
- Yes.
- That's why.
We don't need Wong knowing
I invited the whole school
to our party.
- But that wasn't a part
of my presentation!
- Yeah, well, I added a page.
- "Freeze Wong.
Invite entire school."
Wait, why is
that stick figure yelling?
- Well, that's you
when you heard my plan.
- That's a very accurate
depiction!
- Look, I needed to make sure
our first real birthday party
was the greatest party ever.
- By inviting the whole school?
That's a terrible idea.
- Phoebe, this is
the greatest party ever.
- Even she gets it.
- Whoa, that is one
creepy ice sculpture.
This party has everything.
Yeah!
Ooh, ooh, ooh.
- [sighs]
I don't know about this, Max.
Oh, come on, Pheebs.
It'll be easy.
We just unfreeze Wong
after the party.
It'll be like nothing
happened.
- Rational Phoebe says no.
- Come on.
- But party Phoebe says
let's go rock our birthday!
- All right!
[dance music playing]
All: Happy birthday, Max!
- I may have forgotten to put
your name in the invitation.
- Oh, no!
Sheepzilla's going to eat
my faithful sidekick.
- Laser it, Super Nora.
- Time to make some lamb chops.
[can hisses]
- This is b-a-a-a-d.
Ugh.
[blows raspberry]
- The end.
- Ah!
- Bravo! Bravo!
- Do it again!
Do it again!
- But we've already
done it twice.
- Well, not in high-def,
you haven't.
I'm getting the camera.
- Oh, hurry, Hank!
They're getting older!
- Thunder Man, away!
[dance music playing]
♪ ♪
- My first real party.
Crowd surfing!
[thud]
Don't worry, guys.
We'll get this right.
- Hey, Phoebe,
help me get some more pizzas.
- Someone should tell Evan
that no one's gonna catch him.
- Eh, don't worry about it.
- Crowd surf--
[thud]
I'm beginning to think it's me.
- I told you I know
how to throw a rocking party.
Both: Where did you put
Mrs. Wong?
Both: Where did you
put Mrs. Wong?
Both: Me?
Stop that!
- We lost a frozen woman.
What are we gonna do?
- There's only one thing to do.
[both screaming]
- I don't get it.
Mrs. Wong was right here
when you froze her.
How could she be gone?
- Oh, no.
I'm standing in a puddle
of melted Wong.
Ah, no.
Tastes like lemonade.
And everyone
who's ever walked in here.
- You're in so much trouble.
You just had to turn her
into a Wongsicle!
Now Mom and Dad will never let
us throw our own party again.
- We'll spend the rest
of our birthdays
breaking it down with mc Barb
and DJ Double Flush.
- We've got to find her.
She couldn't have
just walked out of here.
Somebody had
to have carried her out.
- Look.
All those pizzas are gone.
Maybe the deliver guy thought
Mrs. Wong was an ice sculpture
and delivered her
to the Sweep The Leg Dojo.
- Then we should go there.
It's our only clue.
Unless you want to keep
licking
the floor.
- Wait.
If we have to leave,
at least let us leave
through the only party
we may ever throw.
♪ ♪
- Max, we don't have time
for this.
- [sighs]
- Oh, Phoebe, dance with us!
- Whoo!
- Phoebe, we don't have time
for this.
[can hissing]
- This is b-a-a-a-d.
[blows raspberry]
- The end...
for the seventh time.
- Ah!
- [whistles]
- Stop clapping!
It's not that good.
- We love it,
'cause we love you.
We want to cherish
these moments.
- Well, can you cherish
the moment
of letting us eat dinner?
- All right, kids,
go on and eat.
There's some leftover
mac and cheese in the fridge.
- Aw, look at them run
with their little legs.
- These are the best times,
when they always
want to be around us.
- These are the worst times.
- I can't stand
being around them.
[high-pitched whirring]
They're behind us, aren't
they?
- Just keep eating.
[gentle drum and strings music]
♪ ♪
[students grunting]
- Okay, there's Wong.
What's our plan?
[straw bubbles]
Did you have to stop
for one of those?
- It's my birthday.
I deserve a treat.
[students grunting]
- Okay, maybe if we ask
the sensei nicely,
he'll let us have
Mrs. Wong back.
He looks reasonable.
- All right, grasshoppers,
watch as your sensei
breaks his own arm
and then resets the bone.
Ah!
[screams]
[grunts]
Yeah.
- You know what?
You froze Wong. You handle this.
- All right, mat rats,
before our pizza party,
we must bow to the chosen one.
- Now's my chance.
I'll grab Wong while Sensei
Psycho has his back turned.
- Legend says that she
and her googly eyes will
return
and inspire us with wisdom and--
Brendan, put down
that stuffed crust!
Your parents didn't pay
for your class this week.
Nothing gets past Sensei
Kenny,
especially some bozo
trying to rob from my dojo.
- Uh...
[laughs nervously]
Funny story.
Um, this is actually
my ice sculpture.
I just didn't want to
interrupt
your weird pizza party.
- Who are you calling weird?
I'm an unlicensed karate master.
Brendan, break my finger!
Ah! Put it back!
Put it back!
Put it--
[screams]
Yeah.
You still want to rob
my ice sculpture?
- Please don't hurt...you.
I just want to take back
what's rightfully mine.
- Okay.
You have to fight for it.
- I can't fight you.
You're insane.
- You're not gonna fight me.
I have 27 broken bones.
Crack!
28.
Beginners class,
circle of doom!
- Beginners class.
You know,
I'll take on these tots,
but I'm warning you,
I got fists of fury.
- Break some bones!
Make the googly-eyed
chosen one proud!
[laughs]
- Ugh!
Whoa!
Ugh.
Whoa!
[grunting and groaning]
No!
Get 'em off!
Get 'em off me!
Ah!
Crack!
Ugh.
Put it back!
[groaning]
- [laughing]
- [groaning]
[gong clangs]
- [laughing]
- Oh, get 'em off!
Ow!
Brendan!
[groaning]
- Can we go to bed now?
- Nope, it's family movie time.
- Well, at least
they can't make this weird.
- It's the movies
we took of you today!
- And they made it weird.
- Oh, no!
Sheepzilla's going to eat
my faithful sidekick.
- Laser it, Super Nora.
- [laughs]
Remember when you did that?
- Yes, because it was
an hour ago!
- You were so cute back then.
- Now look how cute they are
watching how cute they are.
- What is happening?
- They've gone full cray-cray.
- Oh!
The latest hip kid slang.
I'm so glad I got it.
- That's it.
I'm going to the bathroom.
- Oh, cool.
I'll film that too.
- Stop!
The bathroom is Billy time.
- We can't take this anymore.
- We're out of here.
Hop on, Nora.
[zoom]
- I can't believe
we drove away our children.
Did you record it?
- Every second.
- Ah!
Let's go watch it!
[laughter]
- Oh, look, little...
- That's right.
Slap him in a
hokey-pokey.
Whack his tramboozle.
Chop him in a dewabula!
[laughs]
- Stop!
I am the chosen one,
and I have returned.
- The chosen one
in a strip mall?
I don't think so.
- Behold my googly eyes
if you dare.
- Oh, please.
Many people have googly eyes.
Look at my assistant, Troy.
- Well, if I weren't
the chosen one,
would I be able to do this?
- That's not very impressive.
- It would be if I were
floating, like in the
painting.
- Yeah, that would be cool.
Oh!
- It is you!
You are the chosen one!
Troy, you seeing this?
- Psst, Troy, over here.
- Everyone, kneel.
This is amazing.
Why are you here, great one?
Do you want pizza?
A free lesson?
You need me to validate
your parking?
Brendan, get the stamp!
- No, I am here
for the ice sculpture.
- Well, you can have anything
you want.
You want a kid?
Brendan, get your
shoes!
- That's a very generous offer,
but just the sculpture will
do.
- It's yours.
- Yes.
- Oh!
The chosen one meant to do that.
- Hey, chosen one,
will you get the door?
- On it.
Chosen one, out.
- Did you all see that?
You see that?
The chosen one was in my dojo!
Floating!
[laughs]
I'm gonna put that on my flier.
I am.
Yeah.
- Cold, cold, cold,
cold, cold, cold, ah.
You couldn't help me carry
her?
- Hey, I am the chosen one.
- Well, the party train
got derailed,
and I got beat up by a biker
gang, but back in business.
- Biker gang?
They were little kids.
- My birthday, my story.
Now let's get back in there.
Who's ready to party?
- Apparently nobody.
[sighs]
Shoot.
14 texts from Cherry.
"Where are you?
"Great party.
"Someone brought a monkey.
"Who knew monkeys can dance?
"Ooo-oo, ee-ee.
Sorry, monkey took my phone."
Both: Oh.
"Best party ever.
"Cleaned up.
Happy birthday, bestie."
- Well, the good news is,
we threw the best party ever.
The bad news is,
we missed the whole thing.
- Talk about
your birthday breakdown.
After all
we went through tonight,
the only thing we have to show
for it is a slice of pizza.
- With fake cheese.
- You know, none of this
would have happened
if we had just stayed home
with Mom and Dad.
- Yeah.
Their parties may be silly,
but they are kind of fun.
- Mm, and there's no biker gang
there to beat you up.
Oh, by the way, keeping that lie
is your birthday present.
You want to go home?
- Yeah.
I hurt everywhere.
- We should probably
unfreeze Wong.
- Yeah.
- Okay, so whatever fun
activity you want to do.
Totally your choice.
- Yeah, as long as we get
to spend quality time together,
we are happy.
- Well, this is a big bowl
of uncomfortable.
Adios, crazies.
Ooh.
- He's right.
We're a mess.
- Of course we are.
We miss our babies
on their birthday.
- Hey, guys,
how was your party?
- It went so fast, it was like
we weren't even there.
Is it too late to do something
here with you guys?
- Oh!
- [shrieks]
- [clears throat]
- I suppose
we could do something.
- Yeah, I mean,
it's late notice,
but we could probably change
our plans.
And don't worry.
No hats.
No beat boxing.
- But what if we told you
that's the reason we came home?
- Are you serious?
- [squeals]
Our babies are back!
- Drop me a beat, Barb!
- [beat boxing]
- ♪ A boom, a bap,
it's your birthday rap ♪
♪ Put your hands together ♪
♪ Everybody, go clap ♪
♪ On this day in history ♪
♪ We celebrate
the birth of Max ♪
- ♪ And Phoebe ♪
- ♪ He was a boy ♪
- ♪ She was a girl ♪
- ♪ Came into our lives and...
♪
Both: ♪ Changed our world ♪
- [beat boxing]