- [loud snoring]
- Sure I'll join your squad, Taylor Swift.
- COLOSSO: [snoring]
- [cymbals clanging] - COLOSSO & MAX: [gasping]
- COLOSSO: Oh. Geez. Oh.
Ah, shake it off, Max. It's just Phoebe.
- Congratulations.
You actually found a sound more annoying than your voice.
- It's patrol time, teammate.
We're trying to join
to most elite superhero group in the world,
and the Z Force does not sleep in.
- It's 4:30 a.m.! - I know.
We're a half an hour late.
Did you even notice the schedule I made you?
- Your schedule is insane.
You only gave me one bathroom break a day.
- Exactly.
Here's your diaper. See you upstairs.
- Right behind you, partner.
Colosso, you know what to do.
- Help you with your diaper?
- No.
Hit "snooze."
- Oh.
- [button beeps]
- [metal clanking]
- Good night.
- Good night, sweet prince.
- Stop being creepy.
I'm sorry, Phoebe, the lair got locked down
and I was forced to go back to sleep for three hours.
- That was yesterday!
- Huh. No wonder I feel so refreshed.
Time for breakfast.
- Max, the schedule clearly states we're brunch people now.
Two meals in one.
Efficiency equals Z Force.
- I wanna get into Z Force, too, but the answer is not brunch
and diapers--although these are surprisingly comfy.
- Okay, well, what are you doing to help our team, huh?
I bet you didn't even buy
the training equipment we saved up for.
- See, that's where you're wrong.
- You bought them?
- No, just felt good to say you're wrong.
- Come on, the Z Force is tracking our performance.
And training on flour sack punching bags
doesn't exactly look good.
- [groans] I have flour in bad places.
- That didn't happen during training.
I don't know why he's covered in flour.
- Relax, Phoebe.
I didn't get that training equipment because I got
something else that's guaranteed to get us into Z Force--
our very own team headquarters.
- You spent all of our training equipment money on a treehouse?
- [laughing] Phoebe, treehouses are for kids.
It's a tree fort.
- Max, we don't need this thing.
Our house is already like a giant headquarters
with free WiFi.
- But this place has aerial surveillance views,
and is private, and--
Wait, mom and dad don't charge you for WiFi?
- Okay, Max, you can't just use our money
to buy a headquarters without asking me.
- Well, you can't schedule every second of my life.
I need sleep.
All this doesn't just happen, you know?
- Uh-oh. I just realized something.
- Oh, the smell?
Yeah, I think there's a dead squirrel in here somewhere.
- No.
We make a terrible team.
- That is not true.
If it were, why would I give you my last yogurt stick?
- Oh, thanks.
Ugh!
What flavor is this?
- Expired.
You're right, we do make a terrible team.
- ¶
¶ What you see ¶
¶ Is not what you get ¶
¶ Livin' our lives with a secret ¶
¶ We fit right in ¶
¶ Bet you never guessed ¶
¶ 'Cause we're livin' our lives ¶
¶ Just like all the rest ¶
¶ A picture perfect family ¶
¶ Is what we try to be ¶
¶ Look closer, you might see ¶
¶ The crazy things we do ¶
¶ This isn't make believe ¶
¶ It's our reality ¶
¶ Just your average family ¶
¶ Trying to be normal and stay out of trouble ¶
¶ Livin' a double life ¶¶
- ¶
- So today revealed our team has a few wrinkles to iron out.
- A few?
Our team has more wrinkles than an old lady in a tanning salon.
Worst summer job ever.
- But joining the Z Force has always been a dream of mine,
and if being your teammate is the only way to
make that happen, then I'll do anything to make it work.
- Me, too.
Unless it means doing things for you, with you, or near you.
- Pretty sure it's a bad attitude
that got you fired from the Tanny Granny.
Oh, we are officially hopeless.
- HANK: Have no fear...
Thunder Man is here!
- And where there's thunder, there's Electress!
- [electrical zapping]
- Why are you guys in your supersuits?
- We're suited up because we're about to save you two
from blowing your chance at the Z Force.
- And it's laundry day.
Now, as life mates and superhero partners,
we know a lot about building a successful team.
- In fact, we put out a self-help book in the '90s
called "Smells Like Team Spirit."
- How come we've never seen it?
- PHOEBE & MAX: [laughing]
- That's why.
- So what do you say?
Let us help you two become the team we know you can be.
- I mean, hey, if it'll help our chances
of getting in the Z Force, it's worth a shot.
- I agree.
I'm just not gonna read any books.
- Oh, good thing it comes with an instructional video.
- Please tell me there's room in your schedule
to make fun of Mom and Dad?
- You're gonna have to skip brushing your teeth,
but we can make it work.
- HANK: [laughing]
- COLOSSO: Ugh!
You expect me to eat this slop?!
- I don't cook it. I just dump it.
- Ugh!
You know, back when Max was evil,
he used to steal me fresh vegetables
from all the neighbors' gardens.
- Well, Max is good now,
and no one's stealing vegetables for you,
so just eat your canned succotash.
- You know what?
You all succotash!
- Hey, you guys.
Will you tell me if I'm gonna hit the table?
- [heavy thud]
- You hit the table.
- Billy, why aren't you using your new backpack?
- A nice kid at school borrowed it--
along with my lunch money and math homework.
- That's not good.
- Yeah, especially for the poor kid
who stole your math homework. [laughing]
- No, I meant it's not good that you're so gullible.
- What's gullible?
- There's a raccoon in your shorts.
- [gasps] Aah, get it out!
- That's gullible.
It means you're easily tricked.
- I am not.
- The raccoon's back.
- Aah! [zooming]
- Oh, so it's funny when you do it.
- Well, well, well.
Sounds like Gulli-Billy might be my ticket to veggie town.
Ach! Ach! This food is all succ and no tash.
Ugh!
- Now, you've watched the teambuilding video
critics called "a super-powered joyride."
- That quote's from you.
- The point is you're now ready for teambuilding exercises!
- Any time you're a bad teammate, Nora will zap you.
- [lasers zapping] - PHOEBE & MAX: Ow!
- I could tell you weren't thinking about the team.
- Now, your first exercise will really put the art in partner.
- BARB & HANK: [laughing]
- This puts the stupid in stupid.
- Now, you'll each take turns painting.
Soon you'll have a beautiful piece of art
representing your team.
- Okay. Guess I'll go first.
- Uh, Phoebe? Allow me.
You have the art skills of a howler monkey.
- [powers whooshing]
- Wow. Hey, you are remarkably good at that.
But it's my turn.
- Hold on. I'm on a roll.
- No, come on, Max. It's my turn.
- And...done.
Ha ha!
Now this says team.
- You painted your face.
- Yeah, well, can't spell "team" without "me."
- [lasers zapping] - MAX: Ow!
- This is better than the free WiFi.
- When it comes to teams, the word "mine" should be avoided,
which is why we've turned our driveway into a minefield!
- Nice wordplay, Dad.
Also, won't we blow up?
- No. These are smoke mines.
And they're perfectly safe.
- We'll give you a two-second peek
at the map of where the mines are located.
Then you'll work together to avoid them.
Got it?
Good luck, team.
- Okay. I've got a photographic memory.
Follow my lead.
- Okay, okay, Phoebe, I can help.
- Okay, uh, I'm not gonna listen to the guy
who forgot his twin sister's birthday.
- I did not forget it.
I just chose to ignore it.
- Okay, and I just choose to ignore you.
- [buzzing, hissing]
- Zap her, Nora.
- [lasers zapping] - PHOEBE: Ow!
- [chuckles] Nice shot.
- [lasers zapping] - MAX: Ow!
- I don't like kiss-ups.
- Trail of candy leading right to Colosso.
- Oh, Billy, I'm so glad you fell for it.
I'm sorry.
It's just that I planted vegetables
in our neighbors' gardens, but have no way of getting them.
- I hate to see you like this.
So I'm gonna go back upstairs.
- If only I knew a person with a kind heart
and superspeed who could help.
- Hey, I have a kind heart and superspeed.
I can help.
- Really?
You're my hero, Billy!
- Wish Nora heard you say that.
Can you believe she thinks I'm gullible?
- G--you, gullible?
Never.
Now, here are the addresses of the gardens
where I planted my vegetables.
- Wait a minute.
That's how you spell Hiddenville?
- It's almost too easy. [chuckling]
- Welcome to the telekinesis trust fall.
- Teammates need to always have each other's backs.
If not, you could end up in a serious jam.
[laughing]
- Get it? 'Cause the pit's filled with jam.
- Yeah, we get it.
You guys rolled.
Can we get to the training part now, please?
- In this test, these thunder balls can swing down
and knock you off your platform at any moment.
- So be ready to use your powers to catch each other in midair,
or you could end up in a real...pickle.
[laughing]
- Hank, pickle toss is later.
- Oh.
- Okay. Keep your arms in front of you.
It'll quicken your reaction time.
[powers whooshing] - Whoa!
I was just stretching.
Stop being a control freak.
- I'm not a control freak.
Now just do exactly as I say.
- Oh, right, 'cause you're the boss of me.
Oops, 3:00 o'clock.
I missed my potty break.
- First of all, your potty break is at 4:00.
At least I care about this team.
All you care about is yourself.
- I care about the team, especially my half of it.
- Oh, you mean the half that didn't ask me
before buying a rat-infested treehouse.
- They are not rats.
They're just really big termites.
- Guys, stay focused.
- Face it, Max.
You are the reason we don't make a good team.
- Oh, really, 'cause I think it's you.
Put that in your diaper and wear it.
- MAX & PHOEBE: Whoa!
- Oh! - Oh.
- You guys okay?
- Yeah, this exercise made me realize
I never wanna be partners with Max again!
- Yeah. This team is done.
- I'd zap them, but they already zapped themselves.
Oh, what the heck.
- [lasers zapping] - MAX & PHOEBE: Ow!
- Phoebe, you're wearing your supersuit.
Does this mean you and Max made up?
- I decided that the Z Force is more important
than any silly fights,
so I figured out a way to work with Max.
- Oh, we are so proud of you!
- [powers whooshing]
- I'm replacing Max with this dummy that looks like Max.
- Honey, did you hit your head on the jam pit?
- No, but with the Z Force watching,
I need to make it look like Max is still my partner.
- So you're gonna lug a dummy all over town?
- Yeah. Nothing's changed.
Plus, this dummy doesn't do selfish things
like buy useless tree forts.
- Actually, it's now called an air lair.
Good-looking mannequin.
- Come on, new Max. We've got a city to save.
Still a better partner.
- Max, follow her and end this silly fight.
- No way. That control freak called me selfish.
- Why are you holding our microwave?
- Take it to my air lair.
And you guys get to buy a new one.
See? Not selfish.
- I had a burrito in there.
- [zooming]
- That's some sweet corn-on-the-cob.
Put it with the stash.
- Dr. Colosso?
- We're pals now, Billy.
Call me Uncle Dr. Colosso.
- There's one thing I'm confused about.
- One thing? [chuckles]
Go on.
- Why do you plant all these vegetables
in other people's gardens?
- Billy, farmers are like magicians.
We never reveal our secrets,
and we're always slightly creepy.
- I have so much to learn from you.
- But you're already so smart,
which is why I need you to harvest 20 pounds of potatoes
I planted at the supermarket.
- Coming right up.
- Thanks, Gulli-Billy.
- What did you say?
- Ah, I said you're like a son to me.
- Aw, you're like a moon to me.
- Please just go.
- [zooming]
- Billy, we've been looking for you.
Someone's been stealing vegetables
from the gardens in the neighborhood.
- What?
As a new member of the farming community,
that just makes me sick.
- Does the veggie bandit look familiar?
- No, but she's kinda cute.
- She's kinda you.
- What? That's crazy.
Now if you'll excuse me, I need to pick up some potatoes
Colosso planted at the supermarket.
- Billy, people don't plant stuff at supermarkets.
Dr. Colosso's duping you into stealing vegetables for him.
- Oh, no.
That cute girl is me?
That means I am gullible.
- No, you're a nice person who trusts people.
Colosso's the problem here,
which is why we are going to teach that evil bunny a lesson.
- Good idea.
I'll help--right after I get him his potatoes.
[zooming]
- I'll get him.
[whooshing]
- [dog growling]
- Let go of my Z Force partner, you dumb dog!
- [dog barking] - [gasps]
Fine, keep him!
He's as useless as the real Max.
- Phoebe, it's time to stop, collaborate, and listen.
- Wow, is it '90s day wherever parents hang out?
- As if.
We broke out our team spirit outfits to help you and Max.
- You guys are too legit to quit.
- All right, speak normal or I walk.
- Fine.
Let's, uh, just make sundaes and figure out a way
for you and Max to become all that and a bag of chips.
I'm sorry.
[clears throat]
- I mean, you guys should really be talking to Max about this.
He's the one who's straight-up buggin'.
[sighs] Now I'm doing it.
- There's nothing you can do to make yourself a better partner?
- No.
Oh, Dad, your hot fudge- to-ice-cream ratio is a mess.
- Hey, it's mine.
- Okay, just let me fix it, all right?
Efficiency equals delicious--
- Check yourself before you wreck yourself, Phoebe!
- [heavy thud]
- [plaster splatters]
- Wha...?
What was that about?
- Well, honey, you mean well,
but you can be a tad controlling--
like how you're taking sprinkles off
my ice cream right now.
- Okay, Mom, you can't just mix rainbow
and chocolate sprinkles because--oh!
Maybe I am controlling.
Ugh, I guess I should probably go apologize to Max
for being a bad teammate.
- Good idea, honey.
- PHOEBE: [sighs]
- She's gone, Hank.
- [chuckling]
Oh! I've got ceiling chips in my sundae.
[crunching] Not bad.
- Phoebe's crazy.
This air lair is great.
And so is Dad's burrito I found.
[laughs] Can't stop winning.
- Hey, Max.
- Winning streak over.
What are you doing here, Phoebe?
My guard owl was supposed to warn me about intruders.
- [owl hooting] - Too late, Desmond!
- Max, I came to apologize for being controlling.
I just really, really want this team to work.
But I promise, from here on out, no more schedules
and no more sneaking vitamins into your pizza.
- I knew I was getting strong teeth and bones.
- The point is, I'm sorry.
- [inhales]
I'm sorry, too.
Sorry I have a sister who thinks I'm selfish
and can't respect my pizza boundaries.
- Are you kidding me? You are selfish.
Look at this trash can on stilts.
- It's an air lair! [stomping foot]
- [tree fort rumbling, wood creaking]
- [board clattering] - [owl hoots]
- What's happening?
- Don't you hear my guard owl? We're at three hoots.
This place is falling apart! Go, go, go!
- [tree fort rumbling, creaking] - [ladder clatters]
- That crash you just heard was the sound of
your ladder breaking,
which means we have no way down unless you have a parachute.
- Why didn't you tell me that when I bought this thing?
- You didn't tell me you were buying it!
- [wood creaking, boards clattering]
- ¶ Old Colosso had a farm ¶
¶ Thanks to Gulli-Billy ¶
- Colosso, some police officers
accused me of stealing the vegetables
from around the neighborhood!
- Cops!
I mean, what did you tell the nice officers?
- The truth.
That you told me to take all of these veggies.
- [police siren] - COLOSSO: [gasps]
You rat! You led them right to me!
- Colosso, there are cops coming down here!
- Johnny Law'll never get me!
Adios, losers.
- [button beeps] - Aah!
- [small thud] - COLOSSO: Ooh!
[groaning]
Is this Albuquerque?
- Why don't you ask the sheriff?
- [whooshing] You're under arrest, baby.
- What's with the kindergarten cop?
- We set this whole thing up to teach you not to trick Billy.
- Enjoy your dinner, Uncle Dr. Gullible.
- Oh.
Uh, uh...looks like I succotash.
[groans] - [small thud]
- [wood creaking]
- This is horrible! - [tree fort rumbling]
- Not my burrito!
- Forget about your burrito. We're next.
- Phoebe, I--I'm sorry.
You were right about this whole tree fort thing.
It was a mistake.
I shouldn't have been so selfish.
- [boards clattering] - [wood creaking]
- Apologize later. This thing's going down.
- [wood creaking] - Hurry, we gotta jump!
- [tree fort rumbling]
- One, two--
- MAX & PHOEBE: [screaming]
[screaming continues]
- Why are we still yelling?
- I don't know! Let's get down.
- [powers whooshing]
- We just pulled off a telekinetic trust fall.
- I know.
We actually had each other's backs.
[sniffs] Phoebe? You smell that?
- Sure do.
It smells like team spirit.
- Well, I was gonna say it smells like
a dead squirrel burrito,
but maybe we do actually make a good team.
- Which means our Z Force dreams are still alive.
- And with a couple of nails,
our headquarters will be good as new.
- [wood creaking]
- [boards clattering]
- [metal clangs]
- Heh. Who needs a headquarters? - Not us.
- ¶