- ¶
- All right, Max. Think we can lift 500 pounds?
- Let's give it a shot. - Okay.
- BOTH: Ooh! Ooh! Huh!
[straining]
- This...this is nothin'.
- Oh, totally easy.
- Think we can stop now? - Yes, please!
Ah! See?
Told you we could sneak in a little pre-dinner workout.
Feeling the burn?
- My eyes burn from your workout stink.
- That would be you.
- [sniffs] Oh! You're right.
- We're crushing it, Max.
I really think this whole Z Force thing is gonna work out.
[laughs] Get it?
'Cause we're workin' out?
- I'm gonna hit you with a dumbbell.
Get it? 'Cause I'm gonna hit you with a dumbbell?
- All right.
- Speaking of dumbbells.
- What are you doing here, Max?
I thought you and the band had a show.
- Not till 6:00.
- I'm no time-a-matician,
but I'm pretty sure it's 6:00 right now.
- I don't think so, Cherry.
It's 6:30. [laughs]
6:30?!
Phoebe, how could you let this happen?
- I'm not your assistant!
- Not with that attitude, you're not!
I have to change.
- And shower!
Smell like an onion!
- HANK & CHLOE: No. Next. Pass.
- Kids, entertain us before my thumb falls off.
- Billy, this is our chance.
Let's do the Billy and Nora
comedy show we've been practicing.
- Right now?
If I'd known, I would've worn underwear.
- No, you wouldn't have. - It's true.
- Let the show begin.
- Hey, Nora. Let's go downstairs.
- Why are you taking the stairs?
The elevator's way faster.
Bing!
- [giggles] That's comedy gold.
- HANK & BARB: [laughing]
- I found my bow.
But where is my arrow?
- Found it!
- BARB: [laughing]
The kids are really funny.
- I know. They got it from me.
Knock-knock! - This is our show, old man.
- Hey, Nora.
Did you hear about the crab who only thought about himself?
- Sure did.
He was real...shellfish.
- Hey-yo!
- BARB & HANK: [laughing]
- MRS. WONG: [on TV] Hello, Hiddenville.
Do you like to laugh?
- Who doesn't? - I don't.
But if you do, then come on down to Splatterday Night Live.
- Why would we do that
when we have comedy right here in our own home?
- Every performer gets free burgers for their table.
- Kids, you're performing! Barb, bust out my burger bib!
- Perform in a crowded restaurant?
We can't do that.
- Too late. The bib is on.
- We're not gonna push the kids,
especially if they've got stage fright.
- We don't have stage fright. Right, Billy?
- Of course, we don't.
I'm definitely not afraid of looking ridiculous
like Dad in his weird neck diaper.
- There is nothing weird about a grown man
protecting his clothes.
- We're gonna do great.
We just need to go practice.
- But if we get up there and everyone laughs at us?
- That's what we want.
- We also want burgers.
Let's not forget about that.
They'd better not ruin this for us.
- The bib is on, baby!
- [palm slap]
- Guys, guys, guys! I'm sorry I'm late.
- Late? You missed the whole show.
This is totally not sweetious, broseph.
Wolfgang had to sing in your place.
- [high-pitched] ¶ Wolfgang ¶
Wolfgang!
- Eesh. It looks serious.
- Yeah, and private.
Let's go listen in.
- Look, guys, I can explain.
It was... all Phoebe's fault.
Yeah, she hogged the bathroom for hours,
pluckin' her face, or curlin' her forehead,
or whatever girls do in there.
- I thought your forehead looked extra curly.
Can you do mine?
- No, Cherry. That didn't happen.
I talked Max into a Z Force training session,
but he can't tell the band that.
- Phoebe's flawless beauty has nothing to do with this.
You've missed a bunch of shows.
My grandpa has been to more gigs than you.
- You ruined everything, Max Thunderman!
- Yeah, like yesterday.
We were supposed to work on band names.
But you were at the hospital
because Phoebe got her head stuck in a mayonnaise jar.
- You, too?
- Look, you're right, guys.
I'm really, really sorry.
- I'm just too upset to talk about it right now.
- If you're gonna cry, then I'm gonna cry.
[crying]
- [sobbing] Wolfgang crying, ja.
- His friends seem really upset.
- Not as upset as Grandpa Giddy.
- You're the worst, Max Thunderman!
- Oh, maybe I've been pushing Max too hard
with all this training.
I mean, what if they kick him out of the band because of me?
He won't wanna be my Z Force partner.
- They'd never kick Max out of the band.
- So it's decided.
We're kicking Max out of the band.
Oh, is this mic still on?
- Nope, didn't hear a thing.
- Hey, Gideon.
Remember when we took Phoebe to the heart tree?
- Okay, turn it off.
- ¶
¶ What you see ¶
¶ Is not what you get ¶
¶ Livin' our lives with a secret ¶
¶ We fit right in ¶
¶ Bet you never guessed ¶
¶ 'Cause we're livin' our lives ¶
¶ Just like all the rest ¶
¶ A picture perfect family ¶
¶ Is what we try to be ¶
¶ Look closer, you might see ¶
¶ The crazy things we do ¶
¶ This isn't make believe ¶
¶ It's our reality ¶
¶ Just your average family ¶
¶ Trying to be normal and stay out of trouble ¶
¶ Livin' a double life ¶¶
- You know, Phoebe, if things go bad with you and Max,
I can always be your new Z Force partner.
[grunting loudly]
Ooh, yeah. You'd better fix this thing with Max.
- Don't worry, Cherry.
Max isn't getting kicked out of the band,
because I came up with a plan.
- [gasps] Oh, I love a good Phoebe plan.
I also love a bad Phoebe plan.
I just love all the Phoebe plans.
- Here comes our little rocker now.
- Okay, Phoebe.
What's the big emergency?
- You're the big emergency.
But luckily, Dr. Phoebe's
got 20 cc's of help comin' your way.
- Hey, why is my band here?
- Hey, Max. Listen, man. We need to talk.
- What a great talk. Now that that's over, um...
Max has something he really wants to show you guys.
- I do?
- Yeah. Remember?
You felt terrible about bailing on the band,
and you wanted to surprise them with...
this!
A new rehearsal space!
- Oh, sweetious!
- There are no words.
- Wolfgang!
- You found a word.
- Wow.
This is so nice of me.
- It sure is.
You must really love your band.
- Thanks, Max.
You know, we were really starting to think
this was the fall of the broman empire.
- Yeah. I promised my grandpa
we were gonna kick you outta the band,
but this changes everything.
- I still don't like you, Max Thunderman!
- All right, Billy.
Let's see if we have all of our props for tonight's show--
string cheese...
horseshoe.
- Let's go, you two.
The sooner I hear your bad jokes,
the sooner I can hit you with my tomato cannon.
- Whatever.
We're gonna be great because we have a rubber chicken.
Where's our rubber chicken?
- It must be lost.
Guess we'll have to cancel the show.
- Or we could use a real chicken.
Dad always has one in his secret meat fridge.
- I see two chickens right here--
you and the one you're hiding behind your back.
- You caught me, Colosso.
Just don't tell Nora.
- Billy, let's have a chat over here...
in front of my tomato cannon.
- I don't see how that could go wrong.
- You clearly don't wanna go on stage at Splatburger.
- No, I do wanna go on stage.
But just thinking about it makes me wanna superspeed vomit.
You do not wanna see that.
- Is it weird that I do?
Eh, never mind.
Tell me more about your stage fright.
- I don't wanna let Nora down,
but performing in front of all those people
staring at me sounds terrifying.
- I feel the same way every time I have to go to the bathroom
in front of you people.
- But you go to the bathroom in front of us all the time.
- Not as much as I'd like to.
- What should I do?
- Well, you've got two choices.
"A," you tell Nora that you're a big-old scaredy baby.
- No. I can't do that.
I'm her hero.
- Okay.
That's definitely not true.
So, we'll go with "B,"
sabotage the act so you don't have to go up there on stage.
- How?
- I'll tell ya! But first...
- [tomato splats]
- Now you're afraid of tomatoes.
- Why are you--
- [tomato splats] - [gasps]
- [evil laughter] - [tomatoes splatting]
- Dance, funny boy! Dance!
- [gasps] - [tomatoes splatting]
- [band playing rock music]
- You hear that?
That's a Phoebe plan comin' together.
- Ooh, I love it when a Phoebe plan comes together!
I also love it when a Phoebe plan doesn't come together.
I just love all Phoebe plans.
- Phoebe, we need to talk.
Cherry, you can stay, but...don't.
- I'm no word-a-matician,
but I think you want me to leave.
- You, you, you!
- Yes, me, me, me.
- What did you do?
- I kept your friends from kicking you out of the band.
- But that is exactly what I wanted them to do.
I've been working on this for months.
And you ruined everything!
- [sighs] Yeah, right, what kind of psycho
tries to get themselves kicked out of their own band?
Oh, you.
- ¶
- Okay, wait, you were slacking off
so they would kick you out of the band?
Why would you do that? Why?
Just tell me one thing...why?
- Look, being in a band used to be one of my dreams--
that, and finding a way to make cats talk.
- Really? Cats?
- They're so sneaky.
What are they thinking?
Anyway, now Z Force is my dream.
- Wait.
So the band wanting to kick you out wasn't my fault?
Why'd you blame me?
- That was just more fun.
And I couldn't just quit the band.
- Why not? - Well, 'cause...
if I tell them I wanna quit,
they'll never talk to me again.
I'll lose my best friends.
- Max, just 'cause you quit the band
doesn't mean they'll never talk to you again.
- Oh, yeah?
What happened to Cornelius when he left One Direction?
- Who? - Exactly!
But if the band kicks you out,
they feel bad, and the friendship lives on.
- Okay, that can't be how bands work.
- It is, and you would know that if you were a musical person.
- Um, you know I spent last summer at pan flute camp.
I was the best one there.
I was the only one there.
- Do you know how hard it's gonna be
to get them all mad at me again with this face?
Look at this face, Phoebe!
- One of your eyebrows is longer than the other.
- Quiet! I need to think.
- Oh! I'll play you some thinking music.
- [plays "Greensleeves" badly]
- Wanna know what I'm thinkin' now?
- That you wanna break my pan flute?
- Actually, you gave me an idea.
The band will definitely kick me out
if I just book the worst gig ever.
I just need to find a place as annoying as your pan flute.
- [carnival music playing]
- Welcome to the Merry Meerkat.
- This place isn't annoying. It's adorable.
- MEERKAT: Come on, kids, follow me!
- KIDS: [screaming]
- Aw, hi. Look at this little angel.
- [heavy thud] - Oh!
[gasps] Okay. This might work.
- ¶
- Ew. My burger has a bone in it.
- Mm, a free bone.
- Why do we keep coming here?
- Live from Hiddenville, it's Splatterday Night!
It's the who's who of the who cares?!
I'm your host, Mrs. Wong.
Uh, before we get started, anyone here from out of town?
You're not better than us. Put your hand down.
- Ha, ha, ha, ha!
- What are you laughing at, neck diaper?
- BARB: [laughing]
It does look like a diaper. [laughs]
- Okay, our first performer tonight
is some kind of comedy ghost.
- I'm a mime.
- Mimes don't talk, dummy.
- What was it Colosso said I had to do to Nora?
- I told you to sabotage the act!
- Thanks, Colosso.
Wait, you're in my head?
- Yep, and there's room to spare.
I've been walking around here for hours.
Haven't seen a single thought.
- Have you met Major Monkey yet?
You'll know him when you see him.
- COLOSSO: Focus!
Unless you want to perform,
you'd better go rattle Nora's confidence
and keep her off that stage.
- Got it.
- Uh...you hear voices, too, huh?
Because if you don't, then neither do I.
[chuckling]
- CROWD: [booing]
- Wow. Tough crowd, Nora.
Are you sure we should do this?
- They're supposed to boo.
He's some sort of comedy ghost.
- I said I'm a mime!
- Our act is way better.
- Up next, ugh, those Thunderbrats, Billy and Nora.
Let me guess.
Your father forced you to come so he could eat free food.
- You don't have to answer that!
- It's show time, Billy!
How are you doin' tonight, Hiddenville?
Hey, Billy.
What do you call a lemon in need?
Well, that's our time.
You've been a lovely audience. Bye!
- Wow! Well, I guess I'd better kill some time.
So, a family of rats walked into Splatburger.
That's not a joke. It really happened.
- [polka music playing]
- All right, I know I should've minded my own business.
But did I really have to carry all your band's equipment?
- Not all. I carried my pick.
- PHOEBE: Oh.
- Good, the band's here.
They're definitely gonna kick me out when they see this place.
- OYSTER: Hey, bro. We got your text.
- Good. Grab your instruments,
'cause we're the new Meerkat Fun Time Happy Band!
- You want us to rock out here?
- Whoa, not cool, Max.
I would kick you out of my band for this,
but also totally stay friends with you.
- So?
Are you guys mad?
- Yeah, we're mad...
that you didn't come up with this idea sooner!
- Now they can't tell us we're too old to be here.
- GIDEON & WOLFGANG: [laugh]
- Oh, good. I knew you'd like it.
- Come on, let's rock the snot outta these kids.
- Wait, wait! There's something else.
- [gasps] Where does it end, Max?
Definitely with friendship.
- And this thing might be a deal breaker.
[laughs]
- I am never taking this off!
- I just wanna snuggle myself.
- So soften.
- That's it. I'm gonna do the worst thing imaginable.
Hey, guys.
My sister's joining the band. - What?
- Huh? - Wolfgang?
- Yeah. It's cool.
In fact, it's...
pantastic! [plays a few notes]
- Max, we can't have a sister in the band,
especially one who used to be in love with me.
- That could create a huge hole in the brozone layer.
- Sorry, guys, either we spend our lives
being the world's worst pan flute rock band...
- [plays one note]
- ...or you guys kick me out.
- Band huddle.
- This is it!
- Max, you're out...
of your mind if you think we don't love that idea!
- Band cuddle! - Woo!
- ¶
- Come on, Billy. Come out.
- [British accent] Billy's not here.
I'm Belvedere, the talking burger.
- [lasers zapping] - Ow!
- Billy, just tell me what's going on.
- Fine.
Nora, I know I'm your hero
and you think I have it all together--
- You're wearing two different shoes.
- The truth is...
[sighs]
I have stage fright.
- So that's why you've been acting weird.
Billy, it's perfectly normal to be a little bit scared.
- It is?
Is it normal that I took a bite out of that plastic burger?
- One problem at a time.
For now let's fix your stage fright.
- But what about all those people staring at me?
- Don't worry. I think I have a way.
You won't even know they're there.
- You give it lemonade!
Hey-yo!
- CROWD: [laughing]
- Hey, Billy.
Did you hear about the jungle cat who won at poker?
- Sure did.
He was a big cheetah!
- CROWD: [laughing]
- [laughs] What a great night.
The kids are hilarious.
- And we got free burgers.
- Uh, the burgers are free, but the buns are $20 each.
- Please tell me this is part of the comedy act.
- For me it is!
Hey-yo! [cackling]
- ¶ The cow eats bamboo ¶
¶ Then it goes poo ¶
¶ The pot-bellied pig ¶
¶ It goes boo-hoo-hoo ¶
¶
- We are the Meerkat Fun Time Happy Band!
Hope you're having a great time.
On vocals, It's Maxaroo!
- Hey, I'm having a hoppin' good time.
- On guitar, it's Giraffester!
- [electric guitar solo] - KIDS: [screaming]
- Hanging out over here on the keyboard,
it's Gideon J. Rhino.
- [keyboard solo]
- And all the way from Germany, Wolfgang,
which I've been told is German for gecko!
- [drum solo]
- And who's that girl
who's been blowin' your mind on the pan flute?
It's Phoebe Frogaby!
- KIDS: [screaming] - [pan flute solo]
- ¶ The horse goes neigh ¶
¶ When it wants some hay ¶
¶ The farmer feeds the horse ¶
¶ Then it's play, play, play ¶¶
- CROWD: [cheering & applause]
- Thank you, meerkitties!
Good night!
Oh?
Uh, and, uh, if you happen to have lost
a child in the ball pit,
please claim him at the front desk. Thank you.
They should be beyond embarrassed after that gig.
- That gig was amazing.
Did you see those moms?
- And those grandmas. Woo!
- Phoebe, come here.
Now what?
It's like everything I do, they just love me more.
- Of course they do, Max.
They're your friends.
Nothing you do can kanga-ruin that.
Sorry.
Seriously, just go tell them
you don't wanna be in the band anymore.
- No. You can't make me.
- Uh, yes I can. Hop to it!
- [powers whooshing] - Stop...making...me...hop!
Hey, guys.
I have something to say.
And you might want to sit down to hear this.
- I don't think we can in these costumes.
- Okay. Um, look...
I'm really sorry to say this, but...
I don't wanna be in the band anymore.
- Oh.
Well, I've actually been thinking about
quitting the band, too.
- You have?
- Yeah, so I can spend more time with Cherry.
I'm hoping some of her smarts will rub off on me.
- I was thinking about quitting, too.
Grandpa Giddy and I are shooting our own reality show--
"Keeping Up With the Giddys."
- Coming this fall!
- Okay, so, we're all good with quitting?
- Please, no quitten!
- It sounds like Wolfgang's on board, too!
I guess none of us said anything
because we wanted to make sure we stayed friends.
Hmph.
That means we always will.
- Always, broseph.
- Heh heh.
- [pan flute music]
- [heavy thud]
- Whose...child is that?
- ¶