- [dramatic music]
*
- PHOEBE & MAX: [scream] Shhhh!
- Quiet. The whole world's gonna know I missed curfew.
It's gonna be your fault. - I missed curfew, too.
I was out trying to find a club that would let my band play.
- Oh, well, I missed curfew-- - Don't care!
- [bag swats arm] - Ow.
Go check if the coast is clear.
- [crickets chirping]
- Mom is right on the other side of that door
with her "waiting up" blanket.
We're in so much trouble. - You know what?
Why are a couple of supes sneakin' around anyway?
We should just man up, go in there,
and tell Mom what we think of her "curfew."
- You're right. We should handle this like mature adults.
[takes deep breath]
Okay, Mom, I know we're late, but--
- What do you mean "we"? - Well...
- Phoebe, you're over an hour late.
Do you know how worried your father and I were?
- HANK: Oh, television...
I don't have a care in the world when you're on.
- Do you know how worried I was?
- Mother, shall we sit?
We shall not.
Mom, here's the thing--
I'm not a little kid anymore.
Heck, I'm the protector of Hiddenville.
If something went wrong, I would call myself.
- I know you think you can take care of yourself,
but I am still responsible for you.
Do you understand? - Not even a little bit.
So, I guess we'll agree to disagree.
- How about we agree to ground you for a week?
- Well, that escalated quickly.
Seriously? A week?
- Yeah. Why don't you call yourself and get outta that?
- Come on, Mom!
- Would you guys please keep it down?
I'm trying to sleep.
- Sorry, sweetie.
Phoebe, you're double-grounded for waking your brother up.
- Oh?!
- *
* What you see
* Is not what you get
* Livin' our lives with a secret *
* We fit right in
* Bet you never guessed
* 'Cause we're livin' our lives *
* Just like all the rest
* A picture perfect family *
* Is what we try to be
* Look closer, you might see *
* The crazy things we do
* This isn't make believe *
* It's our reality
* Just your average family
* Trying to be normal and stay out of trouble *
* Livin' a double life *
- [sighing] There's nothing on.
Oh, Dad, do you need anything from the store?
I can go get it.
- Shhhh! I can't be seen talking to you.
You're gonna get me grounded. - Dad!
- Sorry, honey, but the only way you're gettin' outta here
is on a superhero mission.
Just, uh, watch some TV.
- [sighing] TV's boring.
- [gasping] Now you're bad-mouthing TV?
You deserve being grounded.
- Wait? All I need's a mission, huh?
Thunder Monitor, emergency call to President Kickbutt.
- COMPUTER VOICE: Calling Super President Kickbutt.
- Phoebe, this had better be important.
I'm having quiet time at home.
- [rock music blaring]
- Simone, turn that song off, please!
- [music stops]
- Uh, I was wondering if you had a mission for me?
- Phoebe, this is my one day off a month.
I just want some peace and--
- [rock music blaring]
- Simone! - [music stops]
- Oh, look, a mission just came across the wire.
[imitates computer beeping]
The Hero League wants you to
take Simone off my hands for the evening.
- Oh, uh, that sounds--
- Good. I'm sending her to you right now.
- Oh, hey, Phoebe!
[whooshing]
Mom, you can't keep doing that!
- You're Phoebe's mission now.
Super President Kickbutt... out...
- I hope your parents are cooler than mine.
- They are not--which is why we are leaving.
- Oh, hey, Simone. What are you doing here?
- She's my "mission."
Super President Kickbutt wanted me to take her out.
It sounded very serious-- there were beeps.
- Super President Kickbutt, huh?
Okay, well, you can go on your little mission,
but if you don't make curfew tonight,
you're gonna be triple-grounded.
- Three weeks?
Those are Max numbers.
- Enjoy your mission.
You're on "Mom Time" now.
- Moms, am I right? - Totally useless.
Now wait here, I'm gonna go put on
this really cute outfit she bought me yesterday.
- Hi, Max.
- Well, well, well, if it isn't Simone Kickbutt--
--er Cumberbatch.
Guys, this is Simone, a completely normal teenager
whose parents are totally unimportant.
- Any relation to Mike Kickbutter-Cumberbatch?
- No, no relation.
So, what are you doing here?
- She must have heard about our first club gig--
which we booked just in time.
We had a pact that if we didn't
play a club by tonight, we'd break up.
- Speaking of breaking up, Max,
is your mom still with that dude?
- You mean my dad?
Not cool, Gideon.
- [German accent] Wolfgang?
- Sure, I'd love to see you guys play.
I've been to Germany.
- Okay, uh, well, I just texted you the address.
- And I am definitely not texting Barb the address.
- [long, slow slurp]
- You really seem to be enjoying that cocoa.
- Oh, I finished it five minutes ago.
I'm just trying to wait them out.
Okay, you win. What's with the costumes?
- It's not about the costumes.
We're here on business.
- Yeah, it's o-fish-ial business.
- What this clown fish is trying to say
is we want a pet.
- Oh. - Oh, ho, here we go.
You guys have tried this song and dance before.
- Not this one. Hit it, Billy.
- * Buy us a pet
* Be the best guys ever
- * Buy us a pet
* It's meow or never
- * What we're trying to say
- * In our adorable way is
- * Buy us a pet right now
- BOTH: [long, slow slurp]
- Seriously? Nothing?
- I'm sorry, but you guys are just not ready for a pet...
or Broadway.
- That's right. It's a huge responsibility.
- We were afraid you would say that,
and we would like to counter with this...
- Pwease, Mommy, Daddy?
- Oh, ho, ho, ho. - Oh...
- Must...fight...cuteness.
- All right, listen, why don't you guys
take care of Dr. Colosso for the weekend?
If he says you're responsible pet owners,
then...we'll...get ya a pet.
- NORA, BILLY, CHLOE: Yay!
- Sorry, Barb, but you knew adorable children
were a risk when you married me.
- Simone, I'm telling you, Splatburger is not a club.
It's barely a restaurant.
- [electronic music playing]
- That is now a club.
I can't believe Mrs. Wong
would turn her restaurant into a nightclub.
- MAX: She didn't...
I did!
Welcome to Club Splatz.
- Why is it always you?
- Well, since I couldn't find a club
that would let our band play, I opened my own,
and when we rock out tonight,
our band won't have to split up.
- So, you just broke into Splatburger?
- [exaggerated gasp] How dare you!
I stole the key. - Hm...
- You guys have fun now.
- All right, we should go.
Your mom would not like you partying at an illegal club.
- Yeah, because she worries too much--
just like your mom.
- Tell me about it. I'm triple-grounded?
I am a superhero, dang it.
- Great! Then we're staying.
Simone, out!
- Wait!
I can't miss curfew, so meet me at the door at 10:00.
- Got it. Now I'm out.
- Okay, just please don't hit me with your--
hair.
- [reading] "And then the wicked witch
"put the pretty princess to sleep forever and ever...
The End."?
- Ha! I love evil fairytales.
- Enjoy your healthy vegetables, Colosso.
- Well, isn't that lovely.
Huh! - [tray clatters]
- I don't want that garbage!
I want deep-dish pizza from Chicago.
- Bunny food only.
We have to show mom and dad we're responsible pet owners.
- Fine.
Hank! Barb!
The kids are starving me!
- Okay, if we get you what you want,
will you say we're good pet owners?
- I don't make any promises 'til I see the goods.
- [zooming]
- Oh, yeah!
Let's do this!
[chomping, slurping]
- How does his little mouth open so wide?
- What's happening to him?
- Uh...
I think I'm a tad bloated.
- A tad?
You're a bunny blimp.
- Guess I can't process cheese like I used to.
Good to know.
- Have any of you guys seen Simone?
She was supposed to meet me by the door,
but I can't find her.
- Did you check Club Splatz's Velvet Members Only VIP Room?
- You mean the kitchen?
- And that's why you'll never be a member.
- I tried to get in, but that guy won't let me past.
- That's because you're not a very important person.
You're a very... annoying person.
And that group's over there.
- [electronic music playing]
- Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow!
She's with me, Enrico.
Ow! Ow! Ow!
Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow!
- Oh, there she is...
- [air whooshing]
- ...throwing a chicken up the garbage chute.
- [laughing] Bye-bye, birdie!
- Simone, where were you?
I waited at the door for like 20 minutes.
- Oh, well, I was just having so much fun with this
that I suddenly didn't care that you were waiting.
- Well, we're going. I don't wanna miss curfew.
- You can go. I'm staying.
- I'm not leaving you here mid-mission.
I have to make sure you get home safe.
Oh, real mature.
- BOTH: Nya!
- Okay, you two are outta here.
I'm gettin' complaints--
mostly from me.
But you're killin' the vibe in the VIP Room.
- Okay, it's a kitchen with a garbage hole in the ceiling.
It's time to go, Missy.
- Missy? Pu-lease.
I'm not going anywhere.
- [air whooshing] - SIMONE: [screaming]
- Ho, ho.
That's what the sign meant.
- Simone, are you okay?
- SIMONE: What do you think?
- This is awful.
How am I gonna get her back and make curfew?
- You know who you should talk to about this problem?
Anyone but me.
- Wait. You have to help me get Simone back.
- Well, I've gotta go play this gig.
Me and my band can stay together
and become legendary bad boy rockers.
One question-- collar up or down?
- You know, I, uh, sure would hate for Mom to find out
you broke into Splatburger and turned it into a club.
- Pfft, you think telling on me's gonna work?
- [phone beeps] - Call Mom.
- Stop that! - [phone beeps]
- Okay, let's make this quick.
Oh, there's a reverse lever.
- Uh, okay, uh, I will pull it with my telekinesis
and when this thing spits Simone out, we'll catch her.
- Yeah.
- [chute rattling]
- Here she comes.
- A perfectly-wrapped burger?
I accept your trade, trash chute.
- COLOSSO: [sighing, farting]
- Sorry, Colosso,
but we can't let Mom and Dad see you like this,
or we'll never get a pet.
- We have to cover you up until we figure out
how to fix...this. - COLOSSO: [farting]
Ah, relax. Nobody ever comes down here.
- BARB: Kids, we're coming down there.
- Hey, we just came down to check on you guys.
- Yeah, Colosso, how are they doing?
- Don't. He's asleep.
- And as responsible pet owners,
we can't let you disturb his peace and quiet.
- COLOSSO: [long, slow fart]
- Uh, that was me. My tummy's bubbly.
- Aw, well, come on, sweetie.
Let's fix up your tummy with a little ginger tea.
- [whispering] You owe me.
- How do we fix your tummy, bubble boy?
- We need to force out this gas
by filling me up with more fart fuel.
- Wait? So we should give you more gas?
I thought my body was confusing.
- Just bring me beans--
and lots of 'em.
- [zooming]
[zooming]
- Okay, you kids know the drill.
[chomping, slurping]
- SIMONE: Are you guys still there?
- Uh, yeah.
Uh, Phoebe and I are just trying to find
a way to get you out of wherever you are.
- [German accent] Founden Maxen.
- There you are, bro.
What are you doing in here? We've gotta play.
- Yeah, much like my love life, this club is "one night only."
- Dude, your love life is "no night only."
- Look, guys, I just need a second.
In the meantime, do something entertaining until I get there.
- Wolfgang!
Huh! Huh! Huh! Huh!
Huh!
- Hey, someone in your band is talented.
All right, I searched the whole restaurant
and I can't figure out where this garbage chute leads.
- All right, new plan. [powers zapping]
You are gonna go up there to get Simone,
and I'm gonna pull you guys out.
- Why don't you go up the chute and I pull you out?
- Because I come with friends--
"Venus" and "Serena"!
Make like that sign and stand on the "X."
- Max, do not...let go... of the cord.
- Don't worry. We won't.
- [air whooshing]
- [straining]
Don't give up, Venus!
Don't...
Whoa!
- PHOEBE: Oh! - MAX: Whoa!
I didn't let go of the cord.
- Hey, guys, do you want some tea?
We had cookies, but Chloe ate them all.
- There's no crumbs on my face.
- What's Colosso doing up here?
- Mom, Dad, we need your help.
Look...
- BARB: [gasps]
- COLOSSO: No...
[gurgly voice] ...don't look at me.
- We really tried to be good pet owners.
- Honey, I think you failed.
- Oh, this is it, I'm gonna blow!
[stomach gurgling]
Oh...oh...oh...
Ahh!
- Take cover!
- [stomach gurgling]
[continuous fart]
Whoa! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh!
Ow! - [teapot rattles]
- [farts] - ALL: Ohhh!!
- Whew!
- All right, nobody light a match for at least an hour.
- Yeah, we don't want a pet anymore.
- There's no door down there.
But I did find another burger.
- Great. We're trapped in here.
- Wait, you losers can give up,
but I'm playing my club gig tonight.
- Well, Simone, I hope you're happy.
- Why would I be happy?
I'm gonna be picking pork scraps outta my super heels for a week.
- None of this would have happened
if you had just met me at the door on time.
I was worried sick about you.
- "Kobe," "LeBron," get in the game!
I've gotta get up... just a little higher.
[groaning] Whew.
[groaning]
- Look, Simone, I know you think you can take care of yourself,
but I'm the one who's responsible for you.
Wait. Where have I heard this before?
- Blah, blah, blah, blabbity, blah, blah,
still responsible for you.
- Oh, that's where I heard it.
- [alarm ringing] - What's happening?
- The walls are closing in.
- The room must be a giant trash compactor.
It's gonna smash us into a brick of trash.
- Haven't I been through enough?
And you guys, too.
- [metal creaking]
- We've gotta get up through that hole in the ceiling.
- As my mad hops have already proven--
it's way too high up.
- Not for someone with Kickbutt power.
Simone can superkick us straight up
through the hole in the ceiling.
If we're all tied together, we'll all fly up together.
- I'm in. I love kicking butts.
- Here, Max, tie this cord around yourself.
- Okay.
- Good. Now let Simone kick you in the butt.
- What? No! Why can't she kick you?
- Because it hurts.
- Well, she's not kicking me.
- I'll choose. Eeeny, meeny, miny--
kick butt! - PHOEBE: [screams]
- Why does that cord hate me?
- [metal creaking]
- BOTH: [heavy thuds]
- We did it!
Oh, and I can't feel my butt.
Wait, now I can.
Ow!
- MAX: Help! I'm being smooshed!
- Oh, no, Max!
- [heavy thud] - What was that thud?
- It came from the alley outside.
- MAX: I don't see what's so funny.
- [phone camera clicks]
- [laughing] Can you see it now?
- Get outta my way.
I'm still doin' my gig.
You can't stop rock 'n roll.
You can squish it into a dirty little cube of trash,
but you can't stop it.
- All right, I can still make curfew,
so, now are you ready to go?
- Yeah.
You shouldn't have brought me
to this illegal club in the first place.
What were you thinking?
- Hey, where are you going?
Get those box cutters you call elbows over here
and get me outta this thing.
- [powers zapping] - Whoaaaa!
You're banned from Club Splatz!
- See you later, Simone.
Never again.
- Well, you're home.
No groundings tonight, blankie.
- Mom, I'm really sorry I broke curfew the other night.
I should have respected your wishes
and come home on time.
- Aw, thank you.
So, does that mean you're never gonna break curfew again?
- Well, I wouldn't say that. [laughing]
But I promise I'll call, if I'm gonna be late.
- Aw, good enough.
- [watch beeps] - Mom O'Clock.
Max is officially late for curfew.
Do you have any idea where he is?
- As a matter of fact, I do.
- [rock 'n roll "noise"]
- Not sure that counts as playin', bro.
- It counts. The band stays together.
- [music stops]
- Whazzup, Barb?
I see you came alone.
- I'm grounding your lead singer for a long time.
- Keep playin', guys.
You can't ground rock 'n roll.
Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow!
- *