1
00:00:01,368 --> 00:00:02,001
I'm home!
2
00:00:02,003 --> 00:00:05,270
Adult adam: My dad was
the least complicated guy
on the planet.
3
00:00:05,272 --> 00:00:07,039
His first order
of business
4
00:00:07,041 --> 00:00:08,807
Was to always
be comfortable.
5
00:00:08,809 --> 00:00:11,910
That meant parking his pants
at the door.
6
00:00:11,912 --> 00:00:15,180
His hobbies included
sleeping in his chair...
7
00:00:15,182 --> 00:00:16,615
(snoring)
8
00:00:16,617 --> 00:00:17,950
...Watching fantasy island.
9
00:00:17,952 --> 00:00:18,884
Oh, don't worry, boss.
10
00:00:18,886 --> 00:00:20,185
Adult adam:
Sleeping in his chair...
11
00:00:20,187 --> 00:00:21,420
Oh!
...Yelling at the phillies...
12
00:00:21,422 --> 00:00:22,788
(shouting)
what is that pitch?
13
00:00:22,790 --> 00:00:24,890
...And sleeping in his chair.
(snorts)
14
00:00:24,892 --> 00:00:27,426
Even his parenting style
was simple
15
00:00:27,428 --> 00:00:29,895
And always involved
choice vocab words.
16
00:00:29,897 --> 00:00:32,564
Hey, you morons.
Stop being morons.
17
00:00:32,566 --> 00:00:34,066
Unreal.
I raised a moron.
18
00:00:34,068 --> 00:00:35,501
Why you got to be a moron
all the time?
19
00:00:35,503 --> 00:00:37,136
He wasn't
a complicated guy
20
00:00:37,138 --> 00:00:38,337
Or, frankly,
even that interesting.
21
00:00:38,339 --> 00:00:39,671
But every once in a while,
22
00:00:39,673 --> 00:00:41,273
He was accidentally reveal
23
00:00:41,275 --> 00:00:41,974
Something about himself
24
00:00:41,976 --> 00:00:44,743
That would make you feel
like you didn't know him
at all.
25
00:00:44,745 --> 00:00:46,712
All right, all fixed.
Wow!
26
00:00:46,714 --> 00:00:48,480
Where did you learn
how to do that?
27
00:00:48,482 --> 00:00:50,349
Army.
28
00:00:50,351 --> 00:00:51,350
What?
29
00:00:51,352 --> 00:00:52,751
Did you say "army"?
30
00:00:52,753 --> 00:00:55,587
Dad, is this you
and lou reed?
31
00:00:55,589 --> 00:00:57,923
Yeah, we, uh,
waited tables together.
32
00:00:57,925 --> 00:00:59,491
What? Tell me more.
33
00:00:59,493 --> 00:01:01,994
Eh, it was
a whole thing.
34
00:01:01,996 --> 00:01:05,731
Wait! Come back!
I want to know you!
35
00:01:05,733 --> 00:01:08,333
(video game beeping)
36
00:01:08,335 --> 00:01:11,070
Pull up! Pull up!
You're gonna crash
the plane.
37
00:01:11,072 --> 00:01:13,505
I was in a plane crash once.
38
00:01:14,941 --> 00:01:15,808
Nap time.
39
00:01:15,810 --> 00:01:19,344
Adult adam:
Yep, some people
glorify the past,
40
00:01:19,346 --> 00:01:20,245
But not my dad.
41
00:01:20,247 --> 00:01:22,414
To him, it's like
it never even happened.
42
00:01:22,416 --> 00:01:24,316
Oh, my god, murray,
you're not gonna
believe it.
43
00:01:24,318 --> 00:01:26,518
I just got off the phone
with your old high school.
44
00:01:26,520 --> 00:01:28,487
Your record
has been broken.
45
00:01:28,489 --> 00:01:31,523
Whoa, wait.
Dad had a record
in high school?
46
00:01:31,525 --> 00:01:32,791
What kind of record?
47
00:01:32,793 --> 00:01:33,692
Chili! He loves chili.
48
00:01:33,694 --> 00:01:35,594
It's something to do
with chili.
49
00:01:35,596 --> 00:01:37,096
True, but that's not it.
50
00:01:37,098 --> 00:01:38,197
Your dad set the record
51
00:01:38,199 --> 00:01:40,599
For most free throws
in a row
52
00:01:40,601 --> 00:01:42,067
At central high.
53
00:01:42,069 --> 00:01:43,435
Like, in basketball?
54
00:01:43,437 --> 00:01:44,803
What... What are you
talking about?
55
00:01:44,805 --> 00:01:46,238
What can I say?
We won state.
56
00:01:46,240 --> 00:01:49,475
Uh, I hit 79 free throws
in a row.
57
00:01:49,477 --> 00:01:50,976
Uh, what do you
want from me?
58
00:01:50,978 --> 00:01:52,878
Murray, the high school
wants you to go back
59
00:01:52,880 --> 00:01:55,848
So they can honor you
at the game Saturday night.
60
00:01:55,850 --> 00:01:58,050
We get to stay downtown,
61
00:01:58,052 --> 00:02:01,220
And there's gonna be
a banquet.
62
00:02:01,222 --> 00:02:01,820
A banquet?
63
00:02:01,822 --> 00:02:04,289
That's the fanciest
of all food parties!
64
00:02:04,291 --> 00:02:06,325
I know!
It's a very big deal.
65
00:02:06,327 --> 00:02:08,227
Here's the thing
about that.
66
00:02:08,229 --> 00:02:09,094
Pass.
67
00:02:09,096 --> 00:02:09,928
No pass.
Pass!
68
00:02:09,930 --> 00:02:11,964
I already told them
you'd be there.
Why would you do that?
69
00:02:11,966 --> 00:02:14,099
You know I don't have
an interest in things.
70
00:02:14,101 --> 00:02:14,800
Is this for real?
71
00:02:14,802 --> 00:02:17,536
I mean, we've never even
seen you touch a basketball.
72
00:02:17,538 --> 00:02:19,238
Yeah, I mean,
I can't believe this.
73
00:02:19,240 --> 00:02:21,540
It's one of my dreams
to play in the nba,
74
00:02:21,542 --> 00:02:23,308
And you never
once mentioned it?
75
00:02:23,310 --> 00:02:25,110
Didn't see
how it was relevant.
76
00:02:25,112 --> 00:02:26,945
Oh, it's relevant.
77
00:02:26,947 --> 00:02:28,780
What you gonna do?
What you gonna do?
78
00:02:28,782 --> 00:02:32,751
Huh? Huh?
What you gonna do?
What you gonna do?
79
00:02:32,753 --> 00:02:34,419
Not much more
than what I'm doing
right now.
80
00:02:34,421 --> 00:02:37,389
I want you to show me
what you got,
free-throw king!
81
00:02:37,391 --> 00:02:38,290
Are we, uh,
done here yet?
82
00:02:38,292 --> 00:02:42,227
No! You were clearly
some type of popular
high school god.
83
00:02:42,229 --> 00:02:43,128
Tell me
what it was like.
84
00:02:43,130 --> 00:02:46,798
I don't know.
I, uh, dated a lot of girls.
85
00:02:46,800 --> 00:02:47,432
I went to parties.
86
00:02:47,434 --> 00:02:49,801
I got elected
class president
a few times.
87
00:02:49,803 --> 00:02:51,970
Lunch lady gave me
free jell-o.
88
00:02:51,972 --> 00:02:52,538
Eh, the usual.
89
00:02:52,540 --> 00:02:55,874
Not usual.
That's the opposite
of my life.
90
00:02:55,876 --> 00:02:56,475
The lunch lady said
91
00:02:56,477 --> 00:02:58,844
I look like the warlord
who burnt down her village.
92
00:02:58,846 --> 00:03:00,812
I'm going in.
No, wait, wait! Come on!
93
00:03:00,814 --> 00:03:02,047
I thought you were gonna
give me some pointers.
94
00:03:02,049 --> 00:03:04,483
Unless you want me
to give you some.
95
00:03:04,485 --> 00:03:08,153
How about
from way downtown?
96
00:03:08,155 --> 00:03:09,454
Hope you brought
an umbrella,
97
00:03:09,456 --> 00:03:12,925
'cause it's about to
rain some 3s!
98
00:03:13,193 --> 00:03:14,927
Swish, baby!
99
00:03:14,929 --> 00:03:15,994
Fundamentals!
100
00:03:15,996 --> 00:03:18,096
Intangibles!
101
00:03:18,098 --> 00:03:19,765
Unselfish!
102
00:03:19,767 --> 00:03:21,600
Basketball!
103
00:03:21,602 --> 00:03:24,236
And that's
how you do it.
104
00:03:24,238 --> 00:03:25,537
♪ I'm twisted up inside
105
00:03:25,539 --> 00:03:30,842
♪ but nonetheless
I feel the need to say
106
00:03:31,744 --> 00:03:32,844
♪ I don't know the future
107
00:03:32,846 --> 00:03:37,482
♪ but the past keeps getting
clearer every day ♪
108
00:03:37,484 --> 00:03:38,550
'sup, lexy bloom?
109
00:03:38,552 --> 00:03:41,920
Ready to break the seal
on this new yearbook,
or what?
110
00:03:41,922 --> 00:03:42,554
Uh, sure.
111
00:03:42,556 --> 00:03:45,157
Adult adam:
This year, barry left
an entire page blank
112
00:03:45,159 --> 00:03:47,593
For the one signature
he cared about...
113
00:03:47,595 --> 00:03:50,062
His dream girl, lexy bloom.
114
00:03:50,064 --> 00:03:53,298
"have a bitchin' summer,
gustav?"
115
00:03:53,300 --> 00:03:55,033
I'm not the swedish
exchange student!
116
00:03:55,035 --> 00:03:57,669
I'm speaking english
to you!
117
00:04:00,707 --> 00:04:01,673
Swing and a miss.
118
00:04:01,675 --> 00:04:04,176
Aw, you love her,
and she thinks
you're from sweden.
119
00:04:04,178 --> 00:04:06,111
I've spent all year
trying to make
a name for myself,
120
00:04:06,113 --> 00:04:09,214
And lexy bloom
still doesn't know
who I am.
121
00:04:09,216 --> 00:04:09,881
She's so lucky.
122
00:04:09,883 --> 00:04:14,052
If only there was a way to,
like, have a casual
get-together
123
00:04:14,054 --> 00:04:16,688
With the coolest kids
from school,
124
00:04:16,690 --> 00:04:17,656
Like, at our house,
125
00:04:17,658 --> 00:04:19,424
But without the formal,
sit-down dinner.
126
00:04:19,426 --> 00:04:20,592
I think
you're describing a party.
127
00:04:20,594 --> 00:04:23,528
Oh, my god.
I have the greatest idea.
128
00:04:23,530 --> 00:04:25,230
I'm gonna throw a party.
129
00:04:25,232 --> 00:04:27,699
Mom and dad
are staying downtown
Saturday night.
130
00:04:27,701 --> 00:04:28,934
(gasps)
I'll invite the whole school!
131
00:04:28,936 --> 00:04:31,737
Whoa, hold on.
Uh, I want you
to think about this...
132
00:04:31,739 --> 00:04:33,705
High-school friends!
133
00:04:33,707 --> 00:04:34,740
This Saturday night,
134
00:04:34,742 --> 00:04:36,341
I'm inviting you
to the best party
135
00:04:36,343 --> 00:04:39,344
In the history
of william penn academy,
136
00:04:39,346 --> 00:04:40,779
Thrown by yours truly!
137
00:04:40,781 --> 00:04:42,414
Boy: We love you, gustav!
138
00:04:42,416 --> 00:04:45,183
No! I'm barry goldberg!
139
00:04:45,185 --> 00:04:46,218
Doesn't matter!
140
00:04:46,220 --> 00:04:48,520
Party at my place!
141
00:04:48,522 --> 00:04:49,621
Adult adam:
For the next few days,
142
00:04:49,623 --> 00:04:52,391
Barry spread the word
all over school.
143
00:04:52,393 --> 00:04:53,558
It was gonna be
a wild rager,
144
00:04:53,560 --> 00:04:55,927
And nobody
was more excited
than me.
145
00:04:55,929 --> 00:04:58,597
Oh, man.
My first high-school party
146
00:04:58,599 --> 00:05:02,401
With r-rated language
and adult situations.
147
00:05:02,403 --> 00:05:05,337
This is my "risky business."
148
00:05:05,339 --> 00:05:05,937
Damn right!
149
00:05:05,939 --> 00:05:08,974
There's gonna be dancing,
fistfights,
150
00:05:08,976 --> 00:05:10,242
Pizzas on record players,
151
00:05:10,244 --> 00:05:13,378
Hot cheerleaders
jumping from the roof
into the pool.
152
00:05:13,380 --> 00:05:15,380
We don't have a pool.
153
00:05:15,715 --> 00:05:17,449
Don't we?
154
00:05:17,451 --> 00:05:18,617
Blow this up.
155
00:05:18,619 --> 00:05:20,185
(gasps) sweet!
156
00:05:20,187 --> 00:05:23,322
I'm gonna go
grab my inhaler
and get started.
157
00:05:23,324 --> 00:05:23,822
Okay!
158
00:05:23,824 --> 00:05:25,324
I got twister
and ashtrays.
159
00:05:25,326 --> 00:05:27,259
What time's
this party kicking off?
160
00:05:27,261 --> 00:05:28,293
Whoa, wait.
You're okay with this?
161
00:05:28,295 --> 00:05:31,563
Uh, look,
I... I don't condone
lying to your parents,
162
00:05:31,565 --> 00:05:34,966
But I've been tracking
your highs and lows
this year.
163
00:05:34,968 --> 00:05:36,968
And frankly,
you need this.
164
00:05:36,970 --> 00:05:37,803
Awesome!
165
00:05:37,805 --> 00:05:39,404
Only thing left
is to make sure
166
00:05:39,406 --> 00:05:42,207
Mom and dad leave
without suspecting a thing.
167
00:05:42,209 --> 00:05:43,075
Okay, love bugs.
168
00:05:43,077 --> 00:05:46,078
Pops is in charge
while we're away
for the evening.
169
00:05:46,080 --> 00:05:47,112
Have fun.
170
00:05:47,114 --> 00:05:47,779
No fun here.
171
00:05:47,781 --> 00:05:49,214
We're just gonna sit here
bored to death
172
00:05:49,216 --> 00:05:50,315
Waiting for you
to come home.
173
00:05:50,317 --> 00:05:53,985
Oh, well, in that case,
throw on some shoes
and join us! I insist.
174
00:05:53,987 --> 00:05:55,387
Then it's settled.
We're coming.
175
00:05:55,389 --> 00:05:57,322
What are you doing?
Panicking.
176
00:05:57,324 --> 00:06:00,692
Okay, if the kids
come with us,
I'm staying home.
177
00:06:00,694 --> 00:06:02,227
Great! Stay.
178
00:06:02,229 --> 00:06:03,228
What's wrong with you?
179
00:06:03,230 --> 00:06:04,363
The more the merrier.
180
00:06:04,365 --> 00:06:05,497
You're a stupid,
stupid boy.
181
00:06:05,499 --> 00:06:08,900
You... You two just go.
I'll hold down the fort.
182
00:06:08,902 --> 00:06:11,536
All right.
Dinner's in the fridge.
183
00:06:11,538 --> 00:06:14,206
(sighs)
that was a close one.
184
00:06:14,208 --> 00:06:16,708
We make a good team,
guys.
185
00:06:17,176 --> 00:06:18,377
Dover: (on mic)
ladies and gentlemen...
186
00:06:18,379 --> 00:06:20,545
Adult adam:
While barry couldn't wait
to start his epic night,
187
00:06:20,547 --> 00:06:21,780
My dad was still indifferent
about his.
188
00:06:21,782 --> 00:06:24,816
Dover: ...Captain of the 1961
state championship team
murray goldberg!
189
00:06:24,818 --> 00:06:25,951
(whistle blows)
190
00:06:25,953 --> 00:06:26,685
(all cheering)
191
00:06:26,687 --> 00:06:28,620
Adult adam:
...Until this happened.
192
00:06:28,622 --> 00:06:30,222
What the hell's
going on?
193
00:06:30,224 --> 00:06:31,590
What's wrong
with these people?
194
00:06:31,592 --> 00:06:34,192
Nothing.
They love you, murray.
195
00:06:34,194 --> 00:06:34,693
(chuckles)
196
00:06:34,695 --> 00:06:37,262
Adult adam:
For my dad,
the past was the past.
197
00:06:37,264 --> 00:06:37,996
He never wanted to be
198
00:06:37,998 --> 00:06:40,031
One of those guys
always recounting
his glory days.
199
00:06:40,033 --> 00:06:42,968
But for one shining moment,
he decided to embrace it.
200
00:06:42,970 --> 00:06:46,204
All: (chanting)
chomp, chomp, chomp!
Let's go, beavers! Let's go!
201
00:06:46,206 --> 00:06:47,973
Chomp, chomp, chomp!
(whistle blows)
202
00:06:47,975 --> 00:06:49,775
Adult adam:
My dad hadn't picked up
a basketball in years.
203
00:06:49,777 --> 00:06:51,576
But by the end
of the first half,
204
00:06:51,578 --> 00:06:53,211
He was ready to suit up.
205
00:06:53,213 --> 00:06:55,580
Oh! (laughs)
206
00:06:55,582 --> 00:06:57,249
That's how we do it,
beavers!
207
00:06:57,251 --> 00:06:58,784
Dover: Okay!
Yeah!
208
00:06:58,786 --> 00:06:59,918
Just want to take
a quick moment
209
00:06:59,920 --> 00:07:02,187
To welcome back
murray goldberg.
210
00:07:02,189 --> 00:07:04,689
In honor of his
25-year-old record,
211
00:07:04,691 --> 00:07:05,457
We'd like to present him
212
00:07:05,459 --> 00:07:07,826
With a ball
signed by the entire team.
213
00:07:07,828 --> 00:07:09,494
Murray, come on down.
214
00:07:09,496 --> 00:07:11,430
(all cheering)
215
00:07:11,432 --> 00:07:12,397
Whoo!
216
00:07:12,399 --> 00:07:14,833
Hey, hot stuff!
217
00:07:17,970 --> 00:07:18,870
Thank you.
218
00:07:18,872 --> 00:07:19,838
Thank you very much.
219
00:07:19,840 --> 00:07:22,908
All: (chanting)
shoot the ball!
Shoot the ball!
220
00:07:22,910 --> 00:07:25,744
Shoot the ball!
Shoot the ball!
221
00:07:25,746 --> 00:07:26,945
Shoot the ball!
Shoot the ball!
222
00:07:26,947 --> 00:07:28,447
Really?
What are you doing?
223
00:07:28,449 --> 00:07:31,116
Shoot the ball!
Shoot the ball!
(chuckles)
224
00:07:31,118 --> 00:07:33,051
Shoot the ball!
Shoot the ball!
225
00:07:33,053 --> 00:07:36,154
Shoot the ball!
Shoot the ball!
That's my husband!
226
00:07:36,156 --> 00:07:38,123
Adult adam:
The moment my dad
stepped to that line,
227
00:07:38,125 --> 00:07:42,727
He realized he was still
that kid from high school...
228
00:07:42,729 --> 00:07:46,832
An athlete, a legend,
a champion.
229
00:07:46,834 --> 00:07:48,867
And then, he did this.
230
00:07:59,111 --> 00:08:00,912
(camera shutter clicks)
got it!
231
00:08:00,914 --> 00:08:02,814
Boy: You suck, old man!
232
00:08:02,816 --> 00:08:03,815
(all laughing)
233
00:08:03,817 --> 00:08:05,817
All: (chanting) air ball!
234
00:08:05,819 --> 00:08:06,818
Adult adam:
In his defense,
235
00:08:06,820 --> 00:08:08,320
That was a very common
shooting style
236
00:08:08,322 --> 00:08:09,020
Back in the day.
237
00:08:09,022 --> 00:08:12,090
But as the chant
of "air ball"
rang through the gym,
238
00:08:12,092 --> 00:08:13,258
It only confirmed to my dad
239
00:08:13,260 --> 00:08:14,926
That he didn't belong
on that court.
240
00:08:14,928 --> 00:08:16,895
He belonged
in front of the tv
241
00:08:16,897 --> 00:08:17,829
In his underpants.
242
00:08:17,831 --> 00:08:21,099
But this wasn't
the most embarrassing display
of the evening.
243
00:08:21,101 --> 00:08:24,469
That belonged
to my brother's epic party.
244
00:08:24,471 --> 00:08:25,103
It was 9:00,
245
00:08:25,105 --> 00:08:27,639
And the only people
that showed up were me,
246
00:08:27,641 --> 00:08:30,675
Roger mcfadden,
who brought bugles,
247
00:08:30,677 --> 00:08:34,212
And gustav,
the foreign-exchange student.
248
00:08:34,214 --> 00:08:35,080
Later. I'm going out.
249
00:08:35,082 --> 00:08:36,915
Wait, wait,
wait, wait, wait.
250
00:08:36,917 --> 00:08:39,217
Look... Look what's
happening in there.
251
00:08:39,219 --> 00:08:41,219
It's a pure
sausage fest.
252
00:08:41,221 --> 00:08:43,121
The bugles are
for hot chicks only!
253
00:08:43,123 --> 00:08:47,125
You're a popular girl.
Invite some of
your friends over.
254
00:08:47,127 --> 00:08:49,127
The poor guy needs this.
255
00:08:49,129 --> 00:08:50,462
Barry: (shouts)
shut up, gustav!
256
00:08:50,464 --> 00:08:53,031
It's called
being fashionably late.
257
00:08:53,033 --> 00:08:56,401
Fine. I'll call
a couple of my friends.
258
00:08:56,403 --> 00:08:57,168
Thank you.
259
00:08:57,170 --> 00:08:58,069
(indistinct conversations)
260
00:08:58,071 --> 00:08:59,638
Adult adam:
Nowadays, all it would
take is a tweet.
261
00:08:59,640 --> 00:09:01,406
But back then,
one phone call
worked just as well.
262
00:09:01,408 --> 00:09:03,475
I thought you said
"a couple of friends."
263
00:09:03,477 --> 00:09:05,143
All I did
was call lainey.
264
00:09:05,145 --> 00:09:07,078
You wanted barry
to have fun, right?
265
00:09:07,080 --> 00:09:10,048
Look at the guy.
He is the man.
266
00:09:10,050 --> 00:09:12,684
Welcome to casa de barry,
ladies!
267
00:09:12,686 --> 00:09:16,888
Looking good.
Nice pants, random dude.
268
00:09:16,890 --> 00:09:17,622
Told you I'd rock.
269
00:09:17,624 --> 00:09:20,191
Is the party
like a rap video,
or what?
270
00:09:20,193 --> 00:09:21,326
Move over,
aunt rose's 50th,
271
00:09:21,328 --> 00:09:25,430
This is the hottest party
this dining room's
ever seen.
272
00:09:30,002 --> 00:09:32,304
Holy crap.
It's lexy bloom.
273
00:09:32,306 --> 00:09:33,405
She came!
274
00:09:33,407 --> 00:09:34,139
She's here!
275
00:09:34,141 --> 00:09:35,907
What are you waiting for,
man?
276
00:09:35,909 --> 00:09:37,609
Chiclet me.
277
00:09:39,612 --> 00:09:40,145
Whoa, girl.
278
00:09:40,147 --> 00:09:42,347
I see you found
the vip section.
279
00:09:42,349 --> 00:09:44,316
What makes this
the vip section?
280
00:09:44,318 --> 00:09:45,050
'cause I'm here.
281
00:09:45,052 --> 00:09:47,586
Anything you want,
I'll make it happen.
282
00:09:47,588 --> 00:09:50,822
Fruit roll-ups?
Bagel bites?
283
00:09:50,824 --> 00:09:51,957
Flintstone vitamins?
284
00:09:51,959 --> 00:09:54,192
The world's
your oyster, baby.
285
00:09:54,194 --> 00:09:54,626
See?
286
00:09:54,628 --> 00:09:56,261
We just gave
your weird little brother
287
00:09:56,263 --> 00:09:58,663
The best night
of his life.
288
00:09:58,665 --> 00:10:02,334
Whoo!
The party has arrived!
289
00:10:02,336 --> 00:10:04,869
You go to school
with him?
290
00:10:04,871 --> 00:10:06,504
I do not.
291
00:10:06,506 --> 00:10:07,639
And we're out of hand.
292
00:10:07,641 --> 00:10:10,308
Who wants
to take a shower?
293
00:10:12,511 --> 00:10:15,447
Adult adam:
By 10:00, barry's party
was blowing up...
294
00:10:15,449 --> 00:10:17,248
But not as much
as my sister.
295
00:10:17,250 --> 00:10:21,386
Hey! Stop!
You're spilling everywhere!
296
00:10:21,721 --> 00:10:22,153
You!
297
00:10:22,155 --> 00:10:24,289
Stop making out
in my dad's chair!
298
00:10:24,291 --> 00:10:26,891
He lives there!
299
00:10:26,893 --> 00:10:27,759
(sighs)
300
00:10:27,761 --> 00:10:29,694
What the hell?
That's my mom's!
301
00:10:29,696 --> 00:10:31,262
Why are
you wearing that?
302
00:10:31,264 --> 00:10:32,764
Oh, it's a sweater party.
303
00:10:32,766 --> 00:10:33,431
That's not a thing.
304
00:10:33,433 --> 00:10:35,900
And I put a sign
on the stairs
that said "off limits."
305
00:10:35,902 --> 00:10:38,370
Ah, yeah,
that piece of yarn broke,
306
00:10:38,372 --> 00:10:41,339
So we all just kind of...
Helped ourselves.
307
00:10:41,341 --> 00:10:43,375
"we?"
308
00:10:43,909 --> 00:10:46,745
(indistinct conversations)
309
00:10:49,915 --> 00:10:50,682
Off!
310
00:10:50,684 --> 00:10:52,083
Everyone take it off!
311
00:10:52,085 --> 00:10:54,853
Yes! It's happening!
Take it off!
312
00:10:54,855 --> 00:10:55,920
Adam, go upstairs!
313
00:10:55,922 --> 00:10:58,456
Well, the sign says
it's off limits.
314
00:10:58,458 --> 00:10:59,858
The yarn is broken.
315
00:10:59,860 --> 00:11:01,693
Upstairs.
316
00:11:02,561 --> 00:11:03,795
I said "upstairs"!
317
00:11:03,797 --> 00:11:07,265
Okay.
This is officially nuts.
318
00:11:07,267 --> 00:11:09,467
You need to put
an end to this.
319
00:11:09,469 --> 00:11:10,168
Me? You're the adult!
320
00:11:10,170 --> 00:11:14,172
I'm the cool grandpa.
I can't be the bummer.
321
00:11:14,174 --> 00:11:15,874
You be the bummer.
322
00:11:15,876 --> 00:11:16,708
Oh!
323
00:11:16,710 --> 00:11:18,009
Uh, there's a pizza
on the record player.
324
00:11:18,011 --> 00:11:21,446
(needle scratching)
it's bad for the needle.
325
00:11:22,882 --> 00:11:25,150
You people are disgusting!
326
00:11:26,352 --> 00:11:27,886
What the hell
are you doing?
327
00:11:27,888 --> 00:11:29,320
It's a sweater party.
328
00:11:29,322 --> 00:11:30,388
That's not a thing!
329
00:11:30,390 --> 00:11:33,491
Stop encouraging this.
You need to shut it down.
330
00:11:33,493 --> 00:11:34,659
Shut it down?
331
00:11:34,661 --> 00:11:36,995
No way!
This is my party.
332
00:11:36,997 --> 00:11:41,566
And I say we rage on
until the crack of dawn!
333
00:11:41,568 --> 00:11:42,600
All: Yeah!
334
00:11:42,602 --> 00:11:47,572
Well, I say we each
pick up one piece of trash
and leave!
335
00:11:47,574 --> 00:11:48,773
All: Boo!
336
00:11:48,775 --> 00:11:51,810
(cups clatter)
337
00:11:51,812 --> 00:11:52,877
Smile all you want.
That's it.
338
00:11:52,879 --> 00:11:56,181
I'm calling the hotel
where mom and dad
are staying.
339
00:11:56,183 --> 00:11:57,816
I see what this is.
340
00:11:57,818 --> 00:11:58,383
You're jealous
341
00:11:58,385 --> 00:12:01,486
'cause I've thrown
the greatest party
of all time.
342
00:12:01,488 --> 00:12:03,655
Look around.
It's not your party.
343
00:12:03,657 --> 00:12:05,790
These are all
my friends.
344
00:12:06,192 --> 00:12:07,592
Yo, ari.
345
00:12:08,094 --> 00:12:08,893
Whose party is this?
346
00:12:08,895 --> 00:12:12,697
Erica's throwing
a going-away party
for the swedish dude.
347
00:12:12,832 --> 00:12:15,400
It doesn't matter.
Lexy bloom's here.
348
00:12:15,402 --> 00:12:17,035
She came to see me.
349
00:12:17,037 --> 00:12:19,037
Oh, did she?
350
00:12:25,111 --> 00:12:26,511
Barry, wait.
351
00:12:26,513 --> 00:12:29,247
I didn't mean to...
(sighs)
352
00:12:32,585 --> 00:12:34,018
That did not go well.
353
00:12:34,020 --> 00:12:34,853
No, it did not.
354
00:12:34,855 --> 00:12:37,055
Why are you
so mad at me?
355
00:12:37,057 --> 00:12:38,189
I saw the look
on your face.
356
00:12:38,191 --> 00:12:40,725
You were thrilled
to be back out there
on that court.
357
00:12:40,727 --> 00:12:42,494
You know why I don't talk
about the past?
358
00:12:42,496 --> 00:12:43,595
I'm gonna tell you.
359
00:12:43,597 --> 00:12:45,330
Because it was great.
360
00:12:45,332 --> 00:12:48,066
I was class president.
I was a basketball star.
361
00:12:48,068 --> 00:12:49,033
I was a hero.
362
00:12:49,035 --> 00:12:53,104
And now I'm just
none of those things.
363
00:12:53,239 --> 00:12:55,507
Have you ever tried
shooting the ball this way?
364
00:12:55,509 --> 00:12:59,010
It was a very common
shooting style!
365
00:12:59,012 --> 00:13:02,614
Adult adam: Turns out,
my dad wasn't the only one
kicking himself.
366
00:13:02,616 --> 00:13:03,648
Barry's big chance
367
00:13:03,650 --> 00:13:05,216
To become a legend
and win over lexy bloom
368
00:13:05,218 --> 00:13:08,153
Had literally been
kissed goodbye.
369
00:13:08,155 --> 00:13:10,855
What's shaking, gustav?
(scoffs)
370
00:13:10,857 --> 00:13:12,157
I wish I was gustav.
371
00:13:12,159 --> 00:13:15,426
Except for that
weird fish lunch
he always brings.
372
00:13:15,428 --> 00:13:19,364
So, why you out here,
missing your own party?
373
00:13:19,366 --> 00:13:21,566
Well, it has
come to my attention
374
00:13:21,568 --> 00:13:22,433
That this
is erica's party,
375
00:13:22,435 --> 00:13:25,036
And I'm just a big, giant,
invisible bag of suck.
376
00:13:25,038 --> 00:13:27,071
Oh, come on.
You're not invisible.
377
00:13:27,073 --> 00:13:30,141
You're barry goldberg,
the guy who freaked out
on the lunch lady
378
00:13:30,143 --> 00:13:31,409
Because they ran out
of pudding.
379
00:13:31,411 --> 00:13:34,879
Why is that the only thing
anyone ever remembers
about me?
380
00:13:34,881 --> 00:13:37,816
Hey, they promised pudding.
They had no pudding.
381
00:13:38,350 --> 00:13:40,185
It was a dark day.
Mmm.
382
00:13:40,187 --> 00:13:42,520
Look, I know you feel like
this year was a bust,
383
00:13:42,522 --> 00:13:45,690
But you did
a ton of cool stuff.
384
00:13:45,692 --> 00:13:47,792
Karate in the talent show.
385
00:13:47,794 --> 00:13:49,427
You're on
the wrestling team.
386
00:13:49,429 --> 00:13:50,261
You did that rap video
387
00:13:50,263 --> 00:13:51,996
About stone cold
groovin' on a ferris wheel.
388
00:13:51,998 --> 00:13:54,966
You like my rap?
It's hilarious.
389
00:13:54,968 --> 00:13:57,969
Wait, that's what
you were going for, right?
390
00:13:58,737 --> 00:13:59,370
Yeah!
391
00:13:59,372 --> 00:14:01,773
How do you know
so much stuff about me?
392
00:14:01,775 --> 00:14:03,107
Your sister's
my best friend.
393
00:14:03,109 --> 00:14:04,642
I've known you
my whole life,
394
00:14:04,644 --> 00:14:06,911
And I can honestly say
there's...
395
00:14:06,913 --> 00:14:08,513
No one like you.
396
00:14:08,515 --> 00:14:08,980
Thanks.
397
00:14:08,982 --> 00:14:11,416
Adult adam:
Who knew my sister's wild,
bad-influence best friend
398
00:14:11,418 --> 00:14:14,118
Would be the one
to remind my brother
that he was special
399
00:14:14,120 --> 00:14:17,622
In his own bizarre,
barry kind of way?
400
00:14:17,624 --> 00:14:18,790
(chuckles)
now stop pouting
401
00:14:18,792 --> 00:14:22,760
And come show
erica's friends
whose party it really is.
402
00:14:22,995 --> 00:14:25,697
Adult adam:
For the first time in ages,
403
00:14:25,699 --> 00:14:28,266
Things were looking up
for my big bro.
404
00:14:28,268 --> 00:14:30,735
It didn't last long.
405
00:14:31,737 --> 00:14:33,538
Oh, god!
406
00:14:33,540 --> 00:14:35,373
Oh, balls!
407
00:14:36,609 --> 00:14:39,244
Uh...Everybody try
and clean up a little bit!
408
00:14:39,246 --> 00:14:42,247
I... I'm going to bed!
Everyone, run!
409
00:14:42,249 --> 00:14:44,515
(screams)
410
00:14:44,517 --> 00:14:47,118
Adult adam: As barry
watched my parents
get out of that car,
411
00:14:47,120 --> 00:14:51,422
He knew there was
only one thing to do...
Freak out.
412
00:14:51,424 --> 00:14:53,558
Mom! Dad!
413
00:14:53,560 --> 00:14:54,392
Why are you home?
414
00:14:54,394 --> 00:14:55,326
You're supposed to be
at the hotel!
415
00:14:55,328 --> 00:14:57,962
There was a banquet!
Who skips a banquet?
416
00:14:57,964 --> 00:14:58,563
A party?
417
00:14:58,565 --> 00:15:00,331
I don't even like
my own kids,
418
00:15:00,333 --> 00:15:02,000
Let alone a house
full of other people's!
419
00:15:02,002 --> 00:15:05,770
Murray! Oh, my god.
They're wearing
my sweaters!
420
00:15:05,772 --> 00:15:07,572
No! Those aren't yours!
421
00:15:07,574 --> 00:15:10,241
It's a look that's happening!
Watch mtv!
422
00:15:10,243 --> 00:15:11,976
Yeah, I'm sure
all the young boys
423
00:15:11,978 --> 00:15:14,245
Are wearing
leopard sweaters.
424
00:15:14,247 --> 00:15:15,146
Hey!
425
00:15:15,148 --> 00:15:16,514
That's my leopard!
426
00:15:16,516 --> 00:15:17,215
Okay, fine.
427
00:15:17,217 --> 00:15:19,183
Clearly, you're gonna
kill me, and...
428
00:15:19,185 --> 00:15:20,251
Yes! Yes, I am!
429
00:15:20,253 --> 00:15:21,953
Do it, murray.
Do it with your hands.
430
00:15:21,955 --> 00:15:24,188
Just hear me out, please.
431
00:15:24,890 --> 00:15:26,257
I'm nothing like you, dad.
432
00:15:26,259 --> 00:15:28,860
I don't dominate
in high school.
433
00:15:28,862 --> 00:15:30,461
I don't hold
sports records.
434
00:15:30,463 --> 00:15:33,498
People only know me
'cause I get angry
at pudding.
435
00:15:33,500 --> 00:15:36,334
Listen, you've had
your glory days,
436
00:15:36,336 --> 00:15:38,403
And they sounded awesome.
437
00:15:38,405 --> 00:15:40,738
But this, in there,
438
00:15:40,740 --> 00:15:43,308
This is the best
I'm ever gonna do.
439
00:15:43,742 --> 00:15:46,945
Oh, boopie.
That's so sad.
440
00:15:46,947 --> 00:15:49,113
But you are
in so much trouble.
441
00:15:49,115 --> 00:15:49,714
But...Aww.
442
00:15:49,716 --> 00:15:51,950
I'm begging you.
This is my moment.
443
00:15:51,952 --> 00:15:55,987
All I'm asking for
is seven more hours
of nonstop partying.
444
00:15:55,989 --> 00:15:57,922
Absolutely not.
445
00:15:57,924 --> 00:15:59,090
You got 10 minutes.
446
00:15:59,092 --> 00:16:01,993
Seriously?
Yeah, but do me a favor.
447
00:16:01,995 --> 00:16:04,896
Make this a night
you'll always remember.
448
00:16:04,898 --> 00:16:07,699
You are the greatest father
on this planet.
449
00:16:07,866 --> 00:16:10,101
Adult adam:
As my brother
desperately sprinted off
450
00:16:10,103 --> 00:16:11,669
For his 10 minutes
of glory,
451
00:16:11,671 --> 00:16:13,838
My dad realized
he could still be a hero
452
00:16:13,840 --> 00:16:15,873
To someone
who actually mattered.
453
00:16:15,875 --> 00:16:18,409
Awful parenting choice.
454
00:16:18,411 --> 00:16:19,510
Just awful.
455
00:16:19,512 --> 00:16:23,214
You've seen him run.
He needs this.
456
00:16:23,216 --> 00:16:24,549
(bon jovi's
livin' on a prayer playing)
457
00:16:24,551 --> 00:16:29,020
♪ tommy used to work
on the docks
458
00:16:29,022 --> 00:16:30,321
♪ union's been on strike
459
00:16:30,323 --> 00:16:32,690
♪ he's down on his luck
460
00:16:32,692 --> 00:16:35,526
♪ it's tough
461
00:16:36,261 --> 00:16:38,896
♪ so tough
462
00:16:40,332 --> 00:16:42,467
♪ gina works the diner
all day ♪
463
00:16:42,469 --> 00:16:43,568
Adult adam: This was it...
464
00:16:43,570 --> 00:16:44,736
Barry's year
was coming to a close,
465
00:16:44,738 --> 00:16:47,305
And it all came down
to 10 magical minutes.
466
00:16:47,307 --> 00:16:48,039
♪ working for her man
467
00:16:48,041 --> 00:16:50,241
♪ she brings home her pay
for love
468
00:16:50,243 --> 00:16:50,942
♪ mmm, for love ♪
469
00:16:50,944 --> 00:16:53,311
Adult adam:
He knew there was only
one way to leave his mark.
470
00:16:53,313 --> 00:16:54,779
That was on
the dance floor.
471
00:16:54,781 --> 00:16:56,214
♪ she says
we've got to hold on... ♪
472
00:16:56,216 --> 00:16:58,349
Adult adam:
He may have been a far cry
from michael jackson.
473
00:16:58,351 --> 00:17:00,284
But in that moment,
he sure felt like him.
474
00:17:00,286 --> 00:17:01,586
♪ 'cause it doesn't
make a difference... ♪
475
00:17:01,588 --> 00:17:02,920
It wasn't just
barry's enthusiasm
476
00:17:02,922 --> 00:17:04,622
That brought the crowd
together.
477
00:17:04,624 --> 00:17:07,191
It was his giant '80s
boom box
478
00:17:07,193 --> 00:17:09,761
Blasting out
the anthem of our youth.
479
00:17:09,763 --> 00:17:11,629
And it sounded like this.
480
00:17:11,631 --> 00:17:12,563
♪ we'll give it a shot
481
00:17:12,565 --> 00:17:16,167
All:
♪ oh, we're halfway there
482
00:17:16,169 --> 00:17:20,304
♪ whoa, livin' on a prayer
483
00:17:20,306 --> 00:17:22,240
♪ take my hand
484
00:17:22,242 --> 00:17:23,808
♪ we'll make it, I swear
485
00:17:23,810 --> 00:17:28,279
♪ whoa, livin' on a prayer ♪
486
00:17:28,281 --> 00:17:28,880
Who is that guy?
487
00:17:28,882 --> 00:17:31,783
That's barry goldberg.
This is his party.
(all cheering)
488
00:17:31,785 --> 00:17:35,186
♪ tommy's got his six string
in hock
489
00:17:35,188 --> 00:17:36,120
♪ now he's holding in ♪
490
00:17:36,122 --> 00:17:37,688
Dude, lexy bloom's
looking over here.
491
00:17:37,690 --> 00:17:39,424
♪ what used to make him
talk so tough ♪
492
00:17:39,426 --> 00:17:40,058
What do I do?
493
00:17:40,060 --> 00:17:42,360
I'm gonna help you out.
You ready to
make her jealous?
494
00:17:42,362 --> 00:17:43,494
Make her what?
495
00:17:43,496 --> 00:17:45,696
♪ it's tough
496
00:17:47,399 --> 00:17:49,734
♪ gina dreams
of running away
497
00:17:49,736 --> 00:17:50,802
♪ when she cries
in the night ♪
498
00:17:50,804 --> 00:17:53,271
What are you doing?
Ow! I don't know!
499
00:17:53,273 --> 00:17:54,338
What are you doing?
500
00:17:54,340 --> 00:17:57,375
♪ tommy whispers,
"baby, it's okay
501
00:17:58,610 --> 00:18:01,312
♪ "someday"
502
00:18:01,747 --> 00:18:04,949
♪ we've got to hold on
to what we've got ♪
503
00:18:04,951 --> 00:18:10,388
This is the greatest night
of my life!
504
00:18:10,823 --> 00:18:12,390
Yeah!
505
00:18:12,624 --> 00:18:13,357
Time's up!
506
00:18:13,359 --> 00:18:14,525
Get the hell
out of my house!
507
00:18:14,527 --> 00:18:16,227
And leave
my (bleep) sweaters!
508
00:18:16,229 --> 00:18:19,564
Adult adam: Naturally,
my brother was grounded
for the entire summer.
509
00:18:19,566 --> 00:18:22,266
And you get to take
all my sweaters
to the dry cleaners.
510
00:18:22,268 --> 00:18:25,903
Adult adam: But sometimes,
those magic moments
are worth it.
511
00:18:25,905 --> 00:18:28,139
I'm very upset.
You have a lot of nerve,
young man.
512
00:18:28,141 --> 00:18:31,909
Adult adam:
It was a night
he'd carry with him forever,
513
00:18:31,911 --> 00:18:33,945
A night
no one could take away.
514
00:18:33,947 --> 00:18:39,217
For one brief moment,
barry goldberg was a legend.
515
00:18:39,219 --> 00:18:40,885
(guitar solo)
516
00:18:49,661 --> 00:18:54,265
You... You want
to hear about, uh,
how I met lou reed?
517
00:18:54,666 --> 00:18:56,734
Uh, yeah.
518
00:18:56,736 --> 00:18:57,401
Okay. It was 1965...
519
00:18:57,403 --> 00:19:00,371
Adult adam: Sure,
my dad would always be
the kind of guy
520
00:19:00,373 --> 00:19:03,274
Who loved his tv
and his la-z-boy,
521
00:19:03,276 --> 00:19:04,342
But after that fateful night,
522
00:19:04,344 --> 00:19:07,311
He found it easier
to open up a bit more.
523
00:19:07,313 --> 00:19:09,113
Swish, baby!
524
00:19:09,281 --> 00:19:10,948
Ah.
525
00:19:10,950 --> 00:19:12,783
Okay, by my count,
526
00:19:12,785 --> 00:19:15,219
You've missed
the last 22 shots.
527
00:19:15,221 --> 00:19:18,189
Just do it my way once.
528
00:19:18,191 --> 00:19:19,790
(sighs) fine.
529
00:19:19,792 --> 00:19:21,993
♪ oh, we're halfway there
530
00:19:21,995 --> 00:19:24,162
♪ whoa, livin' on a prayer ♪
531
00:19:24,164 --> 00:19:24,996
Swish, baby!
532
00:19:24,998 --> 00:19:25,930
New shooting style!
533
00:19:25,932 --> 00:19:27,231
Adult adam:
And, even crazier,
534
00:19:27,233 --> 00:19:29,767
Barry got my dad,
the free-throw king
535
00:19:29,769 --> 00:19:32,803
Back on the court
for some actual pointers.
536
00:19:32,805 --> 00:19:33,671
Intangibles!
537
00:19:33,673 --> 00:19:35,740
Adult adam:
It didn't help much.
538
00:19:35,742 --> 00:19:37,074
Beverly: Oh, honey.
539
00:19:37,076 --> 00:19:39,410
You're delicious
no matter how bad you are.
540
00:19:39,412 --> 00:19:41,245
Oh, damn it, barry!
541
00:19:41,247 --> 00:19:42,547
Adult adam:
When it comes
to my childhood,
542
00:19:42,549 --> 00:19:46,350
I may not always
remember exactly
when something happened,
543
00:19:46,352 --> 00:19:47,318
Or exactly who was there
544
00:19:47,320 --> 00:19:51,656
But I do know
that it was 1980-something
545
00:19:51,658 --> 00:19:53,824
And it was awesome.
546
00:19:53,826 --> 00:19:55,626
Doo! Doo, doo, doo!
547
00:19:55,628 --> 00:19:57,695
Stop videotaping!
548
00:19:57,697 --> 00:19:59,163
Get out! Mom!
549
00:19:59,165 --> 00:20:01,365
Stop! I swear...
550
00:20:01,367 --> 00:20:03,334
(breathing rapidly)
551
00:20:03,336 --> 00:20:04,635
Death blow.
552
00:20:04,637 --> 00:20:05,937
Death blow.
553
00:20:05,939 --> 00:20:06,938
(grunting)
554
00:20:06,940 --> 00:20:08,739
You're aggravating me,
you little bastard!
555
00:20:08,741 --> 00:20:11,275
He's aggravating me,
the little bastard!
556
00:20:11,277 --> 00:20:12,610
Why are you
hitting yourself, huh?
557
00:20:12,612 --> 00:20:14,946
What did your face
ever do to you?
Ow.
558
00:20:14,948 --> 00:20:16,113
(grunts)
ow.
559
00:20:16,115 --> 00:20:17,281
Open up.
No!
560
00:20:17,283 --> 00:20:19,584
No! No! No! No!
561
00:20:19,586 --> 00:20:24,088
(speaking indistinctly)
no. No. No. No.
562
00:20:24,156 --> 00:20:25,423
(laughs)
563
00:20:25,425 --> 00:20:26,123
Pops: My god.
564
00:20:26,125 --> 00:20:27,358
This house
is going nuts.
565
00:20:27,360 --> 00:20:29,393
This house is
going nuts.
566
00:20:29,395 --> 00:20:30,094
I am optimus prime,
567
00:20:30,096 --> 00:20:31,729
And I am a good guy,
and I will kick your butt!
568
00:20:31,731 --> 00:20:33,631
(knocking on door)
who's there?
569
00:20:33,633 --> 00:20:34,999
Murray: Get dressed now!
570
00:20:35,001 --> 00:20:36,767
Man: Get dressed now.
571
00:20:36,769 --> 00:20:38,135
And this is it.
572
00:20:38,137 --> 00:20:41,172
Ahhh! That hurt!
Ahhh!
573
00:20:43,575 --> 00:20:45,643
Whoa, what a night.
574
00:20:45,645 --> 00:20:46,811
What's up?
You got any oj?
575
00:20:46,813 --> 00:20:48,412
I'm sorry, what the hell
are you doing here?
576
00:20:48,414 --> 00:20:51,015
Ah, I passed out
in the basement
during the party.
577
00:20:51,017 --> 00:20:52,216
Take off my sweater
and get out.
578
00:20:52,218 --> 00:20:55,353
What's in it for me?
Nothing. It's my sweater.
579
00:20:55,355 --> 00:20:57,321
Fine. (sighs)
580
00:20:57,323 --> 00:20:58,256
Show me your boobs.
No.
581
00:20:58,258 --> 00:20:59,624
Then give me
a million dollars.
No.
582
00:20:59,626 --> 00:21:01,692
I'd very much
like to revisit
the boob conversation.
583
00:21:01,694 --> 00:21:03,628
I feel like we've done
this once before.
584
00:21:03,630 --> 00:21:05,896
Did it end in boobs?
No.
585
00:21:05,898 --> 00:21:06,530
Tell me something.
586
00:21:06,532 --> 00:21:09,567
When was the last time
you had a balanced breakfast?
587
00:21:09,569 --> 00:21:10,001
Every day.
588
00:21:10,003 --> 00:21:12,136
Protein from beef jerky,
energy from frosting.
589
00:21:12,138 --> 00:21:14,505
Sweetie, sit down.
I'm gonna make you
some food.
590
00:21:14,507 --> 00:21:15,306
You're gonna eat it.
591
00:21:15,308 --> 00:21:19,176
Then you're gonna
take off my sweater
and get the hell out.
592
00:21:20,212 --> 00:21:22,413
Morning, barry.
(sighs)