1
00:00:00,067 --> 00:00:02,167
ADULT ADAM: Back in the '80s
game shows ruled the TV.
2
00:00:02,169 --> 00:00:04,236
There was Pyramid,
Wheel of Fortune,
3
00:00:04,238 --> 00:00:05,704
Jeopardy!, and
The Newlywed Game.
4
00:00:05,706 --> 00:00:08,774
But to us kids, none came
close to Double Dare.
5
00:00:08,776 --> 00:00:10,309
It was the world's
best game show,
6
00:00:10,311 --> 00:00:13,045
filled with trivia,
physical challenges,
7
00:00:13,047 --> 00:00:13,979
and host Marc Summers,
8
00:00:13,981 --> 00:00:18,484
who managed to smile even
when his nice suits got messy.
9
00:00:18,486 --> 00:00:18,951
Idiots!
10
00:00:18,953 --> 00:00:20,986
The flag is under
the giant pad of butter!
11
00:00:20,988 --> 00:00:22,554
Always look
under the butter.
12
00:00:22,556 --> 00:00:23,622
If we ever get
on this show,
13
00:00:23,624 --> 00:00:24,757
imagine all the prizes
we'd win.
14
00:00:24,759 --> 00:00:27,226
We'd be strutting
around in our brand-new
British Knights,
15
00:00:27,228 --> 00:00:29,661
jammin' out to our
Panasonic portable
sound system,
16
00:00:29,663 --> 00:00:32,898
as we chow down
on a year's supply
of Chef Boyardee.
17
00:00:32,900 --> 00:00:35,601
It's all our dreams
wrapped into one.
(LAUGHS)
18
00:00:35,603 --> 00:00:38,337
But the coolest part,
It was filmed in Philly,
19
00:00:38,339 --> 00:00:39,571
which meant one thing.
20
00:00:39,573 --> 00:00:41,640
All right.
Shut your giggle holes.
21
00:00:41,642 --> 00:00:42,474
I have two announcements.
22
00:00:42,476 --> 00:00:47,312
First, whoever wrote
my phone number
in the boys' bathroom
23
00:00:47,314 --> 00:00:47,880
will be found.
24
00:00:47,882 --> 00:00:50,716
I called and asked
if his refrigerator
was running.
25
00:00:50,718 --> 00:00:53,218
It wasn't,
so it ended up
being sad.
26
00:00:53,220 --> 00:00:56,021
Second, some game show
called Double Dare
27
00:00:56,023 --> 00:00:57,456
is holding auditions
at our school,
28
00:00:57,458 --> 00:01:00,959
and two of you
will be picked to be
on their show.
29
00:01:00,961 --> 00:01:03,762
Now let's get those
bodies TV-ready.
30
00:01:04,498 --> 00:01:06,999
Dude, this is seriously
the best day of my life,
31
00:01:07,001 --> 00:01:09,435
and I once got mistaken
for Mary Lou Retton.
32
00:01:09,437 --> 00:01:09,968
Dorothy Hamill.
33
00:01:09,970 --> 00:01:11,470
We're actually gonna
be on Double Dare.
34
00:01:11,472 --> 00:01:14,773
You two so have
this in the bag.
35
00:01:14,775 --> 00:01:16,308
(LAUGHS)
36
00:01:16,310 --> 00:01:17,242
Bro, you don't
have a prayer.
37
00:01:17,244 --> 00:01:20,312
Shut up, Dave Kim.
This face was made for TV.
38
00:01:20,314 --> 00:01:22,147
But that voice...
Youch.
39
00:01:22,149 --> 00:01:25,551
You two can't compete
with Handsome Ben.
40
00:01:25,553 --> 00:01:26,652
ADULT ADAM: He was right.
41
00:01:26,654 --> 00:01:27,553
We all had one growing up...
42
00:01:27,555 --> 00:01:28,987
The vicious rival
who always won.
43
00:01:28,989 --> 00:01:31,290
Who always beats you out
for class president?
Handsome Ben.
44
00:01:31,292 --> 00:01:33,959
And who always gets
the lead in the musical?
Handsome Ben.
45
00:01:33,961 --> 00:01:38,297
Who was first in line
to see Temple of Doom?
Handsome Ben.
46
00:01:38,299 --> 00:01:40,999
You had to sit
in the second row,
47
00:01:41,001 --> 00:01:41,633
like a chump.
48
00:01:41,635 --> 00:01:44,536
Fine! You're right!
He wins every time.
49
00:01:44,538 --> 00:01:46,438
But this
will be different.
50
00:01:46,440 --> 00:01:47,439
Will it?
51
00:01:47,441 --> 00:01:48,373
Look at him.
52
00:01:48,375 --> 00:01:50,008
Hey, AG.
Hey, Dave Kim.
53
00:01:50,010 --> 00:01:53,445
Hi, Ben. (GIGGLES)
Hey, buddy.
54
00:01:53,514 --> 00:01:54,513
You're right.
He's amazing.
55
00:01:54,515 --> 00:01:56,448
My only real shot
is to win over the producers
56
00:01:56,450 --> 00:01:59,351
by picking a partner
that'll make me stand out.
57
00:01:59,353 --> 00:02:01,019
Perhaps someone like...
58
00:02:01,021 --> 00:02:02,154
"Cute Dave Kim."
59
00:02:02,156 --> 00:02:03,388
No one calls you that.
60
00:02:03,390 --> 00:02:04,823
I was thinking Pops.
61
00:02:04,825 --> 00:02:05,524
Your grandfather?
62
00:02:05,526 --> 00:02:09,461
Nothing wins people over more
than an adorable old man.
63
00:02:09,463 --> 00:02:11,130
Handsome Ben
is going down.
64
00:02:11,132 --> 00:02:13,398
Kid won't know
what hit him.
65
00:02:15,336 --> 00:02:16,468
¶ I'm twisted up inside
66
00:02:16,470 --> 00:02:20,939
¶ But nonetheless,
I feel the need to say
67
00:02:22,643 --> 00:02:23,642
¶ I don't know the future
68
00:02:23,644 --> 00:02:27,546
¶ But the past keeps getting
clearer every day ¶
69
00:02:27,548 --> 00:02:29,381
ADULT ADAM:
It was fall 1980-something,
70
00:02:29,383 --> 00:02:31,283
and Barry and my dad
were sitting down
71
00:02:31,285 --> 00:02:32,618
to what they did
every Sunday...
72
00:02:32,620 --> 00:02:34,786
Watch the Eagles...
Go, baby, go,
baby, go!
73
00:02:34,788 --> 00:02:37,222
...for better or worse.
Fumble? No!
74
00:02:37,224 --> 00:02:37,990
That's it.
Season's over.
75
00:02:37,992 --> 00:02:40,592
It's the first game
of the year.
They already blew it.
76
00:02:40,594 --> 00:02:41,360
We got to fire the coach
77
00:02:41,362 --> 00:02:42,528
and start thinking
about next year.
78
00:02:42,530 --> 00:02:45,597
ADULT ADAM:
Whenever they'd watch,
my dad would turn on the team,
79
00:02:45,599 --> 00:02:47,065
while my brother
was hopelessly positive.
80
00:02:47,067 --> 00:02:49,067
Look, all we need
is a turnover,
a touchdown,
81
00:02:49,069 --> 00:02:52,938
a 2-point conversion,
an onside kick,
and two more touchdowns.
82
00:02:52,940 --> 00:02:54,373
Or 12 safeties.
83
00:02:54,375 --> 00:02:55,674
Turn it off!
I can't take it anymore.
84
00:02:55,676 --> 00:02:59,645
And they each handled
an Eagles loss
in their own special way.
85
00:02:59,647 --> 00:03:01,146
Hey, buddy.
Got you a new
burger flipper.
86
00:03:01,148 --> 00:03:04,917
I noticed your
old spatula was
a little worse for wear.
87
00:03:04,919 --> 00:03:07,853
Look at you.
Always so damn nice, huh?
88
00:03:07,855 --> 00:03:08,754
Well, I'm sick of it.
89
00:03:08,756 --> 00:03:10,656
Lashing out because
the Eagles lost?
90
00:03:10,658 --> 00:03:11,590
And I'm sick
of your face.
91
00:03:11,592 --> 00:03:13,158
I'll just leave this
and go.
92
00:03:13,160 --> 00:03:15,928
I will kill you
with this spatula,
93
00:03:15,930 --> 00:03:17,763
you thoughtful,
thoughtful man!
94
00:03:17,765 --> 00:03:19,998
As for my brother,
an Eagles loss meant
95
00:03:20,000 --> 00:03:22,768
several heartbroken days
of utter depression.
96
00:03:22,770 --> 00:03:23,835
Hey. Hugh Hefner.
97
00:03:23,837 --> 00:03:25,070
Cover your
downstairs stuff.
98
00:03:25,072 --> 00:03:26,872
You're in school,
not the grotto.
99
00:03:26,874 --> 00:03:28,307
The Eagles lost.
100
00:03:28,309 --> 00:03:29,208
Ohhh.
101
00:03:29,210 --> 00:03:30,309
Take the day.
102
00:03:30,311 --> 00:03:33,212
Make room, everybody!
Eagles fan coming through!
103
00:03:33,214 --> 00:03:35,080
Thankfully, a new week
meant a new chance
104
00:03:35,082 --> 00:03:37,549
for my dad and bro
to help the Eagles win...
105
00:03:37,551 --> 00:03:40,252
Through a series
of crazy superstitions.
106
00:03:40,254 --> 00:03:41,019
Let's get this going.
107
00:03:41,021 --> 00:03:42,554
I got on my good-luck
jersey and underpants.
108
00:03:42,556 --> 00:03:45,090
Now time for some
pregame cabbage
patching
109
00:03:45,092 --> 00:03:46,758
to supercharge
our good luck.
110
00:03:46,760 --> 00:03:47,659
Even if the superstitions
111
00:03:47,661 --> 00:03:49,461
breached the boundary
of common sense.
112
00:03:49,463 --> 00:03:51,430
Do it better!
The Eagles need us!
113
00:03:51,432 --> 00:03:52,764
Or any sense at all.
114
00:03:52,766 --> 00:03:54,499
Who wants some
double-cheesy nachos?
115
00:03:54,501 --> 00:03:56,735
Stop where you're at!
Mom, you know the rules!
116
00:03:56,737 --> 00:03:59,104
Once you step foot on the den
floor, the Eagles will lose.
117
00:03:59,106 --> 00:04:03,075
What happens in this house
has no impact on the game.
118
00:04:03,077 --> 00:04:04,409
That is adorable.
119
00:04:04,411 --> 00:04:05,210
I am not bad luck.
120
00:04:05,212 --> 00:04:07,012
Would you just stop
with this already?
121
00:04:07,014 --> 00:04:09,648
What happened the first
Sunday after we got married,
122
00:04:09,650 --> 00:04:12,017
when you insisted on
watching the game with me?
123
00:04:12,019 --> 00:04:14,720
They lost
by six stupid touchdowns.
124
00:04:14,722 --> 00:04:16,355
Just come and get
your nachos.
125
00:04:16,357 --> 00:04:17,089
Mom, you know the rules.
126
00:04:17,091 --> 00:04:19,858
Once the game starts,
we can't move
from our spot.
127
00:04:19,860 --> 00:04:20,726
Now truck it over
on the animal.
128
00:04:20,728 --> 00:04:23,762
ADULT ADAM:
This '80s toy monster truck
was their typical lifeline,
129
00:04:23,764 --> 00:04:27,199
mostly due to its retractable
claws for stability.
130
00:04:27,201 --> 00:04:28,166
(BOTH SIGH)
131
00:04:28,168 --> 00:04:29,935
The claws did nothing!
132
00:04:29,937 --> 00:04:30,836
Stay back!
Don't clean it up!
133
00:04:30,838 --> 00:04:33,238
There's hot cheese
on my rug!
134
00:04:33,240 --> 00:04:34,506
That's its home now!
135
00:04:34,508 --> 00:04:35,907
She jinxed us!
136
00:04:35,909 --> 00:04:37,743
Do your idiot dance!
137
00:04:40,314 --> 00:04:42,881
Pops,
I have amazing news!
138
00:04:42,883 --> 00:04:44,850
You're gonna be my partner
on Double Dare!
139
00:04:44,852 --> 00:04:47,252
That's the best news
I've heard all day.
140
00:04:47,254 --> 00:04:49,087
Also,
what's Double Dare?
141
00:04:49,089 --> 00:04:51,423
Only the country's
hottest game show.
142
00:04:51,425 --> 00:04:53,425
You love game shows,
right?
143
00:04:53,427 --> 00:04:53,892
You bet.
144
00:04:53,894 --> 00:04:56,895
That Vanna White
sure can turn a letter.
145
00:04:56,897 --> 00:04:57,396
Ha ha!
146
00:04:57,398 --> 00:04:59,831
Don't say any of that
at our audition.
147
00:04:59,833 --> 00:05:02,034
In fact, leave all
the talking to me.
148
00:05:02,036 --> 00:05:03,435
You sure
you don't want to do this
149
00:05:03,437 --> 00:05:04,936
with one of
your little friends?
150
00:05:04,938 --> 00:05:07,105
Nah. She'll understand.
151
00:05:07,107 --> 00:05:08,440
Ow! You punched me
in the heart!
152
00:05:08,442 --> 00:05:11,343
You're picking
your grandfather
over me? Seriously?
153
00:05:11,345 --> 00:05:13,812
You know it's been my dream
to go on Double Dare.
154
00:05:13,814 --> 00:05:16,548
It's selfish of you
not to support that.
155
00:05:16,550 --> 00:05:17,816
How am I
the weak link?
156
00:05:17,818 --> 00:05:19,217
You got flat feet
and a lazy eye.
157
00:05:19,219 --> 00:05:22,888
That Double Dare
human-hamster wheel
will eat you alive.
158
00:05:22,890 --> 00:05:23,889
I had no choice.
159
00:05:23,891 --> 00:05:24,690
This is the only way
160
00:05:24,692 --> 00:05:26,858
I can beat
my lifelong rival,
Handsome Ben.
161
00:05:26,860 --> 00:05:30,228
Dude, you're not his rival.
It's totally one-sided.
162
00:05:30,230 --> 00:05:32,097
Oh, yeah? Watch this.
163
00:05:32,099 --> 00:05:33,465
Hey, Ben.
164
00:05:33,467 --> 00:05:33,932
'Sup, Adam?
165
00:05:33,934 --> 00:05:35,834
Good luck at the
Double Dare tryouts.
166
00:05:35,836 --> 00:05:37,035
I hope you get it.
167
00:05:37,037 --> 00:05:38,537
(CHUCKLES)
168
00:05:38,539 --> 00:05:40,972
Stupid, generous
Handsome Ben.
169
00:05:40,974 --> 00:05:42,007
Well, I don't need you.
170
00:05:42,009 --> 00:05:43,642
I'm gonna make it
on the show and win,
171
00:05:43,644 --> 00:05:46,745
and I won't save
any slime for you!
172
00:05:46,747 --> 00:05:49,014
Is that a new
trapper keeper, Adam?
173
00:05:49,016 --> 00:05:51,717
Sweet.
Just got it. Thanks.
174
00:05:51,719 --> 00:05:52,684
(BOTH CHUCKLE)
175
00:05:52,686 --> 00:05:53,585
I will bury you.
176
00:05:53,587 --> 00:05:57,022
ADULT ADAM:
While I was plotting to beat
my lifelong rival,
177
00:05:57,024 --> 00:06:00,025
my mom had plotted a way
into the den.
178
00:06:00,027 --> 00:06:01,193
What... What is this?
What are you doing?
179
00:06:01,195 --> 00:06:02,894
Don't worry.
I'm not touching
the floor.
180
00:06:02,896 --> 00:06:06,031
I'm just gonna bust some
dust and be on my way.
181
00:06:06,033 --> 00:06:07,833
(VACUUM CLEANER RUNNING)
182
00:06:07,835 --> 00:06:08,266
Poop!
183
00:06:08,268 --> 00:06:09,568
Bevy, please! Come on!
Dear lord, no!
184
00:06:09,570 --> 00:06:12,237
And then
something crazy happened.
185
00:06:12,239 --> 00:06:12,904
Oh!
(SCREAMING)
186
00:06:12,906 --> 00:06:15,907
The Eagles intercepted
the moment
my mom stepped on the floor.
187
00:06:15,909 --> 00:06:17,109
And as soon as she left...
188
00:06:17,111 --> 00:06:19,177
Come on!
Are you kidding?
189
00:06:19,179 --> 00:06:20,479
...the Eagles fumbled.
190
00:06:20,481 --> 00:06:22,914
Dude.
Did you see that?
191
00:06:22,916 --> 00:06:25,217
When mom was in here,
the Eagles kicked butt.
192
00:06:25,219 --> 00:06:27,386
The second she left,
the Eagles sucked butt.
193
00:06:27,388 --> 00:06:28,053
What are you saying?
194
00:06:28,055 --> 00:06:29,755
Do you think
mom's good luck?
195
00:06:29,757 --> 00:06:32,290
No. It's just
a dumb coincidence.
196
00:06:32,292 --> 00:06:34,326
Only one way
to find out.
197
00:06:34,328 --> 00:06:36,428
Kee-ya!
What the hell!
198
00:06:36,430 --> 00:06:37,229
Shut up. Shut up.
199
00:06:37,231 --> 00:06:39,631
Mom! I think
dad spilled something!
200
00:06:39,633 --> 00:06:41,199
Hey, hey!
201
00:06:41,869 --> 00:06:43,301
It's okay.
I've always got a rag.
202
00:06:43,303 --> 00:06:44,669
It's a mom secret.
(CHUCKLES)
203
00:06:44,671 --> 00:06:46,972
(CROWD CHEERING)
They sacked Bradshaw.
204
00:06:46,974 --> 00:06:48,507
Get it! Get it! get it!
205
00:06:48,509 --> 00:06:49,374
...and they did.
206
00:06:49,376 --> 00:06:50,342
Good god, mom did it!
207
00:06:50,344 --> 00:06:52,544
No! That was
just another coincidence.
208
00:06:52,546 --> 00:06:54,913
You keep your mother
out of this. Understand?
209
00:06:54,915 --> 00:06:56,548
Understand what?
I heard "mother."
210
00:06:56,550 --> 00:06:57,315
I'm the mother.
Here I am.
211
00:06:57,317 --> 00:07:00,152
Dude, all these years,
we've got it wrong.
212
00:07:00,154 --> 00:07:01,953
You're not a jinx.
213
00:07:01,955 --> 00:07:05,223
You're like a real,
actual lucky charm.
214
00:07:05,225 --> 00:07:06,324
Thank you, schmoo.
215
00:07:06,326 --> 00:07:07,225
No. Stop.
216
00:07:07,227 --> 00:07:08,794
There's no such thing
as actual luck.
217
00:07:08,796 --> 00:07:11,029
Then why are you wearing your
lucky jersey and underpants?
218
00:07:11,031 --> 00:07:13,198
This helps the Eagles win,
not your mother.
219
00:07:13,200 --> 00:07:17,202
Looks like those greeny guys
are celebrating something.
220
00:07:17,204 --> 00:07:18,236
They scored!
221
00:07:18,238 --> 00:07:19,938
Mom stays...
Stays forever.
222
00:07:19,940 --> 00:07:23,141
Oh! Ha!
This is gonna be fun!
223
00:07:23,143 --> 00:07:25,110
Go, greeny birds!
224
00:07:25,112 --> 00:07:25,644
MURRAY: No.
225
00:07:25,646 --> 00:07:27,679
We have a system
when we watch football,
226
00:07:27,681 --> 00:07:30,649
and the number-one rule
of that system is no talking.
227
00:07:30,651 --> 00:07:33,185
ADULT ADAM: Naturally,
my mom respected the rules...
228
00:07:33,187 --> 00:07:34,853
Until the next week,
when she didn't.
229
00:07:34,855 --> 00:07:37,856
Are the players married
to the cheerleaders?
230
00:07:37,858 --> 00:07:39,357
Do you think
their families are mad
231
00:07:39,359 --> 00:07:40,425
'cause they work
on Sundays?
232
00:07:40,427 --> 00:07:42,260
Ugh! Look at
those grass stains.
233
00:07:42,262 --> 00:07:44,262
Who washes those pants?
234
00:07:44,264 --> 00:07:45,530
Aren't we all Patriots?
235
00:07:45,532 --> 00:07:47,265
Oh ho! Look at
that big, snuggly pileup.
236
00:07:47,267 --> 00:07:51,303
Why does the throwy guy
keep putting his hands
in the other guy's butt?
237
00:07:51,305 --> 00:07:53,638
I have a better name
for a team...
238
00:07:53,640 --> 00:07:55,073
The Yankee Doodles.
239
00:07:55,075 --> 00:07:55,607
(SIGHS DEEPLY)
240
00:07:55,609 --> 00:07:58,577
You know what?
Who wants bagel bites?
241
00:07:58,579 --> 00:08:00,445
'Cause I'm gonna
put some in the oven.
242
00:08:00,447 --> 00:08:02,447
What do I set it at?
2,000?
243
00:08:02,449 --> 00:08:03,748
No! Murray,
you know the rule.
244
00:08:03,750 --> 00:08:05,851
Don't touch any knobs
in the kitchen.
245
00:08:05,853 --> 00:08:09,554
Hey! Come back fast.
We need you on defense.
246
00:08:09,556 --> 00:08:11,289
Isn't this great?
247
00:08:11,291 --> 00:08:12,057
Woman's got to go.
248
00:08:12,059 --> 00:08:14,092
What? No! she's part
of the game ritual.
249
00:08:14,094 --> 00:08:14,926
There's no going back.
250
00:08:14,928 --> 00:08:16,995
A man needs time
away from his wife,
251
00:08:16,997 --> 00:08:19,464
and for me,
football is that time.
252
00:08:19,466 --> 00:08:21,566
So, what? You're just
gonna tell her to go away?
253
00:08:21,568 --> 00:08:23,101
You know mom.
It'll crush her.
254
00:08:23,103 --> 00:08:26,137
Don't worry.
I'll be sensitive.
255
00:08:27,908 --> 00:08:28,673
Hey, honey.
256
00:08:28,675 --> 00:08:31,309
Would you put that down
and get out?
257
00:08:31,311 --> 00:08:31,676
What?
258
00:08:31,678 --> 00:08:33,445
Listen, it's not
that I don't love
259
00:08:33,447 --> 00:08:34,913
spending every moment
with you,
260
00:08:34,915 --> 00:08:37,449
but you don't understand
football,
261
00:08:37,451 --> 00:08:38,316
and it's distracting.
262
00:08:38,318 --> 00:08:40,585
Well, that sounds
like an excuse.
263
00:08:40,587 --> 00:08:44,089
Okay, imagine if I go
to your scrapbook club
264
00:08:44,091 --> 00:08:44,890
and every few seconds,
265
00:08:44,892 --> 00:08:46,858
I interrupt you
with a question
266
00:08:46,860 --> 00:08:48,493
about what glitter
I should use.
267
00:08:48,495 --> 00:08:50,595
Well,
that would be ridiculous
268
00:08:50,597 --> 00:08:53,098
because there's opaque,
translucent, chunky,
269
00:08:53,100 --> 00:08:58,036
micro-fine, spray-on,
brush-on, squeeze-on...
270
00:08:58,038 --> 00:08:59,504
Oh.
271
00:09:00,741 --> 00:09:02,307
I get it.
272
00:09:02,309 --> 00:09:03,174
I'll go.
273
00:09:03,176 --> 00:09:04,175
That means a lot, Bevy.
274
00:09:04,177 --> 00:09:07,445
And that's
how you do marriage.
275
00:09:07,447 --> 00:09:09,781
And so my mom got the message.
276
00:09:09,783 --> 00:09:11,750
Teach me everything
about football.
277
00:09:11,752 --> 00:09:13,351
You've come
to the right place.
278
00:09:13,353 --> 00:09:15,620
It was just the wrong message.
279
00:09:17,691 --> 00:09:20,258
Let's start with the basics.
This is the quarterback.
280
00:09:20,260 --> 00:09:23,595
These are the linemen,
receivers, running back.
281
00:09:23,597 --> 00:09:24,129
Question...
282
00:09:24,131 --> 00:09:25,230
What do
all those words mean?
283
00:09:25,232 --> 00:09:28,533
Simplifying,
there's offense
and defense.
284
00:09:28,535 --> 00:09:32,203
Question... Are those things
I should already know?
285
00:09:32,205 --> 00:09:33,838
Simplifying...
286
00:09:33,840 --> 00:09:35,373
This is a football.
287
00:09:35,375 --> 00:09:36,141
Question...
288
00:09:36,143 --> 00:09:38,577
Is the plural of football
"feetball"?
289
00:09:38,579 --> 00:09:39,177
Ohh! God!
290
00:09:39,179 --> 00:09:42,514
Why won't anyone answer me?
What are you people hiding?
291
00:09:42,516 --> 00:09:44,082
My god. I can't
take this anymore.
292
00:09:44,084 --> 00:09:47,118
Look, there is only one way
to teach mom anything...
293
00:09:47,120 --> 00:09:49,588
Put it in terms
she understands.
294
00:09:49,590 --> 00:09:51,389
Okay,
this is a football,
295
00:09:51,391 --> 00:09:54,759
but I want you to imagine
it's actually me as a baby.
296
00:09:54,761 --> 00:09:56,094
Aww!
297
00:09:56,096 --> 00:09:56,828
(GASPS) ooh!
298
00:09:56,830 --> 00:10:00,332
Now, your job is to protect
that baby at all costs.
299
00:10:00,334 --> 00:10:01,866
Of course.
300
00:10:01,868 --> 00:10:02,367
Who are they?
301
00:10:02,369 --> 00:10:04,469
Hi, Erica! You called,
and I came right away.
302
00:10:04,471 --> 00:10:05,203
Isn't that nice of me?
303
00:10:05,205 --> 00:10:06,738
As you can see,
they're the enemy.
304
00:10:06,740 --> 00:10:08,373
We call them
the defensive line.
305
00:10:08,375 --> 00:10:09,207
Their job is to stop you.
306
00:10:09,209 --> 00:10:12,577
Translation... They're a band
of evil college recruiters,
307
00:10:12,579 --> 00:10:15,046
wanting to take
your precious
little girl away
308
00:10:15,048 --> 00:10:18,083
to an out-of-state
university.
309
00:10:18,085 --> 00:10:20,452
But that's too far.
How will I see you every day?
310
00:10:20,454 --> 00:10:22,053
You've only
got one choice...
311
00:10:22,055 --> 00:10:24,289
Get that baby
back to our house.
312
00:10:24,291 --> 00:10:25,390
Or the end zone.
313
00:10:25,392 --> 00:10:27,692
(CLEARS THROAT)
Please move.
314
00:10:27,694 --> 00:10:28,927
No way.
Please move!
315
00:10:28,929 --> 00:10:31,296
Oh, we're comin' for you.
Gimme that baby!
316
00:10:31,298 --> 00:10:32,764
Never!
Hike!
317
00:10:32,766 --> 00:10:34,399
Go! Go!
Oh.
318
00:10:34,401 --> 00:10:37,335
Go, go, go, go, go!
Go, go, go!
319
00:10:37,337 --> 00:10:38,370
Whoo!
320
00:10:38,372 --> 00:10:39,437
(LAUGHS)
321
00:10:39,439 --> 00:10:40,905
I made it home!
322
00:10:40,907 --> 00:10:42,107
I made it home.
323
00:10:42,109 --> 00:10:43,842
Or the end zone.
324
00:10:43,844 --> 00:10:45,744
Oh! I get it!
325
00:10:45,746 --> 00:10:47,112
Come on, guys.
Where's the "D"?
326
00:10:47,114 --> 00:10:48,513
I just don't know
where to touch her.
327
00:10:48,515 --> 00:10:49,981
Maybe I should
just cover Erica.
328
00:10:49,983 --> 00:10:51,383
I hate you so much,
Geoff.
329
00:10:51,385 --> 00:10:53,118
Shut it, okay?
It's enough.
330
00:10:53,120 --> 00:10:54,886
While my mom
was ready for game day,
331
00:10:54,888 --> 00:10:56,888
I was ready
for my game-show debut.
332
00:10:56,890 --> 00:10:59,491
Hi, kids. I'm Zane,
and this is Ellen.
333
00:10:59,493 --> 00:11:01,793
We've set up
a practice course
334
00:11:01,795 --> 00:11:04,362
to simulate
actual Double Dare.
335
00:11:04,364 --> 00:11:05,530
Now pick a partner.
336
00:11:05,532 --> 00:11:07,966
That's right.
Let's get messy!
337
00:11:07,968 --> 00:11:10,969
Yep, I knew exactly
how to wow the producers.
338
00:11:10,971 --> 00:11:14,372
Three words...
Make an entrance.
339
00:11:14,374 --> 00:11:15,140
Sorry we're late.
340
00:11:15,142 --> 00:11:17,976
Me and my best friend
got held up on the public bus.
341
00:11:17,978 --> 00:11:21,079
No way. You can't
pick a cute old man.
342
00:11:21,081 --> 00:11:21,913
That's not fair.
343
00:11:21,915 --> 00:11:24,249
Sorry, sister...
Not against the rules.
344
00:11:24,251 --> 00:11:26,151
I checked.
(ALL GROAN)
345
00:11:26,153 --> 00:11:29,554
What kind of
a farkakte game
show is this?
346
00:11:29,556 --> 00:11:30,722
I thought
it was just trivia.
347
00:11:30,724 --> 00:11:33,591
Oh, it is.
And some physical
challenges.
348
00:11:33,593 --> 00:11:36,127
It looks slimy
and unsafe.
349
00:11:36,129 --> 00:11:38,296
You're Pops!
You can do anything!
350
00:11:38,298 --> 00:11:40,165
What the (BLEEP)
is that thing?
351
00:11:40,167 --> 00:11:42,233
You play tennis
and date twins
352
00:11:42,235 --> 00:11:44,402
and drink martinis
when the sun's out.
353
00:11:44,404 --> 00:11:47,338
Yes, I do sample from
the salad bar of life.
354
00:11:47,340 --> 00:11:48,973
Then let's show 'em
what we're made of.
355
00:11:48,975 --> 00:11:51,609
(GRUNTING)
Go, go, go!
You got it.
356
00:11:51,611 --> 00:11:53,812
I can't find
the damn flag.
357
00:11:53,814 --> 00:11:54,746
Look under
the pad of butter!
358
00:11:54,748 --> 00:11:56,681
They always hide it
under the pad of butter!
359
00:11:56,683 --> 00:11:59,884
Aw,
there's no flag here!
360
00:12:00,687 --> 00:12:01,219
(GRUNTING)
361
00:12:01,221 --> 00:12:04,155
This is
my good tracksuit!
362
00:12:04,157 --> 00:12:06,024
(GROANS)
363
00:12:06,460 --> 00:12:07,859
Why am I here?
364
00:12:07,861 --> 00:12:10,462
Oh, no, no!
365
00:12:10,464 --> 00:12:11,396
(GROANS)
366
00:12:11,398 --> 00:12:13,465
This is not
a game show!
367
00:12:13,467 --> 00:12:15,066
Faster!
(GROANS)
368
00:12:15,068 --> 00:12:16,101
Po... (SIGHS)
369
00:12:16,103 --> 00:12:18,803
I'm not a hamster!
I'm a human man!
370
00:12:18,805 --> 00:12:22,307
That...
Did not go well.
371
00:12:22,309 --> 00:12:23,308
No, it did not.
372
00:12:23,310 --> 00:12:25,043
I'm sorry
I let you down, kiddo.
373
00:12:25,045 --> 00:12:27,612
I'm gonna dig my watch
out of the butter and leave.
374
00:12:27,614 --> 00:12:30,949
Well, how'd it go
with your adorable
best friend?
375
00:12:30,951 --> 00:12:31,983
Great. So great.
376
00:12:31,985 --> 00:12:33,885
Listen,
I was thinking...
377
00:12:33,887 --> 00:12:36,187
Our friendship
is too important.
378
00:12:36,189 --> 00:12:37,922
We should be partners.
379
00:12:37,924 --> 00:12:38,790
I don't think so.
380
00:12:38,792 --> 00:12:40,425
See, I already got
a partner.
381
00:12:40,427 --> 00:12:43,461
You ready to rock,
muscles?
382
00:12:43,830 --> 00:12:44,462
Seriously?
383
00:12:44,464 --> 00:12:47,265
Of all the people,
you ditch me for that putz?
384
00:12:47,267 --> 00:12:48,299
Now you know
how it feels.
385
00:12:48,301 --> 00:12:51,636
Well, we'll see how you feel
when Handsome Ben chokes.
386
00:12:51,638 --> 00:12:54,139
He's got the looks,
but not the chops.
387
00:12:54,141 --> 00:12:55,039
(LAUGHS) done.
388
00:12:55,041 --> 00:12:57,609
And I got
the course record, too.
389
00:12:59,246 --> 00:13:00,411
Balls!
390
00:13:00,413 --> 00:13:02,747
That is one hard schnoz.
391
00:13:02,749 --> 00:13:04,983
As I was losing
a best friend...
392
00:13:04,985 --> 00:13:05,683
Set...hike!
393
00:13:05,685 --> 00:13:09,120
...my mom was learning
how to win at feetball.
394
00:13:12,092 --> 00:13:13,992
(LAUGHING)
Touchdown!
395
00:13:13,994 --> 00:13:15,426
Whoo!
396
00:13:15,428 --> 00:13:16,361
Oh, yeah!
397
00:13:16,363 --> 00:13:17,262
You're in my house now!
398
00:13:17,264 --> 00:13:21,900
You're gonna come in
and take off your shoes
'cause I just vacuumed.
399
00:13:21,902 --> 00:13:24,135
That's how "in my house"
you are!
400
00:13:24,137 --> 00:13:24,569
Whoo!
401
00:13:24,571 --> 00:13:26,171
I think our work
here is done.
402
00:13:26,173 --> 00:13:29,808
I have a feeling your dad
is gonna be a very happy man!
403
00:13:29,810 --> 00:13:31,976
BEVERLY:
Let's go, Eagles "D"!
404
00:13:31,978 --> 00:13:32,944
Sack!
BARRY: Yes!
405
00:13:32,946 --> 00:13:34,412
(LAUGHS)
Yes, baby.
406
00:13:34,414 --> 00:13:37,749
Turns out learning football
just ruined it for my dad.
407
00:13:37,751 --> 00:13:39,150
Isn't this great?
408
00:13:39,152 --> 00:13:39,818
Mur,
you got it all.
409
00:13:39,820 --> 00:13:41,853
Yeah, she did
the thing I asked her to do,
410
00:13:41,855 --> 00:13:43,521
so it'd be wrong of me
to complain.
411
00:13:43,523 --> 00:13:46,257
Watch... Next play, they're
gonna throw the long ball.
412
00:13:46,259 --> 00:13:47,492
That's nuts.
It's third and short.
413
00:13:47,494 --> 00:13:48,660
They're gonna go
up the middle.
414
00:13:48,662 --> 00:13:50,261
No. They're expecting
the rush.
415
00:13:50,263 --> 00:13:53,731
Gah! Stop saying things
with sports-fueled knowledge!
416
00:13:53,733 --> 00:13:55,333
Let's all just not talk
until the Eagles win, okay?
417
00:13:55,335 --> 00:14:00,071
Unfortunately for my dad,
they really were
expecting the rush.
418
00:14:00,073 --> 00:14:02,240
Boom! Ha ha!
419
00:14:02,242 --> 00:14:03,141
Who called it?
420
00:14:03,143 --> 00:14:05,343
Mama bird... That's who!
421
00:14:05,345 --> 00:14:06,177
Face!
422
00:14:06,179 --> 00:14:07,812
Aah! That's it!
423
00:14:07,814 --> 00:14:09,380
You got to go.
424
00:14:09,382 --> 00:14:10,882
Go?
425
00:14:10,884 --> 00:14:11,316
But...
426
00:14:11,318 --> 00:14:14,819
I learned football.
(CHUCKLING)
I did what you said.
427
00:14:14,821 --> 00:14:16,154
Thing is, I lied.
428
00:14:16,156 --> 00:14:19,824
Look, I think the key to
a good marriage is time apart,
429
00:14:19,826 --> 00:14:22,193
and for me,
football is that time.
430
00:14:22,195 --> 00:14:24,395
Well, I think the key
to a good marriage
431
00:14:24,397 --> 00:14:26,698
is spending time
together.
432
00:14:26,700 --> 00:14:30,134
But if you don't
want me here...
433
00:14:30,136 --> 00:14:31,803
I'll go.
434
00:14:32,706 --> 00:14:34,906
While my Double Dare
dreams had been dashed,
435
00:14:34,908 --> 00:14:36,608
Emmy's were looking
better than ever,
436
00:14:36,610 --> 00:14:39,844
thanks to athletic, horrible
Handsome Ben.
437
00:14:39,846 --> 00:14:41,246
Look at Handsome Ben go.
438
00:14:41,248 --> 00:14:43,248
His feet barely
touch the slime.
439
00:14:43,250 --> 00:14:45,783
I feel like
it's right...
440
00:14:45,785 --> 00:14:46,384
Here.
441
00:14:46,386 --> 00:14:48,519
Yes!
Yes! Got it! come on.
442
00:14:48,521 --> 00:14:49,721
Well done,
kids!
443
00:14:49,723 --> 00:14:51,723
Looks like you two
are the team to beat.
444
00:14:51,725 --> 00:14:54,325
Couldn't ask
for a better partner.
445
00:14:54,327 --> 00:14:55,293
(CHUCKLES)
446
00:14:55,295 --> 00:14:57,896
I think that was
directed at you.
447
00:14:57,898 --> 00:14:59,530
Yes!
Thank you, Dave Kim.
448
00:14:59,532 --> 00:15:02,634
Looks like all of
those months of
practice with Emmy
449
00:15:02,636 --> 00:15:04,235
really paid off.
450
00:15:04,437 --> 00:15:06,271
Whoa, whoa, whoa!
Months?
451
00:15:06,273 --> 00:15:09,340
Yeah, we overheard
Coach Mellor at
the beginning of the year
452
00:15:09,342 --> 00:15:10,508
saying Double Dare
was coming.
453
00:15:10,510 --> 00:15:13,411
That's when we agreed
to partner up and...
Pbht! What?
454
00:15:13,413 --> 00:15:15,213
Handsome Ben's
just confused.
455
00:15:15,215 --> 00:15:15,980
Let me get this
straight.
456
00:15:15,982 --> 00:15:18,016
You picked him
before I even asked you?
457
00:15:18,018 --> 00:15:20,585
Kinda.
You've been torturing
me for a week,
458
00:15:20,587 --> 00:15:22,253
and you did
the exact same thing!
459
00:15:22,255 --> 00:15:24,622
I was at least gonna lie
and let you down easy.
460
00:15:24,624 --> 00:15:25,657
Well, you make
a great team...
461
00:15:25,659 --> 00:15:28,192
Handsome Ben and
"sack of crap" Emmy.
462
00:15:28,194 --> 00:15:30,061
Take it back, nerd!
463
00:15:30,363 --> 00:15:31,663
ADULT ADAM: Sure, it was
an honest accident.
464
00:15:31,665 --> 00:15:33,765
However,
what happened next wasn't.
465
00:15:33,767 --> 00:15:36,567
After that,
no one was at their best.
466
00:15:36,569 --> 00:15:38,236
Whoa, whoa!
467
00:15:38,738 --> 00:15:40,204
Both of you... Out!
468
00:15:40,206 --> 00:15:41,239
But you said
I was a lock.
469
00:15:41,241 --> 00:15:44,442
That was before you made
a mess of this course.
470
00:15:44,444 --> 00:15:46,077
Now go.
471
00:15:48,381 --> 00:15:49,614
Thanks a lot.
472
00:15:49,616 --> 00:15:53,985
Well, looks like
you're gonna need
a new partner.
473
00:15:53,987 --> 00:15:55,753
For sure.
474
00:15:55,755 --> 00:15:57,488
Hey, Amy,
be my partner?
475
00:15:57,490 --> 00:16:00,224
Definitely.
You're handsome.
476
00:16:00,794 --> 00:16:04,529
Dave Kim...
Always a bridesmaid.
477
00:16:07,801 --> 00:16:10,768
ADULT ADAM:
My dad knew he needed
to make it right with my mom.
478
00:16:10,770 --> 00:16:13,938
Only problem...
He had no idea how.
479
00:16:13,940 --> 00:16:15,707
(CLANKING)
480
00:16:15,709 --> 00:16:18,843
Time to cook
the steak-umms!
481
00:16:18,845 --> 00:16:20,244
Hope I don't make
a mess!
482
00:16:20,246 --> 00:16:22,547
Why are you narrating
your kitchen experience?
483
00:16:22,549 --> 00:16:25,283
I'm trying to lure
your mother downstairs.
484
00:16:25,285 --> 00:16:27,518
I don't know what's wrong.
This always works.
485
00:16:27,520 --> 00:16:29,220
Yeah, well, you really
hurt her feelings.
486
00:16:29,222 --> 00:16:31,456
You're a, uh,
lady person.
487
00:16:31,458 --> 00:16:32,156
How do I un-hurt them?
488
00:16:32,158 --> 00:16:34,926
Hello? Mom took an interest
in something you love.
489
00:16:34,928 --> 00:16:37,061
Just show her that you
can do the same thing.
490
00:16:37,063 --> 00:16:39,297
What... Like yakking
on the phone, shopping,
491
00:16:39,299 --> 00:16:42,500
or pushing the hot thing
over the clothes?
492
00:16:42,502 --> 00:16:43,468
Ironing?
493
00:16:43,470 --> 00:16:44,202
No, those are chores.
494
00:16:44,204 --> 00:16:46,604
I'm talking about stuff
that makes her happy,
495
00:16:46,606 --> 00:16:47,338
like jazzercise.
496
00:16:47,340 --> 00:16:49,607
That dancy thing
where she puts on
the stretchy clothes
497
00:16:49,609 --> 00:16:51,909
and rolls around
on the ground like
a drunk toddler?
498
00:16:51,911 --> 00:16:54,979
Good point. You should focus
on something more your speed.
499
00:16:54,981 --> 00:16:57,648
And by speed,
I mean no speed.
500
00:16:58,051 --> 00:16:59,217
I got it.
501
00:16:59,219 --> 00:16:59,817
Son of a bitch!
502
00:16:59,819 --> 00:17:02,320
This can't be done!
No one can do it!
503
00:17:02,322 --> 00:17:04,155
What exactly
are you doing?
504
00:17:04,157 --> 00:17:04,989
Scrapbooking...
505
00:17:04,991 --> 00:17:06,924
Your mother's
favorite hobby.
506
00:17:06,926 --> 00:17:08,426
But it's a nightmare!
507
00:17:08,428 --> 00:17:09,394
Stupid glue!
508
00:17:09,396 --> 00:17:11,429
Everything I touch
sticks to me!
509
00:17:11,431 --> 00:17:12,597
Just calm down, okay?
510
00:17:12,599 --> 00:17:14,332
I'm sure what
you made is fine.
511
00:17:14,334 --> 00:17:16,567
(HORROR MUSIC PLAYS)
512
00:17:17,470 --> 00:17:19,404
Holy crap!
What is that?
513
00:17:19,406 --> 00:17:20,004
Our sweet memories.
514
00:17:20,006 --> 00:17:21,472
Why did you cut out
the letters?
515
00:17:21,474 --> 00:17:22,473
It looks like
a ransom note.
516
00:17:22,475 --> 00:17:24,642
You know I'm not good
at penmanship!
517
00:17:24,644 --> 00:17:25,343
Why'd you put "look"?
518
00:17:25,345 --> 00:17:27,712
What am I supposed
to look at...
His red demon eyes?
519
00:17:27,714 --> 00:17:29,480
I was trying to make them
sparkle with glitter,
520
00:17:29,482 --> 00:17:32,517
but no one tells you
how complicated
glitter is.
521
00:17:32,519 --> 00:17:35,620
It looks like something
a 10-year-old serial killer
would make.
522
00:17:35,622 --> 00:17:36,220
I know!
523
00:17:36,222 --> 00:17:39,757
Let me break this down for
you in terms you understand.
524
00:17:39,859 --> 00:17:43,194
Imagine this page
is the football field
525
00:17:43,196 --> 00:17:45,797
and this baby picture...
The quarterback.
526
00:17:45,799 --> 00:17:47,598
ADULT ADAM:
As Erica was coaching my dad,
527
00:17:47,600 --> 00:17:49,767
Coach Mellor had
the Double Dare results.
528
00:17:49,769 --> 00:17:50,802
All right,
listen up.
529
00:17:50,804 --> 00:17:53,438
I just found out who got
picked for the game show
530
00:17:53,440 --> 00:17:56,541
that left all sorts of
stains on my gym floor.
531
00:17:56,543 --> 00:18:00,078
And our new TV stars are...
532
00:18:00,180 --> 00:18:02,780
...Handsome Ben
and Regular Amy.
533
00:18:02,782 --> 00:18:04,382
We're in! We did it!
Yes!
534
00:18:04,384 --> 00:18:05,016
Wait... What?
535
00:18:05,018 --> 00:18:06,784
Turns out
losing out on Double Dare
536
00:18:06,786 --> 00:18:10,621
isn't nearly as bad
as losing your best friend.
537
00:18:11,324 --> 00:18:12,790
(SIGHS)
538
00:18:19,032 --> 00:18:19,497
Hey.
539
00:18:19,499 --> 00:18:21,532
I'm not talking
to you, jackass.
540
00:18:21,534 --> 00:18:23,234
That should've been me.
541
00:18:23,236 --> 00:18:24,602
It should've been us.
542
00:18:24,604 --> 00:18:26,504
There is no us.
543
00:18:26,840 --> 00:18:31,342
Look, I don't blame
you for picking Ben
two months ago.
544
00:18:31,344 --> 00:18:32,810
He's not my rival.
545
00:18:32,812 --> 00:18:34,979
He's just amazing.
546
00:18:35,148 --> 00:18:37,115
I guess...
547
00:18:37,984 --> 00:18:39,684
I'm a jackass, too.
548
00:18:39,686 --> 00:18:40,785
Little bit.
549
00:18:40,787 --> 00:18:41,352
(BOTH CHUCKLE)
550
00:18:41,354 --> 00:18:44,055
So much for always
having each other's backs.
551
00:18:44,057 --> 00:18:46,424
I mean, Double Dare
tore us apart.
552
00:18:46,426 --> 00:18:47,825
So fast.
553
00:18:47,827 --> 00:18:50,828
Are we, like,
terrible best friends?
554
00:18:50,830 --> 00:18:52,396
Maybe.
555
00:18:52,398 --> 00:18:53,097
But if we are,
556
00:18:53,099 --> 00:18:55,466
I hope we're terrible
best friends forever.
557
00:18:55,468 --> 00:18:58,636
I'm talking graduation,
college, law school.
558
00:18:58,638 --> 00:19:01,038
Hell, I'm gonna be
the bro of honor
at your wedding.
559
00:19:01,040 --> 00:19:04,709
And when you're like 100
and at an old-age home,
560
00:19:04,711 --> 00:19:06,711
I'm gonna be watching
Double Dare
561
00:19:06,713 --> 00:19:08,045
right there
next to you.
562
00:19:08,047 --> 00:19:08,913
(CHUCKLES)
563
00:19:08,915 --> 00:19:11,249
You think
it'll still be on?
564
00:19:11,251 --> 00:19:13,184
Oh, for sure.
565
00:19:14,420 --> 00:19:15,987
I made you something.
566
00:19:15,989 --> 00:19:17,522
What is this?
567
00:19:17,524 --> 00:19:20,224
I know how hard you worked
learning my favorite thing,
568
00:19:20,226 --> 00:19:23,561
so I thought it was time
I learned about yours.
569
00:19:24,063 --> 00:19:25,463
¶ Stay with me
570
00:19:25,465 --> 00:19:28,232
You made a scrapbook
for me?
571
00:19:28,234 --> 00:19:30,968
Pretty good, huh?
No. It's a train wreck.
572
00:19:30,970 --> 00:19:32,937
You glittered
where you should've laced,
573
00:19:32,939 --> 00:19:35,106
and you laced where
you should've stenciled.
574
00:19:35,108 --> 00:19:36,841
It's all so complicated!
575
00:19:36,843 --> 00:19:38,442
Doesn't matter.
576
00:19:38,444 --> 00:19:39,343
I love it.
577
00:19:39,345 --> 00:19:40,912
Look, I'm lucky
to have a wife
578
00:19:40,914 --> 00:19:43,714
who wants to spend time
with a man like me.
579
00:19:43,716 --> 00:19:45,449
So what do you say...
580
00:19:45,451 --> 00:19:48,553
Next time, I tag along
to your scrapbook club?
581
00:19:48,555 --> 00:19:49,987
You were right.
582
00:19:49,989 --> 00:19:53,157
Scrapbooking is
my time away.
583
00:19:53,159 --> 00:19:55,026
You just stick
with your feetball.
584
00:19:55,028 --> 00:19:56,594
ADULT ADAM:
With that, my parents decided
585
00:19:56,596 --> 00:19:58,529
to give each other
some space...
586
00:19:58,531 --> 00:20:01,132
Until the Eagles fumbled.
587
00:20:01,134 --> 00:20:01,666
Aah!
588
00:20:01,668 --> 00:20:02,900
That's it.
Season's over.
589
00:20:02,902 --> 00:20:05,203
No, all we need's
a touchdown,
590
00:20:05,205 --> 00:20:06,470
an onside kick,
a field goal,
591
00:20:06,472 --> 00:20:07,939
and then
two more touchdowns.
592
00:20:07,941 --> 00:20:08,539
Stop it.
593
00:20:08,541 --> 00:20:10,274
Off to the craft store.
Be back in a jiff.
594
00:20:10,276 --> 00:20:11,542
No, no, no!
Wait, wait, wait!
595
00:20:11,544 --> 00:20:13,211
Come here, come here,
come here, come here.
596
00:20:13,213 --> 00:20:15,746
I think the Eagles could
use some of your luck.
597
00:20:15,748 --> 00:20:16,380
¶ Stay with me
598
00:20:16,382 --> 00:20:19,584
ADULT ADAM: That's the thing
about the relationships
that matter most.
599
00:20:19,586 --> 00:20:22,620
Sure, they get messy,
and sometimes you fumble,
600
00:20:22,622 --> 00:20:25,556
but when you're a team,
you always win.
601
00:20:25,558 --> 00:20:28,226
Ben and Amy,
on what TV series
602
00:20:28,228 --> 00:20:31,128
does Andy Griffith
regularly play a lawyer?
603
00:20:31,130 --> 00:20:32,530
Matlock.
Yes, right again.
604
00:20:32,532 --> 00:20:33,965
(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)
You have another $10.
605
00:20:33,967 --> 00:20:36,033
Guess we should
call her "Smart Amy".
606
00:20:36,035 --> 00:20:38,002
¶ Beautiful girl ¶
607
00:20:39,505 --> 00:20:41,405
Ben and Amy,
on what TV series
608
00:20:41,407 --> 00:20:44,609
does Andy Griffith
regularly play a lawyer?
609
00:20:44,611 --> 00:20:47,211
Matlock.
Yes, right again.
610
00:21:13,773 --> 00:21:16,540
Aah!
It never ends!
611
00:21:16,542 --> 00:21:17,875
(GROANS)
612
00:21:22,215 --> 00:21:24,115
Come on, big tasty!
Dig deep!
613
00:21:24,117 --> 00:21:26,183
Goldberg! What the hell
are you doing?
614
00:21:26,185 --> 00:21:27,885
Tryouts were yesterday.
615
00:21:28,655 --> 00:21:30,488
Tryouts for what?