1 00:00:01,402 --> 00:00:03,537 Adult Adam: Back in the '80s, before you could buy everything 2 00:00:03,571 --> 00:00:04,938 from your couch, you had to drive 3 00:00:04,972 --> 00:00:06,674 to an actual location to get stuff. 4 00:00:06,707 --> 00:00:09,543 This magical place was known as "the mall." 5 00:00:09,577 --> 00:00:12,280 It was the center of every teenager's universe. 6 00:00:12,313 --> 00:00:15,349 And nobody loved the mall more than my brother and sister. 7 00:00:15,383 --> 00:00:17,618 Mmm! Hickory farms samples! 8 00:00:17,651 --> 00:00:18,886 What's better than free meat? 9 00:00:18,919 --> 00:00:20,454 Do you even know what you're eating right now? 10 00:00:20,488 --> 00:00:23,257 Hello? It's summer sausage. 11 00:00:23,291 --> 00:00:25,659 It's delicious because it's made by the sun. 12 00:00:25,693 --> 00:00:28,062 This just might be the best day of my life. 13 00:00:28,096 --> 00:00:29,597 Oh, no! 14 00:00:29,630 --> 00:00:32,066 Adult Adam: For my brother, the mall took a dark turn 15 00:00:32,100 --> 00:00:33,667 when it was time to make the lemonade. 16 00:00:33,701 --> 00:00:36,504 Attention, perverts! 17 00:00:36,537 --> 00:00:39,006 Look away from the hot dog on a stick girl 18 00:00:39,039 --> 00:00:40,374 or face my fury! 19 00:00:41,142 --> 00:00:42,476 Uh, Barry? What's the deal? 20 00:00:42,510 --> 00:00:44,912 Well, honey, similar to Bruce Lee in enter the dragon, 21 00:00:44,945 --> 00:00:47,381 I am about to fight everyone! 22 00:00:47,415 --> 00:00:50,084 Erica, hold my meat. Hold your own meat! 23 00:00:50,118 --> 00:00:52,753 Babe, these guys aren't here just to watch me make lemonade. 24 00:00:52,786 --> 00:00:54,455 They do it for everyone. See? Look at Dave Kim. 25 00:00:54,488 --> 00:00:56,157 Boo! (Crowd groans) 26 00:00:56,190 --> 00:00:57,425 That's right, that's right. 27 00:00:57,458 --> 00:00:58,559 Walk away. 28 00:00:58,592 --> 00:00:59,827 Will you stop it? 29 00:00:59,860 --> 00:01:01,061 I want to keep this job. 30 00:01:01,095 --> 00:01:03,030 The money's good, and I got my eye on one of those. 31 00:01:03,063 --> 00:01:05,166 The best yellow boom box money can buy. 32 00:01:05,199 --> 00:01:06,300 Look at all that yellow! 33 00:01:06,334 --> 00:01:09,036 It's so compact and waterproof. 34 00:01:09,069 --> 00:01:10,504 That's perfect for my swim routine. 35 00:01:10,538 --> 00:01:11,739 Well, keep dreaming, 36 00:01:11,772 --> 00:01:13,441 'cause there's no way dad's ever gonna buy us one. 37 00:01:13,474 --> 00:01:14,908 Well, you could always get jobs. 38 00:01:14,942 --> 00:01:16,110 A job? 39 00:01:16,144 --> 00:01:18,346 How would I be able to spend time after school at the mall 40 00:01:18,379 --> 00:01:20,114 if I already have a job after school at the mall? 41 00:01:20,148 --> 00:01:23,384 Eh, too bad, 'cause they're hiring at Spencer's gifts. 42 00:01:23,417 --> 00:01:24,918 Adult Adam: Ah, Spencer's gifts, 43 00:01:24,952 --> 00:01:26,254 the mall's one and only novelty store 44 00:01:26,287 --> 00:01:29,923 that specialized in wacky gag gifts guaranteed to offend. 45 00:01:29,957 --> 00:01:31,159 Both: Whoa! 46 00:01:31,192 --> 00:01:33,727 I can actually get a job at the store 47 00:01:33,761 --> 00:01:36,497 I bought two of my four spuds MacKenzie posters? 48 00:01:36,530 --> 00:01:38,266 This is a dream come true! 49 00:01:38,299 --> 00:01:39,833 'Cause I need money and they're hiring! 50 00:01:41,502 --> 00:01:43,671 Dad, we need you to sign a permission slip. 51 00:01:43,704 --> 00:01:45,506 Ask your mother. She's not home. 52 00:01:45,539 --> 00:01:46,674 I hope it's not time-sensitive. 53 00:01:46,707 --> 00:01:47,841 Good luck to both of you. 54 00:01:47,875 --> 00:01:49,443 We both got jobs at Spencer's gifts, 55 00:01:49,477 --> 00:01:51,111 and we can't start until we get parental consent. 56 00:01:51,145 --> 00:01:52,646 Give it to me! I'll sign it right now! 57 00:01:52,680 --> 00:01:54,348 Before you do, you should really understand 58 00:01:54,382 --> 00:01:55,816 what you're agreeing to. I agree. 59 00:01:55,849 --> 00:01:58,018 Just know if you sign that slip, there's a good chance 60 00:01:58,051 --> 00:02:00,020 we'll become fully independent and move out. 61 00:02:00,053 --> 00:02:01,121 Damn it, where's my pen? 62 00:02:01,155 --> 00:02:02,390 You might not even have to pay for college. 63 00:02:02,423 --> 00:02:03,991 I need my pen! Here you go, father. 64 00:02:04,024 --> 00:02:06,694 Let's sign this baby. 65 00:02:06,727 --> 00:02:09,363 And that's just one of the many hilarious items 66 00:02:09,397 --> 00:02:10,898 we'll be selling at Spencer's gifts. 67 00:02:10,931 --> 00:02:14,335 Not even you being a moron can spoil my mood. 68 00:02:14,368 --> 00:02:16,804 This is the greatest day of my life! 69 00:02:16,837 --> 00:02:18,472 Uh, this'll work. 70 00:02:18,506 --> 00:02:20,174 * I'm twisted up inside 71 00:02:20,208 --> 00:02:23,143 * but nonetheless i feel the need to say 72 00:02:26,046 --> 00:02:27,681 * I don't know the future 73 00:02:27,715 --> 00:02:30,384 * but the past keeps getting clearer every day * 74 00:02:31,585 --> 00:02:35,323 * I see your true colors shining through * 75 00:02:35,356 --> 00:02:37,525 adult Adam: It was February 15th, 1980-something, 76 00:02:37,558 --> 00:02:39,360 and I was hard at work honing my skills 77 00:02:39,393 --> 00:02:41,795 as a vhs home-movie maker. 78 00:02:41,829 --> 00:02:43,931 Not everyone was a fan, but there was 79 00:02:43,964 --> 00:02:47,100 one blond-haired lady who couldn't get enough. 80 00:02:47,134 --> 00:02:48,502 Yeah, i stare at him, too. 81 00:02:48,536 --> 00:02:49,603 (Chuckles) 82 00:02:49,637 --> 00:02:51,572 It's hard to believe that the bigger he gets, 83 00:02:51,605 --> 00:02:53,541 the more delicious he becomes, huh? 84 00:02:53,574 --> 00:02:55,376 Erica: Are we looking at the same thing? 85 00:02:55,409 --> 00:02:57,177 The hell is in your son's hands right now? 86 00:02:57,211 --> 00:03:00,381 Why does he have a waterproof sports boombox with mega bass 87 00:03:00,414 --> 00:03:02,583 when we had to get jobs to get one? 88 00:03:02,616 --> 00:03:04,352 Adam is not like the two of you. 89 00:03:04,385 --> 00:03:06,820 He can't just work any old job. 90 00:03:06,854 --> 00:03:09,122 He's, uh... What do I want to say here... 91 00:03:09,156 --> 00:03:10,524 Better than you. 92 00:03:10,558 --> 00:03:11,692 He's better than you! You can't say that! 93 00:03:11,725 --> 00:03:13,461 I knew you'd understand. 94 00:03:13,494 --> 00:03:16,897 Dad, tell your wife to tell your boy son 95 00:03:16,930 --> 00:03:18,666 that he needs to get a job, like the rest of us. 96 00:03:18,699 --> 00:03:20,234 Hey, moron! 97 00:03:20,268 --> 00:03:21,969 Get a job, like the other two morons. 98 00:03:22,002 --> 00:03:24,938 No, thanks. See, I'm not so much the job guy. 99 00:03:24,972 --> 00:03:27,074 I'm more the guy behind the job guy 100 00:03:27,107 --> 00:03:28,742 who just sits there and plays with his toys. 101 00:03:28,776 --> 00:03:31,011 You get it. I don't. Get a job. 102 00:03:31,044 --> 00:03:34,214 No, n-n-n-n-n-n-no. Adam doesn't need a job. 103 00:03:34,248 --> 00:03:36,016 He's already got a career. Doing what? 104 00:03:36,049 --> 00:03:38,819 Adam is going to be a famous director. 105 00:03:38,852 --> 00:03:40,621 Mmm. And if you don't believe me, 106 00:03:40,654 --> 00:03:42,323 just ask his guidance counselor. 107 00:03:42,356 --> 00:03:44,625 No, your son would do miserably in Hollywood, 108 00:03:44,658 --> 00:03:45,826 and that's a fact. 109 00:03:45,859 --> 00:03:48,095 My son is a star, and you're gonna die alone! 110 00:03:48,128 --> 00:03:49,630 While I do feel that way, 111 00:03:49,663 --> 00:03:51,332 I'm just stating the hard truth. 112 00:03:51,365 --> 00:03:53,066 It's more likely that your puny son 113 00:03:53,100 --> 00:03:54,968 will become a power forward for the sixers 114 00:03:55,002 --> 00:03:56,404 than a big Hollywood muckety-muck. 115 00:03:56,437 --> 00:03:57,571 Oh, no, mama. 116 00:03:57,605 --> 00:03:59,373 I don't want to play whatever sport he's talking about. 117 00:03:59,407 --> 00:04:00,774 Don't worry, sweet potato. 118 00:04:00,808 --> 00:04:02,276 Mr. glascott doesn't know anything. 119 00:04:02,310 --> 00:04:03,944 Oh, but I do. 120 00:04:03,977 --> 00:04:05,946 You see, I once made my way out to la. 121 00:04:05,979 --> 00:04:07,481 With my own foolish dreams. 122 00:04:07,515 --> 00:04:10,618 I thought I'd become a big-time Hollywood scriptwriter. 123 00:04:10,651 --> 00:04:12,219 I even wrote a teleplay. 124 00:04:12,953 --> 00:04:14,422 "Sole brothers"? 125 00:04:14,455 --> 00:04:16,957 Mr. glascott: That's "sole" spelled s-o-l-e. 126 00:04:16,990 --> 00:04:19,493 Upon their father's death, two brothers take the reins, 127 00:04:19,527 --> 00:04:22,830 or laces of the family shoe store. 128 00:04:22,863 --> 00:04:25,165 They're detectives, but they have different styles. 129 00:04:26,700 --> 00:04:28,168 You really need to read it. No, I don't. 130 00:04:28,201 --> 00:04:29,603 What are you telling my boy? 131 00:04:29,637 --> 00:04:31,839 I'm telling your son the same thing Robert Wagner told me 132 00:04:31,872 --> 00:04:33,707 when I approached him in the men's room at chasen's, 133 00:04:33,741 --> 00:04:35,042 "this is inappropriate." 134 00:04:35,075 --> 00:04:36,544 Okay, let me clean this up. 135 00:04:36,577 --> 00:04:38,379 He's saying you're definitely not gonna make it. 136 00:04:38,412 --> 00:04:39,780 Good talk. 137 00:04:39,813 --> 00:04:41,482 But mom believes in me. 138 00:04:41,515 --> 00:04:43,216 Yeah, well, she also believes 139 00:04:43,250 --> 00:04:45,486 that Erica's gonna be on the cover of rolling stone 140 00:04:45,519 --> 00:04:47,521 and Barry's gonna be a surgeon. 141 00:04:47,555 --> 00:04:50,123 Oh, sweet balls! None of those things are ever gonna happen! 142 00:04:50,157 --> 00:04:51,392 I have to get a job. 143 00:04:51,425 --> 00:04:54,528 But you already have one, making wonderful home movies 144 00:04:54,562 --> 00:04:56,430 and winning the academy award of my heart. 145 00:04:56,464 --> 00:04:57,631 Mom, it's okay. 146 00:04:57,665 --> 00:05:00,668 Based on Mr. glascott's tale of broken dreams, 147 00:05:00,701 --> 00:05:01,902 I should explore my options. 148 00:05:01,935 --> 00:05:04,505 Okay, fine. You can try one job. 149 00:05:04,538 --> 00:05:07,240 But as soon as everyone realizes that this a detour 150 00:05:07,274 --> 00:05:09,410 from what is obviously your destiny, 151 00:05:09,443 --> 00:05:11,645 you're going back to being my little moviemaker. 152 00:05:11,679 --> 00:05:13,647 Boom! He's getting a job. 153 00:05:13,681 --> 00:05:15,215 There you go. 154 00:05:15,248 --> 00:05:16,684 Oh, speaking of my screenplay, 155 00:05:16,717 --> 00:05:19,953 I mocked up a poster to help sell it in the room. 156 00:05:19,987 --> 00:05:23,290 These are twin shoe salesmen/detectives, 157 00:05:23,323 --> 00:05:25,459 Jeffrey sole and David Alan brothers. 158 00:05:25,493 --> 00:05:27,695 If they're brothers, why do they have different last names? 159 00:05:27,728 --> 00:05:29,997 If you read the script, you'd understand! 160 00:05:30,030 --> 00:05:32,500 Adult Adam: While I was warming to the novelty of having a job, 161 00:05:32,533 --> 00:05:34,668 Barry and Erica were warming to their jobs 162 00:05:34,702 --> 00:05:36,003 of selling novelties. 163 00:05:36,036 --> 00:05:37,738 And last but not least, 164 00:05:37,771 --> 00:05:42,142 we have our edible underpants in all flavors and sizes. 165 00:05:42,175 --> 00:05:43,511 Questions? I got one. 166 00:05:44,144 --> 00:05:45,312 This place is awesome. 167 00:05:45,345 --> 00:05:46,880 That's not a question, kiss-ass. 168 00:05:46,914 --> 00:05:48,382 That's all right. 169 00:05:48,416 --> 00:05:50,851 I share young Barry's verve for the gag game. 170 00:05:50,884 --> 00:05:53,754 Well, sir, I'm gonna learn everything about this place, 171 00:05:53,787 --> 00:05:55,656 starting with the exploding golf balls. 172 00:05:55,689 --> 00:05:57,725 Sorry. Barry offers enthusiasm, but not much else. 173 00:05:57,758 --> 00:05:59,326 Really? 'Cause on his application, 174 00:05:59,359 --> 00:06:00,728 he said he was a genius 175 00:06:00,761 --> 00:06:02,463 who was studying pre-brain-surgery. 176 00:06:04,064 --> 00:06:06,700 Yep. (Coughs) They explode, all right. 177 00:06:06,734 --> 00:06:08,168 Okay, here's what you need to know. 178 00:06:08,201 --> 00:06:11,271 Barry's gonna break stuff, scare customers, hurt himself. 179 00:06:11,304 --> 00:06:13,273 But he's my brother and I love the dope, 180 00:06:13,306 --> 00:06:15,443 so I'm offering to be a buffer. 181 00:06:15,476 --> 00:06:17,210 Thanks for the heads-up, Erica. 182 00:06:17,244 --> 00:06:19,680 How could you! What? 183 00:06:19,713 --> 00:06:22,282 I heard everything, thanks to this! 184 00:06:22,315 --> 00:06:24,485 You sold me out on the first day? 185 00:06:24,518 --> 00:06:26,420 I'm just protecting you from the biggest danger 186 00:06:26,454 --> 00:06:28,121 in your life... you. 187 00:06:28,155 --> 00:06:30,057 You really think you're better than me at everything? 188 00:06:30,090 --> 00:06:31,158 That I'm a joke? 189 00:06:31,191 --> 00:06:33,160 Barry, you're covered in exploding golf ball dust. 190 00:06:33,193 --> 00:06:34,695 Well, you're the joke. 191 00:06:34,728 --> 00:06:37,998 'Cause I'm not just gonna be the greatest brain doctor, 192 00:06:38,031 --> 00:06:41,334 I'm also gonna be the greatest Spencer's gifts employee. 193 00:06:41,368 --> 00:06:42,836 How, you ask? 194 00:06:42,870 --> 00:06:44,171 I'll out-Spencer gifts you. 195 00:06:44,204 --> 00:06:47,107 Now, I got to get myself a new shirt, 'cause this one's ruined. 196 00:06:47,140 --> 00:06:50,844 Adult Adam: And so began the great goldberg Spencer gift-off. 197 00:06:50,878 --> 00:06:54,014 Sold my first item. Suck it. 198 00:06:54,047 --> 00:06:56,650 Yep, my brother was convinced he would walk away the winner. 199 00:06:56,684 --> 00:06:58,552 Meanwhile, i needed a job myself, 200 00:06:58,586 --> 00:07:00,888 and it was gonna take a true miracle. 201 00:07:00,921 --> 00:07:02,189 Wait a minute. 202 00:07:02,222 --> 00:07:03,657 Help found! 203 00:07:03,691 --> 00:07:06,059 If I could pass the impossible interview. 204 00:07:06,093 --> 00:07:07,360 How many quarters are in a dollar? 205 00:07:07,394 --> 00:07:08,829 Four. 206 00:07:08,862 --> 00:07:10,598 I'll be in the back, taking a nap. 207 00:07:10,631 --> 00:07:13,333 Sweet. Oh. And we're running a promotion. 208 00:07:13,366 --> 00:07:15,368 Every "a" a kid has on his report card, 209 00:07:15,402 --> 00:07:16,637 he gets a quarter. 210 00:07:16,670 --> 00:07:17,938 Got it? Sir, yes, sir! 211 00:07:17,971 --> 00:07:19,106 Don't do that. 212 00:07:20,207 --> 00:07:22,643 Dad, today I became a man! 213 00:07:22,676 --> 00:07:24,377 Go brag to your friends and your grandpa. 214 00:07:24,411 --> 00:07:25,579 That's not a "me" thing. 215 00:07:25,613 --> 00:07:27,214 No, no! I got a job! 216 00:07:27,247 --> 00:07:28,549 A real one? 217 00:07:28,582 --> 00:07:29,983 Yep, at my favorite place in the world, 218 00:07:30,017 --> 00:07:31,451 the arcade. 219 00:07:31,485 --> 00:07:33,587 All my children have jobs? 220 00:07:33,621 --> 00:07:34,855 This is my dream. 221 00:07:34,888 --> 00:07:36,657 I close my eyes, and this is what I see. 222 00:07:36,690 --> 00:07:39,326 That's a sad dream, but you have a sad life, so I get it. 223 00:07:39,359 --> 00:07:41,094 Come here! 224 00:07:41,128 --> 00:07:42,863 What's happening? This is me hugging you. 225 00:07:42,896 --> 00:07:44,965 No! I'm hugging you! Just accept it! 226 00:07:44,998 --> 00:07:46,934 Mom! Dad's trying to hug me! 227 00:07:46,967 --> 00:07:49,537 Oh, Murray, you're finally expressing 228 00:07:49,570 --> 00:07:51,505 your love and affection towards your children! 229 00:07:51,539 --> 00:07:53,473 No, the little weird one got a job! 230 00:07:53,507 --> 00:07:55,208 What? Who would hire him? 231 00:07:55,242 --> 00:07:56,910 Don't know. Don't care. 232 00:07:56,944 --> 00:07:58,646 I thought he'd be singing in a wig for years. 233 00:07:58,679 --> 00:08:00,914 Me, too. Now, if you don't mind, 234 00:08:00,948 --> 00:08:02,349 I'm gonna go adjust my change belt. 235 00:08:02,382 --> 00:08:03,617 It was hanging a little low. 236 00:08:03,651 --> 00:08:05,352 (Clicks tongue) 237 00:08:05,385 --> 00:08:08,288 How could you let him accept a job and be part of the world? 238 00:08:08,321 --> 00:08:09,690 I didn't do anything. It was easy. 239 00:08:09,723 --> 00:08:12,492 It's fine. I'll just wait it out until he quits or gets fired. 240 00:08:12,526 --> 00:08:15,462 Or he'll learn responsibility and pride from a job well done. 241 00:08:15,495 --> 00:08:17,030 Oh, shut the (Bleep) Up, Murray. 242 00:08:17,064 --> 00:08:18,932 Adult Adam: As my parents debated my new job, 243 00:08:18,966 --> 00:08:21,434 Erica was settling into hers. 244 00:08:21,468 --> 00:08:22,770 Welcome to Spencer's. 245 00:08:22,803 --> 00:08:24,204 Shopping for anything in particular? 246 00:08:24,237 --> 00:08:26,273 We're looking for party favors for Billy's birthday. 247 00:08:26,306 --> 00:08:28,141 I'm turning this much! 248 00:08:28,175 --> 00:08:30,277 Okay... Whatever that is. 249 00:08:30,310 --> 00:08:31,979 Well, we have great stuff for kids. 250 00:08:32,012 --> 00:08:34,314 Balloons, fake tattoos, bouncy balls. 251 00:08:34,347 --> 00:08:36,516 Boring! (Chuckles) 252 00:08:36,550 --> 00:08:38,652 Let me guess, William, you like poo-poo? 253 00:08:39,352 --> 00:08:40,854 You like fake barf? 254 00:08:40,888 --> 00:08:43,390 You like big ol' farts? Yes! 255 00:08:43,423 --> 00:08:45,125 Then come with me, 'cause you're gonna have 256 00:08:45,158 --> 00:08:47,060 the best birthday farty ever! 257 00:08:47,094 --> 00:08:48,596 Yay! 258 00:08:48,629 --> 00:08:49,930 Barry: Let's go, little man. 259 00:08:49,963 --> 00:08:52,099 I know you were worried about your brother, 260 00:08:52,132 --> 00:08:53,901 but he's actually doing great. 261 00:08:53,934 --> 00:08:57,037 I'd say he's really embraced the spirit of Spencer's. 262 00:08:57,070 --> 00:08:58,972 Yeah, well, he's not the only one. 263 00:08:59,840 --> 00:09:01,274 Watch this. 264 00:09:01,308 --> 00:09:03,611 Hey, handsome. Welcome to Spencer's. 265 00:09:03,644 --> 00:09:04,945 Can I help you with anything? 266 00:09:04,978 --> 00:09:06,213 Nah, just kinda browsing. 267 00:09:06,246 --> 00:09:08,115 Dude! You like chicks? 268 00:09:08,148 --> 00:09:09,482 Um... yeah. 269 00:09:09,516 --> 00:09:10,784 I'm kind of talking to one. 270 00:09:10,818 --> 00:09:12,319 Yeah, he's kind of talking to one. 271 00:09:12,352 --> 00:09:15,823 What about chicks in bikinis sun tanning on rad sports cars? 272 00:09:15,856 --> 00:09:18,058 Isn't that better than this dud? Yeah, probably. 273 00:09:18,091 --> 00:09:19,392 Then step to your right 274 00:09:19,426 --> 00:09:21,528 and check out our sweet posters! 275 00:09:21,561 --> 00:09:22,730 Adult Adam: And for the first time, 276 00:09:22,763 --> 00:09:24,497 Barry was out-spencering Erica. 277 00:09:24,531 --> 00:09:26,667 My lord, look at that boy! 278 00:09:26,700 --> 00:09:30,237 Scooping up every super car and boobie poster we got. 279 00:09:30,270 --> 00:09:31,605 Just doing my job, sir. 280 00:09:31,639 --> 00:09:34,307 I know this is a small detour on your way to becoming 281 00:09:34,341 --> 00:09:37,210 a big-time brain surgeon, but how would you like 282 00:09:37,244 --> 00:09:39,379 to be assistant manager? Both: What? 283 00:09:39,412 --> 00:09:41,715 I've been looking for somebody to help me run this place. 284 00:09:41,749 --> 00:09:43,483 I found him. What do you say? 285 00:09:43,516 --> 00:09:45,185 I say you're gonna be out of business in two weeks. 286 00:09:45,218 --> 00:09:46,754 Thank you for this opportunity. 287 00:09:46,787 --> 00:09:49,189 Erica, your brilliant brother's in charge. 288 00:09:49,222 --> 00:09:52,292 Now, I'm gonna go lose myself in a cinnabon. 289 00:09:52,325 --> 00:09:53,927 Barry: Well, well, well. 290 00:09:53,961 --> 00:09:56,764 Looks like the master has become the student. 291 00:09:56,797 --> 00:09:57,865 That's not the expression. 292 00:09:57,898 --> 00:10:00,768 It is now, 'cause Barry's the boss. 293 00:10:00,801 --> 00:10:04,304 And the boss Barry says clean all the dribble glasses 294 00:10:04,337 --> 00:10:05,939 and restock the fake turds. 295 00:10:07,174 --> 00:10:09,542 Adult Adam: As Erica faced the wrath of a new boss, 296 00:10:09,576 --> 00:10:11,879 I was facing bossy customers. 297 00:10:11,912 --> 00:10:14,047 Hey, there. Nine quarters, please. 298 00:10:14,081 --> 00:10:15,883 What's this? It's my report card. 299 00:10:15,916 --> 00:10:17,350 I'm a straight-a student. 300 00:10:17,384 --> 00:10:18,652 But I go to school with you, 301 00:10:18,686 --> 00:10:19,820 and the report cards haven't come out yet. 302 00:10:19,853 --> 00:10:21,021 Then why am I holding one? 303 00:10:21,054 --> 00:10:22,422 That's from three years ago! 304 00:10:22,455 --> 00:10:24,825 Plus, those aren't a's. They're f's you turned into a's. 305 00:10:24,858 --> 00:10:26,960 Nuh-uh. Look. 306 00:10:26,994 --> 00:10:28,528 A's don't have right angles. 307 00:10:28,561 --> 00:10:31,131 You should know that 'cause you got an "a" in geometry. 308 00:10:31,164 --> 00:10:32,666 Well, here's something you should know. 309 00:10:32,700 --> 00:10:34,167 Give me a fistful of quarters 310 00:10:34,201 --> 00:10:35,903 before I give you a faceful of fist. 311 00:10:36,603 --> 00:10:37,671 (Clicking) 312 00:10:37,705 --> 00:10:39,973 Oh, yeah, she's got nine a's, too. 313 00:10:40,007 --> 00:10:41,041 What? No way! 314 00:10:41,074 --> 00:10:42,509 I've got my report card right here. 315 00:10:42,542 --> 00:10:44,511 That's a napkin! Less talking, more clicking. 316 00:10:45,245 --> 00:10:46,346 (Clicking) 317 00:10:46,379 --> 00:10:47,480 That's it. 318 00:10:47,514 --> 00:10:48,615 Look me in the eye as you do it. 319 00:10:49,817 --> 00:10:50,951 Don't you look away! 320 00:10:55,022 --> 00:10:56,423 Adult Adam: Still day one at my new job, 321 00:10:56,456 --> 00:10:59,459 and I was already feeling like it was "game over." 322 00:10:59,492 --> 00:11:00,828 Dude, where'd all these people come from? 323 00:11:00,861 --> 00:11:02,696 Everybody heard i was giving out free money! 324 00:11:02,730 --> 00:11:04,031 But that's not even a report card! 325 00:11:04,064 --> 00:11:05,265 That's a sbarro box! 326 00:11:05,298 --> 00:11:06,834 I know, Dave Kim! 327 00:11:06,867 --> 00:11:08,268 I've lost control. 328 00:11:08,301 --> 00:11:09,569 I'm gonna get fired. 329 00:11:09,602 --> 00:11:10,603 Oh, for sure. 330 00:11:11,438 --> 00:11:13,473 Ah, dang it! I'm all out! 331 00:11:13,506 --> 00:11:14,742 You're gonna need more quarters. 332 00:11:14,775 --> 00:11:17,677 Wait! I've got all the quarters in the world! 333 00:11:17,711 --> 00:11:19,146 I had the perfect plan. 334 00:11:19,179 --> 00:11:20,748 I would just borrow a couple quarters 335 00:11:20,781 --> 00:11:22,649 from the machine. Free quarters! 336 00:11:22,682 --> 00:11:24,484 Oh, god! Not part of the plan! 337 00:11:25,685 --> 00:11:27,320 What the hell is going on? 338 00:11:27,354 --> 00:11:29,089 It's a funny story, really. 339 00:11:29,122 --> 00:11:31,691 I gave out free money. (Laughs nervously) 340 00:11:31,725 --> 00:11:32,760 It's not funny. 341 00:11:36,730 --> 00:11:39,299 Okay. Those beer helmets are clean enough. 342 00:11:39,332 --> 00:11:41,735 Go tidy up the naughty novelty section in the back. 343 00:11:41,769 --> 00:11:43,837 Erica: No. There's creepos over there. 344 00:11:43,871 --> 00:11:45,605 And they're not buying anything. 345 00:11:45,638 --> 00:11:48,008 Erica, you're objecting to a direct order 346 00:11:48,041 --> 00:11:49,376 from your superior. 347 00:11:49,409 --> 00:11:51,211 Know what would happen if this was the army? 348 00:11:51,244 --> 00:11:53,480 Uh, this isn't the army. We sell butt mugs. 349 00:11:53,513 --> 00:11:54,815 Watch yourself. 350 00:11:54,848 --> 00:11:57,284 Oh, Leon, I'm gonna need the keys to the glass case. 351 00:11:57,317 --> 00:11:58,618 The glass case? 352 00:11:58,651 --> 00:12:01,088 With the pewter dragons holding the crystal balls? 353 00:12:01,121 --> 00:12:03,523 I haven't opened this case in years. 354 00:12:03,556 --> 00:12:06,359 Yeah, I saw this stupid goth kid in the mall, 355 00:12:06,393 --> 00:12:09,897 and I said to myself, "that kid'll buy a dragon." 356 00:12:09,930 --> 00:12:11,598 So I struck up a convo, and he's coming in. 357 00:12:11,631 --> 00:12:13,033 Oh, my god. 358 00:12:13,901 --> 00:12:15,602 Son, you've got it. 359 00:12:15,635 --> 00:12:16,669 The gift. 360 00:12:17,805 --> 00:12:19,306 The Spencer's gift. 361 00:12:19,339 --> 00:12:21,041 Come on. That's not a thing. 362 00:12:21,074 --> 00:12:23,010 (Sniffles) This is a big moment for me. 363 00:12:23,043 --> 00:12:26,646 (Laughing) I-I've never said this before. 364 00:12:26,679 --> 00:12:28,681 You can lock up tonight. You sure? 365 00:12:28,715 --> 00:12:31,218 I've never been more sure about anything in my life. 366 00:12:32,719 --> 00:12:33,821 You! 367 00:12:34,454 --> 00:12:35,889 Learn from him. 368 00:12:35,923 --> 00:12:37,424 He has the gift. 369 00:12:37,457 --> 00:12:39,059 Spencer's gift, sure. 370 00:12:39,092 --> 00:12:40,427 Barry: Well, would you look at that. 371 00:12:40,460 --> 00:12:42,062 First, I'm made the boss. 372 00:12:42,095 --> 00:12:44,097 Now I get the keys to the store. 373 00:12:44,131 --> 00:12:46,233 I don't even have the keys to the house. 374 00:12:46,266 --> 00:12:48,268 I have to sit in the tree until someone comes home! 375 00:12:48,301 --> 00:12:49,636 I have to hand it to you, 376 00:12:49,669 --> 00:12:51,304 you really did out-Spencer gifts me. 377 00:12:51,338 --> 00:12:54,007 Eh, don't feel bad. Not everyone has the gift. 378 00:12:54,041 --> 00:12:57,110 If anything, i feel bad you don't get to see Chuck Norris. 379 00:12:57,144 --> 00:12:59,246 Chuck Norris? What about him? 380 00:12:59,279 --> 00:13:01,081 Oh, he's signing his new book at b. Dalton. 381 00:13:01,114 --> 00:13:02,182 What's it called? 382 00:13:02,215 --> 00:13:03,350 Uh... 383 00:13:03,383 --> 00:13:04,885 "Punching America in the throat." 384 00:13:04,918 --> 00:13:06,119 Damn it! 385 00:13:06,153 --> 00:13:07,787 Why are the two most important things 386 00:13:07,821 --> 00:13:09,022 that ever happened to me tonight? 387 00:13:09,056 --> 00:13:10,824 I guess... I could cover for you. 388 00:13:11,424 --> 00:13:13,193 Thank you, Erica. 389 00:13:13,226 --> 00:13:14,661 You know, you're not a good employee, 390 00:13:14,694 --> 00:13:16,897 but you're an average sister. 391 00:13:16,930 --> 00:13:18,932 Adult Adam: Erica knew that in order to beat Barry, 392 00:13:18,966 --> 00:13:20,968 she'd have to play dirty. 393 00:13:21,001 --> 00:13:23,270 Meanwhile, I had to clean up the mess I made at work. 394 00:13:23,303 --> 00:13:24,404 It was terrible. 395 00:13:24,437 --> 00:13:26,139 They shook me down for all my quarters. 396 00:13:26,173 --> 00:13:28,208 Was one dressed like a ditzy redhead 397 00:13:28,241 --> 00:13:30,978 and the other like a smart-Alec shoeshiner? 398 00:13:31,011 --> 00:13:32,980 Albert, not everything is a grift. 399 00:13:33,013 --> 00:13:34,681 Face it, mom was right. 400 00:13:34,714 --> 00:13:36,383 I'm not qualified to do anything 401 00:13:36,416 --> 00:13:37,851 besides make stupid home movies. 402 00:13:37,885 --> 00:13:39,987 We can fix this, together. 403 00:13:40,020 --> 00:13:41,121 How much they get you for? 404 00:13:41,154 --> 00:13:42,222 $110. 405 00:13:42,255 --> 00:13:43,456 You're gonna fix this on your own. 406 00:13:43,490 --> 00:13:44,557 Fine. I'll think of something. 407 00:13:44,591 --> 00:13:46,026 Just don't tell mom i got fired. 408 00:13:46,059 --> 00:13:50,163 Yes! I heard everything, thanks to Barry's stupid giant ear. 409 00:13:50,197 --> 00:13:52,499 Our Hollywood dreams are back on the table. 410 00:13:52,532 --> 00:13:53,566 (Groans) (Chuckles) 411 00:13:53,600 --> 00:13:56,203 Mom, you got to stop. I just lost a real job. 412 00:13:56,236 --> 00:13:57,704 You know what else is real? 413 00:13:57,737 --> 00:13:59,806 You walking me down the red carpet 414 00:13:59,839 --> 00:14:01,041 at the academy awards. 415 00:14:01,074 --> 00:14:03,610 To be clear, if I ever get a job in show business, 416 00:14:03,643 --> 00:14:06,413 I am not taking you as my date to anything. 417 00:14:06,446 --> 00:14:08,415 Of course you are. (Scoffs) I'm super not. 418 00:14:08,448 --> 00:14:10,683 Well, who else are you gonna take? Um, my wife? 419 00:14:10,717 --> 00:14:12,285 Oh, it's cool. She'll understand. 420 00:14:12,319 --> 00:14:14,054 No, she won't. I'll talk to her. She'll get it. 421 00:14:14,087 --> 00:14:15,956 You stay away from her. Seriously. 422 00:14:15,989 --> 00:14:17,390 She didn't sign up for this. 423 00:14:17,424 --> 00:14:19,392 So, what, I'm the only one who believes in you, 424 00:14:19,426 --> 00:14:21,294 but I have to read about your successes 425 00:14:21,328 --> 00:14:24,131 in people magazine, like some poor slob at a dentist's office? 426 00:14:24,164 --> 00:14:26,333 I'll tell you before the article comes out, okay? 427 00:14:26,366 --> 00:14:29,269 If I pay back the arcade, can I go to the oscars then? 428 00:14:29,302 --> 00:14:31,804 You can ride with me and my wife in the limo, 429 00:14:31,838 --> 00:14:34,474 but you can't go in. I'll find a way. 430 00:14:34,507 --> 00:14:35,976 No! You're not bailing him out of this. 431 00:14:36,009 --> 00:14:38,411 This is his job, not yours. 432 00:14:38,445 --> 00:14:40,847 You got to find a way to solve it on your own. 433 00:14:40,880 --> 00:14:43,750 And I just did, by trading in my future happiness for cash. 434 00:14:43,783 --> 00:14:46,086 Here's your money, plus a little extra 435 00:14:46,119 --> 00:14:47,787 because you're a special boy. 436 00:14:47,820 --> 00:14:49,022 Hey, my special-boy money! 437 00:14:49,056 --> 00:14:50,390 I'm gonna be brutal here 438 00:14:50,423 --> 00:14:51,992 because your mom's in la-la land. 439 00:14:52,025 --> 00:14:54,694 You're not a boy, and you're not special! 440 00:14:54,727 --> 00:14:55,996 What are you saying? 441 00:14:56,029 --> 00:14:57,931 He's not some magic star. 442 00:14:57,965 --> 00:14:59,967 He's a regular Joe 443 00:15:00,000 --> 00:15:02,869 who's got to learn the value of a hard day's work. 444 00:15:02,902 --> 00:15:05,505 By wearing wigs and making home movies. 445 00:15:05,538 --> 00:15:07,540 Oh, my god! What are you doing to this kid? 446 00:15:07,574 --> 00:15:08,641 I'm being his mother. 447 00:15:08,675 --> 00:15:10,143 Well, I'm being his father. 448 00:15:10,177 --> 00:15:11,511 Welcome to reality. 449 00:15:11,544 --> 00:15:13,380 You go down to that job, 450 00:15:13,413 --> 00:15:15,382 and you solve it any way you can! 451 00:15:20,187 --> 00:15:21,354 Solve it! 452 00:15:22,922 --> 00:15:24,157 What a rip! 453 00:15:24,191 --> 00:15:25,592 Chuck Norris wasn't even there, 454 00:15:25,625 --> 00:15:27,594 just some lady named Maya angelou. 455 00:15:27,627 --> 00:15:29,196 She didn't know anything about karate. 456 00:15:29,229 --> 00:15:31,131 Barry. We need to talk. 457 00:15:32,299 --> 00:15:33,733 Leon. What are you doing back? 458 00:15:33,766 --> 00:15:36,036 Someone paged me to come back to the store. 459 00:15:36,069 --> 00:15:39,072 When I got here, you were gone... 460 00:15:39,106 --> 00:15:40,673 And so were all the bottled farts. 461 00:15:40,707 --> 00:15:42,442 Oh, no! Not the bottled farts! 462 00:15:42,475 --> 00:15:43,876 Yes, the bottled farts. 463 00:15:43,910 --> 00:15:46,513 When I saw all the bottled farts were gone, i was excited. 464 00:15:46,546 --> 00:15:48,448 I thought you sold the bottled farts. 465 00:15:48,481 --> 00:15:51,351 But now it seems you lost the bottled farts. 466 00:15:51,384 --> 00:15:52,986 I'd never lose the bottled farts. 467 00:15:53,020 --> 00:15:55,622 Barry, do you understand that each bottled fart 468 00:15:55,655 --> 00:15:58,491 was ass-crafted by a third-generation fartist 469 00:15:58,525 --> 00:15:59,959 in pueblo, Colorado? 470 00:15:59,993 --> 00:16:01,428 So they just fart into the bottles? 471 00:16:01,461 --> 00:16:04,297 Oh, it's so much more than that. 472 00:16:04,331 --> 00:16:09,169 Inside every bottled fart lives a child's wish. 473 00:16:09,202 --> 00:16:11,771 And now all those wishes have vanished, 474 00:16:11,804 --> 00:16:14,674 like... Something in the wind. 475 00:16:14,707 --> 00:16:15,808 A squeaky fart? 476 00:16:15,842 --> 00:16:16,976 Damn it. 477 00:16:17,010 --> 00:16:18,911 No one gets it like you, Barry. 478 00:16:20,180 --> 00:16:22,582 But I still need that name tag. 479 00:16:22,615 --> 00:16:25,885 Wait! You can't fire him for just losing some farts. 480 00:16:25,918 --> 00:16:27,887 It's not about the farts. 481 00:16:28,855 --> 00:16:30,490 It's about trust. 482 00:16:31,624 --> 00:16:33,593 You broke my heart, son. 483 00:16:35,095 --> 00:16:36,563 You did this. 484 00:16:36,596 --> 00:16:39,066 You couldn't deal with the fact that i was better than you, 485 00:16:39,099 --> 00:16:42,369 that I was good at something, that I'll be a doctor one day. 486 00:16:42,402 --> 00:16:44,104 Barry... No! Just don't talk to me. 487 00:16:48,608 --> 00:16:50,477 Adult Adam: My arcade job was a bust, 488 00:16:50,510 --> 00:16:52,679 but I had the perfect way to get my money back. 489 00:16:52,712 --> 00:16:54,914 Yo, ponytail! Give me my damn money! 490 00:16:54,947 --> 00:16:57,184 No. Okay, that didn't work. 491 00:16:57,217 --> 00:16:59,519 Please do the right thing and give me my money. 492 00:16:59,552 --> 00:17:02,021 I've considered your offer, and I have a counteroffer. 493 00:17:02,055 --> 00:17:03,223 Eat my butt. 494 00:17:03,256 --> 00:17:05,058 I totally thought you were gonna do the right thing, 495 00:17:05,092 --> 00:17:06,293 and then you offered your butt! 496 00:17:06,326 --> 00:17:09,028 Can you guys please just give me the money back? 497 00:17:09,062 --> 00:17:11,030 Sorry, man. I need that money to feed my family. 498 00:17:11,064 --> 00:17:13,200 Really? No. My dad's a lawyer. 499 00:17:13,233 --> 00:17:15,168 He has that commercial where he wears a neck brace 500 00:17:15,202 --> 00:17:17,137 and tells you his number is dos dos dos, dos dos dos, 501 00:17:17,170 --> 00:17:18,538 dos dos dos dos. 502 00:17:18,571 --> 00:17:20,973 Wait! That's it! I know how to fix this! 503 00:17:21,007 --> 00:17:22,709 Is it by you giving us more quarters? 504 00:17:22,742 --> 00:17:26,012 No, but what if I told you i could make you stars? 505 00:17:26,045 --> 00:17:28,548 Johnny's already a star. You're a star, Johnny. 506 00:17:28,581 --> 00:17:30,250 I know, girl. Everybody knows. 507 00:17:30,283 --> 00:17:31,318 So, you'll do it? 508 00:17:31,351 --> 00:17:33,553 Sure. But I got two questions for you. 509 00:17:33,586 --> 00:17:35,288 Can I play my sax? 510 00:17:35,322 --> 00:17:37,224 And how loud can I play my sax? 511 00:17:37,257 --> 00:17:38,391 (Music playing) 512 00:17:38,425 --> 00:17:39,726 Yeah! 513 00:17:39,759 --> 00:17:41,728 Do you like video games? 514 00:17:41,761 --> 00:17:43,330 Do you like girls? 515 00:17:43,363 --> 00:17:45,598 Do you like girls who like video games? 516 00:17:46,433 --> 00:17:47,734 Hey, big boy. 517 00:17:47,767 --> 00:17:49,636 How 'bout we make that two-player? 518 00:17:49,669 --> 00:17:51,338 Well, all right. 519 00:17:51,371 --> 00:17:54,040 Come on down to challenges arcade. 520 00:17:54,073 --> 00:17:58,111 All the latest games, from asteroids to zaxxon. 521 00:17:58,145 --> 00:17:59,679 Did somebody say "zaxxon"? 522 00:17:59,712 --> 00:18:01,714 More like sax-on. 523 00:18:01,748 --> 00:18:03,416 (Saxophone solo) 524 00:18:05,418 --> 00:18:08,054 Dude, this commercial's gonna be awesome. 525 00:18:08,087 --> 00:18:10,657 Commercial, huh? Not a bad idea. 526 00:18:10,690 --> 00:18:12,725 And it can be yours for only $5,000. 527 00:18:12,759 --> 00:18:15,828 How about no dollars and you can have your job back? 528 00:18:16,463 --> 00:18:17,564 Deal. 529 00:18:19,532 --> 00:18:21,067 Hey. 530 00:18:21,100 --> 00:18:22,435 Go away, fart thief. 531 00:18:22,469 --> 00:18:23,903 Well, maybe this will cheer you up. 532 00:18:25,205 --> 00:18:27,006 Huh? Whoopee cushion? 533 00:18:27,039 --> 00:18:28,208 Bug in an ice cube? 534 00:18:28,241 --> 00:18:30,343 Even though all those items are hilarious, 535 00:18:30,377 --> 00:18:31,811 you can't make up for what you did. 536 00:18:31,844 --> 00:18:33,112 (Sighs) 537 00:18:34,981 --> 00:18:36,649 Okay, fine. 538 00:18:36,683 --> 00:18:39,085 I paged Leon, and... 539 00:18:39,118 --> 00:18:42,021 I hid all of the stinky bottles in the stockroom. 540 00:18:43,390 --> 00:18:46,159 I did it because I was jealous. 541 00:18:46,193 --> 00:18:48,795 You're better at Spencer's gifts than me. 542 00:18:48,828 --> 00:18:49,962 And I'm sorry. 543 00:18:49,996 --> 00:18:51,464 I-i don't want another gag gift. 544 00:18:51,498 --> 00:18:52,865 No, it's a real one. 545 00:18:54,767 --> 00:18:57,437 (True colors playing) 546 00:18:57,470 --> 00:18:59,706 A stethoscope? For when you're a doctor. 547 00:19:00,607 --> 00:19:02,509 You don't believe that. 548 00:19:02,542 --> 00:19:04,677 Look, I know I'm always really hard on you, 549 00:19:04,711 --> 00:19:07,314 but watching you at that job made me see 550 00:19:07,347 --> 00:19:09,449 that when you're passionate about something, 551 00:19:10,016 --> 00:19:12,018 you can do anything. 552 00:19:12,051 --> 00:19:13,753 So you're gonna be a doctor, all right? 553 00:19:16,256 --> 00:19:17,724 And a damn good one. 554 00:19:18,958 --> 00:19:20,927 You may not be a good employee, 555 00:19:20,960 --> 00:19:22,329 but you're a great sister. 556 00:19:25,632 --> 00:19:27,900 Announcer: Challenges arcade, Willow grove park mall. 557 00:19:27,934 --> 00:19:29,669 Is this going on TV? 558 00:19:29,702 --> 00:19:31,271 My boss bought local air time, 559 00:19:31,304 --> 00:19:33,206 and now the manager of Spencer's gifts 560 00:19:33,240 --> 00:19:34,507 wants me to shoot one for him, too. 561 00:19:35,107 --> 00:19:37,009 Oh, my baby! 562 00:19:37,043 --> 00:19:39,045 Told you, Murray! He is special! 563 00:19:39,078 --> 00:19:42,215 That's his job, being amazing! 564 00:19:42,249 --> 00:19:44,884 You know, I think I'm gonna keep my actual job at the arcade. 565 00:19:44,917 --> 00:19:46,353 What? Truth is, without it, 566 00:19:46,386 --> 00:19:49,222 I never would have gotten my first real directing gig. 567 00:19:49,256 --> 00:19:51,591 Dad's right, a real job is a good thing. 568 00:19:51,624 --> 00:19:53,660 Well, you're still gonna take me to the oscars, though, right? 569 00:19:53,693 --> 00:19:55,027 I'm taking my wife. 570 00:19:55,061 --> 00:19:56,329 You'll take me to the emmys. 571 00:19:56,363 --> 00:19:57,730 Eh, I'm taking my wife. 572 00:19:57,764 --> 00:19:59,532 Sure you are. 573 00:20:00,032 --> 00:20:01,301 Bevy. 574 00:20:01,334 --> 00:20:02,535 Fine. I'll stop. 575 00:20:02,569 --> 00:20:05,572 You know, your mom may be onto something. 576 00:20:05,605 --> 00:20:09,276 You might be more special than I'm giving you credit for. 577 00:20:09,309 --> 00:20:10,377 You really think so? 578 00:20:10,410 --> 00:20:12,412 Don't get a big head about it. 579 00:20:12,445 --> 00:20:14,781 But, yeah, keep making your movies 580 00:20:14,814 --> 00:20:17,550 with the, uh, singing and the wigs. 581 00:20:17,584 --> 00:20:19,185 I thought you hate the wigs. 582 00:20:19,218 --> 00:20:21,321 Oh, I... I really hate the wigs. 583 00:20:23,490 --> 00:20:25,625 Adult Adam: Sometimes the people who push us the hardest 584 00:20:25,658 --> 00:20:27,294 are the most encouraging of all. 585 00:20:27,327 --> 00:20:28,628 Sure, growing up's messy, 586 00:20:28,661 --> 00:20:30,530 but when we accept the love around us, 587 00:20:30,563 --> 00:20:33,199 that's when our true colors shine brightest. 588 00:20:33,232 --> 00:20:37,504 * and I see your true colors shining through 589 00:20:38,771 --> 00:20:41,941 * I see your true colors 590 00:20:41,974 --> 00:20:44,644 * and that's why I love you 591 00:20:44,677 --> 00:20:49,649 * so don't be afraid to let them show * 592 00:20:51,851 --> 00:20:55,455 come on down to Spencer's gifts at the Willow grove mall, 593 00:20:55,488 --> 00:20:59,292 where our gag gifts are a sight for sore eyes. 594 00:20:59,326 --> 00:21:00,560 Spencer's! 595 00:21:00,593 --> 00:21:01,894 We've got fake barf! 596 00:21:01,928 --> 00:21:03,129 Underpants wallet! 597 00:21:03,162 --> 00:21:04,764 Real lava lamps! 598 00:21:04,797 --> 00:21:06,433 Whoopie cushions! (Air hisses) 599 00:21:06,466 --> 00:21:08,134 Joy buzzers! Ow. (Buzzing) 600 00:21:08,167 --> 00:21:09,669 "No fart zone" tape. 601 00:21:09,702 --> 00:21:11,704 Wind-up chattering teeth! (Chattering) 602 00:21:12,204 --> 00:21:13,706 Wacky shirts! 603 00:21:13,740 --> 00:21:14,774 Silly wigs! 604 00:21:14,807 --> 00:21:15,875 Edible underpants! 605 00:21:15,908 --> 00:21:18,311 And, of course, our best seller... 606 00:21:19,579 --> 00:21:21,180 Bottled farts! 607 00:21:21,213 --> 00:21:23,282 And for the woman in your life, 608 00:21:23,316 --> 00:21:26,353 we have lilac hand lotion, for some reason. (Chuckles) 609 00:21:26,386 --> 00:21:28,988 So, come on down to Spencer's. 610 00:21:29,021 --> 00:21:30,923 All: We've got shenanigans for you!