1 00:00:01,084 --> 00:00:03,462 Adult Adam: Back in the '80s, 2 00:00:03,462 --> 00:00:04,713 Country-Western music swept the nation, 3 00:00:04,713 --> 00:00:07,174 from Dolly Parton to Reba McEntire. 4 00:00:07,174 --> 00:00:08,634 The cowboy hats and line dancing 5 00:00:08,634 --> 00:00:10,135 even found their way to suburban Philly. 6 00:00:12,012 --> 00:00:14,932 JTP? What are you doing here? 7 00:00:14,932 --> 00:00:16,767 We came to see if Barry wanted to go to the campus pool 8 00:00:16,767 --> 00:00:18,268 and watch the ladies diving team. 9 00:00:18,268 --> 00:00:20,354 We're extremely lonely, and it's currently not illegal. 10 00:00:20,354 --> 00:00:22,064 Tell me if this is a good pick-up line -- 11 00:00:22,064 --> 00:00:23,857 "Nice splash, toots." It's not. 12 00:00:23,857 --> 00:00:26,652 Barry: I hear the JTP! I'm not coming down! 13 00:00:26,652 --> 00:00:28,278 You have to, honey! 14 00:00:28,278 --> 00:00:29,988 We kiss, so you do the things I want. 15 00:00:29,988 --> 00:00:31,865 [ Sighs ] Fine! 16 00:00:31,865 --> 00:00:33,659 But I don't want to hear so much as a peep from anyone! 17 00:00:36,161 --> 00:00:38,705 Tarnation! Holy cowboy. 18 00:00:38,705 --> 00:00:40,791 Very pale rider. Barry: Have at it! 19 00:00:40,791 --> 00:00:44,169 For your information, Joanne has been taking me line dancing, 20 00:00:44,169 --> 00:00:46,755 and since I'm loving and supportive, I have embraced it. 21 00:00:46,755 --> 00:00:48,465 Mm! Not as much as those jeans 22 00:00:48,465 --> 00:00:50,467 have embraced your buttocks and thighs. 23 00:00:50,467 --> 00:00:53,136 Yes, I do traditionally enjoy a loose trouser 24 00:00:53,136 --> 00:00:55,305 that accommodates my thunderous lower half, 25 00:00:55,305 --> 00:00:57,474 but these Lee jeans are surprisingly comfy. 26 00:00:57,474 --> 00:00:59,768 They hug nice. Jo Jo like. 27 00:00:59,768 --> 00:01:01,228 Is that a pearl-snap cowboy shirt? 28 00:01:01,228 --> 00:01:03,063 Good eye, Naked Rob. 29 00:01:03,063 --> 00:01:04,898 You can yank it right off like a Sixers warm-up jersey. 30 00:01:04,898 --> 00:01:06,817 I've done it. It starts the mood. 31 00:01:06,817 --> 00:01:08,986 And I see you've chosen a black hat? 32 00:01:08,986 --> 00:01:10,070 Does that make you the villain? 33 00:01:10,070 --> 00:01:12,364 Don't be absurd, Matt Bradley. 34 00:01:12,364 --> 00:01:14,908 Does your tie-dye shirt make you the chill, mellow, nice guy? 35 00:01:14,908 --> 00:01:16,868 It kinda does, yeah. 36 00:01:16,868 --> 00:01:18,287 Well, I just have one more question -- 37 00:01:18,287 --> 00:01:19,496 are there single women at this place? 38 00:01:19,496 --> 00:01:22,457 A ton, and they all dress in Daisy Dukes, 39 00:01:22,457 --> 00:01:24,668 crop tops, and pigtail braids. 40 00:01:24,668 --> 00:01:26,211 I wanna be a good ol' boy! Me, too! 41 00:01:26,211 --> 00:01:28,755 Yee-haw I think! Oh, wait! 42 00:01:28,755 --> 00:01:31,091 If you wanna join us, we have to teach you to dance. 43 00:01:32,759 --> 00:01:35,429 Toes on the line and follow my lead! 44 00:01:35,429 --> 00:01:37,723 ♪♪ 45 00:01:37,723 --> 00:01:40,392 Channel the pain of a hardscrabble prairie life -- 46 00:01:40,392 --> 00:01:43,353 Coaster Step into a Lasso Spin! 47 00:01:43,353 --> 00:01:46,189 Joanne: Oh, y'all are naturals! 48 00:01:46,189 --> 00:01:48,108 Doing things in a line is fun! 49 00:01:48,108 --> 00:01:50,027 Big finish! 50 00:01:50,027 --> 00:01:52,279 Rocking Chair into a Rattlesnake Shimmy! 51 00:01:53,572 --> 00:01:55,574 And Heel, Shuffle, Pose! 52 00:01:55,574 --> 00:01:57,159 Yee-haw! 53 00:01:57,159 --> 00:01:58,994 ♪ I'm twisted up inside ♪ 54 00:01:58,994 --> 00:02:02,289 ♪ But nonetheless, I feel the need to say ♪ 55 00:02:02,289 --> 00:02:04,916 -- Captions by VITAC -- 56 00:02:04,916 --> 00:02:06,335 ♪ I don't know the future ♪ 57 00:02:06,335 --> 00:02:09,504 ♪ But the past keeps getting clearer every day ♪ 58 00:02:09,504 --> 00:02:11,715 It was November 2, 1980-something, 59 00:02:11,715 --> 00:02:14,176 and after losing my job on the movie set, 60 00:02:14,176 --> 00:02:16,136 I had some time on my hands. 61 00:02:16,136 --> 00:02:17,012 Need help with the groceries? 62 00:02:17,012 --> 00:02:18,680 Thank you, Schmoo. 63 00:02:18,680 --> 00:02:21,099 Maybe too much time. 64 00:02:21,099 --> 00:02:24,311 Oh, no. That goes over here. 65 00:02:24,311 --> 00:02:27,230 Oh, that goes, uh, over here. 66 00:02:27,230 --> 00:02:31,777 Oh, my God. These go here. 67 00:02:31,777 --> 00:02:33,987 Oh, no. Honey. 68 00:02:33,987 --> 00:02:35,656 Oh, Jeebus. 69 00:02:37,282 --> 00:02:39,534 Yeah, Schmoo, Schmoo? 70 00:02:39,534 --> 00:02:41,119 Why don't you go play with your Nintendos? 71 00:02:41,119 --> 00:02:44,081 Blech. I've beaten every game. 72 00:02:44,081 --> 00:02:46,375 What's going on in your world, my grumpy gramps? 73 00:02:46,375 --> 00:02:47,709 Sorting buttons. 74 00:02:47,709 --> 00:02:49,169 Why? 75 00:02:49,169 --> 00:02:50,379 So they're in groups. 76 00:02:50,379 --> 00:02:51,963 Enough with the questions, Joe Friday. 77 00:02:54,091 --> 00:02:55,759 Ooh, a swirly one. 78 00:02:55,759 --> 00:02:56,927 Beginner's luck. 79 00:02:56,927 --> 00:02:58,512 Less talkin', more sortin'. 80 00:02:58,512 --> 00:03:01,056 So I started spending more time with the only person 81 00:03:01,056 --> 00:03:03,225 who had nowhere else to go. 82 00:03:03,225 --> 00:03:04,893 Just one time I'd like to see 83 00:03:04,893 --> 00:03:08,105 Judge Wapner sentence someone to death. 84 00:03:08,105 --> 00:03:09,898 Oh, this is much too... 85 00:03:09,898 --> 00:03:11,692 Creamy. ...creamy, yeah. 86 00:03:13,318 --> 00:03:16,279 Uh, another squirrel made it across. 87 00:03:16,279 --> 00:03:18,365 Yep, hanging with Pop-Pop wasn't super exciting, 88 00:03:18,365 --> 00:03:20,450 but it filled the days. 89 00:03:20,450 --> 00:03:21,993 Need help buckling her in? 90 00:03:21,993 --> 00:03:24,037 No, we're okay, but are you? 91 00:03:24,037 --> 00:03:25,497 Oh, yeah. 92 00:03:25,497 --> 00:03:28,041 After my nap, I'm gonna split a pear with Pop-Pop. 93 00:03:28,041 --> 00:03:30,544 Wow. Sounds pretty jam-packed. 94 00:03:30,544 --> 00:03:32,963 Tuesdays, am I right? 95 00:03:32,963 --> 00:03:34,714 It's Friday. Good talk. 96 00:03:34,714 --> 00:03:37,467 Uh, uh...see you around the mulberry tree. 97 00:03:39,678 --> 00:03:42,639 Oh, man, Adam's spending way too much time with Pop-Pop. 98 00:03:42,639 --> 00:03:44,224 Eh, we got our own kid to worry about. 99 00:03:44,224 --> 00:03:45,559 He's probably fine. 100 00:03:45,559 --> 00:03:46,977 But I wasn't. 101 00:03:46,977 --> 00:03:48,812 I really wasn't. 102 00:03:48,812 --> 00:03:50,647 Need help with Muriel? 103 00:03:50,647 --> 00:03:52,274 Nope? Cool. 104 00:03:52,274 --> 00:03:54,484 Dude, I wouldn't let you near our child right now. 105 00:03:54,484 --> 00:03:56,111 She poops herself and she's cleaner than you. 106 00:03:56,111 --> 00:03:57,988 [ Chuckles ] Roger that. 107 00:03:57,988 --> 00:04:00,157 Uh, Erica, what is going on with him? 108 00:04:00,157 --> 00:04:01,700 Remember when I dropped out of college 109 00:04:01,700 --> 00:04:03,785 and I sank into a slovenly self-hating abyss? 110 00:04:03,785 --> 00:04:05,662 Oh, no. That was such an unappealing time for you. 111 00:04:05,662 --> 00:04:07,414 Not my point. 112 00:04:07,414 --> 00:04:08,874 But, yes, we have to help him. Yeah. 113 00:04:08,874 --> 00:04:10,959 Hey, Adam, I say this with love -- 114 00:04:10,959 --> 00:04:12,669 you're pathetic and hard to look at. 115 00:04:12,669 --> 00:04:14,254 Smelling you is also no picnic. 116 00:04:14,254 --> 00:04:15,839 That's you? 117 00:04:15,839 --> 00:04:17,799 I thought your mom's been making hard-boiled eggs all week. 118 00:04:17,799 --> 00:04:19,551 I get it, I'm in a bit of a rut. 119 00:04:19,551 --> 00:04:20,719 But it'll pass. 120 00:04:20,719 --> 00:04:22,679 Adam, I've been where you are. 121 00:04:22,679 --> 00:04:25,182 When I stopped going to school, things got dark. Real dark. 122 00:04:25,182 --> 00:04:26,767 Like, "What am I doing with this person?" dark. 123 00:04:26,767 --> 00:04:28,435 Easy, now. 124 00:04:28,435 --> 00:04:30,312 But now she follows basic hygiene like the rest of us. 125 00:04:30,312 --> 00:04:32,481 You're doing it, baby! Guys, it's all good. 126 00:04:32,481 --> 00:04:34,566 I'm just gonna chill on the couch and watch "Gunsmoke" 127 00:04:34,566 --> 00:04:36,485 until I can finally go to NYU. 128 00:04:36,485 --> 00:04:39,362 It's not all good. You look and smell like hot ass. 129 00:04:39,362 --> 00:04:40,489 Find a new job. 130 00:04:40,489 --> 00:04:41,823 Hey! Lay off the kid. 131 00:04:41,823 --> 00:04:43,200 He's got Lyme disease. 132 00:04:43,200 --> 00:04:44,743 Adam doesn't have Lyme disease. 133 00:04:44,743 --> 00:04:46,495 I thought that's why he's being such a lazy slug. 134 00:04:46,495 --> 00:04:48,914 Some tick stole his life force, no? 135 00:04:48,914 --> 00:04:50,081 Fine, I'll look for a job. 136 00:04:50,081 --> 00:04:51,833 Yeah, I'll even help. 137 00:04:51,833 --> 00:04:53,126 Everywhere I turn, he's there. 138 00:04:53,126 --> 00:04:55,003 And his button sorting is [bleep] 139 00:04:55,003 --> 00:04:57,756 My life didn't give me much to brag about. 140 00:04:57,756 --> 00:05:01,927 But as a new grandmother, my mom was as boastful as ever. 141 00:05:01,927 --> 00:05:04,763 Oh, my signature client. 142 00:05:04,763 --> 00:05:06,515 What are we doing today? 143 00:05:06,515 --> 00:05:09,059 How about nothing because you're perfect? 144 00:05:09,059 --> 00:05:11,478 [ Chuckles ] Oh, Frank, stop. 145 00:05:11,478 --> 00:05:13,939 Why hasn't some gal scooped you up yet? 146 00:05:13,939 --> 00:05:15,357 That's a mystery to my mother, too. 147 00:05:15,357 --> 00:05:16,858 Have I shown you the most recent 148 00:05:16,858 --> 00:05:18,276 200 photos of my granddaughter? 149 00:05:18,276 --> 00:05:20,987 Ginzy, can you pick up the end? 150 00:05:20,987 --> 00:05:22,447 Yeah! Always happy to help. 151 00:05:22,447 --> 00:05:25,283 Maybe, um, go down a little bit. Okay. 152 00:05:25,283 --> 00:05:27,244 Really stretch it taut so he can get a bird's-eye view. 153 00:05:27,244 --> 00:05:30,163 Frank, I, too, am Muriel's grandmother. 154 00:05:30,163 --> 00:05:32,290 Linda, please, this is my time. 155 00:05:32,290 --> 00:05:33,792 Prepare yourself, Frank. 156 00:05:33,792 --> 00:05:35,919 You're gonna love these more than that Elton John concert 157 00:05:35,919 --> 00:05:37,295 you wouldn't shut up about. 158 00:05:37,295 --> 00:05:39,923 [ All chuckle ] Beverly Goldberg. 159 00:05:39,923 --> 00:05:43,593 But who's guarding the bridge if the troll is here? 160 00:05:43,593 --> 00:05:46,805 Jane Bales. That's quite an outfit. 161 00:05:46,805 --> 00:05:48,974 Is your horse hitched outside? 162 00:05:48,974 --> 00:05:52,227 Or are you the horse and Jane is hitched outside? 163 00:05:52,227 --> 00:05:54,062 It's all so confusing because you both have, 164 00:05:54,062 --> 00:05:55,981 wait for it... 165 00:05:55,981 --> 00:05:59,192 horse faces. [ Neighs ] 166 00:05:59,192 --> 00:06:01,778 Tedious and clumsy, just like you. 167 00:06:01,778 --> 00:06:03,613 We're going line dancing. 168 00:06:03,613 --> 00:06:06,241 Not something you'd be familiar with, Grandma. 169 00:06:06,241 --> 00:06:08,743 Oh, so you heard the incredible news 170 00:06:08,743 --> 00:06:11,997 that I created someone who created someone? 171 00:06:11,997 --> 00:06:14,875 I was referring to your gray, desiccated, listless hair. 172 00:06:14,875 --> 00:06:17,460 [ Scoffs ] I can't see any gray. 173 00:06:17,460 --> 00:06:19,504 It's blurry. 174 00:06:19,504 --> 00:06:21,339 You really should pick up those bifocals 175 00:06:21,339 --> 00:06:23,508 that Lou ordered [clears throat] 176 00:06:23,508 --> 00:06:25,385 is something that I should've said privately. 177 00:06:25,385 --> 00:06:26,887 Don't worry. 178 00:06:26,887 --> 00:06:29,514 This old crone can't hear you unless you shout. 179 00:06:29,514 --> 00:06:32,225 So, will I see you all tonight at Rhinestones and Roses? 180 00:06:32,225 --> 00:06:34,144 Hold up! 181 00:06:34,144 --> 00:06:35,812 You guys go line dancing together? 182 00:06:35,812 --> 00:06:36,938 Well, we invited you. 183 00:06:36,938 --> 00:06:38,398 But you said you were, 184 00:06:38,398 --> 00:06:41,151 you know, too tired from being a grandma. 185 00:06:41,151 --> 00:06:42,986 I said that? 186 00:06:42,986 --> 00:06:45,363 Your exact words were, "I'm tired. 187 00:06:45,363 --> 00:06:47,741 Being a grandma makes me tired. I'm a tired grandma." 188 00:06:47,741 --> 00:06:50,660 Well, when you put as much effort into it as I do, 189 00:06:50,660 --> 00:06:53,955 it can be tiring because I am not just a good grandma -- 190 00:06:53,955 --> 00:06:55,332 Oh, God, please say it. 191 00:06:55,332 --> 00:06:57,584 I am a great grandma. [ Gasps ] 192 00:06:57,584 --> 00:06:59,919 There it is. 193 00:06:59,919 --> 00:07:04,549 Yes, you are a great, great grandma. 194 00:07:04,549 --> 00:07:06,843 Damn it! So much unfortunate word play. 195 00:07:06,843 --> 00:07:09,179 This has honestly been too perfect. 196 00:07:09,179 --> 00:07:11,014 So, good luck with your grays, Granny. 197 00:07:11,014 --> 00:07:12,557 I'm gonna get out of Frank's way 198 00:07:12,557 --> 00:07:15,435 because God knows he's got his work cut out for him. 199 00:07:15,435 --> 00:07:17,354 [ Chuckles ] Bye! 200 00:07:17,354 --> 00:07:19,939 Well, thanks for getting my back, Essie! 201 00:07:19,939 --> 00:07:21,983 I don't know. I thought it went fine. 202 00:07:21,983 --> 00:07:23,818 Oh, really? Is this fine? 203 00:07:23,818 --> 00:07:25,779 [ Gasps ] Why?! 204 00:07:25,779 --> 00:07:28,198 Linda was closer! 205 00:07:28,198 --> 00:07:29,532 Frank will fix it when he's done with me. 206 00:07:29,532 --> 00:07:31,910 Get those fingers flying, Frank. 207 00:07:31,910 --> 00:07:34,454 Jane Bales had rattled my mom. 208 00:07:34,454 --> 00:07:37,666 Meanwhile, I was reeling from the lack of job opportunities. 209 00:07:37,666 --> 00:07:39,417 Okay, I found the perfect job for you -- 210 00:07:39,417 --> 00:07:40,794 mortician's assistant. 211 00:07:40,794 --> 00:07:42,212 Magician's assistant? 212 00:07:42,212 --> 00:07:44,923 Saw me in half and pull a rabbit outta my butt, I'm in! 213 00:07:44,923 --> 00:07:46,675 Mortician. Their only trick 214 00:07:46,675 --> 00:07:48,843 is to pickle dead people so they don't rot too fast. 215 00:07:48,843 --> 00:07:50,929 Considering I threw up when I saw 216 00:07:50,929 --> 00:07:53,473 whatever's going on with your heel, I'm gonna pass. 217 00:07:53,473 --> 00:07:56,226 Oh, my. Didn't realize I was splitting an egg cream with the Prince of Persia. 218 00:07:56,226 --> 00:07:59,145 Happy birthday, Mr. Presidents. 219 00:07:59,145 --> 00:08:01,815 I'm sex symbol Marilyn someone. 220 00:08:01,815 --> 00:08:03,608 Uh, what'll it be? 221 00:08:03,608 --> 00:08:05,068 What the hell is this place? 222 00:08:05,068 --> 00:08:06,611 It's a '50s diner, gramps. 223 00:08:06,611 --> 00:08:08,571 People are suckers for nostalgia. 224 00:08:08,571 --> 00:08:10,824 '50s, feh. Why did TV need color? 225 00:08:10,824 --> 00:08:13,410 Carla, I'll handle this table. 226 00:08:13,410 --> 00:08:16,037 Blue suede shoes. [ Grunts ] 227 00:08:16,037 --> 00:08:17,330 Can I take your order? 228 00:08:17,330 --> 00:08:19,666 Johnny, it's Adam. You know me. 229 00:08:19,666 --> 00:08:20,959 Oh, hey, Goldnerd. 230 00:08:20,959 --> 00:08:23,044 Welcome to the old times. What can I get you? 231 00:08:23,044 --> 00:08:23,878 How about another waiter? 232 00:08:23,878 --> 00:08:25,338 Yeah, I get that a lot. 233 00:08:25,338 --> 00:08:26,548 Normally, I just manage the place, 234 00:08:26,548 --> 00:08:27,465 but we're short-staffed. 235 00:08:27,465 --> 00:08:29,008 Ha! Short-staffed. 236 00:08:29,008 --> 00:08:30,802 I'm in a position of authority. 237 00:08:30,802 --> 00:08:32,470 Oh, man, this is actually perfect. 238 00:08:32,470 --> 00:08:33,930 I'm looking for a job. 239 00:08:33,930 --> 00:08:35,223 You got any experience waiting tables? 240 00:08:35,223 --> 00:08:37,559 No, but I have tons of experience 241 00:08:37,559 --> 00:08:38,810 eating at tables. 242 00:08:38,810 --> 00:08:40,103 That's not nothin'. 243 00:08:40,103 --> 00:08:41,563 Follow-up question -- Are you now, 244 00:08:41,563 --> 00:08:43,898 or have you ever been, a member of the Communist Party? 245 00:08:43,898 --> 00:08:45,316 I don't think so. 246 00:08:45,316 --> 00:08:47,652 You're hired. That's it? 247 00:08:47,652 --> 00:08:49,154 The kid's spilled three times, 248 00:08:49,154 --> 00:08:50,071 and we haven't ordered a thing yet. 249 00:08:50,071 --> 00:08:51,740 The bar is real low here. 250 00:08:51,740 --> 00:08:53,950 Nice. I did it. 251 00:08:53,950 --> 00:08:55,744 So I was gonna be a waiter. 252 00:08:55,744 --> 00:08:57,871 Meanwhile, my mom wasn't gonna have to wait much longer 253 00:08:57,871 --> 00:09:01,041 to prove to Jane Bales that she was still young. 254 00:09:01,041 --> 00:09:04,085 Wait, don't tell me you boys are into line dancing, too. 255 00:09:04,085 --> 00:09:06,629 It's awesome and sweaty and fun! 256 00:09:06,629 --> 00:09:08,214 It's like sports, but there's girls. 257 00:09:08,214 --> 00:09:09,382 Girls play sports. 258 00:09:09,382 --> 00:09:10,717 You've oversimplified my new passion. 259 00:09:10,717 --> 00:09:13,136 I'm partial to jazz and tap, but it fills a void. 260 00:09:13,136 --> 00:09:15,138 Wait, am I the only person in Jenkintown 261 00:09:15,138 --> 00:09:17,348 who hasn't tried this? Yes, ma'am. 262 00:09:17,348 --> 00:09:20,060 In fact, I was thinking, we should all have cowboy names. 263 00:09:20,060 --> 00:09:21,352 And then at the honky-tonk, 264 00:09:21,352 --> 00:09:22,687 that's what we use to talk to each other. 265 00:09:22,687 --> 00:09:24,189 That's perfect. 266 00:09:24,189 --> 00:09:27,067 Great! Okay. 'Cause I already got my name -- Bronco. 267 00:09:27,067 --> 00:09:28,693 I'll be Bronco. Wait, what? 268 00:09:28,693 --> 00:09:30,820 I'm feeling like a Tex. It's my very first thought, 269 00:09:30,820 --> 00:09:32,363 but I also don't care, 'cause I freakin' love it. 270 00:09:32,363 --> 00:09:34,407 You got it, Tex. Thank you kindly, Bronco. 271 00:09:34,407 --> 00:09:36,868 Wait, that's my name. What about Colt for me? 272 00:09:36,868 --> 00:09:38,244 It's settled. You're Colt, 273 00:09:38,244 --> 00:09:40,205 Naked Rob is Tex, Barry is Bronco, 274 00:09:40,205 --> 00:09:41,623 and Andy is Half-Pint. Half-Pint? 275 00:09:41,623 --> 00:09:43,583 What does that have to do with anything country? 276 00:09:43,583 --> 00:09:47,337 Oh, and I'll be Miss Lula Blaze from Tombstone Gulch. 277 00:09:47,337 --> 00:09:49,089 You're joining us for some boot-scootin', Mrs. G? 278 00:09:49,089 --> 00:09:50,090 If it's what the young people are doing, 279 00:09:50,090 --> 00:09:51,508 it's what I'm doing, too. 280 00:09:51,508 --> 00:09:53,009 Let's rock! Okay. 281 00:09:53,009 --> 00:09:56,346 ♪ Hey, ho, here we go, let's ride... ♪ 282 00:09:56,346 --> 00:09:58,932 Beverly, so great to see you here! 283 00:09:58,932 --> 00:10:00,058 And that "Cowgirl" sweater 284 00:10:00,058 --> 00:10:00,809 is adorable. 285 00:10:00,809 --> 00:10:02,060 And accurate, 286 00:10:02,060 --> 00:10:04,020 because "girl" is what I am. 287 00:10:04,020 --> 00:10:05,647 Other words that might go here are 288 00:10:05,647 --> 00:10:08,149 "agile," "energetic," "robust," 289 00:10:08,149 --> 00:10:10,235 and, of course, "proud American." 290 00:10:10,235 --> 00:10:12,278 Oh, that seems like 291 00:10:12,278 --> 00:10:14,405 that would require a lot of rhinestones. 292 00:10:14,405 --> 00:10:16,908 Hi, Barry. I'm not Barry, I'm Bronco. 293 00:10:16,908 --> 00:10:18,493 Colt. Tex. 294 00:10:18,493 --> 00:10:20,036 Andy's fine. 295 00:10:20,036 --> 00:10:23,998 Okay, cowboys and cowgirls, time to hit the dance floor! 296 00:10:27,210 --> 00:10:29,212 Mom, you sure you wanna do this? 297 00:10:29,212 --> 00:10:30,004 It's harder than it looks. 298 00:10:30,004 --> 00:10:31,214 Please, Barry. 299 00:10:31,214 --> 00:10:33,216 Disco, salsa, break, belly -- 300 00:10:33,216 --> 00:10:34,968 there isn't a dance I haven't mastered. 301 00:10:34,968 --> 00:10:36,386 [ Grunts ] Let's go. 302 00:10:36,386 --> 00:10:39,472 Beverly, you're here. 303 00:10:39,472 --> 00:10:42,142 Did one of these fine men throw a rope around you 304 00:10:42,142 --> 00:10:44,018 and try to take you to auction? 305 00:10:44,018 --> 00:10:45,311 If that's not clear, I'm suggesting -- 306 00:10:45,311 --> 00:10:46,729 It's clear. 307 00:10:46,729 --> 00:10:49,691 I love your 10-gallon hat and your 20-gallon skirt. 308 00:10:49,691 --> 00:10:51,776 If that wasn't clear -- It's clear! 309 00:10:51,776 --> 00:10:54,195 Now let's get to steppin'! 310 00:10:54,195 --> 00:10:56,072 [ Cheering ] Yee-haw! 311 00:10:56,072 --> 00:10:57,949 Man: Two, three, four! 312 00:10:57,949 --> 00:11:00,535 And step my mom did. Oh. 313 00:11:00,535 --> 00:11:01,953 She stepped on Essie. Ow! Ow! 314 00:11:01,953 --> 00:11:04,164 Essie! Watch your big feet. 315 00:11:04,164 --> 00:11:06,124 Sorry! They're just a little big. 316 00:11:06,124 --> 00:11:07,667 She stepped on Linda. Oh! 317 00:11:07,667 --> 00:11:09,252 It's okay, it happens all the time. 318 00:11:09,252 --> 00:11:10,670 Stay in your space. 319 00:11:10,670 --> 00:11:12,714 And finally, she stepped on herself. 320 00:11:12,714 --> 00:11:14,924 Whoa! Oh! Ow! Ow! 321 00:11:14,924 --> 00:11:16,676 Ooh, we have a nag down in the barn. 322 00:11:16,676 --> 00:11:19,846 Mom! A nag is down in the barn. 323 00:11:19,846 --> 00:11:22,724 I'm being folksy, but I think that woman is really hurt. 324 00:11:22,724 --> 00:11:25,101 Ooh, my gorgeous ankle! 325 00:11:26,811 --> 00:11:30,481 And just like that, my mom's attempt to rise above 326 00:11:30,481 --> 00:11:33,735 Jane Bale's insults led to her falling on the dance floor 327 00:11:33,735 --> 00:11:35,111 and feeling lower than ever. 328 00:11:37,322 --> 00:11:40,158 After my mom's spill on the dance floor, 329 00:11:40,158 --> 00:11:42,160 she was determined to get herself back on track. 330 00:11:42,160 --> 00:11:44,329 But there were some obstacles. 331 00:11:44,329 --> 00:11:46,247 Good news, it's just a sprain. 332 00:11:46,247 --> 00:11:49,334 But you will need some help walking. 333 00:11:49,334 --> 00:11:52,462 And her new bifocals were just so-so. [ Sighs ] 334 00:11:52,462 --> 00:11:54,589 Are you sure these make me seem younger? 335 00:11:54,589 --> 00:11:56,090 Absolutely. 336 00:11:56,090 --> 00:11:58,051 You look like all my aunts I had crushes on. 337 00:11:58,051 --> 00:11:59,594 But they're stylish, right? 338 00:11:59,594 --> 00:12:01,804 Beverly, when it comes to eyewear, 339 00:12:01,804 --> 00:12:03,973 no one knows hip like King Louie. 340 00:12:03,973 --> 00:12:05,516 King Louie? 341 00:12:05,516 --> 00:12:08,228 Would I refer to myself in such regal terms 342 00:12:08,228 --> 00:12:10,980 if I wasn't completely confident? 343 00:12:10,980 --> 00:12:14,317 And, unfortunately, there was a hiccup at the hair salon. 344 00:12:14,317 --> 00:12:16,736 Goodbye, gray. Hello, platinum blonde! 345 00:12:16,736 --> 00:12:18,863 Uh-oh. 346 00:12:18,863 --> 00:12:21,574 [ Gasps ] What the [bleep] Frank?! 347 00:12:21,574 --> 00:12:24,577 [ Door bell jingles ] Things couldn't get any worse for my mom... 348 00:12:24,577 --> 00:12:26,496 until the absolute worst walked in. 349 00:12:26,496 --> 00:12:27,956 [ Sighs ] Perfect. 350 00:12:27,956 --> 00:12:29,999 Beverly, nice to see you. 351 00:12:29,999 --> 00:12:31,918 Why aren't you hurling insults at me? 352 00:12:31,918 --> 00:12:33,253 I look like the "Where's the beef?" lady 353 00:12:33,253 --> 00:12:34,629 from the Wendy's commercial. 354 00:12:34,629 --> 00:12:37,048 Don't be silly. 355 00:12:37,048 --> 00:12:38,925 Are you pitying me? 356 00:12:38,925 --> 00:12:40,927 [ Scoffs ] Nonsense. 357 00:12:40,927 --> 00:12:42,553 Just, um, taking a little break 358 00:12:42,553 --> 00:12:44,138 from our usual sparring. 359 00:12:44,138 --> 00:12:45,348 Look me in the eye, Jane. 360 00:12:45,348 --> 00:12:46,391 I'd rather not. 361 00:12:46,391 --> 00:12:48,851 Jane, look me in the eye and insult me! 362 00:12:48,851 --> 00:12:50,186 Beverly, don't make me. 363 00:12:50,186 --> 00:12:51,854 "Where's the beef?" Please don't say that. 364 00:12:51,854 --> 00:12:53,773 "Where's the beef?" Beverly, stop it! 365 00:12:53,773 --> 00:12:54,899 "Where's the beef?" 366 00:12:54,899 --> 00:12:56,025 That's enough! Okay? 367 00:12:56,025 --> 00:12:58,778 You just -- God, you look so old. 368 00:12:58,778 --> 00:13:00,280 And it is so sad. 369 00:13:00,280 --> 00:13:02,156 And I just feel awful for everything I've ever said to you. 370 00:13:04,742 --> 00:13:06,411 As my mom was hitting a new low... 371 00:13:06,411 --> 00:13:08,871 How far have I fallen? 372 00:13:08,871 --> 00:13:12,000 ...I was hitting the bongos in my new role as a beatnik. 373 00:13:12,000 --> 00:13:14,335 Specials. 374 00:13:14,335 --> 00:13:17,380 Carrot soup...tuna... 375 00:13:17,380 --> 00:13:19,007 and truth. 376 00:13:19,007 --> 00:13:21,551 Here's some truth -- the tuna was also yesterday's special. 377 00:13:21,551 --> 00:13:22,885 Read into that what you will. 378 00:13:22,885 --> 00:13:25,138 ♪♪ 379 00:13:25,138 --> 00:13:27,223 [ Indistinct chatter on television ] 380 00:13:27,223 --> 00:13:30,310 Hey, there he is. Yo, daddy-o, how's it cookin'? 381 00:13:30,310 --> 00:13:31,978 You're not at work. Don't talk like that. 382 00:13:31,978 --> 00:13:33,438 Dig it. Where you going? 383 00:13:33,438 --> 00:13:34,647 "Wheel" is on. 384 00:13:34,647 --> 00:13:37,692 Can't. I gotta bone up on my diner lingo. 385 00:13:37,692 --> 00:13:40,236 Did you know "Adam and Eve on a raft" is toast and eggs? 386 00:13:40,236 --> 00:13:42,655 So folksy and unnecessary. 387 00:13:42,655 --> 00:13:45,033 Eh, not sure about this job. 388 00:13:45,033 --> 00:13:47,368 What are you talking about? This is great for him. 389 00:13:47,368 --> 00:13:49,412 Yeah, he pulled himself out of his rut so fast. 390 00:13:49,412 --> 00:13:51,205 Erica went ungroomed for months. 391 00:13:51,205 --> 00:13:52,915 We covered that part of my past, Geoff. 392 00:13:52,915 --> 00:13:55,043 I had to buy a horse-mane brush from the feed shop. 393 00:13:55,043 --> 00:13:57,628 Yep, peaks and valleys. We all got 'em. 394 00:13:57,628 --> 00:13:59,547 Once, I saw her make a Cheetos sandwich. 395 00:13:59,547 --> 00:14:01,632 Before she took a bite she told it, it was her best friend. 396 00:14:01,632 --> 00:14:03,259 That cheesy, crunchy sandwich 397 00:14:03,259 --> 00:14:04,635 is definitely topping you right now. 398 00:14:04,635 --> 00:14:06,804 First Adam's a beatnik, next thing you know, 399 00:14:06,804 --> 00:14:09,223 he's shooting dice with Lenny Bruce and the Black Panthers. 400 00:14:09,223 --> 00:14:11,642 That seems like a logical next step after a diner job, 401 00:14:11,642 --> 00:14:13,311 but the kid has a purpose again. 402 00:14:13,311 --> 00:14:15,396 If you're worried about him, just go down to the diner. 403 00:14:15,396 --> 00:14:16,981 You'll feel better seeing Adam working hard. 404 00:14:16,981 --> 00:14:18,483 Yeah, maybe you're right. 405 00:14:18,483 --> 00:14:20,693 Also, all this sad sandwich and horse-brush talk 406 00:14:20,693 --> 00:14:22,487 makes me want to take a break from you two for a while. 407 00:14:22,487 --> 00:14:25,198 While Pop-Pop was missing me at home, 408 00:14:25,198 --> 00:14:27,283 my mom was missing her youth. 409 00:14:27,283 --> 00:14:30,161 "There was an old woman who lived in a shoe." 410 00:14:30,161 --> 00:14:32,330 And she was probably younger than me. 411 00:14:32,330 --> 00:14:33,372 [ Babbles ] 412 00:14:33,372 --> 00:14:34,749 I mean, look at her, so vibrant, 413 00:14:34,749 --> 00:14:36,918 living the dream in her downtown shoe. 414 00:14:36,918 --> 00:14:38,669 That's not how that goes. 415 00:14:38,669 --> 00:14:41,047 How it goes is downhill from here. 416 00:14:41,047 --> 00:14:42,632 Watch Muriel for a sec. 417 00:14:42,632 --> 00:14:44,133 I gotta get her pacifier. 418 00:14:44,133 --> 00:14:45,384 Why are you carrying your purse? 419 00:14:45,384 --> 00:14:47,678 Because that's what old ladies do. 420 00:14:47,678 --> 00:14:51,140 We clutch our purses filled with Geritol tablets, 421 00:14:51,140 --> 00:14:53,851 frayed bingo cards, and memories of what was. 422 00:14:53,851 --> 00:14:54,769 Alright, Mom, this is ridiculous. 423 00:14:54,769 --> 00:14:56,145 Just put this down. 424 00:14:56,145 --> 00:14:57,396 Get off me, you whippersnapper. 425 00:14:57,396 --> 00:14:58,606 Whippersnapper? 426 00:14:58,606 --> 00:15:00,983 That's right. That's a word I use now. 427 00:15:00,983 --> 00:15:02,652 That's enough! 428 00:15:02,652 --> 00:15:05,238 You are not that old, and you know it. 429 00:15:05,238 --> 00:15:07,365 And the doctor said your ankle's back to normal, 430 00:15:07,365 --> 00:15:08,991 so you can stop with the cane. 431 00:15:08,991 --> 00:15:09,867 Okay, well, it doesn't matter. 432 00:15:09,867 --> 00:15:11,369 I feel old. 433 00:15:11,369 --> 00:15:14,122 I'm a grandma, a widow. 434 00:15:14,122 --> 00:15:16,207 It's obvious my best days are behind me. 435 00:15:16,207 --> 00:15:18,334 Oh, stop it. 436 00:15:18,334 --> 00:15:20,253 You're the most energetic, relentless, 437 00:15:20,253 --> 00:15:21,838 and intrusive person I've ever known. 438 00:15:21,838 --> 00:15:24,173 Oh, Barry. 439 00:15:24,173 --> 00:15:27,552 How is it you always know the exact right thing to say? 440 00:15:27,552 --> 00:15:28,719 What do you say? 441 00:15:28,719 --> 00:15:30,304 We practice a little more 442 00:15:30,304 --> 00:15:32,056 and hit Rhinestones and Roses tonight? 443 00:15:32,056 --> 00:15:34,433 I say yee-haw! 444 00:15:34,433 --> 00:15:37,478 Thanks to Barry, my mom was on a roll, 445 00:15:37,478 --> 00:15:40,106 and I was serving one to an unexpected customer. 446 00:15:40,106 --> 00:15:41,440 Hey, Pop-Pop! 447 00:15:41,440 --> 00:15:43,234 This roll is stale. 448 00:15:43,234 --> 00:15:46,362 An unexpected and difficult customer. 449 00:15:46,362 --> 00:15:47,989 New one coming up. Good to see you. 450 00:15:47,989 --> 00:15:50,908 And coffee. You got it. 451 00:15:50,908 --> 00:15:52,493 I don't want what's been sitting around. 452 00:15:52,493 --> 00:15:53,911 Fresh pot. 453 00:15:53,911 --> 00:15:55,496 Snap, snap, snap. 454 00:15:55,496 --> 00:15:59,208 An unexpected, difficult, and rude customer. 455 00:15:59,208 --> 00:16:00,543 And things got worse from there. 456 00:16:00,543 --> 00:16:02,253 That was too close to Marlon Brando. 457 00:16:02,253 --> 00:16:04,839 He changed tables. 458 00:16:04,839 --> 00:16:05,882 Tomatoes are too wet. 459 00:16:05,882 --> 00:16:07,300 He sent back food. 460 00:16:07,300 --> 00:16:09,135 And, Marilyn, you were never good enough for DiMaggio. 461 00:16:09,135 --> 00:16:10,178 Not even close! 462 00:16:10,178 --> 00:16:11,888 I don't know or care who that is. 463 00:16:11,888 --> 00:16:14,307 And, of course, the service was not to his liking. 464 00:16:14,307 --> 00:16:16,017 Oh, thanks for remembering me. 465 00:16:16,017 --> 00:16:17,101 I had to yell at that guy 466 00:16:17,101 --> 00:16:18,186 who was dressed like Frank Sinatra. 467 00:16:18,186 --> 00:16:19,687 That's just a guy with blue eyes. 468 00:16:19,687 --> 00:16:21,272 And why are you riding me like this? 469 00:16:21,272 --> 00:16:22,398 What, because I'm your grandfather, 470 00:16:22,398 --> 00:16:24,233 I should let you slack off? Huh? 471 00:16:24,233 --> 00:16:26,360 With that attitude, you get no tip. Fine. 472 00:16:26,360 --> 00:16:29,197 I'll give you a tip instead. You're bad news, daddy-o. 473 00:16:29,197 --> 00:16:30,656 That's it. Where's Elvis? 474 00:16:30,656 --> 00:16:32,283 I demand to see Elvis! 475 00:16:32,283 --> 00:16:33,993 Love me tender. How can I help you? 476 00:16:33,993 --> 00:16:35,745 This beatnik has no respect. 477 00:16:35,745 --> 00:16:37,371 To think people like me fought in a war 478 00:16:37,371 --> 00:16:39,040 so that he could smoke clove cigarettes 479 00:16:39,040 --> 00:16:40,499 and write poems that don't rhyme. 480 00:16:40,499 --> 00:16:42,001 You didn't fight in the war. 481 00:16:42,001 --> 00:16:43,669 I said people like me! 482 00:16:43,669 --> 00:16:45,588 Why are you being such a turd right now? 483 00:16:45,588 --> 00:16:48,090 Whoa, Goldnerd, much as I respect you 484 00:16:48,090 --> 00:16:49,425 for treating customers like this, 485 00:16:49,425 --> 00:16:51,052 you can't treat customers like this. 486 00:16:51,052 --> 00:16:52,637 You're fired. What? 487 00:16:52,637 --> 00:16:54,764 No, I-I didn't mean -- Save it! 488 00:16:54,764 --> 00:16:56,641 All you wanted was for me to get a job 489 00:16:56,641 --> 00:16:59,185 and learn how to work hard, then you come here and ruin it? 490 00:16:59,185 --> 00:17:00,937 Thanks a lot, Pop-Pop. 491 00:17:00,937 --> 00:17:03,898 ♪♪ 492 00:17:06,150 --> 00:17:08,819 With Barry's help, my mom was ready 493 00:17:08,819 --> 00:17:10,404 to honky-tonk the night away and reclaim her youth. 494 00:17:10,404 --> 00:17:12,281 But she forgot one thing... 495 00:17:12,281 --> 00:17:13,991 Okay, we're off. 496 00:17:13,991 --> 00:17:17,286 Muriel just woke up, and, uh, she's in a mood. Enjoy. 497 00:17:17,286 --> 00:17:18,287 Wait, you guys are going out? 498 00:17:18,287 --> 00:17:20,539 Remember? You're babysitting? 499 00:17:20,539 --> 00:17:23,042 We have Lou's dumb eye man award ceremony. 500 00:17:23,042 --> 00:17:24,543 Geoff: He's being honored by 501 00:17:24,543 --> 00:17:26,045 the Professional Ophthalmologists of Philadelphia. 502 00:17:26,045 --> 00:17:27,421 Yes, the acronym is POOP, 503 00:17:27,421 --> 00:17:28,923 and, no, I don't know why they don't change it. 504 00:17:28,923 --> 00:17:30,716 So Lou's winning a...? 505 00:17:30,716 --> 00:17:32,260 You know it's a Poopie. 506 00:17:32,260 --> 00:17:34,220 And how would you phrase it if he won? 507 00:17:34,220 --> 00:17:36,180 [ Sighs ] My dad brought home the Poopie. 508 00:17:36,180 --> 00:17:37,056 Yeah, worth it. 509 00:17:38,599 --> 00:17:40,059 [ Sighs ] 510 00:17:40,059 --> 00:17:41,477 Well, I guess it's for the best. 511 00:17:41,477 --> 00:17:44,981 I would've just embarrassed myself again anyway. 512 00:17:44,981 --> 00:17:47,775 Back to being just a grandma. 513 00:17:47,775 --> 00:17:49,986 Maybe there's another option. 514 00:17:49,986 --> 00:17:52,196 [ Country music playing ] 515 00:17:52,196 --> 00:17:55,366 So they did what any fun, youthful grandma would do -- 516 00:17:55,366 --> 00:17:57,535 bring a baby to a Country-Western bar. 517 00:17:57,535 --> 00:17:59,537 I need to borrow the mic for a second. 518 00:17:59,537 --> 00:18:01,247 That's not something we really -- Yes. Yeah. 519 00:18:01,247 --> 00:18:03,124 [ Clears throat ] Attention, honky-tonkers. 520 00:18:03,124 --> 00:18:04,250 Barry: Whoo! 521 00:18:04,250 --> 00:18:05,501 The other night, 522 00:18:05,501 --> 00:18:06,836 I made a bit of a fool of myself 523 00:18:06,836 --> 00:18:08,379 here on the dance floor, 524 00:18:08,379 --> 00:18:11,966 and I have to admit, I was feelin' kind of low. 525 00:18:11,966 --> 00:18:14,385 But then someone reminded me 526 00:18:14,385 --> 00:18:17,555 that just because you get a little older, 527 00:18:17,555 --> 00:18:20,433 it doesn't mean you're not still young at heart. 528 00:18:20,433 --> 00:18:23,436 I'd like to dedicate this first dance to him. 529 00:18:23,436 --> 00:18:24,645 We don't do dedications. 530 00:18:24,645 --> 00:18:27,356 To my son, Bronco Goldberg. 531 00:18:27,356 --> 00:18:28,774 [ Cheers and applause ] [ Laughs ] 532 00:18:28,774 --> 00:18:30,026 You may begin the hoedown! 533 00:18:30,026 --> 00:18:31,027 Whoo! 534 00:18:31,027 --> 00:18:32,278 -Yee-haw! -Whoo-hoo! 535 00:18:32,278 --> 00:18:33,487 This is a terrible idea, Beverly. 536 00:18:33,487 --> 00:18:35,072 You are gonna fall on that baby. 537 00:18:35,072 --> 00:18:36,907 The only thing I'm gonna destroy 538 00:18:36,907 --> 00:18:38,576 is the dance floor. 539 00:18:38,576 --> 00:18:39,619 What? 540 00:18:39,619 --> 00:18:41,871 No. No. I said "fall." 541 00:18:41,871 --> 00:18:43,748 Did you not hear me? 542 00:18:43,748 --> 00:18:46,000 I'm even more concerned now. 543 00:18:46,000 --> 00:18:48,836 And with that, my mom was back in the saddle... 544 00:18:48,836 --> 00:18:52,173 I'm the first woman to have it all! 545 00:18:52,173 --> 00:18:55,801 ...while I was still saddled with disappointment. 546 00:18:55,801 --> 00:18:57,386 You got a second? 547 00:18:57,386 --> 00:18:58,596 Whatever. 548 00:18:58,596 --> 00:19:00,306 I got your job back. 549 00:19:00,306 --> 00:19:02,141 Thanks. 550 00:19:02,141 --> 00:19:03,809 But I still don't understand 551 00:19:03,809 --> 00:19:05,353 why you came in and acted that way. 552 00:19:05,353 --> 00:19:07,605 It was like you were mad at me or something. 553 00:19:07,605 --> 00:19:09,106 I dunno. 554 00:19:09,106 --> 00:19:10,816 Sort of got used to having you around. 555 00:19:10,816 --> 00:19:14,362 And I thought maybe it didn't mean as much to you 556 00:19:14,362 --> 00:19:15,071 as it did to me. 557 00:19:16,947 --> 00:19:20,201 So...you missed me. 558 00:19:20,201 --> 00:19:22,161 Hey, don't put words in my mouth. 559 00:19:22,161 --> 00:19:23,537 But, yeah, I guess I did. 560 00:19:23,537 --> 00:19:25,831 You could have just said something. 561 00:19:25,831 --> 00:19:29,210 I'm not so good at yapping about my feelings and whatnot. 562 00:19:29,210 --> 00:19:30,419 It's not what I do. 563 00:19:30,419 --> 00:19:33,506 Well, I think you're doing it right now. 564 00:19:33,506 --> 00:19:35,675 You know, you're pretty smart for a total idiot. 565 00:19:35,675 --> 00:19:39,804 ♪♪ 566 00:19:39,804 --> 00:19:42,682 Getting older can be hard, no matter what age we are. 567 00:19:42,682 --> 00:19:43,557 [ Groans ] 568 00:19:43,557 --> 00:19:45,476 Yee-haw! 569 00:19:45,476 --> 00:19:46,977 But the amazing thing is, 570 00:19:46,977 --> 00:19:49,105 that doesn't mean we can't change for the better. 571 00:19:49,105 --> 00:19:50,940 Wanna hold her? [ Gasps ] Yes. 572 00:19:50,940 --> 00:19:52,608 Oh! 573 00:19:52,608 --> 00:19:55,027 Oh, she's so precious. 574 00:19:55,027 --> 00:19:56,654 You must be so happy, Beverly. 575 00:19:56,654 --> 00:19:59,031 I am. I really am. 576 00:19:59,031 --> 00:20:00,491 And at least now you've got someone 577 00:20:00,491 --> 00:20:02,118 who's your intellectual equal. 578 00:20:02,118 --> 00:20:04,161 Gasp! Was that a swipe at me? 579 00:20:05,830 --> 00:20:07,790 Thank you, Jane Bales. 580 00:20:07,790 --> 00:20:11,127 Because no matter how many candles burn on our cake, 581 00:20:11,127 --> 00:20:14,505 what keeps us young is the fire that burns in our hearts. 582 00:20:14,505 --> 00:20:15,965 ♪♪ 583 00:20:15,965 --> 00:20:17,341 And regardless of what age we are, 584 00:20:17,341 --> 00:20:19,760 the lessons we learn along the way 585 00:20:19,760 --> 00:20:20,720 are most special... 586 00:20:20,720 --> 00:20:22,388 Oh. Aw! Ah! 587 00:20:22,388 --> 00:20:25,182 ...when we share them with the people we love. 588 00:20:25,182 --> 00:20:28,561 Whoo-hoo! 589 00:20:28,561 --> 00:20:32,273 ♪♪ 590 00:20:34,525 --> 00:20:37,319 events have caused me to realize 591 00:20:37,319 --> 00:20:38,946 that country music is incredibly simple 592 00:20:38,946 --> 00:20:40,656 to write and perform. 593 00:20:40,656 --> 00:20:42,366 That's not even remotely true. 594 00:20:42,366 --> 00:20:44,160 Well, I've written a song and I want you to record it, 595 00:20:44,160 --> 00:20:45,536 vaulting us both to stardom 596 00:20:45,536 --> 00:20:47,037 as a mother-daughter country duo. 597 00:20:47,037 --> 00:20:48,497 Give it a whirl. 598 00:20:48,497 --> 00:20:50,332 I can whirl it into the nearest trash can. 599 00:20:50,332 --> 00:20:53,294 I'll finish folding all of Muriel's laundry. 600 00:20:53,294 --> 00:20:54,920 Ladies and gentlemen, "Bubbe's Waltz." 601 00:20:56,088 --> 00:20:57,798 [ Chuckles ] 602 00:20:57,798 --> 00:20:59,467 [ Strumming guitar ] 603 00:20:59,467 --> 00:21:02,219 ♪ Drove her wagon down to the farm ♪ 604 00:21:02,219 --> 00:21:04,930 ♪ Had a cold beer with some hot shrimp parm ♪ 605 00:21:04,930 --> 00:21:07,433 ♪ She wears a sweater and bedazzled boots ♪ 606 00:21:07,433 --> 00:21:10,311 ♪ She gives nom-noms to her schmoopie-poops ♪ 607 00:21:10,311 --> 00:21:13,230 ♪ She's a bubbe baby with a golden mane ♪ 608 00:21:13,230 --> 00:21:16,150 ♪ She's a bubbe baby with looks and brains ♪ 609 00:21:16,150 --> 00:21:19,695 ♪ She's a bubbe baby with looks and brains ♪ 610 00:21:19,695 --> 00:21:21,238 What do you think? 611 00:21:21,238 --> 00:21:22,865 I think I'm an incredible singer, 612 00:21:22,865 --> 00:21:24,200 and I still can't make this work.