¶¶
(THEME MUSIC PLAYING)
Oh boy!
It's my favorite day of the year!
The annual three legged race
where the whole town comes together
in the spirit of fair play.
And me and my best girl... Minnie!
(MICKEY STUTTERS)
(INHALES HEAVILY)
But we always run this race together.
And we always lose.
That's why this year I'm running with Daisy.
But she's a...
(WHISPERS) Cheater.
I know, Mickey.
But nice guys finish last and you're a...
Loser! (GIGGLES)
Fine! Be a cheater!
I'm gonna win this race fair and square.
First, I have to find a partner. (GRUMBLE)
I'll run that race with ya.
Peg Leg Pete?
But you're the biggest cheater of them all!
I wouldn't dream of cheating.
Hot dog! I knew they were wrong about you, Pete.
The police, the sheriff, the FBI...
On your marks. Get set.
MICKEY: The district attorney's office,
fish and wildlife service...
Go!
The Mounties, Interpol, all my friends...
Hey!
(METAL CLANGS)
(LAUGHS)
(AIR BLOWING)
That's not right.
(TIRES SCREECHING)
(TRIUMPHANT LAUGH)
BOTH: (GASPS) The money.
(BOTH GRUNT)
(LAUGHING)
Oh, no you don't!
(WHIRRS)
(EXPLODING)
MICKEY: Well, Pete,
looks like the cheaters are gonna win again.
That's right, 'cause we're gonna cheat!
What?
No, no, no, wait. Punch!
MICKEY: Now hold on!
PETE: Hi, ladies.
Bye, ladies.
Hey!
(METAL CLANGS)
Who said cheaters never prosper.
(PETE LAUGHS HYSTERICALLY)
Get ready to win, squeaky.
Not if we have to cheat!
Yeah!
(SINGS VICTORY SONG)
(CLEARS THROAT) This is not a sack race, sir.
It is a three legged race.
Disqualified!
Oh, garsh...
Is there no one honorable enough
to win this trophy fair and square?
There is!
(GASPS) (CHEERING)
(GRUNTS AND GROANS)
(GASPS)
I did it! I won fair and square!
(WHISTLING WITH PIANO MUSIC)