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Hey, everyone! I'm your host, Vince Vitale,
and welcome to Chips and Chuckles!
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It's an honor to perform
here at Quesadilla Joe's,
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where Chris Rock got his start.
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Actually,
I got my start in New York City.
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But I love comedy night
at Quesadilla Joe's,
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where you come for the chips,
but you stay for the chuckles.
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Maddie, that's our old pal Vince.
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Vince was the helpful
airline ticket agent we met
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when Maddie tried to
chase Diggie to Australia.
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He was no help at all.
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No, no, he told me where the bathroom was.
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That was super helpful.
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Tonight's vegan
enchilada night here at Quesadilla Joe's,
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which to Vince, oh, that sounds so good.
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But to Morgan Freeman...
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That sounds like an invitation
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to a long night of thunder Down Under.
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Good night...
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and good luck.
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Hey! Vince!
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Vince, do you remember us?
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Joey! Maddie! Flight...
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241 to Milwaukee.
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Vince never forgets a face...
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or a flight.
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You were amazing up there.
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Thanks.
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You were amazing sitting in that chair.
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Thanks.
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It must feel so good to be in
such command of the audience.
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How do you comedians do it?
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Well, we take everything
weird about ourselves
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and toss it out there.
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For Vince, it's funny voices.
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But everybody's got
their own kind of weird.
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Oh, hey, Joey, you have so much weird.
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You could totally do that.
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Using my weirdness to work for
me instead of against me? Huh.
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I've never really thought of that.
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Hm.
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Could my greatest weakness
be my greatest strength?
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Am I some kind of comedy superhero?
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Oh, is this my origin story?
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Me? Do stand-up? No.
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G... guys, no. What would I even say?
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Just talk about your life.
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You probably have more
to say than you realize.
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I mean... the ladies in Cat Appreciation
Club do find me fascinatin'.
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See? You're a complete mess.
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You're gonna be great at this.
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♪ Better in stereo ♪
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♪ B... B... better in stereo ♪
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♪ I'm up with the sunshine ♪
♪ Let's go ♪
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♪ I lace up my high tops ♪
♪ Oh no ♪
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♪ Slam dunk ♪
♪ Ready or not ♪
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♪ Yeah, show me what you got ♪
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♪ I'm under the spotlight ♪
♪ Holler ♪
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♪ I dare you, come on and follow ♪
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♪ You dance to your own beat ♪
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♪ I'll sing the melody ♪
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♪ When you say yea-ah-ah ♪
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♪ I say no-oh-oh ♪
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♪ When you say stop ♪
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♪ All I want to do is go, go, go ♪
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♪ You, you, the other half of me, me ♪
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♪ The half I'll never be-e ♪
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♪ The half that drives me crazy ♪
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♪ You, you, the better half of me, me ♪
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♪ The half I'll always nee-eed ♪
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♪ But we both know ♪
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♪ We're better in stereo ♪
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"Boom or Doom Chemistry Challenge."
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Did you say "challenge," flyer?
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Challenge accepted!
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Boom or Doom is a
two-person biochem challenge.
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The winning team gets embroidered
patches for its lab coats.
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We're scientists.
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We take flair on our
lab coats very seriously.
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Oh, hey, Val.
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What's in the beakers?
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One's concentrated fox
urine for enzyme analysis.
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The other one's apple juice.
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Shoot. I forgot which is which.
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Lunch is gonna be exciting!
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If Val's my partner for the Boom or
Doom, there's no way we'll lose.
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So this is how it feels
to have intellectual peers!
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What do you say?
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Me and you? Friday night?
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Seriously?
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You and me?
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I can't think of a better pair.
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Um, yes.
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I'd like that.
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See you later.
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Well, well, well.
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I had no idea that my
brother was such a playa!
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What are you talking about, Munch?
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You just asked Val to the dance.
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Hence the "playa"!
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What?
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No, I asked her to do Boom or Doom with me.
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No, you said, "Me and you? Friday night?"
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And then you went like this.
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Kapow!
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You asked her to the Boom-Shaboom Dance.
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You said you couldn't
think of a better pair.
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Parky, that is so romantic.
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No!
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I meant Boom or Doom, not Boom-Shaboom!
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She knows which Boom I meant, right?
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Why are there so many Booms?
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Well, they're both Friday night,
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so you better tell her that you
meant the chemistry challenge.
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Joey, I can't do that.
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If she thinks I asked her to the dance
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and I tell her I didn't,
she's gonna be crushed.
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Yeah, well... then ya
better clarify, playa!
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Stop!
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Hey, Val...
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Hey, Parker.
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I figured out which one's apple juice.
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I'm not gonna tell you how.
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So...
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about Friday night...
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what... where do... what
are you gonna wear to...
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that thing...
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that we're doing...
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together...
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with us?
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The suggested dress code is on the flyer.
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One says "lab coat" and the other says
"smart, festive, dressy, casual."
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What does that even mean?
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You guys will never
believe what just happened.
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Tell them, Ruby.
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I got all A's on my report card!
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Oh, that's wonderful!
Fantastic.
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I mean, I just personally
think that that deserves
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some kind of reward, right, Aunt Dena?
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It sure does.
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What would you like, Ruby?
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Gosh, I hadn't really thought about it.
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I want to get my ears pierced.
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Oh.
Ooh.
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Well, it is a perfect time
for physical transformation.
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Mars is in retrograde and the mall
is having a sale on dolphin earrings.
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Dena, this is a major bonding experience.
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There's nothing like
watching your little girl
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march towards adulthood by
watching a complete stranger
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jam a pin through her ear. Mm-mm.
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Yeah, and you know what, you really
are in such great hands, Ruby.
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I mean, when I was here before and
I was shooting ♪ Sing it Loud! ♪
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Your mom actually took
me to get my ears pierced.
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No, no, no, no, Liv.
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Actually, I took you
to get your ears pierced
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when you were home in Wisconsin on hiatus.
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Liv?
Maddie?
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Dena?
Dinner?
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Spill.
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Um... Okay, so... Mom, you didn't
really take me to get my ears pierced.
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You took me.
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But that was weeks before I took Liv.
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Yeah, it was.
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But I wore a headband over my ears
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until the holes closed and
then you took me again as Liv.
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Now wait a minute,
let me get this straight.
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You two pulled a
switch-a-Rooney on me
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for one of the pinnacle
moments of a mother's life?
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And her daughter's.
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Whatever.
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I just, I... I couldn't wait, Mom,
so I convinced Aunt Dena to take me.
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I'm weak, Karen.
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Don't let this tip your
scale into anger and darkness.
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Oh, I will show you anger and darkness.
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In high school, Mom took me
to see Duran Duran without you.
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Duran Duran was my band!
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Not that night they weren't.
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Oh!
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What's Duran Duran?
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Oh, um, it's sort of like One
Direction but for old ladies.
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Hey, Joe.
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Ready for your big stand-up debut?
Oh, you know it.
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I've been writin' material.
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Maddie, I'm startin' to
think that this is my thang.
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Yeah, that's right.
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Joey Rooney got a thang.
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Here to introduce our next act,
Matthew McConaughey, George W. Bush,
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Charles Barkley, and Adam Sandler.
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I believe it's gonna be
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all right, all right, all right.
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Looking
forward to some sweet jokification.
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I just
hope this knucklehead isn't terrible.
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Ladies
and gentlemen, please welcome
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Mr. Joey Rooney!
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Joey!
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Um... so...
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Um... hi.
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My heart was beating so loud,
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I could barely hear the
vomit coming up in my throat.
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Uh...
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I... I can't do this.
201
00:10:02,586 --> 00:10:07,557
I'm finding my peace...
finding my center.
202
00:10:08,959 --> 00:10:11,906
It's not working!
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My conflict with Karen has
ravaged my inner tranquility.
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Do you know what would cheer you up?
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Taking me to the mall
to get my ears pierced.
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00:10:25,776 --> 00:10:28,456
Ruby, I don't feel comfortable doing that
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00:10:28,480 --> 00:10:31,725
until I have healed things with my sister.
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00:10:31,749 --> 00:10:34,350
Putting a hole in your ear
won't fix the hole in her heart.
209
00:10:35,519 --> 00:10:36,831
Wait.
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00:10:36,855 --> 00:10:38,575
I think I know a way to make things better.
211
00:10:38,599 --> 00:10:42,102
A little something I like to
call "the empty gesture."
212
00:10:42,126 --> 00:10:44,905
That sounds underhanded.
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00:10:44,929 --> 00:10:46,195
Go on.
214
00:10:47,331 --> 00:10:48,909
Okay, so Aunt Dena,
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00:10:48,933 --> 00:10:51,779
you tell my mom that she can
take Ruby to get her ears pierced.
216
00:10:51,803 --> 00:10:53,848
My mom will appreciate the gesture,
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00:10:53,872 --> 00:10:56,083
but she knows what a big
bonding experience this is
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00:10:56,107 --> 00:10:58,507
for a mother and a daughter,
she'll insist that you take her.
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Boom! Hearts healed, ears pierced.
220
00:11:02,880 --> 00:11:04,792
Hi, girls. Oh, you're here.
221
00:11:04,816 --> 00:11:07,550
Thought you'd be out with Liv
picking out her wedding dress.
222
00:11:11,622 --> 00:11:13,167
Karen?
Hm?
223
00:11:13,191 --> 00:11:16,804
I'm going to make an appointment to take
Ruby to get her ears pierced tomorrow,
224
00:11:16,828 --> 00:11:19,095
but I think you should take her.
225
00:11:22,199 --> 00:11:23,677
It's only fair.
226
00:11:23,701 --> 00:11:27,147
Well, that is a very generous gesture.
227
00:11:27,171 --> 00:11:30,818
Oh, please. I know an
empty gesture when I see it.
228
00:11:30,842 --> 00:11:33,654
I would love to take Ruby.
229
00:11:33,678 --> 00:11:35,778
Oh, thanks, Dena. You're a peach.
230
00:11:48,191 --> 00:11:50,204
Joey?
231
00:11:50,228 --> 00:11:51,372
What are you doin'?
232
00:11:51,396 --> 00:11:53,829
I'm jumping my sadness away.
233
00:11:56,533 --> 00:11:58,253
Why don't you come out here and talk to me?
234
00:12:03,073 --> 00:12:04,485
Hey.
235
00:12:04,509 --> 00:12:05,841
So what happened?
236
00:12:10,280 --> 00:12:11,926
Maddie, I choked.
237
00:12:11,950 --> 00:12:15,062
I had no idea it would be that hard.
238
00:12:15,086 --> 00:12:16,897
I mean, all those people looking at me.
239
00:12:16,921 --> 00:12:20,100
I mean, I just kept thinking, "What
if they don't think I'm funny?"
240
00:12:20,124 --> 00:12:22,603
But, Joey, you're a really funny guy.
241
00:12:22,627 --> 00:12:27,241
Yeah, maybe when I'm clowning around,
but stand-up is so different.
242
00:12:27,265 --> 00:12:30,833
I mean, I gotta really
put myself out there.
243
00:12:31,969 --> 00:12:34,682
It sounds to me like you're kind of scared.
244
00:12:34,706 --> 00:12:37,186
Yeah, well, I didn't vomit in
my mouth because I was confident.
245
00:12:40,911 --> 00:12:44,058
All right, well, um... maybe I can help.
246
00:12:44,082 --> 00:12:47,895
What's the thing that scares you the
most about being up on that stage?
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00:12:47,919 --> 00:12:49,863
Um...
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00:12:49,887 --> 00:12:52,733
I guess that people will
boo and throw stuff at me
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00:12:52,757 --> 00:12:54,323
while I'm feeling naked and vulnerable.
250
00:12:59,830 --> 00:13:01,108
Well done.
251
00:13:01,132 --> 00:13:03,777
I am definitely feeling
naked and vulnerable.
252
00:13:03,801 --> 00:13:07,147
Well, good, 'cause it is, uh,
time that you face your fears.
253
00:13:07,171 --> 00:13:10,172
So... tell me a joke, funny boy.
254
00:13:11,642 --> 00:13:12,975
Okay. Um...
255
00:13:14,678 --> 00:13:15,723
Knock-knock...
256
00:13:15,747 --> 00:13:17,625
Boo!
What are you...
257
00:13:17,649 --> 00:13:18,993
No!
258
00:13:19,017 --> 00:13:20,961
You're supposed to say, "Who's there?"
259
00:13:20,985 --> 00:13:22,262
You stink!
260
00:13:22,286 --> 00:13:23,897
Ow!
261
00:13:23,921 --> 00:13:25,799
No! Why can't you throw like a girl?
262
00:13:25,823 --> 00:13:27,901
Like a what?
263
00:13:27,925 --> 00:13:29,103
Sorry! I'm sorry...
264
00:13:29,127 --> 00:13:30,471
I'm sorry!
265
00:13:30,495 --> 00:13:32,261
Maddie, I'm sorry!
266
00:13:33,964 --> 00:13:38,579
Liv, I've got a story idea for
an episode of... you know.
267
00:13:38,603 --> 00:13:43,183
♪ Sing it Louder! ♪
268
00:13:43,207 --> 00:13:45,819
Uh... yeah.
Yeah.
269
00:13:45,843 --> 00:13:47,688
Sure, that's the one. Okay.
Yeah.
270
00:13:47,712 --> 00:13:50,324
So this really cool guy asks Sasha to do
271
00:13:50,348 --> 00:13:52,926
a chemistry challenge with
him by gesturing to a flyer,
272
00:13:52,950 --> 00:13:55,763
but the flyer is right next to
a banner for the school dance,
273
00:13:55,787 --> 00:14:00,467
and he's not sure if she said yes
to the challenge or to the dance.
274
00:14:00,491 --> 00:14:04,672
So, what do you think
the cool guy should do?
275
00:14:04,696 --> 00:14:06,929
I need to know ASAP.
276
00:14:07,964 --> 00:14:11,133
Hmm... Wait a second.
277
00:14:12,335 --> 00:14:14,882
You just said "I" as in you!
278
00:14:14,906 --> 00:14:19,453
This isn't a story idea, you're
coming to me for girl advice!
279
00:14:19,477 --> 00:14:23,190
I'm gonna go make a pot of tea and
I'm gonna get my pan flute CD.
280
00:14:23,214 --> 00:14:26,048
Come on. Liv, don't be Mom.
281
00:14:27,050 --> 00:14:28,896
I guess I do kind of
sound like Mom.
282
00:14:28,920 --> 00:14:31,565
I totally get her now!
283
00:14:31,589 --> 00:14:33,967
She just wants to be in our lives!
284
00:14:33,991 --> 00:14:35,202
Liv talked about me?
285
00:14:35,226 --> 00:14:36,904
What did she say? Tell me anything!
286
00:14:36,928 --> 00:14:38,972
I just want to be in her life!
287
00:14:38,996 --> 00:14:40,874
What if she wants to go to the dance?
288
00:14:40,898 --> 00:14:42,258
I don't want to hurt her feelings.
289
00:14:42,282 --> 00:14:44,845
Okay, okay, uh, okay,
so you do not want to go
290
00:14:44,869 --> 00:14:46,269
to the dance with this girl, right?
291
00:14:48,038 --> 00:14:49,049
Right.
292
00:14:49,073 --> 00:14:50,793
Why did you just pause
before you said that?
293
00:14:53,076 --> 00:14:54,388
I... I didn't pause.
294
00:14:54,412 --> 00:14:55,644
You totally paused.
295
00:14:57,380 --> 00:14:59,159
Wait a second.
296
00:14:59,183 --> 00:15:02,930
Did you ask this girl to the science thing,
297
00:15:02,954 --> 00:15:06,689
and now you've thought about it, and
now you want to take her to the dance?
298
00:15:07,791 --> 00:15:09,570
No?
That was another pause!
299
00:15:09,594 --> 00:15:11,538
It was a confusing question.
300
00:15:11,562 --> 00:15:13,095
Admit it.
301
00:15:15,866 --> 00:15:17,177
Okay, fine.
302
00:15:17,201 --> 00:15:20,347
I didn't realize it at first, but
yes, I want to take her to the dance.
303
00:15:20,371 --> 00:15:23,117
Okay, then you have to let
her know, you gotta put on a suit,
304
00:15:23,141 --> 00:15:28,222
you gotta show up, and you gotta hope
that that's the way that she feels too.
305
00:15:28,246 --> 00:15:30,524
You know what? You're right.
306
00:15:30,548 --> 00:15:31,981
Go big or go home.
Yes!
307
00:15:37,721 --> 00:15:39,455
This is very exciting.
308
00:15:40,891 --> 00:15:42,136
Please don't do the whoo.
309
00:15:42,160 --> 00:15:43,771
I'm sorry, it's mandatory.
310
00:15:43,795 --> 00:15:45,939
Whoo!
311
00:15:45,963 --> 00:15:48,030
♪ Parker's got a girlfriend ♪
312
00:15:51,601 --> 00:15:53,814
Are you sure that you want
to go through with this, Mom?
313
00:15:53,838 --> 00:15:56,283
I mean, wouldn't it be
better to invite Aunt Dena
314
00:15:56,307 --> 00:15:58,152
to go with you to get Ruby's ears pierced?
315
00:15:58,176 --> 00:15:59,419
No, it wouldn't, Maddie.
316
00:15:59,443 --> 00:16:00,721
I'm Liv.
317
00:16:00,745 --> 00:16:02,156
Are you?
318
00:16:02,180 --> 00:16:03,746
Are you?
319
00:16:05,816 --> 00:16:07,628
Come on, Ruby. Let's go.
320
00:16:07,652 --> 00:16:09,819
You know what, Aunt Karen?
321
00:16:10,821 --> 00:16:13,088
I don't want to get my
ears pierced anymore.
322
00:16:13,990 --> 00:16:18,427
It's gonna hurt you and my mom,
and that'll make me feel bad.
323
00:16:19,629 --> 00:16:24,433
Sweetie, I was trying to make
your mom feel bad, not you.
324
00:16:25,669 --> 00:16:27,614
Oh... Dena!
325
00:16:27,638 --> 00:16:29,149
Yes?
326
00:16:29,173 --> 00:16:32,208
Did you get my silent messages
through the spirit transom?
327
00:16:33,877 --> 00:16:36,190
Take Ruby to get her ears pierced.
328
00:16:36,214 --> 00:16:40,127
This is something that a mother and
daughter should experience together.
329
00:16:40,151 --> 00:16:41,161
I'm sorry.
330
00:16:41,185 --> 00:16:43,185
No, I'm sorry.
331
00:16:44,154 --> 00:16:46,133
Oh, would you join us?
332
00:16:46,157 --> 00:16:48,335
Well, I would be honored.
333
00:16:48,359 --> 00:16:49,469
Oh!
334
00:16:49,493 --> 00:16:50,971
Both: Sis!
335
00:16:50,995 --> 00:16:53,262
Sisters healed, hearts mended. Let's go.
336
00:16:58,169 --> 00:17:00,102
Hold it, Straight A's.
337
00:17:01,204 --> 00:17:03,317
Did you just bluff my mother?
338
00:17:03,341 --> 00:17:06,520
Hey, if I'm old enough
to get my ears pierced,
339
00:17:06,544 --> 00:17:08,644
I'm old enough to manipulate grown-ups.
340
00:17:16,219 --> 00:17:17,586
Hey.
341
00:17:18,889 --> 00:17:22,569
If Val shows up in a lab coat,
I'm gonna look like a doofus.
342
00:17:22,593 --> 00:17:28,130
But at least I'll be
one fine-looking doofus.
343
00:17:37,007 --> 00:17:38,340
Hey, Val.
344
00:17:41,111 --> 00:17:46,081
Look at you... dressed for
the biochem challenge.
345
00:17:47,450 --> 00:17:49,096
Ouch.
346
00:17:49,120 --> 00:17:50,352
Oh no.
347
00:17:55,258 --> 00:17:56,570
So...
348
00:17:56,594 --> 00:17:58,594
um...
349
00:18:00,196 --> 00:18:02,331
that's a really nice lab coat.
350
00:18:03,433 --> 00:18:05,212
Thanks.
351
00:18:05,236 --> 00:18:07,102
Nice suit.
352
00:18:09,873 --> 00:18:13,108
Did you think you asked me to the dance?
353
00:18:17,280 --> 00:18:19,293
Yeah.
354
00:18:19,317 --> 00:18:21,728
I was... kind of hoping.
355
00:18:21,752 --> 00:18:27,189
Actually... I was kind of hoping too.
356
00:18:29,326 --> 00:18:30,971
What do you think?
357
00:18:30,995 --> 00:18:33,495
I don't usually do smart,
festive, dressy, casual.
358
00:18:36,333 --> 00:18:38,867
You couldn't look more perfect.
359
00:18:41,572 --> 00:18:43,150
Whoo!
360
00:18:43,174 --> 00:18:45,285
Playa!
361
00:18:45,309 --> 00:18:47,476
Everybody just cork it!
362
00:18:49,612 --> 00:18:51,258
Shall we Shaboom?
363
00:18:51,282 --> 00:18:53,349
We shall.
364
00:18:59,022 --> 00:19:00,567
Glad you came back, buddy.
365
00:19:00,591 --> 00:19:02,636
Look, everyone bombs their first time.
366
00:19:02,660 --> 00:19:04,838
Just remember, if a joke doesn't go well,
367
00:19:04,862 --> 00:19:06,422
hit 'em with your Morgan Freeman voice.
368
00:19:06,446 --> 00:19:08,942
No, Vince, I don't have
a Morgan Freeman voice.
369
00:19:08,966 --> 00:19:11,333
Well, you best get one, sonny.
370
00:19:13,137 --> 00:19:16,772
Because Morgan Freeman will save you...
every time.
371
00:19:20,176 --> 00:19:22,322
Maddie, I'm nervous...
372
00:19:22,346 --> 00:19:24,091
Maddie, I'm nervous.
373
00:19:24,115 --> 00:19:26,782
You know what? You got this, bro.
374
00:19:27,884 --> 00:19:30,819
Ladies and gentlemen, Joey Rooney!
375
00:19:33,024 --> 00:19:34,223
Joey!
376
00:19:39,397 --> 00:19:47,397
So, um... so I... I peaked physically...
very early, like ridiculously early,
377
00:19:48,472 --> 00:19:50,506
like when I was two.
378
00:19:52,009 --> 00:19:53,987
I, uh...
379
00:19:54,011 --> 00:19:58,325
Like seriously. Like, when I was
two, I got these glasses, right?
380
00:19:58,349 --> 00:19:59,989
And I've had these lips since I was born.
381
00:20:00,013 --> 00:20:01,862
I looked like a cartoon character, guys.
382
00:20:01,886 --> 00:20:05,665
I was adorable, the epitome of cute.
383
00:20:05,689 --> 00:20:10,037
And then from about three years old to now,
384
00:20:10,061 --> 00:20:13,907
I've kind of coasted at
middle-aged female librarian.
385
00:20:13,931 --> 00:20:16,410
Which is fine. It's fine.
386
00:20:16,434 --> 00:20:17,978
I just have, like, this kind of face.
387
00:20:18,002 --> 00:20:20,522
You know, like, I have the glasses.
Like, I'm stereotyped a lot.
388
00:20:20,546 --> 00:20:23,350
I was in my counselor's office and
we were setting up my schedule
389
00:20:23,374 --> 00:20:27,387
and, um... and I was like, "I'd
like to be in Advanced Robotics,"
390
00:20:27,411 --> 00:20:30,424
and she goes, "Mm, actually, I
wouldn't recommend Advanced Robotics
391
00:20:30,448 --> 00:20:34,027
'cause the schedule conflicts
with the marching band."
392
00:20:34,051 --> 00:20:35,862
And I was like...
393
00:20:35,886 --> 00:20:38,454
"I'm in the marching band?"
394
00:20:39,522 --> 00:20:45,427
And my counselor was like,"
You're not in the marching band?"
395
00:20:47,398 --> 00:20:50,444
I moved to LA, uh, about four months ago.
396
00:20:50,468 --> 00:20:52,345
I've lived here for like
four months. It's different.
397
00:20:52,369 --> 00:20:55,382
Like, I'm from Wisconsin. Back in
Wisconsin, I'm a senior in high school.
398
00:20:55,406 --> 00:20:56,750
I'm a senior in high school here.
399
00:20:56,774 --> 00:20:58,852
I was really looking forward to
being like... It's how it works.
400
00:20:58,876 --> 00:21:00,353
You know, I get downgraded.
401
00:21:00,377 --> 00:21:01,543
Now I'm in seventh grade now.
402
00:21:02,445 --> 00:21:05,459
But in California, like, I... I wanted...
403
00:21:05,483 --> 00:21:08,283
I was looking forward to being, like,
the senior and getting the, like,
404
00:21:08,307 --> 00:21:12,365
Most Likely to Succeed or whatever,
like, in the back of the yearbook,
405
00:21:12,389 --> 00:21:15,829
and then I moved to California and they are
much different than they were in Wisconsin.
406
00:21:15,853 --> 00:21:18,988
I get to California and
it's like Best Vibes.
407
00:21:20,464 --> 00:21:23,866
And like Most Likely to
Stick to a Juice Cleanse.
408
00:21:25,768 --> 00:21:29,082
When I first got here, I saw a lot
of girls walking around school
409
00:21:29,106 --> 00:21:31,084
with like "I Heart Nerds" shirts.
410
00:21:31,108 --> 00:21:33,153
Or like "I'm Gonna Marry a Nerd."
411
00:21:33,177 --> 00:21:36,256
And I was like, "I have
come to my paradise.
412
00:21:36,280 --> 00:21:38,325
"This is it.
413
00:21:38,349 --> 00:21:40,160
LA is where I belong!"
414
00:21:40,184 --> 00:21:44,464
And then I found out these
girls don't actually like nerds.
415
00:21:44,488 --> 00:21:49,158
These girls like hot, muscular
guys that sometimes wear glasses.
416
00:21:51,695 --> 00:21:53,306
And that is not the same.
417
00:21:53,330 --> 00:21:54,841
Guys, not the same.
418
00:21:54,865 --> 00:21:59,312
I, uh... I'm turning 18 soon.
It's exciting.
419
00:21:59,336 --> 00:22:01,748
A lot of new things become
available to me when I turn 18.
420
00:22:01,772 --> 00:22:06,508
Like, I can buy a lottery ticket,
like, I can go to real person prison,
421
00:22:07,945 --> 00:22:10,312
That's exciting. The stakes are high.
422
00:22:11,448 --> 00:22:13,126
I can get a tattoo.
423
00:22:13,150 --> 00:22:14,461
Yeah, I can get a tattoo.
424
00:22:14,485 --> 00:22:18,365
A friend of mine just got a tattoo
and got, um, "To the moon and back"
425
00:22:18,389 --> 00:22:21,601
in his mom's handwriting 'cause that's
something his mom said to him a lot.
426
00:22:21,625 --> 00:22:25,472
And then in his dad's
handwriting, he got "Carpe Diem."
427
00:22:25,496 --> 00:22:27,040
And I was like, "I love that idea.
428
00:22:27,064 --> 00:22:28,275
I can do the same thing."
429
00:22:28,299 --> 00:22:29,976
In my mom's handwriting, I could get
430
00:22:30,000 --> 00:22:32,800
"I love you like fire" 'cause that's
something my mom says to me a lot,
431
00:22:32,824 --> 00:22:34,848
and then in my dad's
handwriting I could get
432
00:22:34,872 --> 00:22:37,005
"Why can't you be more like your sisters?"
433
00:22:38,075 --> 00:22:39,519
Thank you guys so much.
434
00:22:39,543 --> 00:22:41,054
I'm Joey Rooney. You were awesome.
435
00:22:41,078 --> 00:22:43,356
Whoo!
436
00:22:43,380 --> 00:22:44,913
Thank you.
437
00:22:52,021 --> 00:22:56,136
Thanks for kind of asking me
to the dance tonight, Parker.
438
00:22:56,160 --> 00:22:58,872
Thanks for kind of saying yes.
439
00:22:58,896 --> 00:23:02,142
By the way, you're not a
bad dancer for a scientist.
440
00:23:02,166 --> 00:23:04,177
Thanks. You know, I was gonna invent
441
00:23:04,201 --> 00:23:08,003
a robot that dances for me,
but that just seemed rude.
442
00:23:12,442 --> 00:23:16,445
So is there anything else
that you want to do tonight?
443
00:23:17,580 --> 00:23:20,115
There is something.
444
00:23:21,084 --> 00:23:24,097
We go in that Boom or
Doom Chemistry Challenge?
445
00:23:24,121 --> 00:23:26,455
Challenge accepted!
446
00:23:28,091 --> 00:23:30,659
Oh, now I get why you say that!
447
00:23:32,595 --> 00:23:34,963
You best get one, sonny.