1 00:00:01,543 --> 00:00:02,669 Hi, Mom. 2 00:00:02,752 --> 00:00:06,131 I had the best day doing community service at the senior center. 3 00:00:06,631 --> 00:00:08,133 Helping people feels so great. 4 00:00:08,216 --> 00:00:12,012 Wow, Maddie. I'm so glad. Would you help me set the table? 5 00:00:12,095 --> 00:00:14,180 Ugh! I'm so tired. 6 00:00:15,682 --> 00:00:19,185 I chair the Ridgewood High community service campaign. 7 00:00:19,269 --> 00:00:24,190 My community service is to make sure those lazy slackers do their community service. 8 00:00:24,691 --> 00:00:26,901 I am so proud of you and Liv. 9 00:00:26,985 --> 00:00:29,029 But I'm surprised you didn't pick the same project. 10 00:00:29,112 --> 00:00:32,032 Yeah, well, I think Liv knows that the senior center is my turf. 11 00:00:32,115 --> 00:00:35,076 I've been there for two years. Plus, it's all florescent lighting. 12 00:00:35,160 --> 00:00:37,120 She says it makes her look like she has the flu. 13 00:00:37,704 --> 00:00:41,916 Well, she was unbelievably excited about volunteering for Beautify Wisconsin. 14 00:00:42,959 --> 00:00:46,921 Yeah, wait till she finds out what Beautify Wisconsin actually means. 15 00:00:53,470 --> 00:00:58,391 Turns out Beautify Wisconsin isnot going door-to-door giving makeovers. 16 00:01:01,394 --> 00:01:03,605 I spent two hours in a ditch 17 00:01:03,688 --> 00:01:05,690 picking up anything that people threw out of their cars, 18 00:01:05,774 --> 00:01:09,402 cigarette butts, potato chip bags, and most humiliating of all, 19 00:01:09,486 --> 00:01:12,155 the Season 1 DVD of "Sing it Loud." 20 00:01:19,120 --> 00:01:22,665 ♪ Better in stereo B... b... better in stereo ♪ 21 00:01:22,749 --> 00:01:24,834 -♪ I'm up with the sunshine ♪ -♪ Let's go ♪ 22 00:01:24,918 --> 00:01:27,087 -♪ I lace up my high tops ♪ -♪ Oh, no ♪ 23 00:01:27,170 --> 00:01:31,383 ♪ Slam dunk, ready or not Yeah, show me what you got ♪ 24 00:01:31,466 --> 00:01:33,677 -♪ I'm under the spotlight ♪ -♪ Holler ♪ 25 00:01:33,760 --> 00:01:35,720 ♪ I dare you, come on and follow ♪ 26 00:01:35,804 --> 00:01:39,557 ♪ You dance to your own beat I'll sing the melody ♪ 27 00:01:39,641 --> 00:01:44,270 ♪ When you say yeah, I say no ♪ 28 00:01:44,354 --> 00:01:48,775 ♪ When you say stop all I want to do is go go go ♪ 29 00:01:48,858 --> 00:01:53,947 ♪ You, you, the other half of me, me The half I'll never be ♪ 30 00:01:54,030 --> 00:01:57,409 ♪ The half that drives me crazy ♪ 31 00:01:57,492 --> 00:02:02,997 ♪ You, you, the better half of me, me The half I'll always need ♪ 32 00:02:03,081 --> 00:02:07,002 ♪ But we both know We're better in stereo ♪ 33 00:02:08,586 --> 00:02:11,381 [CHEERING] 34 00:02:11,464 --> 00:02:13,049 All right, all right, porcupines. 35 00:02:13,133 --> 00:02:18,805 Friday night, we play our biggest rivals, the Fairview Tiger Sharks! 36 00:02:18,888 --> 00:02:21,641 [BOOING] 37 00:02:21,725 --> 00:02:26,730 And every year, those Tiger Sharks try to steal our beloved mascot, 38 00:02:26,813 --> 00:02:28,773 Paulie the Porcupine! 39 00:02:28,857 --> 00:02:32,277 [CHEERING] 40 00:02:32,360 --> 00:02:33,862 But the night before the big game, 41 00:02:33,945 --> 00:02:37,073 two freshman are chosen to watch over Paulie. 42 00:02:37,407 --> 00:02:40,827 As basketball team captain, I have selected Joey Rooney 43 00:02:40,910 --> 00:02:44,998 and Skippy Ramirez to keep Paulie safe from the Tiger Sharks. 44 00:02:45,081 --> 00:02:47,417 [BOOING] 45 00:02:47,500 --> 00:02:50,295 I'm sorry. Just to be clear, are you booing us, 46 00:02:50,378 --> 00:02:51,713 or are you booing the Tiger Sharks? 47 00:02:51,796 --> 00:02:53,381 [BOOING] 48 00:02:53,465 --> 00:02:55,091 Dude, stop saying Tiger Sharks. 49 00:02:55,175 --> 00:02:56,426 [BOOING] 50 00:02:56,509 --> 00:03:00,388 Uh, we are your Paulie protectors. 51 00:03:00,472 --> 00:03:02,682 -[CHEERING] -Yeah. 52 00:03:04,225 --> 00:03:06,644 I begged Diggie for this job. 53 00:03:06,728 --> 00:03:09,564 If Skippy and I could keep Paulie safe all night, 54 00:03:09,814 --> 00:03:11,232 we'd get the honor of... 55 00:03:11,316 --> 00:03:14,194 Hanging the first bratwurst link around Paulie's neck. 56 00:03:14,486 --> 00:03:18,031 It's like winning an olympic medal, but with meat. 57 00:03:20,200 --> 00:03:23,370 Okay, Silver Steppers, you are doing great. 58 00:03:23,453 --> 00:03:26,373 Now, remember, exercise reverses the aging process. 59 00:03:26,456 --> 00:03:29,793 So pretty soon, with a little bit of work, you will all look 70 again. 60 00:03:30,794 --> 00:03:32,379 And if you get any younger than that, 61 00:03:32,462 --> 00:03:34,381 then you'll have to pay full price at the movie theater. 62 00:03:35,507 --> 00:03:38,927 Okay, get ready to switch stations. And go. 63 00:03:39,010 --> 00:03:40,011 [WHISTLE BLOWS] 64 00:03:40,095 --> 00:03:44,265 Hey, if you really wanna get their attention, yell "Bingo." 65 00:03:44,557 --> 00:03:46,726 They'll listen to anything you say after that. 66 00:03:47,769 --> 00:03:51,022 I love my Silver Steppers. I mean, they're a blast. 67 00:03:51,106 --> 00:03:54,192 And they don't think of me as one half of Liv and Maddie. 68 00:03:54,275 --> 00:03:57,070 I'm just me, Maddie. 69 00:03:58,113 --> 00:04:01,408 Although they do keep calling me Addie, but, you know, you can't have everything. 70 00:04:04,077 --> 00:04:05,537 Maddie, hi. 71 00:04:05,912 --> 00:04:06,913 Who's Maddie? 72 00:04:08,415 --> 00:04:10,333 Liv, what are you doing here? 73 00:04:10,417 --> 00:04:12,335 I've decided to ditch the ditch. 74 00:04:13,670 --> 00:04:16,798 I didn't even know that was gonna come out of my mouth until I said it. 75 00:04:16,965 --> 00:04:18,383 Oh, I'm adorable. 76 00:04:19,634 --> 00:04:23,555 Anyway, I'm looking for a new community service idea, and I thought... 77 00:04:23,638 --> 00:04:25,432 Uh, you can't volunteer here! 78 00:04:27,308 --> 00:04:28,893 I already checked. 79 00:04:29,853 --> 00:04:34,941 There is a waiting list for volunteers. 80 00:04:37,444 --> 00:04:41,823 You should check with mom. [CHUCKLES] She will reassign you. 81 00:04:42,991 --> 00:04:46,119 I so wish that we could do this together, you know? 82 00:04:46,202 --> 00:04:50,206 I just... We can't. It's such a bummer. It's so sad. 83 00:04:51,875 --> 00:04:54,794 Next station! [WHISTLE BLOWS] 84 00:04:55,378 --> 00:04:57,547 The truth was I couldn't figure out a nice way 85 00:04:57,630 --> 00:04:59,841 to tell my sister that I needed space, STYLE ::cue() 86 00:05:00,216 --> 00:05:04,262 so technically, I was lying right to her face, which is also my face. 87 00:05:04,346 --> 00:05:08,016 So really I was just lying to myself, which makes it okay. Right? 88 00:05:15,148 --> 00:05:19,861 Check it out. The Fire Magic Smokehouse Deluxe is ready for action. 89 00:05:19,944 --> 00:05:24,366 Complete with thumbprint ignition pad. [BEEPS] 90 00:05:24,449 --> 00:05:26,493 Only I can use it. 91 00:05:26,993 --> 00:05:29,746 Well, then I must have one of those on the stove, the dishwasher, 92 00:05:29,829 --> 00:05:33,416 the dryer, the iron, the vacuum, and the toilet handle after Parker uses it. 93 00:05:34,584 --> 00:05:37,337 Sorry, sorry. That's some grill. Please tell me more. 94 00:05:39,089 --> 00:05:42,884 My scooter broke. It was the weirdest thing. 95 00:05:42,967 --> 00:05:47,097 Me, and Cooper, and Isaac, and Caulden, and Jack, and Richie, 96 00:05:47,180 --> 00:05:50,517 and Stevie, and Evan were riding on it, and it just snapped! 97 00:05:52,102 --> 00:05:53,561 This piece of junk! 98 00:05:54,062 --> 00:05:56,690 Eight people on a scooter? What were you thinking? 99 00:05:56,773 --> 00:05:59,067 We were going for the world record. 100 00:05:59,234 --> 00:06:01,986 Didn't think it would snap till we added Big Wayne. 101 00:06:02,404 --> 00:06:04,739 So can you glue it back together? 102 00:06:04,823 --> 00:06:08,493 I'm sorry, buddy. They haven't invented a glue strong enough to fix that. 103 00:06:08,576 --> 00:06:11,496 Correction, they haven't invented it yet. 104 00:06:11,579 --> 00:06:13,581 To my laboratory! 105 00:06:16,668 --> 00:06:19,170 Look, dudes, just make sure nothing happens to Paulie, all right? 106 00:06:19,254 --> 00:06:22,298 -He's our good luck charm. -I'll crush anyone who comes near him. 107 00:06:24,592 --> 00:06:28,930 Okay, Joey, I can't believe I'm gonna say this, but I think you're the muscle. 108 00:06:30,515 --> 00:06:34,019 I was the muscle, which comes with great responsibility. 109 00:06:34,310 --> 00:06:35,895 At least I think it does. I don't really know. 110 00:06:35,979 --> 00:06:37,397 I've never been the muscle before. 111 00:06:39,232 --> 00:06:40,859 Joey, thanks for hooking me up with this job. 112 00:06:40,942 --> 00:06:42,902 This is gonna be so much fun. 113 00:06:43,862 --> 00:06:44,863 Fun? 114 00:06:45,238 --> 00:06:47,782 Fun? Skippy, this is serious work. 115 00:06:48,366 --> 00:06:51,703 Have you looked around? We can't secure this porcupine. 116 00:06:52,412 --> 00:06:56,166 I did a quick 360 and there are 47 points of entry. 117 00:06:56,249 --> 00:07:00,003 Forty-eight if these Tiger Sharks can tunnel up through the floor. 118 00:07:00,086 --> 00:07:01,963 This is... This is so bad. 119 00:07:02,464 --> 00:07:05,091 We'll be the freshmen that let Paulie fall into enemy hands. 120 00:07:05,175 --> 00:07:07,218 What are we going to do? We can't wait for them to come to us. 121 00:07:07,302 --> 00:07:08,428 We need a new plan! 122 00:07:08,511 --> 00:07:11,264 Okay, give me second. I'm... I'm thinking. 123 00:07:13,016 --> 00:07:14,476 Don't look me in the eye when I'm thinking. 124 00:07:14,559 --> 00:07:16,019 It makes me uncomfortable. 125 00:07:20,023 --> 00:07:22,400 Good practice, guys. Catch you later. 126 00:07:22,484 --> 00:07:24,486 Hey, I'm gonna go sneak up on our Paulie protectors, 127 00:07:24,569 --> 00:07:27,072 give them a good scare, and listen to them scream like little girls. 128 00:07:27,155 --> 00:07:28,573 [FAKES A SCREAM] 129 00:07:29,616 --> 00:07:30,825 See you. 130 00:07:35,372 --> 00:07:37,165 Shark attack! 131 00:07:39,334 --> 00:07:41,169 [SCREAMS] 132 00:07:43,963 --> 00:07:49,052 Four more. Three, two, one, and take a break. 133 00:07:49,135 --> 00:07:54,099 Don't need a break. Thanks to you and my titanium hips, I'm practically bionic. 134 00:07:55,850 --> 00:07:57,727 Okay well, let's not exaggerate things, Budge. 135 00:07:57,811 --> 00:07:59,646 You did need me to unscrew your water bottle. 136 00:07:59,729 --> 00:08:04,943 Ah, no. I can do that myself. But you could use the exercise. 137 00:08:06,444 --> 00:08:08,363 I'm looking out for you, hon. 138 00:08:08,697 --> 00:08:10,865 You're the best thing to hit the wrinkle ranch 139 00:08:10,949 --> 00:08:13,326 since Ralphie showed up in short shorts. 140 00:08:16,204 --> 00:08:19,791 ♪ Cha cha cha cha cha, hey Cha cha cha cha cha, hey ♪ 141 00:08:19,874 --> 00:08:23,044 ♪ Cha cha cha cha cha, hey Cha cha cha cha cha, hey ♪ 142 00:08:23,128 --> 00:08:27,340 ♪ Cha cha cha cha cha, hey Cha cha cha cha cha, hey ♪ 143 00:08:27,424 --> 00:08:29,592 LIV: Okay, everyone, big finish. Big finish. 144 00:08:29,676 --> 00:08:31,302 Jazz hands! 145 00:08:33,388 --> 00:08:34,597 Surprisies. 146 00:08:35,181 --> 00:08:37,225 Liv, what are you doing here? 147 00:08:37,308 --> 00:08:39,728 I'm teaching show choir. I stopped off at the office. 148 00:08:39,811 --> 00:08:41,980 It turns out that they do have more room for volunteers. 149 00:08:42,063 --> 00:08:45,442 So say hello to the Golden Chords. 150 00:08:45,525 --> 00:08:47,861 -♪ Hello ♪ -♪ Hello ♪ 151 00:08:47,944 --> 00:08:50,739 -♪ Hello ♪ -♪ Hello ♪ 152 00:08:51,322 --> 00:08:54,576 ♪ Hello ♪ 153 00:08:55,994 --> 00:08:56,995 Hello. 154 00:08:57,912 --> 00:09:00,665 Am I seeing double, or did I lose a contact? 155 00:09:02,083 --> 00:09:04,461 Baxter Fontanel, charmed. 156 00:09:05,462 --> 00:09:07,922 Baxter, could you put the piano in the corner? 157 00:09:08,006 --> 00:09:11,176 Sure. Send the 70-year-old man with a cane to move the piano. 158 00:09:13,011 --> 00:09:17,140 Um... Wait. Liv, you're gonna practice in here? This is my room. 159 00:09:17,223 --> 00:09:21,102 Yeah, but all the other rooms are booked. Plus, I thought it would be fun to share. 160 00:09:21,186 --> 00:09:23,688 You know, just another twinsie thing that we can do together. 161 00:09:24,189 --> 00:09:28,068 How do you tell your best friend to go back to the ditch she came from? 162 00:09:28,151 --> 00:09:32,447 You look her right in the eye and you lay down the cold, hard truth. 163 00:09:32,947 --> 00:09:35,700 [STRAINED] I am so glad you're here. 164 00:09:37,243 --> 00:09:38,495 [STRAINED] Jazz hands. 165 00:09:39,079 --> 00:09:40,121 Jazz hands! 166 00:09:45,960 --> 00:09:49,506 Getting Paulie out of the school hallway was a stroke of pure genius. 167 00:09:49,589 --> 00:09:52,300 But are you sure this is the best hiding spot? 168 00:09:52,384 --> 00:09:53,968 Absolutely. 169 00:09:58,556 --> 00:10:00,684 He'll be safe until tomorrow. STYLE ::cue() 170 00:10:00,767 --> 00:10:02,185 Your parents aren't gonna notice 171 00:10:02,268 --> 00:10:04,688 a giant porcupine swinging from your oak tree? 172 00:10:04,771 --> 00:10:07,899 No. Everyone's got their nose in their phone nowadays. 173 00:10:07,982 --> 00:10:09,442 Nobody looks up. 174 00:10:13,071 --> 00:10:14,989 Oh, sorry. 175 00:10:15,990 --> 00:10:18,785 I didn't see you there. I was looking at a kitten video. 176 00:10:18,868 --> 00:10:21,996 You should have known you weren't big enough to jump over that baby gate. 177 00:10:23,998 --> 00:10:26,543 Joey, I need answers from you. I need them now. 178 00:10:27,460 --> 00:10:30,463 Bratwurst or pork burgers for the barbecue this weekend? 179 00:10:31,256 --> 00:10:34,551 I know I'm asking early, but I hate to have things hanging over my head. 180 00:10:37,012 --> 00:10:40,849 Well, Dad, pick a dead animal and I'll eat it. 181 00:10:40,932 --> 00:10:42,058 My man! 182 00:10:43,059 --> 00:10:46,021 -Does it look like rain? -KAREN: Oh, that's a good question. 183 00:10:46,104 --> 00:10:47,564 I'll check my phone. 184 00:10:51,276 --> 00:10:56,239 Huh? I'm sorry, wait, what's that? Who's the Paulie protector? This guy! 185 00:10:58,825 --> 00:11:02,579 Oh, it'll be awesome hanging that first bratwurst on Paulie. 186 00:11:02,662 --> 00:11:04,205 Everyone'll be clapping. 187 00:11:04,289 --> 00:11:07,042 Just when they think we can't get any cooler... 188 00:11:07,834 --> 00:11:09,210 Boo-yah! 189 00:11:10,712 --> 00:11:13,089 Oh, it's perfect. Just remember to stay on my left. 190 00:11:13,173 --> 00:11:16,217 We want to be boo-yah. Yah-boo is just stupid. 191 00:11:23,892 --> 00:11:26,061 How's it going with the glue, professor? 192 00:11:26,144 --> 00:11:28,521 Uh, did people ask Einstein "How's it going?" 193 00:11:28,605 --> 00:11:30,106 while he was splitting atoms? 194 00:11:31,900 --> 00:11:34,611 Uh... Einstein didn't split atoms. 195 00:11:34,694 --> 00:11:36,821 Maybe that's because people kept interrupting him. 196 00:11:42,786 --> 00:11:45,872 And now the moment of truth. 197 00:11:51,252 --> 00:11:52,754 Yes, it worked! 198 00:11:55,882 --> 00:11:57,425 This is amazing. 199 00:12:00,220 --> 00:12:03,682 Well, it's impressive, but how are you gonna get my good pan off the fridge? 200 00:12:05,266 --> 00:12:08,853 Mom, a simple "Parker, you're a genius" will do. 201 00:12:12,941 --> 00:12:17,946 ♪ I'm gonna strap on my velcro shoes And dance with the Golden Chords ♪ 202 00:12:18,029 --> 00:12:20,156 GOLDEN CHORDS: ♪ Sing with the Golden Chords ♪ 203 00:12:20,240 --> 00:12:22,450 ♪ Check with the Golden Chords ♪ 204 00:12:22,534 --> 00:12:24,911 ♪ So turn up your hearing aid and... ♪ 205 00:12:24,994 --> 00:12:26,996 GOLDEN CHORDS: ♪ Come see the Golden Chords ♪ 206 00:12:27,080 --> 00:12:32,002 ♪ Liv and the Golden Chords ♪ 207 00:12:34,546 --> 00:12:36,756 Break it down, Baxter! 208 00:12:36,840 --> 00:12:40,343 [BEATBOXING] 209 00:12:40,427 --> 00:12:42,679 ♪ Still got my teeth Still got my hair ♪ 210 00:12:42,762 --> 00:12:44,681 ♪ My funky tight suspenders Give me lots of flair ♪ 211 00:12:44,764 --> 00:12:46,933 -[MIMICS RECORD SCRATCH] -♪ Come on, lady, I'm coming up at you ♪ 212 00:12:47,017 --> 00:12:48,935 ♪ I'm a grey-haired rapper Who's handle is Baxter ♪ 213 00:12:49,019 --> 00:12:50,186 Word. 214 00:12:54,065 --> 00:12:55,608 Wait, I need that. 215 00:12:58,695 --> 00:13:02,032 Liv, this just is not gonna work for me, okay? 216 00:13:02,115 --> 00:13:05,160 You've got us packed over here tighter than Budge's workout pants. 217 00:13:05,827 --> 00:13:08,580 If you got it, flaunt it, honey. 218 00:13:10,081 --> 00:13:11,875 If you got it, I've never seen it. 219 00:13:14,294 --> 00:13:15,920 This is my room and I call dibs. 220 00:13:17,005 --> 00:13:20,258 Dibs? Really? What, are we a couple of first graders? 221 00:13:20,342 --> 00:13:22,552 Are we gonna settle this with a game of dodgeball? 222 00:13:22,635 --> 00:13:24,012 Winner's gonna get the room? 223 00:13:24,846 --> 00:13:26,181 [SQUEALS] 224 00:13:27,974 --> 00:13:30,018 Nice shot, Budge. 225 00:13:33,229 --> 00:13:35,565 Should have stuck with shuffleboard, Granny, 226 00:13:35,648 --> 00:13:37,609 because this game's gonna hurt. 227 00:13:43,823 --> 00:13:45,158 What is wrong with you two? 228 00:13:45,241 --> 00:13:47,410 -What's wrong? -Did you see sharks? 229 00:13:48,453 --> 00:13:52,957 No, but I'll tell you what I did see, a giant bronze porcupine statue 230 00:13:53,041 --> 00:13:56,002 swinging from the tree when I was three blocks away! 231 00:13:57,921 --> 00:14:01,216 Okay. That is a problem, but you have to admit 232 00:14:01,299 --> 00:14:04,386 when you're standing right here, you don't see it at all. 233 00:14:06,680 --> 00:14:08,014 We have to get him back. 234 00:14:08,098 --> 00:14:10,600 If people find out you took him, you'll be outcasts. 235 00:14:10,684 --> 00:14:14,604 I'll be the doofus who picked the outcasts and I'mnot gonna be Diggie the Doofus! 236 00:14:16,272 --> 00:14:17,899 Okay, okay. Let's get him down. 237 00:14:17,982 --> 00:14:20,026 Oh, yeah, take your time, Joey. [SHOUTS] Go! 238 00:14:21,277 --> 00:14:24,197 You two get under Paulie. I'm going to let him down gently. 239 00:14:25,407 --> 00:14:28,368 [GRUNTS] Stupid thing is stuck. 240 00:14:28,868 --> 00:14:30,995 [ROPE CREAKING] 241 00:14:31,079 --> 00:14:33,248 Going this way. Going this way. 242 00:14:35,250 --> 00:14:37,377 [CRASHES] 243 00:14:39,295 --> 00:14:41,047 Dad's grill! 244 00:14:41,131 --> 00:14:42,132 Paulie! 245 00:14:42,215 --> 00:14:43,508 My lemonade! 246 00:14:45,677 --> 00:14:47,429 I fixed my scooter, losers! 247 00:14:48,346 --> 00:14:52,100 Parker, beat it. We have to figure... Wait a second. 248 00:14:52,183 --> 00:14:54,185 How'd you get your scooter back together? 249 00:14:54,269 --> 00:14:55,854 Oh, my new invention. 250 00:14:55,937 --> 00:14:59,024 Parker paste, patent pending. Sticks to anything. 251 00:14:59,107 --> 00:15:03,611 I just glued dad's toilet seat shut, so after dinner, get ready for the show. STYLE ::cue() 252 00:15:05,113 --> 00:15:09,743 Parker, your paste might be the only thing that could get me out of this jam. 253 00:15:10,326 --> 00:15:14,205 Well, I beg of you. As your brother, Parker, please... 254 00:15:14,873 --> 00:15:16,166 Give me some glue. 255 00:15:17,334 --> 00:15:20,670 I think what we have here is what you call a "Swap-portunity." 256 00:15:23,173 --> 00:15:25,508 Ahhh! 257 00:15:25,592 --> 00:15:28,887 Pleasure doing business with you, butt bags. 258 00:15:30,764 --> 00:15:33,099 Diggie, you're better than this. 259 00:15:37,520 --> 00:15:38,855 Ahh! 260 00:15:41,691 --> 00:15:44,944 This is no holds-barred dodgeball. Winner takes the room. Loser takes... 261 00:15:45,028 --> 00:15:46,738 Who cares? You're the loser. 262 00:15:49,991 --> 00:15:52,494 You sure you wanna do this, songbird? 263 00:15:53,078 --> 00:15:55,580 Jazz hands can't save you now. 264 00:15:56,748 --> 00:15:58,124 Oh, I'm sure. 265 00:15:58,208 --> 00:16:00,710 That ditch put ice in my veins. 266 00:16:02,212 --> 00:16:03,838 And a rash on my ankle. 267 00:16:24,776 --> 00:16:26,152 [WHISTLE BLOWS] 268 00:16:28,321 --> 00:16:29,572 MADDIE: Ugh! 269 00:16:35,078 --> 00:16:38,206 [SCREAMING] 270 00:16:46,006 --> 00:16:47,090 [WHISTLE BLOWS] 271 00:16:50,135 --> 00:16:52,220 [GROWLS] 272 00:17:25,628 --> 00:17:28,423 [WORRIED MOANS] 273 00:17:35,055 --> 00:17:38,975 You know what, Maddie? Changed my mind. The room is all yours. 274 00:17:39,059 --> 00:17:40,602 See you. 275 00:17:45,774 --> 00:17:49,819 Do you have any idea what it feels like to have to pick up your daughters 276 00:17:49,903 --> 00:17:53,531 because they started a dodgeball riot at the senior center? 277 00:17:54,240 --> 00:17:56,868 No, you don't, because it's never happened before 278 00:17:56,951 --> 00:17:58,745 in the history of the world. 279 00:18:02,040 --> 00:18:04,668 High marks for originality, what, what? 280 00:18:08,338 --> 00:18:11,341 Because of you, the senior center will no longer allow 281 00:18:11,424 --> 00:18:13,635 my Ridgewood students to volunteer. 282 00:18:13,718 --> 00:18:15,470 Mom, we're really sorry. We messed up. 283 00:18:15,553 --> 00:18:17,514 Yeah, and we swear if we could fix it, we would. 284 00:18:17,597 --> 00:18:22,060 Funny you should mention that because I just happen to have two openings. 285 00:18:22,644 --> 00:18:23,978 Not the ditch! 286 00:18:24,562 --> 00:18:26,564 I signed you both up for double the hours. 287 00:18:26,648 --> 00:18:30,443 Report to mile marker 35, between the cow farm and the sewage plant. 288 00:18:33,029 --> 00:18:34,239 Uh, what what? 289 00:18:37,367 --> 00:18:39,828 -Dibs on the cow farm side. -Ha. 290 00:18:39,911 --> 00:18:41,955 Cute that you think there's a good side. 291 00:18:44,791 --> 00:18:46,126 What happened back there? 292 00:18:47,377 --> 00:18:50,338 I just... The senior center is just kind of my hang, 293 00:18:50,422 --> 00:18:52,799 and you sort of space invaded it. 294 00:18:53,591 --> 00:18:54,634 Got it. 295 00:18:54,718 --> 00:18:57,846 Oh, hey, here's an idea. Next time you have a problem, 296 00:18:57,929 --> 00:19:01,725 tell mebefore the over-80 crowd opens up a can of butt-whoop on us. 297 00:19:03,184 --> 00:19:05,228 -[SNORTS] -So are we good? 298 00:19:05,311 --> 00:19:06,730 Yeah, we're good. 299 00:19:06,813 --> 00:19:07,856 Okay. 300 00:19:17,115 --> 00:19:18,158 Seriously? 301 00:19:19,034 --> 00:19:22,203 Yeah. There's no way I'm losing any sport to you. 302 00:19:22,287 --> 00:19:23,663 [BONES CRACK] 303 00:19:25,915 --> 00:19:27,167 [SQUEALS] 304 00:19:27,250 --> 00:19:29,294 -[SQUEALS] -You throw like a girl! 305 00:19:30,420 --> 00:19:32,464 Come at me! What? What? What? 306 00:19:32,547 --> 00:19:34,674 -Ahhh! -[SCREAMS] 307 00:19:40,388 --> 00:19:42,557 All right, porcupines. 308 00:19:42,640 --> 00:19:47,437 We made it to game day and Paulie is safe and sound. 309 00:19:49,939 --> 00:19:52,734 It took all night, but that parker paste is amazing. 310 00:19:52,817 --> 00:19:55,737 We put Paulie back together and fixed my dad's barbecue. 311 00:19:55,820 --> 00:19:59,949 Oh, and somehow I got a spatula stuck to my elbow. 312 00:20:01,368 --> 00:20:05,955 Gentlemen, your ceremonial bratwursts to bestow upon Paulie. STYLE ::cue() 313 00:20:14,381 --> 00:20:16,675 All right. Do the honors. 314 00:20:26,226 --> 00:20:27,811 All right, big finish. 315 00:20:29,604 --> 00:20:30,814 Boo-yah! 316 00:20:32,232 --> 00:20:33,566 [BOOING] 317 00:20:33,650 --> 00:20:37,487 Oh, we're yah-boo. We're yah-boo. Switch. Switch. Switch. 318 00:20:38,363 --> 00:20:40,782 -Boo-yah! -[CRACKING SOUND] 319 00:20:40,865 --> 00:20:42,283 [LOUD CRASH] 320 00:20:43,284 --> 00:20:44,494 Uh... 321 00:20:46,037 --> 00:20:48,373 Go, porcupines! 322 00:20:48,456 --> 00:20:51,209 -[SCREAMING] -[BOOING] 323 00:20:58,675 --> 00:21:02,929 Joey, my firstborn son. It means a lot to me that you're here 324 00:21:03,013 --> 00:21:06,349 for the maiden burn of the Fire Magic Smokehouse Deluxe. 325 00:21:06,433 --> 00:21:07,642 [SIZZLING] 326 00:21:07,726 --> 00:21:10,103 Someday, all this will be yours. 327 00:21:10,687 --> 00:21:14,232 Yeah, yeah. Dad, that's great. Uh, grill's all right though, right? 328 00:21:14,315 --> 00:21:16,109 No whiffs of burning glue? 329 00:21:16,901 --> 00:21:19,654 No, it's fine. Why are you acting so weird? 330 00:21:19,738 --> 00:21:22,699 Hey, look. Parker's here. Yeah. 331 00:21:24,325 --> 00:21:27,287 Oh, it's awesome. Your scooter's still in one piece. 332 00:21:27,370 --> 00:21:28,955 You know, I was kind of worried about Parker Paste 333 00:21:29,039 --> 00:21:31,207 after the whole Paulie fiasco, 334 00:21:31,458 --> 00:21:34,002 but it appears that dad's grill will be okay. 335 00:21:34,085 --> 00:21:36,671 Uh, no. My other scooter broke again. 336 00:21:36,755 --> 00:21:40,342 This is a new one. Parker Paste is a total bust. 337 00:21:42,427 --> 00:21:45,597 But I did make some adjustments to my metal detector. 338 00:21:45,680 --> 00:21:47,349 Now it detects fear. 339 00:21:48,350 --> 00:21:51,478 [MIMICS BEEPING] 340 00:21:52,771 --> 00:21:55,690 Uh, hey, guys, does it look like rain? 341 00:21:55,774 --> 00:21:59,652 Sure does. Cancel the barbecue. Everyone inside. Everyone inside. 342 00:22:00,362 --> 00:22:01,613 What are you talking about? 343 00:22:01,696 --> 00:22:05,450 You're about to taste what a $2000 grill can do to a piece of meat. 344 00:22:05,533 --> 00:22:07,869 It cost how much? 345 00:22:08,453 --> 00:22:12,540 Let's not get sidetracked. Time to take a look at these bad boys. 346 00:22:19,381 --> 00:22:21,257 How did this happen?