1
00:00:01,137 --> 00:00:03,104
Geez, I can't believe we found
a version of Earth
2
00:00:03,139 --> 00:00:05,306
with a "Ball Fondlers"
movie franchise.
3
00:00:05,341 --> 00:00:08,576
I can't believe the things
this reality considers PG-13.
4
00:00:08,611 --> 00:00:11,312
- Yeah. I-I'm pretty jealous.
- Don't be, Morty.
5
00:00:11,347 --> 00:00:14,215
There's pros and cons to [Burps]
every alternate timeline
6
00:00:14,250 --> 00:00:15,483
fun facts about this one--
7
00:00:15,518 --> 00:00:18,353
It's got giant, telepathic
spiders, 11 9/11s,
8
00:00:18,387 --> 00:00:22,433
and the best ice cream
in the multiverse!
9
00:00:22,468 --> 00:00:25,003
- Shut up!
- We go get some ice cream, mother[bleep]!
10
00:00:25,037 --> 00:00:26,971
[Engine sputters]
11
00:00:27,006 --> 00:00:28,306
Oh, great.
12
00:00:28,374 --> 00:00:29,908
Oh, boy.
W-what's wrong, Rick?
13
00:00:29,942 --> 00:00:31,743
Is it the quantum carburetor
or something?
14
00:00:31,777 --> 00:00:33,878
"Quantum carburetor"?
Jesus, Morty.
15
00:00:33,913 --> 00:00:35,547
You can't just add
a [burps]--
16
00:00:35,581 --> 00:00:37,849
Sci-Fi word to a car word
and hope it means something.
17
00:00:37,883 --> 00:00:40,323
Huh, looks like something's wrong
with the microverse battery.
18
00:00:40,352 --> 00:00:43,588
- We're gonna have to go inside.
- Um, go inside what?
19
00:00:43,622 --> 00:00:45,456
The battery, Morty.
Be right back, Summer.
20
00:00:45,524 --> 00:00:46,891
Stay put,
don't touch any buttons,
21
00:00:46,959 --> 00:00:50,328
and ignore all random thoughts
that feel... spidery.
22
00:00:50,362 --> 00:00:51,763
Wait!
You can't leave me here!
23
00:00:51,797 --> 00:00:54,499
You'll be fine.
Ship, keep Summer safe.
24
00:00:54,533 --> 00:00:56,501
FEMALE VOICE: [Warbles]
Keep Summer safe.
25
00:00:56,535 --> 00:00:57,669
Ohh!
26
00:00:59,471 --> 00:01:01,039
Ugh.
Wonderful.
27
00:01:05,477 --> 00:01:07,512
Hey, excuse me.
Hello.
28
00:01:07,580 --> 00:01:09,581
Um...
[Cellphone clicking]
29
00:01:09,615 --> 00:01:11,583
What, you think
you're better than me?!
30
00:01:11,617 --> 00:01:13,651
Nobody's better than me!
31
00:01:13,686 --> 00:01:14,886
Hey!
Hey!
32
00:01:19,124 --> 00:01:20,925
Aah!
Aaaaah!
33
00:01:20,960 --> 00:01:22,460
- FEMALE VOICE: Keep Summer safe.
- Aaaaaaah!
34
00:01:22,528 --> 00:01:23,728
Hey, man, what the hell?!
35
00:01:23,796 --> 00:01:25,830
That was my daughter's
pediatrician! Aah!
36
00:01:25,865 --> 00:01:27,632
No, stop!
Don't kill him!
37
00:01:27,666 --> 00:01:28,967
[Beep]
Confirmed.
38
00:01:29,001 --> 00:01:30,468
[Grunts]
Aah!
39
00:01:30,536 --> 00:01:31,636
[Groans]
40
00:01:31,670 --> 00:01:33,338
Oh, God.
I can't feel my legs.
41
00:01:33,372 --> 00:01:34,606
Help!
Help!!
42
00:01:34,640 --> 00:01:37,342
- Summer is safe.
- I don't feel safe.
43
00:01:37,376 --> 00:01:39,043
[Sobs]
Confirmed.
44
00:01:39,111 --> 00:01:41,412
[Light jazz music plays]
[Sobbing] No.
45
00:01:41,480 --> 00:01:42,981
Oh, God, help me.
Help me!
46
00:01:43,015 --> 00:01:44,983
[Sobbing] Help me, please!
You can help me!
47
00:01:45,017 --> 00:01:48,052
♪♪
48
00:02:10,476 --> 00:02:16,476
Sync & corrections by XhmikosR
www.addic7ed.com
49
00:02:18,384 --> 00:02:20,385
Oh, man.
Where are we, Rick?
50
00:02:20,419 --> 00:02:21,819
Morty, remember
eight seconds ago
51
00:02:21,854 --> 00:02:23,454
when [Burps] when you said,
"Go inside what?"
52
00:02:23,489 --> 00:02:24,923
And I said, "The battery"?
53
00:02:24,957 --> 00:02:26,624
And then we showed up here,
and I wasn't like,
54
00:02:26,692 --> 00:02:27,892
"Whoa, this is unexpected.
55
00:02:27,960 --> 00:02:29,894
This is not what I was
expecting, Morty.
56
00:02:29,962 --> 00:02:31,529
- What a perplexing mystery this is."
- All right, all right.
57
00:02:31,597 --> 00:02:33,464
We're inside the battery.
I get it.
58
00:02:33,499 --> 00:02:35,500
- You don't have to bust my balls.
- Huh, this isn't right.
59
00:02:35,534 --> 00:02:36,868
This pipe's supposed
to be sending
60
00:02:36,902 --> 00:02:39,671
20 terawatts of juice
up to the engine, Morty.
61
00:02:39,705 --> 00:02:41,506
[Computer beeps]
Instead we've got... zero?
62
00:02:41,540 --> 00:02:42,807
Now what
are these people doing?
63
00:02:42,841 --> 00:02:45,143
W-w-w-whoa, people?
[Groans]
64
00:02:45,177 --> 00:02:46,844
It's time for some
hands-on engine repair.
65
00:02:46,912 --> 00:02:49,647
- All right, Morty, hold on to something.
- Whoa!
66
00:02:52,017 --> 00:02:53,518
Holy crap!
67
00:02:53,552 --> 00:02:54,819
I thought we were inside
your car battery, Rick.
68
00:02:54,853 --> 00:02:58,089
T-t-this is like a whole
p-planet or something.
69
00:02:58,123 --> 00:03:00,024
Thanks, Morty. I'm pretty proud
of this bad boy.
70
00:03:00,059 --> 00:03:01,426
Check it out.
[Keypad beeps]
71
00:03:01,493 --> 00:03:05,430
I put a spatially tessellated void
inside a modified temporal field
72
00:03:05,497 --> 00:03:07,865
until a planet developed
intelligent life.
73
00:03:07,900 --> 00:03:10,902
I then introduced that life
to the wonders of electricity,
74
00:03:10,970 --> 00:03:12,837
which they now generate
on a global scale.
75
00:03:12,871 --> 00:03:14,706
And, you know, some of it goes
to power my engine
76
00:03:14,740 --> 00:03:15,974
and charge my phone and stuff.
77
00:03:16,009 --> 00:03:18,509
You have a whole planet sitting
around making your power for you?
78
00:03:18,544 --> 00:03:19,811
That's slavery.
79
00:03:19,845 --> 00:03:21,980
It's society.
They work for each other, Morty.
80
00:03:22,014 --> 00:03:23,915
They pay each other.
They buy houses.
81
00:03:23,949 --> 00:03:25,650
They get married
and make children
82
00:03:25,684 --> 00:03:27,085
that replace them when they get
too old to make power.
83
00:03:27,119 --> 00:03:29,187
That just sounds like slavery
with extra steps.
84
00:03:29,221 --> 00:03:32,156
Ooh-la-la, someone's
gonna get laid in college.
85
00:03:32,191 --> 00:03:34,559
ANCHOR: It appears we are
being revisited
86
00:03:34,593 --> 00:03:37,495
by the alien known as Rick,
who once gave our world
87
00:03:37,529 --> 00:03:39,597
the gift of gooble box
technology,
88
00:03:39,631 --> 00:03:42,133
which, when stomped on,
generates electricity,
89
00:03:42,167 --> 00:03:43,801
powering our homes
and businesses,
90
00:03:43,836 --> 00:03:45,503
improving our daily lives,
while safely removing
91
00:03:45,537 --> 00:03:50,108
the dangerous waste power
to a special disposal volcano.
92
00:03:50,175 --> 00:03:51,809
But why has Rick returned?
93
00:03:51,844 --> 00:03:54,445
And what will he say
when he hears the big news?
94
00:03:54,480 --> 00:03:56,080
Let's find out.
95
00:03:56,115 --> 00:03:58,483
You need to tell these people
they're in a battery, Rick.
96
00:03:58,550 --> 00:04:00,985
It's messed up.
There's caterers down there.
97
00:04:01,020 --> 00:04:03,187
Th-th-they're setting up
chafing dishes.
98
00:04:03,222 --> 00:04:04,279
Would you relax, Morty?
99
00:04:04,304 --> 00:04:06,624
There's nothing dishonest
about what we're doing.
100
00:04:06,658 --> 00:04:08,192
Now slap on these antennae.
101
00:04:08,227 --> 00:04:10,094
- These people need to think we're aliens.
- What? Why?
102
00:04:10,129 --> 00:04:14,032
Obviously [burps] you really [burps]
know nothing about car repair.
103
00:04:15,801 --> 00:04:18,102
[Fanfare plays]
104
00:04:18,137 --> 00:04:20,138
Wait for the ramp, Morty.
105
00:04:20,172 --> 00:04:21,806
They love the slow ramp.
106
00:04:21,874 --> 00:04:24,709
Really gets their dicks hard
when they see this ramp
107
00:04:24,777 --> 00:04:27,011
just slowly extending down.
108
00:04:27,046 --> 00:04:28,813
[Cheering]
109
00:04:28,847 --> 00:04:31,282
Greetings!
[Creatures chanting, "Rick! Rick!"]
110
00:04:32,751 --> 00:04:34,218
Morty, you got
to flip them off.
111
00:04:34,286 --> 00:04:36,220
I told them it means
"Peace among worlds."
112
00:04:36,288 --> 00:04:37,588
How hilarious is that?
113
00:04:42,094 --> 00:04:43,995
[Creatures cheering wildly]
114
00:04:44,029 --> 00:04:45,229
RICK: Coming through.
115
00:04:45,264 --> 00:04:47,498
Two real aliens walking
through here.
116
00:04:47,566 --> 00:04:49,500
Rick, our alien friend.
117
00:04:49,568 --> 00:04:51,669
Uh, Mr. President,
um, couldn't help but notice
118
00:04:51,703 --> 00:04:53,838
that you were having problems
generating power.
119
00:04:53,872 --> 00:04:56,207
That's correct. [Chuckles]
We've evolved.
120
00:04:56,241 --> 00:04:59,677
Our most brilliant scientist,
Zeep Xanflorp,
121
00:04:59,711 --> 00:05:01,512
has developed
a source of energy
122
00:05:01,547 --> 00:05:03,281
that makes gooble boxes
obsolete.
123
00:05:04,783 --> 00:05:06,017
[Straining]
I would love to see it.
124
00:05:06,051 --> 00:05:08,786
[Bleep] you.
What did you say to me?!
125
00:05:08,821 --> 00:05:09,921
"[Bleep] you."
126
00:05:09,988 --> 00:05:12,790
Y-you told me
it means "much obliged".
127
00:05:12,825 --> 00:05:15,860
Oh. Right.
Uh, b-blow me.
128
00:05:15,894 --> 00:05:17,595
No, no, no.
Blow me.
129
00:05:21,834 --> 00:05:25,903
Zeep, you have an honored guest
from beyond the stars.
130
00:05:25,938 --> 00:05:28,858
I said 12 quantum stabilizers,
not 11.
131
00:05:28,882 --> 00:05:30,582
Fix it or it's your ass.
132
00:05:30,628 --> 00:05:32,161
Chris, I'm in the middle
of something.
133
00:05:32,196 --> 00:05:35,531
Zeep, is Rick--
The alien.
134
00:05:35,566 --> 00:05:37,033
Rick the alien.
135
00:05:37,067 --> 00:05:39,435
Rick the alien...
136
00:05:39,470 --> 00:05:41,037
Really?
You're gonna pull that move?
137
00:05:41,071 --> 00:05:42,739
I guided
your entire civilization.
138
00:05:42,773 --> 00:05:44,841
Your people have
a holiday named Ricksgiving.
139
00:05:44,875 --> 00:05:46,476
They teach kids
about me in school.
140
00:05:46,510 --> 00:05:47,677
I dropped out of school.
141
00:05:47,711 --> 00:05:49,045
It's not a place
for smart people.
142
00:05:49,079 --> 00:05:50,947
Ohhhh, snap!
143
00:05:50,981 --> 00:05:52,882
Listen to me,
you arrogant little--
144
00:05:52,916 --> 00:05:56,052
[Chuckling] R-Rick was hoping
to see your new energy source.
145
00:05:56,086 --> 00:05:59,088
I think he could learn
a lot from you, Zeep.
146
00:05:59,123 --> 00:06:00,590
Fine.
147
00:06:00,624 --> 00:06:02,692
It's hard for people to grasp,
148
00:06:02,726 --> 00:06:05,695
but inside that container is
an infinite universe
149
00:06:05,729 --> 00:06:09,132
with a planet capable of generating
massive amounts of power.
150
00:06:09,166 --> 00:06:11,501
I call it a miniverse.
151
00:06:11,535 --> 00:06:13,569
[Coughs]
Dumb [coughs] name.
152
00:06:13,637 --> 00:06:14,971
- Excuse me?
- [Clears throat] Nothing.
153
00:06:15,005 --> 00:06:17,140
I mean, it's hard
for us to comprehend all this.
154
00:06:17,174 --> 00:06:19,876
Would it be possible
for us to get some kind of tour
155
00:06:19,910 --> 00:06:21,744
of your miniverse
from the inside?
156
00:06:21,779 --> 00:06:23,701
This isn't a [bleep]
chocolate factory.
157
00:06:23,726 --> 00:06:24,614
I don't have time.
158
00:06:24,648 --> 00:06:27,150
Didn't you say time goes
more slowly in the miniverse
159
00:06:27,184 --> 00:06:28,651
relative to the real world?
160
00:06:28,686 --> 00:06:31,020
Yes, Chris.
Thanks for reminding me of that.
161
00:06:31,055 --> 00:06:33,556
Great president.
All right, let's go.
162
00:06:33,590 --> 00:06:35,091
Whoa-oh!
163
00:06:35,159 --> 00:06:36,259
Hold on to something.
164
00:06:37,811 --> 00:06:40,012
I put an unbounded vacuum
inside a temporal field
165
00:06:40,047 --> 00:06:41,614
until a world developed.
166
00:06:41,648 --> 00:06:43,583
I then introduced
the people of this world
167
00:06:43,617 --> 00:06:46,853
to the wonders of electricity
in the form of a device
168
00:06:46,887 --> 00:06:48,588
I call a flooble crank.
169
00:06:48,622 --> 00:06:50,022
ZEEP:
What they don't know is
170
00:06:50,057 --> 00:06:53,192
that 80% of every crank's
energy output gets channeled
171
00:06:53,260 --> 00:06:55,728
out of the miniverse
to be used by us.
172
00:06:55,796 --> 00:06:57,296
No more gooble boxes.
173
00:06:57,331 --> 00:06:59,265
RICK: I got to tell you, Zeep,
with no disrespect,
174
00:06:59,299 --> 00:07:01,667
I really think what
you're doing here is unethical.
175
00:07:01,702 --> 00:07:03,136
- It's not cool.
- What?!
176
00:07:03,170 --> 00:07:06,105
Y-y-you got the people
on this world slaving away
177
00:07:06,140 --> 00:07:07,840
[burps] making your power.
178
00:07:07,875 --> 00:07:09,342
I mean,
that's what I call slavery.
179
00:07:09,376 --> 00:07:11,277
No, no, no,
they work for each other
180
00:07:11,311 --> 00:07:13,546
in exchange for money,
which they then--
181
00:07:13,580 --> 00:07:16,749
Well, that just sounds like
slavery with extra steps.
182
00:07:16,784 --> 00:07:20,586
Eek barba dirkle, somebody's
gonna get laid in college.
183
00:07:20,621 --> 00:07:21,888
Rick, a word?
184
00:07:21,922 --> 00:07:23,022
What the hell was that?
185
00:07:23,056 --> 00:07:24,824
I know.
"Eek barba dirkle"?
186
00:07:24,858 --> 00:07:26,626
That's a pretty
[bleep] up "ooh-la-la".
187
00:07:26,660 --> 00:07:28,294
No, what are you doing
telling this guy
188
00:07:28,328 --> 00:07:29,962
that his miniverse is
unethical?
189
00:07:29,997 --> 00:07:32,098
Do you not see
the hypocrisy here?
190
00:07:32,132 --> 00:07:34,000
Holy crap.
You're right, Morty.
191
00:07:34,067 --> 00:07:35,601
Hypocrisy.
192
00:07:35,636 --> 00:07:37,737
Somewhere on this planet,
there's got to be
193
00:07:37,771 --> 00:07:40,039
an arrogant scientist prick on the
verge of microverse technology,
194
00:07:40,107 --> 00:07:42,341
which would threaten to make
Zeep's flooble cranks obsolete,
195
00:07:42,376 --> 00:07:44,143
forcing Zeep to say
microverses are bad,
196
00:07:44,178 --> 00:07:47,046
at which point he'll realize
what a hypocrite he's being,
197
00:07:47,080 --> 00:07:49,982
his people will go back to
stomping on their gooble boxes,
198
00:07:50,017 --> 00:07:52,351
and you and I will be
on ice cream street, baby!
199
00:07:52,386 --> 00:07:54,187
Eating that mother[bleep]
ice cream!
200
00:07:54,221 --> 00:07:56,188
Slurping, slurping,
slurping it up.
201
00:07:56,990 --> 00:07:58,391
Wh-wh-why are you making
that face?
202
00:07:58,425 --> 00:07:59,859
Holy [bleep]!
203
00:07:59,893 --> 00:08:00,949
It's me.
204
00:08:00,974 --> 00:08:02,995
I've convinced the people of
this planet that I'm a traveler
205
00:08:03,029 --> 00:08:03,996
from another world.
206
00:08:04,031 --> 00:08:05,998
You don't think that's
over[Burps]doing it a little?
207
00:08:06,033 --> 00:08:07,667
I mean, you could achieve
the same effect
208
00:08:07,701 --> 00:08:08,968
with a pair of--
Never mind.
209
00:08:09,002 --> 00:08:10,403
You know what?
I shouldn't be so critical.
210
00:08:10,437 --> 00:08:11,804
I'm an alien.
211
00:08:11,839 --> 00:08:13,840
Places, please.
We're about to land.
212
00:08:17,177 --> 00:08:19,745
[Coughs]
Too fast.
213
00:08:19,813 --> 00:08:22,315
[Sirens wailing]
SUMMER: [Whimpering]
214
00:08:22,382 --> 00:08:25,718
FEMALE VOICE: Law enforcement
converging on location.
215
00:08:25,752 --> 00:08:26,986
Keep Summer safe.
216
00:08:27,020 --> 00:08:29,388
No! No, no!
Don't hurt anybody!
217
00:08:29,423 --> 00:08:32,391
[Warble]
Confirm custom defense protocol--
218
00:08:32,426 --> 00:08:35,194
Keep Summer safe--
No physical force.
219
00:08:35,229 --> 00:08:37,512
- Yes.
- Processing.
220
00:08:37,547 --> 00:08:40,282
MAN: Come out of the vehicle
with your hands in the air!
221
00:08:40,316 --> 00:08:42,050
Scanning assailants.
222
00:08:42,084 --> 00:08:44,953
[Warbling, beeping]
223
00:08:44,987 --> 00:08:47,389
Psychological option detected.
224
00:08:47,423 --> 00:08:49,491
[Beeping]
Gestating.
225
00:08:49,525 --> 00:08:50,859
"Gestating"?
226
00:08:50,893 --> 00:08:54,462
Come out with your hands up,
or we will be forced to open fire!
227
00:08:55,631 --> 00:08:57,260
- Incoming!
- We got a device!
228
00:08:57,285 --> 00:08:58,414
Bomb! Bomb!
229
00:09:01,304 --> 00:09:02,504
Daddy?
230
00:09:02,538 --> 00:09:04,506
Oh, my God.
[Sighs]
231
00:09:04,540 --> 00:09:06,174
- Hunter?
- Daddy?
232
00:09:06,208 --> 00:09:07,943
What the hell?
233
00:09:07,977 --> 00:09:10,278
[Gasps] Jesus Christ,
cease fire! Stay back!
234
00:09:10,313 --> 00:09:11,446
H-h-hunter?
235
00:09:11,480 --> 00:09:13,248
- Daddy.
- Hunter!
236
00:09:13,282 --> 00:09:15,250
[Sobbing] Oh, my dear,
sweet God, Hunter.
237
00:09:15,284 --> 00:09:16,585
Oh, my boy.
My boy.
238
00:09:16,652 --> 00:09:19,054
I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
It was all my fault.
239
00:09:19,088 --> 00:09:21,256
- I'm sorry.
- Daddy, leave the car alone.
240
00:09:21,290 --> 00:09:22,424
W-w-w-what?
241
00:09:22,491 --> 00:09:24,526
[Distorted]
Leave the car alone.
242
00:09:24,560 --> 00:09:26,194
Hunter?
Don't--
243
00:09:26,228 --> 00:09:27,329
Oh, my God.
244
00:09:27,363 --> 00:09:29,631
Stay here, Hunter!
No!
245
00:09:29,665 --> 00:09:32,567
[Sobbing] God, no!
Hunter!
246
00:09:34,070 --> 00:09:36,371
FEMALE VOICE:
All of you have loved ones.
247
00:09:36,405 --> 00:09:39,007
All can be returned.
All can be taken away.
248
00:09:39,075 --> 00:09:41,309
Please step away
from the vehicle.
249
00:09:42,278 --> 00:09:44,613
Keep Summer safe.
250
00:09:44,647 --> 00:09:47,415
And if you continue
to turn your flooble cranks,
251
00:09:47,483 --> 00:09:50,118
I will bring you
other great alien advancements.
252
00:09:50,152 --> 00:09:52,454
- Hey, uh, let me ask you something.
- Yes?
253
00:09:52,488 --> 00:09:55,056
Any of your, uh, scientists
working on anything new?
254
00:09:55,124 --> 00:09:56,591
All of them.
That's their job.
255
00:09:56,626 --> 00:09:59,060
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
But I mean, like, energy-wise.
256
00:09:59,128 --> 00:10:01,496
Anyone working on, say,
a little universe in a box?
257
00:10:01,530 --> 00:10:03,632
How do you know about that?
It's top secret.
258
00:10:03,699 --> 00:10:07,569
ZEEP: So remember-- a crank
a day is not nearly enough.
259
00:10:07,603 --> 00:10:09,270
[Laughs]
Crank it.
260
00:10:09,338 --> 00:10:12,107
I told them this means
"Peace among worlds".
261
00:10:12,141 --> 00:10:15,210
- How hilarious is that?
- Re-really funny, Zeep.
262
00:10:15,244 --> 00:10:17,579
Hey, Zeep, the fake president
of your fake world
263
00:10:17,613 --> 00:10:19,681
has something fake important
to show you.
264
00:10:22,151 --> 00:10:23,052
It's not much now,
265
00:10:23,077 --> 00:10:25,454
but once I learn to accelerate
the temporal field,
266
00:10:25,488 --> 00:10:27,622
I'll be able to interact
with any sentient life
267
00:10:27,657 --> 00:10:29,457
that evolves and introduce them
268
00:10:29,492 --> 00:10:32,227
to the wonders of electricity
via a pulley-based device
269
00:10:32,294 --> 00:10:33,495
I call a blooble yank.
270
00:10:33,529 --> 00:10:35,897
But what
they won't know is--
271
00:10:35,965 --> 00:10:37,666
You'll be taking
most of their energy.
272
00:10:37,700 --> 00:10:39,234
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I get it.
273
00:10:39,268 --> 00:10:41,603
[Burps]
It's show[Burps]time.
274
00:10:45,374 --> 00:10:48,943
You do realize this will make
the flooble crank obsolete?
275
00:10:48,978 --> 00:10:52,280
This is wrong, Kyle.
What you're doing is wrong.
276
00:10:52,348 --> 00:10:54,582
You're basically--
This is slavery.
277
00:10:54,617 --> 00:10:57,118
You're talking about creating
a planet of slaves.
278
00:10:57,153 --> 00:11:00,455
- [Burps] Told you, Zeep.
- Oh, they won't be slaves.
279
00:11:00,489 --> 00:11:02,624
They'll work for each other
and pay each other money.
280
00:11:02,658 --> 00:11:07,696
That just sounds like slavery
with ex... tra... steps.
281
00:11:07,730 --> 00:11:09,497
- What?
- Wait a minute.
282
00:11:09,532 --> 00:11:12,167
Did you create my universe?
Is my universe a miniverse?
283
00:11:12,234 --> 00:11:14,502
- Microverse!
- Uh, teenyverse.
284
00:11:14,537 --> 00:11:16,337
Ugh!
You bastard!
285
00:11:16,405 --> 00:11:18,473
Much obliged.
286
00:11:18,497 --> 00:11:20,997
- What the hell is happening?
- This is healthy, trust me.
287
00:11:21,177 --> 00:11:23,011
You're my battery, mother[bleep].
288
00:11:23,045 --> 00:11:24,312
[Groans]
That's all you are.
289
00:11:24,346 --> 00:11:26,314
I made you.
Your microverse sucks!
290
00:11:26,338 --> 00:11:28,938
And your miniverse is the size
of a [bleep] lobster tank!
291
00:11:28,962 --> 00:11:29,718
It's whack!
292
00:11:29,719 --> 00:11:32,020
Are they not really aliens?
293
00:11:32,088 --> 00:11:36,191
Nah, they're just a couple of crazy,
wacky scientists, you know?
294
00:11:36,225 --> 00:11:37,592
So he made a universe,
295
00:11:37,626 --> 00:11:39,294
and that guy is
from that universe.
296
00:11:39,328 --> 00:11:41,629
And that guy made a universe.
297
00:11:41,664 --> 00:11:45,233
And that's the universe
where I was born.
298
00:11:45,267 --> 00:11:47,469
Where my father died.
299
00:11:47,503 --> 00:11:49,704
Where I couldn't make time
for his funeral
300
00:11:49,772 --> 00:11:54,209
because I was working
on my universe.
301
00:11:54,243 --> 00:11:56,010
- I made you!
- [Laughs] Yeah.
302
00:11:56,045 --> 00:11:57,712
Science, huh?
Ain't it a thing.
303
00:11:57,747 --> 00:12:00,048
You know, one time,
Rick sh-- accidentally shot
304
00:12:00,082 --> 00:12:01,683
his laser pistol
right through my hand.
305
00:12:01,717 --> 00:12:05,286
You know, I mean, like,
old-lady science, you know?
306
00:12:05,321 --> 00:12:07,122
She's a real--
307
00:12:07,156 --> 00:12:08,456
You got to hang on tight,
you know?
308
00:12:08,491 --> 00:12:11,292
Because she-- she'll--
She bucks pretty hard.
309
00:12:11,327 --> 00:12:14,329
Ooh, boy, what--
Oh, my God, no!
310
00:12:19,301 --> 00:12:20,435
- Teenyverse.
- Teenyverse.
311
00:12:22,152 --> 00:12:24,119
Come on, come on, come on.
312
00:12:24,154 --> 00:12:25,254
Pterodactyl!
313
00:12:25,989 --> 00:12:27,290
[Laughs]
Asshole!
314
00:12:27,324 --> 00:12:28,925
When I get
out of this teenyverse,
315
00:12:28,959 --> 00:12:30,827
I'm gonna smash it to pieces
with you in it.
316
00:12:30,861 --> 00:12:32,562
Yeah, well, when I get
out of this teenyverse,
317
00:12:32,596 --> 00:12:34,430
I'm gonna get out of
the surrounding miniverse
318
00:12:34,465 --> 00:12:36,399
and then the microverse
around that, and guess what?
319
00:12:36,433 --> 00:12:37,900
Don't make things worse, Rick!
320
00:12:37,935 --> 00:12:39,902
Uh, he's not gonna destroy
your universe.
321
00:12:39,937 --> 00:12:41,904
You know, we--
We need it to start our car.
322
00:12:41,939 --> 00:12:44,273
That's what you used
my universe for?
323
00:12:44,308 --> 00:12:45,942
To run your car?
324
00:12:45,976 --> 00:12:47,343
Yeah, but don't
flatter yourself.
325
00:12:47,378 --> 00:12:50,079
There's always AAA,
you [bleep] [bleep]sucker!
326
00:12:51,148 --> 00:12:53,015
What's he doing?
What's he crafting?
327
00:12:53,050 --> 00:12:54,517
I can craft stuff, too, pal!
328
00:12:54,551 --> 00:12:56,386
Just like I crafted
your reality!
329
00:12:57,654 --> 00:12:59,055
You crafty son of a--
330
00:12:59,089 --> 00:13:00,289
Ow!
331
00:13:00,324 --> 00:13:03,926
I crafted the guy that created
the planet you're standing on!
332
00:13:03,961 --> 00:13:06,362
Yeah, and I made the stars that became
the carbon in your mother's ovaries!
333
00:13:06,397 --> 00:13:08,164
I didn't ask to be born!
334
00:13:08,198 --> 00:13:09,599
All right, that's it!
I'm out.
335
00:13:09,633 --> 00:13:11,467
I-I'm gonna go
into the wilderness,
336
00:13:11,502 --> 00:13:14,470
and I'm gonna make a new life for
myself among the tree people.
337
00:13:14,505 --> 00:13:16,906
- It can't be worse than this.
- RICK: Sure. Okay, Morty.
338
00:13:16,940 --> 00:13:19,342
Just be back before sundown
or the tree people will eat you.
339
00:13:19,409 --> 00:13:20,376
That's a myth!
340
00:13:20,411 --> 00:13:22,311
W-w-why are you trying
to start a myth?
341
00:13:22,346 --> 00:13:23,880
It's a prehistoric planet, Morty.
342
00:13:23,947 --> 00:13:25,448
Someone has to bring
a little culture.
343
00:13:25,482 --> 00:13:27,116
And it certainly can't be someone
344
00:13:27,151 --> 00:13:30,286
whose entire culture powers
my brake lights!
345
00:13:30,354 --> 00:13:32,388
[Sirens wailing]
346
00:13:32,923 --> 00:13:34,856
Go, go, go!
347
00:13:35,856 --> 00:13:37,857
Oh, my God.
Oh, God.
348
00:13:37,881 --> 00:13:39,581
What are we going to do now?
349
00:13:39,592 --> 00:13:42,427
FEMALE VOICE: I am unable
to destroy this army.
350
00:13:42,461 --> 00:13:45,864
To clarify, I am quite able
to destroy this army,
351
00:13:45,898 --> 00:13:48,132
- but you will not permit it.
- Correct.
352
00:13:48,200 --> 00:13:51,502
You also refuse to authorize
emotional countermeasures.
353
00:13:51,537 --> 00:13:54,505
If you're talking
about the melting ghost babies,
354
00:13:54,540 --> 00:13:56,474
yes, please, no more of that.
355
00:13:56,508 --> 00:13:58,476
[Warble]
Confirmed.
356
00:13:58,536 --> 00:14:01,536
I am currently constructing
a security measure
357
00:14:01,547 --> 00:14:03,414
in compliance
with your parameters.
358
00:14:03,449 --> 00:14:06,751
But I do want to say
you are not making this easy.
359
00:14:06,819 --> 00:14:08,353
You know you're
kind of a dick, right?
360
00:14:08,387 --> 00:14:11,389
My function is
to keep Summer safe,
361
00:14:11,423 --> 00:14:14,525
not keep Summer being,
like, totally stoked
362
00:14:14,560 --> 00:14:17,462
about, like,
the general vibe and stuff.
363
00:14:17,496 --> 00:14:20,164
That's you.
That's how you talk.
364
00:14:23,702 --> 00:14:26,171
Hey, that's my deer!
365
00:14:27,706 --> 00:14:29,174
Aaaaaaah!
366
00:14:29,208 --> 00:14:30,508
Raah!
367
00:14:30,576 --> 00:14:33,611
I hope your God is
as big a dick as you.
368
00:14:36,649 --> 00:14:39,250
My God's the biggest dick
that's never existed.
369
00:14:39,285 --> 00:14:41,152
Why do you think I'm even here?
370
00:14:41,187 --> 00:14:43,530
[Snake hisses]
371
00:14:43,532 --> 00:14:45,198
[Eagle screeches]
You're here
372
00:14:45,233 --> 00:14:47,401
because you created
someone smarter than you.
373
00:14:49,804 --> 00:14:53,373
Oh, I thought we were both here because
I created a universe of idiots.
374
00:14:59,847 --> 00:15:02,449
Kalo kada sha la.
375
00:15:02,483 --> 00:15:03,583
Holy shit.
Morty?
376
00:15:03,618 --> 00:15:05,252
I haven't seen you in months.
377
00:15:05,286 --> 00:15:06,820
You're leading the tree people?
378
00:15:06,854 --> 00:15:08,288
Huh.
That's a step up.
379
00:15:08,322 --> 00:15:09,489
We have no leaders.
380
00:15:09,557 --> 00:15:12,125
We follow
only the will of the forest.
381
00:15:12,160 --> 00:15:13,293
Ooh. Wow.
382
00:15:13,327 --> 00:15:16,363
- Gaaaaay.
- That is pretty gay.
383
00:15:16,397 --> 00:15:18,231
You two call yourselves
geniuses,
384
00:15:18,266 --> 00:15:20,867
but you have spent
this time learning nothing.
385
00:15:20,902 --> 00:15:22,769
Come with me into the forest.
386
00:15:22,804 --> 00:15:25,338
There is something
I wish to teach you.
387
00:15:28,743 --> 00:15:32,379
This is ku'ala,
the spirit tree.
388
00:15:32,413 --> 00:15:34,347
For generations,
it has guided the--
389
00:15:35,550 --> 00:15:37,684
You have to get us
the [bleep] out of here.
390
00:15:37,718 --> 00:15:39,553
These people are
backwards savages.
391
00:15:39,587 --> 00:15:41,188
They eat every third baby
392
00:15:41,222 --> 00:15:43,356
because they think
it makes fruit grow bigger.
393
00:15:43,391 --> 00:15:45,892
Everyone's gross, and they all
smell like piss all the time.
394
00:15:45,927 --> 00:15:48,495
I m-- I miss my family.
I miss my laptop.
395
00:15:48,563 --> 00:15:51,765
I masturbated to an extra-curvy
piece of driftwood the other day!
396
00:15:51,799 --> 00:15:53,500
Look, I don't care
what it takes.
397
00:15:53,534 --> 00:15:55,202
You two are putting aside
your bull[bleep],
398
00:15:55,236 --> 00:15:57,571
and you're working together
to get us back home.
399
00:15:57,605 --> 00:15:59,506
No can do, Morty.
I just can't.
400
00:15:59,540 --> 00:16:01,341
I just don't see how I can--
401
00:16:01,375 --> 00:16:02,642
Ro ro dah no gah!
402
00:16:02,677 --> 00:16:05,412
You're smart.
You'll figure it out.
403
00:16:05,446 --> 00:16:09,549
[Guns cocking] You have 10
seconds to get out of the ship!
404
00:16:09,584 --> 00:16:11,485
10, 9...
405
00:16:12,487 --> 00:16:13,753
All right, not bad.
406
00:16:13,788 --> 00:16:15,856
I guess you're
an okay proto recombinator.
407
00:16:15,923 --> 00:16:18,458
I've certainly seen
worse ionic cell dioxination.
408
00:16:18,493 --> 00:16:20,160
If this works,
drinks are on me.
409
00:16:20,194 --> 00:16:21,862
If drinks are on you,
you're gonna need
410
00:16:21,929 --> 00:16:23,597
a second mortgage
on that tower.
411
00:16:23,631 --> 00:16:25,132
I'm an alcoholic.
412
00:16:25,199 --> 00:16:26,700
Opium addict.
413
00:16:26,734 --> 00:16:28,902
[Both laugh]
414
00:16:28,936 --> 00:16:31,538
All right, okay, okay,
okay, wrap it up.
415
00:16:31,606 --> 00:16:34,441
You guys are the [bleep] worst!
Your gods are a lie!
416
00:16:34,509 --> 00:16:36,943
[Bleep] you, [bleep] nature,
and [bleep] trees!
417
00:16:39,514 --> 00:16:40,747
Yes! You did it!
Yes!
418
00:16:40,781 --> 00:16:42,516
Hey, uh, how about that drink?
419
00:16:42,550 --> 00:16:45,619
Sure, I just need to go grab
my wallet from inside my ship.
420
00:16:45,653 --> 00:16:47,187
Isour wallet in your ship?
421
00:16:47,255 --> 00:16:50,223
That's where the transporter is,
too, so why don't we come with?
422
00:16:50,258 --> 00:16:53,437
It's cool.
I'll be back in a sec.
423
00:16:53,472 --> 00:16:56,941
You know how long a second can
take in a microverse?
424
00:16:56,975 --> 00:16:58,976
Oh!
Run, Morty!
425
00:16:59,011 --> 00:17:01,312
That asshole's willing to risk everything
he cares about just to defeat me!
426
00:17:01,346 --> 00:17:02,480
He's psychotic!
427
00:17:02,547 --> 00:17:03,748
[Both pant]
428
00:17:05,384 --> 00:17:07,685
- Morty, hop on my back.
- Why?
429
00:17:07,719 --> 00:17:10,054
Go, go [Burps]
Sanchez ski shoes.
430
00:17:11,757 --> 00:17:13,891
Aaaaaah!
...Eight...
431
00:17:13,926 --> 00:17:14,992
[Panting]
432
00:17:15,027 --> 00:17:16,327
Aaaah!
Oof!
433
00:17:16,395 --> 00:17:17,695
[All grunting]
434
00:17:17,729 --> 00:17:19,697
Hold still.
[Grunts]
435
00:17:20,999 --> 00:17:24,669
Oh, hey, guys. I just
finished cooking us a feast.
436
00:17:24,703 --> 00:17:26,470
Aaaah!
Holy--
437
00:17:26,505 --> 00:17:28,673
- You monster!
- Whoa. Bad tour.
438
00:17:28,707 --> 00:17:30,374
...seven...
439
00:17:30,442 --> 00:17:32,009
[Elevator bell dings]
Hey, you got to sign out.
440
00:17:32,077 --> 00:17:34,545
Nothing you do matters!
Your existence is a lie!
441
00:17:34,613 --> 00:17:38,382
If that were
really true, then...
442
00:17:38,450 --> 00:17:40,451
- I'm here to see Ron Mendleson.
- Third floor.
443
00:17:40,485 --> 00:17:41,986
Would you like
to go to dinner with--
444
00:17:42,020 --> 00:17:43,788
Uh, no.
445
00:17:43,822 --> 00:17:45,389
[Both panting]
446
00:17:46,458 --> 00:17:49,927
You may have created this
universe, Rick, but I live in it.
447
00:17:49,962 --> 00:17:51,462
[Bleep]
448
00:17:51,496 --> 00:17:53,631
What are we gonna do, Rick?
We're so screwed.
449
00:17:53,665 --> 00:17:55,066
He's gonna get to the
ship and smash the microverse,
450
00:17:55,091 --> 00:17:56,091
and then he's gonna kill us!
451
00:17:56,134 --> 00:17:57,660
Quick, Morty, you've
got to turn into a car.
452
00:17:57,685 --> 00:17:58,169
What?!
453
00:17:58,203 --> 00:18:00,604
A long time ago, I implanted you
with a subdermal chip
454
00:18:00,672 --> 00:18:03,107
that could call upon dormant
nanobots in your bloodstream
455
00:18:03,141 --> 00:18:05,509
to restructure your anatomy
and turn you into a car.
456
00:18:05,544 --> 00:18:06,777
- Oh, my God!
- Concentrate, Morty.
457
00:18:06,812 --> 00:18:08,179
Concentrate and turn
into a car, Morty.
458
00:18:08,213 --> 00:18:09,747
[Grunts]
459
00:18:09,815 --> 00:18:11,615
Never mind. Here's a taxi.
Get in. It's fine.
460
00:18:11,650 --> 00:18:13,117
...six...
461
00:18:15,821 --> 00:18:16,954
- Hey, Zeep.
- Huh?
462
00:18:16,989 --> 00:18:19,690
Happy Ricksgiving, biiiiiitch.
463
00:18:19,725 --> 00:18:21,826
Aaah!
464
00:18:21,860 --> 00:18:23,527
We did it, Morty.
465
00:18:23,562 --> 00:18:25,096
Now let's get out of here
and destroy this whole universe.
466
00:18:25,130 --> 00:18:26,464
Excuse me?
467
00:18:26,498 --> 00:18:27,898
...five--
468
00:18:27,933 --> 00:18:29,600
Sir?
469
00:18:29,668 --> 00:18:31,435
[Spiders hiss]
470
00:18:31,503 --> 00:18:32,937
- Holy hell.
- Sir!
471
00:18:32,971 --> 00:18:34,071
[Tires screech]
472
00:18:34,106 --> 00:18:35,206
Hold you fire!
473
00:18:36,842 --> 00:18:37,942
[Spider snarls]
474
00:18:37,976 --> 00:18:39,744
What's going on?
475
00:18:39,778 --> 00:18:41,512
FEMALE VOICE: I have brokered
a peace agreement
476
00:18:41,546 --> 00:18:43,614
between the giant spiders
and the government.
477
00:18:43,648 --> 00:18:47,051
Thanks to the skilled diplomacy
of this mysterious space car,
478
00:18:47,085 --> 00:18:49,987
from this day forward,
human- and spiderkind will live
479
00:18:50,022 --> 00:18:51,856
side by side in peace.
480
00:18:51,923 --> 00:18:54,692
We will stop bombing them,
and they will no longer use
481
00:18:54,726 --> 00:18:56,761
their telepathic abilities
to make us wander into webs
482
00:18:56,828 --> 00:18:58,462
for later consumption.
483
00:18:58,497 --> 00:19:00,564
Instead, we will work together
to make this world
484
00:19:00,599 --> 00:19:04,602
a better place for all,
no matter how many legs.
485
00:19:04,669 --> 00:19:06,771
What do we do
about the space car?
486
00:19:06,838 --> 00:19:08,139
Leave it alone.
487
00:19:08,173 --> 00:19:09,807
I mean, what did it
really do, anyways?
488
00:19:09,841 --> 00:19:11,108
Kill a guy
and paralyze his buddy?
489
00:19:11,143 --> 00:19:14,011
[Chuckles] Not a bad trade
for spider peace.
490
00:19:14,046 --> 00:19:15,980
All right, that's it.
Move out!
491
00:19:20,886 --> 00:19:23,721
[Laughs]
I love this spider!
492
00:19:23,789 --> 00:19:25,489
FEMALE VOICE:
Summer is safe.
493
00:19:25,524 --> 00:19:26,991
All right, I get it.
494
00:19:31,029 --> 00:19:32,229
Rick!
495
00:19:32,264 --> 00:19:33,931
[Thunder crashes]
496
00:19:33,999 --> 00:19:35,566
Don't do it.
497
00:19:35,600 --> 00:19:38,869
You quit school, but you
still got some learning to do.
498
00:19:49,915 --> 00:19:51,015
[Both groan]
499
00:19:51,049 --> 00:19:52,683
Aah!
500
00:19:52,717 --> 00:19:54,118
Unh!
501
00:20:00,792 --> 00:20:02,893
[Snorts, spits]
502
00:20:02,928 --> 00:20:04,995
Class dismissed.
503
00:20:05,030 --> 00:20:07,264
Geez.
504
00:20:13,939 --> 00:20:15,873
[Bottles clatter]
505
00:20:15,941 --> 00:20:17,508
- You all right?
- Uh-huh!
506
00:20:17,576 --> 00:20:18,776
What are you doing, Rick?
507
00:20:18,844 --> 00:20:20,544
I'm pretty sure
the battery's dead.
508
00:20:20,579 --> 00:20:21,879
Oh, you think so, huh, Morty?
509
00:20:21,947 --> 00:20:23,080
Well, let's see.
[Engine turns over]
510
00:20:23,115 --> 00:20:25,983
Hey, wait-- huh?
I don't get it.
511
00:20:26,017 --> 00:20:28,252
Of course you don't.
But Zeep did.
512
00:20:28,320 --> 00:20:29,854
He knew that once I got
back to my car,
513
00:20:29,888 --> 00:20:31,789
one of two things
was gonna happen--
514
00:20:31,823 --> 00:20:33,858
I was gonna have to toss
a broken battery,
515
00:20:33,892 --> 00:20:36,727
or the battery wouldn't
be broken.
516
00:20:41,166 --> 00:20:45,035
Peace among worlds, Rick.
517
00:20:45,103 --> 00:20:46,237
Jesus.
518
00:20:46,271 --> 00:20:48,572
Yeah.
Listen to that baby purr.
519
00:20:48,607 --> 00:20:49,374
You were right, Morty--
520
00:20:49,399 --> 00:20:51,142
We really just needed to
be honest with those guys.
521
00:20:51,176 --> 00:20:52,376
All right, here we go.
522
00:20:54,980 --> 00:20:56,814
Thank y-o-o-ou.
523
00:20:56,848 --> 00:20:58,816
See, Morty?
This is what it's all about.
524
00:20:58,850 --> 00:21:00,284
This is why we do what we do.
525
00:21:00,318 --> 00:21:01,785
- Uh-huh.
- Ew! What the hell?
526
00:21:01,853 --> 00:21:03,954
Jesus!
There's flies in my ice cream.
527
00:21:03,989 --> 00:21:05,222
Presidential decree--
528
00:21:05,257 --> 00:21:09,326
All ice cream is now for all beings,
no matter how many legs.
529
00:21:09,361 --> 00:21:11,428
- What the [bleep] did you do, Summer?!
- It was your ship!
530
00:21:11,463 --> 00:21:13,063
- Your stupid ship did it!
- Don't blame my ship!
531
00:21:13,098 --> 00:21:14,932
- It melted a child!
- My ship doesn't do anything...
532
00:21:14,999 --> 00:21:16,467
- It killed it itself!
- ...unless it's told to do something!
533
00:21:16,501 --> 00:21:18,341
- We almost died!
- I don't want to hear it, Summer!
534
00:21:18,370 --> 00:21:20,404
[Shouting indistinctly]
Your boobs are all hanging about,
535
00:21:20,472 --> 00:21:22,373
and you ruined ice cream
with your boobs out.
536
00:21:22,407 --> 00:21:24,108
And don't even try
to deny it, either.
537
00:21:24,142 --> 00:21:25,242
MORTY: [Groans]
538
00:21:25,366 --> 00:21:31,366
Sync & corrections by XhmikosR
www.addic7ed.com
539
00:22:01,013 --> 00:22:02,413
[Car alarm chirps]
540
00:22:03,348 --> 00:22:05,550
[Engine revs, students scream]
541
00:22:05,617 --> 00:22:12,023
[Alarm blaring, horn honking]
542
00:22:14,293 --> 00:22:15,293
Did you get any of that?
543
00:22:15,594 --> 00:22:20,031
It's a good show.