1 00:00:00,233 --> 00:00:02,668 Don't let any of those things get away, Morty. 2 00:00:02,703 --> 00:00:04,114 It their DNA gets into Earth's food chain, 3 00:00:04,138 --> 00:00:05,615 our entire species could be sterilized. 4 00:00:05,639 --> 00:00:07,139 Then why aren't we killing them? 5 00:00:07,174 --> 00:00:08,785 Right, next time I need a species sterilized, 6 00:00:08,809 --> 00:00:10,242 who's gonna do it for me, you? 7 00:00:10,277 --> 00:00:11,677 Whoa! Rick! 8 00:00:11,712 --> 00:00:13,479 I-Is that the Vindibeacon? 9 00:00:13,514 --> 00:00:15,614 We're being called to assemble by the Vindicators! 10 00:00:15,649 --> 00:00:17,594 I refuse to answer a literal call to adventure, Morty. 11 00:00:17,618 --> 00:00:19,418 Let it go to voice mail. Rick, 12 00:00:19,453 --> 00:00:22,121 the Vindicators only call when the universe itself is at stake. 13 00:00:22,156 --> 00:00:23,667 They're the first line of defense against evil. 14 00:00:23,691 --> 00:00:25,290 They're the guardians of the unguarded! 15 00:00:25,326 --> 00:00:27,437 They're the writers of their own press releases, Morty. 16 00:00:27,461 --> 00:00:29,673 They're a bunch of drama queens that spend an hour talking 17 00:00:29,697 --> 00:00:31,663 and 20 minutes jumping around while shit blows up. 18 00:00:31,699 --> 00:00:33,399 They're a phase. 19 00:00:33,434 --> 00:00:35,834 We did one, it was the big even of that summer, let it die. 20 00:00:35,870 --> 00:00:38,137 I, Morty Smith, invoke my right 21 00:00:38,172 --> 00:00:40,639 to choose one in every 10 Rick and Morty adventures. 22 00:00:40,674 --> 00:00:42,674 God damn it! Read 'em and weep. 23 00:00:42,710 --> 00:00:45,310 Fine. But don't say I didn't warn you. 24 00:00:45,346 --> 00:00:48,447 Yes! Vindicator Command Ship... Beacon received. 25 00:00:48,482 --> 00:00:51,683 We're doing Vindicators Twoooooo! 26 00:00:51,719 --> 00:00:53,252 Whoops. 27 00:00:53,287 --> 00:00:56,155 Uh, Morty, you might want to freeze some sperm. 28 00:01:27,888 --> 00:01:29,154 Supernova: Vindicators. 29 00:01:29,190 --> 00:01:30,456 Worldender is back, 30 00:01:30,491 --> 00:01:32,791 and this time he's out to end more than worlds. 31 00:01:32,827 --> 00:01:35,727 We have reason to believe his stronghold is located on... 32 00:01:35,763 --> 00:01:36,795 My balls. Rick! 33 00:01:36,831 --> 00:01:38,497 The Terraneous system. 34 00:01:38,532 --> 00:01:42,101 Once in range, Million Ants will scan for pheromone activity 35 00:01:42,136 --> 00:01:44,269 which should lead us to the location of the base. 36 00:01:44,305 --> 00:01:46,371 Oh, that's Million Ants. 37 00:01:46,407 --> 00:01:48,373 I can't see the ants from over here, 38 00:01:48,442 --> 00:01:49,586 I just assumed that was, uh, turd man, 39 00:01:49,610 --> 00:01:51,510 wiggly turd man. 40 00:01:51,545 --> 00:01:54,346 Rick, stop! Rick, you have something to add to the briefing? 41 00:01:54,381 --> 00:01:56,515 Uh, yeah, just a few more design notes... 42 00:01:56,550 --> 00:01:59,384 Um, this guy, the, uh... the, uh... 43 00:01:59,420 --> 00:02:01,120 I am Crocubot. 44 00:02:01,155 --> 00:02:02,788 Right, Crocubot. 45 00:02:02,823 --> 00:02:05,724 So, you're half cold, unfeeling reptile, half... 46 00:02:05,759 --> 00:02:07,359 also cold... 47 00:02:07,394 --> 00:02:09,394 equally unfeeling machine. Yes. 48 00:02:09,430 --> 00:02:11,263 Wow. So, your origin is what? 49 00:02:11,298 --> 00:02:13,398 Y-You fell into a vat of redundancy? 50 00:02:13,434 --> 00:02:15,367 Got damn! 51 00:02:15,402 --> 00:02:17,136 Noob Noob, we're having a briefing. 52 00:02:17,171 --> 00:02:18,537 If I can continue, Rick. 53 00:02:18,572 --> 00:02:20,806 I anticipate sophisticated security measures. 54 00:02:20,841 --> 00:02:22,875 I trust you can be of service there. 55 00:02:22,910 --> 00:02:25,210 Well, let me check my list of powers and weaknesses. 56 00:02:25,246 --> 00:02:27,613 Ability to do anything... But only whenever I want... 57 00:02:27,648 --> 00:02:29,481 Yeah, that sounds like a job for me. 58 00:02:29,517 --> 00:02:32,184 I wish he had the ability to check his attitude. 59 00:02:32,219 --> 00:02:33,752 Alan Rails, ladies and gentlemen. 60 00:02:33,787 --> 00:02:35,532 After his parents tragic death in a railroad accident, 61 00:02:35,556 --> 00:02:37,523 he gained the power to summon ghost trains. 62 00:02:37,558 --> 00:02:39,424 It's not all bad though, 63 00:02:39,460 --> 00:02:41,805 they were spared having to see their grown son wear a WHISTLE. 64 00:02:41,829 --> 00:02:43,729 Got damn! 65 00:02:43,764 --> 00:02:45,597 Thanks, Noob Noob. This guy gets it. 66 00:02:48,669 --> 00:02:51,236 Vance Maximus, Renegade Star Soldier... 67 00:02:52,540 --> 00:02:54,206 Sorry I'm late. It was happy hour. 68 00:02:54,241 --> 00:02:56,408 Happy hour. 69 00:02:56,443 --> 00:02:58,477 Uh, I was also late because of my drinking 70 00:02:58,512 --> 00:03:00,279 and mentioned it to zero applause. 71 00:03:00,314 --> 00:03:02,447 Rick Sanchez. Tinkerer of Terror. 72 00:03:02,483 --> 00:03:03,715 Man, that's hard to say. 73 00:03:03,751 --> 00:03:05,584 And... Morty, right? 74 00:03:05,619 --> 00:03:07,653 Whoa, yeah! I never forget a kid. 75 00:03:07,688 --> 00:03:09,933 What do you say, Vindicators, let's make this three for three? 76 00:03:09,957 --> 00:03:11,256 - Haha! - Yes! 77 00:03:11,292 --> 00:03:12,724 Did he say "three for three"? 78 00:03:12,760 --> 00:03:14,593 Did he say he never forgets a kid? 79 00:03:14,628 --> 00:03:16,328 You mean two for two, right, Vance? 80 00:03:18,265 --> 00:03:21,934 Actually, we assembled a second time last summer 81 00:03:21,969 --> 00:03:23,802 to fight Doomnomitron. 82 00:03:23,837 --> 00:03:26,572 So this is... Vindicators Three? 83 00:03:26,607 --> 00:03:31,510 And you guys did Vindicators Two... without us? 84 00:03:31,545 --> 00:03:34,513 I sense... insecurity. 85 00:03:34,548 --> 00:03:36,648 Are you sure there's not just a picnic nearby? 86 00:03:37,918 --> 00:03:39,418 I guess he found his crowd. 87 00:03:39,453 --> 00:03:41,486 Pretty toothless stuff, guys. 88 00:03:44,558 --> 00:03:46,636 I hope you're happy with the adventure so far, Morty. 89 00:03:46,660 --> 00:03:48,694 These guys are even lamer than last time. 90 00:03:48,729 --> 00:03:50,596 We weren't here last time, remember? 91 00:03:50,631 --> 00:03:52,598 They did a whole Vindicators without us. 92 00:03:52,633 --> 00:03:54,399 A bunch of them got killed, too. 93 00:03:54,435 --> 00:03:57,736 They lost Lady Katana, Calypso, Diablo Verde... 94 00:03:57,771 --> 00:04:00,606 Yikes. Yeah, things did feel less diverse in there. 95 00:04:00,641 --> 00:04:03,709 This article says the reason we weren't involved was... 96 00:04:03,744 --> 00:04:05,244 "personality conflicts." 97 00:04:05,279 --> 00:04:07,346 Don't worry, Morty, they love you. 98 00:04:07,381 --> 00:04:09,248 Superheroes need a wide-eyed unremarkable 99 00:04:09,283 --> 00:04:10,393 to tag along and react to everything 100 00:04:10,417 --> 00:04:11,817 like it's mind blowing. 101 00:04:11,852 --> 00:04:15,354 I... think the personality conflict might have been... 102 00:04:15,389 --> 00:04:16,622 you? 103 00:04:16,657 --> 00:04:19,291 Jesus... 104 00:04:19,360 --> 00:04:20,759 How awesome is that? 105 00:04:20,794 --> 00:04:22,527 I mean, they wanted to not need me so bad 106 00:04:22,563 --> 00:04:24,396 they murdered three innocent heroes of color 107 00:04:24,431 --> 00:04:25,831 and they still had to bring me back? 108 00:04:25,866 --> 00:04:27,833 Rick, since it's my adventure and all, 109 00:04:27,868 --> 00:04:29,468 could you do me a favor? 110 00:04:29,503 --> 00:04:31,903 Uh, the adventure is the favor, Morty. 111 00:04:31,939 --> 00:04:34,006 Me sleeping on these linens is the favor. 112 00:04:34,041 --> 00:04:36,875 I mean, w-w-what... what are we vindicating? Comfort? 113 00:04:36,910 --> 00:04:38,543 Rick, this really bums me out. 114 00:04:38,579 --> 00:04:41,280 It-It's embarrassing to find out these guys don't like us. 115 00:04:41,315 --> 00:04:42,914 Why? Morty I defeat gagoos 116 00:04:42,950 --> 00:04:44,983 more powerful than these guys every week. 117 00:04:45,019 --> 00:04:46,785 Yeah, but not heroes. 118 00:04:46,820 --> 00:04:48,999 Oh, please, they just call themselves heroes so they can... 119 00:04:49,023 --> 00:04:52,791 I'm calling them that, Rick! They're my heroes. Mine! 120 00:04:54,795 --> 00:04:57,763 Huh, no accounting for taste. 121 00:04:57,798 --> 00:04:59,564 I'm gonna go get a drink. 122 00:05:07,341 --> 00:05:08,874 PA System: Good morning, Vindicators. 123 00:05:08,942 --> 00:05:11,043 Ship has arrived at Terraneous system. 124 00:05:11,078 --> 00:05:14,680 All Vindicators report to the... briefing room. 125 00:05:14,715 --> 00:05:17,015 The... The room from the, uh... the... 126 00:05:17,051 --> 00:05:18,950 Uh, it's the d... It's a different room than... 127 00:05:18,986 --> 00:05:20,652 Than conference room. 128 00:05:20,688 --> 00:05:23,088 I'm sorry, it's my first day as a PA System. 129 00:05:23,123 --> 00:05:25,724 First-day jitters. 130 00:05:28,028 --> 00:05:29,795 Oh, God. 131 00:05:29,830 --> 00:05:32,331 Good morning. Looks like your grandpa had a long night. 132 00:05:32,366 --> 00:05:34,900 Crocubot, why don't you escort Mr. Sanchez 133 00:05:34,935 --> 00:05:37,769 to a more comfortable spot so that someone can... 134 00:05:37,805 --> 00:05:40,539 clean up his diarrhea. 135 00:05:40,574 --> 00:05:43,342 Oooh, I'm nervous about my first mission! 136 00:05:43,377 --> 00:05:45,744 Actually, Noob Noob, you have a new mission. 137 00:05:45,779 --> 00:05:49,548 Got... damn. Vindicators, prepare for arrival. 138 00:05:49,583 --> 00:05:52,117 Morty, the Vindicators and I had a chat this morning, 139 00:05:52,152 --> 00:05:54,720 and I'm afraid we need to make a little change. 140 00:05:54,755 --> 00:05:57,723 I-I totally get it. I-I'm so sorry. 141 00:05:57,758 --> 00:05:58,957 You should be. 142 00:05:58,992 --> 00:06:00,036 Running around in a yellow T-shirt 143 00:06:00,060 --> 00:06:01,360 like you're not one of us. 144 00:06:01,395 --> 00:06:04,629 Disgraceful. I-I-I'm not a superhero. 145 00:06:04,665 --> 00:06:05,831 Cop a squat, chief. 146 00:06:05,866 --> 00:06:07,733 Everyone in the universe is a hero. 147 00:06:07,768 --> 00:06:09,746 All you have to do is know the difference between good and bad, 148 00:06:09,770 --> 00:06:11,103 and root for good. 149 00:06:11,138 --> 00:06:13,672 Rick says good and bad are artificial constructs. 150 00:06:13,707 --> 00:06:15,941 Yeah, well, I get the feeling... 151 00:06:15,976 --> 00:06:18,377 He kind of needs that to be the case. 152 00:06:18,412 --> 00:06:19,678 Not coming, Noob Noob? 153 00:06:19,713 --> 00:06:24,449 Ohh! No, uh, I got stuff to do here. 154 00:06:30,924 --> 00:06:33,058 Vance: Security drones, inbound. 155 00:06:33,093 --> 00:06:35,927 Star Mother, grant me your wrath. 156 00:06:39,032 --> 00:06:41,566 All aboard! 157 00:06:53,647 --> 00:06:55,881 Gun turret. Are you all right? 158 00:06:55,916 --> 00:06:57,783 Yes. I only lost 400 ants. 159 00:06:57,818 --> 00:06:59,651 My queen is laying more. 160 00:06:59,686 --> 00:07:02,521 I am back to... one Million Ants. 161 00:07:02,556 --> 00:07:03,889 Someone wake up Sanchez. 162 00:07:06,026 --> 00:07:07,793 Ugh! Oh, Christ. 163 00:07:07,828 --> 00:07:09,594 Rick. You're up. Barely. 164 00:07:09,630 --> 00:07:11,430 We're taking fire from an automated turret. 165 00:07:11,465 --> 00:07:12,798 Can you bring it offline? Uh-huh. 166 00:07:22,109 --> 00:07:24,609 Uh, my God, that's better. Rick! 167 00:07:24,645 --> 00:07:26,445 Hey, I can't help if I can't see. 168 00:07:46,066 --> 00:07:47,899 I could've just used a ghost train. 169 00:07:47,935 --> 00:07:50,602 Really? You don't say. You would've used a ghost train? 170 00:07:50,637 --> 00:07:52,771 Hey, everybody, the ghost train guy 171 00:07:52,806 --> 00:07:54,706 would have used a ghost train. 172 00:07:54,741 --> 00:07:56,541 - Man, you. - Is there coffee? 173 00:07:56,577 --> 00:07:57,843 Hey, Morty, can you be a pal, 174 00:07:57,878 --> 00:07:59,611 Grandpa left his coffee maker on the ship, 175 00:07:59,646 --> 00:08:00,579 you know, the French press thing... 176 00:08:00,614 --> 00:08:01,813 Get it yourself. 177 00:08:05,118 --> 00:08:07,652 Little extra snippy this morning, aren't you? 178 00:08:07,688 --> 00:08:09,554 Just focus on the mission, all right? 179 00:08:09,590 --> 00:08:11,456 Oh-oh-oh, I'm sorry, oh, you're right. 180 00:08:11,492 --> 00:08:15,660 Ohh, real serious. Gotta take it real serious, huh? 181 00:08:15,696 --> 00:08:18,964 Son of a Steam Engine. They're all dead. 182 00:08:18,999 --> 00:08:22,033 Why would Worldender do this to his own men... 183 00:08:22,069 --> 00:08:24,536 and several women? Well, he is the Worldender. 184 00:08:24,571 --> 00:08:26,738 The guy ends worlds. Kind of his thing. 185 00:08:26,773 --> 00:08:29,808 - Ohh, real scared. - Real on alert, 186 00:08:29,843 --> 00:08:32,043 high alert over here. 187 00:08:32,079 --> 00:08:34,145 Watch out! 188 00:08:34,181 --> 00:08:35,580 What the?! 189 00:08:35,616 --> 00:08:37,649 It's Worldender! What happened to him? 190 00:08:38,886 --> 00:08:41,152 I sense his life force is fading. 191 00:08:41,188 --> 00:08:43,054 Million Ants, ladies and gentlemen. 192 00:08:43,090 --> 00:08:45,524 The ant colony with the power of two human eyes. 193 00:08:46,827 --> 00:08:49,194 All right. Short mission. Good mission. 194 00:08:49,229 --> 00:08:51,630 Remember when Alan wanted to use a ghost train? 195 00:08:51,665 --> 00:08:54,633 See you guys in Vindicators Four. Morty? Rick, whoever did this 196 00:08:54,668 --> 00:08:56,179 is an even bigger threat than Worldender. 197 00:08:56,203 --> 00:08:57,602 We can't leave now. 198 00:08:57,638 --> 00:09:00,005 He's right. This is far from over. 199 00:09:00,040 --> 00:09:01,640 Well, have fun with that, 200 00:09:01,675 --> 00:09:03,553 but Morty and I have to meet a Lady Comet, a Monorail Man, 201 00:09:03,577 --> 00:09:05,644 Two Assholes, and a Full Alligator in like an hour. 202 00:09:18,959 --> 00:09:20,025 Shit. 203 00:09:20,060 --> 00:09:21,693 I sense the presence 204 00:09:21,728 --> 00:09:23,228 of a greater evil. 205 00:09:23,263 --> 00:09:26,598 Drunk Check, check. One, two. 206 00:09:26,633 --> 00:09:29,634 Okay. Is it recording? Good. 207 00:09:29,670 --> 00:09:31,036 Hello, Vindicators. 208 00:09:31,071 --> 00:09:33,438 Welcome to your reckoning, baby! 209 00:09:33,740 --> 00:09:36,074 Official. 210 00:09:36,109 --> 00:09:38,176 I had too much to drink last night. 211 00:09:41,214 --> 00:09:43,114 You're, you know, the Vindicators. 212 00:09:43,150 --> 00:09:46,184 So, now that we know... Rick? What's going on, buddy? 213 00:09:46,219 --> 00:09:49,187 Obviously, I came here last night during a blackout. 214 00:09:49,222 --> 00:09:50,789 "Obviously?" 215 00:09:50,824 --> 00:09:52,991 You came here and defeated our arch nemesis... 216 00:09:53,026 --> 00:09:55,093 while so drunk you don't remember doing it? 217 00:09:55,128 --> 00:09:57,329 That's something "obvious" to you? 218 00:09:57,364 --> 00:09:59,375 Look, I'm a lit... little more complex than you guys, 219 00:09:59,399 --> 00:10:01,132 and, no offense, but I've always suspected 220 00:10:01,168 --> 00:10:02,512 that a lot of what you do in a year 221 00:10:02,536 --> 00:10:04,269 could be knocked out in a couple of hours. 222 00:10:04,304 --> 00:10:07,005 So I thought, why not just do your job for you, 223 00:10:07,040 --> 00:10:08,940 so we can have a little fun game. 224 00:10:11,144 --> 00:10:13,111 Rick, is... Is this a "Saw" thing? 225 00:10:13,146 --> 00:10:15,347 Are you seriously Sawing the Vindicators? 226 00:10:15,382 --> 00:10:17,482 Morty, I'm a drunk, not a hack. 227 00:10:17,517 --> 00:10:20,251 If you break the rules, lose the game or try to leave, 228 00:10:20,287 --> 00:10:21,319 you will die. 229 00:10:21,355 --> 00:10:23,555 Like in "Sawwww." 230 00:10:23,590 --> 00:10:25,090 Well, I-I-I think we've seen enough, 231 00:10:25,125 --> 00:10:26,469 I'll just figure out how to unplug this. 232 00:10:26,493 --> 00:10:28,126 Okay, here we go. Room number one. 233 00:10:28,161 --> 00:10:29,872 The Vindicators are known throughout the galaxy, 234 00:10:29,896 --> 00:10:32,497 but do they know yourselves, do you know yourselves? 235 00:10:32,532 --> 00:10:35,367 Match your... your shit, your... your gimmicks, 236 00:10:35,402 --> 00:10:38,603 with your faces, and y-you get it, it's a matching thing. 237 00:10:38,672 --> 00:10:42,407 And do it in three minutes or you'll all die. 238 00:10:43,944 --> 00:10:45,288 Screw this. I'm not playing his game. 239 00:10:45,312 --> 00:10:46,656 I'm gonna find us a way out of here. 240 00:10:46,680 --> 00:10:48,079 Whoa, whoa, whoa. Hold on, Vance. 241 00:10:48,148 --> 00:10:49,559 He said you'd die if you tried to leave. 242 00:10:49,583 --> 00:10:50,982 That means there's booby traps. 243 00:10:51,018 --> 00:10:53,351 Why are you acting like that's not you? 244 00:10:53,387 --> 00:10:54,931 What part of "blackout" don't you understand? 245 00:10:54,955 --> 00:10:56,187 I thought you drank. 246 00:10:56,223 --> 00:10:58,857 Like cool drinking! Like sexy drinking, 247 00:10:58,892 --> 00:11:01,092 not this psycho, trailer-park shit! 248 00:11:01,128 --> 00:11:02,961 Vance, stay calm... 249 00:11:02,996 --> 00:11:04,874 Oh, so you're the leader now, because we gave you a jacket? 250 00:11:04,898 --> 00:11:07,298 You're the learning-disabled kid we do photo ops with. 251 00:11:07,334 --> 00:11:09,067 Okay, ouch, but... Okay, this... 252 00:11:09,102 --> 00:11:12,103 This is triggering me. I need space. 253 00:11:12,139 --> 00:11:15,974 I-I need space from this! 254 00:11:38,665 --> 00:11:40,365 Give me one reason 255 00:11:40,400 --> 00:11:42,333 why I shouldn't crush your windpipe. 256 00:11:42,369 --> 00:11:45,403 Because my epidermis is laced with a nanofiber defense mesh... 257 00:11:45,439 --> 00:11:47,706 And because, like I said, I don't remember last night. 258 00:11:47,741 --> 00:11:50,341 I told you not to invite this mummified mother back. 259 00:11:50,377 --> 00:11:52,021 Alan, I'm not proud of what's happening here, 260 00:11:52,045 --> 00:11:53,445 but if you keep coming at me, 261 00:11:53,480 --> 00:11:55,024 there's gonna be another passenger on that ghost train. 262 00:11:55,048 --> 00:11:58,049 Guys! I figured it out. 263 00:11:58,085 --> 00:12:00,652 - Congrats! - You did it it! 264 00:12:00,687 --> 00:12:04,089 It was a bit. All of the descriptors apply to all of you. 265 00:12:04,124 --> 00:12:05,590 Drunk Rick's point 266 00:12:05,625 --> 00:12:07,103 is that none of you are very special or different. 267 00:12:07,127 --> 00:12:09,160 That's always his point. 268 00:12:09,196 --> 00:12:11,262 Let's just get through this as quickly as possible. 269 00:12:11,298 --> 00:12:13,264 Then we'll deal with the two of you. 270 00:12:13,300 --> 00:12:16,067 The two of us? I hope you're proud of yourself. 271 00:12:16,103 --> 00:12:18,269 Uh, I kind of am. I saved the God damn universe. 272 00:12:18,305 --> 00:12:19,604 That's not the issue, Rick! 273 00:12:19,639 --> 00:12:22,173 Ahh, it would've been if I hadn't! 274 00:12:22,209 --> 00:12:23,575 The Vindicators say their job 275 00:12:23,610 --> 00:12:25,543 is to fight evil wherever it hides, 276 00:12:25,579 --> 00:12:28,546 but they don't... Pick the location you'll... 277 00:12:28,582 --> 00:12:31,416 You'll never hear them even mention, 278 00:12:31,451 --> 00:12:34,552 because to fight darkness is to fight yourself. 279 00:12:34,588 --> 00:12:36,554 Oh! I know this. Dorian 5! 280 00:12:36,590 --> 00:12:37,722 Crocubot, don't! 281 00:12:37,758 --> 00:12:40,225 There's no other possible answer. 282 00:12:40,260 --> 00:12:43,628 My mechanical and reptilian logic are certain of it. 283 00:12:43,663 --> 00:12:45,163 Oh! 284 00:12:45,198 --> 00:12:47,298 Huh! I'm seeing more croc than bot here. 285 00:12:47,334 --> 00:12:48,666 God damn it! 286 00:12:48,702 --> 00:12:50,602 Uh, what happened on Dorian 5? Nothing! 287 00:12:50,637 --> 00:12:54,339 Nothing? We exterminated a planet. 288 00:12:54,374 --> 00:12:55,673 W-Wait. Huh? 289 00:12:55,742 --> 00:12:58,443 Doomnomitron was hiding there! He's a shapeshifter. 290 00:12:58,478 --> 00:13:01,479 Destroying Dorian 5 was the only way to kill him. 291 00:13:01,515 --> 00:13:03,047 Come on, guys, we're all thinking it. 292 00:13:03,083 --> 00:13:04,249 Don't... 293 00:13:04,284 --> 00:13:05,284 Don't make me say it. 294 00:13:05,318 --> 00:13:06,718 Oh, okay. This again. 295 00:13:06,753 --> 00:13:09,020 You know, I could have made you a device 296 00:13:09,055 --> 00:13:11,723 to detect Doomnomitron from orbit like that. 297 00:13:11,758 --> 00:13:14,626 I'm not the one that didn't want you back. Alan was. 298 00:13:14,661 --> 00:13:18,229 If you lay those deaths at my doorstep one more time... 299 00:13:18,265 --> 00:13:20,398 Do not threaten her. 300 00:13:20,433 --> 00:13:22,734 Congrats, you did it. 301 00:13:22,769 --> 00:13:24,769 What the hell is "Israel"? 302 00:13:24,805 --> 00:13:26,738 It-It's just something Rick starts talking about 303 00:13:26,773 --> 00:13:28,072 when he's blackout drunk. 304 00:13:28,108 --> 00:13:29,340 W-What? In w... In w-w-what? 305 00:13:29,376 --> 00:13:31,342 Like, w-w-what's my point? 306 00:13:31,378 --> 00:13:33,211 In a way that has no point, 307 00:13:33,246 --> 00:13:34,490 you just babble about defense budgets and the United Nations 308 00:13:34,514 --> 00:13:35,780 and then you pass out. 309 00:13:35,816 --> 00:13:38,449 So, to be clear, I sometimes reference 310 00:13:38,485 --> 00:13:41,486 the geopolitical complexities of the topic... 311 00:13:41,521 --> 00:13:43,788 Which is not the same as going to an anti-Semitic place. 312 00:13:43,824 --> 00:13:45,523 I have not stake in this... 313 00:13:45,559 --> 00:13:47,403 I don't either, I'm... I'm just saying, if anything, 314 00:13:47,427 --> 00:13:49,472 the drunk version of me is probably so supportive of Israel 315 00:13:49,496 --> 00:13:50,807 he wants what's best for it and... 316 00:13:50,831 --> 00:13:54,399 Hey, man, I'm not touching this. You do you. 317 00:13:56,803 --> 00:14:00,271 Aloha... means hello and goodbye in Hawaii. 318 00:14:00,307 --> 00:14:03,675 But, uh, aloha means... 319 00:14:03,710 --> 00:14:05,510 Has nothing to do with this room. 320 00:14:05,545 --> 00:14:08,112 I'm so drunk. 321 00:14:08,148 --> 00:14:09,547 Ugh, okay. Here's the deal. 322 00:14:09,583 --> 00:14:11,382 I-I want to rest my eyes for a little bit, 323 00:14:11,418 --> 00:14:12,784 I'm... I'm not going to sleep, 324 00:14:12,819 --> 00:14:14,586 I just... just need to rest my eyes, 325 00:14:14,621 --> 00:14:16,421 so let's make this one simple... 326 00:14:16,456 --> 00:14:18,423 Just... try to hit some three pointers. 327 00:14:18,491 --> 00:14:21,226 Let's say... you have to hit... five three pointers 328 00:14:21,261 --> 00:14:23,261 in... five minutes... or... I don't know, 329 00:14:23,296 --> 00:14:25,241 the whole place... the whole planet will get blown up 330 00:14:25,265 --> 00:14:27,065 with a n-neutrino bomb. 331 00:14:27,100 --> 00:14:29,300 And try to make it a-a lesson about... yourselves, 332 00:14:29,336 --> 00:14:31,102 like... like how selfish you are... 333 00:14:31,137 --> 00:14:32,337 Are or something. 334 00:14:32,372 --> 00:14:34,239 And also Hawaii. 335 00:14:34,274 --> 00:14:35,740 You guys hit the baskets, 336 00:14:35,775 --> 00:14:38,376 I'll disarm the drunkenly-improvised neutrino bomb. 337 00:14:38,411 --> 00:14:40,378 There's a 40 percent chance it's a dud, 338 00:14:40,413 --> 00:14:42,180 but y-you should still stay back. 339 00:14:42,215 --> 00:14:43,226 Morty, how many of these... 340 00:14:43,250 --> 00:14:44,749 Too many, Rick! Too many! 341 00:14:44,784 --> 00:14:48,219 Man, I am really getting high-roaded today. 342 00:14:50,924 --> 00:14:52,590 That's a three pointer. 343 00:14:52,626 --> 00:14:54,325 Nice shot. Thank you. 344 00:14:54,361 --> 00:14:56,227 You two make quite a team. 345 00:14:56,263 --> 00:14:58,162 We all do. 346 00:14:58,198 --> 00:14:59,364 Yeah, I guess... 347 00:14:59,399 --> 00:15:00,798 That's a three pointer. 348 00:15:00,834 --> 00:15:05,069 But you guys have always had a... an unspoken bond. 349 00:15:05,105 --> 00:15:07,805 I mean, really unspoken. 350 00:15:07,841 --> 00:15:11,609 Like, let's-not-tell-my-husband unspoken. 351 00:15:13,413 --> 00:15:16,147 We aren't married anymore, Alan. 352 00:15:16,182 --> 00:15:17,782 Sure, but were we married 353 00:15:17,817 --> 00:15:21,819 when you two were "stranded" on Delphi Six for three days? 354 00:15:21,855 --> 00:15:26,457 Because I sensed something was weird when you came back... 355 00:15:26,493 --> 00:15:28,693 But what do I know about sensitivity? 356 00:15:28,728 --> 00:15:30,862 I'm just a phantom train conductor. 357 00:15:30,897 --> 00:15:34,232 You're the pile of ordinary bugs that my wife! 358 00:15:34,267 --> 00:15:36,668 That's a three pointer. 359 00:15:36,703 --> 00:15:38,269 Where the is the lead wire? 360 00:15:38,305 --> 00:15:39,815 You always put it in the weirdest place. 361 00:15:39,839 --> 00:15:41,239 Um, uh, over here maybe? 362 00:15:41,274 --> 00:15:42,718 Jesus Christ, what a shitty neutrino bomb. 363 00:15:42,742 --> 00:15:44,642 It's a miracle I ever actually destroy anything. 364 00:15:44,678 --> 00:15:46,210 Oh, I don't know, 365 00:15:46,246 --> 00:15:47,556 you managed to destroy just about everything today. 366 00:15:47,580 --> 00:15:48,913 The villains, the heroes, 367 00:15:48,949 --> 00:15:50,581 the lines between them, my childhood... 368 00:15:50,617 --> 00:15:52,283 Thank yeewwwwww. I appreciate it, Morty, 369 00:15:52,319 --> 00:15:53,696 I know you were sucking the Kool-Aid 370 00:15:53,720 --> 00:15:55,186 out of the Vindicators' 371 00:15:55,221 --> 00:15:56,632 So the fact that I was right about them 372 00:15:56,656 --> 00:15:58,156 must be pretty hard to admit. 373 00:15:58,191 --> 00:15:59,590 Yeah, it is. You know why, Rick? 374 00:15:59,626 --> 00:16:00,858 Because when you're an asshole, 375 00:16:00,894 --> 00:16:02,460 it doesn't matter how right you are, 376 00:16:02,495 --> 00:16:04,228 nobody wants to give you the satisfaction. 377 00:16:04,264 --> 00:16:06,431 I know. Everyone wants people they like to be right. 378 00:16:06,466 --> 00:16:08,433 That's why popular people are dumb. 379 00:16:08,468 --> 00:16:10,234 And why your pretentious, poorly-written, 380 00:16:10,270 --> 00:16:11,536 high-budget friends back there 381 00:16:11,571 --> 00:16:13,237 can eat a double-decker shit sandwich. 382 00:16:13,273 --> 00:16:14,572 Disarmed. 383 00:16:14,607 --> 00:16:16,874 Holy shit. You're jealous. 384 00:16:16,910 --> 00:16:18,843 Yes! Is that what you want to hear?! 385 00:16:18,878 --> 00:16:20,345 Did it feel good? 386 00:16:20,380 --> 00:16:22,814 Did you like his six million wriggling legs 387 00:16:22,849 --> 00:16:24,749 more than my tragedy-stricken, 388 00:16:24,784 --> 00:16:27,618 half-ghost, half-tumescent penis?! Guys, stop! 389 00:16:27,654 --> 00:16:30,321 You're just proving my asshole grandpa right! 390 00:16:30,357 --> 00:16:33,458 You wish this was about sex! We loved each other! 391 00:16:33,493 --> 00:16:35,626 We had a child together! What?! 392 00:16:35,662 --> 00:16:39,564 I conceived a child with Million Ants and it died inside me 393 00:16:39,599 --> 00:16:43,701 because it was half a million ants and half collapsing star! 394 00:16:43,737 --> 00:16:47,638 And yes. He was better than you. 395 00:16:47,674 --> 00:16:48,773 Yeah? 396 00:16:48,808 --> 00:16:50,508 One... million... times... better. 397 00:16:50,543 --> 00:16:53,644 All aboard, mother 398 00:16:53,680 --> 00:16:55,446 Stop! 399 00:16:57,784 --> 00:17:00,418 Oof! Didn't see that coming. 400 00:17:00,453 --> 00:17:01,819 Is that sarcasm? 401 00:17:01,855 --> 00:17:03,955 I don't want you slipping away when this is over. 402 00:17:03,990 --> 00:17:05,757 All of these deaths are on your hands. 403 00:17:05,792 --> 00:17:07,392 Okay, come on, maybe a couple of them, 404 00:17:07,427 --> 00:17:08,671 but definitely not the Train Guy. 405 00:17:08,695 --> 00:17:09,695 Oof! All of them. 406 00:17:09,729 --> 00:17:11,195 Oookay. 407 00:17:11,231 --> 00:17:13,631 Congrats. You did it. 408 00:17:13,666 --> 00:17:17,268 All right, by now, I've been pretty clear 409 00:17:17,303 --> 00:17:19,604 that I think the Vindicators are full of shit. 410 00:17:19,672 --> 00:17:22,473 But... you do have one thing that I'll never have. 411 00:17:22,509 --> 00:17:24,320 And that thing is the only part of the Vindicators 412 00:17:24,344 --> 00:17:25,877 with any value to me. 413 00:17:25,912 --> 00:17:28,546 If you know what it is, place it on the platform. 414 00:17:28,581 --> 00:17:30,715 Guess wrong and pla-planet will explode. 415 00:17:30,750 --> 00:17:32,550 And probably the solar system, 416 00:17:32,585 --> 00:17:34,263 'cause I kind of eyeballed the neutrino bombs 417 00:17:34,287 --> 00:17:35,920 on this one. 418 00:17:35,955 --> 00:17:39,557 So what's the trick? Morty, you're the Drunk Rick expert. 419 00:17:39,592 --> 00:17:43,628 I think... no matter what we put on there, we die. 420 00:17:43,663 --> 00:17:46,230 He said it's the part of the Vindicators he values. 421 00:17:46,299 --> 00:17:47,365 That means nothing. 422 00:17:47,400 --> 00:17:48,699 He wants our last moment alive 423 00:17:48,735 --> 00:17:50,446 to be spent knowing how few he gave. 424 00:17:50,470 --> 00:17:53,004 Jesus! Okay, open to second opinions. 425 00:17:53,039 --> 00:17:54,539 It could... It could be Morty. 426 00:17:54,574 --> 00:17:55,807 What? Hey, I don't know. 427 00:17:55,842 --> 00:17:57,408 I mean, look, when I get drunk, 428 00:17:57,444 --> 00:17:59,644 I get stupid and emotional and there's no logic to it. 429 00:17:59,679 --> 00:18:01,879 It's, like, it's possible I got so drunk 430 00:18:01,915 --> 00:18:04,549 I felt like I was losing Morty to the Vindicators, 431 00:18:04,584 --> 00:18:06,717 and maybe this is my way of saying, "Okay", 432 00:18:06,753 --> 00:18:09,287 you can have him but only if you know how important he is, 433 00:18:09,322 --> 00:18:10,455 "otherwise I'll kill you." 434 00:18:10,490 --> 00:18:12,990 That is a... really specific guess. 435 00:18:13,026 --> 00:18:15,693 Look, I-I... there's nothing in the room but us. 436 00:18:15,728 --> 00:18:17,595 I'm just using logic to connect some dots, 437 00:18:17,630 --> 00:18:18,896 it's the best guess I've got. 438 00:18:18,932 --> 00:18:21,032 But you're betting our lives on it. 439 00:18:21,067 --> 00:18:23,534 I'll cover that bet. I get it. 440 00:18:23,570 --> 00:18:25,536 Well, Morty, I think you're doing that smirky face 441 00:18:25,572 --> 00:18:27,305 because you're misinterpreting the moment. 442 00:18:27,340 --> 00:18:29,507 I am not being coy about some hidden love for you. 443 00:18:29,542 --> 00:18:32,009 I want to be really clear that if anyone has a better guess, 444 00:18:32,045 --> 00:18:34,412 like, if I gave you an amulet last night, or... 445 00:18:35,582 --> 00:18:37,415 Phew. 446 00:18:39,052 --> 00:18:40,084 Oh, shit. 447 00:18:42,755 --> 00:18:45,323 Sorry. I'm... not good at goodbyes, 448 00:18:45,358 --> 00:18:47,859 and... I'm drunk, so, you know, I just... 449 00:18:47,894 --> 00:18:50,328 It looks like I'm never going to see you again. 450 00:18:50,363 --> 00:18:52,396 I can't really roll with the hero types. 451 00:18:52,432 --> 00:18:54,732 And I don't... they... They don't want me around. 452 00:18:54,767 --> 00:18:58,035 But I want you to know, even if I didn't show it at the time, 453 00:18:58,071 --> 00:19:00,738 I really appreciated you sticking by me. 454 00:19:00,773 --> 00:19:04,675 God damn it, why am I crying? It makes no sense. 455 00:19:04,711 --> 00:19:06,477 Ugh, you're... You're probably confused 456 00:19:06,513 --> 00:19:07,945 because we barely knew each other, 457 00:19:07,981 --> 00:19:09,780 but you really stuck your neck out 458 00:19:09,816 --> 00:19:10,926 when you gave me props for my awesome jokes 459 00:19:10,950 --> 00:19:12,750 in the briefing room. 460 00:19:12,785 --> 00:19:15,353 Everybody else had their head so far up their ass. 461 00:19:15,421 --> 00:19:16,888 Even my own grandson is like, 462 00:19:16,923 --> 00:19:18,856 "Oh, the Vindicators, they're so cool." 463 00:19:18,892 --> 00:19:21,993 I mean, he's a moron, that's their demographic. 464 00:19:22,028 --> 00:19:23,628 But you're different, Noob Noob. 465 00:19:23,663 --> 00:19:25,530 Mother 466 00:19:25,565 --> 00:19:27,865 You're cool. And you're smart. 467 00:19:27,901 --> 00:19:30,468 And I bet we coulda hung out and shit. 468 00:19:30,503 --> 00:19:32,703 And I hope you get to be a full-fledged Vindicator 469 00:19:32,739 --> 00:19:34,472 and... and do... Do me a favor, 470 00:19:34,507 --> 00:19:36,607 don't... don't let them know I-I got emotional. 471 00:19:36,643 --> 00:19:38,476 But you can tell them one thing. 472 00:19:38,511 --> 00:19:40,411 Tell them I said... 473 00:19:40,446 --> 00:19:43,948 Oh Okay. I just shit myself. Okay, later. 474 00:19:49,088 --> 00:19:51,455 W... Dude, Morty, what happened... Shut up. 475 00:19:53,493 --> 00:19:55,560 I sense this means we are not dying. 476 00:19:55,595 --> 00:19:56,861 Not all of us. 477 00:19:56,896 --> 00:19:58,429 Sweetheart. 478 00:19:58,464 --> 00:20:00,131 Just let Titty Bean do this, Snuzzles. 479 00:20:00,166 --> 00:20:01,465 It's for the greater good. 480 00:20:01,534 --> 00:20:02,500 Greater good? Titty Bean? 481 00:20:02,535 --> 00:20:04,035 It's like you said, Morty. 482 00:20:04,070 --> 00:20:06,170 There's no right or wrong... Never said that. 483 00:20:06,206 --> 00:20:09,106 It's the galaxy's faith in the Vindicators 484 00:20:09,142 --> 00:20:11,442 that keeps the galaxy secure. 485 00:20:11,477 --> 00:20:12,843 Yeah, I feel safer already. 486 00:20:12,879 --> 00:20:14,946 No doubt, who do we make the check out to? 487 00:20:14,981 --> 00:20:16,948 I will say we are getting some good licks in 488 00:20:16,983 --> 00:20:18,616 while choking to death... Right? 489 00:20:18,651 --> 00:20:20,184 Titty Bean. Listen to me. 490 00:20:20,220 --> 00:20:21,552 When you came to me, 491 00:20:21,588 --> 00:20:23,821 I was merely a sentient colony of ants. 492 00:20:23,856 --> 00:20:27,091 It was your beliefs, your pursuit of justice... 493 00:20:27,126 --> 00:20:28,859 that taught me to be a man. 494 00:20:30,096 --> 00:20:31,896 When did it get so complicated? 495 00:20:31,931 --> 00:20:34,599 Who knows. But we can make it simple again. 496 00:20:34,634 --> 00:20:36,534 You were always the romantic. 497 00:20:36,569 --> 00:20:38,636 Which is why you can't leave, either. 498 00:20:42,508 --> 00:20:44,609 I'm sorry, my love. 499 00:20:44,644 --> 00:20:47,245 Damn! She double-crossed Snuzzles! 500 00:20:47,280 --> 00:20:50,147 Silence! I'm going to enjoy this... 501 00:20:50,183 --> 00:20:52,984 Announcer: Let's give a huge thanks to Rick Sanchez 502 00:20:53,019 --> 00:20:55,264 for killing Worldender, putting this awesome party together, 503 00:20:55,288 --> 00:20:58,723 and for booking one of the hottest talents out there... 504 00:20:58,758 --> 00:21:02,526 Logic! Logic: Awe, yeah. 505 00:21:02,562 --> 00:21:03,861 Look at that. It's going down. 506 00:21:03,896 --> 00:21:05,529 Geez, I must have planned a whole party. 507 00:21:05,565 --> 00:21:07,176 - It's Logic, y'all. - Invited a bunch of people. 508 00:21:07,200 --> 00:21:08,677 - Not bad, Drunk Rick, not bad. - Shout out to my boy, Rick. 509 00:21:08,701 --> 00:21:10,568 Are you ready? 510 00:21:14,641 --> 00:21:17,074 Rick, Supernova's getting away. Eh, who cares? 511 00:21:17,110 --> 00:21:18,809 But... she was trying to kill us. 512 00:21:18,845 --> 00:21:20,489 Morty, 20 people try to kill me every week. 513 00:21:20,513 --> 00:21:21,857 I end up getting high with half of them. 514 00:21:21,881 --> 00:21:23,848 I mean, check it out, Gearhead's here. 515 00:21:25,251 --> 00:21:26,729 Hmm. Well, that's gonna shoot through me. 516 00:21:26,753 --> 00:21:28,686 Morty, you're wearing a Vindicator jacket. 517 00:21:28,721 --> 00:21:30,588 Are you a little superhero now? 518 00:21:30,623 --> 00:21:32,556 Everyone in the universe is a hero, Mom. 519 00:21:32,592 --> 00:21:33,936 Which is why we don't need jackets. 520 00:21:33,960 --> 00:21:35,760 And I'm pretty sure we don't need Vindicators. 521 00:21:35,795 --> 00:21:37,662 Don't mind if I do. 522 00:21:37,697 --> 00:21:40,097 Hey, everybody! Look who's a Vindicator! 523 00:21:40,133 --> 00:21:43,734 Man, Grandpa Rick must have gotten shitfaced. Shut up, Summer. 524 00:21:55,348 --> 00:21:57,181 Yo, it's Logic once again, y'all. 525 00:21:57,216 --> 00:21:58,649 Don't forget the name. 526 00:21:58,685 --> 00:22:00,017 Make sure you get home safe. 527 00:22:00,053 --> 00:22:01,664 And, man, we gotta all give it up for Rick, 528 00:22:01,688 --> 00:22:03,232 'cause, I mean, what kind of mother 529 00:22:03,256 --> 00:22:05,756 Just sets up a whole festival like this 530 00:22:05,792 --> 00:22:07,792 when he's completely loaded, man? 531 00:22:07,827 --> 00:22:11,228 And all that stuff I said about Vance, that's not real. 532 00:22:11,264 --> 00:22:14,298 Vance that guy, that guy sucks 533 00:22:14,334 --> 00:22:17,034 Whoo! 534 00:22:17,070 --> 00:22:18,869 Yeah! 535 00:22:18,905 --> 00:22:21,038 Yo... 536 00:22:21,074 --> 00:22:24,241 D-Did I get paid yet? Whoo! 537 00:22:26,312 --> 00:22:29,080 I can't believe we're getting Gear Cream with a Vindicator. 538 00:22:29,115 --> 00:22:33,184 So, you girls in Gear college or Gear... 539 00:22:33,219 --> 00:22:35,686 Alien terror attack! 540 00:22:35,722 --> 00:22:39,857 Okay. Sounds like a job for... me. 541 00:22:39,892 --> 00:22:43,160 I better go get into my alter ego. 542 00:22:43,196 --> 00:22:45,062 So cool. I know. 543 00:22:45,098 --> 00:22:46,997 Wait, what alter ego? 544 00:22:47,033 --> 00:22:48,799 He was already wearing the jacket. 545 00:22:51,137 --> 00:22:52,636 Gotta know when to hold 'em and... 546 00:22:52,672 --> 00:22:53,672 Aaaaah! 547 00:22:57,110 --> 00:22:58,409 Did you get any of that?