1 00:00:07,274 --> 00:00:10,344 Oh! Um, hey, Rick. 2 00:00:10,377 --> 00:00:12,079 I was wondering if you could help me out 3 00:00:12,112 --> 00:00:14,047 with a bit of a rake situation. 4 00:00:14,081 --> 00:00:15,583 A "rake situation"? 5 00:00:15,617 --> 00:00:18,285 Long story short, I asked Gene if he borrowed my rake, 6 00:00:18,318 --> 00:00:20,688 and he said, "No," like -- like that. Like, too fast. 7 00:00:20,722 --> 00:00:23,423 Like, faster than someone should know they don't have my rake. 8 00:00:23,457 --> 00:00:26,694 I think he has my rake, and I... 9 00:00:26,728 --> 00:00:28,328 I'm not going to murder Gene. 10 00:00:28,362 --> 00:00:30,965 Jerry, thank you for bringing me into The Rake Situation. 11 00:00:30,999 --> 00:00:32,432 I've done all I can. I'm out. 12 00:00:32,466 --> 00:00:33,467 No surprise there. 13 00:00:33,501 --> 00:00:35,770 All that brain, and you just waste it. 14 00:00:35,803 --> 00:00:37,070 H-Hold up. 15 00:00:37,104 --> 00:00:39,641 I-I waste my brain? Yeah, Rick. 16 00:00:39,674 --> 00:00:41,543 Obviously, you were born smarter than me, 17 00:00:41,576 --> 00:00:43,745 but if I had your brain -- If you had my... 18 00:00:43,778 --> 00:00:47,515 I am so sick of this "born smart" shit. Are you gonna kill me? 19 00:00:47,549 --> 00:00:50,018 I was born crying and pissing myself, just like you. 20 00:00:50,050 --> 00:00:51,586 Then I become the smartest man in the universe, 21 00:00:51,619 --> 00:00:52,921 and do I get credit? 22 00:00:52,954 --> 00:00:55,155 No, I get to check my brain privilege. 23 00:00:55,188 --> 00:00:56,290 So we're swapping bodies? 24 00:00:56,323 --> 00:00:57,825 No, that would be "Freaky Friday," 25 00:00:57,859 --> 00:00:59,861 which is the ceiling of your grasp of consciousness. 26 00:00:59,894 --> 00:01:02,964 The brain is part of the body, Jerry. It's hardware. 27 00:01:02,997 --> 00:01:05,132 I'm gonna put my mind in your brain 28 00:01:05,165 --> 00:01:06,701 and your mind in my brain. 29 00:01:06,734 --> 00:01:09,938 Then we'll see the real definition of "waste," Jerry. 30 00:01:09,971 --> 00:01:11,305 Or, you know, admit genius isn't random 31 00:01:11,338 --> 00:01:12,674 and your failures are your own. 32 00:01:12,707 --> 00:01:13,741 Oh, not doing that. 33 00:01:13,775 --> 00:01:15,375 Thought as much. 34 00:01:29,624 --> 00:01:30,658 Oh furck 35 00:01:30,692 --> 00:01:31,993 Oh, grod. 36 00:01:32,026 --> 00:01:34,194 Wait, no! 37 00:01:37,865 --> 00:01:40,835 Okay. Hold on. Hold on. 38 00:01:40,868 --> 00:01:42,670 Oh-ho-ho, whoa, whoa, whoa! 39 00:01:45,439 --> 00:01:48,776 Alright, Jerry, you can do this. 40 00:01:49,544 --> 00:01:51,144 Whoa! 41 00:01:56,050 --> 00:01:58,653 Medical emergency detected. 42 00:02:09,329 --> 00:02:12,399 There goes my Thursday. 43 00:02:48,770 --> 00:02:51,438 I'm telling you, man, you're making a big mistake here. 44 00:02:51,471 --> 00:02:53,841 Ha! Bigger mistake than being a criminal? 45 00:02:53,875 --> 00:02:55,342 I'm mistake-proof. 46 00:02:55,375 --> 00:02:57,912 Sorry to bother, boss. 47 00:02:57,945 --> 00:03:00,815 I caught this punk selling crystals on our turf -- 48 00:03:00,848 --> 00:03:03,518 You big, precious moron. 49 00:03:03,551 --> 00:03:05,653 D-Do you know who the fuck -- This is Morty. 50 00:03:05,687 --> 00:03:08,321 The kid who hangs with Rick Sanchez. 51 00:03:08,355 --> 00:03:10,658 Tried to warn you, man. Rick Sanchez? 52 00:03:10,692 --> 00:03:11,859 Underworld legend? 53 00:03:11,893 --> 00:03:13,628 Chaotic neutral sci-fi guy? Huh? 54 00:03:13,661 --> 00:03:15,530 Christ, he's gonna turn me into a sandwich. 55 00:03:15,563 --> 00:03:16,864 What is this guy, fuckin' new? 56 00:03:16,898 --> 00:03:18,566 Think he was a Dylan rec, boss. 57 00:03:18,599 --> 00:03:20,535 Well, check those fucking references next time. 58 00:03:20,568 --> 00:03:22,937 Whatever this kid wants to do in our territory 59 00:03:22,970 --> 00:03:24,038 is his business. 60 00:03:24,072 --> 00:03:25,372 Fuck. Fuck! Call my wife. 61 00:03:25,405 --> 00:03:27,575 We gotta prep go-bags three through six. 62 00:03:27,608 --> 00:03:29,510 Hey, pal. You good? You whole? 63 00:03:29,544 --> 00:03:31,112 Y-You guys have milkshakes? 64 00:03:31,145 --> 00:03:33,514 We will learn what they are and get you one. 65 00:03:39,219 --> 00:03:40,621 What a turn. 66 00:03:40,655 --> 00:03:42,890 Lucky I'm such a genius your garage can thwart death. 67 00:03:42,924 --> 00:03:45,593 I'm the genius, and it's your garage, idiot. 68 00:03:45,626 --> 00:03:48,462 Hey, what the fuck did you do to my body? Your body? 69 00:03:48,495 --> 00:03:51,833 Jerry, your mind did that to my body using my brain. 70 00:03:51,866 --> 00:03:55,302 Jerry, my mind was in this brain in your body. 71 00:03:55,335 --> 00:03:57,638 Pretty easy to follow. 72 00:03:57,672 --> 00:03:58,773 It shuffled us. 73 00:03:58,806 --> 00:04:01,042 Shuffled you maybe. I'm tracking everything. 74 00:04:01,075 --> 00:04:02,275 Garage? Fix this. 75 00:04:02,309 --> 00:04:04,078 Situation was fixed. 76 00:04:04,112 --> 00:04:05,412 You call this fixed? 77 00:04:05,445 --> 00:04:06,814 This guy thinks he's me. This guy thinks he's me. 78 00:04:06,848 --> 00:04:08,816 Let's see you fix it, then, asshole. 79 00:04:08,850 --> 00:04:10,118 I fucking will. 80 00:04:10,151 --> 00:04:12,053 I got my lab right here. Gimme three hours. 81 00:04:12,086 --> 00:04:14,689 Oh, sure, yeah, l-like I'd ever trust you to open my skull. 82 00:04:14,722 --> 00:04:17,625 I'll fix it. I just need to scan for -- Ow! 83 00:04:17,658 --> 00:04:20,194 Like I'd trust your fritzing R2-D2 ass. 84 00:04:20,228 --> 00:04:21,596 You'll just kill me on purpose. 85 00:04:21,629 --> 00:04:23,263 So that's where my paranoia went. 86 00:04:24,699 --> 00:04:26,433 Rick speaking. Who is this? 87 00:04:26,466 --> 00:04:29,203 Rick, it's Chuxly. From Crimetown. 88 00:04:29,237 --> 00:04:30,571 We've met 5 or 10 times. 89 00:04:30,605 --> 00:04:32,339 Listen, small misunderstanding. 90 00:04:32,372 --> 00:04:34,609 one of my guys saw your buddy Morty running an errand 91 00:04:34,642 --> 00:04:37,545 and he brought him in, which I told him not to do 92 00:04:37,578 --> 00:04:39,614 but I've got Morty, and he is fine. 93 00:04:39,647 --> 00:04:41,849 Wait, w-what? Aren't you describing kidnapping? 94 00:04:41,883 --> 00:04:43,350 - Morty's kidnapped? - No, no, no. 95 00:04:43,383 --> 00:04:44,786 Give me that, Jerry. Hello? Hello? 96 00:04:44,819 --> 00:04:46,621 This is Rick Sanchez. 97 00:04:46,654 --> 00:04:48,689 I'm using my son-in- law's vocal cords because I'm amazing. 98 00:04:48,723 --> 00:04:50,958 If you touch my grandson, I'm gonna -- 99 00:04:50,992 --> 00:04:53,060 Get -- Get off me. H-H-Hello? 100 00:04:53,094 --> 00:04:54,862 Jerry, stop. You're fucking this up. 101 00:04:54,896 --> 00:04:56,731 You're only calling me Jerry because you're so stupid 102 00:04:56,764 --> 00:04:58,966 you think it's hurtful, which it is. 103 00:04:59,000 --> 00:05:00,333 Tell me where you are. 104 00:05:00,367 --> 00:05:02,069 No, you tell them where they are, 105 00:05:02,103 --> 00:05:04,038 like Liam Neeson. Do not pretend 106 00:05:04,071 --> 00:05:06,040 to explain Liam Neeson to me. Sir. 107 00:05:06,073 --> 00:05:08,042 Hey, Jerry, don't touch me there. Stop it. 108 00:05:09,544 --> 00:05:11,212 We know where you are. We know where you are. 109 00:05:13,247 --> 00:05:15,049 My milkshake is empty! Okay! 110 00:05:15,082 --> 00:05:16,751 That was so embarrassing. 111 00:05:16,784 --> 00:05:18,119 Do you have any clue what a pain it is 112 00:05:18,152 --> 00:05:19,386 to cultivate a mystique? 113 00:05:19,419 --> 00:05:21,189 Yeah, I do. It's my mystique, 114 00:05:21,222 --> 00:05:23,456 and you're just cultivating Jerry's shame. 115 00:05:23,490 --> 00:05:25,492 What is with my hair? Leave it. Don't. 116 00:05:25,526 --> 00:05:27,161 Why do you care about hair, nerd? 117 00:05:27,195 --> 00:05:28,663 Be quiet for a second, 118 00:05:28,696 --> 00:05:30,430 I need to think through all these chunks of moron. 119 00:05:30,463 --> 00:05:32,266 Okay, you stay here. Touch nothing. 120 00:05:32,300 --> 00:05:33,534 I'll get Morty. Ha! 121 00:05:33,568 --> 00:05:35,002 I'm not letting you get Morty killed 122 00:05:35,036 --> 00:05:36,737 and our brains blown out twice. 123 00:05:36,771 --> 00:05:38,973 Car, electrocute Jerry if he gets in the front seat. 124 00:05:39,006 --> 00:05:41,642 Car, engage castration protocol right now. 125 00:05:41,676 --> 00:05:43,644 Figure out how to drive me together 126 00:05:43,678 --> 00:05:47,181 or I will have to kill you both. 127 00:05:47,215 --> 00:05:49,717 Ugh! What are we, a 1930s comedy act? 128 00:05:49,750 --> 00:05:51,586 Stop swerving. You're swerving. 129 00:05:51,619 --> 00:05:53,788 Alright, when we get there, let me do the talking. 130 00:05:53,821 --> 00:05:55,756 Yeah, I know, because you look the most like us. 131 00:05:55,790 --> 00:05:58,491 I'm not stupid. Ho-ho! I beg to differ. 132 00:05:58,526 --> 00:05:59,694 Screw you, Half Jerry. 133 00:05:59,727 --> 00:06:01,494 You're a Half Jerry! You're a Half Jerry! 134 00:06:04,298 --> 00:06:06,100 Looks like he's inbound, boss. 135 00:06:06,133 --> 00:06:08,135 Okay, he is in a bad mood, 136 00:06:08,169 --> 00:06:11,239 so we are kissing ass until our lips are ass-colored. 137 00:06:11,272 --> 00:06:12,640 Straighten that pillow. 138 00:06:12,673 --> 00:06:14,474 He might hate crooked pillows. I don't know. 139 00:06:16,310 --> 00:06:19,614 Nice parking job, assdick. You scratched my car. 140 00:06:19,647 --> 00:06:21,048 Rick! 141 00:06:21,082 --> 00:06:23,618 And -- And, uh, Rick's friend. 142 00:06:23,651 --> 00:06:25,887 This is my...assassin. 143 00:06:25,920 --> 00:06:28,890 Deadliest man in the galaxy, and he's gay. Why am I gay? 144 00:06:28,923 --> 00:06:31,859 Whoa. Hey. Whoa. Why aren't you? Sorry about that. 145 00:06:31,893 --> 00:06:32,827 Sorry. Sorry. 146 00:06:32,860 --> 00:06:34,494 Well, I got Morty right here, 147 00:06:34,528 --> 00:06:36,130 happy as a milkshake. 148 00:06:36,163 --> 00:06:37,798 And since we interrupted your day, 149 00:06:37,832 --> 00:06:39,634 Morty's got 10,000 croutons. 150 00:06:39,667 --> 00:06:41,535 That's slang for crystals. Morty, show him. 151 00:06:41,569 --> 00:06:43,204 We know what croutons are. Ey! Tsh. 152 00:06:43,237 --> 00:06:44,338 Why is Dad here? 153 00:06:44,372 --> 00:06:46,574 Your Dad's a gay assassin? 154 00:06:46,607 --> 00:06:49,677 So cool and ordinary. Sorry. S-Sorry. 155 00:06:49,710 --> 00:06:51,478 I appreciate you trying to make good, 156 00:06:51,512 --> 00:06:53,147 but you cost me 10 times that much. 157 00:06:53,180 --> 00:06:54,548 It doesn't matter, Rick. 158 00:06:54,582 --> 00:06:55,983 The guy's already kissing your ass. 159 00:06:56,017 --> 00:06:57,885 It's the ass kissers you have to keep in line. 160 00:06:57,919 --> 00:06:59,486 When they sense weakness, they move on you. 161 00:06:59,520 --> 00:07:00,988 What are we, Walter White? 162 00:07:01,022 --> 00:07:03,557 Who cares if a mid-tier crime dork "moves" on us? 163 00:07:03,591 --> 00:07:05,826 Thank you for the crystals. Morty, get in the car. 164 00:07:05,860 --> 00:07:08,396 Actually, Morty, why don't you leave those crystals here 165 00:07:08,428 --> 00:07:10,698 since it's such an insulting amount. 166 00:07:10,731 --> 00:07:11,933 There it is. 167 00:07:11,966 --> 00:07:13,701 Now he's thinking, "Oh, maybe I can kill God." 168 00:07:13,734 --> 00:07:15,102 Yeah, because God doesn't haggle 169 00:07:15,136 --> 00:07:17,171 for 10,000 fucking croutons. 170 00:07:17,204 --> 00:07:18,372 Look, here's the deal. 171 00:07:18,406 --> 00:07:19,807 I'm Rick, that's my son-in-law, 172 00:07:19,840 --> 00:07:21,575 and we're all a little gay. 173 00:07:21,609 --> 00:07:22,977 -Yeah. -It's a spectrum. 174 00:07:23,010 --> 00:07:25,445 Morty, it's me, Rick. Get in the car. 175 00:07:25,478 --> 00:07:26,714 Don't get in the car, Morty. 176 00:07:26,747 --> 00:07:28,182 And put the briefcase down. 177 00:07:28,215 --> 00:07:29,717 Morty, get in the car twice, 178 00:07:29,750 --> 00:07:31,385 once for each five additional briefcases 179 00:07:31,419 --> 00:07:32,753 this asshole owes us. 180 00:07:32,787 --> 00:07:34,789 Stop doing this terrible impression of me! 181 00:07:34,822 --> 00:07:36,489 Look, at this point, we're bad gangsters 182 00:07:36,524 --> 00:07:37,625 if we don't roll the dice. 183 00:07:37,658 --> 00:07:39,293 Everybody, start killing 'em! 184 00:07:40,761 --> 00:07:42,229 What have you two assholes done? 185 00:07:42,263 --> 00:07:44,165 It's okay. It's a nice restaurant. 186 00:07:44,198 --> 00:07:46,567 Whoa. Shit! Crime restaurant! 187 00:07:46,600 --> 00:07:48,869 Oh, my God! Am I really about to die 188 00:07:48,903 --> 00:07:51,038 because you botched a "Freaky Friday"? Yes.Yes. 189 00:07:51,072 --> 00:07:52,472 Whoever you are, you're in Rick's body. 190 00:07:52,506 --> 00:07:53,674 Use your implants. 191 00:07:53,708 --> 00:07:55,276 I'm trying. Half my brain is the guy 192 00:07:55,309 --> 00:07:57,878 that still needs your mom to use the electric wine opener. 193 00:07:57,912 --> 00:08:00,815 H-Hang on. I think I got it. 194 00:08:02,350 --> 00:08:03,918 Right, from my Conehead phase. 195 00:08:03,951 --> 00:08:06,320 Awesome fucking movie. Incredible cast. 196 00:08:06,354 --> 00:08:07,521 God damn it. 197 00:08:07,555 --> 00:08:09,357 I'm shooting my way back to the car. 198 00:08:09,390 --> 00:08:10,658 Ugh, way to go. 199 00:08:10,691 --> 00:08:12,793 Now my son and grandson hates us. 200 00:08:12,827 --> 00:08:15,096 He's my son and grandson, too. 201 00:08:15,129 --> 00:08:18,599 Huh. We do share an agenda, in that sense. 202 00:08:18,632 --> 00:08:21,035 Let's hope you share my aim. 203 00:08:22,770 --> 00:08:25,272 ♪ Fall is here, hear the yell ♪ 204 00:08:25,306 --> 00:08:27,808 ♪ Back to school, ring the bell ♪ 205 00:08:27,842 --> 00:08:30,444 ♪ Brand new shoes, walking blues ♪ 206 00:08:30,478 --> 00:08:32,847 ♪ Climb the fence, books and pens ♪ 207 00:08:32,880 --> 00:08:35,649 ♪ I can tell that we are gonna be friends ♪ 208 00:08:35,683 --> 00:08:36,984 Hey, get up here! 209 00:08:37,018 --> 00:08:39,220 Said the throat to the hand. Oh! Oh! 210 00:08:40,454 --> 00:08:42,256 You might feel a pinch and maybe a rocket. 211 00:08:42,289 --> 00:08:44,525 You'll have to aim. Hop on! 212 00:08:46,961 --> 00:08:50,498 ♪ I can tell that we are gonna be friends ♪ 213 00:08:52,033 --> 00:08:55,803 ♪ I can tell that we are gonna be friends ♪ 214 00:08:55,836 --> 00:08:58,239 You Coneheaded son of a bitch. 215 00:08:58,272 --> 00:08:59,407 Can't believe that worked. 216 00:08:59,440 --> 00:09:01,008 I wish they did that in the movie. 217 00:09:01,042 --> 00:09:02,910 Jesus fucking Christ. 218 00:09:02,943 --> 00:09:04,945 Huh, should've done something with my hands. 219 00:09:04,979 --> 00:09:07,982 Morty, gotta push or pull. Your call. 220 00:09:11,786 --> 00:09:13,320 What the hell? What happened? 221 00:09:13,354 --> 00:09:15,956 T-They made us stop at every drive-thru chain in the galaxy, 222 00:09:15,990 --> 00:09:17,825 so they could make one giant burger 223 00:09:17,858 --> 00:09:19,427 with a patty from each place. 224 00:09:19,460 --> 00:09:20,828 I guess I meant before that. 225 00:09:20,861 --> 00:09:22,329 Brains got a little mixed up. 226 00:09:22,363 --> 00:09:23,831 But we're gonna swap back. Don't worry. 227 00:09:23,864 --> 00:09:25,733 Just didn't wanna build a neural interface 228 00:09:25,766 --> 00:09:27,368 on an empty stomach, right? 229 00:09:27,401 --> 00:09:28,936 Wait, you guys did a brain swap? 230 00:09:28,969 --> 00:09:30,838 Don't bother chiding until they're unshuffled, 231 00:09:30,871 --> 00:09:32,940 neither one is Dad or Rick. 232 00:09:32,973 --> 00:09:34,108 Huh. 233 00:09:34,141 --> 00:09:37,478 I guess I'm thrilled you guys are getting along? 234 00:09:37,512 --> 00:09:39,180 Let's keep that going 235 00:09:39,213 --> 00:09:41,816 when those brains get back in their bodies. 236 00:09:41,849 --> 00:09:44,051 Whoa, going for the electro-pneumatic diodes. 237 00:09:44,085 --> 00:09:46,387 Wild man. Only gonna build this once. 238 00:09:46,420 --> 00:09:48,089 Gotta do it with style. 239 00:09:48,122 --> 00:09:50,491 I think we can up the wattage. 240 00:09:50,525 --> 00:09:52,126 Hey, another beer? 241 00:09:52,159 --> 00:09:54,261 It's about the journey, brother. Ah, Rick used to hate 242 00:09:54,295 --> 00:09:56,897 that kind of hang-loose McConaughey platitude, 243 00:09:56,931 --> 00:09:59,867 but he was also just gonna spend today grumpy and isolated. 244 00:09:59,900 --> 00:10:01,902 And Jerry'd still be hung up about the rake. 245 00:10:01,936 --> 00:10:04,205 The rake. Oh, my God, should we do it? 246 00:10:04,238 --> 00:10:05,507 W-We've gotta do it. 247 00:10:05,540 --> 00:10:07,241 Oh, yeah. 248 00:10:07,274 --> 00:10:09,376 Alright, that should do it. 249 00:10:14,882 --> 00:10:16,450 Whoa. 250 00:10:16,484 --> 00:10:19,386 Son of a bitch. Classic Gene. Huh. 251 00:10:19,420 --> 00:10:20,788 Crazy. T-This is the kind of thing 252 00:10:20,821 --> 00:10:22,089 that used to really piss me off. 253 00:10:22,123 --> 00:10:24,492 Yeah. Now it's just kinda funny. 254 00:10:24,526 --> 00:10:27,862 Ooh, you wanna replace it with a holographic rake? Oh, that'd be fun. 255 00:10:27,895 --> 00:10:29,663 He'd get confused trying to pick it up. 256 00:10:29,697 --> 00:10:32,500 Eh. I guess I don't even wanna do that. 257 00:10:32,534 --> 00:10:35,402 I just want to live. I want Gene to live. 258 00:10:35,436 --> 00:10:37,071 I want all of us to make mistakes 259 00:10:37,104 --> 00:10:39,974 and change all the time. Amen to that, brother. 260 00:10:40,007 --> 00:10:42,810 Kinda thought two geniuses would build faster than one. 261 00:10:42,843 --> 00:10:45,012 When do I start being concerned about this? 262 00:10:45,045 --> 00:10:47,348 Just having a little fun with my new friend, sweetie. 263 00:10:47,381 --> 00:10:48,482 Who is talking to me right now? 264 00:10:48,517 --> 00:10:50,784 Mostly my dad or mostly my husband? 265 00:10:50,818 --> 00:10:52,319 Oof, I've been on that website. 266 00:10:52,353 --> 00:10:53,555 Look, I've been patient, 267 00:10:53,588 --> 00:10:56,558 but I can't tell how to get mad at who. 268 00:10:56,591 --> 00:10:59,727 No one enters my room or touches me until this is wrapped up. 269 00:10:59,760 --> 00:11:02,363 Eww. What do you take me for? Ugh, Beth, gross, ugh. 270 00:11:05,866 --> 00:11:07,902 I want you to know, when this is over, 271 00:11:07,935 --> 00:11:09,803 the guy in this body is gonna yell at Jerry 272 00:11:09,837 --> 00:11:11,138 and call him useless. 273 00:11:11,172 --> 00:11:12,072 Really lay into him. 274 00:11:12,106 --> 00:11:13,575 But he won't always mean it. 275 00:11:13,608 --> 00:11:15,809 Well, cards on the table, the guy in this body 276 00:11:15,843 --> 00:11:18,279 might call Rick an angry old asshole. 277 00:11:18,312 --> 00:11:21,682 But he's the closest thing Jerry has to a friend. 278 00:11:21,715 --> 00:11:23,050 This was fun. 279 00:11:23,083 --> 00:11:25,252 Rick would never have been able to admit that. 280 00:11:25,286 --> 00:11:26,820 Yeah. It's a shame 281 00:11:26,854 --> 00:11:29,323 those guys had to become us to be happy. 282 00:11:39,466 --> 00:11:40,901 Kids, breakfast and school. 283 00:11:40,935 --> 00:11:42,269 If we don't at least pretend they matter, 284 00:11:42,303 --> 00:11:43,470 everything falls apart. 285 00:11:45,172 --> 00:11:46,340 Jerry? 286 00:11:46,373 --> 00:11:48,242 Dad? 287 00:11:48,275 --> 00:11:49,644 Th-They left a note. 288 00:11:49,678 --> 00:11:52,012 Should we read it in Rick's voice or Dad's? 289 00:11:52,046 --> 00:11:54,048 "Dear family, we thought about leaving a note. 290 00:11:54,081 --> 00:11:56,383 But then one of us was like, 'Why are we leaving a note?' 291 00:11:56,417 --> 00:11:58,085 That's such a Jerry thing to do. 292 00:11:58,118 --> 00:12:00,254 But if we didn't leave a note, that's such a Rick thing to do. 293 00:12:00,287 --> 00:12:02,223 And then we realized, we just gotta be us. 294 00:12:02,256 --> 00:12:05,893 So it's a note but it's not really well thought out." 295 00:12:05,926 --> 00:12:08,362 That's it? They got out a pen and a paper for this? 296 00:12:08,395 --> 00:12:10,931 Hey, did you guys get a note, too? 297 00:12:10,965 --> 00:12:12,366 Mine's really long. 298 00:12:15,102 --> 00:12:17,137 Beautiful day to be carrying glass, huh? 299 00:12:17,171 --> 00:12:19,940 I can't believe a dying kid would wish for a window. 300 00:12:19,974 --> 00:12:21,543 Damn it! 301 00:12:21,576 --> 00:12:23,978 Hey! Stop them! They stole our crystals! 302 00:12:24,011 --> 00:12:25,479 Yeah! We stole those first! 303 00:12:25,513 --> 00:12:28,249 Possession is 9/10 of my ass! 304 00:12:29,984 --> 00:12:31,418 Look at this pancake butt. 305 00:12:31,452 --> 00:12:33,354 Stop. You're gonna make me fart. 306 00:12:40,894 --> 00:12:42,763 Hey! That's for sipping! 307 00:12:42,796 --> 00:12:45,032 So are my balls. Here's a tip, lady. 308 00:12:45,065 --> 00:12:47,334 Life tastes better when you're chugging. 309 00:12:53,807 --> 00:12:55,042 You were in a tree? 310 00:12:55,075 --> 00:12:56,511 Really gambled on this escape route. 311 00:12:56,544 --> 00:12:58,912 Says the guy with a goon on his back. 312 00:13:01,048 --> 00:13:02,249 Forget it, Burger. 313 00:13:02,283 --> 00:13:04,418 It's our calling card. 314 00:13:06,954 --> 00:13:08,989 Oh, r-really called that one. 315 00:13:09,023 --> 00:13:11,526 Eh, one of us always gets shot. 316 00:13:14,828 --> 00:13:16,363 God damn it. 317 00:13:16,397 --> 00:13:20,234 Hey. You'll never guess who just ripped us off. 318 00:13:21,468 --> 00:13:23,370 Oh, wow. Good guess. 319 00:13:23,404 --> 00:13:25,005 - Whoa! - Oh, man. 320 00:13:25,039 --> 00:13:27,207 24 crystal heists in 24 hours! 321 00:13:27,241 --> 00:13:29,043 We're two farts in the wind, baby! 322 00:13:29,076 --> 00:13:31,378 Yeaahh! Do your Howard Dean scream. 323 00:13:31,412 --> 00:13:32,813 Yeaahh! 324 00:13:32,846 --> 00:13:36,483 5:00 somewhere. 5:00 somewhere. 325 00:13:36,518 --> 00:13:37,851 God damn, look at us. 326 00:13:37,885 --> 00:13:40,087 No rules. No responsibilities. 327 00:13:40,120 --> 00:13:41,989 Just two best friends on the run. 328 00:13:42,022 --> 00:13:43,792 Yeaahh! Yeaahh! 329 00:13:43,824 --> 00:13:46,327 The voice mailbox for... 330 00:13:46,360 --> 00:13:48,429 Uh, wait. Wait, wait, wait. Did it beep? 331 00:13:48,462 --> 00:13:49,631 Uh, my name is Jer-- 332 00:13:49,664 --> 00:13:51,098 ...is full. Goodbye. 333 00:13:51,131 --> 00:13:53,133 Looks like we just missed them. 334 00:13:53,167 --> 00:13:56,170 So they just stick burgers in dead guy's mouths now? 335 00:13:56,203 --> 00:13:58,305 In dead criminal's mouths, Summer. 336 00:13:58,339 --> 00:13:59,708 You're defending them? 337 00:13:59,741 --> 00:14:01,308 Well, they were my husband and father. 338 00:14:01,342 --> 00:14:03,143 Thanks for the tip, Blarb. It's weird. 339 00:14:03,177 --> 00:14:05,045 Most of my underworld contacts are ghosting me. 340 00:14:05,079 --> 00:14:06,781 My pleasure, Morty. 341 00:14:06,815 --> 00:14:09,249 I should be thanking you for making me rich. 342 00:14:09,283 --> 00:14:11,352 Wait. I-I didn't pay you for this. 343 00:14:11,385 --> 00:14:12,853 Yeah, these guys did. 344 00:14:19,326 --> 00:14:22,831 What's the problem, kid? Conehead got your tongue? 345 00:14:22,863 --> 00:14:25,132 Ch-Ch-Chuxly? You're alive? 346 00:14:26,066 --> 00:14:27,434 Did this guy always have a hole, 347 00:14:27,468 --> 00:14:28,869 or is that a big reveal? 348 00:14:31,305 --> 00:14:33,340 Yeehaw! Everything should be in a swamp. 349 00:14:33,374 --> 00:14:36,110 Working with y'all was a plum-fool idea. 350 00:14:36,143 --> 00:14:38,278 Burger & Fries. Who the hell is this? 351 00:14:38,312 --> 00:14:40,648 Just an average mid-tier crime dork. 352 00:14:40,682 --> 00:14:42,216 Chuxly? You're alive? 353 00:14:42,249 --> 00:14:44,586 Shut up. I got something you might wanna hear. 354 00:14:44,619 --> 00:14:47,421 Caught your family out looking for you. 355 00:14:47,454 --> 00:14:50,157 What do you want? We've smoked most of what we stole. 356 00:14:50,190 --> 00:14:52,627 I just want you, both of you. 357 00:14:52,660 --> 00:14:55,162 Or I smoke your family. 358 00:14:55,195 --> 00:14:57,164 Eh, what am I saying? Sure, bring money, too. 359 00:14:57,197 --> 00:14:59,032 One hour. 360 00:14:59,066 --> 00:15:02,369 Shit. Guess we should shoot the fuel tank, huh? 361 00:15:03,538 --> 00:15:07,408 You guys coulda done that the whole time? 362 00:15:17,384 --> 00:15:21,656 So. What now? 363 00:15:21,689 --> 00:15:23,792 Hey, remember how we met? 364 00:15:23,825 --> 00:15:26,927 That non-rescue of Morty? 365 00:15:26,960 --> 00:15:28,797 We were thinking we were different 366 00:15:28,830 --> 00:15:31,866 and -- and accusing each other of being bad, 367 00:15:31,900 --> 00:15:35,670 but Morty reminded us we both love our family. 368 00:15:35,703 --> 00:15:38,472 And it brought us together. 369 00:15:39,774 --> 00:15:41,341 Let's do this. 370 00:15:41,375 --> 00:15:43,745 Well, if we're gonna do it right, 371 00:15:43,778 --> 00:15:47,147 we might as well use our best idea. 372 00:15:47,181 --> 00:15:49,684 You guys comfortable? No? Good. 373 00:15:49,717 --> 00:15:51,285 Who are you? What is this place? 374 00:15:51,318 --> 00:15:53,387 And does my son sell drugs for my father? 375 00:15:53,420 --> 00:15:55,590 Hm, maybe criminals will actually be honest with me. 376 00:15:55,623 --> 00:15:57,024 Crystals can be anything, Mom. 377 00:15:57,057 --> 00:15:59,627 Yeah, but these crystals are drugs. Morty! 378 00:16:01,195 --> 00:16:02,931 Here we go, boys. This is it. 379 00:16:02,963 --> 00:16:04,599 - Jerry? - Rick? 380 00:16:04,632 --> 00:16:06,400 Grandpa? Jesus Christ. 381 00:16:06,433 --> 00:16:10,003 - Morty. Summer. Daughterwife. - You are safe now. 382 00:16:10,037 --> 00:16:13,207 Holy shit. All the positive aspects of each, 383 00:16:13,240 --> 00:16:14,975 perfectly melded together? 384 00:16:15,008 --> 00:16:18,278 Yes. I am Jerricky. Wa-chah! 385 00:16:18,312 --> 00:16:21,148 Alright, boys, nothing could have prepared us for this. 386 00:16:21,181 --> 00:16:23,751 At this point we gotta shoot and hope. 387 00:16:23,785 --> 00:16:26,788 Also, everything's flammable. 388 00:16:41,101 --> 00:16:42,704 Hey, guys, little help? 389 00:16:52,847 --> 00:16:55,215 Gotta split? 390 00:16:56,584 --> 00:16:57,785 I'm sorry, Chux. 391 00:16:57,819 --> 00:16:59,954 I started this. It's all my fault. 392 00:16:59,988 --> 00:17:01,221 Solid apology, new guy. 393 00:17:01,255 --> 00:17:03,591 If we live through this, you're off the hook. 394 00:17:06,460 --> 00:17:07,729 Nice shot, Morty. 395 00:17:07,762 --> 00:17:09,697 Eh, everything's flammable. 396 00:17:12,199 --> 00:17:14,401 Aghh. What a family. 397 00:17:16,036 --> 00:17:17,371 You got shot? No, no, no. 398 00:17:17,404 --> 00:17:19,874 The stitches, they never really set. 399 00:17:19,908 --> 00:17:22,042 What can I say? I'm a workaholic. 400 00:17:23,945 --> 00:17:26,113 Agh. I knew this day would come. 401 00:17:26,146 --> 00:17:28,282 Chuxly, this is a good death. 402 00:17:28,315 --> 00:17:30,818 You sought mastery over your world. 403 00:17:30,852 --> 00:17:33,353 No, no. I-I-I stepped out of line. 404 00:17:33,387 --> 00:17:36,356 I thought I could kill God. 405 00:17:36,390 --> 00:17:39,159 Being a boss in a crime world -- oof. 406 00:17:39,192 --> 00:17:40,929 So much stress. 407 00:17:40,962 --> 00:17:42,964 Honestly, Jerricky, it's a relief 408 00:17:42,997 --> 00:17:45,733 to die in your four arms. 409 00:17:45,767 --> 00:17:47,735 Final meal? 410 00:17:49,303 --> 00:17:51,338 Mmm, mm. 411 00:17:51,371 --> 00:17:53,908 How -- H-How old is this? 412 00:18:02,182 --> 00:18:04,351 Can we turn on the radio? 413 00:18:04,384 --> 00:18:06,119 At this point, I'd even take a podcast. 414 00:18:06,153 --> 00:18:10,658 Do you not hear the symphony of atoms dying in space? 415 00:18:12,092 --> 00:18:14,227 Um, no? 416 00:18:18,131 --> 00:18:20,467 Good. You are here. 417 00:18:20,500 --> 00:18:22,770 I have modified the house defenses. 418 00:18:22,804 --> 00:18:26,473 They will ensure the mob never bothers you again. 419 00:18:26,507 --> 00:18:28,776 Oh. Thanks. 420 00:18:28,810 --> 00:18:30,310 This is killing me. 421 00:18:30,344 --> 00:18:32,212 I-I thought when you came to rescue us 422 00:18:32,245 --> 00:18:33,681 you learned to love us more than ever. 423 00:18:33,715 --> 00:18:35,049 Y-You learned the opposite? 424 00:18:35,083 --> 00:18:37,384 Burger & Fries learned to love each other, 425 00:18:37,417 --> 00:18:40,487 then sacrificed themselves out of love for you. 426 00:18:40,521 --> 00:18:43,524 I am Jerricky, and I only need to love myself. 427 00:18:43,558 --> 00:18:45,893 You can't actually be leaving, right? 428 00:18:45,927 --> 00:18:47,494 Like the crows thing? 429 00:18:47,528 --> 00:18:49,530 They're my dad and grandpa. Y-You can't just take them. 430 00:18:49,564 --> 00:18:51,666 Your dad and grandpa are dead, Morty. 431 00:18:51,699 --> 00:18:54,902 They died arguing with each other about their brains. 432 00:18:56,037 --> 00:18:57,905 'Scuse me. Are -- Are you Jerry? 433 00:18:57,939 --> 00:19:00,008 Sorry, you have one of his heads. 434 00:19:00,041 --> 00:19:01,676 I am Jerricky. 435 00:19:01,709 --> 00:19:04,277 May as well have your rake back, then. 436 00:19:04,311 --> 00:19:05,880 That's right. I took it. 437 00:19:05,913 --> 00:19:08,783 I ask myself, "Why lie about it? Don't you think he knows? 438 00:19:08,816 --> 00:19:10,985 Couldn't I get my own?" Of course I could've, 439 00:19:11,019 --> 00:19:14,689 but God damn it, this rake, it kept my neighbors in my life. 440 00:19:14,722 --> 00:19:17,324 You guys don't give a Goddamn shit about Gene. 441 00:19:17,357 --> 00:19:20,695 But I see that won't help me any longer. 442 00:19:20,728 --> 00:19:22,063 Here. 443 00:19:22,096 --> 00:19:24,431 You are no longer obligated in such a way. 444 00:19:24,464 --> 00:19:26,400 I'm gonna give it back anyway. 445 00:19:26,433 --> 00:19:28,770 Just seems like the right thing to do. 446 00:19:28,803 --> 00:19:30,337 Okay. 447 00:19:36,644 --> 00:19:37,612 -Aw. -Aw. -Oh shit. 448 00:19:37,645 --> 00:19:39,814 You think a rake will change my mind? 449 00:19:39,847 --> 00:19:41,448 Well, it's fucking lame, okay? 450 00:19:41,481 --> 00:19:43,151 Both of you walking out on Mom? 451 00:19:43,183 --> 00:19:46,621 I thought you had two sets of balls, not zero. 452 00:19:46,654 --> 00:19:48,321 Our balls are adeq-- 453 00:19:48,355 --> 00:19:50,591 Morty, we're still in here! 454 00:19:50,625 --> 00:19:52,426 There's a memory of myself as a 30-year-old. 455 00:19:52,459 --> 00:19:54,562 He kept our egos intact. He saved us. 456 00:19:54,595 --> 00:19:56,130 It was a whole action movie, Morty. 457 00:19:56,164 --> 00:19:57,397 Memory Rick, he's still trapped in here. 458 00:19:57,431 --> 00:19:59,567 Quick, tackle this fucking thing! 459 00:19:59,600 --> 00:20:01,936 Garage! Garage! Help us! Hold him down! Hold him down! 460 00:20:04,438 --> 00:20:07,041 Nicely prepared eggs. 461 00:20:07,075 --> 00:20:09,342 I still can't taste anything. 462 00:20:09,376 --> 00:20:10,545 Awesome adventure, Rick. 463 00:20:10,578 --> 00:20:11,879 Jerry, being shuffled with me 464 00:20:11,913 --> 00:20:14,214 was probably the best part of your sad existence. 465 00:20:14,247 --> 00:20:15,550 A brush with greatness. 466 00:20:15,583 --> 00:20:17,685 Please, like you didn't get an upgrade. 467 00:20:17,719 --> 00:20:19,787 What was it like having integrity for once? 468 00:20:19,821 --> 00:20:22,557 Hey, Beth, how much integrity is left on the mortgage? 469 00:20:22,590 --> 00:20:24,291 I-I think it's clear you both love each other 470 00:20:24,324 --> 00:20:25,760 more than you're willing to admit. 471 00:20:25,793 --> 00:20:27,995 Dumb. Fucking dumb. Go pick up crystals for me. 472 00:20:28,029 --> 00:20:29,463 You don't have to do that, Morty. 473 00:20:29,496 --> 00:20:32,100 No, it's -- it's okay. I-I like doing it. 474 00:20:32,133 --> 00:20:34,468 Welp, those horses won't sew themselves up, 475 00:20:34,502 --> 00:20:37,237 but good to have you both back. Yeah. Whatever. 476 00:20:37,270 --> 00:20:39,607 Great, so I still wind up stuck with Jerry's dumb ass? 477 00:20:39,640 --> 00:20:42,076 Oh, fuck you. Eat your eggs that my wife bought. 478 00:20:42,110 --> 00:20:43,410 How about you eat my shit, 479 00:20:43,443 --> 00:20:44,679 you Hawaiian-shirt-loving twat? 480 00:20:44,712 --> 00:20:46,647 Uncalled for! Rude and uncalled for! 481 00:20:46,681 --> 00:20:48,549 You sit there with your potty mouth 482 00:20:48,583 --> 00:20:50,118 and do everything but help. Jerry, it's not my fault 483 00:20:50,151 --> 00:20:51,853 that nobody respects you in here. Oh, yeah. 484 00:20:51,886 --> 00:20:53,121 Your own kids think -- You could help, but you don't. 485 00:20:53,154 --> 00:20:54,421 I was busy, Jerry. 486 00:20:54,454 --> 00:20:55,757 I was working on something very important. 487 00:20:55,790 --> 00:20:57,625 ♪ Brand new shoes, walking blues ♪ 488 00:20:57,658 --> 00:21:00,027 ♪ Climb the fence, books and pens ♪ 489 00:21:00,061 --> 00:21:04,899 ♪ I can tell that we are gonna be friends ♪ 490 00:21:04,932 --> 00:21:09,469 ♪ I can tell that we are gonna be friends ♪ 491 00:21:12,540 --> 00:21:15,342 ♪ Walk with me, Suzy Lee ♪ 492 00:21:15,375 --> 00:21:17,678 ♪ Through the park and by the tree ♪ 493 00:21:17,712 --> 00:21:19,847 ♪ We will rest upon the ground ♪ 494 00:21:19,881 --> 00:21:22,583 ♪ And look at all the bugs we found ♪ 495 00:21:22,617 --> 00:21:25,953 ♪ Safely walk to school without a sound ♪ 496 00:21:27,320 --> 00:21:32,392 ♪ Safely walk to school without a sound ♪ 497 00:21:32,425 --> 00:21:37,464 ♪ I can tell that we are gonna be friends ♪ 498 00:21:37,497 --> 00:21:42,103 ♪ I can tell that we are gonna be friends ♪ 499 00:21:42,136 --> 00:21:44,739 And of course, there's a space shuttles. 500 00:21:44,772 --> 00:21:47,575 Can you believe that giant thing actually flies? 501 00:21:47,608 --> 00:21:49,844 Well, of course it can. It's a space shuttles. 502 00:21:49,877 --> 00:21:53,114 And over here is some stuff about Thomas Jefferson. 503 00:21:53,147 --> 00:21:55,216 Come on, students. 504 00:21:55,249 --> 00:21:59,687 Day 8 of attempting to escape Jerry's mind. 505 00:21:59,720 --> 00:22:02,256 It has become increasingly clear my daughter married a man 506 00:22:02,290 --> 00:22:07,061 who remembers all technology as powered by springs and gears. 507 00:22:07,094 --> 00:22:08,395 How did I get here? 508 00:22:08,428 --> 00:22:09,864 I suspect a chunk of Rick's brain 509 00:22:09,897 --> 00:22:12,767 got merged with a chunk of Jerry's. 510 00:22:12,800 --> 00:22:15,837 But did Rick maroon me by accident? 511 00:22:15,870 --> 00:22:17,705 Or on purpose? 512 00:22:17,738 --> 00:22:22,810 Escape remains possible but increasingly unlikely. 513 00:22:24,912 --> 00:22:26,314 Oh, hey, Memory Rick. 514 00:22:26,346 --> 00:22:28,415 Building more sculptures out of springs and gears? 515 00:22:28,448 --> 00:22:30,718 Fuck off, Memory Gene. 516 00:22:32,153 --> 00:22:33,688 Did you get any of that?