-Good
-Good evening,
-Good evening, everybody,
-"Whose Line Is It Anyway?"
On tonight's show,
like a home-cooked meal,
Comfort food,
He's what's for dessert --
And fried bologna --
And I'm Aisha Tyler.
[ Cheers and applause ]
Hey, everybody. Welcome.
Welcome to
the show where
and the points don't matter.
We've got a great show
And we're gonna get started
that is entitled
This is for all four
Gentlemen, come towards me.
Gary is appearing
Ryan, Colin, and Wayne are
he will pick them and end
Now, each of them has been given
a strange characteristic
Gary is gonna question them
about their suitability
and in the process,
who these nut balls are.
So, if you're all ready, Gary,
off you go and make a date.
-Number One, sometimes if
I buy a lizard neck sweater.
What's your favorite way
-I'm glad you asked.
[ Laughter ]
In fact, I'm thinking maybe
who'd like to walk
[ Audience whooping ]
To be able to let
down your glistening ebony
down to your rippling 28 pack,
down to the no-man's-zone
You know what,
I'm shutting the [Bleep] up.
[ Laughter and applause ]
-Okay. Number Two,
when I say the word
I hit "late" at the end
Have you ever hit anything
[ Laughter ]
[ Laughter and applause ]
Okay.
Number Three,
have you ever noticed
in the morning than at night?
-Cinnamon smells different?
Smells different? Smells?
[ Sniffing ]
[ Laughter ]
[ Barking ]
[ Laughter and applause ]
-[ Breathing sharply ]
[ Groans ]
[ Laughter and applause ]
Gary, would you like to
as to who these people are?
-I want to hear this one.
[ Laughter ]
-Wayne is an exceedingly
who thinks a lot of himself.
-No, no, you're supposed to
[ Laughter and applause ]
-It's true. It's true.
-And what things
-Oh, commercials.
[ Buzzer ]
-Colin Mochrie from Canada
is a man who continuously is
re-birthed over and over again
-Yes! Sure, why not. Absolutely.
Very close. Very close.
-And Ryan Stiles is an airport
-Yeah. There you go. Yeah.
[ Cheers and applause ]
I would give Colin some points,
but I think that
[ Laughter ]
-Still a little hungry.
[ Laughter ]
-The store is closed.
And now we come to a game called
This is a game for Colin, Ryan,
[ Cheers and applause ]
You guys are going
So, here, each of you
Our guys are gonna act out
Each item has a different
A different personality
So, here are your props.
So, whoever is holding the gun
Whoever has the binoculars
And whoever has the water bottle
[ Laughter ]
And the scene is that you're
Whenever you're ready.
-I don't see any game.
-Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah.
Ooh. Ah! Ooh! Ah! Ooh.
-Perhaps we should go back
-Mm, tracking, I am.
-Let me see if
-What do you see?
-I don't see nothing, baby.
-Violence with gun against,
Hold you, you will.
-What's wrong with your syntax?
-Thirsty, am I.
-I gotta -- I gotta --
I gotta hunt me some elk
-Star date 5-25.
I've beamed down to the...
We're tracking deer.
-Wait a minute. Elk.
-Kill it, I will.
-Oh. Thanks.
-Let me, uh -- Let me try
will you?
Here, why don't you...
-...take this water
-Ooh. Me shoot a rabbit, I did.
-♪ I think you should
♪ And tell me if it's dead ♪
♪ Because if it isn't dead ♪
♪ That would be amen ♪
[ Cheers and applause ]
-Ooh. I shall check.
[ Laughter ]
-Looking, I am.
Whoa, mama.
[ Laughter and applause ]
I've -- I've lost my companions.
Mm, gone, they are.
Mm, can see them ahead.
Mm, they are gone, am I.
Ooh. Lost my point,
[ Speaks indistinctly ]
[ Buzzer ]
[ Cheers and applause ]
-Hey, join me after the break
from the guys on "Whose Line?"
Stay tuned.
-Hey, there. Welcome back to
And now, we move onto a game
This is for all four of
In this game, Colin is
Gary, Ryan, and Wayne
Each one is an odd character.
Gary is the co-anchor who is
trying to make him
for his first day at school.
Wayne is the sportscaster
an entire "Taken" movie.
[ Laughter ]
And Ryan is
who's acting out the history
Whenever you're ready,
Take it away.
[ Newscast-style music plays ]
-Welcome to the 6:00 news.
I'm your anchor, Apollo Loco.
Our top story,
a fifth-grade teacher today
against the school,
because she was cross-eyed.
They said that's not true,
she just couldn't
[ Laughter and applause ]
Let's see what else is
-Coming up later in the world
Uh-oh. Oh, Lord have --
Mm. Mm. Mm. Mm. Mm.
Let them see your teeth
[ Laughter ]
-I'm 57, Mom.
[ Laughter ]
Let's see what's happening
-[ Imitates telephone ringing ]
Excuse me.
Hello?
I have your daughter.
-[ Crying ] Daddy! Daddy!
[ Sobbing ]
-Listen very carefully.
I happen to be a newscaster
I have a very specific
Click.
I'll be right back.
[ Clicking tongue,
[ Laughter and applause ]
Oh, no!
-[ Breathing shakily ]
[ Cheers and applause ]
-Shh, shh.
It's alright. It's alright.
And I am your daddy.
[ Laughter ]
-You've never killed for me.
-I haven't killed for you, baby,
but I almost died
-Let's see what --
your father's not
[ Laughter ]
-Let's see what's happening
-Well, let's just check
It looks like -- Oh,
[ Imitates explosion ]
[ Laughter ]
[ Roars ]
[ Screeches ]
[ Screams ]
Die, witch, die!
Oh, honey, you just tell Bobby
you don't want
Let's surf, Susie, let's surf!
[ Imitates music ]
'80s. Pfft.
Hey, welcome to "Keeping Up
[ Laughter ]
That's how it all ends.
-That's been the 6:00 news.
Goodnight and good news.
-Oh, button your shirt up, baby.
[ Buzzer ]
[ Cheers and applause ]
-I only did that because I don't
-It was just interesting
-I just did the important
Cowboys and Indians.
-Surfing.
-That's the title
-Next up is a game called
This is for all four
Come on down.
Ryan and Colin are there.
Now, before the show,
to write down a bunch of scenes
by our gentleman performers,
inside this hat right here.
I'm gonna read them out.
We'll see what our performers
And here's the first one.
Unlikely pet food commercials.
-He won't eat his food,
but he'll lick peanut butter
[ Laughter ]
Here he comes now.
Nope.
[ Laughter ]
-Life Cycle -- the pet food
-[ Sneezes ]
[ Laughter ]
-Has that --
-I think we need
[ Laughter ]
-I'm allergic to Life Cycle.
Things you can say
-Oh.
-...that you cannot say
[ Laughter ]
-This is warm but yeasty.
[ Laughter and applause ]
[ Buzzer ]
-Ooh, and when you're finished,
[ Laughter and applause ]
[ Buzzer ]
-I just love your muffin top.
[ Laughter ]
[ Buzzer ]
-Mm, there's too much yeast
-And Ryan never listens
-I don't listen.
-Proof that Ryan is never
-I do not listen to the show.
-Mm. Too hard.
[ Laughter ]
[ Buzzer ]
-Well, this will look good with
Bread.
-Mm. Do I want the big buns?
Yes. I will take your big buns
[ Buzzer ]
[ Laughter and applause ]
-I'm number 37.
[ Laughter and applause ]
[ Buzzer ]
-Hillbilly versions
-Alright.
Someone guess
[ Laughter and applause ]
-Don't go anywhere.
"Whose Line Is It Anyway?"
Stick around.
-Welcome back to
We're gonna keep things moving
with a game that is called
This is a game
with the help of Laura Hall
and Linda Taylor
Come on down, everybody.
Ryan and Colin are two
They are talking about
Wayne and Gary
of the songs on that album.
So what I need is a suggestion
What is a job
A job that you have
[ Shouting suggestions ]
I've got a good one.
is going to be
Whenever you guys are ready,
-Hi. We'll be back
"Hungry, Hungry Hippo Games."
You know some things go together
Abbott and Costello,
[ Laughter ]
And that's what I think
when you hear this
-What?
-Oh.
-Which features
-[ Gasps ] Mr. T?
-Oh, I pity the fool.
[ Laughter ]
-So sit back and listen to
"I Don't Think
[ Funk music playing ]
It's time to get funky
I said it's already funky
Yeah, it's all funky in the cab.
-♪ Hey ♪
♪ I said, you better
♪ You may smell
♪ But it ain't no pine tree ♪
♪ I don't think you heard me ♪
♪ Baby, you need to hear ♪
-♪ Come on, baby ♪
-♪ It ain't no pine tree ♪
♪ Hanging from the back
♪ Sing it, T ♪
-♪ I pity the fool ♪
-♪ Who don't clean out his car ♪
-♪ It ain't cool ♪
-♪ Huh, clean out your car ♪
-♪ I had a cartoon ♪
♪ I think Mr. T just had
♪ A little mini, mini, mini,
-♪ Yeah ♪
-♪ I don't know if you ever had
-♪ Not a grand mal ♪
♪ Maybe it's a sycamore ♪
♪ Get funky with it, T ♪
-♪ I'm smelling it,
♪ Mmm ♪
-♪ I'm smelling it,
♪ I pity the fool ♪
-♪ He pity the fool ♪
-♪ He said he pity the fool ♪
♪ When I had a cartoon ♪
[ Cheers and applause ]
-Wow! A simpler time
[ Laughter ]
You know, Colin, as a small boy
growing up in the wheat fields
the family would often gather
and get together
-Yes.
when I think calypso,
cab calypso song
-Oh, I know the one.
-You know the one I'm thinking,
"Wait, My coat's Caught
Hey! Wait!
-♪ Wait, wait, wait, wait ♪
♪ Hey, oh ♪
♪ Me get into the car,
♪ And I said hey, Mr. Cab
-♪ No, No, and then he said
♪ And when he did, I did ♪
-♪ Say what? ♪
♪ Is a story that I'll have
-♪ I say, hey, hey, hey, hey,
♪ Wait, my coat is caught ♪
-♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh,
♪ Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey,
♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, hey ♪
-♪ He said I can't understand
♪ Don't you know Mr. Owl? ♪
♪ He said, I tried
♪ But my name ain't got
♪ I said you don't need
♪ Just pull the cab over ♪
-♪ He said I'll never, ever,
♪ While I'm driving
♪ And he said, like, hey ♪
♪ Oh, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey ♪
♪ My coat is caught
-♪ And then I said hey, hey,
-♪ The coat is caught
-♪ And my coat was hey,
-♪ Hey, hey, now ♪
-♪ It's in the door now ♪
♪ Hey, hey, hey,
♪ His coat is caught
♪ This street ♪
[ Cheers and applause ]
-Hey, want to find out
Stick around. I'll tell you
Stay tuned.
-Hey, there! Welcome back to
That's our show.
Tonight's winners are all four
So I would like you
as if you are talking parrots
Enjoy.
Thanks for watching, everybody.
-[ Squawks ] Dan Patterson.
[ Squawks ] Dan Patterson.
-[ Squawks ]
-[ Squawks ] Ryan.
-[ Squawks ] I'd love a cracker.
-Wayne want a cracker.
-You should have grabbed
-I know.
-[ Squawks ]
-Aisha Tyler wants a cracker.
-[ Squawks ] Aisha Tyler.
-You got a key?
-[ Squawks ]
-What the --
-[ Squawks ]
Oh, we're mimes.
-He's in a cage.
You're not engaging.
[ Cheers and applause ]