1
00:00:42,250 --> 00:00:43,710
-Cheers.
-Yeah.

2
00:00:57,098 --> 00:00:58,141
-So beautiful.
-Yeah.

3
00:01:07,859 --> 00:01:08,693
Love...

4
00:01:09,819 --> 00:01:10,653
family...

5
00:01:11,821 --> 00:01:12,655
joy.

6
00:01:14,699 --> 00:01:15,700
If you're here...

7
00:01:16,743 --> 00:01:19,579
it's because you love Marvin and Liza very much.

8
00:01:20,038 --> 00:01:21,122
At least one of them.

9
00:01:23,124 --> 00:01:25,752
And you wanna share in their happiness.

10
00:01:25,835 --> 00:01:27,086
I know I do.

11
00:01:28,254 --> 00:01:29,339
Liza...

12
00:01:30,673 --> 00:01:33,802
Charlie, Cooper, I wanna thank you
for trusting me with this ceremony.

13
00:01:33,885 --> 00:01:36,971
I consider it a very high honor and a privilege.

14
00:01:37,055 --> 00:01:41,851
And I know your dear departed parents,
Jerry and Barb, would have approved,

15
00:01:41,935 --> 00:01:44,896
and just as important, tipped me handsomely.

16
00:01:49,150 --> 00:01:52,320
-You all right, buddy? Think unhappy thoughts.
-Yeah. Okay.

17
00:01:52,403 --> 00:01:56,616
Childhood obesity, dolphins caught in tuna nets.

18
00:01:56,699 --> 00:01:58,910
-Syria.
-Hang in there, all right?

19
00:01:58,993 --> 00:02:04,415
-Remember, 50 percent of marriages end in divorce.
-My God, that's depressing.

20
00:02:04,499 --> 00:02:05,333
Thank you.

21
00:02:07,669 --> 00:02:09,128
What the hell?

22
00:02:09,212 --> 00:02:10,922
That's their brother Charlie.

23
00:02:11,005 --> 00:02:14,384
Apparently, he's got some disease
where he passes out when he's happy.

24
00:02:14,467 --> 00:02:17,428
-That's a thing?
-Or else he's just an asshole.

25
00:02:18,555 --> 00:02:23,184
I first met Liza when she was smaller
than a butternut squash.

26
00:02:24,853 --> 00:02:28,273
Charlie and Cooper paraded
their new baby sister into mass,

27
00:02:28,356 --> 00:02:31,067
like she was the Second Coming herself.

28
00:02:31,151 --> 00:02:35,238
I swear, they were prouder,
even than your mom and your dad.

29
00:02:35,321 --> 00:02:38,324
-Oh, Jesus. Hey, come on, man! Come on!
-Is he okay?

30
00:02:38,408 --> 00:02:40,869
Brian Wilson, vegan meat.

31
00:02:40,952 --> 00:02:42,662
-Cosby. Cosby.
-Cosby.

32
00:02:43,580 --> 00:02:47,250
-Let's go ahead, and drive it to the hoop, okay? We're ready.
-No, I understand. Okay.

33
00:02:47,333 --> 00:02:49,460
-Marvin, do you take Liza to be your wife?
-Faster.

34
00:02:49,544 --> 00:02:53,590
To have and to hold, for better, for worse,
sickness, health, to cherish till death do you part?

35
00:02:53,673 --> 00:02:56,926
-I do.
-And, Liza, do you do all that stuff too?

36
00:03:01,014 --> 00:03:01,890
I do.

37
00:03:04,851 --> 00:03:10,315
Then by the power vested in me
by the State of New York...

38
00:03:11,316 --> 00:03:13,359
and God, I pronounce you husband and wife.

39
00:03:13,443 --> 00:03:15,153
-No, no, no!
-Hey! Careful!

40
00:03:18,698 --> 00:03:21,493
-Is he okay?
-It's okay! It's all right. I got him.

41
00:03:21,951 --> 00:03:23,995
This happens.

42
00:03:24,078 --> 00:03:24,913
Charlie?

43
00:03:31,294 --> 00:03:32,879
Hey.

44
00:03:32,962 --> 00:03:33,963
It lives!

45
00:03:36,174 --> 00:03:39,010
-What'd I miss?
-They're on their way to Belize.

46
00:03:39,719 --> 00:03:40,553
Sorry.

47
00:03:41,638 --> 00:03:43,097
Check this out.

48
00:03:43,181 --> 00:03:44,891
Before they left...

49
00:03:44,974 --> 00:03:48,853
Marvin presents Liza with this big box, right? A gift.

50
00:03:48,937 --> 00:03:50,980
Makes a big deal out of it.

51
00:03:51,064 --> 00:03:55,193
Not jewelry, not a day at the spa, lingerie.

52
00:03:55,276 --> 00:03:58,154
It's travel pants with the zip-off legs.

53
00:03:58,238 --> 00:04:01,199
I saw the arm come back.
I thought she was gonna punch him.

54
00:04:01,282 --> 00:04:03,368
-Stop it.
-Seriously.

55
00:04:05,245 --> 00:04:07,747
-No more, man.
-But she's all right.

56
00:04:07,831 --> 00:04:10,333
Uncle Jeff stitched up her lip, and...

57
00:04:10,416 --> 00:04:13,962
Yeah, you tore shit up, man.
That whole front row's gonna have PTSD.

58
00:04:14,045 --> 00:04:17,757
She just looked so beautiful.
I couldn't stop the happiness.

59
00:04:17,841 --> 00:04:21,177
Yeah. You won't even consider trying
that Xyrem stuff again?

60
00:04:21,261 --> 00:04:25,765
It doesn't do any more for me than exercise, Cooper,
and exercise doesn't make me wet the bed.

61
00:04:26,474 --> 00:04:28,810
All right. I just, you know...

62
00:04:30,311 --> 00:04:31,437
I don't want you to die.

63
00:04:33,648 --> 00:04:35,275
I'll be fine...

64
00:04:35,358 --> 00:04:37,986
as long as there are no more weddings ever.

65
00:04:39,028 --> 00:04:42,240
-I can count on you for that, right?
-Hey.

66
00:04:42,323 --> 00:04:45,368
Oh, I saw Marvin's sister Rita checking you out.

67
00:04:45,451 --> 00:04:46,953
-Was she, now?
-Yeah.

68
00:04:47,036 --> 00:04:49,122
Must have a thing for fainters.

69
00:04:49,205 --> 00:04:51,457
Don't be so dismissive. Some chicks love a project.

70
00:04:51,541 --> 00:04:55,128
I don't wear socks with sandals, Cooper.
I have an incurable neurologic condition.

71
00:04:55,211 --> 00:04:57,463
But don't be all poopy about it.

72
00:06:04,864 --> 00:06:06,032
Okay, come on.

73
00:06:10,078 --> 00:06:13,331
-Miss, let me help. I'll help you.
-Thank you so much.

74
00:06:14,624 --> 00:06:15,458
No problem.

75
00:06:38,106 --> 00:06:40,942
Your baby sister married off.

76
00:06:41,025 --> 00:06:44,320
-That's gotta make you feel old.
-Liza always did everything first.

77
00:06:44,404 --> 00:06:47,407
When she was 12 years old,
she pressured me into smoking a joint.

78
00:06:47,490 --> 00:06:50,201
Come on, man. Don't you want to fall in love?

79
00:06:50,285 --> 00:06:52,662
Oh, I wanna be in love, sure.

80
00:06:52,745 --> 00:06:57,417
Ideally, I'd like to skip past the honeymoon phase
to the steady sharing-deodorant phase.

81
00:06:57,500 --> 00:06:59,335
Oh, you're killing me, man.

82
00:06:59,419 --> 00:07:00,837
I'm with you, Charlie.

83
00:07:00,920 --> 00:07:03,756
It's important to find someone
that you can kind of forget is there,

84
00:07:03,840 --> 00:07:06,301
so that when they leave, it's like losing a cat.

85
00:07:06,384 --> 00:07:08,344
No, that's not exactly what I--

86
00:07:08,428 --> 00:07:09,888
You know, I need to be careful.

87
00:07:09,971 --> 00:07:13,558
I need someone I can picture in sweatpants,
just the right amount of mousy.

88
00:07:13,641 --> 00:07:16,352
Do you listen to the <i>Modern Love</i> podcast?

89
00:07:16,978 --> 00:07:19,355
-I don't. You do?
-Religiously.

90
00:07:19,439 --> 00:07:23,526
There was a story the other day about a couple,
where he was deaf and she was blind,

91
00:07:23,610 --> 00:07:29,157
so they couldn't speak or use sign language,
but they were happily married for, like, 15 years.

92
00:07:29,240 --> 00:07:30,158
What happened then?

93
00:07:31,576 --> 00:07:33,953
She was killed by a self-driving car.

94
00:07:34,037 --> 00:07:37,207
-Yeah. It was a lot.
-Thanks for your input, Victor.

95
00:07:37,290 --> 00:07:40,043
Everyone stop talking right now. I need to concentrate.

96
00:07:40,126 --> 00:07:43,713
-You don't have to react that way to stuff...
-I don't know what you're talking about.

97
00:07:43,796 --> 00:07:47,258
I took you to the baseball game.
You were like a crazy person at the baseball game.

98
00:07:47,342 --> 00:07:51,262
"A crazy person at a--"? It's a baseball game.
Is there etiquette for a baseball game?

99
00:07:51,346 --> 00:07:53,723
-It's a Little League game with kids, right?
-Okay, fine.

100
00:07:53,807 --> 00:07:56,059
How about you getting drunk at a Little League game?

101
00:07:56,142 --> 00:07:57,936
What else are you gonna do at a Little League game?

102
00:07:58,353 --> 00:08:00,396
Sit down for a second.

103
00:08:12,242 --> 00:08:14,661
I ask you to-- I ask you to relax.

104
00:08:14,744 --> 00:08:16,704
I say, "Relax," and you take it--

105
00:08:16,788 --> 00:08:20,083
It is the most annoying thing on the planet to hear.

106
00:08:20,166 --> 00:08:23,294
-I'm just saying "relax," like it's not that big--
-Stop saying that.

107
00:08:23,378 --> 00:08:24,671
Will you just relax?

108
00:08:25,421 --> 00:08:27,215
What are they talking about?

109
00:08:27,715 --> 00:08:31,177
You know I've been doing a lot of work on myself lately.

110
00:08:31,261 --> 00:08:33,471
Like, I've really been trying to become a better person.

111
00:08:34,013 --> 00:08:35,473
Are you breaking up with me?

112
00:08:36,975 --> 00:08:38,852
-Yes.
-Seriously?

113
00:08:40,979 --> 00:08:43,022
We're in a library.

114
00:08:44,983 --> 00:08:49,445
Is that why you brought me here,
so I wouldn't raise my voice?

115
00:08:49,529 --> 00:08:50,864
No.

116
00:08:50,947 --> 00:08:53,908
Listen, we both know that you're passionate.

117
00:08:53,992 --> 00:08:56,286
Oh, is that a euphemism for "loud"?

118
00:08:56,369 --> 00:08:58,663
-She's getting heated.
-Euphemism's a great word.

119
00:08:58,746 --> 00:09:01,875
Here's another one. You're fricking bananas.

120
00:09:01,958 --> 00:09:03,960
-Mother--
-All right, come on.

121
00:09:04,043 --> 00:09:05,003
Great.

122
00:09:05,086 --> 00:09:07,839
Are you serious right now? Take that!

123
00:09:07,922 --> 00:09:09,883
-Oh, okay! Ma'am, would you mind?
-Hey, miss?

124
00:09:09,966 --> 00:09:12,510
-Will you please get down?
-I like it up here.

125
00:09:12,594 --> 00:09:15,972
Yeah, she's crazy, man.
Not just like part of the month, like, the whole thing.

126
00:09:16,055 --> 00:09:17,515
Oh, my God!

127
00:09:17,599 --> 00:09:21,478
This penny-loafer-wearing asshole brought me in here
to break up with me.

128
00:09:21,561 --> 00:09:24,063
Yeah, because I thought she'd keep a lid on it for once.

129
00:09:24,147 --> 00:09:28,943
-Excuse me, excuse me. Why don't you just let it out?
-What?

130
00:09:29,027 --> 00:09:31,613
You're standing on a table.
You clearly have something to say.

131
00:09:31,696 --> 00:09:32,572
I think you should say it.

132
00:09:34,407 --> 00:09:37,994
Okay. Well, for example, "keep a lid on it."

133
00:09:38,077 --> 00:09:42,790
-I don't have to keep a lid on anything.
-I'm pretty sure every nerd in this library disagrees.

134
00:09:42,874 --> 00:09:45,877
You know what's crazy is,
I don't even know how we ended up together.

135
00:09:45,960 --> 00:09:49,672
He is rude to waiters. He screens calls from his mom.

136
00:09:50,089 --> 00:09:53,051
-He threads his eyebrows.
-I'm part Greek.

137
00:09:53,134 --> 00:09:55,470
-And your friends don't like him?
-Oh, they hate him.

138
00:09:55,553 --> 00:09:58,890
They can't understand what I see in him, you know?
And then after a while...

139
00:09:59,891 --> 00:10:01,726
it becomes the reason why I'm with him.

140
00:10:01,810 --> 00:10:04,354
Sure. It's bad choices. That's your thing, right?

141
00:10:05,772 --> 00:10:07,774
Yeah. So it's her fault.

142
00:10:07,857 --> 00:10:10,109
-Hey, hey!
-Hey, miss, please, give Lavelle the book.

143
00:10:10,193 --> 00:10:14,239
-You stand back, or I'm gonna tear this apart.
-She's all talk.

144
00:10:14,322 --> 00:10:15,156
Ma'am?

145
00:10:15,865 --> 00:10:16,950
Ma'am?

146
00:10:18,284 --> 00:10:19,452
Ma'am!

147
00:10:19,536 --> 00:10:22,080
You will never, ever tear the binding on that book.

148
00:10:22,163 --> 00:10:23,623
It's reinforced for libraries.

149
00:10:25,166 --> 00:10:27,710
-You can, however, try the pages.
-Charlie.

150
00:10:27,794 --> 00:10:31,005
No, please. Start in the middle. Knock yourself out.

151
00:10:31,089 --> 00:10:32,841
-Yeah!
-There we go. See how good that feels?

152
00:10:34,133 --> 00:10:36,136
-Does that feel good?
-Huh, am I being loud now?

153
00:10:36,219 --> 00:10:39,180
-Just relax.
-Oh, relax?

154
00:10:39,264 --> 00:10:40,598
Relax?

155
00:10:40,682 --> 00:10:43,893
Relax!

156
00:10:48,606 --> 00:10:49,816
Tell me something.

157
00:10:50,942 --> 00:10:54,070
Did you ever really think that this would last?

158
00:10:54,154 --> 00:10:56,656
Or the better question is,

159
00:10:56,739 --> 00:10:58,867
did you ever really want it to?

160
00:11:07,959 --> 00:11:09,294
Fine, we can break up.

161
00:11:12,130 --> 00:11:14,215
Well, that went as expected.

162
00:11:16,092 --> 00:11:18,011
-Thanks.
-How'd he do that?

163
00:11:18,094 --> 00:11:22,348
Like a blind man learns to listen,
except Charlie's got an ear for pain.

164
00:11:24,809 --> 00:11:26,978
-What's it to you?
-What?

165
00:11:27,061 --> 00:11:30,023
I'm just-- I'm trying to keep things calm here.

166
00:11:31,107 --> 00:11:32,901
-You're good at it.
-I need to be.

167
00:11:34,819 --> 00:11:37,280
-Sorry!
-Yeah, don't do that anymore.

168
00:11:41,284 --> 00:11:42,911
I'm taking off early.

169
00:11:42,994 --> 00:11:46,080
"Measles outbreak on the rise. CDC concerned."

170
00:11:46,164 --> 00:11:47,123
Thank you.

171
00:11:53,630 --> 00:11:55,381
Good one!

172
00:11:55,465 --> 00:11:57,300
Kelly! That's it!

173
00:11:57,383 --> 00:12:00,136
One, two, three, four, five,

174
00:12:00,220 --> 00:12:03,598
six, seven, eight, nine, 10!

175
00:12:03,681 --> 00:12:06,184
Zika virus, Congress.

176
00:12:07,101 --> 00:12:08,520
Oh, God.

177
00:12:08,603 --> 00:12:10,396
Famine in Darfur.

178
00:12:10,480 --> 00:12:11,898
White guy, dreadlocks.

179
00:12:13,691 --> 00:12:14,818
-Hey, Charlie.
-Hey.

180
00:12:14,901 --> 00:12:18,154
-You just made it.
-Barely. Thanks.

181
00:12:24,744 --> 00:12:26,788
-You good?
-Yeah.

182
00:13:02,699 --> 00:13:05,660
There's someone here to see you.
She brought you something.

183
00:13:05,743 --> 00:13:06,703
"She"?

184
00:13:08,872 --> 00:13:11,875
-Oh, God. Tell her I died.
-I already told her you were here.

185
00:13:11,958 --> 00:13:13,877
-It was very sudden.
-Hello?

186
00:13:13,960 --> 00:13:16,921
-Hi there, Mr. Librarian.
-Hey. Come to throw more books around?

187
00:13:18,673 --> 00:13:22,385
I'm here to thank you for coming
to my defense the other day.

188
00:13:22,469 --> 00:13:25,930
Oh, I didn't come to your defense.
I just came to get you off the table.

189
00:13:26,014 --> 00:13:27,891
Well, still, I appreciate it.

190
00:13:27,974 --> 00:13:31,519
-I got you this, a replacement.
-Didn't have to do that.

191
00:13:32,520 --> 00:13:36,024
-It's the least I could do.
-No, the copy you destroyed was a first edition.

192
00:13:36,107 --> 00:13:39,527
Oh, I'm sorry.
You did kind of egg me on, though.

193
00:13:42,780 --> 00:13:43,615
All right.

194
00:13:45,408 --> 00:13:48,453
-I was thinking about something you said that day.
-Right.

195
00:13:48,536 --> 00:13:51,080
Did I really want it to last?
And I realized that I didn't.

196
00:13:51,164 --> 00:13:52,582
It's a good thing it ended, then.

197
00:13:52,665 --> 00:13:55,335
But why did I get into a relationship
I knew was doomed to fail?

198
00:13:55,418 --> 00:13:58,463
-Ask the guy who doomed it.
-It's not his fault.

199
00:13:58,546 --> 00:14:01,382
Actually, it is all his fault.

200
00:14:01,466 --> 00:14:05,220
But I knew where it was headed
when he canceled on a date to go to a boat show.

201
00:14:05,303 --> 00:14:08,681
-By the way, he's the second guy to do that to me.
-Maybe you should move inland?

202
00:14:10,099 --> 00:14:13,603
There's something I find irresistible
about men I have no future with.

203
00:14:21,236 --> 00:14:22,487
Right.

204
00:14:22,570 --> 00:14:25,448
It's so quiet in here.
Does it make you just wanna scream?

205
00:14:25,532 --> 00:14:27,617
Don't scream, please.

206
00:14:27,700 --> 00:14:31,871
-Come on, have you tried screaming? It's fun.
-I know it's fun, but there's more to life than fun.

207
00:14:31,955 --> 00:14:34,374
-Is there?
-I'm not sure anymore.

208
00:14:40,171 --> 00:14:42,757
Well, thanks again.

209
00:14:42,841 --> 00:14:45,218
-I'm Francesca, by the way.
-I'm Charlie.

210
00:14:51,516 --> 00:14:54,519
Well, it was nice to meet you too, Charlie.

211
00:14:54,602 --> 00:14:56,980
-Yeah!
-I'll leave this. Okay.

212
00:14:57,063 --> 00:14:58,148
Yeah.

213
00:15:00,108 --> 00:15:02,986
We need to settle something right now.

214
00:15:03,069 --> 00:15:04,237
Are you gay?

215
00:15:04,320 --> 00:15:07,240
I mean, it's cool if you are, but I gotta know

216
00:15:07,323 --> 00:15:12,245
-because I want off this emotional roller coaster.
-I'm not gay, Lavelle.

217
00:15:12,328 --> 00:15:13,997
Eunuch? Are you a eunuch?

218
00:15:14,080 --> 00:15:15,331
-What?
-It is unfair.

219
00:15:15,415 --> 00:15:19,335
You won't go out with her because of how she looks.
It's not her fault that she's smoking hot.

220
00:15:19,419 --> 00:15:23,506
No, it's not just her looks. It's her manner.
It's her laugh. It's her stupid gift-wrapped books.

221
00:15:23,590 --> 00:15:25,049
She's just too...

222
00:15:26,134 --> 00:15:27,969
too.

223
00:15:28,052 --> 00:15:30,972
-It sounds like you kind of dig her.
-That's the problem.

224
00:15:31,055 --> 00:15:32,891
Let's get down to brass tacks, Charlie.

225
00:15:32,974 --> 00:15:36,060
Sperm quality declines sharply after age 35.

226
00:15:36,144 --> 00:15:37,896
Thank you, Victor.

227
00:15:37,979 --> 00:15:42,484
You gotta stick your neck out sometime.
Or life will pass you right by.

228
00:15:42,567 --> 00:15:43,401
Yeah, right.

229
00:15:48,781 --> 00:15:49,616
Okay!

230
00:15:52,410 --> 00:15:56,956
-"Okay," what?
-Okay, I'll go out with you.

231
00:15:58,625 --> 00:15:59,876
Oh, I--

232
00:15:59,959 --> 00:16:02,128
I didn't exactly ask.

233
00:16:02,212 --> 00:16:04,589
How does 2:00, Saturday, sound?

234
00:16:04,672 --> 00:16:07,217
-Will your mom be driving?
-My parents are dead.

235
00:16:11,596 --> 00:16:14,307
Okay, then. Saturday at 2.

236
00:16:14,390 --> 00:16:15,600
I'll wear sunscreen.

237
00:16:15,683 --> 00:16:17,852
Great. I mean, good.

238
00:16:17,936 --> 00:16:19,229
See you then.

239
00:16:19,312 --> 00:16:21,189
Oh, wait. Charlie, don't you need my number?

240
00:16:21,272 --> 00:16:24,734
Call the front desk later. I need to go right now.

241
00:16:29,989 --> 00:16:32,492
I don't know. I guess I just don't get it.

242
00:16:32,575 --> 00:16:35,119
You haven't gone on a date in years, right?

243
00:16:35,203 --> 00:16:38,206
-So why her? Why now?
-I don't know.

244
00:16:39,415 --> 00:16:43,086
She was so angry, beside herself,
completely out of control.

245
00:16:43,169 --> 00:16:45,964
-It was thrilling.
-I don't get that at all.

246
00:16:46,047 --> 00:16:48,716
It's like she's everything I've ever avoided.

247
00:16:48,800 --> 00:16:51,761
-I'm drawn to her like a moth.
-To a flame.

248
00:16:53,972 --> 00:16:57,475
-The end of that phrase is "to a burning, deadly flame."
-Yeah, I get it.

249
00:16:58,685 --> 00:17:01,646
What is there to decide? All your shirts look the same.

250
00:17:02,856 --> 00:17:06,234
-Why do all your shirts look the same?
-No compliments.

251
00:17:08,486 --> 00:17:09,571
Does she know?

252
00:17:09,654 --> 00:17:11,823
-Does Francesca--?
-Are you kidding?

253
00:17:11,906 --> 00:17:14,742
Hi, I'm Charlie. I'm medically forbidden to have fun.
You wanna go out?

254
00:17:15,660 --> 00:17:17,287
Pass the tacks.

255
00:17:17,370 --> 00:17:18,746
No.

256
00:17:18,830 --> 00:17:21,624
-Come on, Charlie, it's too gruesome.
-It works.

257
00:17:23,918 --> 00:17:25,378
Fine.

258
00:17:25,461 --> 00:17:29,257
Listen, you put as many office supplies
in the bottom of your shoe as you want.

259
00:17:29,340 --> 00:17:32,010
Eventually, she's gonna find out.

260
00:17:32,093 --> 00:17:33,428
Dates are supposed to be fun.

261
00:17:35,805 --> 00:17:37,432
Not this one.

262
00:17:39,601 --> 00:17:42,729
The only good thing to come
of my grandmother's Alzheimer's

263
00:17:42,812 --> 00:17:46,649
was that it helped her forget her miserable life.

264
00:17:47,817 --> 00:17:50,862
She was raised in a Hooverville...

265
00:17:51,905 --> 00:17:54,532
on the wrong side of the wrong side of the tracks.

266
00:17:54,616 --> 00:17:57,994
The kind of place where dreams go to die, and hope...

267
00:17:58,453 --> 00:18:02,582
Hope is smothered in its crib.

268
00:18:03,416 --> 00:18:04,834
-Is he a friend of yours?
-No.

269
00:18:04,918 --> 00:18:07,670
See Mildred Munch didn't have hope.

270
00:18:07,754 --> 00:18:09,881
She didn't have dreams...

271
00:18:11,633 --> 00:18:13,802
so she didn't have nothing to lose.

272
00:18:18,181 --> 00:18:20,934
Norman, you son of a bitch, you get a job!

273
00:18:21,017 --> 00:18:24,479
You get a job, or you're gonna get a new wife!

274
00:18:24,562 --> 00:18:27,732
Those are empty threats,
just like you're an empty person...

275
00:18:27,816 --> 00:18:29,400
Were there good reviews?

276
00:18:30,360 --> 00:18:31,277
I didn't check.

277
00:18:34,531 --> 00:18:35,865
No, please! I--

278
00:18:36,282 --> 00:18:37,492
Why not?

279
00:18:37,575 --> 00:18:41,162
And that, dear friends, is when Mildred Munch,

280
00:18:41,246 --> 00:18:45,583
my bubbie Millie turned...

281
00:18:45,667 --> 00:18:46,668
to prostitution.

282
00:18:51,005 --> 00:18:51,840
Hand jobs!

283
00:18:52,632 --> 00:18:56,219
-Seriously, why are we here?
-Hand jobs! First one's free!

284
00:18:56,302 --> 00:18:57,804
Why are we here?

285
00:18:58,763 --> 00:19:02,350
I'm sorry.
Is my play interrupting your conversation?

286
00:19:03,434 --> 00:19:06,479
-No.
-I didn't buy a ticket to your conversation.

287
00:19:06,563 --> 00:19:09,274
-So sorry. We're done.
-Yeah. Yeah, we're--

288
00:19:09,357 --> 00:19:10,859
-Please continue.
-Sorry.

289
00:19:10,942 --> 00:19:15,155
Thank you for permission to continue my play.
I very much appreciate it.

290
00:19:15,238 --> 00:19:18,783
-I'll just hop back into the moment.
-We should go. Sorry.

291
00:19:18,867 --> 00:19:22,078
-I'll just pretend that I'm not completely distracted now.
-I'm sorry.

292
00:19:22,162 --> 00:19:26,666
How about I skip to the part
where her firstborn dies of common diarrhea?

293
00:19:26,749 --> 00:19:28,293
I said, diarrhea!

294
00:19:30,670 --> 00:19:31,629
I said...

295
00:19:33,006 --> 00:19:34,007
diarrhea.

296
00:19:36,176 --> 00:19:39,679
-Diarrhea!
-All right. Yeah. I know.

297
00:19:39,762 --> 00:19:42,223
I know, but to be fair to him...

298
00:19:42,307 --> 00:19:43,600
we did kind of--

299
00:19:43,683 --> 00:19:46,311
-Diarrhea?
-Yeah, diarrhea.

300
00:19:46,394 --> 00:19:48,646
Come on, I kind of feel for him.

301
00:19:50,023 --> 00:19:52,734
-Where are we?
-It's...

302
00:19:52,817 --> 00:19:54,652
Are we--? Are we in danger?

303
00:19:55,361 --> 00:19:59,157
-It's starting to feel that way, yeah.
-Hold on to me so you don't get kidnapped.

304
00:20:04,704 --> 00:20:08,166
-So tell me about your sick aunt.
-Wow, you flirt weird.

305
00:20:10,543 --> 00:20:12,003
Sorry.

306
00:20:12,086 --> 00:20:14,589
It seemed important. It's something you're going through.

307
00:20:14,672 --> 00:20:16,925
Yeah, sometimes it's nice not to be going through it.

308
00:20:17,008 --> 00:20:21,346
Yeah, of course it is, but I'm an idiot, so just ignore me.
You'll have way more fun.

309
00:20:21,429 --> 00:20:22,388
It's all right.

310
00:20:22,472 --> 00:20:23,765
Since we're on the subject...

311
00:20:25,642 --> 00:20:26,559
it is hard.

312
00:20:27,602 --> 00:20:31,940
She's like my second mother,
after my real mother died of the same thing.

313
00:20:32,023 --> 00:20:35,485
Breast cancer runs in my family like hammertoes...

314
00:20:35,568 --> 00:20:37,487
so I've got that to look forward to.

315
00:20:38,655 --> 00:20:40,865
Look who's being fun now.

316
00:20:40,949 --> 00:20:43,535
I'm sorry, Francesca. That's awful.

317
00:20:44,911 --> 00:20:45,745
Thank you.

318
00:20:48,122 --> 00:20:48,957
It's not all bad.

319
00:20:49,040 --> 00:20:52,585
I've gotten really close with Sylvia
since I've been living with her,

320
00:20:52,669 --> 00:20:56,548
which I guess means it's gonna hurt
that much more when she...

321
00:20:58,967 --> 00:21:01,177
Well, that'll burn New York for me.

322
00:21:01,261 --> 00:21:02,804
Are you gonna leave?

323
00:21:02,887 --> 00:21:05,598
Oh, yeah. But I always do.

324
00:21:08,726 --> 00:21:11,980
I lost somebody close to me when I was young.

325
00:21:12,063 --> 00:21:14,732
My grandpa, Jacob.
He was like my best friend growing up.

326
00:21:15,692 --> 00:21:17,902
We had the same-- We had a lot in common.

327
00:21:19,529 --> 00:21:24,159
Every Sunday, he'd take me out to the carousel,
let me go round and round as many times as I wanted...

328
00:21:24,868 --> 00:21:26,995
even after he had to stop, you know?

329
00:21:28,371 --> 00:21:30,707
I think that's the happiest that I've ever been.

330
00:21:33,459 --> 00:21:34,544
Are you happy now?

331
00:21:38,131 --> 00:21:41,926
Not as happy as Mildred Munch. Diarrhea.

332
00:21:43,553 --> 00:21:44,554
Common diarrhea.

333
00:21:44,637 --> 00:21:47,599
-Common? Not even special diarrhea.
-Nope, common.

334
00:21:47,974 --> 00:21:51,478
-You didn't have one.
-Exactly. "On the wrong side of the wrong side of the tracks."

335
00:21:51,561 --> 00:21:54,522
"The wrong side of the wrong side of the tracks."
Like Troy McClure.

336
00:21:54,606 --> 00:21:57,567
-Can't believe you took me to that play.
-Nor can I.

337
00:21:57,650 --> 00:21:58,526
This is me.

338
00:21:59,486 --> 00:22:02,572
So my aunt should still be at karate,
if you wanna come up for a drink.

339
00:22:03,531 --> 00:22:06,534
-A drink? It's 3:30.
-Yes, it is.

340
00:22:08,036 --> 00:22:10,038
It's not about the drink, Charlie.

341
00:22:17,921 --> 00:22:18,963
Sure, why not?

342
00:22:19,464 --> 00:22:20,590
-Yeah?
-Yeah.

343
00:22:21,174 --> 00:22:23,593
I see now why you insisted on a matinee.

344
00:22:23,676 --> 00:22:25,762
We have more energy for messing around.

345
00:22:32,060 --> 00:22:33,978
Charlie! Oh, my God, Charlie!

346
00:22:35,104 --> 00:22:36,564
Charlie!

347
00:22:38,733 --> 00:22:40,735
<i>BP is 160 over...</i>

348
00:22:40,819 --> 00:22:42,737
<i>-Dr. Ramirez to Radiology.
-Pulse, 83.</i>

349
00:22:44,155 --> 00:22:47,784
<i>-Page Neuro, stat. Let's get him in Trauma, stat.
-Charlie...</i>

350
00:22:53,414 --> 00:22:54,582
Oh, come on.

351
00:22:56,501 --> 00:22:57,752
Excuse me. Excuse me.

352
00:22:57,836 --> 00:23:02,465
-Hi. I'm looking for Charles Greene.
-Are you here for Charlie?

353
00:23:02,549 --> 00:23:05,510
-I'm Francesca.
-Oh, Jesus. No wonder.

354
00:23:06,886 --> 00:23:07,929
Sorry.

355
00:23:08,012 --> 00:23:09,973
Hi. Cooper, brother.

356
00:23:12,350 --> 00:23:15,436
-So how'd it go?
-What do you mean? We ended up here.

357
00:23:15,937 --> 00:23:17,564
Right. Have you heard anything?

358
00:23:18,064 --> 00:23:22,610
-Just that he didn't break his neck, which is good.
-I guess you two really hit it off, huh?

359
00:23:23,653 --> 00:23:26,447
Well, yeah. I mean, I think-- I thought so. I--

360
00:23:27,323 --> 00:23:31,536
I don't know. I mean, we were headed upstairs,
and he just dropped.

361
00:23:31,619 --> 00:23:34,873
He, like-- I think he fainted from the heat or something?

362
00:23:34,956 --> 00:23:37,208
Yeah. From the heat. Yeah, probably.

363
00:23:37,292 --> 00:23:41,296
-That's super common because you gotta hydrate.
-Well, good news.

364
00:23:41,379 --> 00:23:44,632
Charlie's got a pretty nasty cut,
and his head's gonna ache for a while,

365
00:23:44,716 --> 00:23:48,052
but there's no fractures,
so all in all, we feel he got off lucky this time.

366
00:23:48,136 --> 00:23:50,138
-This time?
-Yeah.

367
00:23:50,221 --> 00:23:52,974
-The report says--
-You know, Charlie's got a thing.

368
00:23:53,600 --> 00:23:58,605
And it's a condition, according to some,
but to others, it's an adorable quirk.

369
00:23:58,688 --> 00:24:02,525
It's a disease caused by the shortage
of hypocretin in his brain.

370
00:24:02,609 --> 00:24:05,487
It's a chemical signal that makes most of us stay awake.

371
00:24:05,570 --> 00:24:09,532
Essentially, Charlie's body gets tricked
to think that it's asleep.

372
00:24:11,743 --> 00:24:12,952
Adorable quirk.

373
00:24:14,162 --> 00:24:15,079
Disease.

374
00:24:21,628 --> 00:24:22,504
Hey.

375
00:24:24,297 --> 00:24:25,173
Oh, hi.

376
00:24:29,302 --> 00:24:31,596
So that was crazy.

377
00:24:32,430 --> 00:24:36,643
-I guess I must have fainted. I need to hydrate.
-Charlie, I know.

378
00:24:44,567 --> 00:24:45,610
What's it called?

379
00:24:48,863 --> 00:24:49,781
Cataplexy.

380
00:24:51,282 --> 00:24:53,618
Technically, narcolepsy with cataplexy.

381
00:24:55,370 --> 00:24:56,496
Runs in the family.

382
00:24:58,540 --> 00:25:00,834
-Your Grandpa Jacob?
-Yeah.

383
00:25:01,918 --> 00:25:02,752
Yeah.

384
00:25:03,962 --> 00:25:06,965
Growing up, I thought he slept all the time
because he was old.

385
00:25:08,007 --> 00:25:09,926
Then it started happening to me.

386
00:25:10,844 --> 00:25:14,681
Pretty much any strong emotion will trigger it.

387
00:25:15,765 --> 00:25:17,517
In my case, it's...

388
00:25:19,644 --> 00:25:21,354
it's mainly when I'm happy.

389
00:25:22,981 --> 00:25:24,023
So thank you.

390
00:25:28,236 --> 00:25:29,612
Why didn't you tell me?

391
00:25:31,406 --> 00:25:33,241
Well, I had a girlfriend...

392
00:25:34,159 --> 00:25:36,828
in college, it was Alice...

393
00:25:36,911 --> 00:25:38,163
and she knew...

394
00:25:40,206 --> 00:25:41,791
but she didn't really know, you know?

395
00:25:44,794 --> 00:25:46,880
And because she was my first,

396
00:25:46,963 --> 00:25:49,757
I didn't know what would actually happen
when we finally...

397
00:25:53,553 --> 00:25:54,429
When you...

398
00:25:57,765 --> 00:25:58,933
That's-- It's not funny.

399
00:25:59,017 --> 00:26:01,603
-Oh, come on, it's a little bit funny.
-It's not at all--

400
00:26:01,686 --> 00:26:04,647
-How do you--? What--?
-Not in the least bit funny.

401
00:26:04,731 --> 00:26:06,649
-I'm sorry.
-Jesus Christ.

402
00:26:06,733 --> 00:26:09,444
Okay. You're right. It is not funny.

403
00:26:11,863 --> 00:26:14,365
You know, I came to, naked on my back...

404
00:26:15,408 --> 00:26:19,662
surrounded by EMTs, the RA, half the dorm.

405
00:26:19,746 --> 00:26:20,788
Alice thought I'd died.

406
00:26:23,374 --> 00:26:24,751
I mostly...

407
00:26:25,752 --> 00:26:28,129
steered clear of girlfriends since then.

408
00:26:28,213 --> 00:26:29,839
I can't afford the insurance.

409
00:26:33,468 --> 00:26:35,220
Today was a big deal for you, wasn't it?

410
00:26:39,641 --> 00:26:41,768
It was a really big deal for me too.

411
00:26:43,520 --> 00:26:46,481
Remember, I never date guys I think I have a future with?

412
00:26:50,318 --> 00:26:52,904
Let's quit while we're ahead.

413
00:26:52,987 --> 00:26:55,532
I took a risk. It was obviously a bad idea.

414
00:26:55,615 --> 00:26:58,201
Oh, hey, don't worry about it. We'll just take it slow.

415
00:26:58,284 --> 00:27:00,662
-We'll stick to boring, depressing dates.
-It won't work.

416
00:27:00,745 --> 00:27:04,749
-Wait. Like the botanical gardens or eating on a walk.
-It won't work. It's not that simple.

417
00:27:04,833 --> 00:27:08,294
-Symposiums, lectures, Roosevelt Island--
-Please...

418
00:27:09,379 --> 00:27:10,421
stop.

419
00:27:11,714 --> 00:27:13,675
-I need to check you again.
-Sure.

420
00:27:15,802 --> 00:27:19,430
I had a good time with you.
I just wanna remember it that way.

421
00:27:21,015 --> 00:27:23,059
All right. Look at me, please.

422
00:27:25,103 --> 00:27:29,065
-Pain, scale of one to 10? Ten is highest.
-Two.

423
00:27:29,149 --> 00:27:32,360
-All right. Any chills?
-No.

424
00:27:32,443 --> 00:27:34,362
-Dizziness?
-No.

425
00:27:34,445 --> 00:27:37,073
-No? Headache?
-Not anymore.

426
00:27:48,251 --> 00:27:51,171
"'How about his old bunny?'
the boy's governess asked.

427
00:27:51,254 --> 00:27:53,173
'That,' said the doctor,

428
00:27:53,256 --> 00:27:56,968
'why, it's a mass of scarlet fever germs,
burn it at once.'

429
00:27:57,552 --> 00:28:01,389
And so the little rabbit was put into a sack
with the old picture books

430
00:28:01,473 --> 00:28:05,435
and a lot of rubbish
and carried out to the end of the garden.

431
00:28:06,144 --> 00:28:10,190
That was a fine place to have a bonfire."

432
00:28:10,273 --> 00:28:13,151
This story is sad. Read something funny.

433
00:28:13,234 --> 00:28:14,903
-Yeah, funny.
-Yeah, funny. Funny.

434
00:28:14,986 --> 00:28:17,238
-This story is actually about something.
-Funny!

435
00:28:18,490 --> 00:28:21,284
-Really?
-Throw it in the bonfire!

436
00:28:21,367 --> 00:28:24,329
All right. Try this little baby here.

437
00:28:24,412 --> 00:28:29,125
This one is called <i>Where Did My Sweet Grandma Go?</i>

438
00:28:29,209 --> 00:28:32,837
-Okay. All right, time for a potty break, gang.
-Potty break!

439
00:28:32,921 --> 00:28:34,464
Yeah. You know what's going on.

440
00:28:34,547 --> 00:28:37,717
When we come back,
maybe Mr. Charlie will read <i>Walter the Farting Dog</i>, huh?

441
00:28:37,800 --> 00:28:39,135
-Yeah!
-Yeah!

442
00:28:39,219 --> 00:28:40,678
<i>Farts, farts, farts!</i>

443
00:28:40,762 --> 00:28:44,432
For your information,
Walter farts because he's been fed human food.

444
00:28:44,516 --> 00:28:47,018
-It's actually very sad.
-This field trip sucks.

445
00:28:47,101 --> 00:28:50,146
Hey, whoa, whoa! Not nice, Deangelo. Okay?

446
00:28:50,230 --> 00:28:51,773
Mr. Charlie's having a grumpy day.

447
00:28:52,982 --> 00:28:56,861
-Ignore him, Charlie. His dads are getting a divorce.
-Oh, my God.

448
00:28:57,362 --> 00:28:59,405
-Oh, what is she doing here?
-Nothing good.

449
00:29:01,366 --> 00:29:02,492
-What's up?
-Hey.

450
00:29:05,411 --> 00:29:06,246
Cool.

451
00:29:08,540 --> 00:29:09,916
How you doing, Charlie?

452
00:29:12,585 --> 00:29:13,837
I feel terrible.

453
00:29:14,295 --> 00:29:18,466
You had a nice, depressing date planned,
and I ruined it and made you crack your head open.

454
00:29:18,550 --> 00:29:22,387
-I think you should go.
-Wait. Is everything okay?

455
00:29:24,430 --> 00:29:26,099
I don't know how to answer that.

456
00:29:26,182 --> 00:29:27,642
You're back at work.

457
00:29:27,725 --> 00:29:29,811
Fine, then everything's stupendous.

458
00:29:29,894 --> 00:29:33,731
Look, I know, you wanted to take things slow,
and I messed it up.

459
00:29:33,815 --> 00:29:35,191
I just--

460
00:29:35,275 --> 00:29:41,156
I think I tried to get physical because I was trying to escape
the emotional connection we were having and--

461
00:29:41,239 --> 00:29:44,117
Fran, stop it, please? I don't wanna do this. I can't do it.

462
00:29:44,200 --> 00:29:48,288
-If you're looking for a boyfriend, I'm not him.
-Come on, I'm trying to figure out why I do this.

463
00:29:48,371 --> 00:29:51,207
You wanna have fun? You want to escape?
Look, meet my brother.

464
00:29:51,291 --> 00:29:52,125
Wait, what?

465
00:29:53,877 --> 00:29:57,297
-I don't want another relationship, Charlie.
-That's fine. You won't get one.

466
00:29:57,380 --> 00:30:01,676
-I guarantee within six weeks, he is out of there.
-Six weeks is 42 days.

467
00:30:01,759 --> 00:30:05,722
Yes, awesome multiplication, Frederick.
You believe this kid? Five years old.

468
00:30:05,805 --> 00:30:10,268
He's a hot male kindergarten teacher.
Look at that jawline. Snap him up.

469
00:30:10,351 --> 00:30:12,312
Hey, Cooper, do me a favor.

470
00:30:12,395 --> 00:30:17,275
Take this lovely lady out for a coffee.
Tell her about the time you went skydiving with Liza Minnelli.

471
00:30:17,358 --> 00:30:20,445
Correction. It was a small Asian man
who looked like Liza Minnelli.

472
00:30:20,528 --> 00:30:22,739
I am so confused, and frankly, a little offended.

473
00:30:22,822 --> 00:30:25,450
I don't wanna get coffee with your brother. No offense.

474
00:30:25,533 --> 00:30:28,870
Then go for tea or popsicles. Or don't go at all, I don't care.

475
00:30:28,953 --> 00:30:31,289
Just please, leave me alone.

476
00:30:38,046 --> 00:30:40,131
-Jeff Cho.
-What?

477
00:30:41,674 --> 00:30:43,009
His name was Jeff Cho.

478
00:30:45,136 --> 00:30:47,263
Oh, man, that was such a mistake.

479
00:30:47,347 --> 00:30:51,100
What was I hoping to hear?
"Oh, you tried to kill me, but that's all right. We're cool."

480
00:30:51,184 --> 00:30:53,019
Look, I know you feel bad.

481
00:30:53,102 --> 00:30:56,606
Take it from me, Charlie's gonna be fine.
He's used to this.

482
00:30:56,689 --> 00:31:00,109
I've seen that guy pass out after he caught a fish, okay?

483
00:31:00,193 --> 00:31:03,696
One time he found the prize
at the bottom of a box of Corn Pops, gone.

484
00:31:03,780 --> 00:31:06,491
Every time the Jets win, which luckily is very rare...

485
00:31:06,574 --> 00:31:09,327
Oh, phew, for a second there, I thought I was special.

486
00:31:09,410 --> 00:31:11,538
Oh, you know what I mean. Come on.

487
00:31:11,621 --> 00:31:14,833
-I do, and I am very comforted by your insults.
-Great.

488
00:31:14,916 --> 00:31:16,000
Thanks, Cooper.

489
00:31:16,084 --> 00:31:19,003
-Is that a family name? Never heard that before.
-Named after the dog.

490
00:31:19,087 --> 00:31:22,423
-That's not true.
-That is true, 100 percent.

491
00:31:22,507 --> 00:31:23,842
Yeah, it was a Saint Bernard.

492
00:31:23,925 --> 00:31:28,012
He died just before I was born,
and Charlie started calling me Cooper.

493
00:31:28,096 --> 00:31:29,305
I guess I was a hairy baby.

494
00:31:33,518 --> 00:31:34,894
Well, thanks for the pep talk.

495
00:31:37,021 --> 00:31:37,981
See you around.

496
00:31:39,858 --> 00:31:42,735
-Hey. Where are you headed?
-Cobble Hill.

497
00:31:42,819 --> 00:31:45,572
That's great. That's right on our way. We'll give you a ride.

498
00:31:45,655 --> 00:31:48,825
-Okay.
-Just a heads-up. The ride's a big yellow school bus.

499
00:31:51,619 --> 00:31:54,622
-Yeah, all right. Sure.
-Okay. Here we go.

500
00:31:54,706 --> 00:31:57,333
Hey, Deangelo. I got a new bus buddy.

501
00:31:57,959 --> 00:32:01,546
I guess she just wanted a chance to say
all the things she didn't say to you.

502
00:32:01,629 --> 00:32:04,257
It was actually kind of a word flood. Do you wanna hear?

503
00:32:05,341 --> 00:32:07,886
-No, not really.
-Yeah, I don't blame you.

504
00:32:08,887 --> 00:32:10,430
Leave it in the past.

505
00:32:15,351 --> 00:32:17,729
-We actually ended up hitting it off.
-Yeah?

506
00:32:17,812 --> 00:32:20,773
Yeah, she's a big laugher. I don't think I'm that funny, but...

507
00:32:20,857 --> 00:32:22,817
Come on. You're funny. I like your De Niro.

508
00:32:22,901 --> 00:32:23,985
-Yeah?
-Yeah.

509
00:32:25,528 --> 00:32:27,155
Oh, here we go. Here we go.

510
00:32:27,238 --> 00:32:28,490
<i>Cape Fear.</i>

511
00:32:29,115 --> 00:32:29,991
Do a line.

512
00:32:30,074 --> 00:32:33,036
-"I made him an offer he couldn't refuse."
-That's Brando.

513
00:32:33,119 --> 00:32:36,206
-Well, it's eventually him, right?
-Him before, yeah. I guess.

514
00:32:36,289 --> 00:32:39,334
-Kind of.
-Yeah. Do, like, <i>Goodfellas</i>.

515
00:32:39,417 --> 00:32:41,836
-"Look who's talking too!"
-Jesus Christ.

516
00:32:41,920 --> 00:32:43,838
No, I know that one's not right.

517
00:32:43,922 --> 00:32:45,423
"Were you talking to me?"

518
00:32:47,217 --> 00:32:48,676
That's honestly awful.

519
00:32:49,469 --> 00:32:53,014
Anyway, I thought, I don't know...

520
00:32:53,973 --> 00:32:54,974
Might ask her out.

521
00:32:56,226 --> 00:32:59,646
-Francesca?
-Yeah, you know, just if you're cool with it.

522
00:32:59,729 --> 00:33:02,148
-Yeah, I'm cool with it.
-Good. I don't wanna, you know...

523
00:33:02,232 --> 00:33:04,901
No, of course. Sure. Be my guest.
You two are perfect together.

524
00:33:04,984 --> 00:33:06,110
-You sure?
-Yeah, I said I'm sure.

525
00:33:11,324 --> 00:33:12,325
All right.

526
00:33:21,084 --> 00:33:23,545
A can of your cheapest beer, please.

527
00:33:23,628 --> 00:33:25,421
Cooper, what a nice surprise.

528
00:33:25,505 --> 00:33:30,135
All right. This place is great.
It looks like it hasn't changed in 50 years.

529
00:33:30,218 --> 00:33:32,011
You should see what it cost to make it that way.

530
00:33:32,095 --> 00:33:35,473
-Oh, yeah? Are you the owner?
-Me? No.

531
00:33:35,557 --> 00:33:37,976
I'm the day manager. You know, easy come, easy go.

532
00:33:38,893 --> 00:33:41,187
Still drinking Pabst in this neighborhood.

533
00:33:42,272 --> 00:33:44,941
We get it. It's terrible. You're hilarious!

534
00:33:46,651 --> 00:33:49,237
-Split it with me?
-No, no. I can't drink on the job.

535
00:33:49,821 --> 00:33:51,156
Should have been a kindergarten teacher.

536
00:33:54,200 --> 00:33:56,703
Maybe another time?

537
00:33:59,289 --> 00:34:02,750
I'm gonna take a break from men for a while.

538
00:34:02,834 --> 00:34:07,213
Especially since I almost killed the last one.
Last two, come to think of it.

539
00:34:07,297 --> 00:34:11,759
Well, you are in luck.
I've been told I'm very difficult to kill, so...

540
00:34:11,843 --> 00:34:16,347
I do enjoy talking to you, and I do find you charming

541
00:34:16,431 --> 00:34:20,810
in a sort of like Saint Bernard kind of way.

542
00:34:20,894 --> 00:34:22,645
-Yeah.
-But Charlie...

543
00:34:23,646 --> 00:34:27,692
Hey, he's the one who set us up.
I checked with him, and he's cool.

544
00:34:27,775 --> 00:34:29,402
I wouldn't be here if he wasn't.

545
00:34:29,486 --> 00:34:31,279
-Hey, Francesca?
-Yeah?

546
00:34:31,362 --> 00:34:34,407
Is it okay if I take my break early?
I need to call my grandmother,

547
00:34:34,491 --> 00:34:38,912
but there's a group of drunk bike messengers
who keep yelling the word "titties" in the background.

548
00:34:39,579 --> 00:34:40,914
Of course, sweetheart.

549
00:34:43,416 --> 00:34:47,003
Hi, I'm Bethany. I like your shirt. Is it pima cotton?

550
00:34:47,795 --> 00:34:51,090
I... don't know.

551
00:34:51,633 --> 00:34:54,135
You would know if it was pima.

552
00:34:54,219 --> 00:34:56,179
Pima cotton feels like baby hair.

553
00:34:57,138 --> 00:34:59,265
Yeah, I guess it doesn't feel like baby hair.

554
00:34:59,349 --> 00:35:02,644
Must be Egyptian cotton, then, which is also nice.

555
00:35:04,562 --> 00:35:05,480
Yeah.

556
00:35:09,025 --> 00:35:10,026
Okay, bye.

557
00:35:19,285 --> 00:35:21,204
Hey, hear me out.

558
00:35:21,287 --> 00:35:24,749
How would you feel if we set up Charlie
with someone a little more his speed?

559
00:35:24,833 --> 00:35:28,336
I went to a seminar last night on the history of sandals.

560
00:35:28,920 --> 00:35:33,591
It was called "Walk 10,000 Years in my Shoes."

561
00:35:33,675 --> 00:35:34,843
Bethany?

562
00:35:34,926 --> 00:35:37,720
Sounds like the kind of girl
who had her own horse growing up.

563
00:35:37,804 --> 00:35:40,640
I don't know about that.
I met her at the bar where Francesca works.

564
00:35:40,723 --> 00:35:44,686
-She's nothing like Francesca. She's more restrained.
-Like shy?

565
00:35:44,769 --> 00:35:48,022
No. No, not exactly. She's not real in-your-face.

566
00:35:48,106 --> 00:35:49,899
Actually, she's kind of hard to hear.

567
00:35:49,983 --> 00:35:53,069
You don't have to do this.
You can date Francesca without finding me a sub.

568
00:35:53,153 --> 00:35:58,616
I'll be honest. It started out that way,
but no joke, this chick is perfect for you.

569
00:35:58,700 --> 00:36:02,579
-One I can picture in sweatpants?
-Dude, full top-to-bottom sweat suit.

570
00:36:02,662 --> 00:36:03,705
Now that's just creepy.

571
00:36:04,747 --> 00:36:07,959
I'm not sure. The last thing I need right now is
to get overexcited again.

572
00:36:08,626 --> 00:36:11,087
-Yeah, I don't think that's gonna be a problem.
-No?

573
00:36:13,173 --> 00:36:14,007
Hello.

574
00:36:14,924 --> 00:36:18,845
I was wondering if you could point me
to the section of your library dealing with amaranth.

575
00:36:18,928 --> 00:36:21,222
Amaranth, the grain?

576
00:36:21,723 --> 00:36:22,891
Yes.

577
00:36:22,974 --> 00:36:26,311
The ancient grain, cultivated by the Aztecs,

578
00:36:26,394 --> 00:36:30,773
now enjoying a quinoa-like comeback,
thanks to its high protein content and nutty flavor.

579
00:36:33,985 --> 00:36:35,737
-Sure. Right this way.
-Okay.

580
00:36:39,365 --> 00:36:40,909
Here.

581
00:36:40,992 --> 00:36:43,328
<i>Amaranth and You</i>.

582
00:36:44,245 --> 00:36:49,459
Seems to have a lot of historical information
as well as recipes.

583
00:36:52,045 --> 00:36:54,172
-Thanks, Charlie.
-You're welcome. What?

584
00:36:55,423 --> 00:36:56,758
I'm Bethany.

585
00:36:56,841 --> 00:37:00,303
-They said we'd have a lot in common.
-Right. I guess they were right.

586
00:37:01,638 --> 00:37:05,266
-Because you like books.
-Yeah. I love them.

587
00:37:06,601 --> 00:37:09,020
I love the smell of them. The old books.

588
00:37:09,103 --> 00:37:11,523
Yeah, that-- You know, that's called furfural.

589
00:37:11,606 --> 00:37:14,734
-Furfural?
-Yeah. Furfural and vanillin.

590
00:37:14,818 --> 00:37:20,615
It's, like, they're volatile compounds
released by decomposing paper and glue.

591
00:37:20,698 --> 00:37:23,451
There's probably some mold in there as well.

592
00:37:23,535 --> 00:37:26,412
-Some people find it very, you know...
-Romantic.

593
00:37:26,496 --> 00:37:28,414
-Romantic, yeah.
-Yeah.

594
00:37:38,049 --> 00:37:42,720
So how does "Amaranth and Chickpeas
with Spring Lamb" sound?

595
00:37:45,849 --> 00:37:48,143
-Are you asking me out?
-No.

596
00:37:48,226 --> 00:37:54,023
No, I was just asking if that's something
I should make if you asked me out.

597
00:37:56,401 --> 00:37:58,778
All right. Bethany, would you like to go out sometime?

598
00:38:07,453 --> 00:38:08,288
Okay.

599
00:38:09,372 --> 00:38:11,541
Good. Friday?

600
00:38:13,209 --> 00:38:18,339
Friday, I have yarn-making class.
I'd skip it, but we're about to take on alpaca, so...

601
00:38:18,423 --> 00:38:20,925
Oh, yeah. Saturday?

602
00:38:21,009 --> 00:38:22,635
-Saturday's great.
-Yeah.

603
00:38:24,637 --> 00:38:26,473
I'll make amaranth.

604
00:38:26,556 --> 00:38:28,099
-Look.
-Please.

605
00:38:28,183 --> 00:38:29,225
<i>I like her.</i>

606
00:38:29,309 --> 00:38:32,061
She's pleasant.

607
00:38:32,145 --> 00:38:33,980
Yeah. Yeah, that's exactly what she is.

608
00:38:34,063 --> 00:38:35,148
-She's pleasant.
-Right?

609
00:38:35,231 --> 00:38:38,276
I met her, I said, "My God, that is one pleasant girl."

610
00:38:38,359 --> 00:38:40,487
Yeah, so we'll see how that goes.

611
00:38:42,363 --> 00:38:46,242
-You going out with Francesca?
-Mr. Cooper's got a girlfriend!

612
00:38:47,327 --> 00:38:51,331
All right. You know I don't like labels, Deangelo.
You all know that.

613
00:38:51,414 --> 00:38:55,043
And, yes, I am going out
with Ms. Francesca on Saturday night.

614
00:38:56,002 --> 00:38:59,589
Though where, I don't know. You gotta help me out.
What's this chick like to do?

615
00:38:59,672 --> 00:39:03,343
-Don't ask me. You're the one dating her.
-You set us up!

616
00:39:03,426 --> 00:39:04,803
Technically, sure.

617
00:39:05,929 --> 00:39:07,889
Look, she's intimidating, okay?

618
00:39:07,972 --> 00:39:11,184
I feel like sometimes
we're having three conversations at once

619
00:39:11,267 --> 00:39:13,895
-and I can't follow one of them.
-Jesus.

620
00:39:13,978 --> 00:39:15,647
All right. She's really into Bauhaus.

621
00:39:15,730 --> 00:39:18,733
There's an Oskar Schlemmer retrospective
right now at MoMA.

622
00:39:19,859 --> 00:39:23,613
That's exactly what I'm talking about. I need something fun.

623
00:39:23,696 --> 00:39:28,910
I need a good distraction.
It doesn't take much, and this chick goes dark.

624
00:39:28,993 --> 00:39:31,246
Cooper, she's having a tough time with her aunt.

625
00:39:31,329 --> 00:39:35,792
I know. I know, and it's super sad. It is.
So let's stop talking about it already.

626
00:39:35,875 --> 00:39:39,170
-I need to pee-pee!
-Yeah, you and me both, Frederick.

627
00:39:39,254 --> 00:39:42,632
All right. Come on, guys. Pick up the pace.
High knees, huh? Let's go.

628
00:39:42,715 --> 00:39:44,676
How about just going somewhere...

629
00:39:47,428 --> 00:39:48,346
noisy?

630
00:39:51,808 --> 00:39:54,227
-How's your pisco sour?
-What?

631
00:39:54,310 --> 00:39:56,563
The pisco sour. Is it good?

632
00:39:56,646 --> 00:39:59,691
Only for about six months.

633
00:39:59,774 --> 00:40:03,319
Before that, I was in San Francisco. Have you been?

634
00:40:05,155 --> 00:40:08,908
It's so good. Yeah, so tangy.

635
00:40:10,285 --> 00:40:11,828
Tangy!

636
00:40:14,122 --> 00:40:15,874
No one saw it coming.

637
00:40:15,957 --> 00:40:21,337
Here, everyone had psyched themselves up for alpaca
and the teacher breaks out yak wool.

638
00:40:21,421 --> 00:40:24,966
-One guy had to take a time-out.
-Sounds intense. Thank you.

639
00:40:25,049 --> 00:40:30,430
Crazy intense. I guess from now on,
I better not get too comfortable.

640
00:40:30,513 --> 00:40:31,890
Not if you know what's good for you.

641
00:40:34,267 --> 00:40:37,937
So this is amaranth and chickpeas.

642
00:40:38,021 --> 00:40:39,647
But no lamb.

643
00:40:39,731 --> 00:40:41,232
Sorry, I felt bad.

644
00:40:41,316 --> 00:40:45,487
Oh, no. That's fine. It looks amazing.
Thank you so much for cooking.

645
00:40:45,570 --> 00:40:47,155
You're welcome.

646
00:40:47,238 --> 00:40:49,574
I like to cook in other people's kitchens.

647
00:40:49,657 --> 00:40:52,744
It's like a little window into their souls.

648
00:40:52,827 --> 00:40:54,329
What did you see in mine?

649
00:40:54,954 --> 00:40:57,040
Extremely dull knives.

650
00:40:57,123 --> 00:40:59,751
That's more accurate than you'll ever know.

651
00:41:02,378 --> 00:41:03,213
It's good.

652
00:41:05,256 --> 00:41:07,884
-Do you have kids?
-What? No, why would you...?

653
00:41:07,967 --> 00:41:12,764
I saw you have some foam
taped to the corner of that table over there.

654
00:41:12,847 --> 00:41:16,100
Well, that's just what my sister does
for her son who's learning to walk.

655
00:41:16,184 --> 00:41:17,227
Goddamn it.

656
00:41:19,020 --> 00:41:22,398
-I don't mind kids, so...
-It's not that, Bethany.

657
00:41:24,400 --> 00:41:26,486
All right, there's something you deserve to know.

658
00:41:27,028 --> 00:41:33,368
I have cataplexy, which means that I can pass out
anytime I feel strong emotions.

659
00:41:33,451 --> 00:41:39,082
-Strong emotions? What do you mean?
-Could be anything, like fear, anger, surprise, all of that.

660
00:41:39,165 --> 00:41:41,125
In my case, it's mainly...

661
00:41:42,585 --> 00:41:43,753
It's mainly joy.

662
00:41:46,297 --> 00:41:47,298
That's horrible.

663
00:41:47,382 --> 00:41:49,634
Yeah, it's not great, but listen,

664
00:41:49,717 --> 00:41:54,597
there's nothing saying I can't feel mild, tepid emotions.

665
00:41:54,681 --> 00:41:56,432
I can go to town on those.

666
00:41:57,058 --> 00:42:01,146
Oh, gosh. Did I get you too worked up about the yarn?

667
00:42:03,356 --> 00:42:04,274
Nope.

668
00:42:06,067 --> 00:42:08,444
I guess we all have something weird about us.

669
00:42:09,571 --> 00:42:11,531
I'm sexually attracted to Bob Newhart.

670
00:42:18,955 --> 00:42:20,874
-What?
-"Rock Lobster"!

671
00:42:22,208 --> 00:42:23,459
-Come on!
-Okay!

672
00:42:23,543 --> 00:42:24,627
"Rock Lobster"!

673
00:42:51,988 --> 00:42:55,325
I brought over some movies, but now I'm wondering.

674
00:42:55,408 --> 00:42:57,368
Have you seen <i>Secret of NIMH?</i>

675
00:42:57,452 --> 00:42:59,871
I was such a basket case at the end of that.

676
00:42:59,954 --> 00:43:03,541
I think I'll be okay. I'm sitting down already.

677
00:43:05,585 --> 00:43:07,462
I think we should play it safe.

678
00:43:12,342 --> 00:43:13,259
Oh, hey.

679
00:43:15,929 --> 00:43:20,809
<i>We have shared the incommunicable experience of war.</i>

680
00:43:20,892 --> 00:43:23,895
<i>In our youths, our hearts were touched with fire.</i>

681
00:43:34,405 --> 00:43:39,619
<i>The Civil War was fought in 10,000 places,
from Valverde, New Mexico,</i>

682
00:43:39,702 --> 00:43:41,496
<i>and Tullahoma, Tennessee,</i>

683
00:43:41,579 --> 00:43:45,834
<i>to Saint Albans, Vermont,
and Fernandina on the Florida coast.</i>

684
00:43:47,836 --> 00:43:50,255
<i>More than three million Americans fought in it.</i>

685
00:43:50,338 --> 00:43:53,466
-This is nice. I feel really comfortable.
<i>-Over 600,000 men,</i>

686
00:43:53,550 --> 00:43:56,052
<i>2 percent of the population, died in it.</i>

687
00:43:56,136 --> 00:43:57,095
Yeah, me too.

688
00:43:59,305 --> 00:44:01,683
<i>American churches sheltered the dying...</i>

689
00:44:04,352 --> 00:44:08,481
Let me get you a cab, or we could share? You know, just--

690
00:44:08,565 --> 00:44:10,692
Hold on. It's my aunt.

691
00:44:10,775 --> 00:44:12,360
Is she waiting up for you?

692
00:44:12,443 --> 00:44:14,863
Not waiting up. More like throwing up.

693
00:44:14,946 --> 00:44:16,281
Oh, shit.

694
00:44:17,407 --> 00:44:18,241
All right.

695
00:44:18,324 --> 00:44:21,202
Come back to my place, open a bottle of wine.

696
00:44:21,286 --> 00:44:22,996
I can't. I gotta check on her.

697
00:44:23,496 --> 00:44:24,497
Of course.

698
00:44:26,040 --> 00:44:28,501
You know, I could help.

699
00:44:29,669 --> 00:44:31,629
-Don't worry about that.
-Okay.

700
00:44:31,713 --> 00:44:35,341
And besides, I'd like to keep this separate--
Us separate, if that's okay.

701
00:44:35,425 --> 00:44:38,803
-Yeah. Hey, think of me as your weekend escape.
-Thank you. Okay.

702
00:44:38,887 --> 00:44:41,473
Also free weekdays, so... But no pressure.

703
00:44:45,560 --> 00:44:46,895
Probably just walk it.

704
00:44:58,281 --> 00:44:59,574
What are you--?

705
00:45:01,075 --> 00:45:02,911
Crap, this hurts. How far am I?

706
00:45:02,994 --> 00:45:06,206
<i>Then your knee is facing up, and your toes are facing in.</i>

707
00:45:06,289 --> 00:45:07,332
About three feet.

708
00:45:08,750 --> 00:45:11,961
This girl says she can teach you to do the splits in a day.

709
00:45:12,045 --> 00:45:13,671
That girl is 9 years old, Sylvia.

710
00:45:13,755 --> 00:45:15,798
Cocky little shit.

711
00:45:15,882 --> 00:45:20,345
I'd like to see her do this after 60 years of lying around.

712
00:45:23,139 --> 00:45:26,518
-I want to talk to you about something.
-Yeah? What is it?

713
00:45:26,601 --> 00:45:31,564
Well, if I'm gonna have a mastectomy,
I'm thinking about getting implants.

714
00:45:31,648 --> 00:45:36,236
Really big ones, like double-Ds,
like proper gazongas.

715
00:45:36,319 --> 00:45:38,154
That's what you wanted to talk to me about?

716
00:45:38,238 --> 00:45:40,782
-I wanted to prepare you.
-Well, thank you.

717
00:45:40,865 --> 00:45:42,659
Do whatever makes you happy.

718
00:45:43,409 --> 00:45:47,205
So how's it going with Pooper?

719
00:45:47,288 --> 00:45:48,456
Cooper!

720
00:45:49,541 --> 00:45:53,545
It's going great.
It was a little bit weird dating Charlie's brother.

721
00:45:53,628 --> 00:45:56,756
But to be honest, I'm kind of glad he ended it.

722
00:45:56,840 --> 00:45:58,925
You're already taking care of one invalid.

723
00:45:59,008 --> 00:46:01,219
I mean, once I found out about his...

724
00:46:01,302 --> 00:46:02,846
situation<i>,</i>

725
00:46:02,929 --> 00:46:06,182
I didn't wanna risk hurting him again, you know?

726
00:46:06,266 --> 00:46:10,812
-Yeah, you were only thinking of him.
-And Cooper is so much more my speed.

727
00:46:10,895 --> 00:46:13,439
I mean, he is so much fun.

728
00:46:13,523 --> 00:46:15,525
He makes me laugh so much.

729
00:46:17,986 --> 00:46:19,612
So, what's next on my list?

730
00:46:20,947 --> 00:46:22,574
Here we go.

731
00:46:22,657 --> 00:46:27,287
You wanna go to one of those second-floor
Asian massage places near Penn Station

732
00:46:27,370 --> 00:46:29,664
and see if they actually do it. It?

733
00:46:30,206 --> 00:46:32,959
You know... it!

734
00:46:35,753 --> 00:46:39,799
Seriously? Whatever happened to hiking Machu Picchu?

735
00:46:39,883 --> 00:46:42,677
-What hike? I almost died.
-You whore!

736
00:46:46,347 --> 00:46:47,765
All right, just breathe.

737
00:46:49,809 --> 00:46:50,977
Give me that!

738
00:46:53,688 --> 00:46:54,522
Oh, you--

739
00:46:56,024 --> 00:46:57,025
Two to you.

740
00:46:59,068 --> 00:47:02,572
You bringing Bethany to Liza's on Thursday?
She's dying to meet her.

741
00:47:02,655 --> 00:47:06,826
-I guess so, yeah. You bringing Francesca?
-Yeah, probably.

742
00:47:06,910 --> 00:47:10,371
Well, it's a potentially talk-heavy situation.

743
00:47:10,455 --> 00:47:13,583
Did I tell you my newest discovery? Movie dates.

744
00:47:14,918 --> 00:47:17,253
Movie dates have actually been around for some time.

745
00:47:17,337 --> 00:47:20,924
Yeah, because they're amazing.
You talk too much, you get shushed.

746
00:47:21,007 --> 00:47:22,091
That's very clever.

747
00:47:22,175 --> 00:47:25,720
I think at some point, you might have
to actually talk to the woman you're dating.

748
00:47:26,805 --> 00:47:31,017
Yeah, I guess,
especially since we're apparently waiting to have sex.

749
00:47:31,100 --> 00:47:34,521
-What?
-Yeah. I haven't jerked it this much since high school.

750
00:47:36,564 --> 00:47:41,569
Interestingly, I found I've gone straight back
to Mexican telenovelas.

751
00:47:45,281 --> 00:47:47,534
I guess it's because of what happened with you.

752
00:47:47,617 --> 00:47:49,285
Why? What happened with me?

753
00:47:49,369 --> 00:47:53,873
Well, she said she wants to stop using sex
as a substitute for intimacy,

754
00:47:53,957 --> 00:47:57,919
or maybe it was the other way around.
I don't know. Anyway, it's all your fault!

755
00:47:58,002 --> 00:48:00,338
Yes! Yes!

756
00:48:00,421 --> 00:48:01,464
Oh, shit.

757
00:48:01,923 --> 00:48:03,091
I got you, brother.

758
00:48:03,174 --> 00:48:04,634
I got you.

759
00:48:04,717 --> 00:48:06,970
-You got it?
-Yeah. Got it. Yep.

760
00:48:08,054 --> 00:48:14,310
Here we have the Temple of the Great Jaguar
or the Temple Ah Cacao.

761
00:48:14,394 --> 00:48:20,275
It's a funerary pyramid
from the post-classic, classic period.

762
00:48:20,358 --> 00:48:22,986
Phenomenal. Just phenomenal.

763
00:48:25,238 --> 00:48:26,990
--to you, for sharing.

764
00:48:27,073 --> 00:48:32,120
In 1962, they found the tomb
of the great Mayan ruler Jasaw Chan K'awiil.

765
00:48:32,662 --> 00:48:37,834
-This is gonna take a K'awiil longer.
-K'awiil me now.

766
00:48:37,917 --> 00:48:43,590
And here, we're moving into the North Acropolis,
which is just beside the Great Plaza.

767
00:48:43,673 --> 00:48:46,593
Do you have any maps?
I'm having trouble tracking the layout.

768
00:48:46,676 --> 00:48:48,720
There's a great topographic survey coming up.

769
00:48:48,803 --> 00:48:50,263
Marv, where are the beach pics?

770
00:48:50,346 --> 00:48:53,141
You guys do anything
other than climb around old piles of rubble?

771
00:48:53,224 --> 00:48:56,227
All the recreational photos come
after the intermission.

772
00:48:56,311 --> 00:48:57,187
-Honey?
-What?

773
00:48:57,270 --> 00:48:58,605
Did he say "intermission"?

774
00:48:58,688 --> 00:49:02,317
-We might need to do some shots.
-That's what the intermission is for.

775
00:49:02,400 --> 00:49:03,526
Oh, Lord.

776
00:49:03,610 --> 00:49:04,444
Hey, babe.

777
00:49:04,527 --> 00:49:06,988
That's similar to the other pyramids I've shown you.

778
00:49:07,071 --> 00:49:09,949
This is the map to give you
a bit of lay of the land. There's Tikal.

779
00:49:10,033 --> 00:49:11,534
-Wake up.
-I'm not sleeping.

780
00:49:11,618 --> 00:49:13,453
-You were snoring.
-I was not.

781
00:49:13,536 --> 00:49:14,996
Then maybe it was me.

782
00:49:15,079 --> 00:49:16,664
Am I dreaming now?

783
00:49:16,748 --> 00:49:21,127
You'll know if I'm dreaming
if I start having sex with Nala from <i>Lion King</i>.

784
00:49:21,211 --> 00:49:23,338
Don't laugh. She was my first crush.

785
00:49:24,172 --> 00:49:26,174
You'll be out of breath around stair four.

786
00:49:26,257 --> 00:49:30,345
So is Belize on 110 or 220 volt electricity?

787
00:49:30,428 --> 00:49:34,390
-One ten, same as the U.S.
-Really, in spite of the British influence?

788
00:49:34,474 --> 00:49:37,602
-That's fascinating, really.
-Wow, you're not kidding.

789
00:49:41,564 --> 00:49:43,733
You sure are in a good mood today.

790
00:49:43,817 --> 00:49:44,984
-Me?
-Yeah.

791
00:49:45,068 --> 00:49:47,320
Yeah, I guess. This was fun.

792
00:49:48,655 --> 00:49:51,241
-Are you on a new med?
-No.

793
00:49:51,324 --> 00:49:54,160
I mean, I had a full-strength latte.

794
00:49:54,244 --> 00:49:56,538
-Why do you ask?
-Just...

795
00:49:56,621 --> 00:49:57,622
I don't know.

796
00:49:58,915 --> 00:50:03,545
You seemed so happy yukking it up with Francesca
and I was pretty sure you couldn't even talk to her.

797
00:50:04,546 --> 00:50:07,757
-That was before that.
-And you were like, "Oh, she's staying out there."

798
00:50:10,468 --> 00:50:12,178
So you're not happy at all?

799
00:50:12,262 --> 00:50:15,807
No. No, I guess I'm just unhappy enough.

800
00:50:15,890 --> 00:50:18,143
It's weird. Suddenly, I can be around her.

801
00:50:19,310 --> 00:50:20,895
-And that makes you happy?
-Yeah.

802
00:50:20,979 --> 00:50:21,813
Okay.

803
00:50:23,982 --> 00:50:27,402
Cooper's your shoe tack? Come on. Does he know?

804
00:50:27,485 --> 00:50:31,114
No, he doesn't, and I don't want you to tell him
because it'd make it weird.

805
00:50:31,197 --> 00:50:32,782
Yeah,<i> </i>that would make it weird.

806
00:50:34,367 --> 00:50:36,870
Is he holding out? Right?

807
00:50:37,328 --> 00:50:40,582
Dude, she's smoking.

808
00:50:40,665 --> 00:50:44,586
I mean, you know that I'm all about the boys, but I--

809
00:50:46,337 --> 00:50:47,172
I would.

810
00:50:49,549 --> 00:50:51,426
-Hey.
-Hey. Whoa, whoa, what?

811
00:50:51,509 --> 00:50:52,719
We need to talk.

812
00:50:52,802 --> 00:50:54,262
-Right now?
-Yeah.

813
00:50:55,889 --> 00:50:59,601
I can't do this anymore.
I'm literally dying from blue balls.

814
00:50:59,684 --> 00:51:01,019
Seriously? Can this wait?

815
00:51:01,102 --> 00:51:05,482
A man has needs, Charlie,
and I would think that a woman does too, but...

816
00:51:06,774 --> 00:51:07,734
Did that sting?

817
00:51:07,817 --> 00:51:10,028
-She's having a rough time at the moment.
-I know.

818
00:51:10,111 --> 00:51:12,739
I know she is. I know, and I feel for her, I do.

819
00:51:12,822 --> 00:51:16,367
I just don't know that I'm the guy.
I don't know that I'm cut out for this, you know?

820
00:51:18,119 --> 00:51:19,871
-We need to break up.
-No!

821
00:51:19,954 --> 00:51:24,709
-Absolutely not. You're getting along okay otherwise, right?
-Yeah.

822
00:51:24,792 --> 00:51:28,671
She's having problems
and you are helping a person with her problems.

823
00:51:28,755 --> 00:51:31,508
Don't just throw her away so that we never see her again.

824
00:51:31,591 --> 00:51:32,967
-We?
-You.

825
00:51:34,135 --> 00:51:36,221
Yeah, no. No, yeah. Right.

826
00:51:36,304 --> 00:51:40,016
-You're saying it's about her, it's not about me.
-It's definitely not about you.

827
00:51:41,100 --> 00:51:42,185
Oh, okay.

828
00:51:43,019 --> 00:51:45,730
-I can get to know her better.
-That's an idea.

829
00:51:45,814 --> 00:51:47,190
-She is interesting.
-Right.

830
00:51:47,273 --> 00:51:49,067
-Does not own a TV.
-Get out.

831
00:51:49,150 --> 00:51:51,736
No, really doesn't own a TV.

832
00:51:51,820 --> 00:51:52,737
There you are.

833
00:51:52,821 --> 00:51:56,908
Look at this as a chance to better yourself.
Learn to cook, take tango classes.

834
00:51:56,991 --> 00:51:59,244
Better still, I'll hook you up with a library card.

835
00:52:00,912 --> 00:52:02,539
-Okay.
-Right?

836
00:52:02,622 --> 00:52:05,667
Okay. Yeah, this is gonna be good. It's gonna be good.

837
00:52:05,750 --> 00:52:09,003
I read <i>The New Yorker </i>at the dentist.
I own corduroys. I can do this!

838
00:52:09,087 --> 00:52:10,505
I have faith in you.

839
00:52:10,588 --> 00:52:12,715
Plus, when we do have sex...

840
00:52:15,426 --> 00:52:16,845
I have less faith.

841
00:52:16,928 --> 00:52:17,762
Yeah.

842
00:52:19,222 --> 00:52:20,974
-Thanks, brother.
-You're welcome.

843
00:52:21,057 --> 00:52:22,725
-Couldn't do it without you.
-I know.

844
00:52:24,144 --> 00:52:25,937
Sorry. It's the blue balls.

845
00:52:27,605 --> 00:52:30,483
Marvin, thank you so much. That was thorough.

846
00:52:30,567 --> 00:52:34,195
It was my pleasure.
And sorry I couldn't get that audio track set up in time.

847
00:52:34,279 --> 00:52:37,949
It's really the groan of the howler monkey
that puts you back into the jungle.

848
00:52:38,032 --> 00:52:41,286
-It's like, it's--
-Oh, hey! We're fine. We're fine.

849
00:52:42,287 --> 00:52:43,371
Oh, you know what?

850
00:52:43,454 --> 00:52:47,000
Did you guys ever use
those groomsmen's presents we got you?

851
00:52:48,209 --> 00:52:50,503
-No. Not yet.
-What is it?

852
00:52:50,587 --> 00:52:54,048
We got them each a night at this B and B in Rhinebeck.
And especially for Charlie.

853
00:52:54,132 --> 00:52:57,802
-It's pretty boring out there.
-It sounds great.

854
00:52:57,886 --> 00:53:02,390
Anyway, I was thinking it would be kind of fun
if you guys all went together.

855
00:53:02,474 --> 00:53:04,392
-Yeah.
-I don't-- I don't know.

856
00:53:04,476 --> 00:53:07,061
-Let's do it. We could go apple-picking.
-Why not?

857
00:53:07,145 --> 00:53:10,273
-Are apples in season?
-Berry-picking.

858
00:53:10,356 --> 00:53:11,900
As long as we pick something, right?

859
00:53:12,901 --> 00:53:15,278
Sounds like fun. I mean, why not, right?

860
00:53:16,112 --> 00:53:16,946
Why not?

861
00:53:18,531 --> 00:53:20,325
-Sure, why not?
-Why not?

862
00:53:20,783 --> 00:53:21,868
Why not?

863
00:53:33,129 --> 00:53:34,005
This is it!

864
00:53:34,088 --> 00:53:36,257
-Do you guys see it?
-This is it!

865
00:53:36,341 --> 00:53:39,803
-Left. Left. Left turn. Left, left, left!
-Oh, here?

866
00:53:43,389 --> 00:53:45,934
-All right, babe! All right.
-Oh, thank goose.

867
00:53:46,017 --> 00:53:48,019
-Thank goose.
-"Thank goose"?

868
00:53:48,102 --> 00:53:50,063
I'm so relieved to be alive.

869
00:53:50,146 --> 00:53:52,273
-All right.
-Apollo 13 had an easier landing.

870
00:53:52,357 --> 00:53:53,900
-Need a hand?
-Yes, please.

871
00:53:54,776 --> 00:53:59,489
It's beautiful. I vote we stay here for the rest of our lives
and never get in that car again.

872
00:53:59,572 --> 00:54:02,575
We got here, didn't we? What a bunch of little bitches!

873
00:54:02,659 --> 00:54:06,913
Yeah, little bitches who would like
to survive the weekend. Thank you.

874
00:54:06,996 --> 00:54:08,331
Oh, what is this?

875
00:54:08,414 --> 00:54:10,792
It's my cello, in case we want to have a sing-along.

876
00:54:10,875 --> 00:54:13,878
-Can you sing along to cello?
-You can do anything you want.

877
00:54:13,962 --> 00:54:15,713
Attagirl. Let me. Let me.

878
00:54:16,422 --> 00:54:18,842
-Would you mind? Thanks a lot.
-No, please.

879
00:54:18,925 --> 00:54:21,177
-He's an animal.
-Please be careful. It's an antique.

880
00:54:21,261 --> 00:54:23,638
Hey, we'll get this stuff. You guys go check in, huh?

881
00:54:23,721 --> 00:54:25,723
-Yeah.
-Yeah, sure.

882
00:54:25,807 --> 00:54:27,016
-You got everything?
-Yeah.

883
00:54:27,100 --> 00:54:28,643
Hey, hey, hey.

884
00:54:28,726 --> 00:54:30,520
You sure you're okay with this?

885
00:54:30,603 --> 00:54:32,689
-With what?
-With me and Francesca.

886
00:54:32,772 --> 00:54:35,567
-You're acting kind of funny.
-Of course. I told you. It's fine.

887
00:54:35,650 --> 00:54:38,444
We went on, what, one date? And half of that in the ER.

888
00:54:38,528 --> 00:54:41,239
-It's in the past. I'm with Bethany now.
-Okay.

889
00:54:41,322 --> 00:54:43,658
Good. Because I think this weekend's it.

890
00:54:44,117 --> 00:54:44,951
It?

891
00:54:52,333 --> 00:54:53,251
Yeah.

892
00:54:53,334 --> 00:54:55,086
Congratulations. What's the occasion?

893
00:54:55,170 --> 00:54:57,964
There's no occasion. I'm just getting that vibe she's ready.

894
00:54:58,047 --> 00:55:01,259
Lord knows I've been ready. I tell you I'm off telenovelas?

895
00:55:01,342 --> 00:55:05,305
On to the Food Network.
Had a big old week with that Rachel Ray.

896
00:55:05,388 --> 00:55:08,475
That's upsetting. Giada De Laurentiis, maybe.

897
00:55:08,558 --> 00:55:09,726
Really?

898
00:55:10,393 --> 00:55:11,978
Hey, hey, hey!

899
00:55:12,437 --> 00:55:14,105
Hey, we're all checked in.

900
00:55:14,189 --> 00:55:15,773
This place is great!

901
00:55:17,066 --> 00:55:20,945
You're gonna love our room.
It's like something out of a <i>Nancy Drew</i> novel.

902
00:55:21,029 --> 00:55:22,780
I'm not sure what that means, but...

903
00:55:25,742 --> 00:55:28,495
Is that just little kisses?

904
00:55:28,578 --> 00:55:29,746
All right!

905
00:55:29,829 --> 00:55:32,165
Those two aren't wasting any time.

906
00:55:32,248 --> 00:55:34,375
Oh, gosh, I'm such a skank.

907
00:55:34,459 --> 00:55:38,546
By all means, carry on. I think we're gonna take a nap.

908
00:55:38,630 --> 00:55:41,966
Oh, no. Wait, wait, wait. Already? We just got here.

909
00:55:42,050 --> 00:55:44,552
I actually am feeling kind of carsick too.

910
00:55:44,636 --> 00:55:48,348
Come on. We haven't come all this way
just to sleep. Let's go antiquing.

911
00:55:48,431 --> 00:55:50,141
-Antiquing?
-Yeah.

912
00:55:50,225 --> 00:55:53,895
-Since when do you antique?
-Are you kidding? I love old crap.

913
00:55:53,978 --> 00:55:55,980
Could use another butter churn.

914
00:55:57,482 --> 00:55:59,526
You know, why not? Let's check out the town.

915
00:56:00,193 --> 00:56:02,946
We'll sleep tonight. Let's do it.

916
00:56:04,489 --> 00:56:05,824
We'll just-- Yeah.

917
00:56:08,243 --> 00:56:09,077
What?

918
00:56:11,037 --> 00:56:15,124
Oh, dang. It is muggy. Why didn't we take the car again?

919
00:56:15,208 --> 00:56:17,752
Because Francesca's driving and we value our lives.

920
00:56:17,836 --> 00:56:22,757
-It's not my fault New Yorkers drive so slow.
-Literally, no one else has ever thought that.

921
00:56:27,137 --> 00:56:28,513
Liza was right.

922
00:56:28,596 --> 00:56:30,348
This place is boring.

923
00:56:31,599 --> 00:56:33,810
Hey, well how about this one?

924
00:56:33,893 --> 00:56:36,563
It says "shop." Phenomenal.

925
00:56:37,230 --> 00:56:41,609
Yeah, I just wish there were more racist lawn jockeys.

926
00:56:41,693 --> 00:56:42,527
What?

927
00:56:43,486 --> 00:56:46,948
You know, I'm about ready to head back.

928
00:56:51,870 --> 00:56:57,125
No way! Is that a trombone
that someone turned into a lamp? Amazing.

929
00:56:57,208 --> 00:56:58,334
Oh, my God!

930
00:56:58,418 --> 00:57:00,670
My aunt had a tea set just like this.

931
00:57:00,753 --> 00:57:02,297
Oh, my God, is she an Oompa Loompa?

932
00:57:02,380 --> 00:57:03,923
-Yes, she is.
-Good for her.

933
00:57:05,341 --> 00:57:07,010
And this mixer! We had this!

934
00:57:07,093 --> 00:57:10,847
This thing is so loud. It would wake me
out of a dead sleep whenever she made pancakes.

935
00:57:10,930 --> 00:57:14,309
Speaking of, anybody feeling snacky?
I saw a taco place a couple--

936
00:57:14,392 --> 00:57:17,312
-Did you live with Sylvia growing up?
-On and off.

937
00:57:18,354 --> 00:57:22,150
It was really cool being a kid
and getting to come visit your fancy aunt in New York City.

938
00:57:22,233 --> 00:57:24,652
I got to spend an entire summer with her.

939
00:57:24,736 --> 00:57:28,698
It wasn't until later that I realized
it was so I wouldn't be around...

940
00:57:28,781 --> 00:57:30,700
to see my mom getting chemo.

941
00:57:30,783 --> 00:57:34,662
-When did she die?
-I was 17, senior year.

942
00:57:34,746 --> 00:57:36,122
Super sad.

943
00:57:38,291 --> 00:57:42,879
I dropped out and just started traveling.
I wanted to be a million miles from there.

944
00:57:44,631 --> 00:57:47,008
Never really came home again.

945
00:57:47,091 --> 00:57:49,969
Well, I guess Sylvia is my home.

946
00:57:50,053 --> 00:57:53,598
-She sounds like a fantastic lady.
-She is a pain in the ass.

947
00:57:53,681 --> 00:57:54,641
But I love her.

948
00:57:55,183 --> 00:57:56,684
-Oh, hey. Charlie?
-Yeah?

949
00:57:56,768 --> 00:57:59,938
-Could you give me a hand with this?
-I got you, Bethany.

950
00:58:00,021 --> 00:58:01,314
I'm a lot taller.

951
00:58:03,566 --> 00:58:04,901
Look at this sweet baby.

952
00:58:06,236 --> 00:58:09,948
-Do you think we should...?
-It's an instrument. It's for playing.

953
00:58:10,031 --> 00:58:10,865
Yeah.

954
00:58:12,992 --> 00:58:15,703
Oh, man. I guess it's broken.

955
00:58:15,787 --> 00:58:19,040
-Oh, wait, look. It's not plugged in.
-Yes!

956
00:58:19,123 --> 00:58:21,876
Have you ever seen such a nice display of birds' eggs?

957
00:58:22,377 --> 00:58:24,504
Okay, try it now. Yeah.

958
00:58:26,297 --> 00:58:28,925
All right!

959
00:58:29,717 --> 00:58:33,972
-Hey, I didn't know you played.
-Six years with Señora Paredes.

960
00:58:34,055 --> 00:58:36,432
-Hey! Guys!
-Do that again.

961
00:58:36,516 --> 00:58:38,977
Guys? That's really goddamn loud.

962
00:58:41,646 --> 00:58:42,480
Look!

963
00:58:43,439 --> 00:58:45,233
Now he comes!

964
00:58:45,316 --> 00:58:47,569
That organ's 50 years old!

965
00:58:54,409 --> 00:58:57,120
The world showed no compassion to me!

966
00:58:57,203 --> 00:59:01,958
Pitiful creature of darkness,
what kind of life have you known?!

967
00:59:02,959 --> 00:59:04,460
Did they rehearse this?

968
00:59:06,254 --> 00:59:07,755
Char, come on. Get out of the tub.

969
00:59:09,007 --> 00:59:11,259
-Unhand me, you lout!
-Get out.

970
00:59:11,342 --> 00:59:13,303
-Don't touch me!
-Get out of the tub!

971
00:59:13,386 --> 00:59:15,054
Never! No!

972
00:59:15,138 --> 00:59:17,849
-Are you gonna stop?
-Yes, I will. I'll stop.

973
00:59:25,857 --> 00:59:28,151
I know. I know.

974
00:59:28,234 --> 00:59:31,488
Maybe you need to slow down. I'm not saying anything.

975
00:59:31,571 --> 00:59:34,240
No. You're the one who brought up
the librarian convention.

976
00:59:34,324 --> 00:59:36,075
-That's true.
-Tell me. What is that like?

977
00:59:36,159 --> 00:59:37,410
You wanna hear about that?

978
00:59:37,494 --> 00:59:42,081
It's like tons of sex, tons of booze,

979
00:59:42,165 --> 00:59:45,126
tons of drugs, all in orthopedic footwear.

980
00:59:45,210 --> 00:59:46,461
-It is.
-More wine?

981
00:59:46,544 --> 00:59:49,088
-More wine. Thank you. That's the secret.
-In sensible shoes.

982
00:59:49,172 --> 00:59:51,716
-Yeah, sensible shoes.
-Oh, that's good.

983
00:59:51,799 --> 00:59:53,968
Hey, you wanna hear a Charlie story?

984
00:59:54,052 --> 00:59:57,680
He ever tell you that he won the sixth-grade talent show?

985
00:59:57,764 --> 00:59:59,808
This story's no good. You don't wanna hear this.

986
00:59:59,891 --> 01:00:02,519
You're being modest. You had the crowd on their feet.

987
01:00:02,602 --> 01:00:04,521
I want to hear. What was your talent?

988
01:00:05,897 --> 01:00:08,274
Come on, what was your talent?

989
01:00:08,358 --> 01:00:13,530
Tracy Turwell and I did the big scene
from <i>Streetcar Named Desire.</i>

990
01:00:13,613 --> 01:00:15,114
-You were Stanley Kowalski?
-I was.

991
01:00:15,198 --> 01:00:17,534
-Stella!
-Thank you. Sorry, everyone.

992
01:00:17,617 --> 01:00:19,285
-Sorry.
-Yes. Yes, no, exactly.

993
01:00:19,369 --> 01:00:21,371
-Thank you.
-Yeah, that was fantastic.

994
01:00:21,454 --> 01:00:23,706
-Only... That was two octaves lower.
-That was better.

995
01:00:23,790 --> 01:00:26,501
Because Charlie's an 11-year-old boy
whose voice has not changed.

996
01:00:26,584 --> 01:00:32,215
So there's a 4 foot, 80 pound kid on-stage
screaming, "Stella!"

997
01:00:32,298 --> 01:00:34,551
-Hot.
-Wow, thanks.

998
01:00:34,634 --> 01:00:36,052
That's not even the best part.

999
01:00:36,136 --> 01:00:40,932
-It is. I made grown men weep. What could be better?
-You blew the competition away. That's better.

1000
01:00:41,015 --> 01:00:44,894
The girl who played <i>Stairway to Heaven </i>on her oboe,
the boy who did the foxtrot with his mom.

1001
01:00:44,978 --> 01:00:49,107
-These are true.
-But Charlie, the modest boy that he is, sits quietly.

1002
01:00:49,190 --> 01:00:50,859
He hears his name called as the winner,

1003
01:00:50,942 --> 01:00:53,194
-he practically levitates out of his chair.
-Cooper.

1004
01:00:53,278 --> 01:00:55,405
-He sprints down the aisle. Come on.
-Cooper.

1005
01:00:55,488 --> 01:00:59,617
He almost gets to the stage, and right then, bam!

1006
01:00:59,701 --> 01:01:01,119
He's out like a light.

1007
01:01:01,202 --> 01:01:04,914
He takes a head-first dive into the orchestra pit,
splits his head open.

1008
01:01:04,998 --> 01:01:08,168
There's blood everywhere, kids are screaming.

1009
01:01:08,251 --> 01:01:09,669
Fire trucks arrive.

1010
01:01:09,752 --> 01:01:14,340
Long story short, long story short,
they cancel class for the rest of the day.

1011
01:01:14,424 --> 01:01:16,342
Now that is a talent.

1012
01:01:17,260 --> 01:01:18,428
So sad.

1013
01:01:18,511 --> 01:01:19,929
Hey, no. God, no.

1014
01:01:20,013 --> 01:01:24,267
-No, look, I won. I won. Nice work.
-What's the matter with you?

1015
01:01:25,935 --> 01:01:28,146
Everybody loved him for it.

1016
01:01:28,229 --> 01:01:29,397
Oh, come on.

1017
01:01:29,481 --> 01:01:30,398
Sorry.

1018
01:01:30,482 --> 01:01:31,524
Hey. Hey.

1019
01:01:33,693 --> 01:01:37,197
Growing up, I had this cat named Greg.

1020
01:01:39,282 --> 01:01:41,367
He had feline epilepsy.

1021
01:01:42,702 --> 01:01:46,039
My brothers had this strobe light
that they got from RadioShack,

1022
01:01:46,122 --> 01:01:49,626
and they would put it on him
to make him have seizures on purpose.

1023
01:01:50,793 --> 01:01:52,712
They said he was break-dancing.

1024
01:01:52,795 --> 01:01:54,172
God, kids are assholes.

1025
01:01:54,255 --> 01:01:55,507
Yeah.

1026
01:01:55,590 --> 01:01:57,967
Charlie reminds me a lot of Greg.

1027
01:02:01,304 --> 01:02:02,514
Right in here.

1028
01:02:03,556 --> 01:02:08,436
I don't know about anybody else,
but this walk down memory lane has got me pooped.

1029
01:02:08,520 --> 01:02:10,688
What do you say we hit the hay, huh?

1030
01:02:10,772 --> 01:02:12,857
-We haven't had dessert yet.
-I'm stuffed.

1031
01:02:12,941 --> 01:02:16,194
-They've got some pretty good ports over there.
-Prefer sherry.

1032
01:02:17,445 --> 01:02:20,114
Or cello. We haven't had our sing-along.

1033
01:02:21,157 --> 01:02:22,826
Greg loved it when I played.

1034
01:02:24,619 --> 01:02:27,205
It was the only thing that stopped his seizures.

1035
01:02:29,999 --> 01:02:31,000
By all means.

1036
01:02:32,544 --> 01:02:34,003
Let's hear some cello.

1037
01:03:55,084 --> 01:04:00,048
-Now, on to the fun portion of the evening.
-I can't walk any more.

1038
01:04:00,131 --> 01:04:01,841
-Ready?
-Yeah.

1039
01:04:03,635 --> 01:04:04,761
Here we go.

1040
01:04:06,763 --> 01:04:08,306
This is the speed horse.

1041
01:04:25,365 --> 01:04:27,116
You've got my robe?

1042
01:04:27,200 --> 01:04:28,034
Yeah, come on.

1043
01:04:29,244 --> 01:04:30,203
Perfect fit.

1044
01:04:34,040 --> 01:04:35,416
-Baby.
-What's up?

1045
01:04:35,500 --> 01:04:38,336
Don't get your man musk on it, please.

1046
01:04:38,419 --> 01:04:39,629
-Too late.
-No!

1047
01:04:41,756 --> 01:04:43,299
Make it stop.

1048
01:04:53,768 --> 01:04:54,644
Hello there.

1049
01:04:55,061 --> 01:04:56,062
Hey.

1050
01:05:00,733 --> 01:05:03,570
-Are those deer?
-Sexy deer.

1051
01:05:03,653 --> 01:05:05,655
Sexy deer. Yeah, they are.

1052
01:05:05,738 --> 01:05:07,282
And you're a...

1053
01:05:07,365 --> 01:05:10,702
Whatever hungry animal eats deer.

1054
01:05:10,785 --> 01:05:11,786
Mountain lion.

1055
01:05:12,954 --> 01:05:14,831
A hungry mountain lion.

1056
01:05:18,168 --> 01:05:19,836
No. No, much lower.

1057
01:05:20,920 --> 01:05:22,172
Less throaty.

1058
01:05:25,341 --> 01:05:26,176
What?

1059
01:05:26,259 --> 01:05:27,260
Yeah.

1060
01:05:27,343 --> 01:05:28,553
-Okay.
-Yeah.

1061
01:05:30,346 --> 01:05:32,432
-What?
-I'm the deer.

1062
01:05:32,515 --> 01:05:33,516
Oh, cool.

1063
01:05:35,977 --> 01:05:38,271
No, you're supposed to come to me.

1064
01:05:38,354 --> 01:05:39,939
-As the lion, right.
-Yeah.

1065
01:05:42,775 --> 01:05:44,152
Yeah, that's good.

1066
01:05:49,199 --> 01:05:50,617
You're really hungry.

1067
01:05:50,700 --> 01:05:52,577
-I am hungry.
-Yeah.

1068
01:05:52,660 --> 01:05:54,329
-Yes!
-Get over here!

1069
01:06:02,253 --> 01:06:03,296
You ready?

1070
01:06:04,547 --> 01:06:05,757
I'm ready.

1071
01:06:15,517 --> 01:06:17,018
Are you getting overexcited?

1072
01:06:18,645 --> 01:06:19,479
Good so far.

1073
01:06:40,542 --> 01:06:41,709
Oh, yeah.

1074
01:06:47,924 --> 01:06:49,175
Yeah!

1075
01:06:51,344 --> 01:06:53,972
Oh, hello.

1076
01:06:54,055 --> 01:06:55,765
It's always the quiet ones.

1077
01:06:57,851 --> 01:06:59,477
-Cooper! Cooper!
-What?

1078
01:06:59,561 --> 01:07:01,646
It's Charlie! It's an emergency.

1079
01:07:01,729 --> 01:07:02,564
Come on.

1080
01:07:06,401 --> 01:07:08,361
-Charlie.
-Oh, my God.

1081
01:07:09,529 --> 01:07:11,698
-Charlie! Hey, are you all right?
-Yeah.

1082
01:07:11,781 --> 01:07:14,576
Yeah, I think I just had a seizure.

1083
01:07:14,659 --> 01:07:16,661
-Oh, no.
-Just like Greg.

1084
01:07:18,288 --> 01:07:20,540
A seizure? Normally, you just go limp.

1085
01:07:21,875 --> 01:07:24,419
I guess this time, I had a seizure.

1086
01:07:24,502 --> 01:07:26,713
-We should call an ambulance.
-No. No ambulance.

1087
01:07:26,796 --> 01:07:29,507
That's-- Look, I'm fine. Honestly.

1088
01:07:29,591 --> 01:07:33,219
Yeah, you know, Charlie, seizures are deadly serious.

1089
01:07:33,303 --> 01:07:35,555
Yeah. You ought to be monitored.

1090
01:07:37,599 --> 01:07:41,936
No, because-- Look, Coop, I think it's passed.

1091
01:07:47,609 --> 01:07:49,694
Know what? Better safe than sorry. I'm calling.

1092
01:07:49,777 --> 01:07:50,653
-No! No!
-Yep!

1093
01:07:50,737 --> 01:07:53,698
-Yeah, I'm gonna call.
-No ambulance! No--

1094
01:07:53,781 --> 01:07:55,950
Look at that. I feel better.

1095
01:07:56,034 --> 01:07:57,827
Yeah, well, so it seems.

1096
01:07:59,162 --> 01:08:01,956
-Guess that means we can all go back to bed now.
-Yeah, absolutely.

1097
01:08:02,040 --> 01:08:04,250
I'm so sorry for the inconvenience.

1098
01:08:04,334 --> 01:08:05,251
Come on.

1099
01:08:05,335 --> 01:08:08,004
-Feel better.
-Thank you, I will. Yeah.

1100
01:08:14,803 --> 01:08:15,678
I'm sorry.

1101
01:08:16,596 --> 01:08:19,724
For now, I'm gonna have to deny you the booty.

1102
01:08:19,808 --> 01:08:22,769
-It's just not safe.
-I completely understand.

1103
01:08:28,149 --> 01:08:30,318
Hey. All right, easy, tiger.

1104
01:08:30,401 --> 01:08:34,364
-Give me a chance to get warmed up again.
-Yeah. For sure. Preheat that.

1105
01:08:37,534 --> 01:08:38,368
What?

1106
01:08:39,786 --> 01:08:42,455
-If that's Charlie, I'm gonna wring his neck.
-Could be my aunt.

1107
01:08:42,539 --> 01:08:45,750
So call her back in five minutes-- Forty-five minutes.

1108
01:08:48,044 --> 01:08:53,925
You know, I'm just starting to feel like you don't want me.

1109
01:08:57,220 --> 01:08:59,097
Is it because of the tattoos?

1110
01:08:59,180 --> 01:09:00,849
Yeah, I regret some of them.

1111
01:09:00,932 --> 01:09:03,143
Is this a little bit racist? Yes.

1112
01:09:03,226 --> 01:09:05,603
Did I intend it that way? No.

1113
01:09:06,146 --> 01:09:07,063
Her scan...

1114
01:09:09,065 --> 01:09:10,483
The cancer spread.

1115
01:09:12,944 --> 01:09:16,447
Oh, Francesca, I'm sorry.

1116
01:09:16,531 --> 01:09:18,366
Oh, my God.

1117
01:09:18,449 --> 01:09:19,450
This is it.

1118
01:09:20,994 --> 01:09:22,704
This is when I lose her.

1119
01:09:22,787 --> 01:09:24,372
No.

1120
01:09:27,167 --> 01:09:28,209
She's...

1121
01:09:30,837 --> 01:09:32,422
She's gonna be good.

1122
01:09:34,340 --> 01:09:36,467
Yeah, she is, she's gonna be good.

1123
01:09:43,266 --> 01:09:44,142
What's that?

1124
01:09:49,772 --> 01:09:51,149
Unbelievable.

1125
01:09:51,232 --> 01:09:53,526
I'm sorry. You have an amazing ass.

1126
01:09:53,610 --> 01:09:55,737
My aunt is dying of cancer.

1127
01:09:55,820 --> 01:09:57,447
It doesn't know that.

1128
01:09:58,948 --> 01:10:00,158
Seriously?

1129
01:10:00,867 --> 01:10:02,410
I gotta get out of here.

1130
01:10:07,832 --> 01:10:10,752
I'm not turned on because she's got cancer.

1131
01:10:19,469 --> 01:10:23,264
-Somewhere buried in there is a compliment.
-Hey, what happened?

1132
01:10:34,484 --> 01:10:36,528
I don't want to talk about it, Cooper.

1133
01:10:38,947 --> 01:10:40,198
I should have known.

1134
01:10:42,617 --> 01:10:44,828
I brought this.

1135
01:10:46,162 --> 01:10:47,038
Thanks.

1136
01:10:53,044 --> 01:10:56,256
You don't have to be out here.
I can deal with this on my own.

1137
01:10:56,339 --> 01:10:58,800
Death and despair are my specialties. You know that.

1138
01:10:58,883 --> 01:11:01,761
If she makes a miraculous recovery,
then you're on your own.

1139
01:11:04,806 --> 01:11:08,852
-You know the constellations?
-Please, I grew up in the city.

1140
01:11:09,978 --> 01:11:12,939
First star I saw was in the blackout of 2003.

1141
01:11:16,818 --> 01:11:22,157
I used to sit outside for hours as a kid, making up my own.

1142
01:11:23,575 --> 01:11:26,578
Flamingo with a suitcase.

1143
01:11:26,661 --> 01:11:27,829
If you say so.

1144
01:11:32,709 --> 01:11:35,211
It's nice to know they'll always be there.

1145
01:11:42,552 --> 01:11:43,553
How long does she have?

1146
01:11:44,596 --> 01:11:46,890
She might buy some time with chemo...

1147
01:11:48,600 --> 01:11:51,186
but it metastasized to her liver, so...

1148
01:11:53,897 --> 01:11:55,148
So that sucks.

1149
01:11:57,525 --> 01:12:01,321
Anything she's always wanted to do?
Climb a mountain? Travel to India?

1150
01:12:01,404 --> 01:12:03,948
Fire a rocket launcher at a Dodge Caravan.

1151
01:12:04,032 --> 01:12:04,866
What?

1152
01:12:06,910 --> 01:12:09,037
Her ex used to drive one.

1153
01:12:11,456 --> 01:12:13,291
She's done all that other stuff, you know?

1154
01:12:13,374 --> 01:12:15,293
I mean, that's the thing about Sylvia.

1155
01:12:16,419 --> 01:12:20,131
She doesn't wait for anybody's permission.
She just goes for it.

1156
01:12:20,215 --> 01:12:22,091
-She's a badass.
-Yeah.

1157
01:12:24,135 --> 01:12:26,304
Not a lot of people live that way. I know I don't.

1158
01:12:32,602 --> 01:12:34,354
Charlie,

1159
01:12:34,437 --> 01:12:36,272
the day you fell,

1160
01:12:36,356 --> 01:12:39,275
you said you couldn't be around me anymore, you know?

1161
01:12:39,359 --> 01:12:43,613
We've seen each other almost every day since...

1162
01:12:43,696 --> 01:12:44,823
and here we are.

1163
01:12:44,906 --> 01:12:46,908
Yeah, but this is incredibly depressing.

1164
01:12:48,201 --> 01:12:49,244
Come on.

1165
01:12:51,079 --> 01:12:53,248
At the antique store today?

1166
01:12:53,331 --> 01:12:57,836
I mean, you looked like you were having fun.
You were happy.

1167
01:13:01,840 --> 01:13:03,550
I wasn't happy. I was amused.

1168
01:13:07,011 --> 01:13:07,929
Right.

1169
01:13:09,139 --> 01:13:12,183
I was a little bit more than amused. I was happy.

1170
01:13:13,143 --> 01:13:14,602
Hey. Hey, Francesca.

1171
01:13:14,686 --> 01:13:16,354
-What?
-Wait. Please?

1172
01:13:16,437 --> 01:13:18,064
Okay, I was happy.

1173
01:13:20,483 --> 01:13:24,654
I am happy. I'm happier than I've ever been.
And that's because of you.

1174
01:13:26,739 --> 01:13:28,074
-You're still standing.
-I know.

1175
01:13:28,158 --> 01:13:30,451
Shouldn't work, right? I should be flat on my face.

1176
01:13:30,535 --> 01:13:33,872
But the thing is, every time I feel it,

1177
01:13:33,955 --> 01:13:36,583
the happiness rising in me,

1178
01:13:37,917 --> 01:13:39,961
I look at you and Cooper...

1179
01:13:42,005 --> 01:13:43,256
and I'm just sad enough.

1180
01:13:45,008 --> 01:13:48,011
But I'm dating your brother. I mean, you set us up.

1181
01:13:48,094 --> 01:13:50,472
I know. That's why it works.

1182
01:14:01,274 --> 01:14:04,402
-I don't think we need to be around each other anymore.
-Francesca.

1183
01:14:07,822 --> 01:14:08,781
Francesca.

1184
01:14:12,160 --> 01:14:16,247
Bethany, what are you doing out here?
There's bugs, all sorts.

1185
01:14:17,665 --> 01:14:19,417
There's something really wrong with you.

1186
01:14:20,376 --> 01:14:21,294
Yeah.

1187
01:14:22,504 --> 01:14:23,713
I know.

1188
01:14:23,796 --> 01:14:26,508
I tried to be upfront.

1189
01:14:26,591 --> 01:14:27,550
Not that.

1190
01:14:28,176 --> 01:14:29,010
You.

1191
01:14:30,595 --> 01:14:31,429
Me?

1192
01:14:32,555 --> 01:14:34,265
I am fun, Charlie.

1193
01:14:35,600 --> 01:14:38,228
-I'm really fun.
-Of course, you are. You're tons of fun.

1194
01:14:40,480 --> 01:14:41,856
And I'm also pretty.

1195
01:14:43,399 --> 01:14:44,984
I've been told that I'm pretty.

1196
01:14:45,985 --> 01:14:47,111
You're beautiful.

1197
01:14:48,279 --> 01:14:51,366
You let me think we actually had a chance.

1198
01:14:54,202 --> 01:14:55,370
I wanna break up.

1199
01:14:57,247 --> 01:14:58,706
I completely understand.

1200
01:16:34,260 --> 01:16:35,678
-Hey.
-Hi.

1201
01:16:35,762 --> 01:16:37,764
Hey, come on in.

1202
01:16:39,057 --> 01:16:41,810
-How's Silvia doing?
-She's hanging in there.

1203
01:16:43,561 --> 01:16:45,104
-Sunflowers.
-Yeah.

1204
01:16:45,188 --> 01:16:48,733
-They're my favorite.
-From a real florist too. Not just Trader Joe's.

1205
01:16:48,817 --> 01:16:50,693
Well, now I know I'm special.

1206
01:16:51,861 --> 01:16:53,029
What's this?

1207
01:16:54,239 --> 01:16:56,658
This is also for you.

1208
01:16:58,618 --> 01:17:00,745
-What is it?
-That's the thing.

1209
01:17:00,829 --> 01:17:02,997
You know, I didn't exactly pick it out.

1210
01:17:03,081 --> 01:17:05,875
I just sort of brought--

1211
01:17:06,876 --> 01:17:08,419
My aunt's mixer.

1212
01:17:08,962 --> 01:17:10,421
You remembered.

1213
01:17:10,505 --> 01:17:11,756
Yeah, I sure did.

1214
01:17:12,465 --> 01:17:13,591
I love it.

1215
01:17:14,759 --> 01:17:16,427
-Thank you.
-Yeah.

1216
01:17:16,511 --> 01:17:19,264
I'm really sorry that I blew up at you the other day.

1217
01:17:19,347 --> 01:17:20,682
It's just--

1218
01:17:20,765 --> 01:17:22,976
-It's been so hard.
-Yeah.

1219
01:17:23,059 --> 01:17:24,769
Hey, you know.

1220
01:17:24,853 --> 01:17:29,023
When one loses someone one loves, one has to...

1221
01:17:30,275 --> 01:17:35,155
look at one's sense of...

1222
01:17:37,157 --> 01:17:39,075
-oneself.
-Yeah. Okay.

1223
01:17:39,159 --> 01:17:40,368
-Thank you.
-Okay.

1224
01:17:42,996 --> 01:17:44,455
All right.

1225
01:17:44,539 --> 01:17:48,418
-Come on, let's go get you some lunch.
-Oh, you know what?

1226
01:17:48,501 --> 01:17:52,046
I don't feel like being in a crowded restaurant.
Why don't we just order in?

1227
01:17:52,130 --> 01:17:54,716
Come on. It's nice out there.
We'll find a place with a patio.

1228
01:17:54,799 --> 01:17:56,843
I'm really just-- I'm exhausted.

1229
01:17:59,053 --> 01:18:01,806
Oh, I thought you'd want to get your mind off your aunt.

1230
01:18:01,890 --> 01:18:03,224
I do.

1231
01:18:03,308 --> 01:18:06,311
I just can't keep running away from it, you know?

1232
01:18:06,394 --> 01:18:08,271
Just gotta deal with it...

1233
01:18:09,731 --> 01:18:11,733
so you wanna help me deal with it?

1234
01:18:13,026 --> 01:18:14,486
Yeah. Oh, yeah.

1235
01:18:15,528 --> 01:18:16,696
Let's deal with it.

1236
01:18:19,782 --> 01:18:23,119
So just lay it all out there.

1237
01:18:24,787 --> 01:18:27,415
What do you fear most about your aunt dying?

1238
01:18:29,542 --> 01:18:30,418
Okay.

1239
01:18:35,798 --> 01:18:36,925
To start...

1240
01:18:38,009 --> 01:18:39,052
missing her.

1241
01:18:42,013 --> 01:18:43,681
Feeling alone in the world.

1242
01:18:45,725 --> 01:18:51,022
Like, I didn't make the best of our time together,
and I'll never have those days back.

1243
01:18:51,105 --> 01:18:52,565
My childhood.

1244
01:18:52,649 --> 01:18:56,778
I would rather it were me,
so I wasn't the one stuck here without her.

1245
01:18:56,861 --> 01:18:58,696
She's my best friend.

1246
01:19:01,199 --> 01:19:04,244
You know, Francesca...

1247
01:19:05,954 --> 01:19:11,709
I should go.

1248
01:19:12,669 --> 01:19:13,503
-What?
-Yeah.

1249
01:19:13,586 --> 01:19:15,964
-Where are you going? I poured my heart out.
-No, I know.

1250
01:19:16,047 --> 01:19:19,676
I know you did, and I encouraged it,
so it's just as much on me.

1251
01:19:19,759 --> 01:19:21,136
You're being such an asshole!

1252
01:19:21,219 --> 01:19:25,807
I know. No, you're right. I am.
Just know, I don't feel great about it.

1253
01:19:25,890 --> 01:19:29,227
How can you be so thoughtful one minute,
and then such a dick the next?

1254
01:19:29,310 --> 01:19:30,270
Because...

1255
01:19:31,896 --> 01:19:34,274
Because I wasn't really that thoughtful.

1256
01:19:38,153 --> 01:19:41,531
I am so sorry. Just-- Bye.

1257
01:20:11,686 --> 01:20:12,812
Watch it, shit-bag!

1258
01:20:12,896 --> 01:20:16,107
-Thank you, New York.
-What'd you just say to me?

1259
01:20:18,943 --> 01:20:19,777
Hey.

1260
01:20:27,702 --> 01:20:28,703
She loved the mixer.

1261
01:20:29,162 --> 01:20:30,830
Oh, yeah? What'd she say?

1262
01:20:31,789 --> 01:20:33,041
"I love the mixer."

1263
01:20:34,584 --> 01:20:36,085
Good, I'm glad.

1264
01:20:38,129 --> 01:20:41,508
All it took was one sad attempt at a conversation to end it.

1265
01:20:41,591 --> 01:20:44,552
Couldn't we have just not had
that conversation a few weeks ago?

1266
01:20:44,636 --> 01:20:48,389
What a waste.
All this time, you could have been humping it up.

1267
01:20:49,349 --> 01:20:52,644
Why do I keep attracting such vapid men?

1268
01:20:52,727 --> 01:20:56,439
-Unless, of course, it's the other way around.
-They attract me?

1269
01:20:56,523 --> 01:21:00,026
Like, I'm into some sort of pheromone in hair gel?

1270
01:21:00,527 --> 01:21:04,322
I think you're attracted to what they aren't
as much as what they are.

1271
01:21:04,405 --> 01:21:07,450
You lost me, Yoda. That's not a dig at your bald head.

1272
01:21:07,534 --> 01:21:09,077
Better not be.

1273
01:21:09,160 --> 01:21:11,120
Sylvia Torrone?

1274
01:21:11,204 --> 01:21:14,749
-How you feeling, hon?
-A lot better now than I will be in an hour.

1275
01:21:14,833 --> 01:21:15,667
Here.

1276
01:21:17,126 --> 01:21:21,422
-Face it, Francesca. You're a total fox.
-Oh, stop it. I am not.

1277
01:21:21,506 --> 01:21:25,426
You know you are,
and it is so annoying when you deny it.

1278
01:21:25,510 --> 01:21:27,637
Fine, what's your point?

1279
01:21:27,720 --> 01:21:29,722
My point is,

1280
01:21:29,806 --> 01:21:32,225
men will always want you,

1281
01:21:32,308 --> 01:21:36,146
but it takes a special kind of man to love you

1282
01:21:36,229 --> 01:21:39,566
and to appreciate just how truly special you are.

1283
01:21:39,649 --> 01:21:42,235
You know you gave me that speech
when I had a unibrow, right?

1284
01:21:42,318 --> 01:21:44,737
Yeah, I was lying then. But this is about Charlie.

1285
01:21:45,864 --> 01:21:47,991
He rejected me.

1286
01:21:48,074 --> 01:21:50,827
He's just doing what you do, protecting yourself.

1287
01:21:53,663 --> 01:21:55,123
This goddamn place.

1288
01:21:56,374 --> 01:21:57,417
I know.

1289
01:22:06,301 --> 01:22:09,012
-What exactly was your plan?
-What?

1290
01:22:09,471 --> 01:22:13,808
Help us patch things up and just go on being miserable?

1291
01:22:13,892 --> 01:22:17,520
-What makes you think I'm miserable?
-Your face.

1292
01:22:17,604 --> 01:22:19,272
Your miserable face.

1293
01:22:19,355 --> 01:22:22,609
I just thought it would make her happy.

1294
01:22:23,568 --> 01:22:26,863
Well, it didn't really work out like that. We broke up.

1295
01:22:26,946 --> 01:22:27,906
What? Why?

1296
01:22:29,115 --> 01:22:31,117
Because I'm not in love with her and you are.

1297
01:22:36,164 --> 01:22:37,582
<i>Charlie does love me.</i>

1298
01:22:37,665 --> 01:22:39,626
Did he tell you?

1299
01:22:39,709 --> 01:22:41,002
As best he could.

1300
01:22:41,878 --> 01:22:43,129
Do you love him?

1301
01:22:49,177 --> 01:22:51,846
-How can I?
-Oh, Francesca.

1302
01:22:52,597 --> 01:22:56,768
You can't keep yourself from loving someone
just because you're afraid you're gonna lose them.

1303
01:23:02,565 --> 01:23:06,945
-But that didn't stop you from dating her, did it?
-No. It did not, and I regret that.

1304
01:23:07,028 --> 01:23:10,990
Not because I swooped on you,
but because you wanted me to.

1305
01:23:11,074 --> 01:23:12,408
What the hell does that mean?

1306
01:23:13,576 --> 01:23:17,372
Our whole lives, I have been running interference for you.

1307
01:23:17,455 --> 01:23:20,375
I've been taking your hits, I've been watching your back.

1308
01:23:20,458 --> 01:23:22,627
And for a long time, I liked that.

1309
01:23:22,710 --> 01:23:26,005
I liked being that guy, little bro looking out for big bro.

1310
01:23:26,089 --> 01:23:27,340
Whoa, easy. Easy, little bro.

1311
01:23:27,423 --> 01:23:31,219
Hey, you know it's true. You know it's true.
I thought I was protecting you, and I wasn't.

1312
01:23:31,302 --> 01:23:32,554
-You were using me.
-What?

1313
01:23:32,637 --> 01:23:35,890
-To hide behind, to manipulate, like I'm some--
-Where is this coming from?

1314
01:23:35,974 --> 01:23:40,353
Where's this coming from? You treat me
like I'm a big, dumb, emotional battering ram.

1315
01:23:40,436 --> 01:23:43,565
And I'm done!
I'm done being your emotional battering ram.

1316
01:23:43,648 --> 01:23:46,192
-Look, no, you are not my--
-Battering ram.

1317
01:23:46,276 --> 01:23:49,904
Whatever that, yeah, look,
just get over yourself for one second.

1318
01:23:49,988 --> 01:23:52,157
You don't have this shitty disease, Cooper.

1319
01:23:52,240 --> 01:23:57,704
You don't live in fear of making a fool of yourself all the time,
or maybe, I don't know, fucking dying.

1320
01:23:57,787 --> 01:24:01,749
You get to live your life exactly how you wanna live it,
and you still fuck it up!

1321
01:24:01,833 --> 01:24:03,918
-Thanks.
-You're welcome.

1322
01:24:04,002 --> 01:24:05,211
You know what?

1323
01:24:05,295 --> 01:24:07,505
Charlie, I know better than anyone.

1324
01:24:07,589 --> 01:24:11,217
-I know better than anyone how awful this disease is.
-You do?

1325
01:24:11,301 --> 01:24:12,635
I've seen kids laugh at you.

1326
01:24:14,137 --> 01:24:17,849
You understand that?
I watched kids laugh at my big brother.

1327
01:24:17,932 --> 01:24:20,059
I've seen you be alone.

1328
01:24:20,143 --> 01:24:21,478
That sucks, man.

1329
01:24:21,561 --> 01:24:22,562
I'm sorry.

1330
01:24:23,730 --> 01:24:27,984
-There is a point where the disease ends and fear sets in.
-Oh, not this.

1331
01:24:28,067 --> 01:24:29,235
And it becomes an excuse!

1332
01:24:29,319 --> 01:24:32,572
Oh, my God! You just said you understand!

1333
01:24:32,655 --> 01:24:34,532
You don't understand that nobody wants to go on a date

1334
01:24:34,616 --> 01:24:37,452
with a guy who's gonna end up in the ER
as soon as they kiss.

1335
01:24:37,535 --> 01:24:40,205
Being in a relationship is about being happy!

1336
01:24:40,288 --> 01:24:43,541
-I can't do that!
-Yes, yes, you can. You can!

1337
01:24:43,625 --> 01:24:47,587
You just have to learn to be okay
with what comes next. That's all.

1338
01:24:52,133 --> 01:24:53,510
Go, Charlie.

1339
01:24:55,678 --> 01:24:56,763
Hey, hey.

1340
01:24:57,806 --> 01:24:59,265
-Go get her.
-I can't.

1341
01:24:59,349 --> 01:25:02,352
-Watch it.
-No, you watch it. You understand?

1342
01:25:02,435 --> 01:25:04,270
I mean, do you actually understand?

1343
01:25:04,354 --> 01:25:07,023
I can't. You can. You can, but I can't.

1344
01:25:07,106 --> 01:25:09,651
-You're gonna get yourself worked up.
-I wanna get worked up!

1345
01:25:09,734 --> 01:25:11,861
Why do I never get to be worked up?!

1346
01:25:13,238 --> 01:25:15,406
Take a breath, okay?

1347
01:25:15,490 --> 01:25:16,574
Calm down.

1348
01:25:17,200 --> 01:25:18,368
Why?

1349
01:25:21,079 --> 01:25:22,372
Why?

1350
01:25:24,624 --> 01:25:25,458
Why?

1351
01:25:29,295 --> 01:25:30,129
Why?

1352
01:25:31,422 --> 01:25:32,507
Charlie!

1353
01:25:35,552 --> 01:25:37,428
You gotta wake up, Charlie! I can't hold on!

1354
01:25:38,763 --> 01:25:39,597
Charlie!

1355
01:25:40,765 --> 01:25:41,808
Help!

1356
01:25:46,646 --> 01:25:47,564
Charlie!

1357
01:25:52,360 --> 01:25:53,945
Come on! Come on! Come on!

1358
01:25:57,240 --> 01:25:59,200
-Come on.
-I got you! I got you!

1359
01:26:01,828 --> 01:26:02,829
Jesus.

1360
01:26:04,747 --> 01:26:06,166
You all right, shit-bag?

1361
01:26:07,500 --> 01:26:08,501
You're all right.

1362
01:26:09,544 --> 01:26:10,461
Thank you!

1363
01:26:11,546 --> 01:26:12,797
Thank you, New York!

1364
01:26:21,097 --> 01:26:21,973
Yeah, okay.

1365
01:26:24,100 --> 01:26:26,102
-Okay, what?
-I'll go.

1366
01:26:28,188 --> 01:26:30,356
-You'll go?
-Yeah.

1367
01:26:30,440 --> 01:26:34,486
-Sunday morning, after yoga.
-Oh, Charlie. No Sunday, no yoga.

1368
01:26:34,569 --> 01:26:36,070
You go right now!

1369
01:26:36,154 --> 01:26:37,530
-Right now?
-Come on!

1370
01:26:37,614 --> 01:26:39,073
-What?
-Come on!

1371
01:26:39,157 --> 01:26:41,075
All right. How do I look?

1372
01:26:41,159 --> 01:26:43,536
Terrible. You smell awful.

1373
01:26:43,620 --> 01:26:46,498
You're wearing a stupid tiny backpack.

1374
01:26:46,581 --> 01:26:48,500
-But you gotta go.
-I gotta go.

1375
01:26:48,583 --> 01:26:49,626
You gotta go.

1376
01:26:58,760 --> 01:27:00,136
Go be happy.

1377
01:27:04,140 --> 01:27:05,183
Go be happy.

1378
01:27:17,904 --> 01:27:19,572
Answer the phone, Francesca.

1379
01:27:20,949 --> 01:27:23,576
Life is for living. Answer the phone.

1380
01:27:24,911 --> 01:27:26,412
-Charlie?
-<i>Francesca!</i>

1381
01:27:26,496 --> 01:27:28,498
Where are you? I've gotta see you right now.

1382
01:27:30,166 --> 01:27:32,085
In the hospital with my aunt.

1383
01:27:33,294 --> 01:27:34,128
Perfect.

1384
01:27:35,380 --> 01:27:36,339
I'm on my way.

1385
01:27:43,138 --> 01:27:46,141
That's it. You're doing it! Oh, my God!

1386
01:27:47,267 --> 01:27:50,603
I can't believe it! I can't believe it, Stanley! You're walking!

1387
01:27:50,687 --> 01:27:52,021
Oh, sit down, Stanley.

1388
01:27:56,359 --> 01:27:57,360
All right.

1389
01:28:00,780 --> 01:28:02,323
You gotta be kidding.

1390
01:28:06,786 --> 01:28:07,871
God help me.

1391
01:28:20,133 --> 01:28:22,594
-Charlie! Oh, my God.
-Okay.

1392
01:28:22,677 --> 01:28:25,013
-Okay. Right.
-What--? What happened?

1393
01:28:25,096 --> 01:28:26,473
A beautiful baby.

1394
01:28:26,556 --> 01:28:29,809
-God. So beautiful.
-Here. Have some water.

1395
01:28:31,019 --> 01:28:34,189
-That's too refreshing. Yeah.
-Okay, sorry.

1396
01:28:34,272 --> 01:28:35,899
-Is this Sylvia?
-Charlie.

1397
01:28:35,982 --> 01:28:38,026
-How you doing?
-I've been better.

1398
01:28:40,320 --> 01:28:42,030
You said you wanted to see me.

1399
01:28:42,113 --> 01:28:43,698
Yeah, God.

1400
01:28:43,781 --> 01:28:45,617
Why do you gotta be so lovely?

1401
01:28:45,700 --> 01:28:48,244
-You're pretty cute, yourself. Hey.
-That's not helping.

1402
01:28:49,412 --> 01:28:51,873
-Do you wanna go somewhere more private?
-No, this is good.

1403
01:28:53,458 --> 01:28:54,459
All right.

1404
01:28:55,752 --> 01:28:56,628
Francesca...

1405
01:28:59,506 --> 01:29:02,175
-Okay, okay. Here. Here you go.
-Thanks.

1406
01:29:03,551 --> 01:29:04,511
I can't...

1407
01:29:07,180 --> 01:29:09,098
I can't drive with the radio on,

1408
01:29:09,182 --> 01:29:14,646
in case anything by The Pointer Sisters comes on
and I swerve into a ditch.

1409
01:29:14,729 --> 01:29:20,193
I can't walk along any beach
where there might be frolicking seals.

1410
01:29:20,276 --> 01:29:22,779
I can't eat kettle corn. I can't boogie board.

1411
01:29:22,862 --> 01:29:26,825
I can't swim in any body of water
that is higher than my chest,

1412
01:29:26,908 --> 01:29:30,829
especially if there's some guy playing
with his gorgeous golden retriever.

1413
01:29:30,912 --> 01:29:33,248
I can't barbeque unsupervised.

1414
01:29:33,331 --> 01:29:35,458
I probably can't go to the Grand Canyon,

1415
01:29:35,542 --> 01:29:39,295
just based on the pictures I've seen
because it's too breathtakingly beautiful.

1416
01:29:42,215 --> 01:29:43,842
I would like to have kids.

1417
01:29:46,261 --> 01:29:51,558
But they will either have to be boring or spoiled
because cute and adorable--

1418
01:29:51,641 --> 01:29:52,559
Charlie.

1419
01:29:54,102 --> 01:29:56,271
We'll adopt the worst kids we can find.

1420
01:30:08,241 --> 01:30:09,576
Oh, kiss, goddamn it!