1 00:00:09,844 --> 00:00:11,428 BRETT: (SIGHS) Well, that was horrible. 2 00:00:12,597 --> 00:00:14,681 Yeah, some of the things that I said in there, 3 00:00:14,766 --> 00:00:17,893 I didn't... It was like they just came out. 4 00:00:18,436 --> 00:00:19,436 No, it's... 5 00:00:19,479 --> 00:00:20,562 I didn't mean... 6 00:00:20,646 --> 00:00:22,439 I did the same thing. I think that's therapy. 7 00:00:22,482 --> 00:00:23,482 I think you just kind of... 8 00:00:23,816 --> 00:00:25,067 (CAR BEEPS) 9 00:00:25,777 --> 00:00:27,944 How are we supposed to do this every weekend? 10 00:00:28,488 --> 00:00:30,572 I... I don't know. 11 00:00:33,534 --> 00:00:34,826 (BRETT SIGHS) 12 00:00:41,250 --> 00:00:43,043 I don't know what to do with myself. 13 00:00:43,127 --> 00:00:44,169 Where... 14 00:00:45,880 --> 00:00:49,841 Where do you go after World War III emotional bombing? 15 00:00:52,553 --> 00:00:55,764 Is there any way that we could just, 16 00:00:55,848 --> 00:00:57,057 like, let it go? 17 00:00:57,517 --> 00:01:00,727 Just move on with the day. 18 00:01:01,521 --> 00:01:03,480 -We have the babysitter. -Yeah. 19 00:01:03,606 --> 00:01:06,733 -Just... Wildest dreams... -Okay, I like this. 20 00:01:06,859 --> 00:01:11,029 -(STAMMERS) If you were to follow your bliss. -Mmm-hmm. 21 00:01:11,572 --> 00:01:12,864 What would you do? 22 00:01:13,491 --> 00:01:14,491 Anything. 23 00:01:14,534 --> 00:01:16,159 -Anything in the whole world? -Anything. 24 00:01:17,245 --> 00:01:18,870 (EXHALES DEEPLY) 25 00:01:22,250 --> 00:01:23,291 Barnes and Noble, 26 00:01:24,919 --> 00:01:27,129 third floor, green leather chair. 27 00:01:27,880 --> 00:01:30,590 I would get a peppermint tea. 28 00:01:30,675 --> 00:01:32,551 I would get an original copy of Dune, 29 00:01:32,635 --> 00:01:34,052 and nobody would know where to find me, 30 00:01:34,137 --> 00:01:35,387 and I'd be all by myself. 31 00:01:36,222 --> 00:01:37,222 And just... 32 00:01:38,975 --> 00:01:40,892 (EXHALES DEEPLY) 33 00:01:41,936 --> 00:01:43,270 Your dream 34 00:01:43,813 --> 00:01:47,732 is to go to Barnes and Noble by yourself? 35 00:01:48,609 --> 00:01:49,609 That's your dream? 36 00:01:49,694 --> 00:01:50,861 It was the first thing that popped into my head. 37 00:01:50,903 --> 00:01:52,904 It's just, like, a solace thing. It's comfortable for me. 38 00:01:52,947 --> 00:01:56,491 -I don't know. -Okay, I guess what I was thinking, um, 39 00:01:56,576 --> 00:02:00,078 was more like... (STAMMERS) 40 00:02:00,163 --> 00:02:02,914 A couple thing. Like, something for us together. 41 00:02:03,499 --> 00:02:04,499 Right, yeah. 42 00:02:04,584 --> 00:02:06,209 -So in that kind of place. -No, yeah, yeah. 43 00:02:06,252 --> 00:02:08,086 You're right, I'm sorry. That was... Yes, of course. 44 00:02:08,129 --> 00:02:10,255 Like, that wasn't fun, but this will be... 45 00:02:10,381 --> 00:02:11,464 -This will be fun. -So fun. 46 00:02:11,549 --> 00:02:13,341 I'm not sure I can generate that. 47 00:02:13,718 --> 00:02:15,010 -You know what I mean? -Yeah. 48 00:02:15,136 --> 00:02:17,220 But if you got something, I could probably, like, 49 00:02:17,263 --> 00:02:19,764 get on your wagon and, like... 50 00:02:20,558 --> 00:02:21,600 -What just happened? -Oh. 51 00:02:21,684 --> 00:02:23,768 -What happened? -Uh, something amazing. 52 00:02:24,103 --> 00:02:25,604 -What? -Kickball. 53 00:02:28,107 --> 00:02:29,274 -Okay. -Yeah. 54 00:02:29,859 --> 00:02:31,735 Oh, my god. No... No kids. 55 00:02:31,777 --> 00:02:33,153 I'm gonna text everyone 56 00:02:33,613 --> 00:02:35,280 and I'm gonna say, "No kids." 57 00:02:35,448 --> 00:02:36,865 -Um... -So you're talking like a... 58 00:02:36,949 --> 00:02:39,951 Like... Like how we used to just, like, play kickball. 59 00:02:39,994 --> 00:02:41,161 -Okay. -Oh, God. 60 00:02:41,287 --> 00:02:44,372 And just, like, drink beer and be in the park. 61 00:02:44,540 --> 00:02:47,083 The idea of a party with a lot of people, 62 00:02:47,126 --> 00:02:49,461 it makes me just a little anxious, just because of like... 63 00:02:49,921 --> 00:02:51,213 Where we're coming from... 64 00:02:51,297 --> 00:02:53,298 I get it. I just wonder if there's any way 65 00:02:53,341 --> 00:02:57,385 that we cannot, like, talk it to death before it... 66 00:02:57,470 --> 00:02:58,887 You're right. You're right. Say no more. 67 00:02:59,013 --> 00:03:00,764 -What if it's just fun? -I hear you. 68 00:03:00,806 --> 00:03:03,475 -We're... That's over. We're going to kickball. -Yeah. 69 00:03:05,478 --> 00:03:06,937 -(LAUGHS) -Okay, all right. 70 00:03:10,483 --> 00:03:14,069 MICHELLE: Yes. Okay, you go get a ball, get some cones. 71 00:03:14,195 --> 00:03:15,403 I'm gonna hold the field down. 72 00:03:15,947 --> 00:03:16,988 -Um... -Roger roger. 73 00:03:17,323 --> 00:03:18,490 -See you soon. -Okay. 74 00:03:24,914 --> 00:03:26,998 (CHILDREN PLAYING) 75 00:03:33,172 --> 00:03:34,881 (CELL PHONE RINGING) 76 00:03:39,971 --> 00:03:41,346 (CONTINUES RINGING) 77 00:03:45,351 --> 00:03:47,852 Uh-oh! (SCATTING NONSENSICALLY) 78 00:03:48,104 --> 00:03:49,813 Hey, Alex, I got a situation, man. 79 00:03:50,398 --> 00:03:51,690 Uh-oh. 80 00:03:52,275 --> 00:03:53,275 What's going on? 81 00:03:53,359 --> 00:03:55,819 It's kind of a long story, but can you do me a huge favor? 82 00:03:56,070 --> 00:03:57,070 You busy? 83 00:03:57,154 --> 00:03:59,197 No, I'm just busy being Tina's bitch. What do you need? 84 00:03:59,615 --> 00:04:01,700 Okay, can you go to Big 5 85 00:04:01,784 --> 00:04:03,994 and get, like, a kickball and some cones 86 00:04:04,161 --> 00:04:06,788 -and maybe pick up some beer? -Of course. 87 00:04:07,039 --> 00:04:08,081 This would be huge for me. 88 00:04:08,165 --> 00:04:10,625 I need 20 minutes so I can just get myself into a better place. 89 00:04:11,252 --> 00:04:12,627 All right, consider it done. Love you, man. 90 00:04:12,920 --> 00:04:14,212 Love you too, bud. Thanks. 91 00:04:14,338 --> 00:04:15,338 You got it. 92 00:04:17,591 --> 00:04:19,259 (EXHALES DEEPLY) 93 00:04:20,386 --> 00:04:22,012 (CROWD CHATTERING) 94 00:04:24,265 --> 00:04:25,849 (CELL PHONE BEEPS) 95 00:04:44,410 --> 00:04:45,577 -Hi. -Hi! 96 00:04:45,661 --> 00:04:47,412 -How's it going? -Good. Good. 97 00:04:47,496 --> 00:04:49,497 I'm so sorry. Um... 98 00:04:50,041 --> 00:04:52,792 I'm, uh, kind of reserving the field. 99 00:04:53,461 --> 00:04:54,794 Oh, you did? 100 00:04:54,962 --> 00:04:56,171 Yeah. 101 00:04:56,881 --> 00:04:58,256 (STAMMERS) I am 102 00:04:59,008 --> 00:05:00,133 in this moment. 103 00:05:00,217 --> 00:05:01,843 So you, like, made a reservation? 104 00:05:02,386 --> 00:05:04,429 I mean, not, like, officially, 105 00:05:04,472 --> 00:05:07,640 but I'm... You know, I've been here, like, holding down the fort 106 00:05:07,767 --> 00:05:10,685 -and just waiting for people to... -Right. No, I hear you. Um... 107 00:05:10,770 --> 00:05:13,772 We actually reserved this field a while back 108 00:05:13,856 --> 00:05:16,024 for my friend Sailor's birthday. 109 00:05:16,734 --> 00:05:19,277 Yeah, we're playing kick the can, so... 110 00:05:19,779 --> 00:05:20,779 (SIGHS) 111 00:05:20,863 --> 00:05:21,863 Okay. 112 00:05:22,239 --> 00:05:23,615 We are playing kickball. 113 00:05:24,283 --> 00:05:29,287 So we need, like, the bases and the whole official field 114 00:05:29,372 --> 00:05:30,955 that you guys don't need. 115 00:05:31,415 --> 00:05:34,250 So is there some kind of compromise 116 00:05:34,293 --> 00:05:37,087 where, like, we could have this bit and you could have that. 117 00:05:37,588 --> 00:05:40,173 And it's just kind of important to me. 118 00:05:40,257 --> 00:05:42,133 -I have so many people coming... -Uh... 119 00:05:42,218 --> 00:05:44,636 -I've organized this whole thing now. -Right. 120 00:05:45,596 --> 00:05:48,640 Sorry, I don't... I don't really know what to tell you. 121 00:05:49,266 --> 00:05:52,811 But good luck. Good luck and we're gonna need the whole field, so... 122 00:05:53,020 --> 00:05:54,145 Thank you. 123 00:05:58,442 --> 00:05:59,734 This is cool over here. 124 00:06:00,152 --> 00:06:01,861 I can see why people are starting to migrate east. 125 00:06:02,488 --> 00:06:04,823 They just live here because they can't afford to live where you live. 126 00:06:05,491 --> 00:06:07,325 You prefer it in the hills. 127 00:06:07,660 --> 00:06:10,161 It's just so dead over here. Nobody goes out. 128 00:06:10,538 --> 00:06:12,455 Maybe you should come over more often. 129 00:06:13,416 --> 00:06:15,583 I slept over almost every night this week. 130 00:06:15,751 --> 00:06:17,502 Well, Sally loves it when you sleep over. 131 00:06:17,837 --> 00:06:19,337 -Oh, do you? Oh! -(BOTH LAUGH) 132 00:06:21,549 --> 00:06:23,925 LARRY: She loves a good nose. TINA: Is that my brother-in-law? 133 00:06:24,427 --> 00:06:25,552 What is he doing? 134 00:06:26,303 --> 00:06:27,679 I'll meet you up at the field, okay? 135 00:06:27,763 --> 00:06:28,847 Okay. 136 00:06:29,765 --> 00:06:32,976 Come on, Sally. Let's go break some hearts. 137 00:06:34,103 --> 00:06:36,813 (WALKING IN MEMPHIS PLAYING ON RADIO) 138 00:06:38,899 --> 00:06:40,066 (GRUNTS) 139 00:06:40,151 --> 00:06:42,026 Fuck! Jesus, Tina. 140 00:06:42,445 --> 00:06:43,862 -Thank you for that. -(LAUGHS) What's up, weirdo? 141 00:06:43,946 --> 00:06:46,364 That was really, really, really awesome. Thank you. 142 00:06:46,866 --> 00:06:48,241 All right, grumpy pants. 143 00:06:48,576 --> 00:06:50,410 -Are you coming? -Yes, I'm coming. 144 00:06:50,494 --> 00:06:51,703 -I'll be there in a second. -Let's go. 145 00:06:51,787 --> 00:06:52,829 (CAR BEEPING) 146 00:06:52,872 --> 00:06:55,540 Wait, hold on. I'm not ready. I'm taking... I just need like a second. 147 00:06:56,500 --> 00:06:57,500 Don't do this. 148 00:06:58,210 --> 00:06:59,627 Don't do what? What are you... 149 00:06:59,837 --> 00:07:01,671 This whole mood-killer thing. 150 00:07:01,714 --> 00:07:04,591 She's so fucking psyched and she really needs this day 151 00:07:04,675 --> 00:07:06,926 and she really needs to party and have fun. 152 00:07:07,052 --> 00:07:08,636 -I... -And if you're going to be like this, 153 00:07:08,721 --> 00:07:10,221 it's gonna ruin it for her. 154 00:07:10,264 --> 00:07:14,601 Okay, I am trying to get myself ready for that, 155 00:07:14,685 --> 00:07:17,187 but it's a little hard for me, okay? You understand that? 156 00:07:17,396 --> 00:07:20,106 Yeah, I mean, I do. But just fake it. (CHUCKLES) 157 00:07:21,066 --> 00:07:22,650 I mean, do you see this smile? 158 00:07:23,652 --> 00:07:24,777 -Yeah. -I'm dead inside. 159 00:07:25,738 --> 00:07:27,822 -Really? -I mean, this isn't really how I wanna spend 160 00:07:27,907 --> 00:07:31,659 my day, but I am so fucking psyched to spend it this way! 161 00:07:32,328 --> 00:07:33,453 -Okay. -How about a smile? 162 00:07:34,830 --> 00:07:36,289 (SIGHS) 163 00:07:37,333 --> 00:07:40,376 Okay, do you... Is there any way we can get some alcohol? 164 00:07:40,628 --> 00:07:41,753 -I've got some coming. -Okay. 165 00:07:42,379 --> 00:07:43,379 See you up there. 166 00:07:45,424 --> 00:07:46,424 I got the stuff. 167 00:07:46,509 --> 00:07:47,884 -Did you get beer? -Yeah. 168 00:07:48,469 --> 00:07:49,719 I... No, give me... I need one. 169 00:07:49,762 --> 00:07:51,679 -Oh, oh, yeah. -Thank you. 170 00:07:52,056 --> 00:07:53,056 (OPENS CAN) 171 00:07:54,517 --> 00:07:56,851 (GULPING) 172 00:07:59,146 --> 00:08:00,271 Whoa. 173 00:08:01,065 --> 00:08:04,817 PHOEBE: Look, how long can this ridiculous game of kick the can last, anyway? 174 00:08:05,110 --> 00:08:06,277 Hours. 175 00:08:06,654 --> 00:08:08,238 That's what they told me, hours. 176 00:08:08,906 --> 00:08:12,617 -(WHISPERING) -Yeah, I'll take a stab at it. 177 00:08:12,826 --> 00:08:14,202 PHOEBE: Honey, we'll work it out. It'll be fine. 178 00:08:14,286 --> 00:08:15,745 -JENNY: What do you do for hours? -Oh. 179 00:08:15,788 --> 00:08:17,372 They're not gonna play for hours. 180 00:08:17,706 --> 00:08:19,123 -Hey. -Hi! 181 00:08:19,208 --> 00:08:21,709 WOMAN: Hey, guys! (LAUGHING) How are you? 182 00:08:22,002 --> 00:08:23,628 Yo, what's happening, ballers? 183 00:08:24,380 --> 00:08:26,464 -ALL: Yay! -All right. 184 00:08:28,801 --> 00:08:31,636 Excuse me, do you guys like movies? 185 00:08:32,680 --> 00:08:35,348 -Mmm-hmm. -'Cause I got $200 on this gift card 186 00:08:35,432 --> 00:08:36,933 for the ArcLight movie theater. 187 00:08:37,309 --> 00:08:39,477 How about you guys catch a flick, 188 00:08:40,062 --> 00:08:42,146 order as many concessions as you want, 189 00:08:42,189 --> 00:08:44,148 and then everybody wins. What do you say? 190 00:08:44,692 --> 00:08:45,817 I think we're good. 191 00:08:46,318 --> 00:08:49,028 Okay, okay, okay, how about this? 192 00:08:49,154 --> 00:08:51,114 How about Jamba Juice? 193 00:08:51,407 --> 00:08:52,490 Good for a full year. 194 00:08:54,285 --> 00:08:57,078 Okay, okay, Starbucks. 195 00:08:57,329 --> 00:08:59,289 There's plenty of life left in this one. 196 00:09:00,124 --> 00:09:01,165 You got a lot of gift cards. 197 00:09:02,751 --> 00:09:05,378 Listen, uh, they're playing hardball. 198 00:09:06,171 --> 00:09:08,172 TINA: Oh, do you remember Brett and Alex? 199 00:09:08,507 --> 00:09:10,300 -Of course. Hey, Alex. -Hi, Larry. 200 00:09:10,843 --> 00:09:12,427 Hi, sir. I worked on your show. Nice to see you. 201 00:09:12,511 --> 00:09:13,511 -Oh, no kidding. -Yeah. 202 00:09:14,013 --> 00:09:16,055 So, Larry, what's the, uh, situation? 203 00:09:16,390 --> 00:09:17,849 Well, it's a little complicated, 204 00:09:17,933 --> 00:09:19,434 but I think I can get them in the boat. 205 00:09:20,227 --> 00:09:21,311 Excuse me, young lady? 206 00:09:21,645 --> 00:09:23,146 Can I talk to you again just for one second? 207 00:09:23,731 --> 00:09:26,190 (MUTTERING) 208 00:09:27,526 --> 00:09:28,568 Name your price. 209 00:09:29,361 --> 00:09:31,863 I got about $500 right here. It's yours. What do you say? 210 00:09:32,698 --> 00:09:36,034 No, thanks. But if you guys could clear off the bleachers 211 00:09:36,118 --> 00:09:39,203 'cause that's also our space, and maybe go away. 212 00:09:39,538 --> 00:09:41,789 Actually, uh, please forgive Daddy Warbucks here. 213 00:09:41,874 --> 00:09:43,958 He's from a far-off land called West Hollywood. 214 00:09:44,043 --> 00:09:45,209 They have a different set of rules. 215 00:09:45,252 --> 00:09:46,502 I'm very sorry about that. 216 00:09:47,129 --> 00:09:49,714 Here's the deal. Could we possibly compromise? 217 00:09:50,007 --> 00:09:53,718 Like, you guys use the field for an hour, and then we get a turn. 218 00:09:53,761 --> 00:09:55,178 Doesn't that make everyone happy? 219 00:09:55,387 --> 00:09:58,139 No! How many times do I have to say no to you people? 220 00:09:58,223 --> 00:10:00,558 Like, it is my friend's birthday 221 00:10:00,601 --> 00:10:02,560 and you need to respect that. 222 00:10:03,395 --> 00:10:05,938 I can't, I can't. You know, this is like... 223 00:10:06,023 --> 00:10:07,148 (MUTTERING) 224 00:10:07,232 --> 00:10:09,317 -How about we go for sushi? -MAN: Yep. 225 00:10:09,443 --> 00:10:10,652 Lots of ways to have fun. 226 00:10:10,903 --> 00:10:12,487 -We can figure it out. Yeah. -PHOEBE: We can drink more. 227 00:10:12,613 --> 00:10:13,655 Look at these trees! 228 00:10:13,739 --> 00:10:14,906 JENNY: Dude, I'm kind of feeling the brunch vibe. 229 00:10:23,874 --> 00:10:24,957 We want to play you. 230 00:10:25,084 --> 00:10:26,584 Can you get the fuck off the field? 231 00:10:30,798 --> 00:10:32,090 GIRL: Hey! 232 00:10:32,466 --> 00:10:33,716 ALEX: All right. PHOEBE: Here we go. 233 00:10:33,759 --> 00:10:36,010 You did not just do that. 234 00:10:36,387 --> 00:10:38,096 Here's the thing. We're not leaving. 235 00:10:38,514 --> 00:10:39,931 So either you let us play you, 236 00:10:40,391 --> 00:10:42,767 or we're going to be all up in your shit all day. 237 00:10:43,143 --> 00:10:45,103 -All day. -It's your choice. Whatever you want. 238 00:10:49,274 --> 00:10:51,776 Fine. Fine! You want to play us, lady? 239 00:10:51,944 --> 00:10:53,528 Fine. Get ready. 240 00:10:54,279 --> 00:10:55,321 You get ready. 241 00:10:55,447 --> 00:10:58,616 You get ready to get your asses kicked by a bunch of old people. 242 00:10:58,659 --> 00:10:59,867 (ALL LAUGHING) 243 00:10:59,952 --> 00:11:02,120 -Okay. -Mmm-hmm. Get ready. 244 00:11:02,246 --> 00:11:03,830 -MAN: Ready! -Thank you so much. 245 00:11:04,873 --> 00:11:06,457 (LAUGHING) 246 00:11:06,834 --> 00:11:09,836 Youngsters, before there were smart phones and electric cars, 247 00:11:10,129 --> 00:11:13,005 there was shotgunning beer. It's really simple. 248 00:11:13,257 --> 00:11:16,259 Take your beer, you're gonna puncture it at the bottom, 249 00:11:16,552 --> 00:11:18,553 you put your finger on it, put it up to your mouth, 250 00:11:18,637 --> 00:11:20,471 -crack it open... -Okay, okay. 251 00:11:20,514 --> 00:11:22,181 ALL: Whoo! 252 00:11:22,307 --> 00:11:24,267 I'm just gonna show everyone how to do this. 253 00:11:25,310 --> 00:11:26,769 (HISSING) 254 00:11:27,312 --> 00:11:28,938 TINA: Yeah! Whoo! 255 00:11:28,981 --> 00:11:29,981 (ALL CHEERING) 256 00:11:32,276 --> 00:11:36,654 WOMAN: Go, go, go! Drink, drink, drink! 257 00:11:36,780 --> 00:11:39,782 -GIRL: Okay, okay. Listen up, everyone. -Oh. 258 00:11:39,825 --> 00:11:42,660 The object of this game is for someone from your team... 259 00:11:42,786 --> 00:11:43,995 -Uh... -(BELCHES LOUDLY) 260 00:11:44,663 --> 00:11:46,622 Please... To kick this can 261 00:11:47,416 --> 00:11:49,167 after the game starts. 262 00:11:49,501 --> 00:11:51,002 -Okay. -GIRL: Oh, okay? 263 00:11:51,128 --> 00:11:52,170 Got it. 264 00:11:52,337 --> 00:11:55,882 You have to kick it before someone from our team captures you. 265 00:11:55,966 --> 00:11:58,760 If you are caught, you will be put in jail. 266 00:11:59,511 --> 00:12:02,013 If we catch all of you before you kick this can, 267 00:12:02,264 --> 00:12:03,264 we win. 268 00:12:03,557 --> 00:12:06,684 If any one of you kicks the can, you win. 269 00:12:07,352 --> 00:12:08,728 -Is that clear? -MICHELLE: Yep. 270 00:12:09,855 --> 00:12:11,189 Okay, you have one minute to hide. 271 00:12:11,648 --> 00:12:13,024 BRETT: Now? GIRL: Yeah, now! 272 00:12:13,108 --> 00:12:14,484 WOMAN: Oh, shit. GIRL: Move it. 273 00:12:14,526 --> 00:12:15,860 (WOMAN SQUEALS) 274 00:12:15,944 --> 00:12:17,361 BRETT: Wait, wait, where you going? 275 00:12:17,821 --> 00:12:19,197 GIRL: Hope their knees don't give out. 276 00:12:21,533 --> 00:12:22,867 This could be fun. 277 00:12:24,703 --> 00:12:27,371 (CHILDREN LAUGHING PLAYFULLY) 278 00:12:33,837 --> 00:12:35,379 All right, they're playing tight to the can, 279 00:12:35,422 --> 00:12:37,590 so I think we should hold here before we make any moves. 280 00:12:38,217 --> 00:12:39,383 We're safe for now. 281 00:12:40,219 --> 00:12:41,552 Want to hear the greatest sound in the world? 282 00:12:41,970 --> 00:12:43,387 -(OPENS CAN) -Oh! 283 00:12:43,430 --> 00:12:44,555 Shh! 284 00:12:45,224 --> 00:12:46,224 Sorry. 285 00:12:47,059 --> 00:12:48,142 What was that all about? 286 00:12:48,227 --> 00:12:49,227 What was what about? 287 00:12:52,731 --> 00:12:55,024 Larry is the kind of producer who can make your career. 288 00:12:55,567 --> 00:12:57,777 -(BELCHES) -So you might not want to cut his balls off 289 00:12:57,861 --> 00:12:59,821 in front of fucking hipster chick. 290 00:13:00,113 --> 00:13:01,197 I didn't cut his balls off. 291 00:13:02,449 --> 00:13:04,492 When he offered the money, you were all... 292 00:13:04,743 --> 00:13:06,702 I thought it was a little weird that he offered money, 293 00:13:06,745 --> 00:13:08,287 but I don't think I was rude about it. 294 00:13:09,248 --> 00:13:10,248 Okay. 295 00:13:10,415 --> 00:13:11,415 (CHUCKLES) 296 00:13:14,253 --> 00:13:15,920 -I like Larry. -Okay. 297 00:13:15,963 --> 00:13:18,089 I mean, he's... I have no issue with him. 298 00:13:18,131 --> 00:13:19,131 Okay. 299 00:13:20,843 --> 00:13:21,843 What? 300 00:13:22,886 --> 00:13:23,886 Okay. 301 00:13:26,598 --> 00:13:28,850 Do you think I'm jealous of Larry? 302 00:13:29,810 --> 00:13:32,353 Let me tell you something. Larry is jealous of me. 303 00:13:32,729 --> 00:13:33,771 Look at this shit. 304 00:13:34,773 --> 00:13:36,274 You taking this in right now? 305 00:13:36,900 --> 00:13:39,360 Look at this. Ten pounds lighter already. (SNAPS FINGERS) 306 00:13:39,444 --> 00:13:40,611 -Like that. -Mmm-hmm. 307 00:13:40,946 --> 00:13:42,905 I'm not jealous, if that's what you're getting at. 308 00:13:43,282 --> 00:13:44,282 Okay. 309 00:13:46,618 --> 00:13:48,369 He's a little creepy with his dog, though. 310 00:13:49,121 --> 00:13:51,247 He's kind of like an old James Bond villain. 311 00:13:51,290 --> 00:13:53,040 -Stop, stop. -He's got the little white dog. 312 00:13:53,125 --> 00:13:54,125 Fuck you, stop. 313 00:13:54,167 --> 00:13:56,419 He's just like, "Nyah nyah... 314 00:13:56,461 --> 00:13:58,754 -(LAUGHS) -"Nyah nyah." 315 00:13:59,298 --> 00:14:01,132 -(ALEX LAUGHING) -Shh! 316 00:14:02,050 --> 00:14:03,467 -Shh! -You're gonna blow our cover. 317 00:14:03,552 --> 00:14:05,553 Give me a beer. Give me a beer. Thank you, thank you. 318 00:14:05,637 --> 00:14:07,889 I'll take a beer as well, but you guys should really keep it down. 319 00:14:07,973 --> 00:14:09,974 Now I'm kicking you out. Get out, this is our spot. 320 00:14:10,017 --> 00:14:11,934 -This is our spot. -Bitches, we were fucking here first. 321 00:14:11,977 --> 00:14:14,312 -We're not all going to fit in here. -Tina even urinated right here. 322 00:14:14,479 --> 00:14:16,147 -It's our territory. -That's so gross. 323 00:14:16,315 --> 00:14:18,024 -You're making too much noise. -ALEX: Okay. 324 00:14:18,150 --> 00:14:20,151 -(PHOEBE SCREAMING) -(GASPS) Oh, no! 325 00:14:20,819 --> 00:14:21,944 (PHOEBE SCREAMING) 326 00:14:22,154 --> 00:14:24,697 (LAUGHS) 327 00:14:24,823 --> 00:14:26,616 -GIRL: Jail time. -(PHOEBE GRUNTS) 328 00:14:27,200 --> 00:14:28,409 -Who? -BRETT: What happened? 329 00:14:28,493 --> 00:14:30,745 -Phoebe. -We're dropping like flies. 330 00:14:30,871 --> 00:14:31,871 Yeah. 331 00:14:32,122 --> 00:14:33,247 One for my homie. 332 00:14:33,457 --> 00:14:34,498 -(SPILLS BEER) -(ALL LAUGHING) 333 00:14:35,667 --> 00:14:37,335 -Okay, let's mobilize. -BRETT: Get out of here. 334 00:14:37,377 --> 00:14:38,836 -We gotta keep moving to stay alive... -Okay. 335 00:14:38,879 --> 00:14:39,879 -Okay. -MICHELLE: Okay. 336 00:14:39,963 --> 00:14:40,963 Hide. 337 00:14:41,006 --> 00:14:42,006 -MICHELLE: Good luck. -Good luck. 338 00:14:44,384 --> 00:14:45,343 (SQUEALS) 339 00:14:45,719 --> 00:14:46,761 How you doing today, lady? 340 00:14:47,846 --> 00:14:49,221 -(SIGHS) I'm good. -Mmm-hmm. 341 00:14:49,556 --> 00:14:51,015 This is weird and fun. 342 00:14:51,183 --> 00:14:53,184 -Can I tell you something? You're amazing. -Mmm-hmm. 343 00:14:53,602 --> 00:14:55,311 -Oh. -You are. You're incredible. 344 00:14:55,354 --> 00:14:57,146 -You're amazing. -No, the fact that you came 345 00:14:57,397 --> 00:15:00,441 and resurrected yourself out of that fucking therapy situation 346 00:15:00,817 --> 00:15:03,569 -and are blasting out having this fun day... -Yeah. 347 00:15:03,654 --> 00:15:04,654 You're, like, my hero. 348 00:15:04,696 --> 00:15:06,364 -(LAUGHS) -Yeah, seriously. 349 00:15:06,448 --> 00:15:07,907 You're doing it, too. Look at you. 350 00:15:07,991 --> 00:15:09,492 -Oh, I am... -Drinking and having fun and... 351 00:15:09,618 --> 00:15:10,701 -This? -So awesome. 352 00:15:10,786 --> 00:15:12,495 I am faking this whole thing. 353 00:15:13,080 --> 00:15:15,539 I feel like I'm carrying the dead bodies 354 00:15:15,624 --> 00:15:18,793 of Michelle and Brett on my shoulders all day. 355 00:15:19,044 --> 00:15:21,671 -I'm, like, trying to dig myself out... -Yeah. 356 00:15:21,880 --> 00:15:24,048 ...of the womb of despair, and you're just, like... 357 00:15:25,008 --> 00:15:26,425 How the fuck do you do it? 358 00:15:27,219 --> 00:15:30,096 Just... Just do it. Just have fun, you know? 359 00:15:30,180 --> 00:15:32,932 I'm doing it, but I feel awful. 360 00:15:33,183 --> 00:15:34,725 -But I'm fuckin'... I'm trying. -Okay. 361 00:15:34,893 --> 00:15:36,769 -I'm trying. -I see that you're trying. 362 00:15:36,853 --> 00:15:37,937 -I'm trying. -I appreciate it. 363 00:15:38,021 --> 00:15:41,315 But, you know, this feels like the thing where... 364 00:15:43,527 --> 00:15:45,736 (SIGHS) The thing from therapy. I don't even want... 365 00:15:45,821 --> 00:15:47,279 I don't want to talk about what we talked about... 366 00:15:47,364 --> 00:15:49,031 Why? Why not? Why don't you want to talk about it? 367 00:15:49,074 --> 00:15:51,409 It's part of our day. It's a real thing. I can't just ignore it. 368 00:15:51,493 --> 00:15:53,619 It was part of our day. We're not ignoring it. 369 00:15:53,704 --> 00:15:56,580 We went to therapy. We had that time set aside 370 00:15:56,790 --> 00:15:58,249 to talk about our problems. 371 00:15:58,458 --> 00:16:00,084 We talked about it more in the car. 372 00:16:00,419 --> 00:16:02,003 We got very, very sad. 373 00:16:02,462 --> 00:16:05,297 And then we decided, "Let's have a fun day. 374 00:16:05,382 --> 00:16:07,049 "Let's make the rest of the day fun." 375 00:16:07,092 --> 00:16:08,676 -Kick the can! -Yeah. 376 00:16:08,802 --> 00:16:10,761 I'm doing it! What else do you expect? 377 00:16:10,846 --> 00:16:13,347 I want you to have fun. I wanna have fun with you. 378 00:16:13,432 --> 00:16:14,473 I can't. 379 00:16:15,100 --> 00:16:16,642 -"You can't"? -I can try. 380 00:16:16,768 --> 00:16:19,520 -That's all I can do. -I don't think you should have to try. 381 00:16:19,604 --> 00:16:21,856 I think it should be fun to hang out with your wife and your friends. 382 00:16:21,940 --> 00:16:25,276 Well, if I don't try, then I might as well, just, fucking 383 00:16:25,610 --> 00:16:27,737 be sitting at the Barnes and Noble. 384 00:16:27,779 --> 00:16:29,280 -Maybe, maybe. -You know? 385 00:16:30,741 --> 00:16:31,824 Maybe? 386 00:16:34,953 --> 00:16:35,953 (CHORTLES) 387 00:16:36,038 --> 00:16:38,372 -lf it's really hard. -Got it. 388 00:16:42,627 --> 00:16:44,545 -Okay. -(CAN RATTLES) 389 00:16:44,629 --> 00:16:45,629 All right. 390 00:16:46,048 --> 00:16:47,256 Oh, Brett. 391 00:16:48,050 --> 00:16:49,300 Brett. 392 00:16:50,635 --> 00:16:52,261 MAN: Oh, we... Oh, we got a walker. 393 00:16:52,471 --> 00:16:53,554 Hey, guard the can. Make sure he doesn't... 394 00:16:53,638 --> 00:16:55,681 BRETT: Turning myself in. MAN: What's up, kamikaze? 395 00:16:55,807 --> 00:16:56,974 It could be a decoy. Keep an eye out. 396 00:16:57,017 --> 00:16:58,017 BRETT: I'm just turning myself in. 397 00:16:58,101 --> 00:16:59,643 -You're good. You're good. -I got you. 398 00:16:59,686 --> 00:17:00,770 BRETT: Nope, thank you. 399 00:17:01,021 --> 00:17:02,646 -(ALEX LAUGHING) -Shh! 400 00:17:06,485 --> 00:17:08,402 TINA: I don't like this fucking place. It's gnarly. 401 00:17:08,570 --> 00:17:09,612 Look, look, look! 402 00:17:09,654 --> 00:17:10,988 Too small, too small. 403 00:17:12,824 --> 00:17:14,116 Oh, shit, come on! 404 00:17:14,326 --> 00:17:15,868 (SCREAMING) 405 00:17:16,828 --> 00:17:18,120 Get in there. 406 00:17:19,664 --> 00:17:20,956 (DOOR CLOSES) 407 00:17:22,167 --> 00:17:23,667 I know you're in here. 408 00:17:24,669 --> 00:17:26,170 (LAUGHS SOFTLY) 409 00:17:27,005 --> 00:17:28,005 (WHISPERS) Oh, my God. 410 00:17:33,970 --> 00:17:35,846 (LAUGHING) 411 00:17:36,098 --> 00:17:37,348 -(OPENS CAN) -(GASPS) 412 00:17:37,390 --> 00:17:38,849 Are you out of your mind? 413 00:17:38,934 --> 00:17:40,518 -(CHUCKLING) -(SHUSHING) 414 00:17:48,485 --> 00:17:49,652 No, no, no, no. 415 00:17:55,909 --> 00:17:57,451 She saw me. We're fucked. 416 00:18:00,789 --> 00:18:01,789 (DOOR RUSTLING) 417 00:18:15,303 --> 00:18:16,846 What a sucker. 418 00:18:17,556 --> 00:18:18,639 She's gone. 419 00:18:20,851 --> 00:18:21,892 What's wrong with you? 420 00:18:22,727 --> 00:18:24,019 You smell good. 421 00:18:24,104 --> 00:18:25,479 (LAUGHS) 422 00:18:26,064 --> 00:18:27,398 You're so drunk. 423 00:18:27,774 --> 00:18:29,024 -I am. -Okay, let's go. 424 00:18:29,067 --> 00:18:30,067 Okay. 425 00:18:42,497 --> 00:18:44,290 -(GASPS) -You are going to jail. 426 00:18:44,374 --> 00:18:45,624 No! I got you! 427 00:18:45,709 --> 00:18:46,709 TINA: Get off! 428 00:18:53,842 --> 00:18:55,301 (DOOR SLAMS OPEN) 429 00:18:59,139 --> 00:19:00,431 (DOOR SLAMS) 430 00:19:01,600 --> 00:19:03,017 (CHILDREN PLAYING) 431 00:19:04,102 --> 00:19:05,352 Hold on, hold on. 432 00:19:06,271 --> 00:19:07,271 Hold on. 433 00:19:07,355 --> 00:19:09,273 (VOMITING) 434 00:19:14,571 --> 00:19:15,571 I'm good. 435 00:19:24,873 --> 00:19:25,873 Whoa! 436 00:19:29,794 --> 00:19:32,213 You guys, I totally almost puked on one of them. 437 00:19:32,297 --> 00:19:33,380 (ALL LAUGHING) 438 00:19:43,225 --> 00:19:45,434 MAN: Yo, yo, yo! Outside, outside! Got it! 439 00:19:46,853 --> 00:19:48,938 -Shoot it! -I got it, I got it. 440 00:19:49,022 --> 00:19:50,189 Hold on, hold up. 441 00:19:50,690 --> 00:19:51,690 MAN: All right. 442 00:19:52,359 --> 00:19:53,359 MICHELLE: David. 443 00:19:56,071 --> 00:19:57,071 Hey, Michelle? 444 00:19:57,405 --> 00:19:58,489 Shh. 445 00:19:59,241 --> 00:20:00,241 I'm out! 446 00:20:00,325 --> 00:20:01,325 All right, here we go! 447 00:20:01,368 --> 00:20:02,368 -MICHELLE: Duck. -Huh? 448 00:20:02,661 --> 00:20:04,161 -Duck, dude! -Oh. 449 00:20:09,334 --> 00:20:11,043 Are you part of the kick-the-can game? 450 00:20:11,294 --> 00:20:13,629 Yes, I am. Do you know that game? 451 00:20:13,672 --> 00:20:15,839 I played it a thousand times growing up. 452 00:20:16,174 --> 00:20:17,341 Such a weird game. 453 00:20:19,177 --> 00:20:20,427 You guys are killing it, huh? 454 00:20:20,553 --> 00:20:23,847 Yeah. Listen, we're old, 455 00:20:24,641 --> 00:20:27,476 we're tired, we don't know this game. 456 00:20:27,811 --> 00:20:30,020 -But you're still alive. -I'm still alive, but... 457 00:20:30,689 --> 00:20:34,525 You know what? I think the best thing for me to do for my own honor 458 00:20:35,277 --> 00:20:36,527 is just turn myself in. 459 00:20:37,070 --> 00:20:38,696 -Why? -That's what I'm gonna do. 460 00:20:39,197 --> 00:20:43,284 Why? Because I wanted this day to be really fun... 461 00:20:43,702 --> 00:20:45,119 -Mmm-hmm. -And it's a disaster. 462 00:20:45,912 --> 00:20:47,496 I'm dragging the day out. 463 00:20:49,708 --> 00:20:50,749 You wanna win, don't you? 464 00:20:50,834 --> 00:20:51,875 I do wanna win. 465 00:20:51,918 --> 00:20:54,503 I wanna win more than I want anything in the world. 466 00:20:54,546 --> 00:20:55,963 -I want to win the game. -So get... 467 00:20:56,214 --> 00:20:57,548 You gotta go for it, then. 468 00:20:57,882 --> 00:21:00,342 Yeah, but look at their strategy. 469 00:21:01,136 --> 00:21:02,469 'Cause they caught everybody, 470 00:21:02,637 --> 00:21:04,972 so there's no point, like, to come looking for me. 471 00:21:05,348 --> 00:21:06,974 They're just hoarding the can. 472 00:21:07,517 --> 00:21:09,101 Yeah, got ya. 473 00:21:09,227 --> 00:21:11,020 Yeah. Like, how do I win? 474 00:21:11,313 --> 00:21:13,897 -I can't get past them all. -Okay, let's figure it out. 475 00:21:14,065 --> 00:21:15,065 It'll be fun. 476 00:21:17,986 --> 00:21:18,986 -Really? -Yeah. 477 00:21:19,070 --> 00:21:20,279 You don't have to go back to your game? 478 00:21:20,447 --> 00:21:21,447 Not at all. 479 00:21:24,075 --> 00:21:25,117 Okay. 480 00:21:26,161 --> 00:21:27,411 Here's one thing I was thinking, 481 00:21:27,495 --> 00:21:30,331 was maybe exploding my husband's car. 482 00:21:31,499 --> 00:21:32,791 -I like that. -Yeah. 483 00:21:33,626 --> 00:21:34,877 That's a good idea. 484 00:21:35,086 --> 00:21:36,503 Creating a distraction. 485 00:21:37,088 --> 00:21:38,672 Yeah, I wasn't even thinking about that. 486 00:21:38,757 --> 00:21:40,507 -'Cause then they'll just, you know... -What a good idea. 487 00:21:41,384 --> 00:21:43,093 -Yes, it's a distraction. -Yeah. 488 00:21:43,136 --> 00:21:45,054 -That's what we need. -Yeah, it's, it is. 489 00:21:45,472 --> 00:21:47,848 It's not going to take much to distract a bunch of hipsters. 490 00:21:48,266 --> 00:21:51,101 Just put on some Weezer or Grizzly Bear 491 00:21:51,186 --> 00:21:52,936 and they'll be distracted like that, you know? 492 00:21:53,021 --> 00:21:54,271 Look at you, so cool. 493 00:21:54,814 --> 00:21:55,981 Oh, I'm not cool. 494 00:21:56,107 --> 00:21:57,107 I'm, like, so uncool. 495 00:21:57,192 --> 00:21:58,901 But, you know, they'll just run off to a corner and, 496 00:21:58,943 --> 00:22:01,862 -like, you know, start, start doing their thing. -(LAUGHS) 497 00:22:01,946 --> 00:22:04,114 -And then, boom, you're right there. -No, you're not. Actually, I take it back. 498 00:22:04,157 --> 00:22:05,783 -You're not cool. -No, all right. 499 00:22:05,825 --> 00:22:07,076 Let's... Let's figure something out. 500 00:22:07,702 --> 00:22:08,702 Okay. 501 00:22:08,828 --> 00:22:11,455 What is there? What is there back there? 502 00:22:11,539 --> 00:22:14,375 What is... What is that? 503 00:22:18,755 --> 00:22:19,755 That's it. 504 00:22:20,840 --> 00:22:23,801 (ALL CHATTERING) 505 00:22:28,681 --> 00:22:29,681 How'd you get caught? 506 00:22:30,392 --> 00:22:31,517 I gave myself up. 507 00:22:32,102 --> 00:22:33,310 -Really? -Yup. 508 00:22:34,479 --> 00:22:36,730 You voluntarily put yourself in jail? 509 00:22:36,815 --> 00:22:37,940 I know what you're going to say. I know... 510 00:22:37,982 --> 00:22:39,191 You know, I'm not a big metaphor guy, 511 00:22:39,275 --> 00:22:41,652 but it seems like it might be a metaphor for your life right now. 512 00:22:41,736 --> 00:22:43,654 I got... I got it. I know it. 513 00:22:44,489 --> 00:22:47,157 Well, just to give you a little perspective, it could be worse. 514 00:22:47,951 --> 00:22:49,493 You could have just tried to make out with Tina. 515 00:22:51,121 --> 00:22:52,913 Really? How'd that go? 516 00:22:54,124 --> 00:22:55,165 Not good. 517 00:22:55,875 --> 00:22:56,875 Not good. 518 00:22:57,210 --> 00:22:58,252 Did it land? 519 00:22:58,628 --> 00:23:02,339 Uh, there was a crash landing and everyone died onboard. 520 00:23:02,507 --> 00:23:03,882 -Yeah. -Something like that. 521 00:23:03,967 --> 00:23:05,175 -(SPRINKLER HISSING) -Shit! What the... 522 00:23:05,385 --> 00:23:06,760 (ALL LAUGHING) 523 00:23:07,011 --> 00:23:09,179 Ho, ho, ho! Yeah! 524 00:23:09,848 --> 00:23:11,932 ALEX: Run for your lives! 525 00:23:12,392 --> 00:23:13,934 (INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC PLAYING)