1 00:00:42,463 --> 00:00:44,463 ("Radar Love" by Golden Earring playing) 2 00:01:02,796 --> 00:01:05,963 ♪ I've been drivin' all night, my hands wet on the wheel ♪ 3 00:01:07,755 --> 00:01:11,046 ♪ There's a voice in my head that drives my heel ♪ 4 00:01:12,630 --> 00:01:15,880 ♪ It's my baby callin', says, "I need you here" ♪ 5 00:01:17,338 --> 00:01:20,671 ♪ And it's a half past four and I'm shifting gear ♪ 6 00:01:22,671 --> 00:01:24,463 ♪ When she is lonely ♪ 7 00:01:24,546 --> 00:01:26,338 ♪ And the longing gets too much... ♪ 8 00:01:26,421 --> 00:01:28,171 DJ (over radio): There's your Golden Earring, 9 00:01:28,255 --> 00:01:30,380 and they're gonna be opening for The Who for three days 10 00:01:30,463 --> 00:01:32,005 at Madison Square Garden, starting... 11 00:01:32,088 --> 00:01:33,713 (radio shuts off) 12 00:01:41,713 --> 00:01:44,130 (typewriter keys clacking) 13 00:01:44,213 --> 00:01:45,630 (typewriter bell dings) 14 00:01:45,713 --> 00:01:47,588 (bird cawing) 15 00:01:53,671 --> 00:01:55,255 Is that Uncle Charlie? 16 00:01:55,338 --> 00:01:57,088 MAN: I was trying to fucking help you pitch. 17 00:01:57,171 --> 00:01:58,546 Help me pitch? 18 00:01:58,630 --> 00:02:00,463 This is batting practice, okay? 19 00:02:00,546 --> 00:02:02,380 It's not for you to help me pitch. 20 00:02:02,463 --> 00:02:04,088 I'm worried about you. 21 00:02:04,171 --> 00:02:06,088 (overlapping chatter) 22 00:02:06,171 --> 00:02:08,296 MAN: All right, shut the fuck up. 23 00:02:08,380 --> 00:02:10,046 CHARLIE: All right, all right, all right. Ready? 24 00:02:10,130 --> 00:02:11,380 MAN: Ah, this guy's got nothing. 25 00:02:11,463 --> 00:02:13,171 You got nothing. Come on, Chaz. 26 00:02:13,255 --> 00:02:15,921 -CHARLIE: All right, here we go. -MAN: Come on, come on, Goose. 27 00:02:16,005 --> 00:02:17,880 Come on, get it by him. Get it by him. 28 00:02:18,880 --> 00:02:20,880 (indistinct chatter) 29 00:02:29,338 --> 00:02:31,338 I'll see you back at the house. 30 00:02:32,421 --> 00:02:34,380 Ruthie's back there, too. 31 00:02:34,463 --> 00:02:36,005 Be a full house. 32 00:02:37,005 --> 00:02:38,546 Okay. 33 00:02:41,505 --> 00:02:43,671 -What are you gonna do? -MAN: Come on, Chaz. Come on. 34 00:02:43,755 --> 00:02:45,713 (chatter continues indistinctly) 35 00:02:46,880 --> 00:02:48,796 Come on. 36 00:02:48,880 --> 00:02:50,755 We're going home. 37 00:02:51,838 --> 00:02:54,921 We're going home. Again. 38 00:02:56,005 --> 00:02:57,546 MAN: All right, here you go. Nice grip. 39 00:02:57,630 --> 00:02:59,088 Here you go, kid. 40 00:03:00,421 --> 00:03:02,463 -MAN: Use your glove. -(laughter) 41 00:03:04,463 --> 00:03:06,463 ♪ ♪ 42 00:03:13,630 --> 00:03:15,796 (creaking) 43 00:03:20,005 --> 00:03:21,796 FUTURE JR: It was 1973, 44 00:03:21,880 --> 00:03:24,505 and after failing to pay our rent for five months, 45 00:03:24,588 --> 00:03:28,005 my mom and I had to move back home to my grandpa's house. 46 00:03:28,088 --> 00:03:29,796 (sighs) 47 00:03:37,588 --> 00:03:41,130 Home never meant the same thing to my mother as it did to me. 48 00:03:41,213 --> 00:03:44,713 To her, it meant failure, the place you ended up 49 00:03:44,796 --> 00:03:47,421 when all the things she was counting on fell through. 50 00:03:47,505 --> 00:03:51,671 Work, apartment, boyfriend, not always in that order. 51 00:03:52,671 --> 00:03:54,838 But I loved it. 52 00:03:54,921 --> 00:03:58,963 To me, Grandpa's house was a revolving door of cousins and aunts, 53 00:03:59,046 --> 00:04:01,796 with a full complement of laughter and tears 54 00:04:01,880 --> 00:04:04,130 and an occasional nervous breakdown. 55 00:04:04,213 --> 00:04:07,630 But above all, it's where Uncle Charlie lived. 56 00:04:07,713 --> 00:04:10,921 And when you're 11 years old, you want an Uncle Charlie. 57 00:04:11,005 --> 00:04:14,963 GRANDPA: Everybody needs to know the cesspool isn't taking it. 58 00:04:15,046 --> 00:04:18,588 If you take a leak, take it outside. 59 00:04:19,671 --> 00:04:21,755 I could use a little help in here. 60 00:04:23,005 --> 00:04:24,546 I'm not the maid. 61 00:04:25,671 --> 00:04:26,963 Jesus Christ! 62 00:04:27,046 --> 00:04:29,838 FUTURE JR: My father was a radio DJ in New York. 63 00:04:29,921 --> 00:04:31,796 They called him The Voice. 64 00:04:31,880 --> 00:04:35,463 He played Top 40 hits, and he'd talk about the musicians. 65 00:04:35,546 --> 00:04:37,588 I only met him once, and I was pretty young, 66 00:04:37,671 --> 00:04:42,088 so when I could, I'd sneak away and listen to him on the radio. 67 00:04:42,171 --> 00:04:45,088 I had to sneak, 'cause after he left us, 68 00:04:45,171 --> 00:04:49,838 well, let's just say Mom took a pair of scissors to every picture he was in. 69 00:04:49,921 --> 00:04:51,921 (laughter, indistinct chatter over TV) 70 00:04:54,838 --> 00:04:56,463 (over radio): ♪ Sooner or later ♪ 71 00:04:56,546 --> 00:04:58,463 -♪ Girl, you got to give in ♪ -(children laughing) 72 00:04:58,546 --> 00:05:01,838 ♪ Sooner or later, love is gonna let ya ♪ 73 00:05:01,921 --> 00:05:06,171 ♪ Sooner or later, love is gonna win ♪ 74 00:05:06,255 --> 00:05:08,255 ♪ It's just a matter of time ♪ 75 00:05:08,338 --> 00:05:11,046 ♪ Before you make up your mind ♪ 76 00:05:11,130 --> 00:05:13,796 ♪ To give all that love that you've been hidin'... ♪ 77 00:05:13,880 --> 00:05:16,421 (indistinct sportscast playing) 78 00:05:18,588 --> 00:05:20,588 (Mom sniffling, sobbing softly) 79 00:05:27,505 --> 00:05:29,755 (sighs) 80 00:05:29,838 --> 00:05:31,130 I like it. 81 00:05:31,213 --> 00:05:33,380 (Mom sighs) 82 00:05:33,463 --> 00:05:34,880 Do you? 83 00:05:34,963 --> 00:05:37,296 It's people. I like to have people. 84 00:05:45,630 --> 00:05:48,296 (sighs) Tomorrow is another day. 85 00:05:50,046 --> 00:05:52,421 JR: Why does Grandpa say we should all clear out? 86 00:05:52,505 --> 00:05:57,046 Because he's a selfish old prick who resents taking care of his family. 87 00:05:58,213 --> 00:05:59,796 Like Dad? 88 00:05:59,880 --> 00:06:01,296 No, honey. 89 00:06:01,380 --> 00:06:04,171 Grandpa resents taking care of his family. 90 00:06:04,255 --> 00:06:08,296 Your father has never taken care of anybody at all. 91 00:06:10,880 --> 00:06:12,421 Oh. 92 00:06:12,505 --> 00:06:14,130 (softly): Oh. 93 00:06:15,963 --> 00:06:18,171 ("Love Will Find a Way" by Pablo Cruise playing over radio) 94 00:06:18,255 --> 00:06:20,796 (indistinct, overlapping chatter) 95 00:06:20,880 --> 00:06:23,421 ♪ You'll learn to find your love again ♪ 96 00:06:24,505 --> 00:06:26,088 ♪ So keep your heart open ♪ 97 00:06:26,171 --> 00:06:30,088 ♪ 'Cause love will find a way ♪ 98 00:06:30,171 --> 00:06:32,421 ♪ Yeah. ♪ 99 00:06:32,505 --> 00:06:34,463 (indistinct chatter continues) 100 00:06:34,546 --> 00:06:37,630 THE VOICE: That's Pablo Cruise with "Love Will Find a Way"... 101 00:06:37,713 --> 00:06:39,755 -(radio clatters) -(broadcast cuts out) 102 00:06:39,838 --> 00:06:41,588 (chatter stops) 103 00:06:47,713 --> 00:06:49,546 Hey, now, eat your cereal. 104 00:06:54,171 --> 00:06:55,796 CHARLIE: Okay, two rules. 105 00:06:55,880 --> 00:06:57,796 I'm never gonna let you win, ever. 106 00:06:57,880 --> 00:07:00,463 You beat me, you know you beat me fair and square, 107 00:07:00,546 --> 00:07:02,338 but I never let you win. 108 00:07:02,421 --> 00:07:04,213 And I'm gonna always tell you the truth. 109 00:07:06,171 --> 00:07:08,046 I saw you in the yard playing sports. 110 00:07:08,130 --> 00:07:09,421 You're not very good. 111 00:07:09,505 --> 00:07:12,713 And... probably not gonna get a whole lot better, 112 00:07:12,796 --> 00:07:17,838 so it might be wise for you, in order to avoid tears and disappointment 113 00:07:17,921 --> 00:07:20,755 and, above all, delusion, 114 00:07:20,838 --> 00:07:22,713 you know, find some other activities that you like. 115 00:07:22,796 --> 00:07:25,005 You know, like, uh, what do you like to do the most? 116 00:07:25,088 --> 00:07:26,088 I like to read. 117 00:07:26,171 --> 00:07:28,463 I also like to read. 118 00:07:28,546 --> 00:07:30,505 I mean, I'm good at sports, too, but... 119 00:07:30,588 --> 00:07:33,546 So, this thing about the radio. 120 00:07:33,630 --> 00:07:36,630 You're gonna look for your father in the radio. 121 00:07:36,713 --> 00:07:39,546 You think your father is in the radio. 122 00:07:39,630 --> 00:07:41,671 He's not in the radio. 123 00:07:41,755 --> 00:07:46,380 He's just an asshole who happens to be on the radio. 124 00:07:46,463 --> 00:07:49,046 Don't look for your father to save you. 125 00:07:51,088 --> 00:07:53,005 And don't play sports. 126 00:07:53,088 --> 00:07:55,088 That's all I have to say. 127 00:07:55,171 --> 00:07:56,671 The game is five-card stud. 128 00:07:57,671 --> 00:07:59,671 (dog barking in distance) 129 00:08:03,005 --> 00:08:05,338 JR: Mom can use some money. 130 00:08:05,421 --> 00:08:09,546 THE VOICE: This is The Voice at 97.1 on your dial. 131 00:08:09,630 --> 00:08:11,630 She's really tired after work. 132 00:08:11,713 --> 00:08:14,588 THE VOICE: …top ten songs this week, you'll win a Q97 133 00:08:14,671 --> 00:08:16,630 limited-edition brass belt buckle, 134 00:08:16,713 --> 00:08:20,130 and you'll be registered to win $500. 135 00:08:20,213 --> 00:08:22,421 What do you say? The top ten. 136 00:08:22,505 --> 00:08:25,671 You can't win if you don't play. 137 00:08:28,130 --> 00:08:30,088 MAN: Is this seat taken? 138 00:08:30,171 --> 00:08:32,421 No. 139 00:08:34,671 --> 00:08:36,588 (sighs) 140 00:08:43,963 --> 00:08:45,963 (railway crossing bells clanging) 141 00:08:47,838 --> 00:08:49,838 CHARLIE: Tell your cousin 142 00:08:49,921 --> 00:08:52,463 I said you can ride the fucking bike. 143 00:08:52,546 --> 00:08:55,255 It's not his fucking bike anyway. 144 00:08:55,338 --> 00:08:58,421 It's a house bike. I took that bike out of the dump 145 00:08:58,505 --> 00:09:00,421 and fixed it up for all you little assholes. 146 00:09:00,505 --> 00:09:01,838 Now they're moving to Colorado. 147 00:09:01,921 --> 00:09:03,796 It's your bike anyway. 148 00:09:03,880 --> 00:09:06,588 (sighing): Oh, Jesus, mother of God. 149 00:09:06,671 --> 00:09:08,296 How did you get sick? 150 00:09:08,380 --> 00:09:10,255 I'm not sick. 151 00:09:10,338 --> 00:09:12,713 It's Saturday morning. 152 00:09:12,796 --> 00:09:15,546 This is the way it is. 153 00:09:15,630 --> 00:09:19,546 This is Saturday morning in the life of men. 154 00:09:19,630 --> 00:09:21,338 Oh. 155 00:09:21,421 --> 00:09:23,921 Go around to the bar. Get me a pack of cigarettes. 156 00:09:25,296 --> 00:09:27,296 (phone ringing) 157 00:09:29,171 --> 00:09:31,630 Get that before your grandmother does. 158 00:09:31,713 --> 00:09:34,380 I'm-I'm not here. Whoever... 159 00:09:34,463 --> 00:09:36,630 -Hello? -THE VOICE: Hey. 160 00:09:36,713 --> 00:09:40,505 Now, I know there are a lot of rug rats running around, 161 00:09:40,588 --> 00:09:43,463 but I'm wondering if this is JR. 162 00:09:43,546 --> 00:09:44,796 Dad? 163 00:09:44,880 --> 00:09:45,921 Huh? What? 164 00:09:46,005 --> 00:09:47,505 THE VOICE: That's right, buddy, if this is JR... 165 00:09:47,588 --> 00:09:49,546 CHARLIE: Give me the fucking phone. 166 00:09:49,630 --> 00:09:51,505 -THE VOICE: ...I'm your father. -Mom's not here. 167 00:09:51,588 --> 00:09:53,421 THE VOICE: Well, I'm not calling for your mother, kiddo. 168 00:09:53,505 --> 00:09:54,671 I'm calling for you. 169 00:09:54,755 --> 00:09:57,213 Hey, uh... 170 00:09:57,296 --> 00:09:59,796 How would you like to see a ball game with your old man? 171 00:09:59,880 --> 00:10:03,130 -Really? -Sure. Ball game with your old man. 172 00:10:03,213 --> 00:10:05,005 JR: Mets or Yankees? 173 00:10:05,088 --> 00:10:06,546 THE VOICE: Whatever you like. 174 00:10:06,630 --> 00:10:08,796 Uncle Charlie says the Yankees are assholes, 175 00:10:08,880 --> 00:10:10,796 but the Mets drink at The Dickens. 176 00:10:11,880 --> 00:10:13,546 How is your Uncle Charlie? 177 00:10:13,630 --> 00:10:15,213 How are you? He wants to know. 178 00:10:15,296 --> 00:10:17,130 I'm still short 30 bucks. 179 00:10:20,755 --> 00:10:23,213 Tell him the Mets play the Braves tomorrow night. 180 00:10:23,296 --> 00:10:25,463 JR: Mets play the Braves tomorrow night. 181 00:10:25,546 --> 00:10:26,921 Doesn't mean he's gonna show up. 182 00:10:27,005 --> 00:10:28,963 THE VOICE: Well, I will tell you what, sport. 183 00:10:29,046 --> 00:10:30,921 I'll get a couple tickets. (clears throat) 184 00:10:31,005 --> 00:10:33,338 And I will pick you up at your grandfather's at 6:30. 185 00:10:33,421 --> 00:10:34,796 JR: Great. Thank you. 186 00:10:34,880 --> 00:10:37,088 THE VOICE: We got a lot to catch up on, you and me. 187 00:10:37,171 --> 00:10:38,296 Okay. 188 00:10:38,380 --> 00:10:40,171 -Bye, now. -Bye. 189 00:10:42,671 --> 00:10:44,296 You gonna get my cigarettes? 190 00:10:44,380 --> 00:10:45,546 Oh. 191 00:10:47,171 --> 00:10:49,005 PRIEST: Are you reading this paper? 192 00:10:49,088 --> 00:10:50,505 -Oh, no. -Great. 193 00:10:57,963 --> 00:10:59,338 (chuckles softly) 194 00:10:59,421 --> 00:11:01,713 I... I got an interview at Yale. 195 00:11:01,796 --> 00:11:03,588 (chuckles) 196 00:11:16,713 --> 00:11:18,713 FUTURE JR: He said to be ready at 6:30. 197 00:11:18,796 --> 00:11:22,255 I was ready at 4:30 so as not to fuck up. 198 00:11:22,338 --> 00:11:25,338 You always remember fucking up, so you don't want to. 199 00:11:26,838 --> 00:11:30,671 The thing is, that day, I felt like I had. 200 00:11:30,755 --> 00:11:32,880 That's the thing to remember about a kid. 201 00:11:32,963 --> 00:11:35,505 The kid always thinks he fucked up. 202 00:11:36,880 --> 00:11:38,505 I didn't know what he looked like. 203 00:11:38,588 --> 00:11:42,213 I hadn't been to New York City to see his face on billboards and buses. 204 00:11:42,296 --> 00:11:44,713 I couldn't have picked him out of a crowd. 205 00:11:44,796 --> 00:11:47,921 But I wondered if it was like a thing you would always know, 206 00:11:48,005 --> 00:11:50,796 as if you would always know your father instantly. 207 00:11:51,880 --> 00:11:53,380 It was possible. 208 00:11:57,630 --> 00:11:59,796 -(crickets chirping) -(dog barking in distance) 209 00:11:59,880 --> 00:12:01,880 (vehicle approaching) 210 00:12:01,963 --> 00:12:03,963 (brakes squeaking) 211 00:12:07,296 --> 00:12:09,421 -(engine shuts off) -(door opens) 212 00:12:09,505 --> 00:12:11,338 (door closes) 213 00:12:13,046 --> 00:12:15,463 A little while later, after being arrested while on air 214 00:12:15,546 --> 00:12:18,338 for nonpayment of child support, 215 00:12:18,421 --> 00:12:20,338 The Voice fled the state. 216 00:12:21,755 --> 00:12:24,296 It was about this same period that he called up drunk 217 00:12:24,380 --> 00:12:27,421 and said he put a contract on my mother's life. 218 00:12:27,505 --> 00:12:29,088 He also threatened to kidnap me, 219 00:12:29,171 --> 00:12:31,713 but Uncle Charlie thought this was a less serious threat, 220 00:12:31,796 --> 00:12:34,338 as kidnapping comes with responsibilities. 221 00:12:36,838 --> 00:12:38,880 MOM: We're the Two Musketeers, right? 222 00:12:40,505 --> 00:12:41,838 Yeah. 223 00:12:41,921 --> 00:12:44,380 ("Shotgun" by Jr. Walker & The All Stars playing) 224 00:12:48,713 --> 00:12:50,713 CHARLIE: Let me show you something, okay? 225 00:12:50,796 --> 00:12:53,671 This is the male sciences, all right? 226 00:12:53,755 --> 00:12:55,421 You get your drink. 227 00:12:55,505 --> 00:12:57,213 That goes there. 228 00:12:57,296 --> 00:12:59,838 Got your pack of butts, right? 229 00:12:59,921 --> 00:13:01,713 That goes there. 230 00:13:01,796 --> 00:13:03,838 See that? Look at... look at this guy right there. 231 00:13:03,921 --> 00:13:06,338 See how he's putting his money in his pocket like that? 232 00:13:06,421 --> 00:13:07,588 -Yeah. -Never do that. 233 00:13:07,671 --> 00:13:09,338 That's keeping your money like a drunk. 234 00:13:09,421 --> 00:13:10,630 It's not correct. 235 00:13:10,713 --> 00:13:13,130 Know what you also do? 236 00:13:13,213 --> 00:13:14,963 You take care of your mother. 237 00:13:15,046 --> 00:13:16,921 All right? 238 00:13:17,005 --> 00:13:18,463 All right, give me a hand. 239 00:13:18,546 --> 00:13:21,671 And you take care of, if you have one, your woman. 240 00:13:21,755 --> 00:13:23,713 If you drink, you keep your shit together. 241 00:13:23,796 --> 00:13:25,838 If your shit's not together, you don't drink. 242 00:13:25,921 --> 00:13:27,796 Don't be like one of these assholes here who acts like 243 00:13:27,880 --> 00:13:29,963 it was Jesus who came down and made him late for work 244 00:13:30,046 --> 00:13:31,838 and spend all their money and throw back 245 00:13:31,921 --> 00:13:34,130 Old Hammerhead with vanilla Coke for 30 years. 246 00:13:34,213 --> 00:13:36,796 You know what I'm saying? It's about being a man. 247 00:13:36,880 --> 00:13:39,713 Get your drink. You get your butts. 248 00:13:39,796 --> 00:13:43,380 Don't carry your money like a drunk. Oh, and, uh... 249 00:13:43,463 --> 00:13:46,338 See this? This little compartment in your wallet, right? 250 00:13:46,421 --> 00:13:48,671 That's where you keep your stashies. 251 00:13:48,755 --> 00:13:51,213 That's like a hundred bucks, five, whatever, 252 00:13:51,296 --> 00:13:53,255 depending on the economy. 253 00:13:53,338 --> 00:13:57,505 Important thing is you never, ever drink that money, right? 254 00:13:57,588 --> 00:13:59,505 What else? Hold doors. 255 00:13:59,588 --> 00:14:01,088 Be good to your mother. 256 00:14:01,171 --> 00:14:03,380 Teach you how to change a tire, jump a car. 257 00:14:03,463 --> 00:14:04,755 You know, that's it. 258 00:14:04,838 --> 00:14:07,713 Change a tire, jump a car, take care of your mother, don't drink your stashies. 259 00:14:07,796 --> 00:14:11,005 Oh, one more thing-- very important. 260 00:14:11,088 --> 00:14:14,255 Never under any circumstances hit a woman, 261 00:14:14,338 --> 00:14:16,796 even if she stabs you with scissors. 262 00:14:16,880 --> 00:14:17,921 Got it. 263 00:14:18,005 --> 00:14:20,713 That's it. Male sciences. Right. 264 00:14:22,046 --> 00:14:23,713 Can people read those books? 265 00:14:23,796 --> 00:14:25,880 Can they read... 266 00:14:25,963 --> 00:14:27,588 What are you, soft? 267 00:14:27,671 --> 00:14:29,046 No, I mean, can I read them? 268 00:14:29,130 --> 00:14:30,421 What's the name of this place? 269 00:14:30,505 --> 00:14:31,755 The Dickens. 270 00:14:31,838 --> 00:14:33,671 That's right. 271 00:14:35,005 --> 00:14:37,463 Charles Dickens. You know who that is? 272 00:14:37,546 --> 00:14:39,088 -The owner? -(chuckles) 273 00:14:40,171 --> 00:14:42,213 Yes, you can read 'em. You can read as many as you like. 274 00:14:42,296 --> 00:14:43,838 Take 'em in the poker room. Read 'em all. 275 00:14:43,921 --> 00:14:45,546 Fill yourself up. 276 00:14:45,630 --> 00:14:47,463 And you know what might happen? 277 00:14:47,546 --> 00:14:51,171 If you read enough books, maybe, if you're lucky, 278 00:14:51,255 --> 00:14:53,463 you could become a writer. 279 00:14:54,796 --> 00:14:56,546 FUTURE JR: And that was it. 280 00:14:56,630 --> 00:15:00,088 From that moment on, I wanted to be a writer. 281 00:15:00,171 --> 00:15:01,338 (jingle playing over radio) 282 00:15:01,421 --> 00:15:04,088 GRANDPA (singing along): ♪ Winston tastes good ♪ 283 00:15:04,171 --> 00:15:07,213 ♪ Like a cigarette should. ♪ 284 00:15:07,296 --> 00:15:09,338 Apricots. 285 00:15:10,421 --> 00:15:13,255 -(passes gas) -Ah. I didn't do that. 286 00:15:13,338 --> 00:15:16,255 Your grandfather has a photographic memory. 287 00:15:16,338 --> 00:15:19,005 He knows Greek and Latin. 288 00:15:19,088 --> 00:15:21,755 But here is this-- the furniture is held together with duct tape, 289 00:15:21,838 --> 00:15:24,255 and he's doing this-- he's farting and saying he didn't do it, 290 00:15:24,338 --> 00:15:27,213 saying "apricots" for no reason. 291 00:15:27,296 --> 00:15:29,046 That's what he did with going to college. 292 00:15:29,130 --> 00:15:31,963 And yet you all end up back here. 293 00:15:32,046 --> 00:15:34,755 MOM: You are a stingy, crazy, old bastard. 294 00:15:34,838 --> 00:15:36,130 You are not stingy with money. 295 00:15:36,213 --> 00:15:37,421 Haven't got any. 296 00:15:37,505 --> 00:15:40,880 -You are stingy with love. -(passes gas) 297 00:15:40,963 --> 00:15:42,505 I didn't do that. 298 00:15:42,588 --> 00:15:44,713 Girls become wives and mothers. That was his point of view. 299 00:15:44,796 --> 00:15:47,463 -You became one of them. -Oh, shut up, you old turd! 300 00:15:47,546 --> 00:15:49,463 -(scoffs) -Because he is stingy 301 00:15:49,546 --> 00:15:52,088 with love and understanding, that is why I have no education, 302 00:15:52,171 --> 00:15:54,171 and that is why you-- 303 00:15:54,255 --> 00:15:57,338 I swear to God, I have no idea how-- 304 00:15:57,421 --> 00:15:59,755 you are going to Harvard or Yale. 305 00:15:59,838 --> 00:16:01,713 -(passes gas) -I didn't do that. 306 00:16:01,796 --> 00:16:03,463 MOM: You are going to Harvard or Yale. 307 00:16:03,546 --> 00:16:05,130 CHARLIE: Make up for your disappointments? 308 00:16:05,213 --> 00:16:07,130 -Harvard or Yale. -This from a woman 309 00:16:07,213 --> 00:16:09,338 who earns 30 bucks a day. 310 00:16:09,421 --> 00:16:13,088 And after college-- at Harvard or Yale!-- 311 00:16:13,171 --> 00:16:15,255 you are going to law school. 312 00:16:15,338 --> 00:16:17,838 So you can sue your father for child support. 313 00:16:17,921 --> 00:16:20,838 No, so he can help you with your fines about the septic tank. 314 00:16:20,921 --> 00:16:22,671 (passes gas) 315 00:16:27,796 --> 00:16:29,296 (engine shuts off) 316 00:16:29,380 --> 00:16:31,005 (door opens) 317 00:16:32,505 --> 00:16:34,130 (door closes) 318 00:16:47,880 --> 00:16:51,963 SPORTSCASTER: Fregosi is the hitter facing the right-hander Jenkins. 319 00:16:52,046 --> 00:16:53,838 Infield playing in. 320 00:16:53,921 --> 00:16:55,421 Here comes the pitch. 321 00:16:55,505 --> 00:16:58,421 Fastball is in there for a strike, and it's two and two. 322 00:16:58,505 --> 00:17:01,171 (chuckles, mutters) What the fuck is this? 323 00:17:01,255 --> 00:17:03,713 Hey, Charlie. How's it hanging? 324 00:17:03,796 --> 00:17:05,130 Still got the clap, asshole? 325 00:17:05,213 --> 00:17:06,880 You know I got it from your sister. 326 00:17:06,963 --> 00:17:09,588 -Where's my 30 bucks? -It's up my ass. Come get it. 327 00:17:09,671 --> 00:17:11,838 JR, say hi to your father. 328 00:17:11,921 --> 00:17:14,755 SPORTSCASTER: Jenkins sets, looks in and delivers. 329 00:17:14,838 --> 00:17:16,963 -Swing and a miss! Strike three. -(car door closes) 330 00:17:17,046 --> 00:17:19,130 -THE VOICE: And away we go. -(engine starts) 331 00:17:19,213 --> 00:17:20,838 ("A Long Time Ago" by Jim Croce playing) 332 00:17:20,921 --> 00:17:23,255 ♪ Seems like such a long time ago ♪ 333 00:17:25,171 --> 00:17:28,838 ♪ I was walking on a lonely road ♪ 334 00:17:28,921 --> 00:17:31,838 ♪ Getting tired of dreaming alone ♪ 335 00:17:33,296 --> 00:17:36,921 ♪ Like all the lonely people I had known... ♪ 336 00:17:37,963 --> 00:17:40,380 You like living at your grandfather's house? 337 00:17:40,463 --> 00:17:41,630 Yeah. 338 00:17:41,713 --> 00:17:43,838 I mean... no. 339 00:17:46,213 --> 00:17:47,421 Yes or no? 340 00:17:47,505 --> 00:17:49,838 I mean, I like it, but Mom doesn't. 341 00:17:51,296 --> 00:17:54,463 Well, I think your grandfather is a good man. 342 00:17:54,546 --> 00:17:58,546 Marches to his own drummer, but that's what I like about him. 343 00:17:59,630 --> 00:18:01,963 Mom says he might have lost his mind. 344 00:18:03,005 --> 00:18:07,171 Well, there's that, too. Sometimes your own drummer is a bad idea. 345 00:18:07,255 --> 00:18:10,796 ♪ Was nothing that I had not seen in your eyes... ♪ 346 00:18:12,005 --> 00:18:15,255 It makes Mom sad having to keep going to Grandpa's house. 347 00:18:16,380 --> 00:18:18,630 ♪ I was so afraid to touch you... ♪ 348 00:18:18,713 --> 00:18:20,463 She blame me? 349 00:18:20,546 --> 00:18:22,546 ♪ So I just watched you sleeping... ♪ 350 00:18:25,171 --> 00:18:27,213 See, the thing about women... 351 00:18:29,505 --> 00:18:33,380 Sometimes they don't think about the cause and effect of things. 352 00:18:33,463 --> 00:18:36,130 They want freedom, 353 00:18:36,213 --> 00:18:40,421 but then they blame you for dispensing it once they get it. 354 00:18:41,796 --> 00:18:44,130 At least that's my experience. 355 00:18:44,213 --> 00:18:47,255 One swinging dick to another. I'll give you that one. 356 00:18:47,338 --> 00:18:49,796 ♪ Spent so many nights a-waiting... ♪ 357 00:18:49,880 --> 00:18:54,338 Hey, your mom tells me you listen to your old man on the radio a lot. 358 00:18:54,421 --> 00:18:57,463 She says I listen too much or try to find you. 359 00:18:58,505 --> 00:19:01,171 -You change stations a lot. -(chuckles) 360 00:19:01,255 --> 00:19:03,463 That's the management. 361 00:19:03,546 --> 00:19:06,046 You want to be a disc jockey when you grow up? 362 00:19:06,130 --> 00:19:08,463 -I'm gonna be a lawyer. -Jesus. Why? 363 00:19:08,546 --> 00:19:10,213 Mom wants me to. 364 00:19:11,505 --> 00:19:14,171 Talk a lot of shit and believe anything. 365 00:19:14,255 --> 00:19:16,546 ♪ But in the gold of morning... ♪ 366 00:19:16,630 --> 00:19:18,963 All right. 367 00:19:19,046 --> 00:19:21,005 Good to see you, young man. 368 00:19:22,755 --> 00:19:26,046 -I got a barbecue meeting with a sponsor. -(music stops) 369 00:19:26,130 --> 00:19:27,880 -Can I come? -Nope. 370 00:19:32,171 --> 00:19:34,963 Tell your mother not to spend that all in one place. 371 00:19:36,255 --> 00:19:40,546 As for you, keep listening to the radio. 372 00:19:40,630 --> 00:19:43,338 See you soon, Junior. 373 00:19:43,421 --> 00:19:46,171 A doctor at school says I have no identity. 374 00:19:46,255 --> 00:19:47,671 Jesus. (laughs) 375 00:19:47,755 --> 00:19:49,005 Get one. 376 00:19:49,088 --> 00:19:50,921 I'll see you on the flip side. 377 00:19:57,963 --> 00:19:59,380 See ya. 378 00:20:04,338 --> 00:20:06,255 Hey, asshole. 379 00:20:06,338 --> 00:20:08,630 Good day with the kid? 380 00:20:08,713 --> 00:20:10,921 Fuck you, Charlie. 381 00:20:11,005 --> 00:20:13,921 Give me my 30 bucks or get the fuck out of the car. 382 00:20:15,713 --> 00:20:17,338 Hey, don't be a fucking... You know what? 383 00:20:17,421 --> 00:20:19,213 Don't be trying to be a fucking tough guy, all right? 384 00:20:19,296 --> 00:20:20,963 (grunts) 385 00:20:21,046 --> 00:20:23,130 JR: Why'd you marry him? 386 00:20:23,213 --> 00:20:24,796 MOM: I was young. 387 00:20:25,880 --> 00:20:27,880 I was dumb. 388 00:20:27,963 --> 00:20:30,130 I don't want to be a junior. 389 00:20:30,213 --> 00:20:32,421 I don't want to have the same name. 390 00:20:36,171 --> 00:20:37,921 (Mom sniffles) 391 00:20:39,755 --> 00:20:42,463 You can have any name you want. 392 00:20:42,546 --> 00:20:45,088 ("Magic" by Pilot playing) 393 00:20:45,171 --> 00:20:47,546 MAN: Who was the guy pitched a no-hitter on acid? 394 00:20:47,630 --> 00:20:49,088 -MAN 2: Dock Ellis. -CHARLIE: You can take acid, 395 00:20:49,171 --> 00:20:51,171 you can take fucking Drano. You know what I'm saying? 396 00:20:51,255 --> 00:20:52,921 But you commit. You make a decision. 397 00:20:53,005 --> 00:20:54,588 You shit or wind your watch. 398 00:20:54,671 --> 00:20:58,505 You fucking call it a day or run for president, and that's it. 399 00:20:58,588 --> 00:21:04,088 ♪ Crazy music playing in the morning light... ♪ 400 00:21:04,171 --> 00:21:06,088 What do you need me to do? 401 00:21:06,171 --> 00:21:08,963 -(sighs) Mom can't go to something. -Oh. 402 00:21:09,046 --> 00:21:10,588 I mean, what can't she go to? 403 00:21:10,671 --> 00:21:12,213 Where we going? 404 00:21:12,296 --> 00:21:14,421 ♪ Never believe it's not... ♪ 405 00:21:15,838 --> 00:21:18,380 MAN: Sorry to make you wait. 406 00:21:18,463 --> 00:21:21,380 (sighs) How can I help? 407 00:21:21,463 --> 00:21:23,380 Uh, well, I'm not sure. 408 00:21:23,463 --> 00:21:27,713 Uh, someone said he was having, uh, tantrums. 409 00:21:27,796 --> 00:21:29,838 Maybe you said that. 410 00:21:29,921 --> 00:21:32,588 His mother's a secretary. She's busy. She's not here, so I came. 411 00:21:32,671 --> 00:21:35,213 Maybe you can tell me what this is all about. 412 00:21:35,296 --> 00:21:37,505 The boy won't tell me what his name stands for. 413 00:21:37,588 --> 00:21:39,880 Doesn't stand for anything. His name is JR. 414 00:21:39,963 --> 00:21:41,546 Deal with it. 415 00:21:42,630 --> 00:21:44,296 (chuckles softly) 416 00:21:50,130 --> 00:21:54,088 Maybe this is a weird time for me to tell you that I'm not a psychologist. 417 00:21:54,171 --> 00:21:55,338 Why do you say that? 418 00:21:55,421 --> 00:21:57,088 Well, because I'm not a psychologist 419 00:21:57,171 --> 00:21:59,755 and I'm sitting here with somebody who actually is a psychologist 420 00:21:59,838 --> 00:22:01,380 who maybe knows I'm not a psychologist. 421 00:22:01,463 --> 00:22:03,088 What are you, fucking inert? 422 00:22:09,046 --> 00:22:10,963 (chuckles) All right. 423 00:22:11,046 --> 00:22:13,463 This is your thing? 424 00:22:13,546 --> 00:22:16,880 Nothing is face value, and you're the smartest guy in the room, 425 00:22:16,963 --> 00:22:20,880 and you sit there looking for errors in baseline perception. 426 00:22:20,963 --> 00:22:22,838 Oh, yeah. We all have our jobs. 427 00:22:22,921 --> 00:22:24,963 You have yours. Knock yourself out. 428 00:22:25,046 --> 00:22:26,338 PSYCHOLOGIST: JR-- those are his initials? 429 00:22:26,421 --> 00:22:28,130 CHARLIE: Or it's the contraction for "junior." 430 00:22:28,213 --> 00:22:29,546 What fucking difference does it make? 431 00:22:29,630 --> 00:22:32,213 Well, there's a very big difference if it is being concealed from him 432 00:22:32,296 --> 00:22:34,671 that he's a junior because there is no senior in his life. 433 00:22:34,755 --> 00:22:37,046 CHARLIE: That may never have occurred to him until you just 434 00:22:37,130 --> 00:22:40,963 laid your line of bullshit on the subject to him right to his face. 435 00:22:41,046 --> 00:22:45,296 It is my belief that the uncertainty about the meaning of his name 436 00:22:45,380 --> 00:22:48,546 and the continual questions about it have left him without identity. 437 00:22:48,630 --> 00:22:52,505 Very impressive. No identity, hence identity crisis. 438 00:22:52,588 --> 00:22:55,088 He has no identity, which causes rage. 439 00:22:55,171 --> 00:22:59,046 He has dubiety about his identity, possibly. 440 00:23:00,130 --> 00:23:03,713 How sure are you about your identity? Hmm? 441 00:23:03,796 --> 00:23:06,796 I'm curious because you seem very interested 442 00:23:06,880 --> 00:23:08,963 in his father and his absence, 443 00:23:09,046 --> 00:23:11,671 and you cast it in this very negative light 444 00:23:11,755 --> 00:23:15,005 and bring the kid in here and you're traumatizing him. 445 00:23:15,088 --> 00:23:18,505 We both know you're calling his mother up and asking her out on dates. 446 00:23:22,005 --> 00:23:23,755 Um, that's... 447 00:23:23,838 --> 00:23:25,838 So you're willing to traumatize a little kid 448 00:23:25,921 --> 00:23:27,880 in order to hit on his mother? 449 00:23:30,421 --> 00:23:33,296 FUTURE JR: Uncle Charlie never had the money to go to college. 450 00:23:33,380 --> 00:23:35,088 He was self-taught. 451 00:23:35,171 --> 00:23:39,046 But that didn't mean some dime-store fifth-grade shrink could go toe to toe. 452 00:23:39,130 --> 00:23:40,255 (typewriter bell dings) 453 00:23:40,338 --> 00:23:42,338 (clock ticking) 454 00:23:47,546 --> 00:23:50,296 (sighs) The Family Gazette. 455 00:23:52,838 --> 00:23:55,005 This is great, JR. 456 00:24:10,963 --> 00:24:12,963 (sighs) 457 00:24:16,255 --> 00:24:17,921 (lighter flicks) 458 00:24:18,005 --> 00:24:20,296 Okay. 459 00:24:20,380 --> 00:24:22,213 Here it is. 460 00:24:22,296 --> 00:24:25,046 Lose the drawings. Just get rid of 'em. 461 00:24:25,130 --> 00:24:27,755 I know a lot of guys that think they're writers, 462 00:24:27,838 --> 00:24:30,505 and you'll find in life that most of them are not. 463 00:24:31,838 --> 00:24:33,463 Here's the thing. 464 00:24:33,546 --> 00:24:35,838 You got to have "it." 465 00:24:35,921 --> 00:24:40,463 I don't know what it is, but if you don't have it immediately... 466 00:24:42,130 --> 00:24:43,921 ...you never get it. 467 00:24:50,046 --> 00:24:51,671 And I say you got it. 468 00:24:51,755 --> 00:24:54,171 Oh. I knew it. 469 00:24:54,255 --> 00:24:55,546 Oh, I knew it! I knew it. 470 00:24:55,630 --> 00:24:57,755 There's-there's... there's something. 471 00:24:57,838 --> 00:24:59,713 Calm down. I didn't say you were good. 472 00:24:59,796 --> 00:25:02,005 I said, you know, you could be. 473 00:25:02,088 --> 00:25:04,088 Come here. Come with me. 474 00:25:05,380 --> 00:25:06,505 (door slides open) 475 00:25:06,588 --> 00:25:10,255 Now, what you do is you read all of those. 476 00:25:11,713 --> 00:25:14,713 Now, I don't want to talk to you unless you read all those. 477 00:25:14,796 --> 00:25:17,255 I also don't want to talk to you about all those. 478 00:25:25,505 --> 00:25:27,630 PRIEST: So, Yale interview? 479 00:25:27,713 --> 00:25:29,588 (chuckles) Yeah. 480 00:25:30,671 --> 00:25:32,838 Your mother must be thrilled. 481 00:25:32,921 --> 00:25:34,713 (laughs) 482 00:25:34,796 --> 00:25:37,505 Yeah, you know, it's all she ever wanted. 483 00:25:37,588 --> 00:25:41,421 In my official capacity, I have to say, is the only thing 484 00:25:41,505 --> 00:25:43,880 to concentrate on in this world 485 00:25:43,963 --> 00:25:47,130 is the desire to see the face of God the Father. 486 00:25:48,505 --> 00:25:49,755 Right. 487 00:25:49,838 --> 00:25:52,380 However, the Church is on her last legs. 488 00:25:52,463 --> 00:25:55,380 Three people come to my mass. 489 00:25:56,630 --> 00:25:59,546 I had four, but Mrs. Cafferty took a fall 490 00:25:59,630 --> 00:26:02,296 because she didn't have a good son. 491 00:26:03,505 --> 00:26:05,005 Be a good son. 492 00:26:05,088 --> 00:26:06,713 (chuckles softly) 493 00:26:06,796 --> 00:26:08,588 That's why I'm going to the interview. 494 00:26:08,671 --> 00:26:12,088 Now, tell me, when was the last time you made a good confession? 495 00:26:12,171 --> 00:26:14,255 ("Turn Back the Hands of Time" by Tyrone Davis playing) 496 00:26:14,338 --> 00:26:15,963 Not in my Yale essay. 497 00:26:16,046 --> 00:26:18,005 Well, you want to get in. 498 00:26:18,088 --> 00:26:20,171 (chuckles) Right. 499 00:26:22,338 --> 00:26:23,963 MAN: Hey. Whose kid is that? 500 00:26:24,046 --> 00:26:25,963 My sister's. 501 00:26:26,046 --> 00:26:28,296 Which sister? The hot one or the crazy one? 502 00:26:28,380 --> 00:26:30,505 What, are you fucking stupid? You want to die? 503 00:26:30,588 --> 00:26:32,296 (laughing) 504 00:26:32,380 --> 00:26:35,588 ♪ Can't sleep at night... ♪ 505 00:26:35,671 --> 00:26:37,421 Hey, get that kid a drink on me. 506 00:26:38,588 --> 00:26:42,296 Oh, you're backed up on Bobo. 507 00:26:42,380 --> 00:26:45,713 You know, I got a feeling that, uh, you had a reason to come down here. 508 00:26:45,796 --> 00:26:47,171 You didn't just come down here to come here. 509 00:26:47,255 --> 00:26:49,755 Maybe you forgot. 510 00:26:49,838 --> 00:26:52,088 Grandpa needs a pack of Old Golds. 511 00:26:52,171 --> 00:26:54,880 Never keep somebody away from their cigarettes. 512 00:26:54,963 --> 00:26:57,130 Poor old guy's probably climbing the walls. 513 00:26:57,213 --> 00:27:00,296 Well, you know he's gonna be back in here saying weird shit. Here you go. 514 00:27:01,380 --> 00:27:03,380 ♪ Oh, darling ♪ 515 00:27:03,463 --> 00:27:05,921 ♪ I can't hold out much longer... ♪ 516 00:27:06,005 --> 00:27:07,838 I want to back up Bobo. 517 00:27:07,921 --> 00:27:10,338 (light laughter) 518 00:27:10,421 --> 00:27:12,255 With your grandfather's money? 519 00:27:12,338 --> 00:27:13,338 Yeah. 520 00:27:14,588 --> 00:27:16,046 All right. 521 00:27:16,130 --> 00:27:19,171 -Bobo, you're backed up on the kid. -This kid's all right. 522 00:27:19,255 --> 00:27:20,838 ♪ If I had just one more try... ♪ 523 00:27:20,921 --> 00:27:23,130 Today, we're gonna take a break from our studies, 524 00:27:23,213 --> 00:27:25,171 and we're gonna make invitations. 525 00:27:25,255 --> 00:27:29,046 Handmade invitations for the father-and-son breakfast. 526 00:27:29,130 --> 00:27:31,671 All right, so you're gonna make your own invitations. 527 00:27:31,755 --> 00:27:33,921 You're gonna bring 'em home to your fathers after school. 528 00:27:34,005 --> 00:27:38,588 Saturday morning, we're gonna cook them breakfast, 529 00:27:38,671 --> 00:27:41,505 and you're gonna read to them from your schoolwork, 530 00:27:41,588 --> 00:27:43,546 so everybody gets to know each other better. 531 00:27:43,630 --> 00:27:47,921 All right, and I want you to do things that you do with your dad, all right? 532 00:27:48,005 --> 00:27:50,630 Who needs a scissor? Who needs, like, a colored pencil or something? 533 00:27:50,713 --> 00:27:53,505 Hold on a sec. Let me get those. 534 00:27:53,588 --> 00:27:56,046 All right? Got that? 535 00:27:56,130 --> 00:27:57,630 (school bell ringing) 536 00:27:57,713 --> 00:28:00,671 All right, guys, put invitations on my desk. 537 00:28:00,755 --> 00:28:03,255 Thank you, Michael, Stephen. 538 00:28:03,338 --> 00:28:05,046 Adam, excellent. 539 00:28:05,130 --> 00:28:06,671 I love that. 540 00:28:06,755 --> 00:28:08,338 All right. 541 00:28:11,421 --> 00:28:12,880 What is it, JR? 542 00:28:12,963 --> 00:28:14,421 I don't have a father. 543 00:28:15,505 --> 00:28:18,088 Oh. Did he pass on? 544 00:28:18,171 --> 00:28:19,796 I don't know. Maybe. 545 00:28:19,880 --> 00:28:21,546 I just don't have one. 546 00:28:21,630 --> 00:28:22,963 "Passing on" means dead. 547 00:28:23,046 --> 00:28:24,921 Oh. No, he's not dead. 548 00:28:25,005 --> 00:28:26,463 He's on the radio. 549 00:28:26,546 --> 00:28:29,255 Can I just not come to the breakfast? 550 00:28:30,296 --> 00:28:32,213 You know what, I'm gonna call your mother. 551 00:28:32,296 --> 00:28:34,713 -Okay. -Okay. 552 00:28:34,796 --> 00:28:37,213 Don't they know the way the world is today? 553 00:28:37,296 --> 00:28:40,963 It's hard to tell people about your father, JR, because... 554 00:28:41,046 --> 00:28:43,213 it's hard to know where to begin. 555 00:28:43,296 --> 00:28:45,088 Maybe the police can make him go? 556 00:28:45,171 --> 00:28:48,713 -(Mom laughs) -Police can't make him pay support. 557 00:28:48,796 --> 00:28:51,921 A father-son breakfast might be tough. 558 00:28:52,005 --> 00:28:55,088 Well, why don't you take him, you son of a bitch? 559 00:28:57,088 --> 00:28:58,505 Ah. 560 00:28:59,630 --> 00:29:02,255 Why not? Why not? 561 00:29:02,338 --> 00:29:04,213 (chuckles) Oh, you're gonna take him? 562 00:29:06,630 --> 00:29:09,255 ("Two of a Kind" by Bobby Darin & Johnny Mercer playing) 563 00:29:13,921 --> 00:29:15,546 ♪ Two of a kind ♪ 564 00:29:15,630 --> 00:29:17,171 ♪ For your information ♪ 565 00:29:17,255 --> 00:29:19,713 ♪ We're two of a kind ♪ 566 00:29:21,421 --> 00:29:23,005 ♪ Two of a kind ♪ 567 00:29:23,088 --> 00:29:24,630 ♪ It's my observation ♪ 568 00:29:24,713 --> 00:29:27,338 ♪ We're two of a kind ♪ 569 00:29:28,630 --> 00:29:30,505 ♪ Like peas in a pod ♪ 570 00:29:30,588 --> 00:29:32,213 ♪ And birds of a feather ♪ 571 00:29:32,296 --> 00:29:34,796 ♪ Alone or together you'll find ♪ 572 00:29:34,880 --> 00:29:40,588 ♪ That we are two of a kind ♪ 573 00:29:43,463 --> 00:29:45,213 You two look so handsome. 574 00:29:45,296 --> 00:29:47,630 ♪ What's so wrong thinking life is a song ♪ 575 00:29:47,713 --> 00:29:50,463 ♪ And reaching for a star? ♪ 576 00:29:50,546 --> 00:29:53,005 ♪ And who's to say if we'll go the whole way? ♪ 577 00:29:53,088 --> 00:29:54,921 I remember you. 578 00:29:55,005 --> 00:29:58,421 ♪ At least we got this far ♪ 579 00:29:58,505 --> 00:30:01,796 ♪ Sharing our lot, our vittles and viands ♪ 580 00:30:01,880 --> 00:30:04,755 ♪ We're two of an ilk ♪ 581 00:30:04,838 --> 00:30:07,380 ♪ Say, what if we've got... ♪ 582 00:30:07,463 --> 00:30:10,630 Let's go, before I change my mind. 583 00:30:13,296 --> 00:30:15,130 You have fun. 584 00:30:15,213 --> 00:30:16,921 -Take it easy, kid. -(door opens) 585 00:30:17,005 --> 00:30:19,296 -♪ We're simila-larly inclined ♪ -(door closes) 586 00:30:19,380 --> 00:30:21,005 -♪ Because we're ♪ -(breath shuddering) 587 00:30:21,088 --> 00:30:22,546 Oh, here we go. 588 00:30:22,630 --> 00:30:25,255 ♪ Two of a kind ♪ 589 00:30:26,630 --> 00:30:29,463 ♪ We're two of a kind ♪ 590 00:30:29,546 --> 00:30:31,588 ♪ We like working single ♪ 591 00:30:31,671 --> 00:30:34,630 ♪ Or working in twos ♪ 592 00:30:34,713 --> 00:30:36,588 ♪ Keep us in mind ♪ 593 00:30:36,671 --> 00:30:38,546 ♪ Give us a jingle ♪ 594 00:30:38,630 --> 00:30:41,921 -♪ We got taps on our shoes ♪ -♪ We'll dance ♪ 595 00:30:42,005 --> 00:30:45,963 ♪ We're both of us like the Tower of Pisa ♪ 596 00:30:46,046 --> 00:30:48,005 ♪ I'm-a lean-a like-a he's-a inclined ♪ 597 00:30:48,088 --> 00:30:50,046 ♪ Because we're ♪ 598 00:30:50,130 --> 00:30:55,130 ♪ Two of a kind. ♪ 599 00:30:59,880 --> 00:31:03,171 GRANDPA: Our educational system, and indeed 600 00:31:03,255 --> 00:31:05,380 our society as a whole, 601 00:31:05,463 --> 00:31:09,963 was destroyed in the 19th century by the German influence. 602 00:31:10,046 --> 00:31:11,338 Really? 603 00:31:11,421 --> 00:31:17,213 Ability as a concept, turned into a mechanical, empirical construct. 604 00:31:17,296 --> 00:31:20,880 You may be a beneficiary of this system. 605 00:31:20,963 --> 00:31:25,463 Regardless of the system in place, 606 00:31:25,546 --> 00:31:29,796 he's the likeliest to be able to leave my house 607 00:31:29,880 --> 00:31:32,213 on his own abilities. Hmm? 608 00:31:42,630 --> 00:31:44,296 JR: Thank you for taking me. 609 00:31:44,380 --> 00:31:46,338 Aw. 610 00:31:46,421 --> 00:31:49,088 Don't tell anybody I'm a good grandfather. 611 00:31:49,171 --> 00:31:51,630 -Everybody will want one. -(laughs) 612 00:31:54,171 --> 00:31:59,338 Your mother has a tumor on her thyroid 613 00:31:59,421 --> 00:32:01,671 and is going to have it out. 614 00:32:02,755 --> 00:32:05,796 It might be malignant, hmm? 615 00:32:08,380 --> 00:32:09,630 Be nice to her. 616 00:32:10,796 --> 00:32:12,421 Okay. 617 00:32:12,505 --> 00:32:15,130 ("My Opening Farewell" by Jackson Browne playing) 618 00:32:18,088 --> 00:32:20,921 FUTURE JR: The biopsy proved the tumor was malignant, 619 00:32:21,005 --> 00:32:23,921 so they cut it out, along with her thyroid. 620 00:32:24,005 --> 00:32:26,796 No chemo, no radiation. 621 00:32:26,880 --> 00:32:29,921 They just cut it out, and the cancer was gone. 622 00:32:30,005 --> 00:32:32,380 Sounds easier than it was. 623 00:32:32,463 --> 00:32:35,213 Nothing in my mom's life came easy. 624 00:32:35,296 --> 00:32:39,671 ♪ A lady stands before an open window ♪ 625 00:32:39,755 --> 00:32:41,713 (vehicle approaches, brakes squeak) 626 00:32:41,796 --> 00:32:46,796 ♪ Staring so far away ♪ 627 00:32:46,880 --> 00:32:49,171 (engine shuts off) 628 00:32:49,255 --> 00:32:53,921 ♪ She can almost feel the southern wind blow ♪ 629 00:32:54,005 --> 00:32:56,046 (birds chirping) 630 00:32:56,130 --> 00:32:58,296 ♪ Almost touching her ♪ 631 00:32:58,380 --> 00:32:59,796 (Mom groans) 632 00:32:59,880 --> 00:33:01,963 ♪ Restless day... ♪ 633 00:33:04,630 --> 00:33:06,630 ♪ ♪ 634 00:33:12,130 --> 00:33:13,755 JR: Do you want some water? 635 00:33:14,838 --> 00:33:17,546 MOM: I want you to succeed. 636 00:33:17,630 --> 00:33:19,463 What if I can't? 637 00:33:22,380 --> 00:33:26,921 As God is my witness, 638 00:33:27,005 --> 00:33:32,630 you are going to Yale. 639 00:33:36,296 --> 00:33:38,255 It's gonna cost $11,000. 640 00:33:38,338 --> 00:33:40,255 Yeah? Who says? 641 00:33:40,338 --> 00:33:41,963 Grandpa. 642 00:33:42,046 --> 00:33:43,838 (Mom scoffs) 643 00:33:46,255 --> 00:33:48,463 You mind if your mama believes in you? 644 00:33:50,713 --> 00:33:52,130 No. 645 00:33:53,171 --> 00:33:55,171 CHARLIE: Something's wrong with my brain today. 646 00:33:55,255 --> 00:33:57,338 Wordy Gurdy has me stumped. 647 00:33:57,421 --> 00:33:59,338 What's Wordy Gurdy? 648 00:33:59,421 --> 00:34:00,838 It's a puzzle. 649 00:34:00,921 --> 00:34:04,088 They give you this half-assed clue, and the answers rhyme. 650 00:34:04,171 --> 00:34:07,255 Like, uh... "Jane's vehicles" 651 00:34:07,338 --> 00:34:09,838 is, you know, "Fonda's Hondas." 652 00:34:09,921 --> 00:34:12,380 Life's hard enough without puzzles. 653 00:34:12,463 --> 00:34:14,755 Do puzzles, you don't get Alzheimer's. 654 00:34:14,838 --> 00:34:17,463 This one's bullshit. "Richard's ingredients"? 655 00:34:17,546 --> 00:34:19,755 Who's Richard? Nixon? 656 00:34:19,838 --> 00:34:21,880 JR: "Nixon's fixin's." 657 00:34:27,338 --> 00:34:30,046 -"Terrific Gary." -"Super Cooper." 658 00:34:30,130 --> 00:34:32,963 ("Dancing in the Moonlight" by King Harvest playing) 659 00:34:34,046 --> 00:34:36,630 Oh, that's it-- kid's earned his stripes. 660 00:34:36,713 --> 00:34:38,796 -This kid's a prodigy. -CHARLIE: Gonna have to cut cards 661 00:34:38,880 --> 00:34:40,921 to see who loses their spot in the bowling league. 662 00:34:41,005 --> 00:34:42,755 He's a prodigy, that kid. 663 00:34:42,838 --> 00:34:44,255 Where'd you learn that word? 664 00:34:44,338 --> 00:34:48,380 ♪ We get it almost every night ♪ 665 00:34:48,463 --> 00:34:51,546 ♪ And when that moon gets big and bright ♪ 666 00:34:51,630 --> 00:34:55,130 ♪ It's a supernatural delight ♪ 667 00:34:55,213 --> 00:34:59,671 ♪ Everybody was dancing in the moonlight ♪ 668 00:35:05,463 --> 00:35:09,213 ♪ Everybody here is out of sight ♪ 669 00:35:09,296 --> 00:35:12,005 ♪ They don't bark and they don't bite ♪ 670 00:35:12,088 --> 00:35:16,421 ♪ They keep things loose, they keep things light ♪ 671 00:35:16,505 --> 00:35:19,338 ♪ Everybody was dancing in the moonlight... ♪ 672 00:35:19,421 --> 00:35:20,921 All right, one more. 673 00:35:21,005 --> 00:35:23,005 -Who else is coming? -Pat. 674 00:35:23,088 --> 00:35:25,046 -Who's he? -She. 675 00:35:25,130 --> 00:35:26,546 Your uncle's girlfriend. 676 00:35:26,630 --> 00:35:28,421 Ah, we all make mistakes. 677 00:35:28,505 --> 00:35:31,880 -WOMAN: Where do you think you're going? -It's fucking Wednesday! 678 00:35:31,963 --> 00:35:34,921 I go fucking bowling every fucking Wednesday! Fuck you! 679 00:35:35,005 --> 00:35:37,130 Fuck you, you stupid son of a bitch. Fuck you! 680 00:35:37,213 --> 00:35:38,421 Fuck you! Learn how to fucking drive, you twat. 681 00:35:38,505 --> 00:35:39,713 WOMAN: Fuck you! 682 00:35:39,796 --> 00:35:41,796 -Bitch. -CHARLIE: I see things are going well. 683 00:35:41,880 --> 00:35:44,505 ♪ It's a supernatural delight ♪ 684 00:35:44,588 --> 00:35:48,088 ♪ Everybody was dancing in the moonlight ♪ 685 00:35:48,171 --> 00:35:49,755 PAT: Hiya. 686 00:35:49,838 --> 00:35:51,921 ♪ Dancing in the moonlight ♪ 687 00:35:52,005 --> 00:35:55,380 ♪ Everybody's feeling warm and bright... ♪ 688 00:35:55,463 --> 00:35:57,546 You must be young JR. 689 00:35:57,630 --> 00:35:59,713 What are you doing hanging out with these bums? 690 00:35:59,796 --> 00:36:02,296 I get to go bowling 'cause I did the Wordy Gurdy. 691 00:36:02,380 --> 00:36:04,796 Aw, you must be the apple of your mother's eye. 692 00:36:04,880 --> 00:36:06,755 I hope so, 'cause she's sad. 693 00:36:06,838 --> 00:36:09,213 Okay, that's enough. 694 00:36:09,296 --> 00:36:12,713 ♪ Everybody here is out of sight ♪ 695 00:36:12,796 --> 00:36:15,671 ♪ They don't bark and they don't bite ♪ 696 00:36:15,755 --> 00:36:19,921 ♪ They keep things loose, they keep things light ♪ 697 00:36:20,005 --> 00:36:23,171 ♪ Everybody was dancing in the... ♪ 698 00:36:23,255 --> 00:36:25,421 -(song stops) -(bowling pins crashing) 699 00:36:25,505 --> 00:36:27,630 ("Lonely Girl" by The Expressions playing) 700 00:36:27,713 --> 00:36:29,880 CHARLIE: I don't know, my feet are getting bigger, apparently. 701 00:36:29,963 --> 00:36:31,171 Size 12? 702 00:36:31,255 --> 00:36:34,255 Hey, Bobo, get me a size 13, will you? 703 00:36:35,505 --> 00:36:37,755 How's your mom doing with the cancer? 704 00:36:41,588 --> 00:36:42,796 You kidding me? 705 00:36:45,338 --> 00:36:47,421 A, it's in remission. 706 00:36:47,505 --> 00:36:49,880 Three, shut the fuck up. 707 00:36:51,213 --> 00:36:53,671 I'm sorry. You don't have to be such a dick about it. 708 00:36:58,505 --> 00:37:00,546 I got you, uh, something. 709 00:37:00,630 --> 00:37:04,046 I was gonna hold on to it for a minute, but I'll give it to you now. 710 00:37:04,130 --> 00:37:06,171 Here you go. 711 00:37:06,255 --> 00:37:07,838 Turn it over. 712 00:37:08,921 --> 00:37:11,380 That's Tom Seaver's autograph right there. 713 00:37:11,463 --> 00:37:13,671 -Thank you. -Mm-hmm. 714 00:37:13,755 --> 00:37:16,755 Listen to me. Your mom is gonna be okay. 715 00:37:16,838 --> 00:37:18,171 You understand? 716 00:37:18,255 --> 00:37:19,963 I promise. 717 00:37:20,046 --> 00:37:22,963 You're not gonna see, uh, Pat again, all right? 718 00:37:23,046 --> 00:37:24,630 She wasn't that bad. 719 00:37:24,713 --> 00:37:27,171 Well, it's kind of a last straw kind of thing, you know? 720 00:37:27,255 --> 00:37:30,380 (sighs) Not exactly the first inkblot on her ledger. 721 00:37:31,588 --> 00:37:34,421 You got to be able to do without people, and they got to know it. 722 00:37:34,505 --> 00:37:35,838 It's either all in or nothing. 723 00:37:37,296 --> 00:37:38,546 Know what I mean? 724 00:37:38,630 --> 00:37:41,255 ("It's Your Thing" by The Isley Brothers playing) 725 00:37:41,338 --> 00:37:42,671 Go get a ball. 726 00:37:42,755 --> 00:37:44,546 ♪ It's your thing ♪ 727 00:37:44,630 --> 00:37:46,713 ♪ Do what you wanna do ♪ 728 00:37:48,755 --> 00:37:52,755 ♪ I can't tell you who to sock it to ♪ 729 00:37:52,838 --> 00:37:54,838 ♪ It's your thing ♪ 730 00:37:54,921 --> 00:37:57,588 ♪ Do what you wanna do ♪ 731 00:37:58,796 --> 00:38:02,505 ♪ I can't tell you who to sock it to ♪ 732 00:38:02,588 --> 00:38:05,296 ♪ If you want me to love you ♪ 733 00:38:05,380 --> 00:38:07,963 ♪ Maybe I will, ha ♪ 734 00:38:08,046 --> 00:38:09,713 ♪ Believe me, woman ♪ 735 00:38:09,796 --> 00:38:12,130 ♪ It ain't no big deal ♪ 736 00:38:13,046 --> 00:38:15,338 ♪ Ah, you need love now ♪ 737 00:38:15,421 --> 00:38:17,255 ♪ Just as bad as I do ♪ 738 00:38:17,338 --> 00:38:18,338 Five. 739 00:38:18,421 --> 00:38:21,005 ♪ Makes me no difference now ♪ 740 00:38:21,088 --> 00:38:23,046 ♪ Who you give your thing to ♪ 741 00:38:23,130 --> 00:38:25,755 -♪ Oh, it's your thing ♪ -♪ It's your thing ♪ 742 00:38:25,838 --> 00:38:26,963 ♪ Do what you wanna do ♪ 743 00:38:27,046 --> 00:38:28,880 -Oh! -Oh! 744 00:38:30,213 --> 00:38:33,463 ♪ I can't tell you who to sock it to ♪ 745 00:38:33,546 --> 00:38:35,713 -♪ It's your thing ♪ -♪ It's your thing ♪ 746 00:38:35,796 --> 00:38:37,463 (cheering) 747 00:38:37,546 --> 00:38:39,796 ♪ Do what you wanna do ♪ 748 00:38:39,880 --> 00:38:43,005 ♪ I can't tell you who to sock it... ♪ 749 00:38:43,088 --> 00:38:44,755 (song stops) 750 00:38:44,838 --> 00:38:47,671 "Laconic. Edict. Admonish. 751 00:38:47,755 --> 00:38:50,713 Platitude. Duplicity. Sanctimonious." 752 00:38:50,796 --> 00:38:52,630 Provisional. Strident. 753 00:38:52,713 --> 00:38:55,088 Bucolic. Fulcrum. Inimical. 754 00:38:55,171 --> 00:38:56,838 Jesuitical. 755 00:38:56,921 --> 00:38:58,963 Minion. Eclectic. 756 00:39:03,505 --> 00:39:04,921 Geez, Mom. 757 00:39:05,005 --> 00:39:06,921 -What? It's okay. I don't have lipstick. -I mean... 758 00:39:09,713 --> 00:39:11,338 I won't get in. 759 00:39:12,421 --> 00:39:13,546 Yes, you will. 760 00:39:13,630 --> 00:39:16,171 Uncle Charlie says to go all in. 761 00:39:16,255 --> 00:39:18,463 Yeah, well, your uncle is talking about gambling, 762 00:39:18,546 --> 00:39:20,046 and that's why he lives at home. 763 00:39:20,130 --> 00:39:22,338 Yeah, but isn't this gambling? 764 00:39:24,005 --> 00:39:25,713 It's better than not gambling. 765 00:39:25,796 --> 00:39:27,755 I never gambled. That was my problem. 766 00:39:27,838 --> 00:39:29,838 What about Dad? 767 00:39:34,421 --> 00:39:36,505 (mailbox door opens, closes) 768 00:39:38,755 --> 00:39:40,255 All right. 769 00:39:47,130 --> 00:39:48,546 (sighs) 770 00:39:49,630 --> 00:39:51,421 (takes deep breath) 771 00:39:51,505 --> 00:39:53,046 Oh, my God. 772 00:39:53,130 --> 00:39:54,755 Oh, God. 773 00:39:54,838 --> 00:39:56,588 (sighs): Oh, God. 774 00:39:58,588 --> 00:40:00,296 Oh, Jesus Christ. 775 00:40:00,380 --> 00:40:02,255 -Open it. -I want to open it alone. 776 00:40:02,338 --> 00:40:04,046 -Just open it. -Ma, you open it. 777 00:40:04,130 --> 00:40:05,380 -No. -CHARLIE: That's a call right there. 778 00:40:05,463 --> 00:40:07,255 She's the one with the most invested. 779 00:40:07,338 --> 00:40:08,588 I told her not a dime. 780 00:40:08,671 --> 00:40:10,130 You don't have a fucking dime. 781 00:40:10,213 --> 00:40:11,713 Unfortunately, his mother doesn't have a nickel. 782 00:40:11,796 --> 00:40:12,838 JR, open it! 783 00:40:12,921 --> 00:40:14,963 -I can't open it. I can't open it. -CHARLIE: Just open it. 784 00:40:15,046 --> 00:40:16,505 It's not gonna fucking kill anybody. 785 00:40:16,588 --> 00:40:18,088 I am. I am gonna die. 786 00:40:18,171 --> 00:40:19,796 Oh, for fuck's sake. Give it to me. 787 00:40:19,880 --> 00:40:21,213 No, let JR open it. 788 00:40:21,296 --> 00:40:22,338 Uncle Charlie's a gambler. 789 00:40:22,421 --> 00:40:24,171 -Just let him... -I paid the application fee. 790 00:40:32,796 --> 00:40:34,713 CHARLIE: "Dear Mr. Maguire..." 791 00:40:34,796 --> 00:40:36,380 Uh... 792 00:40:36,463 --> 00:40:38,421 "It is a great pleasure to inform you 793 00:40:38,505 --> 00:40:41,921 "that the Admissions Committee has voted to offer you a place 794 00:40:42,005 --> 00:40:45,046 in the Yale class of 1986." 795 00:40:45,130 --> 00:40:46,713 What? 796 00:40:46,796 --> 00:40:48,796 (stifled sobs) 797 00:40:51,046 --> 00:40:54,838 "I'm also pleased to notify you that your financial need has been met." 798 00:40:54,921 --> 00:40:57,255 -If you're tricking me, I'll kill you. -Read it. 799 00:40:59,421 --> 00:41:01,005 (chuckles) 800 00:41:01,088 --> 00:41:03,296 (takes deep breath) 801 00:41:14,255 --> 00:41:16,713 (chuckles) 802 00:41:16,796 --> 00:41:19,796 -What about Human Learning and Memory? -(mutters) 803 00:41:19,880 --> 00:41:22,546 Always take philosophy, okay? 804 00:41:22,630 --> 00:41:25,713 You always do well in that class, 'cause there's no right answer. 805 00:41:27,505 --> 00:41:30,671 Your mother's gonna come to you and try to give you money. 806 00:41:30,755 --> 00:41:32,046 Don't accept it. 807 00:41:32,130 --> 00:41:34,296 I'll take care of you. 808 00:41:34,380 --> 00:41:35,713 Once. 809 00:41:37,421 --> 00:41:39,505 Talk to your father? 810 00:41:41,380 --> 00:41:42,796 No. 811 00:41:44,421 --> 00:41:45,838 Okay. 812 00:41:53,505 --> 00:41:55,130 JR: I'll come home a lot. 813 00:41:57,546 --> 00:41:59,255 Yeah, this isn't home. 814 00:41:59,338 --> 00:42:00,963 (chuckles) 815 00:42:01,046 --> 00:42:02,671 -Yeah, it is. -No. 816 00:42:03,880 --> 00:42:05,755 -No, it's not. -(door opens) 817 00:42:08,963 --> 00:42:10,630 -Okay, go. -(door closes) 818 00:42:10,713 --> 00:42:13,296 -Go. Go, go, go, go. -(engine starts) 819 00:42:13,380 --> 00:42:14,796 Go. 820 00:42:23,921 --> 00:42:26,796 ("Modern Life" by Devo playing) 821 00:42:26,880 --> 00:42:29,796 ♪ You hunt a bargain just to save a buck ♪ 822 00:42:29,880 --> 00:42:33,005 ♪ Now you're still on the job and it looks like you're stuck ♪ 823 00:42:34,421 --> 00:42:36,130 -How's it going? -Hey. 824 00:42:36,213 --> 00:42:38,213 (indistinct chatter) 825 00:42:44,505 --> 00:42:48,421 ♪ It's a modern life, but it's not what you're looking for ♪ 826 00:42:48,505 --> 00:42:50,505 ♪ Whoa, it's a modern life ♪ 827 00:42:50,588 --> 00:42:54,046 ♪ It's a modern life, but it's not what you're looking for ♪ 828 00:42:54,130 --> 00:42:56,921 (fading): ♪ Whoa, it's a modern life... ♪ 829 00:43:03,255 --> 00:43:04,880 -Hi. -Hey. 830 00:43:04,963 --> 00:43:06,630 -Hey, I'm Jimmy. -JR. 831 00:43:06,713 --> 00:43:08,171 Oh. Well, what does JR stand for? 832 00:43:08,255 --> 00:43:09,838 -Jackie Robinson. -Really? 833 00:43:09,921 --> 00:43:11,546 Nah, it's "Junior." 834 00:43:11,630 --> 00:43:13,713 I was expecting a kind of Brideshead Revisited thing. 835 00:43:13,796 --> 00:43:15,255 This is bullshit. 836 00:43:15,338 --> 00:43:17,130 -This taken? -JR and JIMMY: No. 837 00:43:17,213 --> 00:43:19,171 -I'm Wesley. -I'm Jimmy. 838 00:43:19,255 --> 00:43:20,505 Jimmy? Jim's good. 839 00:43:20,588 --> 00:43:22,880 -JR. -JR. What does that stand for? 840 00:43:22,963 --> 00:43:25,796 -Jackie Robinson. -No shit. 841 00:43:25,880 --> 00:43:27,546 No, it's "Junior." 842 00:43:27,630 --> 00:43:28,671 All right. 843 00:43:28,755 --> 00:43:30,171 Junior, JR. 844 00:43:30,255 --> 00:43:32,130 Jimmy, Jim. 845 00:43:32,213 --> 00:43:33,921 It's our first night at Yale. 846 00:43:34,005 --> 00:43:36,171 -Yeah. -Yeah. 847 00:43:36,255 --> 00:43:38,671 Let's get fucked-up. 848 00:43:38,755 --> 00:43:40,755 (Jimmy chuckles) 849 00:43:40,838 --> 00:43:42,921 PROFESSOR VAN DYKE: You will be making the acquaintance 850 00:43:43,005 --> 00:43:45,046 of Satan. 851 00:43:45,130 --> 00:43:47,255 Not in your own worst impulses 852 00:43:47,338 --> 00:43:49,630 or among your friends-- 853 00:43:49,713 --> 00:43:53,046 though you will, in each case-- 854 00:43:53,130 --> 00:43:55,380 but in Paradise Lost. 855 00:43:57,171 --> 00:44:01,505 For the time being, in this class, though I beat against barbarous current, 856 00:44:01,588 --> 00:44:03,963 I still teach Western literature, 857 00:44:04,046 --> 00:44:09,296 in which everything derives from two epic poems, 858 00:44:09,380 --> 00:44:12,296 the Iliad and the Odyssey, 859 00:44:12,380 --> 00:44:15,838 handily contained for you in one book, 860 00:44:15,921 --> 00:44:18,755 edited and translated by me. 861 00:44:20,296 --> 00:44:24,046 The Iliad and the Odyssey are the two seedlings, 862 00:44:24,130 --> 00:44:27,421 the "poyims" 3,000 years old... 863 00:44:27,505 --> 00:44:28,963 What's a "poyim"? 864 00:44:29,046 --> 00:44:31,046 Somebody who's not Jewish. 865 00:44:31,130 --> 00:44:33,213 VAN DYKE: The Iliad and the Odyssey are universal. 866 00:44:33,296 --> 00:44:35,963 They are stories about going home. 867 00:44:37,296 --> 00:44:40,546 You will start by reading half the Iliad 868 00:44:40,630 --> 00:44:42,921 and write me a ten-page paper. 869 00:44:43,005 --> 00:44:45,380 Any questions? Yes. 870 00:44:45,463 --> 00:44:47,546 Uh, a paper on what? 871 00:44:47,630 --> 00:44:49,338 The first half of the Iliad. 872 00:44:50,380 --> 00:44:52,046 No, right, but on what subject? 873 00:44:52,130 --> 00:44:55,380 The first half of the Iliad. 874 00:44:56,713 --> 00:44:58,796 He's throwing down. 875 00:44:58,880 --> 00:45:02,588 VAN DYKE: Now, as some of you hopefully may know, 876 00:45:02,671 --> 00:45:06,796 the Iliad is an ancient Greek epic poem in dactylic hexameter... 877 00:45:06,880 --> 00:45:08,005 -Hey. -Hmm? 878 00:45:08,088 --> 00:45:09,380 -Who is that? -Who? 879 00:45:09,463 --> 00:45:10,796 In the purple. 880 00:45:11,880 --> 00:45:14,005 -WESLEY: Ah. She goes out with Stinky. -JR: Stinky? 881 00:45:14,088 --> 00:45:15,421 Yeah, he's wealthy. 882 00:45:15,505 --> 00:45:17,963 VAN DYKE: ...grand style of Western classical poetry. 883 00:45:18,046 --> 00:45:21,380 So take note of these and other examples of its use 884 00:45:21,463 --> 00:45:23,963 as you make your way through the text. 885 00:45:24,046 --> 00:45:25,463 Ovid's Metamorphos... 886 00:45:25,546 --> 00:45:27,546 (crickets chirping) 887 00:45:28,588 --> 00:45:30,963 Because everything I see is unattainable. 888 00:45:31,046 --> 00:45:33,005 That's because you're probably being a pussy. 889 00:45:33,088 --> 00:45:34,713 Well, if you're made to read the greatest things ever written, 890 00:45:34,796 --> 00:45:36,296 that you couldn't do, and make you feel like shit, 891 00:45:36,380 --> 00:45:37,921 then how are you supposed to become a writer? 892 00:45:38,005 --> 00:45:40,296 Socrates says you learn more from a bad book than a good one. 893 00:45:40,380 --> 00:45:42,963 Aristotle. I think. 894 00:45:43,046 --> 00:45:45,421 If you go to Yale but you don't have any balls, 895 00:45:45,505 --> 00:45:47,338 how are you supposed to be a student at Yale? 896 00:45:47,421 --> 00:45:50,046 I'm just here on a lucky break. It's just a lucky break. 897 00:45:50,130 --> 00:45:52,755 I mean, I can do Wordy Gurdy all day long, 898 00:45:52,838 --> 00:45:56,130 but I cannot figure out what the fuck they are saying in Henry V. 899 00:45:56,213 --> 00:45:58,963 We're all here on a lucky break, douchebag. 900 00:45:59,046 --> 00:46:01,796 I'm Lucky Sperm Club, and no one's ever noticed that I'm an idiot. 901 00:46:01,880 --> 00:46:03,505 It's also luck. Everybody's lucky. 902 00:46:03,588 --> 00:46:06,255 Everybody alive is lucky 903 00:46:06,338 --> 00:46:08,046 and were descended from the lucky. 904 00:46:08,130 --> 00:46:10,838 Our ancestors were all either fast, smart 905 00:46:10,921 --> 00:46:13,338 or had really fucking good immune systems. 906 00:46:13,421 --> 00:46:16,755 Luck, asshole-- it's why we're all here. 907 00:46:17,755 --> 00:46:20,213 Hmm. I never thought about it like that. 908 00:46:20,296 --> 00:46:23,088 You see, you're believing in society's bullshit interpretation 909 00:46:23,171 --> 00:46:26,421 of you and everything else, and that is why you can't write. 910 00:46:26,505 --> 00:46:28,588 Not because Homer makes you think you suck. 911 00:46:28,671 --> 00:46:30,505 (chuckles softly) 912 00:46:30,588 --> 00:46:32,630 I'd really like for you to meet my Uncle Charlie. 913 00:46:32,713 --> 00:46:35,005 What's he do? 914 00:46:35,088 --> 00:46:37,338 He runs a bar. 915 00:46:37,421 --> 00:46:39,421 I would really like to meet your Uncle Charlie. 916 00:46:39,505 --> 00:46:41,505 ("Dynaflow" by Parish Hall playing) 917 00:46:41,588 --> 00:46:43,588 (indistinct chatter) 918 00:46:46,921 --> 00:46:49,296 -(door opens) -JR: You got your I.D.'s, right? 919 00:46:49,380 --> 00:46:52,588 Hey! The fuck are you guys doing here? 920 00:46:54,838 --> 00:46:57,755 Jesus Christ. 921 00:46:59,588 --> 00:47:01,588 What about these rejects? 922 00:47:02,838 --> 00:47:05,338 Hmm. Okay. 923 00:47:05,421 --> 00:47:07,671 Well, welcome to our shores, Jim. 924 00:47:07,755 --> 00:47:09,671 Hey, I got an announcement. 925 00:47:09,755 --> 00:47:11,421 -(bell jingling) -Everybody, 926 00:47:11,505 --> 00:47:14,546 according to the laws of the sovereign state of New York, 927 00:47:14,630 --> 00:47:16,713 today, my nephew is officially a man. 928 00:47:16,796 --> 00:47:18,755 And so are his friends legally men. 929 00:47:18,838 --> 00:47:21,255 -The law is fucked! -Get these assholes a drink on me. 930 00:47:21,338 --> 00:47:23,505 Fuck you. First one is mine. 931 00:47:23,588 --> 00:47:25,088 Mine. 932 00:47:25,171 --> 00:47:26,838 Then you guys are backed up on Joey D. 933 00:47:26,921 --> 00:47:29,213 -What do you want? -Wow. Uh... 934 00:47:29,296 --> 00:47:31,755 Well, I don't even know what to have. 935 00:47:31,838 --> 00:47:34,171 I think a Yale man should drink gin myself, 936 00:47:34,255 --> 00:47:36,296 but... big decision, Chief. 937 00:47:36,380 --> 00:47:38,588 Whatever you assholes choose now is what I'm gonna pour 938 00:47:38,671 --> 00:47:41,005 every time you walk in the door-- forever. 939 00:47:42,088 --> 00:47:44,130 But you got to have a drink-- your drink. 940 00:47:44,213 --> 00:47:45,838 (sighs) Gin makes me crazy. 941 00:47:45,921 --> 00:47:47,546 We can handle that. We can handle anything. 942 00:47:47,630 --> 00:47:49,296 I make an excellent gin martini. 943 00:47:49,380 --> 00:47:51,088 The secret is a few drops of Scotch. 944 00:47:51,171 --> 00:47:52,880 Come on, Chaz, back 'em up on me. 945 00:47:52,963 --> 00:47:54,755 CHIEF: Back 'em up on me, too, Charlie. 946 00:47:54,838 --> 00:47:59,005 Goodness. Evidently, tonight, you guys are backed up on Chief and Joey D. 947 00:47:59,088 --> 00:48:00,963 Fasten your fucking seat belt. 948 00:48:03,046 --> 00:48:05,296 (horns honking) 949 00:48:05,380 --> 00:48:06,588 So you went to war? 950 00:48:06,671 --> 00:48:08,005 'Nam, Second Division. 951 00:48:08,088 --> 00:48:10,380 Quang Tri, '67 to '69. 952 00:48:10,463 --> 00:48:13,046 You little fuckers will never know such things. 953 00:48:13,130 --> 00:48:17,630 All props to the 82nd, but your little fucking airdrop on Grenada is not a war. 954 00:48:17,713 --> 00:48:20,505 -We didn't airdrop on Grenada. -WESLEY: How long were you in the Army? 955 00:48:20,588 --> 00:48:22,713 One year, seven months, five days. 956 00:48:22,796 --> 00:48:24,005 How long were you in Vietnam? 957 00:48:24,088 --> 00:48:25,213 11 months, 12 days. 958 00:48:25,296 --> 00:48:27,921 Chaz says you're insecure at Yale. 959 00:48:28,005 --> 00:48:29,713 Nah. No. 960 00:48:29,796 --> 00:48:32,380 Well, hey, it's the same as prison. 961 00:48:32,463 --> 00:48:34,171 Anywhere is the same as prison. 962 00:48:34,255 --> 00:48:36,838 You need to find the main guy, who's a problem, 963 00:48:36,921 --> 00:48:38,380 and you rip his fucking lungs out. 964 00:48:38,463 --> 00:48:40,380 CHIEF: The fuck you telling the kid that for? 965 00:48:40,463 --> 00:48:42,880 -That's it. -He's going to Yale, not Rahway. 966 00:48:44,088 --> 00:48:48,046 You know, Uncle Charlie is, like, your old man, basically. 967 00:48:48,130 --> 00:48:50,338 No, he's my Uncle Charlie. 968 00:48:50,421 --> 00:48:52,463 My old man's in a radio. 969 00:48:52,546 --> 00:48:54,380 CHIEF: Your old man's in a radio? 970 00:49:00,088 --> 00:49:02,296 What are you reading this weekend? 971 00:49:02,380 --> 00:49:03,921 Aquinas. 972 00:49:04,005 --> 00:49:06,713 Oh, Jesus Christ. 973 00:49:06,796 --> 00:49:08,921 What? Thomas Aquinas. 974 00:49:09,005 --> 00:49:13,255 Needed to believe there was a God, so he offered the world concrete proof. 975 00:49:13,338 --> 00:49:17,255 If you didn't believe his concrete proof, the Church would cut your nuts off. 976 00:49:17,338 --> 00:49:18,963 -What are you worried about? -I don't wanna. 977 00:49:19,046 --> 00:49:20,546 You don't wanna. 978 00:49:20,630 --> 00:49:22,380 This is when you push. 979 00:49:22,463 --> 00:49:23,838 Right now. 980 00:49:23,921 --> 00:49:25,505 This is when you bet it all. 981 00:49:25,588 --> 00:49:27,130 When you got nothing. 982 00:49:28,963 --> 00:49:31,171 All right, fuck this. 983 00:49:32,255 --> 00:49:35,046 Read Orwell on the lower-upper-middle classes. 984 00:49:35,130 --> 00:49:37,546 They're the ones who really suck. 985 00:49:37,630 --> 00:49:41,255 Once you understand that, you can operate in America. 986 00:49:41,338 --> 00:49:43,380 If you also have a car. 987 00:49:44,963 --> 00:49:47,046 ("Good Times" by Chic playing) 988 00:49:47,130 --> 00:49:48,963 WESLEY: Spent all of last summer in Europe. 989 00:49:49,046 --> 00:49:51,630 Italy. Jesus, Venice. You ever been to Venice? 990 00:49:51,713 --> 00:49:53,046 No. 991 00:49:53,130 --> 00:49:56,921 Most illogical city I have ever seen in my life. 992 00:49:57,005 --> 00:49:59,880 The cab is a boat. The garbage truck is a boat. 993 00:49:59,963 --> 00:50:01,713 Not one bit of it makes any sense. 994 00:50:01,796 --> 00:50:03,296 So how'd you end up in Venice? 995 00:50:03,380 --> 00:50:05,046 Studied hard. I got good grades. 996 00:50:05,130 --> 00:50:06,921 My old man said, "Pick a city." 997 00:50:07,005 --> 00:50:08,755 So, my brother used to make me go with him 998 00:50:08,838 --> 00:50:10,338 and watch Don't Look Now with Donald Sutherland. 999 00:50:10,421 --> 00:50:11,963 Jesus. How old were you? 1000 00:50:12,046 --> 00:50:13,588 That movie made a man out of me. 1001 00:50:13,671 --> 00:50:15,046 But it took place in Venice. 1002 00:50:15,130 --> 00:50:16,380 First movie was The Exorcist. 1003 00:50:16,463 --> 00:50:18,338 My brother had a hard-on for Julie Christie. 1004 00:50:18,421 --> 00:50:20,505 Anyway, long story short, I picked Venice. 1005 00:50:20,588 --> 00:50:22,171 Three weeks turns into three months. 1006 00:50:22,255 --> 00:50:24,546 And The Exorcist scared the fuck out of me, by the way. 1007 00:50:24,630 --> 00:50:27,255 -The moral of the story is... -Right, right. The moral of the story is 1008 00:50:27,338 --> 00:50:29,713 do well in school, and you get to see Italy. 1009 00:50:29,796 --> 00:50:31,880 Sidney. 1010 00:50:31,963 --> 00:50:33,421 Hi. 1011 00:50:33,505 --> 00:50:36,671 -Hi. -How are you? Uh, is Stinky in there? 1012 00:50:36,755 --> 00:50:38,713 I don't know where Alex is. 1013 00:50:38,796 --> 00:50:40,463 I don't see much of him. 1014 00:50:40,546 --> 00:50:41,588 Hey. JR. 1015 00:50:41,671 --> 00:50:43,796 -Sidney. -Hey. 1016 00:50:43,880 --> 00:50:45,421 You're in my class. 1017 00:50:45,505 --> 00:50:47,130 I doubt it. 1018 00:50:47,213 --> 00:50:48,463 (both laughing) 1019 00:50:48,546 --> 00:50:51,421 So, uh, how's your Iliad? 1020 00:50:51,505 --> 00:50:54,255 -Oh. (laughs) -(JR chuckles) 1021 00:50:54,338 --> 00:50:56,130 -My Iliad's fine. -Yeah? 1022 00:50:56,213 --> 00:50:57,796 Yeah. How's yours? 1023 00:50:57,880 --> 00:51:00,838 My Iliad is just getting better and better as the evening progresses. 1024 00:51:00,921 --> 00:51:02,130 -Is that so? -Yeah. 1025 00:51:02,213 --> 00:51:03,338 (laughs) 1026 00:51:06,796 --> 00:51:08,213 How-how was the party? 1027 00:51:08,296 --> 00:51:10,005 Um, not great. 1028 00:51:10,088 --> 00:51:11,213 -No? -No. 1029 00:51:11,296 --> 00:51:12,380 Where you headed? 1030 00:51:13,463 --> 00:51:15,130 Walking home. 1031 00:51:15,213 --> 00:51:17,213 I'll walk you. 1032 00:51:19,046 --> 00:51:20,546 Okay. 1033 00:51:20,630 --> 00:51:22,296 ♪ You silly fool ♪ 1034 00:51:22,380 --> 00:51:24,963 ♪ You can't change your fate ♪ 1035 00:51:25,046 --> 00:51:29,421 ♪ Let's cut a rug, a little jive and jitterbug ♪ 1036 00:51:29,505 --> 00:51:33,713 ♪ We want the best, we won't settle for less ♪ 1037 00:51:33,796 --> 00:51:36,546 ♪ Don't be a drag, participate... ♪ 1038 00:51:38,338 --> 00:51:40,296 SIDNEY: So, what does JR stand for? 1039 00:51:41,463 --> 00:51:43,380 It's a complicated thing. 1040 00:51:43,463 --> 00:51:46,046 I'll tell you when I know you better. 1041 00:51:46,130 --> 00:51:47,755 Is there trauma? 1042 00:51:49,255 --> 00:51:50,713 Yes. 1043 00:51:52,171 --> 00:51:53,880 Father-based? 1044 00:51:56,005 --> 00:51:58,296 I'm named after my father. 1045 00:51:58,380 --> 00:52:00,588 But I've only seen him a couple of times. 1046 00:52:00,671 --> 00:52:03,963 He was always on the radio, in New York. 1047 00:52:04,046 --> 00:52:09,380 He was Johnny Ace or Johnny Michaels on the radio. 1048 00:52:11,630 --> 00:52:13,546 Are you in search for your father? 1049 00:52:15,463 --> 00:52:18,130 (chuckling): No, I'm not. 1050 00:52:18,213 --> 00:52:20,921 If you have a father complex, it's kind of a red flag. 1051 00:52:22,463 --> 00:52:25,505 Women with father complexes tend to eat a lot, 1052 00:52:25,588 --> 00:52:29,505 but men get really fucked-up. 1053 00:52:29,588 --> 00:52:31,421 I don't have a father complex. 1054 00:52:31,505 --> 00:52:33,130 He's just a guy on the radio. 1055 00:52:33,213 --> 00:52:34,838 That's a relief. 1056 00:52:34,921 --> 00:52:36,338 (Sidney laughing) 1057 00:52:38,671 --> 00:52:40,588 So, what do you want to be, JR? 1058 00:52:41,796 --> 00:52:43,921 Other than an emotional mess. 1059 00:52:44,005 --> 00:52:46,171 -Oh. Other than that? -Mm-hmm. 1060 00:52:47,630 --> 00:52:50,088 I want to be a writer. 1061 00:52:50,171 --> 00:52:51,838 I'm going to be a writer. 1062 00:52:53,046 --> 00:52:55,046 Why a writer? 1063 00:52:55,130 --> 00:52:57,088 Ever since I was a kid, I've just... 1064 00:52:57,171 --> 00:52:59,380 I love to read everything I could get my hands on. 1065 00:52:59,463 --> 00:53:01,546 Every great writer, every great book. 1066 00:53:01,630 --> 00:53:03,421 I got into Yale to be a lawyer. 1067 00:53:05,671 --> 00:53:07,671 You don't look like a lawyer. 1068 00:53:07,755 --> 00:53:09,338 (JR chuckles) 1069 00:53:09,421 --> 00:53:11,046 I'll take that as a compliment. 1070 00:53:11,130 --> 00:53:13,213 You do that. 1071 00:53:13,296 --> 00:53:15,088 (both chuckle) 1072 00:53:18,296 --> 00:53:20,005 This is me. 1073 00:53:24,296 --> 00:53:27,005 You want to study together tomorrow? 1074 00:53:28,255 --> 00:53:29,880 Okay. 1075 00:53:30,963 --> 00:53:32,380 Okay. 1076 00:53:34,921 --> 00:53:36,921 Good night, JR. 1077 00:53:37,005 --> 00:53:38,588 Good night. 1078 00:53:38,671 --> 00:53:40,671 ♪ ♪ 1079 00:53:42,338 --> 00:53:44,088 (footsteps ascending stairs) 1080 00:53:44,171 --> 00:53:45,838 (keys jingle, lock clicks) 1081 00:53:56,671 --> 00:53:58,880 ♪ ♪ 1082 00:54:08,838 --> 00:54:10,838 MOM: So you think you're in love? 1083 00:54:12,463 --> 00:54:15,171 Yeah. I think I'm in love. 1084 00:54:15,255 --> 00:54:16,796 She's a lucky girl. 1085 00:54:16,880 --> 00:54:18,713 (scoffs) I don't know about that. 1086 00:54:20,088 --> 00:54:23,296 -You being careful? -Jesus, Mom. Fuck. 1087 00:54:23,380 --> 00:54:25,505 She's clever. She's perceptive. 1088 00:54:25,588 --> 00:54:27,171 Perceptive about what? 1089 00:54:27,255 --> 00:54:28,671 Never mind. 1090 00:54:28,755 --> 00:54:30,213 What, she's rich? 1091 00:54:30,296 --> 00:54:32,963 Probably lower-upper-middle class. 1092 00:54:33,046 --> 00:54:35,005 -That's my boy. -MOM: I don't know what that means. 1093 00:54:35,088 --> 00:54:36,880 "Lower-middle-upper." 1094 00:54:36,963 --> 00:54:39,005 It means the people who think they're rich. 1095 00:54:39,088 --> 00:54:40,505 The actual rich, you never see. 1096 00:54:40,588 --> 00:54:42,463 They hide so people won't kill them. 1097 00:54:42,546 --> 00:54:45,213 I mean, I just feel like Sidney's so up here 1098 00:54:45,296 --> 00:54:47,088 and I'm so down here. 1099 00:54:47,171 --> 00:54:48,921 No, you have so much to offer her. 1100 00:54:49,005 --> 00:54:51,588 No money, no idea what it is I want to do. 1101 00:54:51,671 --> 00:54:53,755 Besides being a lawyer and suing my father. 1102 00:54:53,838 --> 00:54:56,338 What? That's not why I want you to be a lawyer. 1103 00:54:56,421 --> 00:54:58,796 That would be pathological, JR. 1104 00:54:58,880 --> 00:55:02,380 It's not the worst thing if the man puts the woman on a slight pedestal. 1105 00:55:02,463 --> 00:55:03,630 Very slight. 1106 00:55:03,713 --> 00:55:05,880 MOM: Falling in love is a blessing. Try to enjoy it. 1107 00:55:05,963 --> 00:55:08,880 If you get your heart broken, you'll live. 1108 00:55:11,046 --> 00:55:12,755 Ma, I have to ask you something. 1109 00:55:12,838 --> 00:55:14,380 What? 1110 00:55:18,546 --> 00:55:21,296 I need to go to Sidney's for Christmas. 1111 00:55:24,421 --> 00:55:26,421 ♪ ♪ 1112 00:55:41,255 --> 00:55:43,255 ♪ ♪ 1113 00:55:46,838 --> 00:55:48,838 (vehicle approaching) 1114 00:56:04,088 --> 00:56:06,088 ♪ ♪ 1115 00:56:14,546 --> 00:56:16,546 (music playing faintly over radio) 1116 00:56:23,671 --> 00:56:26,796 -What? -What? 1117 00:56:26,880 --> 00:56:30,463 It's Christmas in Connecticut, with a Volvo. 1118 00:56:32,630 --> 00:56:34,671 I'm never gonna train you out of it, am I? 1119 00:56:34,755 --> 00:56:36,921 Train me out of what? 1120 00:56:37,005 --> 00:56:39,880 Thinking things are more than what they are. 1121 00:56:42,921 --> 00:56:45,671 -You ever been to Westport? -No. 1122 00:56:48,630 --> 00:56:50,463 You ever fucked in a Volvo? 1123 00:56:54,588 --> 00:56:58,088 FUTURE JR: There wasn't a thing Sidney wouldn't do or try. 1124 00:56:59,380 --> 00:57:01,588 She taught me about love, 1125 00:57:01,671 --> 00:57:04,838 and that semester just flew by for both of us. 1126 00:57:04,921 --> 00:57:06,421 I wasn't naive. 1127 00:57:06,505 --> 00:57:10,380 I knew that my first great love probably wouldn't be my last. 1128 00:57:10,463 --> 00:57:14,088 But there was something about her, something different, 1129 00:57:14,171 --> 00:57:16,296 something that gave me hope. 1130 00:57:16,380 --> 00:57:18,796 ("Rock Your Baby" by George McCrae playing) 1131 00:57:20,588 --> 00:57:22,171 (panting, grunting) 1132 00:57:22,255 --> 00:57:26,296 ♪ Woman, take me in your arms ♪ 1133 00:57:26,380 --> 00:57:29,463 ♪ Rock your baby ♪ 1134 00:57:29,546 --> 00:57:31,796 (Sidney moaning loudly in other room) 1135 00:57:31,880 --> 00:57:35,755 ♪ Woman, take me in your arms ♪ 1136 00:57:35,838 --> 00:57:38,380 ♪ Rock your baby ♪ 1137 00:57:38,463 --> 00:57:40,213 (moaning continues) 1138 00:57:40,296 --> 00:57:41,963 ♪ Ah-ah... ♪ 1139 00:57:42,046 --> 00:57:43,588 (taking deep breaths) 1140 00:57:43,671 --> 00:57:45,171 ♪ Yeah ♪ 1141 00:57:45,255 --> 00:57:47,130 ♪ Take me in your arms... ♪ 1142 00:57:47,213 --> 00:57:49,213 You okay? 1143 00:57:49,296 --> 00:57:51,171 -Need a doctor? -No. 1144 00:57:51,255 --> 00:57:52,963 -I just need a minute. -Okay. 1145 00:57:53,046 --> 00:57:54,421 ♪ Ah, yeah ♪ 1146 00:57:54,505 --> 00:57:58,046 ♪ Take me in your arms and rock me ♪ 1147 00:57:58,130 --> 00:58:02,130 ♪ Ah-ah... ♪ 1148 00:58:02,213 --> 00:58:04,213 (song fades) 1149 00:58:07,421 --> 00:58:09,380 (sighs) 1150 00:58:11,963 --> 00:58:13,380 Morning, sport. 1151 00:58:13,463 --> 00:58:15,255 (JR sighs) Morning. 1152 00:58:16,921 --> 00:58:18,880 So, my parents... 1153 00:58:20,005 --> 00:58:21,421 They already heard you. 1154 00:58:21,505 --> 00:58:23,713 -Uh-oh. -(laughs) 1155 00:58:23,796 --> 00:58:25,338 They want to meet you. 1156 00:58:34,880 --> 00:58:36,880 I think I should take you to the train. 1157 00:58:37,963 --> 00:58:39,255 Why? 1158 00:58:39,338 --> 00:58:42,213 It's very complicated. 1159 00:58:42,296 --> 00:58:44,213 I'm feeling weird. 1160 00:58:45,296 --> 00:58:47,505 I'm sorry I brought you for Christmas. 1161 00:58:52,796 --> 00:58:54,713 I think I'm seeing someone else. 1162 00:59:02,963 --> 00:59:04,588 I'll see you downstairs. 1163 00:59:26,130 --> 00:59:28,380 SIDNEY'S DAD: Do you like scones, JR? 1164 00:59:28,463 --> 00:59:30,338 JR: Oh, I love scones, sir. 1165 00:59:30,421 --> 00:59:33,088 -Call me Phil. -Thanks, Phil. 1166 00:59:33,171 --> 00:59:37,088 Since you can call him Phil, I suppose you can call me Mrs. Lawson. 1167 00:59:38,088 --> 00:59:39,713 (laughs) 1168 00:59:50,421 --> 00:59:51,505 Mmm. 1169 00:59:58,421 --> 01:00:01,630 (mouth full): Well, Sidney tells me... Excuse me. 1170 01:00:01,713 --> 01:00:03,713 (chuckles) So, Sidney... 1171 01:00:03,796 --> 01:00:06,880 Sidney tells me you're both architects. 1172 01:00:06,963 --> 01:00:09,796 Some people build houses. We build dwellings. 1173 01:00:09,880 --> 01:00:12,588 What's the difference except the word? 1174 01:00:12,671 --> 01:00:15,963 I mean, I just failed an English exam, but a house is a dwelling 1175 01:00:16,046 --> 01:00:18,588 unless it's a cave, and a dwelling is a house... 1176 01:00:18,671 --> 01:00:21,296 They also run the magazine Dwellings. 1177 01:00:21,380 --> 01:00:23,088 JR: What? 1178 01:00:23,171 --> 01:00:24,921 The magazine called Dwellings. 1179 01:00:29,130 --> 01:00:30,463 Oh. 1180 01:00:30,546 --> 01:00:32,421 I don't think you should dwell on it. 1181 01:00:32,505 --> 01:00:34,713 -(light laughter) -JR: No. 1182 01:00:36,171 --> 01:00:38,296 MRS. LAWSON: I understand you have an absconded father 1183 01:00:38,380 --> 01:00:41,588 who's nothing more to you than a voice on the radio. 1184 01:00:43,963 --> 01:00:45,963 Yeah, pretty much. (chuckles softly) 1185 01:00:46,046 --> 01:00:48,671 Are you in psychotherapy? I should think you would be. 1186 01:00:48,755 --> 01:00:50,588 No psychotherapy, no. 1187 01:00:50,671 --> 01:00:52,296 Surprisingly. (chuckles) 1188 01:00:57,005 --> 01:00:58,755 What does your mother do, JR? 1189 01:01:05,255 --> 01:01:08,630 She dwells in Manhasset, 1190 01:01:08,713 --> 01:01:11,880 in a house with her parents, who are both kind of nuts. 1191 01:01:11,963 --> 01:01:13,921 And she's a secretary. 1192 01:01:15,005 --> 01:01:19,796 And one of the things she always loved to do was ride around 1193 01:01:19,880 --> 01:01:21,921 looking at houses like this one 1194 01:01:22,005 --> 01:01:25,213 and wonder what life must be like in them. 1195 01:01:25,296 --> 01:01:27,296 Now I can tell her. 1196 01:01:27,380 --> 01:01:29,463 Please do. 1197 01:01:30,588 --> 01:01:32,588 I will. 1198 01:01:33,671 --> 01:01:35,005 PHIL: What do you study? 1199 01:01:38,296 --> 01:01:41,046 You know, Phil, I study people. 1200 01:01:41,130 --> 01:01:43,296 I think I've always studied people. 1201 01:01:43,380 --> 01:01:45,880 And this is great. 1202 01:01:45,963 --> 01:01:47,796 JR is a writer. 1203 01:01:47,880 --> 01:01:49,838 I mean, what do you study at Yale? 1204 01:01:50,921 --> 01:01:53,338 Usual fucking bullshit. My mother wants me to be a lawyer. 1205 01:01:53,421 --> 01:01:57,130 She sounds like a very intelligent woman, if a trifle optimistic. 1206 01:01:57,213 --> 01:01:58,921 (JR chuckles) 1207 01:02:07,046 --> 01:02:08,963 Phil, you ever fucked in a Volvo? 1208 01:02:10,213 --> 01:02:13,213 ("50 Ways to Leave Your Lover" by Paul Simon playing) 1209 01:02:14,255 --> 01:02:17,005 FUTURE JR: And that was it-- dumped in Connecticut. 1210 01:02:19,255 --> 01:02:24,130 I'd spend the next two years just focusing on making something of myself. 1211 01:02:24,213 --> 01:02:26,421 Being somebody. 1212 01:02:26,505 --> 01:02:28,796 Somebody Sidney would want back. 1213 01:02:28,880 --> 01:02:31,963 ♪ "The problem is all inside your head," she said to me ♪ 1214 01:02:32,046 --> 01:02:33,130 -Hey. -Hi. 1215 01:02:33,213 --> 01:02:34,380 Charlie! 1216 01:02:34,463 --> 01:02:37,880 ♪ "The answer is easy if you take it logically ♪ 1217 01:02:39,046 --> 01:02:42,338 ♪ "I'd like to help you in your struggle to be free ♪ 1218 01:02:42,421 --> 01:02:46,463 ♪ There must be 50 ways to leave your lover" ♪ 1219 01:02:48,046 --> 01:02:52,171 ♪ She said, "It's really not my habit to intrude ♪ 1220 01:02:52,255 --> 01:02:56,630 ♪ "Furthermore, I hope my meaning won't be lost or misconstrued ♪ 1221 01:02:56,713 --> 01:03:01,630 ♪ "But I'll repeat myself at the risk of being crude ♪ 1222 01:03:01,713 --> 01:03:05,546 ♪ "There must be 50 ways to leave your lover ♪ 1223 01:03:07,130 --> 01:03:10,296 ♪ 50 ways to leave your lover" ♪ 1224 01:03:10,380 --> 01:03:13,088 ♪ You just slip out the back, Jack ♪ 1225 01:03:13,171 --> 01:03:15,130 ♪ Make a new plan, Stan ♪ 1226 01:03:15,213 --> 01:03:17,505 ♪ You don't need to be coy, Roy ♪ 1227 01:03:17,588 --> 01:03:20,171 ♪ Just get yourself free ♪ 1228 01:03:20,255 --> 01:03:22,130 ♪ Hop on the bus, Gus ♪ 1229 01:03:22,213 --> 01:03:24,505 ♪ You don't need to discuss much ♪ 1230 01:03:24,588 --> 01:03:26,880 ♪ Just drop off the key, Lee ♪ 1231 01:03:26,963 --> 01:03:29,171 ♪ And get yourself free ♪ 1232 01:03:29,255 --> 01:03:31,796 ♪ Ooh, slip out the back, Jack ♪ 1233 01:03:31,880 --> 01:03:33,796 ♪ Make a new plan, Stan ♪ 1234 01:03:33,880 --> 01:03:35,963 ♪ You don't need to be coy, Roy ♪ 1235 01:03:36,046 --> 01:03:38,713 ♪ Just listen to me ♪ 1236 01:03:38,796 --> 01:03:40,755 ♪ Hop on the bus, Gus ♪ 1237 01:03:40,838 --> 01:03:43,213 ♪ You don't need to discuss much ♪ 1238 01:03:43,296 --> 01:03:45,671 ♪ Just drop off the key, Lee ♪ 1239 01:03:45,755 --> 01:03:47,796 ♪ And get yourself free. ♪ 1240 01:03:47,880 --> 01:03:49,755 JR: This seat taken? 1241 01:03:49,838 --> 01:03:51,713 Look who it is. Sit down there. 1242 01:03:52,796 --> 01:03:54,838 FUTURE JR: My senior year was gonna be epic. 1243 01:03:54,921 --> 01:03:58,046 Writing for the paper, working at the bar. 1244 01:03:58,130 --> 01:03:59,880 This was gonna be my year. 1245 01:03:59,963 --> 01:04:01,796 I didn't need Sidney. 1246 01:04:01,880 --> 01:04:03,713 In fact, fuck Sidney. 1247 01:04:04,755 --> 01:04:06,505 PRIEST: Are you any good at writing? 1248 01:04:06,588 --> 01:04:09,921 I fear that sometimes the question is too little asked. 1249 01:04:11,005 --> 01:04:12,630 I don't know. 1250 01:04:12,713 --> 01:04:14,338 I have stuff in the Yale paper. 1251 01:04:14,421 --> 01:04:16,130 A lot of people don't. 1252 01:04:16,213 --> 01:04:17,588 Lot of people do. (chuckles) 1253 01:04:20,046 --> 01:04:22,130 I always love to see you on this train. 1254 01:04:23,213 --> 01:04:24,755 What's your main trouble? 1255 01:04:24,838 --> 01:04:26,796 I'm just a poor boy who wants a rich girl. 1256 01:04:26,880 --> 01:04:28,463 (chuckles softly) 1257 01:04:28,546 --> 01:04:29,713 That's been done. 1258 01:04:29,796 --> 01:04:31,213 She's not really rich. 1259 01:04:31,296 --> 01:04:33,630 She's lower-upper-middle. 1260 01:04:33,713 --> 01:04:36,713 Well, you never see the real rich. They're invisible. 1261 01:04:38,046 --> 01:04:40,796 Do you have plans in your head to make something of yourself, 1262 01:04:40,880 --> 01:04:42,713 go and sweep her away? 1263 01:04:45,713 --> 01:04:47,130 Maybe. 1264 01:04:47,213 --> 01:04:49,630 If she loved you, she'd take you poor. 1265 01:04:51,213 --> 01:04:52,630 Heard it here first. 1266 01:04:52,713 --> 01:04:54,005 (chuckles) 1267 01:04:54,088 --> 01:04:56,046 I've heard it from someone else. 1268 01:04:56,130 --> 01:04:59,213 Also, the Gatsby thing, you know? 1269 01:05:00,338 --> 01:05:03,463 Well, what's your main theme? Since it isn't really that one. 1270 01:05:03,546 --> 01:05:07,005 The absent father. You know that one? 1271 01:05:08,088 --> 01:05:11,130 Sure, how else do you think people become priests? 1272 01:05:11,213 --> 01:05:12,963 (chuckles) 1273 01:05:17,338 --> 01:05:19,338 (knocking) 1274 01:05:33,588 --> 01:05:35,588 (sighs) 1275 01:05:41,380 --> 01:05:43,213 You know, you really had me going. 1276 01:05:43,296 --> 01:05:45,213 About what? 1277 01:05:45,296 --> 01:05:50,005 Well, for the past year-- year and a half, frankly-- 1278 01:05:50,088 --> 01:05:52,421 it's... my life's been hell. 1279 01:05:53,630 --> 01:05:55,505 About me? 1280 01:05:55,588 --> 01:05:57,296 -Yes, about you. -(chuckles) 1281 01:05:58,296 --> 01:06:00,171 What do you want from me? 1282 01:06:01,338 --> 01:06:03,963 Well, we're seniors. 1283 01:06:06,296 --> 01:06:07,963 I'm getting agita. 1284 01:06:08,046 --> 01:06:12,046 Is agita the root of agitation? 1285 01:06:12,130 --> 01:06:14,463 No. Men who want things are. 1286 01:06:14,546 --> 01:06:18,088 You know, I think you think I want something that I'm not thinking. 1287 01:06:22,005 --> 01:06:24,171 Unless you want me to think it. 1288 01:06:25,588 --> 01:06:27,421 I'm seeing someone. 1289 01:06:29,505 --> 01:06:31,546 You got to be fucking kidding me. 1290 01:06:32,630 --> 01:06:35,963 FUTURE JR: I can't explain it, really, why I kept going back. 1291 01:06:36,046 --> 01:06:38,505 She just had my number. 1292 01:06:38,588 --> 01:06:42,005 WESLEY: All right, so she gets agita, whatever that is. 1293 01:06:42,088 --> 01:06:44,130 JR: It's Yiddish for "nerves." 1294 01:06:44,213 --> 01:06:47,755 WESLEY: All right, so she gets that and she needs her space 1295 01:06:47,838 --> 01:06:50,755 and her time and all that, right? 1296 01:06:50,838 --> 01:06:52,963 So I have a question for you. 1297 01:06:54,255 --> 01:06:56,255 What do you need? 1298 01:06:58,713 --> 01:07:01,463 Look, I'm not a genius. It's an obvious question. 1299 01:07:01,546 --> 01:07:04,796 What do I want? I want to be a writer, but I suck. 1300 01:07:04,880 --> 01:07:07,588 Well, when you suck at writing, that's when you become a journalist. 1301 01:07:07,671 --> 01:07:09,338 I'm not going to law school. 1302 01:07:09,421 --> 01:07:11,255 Neither am I. 1303 01:07:14,130 --> 01:07:17,255 -My mom, she... -Your mom wants you happy. 1304 01:07:17,338 --> 01:07:19,630 Yeah, she does. 1305 01:07:19,713 --> 01:07:21,838 Neither of us know how. 1306 01:07:29,213 --> 01:07:31,755 Let's go back and get graduated. 1307 01:07:32,838 --> 01:07:34,421 (chuckles) 1308 01:07:36,380 --> 01:07:38,005 All right. 1309 01:07:43,588 --> 01:07:45,796 -I'm here. I understand it's a big deal. -Do you? 1310 01:07:45,880 --> 01:07:47,796 -Yeah. -He graduated from Yale. 1311 01:07:47,880 --> 01:07:49,671 Your father graduated from Dartmouth. 1312 01:07:50,755 --> 01:07:53,546 SPEAKER: So, without further ado, let's bring them in. 1313 01:07:53,630 --> 01:07:55,713 Ladies and gentlemen, let's give a warm welcome 1314 01:07:55,796 --> 01:07:58,546 to the Yale class of 1986. 1315 01:07:58,630 --> 01:08:01,546 (Valentin Haussmann's "Polnischer Tanz, Deutscher Tanz" playing) 1316 01:08:07,213 --> 01:08:09,213 (applause) 1317 01:08:21,005 --> 01:08:23,421 -(knocking) -JIMMY: There's a call for you. 1318 01:08:31,546 --> 01:08:33,380 Hello? 1319 01:08:33,463 --> 01:08:35,088 THE VOICE: Remember me? 1320 01:08:36,463 --> 01:08:37,880 Hey, Dad. 1321 01:08:37,963 --> 01:08:39,963 I-I-I didn't make it, as you know. 1322 01:08:40,046 --> 01:08:42,213 Uh, no... no surprise there. 1323 01:08:42,296 --> 01:08:46,338 Uh, but I did want to tell you that, uh... 1324 01:08:46,421 --> 01:08:48,171 I quit drinking. 1325 01:08:48,255 --> 01:08:51,171 And, uh, I've been here and there... 1326 01:08:52,671 --> 01:08:54,671 (laughs) …apologizing 1327 01:08:54,755 --> 01:08:58,380 and... you made the list. 1328 01:08:58,463 --> 01:09:01,296 -Wow. -Oh, come on. Don't fuck with me. 1329 01:09:02,963 --> 01:09:04,588 Hey, I'm glad you made it. 1330 01:09:04,671 --> 01:09:06,630 Uh, I was worried. 1331 01:09:06,713 --> 01:09:09,005 College ain't for everybody. 1332 01:09:09,088 --> 01:09:12,380 It was for Mom, but you got her pregnant. 1333 01:09:12,463 --> 01:09:16,255 Yes, well, we all have to paddle our own canoe, JR. 1334 01:09:16,338 --> 01:09:19,421 Seems like your mother's got you paddling hers a little bit. 1335 01:09:20,505 --> 01:09:24,380 I think she's been paddling both of ours for a very long time. 1336 01:09:27,546 --> 01:09:28,963 Maybe. 1337 01:09:30,463 --> 01:09:33,255 Uh, all right, well, I'm on the air in 15 and change. 1338 01:09:33,338 --> 01:09:34,755 I got to go. 1339 01:09:34,838 --> 01:09:37,046 -Where are you? -(click, dial tone) 1340 01:09:42,755 --> 01:09:44,588 MOM: What law schools are you looking at? 1341 01:09:45,671 --> 01:09:46,963 None. 1342 01:09:47,046 --> 01:09:48,796 I'm gonna be a novelist. 1343 01:09:52,796 --> 01:09:54,380 Where you gonna live? 1344 01:09:54,463 --> 01:09:57,755 At Grandpa's, like everybody. 1345 01:09:57,838 --> 01:09:59,255 We all go to Grandpa's. 1346 01:09:59,338 --> 01:10:03,005 I mean, I-I know you think this is supposed to change everything, but... 1347 01:10:03,088 --> 01:10:04,421 You have to have a job. 1348 01:10:04,505 --> 01:10:07,171 I will have a job-- writing a novel. 1349 01:10:09,338 --> 01:10:11,588 Publishing is going more towards memoir. 1350 01:10:11,671 --> 01:10:13,380 (chuckles) That's true. 1351 01:10:19,713 --> 01:10:21,713 Here. 1352 01:10:21,796 --> 01:10:23,421 Is this for Sidney? 1353 01:10:23,505 --> 01:10:25,255 No. 1354 01:10:25,338 --> 01:10:26,880 Open it. 1355 01:10:34,130 --> 01:10:35,338 It's a Yale ring. 1356 01:10:35,421 --> 01:10:37,921 I don't like male jewelry, but I thought, 1357 01:10:38,005 --> 01:10:40,755 since the Musketeers actually did this together... 1358 01:10:41,838 --> 01:10:43,546 It's for you. 1359 01:10:49,588 --> 01:10:51,588 (JR chuckles) 1360 01:10:59,880 --> 01:11:01,713 WESLEY: Jesus, fuck. 1361 01:11:01,796 --> 01:11:04,546 Symbolically, you just married your mother. 1362 01:11:04,630 --> 01:11:06,546 -Whoa. Take it easy. -All right, all right, all right. 1363 01:11:06,630 --> 01:11:09,380 So let's say... let's say you closed the circle with one parent, right? 1364 01:11:09,463 --> 01:11:11,296 -Yeah. Yeah. -Maybe. 1365 01:11:11,380 --> 01:11:13,130 What about The Voice? 1366 01:11:13,213 --> 01:11:15,463 -I don't even know where he is. -CHARLIE: The Voice... 1367 01:11:15,546 --> 01:11:18,671 locked in a downward spiral since the Carter administration. 1368 01:11:19,838 --> 01:11:23,088 So both you assholes just graduated? 1369 01:11:23,171 --> 01:11:25,838 Charlie, back 'em up on me. 1370 01:11:25,921 --> 01:11:27,463 -Aw. -Thanks, Chief. 1371 01:11:27,546 --> 01:11:30,505 CHIEF: So, how much do they get for a Yale education these days? 1372 01:11:30,588 --> 01:11:32,005 Oh, it's 60 grand. 1373 01:11:32,088 --> 01:11:34,963 -60? -JR got grants and scholarships. 1374 01:11:35,046 --> 01:11:37,255 Wesley, you were a full-ticket guy? 1375 01:11:37,338 --> 01:11:38,546 CHIEF: All right, answer me this. 1376 01:11:38,630 --> 01:11:42,046 What year... was the Magna Carta signed? 1377 01:11:43,130 --> 01:11:45,046 -I don't know. -I don't fucking know. 1378 01:11:45,130 --> 01:11:47,963 -Survey says... -1215. 1379 01:11:48,046 --> 01:11:50,546 It's the foundation of English law. You should know it. 1380 01:11:50,630 --> 01:11:52,713 -Bulwark against tyranny. -King John. 1381 01:11:52,796 --> 01:11:54,630 -CHIEF: That's right. -WESLEY: At this point, Chief, 1382 01:11:54,713 --> 01:11:57,130 -I don't give a shit. -CHIEF: He doesn't give a shit. 1383 01:11:57,213 --> 01:12:00,005 Kid, I'm just trying to keep you out of the ruling classes. That's all. 1384 01:12:00,088 --> 01:12:01,755 Too late, Chief. Too late. 1385 01:12:01,838 --> 01:12:04,838 $60,000. My house cost $12,000. 1386 01:12:04,921 --> 01:12:07,880 -Your house cost $7,000. -My house cost $7,000. 1387 01:12:10,796 --> 01:12:12,963 JR: I was kind of into the "clean break" idea. 1388 01:12:13,046 --> 01:12:14,671 SIDNEY (laughs): We can be friends. 1389 01:12:14,755 --> 01:12:16,713 Just not romantic or sexual. 1390 01:12:16,796 --> 01:12:18,838 That sounds appealing. 1391 01:12:18,921 --> 01:12:20,338 (Sidney laughs) 1392 01:12:20,421 --> 01:12:22,796 So, what are you doing? 1393 01:12:22,880 --> 01:12:24,296 I'm at the bar a lot. 1394 01:12:24,380 --> 01:12:26,463 I'm working on my novel. 1395 01:12:28,130 --> 01:12:30,171 Publishing is heading towards memoir. 1396 01:12:30,255 --> 01:12:32,838 People have been saying that. Yeah. 1397 01:12:32,921 --> 01:12:34,880 So, how many pages do you have? 1398 01:12:36,713 --> 01:12:38,046 Many. 1399 01:12:39,171 --> 01:12:40,880 Have you applied to newspapers? 1400 01:12:40,963 --> 01:12:43,130 -Yeah. Yeah. -You have clips? 1401 01:12:43,213 --> 01:12:44,963 You contacted The New York Times? 1402 01:12:45,046 --> 01:12:47,505 Would you like it if I was at The Times? 1403 01:12:48,755 --> 01:12:50,880 I love you anyway. 1404 01:12:50,963 --> 01:12:52,755 I just don't want a relationship. 1405 01:12:52,838 --> 01:12:54,255 But you have a relationship. 1406 01:12:54,338 --> 01:12:57,255 It's just not romantic or sexual. 1407 01:13:03,505 --> 01:13:05,713 I think The Times is probably out of my league. 1408 01:13:07,380 --> 01:13:09,213 Was Yale out of your league? 1409 01:13:10,296 --> 01:13:12,630 -Can we just go to your place? -No. 1410 01:13:14,171 --> 01:13:15,713 I live with him. 1411 01:13:20,338 --> 01:13:23,630 CHARLIE: So, Sidney saw you in your reduced condition. 1412 01:13:24,713 --> 01:13:26,838 -But she was checking up on you. -Yeah. 1413 01:13:26,921 --> 01:13:29,005 She was trying to see if you had your shit together. 1414 01:13:29,088 --> 01:13:31,463 (laughing): Uh... 1415 01:13:31,546 --> 01:13:35,296 I don't even have any shit to get together. 1416 01:13:35,380 --> 01:13:38,171 -I don't. I don't have anything. -Hey. Hey, hey, listen. 1417 01:13:38,255 --> 01:13:41,671 What did I tell you about the male sciences? 1418 01:13:41,755 --> 01:13:43,380 -Remember that? -Yeah. 1419 01:13:43,463 --> 01:13:45,380 -Right? Have a job. -Right. 1420 01:13:45,463 --> 01:13:46,630 -Have a car. -Yeah. 1421 01:13:46,713 --> 01:13:48,755 -Put all your shit in it. -I don't have any of that. 1422 01:13:48,838 --> 01:13:52,588 So you can be independent, and then somebody might want you. 1423 01:13:52,671 --> 01:13:55,213 And if they don't, you get the fuck out of there. 1424 01:13:57,171 --> 01:13:58,546 Right? 1425 01:13:58,630 --> 01:14:00,296 (JR breathing deeply) 1426 01:14:01,380 --> 01:14:04,213 -(phone rings) -WOMAN: New York Times. 1427 01:14:04,296 --> 01:14:06,380 Yes. Can I tell him who's calling? 1428 01:14:08,130 --> 01:14:09,463 MAN: Take care. 1429 01:14:09,546 --> 01:14:11,546 (indistinct chatter) 1430 01:14:12,921 --> 01:14:14,880 -(phone rings) -WOMAN: New York Times. 1431 01:14:15,921 --> 01:14:17,088 -Hi. Are you JR? -Yes. 1432 01:14:17,171 --> 01:14:18,630 Yeah, you can come with me. 1433 01:14:19,713 --> 01:14:22,046 WOMAN: We all like your clips from New Haven. 1434 01:14:22,130 --> 01:14:23,880 Where are you working now? 1435 01:14:23,963 --> 01:14:25,880 I'm writing fiction, I think. 1436 01:14:25,963 --> 01:14:29,588 And I work at a family business. 1437 01:14:30,588 --> 01:14:33,296 It's a hospitality business. 1438 01:14:33,380 --> 01:14:35,963 A bar on Long Island. 1439 01:14:36,046 --> 01:14:37,671 (chuckles) 1440 01:14:37,755 --> 01:14:41,130 -Your clips are good, Mr. Maguire. -They are? 1441 01:14:41,213 --> 01:14:43,880 The editors feel they need to see more before they make a decision. 1442 01:14:43,963 --> 01:14:45,505 You want to see more? 1443 01:14:45,588 --> 01:14:46,921 Yes. 1444 01:14:48,505 --> 01:14:50,130 Is that good? 1445 01:14:50,213 --> 01:14:52,005 Yes. 1446 01:14:52,088 --> 01:14:53,713 (sighs) 1447 01:14:54,921 --> 01:14:57,130 I don't have more. 1448 01:15:00,005 --> 01:15:01,713 Let me tell Brian that. 1449 01:15:06,046 --> 01:15:07,880 Do you want to meet Brian? 1450 01:15:09,338 --> 01:15:12,213 (chuckles softly) Not if I don't have a job. 1451 01:15:15,255 --> 01:15:17,130 Why don't you come and meet him? 1452 01:15:18,130 --> 01:15:20,213 -(phones ringing) -(heavy, indistinct chatter) 1453 01:15:20,296 --> 01:15:22,296 (typewriter keys clacking) 1454 01:15:43,421 --> 01:15:45,421 JR, come in. 1455 01:15:47,796 --> 01:15:49,255 Hi, sir. 1456 01:15:52,130 --> 01:15:53,963 CHARLIE: So do not write to her 1457 01:15:54,046 --> 01:15:56,338 and tell her that you've improved your position, 1458 01:15:56,421 --> 01:15:58,630 because that will take away all the power and the majesty 1459 01:15:58,713 --> 01:16:00,213 of her finding this out for herself. 1460 01:16:00,296 --> 01:16:02,088 I already did. 1461 01:16:02,171 --> 01:16:05,546 Can you fucking come to me with this shit, please? 1462 01:16:05,630 --> 01:16:08,630 Do not tell her you want her back. Did you say that? 1463 01:16:08,713 --> 01:16:10,630 Uh, yeah. (chuckles) 1464 01:16:10,713 --> 01:16:12,546 Did you go and... 1465 01:16:12,630 --> 01:16:14,963 stare up at the building, like, in the rain and shit? 1466 01:16:15,046 --> 01:16:16,380 No. 1467 01:16:17,463 --> 01:16:18,463 Sidney! 1468 01:16:18,546 --> 01:16:22,713 JR, this girl has abandoned you how many times? 1469 01:16:23,796 --> 01:16:26,546 If someone abandons you, what does that tell you? 1470 01:16:27,588 --> 01:16:29,505 You, of all people. 1471 01:16:29,588 --> 01:16:31,796 She just needs time, you know? 1472 01:16:31,880 --> 01:16:34,963 Yeah, I think you're missing a central fact, 1473 01:16:35,046 --> 01:16:38,630 which is that women decide if they want something or if they don't, 1474 01:16:38,713 --> 01:16:40,838 and it becomes very obvious very fast. 1475 01:16:40,921 --> 01:16:43,505 -But... -Women decide. 1476 01:16:43,588 --> 01:16:46,213 -I know, but... -When you met, who decided? 1477 01:16:46,296 --> 01:16:49,088 -She did. -There you go, numb nuts. 1478 01:16:49,171 --> 01:16:51,380 Standard pattern, obvious to all. 1479 01:16:51,463 --> 01:16:53,671 You do see a pattern, right? 1480 01:16:57,421 --> 01:16:58,838 Hey! (clears throat) 1481 01:16:58,921 --> 01:17:00,880 JR got a job at The Times. 1482 01:17:00,963 --> 01:17:02,963 (others cheering) 1483 01:17:05,338 --> 01:17:07,255 I'm a... I'm a copyboy. 1484 01:17:07,338 --> 01:17:09,630 -(laughing): You're a copyboy? -I-I get sandwiches. I... 1485 01:17:09,713 --> 01:17:12,046 Hey, Charlie, back him up on me. 1486 01:17:14,546 --> 01:17:18,380 So, your first byline presents a, uh, problem. 1487 01:17:18,463 --> 01:17:22,963 Uh, i-initials cannot be used without periods. 1488 01:17:23,046 --> 01:17:24,796 I've done some research, 1489 01:17:24,880 --> 01:17:27,546 and Harry S Truman did not use a dot after his... 1490 01:17:27,630 --> 01:17:29,005 They're not called dots. 1491 01:17:30,880 --> 01:17:33,505 EE Cummings-- uh, no, uh, periods. 1492 01:17:33,588 --> 01:17:35,421 And The Times uses them anyway. 1493 01:17:35,505 --> 01:17:36,880 And do you know why? 1494 01:17:36,963 --> 01:17:38,796 'Cause it looks like we forgot. 1495 01:17:38,880 --> 01:17:43,046 Times style is Times style, and you are J-period R-period Maguire. 1496 01:17:43,130 --> 01:17:45,046 Period. 1497 01:17:45,130 --> 01:17:47,546 There's no periods after a last name. 1498 01:17:47,630 --> 01:17:49,963 My congratulations on your fine work. 1499 01:17:50,046 --> 01:17:52,255 You got a byline in The New York Times. 1500 01:17:58,546 --> 01:17:59,546 Anything else? 1501 01:18:01,213 --> 01:18:03,213 Oh. No, thank you. 1502 01:18:04,296 --> 01:18:06,796 -(phones ringing) -(heavy, indistinct chatter) 1503 01:18:06,880 --> 01:18:08,880 (typewriter keys clacking) 1504 01:18:16,588 --> 01:18:18,046 (chuckles) 1505 01:18:18,130 --> 01:18:19,546 WESLEY: Dad owns the firm. 1506 01:18:19,630 --> 01:18:21,421 Brothers are partners. 1507 01:18:21,505 --> 01:18:22,755 Sooner or later, it's gonna... 1508 01:18:22,838 --> 01:18:24,755 -Lucky Sperm Club. -Lucky Sperm Club. 1509 01:18:24,838 --> 01:18:26,255 -Exactly. Yes. -Here you go. 1510 01:18:26,338 --> 01:18:27,838 Thank you. 1511 01:18:27,921 --> 01:18:29,463 So you got promoted? 1512 01:18:29,546 --> 01:18:32,380 Oh, no, I'm promoted when I become a full-fledged reporter 1513 01:18:32,463 --> 01:18:34,130 and when my byline appears every day. 1514 01:18:34,213 --> 01:18:37,380 And you still won't have the background Sidney's looking for 1515 01:18:37,463 --> 01:18:40,255 and you'll be mainly blossoming as a barfly. 1516 01:18:40,338 --> 01:18:42,296 -Uh-huh, well... -Ah, you know, genetics is tough. 1517 01:18:42,380 --> 01:18:44,005 What are you gonna do? 1518 01:18:44,088 --> 01:18:46,255 Incidentally, where is the old man? 1519 01:18:46,338 --> 01:18:48,255 -Uh, somewhere south. -Mm. 1520 01:18:48,338 --> 01:18:50,171 You know, you're becoming like your mother about Yale. 1521 01:18:50,255 --> 01:18:51,338 Oh, yeah? 1522 01:18:51,421 --> 01:18:53,505 Yeah, you think The Times means something. 1523 01:18:53,588 --> 01:18:55,213 Yeah, because it does. It's The New York fucking Times. 1524 01:18:55,296 --> 01:18:57,630 -No, no, it doesn't. -Well, what does mean something? 1525 01:18:57,713 --> 01:18:59,880 A book. With a book, you'll go years 1526 01:18:59,963 --> 01:19:02,171 before you realize that that doesn't mean anything, either. 1527 01:19:02,255 --> 01:19:05,755 And I'm telling you, JR, I promise you, whether you write at The Times, 1528 01:19:05,838 --> 01:19:08,005 whether you write this book, 1529 01:19:08,088 --> 01:19:11,255 Sidney will still never call you out of the blue to get you back. 1530 01:19:11,338 --> 01:19:12,755 -Okay, and do you know why? -Why? 1531 01:19:12,838 --> 01:19:15,046 Why won't Sidney ever call me, genius who knows everything? 1532 01:19:15,130 --> 01:19:18,005 Because she's dumped you like nine times. 1533 01:19:18,088 --> 01:19:21,046 -(scoffs) -Because she doesn't love you, man. 1534 01:19:23,921 --> 01:19:27,088 Because she's getting married on Memorial Day. 1535 01:19:27,171 --> 01:19:29,380 ("Good Time Charlie's Got the Blues" by Danny O'Keefe playing) 1536 01:19:29,463 --> 01:19:33,088 In retrospect, what you do next is gonna be important. 1537 01:19:34,088 --> 01:19:36,213 WAITRESS: You gentlemen ready to order? 1538 01:19:36,296 --> 01:19:38,463 Four gin martinis, up with a twist. 1539 01:19:39,796 --> 01:19:42,546 ♪ Everybody's gone away ♪ 1540 01:19:45,630 --> 01:19:49,838 ♪ Said they're moving to L.A. ♪ 1541 01:19:51,171 --> 01:19:54,963 ♪ There's not a soul I know around ♪ 1542 01:19:57,088 --> 01:20:00,463 ♪ Everybody's leaving town ♪ 1543 01:20:02,130 --> 01:20:04,838 -♪ Some caught a freight, some caught... ♪ -YOUNG JR: Hey. 1544 01:20:04,921 --> 01:20:06,671 -Wake the fuck up. -(song stops) 1545 01:20:07,671 --> 01:20:09,921 I thought you were gonna be a writer. 1546 01:20:11,005 --> 01:20:12,505 I am. 1547 01:20:12,588 --> 01:20:15,755 No, you're not. You're a copyboy. 1548 01:20:15,838 --> 01:20:17,755 -I write. -A book? 1549 01:20:17,838 --> 01:20:19,921 -No. -So you're just a fuckup. 1550 01:20:20,005 --> 01:20:21,630 -I'm not a fuckup. -Yeah, you are. 1551 01:20:21,713 --> 01:20:23,963 And you come from a long line of fuckups. 1552 01:20:25,046 --> 01:20:26,546 That's true. 1553 01:20:26,630 --> 01:20:28,505 You want to know what I think? 1554 01:20:29,588 --> 01:20:31,005 Probably not. 1555 01:20:31,088 --> 01:20:35,380 I think you should go back to sleep, wake up in 20 years, 1556 01:20:35,463 --> 01:20:37,838 tell everybody how good you could've been. 1557 01:20:40,130 --> 01:20:41,755 That's what I think. 1558 01:20:43,088 --> 01:20:44,630 -Fuck you. -Fuck you... 1559 01:20:44,713 --> 01:20:46,380 (inhales sharply) 1560 01:20:46,463 --> 01:20:48,463 (birds chirping) 1561 01:20:51,505 --> 01:20:53,171 (groans softly) 1562 01:20:55,588 --> 01:20:58,088 -(heavy, indistinct chatter) -(typewriter keys clacking) 1563 01:20:58,171 --> 01:21:00,171 (phones ringing) 1564 01:21:09,713 --> 01:21:11,380 Stinky. 1565 01:21:12,421 --> 01:21:15,255 Hey. He's looking for you. 1566 01:21:16,713 --> 01:21:18,630 (sighs) This is it. 1567 01:21:18,713 --> 01:21:20,088 Lucky bastard. 1568 01:21:23,505 --> 01:21:25,588 BRIAN: As you know, the editors have had a chance 1569 01:21:25,671 --> 01:21:29,296 to carefully review your work, and, um, it's terrific. 1570 01:21:29,380 --> 01:21:32,880 Truly, some of your pieces have been outstanding. 1571 01:21:32,963 --> 01:21:36,713 Though most of them are about, uh, people in bars on Long Island, uh... 1572 01:21:36,796 --> 01:21:38,130 (both chuckle) 1573 01:21:38,213 --> 01:21:41,296 Uh, some of your pieces have been truly, truly outstanding. 1574 01:21:41,380 --> 01:21:45,005 Um, that's why I wish I had better news. 1575 01:21:45,088 --> 01:21:47,713 Um, as you know, um, 1576 01:21:47,796 --> 01:21:51,005 when the committee meets to consider a trainee, 1577 01:21:51,088 --> 01:21:54,046 some editors voice support, some do not. 1578 01:21:54,130 --> 01:21:58,213 A vote's taken-- and, um, I can't tell you who voted how or why-- 1579 01:21:58,296 --> 01:22:00,796 but, um, the end result is 1580 01:22:00,880 --> 01:22:04,005 I cannot offer you a position as a reporter. 1581 01:22:08,338 --> 01:22:09,755 Thank you. 1582 01:22:09,838 --> 01:22:13,296 The feeling is that you lack, uh, experience, you know? 1583 01:22:13,380 --> 01:22:16,213 Smaller newspaper, perhaps, you know? 1584 01:22:16,296 --> 01:22:19,963 Someplace where you can, uh, learn and grow. 1585 01:22:21,796 --> 01:22:23,505 No. Thank you. 1586 01:22:26,630 --> 01:22:28,755 -(phones ringing) -(heavy, indistinct chatter) 1587 01:22:28,838 --> 01:22:30,838 (typewriter keys clacking) 1588 01:22:47,588 --> 01:22:49,213 It's your mom. 1589 01:22:54,088 --> 01:22:55,380 Hello? 1590 01:22:55,463 --> 01:22:57,005 CHARLIE: Don't look at me like that. 1591 01:22:57,088 --> 01:22:58,463 They said it was minor. 1592 01:22:59,755 --> 01:23:01,255 Let me tell you something. 1593 01:23:01,338 --> 01:23:04,130 It may be possible to kill me, 1594 01:23:04,213 --> 01:23:06,255 but it is not easy. 1595 01:23:07,630 --> 01:23:09,963 Okay. You sure you're all right? 1596 01:23:10,046 --> 01:23:12,338 Yeah, I'm fine. 1597 01:23:12,421 --> 01:23:15,130 Good. Be out of here in a few days. 1598 01:23:16,213 --> 01:23:18,088 (sighs) 1599 01:23:18,171 --> 01:23:20,546 What's going on? What's up? 1600 01:23:20,630 --> 01:23:22,213 Ah. 1601 01:23:22,296 --> 01:23:26,005 Well, they didn't offer me that position. 1602 01:23:27,296 --> 01:23:29,380 Pure gold. 1603 01:23:29,463 --> 01:23:31,463 All those assholes are now characters. 1604 01:23:31,546 --> 01:23:32,838 Yeah, I guess so. 1605 01:23:32,921 --> 01:23:35,088 This incident itself is dramatic. 1606 01:23:35,171 --> 01:23:36,463 You can inflate this. 1607 01:23:36,546 --> 01:23:38,046 Yeah. Okay. 1608 01:23:38,130 --> 01:23:39,338 No, I think so. 1609 01:23:39,421 --> 01:23:42,755 Maybe... maybe this is the point where 1610 01:23:42,838 --> 01:23:45,296 you tell me something really important. 1611 01:23:45,380 --> 01:23:47,005 Yeah. 1612 01:23:48,421 --> 01:23:52,796 I... To be honest, I'm not 100% sure we should go memoir. 1613 01:23:52,880 --> 01:23:55,588 But we have to be conscious of the trend, right? 1614 01:23:56,796 --> 01:23:59,255 However, if it is a memoir, 1615 01:23:59,338 --> 01:24:01,921 and if it's gonna have any structure... 1616 01:24:03,046 --> 01:24:04,963 ...you know what you have to do. 1617 01:24:08,338 --> 01:24:11,088 He's in North Carolina doing a talk show. 1618 01:24:14,588 --> 01:24:17,130 Your father came to Manhasset once... (clears throat) 1619 01:24:17,213 --> 01:24:20,213 seeking rapprochements with your mother. 1620 01:24:20,296 --> 01:24:23,171 Came on the train-- didn't have a car. 1621 01:24:23,255 --> 01:24:25,130 Can't have any kind of fucking rapprochements 1622 01:24:25,213 --> 01:24:27,421 with any kind of chick if you don't have a fucking car. 1623 01:24:27,505 --> 01:24:28,630 You know this. 1624 01:24:28,713 --> 01:24:30,671 You've told me, yes, and the stashies in your wallet... 1625 01:24:30,755 --> 01:24:32,171 Maybe in the future of transportation 1626 01:24:32,255 --> 01:24:34,130 or in Holland or whatever, things are different, 1627 01:24:34,213 --> 01:24:37,421 but in America, have a car. 1628 01:24:37,505 --> 01:24:38,588 Right? 1629 01:24:39,921 --> 01:24:44,338 (clears throat) Anyway, your mother already told him to fuck off. 1630 01:24:44,421 --> 01:24:46,088 He shows up. 1631 01:24:46,171 --> 01:24:47,755 Comes into the bar. 1632 01:24:48,796 --> 01:24:52,005 Orders a well Scotch neat. 1633 01:24:52,088 --> 01:24:53,630 (chuckles softly) 1634 01:24:53,713 --> 01:24:55,713 Never order a well Scotch. 1635 01:24:55,796 --> 01:24:57,463 Never order it neat. 1636 01:24:58,588 --> 01:25:01,755 It's a signal that you're reaching the end. 1637 01:25:03,755 --> 01:25:06,505 And in his case, this was 20 years ago. 1638 01:25:09,171 --> 01:25:12,505 And then I loaned the guy 30 bucks, which... 1639 01:25:12,588 --> 01:25:14,588 I have yet to see since. 1640 01:25:16,630 --> 01:25:19,505 And over all these years, 1641 01:25:19,588 --> 01:25:24,171 all I really remember about him is that fucking voice. 1642 01:25:25,255 --> 01:25:27,713 I mean, the set of pipes. 1643 01:25:30,213 --> 01:25:32,880 Uh, as I get older... 1644 01:25:34,046 --> 01:25:36,338 I wonder, 1645 01:25:36,421 --> 01:25:38,546 you know, like... 1646 01:25:38,630 --> 01:25:40,630 what was the fucking problem? 1647 01:25:42,088 --> 01:25:43,921 I mean... 1648 01:25:45,713 --> 01:25:47,171 ...if... 1649 01:25:47,255 --> 01:25:48,296 (sighs) 1650 01:25:50,963 --> 01:25:52,796 Do I remind you of him? 1651 01:25:55,838 --> 01:25:57,713 Lighten up on your drinking. 1652 01:26:01,213 --> 01:26:03,213 (sighs) 1653 01:26:05,838 --> 01:26:07,963 FUTURE JR: He was right, of course. 1654 01:26:08,046 --> 01:26:12,005 First thing he did when he got out of the hospital was light a cigarette. 1655 01:26:12,088 --> 01:26:15,171 What's that line about old dogs and new tricks? 1656 01:26:16,255 --> 01:26:17,463 Speaking of old dogs... 1657 01:26:19,880 --> 01:26:21,505 It was time. 1658 01:26:24,921 --> 01:26:26,921 ♪ ♪ 1659 01:26:54,963 --> 01:26:57,463 Oh, come here and give your old man a hug. 1660 01:27:02,630 --> 01:27:04,255 Thanks for making the trip. 1661 01:27:05,838 --> 01:27:07,213 Yeah. 1662 01:27:10,380 --> 01:27:15,213 (sighs) So, uh, I don't know if I told you on the phone, but, um... 1663 01:27:16,421 --> 01:27:20,046 I'm allowing myself a cocktail from time to time. 1664 01:27:21,838 --> 01:27:23,588 -I thought you were... -You-you want one? 1665 01:27:23,671 --> 01:27:25,046 -WAITRESS: Hey, Johnny. -Hey. 1666 01:27:25,130 --> 01:27:27,088 -What can I get for you? -Um... 1667 01:27:27,171 --> 01:27:29,380 Double Scotch, whatever the well is, 1668 01:27:29,463 --> 01:27:32,213 uh, rocks, splash of water, no fruit. 1669 01:27:32,296 --> 01:27:34,338 No fruit. Okay. 1670 01:27:34,421 --> 01:27:36,130 -And for you? -I'm fine. 1671 01:27:36,213 --> 01:27:37,713 Oh, come on, don't fuck with me. 1672 01:27:37,796 --> 01:27:40,171 -He's gonna have what I'm having. -WAITRESS: You got it. 1673 01:27:42,963 --> 01:27:44,671 I make the rules. 1674 01:27:45,755 --> 01:27:47,255 Unless you can take me. 1675 01:27:51,046 --> 01:27:52,713 You want to take me on? 1676 01:27:55,088 --> 01:27:58,213 For being a shitty father, I'll give you the first shot. 1677 01:27:58,296 --> 01:27:59,921 (chuckles softly) 1678 01:28:01,130 --> 01:28:02,630 I think I'm okay. 1679 01:28:02,713 --> 01:28:04,171 Yeah. 1680 01:28:05,463 --> 01:28:08,630 I'm letting myself have a cocktail from time to time. 1681 01:28:09,671 --> 01:28:11,630 I don't think I told you over the phone 1682 01:28:11,713 --> 01:28:15,838 that I was letting myself have a cocktail from time to time, huh? 1683 01:28:15,921 --> 01:28:20,838 See, I realized that, um, I'm not an alcoholic, so... 1684 01:28:20,921 --> 01:28:22,630 Yeah. 1685 01:28:22,713 --> 01:28:24,005 It's all good. 1686 01:28:24,088 --> 01:28:26,213 You know, when the mood strikes me, 1687 01:28:26,296 --> 01:28:28,630 I can enjoy a cocktail. 1688 01:28:28,713 --> 01:28:32,088 And you can enjoy a cocktail with your old man. 1689 01:28:32,171 --> 01:28:34,088 WAITRESS: Here we go. 1690 01:28:34,171 --> 01:28:35,963 (The Voice clears throat) 1691 01:28:37,046 --> 01:28:38,755 THE VOICE: Thank you. 1692 01:28:46,213 --> 01:28:50,046 Okay, so what are you doing? 1693 01:28:51,171 --> 01:28:53,088 I'm a writer. 1694 01:28:53,171 --> 01:28:55,088 I have a job at The Times. 1695 01:29:00,463 --> 01:29:03,546 And, uh, how's your mother? 1696 01:29:03,630 --> 01:29:05,880 She's good. 1697 01:29:05,963 --> 01:29:07,671 Yeah? 1698 01:29:11,588 --> 01:29:13,963 We're gonna go, uh, have dinner. 1699 01:29:15,005 --> 01:29:16,505 At Kathy's. 1700 01:29:18,046 --> 01:29:20,088 She's the new poontang. (chuckles) 1701 01:29:22,088 --> 01:29:23,880 (The Voice clears throat) 1702 01:29:25,088 --> 01:29:27,338 So... (sighs) 1703 01:29:28,505 --> 01:29:29,921 Let's go. 1704 01:29:45,671 --> 01:29:47,671 (dog barking in distance) 1705 01:29:56,880 --> 01:29:58,505 (sighs) 1706 01:30:14,296 --> 01:30:15,796 THE VOICE: Hey. 1707 01:30:18,963 --> 01:30:22,088 Well, I see y'all started the party without me. 1708 01:30:22,171 --> 01:30:25,421 The party started a long time before I met you. 1709 01:30:26,671 --> 01:30:30,130 This is my son, JR. 1710 01:30:31,130 --> 01:30:33,546 What's the JR stand for? 1711 01:30:34,630 --> 01:30:35,963 Junior. 1712 01:30:36,963 --> 01:30:39,421 Very pleased to meet you, JR. 1713 01:30:39,505 --> 01:30:41,255 Nice to meet you. 1714 01:30:45,755 --> 01:30:47,171 THE VOICE: What's for supper? 1715 01:30:47,255 --> 01:30:49,296 KATHY: I cooked a chicken, got some vegetables. 1716 01:30:49,380 --> 01:30:50,838 What time do you want to eat? 1717 01:30:50,921 --> 01:30:53,380 THE VOICE: Well, we're hungry now. 1718 01:30:53,463 --> 01:30:55,838 What about that one? 1719 01:30:55,921 --> 01:30:57,380 Hmm... 1720 01:30:57,463 --> 01:31:00,338 -That is... Right here? -Yeah, one... the piece has to go here. 1721 01:31:00,421 --> 01:31:03,338 -This piece has to go here. -JR: Nice. 1722 01:31:03,421 --> 01:31:05,588 What do you do with these after you're done? 1723 01:31:07,213 --> 01:31:09,296 Mama shellacs 'em and puts 'em up. 1724 01:31:15,463 --> 01:31:18,213 -That's Venice. -I know. 1725 01:31:19,463 --> 01:31:21,421 Have you ever been there? 1726 01:31:21,505 --> 01:31:22,921 Not yet. 1727 01:31:24,046 --> 01:31:26,046 How do you get to go places? 1728 01:31:29,046 --> 01:31:30,463 How? 1729 01:31:34,338 --> 01:31:36,088 Do well in school. 1730 01:31:38,338 --> 01:31:41,463 Do very well in school. 1731 01:31:44,255 --> 01:31:47,505 That's the first thing I had to do. 1732 01:31:51,630 --> 01:31:56,130 And sometimes that's all there is. 1733 01:31:59,671 --> 01:32:01,171 I'm good at school. 1734 01:32:01,255 --> 01:32:04,713 Yeah, if-if you do very well in school... 1735 01:32:06,255 --> 01:32:07,546 ...no one... 1736 01:32:07,630 --> 01:32:10,088 THE VOICE: Bet you write like nuns fuck. 1737 01:32:19,380 --> 01:32:20,921 Where's this fucking chicken? 1738 01:32:21,005 --> 01:32:23,546 KATHY: Don't need any of your mood swings after the day I had. 1739 01:32:23,630 --> 01:32:25,796 THE VOICE: What kind of fucking day could you possibly have had? 1740 01:32:25,880 --> 01:32:28,171 You out sucking cock to pay for your goddamn chicken? 1741 01:32:28,255 --> 01:32:30,255 -KATHY: You know what, don't touch me! -(thudding) 1742 01:32:36,213 --> 01:32:37,838 JR: Hey! 1743 01:32:43,921 --> 01:32:47,546 Goddamn, you look like you had some kind of a breakthrough. 1744 01:32:49,380 --> 01:32:51,171 Like everything is... 1745 01:32:52,755 --> 01:32:54,380 ...falling into place. 1746 01:32:54,463 --> 01:32:56,630 -Shut the fuck up. -What did you say to me? 1747 01:32:56,713 --> 01:32:59,046 I said shut the fuck up! 1748 01:33:05,463 --> 01:33:07,713 You can't shut me up. 1749 01:33:07,796 --> 01:33:10,005 I'm a broadcast professional. 1750 01:33:12,046 --> 01:33:13,796 You weren't trying to shut me up 1751 01:33:13,880 --> 01:33:15,921 when you were looking for me on the radio dial. 1752 01:33:16,005 --> 01:33:17,838 Fuck you. 1753 01:33:17,921 --> 01:33:19,421 (The Voice exhales sharply) 1754 01:33:19,505 --> 01:33:22,463 Man, you can't shut your daddy up. 1755 01:33:22,546 --> 01:33:26,171 What are you gonna do without the bad guy in your life? 1756 01:33:26,255 --> 01:33:27,880 You're set. 1757 01:33:29,796 --> 01:33:32,671 They'll all say that you never had a chance. 1758 01:33:43,796 --> 01:33:45,755 Where's your phone? 1759 01:33:46,838 --> 01:33:49,463 ("I Thought I Was a Child" by Jackson Browne playing) 1760 01:34:05,005 --> 01:34:07,005 ♪ ♪ 1761 01:34:25,713 --> 01:34:27,713 (song continues over radio) 1762 01:34:28,921 --> 01:34:30,755 Sorry about your father. 1763 01:34:32,838 --> 01:34:34,505 He's not my father. 1764 01:34:36,421 --> 01:34:38,213 You don't get to pick. 1765 01:34:39,671 --> 01:34:41,046 Maybe. 1766 01:34:44,338 --> 01:34:46,338 (dog barking in distance) 1767 01:34:51,838 --> 01:34:53,463 Hi, honey. 1768 01:34:55,380 --> 01:34:56,880 You're not gonna believe it. 1769 01:34:56,963 --> 01:34:58,380 I got a great job. 1770 01:34:58,463 --> 01:35:02,171 Your aunt, of all people, came through. 1771 01:35:03,380 --> 01:35:05,338 It's in Westhampton. I got a desk. 1772 01:35:05,421 --> 01:35:07,463 -Check the top? -Yeah. 1773 01:35:07,546 --> 01:35:10,255 They give you a book with a list of phone numbers and addresses, 1774 01:35:10,338 --> 01:35:14,338 and I talk to them about canceling their whole life and getting term, 1775 01:35:14,421 --> 01:35:18,296 putting the rest into an IRA that builds tax-free. 1776 01:35:19,338 --> 01:35:22,088 -How do I look? -You look fantastic. 1777 01:35:22,171 --> 01:35:24,171 Oh, God. 1778 01:35:24,255 --> 01:35:27,088 I am gonna be late! 1779 01:35:27,171 --> 01:35:30,463 They pay you a base salary, and then you get a percentage of what you sell. 1780 01:35:30,546 --> 01:35:32,130 There's some lasagna in the fridge. 1781 01:35:32,213 --> 01:35:34,463 Leave some for Charlie. Your grandpa already ate. I love you. 1782 01:35:34,546 --> 01:35:35,630 -Okay. -Wish me luck. 1783 01:35:35,713 --> 01:35:37,921 -Good luck. -(sighs) 1784 01:35:38,005 --> 01:35:40,213 You sure this looks okay? 1785 01:35:42,338 --> 01:35:44,338 Yeah. You look perfect. 1786 01:35:46,630 --> 01:35:48,171 (chuckles) 1787 01:35:52,546 --> 01:35:54,505 (chuckles softly) 1788 01:35:54,588 --> 01:35:56,796 CHARLIE: Your mother's settled, you know? 1789 01:35:56,880 --> 01:35:58,421 Selling insurance. 1790 01:35:58,505 --> 01:36:00,130 ("Different Drum" by Stone Poneys playing) 1791 01:36:00,213 --> 01:36:02,630 -Somebody's got to sell insurance, right? -Yeah. 1792 01:36:02,713 --> 01:36:05,380 Some of them are happy, probably. 1793 01:36:05,463 --> 01:36:08,630 But I think Yale mostly took care of her anxieties. 1794 01:36:08,713 --> 01:36:10,130 (laughs) 1795 01:36:10,213 --> 01:36:13,546 It's not my place to judge what she's looking for, but... 1796 01:36:13,630 --> 01:36:15,546 you know, I'd say she's all right. 1797 01:36:15,630 --> 01:36:17,755 Yeah, hope so. 1798 01:36:18,838 --> 01:36:20,713 What's all your stuff doing here? 1799 01:36:21,713 --> 01:36:23,421 I'm going to Manhattan. 1800 01:36:23,505 --> 01:36:25,630 It's time. Wesley has a place. 1801 01:36:26,713 --> 01:36:29,088 Well, if you're gonna be a writer, you got to get a job. 1802 01:36:29,171 --> 01:36:31,671 Yeah. I'm not sure what that is yet. 1803 01:36:32,671 --> 01:36:34,213 Insurance is taken. 1804 01:36:34,296 --> 01:36:35,838 (chuckles) 1805 01:36:37,046 --> 01:36:39,296 It's America. Pick something. 1806 01:36:42,296 --> 01:36:43,546 That everything? 1807 01:36:44,630 --> 01:36:46,088 Yeah, that's it. 1808 01:36:46,171 --> 01:36:47,671 -(keys jingling) -♪ For any person ♪ 1809 01:36:47,755 --> 01:36:49,713 ♪ Place or thing ♪ 1810 01:36:49,796 --> 01:36:51,755 ♪ To try and pull the reins ♪ 1811 01:36:51,838 --> 01:36:53,630 Don't say I never gave you nothing. 1812 01:36:53,713 --> 01:36:55,463 ♪ In on me ♪ 1813 01:36:55,546 --> 01:37:00,296 ♪ So goodbye, I'll be leaving ♪ 1814 01:37:00,380 --> 01:37:02,880 ♪ I see no sense ♪ 1815 01:37:02,963 --> 01:37:04,796 ♪ In this crying and grieving ♪ 1816 01:37:04,880 --> 01:37:07,338 ♪ We'll both live a lot longer... ♪ 1817 01:37:07,421 --> 01:37:09,171 (song stops) 1818 01:37:14,630 --> 01:37:16,380 (sighs, chuckles softly) 1819 01:37:16,463 --> 01:37:18,463 ♪ ♪ 1820 01:37:34,338 --> 01:37:36,171 Whoa. 1821 01:37:36,255 --> 01:37:38,380 -You got to be fucking kidding me. -Whoa. 1822 01:37:38,463 --> 01:37:40,630 CHIEF: You old enough to drive this thing? 1823 01:37:40,713 --> 01:37:43,296 -BOBO: Better treat her with respect. -JOEY D: Steering wheel is on the left. 1824 01:37:43,380 --> 01:37:44,588 It's a man's car. 1825 01:37:44,671 --> 01:37:45,963 You sure there's gas in it? 1826 01:37:46,046 --> 01:37:48,213 I guess you think you're a man now, huh? 1827 01:37:48,296 --> 01:37:49,505 You little punk. 1828 01:37:53,421 --> 01:37:56,088 -It's un-fucking-believable. -(door opens) 1829 01:37:56,171 --> 01:37:58,546 -Guy thinks he's Elvis Presley, you know? -Kid's not a kid. 1830 01:38:03,796 --> 01:38:05,213 BOBO: You guys never gave me a car. 1831 01:38:05,296 --> 01:38:07,171 CHIEF: Actually, he owes me this fucking car. 1832 01:38:07,255 --> 01:38:09,046 (engine starts) 1833 01:38:09,130 --> 01:38:11,630 ("Do It Again" by Steely Dan playing) 1834 01:38:13,963 --> 01:38:16,255 Get the fuck out of here. 1835 01:38:16,338 --> 01:38:17,796 CHIEF: We don't want ya. 1836 01:38:20,088 --> 01:38:22,005 -Scram! -(laughter) 1837 01:38:23,046 --> 01:38:24,380 Don't come back! 1838 01:38:24,463 --> 01:38:26,130 (indistinct shouting) 1839 01:38:29,546 --> 01:38:32,588 FUTURE JR: When you set out to be a lawyer, you go to law school. 1840 01:38:32,671 --> 01:38:34,421 You get a diploma for your effort. 1841 01:38:34,505 --> 01:38:36,088 You pass the bar. 1842 01:38:36,171 --> 01:38:39,796 In the text, it declares you officially a lawyer. 1843 01:38:39,880 --> 01:38:42,088 That's how most jobs work. 1844 01:38:42,171 --> 01:38:44,671 But you're a writer the minute you say you are. 1845 01:38:44,755 --> 01:38:46,588 Nobody gives you a diploma. 1846 01:38:46,671 --> 01:38:50,630 You have to prove it, at least to yourself. 1847 01:38:50,713 --> 01:38:53,921 On that day, driving to Manhattan-- 1848 01:38:54,005 --> 01:38:58,296 stashies in my wallet, Uncle Charlie's car-- 1849 01:38:58,380 --> 01:39:00,838 that's the moment I knew I was a writer. 1850 01:39:02,630 --> 01:39:06,380 And just my luck, publishing was headed toward memoir. 1851 01:39:08,880 --> 01:39:12,838 ♪ In the mornin' you go gunnin' ♪ 1852 01:39:12,921 --> 01:39:16,755 ♪ For the man who stole your water ♪ 1853 01:39:16,838 --> 01:39:20,880 ♪ And you fire till he is done in ♪ 1854 01:39:20,963 --> 01:39:24,671 ♪ But they catch you at the border ♪ 1855 01:39:24,755 --> 01:39:29,088 ♪ And the mourners are all singin' ♪ 1856 01:39:29,171 --> 01:39:32,505 ♪ As they drag you by your feet ♪ 1857 01:39:32,588 --> 01:39:36,338 ♪ But the hangman isn't hangin' ♪ 1858 01:39:36,421 --> 01:39:39,921 ♪ And they put you on the street ♪ 1859 01:39:40,005 --> 01:39:45,546 ♪ Yeah, you go back, Jack, do it again ♪ 1860 01:39:45,630 --> 01:39:48,255 ♪ Wheel turnin' round and round ♪ 1861 01:39:48,338 --> 01:39:51,546 ♪ You go back, Jack, do it again ♪ 1862 01:39:59,588 --> 01:40:03,338 ♪ When you know she's no high climber ♪ 1863 01:40:03,421 --> 01:40:07,213 ♪ Then you find your only friend ♪ 1864 01:40:07,296 --> 01:40:11,005 ♪ In a room with your two-timer ♪ 1865 01:40:11,088 --> 01:40:14,838 ♪ And you're sure you're near the end ♪ 1866 01:40:14,921 --> 01:40:18,671 ♪ Then you love a little wild one ♪ 1867 01:40:18,755 --> 01:40:22,505 ♪ And she brings you only sorrow ♪ 1868 01:40:22,588 --> 01:40:26,421 ♪ All the time you know she's smilin' ♪ 1869 01:40:26,505 --> 01:40:30,005 ♪ You'll be on your knees tomorrow ♪ 1870 01:40:30,088 --> 01:40:34,963 ♪ Yeah, you go back, Jack, do it again ♪ 1871 01:40:35,046 --> 01:40:38,171 ♪ Wheel turnin' round and round ♪ 1872 01:40:38,255 --> 01:40:42,296 ♪ You go back, Jack, do it again ♪ 1873 01:40:44,255 --> 01:40:46,255 ♪ ♪ 1874 01:41:16,171 --> 01:41:18,171 ♪ ♪ 1875 01:41:47,713 --> 01:41:49,630 ♪ ♪ 1876 01:42:19,630 --> 01:42:21,630 ♪ ♪ 1877 01:42:29,880 --> 01:42:33,671 ♪ Now you swear and kick and beg us ♪ 1878 01:42:33,755 --> 01:42:37,713 ♪ That you're not a gambling man ♪ 1879 01:42:37,796 --> 01:42:41,296 ♪ Then you find you're back in Vegas ♪ 1880 01:42:41,380 --> 01:42:45,296 ♪ With a handle in your hand ♪ 1881 01:42:45,380 --> 01:42:49,088 ♪ Your black cards can make you money ♪ 1882 01:42:49,171 --> 01:42:52,755 ♪ So you hide them when you're able ♪ 1883 01:42:52,838 --> 01:42:56,546 ♪ In the land of milk and honey ♪ 1884 01:42:56,630 --> 01:43:00,213 ♪ You must put them on the table ♪ 1885 01:43:00,296 --> 01:43:05,713 ♪ Yeah, you go back, Jack, do it again ♪ 1886 01:43:05,796 --> 01:43:08,421 ♪ Wheel turnin' round and round ♪ 1887 01:43:08,505 --> 01:43:13,380 ♪ You go back, Jack, do it again. ♪ 1888 01:43:13,463 --> 01:43:15,463 ♪ ♪ 1889 01:43:37,505 --> 01:43:39,505 (song fades) 1890 01:43:39,588 --> 01:43:41,588 ♪ ♪ 1891 01:44:11,588 --> 01:44:13,588 ♪ ♪ 1892 01:44:43,588 --> 01:44:45,588 ♪ ♪ 1893 01:45:15,588 --> 01:45:17,588 ♪ ♪ 1894 01:45:36,630 --> 01:45:38,630 (music ends)