1 00:00:02,785 --> 00:00:04,091 -Previously onThe Last Man on Earth... -Please don't shoot me. 2 00:00:04,134 --> 00:00:05,962 -Please don't. -You're mine now. -Glenn, how long 3 00:00:06,006 --> 00:00:08,138 -have you been on this island? -About five years. 4 00:00:08,182 --> 00:00:09,531 Is there something you're not telling me? 5 00:00:09,574 --> 00:00:12,664 There was a horrible virus, and we're all that's left. 6 00:00:12,708 --> 00:00:15,232 -Carol! -Tandy! [laughs] 7 00:00:15,276 --> 00:00:16,451 GLENN: You guys just gonna leave her here? 8 00:00:16,494 --> 00:00:18,061 CAROL: Fine, she can come. 9 00:00:18,105 --> 00:00:19,671 But on one condition. 10 00:00:19,715 --> 00:00:21,891 Thank you! You won't regret this! 11 00:00:25,329 --> 00:00:27,549 And you're done. 12 00:00:27,592 --> 00:00:29,551 Ah. Great. Whew! 13 00:00:29,594 --> 00:00:32,075 Wow, that feels wonderful. Thank you. 14 00:00:32,119 --> 00:00:33,468 So, how much longer till we get there? 15 00:00:33,511 --> 00:00:36,079 Uh, well, at this speed, probably about a week. 16 00:00:36,123 --> 00:00:38,081 -Seriously? -What? Shut up. -Why? -I would like 17 00:00:38,125 --> 00:00:40,692 to get there faster, but, to do that safely, 18 00:00:40,736 --> 00:00:43,260 you're gonna have to rethink the Pamela situation. 19 00:00:43,304 --> 00:00:45,349 Oh, God. Help me. 20 00:00:45,393 --> 00:00:48,309 [squealing]: Help me, God. Oh, God. Oh... 21 00:00:48,352 --> 00:00:50,963 Pamela stays right where she is. 22 00:00:51,007 --> 00:00:53,357 Yeah, we have a saying: you do the crime, you do the time. 23 00:00:53,401 --> 00:00:55,142 GAIL: Damn it, y'all. 24 00:00:55,185 --> 00:00:57,144 I left my sunglasses back on the island. 25 00:00:57,187 --> 00:00:58,580 Can we go back? 26 00:00:58,623 --> 00:01:00,712 Just get some new ones in Mexico. 27 00:01:00,756 --> 00:01:02,366 No, they were my faves. 28 00:01:02,410 --> 00:01:04,019 I know right where I left them. 29 00:01:04,063 --> 00:01:07,023 They are right over there. 30 00:01:08,720 --> 00:01:10,679 Oh, balls. 31 00:01:10,722 --> 00:01:12,724 Let me see those. 32 00:01:17,033 --> 00:01:20,341 Uh, you know what, maybe we should head back. 33 00:01:20,384 --> 00:01:24,780 PAMELA: Oh, oh, no! [screaming] 34 00:01:24,823 --> 00:01:27,130 GLENN: Man overboard! 35 00:01:30,525 --> 00:01:32,483 [Pamela groans] 36 00:01:32,527 --> 00:01:34,006 Hello. 37 00:01:34,050 --> 00:01:37,009 Sorry, I lost my grip when my fingers went numb. 38 00:01:37,053 --> 00:01:40,012 Oh, the same fingers that adult-napped my husband? 39 00:01:40,056 --> 00:01:41,536 Back in the raft. 40 00:01:41,579 --> 00:01:44,277 Guys, I know you have your little punishment policy... 41 00:01:44,321 --> 00:01:45,757 -DTC, DTT. -But, uh, 42 00:01:45,801 --> 00:01:48,630 I think we'd move a lot faster if Pamela could ride with us. 43 00:01:48,673 --> 00:01:50,632 Oh, ho, ho. 44 00:01:50,675 --> 00:01:52,547 You'd like that, wouldn't you? 45 00:01:52,590 --> 00:01:54,201 I would. I really would. 46 00:01:54,244 --> 00:01:55,593 GAIL: Look, Carol, I'm still pissed at her, too, 47 00:01:55,637 --> 00:01:57,769 but I'm dying to get off this damn boat, 48 00:01:57,813 --> 00:02:01,208 so maybe we should just bite the bullet on this one. 49 00:02:01,251 --> 00:02:02,339 MELISSA: Yeah, I mean, we shouldn't all have to suffer 50 00:02:02,383 --> 00:02:03,949 because Pamela sucks. 51 00:02:03,993 --> 00:02:04,950 Right? 52 00:02:04,994 --> 00:02:06,256 ERICA: Carol, what do you say? 53 00:02:06,300 --> 00:02:08,562 [sighs] 54 00:02:08,606 --> 00:02:10,217 Fine. 55 00:02:10,259 --> 00:02:12,436 But just know that you're on thin ice, 56 00:02:12,480 --> 00:02:14,438 and I'm holding a welding torch. 57 00:02:14,482 --> 00:02:15,570 [mimics torch] 58 00:02:15,613 --> 00:02:17,398 Thank you. Thank you so much. 59 00:02:17,441 --> 00:02:18,834 I know I have behaved terribly, 60 00:02:18,877 --> 00:02:21,010 and I promise I will earn my place on this boat. 61 00:02:21,053 --> 00:02:23,360 I will be the lowest of the lows. The waitstaff. 62 00:02:23,404 --> 00:02:25,057 So, Todd, you're excused. 63 00:02:25,101 --> 00:02:27,364 Prepare to be pampered! 64 00:02:27,408 --> 00:02:29,801 You gave me a second chance! I'm not gonna waste it! 65 00:02:29,845 --> 00:02:31,454 A-And don't worry! I-I know what to do! 66 00:02:31,499 --> 00:02:33,457 I had one of me once! 67 00:02:33,501 --> 00:02:35,503 [shivering] 68 00:02:36,852 --> 00:02:39,289 TODD [as Red]: Zihuatanejo. 69 00:02:39,333 --> 00:02:41,813 Oh, man, just wait till you see it. 70 00:02:41,857 --> 00:02:44,033 They say the boardwalk is a must-see 71 00:02:44,076 --> 00:02:46,775 for locals and tourists alike. 72 00:02:46,817 --> 00:02:49,473 The perfect spot for our honeymoon. 73 00:02:49,517 --> 00:02:51,345 [as Andy]: But let's promise not to talk like this 74 00:02:51,388 --> 00:02:52,824 when we're making love. 75 00:02:52,868 --> 00:02:56,088 Oh, you know I can't make that promise, Andy. 76 00:02:56,132 --> 00:02:58,874 Hi. Well, I just finished cleaning the anchor. 77 00:02:58,917 --> 00:03:01,833 Would anyone care for a dinnertime foot massage? 78 00:03:01,877 --> 00:03:04,271 Todd? Melissa? No? 79 00:03:04,314 --> 00:03:06,142 -Tandy? -Uh, uh... 80 00:03:06,186 --> 00:03:07,274 Oh, no. 81 00:03:07,317 --> 00:03:08,840 No? Carol, how 'bout you? 82 00:03:08,884 --> 00:03:10,712 No? Hard no? 83 00:03:10,755 --> 00:03:12,670 Gail? That's a no. 84 00:03:12,714 --> 00:03:14,063 Erica? [Australian accent]: No. 85 00:03:14,106 --> 00:03:15,325 Okay. 86 00:03:15,369 --> 00:03:17,240 Jasper? You? 87 00:03:17,284 --> 00:03:19,503 No? Glenn? 88 00:03:19,547 --> 00:03:20,896 You good? Feet good? 89 00:03:20,939 --> 00:03:24,639 Any kind of massage-- Swedish, Shiatsu, Thai? 90 00:03:24,682 --> 00:03:27,381 Rolfing? Anyone want to get Rolfed? 91 00:03:27,424 --> 00:03:29,383 Hot stone massage? 92 00:03:29,426 --> 00:03:30,297 Cold stone? 93 00:03:30,340 --> 00:03:32,081 Cold Stone Creamery? [chuckles] 94 00:03:32,124 --> 00:03:33,865 Would anyone like a cup of cream? 95 00:03:33,909 --> 00:03:36,868 Couples massage? Erica, Gail, couples massage? 96 00:03:36,912 --> 00:03:38,870 Glenn, Jasper, couples massage? 97 00:03:38,914 --> 00:03:40,437 Okay, just circling back. 98 00:03:40,481 --> 00:03:41,873 Melissa? No? 99 00:03:41,917 --> 00:03:44,093 Todd? No. 100 00:03:44,136 --> 00:03:45,529 Tandy? Jasper? No? 101 00:03:45,573 --> 00:03:46,530 Carol? 102 00:03:46,574 --> 00:03:48,663 Definite no. Gail? 103 00:03:48,706 --> 00:03:50,273 Hard no. Erica? 104 00:03:50,317 --> 00:03:51,274 All right. 105 00:03:51,317 --> 00:03:54,146 Glenn, still good? 106 00:03:54,190 --> 00:03:56,410 Okay, well, I'm off to scrub the decks. 107 00:03:56,453 --> 00:03:58,542 [chuckles] If you change your mind, please wash your feet. 108 00:03:58,586 --> 00:04:00,544 No, leave them dirty. 109 00:04:00,588 --> 00:04:02,590 I deserve it. 110 00:04:04,940 --> 00:04:07,899 How long are we gonna let her prostrate herself like this? 111 00:04:07,943 --> 00:04:09,336 GAIL: I don't know. 112 00:04:09,379 --> 00:04:11,990 How long was she gonna leave us on that damn island? 113 00:04:12,034 --> 00:04:13,557 -Yeah. -CAROL: I still don't trust her. 114 00:04:13,601 --> 00:04:15,907 You all saw how she casually offered my husband 115 00:04:15,951 --> 00:04:17,560 a foot massage. 116 00:04:17,605 --> 00:04:21,696 Everybody knows that the foot is the gateway to the leg. 117 00:04:21,738 --> 00:04:24,568 ERICA: Yeah, she's bad news. 118 00:04:35,144 --> 00:04:36,711 Oh, do you want me to warm that for you? 119 00:04:36,754 --> 00:04:39,148 No, I want you to eat it. 120 00:04:39,191 --> 00:04:40,497 Eat it for you? 121 00:04:40,541 --> 00:04:41,933 Like bird-feed you? 122 00:04:41,977 --> 00:04:44,327 No, it's for you. 123 00:04:44,371 --> 00:04:46,329 Oh. 124 00:04:46,373 --> 00:04:49,376 Thank you. 125 00:04:49,419 --> 00:04:50,725 ♪ 126 00:04:50,768 --> 00:04:52,379 No, it was a very simple e-mail. 127 00:04:52,422 --> 00:04:55,338 It was just theó_pope@gmail. 128 00:04:55,382 --> 00:04:56,296 [both chuckle] 129 00:04:57,993 --> 00:04:59,951 Thank you again for the meal. 130 00:04:59,995 --> 00:05:02,432 -You're a really good cook. -Oh. 131 00:05:02,476 --> 00:05:06,741 I was a single dad, so I kind of know my way around a can opener. 132 00:05:06,784 --> 00:05:08,612 You have... 133 00:05:08,656 --> 00:05:10,745 had... 134 00:05:10,788 --> 00:05:14,531 Tell me about your kids. 135 00:05:14,575 --> 00:05:16,359 [sighs]: Oh. 136 00:05:16,403 --> 00:05:18,056 A girl, Penny. 137 00:05:18,100 --> 00:05:21,190 Two boys, uh, Tommy and Doug. 138 00:05:21,233 --> 00:05:22,496 Good kids. 139 00:05:22,539 --> 00:05:24,498 Smart. 140 00:05:24,541 --> 00:05:25,977 Two gay, one not. 141 00:05:26,021 --> 00:05:27,544 Oh. 142 00:05:27,588 --> 00:05:29,024 Apples of my eye. 143 00:05:32,027 --> 00:05:35,639 It's... pretty risky for you to be talking to me. 144 00:05:35,683 --> 00:05:37,641 I'm kind of toxic around here. 145 00:05:37,685 --> 00:05:40,644 If someone comes, you should just start barking orders at me. 146 00:05:40,688 --> 00:05:42,646 I'll know it's not really you. [chuckles] 147 00:05:42,690 --> 00:05:45,562 I'm not worried about what they think. 148 00:05:47,564 --> 00:05:50,175 Why are you so nice to me? 149 00:05:50,219 --> 00:05:54,484 I know what it's like to be alone for years. 150 00:05:54,528 --> 00:05:57,661 It can make you do some pretty crazy things. 151 00:05:57,705 --> 00:06:00,795 I made a lover out of palm fronds. 152 00:06:00,838 --> 00:06:02,274 -Oh. -[chuckles] 153 00:06:02,318 --> 00:06:06,104 Anyway, I'm really in no position to judge. 154 00:06:06,148 --> 00:06:08,106 Wow. If this was the old me, I would have you pinned 155 00:06:08,150 --> 00:06:09,673 against that railing right now, 156 00:06:09,717 --> 00:06:13,155 slick and wet with slobber. 157 00:06:15,113 --> 00:06:17,507 But, you know, that was the past. 158 00:06:17,551 --> 00:06:19,117 We're not those people anymore. 159 00:06:19,161 --> 00:06:20,684 We've-we've changed. 160 00:06:20,728 --> 00:06:21,816 Changed. 161 00:06:21,859 --> 00:06:23,600 -Oh. -Mmm. 162 00:06:23,644 --> 00:06:25,646 [both moaning] 163 00:06:25,689 --> 00:06:27,648 [both moaning loudly] 164 00:06:27,691 --> 00:06:29,780 -This is us! Oh! -Oh, God! 165 00:06:29,824 --> 00:06:32,914 -You're a real woman! Oh! -Release my breasts! 166 00:06:32,957 --> 00:06:34,655 -GLENN: Whoa, that's in play? -PAMELA: Whoa. Wow. 167 00:06:38,746 --> 00:06:40,487 Good morning. 168 00:06:40,530 --> 00:06:41,836 Does anyone need their hair combed? 169 00:06:41,879 --> 00:06:43,228 [chuckles] 170 00:06:43,272 --> 00:06:45,622 We can comb our own hair, thank you. 171 00:06:45,666 --> 00:06:48,146 -Right. I'm sorry for asking. -Hey, Pamela, 172 00:06:48,190 --> 00:06:50,932 do you know who was making all that racket last night? 173 00:06:50,975 --> 00:06:54,109 'Cause it sure sounded like you and Glenn. 174 00:06:55,110 --> 00:06:56,851 Me and Glenn. 175 00:06:56,894 --> 00:06:59,027 Last night. Yes. 176 00:06:59,070 --> 00:07:02,117 Glenn had me doing some really loud chores 177 00:07:02,160 --> 00:07:03,466 all night long. 178 00:07:03,510 --> 00:07:04,859 Real hard labor. 179 00:07:04,902 --> 00:07:07,514 Um, and we just both collapsed from exhaustion-- 180 00:07:07,557 --> 00:07:10,691 I mean, him from the ordering and me from all the choring. 181 00:07:10,734 --> 00:07:14,564 Then, at dawn, he woke me for one final chore session. 182 00:07:14,608 --> 00:07:18,481 I mean, he has the stamina of... 183 00:07:18,525 --> 00:07:20,918 someone who really likes to... 184 00:07:20,962 --> 00:07:23,051 order a lot of chores. 185 00:07:23,094 --> 00:07:26,097 He can find lots of things for me to do. 186 00:07:26,141 --> 00:07:27,751 Well, if you were just doing chores, 187 00:07:27,795 --> 00:07:29,405 then why did you keep screaming, 188 00:07:29,449 --> 00:07:33,757 "Wow! Wow! Wow!"? 189 00:07:33,801 --> 00:07:37,065 Because he showed me how to use the ShamWow. 190 00:07:37,108 --> 00:07:39,763 [laughing]: And I sometimes have a habit of 191 00:07:39,807 --> 00:07:41,852 saying the name of the thing that I'm using. 192 00:07:41,896 --> 00:07:44,855 You know, like, comb, comb, deodorant, toilet. [chuckles] 193 00:07:44,899 --> 00:07:47,771 -Well, next time, keep a lid on it. -I will, I promise. 194 00:07:47,815 --> 00:07:49,338 I will bite a pillow, a leather belt. 195 00:07:49,381 --> 00:07:51,383 I'll put one of those black balls in my mouth. 196 00:07:51,427 --> 00:07:54,299 [laughs] Anything I can do to earn your forgiveness. 197 00:07:54,343 --> 00:07:56,214 All right, back to work! 198 00:08:02,177 --> 00:08:03,657 [gasps] Oh. 199 00:08:03,700 --> 00:08:05,572 Glenn, what if someone see us? 200 00:08:05,615 --> 00:08:08,879 Hey, come with me. 201 00:08:08,923 --> 00:08:11,534 -Where are we going? -They're having a little party. 202 00:08:11,578 --> 00:08:13,667 Glenn, I wasn't invited. 203 00:08:13,710 --> 00:08:16,800 Hey, if I can't bring my girlfriend, 204 00:08:16,844 --> 00:08:19,586 then it's a party I don't want to go. 205 00:08:19,629 --> 00:08:20,935 Girlfriend? 206 00:08:20,978 --> 00:08:23,241 Is that okay? 207 00:08:23,285 --> 00:08:25,635 Of course. [giggles] 208 00:08:27,507 --> 00:08:31,423 ALL: ♪ That kind of music just soothes the soul♪ 209 00:08:31,467 --> 00:08:35,427 ♪ I reminisce about the days of old♪ 210 00:08:35,471 --> 00:08:38,692 ♪ With that old time rock and roll♪ 211 00:08:38,735 --> 00:08:43,479 ♪ Still like that old time rock and roll♪ 212 00:08:43,523 --> 00:08:45,263 TANDY: ♪ Kind of music just♪ 213 00:08:45,307 --> 00:08:46,917 ♪ Soothes the soul♪ 214 00:08:46,961 --> 00:08:50,834 ♪ I reminisce about the days before...♪ 215 00:08:50,878 --> 00:08:52,270 Why is everybody stopping? 216 00:08:52,314 --> 00:08:55,491 ♪ That old time...♪ [sings gibberish] 217 00:08:55,535 --> 00:08:57,711 Oh. Oh. 218 00:08:57,754 --> 00:08:59,408 GLENN: I have something to say, 219 00:08:59,451 --> 00:09:01,366 and I want you all to hear it. 220 00:09:01,410 --> 00:09:03,064 JASPER: Land! 221 00:09:06,981 --> 00:09:08,852 TODD: There she is-- 222 00:09:08,896 --> 00:09:11,463 beautiful Zihuatanejo. 223 00:09:11,507 --> 00:09:13,596 You ever seen a beach like that? 224 00:09:13,640 --> 00:09:16,164 The sand is so white. 225 00:09:16,207 --> 00:09:18,166 Uh, Todd... 226 00:09:18,209 --> 00:09:20,342 that's not sand. 227 00:09:41,711 --> 00:09:43,844 [dog growling] 228 00:09:55,682 --> 00:09:57,553 I know. It's a lot to take in. 229 00:09:57,597 --> 00:09:59,250 You okay? 230 00:10:02,166 --> 00:10:05,387 Go... get... my bags. 231 00:10:06,388 --> 00:10:08,520 What? 232 00:10:08,564 --> 00:10:10,479 My bags. Now! 233 00:10:10,522 --> 00:10:12,133 But I-I-I... 234 00:10:12,176 --> 00:10:13,830 My bags! 235 00:10:19,357 --> 00:10:21,359 [voice breaking]: My bags... 236 00:10:28,715 --> 00:10:31,369 TODD: Oh, talk about paradise. [laughs] 237 00:10:31,413 --> 00:10:33,937 Yeah. You know, as Red once said, 238 00:10:33,981 --> 00:10:37,724 "I hope the Pacific is as blue as it has been in my dreams." 239 00:10:37,767 --> 00:10:39,726 News flash-- it's bluer. 240 00:10:39,769 --> 00:10:42,903 Yup, yup. I mean, this is even better than I pictured it. 241 00:10:42,946 --> 00:10:46,863 Oh, yeah. Yeah. 242 00:10:47,864 --> 00:10:49,736 Your bags, sir! 243 00:10:49,779 --> 00:10:51,825 [quietly]: I see you took my advice. 244 00:10:51,868 --> 00:10:54,392 Treat me like dog dirt so the others don't find out about us. 245 00:10:54,436 --> 00:10:58,048 You're being very believable, which I find very sexy. 246 00:10:58,092 --> 00:10:59,746 Please wait by the road. 247 00:10:59,789 --> 00:11:01,138 Very well, sir! 248 00:11:01,182 --> 00:11:03,271 Oh, you're so hard on me. 249 00:11:03,314 --> 00:11:05,708 You couldn't care less about me. 250 00:11:05,752 --> 00:11:07,667 Work, work, work. 251 00:11:10,887 --> 00:11:12,410 PAMELA: Hey. 252 00:11:12,454 --> 00:11:14,412 The coast is clear. 253 00:11:14,456 --> 00:11:16,414 [as Austin Powers]: You want to shag, baby? 254 00:11:16,458 --> 00:11:18,939 [laughs] Austin Powers. 255 00:11:18,982 --> 00:11:20,767 All right, that'll be all. 256 00:11:20,810 --> 00:11:22,420 Run along. 257 00:11:22,464 --> 00:11:24,422 Oh. You're a very good actor. 258 00:11:24,466 --> 00:11:25,815 Really committing to this role. 259 00:11:25,859 --> 00:11:28,644 -It's not a role. -Oh. 260 00:11:28,688 --> 00:11:30,646 Sorry, part. Performance? 261 00:11:30,690 --> 00:11:33,518 Act. I meant act. Role? 262 00:11:33,562 --> 00:11:35,738 This is real. I made a mistake. 263 00:11:35,782 --> 00:11:37,914 Now please just go. 264 00:11:41,135 --> 00:11:43,267 [voice breaking]: Very well, sir. 265 00:11:45,443 --> 00:11:48,664 -So, obviously, we need a home. -Uh-huh. 266 00:11:48,708 --> 00:11:51,928 And I saw this place, and I was like, "Yes, please." 267 00:11:51,972 --> 00:11:54,235 -Ready? -Yeah. 268 00:11:54,278 --> 00:11:56,759 Ta-da! 269 00:11:56,803 --> 00:11:59,327 What do you think? 270 00:11:59,370 --> 00:12:00,937 Huh. 271 00:12:00,981 --> 00:12:03,113 CAROL: I-I know. 272 00:12:03,157 --> 00:12:05,028 It's an upper-from-which-fixer, 273 00:12:05,072 --> 00:12:07,814 but it has medical stuff for when I go into labor. 274 00:12:07,857 --> 00:12:11,469 -And I have so many decorating ideas. -Oh. 275 00:12:11,513 --> 00:12:13,994 I mean, first of all-- no brainer-- 276 00:12:14,037 --> 00:12:15,996 get the dead bodies out of here. 277 00:12:16,039 --> 00:12:19,173 Think we might have gone to the same decorating school. 278 00:12:19,216 --> 00:12:20,827 Next, we need a statement piece. 279 00:12:20,870 --> 00:12:22,829 My idea? 280 00:12:22,872 --> 00:12:24,395 A bedpathelier. 281 00:12:24,439 --> 00:12:27,790 You're probably way ahead of me on this, but it's a chandelier 282 00:12:27,834 --> 00:12:30,053 made out of bedpans... 283 00:12:30,097 --> 00:12:31,881 and catheters. 284 00:12:31,925 --> 00:12:33,056 [Carol chuckles] 285 00:12:33,100 --> 00:12:35,493 Then, we take these sheets, 286 00:12:35,537 --> 00:12:37,713 bleach out the stool and the blood, 287 00:12:37,757 --> 00:12:39,889 and we're in picture window city. 288 00:12:39,933 --> 00:12:42,065 [laughing]: It is gonna be so... 289 00:12:44,981 --> 00:12:46,853 ...great. 290 00:12:46,896 --> 00:12:49,072 This is what I love about you, Carol. 291 00:12:49,116 --> 00:12:50,639 I mean, you see potential 292 00:12:50,682 --> 00:12:52,859 in even the biggest pile of crap. 293 00:12:52,902 --> 00:12:55,513 -I don't know about that. -Well, I do. 294 00:12:55,557 --> 00:12:57,689 'Cause I'm saying that as a former pile. 295 00:12:57,733 --> 00:12:59,082 Look, I love it. 296 00:12:59,126 --> 00:13:00,431 I am in so hard. 297 00:13:00,475 --> 00:13:01,737 [stammers] So where do we start? 298 00:13:01,781 --> 00:13:06,046 Well, I think I want to start in the courtyard. 299 00:13:06,089 --> 00:13:08,962 And if it's okay, 300 00:13:09,005 --> 00:13:11,312 I need to do this one on my own. 301 00:13:19,146 --> 00:13:22,192 You know what? I want to make a toast. 302 00:13:22,236 --> 00:13:25,413 Thank you, Zihuatanejo, 303 00:13:25,456 --> 00:13:28,720 for making me "see what an A-ho" 304 00:13:28,764 --> 00:13:32,115 I've been for not getting here sooner. 305 00:13:32,159 --> 00:13:33,682 But you know what? I'm here now. 306 00:13:33,725 --> 00:13:35,771 And talk about living up to the hype. 307 00:13:35,815 --> 00:13:38,121 I mean, come on. Will somebody pinch me, please? 308 00:13:38,165 --> 00:13:40,080 I mean, Melissa, please, pinch me, would you? 309 00:13:40,123 --> 00:13:42,125 -I'm not gonna pinch you. -Okay, well, then, 310 00:13:42,169 --> 00:13:44,040 I'm jumping on my own grenade here. 311 00:13:44,084 --> 00:13:46,695 It's just... [groans, laughs] 312 00:13:46,738 --> 00:13:49,567 [Todd groans and laughs loudly] 313 00:13:49,611 --> 00:13:51,352 No, it didn't work. 314 00:13:51,395 --> 00:13:53,136 It still feels like a dream. 315 00:13:53,180 --> 00:13:55,008 And not a dry one. 316 00:13:55,051 --> 00:13:56,313 -TODD: Oh. -GAIL: Oh. ERICA: Ew. 317 00:13:56,357 --> 00:13:59,229 I love this place! Shawshank lives! 318 00:13:59,273 --> 00:14:01,275 Yeah! 319 00:14:04,626 --> 00:14:06,715 Can we help you with something? 320 00:14:06,758 --> 00:14:08,456 PAMELA: Uh... 321 00:14:08,499 --> 00:14:10,893 I'm here for dinner. 322 00:14:10,937 --> 00:14:12,939 Well, this party is BYOB, 323 00:14:12,982 --> 00:14:15,898 which stands for, "Bye, You Old Buttface." 324 00:14:15,942 --> 00:14:19,249 I'll have you know, I was invited. 325 00:14:19,293 --> 00:14:21,730 Really? By who? 326 00:14:21,773 --> 00:14:23,775 By whom. 327 00:14:24,864 --> 00:14:26,648 [bell tolls] 328 00:14:28,998 --> 00:14:31,479 And that whom is me. 329 00:14:31,522 --> 00:14:35,396 Look, we all know that Pamela is a real jerk. 330 00:14:35,439 --> 00:14:37,006 Fair assessment. 331 00:14:37,050 --> 00:14:39,790 I mean, she kidnapped a person. She's a stinkin' felon. 332 00:14:39,835 --> 00:14:41,793 -I am, yes. -She left a new mom, 333 00:14:41,837 --> 00:14:44,274 a baby, a mother-to-be stranded on an island. 334 00:14:44,318 --> 00:14:46,059 -Left 'em for dead, yup. -She's just been 335 00:14:46,102 --> 00:14:48,496 horrible, irredeemable scum. 336 00:14:48,539 --> 00:14:50,933 Objection! Overruled. I'll allow it. 337 00:14:50,977 --> 00:14:52,543 -Even her dog hates her. -He does. 338 00:14:52,587 --> 00:14:54,850 In short, Pamela was a real 339 00:14:54,894 --> 00:14:57,853 piece of Sit Here In Tijuana. 340 00:14:57,897 --> 00:14:59,942 -Care Bear! -I'm sorry, Tandy. 341 00:14:59,986 --> 00:15:02,075 I know that coarse language isn't me, 342 00:15:02,118 --> 00:15:04,947 but neither is giving up on a person. 343 00:15:04,991 --> 00:15:08,168 And that is exactly what I did. 344 00:15:08,211 --> 00:15:10,213 It's what we all did. 345 00:15:10,257 --> 00:15:11,954 And that's not us. 346 00:15:11,998 --> 00:15:13,782 We can do better than that. 347 00:15:13,825 --> 00:15:17,177 And so can she. 348 00:15:17,220 --> 00:15:20,093 So what do you say we give her another chance? 349 00:15:23,009 --> 00:15:24,532 [clears throat] 350 00:15:24,575 --> 00:15:26,186 Pass. 351 00:15:26,229 --> 00:15:28,188 PAMELA: What is your problem? 352 00:15:28,231 --> 00:15:29,885 We had something. 353 00:15:29,929 --> 00:15:31,582 I felt it. 354 00:15:31,626 --> 00:15:33,367 I felt it on the bow. I felt it on the stern. 355 00:15:33,410 --> 00:15:35,064 Then a few more times on the bow. 356 00:15:35,108 --> 00:15:36,239 Then the stern again. 357 00:15:36,283 --> 00:15:38,328 Then you flipped me over on to my starboard side. 358 00:15:38,372 --> 00:15:40,374 I even tried aft for the first time. 359 00:15:40,417 --> 00:15:42,767 I know you felt it, too. 360 00:15:42,811 --> 00:15:45,466 You were just a vacation fling. 361 00:15:45,509 --> 00:15:47,076 What changed in you? 362 00:15:47,120 --> 00:15:49,122 Was it the sex? I've always been bad at it. 363 00:15:49,165 --> 00:15:50,253 Tentative, immobile. 364 00:15:50,297 --> 00:15:52,038 I need to learn to use my arms more. 365 00:15:52,081 --> 00:15:53,474 I just can't do this. 366 00:15:53,517 --> 00:15:55,128 Wait. Glenn. 367 00:15:55,171 --> 00:15:56,999 Tell me you don't feel anything. 368 00:15:57,043 --> 00:15:58,131 Go on, tell me. 369 00:15:58,174 --> 00:15:59,349 Tell me that, Glenn! 370 00:15:59,393 --> 00:16:00,568 Tell me you don't feel anything! 371 00:16:00,611 --> 00:16:01,830 Damn it, tell me! 372 00:16:03,310 --> 00:16:06,574 Why are you trying so hard to make me hate you? 373 00:16:06,617 --> 00:16:08,837 Because I love you. 374 00:16:08,880 --> 00:16:10,360 I love you, too. 375 00:16:10,404 --> 00:16:13,407 And I want to be with you for the rest of my life. 376 00:16:13,450 --> 00:16:15,496 So why are you treating me like this? 377 00:16:15,539 --> 00:16:17,977 Because I'm leaving tomorrow. 378 00:16:29,684 --> 00:16:31,947 PAMELA: So you're leaving. 379 00:16:36,560 --> 00:16:39,955 [sighs] Seeing that beach today, 380 00:16:39,999 --> 00:16:43,915 and what my kids went through without me... 381 00:16:43,959 --> 00:16:46,092 I have to go home. 382 00:16:46,135 --> 00:16:50,052 There's radiation everywhere. 383 00:16:50,096 --> 00:16:53,577 You know you'll probably die. 384 00:16:54,970 --> 00:16:57,364 They're my kids. 385 00:17:02,978 --> 00:17:05,981 So it wasn't our sex? 386 00:17:06,025 --> 00:17:09,157 Pamela. 387 00:17:09,202 --> 00:17:12,422 Our sex was the second best 388 00:17:12,465 --> 00:17:14,598 I've ever had. 389 00:17:16,992 --> 00:17:19,299 Oh, Glenn. 390 00:17:19,342 --> 00:17:22,040 I'll always remember that you said that. 391 00:17:33,052 --> 00:17:35,097 Oh, hey. 392 00:17:35,141 --> 00:17:37,491 Todd, I know you're not okay. 393 00:17:37,534 --> 00:17:40,363 I know Zihuat's not what you expected. 394 00:17:40,407 --> 00:17:42,365 But I think I know a way to help. 395 00:17:44,063 --> 00:17:47,240 You know the final scene of Shawshank? 396 00:17:47,283 --> 00:17:48,893 -Uh-huh. -Well, 397 00:17:48,937 --> 00:17:52,506 they didn't film that in Zihuatanejo. 398 00:17:52,549 --> 00:17:54,508 [laughs] 399 00:17:54,551 --> 00:17:56,510 Get out of town, okay? 400 00:17:56,553 --> 00:17:58,207 Go fishin'. 401 00:17:58,251 --> 00:18:01,297 They shot that in Saint Croix. 402 00:18:02,733 --> 00:18:04,474 Tax credits. 403 00:18:04,518 --> 00:18:05,867 [chuckles softly] 404 00:18:08,304 --> 00:18:09,740 Are you serious? 405 00:18:10,785 --> 00:18:11,960 Yeah. 406 00:18:12,003 --> 00:18:13,527 [quietly]: Boy, damn. 407 00:18:13,570 --> 00:18:16,834 Damn you, Zihuatanejo! 408 00:18:16,878 --> 00:18:18,140 You lied to me! 409 00:18:18,184 --> 00:18:20,577 All of you! 410 00:18:20,621 --> 00:18:24,712 The entire production team of The Shawshank Redemption. 411 00:18:24,755 --> 00:18:27,410 Cast, crew, 412 00:18:27,454 --> 00:18:29,282 [crying]: and most certainly locations, 413 00:18:29,325 --> 00:18:32,415 you've all got blood on your hands. 414 00:18:32,459 --> 00:18:34,548 Everyone. 415 00:18:38,204 --> 00:18:40,336 Everyone except for you. 416 00:18:44,297 --> 00:18:45,863 [sniffles] 417 00:18:45,907 --> 00:18:48,431 I'm sorry. I'm sorry for acting so crazy. 418 00:18:48,475 --> 00:18:50,999 I just, you know, I just... 419 00:18:51,042 --> 00:18:54,307 God, I just wanted it to be perfect for you. 420 00:18:54,350 --> 00:18:56,265 No. Don't you see, 421 00:18:56,309 --> 00:18:58,876 as long as I'm with you, any place is perfect. 422 00:19:07,320 --> 00:19:09,235 GLENN: Okay, well, 423 00:19:09,278 --> 00:19:11,193 I guess that's about it. 424 00:19:11,237 --> 00:19:13,630 Hey. 425 00:19:13,674 --> 00:19:17,199 Ta-ta for now, you hear? 426 00:19:17,243 --> 00:19:19,070 You guys haven't seen Pamela, have you? 427 00:19:19,114 --> 00:19:20,463 CAROL: Oh, Glenn, 428 00:19:20,507 --> 00:19:23,292 you have to understand, this is really hard for her. 429 00:19:23,336 --> 00:19:26,295 Well, just tell her I'm gonna miss her. 430 00:19:26,339 --> 00:19:28,079 PAMELA: No, you won't. 431 00:19:29,255 --> 00:19:30,473 What? 432 00:19:32,693 --> 00:19:34,999 I said, "No. You won't miss me." 433 00:19:35,043 --> 00:19:37,132 Well, of course I'm gonna miss you. How can you say that? 434 00:19:37,176 --> 00:19:38,916 And I won't miss you, either. 435 00:19:40,396 --> 00:19:42,355 'Cause I'm comin' with ya. 436 00:19:42,398 --> 00:19:44,052 -Ah, come on, Pamela. -No. 437 00:19:44,095 --> 00:19:46,402 Glenn. I'm not gonna let either one of us 438 00:19:46,446 --> 00:19:48,404 be alone anymore. 439 00:19:48,448 --> 00:19:51,668 I'm not gonna be able to talk you out of this, am I? 440 00:19:51,712 --> 00:19:55,324 Well... No, you won't. 441 00:19:55,368 --> 00:19:57,457 Well, then I'm not even gonna take the time to try. 442 00:19:57,500 --> 00:19:59,807 -Please don't. -I got better things to do. 443 00:19:59,850 --> 00:20:01,548 -It'll take up too much time. -[laughs] 444 00:20:03,158 --> 00:20:04,942 That was a fun exchange. 445 00:20:04,986 --> 00:20:06,466 Carol. 446 00:20:06,509 --> 00:20:08,250 I got you a little something. 447 00:20:08,294 --> 00:20:09,686 It's Latisse. 448 00:20:09,730 --> 00:20:11,514 Just a few dabs in the morning and Tandy's brows 449 00:20:11,558 --> 00:20:13,124 will be back in no time. 450 00:20:13,168 --> 00:20:14,430 It's a little sweaty. 451 00:20:15,736 --> 00:20:19,043 Thank you. 452 00:20:19,087 --> 00:20:20,480 PAMELA: Well, 453 00:20:20,523 --> 00:20:22,873 I didn't deserve your forgiveness, 454 00:20:22,917 --> 00:20:24,484 but you gave it to me anyway. 455 00:20:24,527 --> 00:20:28,052 I hope you know how much that changed me. 456 00:20:28,096 --> 00:20:29,532 Todd, my bags? 457 00:20:30,533 --> 00:20:31,926 Yeah, sure. 458 00:20:31,969 --> 00:20:33,406 PAMELA: Well, 459 00:20:33,449 --> 00:20:34,711 off to die. [laughs] 460 00:20:34,755 --> 00:20:37,148 I hope it's worth it. Those kids better be alive. 461 00:20:37,192 --> 00:20:38,933 They probably won't be; they'll be dead. 462 00:20:38,976 --> 00:20:41,675 But it's good to go in with low expectations. 463 00:20:41,718 --> 00:20:44,852 -That's why I love this woman. -[Pamela chuckles] 464 00:20:44,895 --> 00:20:46,332 -♪ -[engine starts] 465 00:20:51,946 --> 00:20:55,776 PAMELA: Bye. Jeremy says bye! 466 00:20:58,344 --> 00:20:59,954 It truly was 467 00:20:59,997 --> 00:21:03,349 a Shawshank Redemption. 468 00:21:36,251 --> 00:21:37,557 CHILDREN: Uncle Stinky. 469 00:21:37,600 --> 00:21:39,210 [horn honking] 470 00:21:39,254 --> 00:21:41,212 Captioned by Media Access Group at WGBH