1
00:00:00,338 --> 00:00:01,381
Oh, right.
2
00:00:01,464 --> 00:00:03,259
Well, just tell whoever, then.
3
00:00:03,341 --> 00:00:04,509
Haaah!
4
00:00:04,593 --> 00:00:06,595
Ooh!
5
00:00:08,513 --> 00:00:10,807
Asshole!
6
00:00:10,891 --> 00:00:13,310
Anyway, I'm off to
Malibu to see Herb Kazzaz.
7
00:00:13,393 --> 00:00:15,645
He has cancer, which, as
you know, is a whole thing.
8
00:00:15,729 --> 00:00:17,856
Plus, he hates me, so I could really use
9
00:00:17,940 --> 00:00:19,566
some good news at the end of the day.
10
00:00:19,649 --> 00:00:21,235
Oh, my God. You're going to see Herb?
11
00:00:21,318 --> 00:00:23,279
You must be really... Nope.
12
00:00:23,361 --> 00:00:25,781
Don't care. Not interested.
13
00:00:25,864 --> 00:00:27,783
Okay, Good talk.
14
00:00:28,325 --> 00:00:29,743
Hey.
15
00:00:30,368 --> 00:00:31,536
- Ready for this?
- Listen.
16
00:00:31,620 --> 00:00:32,621
I want to make sure I don't spend
17
00:00:32,704 --> 00:00:34,414
any time alone with Herb.
18
00:00:34,497 --> 00:00:36,125
I'm bringing you along as my buffer.
19
00:00:36,208 --> 00:00:37,375
And your memoirist.
20
00:00:37,459 --> 00:00:38,460
I should meet your old best friend
21
00:00:38,543 --> 00:00:39,836
before he dies of cancer.
22
00:00:39,920 --> 00:00:40,921
Fine, I guess.
23
00:00:41,004 --> 00:00:42,172
Just don't abandon me.
24
00:00:42,256 --> 00:00:43,465
No bathroom breaks.
25
00:00:43,548 --> 00:00:44,967
And don't slip out of the room
26
00:00:45,050 --> 00:00:48,178
to text your fiancé a
bunch of winky smileys
27
00:00:48,262 --> 00:00:50,764
with hearts next to them... Gross.
28
00:00:50,847 --> 00:00:52,724
Congratulations on the
whole being engaged thing,
29
00:00:52,808 --> 00:00:54,017
- by the way.
- Thanks.
30
00:00:54,101 --> 00:00:55,435
It's just starting to hit me.
31
00:00:55,518 --> 00:00:57,146
I'm getting married.
32
00:00:57,229 --> 00:00:58,939
Thank God I don't have to die alone.
33
00:00:59,022 --> 00:01:00,149
- No offense.
- None taken.
34
00:01:00,232 --> 00:01:01,775
Till you said, "No offense."
35
00:01:01,858 --> 00:01:03,986
So what's the deal with you and this guy?
36
00:01:04,069 --> 00:01:05,403
You never talk about him.
37
00:01:05,487 --> 00:01:08,824
Well, I kind of, maybe
stabbed him in the back.
38
00:01:08,907 --> 00:01:11,451
Yeah, it's a bit of a story.
39
00:01:11,534 --> 00:01:16,414
A story of power, betrayal,
and ambitious hairstyles.
40
00:01:16,498 --> 00:01:18,000
The year? 198...
41
00:01:18,083 --> 00:01:20,336
- Movie's over.
- Watch the next one.
42
00:01:20,418 --> 00:01:24,089
Aw, I'm tired of watching movies.
43
00:01:24,173 --> 00:01:26,008
- Do you want to play a game?
- Sure.
44
00:01:26,091 --> 00:01:28,760
I spy with my little eye someone who needs
45
00:01:28,844 --> 00:01:30,095
to shut the hell up.
46
00:01:30,179 --> 00:01:32,181
- Is it me?
- It's always you.
47
00:01:32,264 --> 00:01:33,682
- Now, where was I?
- You were about to tell
48
00:01:33,765 --> 00:01:35,267
a story about you being a shitty friend,
49
00:01:35,351 --> 00:01:37,560
but then, we got interrupted
by you yelling at Todd.
50
00:01:37,644 --> 00:01:39,855
Oh, yeah. Shut up, Todd.
51
00:01:46,271 --> 00:01:51,106
Synced by emmasan
www.addic7ed.com
52
00:02:35,911 --> 00:02:38,455
♪ Generic '80s new wave ♪
53
00:02:38,538 --> 00:02:40,416
♪ Beep, bop, beep, bop, beep, bop ♪
54
00:02:40,498 --> 00:02:44,086
♪ This is a song from the '80s ♪
55
00:02:44,169 --> 00:02:48,090
♪ The decade which it currently is ♪
56
00:02:48,173 --> 00:02:51,509
Why do we need a kitchen and a bathroom?
57
00:02:51,593 --> 00:02:53,429
Pipes are pipes, people.
58
00:02:53,511 --> 00:02:56,390
Do we really need a toilet and a sink
59
00:02:56,473 --> 00:02:58,975
and a bathtub and... Wait, hold on...
60
00:02:59,059 --> 00:03:01,603
A whole 'nother room with another sink?
61
00:03:01,686 --> 00:03:02,896
They're all just holes to the ocean, lady.
62
00:03:02,979 --> 00:03:04,189
I mean, come on.
63
00:03:05,774 --> 00:03:07,192
BoJack, you're late.
64
00:03:07,276 --> 00:03:08,902
Here. I got you a beer. It's on the house.
65
00:03:08,985 --> 00:03:10,487
Don't tell my boss.
66
00:03:10,570 --> 00:03:12,281
Thanks, Charlotte, but
one beer gets me tipsy.
67
00:03:12,364 --> 00:03:13,907
I got to be clear-headed for my set.
68
00:03:13,990 --> 00:03:15,451
Looks like Herb's killing.
69
00:03:15,533 --> 00:03:17,827
Yeah, and the suits from ABC are here.
70
00:03:18,995 --> 00:03:20,456
Look. They're nodding.
71
00:03:20,538 --> 00:03:22,249
That's the executive version of laughing.
72
00:03:22,332 --> 00:03:24,876
Wow. They must be serious about Herb.
73
00:03:24,960 --> 00:03:26,836
That's Angela Diaz.
74
00:03:26,920 --> 00:03:28,755
She's the woman who made pantsuits a thing.
75
00:03:28,838 --> 00:03:29,839
Oh, before I forget.
76
00:03:29,923 --> 00:03:31,383
Herb and I are gonna see
77
00:03:31,467 --> 00:03:32,550
Back to the Future again this weekend.
78
00:03:32,634 --> 00:03:33,885
- Want to come?
- I'm in.
79
00:03:33,969 --> 00:03:35,471
That movie was amazing,
80
00:03:35,553 --> 00:03:37,222
except for all the lame time period jokes.
81
00:03:37,306 --> 00:03:39,099
We get it. The '50s were different.
82
00:03:39,182 --> 00:03:40,934
I'll have a New Coke, please.
83
00:03:41,017 --> 00:03:43,645
Listen, you guys don't need
to include me on your dates.
84
00:03:43,728 --> 00:03:46,148
Sometimes, it makes me
feel like a third wheel.
85
00:03:46,231 --> 00:03:47,232
BoJack, stop.
86
00:03:47,316 --> 00:03:48,442
Without the third wheel,
87
00:03:48,525 --> 00:03:49,985
how would you ride a tricycle?
88
00:03:50,068 --> 00:03:51,320
Wouldn't that make it a bicycle?
89
00:03:51,403 --> 00:03:52,529
Herb Kazzaz, ladies and gentlemen.
90
00:03:53,822 --> 00:03:55,407
- Hey-ooh!
- Great set, man.
91
00:03:55,491 --> 00:03:57,117
It's like everything you said was something
92
00:03:57,200 --> 00:03:59,495
I've thought before but
never had the balls to say.
93
00:03:59,577 --> 00:04:01,121
Thanks, BJ. I set 'em up.
94
00:04:01,204 --> 00:04:02,580
Now, you knock 'em down.
95
00:04:02,664 --> 00:04:05,125
Let's give it up for BoJack Horseman.
96
00:04:05,208 --> 00:04:07,794
Well, thank you, Bubbles.
97
00:04:07,877 --> 00:04:09,838
I love L.A. Don't you guys?
98
00:04:09,921 --> 00:04:12,341
The prettiest girls in the
world flock to this city,
99
00:04:12,424 --> 00:04:13,967
and they end up with total knobs.
100
00:04:14,050 --> 00:04:15,302
Take this couple, for example.
101
00:04:16,678 --> 00:04:18,555
Excuse me, miss. Is that your date?
102
00:04:18,638 --> 00:04:20,098
He's my husband.
103
00:04:20,182 --> 00:04:21,933
That's your husband? You can do better.
104
00:04:22,017 --> 00:04:23,477
Give me a call after the show.
105
00:04:23,560 --> 00:04:26,396
I'm just kidding around.
106
00:04:26,563 --> 00:04:28,982
I'm not kidding around.
107
00:04:32,277 --> 00:04:33,611
Ugh.
108
00:04:33,695 --> 00:04:35,238
Maker's Manhattan? 2:00 P.M.?
109
00:04:35,322 --> 00:04:36,781
Not judging.
110
00:04:36,865 --> 00:04:38,616
That guy tipped me a quarter.
111
00:04:38,700 --> 00:04:41,244
That's barely enough money
to buy three gallons of gas.
112
00:04:41,328 --> 00:04:43,163
- You want a slug?
- No, I got to stay sharp.
113
00:04:43,246 --> 00:04:44,956
I got another audition this afternoon.
114
00:04:45,040 --> 00:04:46,542
God, I can't wait till I'm finally up
115
00:04:46,624 --> 00:04:49,085
for real jobs instead of
these dumb commercials.
116
00:04:49,169 --> 00:04:52,005
"Here's the thing about
most long-distance plans."
117
00:04:52,088 --> 00:04:53,882
Ugh. I hate when people say that.
118
00:04:53,965 --> 00:04:56,092
- "Here's the thing."
- It's so stupid.
119
00:04:56,176 --> 00:04:57,719
Just say the thing.
120
00:04:57,802 --> 00:04:59,971
You don't need to introduce the concept
121
00:05:00,055 --> 00:05:02,057
that there's going to be a thing.
122
00:05:02,140 --> 00:05:03,683
I don't expect to be offered Secretariat
123
00:05:03,766 --> 00:05:05,477
right away, but when am I gonna be up
124
00:05:05,561 --> 00:05:06,936
for real roles?
125
00:05:07,020 --> 00:05:08,730
We'll get there, BJ. We both will.
126
00:05:08,813 --> 00:05:10,524
In fact, if I play my cards right,
127
00:05:10,607 --> 00:05:11,774
I might get there real soon.
128
00:05:11,858 --> 00:05:12,859
Wait.
129
00:05:12,942 --> 00:05:15,153
- Did the guys from ABC call?
- Uh-huh.
130
00:05:15,237 --> 00:05:17,197
They invited me to some hotshot event
131
00:05:17,280 --> 00:05:19,115
at LACMA this weekend.
132
00:05:19,199 --> 00:05:21,577
I'm gonna pitch 'em a TV
show while they're drunk.
133
00:05:21,659 --> 00:05:24,287
An off-the-clock,
non-work-related social event?
134
00:05:24,371 --> 00:05:26,289
That's the perfect time to pitch a TV show.
135
00:05:26,373 --> 00:05:27,499
You're brilliant.
136
00:05:27,583 --> 00:05:29,376
These people are so fancy.
137
00:05:29,459 --> 00:05:31,044
Look, look, look. Hey, hey, look.
138
00:05:31,127 --> 00:05:32,670
That's Joyce DeWitt, isn't it?
139
00:05:32,754 --> 00:05:34,797
That's Joyce DeWitt.
And that's Angela Diaz.
140
00:05:34,881 --> 00:05:36,758
And that's Ubu, the guy who sits.
141
00:05:36,841 --> 00:05:39,261
He is a good dog.
142
00:05:39,344 --> 00:05:41,346
Guys, don't take your eyes off the prize.
143
00:05:41,430 --> 00:05:43,806
We need to fill Charlotte's
bag with these mini quiches.
144
00:05:43,890 --> 00:05:45,267
This is our breakfast for June.
145
00:05:45,350 --> 00:05:46,768
- Herb Kazzaz.
- Shit, we're busted.
146
00:05:46,851 --> 00:05:48,520
Pretend you don't speak English.
147
00:05:48,604 --> 00:05:50,564
Buongiorno. Bon Jovi.
148
00:05:50,647 --> 00:05:52,815
Salutations. Crap, that's English.
149
00:05:52,899 --> 00:05:54,901
Hey, you mind if I steal
this superstar for a second?
150
00:05:54,984 --> 00:05:56,903
Okay, yeah. I'll catch you two later.
151
00:05:56,986 --> 00:05:58,029
Stay out of trouble. Oh, ho.
152
00:05:58,113 --> 00:05:59,406
Well, there he goes.
153
00:05:59,489 --> 00:06:00,782
Herb's about to hit the big time,
154
00:06:00,865 --> 00:06:02,367
and I'm just gonna be a small-fry
155
00:06:02,451 --> 00:06:04,869
doing tiny commercials
and eating mini quiches.
156
00:06:04,953 --> 00:06:06,079
You're dead wrong.
157
00:06:06,162 --> 00:06:07,372
You're gonna be a big success.
158
00:06:07,456 --> 00:06:09,082
Herb says that to me all the time.
159
00:06:09,165 --> 00:06:11,251
- He thinks the world of you.
- He does?
160
00:06:11,334 --> 00:06:13,878
Yeah, I'm not worried about
if you'll become a star.
161
00:06:13,962 --> 00:06:16,673
I'm more worried about how
you'll change when it happens.
162
00:06:16,756 --> 00:06:18,133
Like, you think I'll get fat?
163
00:06:18,216 --> 00:06:20,302
No, that's not what I'm talking about.
164
00:06:20,385 --> 00:06:21,386
So you're saying I definitely
165
00:06:21,470 --> 00:06:22,638
- won't get fat?
- No.
166
00:06:22,720 --> 00:06:24,180
Well, make up your mind, lady.
167
00:06:24,264 --> 00:06:26,849
Look over there. See those tar pits?
168
00:06:26,933 --> 00:06:28,393
Hollywood's a real pretty town
169
00:06:28,477 --> 00:06:31,020
that's smack on top of all that black tar.
170
00:06:31,104 --> 00:06:32,355
By the time you realize you're sinking,
171
00:06:32,439 --> 00:06:33,649
it's too late.
172
00:06:33,731 --> 00:06:35,567
Wait, is this a science lesson?
173
00:06:35,651 --> 00:06:37,444
No, BoJack, it's a metaphor.
174
00:06:37,527 --> 00:06:40,656
- Ugh, that's worse.
- BoJack, I'm moving to Maine.
175
00:06:40,738 --> 00:06:42,198
Whoa, whoa, whoa. Really?
176
00:06:42,282 --> 00:06:44,367
- Does Herb know?
- Yeah.
177
00:06:44,451 --> 00:06:47,078
I don't think I'm the
person Herb's looking for.
178
00:06:47,162 --> 00:06:49,164
I'm going to miss you, Charlotte.
179
00:06:49,247 --> 00:06:51,500
Hey, do you ever wonder
what would have happened
180
00:06:51,583 --> 00:06:53,335
if you'd met me before Herb did?
181
00:06:53,418 --> 00:06:54,919
Would you have made a move on me?
182
00:06:55,003 --> 00:06:57,046
- Charlotte...
- I don't think you would have.
183
00:06:57,130 --> 00:06:58,256
You know why?
184
00:06:58,340 --> 00:07:00,383
I think you're a coward.
185
00:07:00,467 --> 00:07:02,385
Now go stuff some prosciutto in your pants
186
00:07:02,469 --> 00:07:04,179
before that Webster kid takes it all.
187
00:07:06,055 --> 00:07:08,642
I love this town.
188
00:07:08,725 --> 00:07:10,477
Why did you bring me to Griffith Park?
189
00:07:10,560 --> 00:07:11,894
Are we gonna get in a knife fight
190
00:07:11,978 --> 00:07:13,313
like in Rebel Without a Cause?
191
00:07:13,396 --> 00:07:15,940
- I hate that title.
- He had several causes.
192
00:07:16,024 --> 00:07:17,734
I wanted to give you this.
193
00:07:17,859 --> 00:07:19,569
Look out at that city.
194
00:07:19,653 --> 00:07:21,112
What do you see?
195
00:07:21,196 --> 00:07:22,322
Wow, I didn't realize
196
00:07:22,405 --> 00:07:23,657
there were so many day hookers.
197
00:07:23,740 --> 00:07:25,617
I see a city that you and I
198
00:07:25,701 --> 00:07:28,077
will run someday, and
when we're both famous
199
00:07:28,161 --> 00:07:30,163
and have everything we've ever wanted,
200
00:07:30,246 --> 00:07:32,915
we'll come back here
together and high five.
201
00:07:32,999 --> 00:07:35,210
I'm not fully on board with
this new high five thing.
202
00:07:35,293 --> 00:07:36,712
What ever happened to the low five?
203
00:07:36,794 --> 00:07:38,380
Give me some skin.
204
00:07:38,463 --> 00:07:40,798
BJ, listen. I got a call from ABC today.
205
00:07:40,882 --> 00:07:42,175
They bought my TV pitch.
206
00:07:42,258 --> 00:07:43,468
What? That's amazing.
207
00:07:43,552 --> 00:07:47,430
- What's the show?
- It's called Horsin' Around.
208
00:07:47,514 --> 00:07:49,224
Well, good luck on your rocket ship
209
00:07:49,307 --> 00:07:50,726
to the top without me.
210
00:07:50,808 --> 00:07:52,352
No, BoJack, the show's about a horse,
211
00:07:52,435 --> 00:07:54,854
and I told those suits
if they want my show,
212
00:07:54,937 --> 00:07:57,315
then that horse is gonna
be BJ Goddamn Horseman.
213
00:07:57,399 --> 00:07:59,735
- Oh, my God.
- And they said, "No."
214
00:07:59,817 --> 00:08:01,695
- Oh.
- And I said, "Please?"
215
00:08:01,778 --> 00:08:02,945
And they said, "Okay."
216
00:08:03,029 --> 00:08:04,906
So, what do you say?
217
00:08:04,989 --> 00:08:06,783
- Want to be my star?
- Seriously?
218
00:08:06,866 --> 00:08:08,660
Of course I do. Of course, Herb.
219
00:08:08,744 --> 00:08:10,704
Jesus Christ, thank you.
220
00:08:10,787 --> 00:08:12,372
Mm-hmm... Whoa, whoa.
221
00:08:12,455 --> 00:08:14,249
I think you got the wrong idea here.
222
00:08:14,332 --> 00:08:15,875
- Yeah, no, man. Whoa.
- Herb, I'm not...
223
00:08:15,958 --> 00:08:17,460
Me either. No, I just... You know,
224
00:08:17,544 --> 00:08:20,255
- I caught up in the moment.
- Yeah, no, I gotcha.
225
00:08:20,338 --> 00:08:21,881
BJ, can you believe it?
226
00:08:21,964 --> 00:08:24,593
We're gonna make an actual TV show!
227
00:08:24,676 --> 00:08:26,553
One that takes an unflinching look
228
00:08:26,636 --> 00:08:30,473
at the gritty reality
of the American family.
229
00:08:30,557 --> 00:08:32,308
Just kidding. Let's get rich!
230
00:08:32,392 --> 00:08:33,643
Yeah.
231
00:08:35,978 --> 00:08:38,147
♪ Generic '90s grunge song ♪
232
00:08:38,231 --> 00:08:41,192
♪ Everyone in flannel ♪
233
00:08:41,276 --> 00:08:43,319
♪ Generic '90s grunge song ♪
234
00:08:43,403 --> 00:08:48,157
♪ Something from Seattle ♪
235
00:08:48,241 --> 00:08:49,867
Why would I say, "You'll never get me
236
00:08:49,951 --> 00:08:51,620
in that sweater" in this scene
237
00:08:51,703 --> 00:08:53,580
and then, in the very next scene,
238
00:08:53,663 --> 00:08:55,123
I'm wearing the sweater?
239
00:08:55,206 --> 00:08:56,833
Did my character suddenly forget
240
00:08:56,916 --> 00:08:58,293
that he didn't want to wear the sweater?
241
00:08:58,376 --> 00:08:59,669
No, see, that's actually the joke.
242
00:08:59,753 --> 00:09:01,129
Don't explain the joke to me.
243
00:09:01,212 --> 00:09:02,589
I just don't understand how it's a joke.
244
00:09:02,672 --> 00:09:04,924
So you do want me to explain it to you?
245
00:09:05,007 --> 00:09:06,509
I want you to add a scene showing
246
00:09:06,593 --> 00:09:08,094
how I changed my mind about the sweater
247
00:09:08,177 --> 00:09:09,763
so the goddamn episode makes sense.
248
00:09:09,846 --> 00:09:11,640
Look at me, doing your job for you.
249
00:09:11,723 --> 00:09:13,182
Way to go, Shakespeare.
250
00:09:13,266 --> 00:09:15,184
BJ, you're doing the scene as written.
251
00:09:15,268 --> 00:09:17,270
What happened to the stories I requested?
252
00:09:17,353 --> 00:09:19,689
Where's my rap? You said
you'd write me a rap.
253
00:09:19,773 --> 00:09:21,274
We're working on it.
254
00:09:21,357 --> 00:09:23,443
We just need a rhyme for
"and I'm here to say."
255
00:09:23,526 --> 00:09:25,027
Well, what about giving me Rollerblades?
256
00:09:25,111 --> 00:09:26,946
How are people gonna know
that my character is hip
257
00:09:27,029 --> 00:09:28,824
if he doesn't roll the blade?
258
00:09:28,906 --> 00:09:30,492
Just get out there and do your job.
259
00:09:30,575 --> 00:09:33,035
Every one of your ideas
is stupid or racist.
260
00:09:33,119 --> 00:09:34,537
That was one pitch,
261
00:09:34,621 --> 00:09:35,747
and I didn't say they're all thieves.
262
00:09:35,831 --> 00:09:37,457
But if you're too scared to start
263
00:09:37,540 --> 00:09:39,375
a national dialogue, maybe
I'll take my ideas home.
264
00:09:39,459 --> 00:09:41,837
Good luck making Horsin'
Around without the horse.
265
00:09:41,919 --> 00:09:43,588
BoJack, hon.
266
00:09:43,672 --> 00:09:45,841
That audience out there
traveled from all over
267
00:09:45,923 --> 00:09:48,468
the country just to
taste some of your magic.
268
00:09:48,551 --> 00:09:50,011
Do you really want to disappoint them?
269
00:09:50,094 --> 00:09:51,721
Okay, Sharona.
270
00:09:51,805 --> 00:09:54,808
I'll go out and jerk this limp script
271
00:09:54,891 --> 00:09:56,142
until it gets hard,
272
00:09:56,225 --> 00:09:57,602
but I'm not doing it for Herb.
273
00:09:57,686 --> 00:09:59,061
I'm doing it for the fans.
274
00:09:59,145 --> 00:10:00,689
And your 30K an episode.
275
00:10:00,772 --> 00:10:02,816
Let's give
it up for BoJack Horseman!
276
00:10:02,899 --> 00:10:05,151
And there better be some Zimas
277
00:10:05,234 --> 00:10:07,111
in my dressing room after the show.
278
00:10:09,614 --> 00:10:11,908
Wait a minute. This isn't the bar.
279
00:10:11,991 --> 00:10:13,785
I got to fire my assistant.
280
00:10:15,411 --> 00:10:17,539
You guys sound like
you're ready for a show.
281
00:10:19,749 --> 00:10:21,668
Oh, gross. Why do I
keep trying to like Zima?
282
00:10:23,961 --> 00:10:26,464
- Talk to me, world.
- BoJack, it's Princess Carolyn.
283
00:10:26,548 --> 00:10:27,841
How are you doing today?
284
00:10:27,924 --> 00:10:29,258
Well, I'll tell you my problem.
285
00:10:29,342 --> 00:10:31,845
I just keep getting handsomer.
286
00:10:31,928 --> 00:10:33,429
Good problems to have.
287
00:10:33,513 --> 00:10:34,764
Hold for a sec.
288
00:10:34,848 --> 00:10:36,057
I've got your agent on the line.
289
00:10:36,140 --> 00:10:39,227
BoJack Goddamn Horseface.
290
00:10:39,310 --> 00:10:43,648
I got some news so good,
you'll goddamn kiss me.
291
00:10:43,732 --> 00:10:45,024
Put it here. Put it here.
292
00:10:45,107 --> 00:10:46,609
What's the role you've been dying
293
00:10:46,693 --> 00:10:48,277
to play your whole life,
294
00:10:48,361 --> 00:10:51,239
besides Kathy Ireland's bathing suit?
295
00:10:51,322 --> 00:10:53,909
Ha-ha. She is attractive.
296
00:10:53,991 --> 00:10:59,247
Good God, when I die,
bury me in Kathy Ireland.
297
00:10:59,330 --> 00:11:01,207
Uh, Marv? Marv?
298
00:11:01,290 --> 00:11:02,751
What's the big news?
299
00:11:02,834 --> 00:11:04,043
Secretariat!
300
00:11:04,126 --> 00:11:06,546
It's happening, and it's down
301
00:11:06,629 --> 00:11:09,257
to you and Val Kilmer for the title role.
302
00:11:09,340 --> 00:11:10,633
That's amazing.
303
00:11:10,717 --> 00:11:12,218
Thank you. Thank you.
304
00:11:12,301 --> 00:11:13,762
Now, listen.
305
00:11:13,845 --> 00:11:15,805
I don't want to see you
in any more tabloids.
306
00:11:15,889 --> 00:11:18,934
Keep your head down and your nose clean.
307
00:11:19,016 --> 00:11:20,226
Now, I gotta go.
308
00:11:20,309 --> 00:11:23,145
I got a lunch with MC Skat Kat.
309
00:11:24,856 --> 00:11:26,608
Scandal breaking today
310
00:11:26,691 --> 00:11:29,193
surrounding the family
sitcom, Horsin' Around.
311
00:11:29,277 --> 00:11:30,946
Oh, God. What did I do this time?
312
00:11:31,028 --> 00:11:32,948
Herb Kazzaz, the show's creator,
313
00:11:33,030 --> 00:11:35,617
was caught tonight in an LAPD sting
314
00:11:35,700 --> 00:11:37,285
- on public indecency.
- Wha...
315
00:11:37,368 --> 00:11:38,995
Police say Mr. Kazzaz
was caught in the middle
316
00:11:39,078 --> 00:11:41,247
of lewd acts with another man.
317
00:11:41,330 --> 00:11:43,458
Conservative groups have
been quick to organize.
318
00:11:43,541 --> 00:11:45,877
Horsin' Around is a show for kids.
319
00:11:45,961 --> 00:11:48,588
My family should be able to
watch those nubile preteens
320
00:11:48,671 --> 00:11:51,048
without men like perv Kazzaz flaunting
321
00:11:51,132 --> 00:11:53,384
their alternative lifestyles
and ruining America.
322
00:11:53,468 --> 00:11:58,974
Sheeeiiiiit.
323
00:12:01,893 --> 00:12:03,645
BoJack, I gotta tell ya.
324
00:12:03,728 --> 00:12:06,147
- I'm gay.
- No doy.
325
00:12:06,230 --> 00:12:09,484
I know we haven't been close
for the past couple years.
326
00:12:09,567 --> 00:12:10,860
Okay, I'm gonna hold back my "No doys"
327
00:12:10,944 --> 00:12:11,987
because there might be a lot.
328
00:12:12,069 --> 00:12:13,362
But you know me, right?
329
00:12:13,446 --> 00:12:14,990
You know that I'm a good guy.
330
00:12:15,072 --> 00:12:16,741
They're gunning for me at the network,
331
00:12:16,825 --> 00:12:19,285
and if I get kicked off
this, I won't recover.
332
00:12:19,368 --> 00:12:21,120
I need to know that you've got my back.
333
00:12:21,203 --> 00:12:24,165
If you threaten to walk,
they'll listen to you.
334
00:12:24,248 --> 00:12:26,417
Herb, you picked the
worst possible time to...
335
00:12:26,501 --> 00:12:29,629
Hey, you know I wouldn't
ask if I didn't need it.
336
00:12:29,712 --> 00:12:31,631
Come on, BoJack.
337
00:12:31,714 --> 00:12:33,800
How'd we get so far apart, huh?
338
00:12:36,052 --> 00:12:38,930
You know what? You can count on me, Herb.
339
00:12:39,014 --> 00:12:41,140
I mean, I wouldn't even be
here if it weren't for you.
340
00:12:41,223 --> 00:12:43,601
I knew it! I knew you'd come through.
341
00:12:43,685 --> 00:12:45,436
And when this is all over, we're going
342
00:12:45,520 --> 00:12:47,104
to drive back up to Griffith Park.
343
00:12:47,188 --> 00:12:49,357
I still owe you that high five, right?
344
00:12:49,440 --> 00:12:50,984
Hey, this is a dumb question,
345
00:12:51,067 --> 00:12:52,944
but do you guys ever,
like, all link up together
346
00:12:53,028 --> 00:12:54,988
and do, like, a party
train or a fun circle?
347
00:12:55,071 --> 00:12:56,489
'Cause I feel like I'd
be doing that all the...
348
00:12:56,572 --> 00:12:57,824
Never mind. Stupid question.
349
00:12:57,907 --> 00:12:59,450
Feel stupid for asking that.
350
00:13:03,204 --> 00:13:04,580
Go right ahead.
351
00:13:04,664 --> 00:13:06,708
And then it goes, "I like healthy gums
352
00:13:06,791 --> 00:13:08,167
in a major way."
353
00:13:08,250 --> 00:13:09,544
See, that's what I'm talking about.
354
00:13:09,627 --> 00:13:11,128
That's great.
355
00:13:11,212 --> 00:13:13,089
We just gotta make sure
that we work in the phrase
356
00:13:13,172 --> 00:13:15,717
"toothbrush rap" early,
so they know I'm rapping.
357
00:13:18,260 --> 00:13:20,972
BoJack, can we chat for a second?
358
00:13:21,056 --> 00:13:24,684
Ugh. Here we go. It's the big one.
359
00:13:24,767 --> 00:13:27,144
I'm not gonna waste
your time with small talk
360
00:13:27,228 --> 00:13:29,313
because you work for me,
and your time is my time.
361
00:13:29,397 --> 00:13:31,024
We're letting Herb go.
362
00:13:31,107 --> 00:13:32,692
- You can't do that.
- "I can't do that."
363
00:13:32,775 --> 00:13:34,610
I'm not asking you. It's nothing personal.
364
00:13:34,694 --> 00:13:36,696
I like Herb. I think he's a good guy.
365
00:13:36,779 --> 00:13:38,322
But this is a business, and every day
366
00:13:38,406 --> 00:13:39,866
we don't fire him, we're flushing money
367
00:13:39,949 --> 00:13:41,701
- down the crapper.
- Well, if he goes, I go.
368
00:13:41,784 --> 00:13:42,994
"Well, if he goes, you
go." I wouldn't do that.
369
00:13:43,078 --> 00:13:44,704
BoJack, I think you're a star,
370
00:13:44,787 --> 00:13:47,832
and sometimes being a star
means making tough choices.
371
00:13:47,916 --> 00:13:50,085
You can storm out, make a big show out of
372
00:13:50,167 --> 00:13:51,460
what a "good" friend you are,
373
00:13:51,544 --> 00:13:53,379
or you could be the guy who does his job.
374
00:13:53,462 --> 00:13:54,839
- Angela...
- I'll tell you when
375
00:13:54,923 --> 00:13:56,632
it's your turn to talk again.
376
00:13:56,716 --> 00:13:58,760
Look, you're a star,
but this is really just
377
00:13:58,843 --> 00:14:01,054
the beginning of the BoJack Horseman story.
378
00:14:01,137 --> 00:14:03,472
You can choose whatever path you want,
379
00:14:03,556 --> 00:14:05,016
but I'll tell you right now.
380
00:14:05,100 --> 00:14:06,684
You don't win awards and you don't
381
00:14:06,768 --> 00:14:08,603
get to be on the covers of magazines
382
00:14:08,686 --> 00:14:10,438
and you don't get to play the lead role
383
00:14:10,521 --> 00:14:13,274
in the Secretariat movie
by being a good friend.
384
00:14:13,357 --> 00:14:15,985
What's that old expression
about how the show must go on?
385
00:14:16,069 --> 00:14:18,821
Oh, right. It's "Don't be an idiot."
386
00:14:18,905 --> 00:14:22,117
So what do you think, BoJack?
That's a courtesy question.
387
00:14:22,199 --> 00:14:24,744
I already know what you think
because I have conversations
388
00:14:24,827 --> 00:14:26,412
like this one five times a day.
389
00:14:26,495 --> 00:14:28,372
I know who you are, and I know
390
00:14:28,456 --> 00:14:29,457
you've already made your decision.
391
00:14:29,540 --> 00:14:31,126
But if you want to surprise me,
392
00:14:31,208 --> 00:14:32,585
now's the time to do it.
393
00:14:32,668 --> 00:14:34,420
That's what I thought.
394
00:14:34,503 --> 00:14:36,380
You're doing the right
thing. I know it's hard.
395
00:14:36,464 --> 00:14:38,549
But if Herb's really your
friend, he'll understand.
396
00:14:38,633 --> 00:14:40,593
Now, you've got a show to put on,
397
00:14:40,676 --> 00:14:42,053
so I'll let you get ready.
398
00:14:42,137 --> 00:14:44,430
This was a good conversation. Productive.
399
00:14:44,513 --> 00:14:48,225
If you're lucky, I'll
never talk to you again.
400
00:14:52,605 --> 00:14:54,565
You folks ready for a show?
401
00:14:56,109 --> 00:14:57,735
'Cause I think a certain someone
402
00:14:57,819 --> 00:14:59,904
might show up any second.
403
00:15:07,036 --> 00:15:08,370
Wait a minute.
404
00:15:08,454 --> 00:15:10,039
This isn't the bar.
405
00:15:10,123 --> 00:15:12,041
I gotta fire my assistant.
406
00:15:15,670 --> 00:15:18,631
So what ended up
happening with Secretariat?
407
00:15:18,714 --> 00:15:20,257
Went into turnaround.
408
00:15:20,341 --> 00:15:21,926
I don't totally know
what "turnaround" means,
409
00:15:22,010 --> 00:15:24,887
- but they never made the movie.
- Whoa.
410
00:15:24,971 --> 00:15:28,099
This house is way bigger than yours.
411
00:15:28,183 --> 00:15:31,102
Herb's done really well
for a guy you dicked over.
412
00:15:31,186 --> 00:15:32,728
- Oh, no. Ah.
- That's enough out of you.
413
00:15:32,812 --> 00:15:34,313
Stay out here and turn this car around
414
00:15:34,396 --> 00:15:36,191
in case we need to leave in a hurry.
415
00:15:36,273 --> 00:15:38,151
Hooray. A task.
416
00:15:42,822 --> 00:15:44,782
BoJack! Well.
417
00:15:44,866 --> 00:15:46,492
Jesus, you look shitty.
418
00:15:46,575 --> 00:15:49,120
Have you been eating your
guilt this whole time?
419
00:15:52,414 --> 00:15:54,583
Yeah, you don't look so hot yourself, Herb.
420
00:15:54,667 --> 00:15:57,879
I have cancer.
421
00:15:57,962 --> 00:16:00,215
And hello. Who's this stunning creature?
422
00:16:00,297 --> 00:16:01,757
And what string of bad decisions
423
00:16:01,841 --> 00:16:03,300
has placed you in BoJack's orbit?
424
00:16:03,384 --> 00:16:04,844
- Uh...
- This is Diane.
425
00:16:04,927 --> 00:16:06,345
She's writing a book about me.
426
00:16:06,428 --> 00:16:08,056
Pleasure to meet you.
427
00:16:08,139 --> 00:16:10,266
Is your book called,
Portrait of an Asshole?
428
00:16:10,349 --> 00:16:12,018
I kid.
429
00:16:12,101 --> 00:16:13,936
It's funny, because he ruined my life.
430
00:16:14,020 --> 00:16:15,354
I joke. It's what I do.
431
00:16:15,479 --> 00:16:16,731
Please, come in.
432
00:16:16,814 --> 00:16:17,815
You're letting out all the cancer.
433
00:16:17,899 --> 00:16:19,192
Ha ha ha ha ha ha!
434
00:16:20,902 --> 00:16:22,237
Ha ha...
435
00:16:22,319 --> 00:16:23,821
Almost. Ah...
436
00:16:23,905 --> 00:16:26,115
Almost there.
437
00:16:26,199 --> 00:16:28,243
Come on... ah.
438
00:16:28,325 --> 00:16:30,536
Oh, thanks. Thanks.
439
00:16:30,619 --> 00:16:33,372
BoJack, how are your utensils?
440
00:16:33,455 --> 00:16:35,083
- Uh, they're fine.
- Are you sure?
441
00:16:35,166 --> 00:16:36,876
Because if that knife ain't sharp enough,
442
00:16:36,959 --> 00:16:39,754
I got another that you left
in my back 20 years ago.
443
00:16:39,837 --> 00:16:41,256
Could have seen that coming.
444
00:16:41,338 --> 00:16:42,631
Who asks about utensils?
445
00:16:42,715 --> 00:16:43,841
I'm gonna go to the bathroom.
446
00:16:43,925 --> 00:16:45,634
Nope. No, you are not.
447
00:16:45,718 --> 00:16:47,262
Uh.
448
00:16:47,344 --> 00:16:49,264
Oh. Ow. Almost.
449
00:16:51,432 --> 00:16:53,350
- Drive, drive, drive!
- Oh. Oh, no.
450
00:16:53,434 --> 00:16:55,186
I can't turn the car around.
451
00:16:55,270 --> 00:16:57,396
I've been trying to do this
three-point turn forever.
452
00:16:57,479 --> 00:16:59,774
I mean, it's more like a 300-point turn.
453
00:16:59,857 --> 00:17:01,358
- Am I right, huh?
- Hee hee hee hee!
454
00:17:01,442 --> 00:17:02,860
Hey, we've got two sacks
455
00:17:02,944 --> 00:17:04,653
of Kardashian swag and
the fuzz on our heels.
456
00:17:04,737 --> 00:17:07,282
You think this is Driver's
Ed, you hat-wearing pussy?
457
00:17:07,364 --> 00:17:10,785
Drive the goddamn car!
458
00:17:14,663 --> 00:17:15,664
Hey, Herb,
459
00:17:15,748 --> 00:17:17,292
is that your Vitamix?
460
00:17:17,374 --> 00:17:18,584
BoJack has one, too.
461
00:17:18,667 --> 00:17:20,044
I wonder if you guys have
462
00:17:20,128 --> 00:17:23,339
strong opinions about
it one way or the other.
463
00:17:23,422 --> 00:17:25,133
Well, the stupid thing was like 600 bucks.
464
00:17:25,216 --> 00:17:27,218
I have used mine a grand
total of zero times.
465
00:17:27,302 --> 00:17:29,511
I got it a month before I
was diagnosed with cancer.
466
00:17:29,595 --> 00:17:31,306
I don't give a shit about
being healthy anymore.
467
00:17:31,388 --> 00:17:33,057
I don't even have cancer,
and I don't use it.
468
00:17:33,141 --> 00:17:34,475
- So who's it for?
- Exactly.
469
00:17:34,558 --> 00:17:36,352
What is so great about liquids?
470
00:17:36,435 --> 00:17:39,480
Every article I read now is
"juice this" and "juice that."
471
00:17:39,563 --> 00:17:41,774
You know why? Juice controls the media.
472
00:17:41,857 --> 00:17:45,194
Hey-ooh.
473
00:17:45,278 --> 00:17:47,071
Can't this thing go any faster?
474
00:17:47,155 --> 00:17:49,448
Uh, I'm going as fast as I can.
475
00:17:52,285 --> 00:17:53,786
Do you want me to get
out? Try to guide you?
476
00:17:53,869 --> 00:17:55,204
No, I think I'm almost there.
477
00:17:55,288 --> 00:17:56,580
You're doing a great job.
478
00:17:56,664 --> 00:17:58,791
Kenzie, stop talking to him.
479
00:17:58,874 --> 00:18:00,876
Why? He's being nice.
480
00:18:00,960 --> 00:18:02,086
Remember the number one rule
481
00:18:02,170 --> 00:18:03,712
of the Celebrity Stealing Club...
482
00:18:03,796 --> 00:18:05,631
- "No falling in love."
- Ugh.
483
00:18:05,714 --> 00:18:07,800
That's your rule for every club.
484
00:18:07,883 --> 00:18:09,677
It's a good rule.
485
00:18:09,760 --> 00:18:11,846
Whoa. Whoa, guys.
486
00:18:11,929 --> 00:18:14,223
I'm sensing a lot of hostility here.
487
00:18:14,307 --> 00:18:17,810
Maybe we should take our
masks off and actually talk.
488
00:18:17,893 --> 00:18:20,313
You want me to take my mask off? Fine.
489
00:18:20,396 --> 00:18:22,564
Happy? I took my mask off.
490
00:18:22,648 --> 00:18:24,066
Did you?
491
00:18:24,150 --> 00:18:27,320
Because I think you're
still wearing a mask.
492
00:18:27,403 --> 00:18:29,905
Oh.
493
00:18:29,989 --> 00:18:32,367
Oh, my God, Herb, you
met President Clinton?
494
00:18:32,449 --> 00:18:33,868
Oh, yeah. Many times.
495
00:18:33,951 --> 00:18:35,328
Did you think that I
spent the last 20 years
496
00:18:35,411 --> 00:18:37,246
on my couch just feeling sorry for myself?
497
00:18:37,330 --> 00:18:39,415
I mean, I did do that,
but I also started...
498
00:18:39,498 --> 00:18:41,500
a charity to bring clean water
499
00:18:41,583 --> 00:18:43,460
to millions of children
in Sub-Saharan Africa.
500
00:18:43,544 --> 00:18:44,837
Oh, wow.
501
00:18:44,920 --> 00:18:46,422
I presented at the Teen Choice Awards.
502
00:18:46,505 --> 00:18:48,341
Wait, is that Charlotte?
503
00:18:48,424 --> 00:18:49,633
Yeah, yeah. We kept in touch.
504
00:18:49,717 --> 00:18:51,260
You should actually give her a call.
505
00:18:51,344 --> 00:18:53,095
I'm sure she'd love to hear from you.
506
00:18:53,179 --> 00:18:54,847
She looks good for someone so old.
507
00:18:54,930 --> 00:18:56,098
She's three years younger than you.
508
00:18:56,182 --> 00:18:58,184
Exactly!
509
00:18:58,267 --> 00:19:00,019
Er?
510
00:19:00,102 --> 00:19:01,937
Well, guys, I'm pretty beat.
511
00:19:02,021 --> 00:19:03,314
I think I need to head off to bed,
512
00:19:03,398 --> 00:19:04,815
and I hope I actually wake up later.
513
00:19:06,942 --> 00:19:10,446
And it was actually
nice to see you, BoJack.
514
00:19:10,529 --> 00:19:11,613
You can see yourselves out.
515
00:19:13,449 --> 00:19:15,368
"Juice controls the media."
516
00:19:15,451 --> 00:19:18,120
I love it.
517
00:19:19,830 --> 00:19:21,290
So I guess in a sense
518
00:19:21,374 --> 00:19:22,917
I'm running away from the cops,
519
00:19:23,000 --> 00:19:26,170
but I feel like in another, truer sense,
520
00:19:26,254 --> 00:19:28,256
I'm running away from myself.
521
00:19:28,339 --> 00:19:30,549
- Truth. Truth.
- Whoa.
522
00:19:30,632 --> 00:19:32,843
Kenzie, do you have anything to share?
523
00:19:32,927 --> 00:19:34,803
Just how amazing it feels to finally
524
00:19:34,887 --> 00:19:35,930
be honest for once.
525
00:19:36,013 --> 00:19:37,514
I could live a million lives,
526
00:19:37,598 --> 00:19:39,434
and I'd never forget this one afternoon.
527
00:19:39,516 --> 00:19:40,684
Word.
528
00:19:40,768 --> 00:19:41,977
You know, I act all cool
529
00:19:42,061 --> 00:19:43,938
and sophisticated on the outside,
530
00:19:44,063 --> 00:19:47,275
but on the inside, I'm just Todd, you know?
531
00:19:47,358 --> 00:19:49,402
But thanks to you guys, I think I'm finally
532
00:19:49,485 --> 00:19:51,112
- ready to let my guard down.
- Do you hear that?
533
00:19:51,195 --> 00:19:53,281
- He's letting his guard down.
- Let's get him!
534
00:19:53,364 --> 00:19:54,782
Oh!
535
00:19:54,865 --> 00:19:57,118
Celebrity Stealing
Club strikes again.
536
00:20:01,747 --> 00:20:05,042
This... This just doesn't feel right.
537
00:20:05,167 --> 00:20:07,002
I should have brought a bottle of wine.
538
00:20:07,086 --> 00:20:09,213
That's what adults do. BoJack, damn it.
539
00:20:09,297 --> 00:20:10,839
Is that what's bothering you,
540
00:20:10,923 --> 00:20:12,883
- that you didn't bring wine?
- You're right.
541
00:20:12,967 --> 00:20:14,302
I just would have drunk it on the way here.
542
00:20:14,385 --> 00:20:16,262
This isn't about wine, BoJack.
543
00:20:16,345 --> 00:20:19,265
If you have something you
need to say to someone,
544
00:20:19,348 --> 00:20:21,934
you should do it while you have the chance
545
00:20:22,017 --> 00:20:24,979
because before you know
it, it'll be too late.
546
00:20:25,104 --> 00:20:26,688
Is this one of those
things where we're talking
547
00:20:26,772 --> 00:20:29,108
about Herb but we're actually
talking about something else?
548
00:20:29,191 --> 00:20:31,986
- No, I was talking about Herb.
- Okay, good. Yeah, me, too.
549
00:20:32,069 --> 00:20:34,655
Hey, buddy!
550
00:20:34,738 --> 00:20:36,865
You come back for that Vitamix, you...
551
00:20:39,076 --> 00:20:40,536
Ooh, you should get that looked at.
552
00:20:40,619 --> 00:20:43,038
Yeah. I've been meaning to see a doctor.
553
00:20:43,122 --> 00:20:46,375
Hey, I wanted to talk
to you about... you know.
554
00:20:46,459 --> 00:20:51,005
I feel bad about what happened.
555
00:20:51,088 --> 00:20:53,174
So you're apologizing.
556
00:20:53,257 --> 00:20:55,468
Yes. I'm sorry.
557
00:20:55,551 --> 00:20:57,512
Okay. I don't forgive you.
558
00:20:57,594 --> 00:20:58,971
Herb, I said I'm sorry.
559
00:20:59,054 --> 00:21:01,765
Yeah, and I do not forgive you.
560
00:21:01,849 --> 00:21:04,810
Uh... not sure you get
what's happening here.
561
00:21:04,893 --> 00:21:06,979
This could be the last time that you...
562
00:21:07,104 --> 00:21:09,398
No. I'm not gonna give you closure.
563
00:21:09,482 --> 00:21:10,858
You don't get that.
564
00:21:10,941 --> 00:21:12,527
You have to live
565
00:21:12,609 --> 00:21:14,111
with the shitty thing you did
566
00:21:14,195 --> 00:21:15,530
for the rest of your life.
567
00:21:15,612 --> 00:21:17,406
You have to know that it's never,
568
00:21:17,490 --> 00:21:18,949
ever going to be okay.
569
00:21:19,033 --> 00:21:21,035
I really think that we'd both
570
00:21:21,118 --> 00:21:22,661
- feel better if we just...
- I'm dying.
571
00:21:22,744 --> 00:21:24,372
I'm not gonna feel better,
572
00:21:24,455 --> 00:21:26,665
and I'm not gonna be your
prop so you can feel better.
573
00:21:26,748 --> 00:21:28,501
You have to believe me.
574
00:21:28,584 --> 00:21:30,127
- I did everything I could.
- Yeah?
575
00:21:30,211 --> 00:21:32,254
Then why didn't you call me? Huh?
576
00:21:32,338 --> 00:21:34,673
20 years... You didn't call me.
577
00:21:34,756 --> 00:21:37,259
Look, I... I wanted to,
but I didn't think...
578
00:21:37,343 --> 00:21:38,553
You know what it was like for me?
579
00:21:38,635 --> 00:21:40,762
I had nobody. Everybody left.
580
00:21:40,846 --> 00:21:42,557
I knew all those showbiz
phonies would turn on me.
581
00:21:42,639 --> 00:21:43,974
Sure. But you?
582
00:21:44,058 --> 00:21:45,642
It's not my fault you got fired.
583
00:21:45,726 --> 00:21:47,728
I don't care about the job!
584
00:21:47,811 --> 00:21:50,898
I did fine. I had a good life.
585
00:21:50,981 --> 00:21:53,025
But what I needed then was a friend,
586
00:21:53,108 --> 00:21:55,194
and you abandoned me.
587
00:21:55,277 --> 00:21:58,531
And I will never forgive you for that.
588
00:21:58,614 --> 00:22:02,201
Now, get the fuck out of my house.
589
00:22:02,284 --> 00:22:03,911
I...
590
00:22:08,082 --> 00:22:09,791
Hey, this is a dumb
question, but the gay thing
591
00:22:09,875 --> 00:22:11,419
and the rectal cancer thing
aren't related, are they?
592
00:22:11,502 --> 00:22:12,753
- Get out of here!
- Never mind.
593
00:22:12,836 --> 00:22:15,047
Stupid question. Forget I brought it up.
594
00:22:15,130 --> 00:22:17,592
- Huh.
- Hey, BJ.
595
00:22:17,674 --> 00:22:20,094
- Put that back, asshole!
- No, you gave this to me.
596
00:22:20,177 --> 00:22:21,303
No!
597
00:22:23,972 --> 00:22:25,516
BoJack?
598
00:22:25,600 --> 00:22:28,352
What are you doing? Get off him.
599
00:22:28,436 --> 00:22:30,687
The show was never the
same after I left. Admit it.
600
00:22:30,812 --> 00:22:33,107
Some people prefer the later years.
601
00:22:34,609 --> 00:22:37,152
BoJack. Come on.
602
00:22:37,236 --> 00:22:39,780
Thank you for inviting us.
603
00:22:39,863 --> 00:22:41,949
You have a lovely home.
604
00:22:42,032 --> 00:22:43,492
You know what your problem is?
605
00:22:43,576 --> 00:22:45,827
You want to think of
yourself as the good guy.
606
00:22:45,911 --> 00:22:47,788
Well, I know you better than anyone,
607
00:22:47,871 --> 00:22:50,124
and I can tell you that you're not.
608
00:22:50,207 --> 00:22:53,419
In fact, you'd probably
sleep a lot better at night
609
00:22:53,502 --> 00:22:55,212
if you just admitted to yourself
610
00:22:55,296 --> 00:22:57,548
that you're a selfish goddamn coward
611
00:22:57,632 --> 00:23:00,509
who takes whatever he wants
and doesn't give a shit
612
00:23:00,593 --> 00:23:02,010
about who he hurts.
613
00:23:02,094 --> 00:23:05,347
That's you. That's BoJack Horseman.
614
00:23:05,431 --> 00:23:08,601
I don't know why I came here.
615
00:23:08,684 --> 00:23:12,187
Yeah. You do.
616
00:23:14,273 --> 00:23:16,525
You
said you wanted a job.
617
00:23:16,609 --> 00:23:19,528
It doesn't matter. Nothing matters.
618
00:23:19,612 --> 00:23:21,614
Wow. What happened in Malibu?
619
00:23:21,697 --> 00:23:23,824
I gotta go.
620
00:23:23,907 --> 00:23:25,951
Hey, bright side.
621
00:23:26,034 --> 00:23:27,953
At least now you have a good story to tell
622
00:23:28,036 --> 00:23:29,997
at his funeral.
623
00:23:30,080 --> 00:23:32,082
Ugh, God.
624
00:23:43,802 --> 00:23:46,054
I'm not trying to kill the vibe here,
625
00:23:46,138 --> 00:23:48,683
but I've had to pee for, like, three hours.
626
00:23:50,476 --> 00:23:51,977
Look, I won't put what happened today
627
00:23:52,060 --> 00:23:53,729
in the book if you don't want me to.
628
00:23:53,812 --> 00:23:55,147
No, it's okay.
629
00:23:55,230 --> 00:23:57,232
Full truth like we agreed.
630
00:23:57,316 --> 00:23:58,400
Warts and all.
631
00:23:58,484 --> 00:23:59,943
It doesn't matter anyway.
632
00:24:00,027 --> 00:24:02,112
I don't even care what
anybody thinks anymore.
633
00:24:02,196 --> 00:24:03,656
Well, for what it's worth,
634
00:24:03,739 --> 00:24:05,199
I think it took a lot of guts
635
00:24:05,282 --> 00:24:06,701
to do what you did back there.
636
00:24:09,453 --> 00:24:10,705
- Mmm...
- Mm!
637
00:24:17,002 --> 00:24:24,009
Synced by emmasan
www.addic7ed.com
638
00:24:27,846 --> 00:24:30,098
♪ Back in the '90s ♪
639
00:24:30,182 --> 00:24:35,145
♪ I was in a very famous TV show ♪
640
00:24:37,439 --> 00:24:39,233
- ♪ I'm BoJack the horse ♪
- ♪ BoJack ♪
641
00:24:39,316 --> 00:24:40,651
♪ BoJack the horse ♪
642
00:24:40,735 --> 00:24:44,613
♪ Don't act like you don't know ♪
643
00:24:46,699 --> 00:24:50,869
♪ And I'm trying to
hold on to my past ♪
644
00:24:50,952 --> 00:24:52,371
♪ It's been so long ♪
645
00:24:52,454 --> 00:24:55,874
♪ I don't think I'm gonna last ♪
646
00:24:55,957 --> 00:24:57,209
♪ I guess I'll just try ♪
647
00:24:57,292 --> 00:24:59,378
♪ And make you understand ♪
648
00:24:59,461 --> 00:25:03,758
♪ That I'm more horse than a man ♪
649
00:25:03,840 --> 00:25:08,470
♪ Or I'm more man than a horse ♪
650
00:25:08,596 --> 00:25:10,222
♪ BoJack ♪
651
00:25:14,685 --> 00:25:16,562
It's a Kazzaz-trophe.