Steve: FROM STUDIO 6B IN ROCKEFELLER CENTER IN THE HEART
OF NEW YORK CITY, IT'S "THE TONIGHT SHOW STARRING JIMMY FALLON."
TONIGHT, JOIN JIMMY AND HIS GUESTS - JUDE LAW
JOSHUA JACKSON COMEDIAN, JACKIE FABULOUS. AND FEATURING THE LEGENDARY
ROOTS CREW Questlove: 1839
Steve: AND NOW, HERE HE IS, JIMMY FALLON
♪ [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE Jimmy: OH, MY GOODNESS!
[ CHEERING ] THANK YOU SO MUCH. THANK YOU.
ENJOY YOURSELF THANK YOU, EVERYBODY WELCOME, WELCOME, WELCOME TO
"THE TONIGHT SHOW. YOU'RE HERE! THANK YOU FOR WATCHING
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE WELL, GUYS, HERE'S SOME BIG NEWS TODAY
PRESIDENT BIDEN OFFICIALLY LAUNCHED HIS 2024 REELECTION CAMPAIGN
AND-- YEAH. [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE AND ACCORDING TO POLLS, MOST
DEMOCRATS DON'T WANT BIDEN TO RUN AGAIN. THEN BIDEN SAID, "HEY, NONE OF
YOU WANTED 'AVATAR 2,' BUT LOOK HOW THAT TURNED OUT. IT'S A BIG HIT
[ LAUGHTER ] YEP, BIDEN WILL BE THE OLDEST PERSON TO EVER RUN FOR
PRESIDENT. YEP. SO, IN TWO YEARS, HE'LL EITHER
BE LEADER OF THE FREE WORLD OR A GREETER AT WALMART [ LAUGHTER ]
EITHER WAY, WE'LL FIND OUT BIDEN'S CAMPAIGN SLOGAN IS "FINISH THE JOB.
FINISH THE JOB AMERICA SAID, "THEY'D BE HAPPY IF HE COULD JUST FINISH
A STORY. [ LAUGHTER ] FINISH THE JOB-- IT SOUNDS
LIKE SOMETHING YOUR FIGHTER YELLS IN A KNOCKOFF VERSION OF "MORTAL KOMBAT."
[ LAUGHTER ] "FINISH THE JOB! YEP, BIDEN HAS LAUNCHED HIS
REELECTION CAMPAIGN. AND GET THIS, HE ACTUALLY AGREED TO JOIN US FOR AN
INTERVIEW TO TALK ABOUT IT [ AUDIENCE OOHS YEAH, SO, RIGHT NOW, WE'RE
GOING TO ASK HIM A FEW QUESTIONS. MR. PRESIDENT, HOW DO YOU
RESPOND TO PEOPLE WHO THINK THAT YOU'RE TOO OLD TO RUN FOR REELECTION
I'M SORRY I CAN'T HEAR YOU [ LAUGHTER ]
Jimmy: IT'S OKAY. WE'LL JUST-- WE'LL MOVE ON. OKAY
WHEN DID YOU DECIDE YOU WANTED TO RUN FOR TWO TERMS THAT WAS BACK IN 1871, I
THINK. [ LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE Jimmy: OKAY
1871 [ APPLAUSE ] NOW PRESIDENTIAL CAMPAIGNS HAVE
BEEN GETTING MORE AND MORE EXPENSIVE. HOW MUCH MONEY DO YOU THINK
IT'S GOING TO COST TO RUN YOURS? BILLIONS-- TRILLION,
$700 MILLION, BILLION DOLLAR [ LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE Jimmy: NEXT QUESTION.
OBAMA'S CAMPAIGN SLOGAN WAS "YES, WE CAN." WHAT IS YOURS?
"I'M NOT A JOKE." Jimmy: OKAY I DIDN'T-- OKAY, GOT IT
WELL, YOU'VE GOT A LONG ROAD AHEAD OF YOU HOW WOULD YOU DESCRIBE YOUR
SPEECHES, RALLIES, AND DEBATES BORING, BORING, BORING. [ LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE
Jimmy: OKAY, OKAY NO, LOOK - NOW, LET'S JUST GO-- YOU SAY
THAT YOU'RE RUNNING TO HELP PEOPLE WHO WOULD YOU SAY NEEDS THE
MOST HELP IN THE COUNTRY RIGHT NOW? FOX NEWS.
Jimmy: OKAY [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE Jimmy: ALL RIGHT.
LAST QUESTION. A LOT OF PEOPLE POINTED OUT, TODAY MARKED FOUR YEARS, TO THE
DAY, SINCE YOU ANNOUNCED YOUR LAST RUN FOR PRESIDENT WHAT DO YOU HAVE TO SAY TO THAT
WHAT DO YOU HAVE TO SAY TO THAT CAMPAIGN
HAPPY BIRTHDAY DEAR--
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU ♪ Jimmy: THANK YOU VERY MUCH. NEVER MIND
THANK YOU VERY MUCH. THE PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES, JOE BIDEN
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE THANK YOU, JOE THANK YOU, VERY MUCH
♪ HAPPY BIRTHDAY DEAR--♪ [ LAUGHTER ] Jimmy: AW, THAT'S SO
SPECIAL. Steve: OH, MY GOD Jimmy: THAT MADE ME FEEL SO
GOOD THANK YOU SO MUCH. >> Steve: OH, MY GOD.
Jimmy: SOME MORE NEWS TODAY, FORMER TRUMP RELEASED HIS BOOK, "LETTERS TO TRUMP,"
WHICH IS A COLLECTION OF 150 PRIVATE LETTERS SENT TO HIM BY BIG NAME CELEBRITIES AND
POLITICIANS. YEAH, THE BOOK ACTUALLY FEATURES LETTERS FROM PUTIN AND
KIM JONG-UN. [ AUDIENCE OHS ] BUT KIND OF CONCERNING THEY'RE
VALENTINE'S DAY CARDS. Steve: REALLY [ LAUGHTER ]
THE BOOK EVEN CONTAINS A LETTER FROM HILLARY CLINTON WELL, TECHNICALLY IT'S LETTERS
CUT OUT OF VARIOUS MAGAZINES AND GLUED ON OF COURSE, EVERYONE IS STILL
TALKING ABOUT TUCKER CARLSON'S ABRUPT EXIT FROM FOX NEWS. WELL, EVERYONE EXCEPT FOX NEWS
[ LAUGHTER ] YEP, TUCKER CARLSON HAS LEFT FOX NEWS
WHEN ASKED ABOUT THE SPLIT, TUCKER HAD SOME VERY
INTERESTING THINGS TO SAY. CHECK THIS OUT
♪ I'M TELLING YOU
WE WE ARE NEVER EVER EVE GETTING BACK TOGETHE WE WE ARE NEVER EVER EVER ♪
♪ GETTING BACK TOGETHER YOU GO TALK TO YOUR FRIENDS
TALK TO MY FRIENDS ♪ ♪ TALK TO M BUT WE WE AR
NEVER EVER EVE GETTING BACK TOGETHER ♪ Jimmy: THERE YOU GO
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE THANKS FOR CLEARING THAT UP. WELL, SOME BIG NEWS FROM THE
SPORTS WORLD AFTER MONTHS OF SPECULATION, AARON RODGERS IS COMING TO THE
NEW YORK JETS! [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE RIGHT AFTER THE TRADE, JETS
PLAYERS CALLED THEIR FAMILIES LIKE, "I MIGHT GO TO THE SUPER BOWL AS A PLAYER THIS YEAR."
[ LAUGHTER ] LISTEN TO THIS, GUYS I READ THAT AT KING CHARLES'
CORONATION, PRINCE HARRY WILL SIT TEN ROWS BACK FROM THE ROYAL FAMILY
[ AUDIENCE GROANS WHICH MAKES ME WONDER, WHO ARE THEY GOING TO PUT IN THE FRONT
ROW? WELL, WE CAN FIGURE IT OUT NOW LET'S CHECK OUT THE SEATING
CHART HERE OKAY IN THE FRONT ROW, I BET IT'S
CAMILLA, WILLIAM, AND KATE, TWO OF THEIR KIDS, GEORGE, AND CHARLOTTE.
OKAY NOT BAD. [ LAUGHTER ]
ALL RIGHT. ALL RIGHT. LET ME TRY -
LET ME TRY CAMILLA, PRIME MINISTER RISHI SUNAK, PRINCE EDWARD, GEORGE, AND LOUIS.
[ LAUGHTER ] OKAY, ALL RIGHT. GETTING CLOSER, GETTING CLOSER
LET'S GO WITH CAMILLA, OBVIOUSLY. PRESIDENT OF IRELAND, MAYBE?
RISHI, GEORGE, AND THEN THE GERMAN CHANCELLOR, OLAF SCHOLZ OKAY
OH, I THINK I GET IT NOW IT'S C-O-R-G-I [ LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE
LET'S GO YES, WE DID IT YES.
THE CORGI, GOT IT IN FOUR! ♪ GOT IT IN FOUR
COME ON! TODAY'S GOING TO BE A GOOD DAY Steve: COME ON.
Jimmy: WELL, SOME BUSINESS NEWS YELP IS NOW LETTING USERS ADD
VIDEOS TO THEIR REVIEWS. [ AUDIENCE GROANS NOW EVERY REVIEW IS LIKE, "THE
FOOD WAS GOOD, BUT THE SERVERS WERE STIFF IN FRONT OF THE CAMERA
ONE STAR." [ LAUGHTER ] WELL, THIS IS COOL, RESEARCHERS
HAVE CREATED THE FIRST ROBOT THAT IS ABLE TO SNIFF ODORS. YEAH, APPARENTLY, IT'S A
A BRAND-NEW TECHNOLOGY BUT A LOT OF PEOPLE ARE SAYING GEORGE LUCAS PREDICTED IT BACK
IN ONE OF THE OLD "STAR WARS" MOVIES
TAKE A LOOK AT THE SCENE WITH C-3PO.
FUNNY.
IS IT BECAUSE YOU JUST ATE TACO BELL PERHAPS YOUR STOMACH IS NOT
ENTIRELY STABLE. NOT ENTIRELY STABLE I'M GLAD YOU'RE HERE TO TELL US
THESE THINGS CHEWIE, TAKE THE PROFESSOR IN THE BACK AND PLUG HIM INTO THE
HYPER DRIVE. I TOLD YOU NOT TO GET THE CRUNCHWRAP SUPREME
[ LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE Jimmy: HEY, GUYS, I SAW THAT THERE'S A NEW INVENTION TO HELP
PROTECT MOTORCYCLISTS ON THE ROAD WATCH THIS
ROAD WATCH THIS
INVENTED TO KEEP RIDERS SAFE FROM FALLS DURING AN ACCIDENT
OR CRASH THEY COME WITH CO2 CARTRIDGES THAT INFLATE THE AIR BAGS.
[ LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE [ RIM SHOT ] Jimmy: YEP.
THEY'RE PART OF A NEW LINE OF SAFETY GEAR FROM SAM SMITH IT'S VERY INTERESTING.
[ LAUGHTER ] AND FINALLY, BEFORE WE MOVE ON, I'D LIKE TO TAKE A MOMENT TO
THANK SOME OF OUR SPONSORS FOR TONIGHT'S SHOW THEY DON'T ALWAYS FIT IN
COMMERCIAL BREAKS. AND WE WANT TO MAKE SURE THAT WE MENTION ALL OF THEM
IT'S TIME FOR "TONIGHT SHOW SPONSORS." HERE WE GO
TONIGHT SHOW SPONSORS ♪ [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE
Jimmy: SWEDISH FISH, REMEMBER WHEN GUMMIES DIDN'T GET YOU HIGH
[ LAUGHTER ] INSTAGRAM REELS, FIND OUT WHAT HAPPENED ON TIKTOK TWO MONTHS
AGO, TODAY BOSE, LET EVERYONE ON THE SUBWAY KNOW THAT YOU'RE THE ONE
THEY SHOULD ROB. VEGGIE STRAWS, YUM, AIR! ZILLOW, IF YOU CAN'T BUY
SOMEONE'S HOUSE, AT LEAST YOU CAN JUDGE IT [ LAUGHTER ]
HOLIDAY INN EXPRESS, IT'S CALLED EXPRESS BECAUSE-- ACTUALLY, WE DON'T KNOW WHY
EITHER [ LAUGHTER ] SPIRIT HALLOWEEN, NOW COMING TO
A FORMER BED BATH & BEYOND NEAR YOU. [ LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE
POP-TARTS, FOR WHEN IT'S DAD'S TURN TO MAKE BREAKFAST [ LAUGHTER ]
ADT, WE WILL PROTECT EVERYTHING YOU OWN WITH THIS YARD SIGN. [ LAUGHTER ]
BIRDS EYE FROZEN PEAS, THE ONLY ICE PACK YOU CAN EAT [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ]
EMERGEN-C, THE THING YOU DRINK TO KEEP FROM GETTING SICK AFTER YOU DEFINITELY ALREADY FEEL
SICK [ LAUGHTER ] AMAZON KINDLE, FOR WHEN YOU
DON'T WANT EVERYONE ELSE ON THE PLANE TO KNOW YOU'RE READING SMUT
[ LAUGHTER ] AND FINALLY, TWITTER, THE NUMBER ONE PLATFORM FOR
ANNOUNCING YOU'RE LEAVING TWITTER. THAT'S ALL FOR "TONIGHT SHOW
SPONSORS." WE HAVE A GREAT SHOW JUDE LAW IS HERE TONIGHT
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE JOSHUA JACKSON IS JOINING US [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE
AND WE GOT A REALLY FUNNY STAND-UP COMEDIAN, JACKIE FABULOUS IS HERE
TONIGHT! STICK AROUND WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK WITH
"WETWEET." COME ON BACK, EVERYBODY.
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ♪
"IF YOU DROP A BOTTLE OF OLIVE
OIL AND IT SHATTERS ON THE FLOOR, IT'S PROBABLY EASIER TO JUST MOVE TO A NEW HOUSE."
[ LAUGHTER ] ♪ Steve: "LET'S GO, KIDS.
COME ON! COME ON! Jimmy: "THAT'S IT
I DON'T KNOW WHERE TO START. I DON'T KNOW WHERE TO START. Jimmy: WELCOME BACK,
EVERYBODY. [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE AW, I LOVE YOU
I LOVE YOU RIGHT BACK. [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE THANK YOU.
IT IS-- IT IS TUESDAY IT IS TIME FOR WETWEET HERE WE GO
WETWEET ♪ Jimmy: WELCOME TO WETWEET
THIS IS WHERE WE, AS A GROUP, DECIDE SOMETHING THAT WE SHOULD POST ON TWITTER.
I'M GONNA SHOW YOU FIVE DIFFERENT TWEETS WE'RE ALL GOING TO VOTE ON
WHETHER YOU LIKE EACH ONE OR NOT. YOU ALL HAVE VOTING CLICKERS AT
YOUR SEATS YOU-- FIND 'EM THERE? YEAH
YOU CAN VOTE FOR ALL OF THEM YOU CAN VOTE FOR NONE OF THEM. WHATEVER YOU WANT.
AND WE'RE GONNA SEE THE RESULTS LIVE HIGGINS, ROOTS, YOU GUYS HAVE
YOUR CLICKERS? Steve: GOT IT Jimmy: THAT'S GOOD.
WHATEVER TWEET GETS THE MOST LIKES, WE WILL ALL TWEET IT OUT LIVE ON THE SHOW, SO THAT YOU
CAN ALL LIKE AT HOME AND WETWEET IT Steve: AH
[ AUDIENCE AHS ] Jimmy: IT'S LIKE A SHARED EXPERIENCE
ALL RIGHT, YOU GUYS READY FOR THIS Audience: YES
Jimmy: ARE YOU READY FOR THIS [ CHEERS ]
ALL RIGHT, THE FIRST TWEET IS, "MIDDLE NAMES WERE JUST CREATED SO OUR MOTHERS WOULD HAVE
SOMETHING TO YELL WHEN THEY'RE MAD AT US. [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ]
"JAMES THOMAS FALLON GET IN HERE! ♪
Steve: I'M GONNA SAY YES. Jimmy: "FINISH THE JOB! [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ]
♪ ALL RIGHT, LET'S SEE THE VOTES ARE IN
LET'S SEE THE RESULTS ON THIS. [ DRUMROLL ] OKAY, ALL RIGHT.
♪ [ SCATTERED CHEERS ] VERY HONEST-- VERY HONEST
AUDIENCE Steve: YEAH Jimmy: YEAH
DIDN'T NECESSARILY - Steve: THAT WAS LIKE BODY TEMPERATURE-- 98.
Jimmy: DIDN'T NECESSARILY LOVE IT. Steve: NO
DIDN'T HATE IT Jimmy: DIDN'T HATE IT EITHER
Steve: BUT JUST DIDN'T CARE FOR IT Jimmy: IT WAS JUST LUKEWARM
Steve: YEAH, YEAH Jimmy: IT'S ALL RIGHT Steve: THAT'S A TWEET
SURE Jimmy: WELL-- YEAH [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ]
LET'S TRY THIS NEXT ONE. THE NEXT ONE SAYS-- [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ]
"I MOSTLY WATCH HOME RENOVATION SHOWS TO SEE A MARRIAGE FALL APART OVER GRANITE
COUNTERTOPS. [ LAUGHTER ] ♪
"I DON'T KNOW, HONEY I DON'T-- I DON'T THINK WE CAN AFFORD THIS.
I-- I THINK WE GO WITH THE BACKYARD FIRST DON'T WORRY ABOUT THE
COUNTERTOPS. I DON'T THINK WE--" ♪
Steve: "WHAT? Jimmy: "I'M NOT EVEN GONNA BUY THIS HOUSE
YOU KNOW HOW EXPENSIVE THAT THING IS GONNA BE? [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ]
"THAT'S LIKE $300. [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] "THERE'S NO WAY I'M BUYING,
EVER." "WE'LL TAKE IT WE'LL TAKE THE HOUSE."
[ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] Steve: "WE'RE TAKING HOUSE NUMBER TWO."
Jimmy: ALL RIGHT. I FEEL BETTER ABOUT THIS ONE Steve: I FEEL REALLY GOOD
[ DRUMROLL ] Jimmy: LET'S SEE THE RESULTS ON THIS.
YEAH, ALL RIGHT! Steve: WHOA [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE
♪ Steve: WOW. Jimmy: I FELT GOOD ABOUT
THAT ONE LET'S TRY THIS NEXT ONE HERE THIS NEXT ONE SAYS, "YOU KNOW
THE GUY WHO INVENTED THE FIRST TELESCOPE JUST PRETENDED HE WAS LOOKING AT STARS."
[ LAUGHTER ] ♪ Steve: "WHAT?
OOPS." Jimmy: "OOH, SOMEONE'S GETTING' A NEW BIKINI.
[ LAUGHTER ] ♪ LET'S SEE THE RESULTS HERE
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE Steve: OH Jimmy: NOT AS MUCH.
Steve: WOW. NO, THEY DIDN'T CARE FOR THAT ONE.
Jimmy: NO, THEY LIKED IT. Steve: WELL, LIKED IT, BUT--
Jimmy: IT'S NOT AS-- Steve: NOT AS MUCH. Jimmy: THIS ONE FEELS PRETTY
GOOD Steve: THE NEXT ONE FEELS GOOD
Jimmy: WELL, I LIKED THE OTHER ONE. THE RENOVATION ONE WAS GOOD.
Steve: YEAH, THAT WAS GOOD. Jimmy: YEAH, BUT I THINK THIS NEXT ONE--
Steve: YOU THINK THIS NEXT ONE-- Jimmy: THEY DON'T
NECESSARILY GET BETTER Steve: NO Jimmy: THAT'S THE SAD THING
[ LAUGHTER ] Steve: AND YOU DIDN'T MAKE A TELESCOPE LOOKING AT URANUS
JOKE, WHICH WAS GOOD [ LAUGHTER ] I'M PROUD OF YOU
Jimmy: NOT MY TYPE OF HUMOR-- Steve: I KNOW
I'M PROUD OF YOU FOR DOING THAT YEAH
[ LAUGHTER ] Jimmy: NEXT UP-- [ LAUGHTER ]
"IF YOU DROP A BOTTLE OF OLIVE OIL AND IT SHATTERS ON THE FLOOR, IT'S PROBABLY EASIER TO
JUST MOVE TO A NEW HOUSE." [ LAUGHTER ] ♪
Steve: "LET'S GO, KIDS. COME ON! COME ON!
Jimmy: "THAT'S IT I DON'T KNOW WHERE TO START. I DON'T KNOW WHERE TO START.
LET'S JUST GET A NEW--" "YOU DON'T HAVE GRANITE COUNTERTOPS, DO YOU?
[ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] "IF WE DIDN'T HAVE GRANITE, WE WOULDN'T HAVE BROKEN THE OLIVE
OIL. ♪ ALL RIGHT.
I THINK THIS IS GOING TO BE THE WINNER EVERYONE VOTED
ALL RIGHT, LET'S SEE THE RESULTS. [ DRUMROLL ]
YEAH, THERE WE GO. Steve: WOW. ♪
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE Steve: WOW. Jimmy: THAT'S PRETTY GOOD
Steve: GOT SOME WINNERS Jimmy: YEAH, THAT WAS GOOD. THIS LAST ONE'S GOOD TOO, BUT I
THINK THAT ONE IS GONNA BE THE WINNER BUT THIS LAST ONE'S FUNNY, TOO
ALL RIGHT, HERE WE GO. THIS LAST ONE SAYS, "PEOPLE WHO TRY TO GET OFF THE PLANE OUT OF
ORDER ARE THE REASON WE CAN'T HAVE NICE THINGS." [ LAUGHTER ]
JUST STAY SEATED Steve: COME ON! Jimmy: WE'RE EVENTUALLY ALL
GONNA GET OFF THE PLANE. TRUST ME NO ONE'S EVER JUST FORGOTTEN
Steve: "WHERE ARE THEY? WE FORGOT 'EM! Jimmy: "THEY FORGOT TO TO
OPEN THE--" NO, THAT'S NEVER HAPPENED. WE'RE ALL GOING TO LEAVE
EVENTUALLY ALL RIGHT. LET'S SEE THE RESULTS ON THIS
ONE HERE [ DRUMROLL ] BAM!
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] E >> Steve: WHOA! ♪
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ALL RIGHT, WE GOT A WINNER RIGHT THERE!
I'M GONNA POST THIS-- [ BELL DINGING ] - - DURING THE COMMERCIAL BREAK
IF YOU SEE IT ON YOUR FEED, GIVE IT A LIKE, GIVE IT A WETWEET AND ENJOY.
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE STICK AROUND, WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK WITH JUDE LAW
COME ON BACK [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ♪
Jimmy: YEAH I'VE WORKED WITH SOME--
SOME PARTICULARLY RESPECTABLE ACTORS LIKE I WAS WHEN I MET A JAWA
Jimmy: YEAH [ LAUGHTER ] I'M NOT JOKING.
Jimmy: YES. I SAW A JAWA WALKING BY - Jimmy: YOU'RE LIKE--
[ BABBLING ] "AH, I CAN'T BELIEVE IT." Jimmy: "OH, MY GOSH!"
"IT'S A REAL JAWA!" Jimmy: "IT'S A REAL JAWA! OH, MY GOSH.
YEAH, YEAH. Jimmy: OUR FIRST GUEST STARS AS CAPTAIN HOOK IN THE NEW
MOVIE "PETER PAN & WENDY," WHICH IS STREAMING EXCLUSIVELY ON DISNEY+ THIS FRIDAY
EVERYONE, PLEASE WELCOME JUDE LAW
♪ [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE Jimmy: COME ON.
THEY LOVE YOU! THAT'S GOTTA FEEL GOOD, BUD. WELCOME BACK TO THE SHOW
I ALWAYS LOVE SEEING YOU HERE. THANKS FOR COMING BACK I LOVE BEING HERE
IT'S GREAT TO BE BACK. Jimmy: I GOT-- WHEN I SAID HI TO YOU, I GOT MUSTACHE ENVY
IMMEDIATELY. I GO - [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ]
"THAT IS A-- THAT IS A REAL 'STACHE. LOOK AT THAT THING
IT IS REAL. Jimmy: YEAH, I WAS GONNA SAY--
YEAH, WOW. I MEAN, IS IT-- IS IT - NEW 'STACHE, NEW JOB, YOU
KNOW Jimmy: OKAY, SO THIS IS FOR A MOVIE, YEAH.
IT'S FOR A MOVIE. Jimmy: OH PLAYING A-- A COP IN THE
'80s, IN A FILM CALLED "THE ORDER" WHICH I START IN A A COUPLE OF WEEKS.
Jimmy: WOW. DO YOU LIKE THAT BETTER THAN A A FAKE MUSTACHE?
YEAH, FOR SURE. I WORE-- I WORE A FAKE-- LIKE, BEARD OR MUSTACHE MAYBE
ONCE IT WAS LIKE, YOU KNOW-- IT'S LIKE ACTING THROUGH A RUG.
AND YOU CAN'T-- [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] YOU CAN'T REALLY-- YOU CAN'T
SMILE PARTICULARLY SO YEAH. Jimmy: YOU CAN'T REALLY -
[ MUMBLING ] I LIKE GROWING THEM IN. Jimmy: "HEY, STOP, STOP
POLICE." "THAT'S RIGHT." Jimmy: "DON'T MOVE.
[ LAUGHTER ] "FREEZE, FREEZE. AND THE SMILES, BECAUSE YOU
GET THE-- PING! Jimmy: PING! IT POPS OFF, YEAH
[ LAUGHTER ] YEAH, YEAH. Jimmy: I RECENTLY, I--
'CAUSE I-- I JUST WANT TO SHOW YOU HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO GROW A MUSTACHE.
THIS IS MY SENIOR YEARBOOK PHOTO. AND IT'S -
[ CHEERS AND LAUGHTER CAN YOU SEE IT CAN YOU ZOOM IN?
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE THAT'S A REAL-- THAT'S THAT AGE-- THAT'S
THAT AGE WHERE - THAT-- THAT TAKES MONTHS. [ LAUGHTER ]
Jimmy: THAT WAS COMMITMENT. YOU'RE LIKE - [ STRAINING
Jimmy: YEAH, AND IF THE WIND BLOWS, IT JUST KINDA BLOWS IN THE WIND
[ LAUGHTER ] IT'S A VERY WISPY FREE MUSTACHE
I WANTED TO-- I JUST GREW THIS OVER NIGHT Jimmy: NO, THAT'S A
A FANTASTIC ONE. THAT IS A SOLID-- I WANT TO ASK YOU ABOUT THIS,
'CAUSE THE INTERNET IS ALL ABUZZ. YOU JUST WRAPPED "STAR WARS:
SKELETON CREW. YES Jimmy: AND THERE'S A LOT OF
BUZZ GOING AROUND IT AND NOT A LOT-- TON OF INFORMATION ABOUT WHAT IT'S
ABOUT. AND THIS IS ALL I KNOW SO FAR--
"JUDE LAW IS IN 'STAR WARS: SKELETON CREW. AN UNNAMED JEDI ASSISTING FOUR
CHILDREN ON AN ADVENTURE." [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] THAT'S VAGUE
THAT'S-- THAT'S ONE PERSPECTIVE. [ LAUGHTER ]
Jimmy: WOW. IT'S-- Jimmy: KEEP-- I'M
INTRIGUED. IT-- THAT SOUNDS GOOD. [ LAUGHTER ]
Jimmy: YOU'RE NOT REALLY ALLOWED TO TALK MUCH NOT MUCH.
THERE ARE WONDERFUL, AS YOU CAN IMAGINE, TWISTS AND TURNS AND REVEALS AND--
Jimmy: ARE THERE FOUR CHILDREN THERE ARE FOUR CHILDREN
Jimmy: OKAY [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] THEY ARE BETWEEN THE AGES OF
10 AND 12. THEY GET LOST. THEY COME FROM A KIND OF
MYSTERIOUS PLANET. THEY GET BLASTED OFF AND LOST IN THE WORLD OF "STAR WARS."
AND JON WATTS, THE BRILLIANT DIRECTOR OF THE LAST "SPIDER-MAN" TRILOGY, HE HEADED
UP THE DIRECTORS AND HE-- YEAH, IT-- IT'S GOT A LITTLE MORE--
WHAT THEY DESCRIBED IT AS IS A A LITTLE MORE AMBLING. MEANING, YOU KNOW, IT'S AN
ADVENTURE OF KIDS, BUT IT'S NOT IN THE KIDS WORLD. THE-- THE JEOPARDY IS REAL.
Jimmy: YEAH UM, AND IT WAS A BLAST. Jimmy: THOSE-- WHAT IT'S
LIKE BEING ON THOSE GIANT-- THOSE SETS, THOSE "STAR WARS" SETS
THE THING I UNDERESTIMATED WAS THE EXPERIENCE OF-- OF ACTING OPPOSITE DROIDS AND
CREATURES, WHICH OF COURSE ARE ALL THERE. AND SO, YOU GET TO WORK WITH
'TIMES, YOU KNOW, FIVE, SIX, SEVEN PUPPETEERS AND THESE PEOPLE ARE MASTERS
SO, YOU-- YOU KNOW, YOUR CONVERSATIONS ARE LIKE "OH, WHO DOES THE LEFT ARM?
OKAY, YOU DO LEFT ARM. SO, DO YOU WANT TO PUT THE LEFT ARM LIKE HERE, OR WHEN YOU LOOK
AT ME-- " AND IT'S A REALLY WEIRD, DIFFERENT TYPE OF ACTING, BUT
IT'S FUN Jimmy: IT'S FASCINATING AND THEN, OF COURSE, YOU
GOTTA PINCH YOURSELF 'CAUSE YOU'RE SAT THERE SURROUNDED BY THIS WEIRD CREATURE, AND THIS
OTHER CREATURE Jimmy: YEAH YEAH, YOU'RE LIKE, "AM I--"
AND THIS ROBOT AND YOU'RE DOING A REALLY SERIOUS SCENE, LIKE -
AND OF COURSE, THE - Jimmy: IT'S ALMOST LIKE FANTASY CAMP
TOTALLY Jimmy: RIGHT? YOU'RE LIKE, "I CAN'T BELIEVE I
GET TO DO THIS." I GOT - I'VE BEEN VERY LUCKY
Jimmy: YEAH I'VE WORKED WITH SOME-- SOME PARTICULARLY RESPECTABLE
ACTORS BUT I'VE NEVER BEEN STARSTRUCK LIKE I WAS WHEN I MET A JAWA
Jimmy: YEAH [ LAUGHTER ] I'M NOT JOKING.
Jimmy: YES. I SAW A JAWA WALKING BY - Jimmy: YOU'RE LIKE--
[ BABBLING ] "AH, I CAN'T BELIEVE IT." Jimmy: "OH, MY GOSH!"
"IT'S A REAL JAWA!" Jimmy: "IT'S A REAL JAWA! OH, MY GOSH.
YEAH, YEAH. Jimmy: IS JON FAVREAU INVOLVED WITH THIS ONE
YES Jimmy: OH, HE IS. HE'S BACK, YEAH
Jimmy: HE'S FANTASTIC, MAN. HE IS Jimmy: I LIKE THAT GUY.
HE PUTS HIS ALL-- AND HE'S GOT A WONDERFUL FAMILY FEEL IN MANHATTAN BEACH
WHERE WE SHOT IT THERE WERE A COUPLE OF OTHER PROJECTS GOING ON.
YEAH, IT WAS-- IT WAS A REALLY WONDERFUL, UH, EXPERIENCE. I HOPE YOU ALL HAVE THE SAME
EXPERIENCE WATCHING IT Jimmy: YEAH [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE
WE'RE EXCITED. IT'LL BE GOOD. THANK YOU
Jimmy: I WANT TO TALK ABOUT "PETER PAN & WENDY." YEAH.
Jimmy: YOU WERE ALMOST UNRECOGNIZABLE AS CAPTAIN HOOK MM.
Jimmy: THERE YOU ARE THERE. [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE DASTARDLY
Jimmy: YEAH DASTARDLY Jimmy: DASTARDLY IS RIGHT,
YEAH THAT'S A FUN CALL TO GET THROUGH, HUH
AGAIN, SPEAKING OF KIND OF, LIKE, KIND OF DREAMS - I MEAN, "STAR WARS," OBVIOUSLY
BUT ALSO, "PETER PAN" AND DISNEY YEAH.
Jimmy: I MEAN, THAT'S - IT WAS A LITTLE DAUNTING. FILLING SOME BIG BOOTS
Jimmy: YEAH, SOME GREAT ACTORS HAVE PLAYED - REALLY GREAT ACTORS
BUT THIS-- THERE WAS A GREAT TAKE IN THIS SCRIPT WHERE YOU UNDERSTAND A LITTLE MORE ABOUT
WHY HOOK IS THE WAY HE IS. HOW HE CAME TO NEVERLAND THE RELATIONSHIP BETWEEN HIM
AND PETER AND HOW IT REALLY STARTED. AND SO, YOU REALLY GET INTO--
I SUPPOSE, UNDERSTANDING A A LITTLE BIT OF THE DAMAGE THAT WAS DONE TO HIM, AND WHY HE'S
QUITE AS AWFUL AS HE IS. Jimmy: I FEEL LIKE-- LIKE, IT MUST BE, LIKE, SO MUCH FUN
TO WALK ON A GIANT PIRATE SHIP AS CAPTAIN HOOK. YOU'D BE LIKE, "THAT'S RIGHT."
I MEAN IT'S - Jimmy: "YEAH. RESPECT!
[ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] IT'S UP THERE Jimmy: "RESPECT!"
IT'S UP THERE WITH-- YEAH-- AS FAR - YOU-- YOU REALIZE, I SUPPOSE,
SUDDENLY HOW EASY IT IS FOR A GROUP OF MEN DRESSED AS PIRATES TO FALL INTO THE
OPPORTUNITY-- [ LAUGHTER ] - - OF LIVING THAT FOR REAL
Jimmy: YEAH, OF COURSE. YEAH, YOU JUMP RIGHT IN. THEY ALL FELL INTO CALLING
ME CAPTAIN, WHICH I DIDN'T MIND, OF COURSE. Jimmy: NO, IT'S LIKE--
[ LAUGHTER ] LIKE, YOU SALUTE ME ALL DAY LONG
Jimmy: WERE THE KIDS-- WERE THE KIDS SCARED? WERE THEY INTIMIDATED?
SO, WE TRIED-- DAVID LOWERY, OUR WONDERFUL DIRECTOR, HAD THE IDEA OF
REALLY TRYING TO ENCOURAGE THEM NOT TO SEE ME WHEN I WASN'T HOOK
SO, I JUST STAYED AS HOOK THE WHOLE TIME WHICH WAS AN OPPORTUNITY JUST
TO BE REALLY SCARY AND MEAN. [ LAUGHTER ] SOUNDS KIND OF AWFUL
BUT IT-- YOU KNOW, YOU DIDN'T WANT-- I DIDN'T WANT SUDDENLY TO BE TALKING TO A LITTLE
6-YEAR-OLD AS JUDE, AND THEN, SUDDENLY IT'S LIKE, "RIGHT YOU HATE ME.
I'M HOOK, I'M HOOK." Jimmy: YEAH, YEAH IT'S CONFUSING
SO, INSTEAD, I JUST STUCK AS HOOK Jimmy: YEAH
AND YEAH, A LOT OF THE REACTIONS YOU SEE IN THE FILM ARE THEIR REACTIONS TO ME FOR
THE FIRST TIME OR-- OR AS THE MAN HIMSELF, YEAH
Jimmy: DID THEY EVER GET TO MEET JUDE? THEY MET JUDE AT THE END.
AND I DID WHAT EVERY ADULT SHOULD DO TO BRIBE CHILDREN. I HIRED AN ICE CREAM VAN, AND
I-- [ AUDIENCE OHS ] I DROVE IT ON-SITE
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE Jimmy: THAT'S A GOOD MAN. GIVING OUT ICE CREAM.
Jimmy: COME ON. THAT'S A GOOD-- THAT'S A GOOD MAN.
[ APPLAUSE ] THAT'S EXACTLY RIGHT NOTHING LIKE CHOCOLATE ICE
CREAM-- Jimmy: NO, NO-- TO PERSUADE A CHILD THAT
YOU'RE ALL RIGHT Jimmy: "I'M NOT THAT BAD, REALLY," YEAH.
"I WAS PLAYING A CHARACTER," YEAH AND THEN, THE HOOK IS THE-- IS
ON THE RIGHT HAND, RIGHT YEAH. I HAD TO LEARN TO FIGHT--
SWORD FIGHT WITH MY LEFT HAND. Jimmy: WOW, THAT'S A COOL SKILL.
YEAH. WELL, FIRST OF ALL, I HAD TO LEARN TO SWORD FIGHT
AND THEN IT WAS-- Jimmy: YEAH [ LAUGHTER ]
AND NOW I HAVE TO LEARN TO SWORD FIGHT-- YOU KNOW WHAT WAS SURPRISING
WAS HOW-- WHAT'S THE WORD I MEAN, JUST HOW UNSKILLED THE LEFT HAND-- MY LEFT HAND WAS.
I HAD TO DEAL WITH THESE LITTLE ROUTINES EVERY DAY FOR AN HOUR BEFORE I WAS ALLOWED TO DO
ANYTHING WITH A WEIGHT, WHERE I HAD TO JUST SORT OF LEARN TO USE--
I WAS LIKE - Jimmy: YEAH, YOU'RE LIKE, DEAD
"I'M EXHAUSTED." I HAD THIS AWFUL LEFT HAND. Jimmy: "I'M EXHAUSTED,"
YEAH YEAH. Jimmy: I HEARD THAT, LIKE,
IF YOU TRY-- IF YOU'RE RIGHT-HANDED, TRY BRUSHING YOUR TEETH WITH YOUR LEFT HAND.
THAT'S RIGHT. Jimmy: AND IT'S LIKE, APPARENTLY MIND BLOWING.
ONCE I HAD THE HOOK ON, IT WAS HARD TO TAKE IT OFF BECAUSE IT WAS UNDER ALL THESE LAYERS,
AND IT WAS STRAPPED ON, AND WHAT HAVE YOU. SO, I MILKED THAT ALL DAY LONG
BECAUSE-- EVEN-- I CAN FIGHT WITH MY LEFT HAND, BUT, "OHH, CAN YOU
PASS ME THE-- " [ LAUGHTER ] Jimmy: SMART MAN!
"PASS ME THE CUP OF TEA." Jimmy: YEAH, YEAH, YEAH I WANT TO SHOW EVERYONE A CLIP
HERE'S JUDE LAW IN "PETER PAN & WENDY.
♪ [ FOOTSTEPS AND WOOD CREAKING SORRY, CAPTAIN.
MR. SMEE? ♪ SMEE, MAKE A NOTE MY CABIN
NEEDS A NEW DOOR A NEW DOOR, YES RIGHT.
MIGHT I SAY, CAPTAIN, THAT WILL BE YOUR THIRD DOOR THIS MONTH. AND IT WON'T BE THE LAST.
WHERE'S MY TELESCOPE ♪ TELESCOPE!
SMEE ♪ TELESCOPE AT HAND, CAPTAIN.
♪ SPEAK NOT TO ME OF HANDS, SMEE
I SEE YOUR POINT. Jimmy: THAT'S WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT, THERE
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE JUDE LAW, EVERYBODY! "PETER PAN & WENDY" IS
STREAMING EXCLUSIVELY ON DISNEY+ THIS FRIDAY. JOSHUA JACKSON JOINS US AFTER
THE BREAK. STICK AROUND, EVERYBODY. [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE
♪ Jimmy: OUR NEXT GUEST STARS IN THE NEW SERIES
"FATAL ATTRACTION," WHICH BEGINS STREAMING SUNDAY ON
PARAMOUNT+ PLEASE WELCOME JOSHUA JACKSON!
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE
♪ ♪ [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE
Jimmy: WELCOME BACK THANK YOU, THANK YOU. GOOD TO BE BACK.
Jimmy: THANK YOU FOR BEING HERE YOU WERE-- YOU WERE TRENDING
ON TWITTER RECENTLY. AND-- YOU KNOW WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT?
I DO, ONLY BECAUSE-- I MEAN IF-- WHEN THAT HAPPENS TO YOU-- I FEEL LIKE IT HAPPENS
TO YOU MORE THAN IT HAPPENS TO ME BUT WHEN IT HAPPENED TO ME, I
FELT LIKE I MUST HAVE DONE SOMETHING TERRIBLE Jimmy: YEAH
[ LAUGHTER ] I IMMEDIATELY REVERTED TO A A FIVE YEAR OLD.
LIKE "WHAT DID I DO? Jimmy: "WHAT'D I DO?" "WHAT DID I DO?
WHAT DID THEY FIND OUT?" Jimmy: "I DID SOMETHING WRONG," YEAH
"I KNOW I DIDN'T DIE." YEAH, EXACTLY [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ]
I'M STILL HERE, SO THAT'S GOOD Jimmy: "I'M STILL HERE, OKAY, YEAH."
THAT'S GOOD Jimmy: YEAH SO-- WHAT WAS YOUR TAKE ON
THIS WELL, MY TAKE WAS, TRY TO PUT ON THE COOL FACE
WENT, "OH, REALLY? THAT-- FOR-- FOR-- WHY? [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ]
Jimmy: WHO LET YOU KNOW-- WHO LET YOU KNOW THAT YOU'RE TRENDING
IT WAS ONE OF THE GRIPS ON SET. HE'S LIKE, "HEY, MAN, YOU'RE
TRENDING ON TWITTER. AND THEN HE WENT OFF TO DO HIS THING.
AND I WAS LIKE - Jimmy: "MY CAREER'S OVER. "I'LL BE RIGHT BACK!"
[ LAUGHTER ] Jimmy: YEAH YOU WERE TRENDING BECAUSE OF A
A VERY SPECIFIC SCENE THAT YOU SHOT ON "DAWSON'S CREEK" - YEAH.
Jimmy:-- MANY YEARS AGO. YEAH. [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE
ALL RIGHT. Jimmy: SOMEONE TWEETED ABOUT IT AND WAS VERY CONFUSED
WE ACTUALLY HAVE THE CLIP. LET'S TAKE A LOOK.
OOMPA-LOOMPA HEY, LADIES, I REALLY LOVE WHAT YOU DID WITH THAT LAST CHEER
AH OHH [ AUDIENCE OHS ]
OHH [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE Jimmy: SO -
DAMN. Jimmy: SO DID THE BALL HIT THE CAMERA AFTER IT HIT YOUR
FACE THE BALL HIT THE CAMERA AFTER IT HIT MY FACE
AND THEY LOVED IT SO MUCH THAT THEY-- I THINK WE DID TWO OR THREE MORE TAKES IS MY
RECOLLECTION [ LAUGHTER ] SOMEBODY HAD SOME ISSUES THEY
WERE TRYING TO WORK OUT WITH ME Jimmy: NOW WAS IT SUPPOSED
TO DO THAT NEVER SUPPOSED TO DO THAT AND THEN HERE'S-- SO--
YOU KNOW TWITTER HAS ITS UPS AND DOWNS, BUT ONE OF THE THINGS I LOVE ABOUT TWITTER IS,
MAN, PEOPLE GET INTO IT. SO WHEN I DID FINALLY GET BACK TO MY TRAILER, I REALIZED I
HADN'T SCREWED UP AND I WASN'T DEAD Jimmy: YEAH
[ LAUGHTER ] AND MY CAREER WASN'T OVER Jimmy: YEAH
ALL GOOD THINGS Jimmy: YES. THERE'S LIKE A FORENSIC
ANALYSIS OF THIS 25-YEAR-OLD TV SHOW [ LAUGHTER ]
IT WAS CG, SOMEONE'S GOING FRAME-BY-FRAME - "WELL, YOU CAN SEE HE DODGED
THE BALL AT THE WRONG TIME, SO THE BALL'S NOT--" [ LAUGHTER ]
THIS WAS JUST A BEACHBALL PAINTED TO LOOK LIKE A A BASKETBALL THAT GOT BOUNCED
OFF MY FACE. [ LAUGHTER ] Jimmy: THAT'S-- THERE YOU
GO HATE TO BREAK IT TO YOU, TWITTER.
Jimmy: THAT'S THE TRICK [ APPLAUSE ] SO IT DIDN'T HURT?
I MEAN, IT DIDN'T FEEL GREAT. Jimmy: IT DIDN'T FEEL GREAT,
YEAH THIS IS NOT AMAZING Jimmy: AFTER THREE TAKES--
YEAH. Jimmy:-- YOU'RE LIKE, "I THINK WE GOT IT.
RIGHT, EVERYONE? AND ALSO I'M LIKE 19, SO, YOU KNOW, YOU'RE LIKE--
[ VOICE CRACKING ] "I'M FINE. [ LAUGHTER ]
Jimmy: "LET'S DO IT AGAIN, LET'S DO IT AGAIN. "EVERYTHING'S COOL.
THROW IT HARDER, MAN!" Jimmy: "THROW IT HARDER USE A REAL BASKETBALL THIS
TIME, MAN. YEAH [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ]
YOU ALSO BROKE THE INTERNET AGAIN DURING THIS PAST HALLOWEEN.
YOU WERE PHOTOGRAPHED GOING TO A HALLOWEEN PARTY DRESSED AS CHARLIE CONWAY FROM
"MIGHTY DUCKS. THIS IS YOUR CHARACTER [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE
YOUR CHARACTER DO YOU KEEP A CHARLIE CONWAY JERSEY IN YOUR -
ACTUALLY, THIS IS MY LOVELY WIFE'S CHARLIE CONWAY JERSEY THAT SHE KEEPS IN HER CLOSET
FOR OCCASIONS SUCH AS THIS [ AUDIENCE AWS ] Jimmy: BUT I LOVE THAT
SHE-- 'CAUSE SHE ALWAYS-- SHE KIND OF DOES THIS ON PURPOSE, SHE WEARS PACEY T-SHIRTS AND
STUFF? YEAH, WELL-- THERE'S A A NOTORIOUS PACEY T-SHIRT AS
WELL THAT SHE HAS, THAT IS MY FACE IN RAY-BANS - Jimmy: YEAH
- THAT SHE CUT INTO A CROP TOP. [ LAUGHTER ]
AND I'M SHOOTING IN WILMINGTON RIGHT NOW. AND THE FIRST DAY I WAS WORKING
WHEN SHE GOT IN, AND I COME BACK HOME, AND SHE'S LIKE, "DON'T WORRY, I'M JUST AT
TARGET GRABBING SOME STUFF." AND I COME HOME AND SHE'S HER, IN THE CROP TOP PACEY SHIRT.
AND I'M LIKE, "BABE, YOU CAN'T WEAR THAT HERE." [ LAUGHTER ]
LIKE, "NOT HERE. Jimmy: YEAH, THERE-- SHE CAN DO WHATEVER SHE WANTS,
YEAH DID PEOPLE FREAK WHEN THEY SAW THE COSTUME?
YEAH, THE-- WELL, THIS IS SUPER NAME-DROP-Y, BUT I FOUND OUT SOMETHING VERY IMPORTANT
MARGOT ROBBIE, BIG "MIGHTY DUCKS" FAN Jimmy: WOW!
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE SHE WAS AT THAT PARTY AND SHE WAS LIKE -
SHE TURNED AROUND AND FOR THE-- THE FIRST THING SHE SAW WAS THE JERSEY
SHE'S LIKE, "OH, MY GOD, I LOVE THAT MOVIE." AND THEN SHE LOOKED UP AND WAS
LIKE, "OH, I GET IT. [ LAUGHTER ] Jimmy: "AH, REALLY GOOD
COSTUME, REALLY GOOD." THAT'S VERY COOL I WANT TO TALK ABOUT
"FATAL ATTRACTION. YES, PLEASE Jimmy: IT'S A BIG DEAL,
BUDDY. THIS IS THE TV ADAPTATION OF THE HIT MOVIE, BUT THIS IS TOLD
IN A DIFFERENT WAY THAN THE MOVIE. A DIFFERENT WAY AND A
A DIFFERENT TIME SO THE MOVIE IS MADE AND SET IN 1987.
OUR TV SHOW IS MADE IN 2 2023 AND SET IN 20 2008 AND 2023, WHICH MOSTLY
GIVES US THE OPPORTUNITY - WELL, ONE, IT'S TV, RIGHT? SO WE HAVE MORE TIME
Jimmy: OH, YEAH AND IF YOU WATCH THE ORIGINAL MOVIE, IT'S AN AMAZING
FILM, BUT THE CULTURE HAS MOVED, RIGHT THERE'S JUST SOME THINGS THAT
YOU COULDN'T GET AWAY WITH NOW, EVEN IF YOU TRIED. SO WE HAD THE OPPORTUNITY TO
REALLY DELVE INTO THIS ICONIC CHARACTER OF ALEX FORREST, AND EXPLAIN A LITTLE BIT OF LIKE,
WHY SHE IS, AND WHAT MADE HER INTO THE WOMAN THAT SHE IS AND THEN ON THE DAN SIDE, MY
CHARACTER'S SIDE, WE HAVE AN OPPORTUNITY TO SHOW LIKE, YOU KNOW, THERE ARE CONSEQUENCES TO
YOUR ACTIONS Jimmy: YEAH [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ]
YOU WERE TELLING ME BACKSTAGE THAT YOU RAN INTO SOMEONE RECENTLY WHO'S A BIG FAN OF
HOW-- YES Jimmy:-- THE
"FATAL ATTRACTION" SERIES TURNED OUT I KNOW YOU DON'T WANT TO
NAME-DROP. NO, NO, I TOTALLY WANT TO NAME-DROP.
Jimmy: OKAY, GOOD [ LAUGHTER ] I TOTALLY-- I'M SO HAPPY
YOU BROUGHT THIS UP, 'CAUSE I WANT EVERYBODY ON THE PLANET TO KNOW THIS STORY.
Jimmy: GOOD SO-- [ LAUGHTER ]
AND IT STARTS NAME-DROP-Y AND IT ONLY GETS WORSE SO, I WAS AT THE "VANITY FAIR"
OSCAR AFTER-PARTY. Jimmy: YEAH, ALL RIGHT. [ LAUGHTER AND CHEERS
ALL RIGHT, THAT'S FINE, A LOT OF PEOPLE GO TO THAT I WAS HAVING A--
[ LAUGHTER ] I WAS HAVING A CONVERSATION WITH MULTI-OSCAR NOMINEE AND
WINNER, MICHELLE WILLIAMS, AN OLD FRIEND OF MINE [ CHEERS ]
Jimmy: NOW WE'RE GOING, NOW WE'RE TALKING. AND IN THE MIDDLE OF MY
CONVERSATION, A WOMAN WHO WORKS AT PARAMOUNT+ WHO IS PUTTING ON "FATAL ATTRACTION" CAME UP AND
SAID, "YOU KNOW, THE SHOW'S GREAT, CONGRATULATIONS AND STEVEN--"
Both: SPIELBERG - [ CHEERS ] "-- WHO IS THE PRODUCER OF
THE MOVIE, LOVES IT AND CONGRATULATIONS. AND I WAS LIKE, "OH, THAT'S
GREAT. OH, MY GOD, AMAZING, CAN'T WAIT."
AND THEN THAT CONVERSATION ENDS, AND STEVEN SPIELBERG WALKS ACROSS THE ROOM.
[ AUDIENCE OHS ] AND COMES UP TO ME AND SAYS, "JOSHUA"-- KNOWS MY FIRST
NAME [ LAUGHTER AND CHEERS "YOU ARE AMAZING IN THIS SHOW.
YOU'RE GREAT, I LOVED IT YOU AND LIZZY ARE FANTASTIC. YOUR CHEMISTRY IS INCREDIBLE."
AND HE GOES ON-- I HAVE NO IDEA HOW LONG IT WAS FOR, 'CAUSE I HAD AN OUT OF BODY
EXPERIENCE [ LAUGHTER ] I DIDN'T REALLY HEAR MUCH OF
WHAT HE SAID THEN HE FINISHES, HE WALKS AWAY, AND I HAD THIS TERRIBLE
MOMENT OF LIKE, "OH, MY GOD. I HOPE SOMEBODY THAT I KNOW WITNESSED THAT."
[ LAUGHTER ] "'CAUSE NOBODY IS EVER GOING TO BELIEVE THAT."
Jimmy: "EVER GOING TO BELIEVE-- NO, OF COURSE.
AND IT TURNS OUT MY FRIEND DOUG WAS STANDING RIGHT THERE. AND HE SAW MY FACE AND WENT,
"YEAH, YEAH, I SAW." [ LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE Jimmy: THAT'S -
AND NOW YOU ALL KNOW. Jimmy: AND NOW WE ALL KNOW. [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE
AND DOUG AND DOUG. Jimmy: I WANT TO SHOW
EVERYONE A CLIP. HERE'S STEVEN SPIELBERG'S FAVORITE PRODUCTION.
[ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] JOSHUA JACKSON IN
"FATAL ATTRACTION. TAKE A LOOK AT THIS.
[ BACKGROUND MURMURING ]
♪ HI! HI.
UM, THIS IS ALEX-- I FORGOT YOUR LAST NAME-- FORREST
ALEX FORREST, MY HUSBAND, DAN. DAN, ALEX FORREST.
NO, I KNOW HIM ALREADY. OH! FROM THE CRIMINAL COURTS.
I WORK IN VICTIM SERVICES. OH. THAT'S WITH CONCHITA, RIGHT
RIGHT WOW, ARE YOU KIDDING? YOU WERE RIGHT, BETH.
THIS PLACE, I MEAN, IT'S-- IT'S MAGICAL WELL, WE'VE BEEN VERY HAPPY
HERE ♪ YEAH, I CAN FEEL IT
THE HAPPINESS. ♪ [ NOISE OF DISTRESS
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE Jimmy: JOSHUA JACKSON, EVERYBODY!
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE "FATAL ATTRACTION" COMES TO PARAMOUNT+ ON SUNDAY
WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK WITH STAND-UP FROM JACKIE FABULOUS. COME ON BACK
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ♪ Jimmy: OUR NEXT GUEST CAN BE
SEEN AT THE HISTORIC EVERETT THEATRE IN EVERETT, WASHINGTON THIS
SATURDAY NIGHT PLEASE WELCOME, THE VERY FUNNY, JACKIE FABULOUS!
♪ HEY, GUYS
WHAT'S UP? [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE OH, I HAVE SO MANY MILESTONES
TO SHARE I'M-- I'M ABOUT TO HAVE REALLY HIGH SELF-ESTEEM THIS SUMMER
[ CHEERS ] I'M GOING TO JAMAICA TO SEE MY RELATIVES, YEAH!
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE YES. I TELL WOMEN, "IF YOU WANT TO
KNOW HOW GOOD YOU LOOK, HOW HOT YOU ARE? GO TO THE CARIBBEAN, ANY
ISLAND, YOU'LL KNOW HOW YOU LOOK, OKAY?" I'M VERY SELF-AWARE.
I KNOW I'M LIKE A LIFE-SIZED CABBAGE PATCH DOLL I GET IT, RIGHT?
[ LAUGHTER ] I USED TO LIVE IN CALIFORNIA ON THAT MAN SCALE, ONE TO TEN,
I KNOW I'M A SIX, I GET IT, RIGHT? [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ]
IN NEW YORK, I'M AN EIGHT, I CAN COOK YA'LL LIKE THAT, OKAY?
[ LAUGHTER ] BUT IN JAMAICA, I'M BEYONCE, OKAY
I-- I AM A 49.6 IN JAMAICA, OKAY [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE
I CAN'T WALK AROUND. AND IT'S NOT SAFE FOR ME TO WALK AROUND IN JAMAICA, OKAY
AND HERE'S THE THING, I WAS WORKING ON A COMEDY CRUISE, AND, LIKE, WE HAD A PORT STOP
IN JAMAICA I WENT FOR A WALK, RIGHT SHOULDN'T DO THAT BY YOURSELF.
AND THIS MAN, MY AGE, CHASING ME ON A BIKE [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ]
A BIKE [ LAUGHTER ] AND HE'S LIKE, "BABY GIRL,
WHERE YOU GOING? LET ME SHOW YOU THE ISLAND." [ LAUGHTER ]
I WAS LIKE, "HOW, ON YOUR HANDLEBARS, SIR? HOW YOU GOING TO SHOW ME
ANYTHING?" AND ANOTHER MAN RUNNING AFTER ME, HE'S LIKE, "SO WHERE YOU
WORK?" I SAID, "I WORK ON THE BOAT THERE, PART-TIME."
HE'S LIKE, "PART-TIME? YOU GIVE ME YOUR BODY, I'LL WORK ON IT FULL-TIME."
[ CHEERS ] I'M LIKE, "OH, OKAY. ALL RIGHT.
I LIKE IT HERE." [ LAUGHTER ] SPEAKING OF CONFIDENCE, I
OFFICIALLY, PERMANENTLY, MOVED OUT OF MY MOTHER'S HOUSE GIVE IT UP FOR ME, YES
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE YEAH YOU SHOULDN'T CLAP
I'M 51 THAT'S SAD [ LAUGHTER ]
I SHOULDN'T-- [ LAUGHTER ] AND I'M GOING TO MISS MY
MOTHER'S SWEET, SWEET JUDGMENT I'M GOING TO MISS HER JUDGMENT SHE HATES THIS JOB
HER EXACT WORDS WERE, "JACKIE, YOU KNOW I HATE COMEDY." I DON'T KNOW, THAT'S LIKE
SAYING YOU DON'T LIKE JOY. I DON'T GET IT BUT SHE LOVED DISCUSSING WHAT I
DO WITH MY NEIGHBORS WHEN I MOVED BACK HOME, NEIGHBORS ARE NOSY, THEY'RE
LIKE, "SO WHAT DO YOU DO FOR A A LIVING NOW?" MY MOM JUMPED IN, "JACKIE IS A
A JOKE!" [ LAUGHTER ] SHE'S LIKE, "YOU KNOW THE CAR?
THE FUNNY MAN ON THE CAR THE JOKER? THAT'S JACKIE.
I SAID, "MOMMY, THAT'S CORRECT, BUT WHAT I DO-- I'M CALLED A COMEDIAN."
SHE'S LIKE, "DO YOU TELL JOKES FOR MONEY? "WELL, YES."
"DO YOU HAVE A LAW DEGREE? "YES, MA'AM. "THEN YOU'RE A FREAKING JOKE."
[ LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE YEAH, I'M GOING TO MISS THAT I'M GOING TO MISS HER WEATHER
REPORTS EVERY DAY, RIGHT BECAUSE I USED TO LIVE IN CALI-- I DON'T MISS INCLEMENT
WEATHER. SHE'S LIKE, "JACKIE, YOU KNOW IT RAINED ON MONDAY.
JACQUELINE, YOU KNOW IT RAINED ON TUESDAY [ LAUGHTER ]
JACKIE, YOU'RE NOT GONNA BELIEVE THIS, IT RAINED ON WEDNESDAY.
"I GET IT, MOMMA WE SHARE THE SAME TV, I GET IT I CAN SEE WHAT YOU SEE."
[ LAUGHTER ] I'M GOING TO MISS HER VERY HEAVY JAMAICAN ACCENT, RIGHT
SHE LOVES REALITY TV SHE'LL CALL ME TO DISCUSS, I DON'T KNOW WHAT SHOW SHE'S
TALKING ABOUT. SHE'S LIKE, "JACKIE, I LOVE THAT SHOW ORIDAS
THE SHOW ON TV AND THE SHOW IS CALLED ORIDAS. AND THE LADY ON THE SHOW HAS
85 PUSSIES." [ LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE I WAS LIKE, "WHAT SHOW ARE YOU
WATCHING, MOMMY? [ LAUGHTER ] AND I WAS LIKE, "WAIT A MINUTE,
YOU MEAN 'HOARDERS'? [ LAUGHTER ] THE LADY WITH 85 CATS.
YOUR ACCENT IS JACKED UP, I'M SORRY. [ LAUGHTER ]
AND FYI, THEY DON'T CALL THEM THAT WORD ANYWHERE THEY'RE CALLED CATS IN EVERY
COUNTRY, I'VE CHECKED. [ LAUGHTER ] ANOTHER BIG MILESTONE SINCE I
WAS HERE LAST. I GOT MARRIED! YEAH
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE YES! AND I'M OBNOXIOUS, YOU KNOW,
SIX MONTHS MARRIED, I'M AN EXPERT, RIGHT? SO, ON INSTAGRAM, PICTURES OF
HE AND I, AND I'M GETTING DM'ED FROM WOMEN, NOW, WHO WANT ADVICE
THEY'RE LIKE, "JACK, I COULD'VE MARRIED AN EX-ATHLETE, EX-JOCK YOU KNOW, A HOT GUY WITH
MUSCLES. HOW'D YOU FIND LOVE AT YOUR AGE?
JUST HOW'D YOU FIND HIM? "I'M REAL. YOU'VE GOT TO FIND MEN WHEN
THEY'RE AT THE END, OKAY [ LAUGHTER ] THE MORE THESE GUY'S BODIES
FALL APART, THE MORE THEY WANT TO COMMIT TO YOU, ALL RIGHT? [ LAUGHTER ]
WHEN MY HUSBAND'S LEFT KNEE BLEW OUT, HE WAS LIKE, "JACKIE, I HAVE ALWAYS LOVED YOU.
[ LAUGHTER ] WHEN THE RIGHT KNEE DIED, "WE SHOULD GET MARRIED."
I'M NOT A FOOL MEN GET LONELY TOO YOU DON'T WANT TO DIE ALONE, I
GET IT, YOU KNOW [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] BUT THE ONE THING WE DON'T HAVE
IN COMMON IS THAT, YOU KNOW, THE ATHLETE WHO CAN COOK, WE STARTED DATING AND IN THE
BEGINNING OF IT, AT 12:30 MIDNIGHT, HE WAS LIKE, "SO DO YOU WANT A MEATBALL
SANDWICH." I'M LIKE, "IT IS 12:00 AT NIGHT.
AND HE'S LIKE-- AND I'M LIKE-- "OF COURSE I DO. [ LAUGHTER ]
THAT'S PART OF THE PROBLEM." BUT I'M FEELING GUILTY WHEN YOU HAVE A HOT GUY, LIVES
IN THE GYM, GOOD SHAPE, YOU KNOW, I'M NOT GOING TO LIE, ALL THIS NEWLYWED NEW STUFF, YOU
KNOW WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT, RIGHT? I FEEL LIKE-- I FEEL LIKE IT'S
KILLING ME I FEEL LIKE I'M DYING, LIKE I HAVE A HERNIA OR A SLIPPED
DISC [ LAUGHTER ] I KNOW, WHEN YOU GO FROM
NOTHING TO ALL OF THIS, IT'S A A LOT, RIGHT AND I'M WORRIED, I DON'T WANT
HIM TO HAVE A HEART ATTACK YOU CAN'T HAVE THE PERSON IN GOOD SHAPE DOING ALL THE WORK,
ALL THE TIME HE'S ALWAYS TAKING THE LEAD IN THE BEDROOM.
I'M LIKE, "YOU KNOW WHAT I GOTTA TAKE THE LEAD AND GIVE TO HIM WHAT HE GIVES ME.
SO, I DECIDED TO SHOW HIM THAT I CAN LOVE HIM THE WAY HE LOVES ME
SO, I DID. TWO WEEKS AGO, I GAVE HIM A GREAT TIME
I HAVE BEEN IN PAIN FOR TWO WEEKS. [ LAUGHTER ]
I HAVE BEEN TALKING AND MAKING JOKES ABOUT MEN'S STAMINA FOR YEARS.
I APOLOGIZE, OKAY? [ LAUGHTER ] I TRIED TO DO WHAT YOU GUYS
DID, I COULDN'T GET THROUGH. I NEEDED A FIVE-MINUTE BREAK, A GRANOLA BAR, A RED BULL.
IN THE MIDDLE OF IT, I'M LOOKING FOR EXCUSES TO GET A A BREAK.
I'M LIKE, "YOU DON'T HEAR THAT NOISE DOWNSTAIRS YOU DON'T WANT TO GO CHECK?"
[ LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE I'M LIKE, "YOU'RE NOT HOT? YOU DON'T FEEL WARM?
IT'S STUFFY IN HERE. I SMELL SMOKE. I DON'T FEEL SAFE.
[ LAUGHTER ] THERE'S A FIRE SOMEWHERE." I'M JACKIE FABULOUS.
THANK YOU SO MUCH, GUYS! [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ♪
Jimmy: ARE YOU KIDDING ME, NOW? ARE YOU KIDDING ME
JACKIE FABULOUS! [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE YOU WERE AWESOME
SEE JACKIE THIS SATURDAY NIGHT AT THE HISTORIC EVERETT THEATRE IN EVERETT, WASHINGTON
WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK, EVERYBODY COME ON BACK YOU CRUSHED IT
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ♪ Jimmy: MY THANKS TO
JUDE LAW, JOSHUA JACKSON, JACKIE FABULOUS, ONCE AGAIN! [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE
AND THE ROOTS, RIGHT THERE, FROM PHILADELPHIA, PENNSYLVANIA
THANK YOU FOR WATCHING STAY TUNED FOR "LATE NIGHT WITH SETH MEYERS.
GOODNIGHT, EVERYBODY THANK YOU! [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE