1 00:00:10,043 --> 00:00:11,478 >> Steve: FROM STUDIO 6B IN ROCKEFELLER CENTER IN THE HEART 2 00:00:11,478 --> 00:00:17,117 OF NEW YORK CITY, IT'S "THE TONIGHT SHOW STARRING JIMMY FALLON." 3 00:00:17,117 --> 00:00:23,523 TONIGHT, JOIN JIMMY AND HIS GUESTS - SAM ROCKWELL 4 00:00:23,523 --> 00:00:27,727 PAMELA ADLON MUSICAL GUEST GANG OF YOUTHS AND FEATURING THE LEGENDARY 5 00:00:27,727 --> 00:00:31,664 ROOTS CREW >> Questlove: 1634 >> Steve: AND NOW, HERE HE IS, 6 00:00:31,664 --> 00:00:32,866 >> Steve: AND NOW, HERE HE IS, JIMMY FALLON 7 00:00:38,438 --> 00:00:51,484 * 8 00:00:51,484 --> 00:01:03,229 * [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE >> Jimmy: OH, WOW! 9 00:01:03,229 --> 00:01:07,267 I MISSED YOU HI, WELCOME! WELCOME, WELCOME, WELCOME, 10 00:01:07,267 --> 00:01:09,836 WELCOME, WELCOME PLEASE, ENJOY YOURSELVES WELCOME, WELCOME, WELCOME TO 11 00:01:09,836 --> 00:01:17,677 "THE TONIGHT SHOW," EVERYBODY. THANK YOU FOR BEING HERE THANK YOU FOR WATCHING 12 00:01:17,677 --> 00:01:25,352 [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE WELL, GUYS THIS WEEKEND WAS EASTER, PASSOVER, AND RAMADAN. 13 00:01:25,352 --> 00:01:27,554 IT'S WHAT'S KNOWN IN THE RELIGIOUS COMMUNITY AS A HOLY TURDUCKEN. 14 00:01:27,554 --> 00:01:30,090 [ LAUGHTER ] I DO LOVE EASTER SUNDAY THOUGH IT'S THE DAY PARENTS GIVE THEIR 15 00:01:30,090 --> 00:01:31,658 KIDS A BASKET OF CANDY THEN TELL THEM TO SIT QUIETLY AT CHURCH 16 00:01:31,658 --> 00:01:37,130 [ LAUGHTER ] SPEAKING OF EASTER, TODAY THE BIDENS HOSTED THE FIRST WHITE 17 00:01:37,130 --> 00:01:38,998 HOUSE EASTER EGG ROLL SINCE THE PANDEMIC BEGAN, AND IT WAS A A HUGE EVENT WITH 30,000 PEOPLE 18 00:01:38,998 --> 00:01:42,002 IN ATTENDANCE. YEP, AFTER TWO MINUTES OF ROLLING EGGS ACROSS THE LAWN, 19 00:01:42,002 --> 00:01:53,179 THE KIDS WERE LIKE, "WOW, I ACTUALLY MISS ZOOM." [ LAUGHTER ] 20 00:01:53,179 --> 00:01:56,816 MEANWHILE, I WAS THRILLED TO BE INVITED AND ATTEND THIS YEAR'S EASTER EGG ROLL. 21 00:01:56,816 --> 00:01:59,652 I DID. I WAS THERE. [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE 22 00:01:59,652 --> 00:02:03,556 TODAY. THIS MORNING I TOLD PRESIDENT BIDEN IT WAS 23 00:02:03,556 --> 00:02:05,825 AN HONOR AND A PRIVILEGE TO BE THERE. AND HE SAID, "JIMMY, WE INVITED 24 00:02:05,825 --> 00:02:09,529 30,000 PEOPLE. [ LAUGHTER ] BUT I DID ACTUALLY GET TO GO TO 25 00:02:09,529 --> 00:02:12,499 THE WHITE HOUSE TODAY. YEAH [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE 26 00:02:12,499 --> 00:02:14,300 WHEN THEY SAID, "THE PRESIDENT WANTS TO SEE YOU," I THOUGHT, "DAMN, HOW BAD DID I SCREW UP 27 00:02:14,300 --> 00:02:22,709 MY TAXES?" [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] BUT I HAD AN ABSOLUTE BLAST. 28 00:02:22,709 --> 00:02:26,880 PLUS, GOOD NEWS. DURING THE EGG HUNT, I FOUND TRUMP'S MISSING CALL LOGS FROM 29 00:02:26,880 --> 00:02:32,519 JANUARY 6th. [ LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE FOUND THEM 30 00:02:32,519 --> 00:02:38,224 I REALLY DID HAVE THE BEST TIME DO WE HAVE A PHOTO OF ME WITH 31 00:02:38,224 --> 00:02:41,461 THE PRESIDENT? [ LAUGHTER ] YEAH, UNBELIEVABLE 32 00:02:41,461 --> 00:02:44,564 IT WAS GREAT ACTUALLY, I READ MY BOOK, "NANA LOVES YOU MORE" TO ALL THE 33 00:02:44,564 --> 00:02:51,371 KIDS YEAH, AND -- [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE 34 00:02:51,371 --> 00:02:53,740 WITH THE PRESIDENT AND FIRST LADY RIGHT NEXT TO ME. THIS IS A REAL PHOTO 35 00:02:53,740 --> 00:02:56,242 THIS IS FROM THIS MORNING. THAT'S A REAL PHOTO. YEAH 36 00:02:56,242 --> 00:02:58,211 [ AUDIENCE AWS ] YEAH, WHILE I WAS READING TO THE KIDS, THE FIRST LADY WAS SO 37 00:02:58,211 --> 00:02:59,746 SWEET. SHE WAS LIKE, "SOUND IT OUT, JIMMY. 38 00:02:59,746 --> 00:03:03,383 YOU CAN DO IT. [ LAUGHTER ] MEANWHILE, I SAW THAT FOR 39 00:03:03,383 --> 00:03:04,784 EASTER, A PHOTO OF SOME KNOCKOFF DOLLAR STORE PEEPS WENT VIRAL 40 00:03:04,784 --> 00:03:09,589 SO, DOLLAR STORE PEEPS TAKE A LOOK AT THESE THINGS, THIS PHOTO 41 00:03:09,589 --> 00:03:16,296 WOW. [ LAUGHTER ] >> Steve: OH 42 00:03:16,296 --> 00:03:22,602 >> Jimmy: IT LOOKS LIKE PEEPS THAT APPEARED IN AN EPISODE OF "BOTCHED." 43 00:03:22,602 --> 00:03:25,538 [ LAUGHTER ] LOOKS LIKE THE REAL HOUSEWIVES OF MARSHMALLOWY HILLS. 44 00:03:25,538 --> 00:03:27,640 [ LAUGHTER ] LET'S SWITCH GEARS AS YOU HOPEFULLY ALREADY KNOW, 45 00:03:27,640 --> 00:03:30,710 TODAY IS TAX DAY THAT'S RIGHT IT'S TAX DAY 46 00:03:30,710 --> 00:03:36,282 DID YOU KNOW THAT? [ SCATTERED REACTION ] ALL RIGHT, KIND OF A 47 00:03:36,282 --> 00:03:39,085 A NON-REACTION THOUGH. YEAH, OKAY YEAH, IT IS TAX DAY, IT'S 48 00:03:39,085 --> 00:03:40,787 A PANDEMIC, IT'S SPRING. SO, YOU CAN GET TAXED, VAXED, AND WAXED. 49 00:03:40,787 --> 00:03:44,124 [ LAUGHTER ] YOU CAN TELL IT'S TAX DAY 'CAUSE RIGHT NOW EVERY 50 00:03:44,124 --> 00:03:52,532 BILLIONAIRE IS LAYING LOW IN SPACE. [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] 51 00:03:52,532 --> 00:03:54,367 WELL, AHEAD OF TODAY'S TAX DEADLINE, THE WHITE HOUSE RELEASED THE BIDENS' TAX 52 00:03:54,367 --> 00:03:55,969 RETURN, AND TOGETHER THEY EARNED OVER $600,000 MAKING JOE BIDEN THE JEFF BEZOS 53 00:03:55,969 --> 00:04:03,143 OF WILMINGTON, DELAWARE. [ LAUGHTER ] YEP, THE PRESIDENT MADE MONEY 54 00:04:03,143 --> 00:04:08,314 FROM HIS SALARY, HIS BOOK SALES, AND HIS UPCOMING CAMEO IN "MAGIC MIKE 3." 55 00:04:08,314 --> 00:04:13,486 [ LAUGHTER ] WELL, ACCORDING TO THEIR TAX RETURN, THE BIDENS DID NOT 56 00:04:13,486 --> 00:04:19,959 RECEIVE A REFUND THIS YEAR WHEN HE SAW, EVEN BIDEN WAS LIKE, "FRIGGIN' BIDEN. 57 00:04:19,959 --> 00:04:28,635 [ LAUGHTER ] [ APPLAUSE ] UNBELIEVABLE 58 00:04:28,635 --> 00:04:30,303 THIS IS COOL, THE FDA JUST AUTHORIZED THE FIRST EVER COVID BREATH TEST. 59 00:04:30,303 --> 00:04:34,074 AND IT'S MORE THAN 90% EFFECTIVE. CHECK OUT WHAT THIS 60 00:04:34,074 --> 00:04:38,445 BREATHALYZER LOOKS LIKE. THIS IS REAL [ LAUGHTER ] 61 00:04:38,445 --> 00:04:43,450 IT'S AMAZING THE GUY COMBINED LUGGAGE WITH A CAPRI SUN. 62 00:04:43,450 --> 00:04:47,620 AH, IT'S AMAZING NOW THERE'S NASAL SWABS AND BREATHALYZERS. 63 00:04:47,620 --> 00:04:49,556 WHICH MEANS PRETTY SOON YOU'LL SEE TWO LINES AT CVS, ONE THAT SAYS, "UP YOURS," THE OTHER ONE 64 00:04:49,556 --> 00:04:52,225 SAYS, "BLOW ME." >> Steve: OH WHOA 65 00:04:52,225 --> 00:04:56,096 [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE * WHOA 66 00:04:56,096 --> 00:05:04,037 WHOA >> Jimmy: WELL, HERE IN NEW YORK, TODAY FORMER MAYOR 67 00:05:04,037 --> 00:05:05,839 MICHAEL BLOOMBERG SPOKE AT CITY HALL, AND PEOPLE WERE SAYING THAT HIS MASK SEEMED TOO TIGHT 68 00:05:05,839 --> 00:05:10,844 FOR HIS FACE LOOK AT THIS 69 00:05:12,779 --> 00:05:14,781 >> BUT SERIOUSLY, I WAS GLAD TO HAVE THE CHANCE TO WELCOME BACK EACH OF MY PREDECESSORS TO CITY 70 00:05:14,781 --> 00:05:23,456 HALL, AND I'M GLAD THAT YOU'RE CARRYING ON THAT TRADITION [ LAUGHTER ] 71 00:05:23,456 --> 00:05:25,258 >> Jimmy: HE SPOKE FOR ABOUT TEN MORE SECONDS, THEN PASSED OUT. 72 00:05:25,258 --> 00:05:31,064 CAN WE SEE THAT AGAIN? YEAH IT'S LIKE IN HIS MOUTH 73 00:05:31,064 --> 00:05:40,206 WHO MAKES HIS MASK LULULEMON MAKES HIS MASK [ LAUGHTER ] 74 00:05:40,206 --> 00:05:42,175 >> Steve: OH, BOY. >> Jimmy: YOU KNOW THAT UNDER THAT MASK, HE LOOKED LIKE 75 00:05:42,175 --> 00:05:47,514 A DOLLAR STORE PEEP. [ LAUGHTER ] [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE 76 00:05:47,514 --> 00:05:51,551 WELL, GUYS, RIGHT NOW IT IS TIME FOR OUR LATEST INSTALLMENT OF "TONIGHT SHOW POLLS." 77 00:05:51,551 --> 00:05:54,754 OF "TONIGHT SHOW POLLS." HERE, CHECK THESE OUT. 78 00:05:57,090 --> 00:05:58,692 * TONIGHT SHO 79 00:05:58,692 --> 00:06:02,629 POLLS * [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE >> Jimmy: THIS FIRST POLL 80 00:06:02,629 --> 00:06:06,533 ASKED, "WHAT'S THE HARDEST PART OF SPRING CLEANING?" 70% SAID "DECIDING WHAT TO 81 00:06:06,533 --> 00:06:10,603 THROW OUT. 20% SAID "DECIDING WHAT TO DONATE." 82 00:06:10,603 --> 00:06:18,278 10% SAID "DECIDING WHICH OF MY KIDS' TOYS I CAN CHUCK WITHOUT THEM NOTICING. 83 00:06:18,278 --> 00:06:22,949 [ LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE THIS NEXT POLL ASKED, "DO YOU UNDERSTAND WHAT'S HAPPENING ON 84 00:06:22,949 --> 00:06:26,519 'MOON KNIGHT?' 10% SAID, "YES." 90% SAID, "AS LONG AS THERE ARE 85 00:06:26,519 --> 00:06:30,924 NO FOLLOW-UP QUESTIONS, YES. [ LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE NEXT POLL ASKED, "DO YOU THINK 86 00:06:30,924 --> 00:06:34,661 TWITTER SHOULD ADD AN EDIT BUTTON?" 30% SAID "NO." 87 00:06:34,661 --> 00:06:42,469 20% SAID "YESH." [ LAUGHTER ] 10% SAID, "I MEAN, YERS. 88 00:06:42,469 --> 00:06:48,108 10% SAID "YEES." 10% SAID "YESH." 10% SAID "YESHTERDAY." 89 00:06:48,108 --> 00:06:57,317 AND 10% SAID "STUPID DUCKING THING! [ LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE 90 00:06:57,317 --> 00:06:58,885 AND FINALLY THIS LAST ONE ASKED, "DID YOU QUIT YOUR DAY JOB DURING THE GREAT 91 00:06:58,885 --> 00:07:01,354 RESIGNATION? 50% SAID, "YES, ABSOLUTELY." 49% SAID, "NO, BUT I WANTED 92 00:07:01,354 --> 00:07:05,558 TO." TOM BRADY SAID, "IT'S COMPLICATED. 93 00:07:05,558 --> 00:07:09,929 [ LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE ANYWAY, THAT'S ALL THE TIME WE HAVE FOR "TONIGHT SHOW POLLS." 94 00:07:09,929 --> 00:07:13,566 WE HAVE A GREAT SHOW TONIGHT SAM ROCKWELL IS HERE TONIGHT [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE 95 00:07:13,566 --> 00:07:18,905 WE LOVE SAM ROCKWELL PAMELA ADLON IS HERE TONIGHT [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE 96 00:07:18,905 --> 00:07:21,508 AND WE'VE GOT MUSIC FROM GANG OF YOUTHS. STICK AROUND 97 00:07:21,508 --> 00:07:23,910 WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN. COME ON BACK 98 00:07:23,910 --> 00:07:31,885 [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE * >> Jimmy: YOU'RE IN THE, UH, 99 00:07:31,885 --> 00:07:34,120 THE CIRCLE IN THE SQUARE >> YEAH. >> Jimmy: I MEAN, WHICH IS -- 100 00:07:34,120 --> 00:07:35,588 THE THEATER -- THE AUDIENCE IS AROUND YOU >> YEAH, IT'S SO EASY TO FALL 101 00:07:35,588 --> 00:07:39,292 OFF THE TRAIN TRACKS AS YOU KNOW, WITH "SNL" AND STUFF, LIKE, YOU - 102 00:07:39,292 --> 00:07:42,062 >> Jimmy: YOU GOTTA BE FOCUSED >> YOU GOTTA BE FOCUSED LIVE >> Jimmy: YEAH, NO, I NEVER 103 00:07:42,062 --> 00:07:43,163 >> YOU GOTTA BE FOCUSED LIVE >> Jimmy: YEAH, NO, I NEVER BROKE CHARACTER. 104 00:07:59,646 --> 00:08:02,182 WHAT A SHOW WE HAVE FOR YOU TONIGHT. HE STARS IN THE BROADWAY PLAY 105 00:08:02,182 --> 00:08:08,488 "AMERICAN BUFFALO. THERE HE IS, RIGHT THERE HE ALSO VOICES A CHARACTER IN 106 00:08:08,488 --> 00:08:12,025 THE NEW ANIMATED MOVIE, "THE BAD GUYS," WHICH HITS THEATERS THIS FRIDAY. 107 00:08:12,025 --> 00:08:17,564 SAM ROCKWELL IS HERE, TONIGHT. [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE >> Steve: FIRECRACKER. 108 00:08:17,564 --> 00:08:22,736 >> Jimmy: THAT'S PURE TALENT VERY TALENTED SHOW HER SHOW, "BETTER THINGS" WILL 109 00:08:22,736 --> 00:08:29,309 AIR ITS SERIES FINALE NEXT MONDAY ON FX AND HULU. PAMELA ADLON IS HERE 110 00:08:29,309 --> 00:08:32,278 >> Steve: YEAH [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE >> Jimmy: LOVE THAT SHOW 111 00:08:32,278 --> 00:08:34,481 BRILLIANT. WE'VE GOT GREAT MUSIC FROM GANG OF YOUTHS 112 00:08:34,481 --> 00:08:39,419 [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE THERE YOU GO WHAT AN EXCITING DAY I HAD 113 00:08:39,419 --> 00:08:44,824 IT'S SUCH AN AMAZING MONDAY. I WENT -- I WAS AT THE WHITE HOUSE THIS MORNING 114 00:08:44,824 --> 00:08:48,495 HOURS AGO I WAS AT THE WHITE HOUSE. I WENT -- THEY INVITED ME TO GO 115 00:08:48,495 --> 00:08:50,864 TO THE EASTER EGG ROLL AND I GO, "I WOULD LOVE TO GO. THEY GO, "WE KNOW YOU'VE GOT 116 00:08:50,864 --> 00:08:52,832 THE 'NANA LOVES YOU MORE' BOOK," AND THAT'S WHAT DR. JILL BIDEN -- HER GRANDKIDS 117 00:08:52,832 --> 00:09:03,810 CALL HER NANA. >> Steve: AW >> Jimmy: I GO, "THIS IS 118 00:09:03,810 --> 00:09:08,882 PERFECT. I GO, "GREAT, WILL I MEET THE FIRST LADY?" 119 00:09:08,882 --> 00:09:14,020 THEY GO, "NOT NECESSARILY, NO. [ LAUGHTER ] I GO, "OKAY, I'M STILL HONORED 120 00:09:14,020 --> 00:09:16,790 THAT WOULD BE AMAZING. I'D LOVE TO GO." THE GIRLS -- I BROUGHT MY KIDS 121 00:09:16,790 --> 00:09:18,858 AND -- AND SO THEY GO, "YEAH, IT'S JUST A THING, YOU'LL GO WE DON'T KNOW IF YOU'LL SEE 122 00:09:18,858 --> 00:09:21,795 ANYONE IT'S REALLY THE FIRST LADY'S EVENT. 123 00:09:21,795 --> 00:09:23,763 SO, BUT YOU MIGHT SEE HER, BUT SHE HAS THINGS TO DO." I GO, "TRUST ME, I TOTALLY 124 00:09:23,763 --> 00:09:28,034 UNDERSTAND." WENT, HAD THE BEST TIME. GOT TO MEET EVERYONE 125 00:09:28,034 --> 00:09:33,273 >> Steve: OH >> Jimmy: GOT TO MEET PRESIDENT BIDEN. 126 00:09:33,273 --> 00:09:36,910 I GOT TO MEET THE FIRST LADY I SAW ASHLEY BIDEN IT WAS JUST -- WE WENT THERE 127 00:09:36,910 --> 00:09:38,745 AND THE LAST TIME I WAS AT THE WHITE HOUSE, I THINK WAS -- I DID THE FOURTH OF JULY -- I DID 128 00:09:38,745 --> 00:09:40,413 SOME STAND-UP FOR VETERANS AND THAT'S WHERE I WORE LIKE A -- I THINK I WORE LIKE AN 129 00:09:40,413 --> 00:09:48,221 EIGHT-PIECE SUIT [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] BECAUSE I WAS SO EXCITED TO 130 00:09:48,221 --> 00:09:49,923 MEET THE PRESIDENT AND THE FIRST LADY, I WAS JUST -- WANTED TO WEAR THE BEST SUIT I 131 00:09:49,923 --> 00:09:53,426 COULD WEAR IT WAS 100 DEGREES, AND I WAS SWEATING 132 00:09:53,426 --> 00:09:57,330 [ LAUGHTER ] I LOOKED TERRIBLE. I LOOKED LIKE I WAS HAVING A 133 00:09:57,330 --> 00:10:03,036 A STROKE FOR THE WHOLE DAY [ LAUGHTER ] AND I GOT TO MEET THEM 134 00:10:03,036 --> 00:10:05,171 AND FINALLY THE SWEAT WAS IN MY COLLAR AND MICHELLE OBAMA WAS LIKE, "ARE YOU ALL RIGHT?" 135 00:10:05,171 --> 00:10:08,208 [ LAUGHTER ] PRESIDENT OBAMA WAS LIKE, "DIDN'T YOU GET THE MEMO 136 00:10:08,208 --> 00:10:10,343 THIS IS A BARBECUE." [ LAUGHTER ] AND I GO, "YEAH. 137 00:10:10,343 --> 00:10:13,380 I GO, "THIS TIME, I'LL BE PREPARED." I WORE A NICE KIND OF 138 00:10:13,380 --> 00:10:17,617 LIGHTWEIGHT SUIT >> Steve: RIGHT. >> Jimmy: OF COURSE IT WAS 139 00:10:17,617 --> 00:10:25,892 40 DEGREES IN D.C. THIS MORNING. [ LAUGHTER ] 140 00:10:25,892 --> 00:10:27,827 BUT I WENT WE WENT YESTERDAY, EASTER SUNDAY 141 00:10:27,827 --> 00:10:29,929 I WENT WITH -- AND WE DIDN'T HAVE MUCH TIME I WANTED TO GO SIGHTSEEING WITH 142 00:10:29,929 --> 00:10:32,098 NANCY AND THE GIRLS. SO, WE JUST JUMPED -- WE GOT A A CAR AND WE JUST JUMPED OUT, 143 00:10:32,098 --> 00:10:33,867 DIFFERENT SPOTS, TOOK A PHOTO, OR HAD SOMEONE TAKE THE PHOTO, AND THEN RAN BACK IN THE CAR 144 00:10:33,867 --> 00:10:38,238 [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] THIS IS US AT THE CAPITOL. NO ONE LOOKING AT THE CAMERA AT 145 00:10:38,238 --> 00:10:41,675 ALL. [ LAUGHTER ] MY EYES ARE CLOSED 146 00:10:41,675 --> 00:10:44,310 THIS IS US -- IT'S THE WASHINGTON MONUMENT, RIGHT HERE 147 00:10:44,310 --> 00:10:49,783 AND THE MALL NO ONE LOOKING >> Steve: OH 148 00:10:49,783 --> 00:10:51,918 [ LAUGHTER ] >> Jimmy: NO ONE'S LOOKING AT THE CAMERA THERE 149 00:10:51,918 --> 00:10:53,853 >> Steve: NO >> Jimmy: THEN I GOT THE HANG OF IT. 150 00:10:53,853 --> 00:10:57,090 THIS ONE WAS GOOD. THIS ONE'S THE LINCOLN -- LINCOLN MEMORIAL 151 00:10:57,090 --> 00:11:00,460 >> Steve: THERE YOU GO [ AUDIENCE AWS ] >> Jimmy: YEAH, THAT'S EVERYONE 152 00:11:00,460 --> 00:11:03,930 THERE. BUT YOU -- WHAT YOU REALIZE WHILE YOU'RE DOING THIS, 153 00:11:03,930 --> 00:11:06,599 THERE'S HUNDREDS OF PEOPLE LOOKING AT THE LINCOLN MEMORIAL 154 00:11:06,599 --> 00:11:13,840 >> Steve: YEAH >> Jimmy: BUT NOW THEY'RE STARING AT YOU POSING. 155 00:11:13,840 --> 00:11:16,810 [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] >> Steve: YEAH >> Jimmy: I GO, "WHATEVER. 156 00:11:16,810 --> 00:11:18,912 >> Steve: YEAH, WHATEVER >> Jimmy: I DON'T WANT TO TAKE ANYTHING AWAY FROM LINCOLN 157 00:11:18,912 --> 00:11:21,948 [ LAUGHTER ] BUT IT WAS -- IT WAS -- IT WAS AMAZING. 158 00:11:21,948 --> 00:11:24,084 THEN I JUST GOT THE HANG OF IT THIS IS JUST A NICE -- A NICE THING OF US THERE. 159 00:11:24,084 --> 00:11:25,752 >> Steve: AW [ AUDIENCE AWS ] >> Jimmy: YEAH, NICE 160 00:11:25,752 --> 00:11:27,987 AND THEN THIS IS US AT THE -- THE WHITE HOUSE, THIS MORNING. AND WE GET THERE -- IT WAS JUST 161 00:11:27,987 --> 00:11:29,956 AMAZING. YOU GET TO -- YOU GET TO SAY HI, YOU KNOW, AND I GO, "OH, MY 162 00:11:29,956 --> 00:11:31,891 GOSH." JUST -- PRESIDENT BIDEN JUST KNEELED DOWN AND JUST TALKED TO 163 00:11:31,891 --> 00:11:33,493 MY GIRLS LIKE, "I DON'T KNOW THE MAN YOU'RE WITH, BUT WHAT ARE YOU GUYS UP TO?" 164 00:11:33,493 --> 00:11:35,261 [ LAUGHTER ] ALL RIGHT. YOU KNOW 165 00:11:35,261 --> 00:11:39,833 HE WAS FUNNY AND THE FIRST LADY WAS AMAZING I'VE NEVER MET THE FIRST LADY. 166 00:11:39,833 --> 00:11:45,905 JUST CHARMING AND JUST LOOKED GREAT. AND YOU JUST FEEL -- IT'S SO -- 167 00:11:45,905 --> 00:11:50,110 IT JUST FEELS -- I DON'T KNOW WHAT IT IS, IN D.C., IN GENERAL. 168 00:11:50,110 --> 00:11:53,313 IF YOU EVER GET A CHANCE, GO TO D.C. JUST GO TO WASHINGTON, D.C 169 00:11:53,313 --> 00:11:57,350 EVERYTHING'S FREE. [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] THERE'S MUSEUMS EVERYWHERE 170 00:11:57,350 --> 00:11:58,918 IT'S JUST -- NATURAL HISTORY MUSEUM, YOU'VE GOT THE SMITHSONIAN. 171 00:11:58,918 --> 00:12:03,790 >> Steve: AIR AND SPACE MUSEUM >> Jimmy: AIR AND SPACE. WORLD WAR II MEMOR - 172 00:12:03,790 --> 00:12:06,860 >> Steve: YEAH >> Jimmy: YOU GET TO SEE MEMORIALS. 173 00:12:06,860 --> 00:12:08,294 IT'S JUST, HONESTLY -- AND YOU JUST GO, "GOD, I LOVE THIS COUNTRY. 174 00:12:08,294 --> 00:12:10,797 IT'S SO GOOD LIKE WHAT A BEAUTIFUL, AMAZING -- 175 00:12:10,797 --> 00:12:13,833 [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE THE HISTORY OF THIS PLACE IS AMAZING. 176 00:12:13,833 --> 00:12:16,536 I LOVED IT I HAD THE BEST TIME. AND I GO TO READ THE BOOK, I 177 00:12:16,536 --> 00:12:20,140 GO, "GREAT," AND THE FIRST LADY GOES OUT SHE GOES, "I'M GOING TO GO 178 00:12:20,140 --> 00:12:21,975 OUT --" SOMEBODY SAID, THE FIRST LADY IS GOING TO GO OUT AND READ "BROWN BEAR, BROWN 179 00:12:21,975 --> 00:12:31,384 BEAR." I GO, "AWESOME I'D LOVE TO EVEN SEE THAT. 180 00:12:31,384 --> 00:12:33,319 SO SHE DID IT IN FRONT OF THE KIDS AND THE KIDS ARE ALL LAUGHING. 181 00:12:33,319 --> 00:12:35,088 IT WAS LIKE AMAZING, LIKE, EDUCATIONAL-THEMED, BUT FUN FAMILY THING FOR THE -- FOR, 182 00:12:35,088 --> 00:12:41,161 LIKE, THE KIDS AND THEN, SHE WAS SUPPOSED TO LEAVE. 183 00:12:41,161 --> 00:12:42,862 AND THEN THE PRESIDENT COMES AND SITS NEXT TO HER SO, THEN THEY'RE BOTH SITTING 184 00:12:42,862 --> 00:12:45,331 THERE, AND THEN I THOUGHT THEY WERE BOTH GOING TO LEAVE AND THEN THEY GO, "WE'LL STAY 185 00:12:45,331 --> 00:12:48,568 FOR JIMMY. AND SO THEY JUST STAYED, AND WE READ "NANA" TO ALL THESE KIDS 186 00:12:48,568 --> 00:12:51,504 WITH THE PRESIDENT [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] HE WAS LIKE -- AND THE FIRST 187 00:12:51,504 --> 00:12:53,106 LADY WAS LIKE -- BECAUSE, YOU KNOW, IT'S ME. SO I'M JUST LIKE -- I'M -- I 188 00:12:53,106 --> 00:12:55,675 DON'T EVEN CONSIDER MYSELF, REALLY, AN AUTHOR. BUT I'M READING THIS BOOK. 189 00:12:55,675 --> 00:13:02,682 AND SHE'S GOING, "I LOVE THIS BOOK." AND I WAS LIKE, "PUT HER MIC 190 00:13:02,682 --> 00:13:05,618 UP [ LAUGHTER ] THIS IS FANTASTIC -- THIS IS A 191 00:13:05,618 --> 00:13:07,454 A GREAT ENDORSEMENT FOR MY BOOK THEY COULD NOT HAVE BEEN NICER 192 00:13:07,454 --> 00:13:13,593 HUMANS AND EVERYONE WAS GREAT WHAT A GREAT VIBE FROM THERE 193 00:13:13,593 --> 00:13:16,262 I JUST WANT TO THANK THE WHITE HOUSE SO MUCH FOR INVITING ME. [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE 194 00:13:16,262 --> 00:13:20,867 GO CHECK OUT D.C. IF YOU WANT TO GO ON VACATION. IT'S A BEAUTIFUL PLACE 195 00:13:20,867 --> 00:13:24,804 GUYS, IT'S TIME FOR OUR BIT CALLED "BAD SIGNS. HERE WE GO 196 00:13:24,804 --> 00:13:25,939 HERE WE GO LET'S CHECK IT OUT 197 00:13:26,706 --> 00:13:27,741 * 198 00:13:27,741 --> 00:13:37,250 * BAD SIGNS * [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE >> Steve: TIME FOR THIS BIT. 199 00:13:37,250 --> 00:13:39,386 >> Jimmy: THESE ARE PICTURES -- YEAH, I KNOW, EXACTLY. I JUST SHOWED THEM 200 00:13:39,386 --> 00:13:42,288 >> Steve: YEAH THESE ARE PICTURES OF FUNNY OR WEIRD SIGNS THAT YOU GUYS SAW 201 00:13:42,288 --> 00:13:49,863 IN REAL LIFE AND SENT IN TO US THESE ARE ALL REAL, AND I APPRECIATE YOU GUYS SENDING IN 202 00:13:49,863 --> 00:13:51,097 TO US. THIS FIRST ONE WAS SENT IN BY MICHAEL MORRISSEY IN 203 00:13:51,097 --> 00:13:56,569 FORT WAYNE, INDIANA. IT IS A SIGN HE SPOTTED ON A A GATE OUTSIDE OF A PARK 204 00:13:56,569 --> 00:13:59,472 LOOK AT THIS THING, RIGHT HERE IT SAYS, "THIS GATE MUST BE OPEN OR SHUT AT ALL TIMES. 205 00:13:59,472 --> 00:14:06,613 [ LAUGHTER ] "HEY, YOU HEAR ME? EITHER OPEN IT OR CLOSE IT." 206 00:14:06,613 --> 00:14:10,950 [ SQUEAKING YEAH [ LAUGHTER ] 207 00:14:10,950 --> 00:14:14,187 THIS NEXT ONE WAS SENT IN BY STEPHEN WEST IS SALISBURY, NORTH CAROLINA 208 00:14:14,187 --> 00:14:17,257 >> Steve: OH >> Jimmy: HE'S FROM NORTH CAROLINA 209 00:14:17,257 --> 00:14:21,861 HE WAS - [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] HE WAS SHOPPING, AND HE SAW 210 00:14:21,861 --> 00:14:25,632 THIS, "CLEARANCE $16.77. LOOK AT THE OLD PRICE. $16.78 211 00:14:25,632 --> 00:14:28,068 [ LAUGHTER ] HEY-OH CLEARANCE. 212 00:14:28,068 --> 00:14:29,502 WE'RE GETTING THIS STUFF OUT OF HERE WE'RE WIPING THIS STUFF OUT OF 213 00:14:29,502 --> 00:14:31,371 HERE GET IT OUT THIS NEXT ONE WAS SENT IN BY 214 00:14:31,371 --> 00:14:32,772 CLEO WOODROW IN BIRMINGHAM, ALABAMA. SHE WAS BROWSING HER LOCAL 215 00:14:32,772 --> 00:14:36,076 BOOKSTORE AND SAW THIS SIGN. "DISCOVER A NEW HOBBY. CAN WE JUST ZOOM OUT A LITTLE 216 00:14:36,076 --> 00:14:46,786 BIT? IT'S ALL SERIAL KILLERS. >> Steve: OH 217 00:14:46,786 --> 00:14:48,888 [ LAUGHTER ] WOW. >> Jimmy: THAT'S INTERESTING 218 00:14:48,888 --> 00:14:50,290 THIS NEXT ONE WAS SENT IN BY BONNIE KETTER IN MONTGOMERY, ILLINOIS 219 00:14:50,290 --> 00:14:51,825 >> Steve: OOH. >> Jimmy: THIS IS A SIGN THAT SHE SPOTTED WHILE DRIVING TO 220 00:14:51,825 --> 00:14:53,126 WORK IT SAID, "KEEP LEFT, LEFT LANE CLOSED AHEAD," BY THE WAY. 221 00:14:53,126 --> 00:14:59,632 [ LAUGHTER ] SO JUST GO FIGURE IT OUT JUST OPEN OR CLOSE IT. 222 00:14:59,632 --> 00:15:03,036 JUST OPEN OR CLOSE IT. >> Steve: EITHER WAY >> Jimmy: I DON'T WANT TO KNOW 223 00:15:03,036 --> 00:15:08,241 I DON'T EVEN WANT TO KNOW. JUST OPEN OR CLOSE IT. >> Steve: I'M ON MY WAY TO OPEN 224 00:15:08,241 --> 00:15:11,945 IT >> Jimmy: DON'T TALK I'M VERY BUSY. 225 00:15:11,945 --> 00:15:15,615 >> Steve: I'M CLOSING IT NOW >> Jimmy: WHATEVER YOU DO. I DON'T WANT TO GET INVOLVED 226 00:15:15,615 --> 00:15:18,118 JUST HAVE IT OPEN OR CLOSED. LEFT LANE IS CLOSED, BY THE WAY. 227 00:15:18,118 --> 00:15:21,054 BUT ONLY USE THE LEFT LANE SO THEY USED THE RIGHT ONE BECAUSE THAT WAS THE ONLY ONE 228 00:15:21,054 --> 00:15:26,259 THAT WAS - >> Steve: OPEN >> Jimmy: LEFT 229 00:15:26,259 --> 00:15:28,595 [ LAUGHTER ] >> Steve: NICE NICE, LEFT AS IN REMAINING 230 00:15:28,595 --> 00:15:30,897 [ DING ] HE TOOK THE PLAY ON WORDS. [ APPLAUSE ] 231 00:15:30,897 --> 00:15:36,603 * OH SNAP YOU DID THE PLAY ON WORD OH SNAP * 232 00:15:36,603 --> 00:15:39,406 * OH OH SNA YOU DID THE PLAY ON WORD OH SNAP * 233 00:15:39,406 --> 00:15:44,077 >> Jimmy: YEP. [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] YEP. 234 00:15:44,077 --> 00:15:45,979 THAT WAS IT. >> Steve: YEAH >> Jimmy: THEY WERE SNAPPING 235 00:15:45,979 --> 00:15:47,614 ANOTHER PLAY ON WORDS. THEY ADDED A BONUS YEAH 236 00:15:47,614 --> 00:15:55,755 THEY ADDED -- SLIM JIM WAS THERE TOO. >> Steve: "SLAP OPEN A SLIM 237 00:15:55,755 --> 00:15:57,090 JIM. >> Jimmy: YEAH THIS NEXT ONE WAS SENT IN BY 238 00:15:57,090 --> 00:15:58,825 RACHEL WERNER IN ATLANTA, GEORGIA. SHE'S A TEACHER, AND SHE WAS 239 00:15:58,825 --> 00:16:00,593 GIVEN THIS SIGN BY ONE OF HER STUDENT'S PARENTS THAT SAID, "DEAR TEACHERS, WE APPR-CIATE 240 00:16:00,593 --> 00:16:01,795 YOU. [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] CLOSE ENOUGH 241 00:16:01,795 --> 00:16:07,934 >> Steve: ALL THE TEACHERS WERE FIRED. [ LAUGHTER ] 242 00:16:07,934 --> 00:16:16,743 >> Jimmy: THIS NEXT IS FROM ERIK RISK, RIGHT HERE IN BROOKLYN, NEW YORK 243 00:16:16,743 --> 00:16:18,912 >> Steve: HEY! BROOKLYN, HEY! >> Jimmy: IT WAS A SIGN THAT HE 244 00:16:18,912 --> 00:16:22,749 SPOTTED IN HIS APARTMENT BUILDING'S MAIL ROOM IT SAID, "PLEASE DO NOT LEAVE 245 00:16:22,749 --> 00:16:27,087 PACKAGES HERE. "YEAH, OKAY. >> Steve: "SOUNDS GOOD." 246 00:16:27,087 --> 00:16:33,259 "YEAH, OKAY. "YOU GOT IT, BOSS. >> Jimmy: "YEAH, OKAY. 247 00:16:33,259 --> 00:16:35,862 FINALLY, THIS LAST ONE WAS SENT IN BY WADE ALGER -- ALGER, SORRY. 248 00:16:35,862 --> 00:16:41,101 WAYNE ALGER IN DALLAS, TEXAS HE WAS SHOPPING IN HIS LOCAL PHARMACY AND SPOTTED THIS. 249 00:16:41,101 --> 00:16:45,972 THE MEN'S SHAVE AISLE RIGHT NEXT TO THE NUTS AISLE [ LAUGHTER ] 250 00:16:45,972 --> 00:16:53,646 >> Steve: YOU KNOW - [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE I BET -- 251 00:16:53,646 --> 00:16:57,450 >> Jimmy: WHAT'S THAT? >> Steve: I BET THE GUY WHO DID THAT GOT SACKED. 252 00:16:57,450 --> 00:16:59,652 [ AUDIENCE OHS ] [ RIM SHOT ] >> Jimmy: THAT'S ALL THE TIME 253 00:16:59,652 --> 00:17:01,621 WE HAVE FOR BAD SIGNS. IF YOU SEE A FUNNY SIGN, YOU CAN EMAIL IT TO US AT 254 00:17:01,621 --> 00:17:03,456 BADSIGNS@TONIGHTSHOW.COM AND WE MIGHT PUT IT ON THE SHOW 255 00:17:03,456 --> 00:17:05,158 STICK AROUND WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK WITH SAM ROCKWELL 256 00:17:05,158 --> 00:17:11,865 [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE * >> BECAUSE I REMEMBER, I WAS 257 00:17:11,865 --> 00:17:15,735 HERE, LIKE TWO NIGHTS BEFORE EVERYTHING GOT SHUT DOWN >> Jimmy: I REMEMBER THIS. 258 00:17:15,735 --> 00:17:18,838 >> REMEMBER I HAD THE THIEF SPRAY AND -- >> Jimmy: I DO REMEMBER. 259 00:17:18,838 --> 00:17:20,173 >> I WOULDN'T SHAKE YOUR HAND, BUT I SHOOK RACHEL MADDOW'S HAND 260 00:17:20,173 --> 00:17:23,743 >> Jimmy: YOU BASICALLY -- YOU HUGGED RACHEL -- I SAW YOU. 261 00:17:23,743 --> 00:17:27,514 >> I LICKED HER. >> Jimmy: YOU HUGGED RACHEL MADDOW. 262 00:17:27,514 --> 00:17:42,796 >> I WAS LIKE, "NO, BRO. "RACHEL MADDOW, HI." >> Jimmy: OUR FIRST GUEST IS AN 263 00:17:42,796 --> 00:17:44,264 OSCAR-WINNING ACTOR WHO STARS IN THE BROADWAY PLAY "AMERICAN BUFFALO. 264 00:17:44,264 --> 00:17:48,735 HE'S ALSO THE VOICE OF MR. WOLF IN THE NEW ANIMATED MOVIE "THE BAD GUYS," WHICH HITS THEATERS 265 00:17:48,735 --> 00:17:53,873 THIS FRIDAY. PLEASE WELCOME SAM ROCKWELL. 266 00:17:56,543 --> 00:18:22,302 * * [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE 267 00:18:22,302 --> 00:18:24,137 >> Jimmy: THAT'S SAM ROCKWELL! THAT'S EXACTLY HOW YOU DO IT THAT'S HOW YOU DO IT 268 00:18:24,137 --> 00:18:27,073 SAM ROCKWELL >> HOW YOU DOING, MAN? HEY, MAN 269 00:18:27,073 --> 00:18:29,242 COME ON, MAN >> THAT'S HOW YOU DO IT, BABY. >> Jimmy: THAT'S HOW YOU DO IT, 270 00:18:29,242 --> 00:18:31,644 MAN. >> ON FRIDAY NIGHT >> Jimmy: YEAH, IT'S FRIDAY. 271 00:18:31,644 --> 00:18:33,646 IT IS FRIDAY ON A MONDAY WELCOME BACK TO FRIDAY ON A MONDAY 272 00:18:33,646 --> 00:18:44,958 YOU LOOK GOOD. I LOVE THIS. >> HEY, YOU LIKE THAT? 273 00:18:44,958 --> 00:18:47,093 >> Jimmy: YES, YES >> THIS IS FOR THE PLAY. >> Jimmy: WOW. 274 00:18:47,093 --> 00:18:49,062 >> I'M GOING TO DARKEN IT A LITTLE BIT FOR THE PLAY. >> Jimmy: YOU COLOR THIS 275 00:18:49,062 --> 00:18:51,264 YOU COLOR THIS >> I COLOR IT FOR THE PLAY NOW IT'S KIND OF GINGER. 276 00:18:51,264 --> 00:18:53,099 I'M A LITTLE GINGER THERE. >> Jimmy: YEAH, YEAH, I LIKE IT 277 00:18:53,099 --> 00:18:54,934 >> YOU KNOW, FOR THEATER, YOU WANT IT TO KIND OF POP >> Jimmy: BECAUSE YOU ARE MORE 278 00:18:54,934 --> 00:18:56,703 OF LIKE A BROWN, I WOULD SAY LIKE A BROWN HAIRED MAN. >> YEAH, KIND OF BROWN, LIGHT 279 00:18:56,703 --> 00:18:58,571 BROWN. BUT THEN, THE FACIAL HAIR IS KIND OF -- 280 00:18:58,571 --> 00:19:06,112 >> Jimmy: GINGER >> YEAH. >> Jimmy: YEAH 281 00:19:06,112 --> 00:19:07,914 >> I ALWAYS WANTED TO BE LIKE ITALIAN AS A YOUNG ACTOR, SO I WOULD -- YOU KNOW, 282 00:19:07,914 --> 00:19:13,520 ROBERT DeNIRO, WHATEVER. WON'T BE IN A SCORSESE MOVIE SO I'D DARKEN IT IN. 283 00:19:13,520 --> 00:19:15,155 FOR AUDITIONS, I'D GET NEWSPAPER PRINT AND PUT IT ON MY FACE TO GET THAT SORT OF 284 00:19:15,155 --> 00:19:18,558 DON JOHNSON SWARTHY -- >> Jimmy: IS THAT REAL >> YEAH -- 285 00:19:18,558 --> 00:19:22,762 >> Jimmy: AND DID IT - >> AND IT WORKED, YEAH IT MAKES YOU LOOK KIND OF LIKE, 286 00:19:22,762 --> 00:19:25,265 YOU KNOW -- RUGGED >> Jimmy: THE -- >> YEAH. 287 00:19:25,265 --> 00:19:28,068 >> Jimmy: I WOULD TOTALLY DO THAT >> IT WORKS. 288 00:19:28,068 --> 00:19:29,903 >> Jimmy: AND YOU GOT THE ROLES? >> AND NOW, WE HAVE MAKE-UP TO 289 00:19:29,903 --> 00:19:32,339 DO THAT. [ LAUGHTER ] >> Jimmy: BUT RUBBING NEWSPAPER 290 00:19:32,339 --> 00:19:36,309 ON THAT IS ACTUALLY -- I ENJOY THAT >> A LITTLE TRICK. 291 00:19:36,309 --> 00:19:38,878 A LITTLE TRICK >> Jimmy: I WANT TO TALK ABOUT "AMERICAN BUFFALO. 292 00:19:38,878 --> 00:19:41,481 >> YEAH, YEAH, YEAH, MAN THANKS FOR HAVING ME >> Jimmy: BECAUSE THIS IS -- 293 00:19:41,481 --> 00:19:43,883 OH, COME ON. YOU KNOW, WE LOVE YOU. I DON'T KNOW WHAT I WOULD DO 294 00:19:43,883 --> 00:19:46,653 WITHOUT SAM ROCKWELL MAN, I LOVE YOU BUDDY, COME ON BUT THIS PLAY WAS SUPPOSED TO 295 00:19:46,653 --> 00:19:52,325 BE - WAS IS IT TWO YEARS AGO? >> THIS IS SUPPOSED TO BE TWO 296 00:19:52,325 --> 00:19:53,727 YEARS AGO. WE'RE SHUT DOWN AT THE BEGINNING OF LOCKDOWN, 297 00:19:53,727 --> 00:19:56,896 PANDEMIC >> Jimmy: IS THAT TOUGH? >> IT WAS VERY TOUGH 298 00:19:56,896 --> 00:19:59,065 IT WAS KIND OF HEARTBREAKING OF COURSE, WE THOUGHT IT WOULD BE OVER IN TWO WEEKS OR 299 00:19:59,065 --> 00:20:02,502 A MONTH. AND SO, FISHBURNE AND I CONTINUED TO RUN LINES ON 300 00:20:02,502 --> 00:20:03,870 FACETIME AND ZOOM AND OCCASIONALLY NEIL THE DIRECTOR WOULD JOIN 301 00:20:03,870 --> 00:20:09,509 AND WE JUST DID IT BECAUSE WE WERE LOSING OUR MINDS. >> Jimmy: YEAH, THIS WILL BE 302 00:20:09,509 --> 00:20:12,679 OVER IN A MONTH. THIS WILL BE OVER. >> YEAH, AND SOMETIMES, EVEN 303 00:20:12,679 --> 00:20:14,247 THREE TIMES A WEEK, WE WOULD RUN LINES. BUT ALSO, JUST TO KEEP OUR 304 00:20:14,247 --> 00:20:20,553 SANITY I THINK >> Jimmy: JUST TO ENTERTAIN YOURSELF 305 00:20:20,553 --> 00:20:23,356 >> EXACTLY - >> Jimmy: DURING THE LOCKDOWN. >> DURING THE LOCKDOWN 306 00:20:23,356 --> 00:20:27,093 >> Jimmy: CAN YOU SET UP WHAT THE PLAY IS ABOUT. IT TAKE PLACE IN A PAWNSHOP. 307 00:20:27,093 --> 00:20:29,229 >> IT'S IN A PAWNSHOP. ALL THESE GUYS ARE EITHER THIEVES, JUNKIES, OR 308 00:20:29,229 --> 00:20:30,997 EX-CONVICTS AND THEY'RE ALL TRYING TO GET THIS AMERICAN BUFFALO NICKEL, WITH ALSO MAYBE 309 00:20:30,997 --> 00:20:32,499 THE HOPES OF HAVING A LOT OF OTHER VALUABLE NICKELS TO MAKE A LOT OF MONEY 310 00:20:32,499 --> 00:20:37,604 >> Jimmy: YEAH >> THAT'S WHAT THE PLAY IS ABOUT. 311 00:20:37,604 --> 00:20:52,152 IT'S KIND OF LIKE "SEINFELD," BUT STEALING [ LAUGHTER ] 312 00:20:52,152 --> 00:20:56,756 >> Jimmy: OKAY, YEAH BUT THIS IS YOUR CHARACTER, TEACH. 313 00:20:56,756 --> 00:20:59,125 >> YES, YES. >> Jimmy: TEACH IS THE CHARACTER. 314 00:20:59,125 --> 00:21:03,630 BEFORE THIS HAS BEEN PLAYED BY AL PACINO, ROBERT DUVALL, DUSTIN HOFFMAN 315 00:21:03,630 --> 00:21:08,535 >> THAT'S RIGHT. DID THEY HAVE A MUSTACHE >> Jimmy: I DON'T THINK SO 316 00:21:08,535 --> 00:21:12,572 WOULD YOU GET NERVOUS IF ANY OF THEM CAME? >> OH, YEAH, I WOULD BE VERY 317 00:21:12,572 --> 00:21:15,075 NERVOUS, YEAH. I DID "FOOL FOR LOVE" AND ED HARRIS ORIGINATED THAT ROLE 318 00:21:15,075 --> 00:21:26,286 AND I WOULD HAVE NIGHTMARES BECAUSE I USED TO DO THE LASSO WITH THAT. 319 00:21:26,286 --> 00:21:27,854 AND I HAD NIGHTMARES THAT ED HARRIS WOULD SEE ME LASSO REALLY BADLY 320 00:21:27,854 --> 00:21:31,758 AND ACTUALLY, HE CAME AND IT WENT PRETTY WELL I LASSOED GOOD THAT NIGHT. 321 00:21:31,758 --> 00:21:37,364 THANK GOD. >> Jimmy: HE DIDN'T STAND UP AND POINT AT YOU AND LAUGH 322 00:21:37,364 --> 00:21:45,605 [ LAUGHTER ] >> IN MY DREAMS. >> Jimmy: YEAH 323 00:21:45,605 --> 00:21:50,777 >> IN MY NIGHTMARES HE DID >> Jimmy: HE WOULD DO THAT >> YEAH. 324 00:21:50,777 --> 00:21:52,879 >> Jimmy: BUT IN REAL LIFE, NO ED HARRIS WAS A PRETTY GOOD GUY. 325 00:21:52,879 --> 00:21:54,781 >> HE WAS A GOOD GUY NO, IT WAS GREAT >> Jimmy: I'VE SEEN YOU ON 326 00:21:54,781 --> 00:21:56,750 BROADWAY IN ACTS >> YOU'VE SEEN ME ON THE BROADWAY 327 00:21:56,750 --> 00:21:58,318 >> Jimmy: I'VE SEEN YOU ON THE BROADWAY >> YES, YES. 328 00:21:58,318 --> 00:21:59,753 >> Jimmy: BUT DOES IT BUM YOU OUT WHEN YOU HAVE FRIENDS IN THE CROWD? 329 00:21:59,753 --> 00:22:01,955 >> I DON'T LIKE TO KNOW WHEN PEOPLE ARE OUT THERE >> Jimmy: REALLY 330 00:22:01,955 --> 00:22:03,790 >> I THINK FISHBURNE AND DARREN DON'T MIND >> Jimmy: BECAUSE WHY? 331 00:22:03,790 --> 00:22:06,726 DO YOU TRY TO PUT TOO MUCH MUSTER ON IT >> YEAH, EXACTLY, EXACTLY. 332 00:22:06,726 --> 00:22:09,763 >> Jimmy: DID YOU TRY TO SHOW ME YOUR CHOPS TOO MUCH >> HEY, CALM DOWN. 333 00:22:09,763 --> 00:22:11,898 >> Jimmy: YOU GOT THE OSCAR, BUD, WE'RE GOOD. I KNOW HOW GOOD YOU ARE. 334 00:22:11,898 --> 00:22:14,968 >> DUDE, RELAX >> Jimmy: JIMMY FALLON, MAN, THAT'S GOOD. 335 00:22:14,968 --> 00:22:17,070 AND YOU'RE LIKE, "JIMMY, SIT DOWN." YOU'RE NOT BOTHERING ME. 336 00:22:17,070 --> 00:22:20,573 IT'S ED HARRIS IS BOTHERING ME I DON'T CARE IF YOU'RE HERE, BUDDY. 337 00:22:20,573 --> 00:22:23,243 BUT I DON'T KNOW - >> NO, THAT WOULD MAKE ME NERVOUS IF YOU WERE THERE, YOU 338 00:22:23,243 --> 00:22:25,311 AND NANCY. >> Jimmy: I DON'T KNOW IF I WOULD COME BACK TO SEE YOU 339 00:22:25,311 --> 00:22:29,249 IS THAT RUDE >> NO, YOU KNOW WHAT THAT'S ACTUALLY NOT RUDE 340 00:22:29,249 --> 00:22:34,587 I THINK IT'S ACTUALLY GOOD LET THE ACTORS, YOU KNOW - >> Jimmy: WONDER 341 00:22:34,587 --> 00:22:40,226 >> YEAH. [ LAUGHTER ] >> Jimmy: THEY'D PROBABLY 342 00:22:40,226 --> 00:22:43,496 ENJOYED IT >> BUT ALSO, JUST, LIKE, JUST LET THEM GO TO BED 343 00:22:43,496 --> 00:22:45,465 YOU KNOW, YOU DON'T HAVE TO -- >> Jimmy: THAT'S WHAT I'M SAYING 344 00:22:45,465 --> 00:22:46,966 >> I JUST GO -- YOU JUST PERFORMED FOR ME AMAZING FOR AN HOUR AND A HALF. 345 00:22:46,966 --> 00:22:48,668 THEN YOU GOT TO DO LIKE BACKSTAGE TALK SHOW. >> Jimmy: THEN I GOT TO DO A 346 00:22:48,668 --> 00:22:50,770 A MEET AND GREET YEAH HEY, DO YOU MIND, "SAM, CAN I 347 00:22:50,770 --> 00:22:52,605 GET A SELFIE?" AND YOU GO, "YEAH, JIMMY, I CAN BUT I JUST ENTERTAINED YOU FOR 348 00:22:52,605 --> 00:22:54,541 TWO HOURS, BUD." BUT I FEEL BAD >> YOU WANT TO GO TO SLEEP 349 00:22:54,541 --> 00:22:56,776 AFTER YOU DO THIS, RIGHT YOU WANT TO GO TO BED. >> Jimmy: YES. 350 00:22:56,776 --> 00:22:58,611 >> YEAH. >> Jimmy: AND YOU KNOW IT SO WELL, YOU'RE LIKE -- I'M IN THE 351 00:22:58,611 --> 00:23:00,046 ZONE >> I NEVER FEEL ON CRUISE CONTROL WITH THIS THING. 352 00:23:00,046 --> 00:23:02,215 I ALWAYS FEEL LIKE, "OH, YOU BETTER STAY ON THE TRACKS. >> Jimmy: REALLY 353 00:23:02,215 --> 00:23:04,484 >> YEAH. >> Jimmy: BECAUSE YOU'RE IN THE CIRCLE IN THE SQUARE 354 00:23:04,484 --> 00:23:06,286 >> YEAH. >> Jimmy: WHICH IS -- THE AUDIENCE IS AROUND YOU 355 00:23:06,286 --> 00:23:08,955 >> YEAH. IT'S SO EASY TO FALL OFF THE TRAIN TRACKS 356 00:23:08,955 --> 00:23:11,458 AS YOU KNOW WITH "SNL" AND STUFF -- >> Jimmy: YOU'VE GOT TO BE 357 00:23:11,458 --> 00:23:14,661 FOCUSED. >> YOU'VE GOT TO BE FOCUSED LIVE 358 00:23:14,661 --> 00:23:19,466 >> Jimmy: YEAH, NO, I NEVER BROKE CHARACTER. [ LAUGHTER ] 359 00:23:19,466 --> 00:23:27,741 >> YEAH. >> Jimmy: I WAS -- >> YOU NEVER CORPSED 360 00:23:27,741 --> 00:23:32,078 >> Jimmy: NO, I NEVER CORPSED. >> NO, YOU NEVER CORPSED >> Jimmy: BUT SEE, I WOULD 361 00:23:32,078 --> 00:23:36,116 BE - BECAUSE THE CROWD IS RIGHT UP ON YOU THERE 362 00:23:36,116 --> 00:23:37,884 I WOULD BE -- BECAUSE THE CROWD IS RIGHT UP ON YOU THERE, I WOULD BE DISTRACTED BY -- 363 00:23:37,884 --> 00:23:39,753 BECAUSE I'VE BEEN TO MANY A'PLAY AND SOMEONE ALWAYS NEXT TO ME IS ALWAYS COUGHING, LIKE 364 00:23:39,753 --> 00:23:43,356 A DECENT PHLEGMY COUGH WHEREVER I GO, WHATEVER NIGHT, IT'S LIKE -- 365 00:23:43,356 --> 00:23:51,097 [ IMITATING COUGH >> YOU'D THINK THEY HAVE TUBERCULOSIS 366 00:23:51,097 --> 00:23:56,803 >> Jimmy: I WANT THEM TO GO ON STAGE. SHOW ME THE DYING SCENE. 367 00:23:56,803 --> 00:23:58,471 >> THANK GOD THEY HAVE MASKS NOW. >> Jimmy: I KNOW 368 00:23:58,471 --> 00:24:06,046 >> IT MAKES SENSE. THERE WAS A GUY SLEEPING IN THE FRONT ROW THE OTHER DAY. 369 00:24:06,046 --> 00:24:11,217 I SAID TO THE OFFICIAL, "YOU SEE THAT LAWRENCE? THE GUY WAS OUT THERE SLEEPING 370 00:24:11,217 --> 00:24:13,586 ON THE FRONT ROW." >> Jimmy: ISN'T THAT UNBELIEVABLE 371 00:24:13,586 --> 00:24:15,855 IT'S DARK, IT'S WARM >> YEAH. >> Jimmy: RIGHT, AND YOU'RE 372 00:24:15,855 --> 00:24:18,558 LIKE, I'M IN A GOOD SPOT RIGHT NOW. >> IN THE FRONT ROW. 373 00:24:18,558 --> 00:24:20,760 THE BALLS ON THE GUY >> Jimmy: WHAT IN THE WORLD THIS GUY GOT TICKETS TO GO SEE 374 00:24:20,760 --> 00:24:28,735 GREAT ACTORS - >> I GOT PRETTY LOUD THOUGH. I TRIED TO WAKE HIM UP 375 00:24:28,735 --> 00:24:31,571 I GOT PRETTY LOUD. [ LAUGHTER ] >> Jimmy: YEAH, THAT'S WHAT I 376 00:24:31,571 --> 00:24:33,640 WOULD DO TOO ALSO PROJECT A LITTLE BIT. YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN 377 00:24:33,640 --> 00:24:38,244 >> SPIT. A LITTLE ANGER >> Jimmy: SORRY I HAD TO WAKE 378 00:24:38,244 --> 00:24:39,913 YOU UP FROM YOUR NAP THERE, BUDDY. >> JUST DOING A LITTLE SHOW 379 00:24:39,913 --> 00:24:43,416 HERE >> Jimmy: NOT A BIG DEAL WE JUST WORKED TWO YEARS ON 380 00:24:43,416 --> 00:24:46,786 THIS SORRY, BUDDY "AMERICAN BUFFALO" RIGHT NOW ON 381 00:24:46,786 --> 00:24:50,256 BROADWAY I WANT TO TALK ABOUT "THE BAD GUYS" MORE AFTER THE BREAK 382 00:24:50,256 --> 00:24:54,761 COME ON BACK MORE WITH SAM ROCKWELL, EVERYBODY. 383 00:24:54,761 --> 00:25:19,886 [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE * >> Jimmy: YOU'RE NOT ON SOCIAL 384 00:25:19,886 --> 00:25:22,055 MEDIAS >> I'M NOT ON SOCIAL MEDIA, NO, I'M NOT. 385 00:25:22,055 --> 00:25:24,057 >> Jimmy: AT ALL AND IS THAT A CHOICE OR YOU JUST --? 386 00:25:24,057 --> 00:25:26,326 >> I JUST DON'T -- I CAN'T -- HAVE THE ENERGY FOR IT, I THINK. 387 00:25:26,326 --> 00:25:29,362 >> Jimmy: YEAH NEVER GOT INTO IT? >> NO, BUT I LIKE THE STUFF -- 388 00:25:29,362 --> 00:25:32,198 SOME OF MY FRIENDS WILL SEND ME STUFF THAT MAKES ME LAUGH, AND THAT'S - 389 00:25:32,198 --> 00:25:35,435 >> Jimmy: LIKE A TEXT OR EMAIL >> YEAH, SOMETHING >> Jimmy: SO, YOU CAN'T REALLY 390 00:25:35,435 --> 00:25:38,204 GET AWAY FROM IT ALL >> I CAN'T REALLY GET AWAY FROM IT ALL 391 00:25:38,204 --> 00:25:40,173 >> Jimmy: NO >> THEY'LL SEND SOME FUNNY THINGS 392 00:25:40,173 --> 00:25:43,376 BECAUSE THEY'RE ALL DEGENERATES, MY FRIENDS. [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] 393 00:25:43,376 --> 00:25:45,211 >> Jimmy: YEAH, EXACTLY. I'M FRIENDS WITH SOME OF YOUR FRIENDS. 394 00:25:45,211 --> 00:25:47,380 >> YEAH. >> Jimmy: I FOUND SOMETHING THAT I WOULD SEND TO YOU IF YOU 395 00:25:47,380 --> 00:25:49,382 WERE ON SOCIAL MEDIA >> OKAY, SHOW ME >> Jimmy: THIS IS FROM NEW YORK 396 00:25:49,382 --> 00:25:54,120 MAGAZINE, A GREAT MAGAZINE IT'S "THE CUT," IT SAYS, "SAM ROCKWELL IS TOTALLY KINDA HOT? 397 00:25:54,120 --> 00:25:59,092 [ LAUGHTER ] >> I LIKE THE -- >> Jimmy: YOU LIKE THIS? 398 00:25:59,092 --> 00:26:01,561 >> THE ENTHUSIASM AND THEN THE TREPIDATION KIND OF. [ LAUGHTER ] 399 00:26:01,561 --> 00:26:04,531 >> Jimmy: NO, THIS IS ALL -- >> "TOTALLY KIND OF. >> Jimmy: NO, THIS IS A FULL 400 00:26:04,531 --> 00:26:06,032 ON -- THIS IS A GREAT ARTICLE FOR YOU. "SAM ROCKWELL IS TOTALLY KINDA 401 00:26:06,032 --> 00:26:10,036 HOT? >> I'LL TAKE IT. I'LL TAKE KINDA. 402 00:26:10,036 --> 00:26:11,504 >> Jimmy: YOU WANT NO QUESTION MARK >> NO, I'LL TAKE IT. 403 00:26:11,504 --> 00:26:13,340 LISTEN - >> Jimmy: YOU WANT AN EXCLAMATION POINT. 404 00:26:13,340 --> 00:26:15,542 >> I'LL TAKE WHATEVER I CAN GET. [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] 405 00:26:15,542 --> 00:26:18,745 YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN >> Jimmy: I COULD SEE THE TREPIDATION THERE, YEAH. 406 00:26:18,745 --> 00:26:21,715 IT WOULD BUM ME OUT. >> NO, BUT "TOTALLY" IS GREAT. AND THEN "KINDA" -- YOU KNOW 407 00:26:21,715 --> 00:26:26,052 [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] >> Jimmy: BUT -- AND THE QUESTION MARK IS A BUMMER TOO. 408 00:26:26,052 --> 00:26:27,854 [ LAUGHTER ] I WAS ON A GOLF MAGAZINE ONCE AND IT SAYS, "JIMMY FALLON 409 00:26:27,854 --> 00:26:30,090 PLAYS GOLF?" >> AND THEN THERE'S A QUESTION MARK 410 00:26:30,090 --> 00:26:36,096 >> Jimmy: A QUESTION MARK. >> GOLF? YOU'RE LIKE, "WHY WOULDN'T I 411 00:26:36,096 --> 00:26:38,765 PLAY GOLF? >> Jimmy: I'M ON THE COVER OF THIS MAGAZINE. 412 00:26:38,765 --> 00:26:41,267 YOU BETTER PLAY GOLF WHAT AM I THERE FOR? >> LISTEN, IT COULD BE WORSE, 413 00:26:41,267 --> 00:26:45,205 YOU KNOW >> Jimmy: YEAH, I GUESS. "KIND OF PLAYS GOLF? 414 00:26:45,205 --> 00:26:47,340 [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] COULD IT BE WORSE? CAN WE TALK ABOUT "THE BAD 415 00:26:47,340 --> 00:26:52,345 GUYS"? >> YES, "BAD GUYS. >> Jimmy: THIS IS GOING TO BE 416 00:26:52,345 --> 00:26:56,249 A GIANT MOVIE THIS WEEK. [ APPLAUSE ] >> THIS IS A REALLY FUN MOVIE. 417 00:26:56,249 --> 00:27:00,053 AND WE SPENT A LONG TIME DOING IT AND IT'S FUN. >> Jimmy: THE PREMISE IS GREAT 418 00:27:00,053 --> 00:27:03,690 >> IT'S REALLY FUN IT'S AN AUSTRALIAN COMIC BOOK. >> Jimmy: YEAH 419 00:27:03,690 --> 00:27:05,392 WHERE ALL THE BAD GUYS GET TOGETHER AND THEY GO, "HEY, WHAT IF WE WERE GOOD?" 420 00:27:05,392 --> 00:27:10,697 >> YEAH, THEY TRY TO TURN GOOD >> Jimmy: WHAT IF WE CAN BE GOOD 421 00:27:10,697 --> 00:27:12,632 AND THEY -- IT FEELS GOOD TO DO GOOD >> YEAH. 422 00:27:12,632 --> 00:27:14,234 >> Jimmy: AND LET'S SEE IF WE CAN DO IT. AND WELL, WE'LL SEE IF THEY CAN 423 00:27:14,234 --> 00:27:18,071 DO IT OR NOT >> YEAH. IT'S KIND OF LIKE THEY'RE -- 424 00:27:18,071 --> 00:27:21,708 IT'S KIND OF LIKE AN "OCEAN'S 11" FOR KIDS, I GUESS. [ LAUGHTER ] 425 00:27:21,708 --> 00:27:24,077 >> Jimmy: YEAH >> LIKE A "RESERVOIR DOGS" FOR KIDS 426 00:27:24,077 --> 00:27:26,046 >> Jimmy: IT IS LIKE A A "RESERVOIR DOGS" FOR KIDS. >> YEAH. 427 00:27:26,046 --> 00:27:28,114 >> Jimmy: YEAH IT'S REALLY GOOD I, YOU KNOW, I LOVE YOUR 428 00:27:28,114 --> 00:27:30,250 DANCING. I ALWAYS MAKE YOU DANCE EVERY TIME YOU COME ON EVEN IF YOU 429 00:27:30,250 --> 00:27:34,287 DON'T WANT TO. SO I APPRECIATE YOU DOING IT AND HUMORING ME. 430 00:27:34,287 --> 00:27:38,925 BUT IN THIS MOVIE, YOUR CHARACTER, MR. WOLF, IS ACTUALLY A GREAT DANCER. 431 00:27:38,925 --> 00:27:42,429 AND YOU ACTUALLY GOT THE DIRECTOR TO HIRE A A CHOREOGRAPHER? 432 00:27:42,429 --> 00:27:44,831 >> YEAH. >> Jimmy: FOR THE CARTOON? >> WELL, THEY WANTED TO REALLY 433 00:27:44,831 --> 00:27:48,268 MAKE IT REAL, SO THEY -- UNFORTUNATELY, ZAZIE AND I COULDN'T GET TOGETHER. 434 00:27:48,268 --> 00:27:50,804 SHE WAS NOT -- JUST ON A -- WE WERE IN DIFFERENT PARTS OF THE WORLD. 435 00:27:50,804 --> 00:27:54,507 BUT THEY GOT SUSIE MISNER, WHO CHOREOGRAPHED "FOSSE/VERDON. SO SHE PUT IT -- SUSIE PUT IT 436 00:27:54,507 --> 00:27:57,243 TOGETHER AND SHE KNOWS SOME OF MY MOVES, AND SHE -- WE WANTED TO GET 437 00:27:57,243 --> 00:27:59,479 TOGETHER WITH ZAZIE AND SUSIE, BUT WE NEVER HAD THE TIME AND STUFF, SO. 438 00:27:59,479 --> 00:28:04,250 >> Jimmy: IT'S FANTASTIC I WANT TO SHOW EVERYONE A CLIP HERE'S A PEEK AT "THE BAD 439 00:28:04,250 --> 00:28:07,454 GUYS." TAKE A LOOK AT THIS. 440 00:28:12,192 --> 00:28:15,295 >> THEY STOLE THE GOLDEN DOLPHIN! >> COME ON 441 00:28:15,295 --> 00:28:20,600 YOU CAN'T PROVE THAT [ CLANG >> MY BABY 442 00:28:20,600 --> 00:28:24,404 >> ON YOUR KNEES, BAD GUYS, WITH YOUR HANDS UP >> NEVER 443 00:28:24,404 --> 00:28:29,442 WE'RE OUTTA HERE * SO LONG, SUCKAS! 444 00:28:29,442 --> 00:28:38,852 * [ LAUGHTER ] >> WELL, THIS JUST GOT A LITTLE 445 00:28:38,852 --> 00:28:42,822 WEIRD. >> Jimmy: THAT'S EXACTLY RIGHT [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE 446 00:28:42,822 --> 00:28:45,225 >> YEAH, HEY >> Jimmy: SAM ROCKWELL, EVERYBODY! 447 00:28:45,225 --> 00:28:49,429 "THE BAD GUYS" HITS THEATERS FRIDAY [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE 448 00:28:49,429 --> 00:28:51,231 AND CHECK OUT "AMERICAN BUFFALO" WHEN YOU CAN, OVER AT THE CIRCLE IN THE SQUARE 449 00:28:51,231 --> 00:28:53,900 THEATER. WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK WITH PAMELA ADLON, EVERYONE 450 00:28:53,900 --> 00:28:56,436 STICK AROUND SAM ROCKWELL [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE 451 00:28:56,436 --> 00:29:14,688 * >> Jimmy: OUR NEXT GUEST IS AN EMMY-WINNING ACTOR, WRITER, 452 00:29:14,688 --> 00:29:16,523 DIRECTOR, AND PRODUCER WHOSE SHOW "BETTER THINGS" WILL AIR ITS SERIES FINALE NEXT MONDAY 453 00:29:16,523 --> 00:29:23,363 AT 10:00 P.M IT IS A FANTASTIC SHOW ON FX AND HULU 454 00:29:23,363 --> 00:29:28,935 PLEASE WELCOME BACK TO THE SHOW PAMELA ADLON 455 00:29:34,374 --> 00:29:53,727 * * [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE 456 00:29:53,727 --> 00:29:57,130 >> Jimmy: THAT'S PAMELA ADLON, COME ON! COME ON, BUD 457 00:29:57,130 --> 00:30:01,701 WELCOME BACK TO THE SHOW I'VE ALWAYS LOVED SEEING YOU AND I WANT TO TALK ABOUT THE - 458 00:30:01,701 --> 00:30:04,804 >> THANK YOU FOR HAVING ME >> Jimmy: OH, COME ON. THE SERIES - 459 00:30:04,804 --> 00:30:08,408 >> HELLO IS THIS REAL [ LAUGHTER ] 460 00:30:08,408 --> 00:30:09,843 >> Jimmy: NO, THIS IS CHOCOLATE. IT'S CAKE. 461 00:30:09,843 --> 00:30:12,912 "IS IT CAKE? >> OH, YEAH. "IS IT CAKE. 462 00:30:12,912 --> 00:30:16,816 >> Jimmy: YEAH, YEAH THANK YOU. >> OH, YEAH. 463 00:30:16,816 --> 00:30:18,284 I WANT TO TALK TO YOU ABOUT, OBVIOUSLY, THE SUCCESS OF "BETTER THINGS." 464 00:30:18,284 --> 00:30:20,587 THE SERIES FINALE. LISTEN TO SOME OF THESE REVIEWS. 465 00:30:20,587 --> 00:30:23,656 "HOLLYWOOD REPORTER," VERY IMPORTANT. THEY SAY, "THE FIFTH SEASON OF 466 00:30:23,656 --> 00:30:27,560 'BETTER THINGS' IS THE BEST TV SHOW OF THE YEAR THUS FAR. THIS SHOW IMPACTS THE WAY I SEE 467 00:30:27,560 --> 00:30:35,535 EVERYTHING AROUND ME." >> APRIL [ LAUGHTER ] 468 00:30:35,535 --> 00:30:37,070 >> Jimmy: THAT'S HOLLYWOOD REPORTER "VARIETY" SAYS, "THE FINAL 469 00:30:37,070 --> 00:30:38,938 SEASON OF 'BETTER THINGS' IS A A MOMENT OF CHANGE FOR TV. "TIME MAGAZINE," "THE FINAL 470 00:30:38,938 --> 00:30:40,874 SEASON OF "BETTER THINGS" IS PAMELA ADLON'S MASTERPIECE." AND RIGHT NOW IT'S 100% FRESH 471 00:30:40,874 --> 00:30:45,211 ON ROTTEN TOMATOES LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, WHAT MORE CAN I SAY? 472 00:30:45,211 --> 00:30:48,181 [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE WHAT MORE CAN I SAY ABOUT "BETTER THINGS" EXCEPT IT 473 00:30:48,181 --> 00:30:54,020 DOESN'T GET BETTER >> THANK YOU >> Jimmy: AND THEN THE 474 00:30:54,020 --> 00:30:57,123 PODCAST -- >> YEAH. >> Jimmy: IF YOU LIKE 475 00:30:57,123 --> 00:30:59,626 PODCASTS - >> YES >> Jimmy: -- LISTEN TO THE 476 00:30:59,626 --> 00:31:02,696 "BETTER THINGS" PODCAST. >> YES WE HAVE A COMP -- I WANTED TO 477 00:31:02,696 --> 00:31:04,798 DO IT. I WANTED TO BE LIKE OTHER PEOPLE AND, LIKE, REAL TV 478 00:31:04,798 --> 00:31:07,634 SHOWS. SO, I WAS, LIKE, LET ME DO WHAT THESE PEOPLE ARE DOING 479 00:31:07,634 --> 00:31:13,073 >> Jimmy: YOU ARE. YES. >> LIKE, A COMPANION - 480 00:31:13,073 --> 00:31:17,177 SO, I TALK ABOUT THE WHOLE SEASON BUT THEN I HAVE, LIKE, A 481 00:31:17,177 --> 00:31:19,913 A DIFFERENT PERSON ON. AND SO, LIKE, I JUST HAD CREE SUMMER. 482 00:31:19,913 --> 00:31:22,549 SHE JUST DID THE LAST ONE WITH ME AND WE TALKED ABOUT BEING O.G. 483 00:31:22,549 --> 00:31:25,085 VOICEOVER PEOPLE AND WE DO, LIKE, DEEP DIVES. AND THEN AFTER THE SHOW'S OVER, 484 00:31:25,085 --> 00:31:27,320 I'M GOING TO KEEP THE PODCAST GOING BECAUSE I WANT TO BE LIKE HUELL HOWSER BASICALLY OR 485 00:31:27,320 --> 00:31:28,888 MISTER ROGERS. >> Jimmy: YOU RECENTLY JUST TOLD THE STORY ABOUT HOW YOU 486 00:31:28,888 --> 00:31:30,857 FILMED THIS SEASON, OF COURSE, DURING THE PANDEMIC AND THIS IS WHEN IT WAS TOUGH TO FILM. 487 00:31:30,857 --> 00:31:40,133 YOU ACTUALLY FILMED A LOT OF IT IN LONDON. >> YES, WE HAD TO BECAUSE -- SO 488 00:31:40,133 --> 00:31:48,842 CELIA IMRIE, WHO PLAYS MY MOM -- >> Jimmy: AMAZING. 489 00:31:48,842 --> 00:31:53,346 >> -- SHE DOESN'T FLY, HISTORICALLY, AND IT'S NOT BECAUSE SHE'S A DIVA 490 00:31:53,346 --> 00:32:00,587 SHE HAS A HEART -- >> Jimmy: OKAY, A MEDICAL CONDITION, SURE. 491 00:32:00,587 --> 00:32:03,790 >> A MEDICAL REASON. >> Jimmy: SURE >> AND SO SHE WOULD TAKE, LIKE, 492 00:32:03,790 --> 00:32:05,592 THE KIWI TWO EVERY YEAR, LIKE THE "YENTL," "PAPA WATCH ME FLY," LIKE, ON THE FRONT OF THE 493 00:32:05,592 --> 00:32:07,293 BOAT BUT THEY WEREN'T BOOKING PASSENGERS 494 00:32:07,293 --> 00:32:12,365 [ LAUGHTER ] >> Jimmy: THE YENTL. >> THANK YOU 495 00:32:12,365 --> 00:32:15,702 >> Jimmy: OH, MY GOSH. >> THANK YOU >> Jimmy: THAT IS SO FUNNY 496 00:32:15,702 --> 00:32:17,804 >> I KNEW YOU WOULD KNOW >> Jimmy: BARBRA STREISAND, LOVE THAT. 497 00:32:17,804 --> 00:32:19,305 >> YEAH, AND SO, THEY WEREN'T BOOKING PASSAGE BECAUSE OF COVID THIS YEAR. 498 00:32:19,305 --> 00:32:21,074 AND I'M LIKE, I CAN'T DO A A WHOLE SEASON BECAUSE IT'S THREE GENERATIONS OF WOMEN ON 499 00:32:21,074 --> 00:32:22,075 MY SHOW. AND I CAN'T HAVE PHYL, LIKE, ON ZOOM 500 00:32:22,075 --> 00:32:23,543 SO, WE -- I MEAN, WE WENT THROUGH EVERYTHING FX, MY NETWORK AT ONE POINT, 501 00:32:23,543 --> 00:32:25,378 THEY WERE LIKE, "WE FOUND A BOAT IT COSTS A MILLION DOLLARS." 502 00:32:25,378 --> 00:32:27,914 AND I WAS LIKE, "WHAT? "YOU'RE GOING TO PUT THE OLD LADY ON THE BOAT?" 503 00:32:27,914 --> 00:32:38,792 "CAN IT GO MID-ATLANTIC? LIKE, IS THAT SAFE?" >> Jimmy: NO, THIS IS 504 00:32:38,792 --> 00:32:42,562 A TERRIBLE THING TO DO >> SO, THEN, WE JUST EVENTUALLY FIGURED OUT HOW TO SHOOT HER 505 00:32:42,562 --> 00:32:45,832 SCENES ALL IN ENGLAND. SO, ANY TIME YOU SEE PHYL THIS SEASON, WE'RE IN ENGLAND WITH 506 00:32:45,832 --> 00:32:55,442 HER. >> Jimmy: WOW! AND THE MAGIC OF - 507 00:32:55,442 --> 00:33:01,214 AND THEY JUST MADE IT LOOK LIKE - >> AND BEAUTIFUL 508 00:33:01,214 --> 00:33:03,883 >> Jimmy: -- SEAMLESS. >> MY PRODUCTION DESIGNERS, THE ART DEPARTMENT, EVERYBODY 509 00:33:03,883 --> 00:33:06,386 WORKED SO HARD THEY WERE INCREDIBLE >> Jimmy: I LOVE THE MUSIC IN 510 00:33:06,386 --> 00:33:08,755 THE SHOW, AND I KNOW THIS SEASON YOU START OFF WITH A LITTLE MONTY PYTHON. 511 00:33:08,755 --> 00:33:12,926 >> I THOUGHT, YOU KNOW, BECAUSE PEOPLE SAID, "ARE YOU GOING TO ADDRESS COVID IN THE SHOW. 512 00:33:12,926 --> 00:33:16,896 AND, I WENT THROUGH ALL THESE, KIND OF, MACHINATIONS. AND I THOUGHT, "MAYBE WE'LL DO 513 00:33:16,896 --> 00:33:22,736 IT IN FLASHBACKS." AND I'M LIKE, "NO IT'S STILL GOING TO BE AROUND." 514 00:33:22,736 --> 00:33:24,537 BECAUSE, I REMEMBER, I WAS HERE, LIKE TWO NIGHTS BEFORE EVERYTHING GOT SHUT DOWN 515 00:33:24,537 --> 00:33:28,608 >> Jimmy: I REMEMBER THIS. >> REMEMBER I HAD THE THIEVES SPRAY. 516 00:33:28,608 --> 00:33:33,947 >> Jimmy: I DO REMEMBER THAT >> I WOULDN'T SHAKE YOUR HAND, BUT I SHOOK RACHEL MADDOW'S 517 00:33:33,947 --> 00:33:36,983 HAND >> Jimmy: YOU BASICALLY -- YOU HUGGED RACHEL -- 518 00:33:36,983 --> 00:33:40,620 [ LAUGHTER ] >> I LICKED HER. >> Jimmy: YOU HUGGED 519 00:33:40,620 --> 00:33:43,156 RACHEL MADDOW. >> I WAS LIKE, "NO, BRO. >> Jimmy: YEAH, YOU'RE LIKE, 520 00:33:43,156 --> 00:33:45,859 "JIMMY, CHILL, MAN." >> YES, EXACTLY. >> Jimmy: AND THEN, 521 00:33:45,859 --> 00:33:48,661 "RACHEL MADDOW, HI." [ LAUGHTER ] AND I GO, "HEY, WHAT AM I? 522 00:33:48,661 --> 00:33:50,997 I WATCHED IT HAPPEN. YES. >> SO, I WANTED TO COME BACK 523 00:33:50,997 --> 00:33:52,832 WITH HEARING ERIC IDLE START THE SONG >> Jimmy: WHAT DOES HE SAY 524 00:33:52,832 --> 00:33:54,901 AGAIN? >> HE SAYS, "WHENEVER LIFE GETS YOU DOWN, MRS. BROWN, AND 525 00:33:54,901 --> 00:33:56,870 THINGS SEEM HARD OR TOUGH AND PEOPLE ARE STUPID, OBNOXIOUS OR DAFT, AND YOU FEEL LIKE YOU'VE 526 00:33:56,870 --> 00:33:58,605 HAD QUITE ENOUGH, JUST REMEMBER THAT YOU'RE STANDING ON A PLANET THAT'S EVOLVE -- 527 00:33:58,605 --> 00:33:59,506 EVOLVING YEAH I DON'T WANT TO -- IT'S 528 00:33:59,506 --> 00:34:14,220 ERIC IDLE. IT'S NOT >> Jimmy: THAT'S BRILLIANT 529 00:34:14,220 --> 00:34:23,063 >> BUT IT'S ABOUT THE BIGNESS OF THE UNIVERSE. AND IT'S LIKE -- 530 00:34:23,063 --> 00:34:25,065 >> Jimmy: HOW SMALL WE ACTUALLY ARE. >> HOW SMALL WE ARE. 531 00:34:25,065 --> 00:34:26,633 AND IT'S JUST, YOU KNOW, THAT PEOPLE GET REALLY -- EVERYTHING'S REALLY MESSED UP 532 00:34:26,633 --> 00:34:29,135 RIGHT NOW. AND WE CAN FEEL REALLY BAD BUT THERE ARE SO MANY GOOD 533 00:34:29,135 --> 00:34:31,071 THINGS HAPPENING, AND YOU CAN'T SIT THERE AND GO, "I CAN'T HELP THIS, I CAN'T HELP THAT, SO I'M 534 00:34:31,071 --> 00:34:33,773 NOT GOING TO HELP ANYTHING." PICK A THING PICK A THING 535 00:34:33,773 --> 00:34:48,488 >> Jimmy: YEAH >> AND THEN YOU CAN MAKE A A CHANGE 536 00:34:48,488 --> 00:34:51,725 >> Jimmy: YEAH THAT'S WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT. THAT'S EXACTLY THE VIBE. 537 00:34:51,725 --> 00:34:55,929 [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE THAT'S WHAT I WANT I'M GOING TO BE SAD TO SEE IT 538 00:34:55,929 --> 00:34:57,897 GO BUT THIS IS YOUR BABY. I MEAN, YOU'VE PUT A LOT OF 539 00:34:57,897 --> 00:35:01,067 YOUR LIFE INTO THIS. >> YEAH, I AM GRATEFUL >> Jimmy: HEART AND SOUL AND 540 00:35:01,067 --> 00:35:04,871 SWEAT. YEAH, WELL DONE. >> THANK YOU 541 00:35:04,871 --> 00:35:07,941 I WANT TO SHOW EVERYONE A CLIP HERE'S PAMELA ADLON IN "BETTER THINGS." 542 00:35:07,941 --> 00:35:08,742 THINGS." TAKE A LOOK. 543 00:35:09,275 --> 00:35:10,443 >> MY HEAD IS SPINNING 544 00:35:10,443 --> 00:35:12,846 >> I'LL GET YOU SOME CRACKERS. >> OOMPH, PHYL MOM. 545 00:35:12,846 --> 00:35:14,948 LET'S TAKE A PICTURE WE HARDLY HAVE ANY GOOD PICTURES ON THIS TRIP TOGETHER 546 00:35:14,948 --> 00:35:22,622 >> ABSOLUTELY NOT. MY HAIR. >> COME HERE 547 00:35:22,622 --> 00:35:25,425 >> DON'T GRAB ME I'M NOT THE CAT'S LITTER >> ONE SEC, I LOVE THESE 548 00:35:25,425 --> 00:35:28,928 STAIRS JUST ONE COOL -- JUST STAND STILL. 549 00:35:28,928 --> 00:35:33,400 >> I'VE TOLD YOU MANY TIMES, I DON'T LIKE A HAND ON MY SHOULDER 550 00:35:33,400 --> 00:35:39,973 >> I WANT ONE COOL SELFIE. [ TUMBLING ] >> SAM 551 00:35:39,973 --> 00:35:41,775 >> Jimmy: PAMELA ADLON, EVERYBODY. [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE 552 00:35:41,775 --> 00:35:43,610 THE FINAL EPISODE OF "BETTER THINGS" AIRS NEXT MONDAY AT 10:00 P.M. ON FX AND HULU. 553 00:35:43,610 --> 00:35:44,911 WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK WITH A A PERFORMANCE FROM GANG OF YOUTHS 554 00:35:44,911 --> 00:36:10,236 STICK AROUND [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE * 555 00:36:10,236 --> 00:36:12,138 >> Jimmy: PERFORMING "IN THE WAKE OF YOUR LEAVE" FROM THEIR NEW ALBUM "ANGEL IN REALTIME," 556 00:36:12,138 --> 00:36:18,311 NEW ALBUM "ANGEL IN REALTIME," GIVE IT UP FOR GANG OF YOUTHS. 557 00:36:20,046 --> 00:36:21,715 [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE 558 00:36:21,715 --> 00:36:39,065 [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE * 559 00:36:41,368 --> 00:36:57,083 * 560 00:36:57,083 --> 00:37:02,422 * * SO AS YOU CANYONEERED FROM OUR WORLD UPWARDS 561 00:37:02,422 --> 00:37:08,028 AND THE ANGELS TOOK THEIR PLACE * * I WAS THE LOSER 562 00:37:08,028 --> 00:37:15,802 AT YOUR FUNERA WITH NO EMOTION CONVEYED IT WAS DRAWN OUT IN VAIN * 563 00:37:15,802 --> 00:37:18,104 * AND THE IDIOT I A JUST FIGURED IN THE WAKE OF YOUR LEAVE * 564 00:37:18,104 --> 00:37:26,079 * THAT I'D NEVE HEAR FROM YOU AGAI AND THEN I'D SIN 565 00:37:26,079 --> 00:37:31,818 WITH ALL THIS FEELING * * THAT YOUR SPIRI WOULD AFFORD M 566 00:37:31,818 --> 00:37:34,487 MY HAN ON HEART * * IT'S NOT A THIN 567 00:37:34,487 --> 00:37:38,525 THAT I'VE BEEN DREAMING OF AND IT GOES WITHOU MY BLESSING * 568 00:37:38,525 --> 00:37:43,563 * AND LEAVES ME IN A RU BUT IT COMES AND GOE AND SHOWS ME 569 00:37:43,563 --> 00:37:49,069 ALL I'M MISSING * * AND IT COMES AND GOES ALL RIGHT * 570 00:37:49,069 --> 00:37:58,778 * * I WAS THERE AT THE BACKSTAGE TRYING * 571 00:37:58,778 --> 00:38:03,683 * BUT THE WORDS THEY NEVER CAM I WAS AVAILABL 572 00:38:03,683 --> 00:38:08,722 FOR A STATEMENT BUT I JUST * * HUNG MY HEAD IN SHAME IT FELT NOTHING TO M 573 00:38:08,722 --> 00:38:13,760 ALL THE CEREMONY I'D WASTED * * AND THEN I' 574 00:38:13,760 --> 00:38:17,797 THANK THEM AND LEAVE AND SAY GOD BLESS YOU AL GOODNIGHT * 575 00:38:17,797 --> 00:38:23,570 * THEN I'D THIN THE GRAVE WAS TURNIN AND THAT NOTHING 576 00:38:23,570 --> 00:38:31,778 WOULD ABSOLVE ME * * MY HAND ON HEART 577 00:38:31,778 --> 00:38:37,817 IT'S NOT A THING THAT I'VE BEEN DREAMING OF * * AND IT GOES WITHOUT 578 00:38:37,817 --> 00:38:40,754 MY BLESSIN AND LEAVES ME IN A RUT BUT IT COMES AND GOES * 579 00:38:40,754 --> 00:38:47,160 * AND FILLS M WHEN I'M EMPTY THEN IT COMES AND SHOWS * 580 00:38:47,160 --> 00:39:00,774 * HOW I NEED YO WHEN YOU'RE GONE * * 581 00:39:00,774 --> 00:39:05,245 * IT QUAKES AND MOVES * * THEN BREAKS 582 00:39:05,245 --> 00:39:09,015 THEN SHATTERS OVER M IN SHAPES OF ALL THESE QUIET SACRED THINGS I NEED * 583 00:39:09,015 --> 00:39:18,658 * * * MY HAND 584 00:39:18,658 --> 00:39:22,829 ON HEART IF THERE'S A LINE OR SOMETHING IN THESE SONGS * 585 00:39:22,829 --> 00:39:26,199 * THAT ARE WORTHY OF SOME MENTIO YOU'RE FREE TO LET ME KNOW 586 00:39:26,199 --> 00:39:33,106 BUT IT COMES AND GOES * * AND HOLDS M IN MY WEAKNESS 587 00:39:33,106 --> 00:39:41,047 AND IT COMES AND GOES * * MY HAND ON HEART 588 00:39:41,047 --> 00:39:44,951 IT'S NOT A THING THA I'VE BEEN DREAMING OF * * AND IT GOES 589 00:39:44,951 --> 00:39:50,290 WITHOUT MY BLESSIN AND LEAVES ME IN A RUT BUT IT COMES AND GOES * 590 00:39:50,290 --> 00:39:56,963 * AND HOLDS M WHEN I'M SLEEPLESS THEN IT COMES AND SHOWS * 591 00:39:56,963 --> 00:40:02,535 * HOW I NEED YO WHEN YOU'RE GONE * * 592 00:40:02,535 --> 00:40:02,569 WHEN YOU'RE GONE * * 593 00:40:04,604 --> 00:40:14,180 * [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE 594 00:40:14,180 --> 00:40:17,283 >> Jimmy: OH THAT'S HOW YOU DO IT RIGHT THERE. 595 00:40:17,283 --> 00:40:20,787 THANK YOU SO MUCH! COME ON. GANG OF YOUTHS 596 00:40:20,787 --> 00:40:24,357 [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE "ANGEL IN REALTIME" IS OUT NOW MY THANKS TO SAM ROCKWELL, 597 00:40:24,357 --> 00:40:26,259 PAMELA ADLON, GAME OF YOUTHS, ONCE AGAIN [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE 598 00:40:26,259 --> 00:40:31,431 WELL DONE. AND THE ROOTS RIGHT THERE FROM PHILADELPHIA, PENNSYLVANIA 599 00:40:31,431 --> 00:40:34,901 THANK YOU FOR WATCHING STAY TUNED FOR "LATE NIGHT WITH SETH MEYERS. 600 00:40:34,901 --> 00:40:34,901 SETH MEYERS. GOODNIGHT, EVERYBODY [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE