>> Steve: FROM STUDIO 6B IN ROCKEFELLER CENTER IN THE HEART
OF NEW YORK CITY, IT'S "THE TONIGHT SHOW STARRING JIMMY FALLON."
TONIGHT, JOIN JIMMY AND HIS GUESTS - COLSON BAKER AKA
MACHINE GUN KELLY, HARRY KANE MUSICAL GUEST, LAINEY WILSON
AND FEATURING THE LEGENDARY ROOTS CREW >> Questlove: 1662
>> Steve: AND NOW, HERE HE IS, JIMMY FALLON
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE
* * [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE
>> Jimmy: OH, WOW! WELCOME! WOW.
THANK YOU SO MUCH. [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE >> Jimmy: I'M SO HAPPY
WELCOME BACK I LOVE IT. THANK YOU.
THANK YOU, EVERYONE. WELCOME TO "THE TONIGHT SHOW." I'M HAPPY YOU'RE HERE.
THANK YOU FOR WATCHING GUYS, I'M VERY EXCITED ABOUT THIS
IT IS "FLEET WEEK" HERE IN NEW YORK CITY. [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE
* YEAH, IT'S THAT SPECIAL TIME OF YEAR WHEN 3,000 MEMBERS OF THE
MILITARY TELL THEIR UBER DRIVER, "THANK YOU FOR YOUR SERVICE.
[ LAUGHTER ] AND THIS IS GREAT. TONIGHT, OUR ENTIRE AUDIENCE IS
FILLED WITH SERVICE MEMBERS OF THE U.S. MILITARY
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE * THAT'S EXA -- LOOKING GOOD
THIS IS A VERY INTERESTING CROWD. YOU'RE THE ONLY PEOPLE WHO
WATCHED TOM CRUISE FLY UPSIDE DOWN AT 1,000 MILES PER HOUR AND GO, "BORING.
[ LAUGHTER ] I REMEMBER TELLING MY DAD I THOUGHT I COULD BE A GOOD
SOLDIER, AND TO THIS DAY, IT'S STILL THE HARDEST I'VE EVER MADE HIM LAUGH
[ LAUGHTER ] BUT THIS IS COOL FOR FLEET WEEK, THE PUBLIC CAN
ACTUALLY TAKE TOURS OF SOME OF THE NAVY SHIPS IN THE HUDSON RIVER.
NEW YORKERS ARE THE ONLY PEOPLE WHO SEE SIX BEDS CRAMMED IN A TINY ROOM AND GO, "OH,
SPACIOUS." [ LAUGHTER ] THAT'S $3,000 A MONTH HERE
[ LAUGHTER ] YEAH YEAH
IT IS FLEET WEEK, AND TONIGHT'S AUDIENCE IS MADE UP OF ACTIVE DUTY SERVICE MEMBERS FROM THE
ARMY [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE THE NAVY
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE THE AIR FORCE. [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE
MARINES. [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE AND COAST GUARD.
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE WE ARE SO GRATEFUL FOR YOUR SERVICE.
WE CAN'T THANK YOU ENOUGH. I'M SORRY, SIR, DO YOU HAVE A QUESTION
>> YEAH, YOU FORGOT ABOUT ONE OF THE BRANCHES. >> Jimmy: I DID?
>> YEAH, YOU FORGOT TO MENTION SPACE FORCE. [ LAUGHTER ]
>> Jimmy: OH, RIGHT. ARE -- ARE YOU WITH THEM >> YEP
>> Jimmy: WELL, I'M SORRY. THANK YOU FOR YOUR SERVICE >> OH, YOU DON'T HAVE TO THANK
US WE HAVEN'T DONE ANYTHING YET [ LAUGHTER ]
>> Jimmy: WHAT -- WHAT HAVE YOU BEEN DOING >> MOSTLY SETTING UP OUR
OFFICE, DOING LOTS OF STAPLES RUNS, SETTING UP PRINTERS, BUYING NOTEPADS.
YOU KNOW, THAT KIND OF STUFF OH, AND ZOOM SO MANY ZOOM CALLS
[ LAUGHTER ] >> Jimmy: WHO ARE YOU ZOOMING WITH
>> LIKE, OTHER PEOPLE IN THE SPACE FORCE. [ LAUGHTER ]
>> Jimmy: WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? >> LIKE, WHAT TO DO IF SOMEONE
ATTACKED US FROM SPACE AND THEN WHAT WE'RE GOING TO GET AT CHIPOTLE
>> Jimmy: YEAH [ LAUGHTER ] GOT IT
AND JUST OUT OF CURIOSITY, WHAT WOULD YOU DO IF SOMEONE DID
ATTACK US FROM SPACE >> I'D CALL IN THE EXPERTS >> Jimmy: LIKE THE TOP PEOPLE
IN SPACE FORCE >> NO WAY. I'D CALL THE ARMY, THE NAVY,
THE AIR FORCE, THE MARINES, THE COAST GUARD. [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE
>> Jimmy: SMART MAN. GIVE IT UP FOR THE SPACE FORCE, EVERYBODY.
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE SPACE FORCE. >> Jimmy: GUYS, LET'S -- LET'S
GET TO SOME NEWS HERE. TODAY, A CARNIVAL CRUISE SHIP WAS VISITING TURKS AND CAICOS
WHEN IT CAUGHT ON FIRE ON THE PLUS SIDE, FOR THE FIRST TIME EVER, THE SHIP IS
STERILIZED [ LAUGHTER ] YEAH, USUALLY WHEN YOU FEEL
A BURNING SENSATION ON A A CRUISE, IT'S RIGHT AFTER YOU SPEND AN HOUR WITH A STRANGER
IN THE HOT TUB [ LAUGHTER ] SWITCHING GEARS.
TODAY, DISNEY RELEASED A FIRST LOOK AT "INDIANA JONES 5" STARRING HARRISON FORD
CHECK THIS OUT >> Jimmy: YEAH, "INDIANA JONES 5.
ALTHOUGH, BASED ON THE PHOTO, IT LOOKS MORE LIKE THE SEQUEL TO "HAMILTON."
[ LAUGHTER ] OF COURSE, YOU CAN TELL INDIANA JONES IS GETTING OLDER,
BECAUSE BEFORE CRACKING HIS WHIP, HE HAS TO TAKE A PILL. [ LAUGHTER ]
SOME MORE ENTERTAINMENT NEWS GUYS, TOMORROW THE NEW "STAR WARS" SERIES, "OBI-WAN KENOBI"
DROPS ON DISNEY PLUS I AM PRETTY PUMPED [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE
I'M EXCITED ABOUT THIS TARIQ, YOU EXCITED >> Tariq: I GUESS, SURE.
OBI-WAN KENOBI'S OKAY. >> Jimmy: OH, YOU'RE NOT -- NOT REALLY A "STAR WARS" FAN
>> Tariq: NO, I LOVE "STAR WARS." WHAT I'M SAYING, IS THAT THERE
ARE OTHER MEMBERS OF OBI-WAN KENOBI'S FAMILY THAT I'D PROBABLY RATHER WATCH
A SHOW ABOUT >> Jimmy: OTHER MEMBERS OF HIS FAMILY
LIKE -- LIKE WHO >> Tariq: LIKE -- WELL, YOU KNOW, I DID SOME DIGGING ON
WOOKIEEPEDIA [ LAUGHTER ] AND HE'S GOT LOTS OF COOL
RELATIVES. LIKE HIS BROTHERS, THE OPIE-WAN KENOBI AND
TOBY WAN MAGUIRE [ LAUGHTER ] AND THEN THERE'S -- THERE'S HIS
SISTERS, THE OBI-WANDA-SYKES AND OPRAH- WAN-KENOFREY. [ LAUGHTER ]
>> Jimmy: OPRAH-WAN-KENOFREY INTERESTING, I'VE NEVER -- I'VE NEVER HEARD OF THOSE
>> Tariq: YEAH, YEAH WELL, THEN THERE ARE HIS COUSINS, ABRA-WAN-CADABRA.
>> Jimmy: UH-HUH [ LAUGHTER ] >> Tariq: OBA-BARBARA-ANN.
[ LAUGHTER ] >> Jimmy: UH-HUH [ LAUGHTER ]
>> Tariq: ABBA-MAMMA-MIA [ LAUGHTER ] AND O-BOLOGNA-BURRITO.
>> Jimmy: OKAY [ LAUGHTER ] >> Tariq: OH, THEN -- THEN YOU
GOT THE TWINS, YABBA-DABBA AND SCOOBY- DOOBY-DOO. [ LAUGHTER ]
AND THEN -- THEN THERE'S O-BEE-BOP-AND-ROCKSTEADY [ LAUGHTER ]
THE -- THE O-BABY-BOSS-BUMS-A-BABA. >> Jimmy: OKAY, OKAY
YOU OKAY, BUD? >> Tariq: OH, THERE'S ALSO - [ LAUGHTER ]
O-BARACK-OBAMA-IN-DA-BAHAMAS-WEA [ LAUGHTER ] >> Jimmy: OH, YEAH
>> Tariq: AND, OF COURSE, O-BAWITDABA-DA-BANG-DA-BANG-DIGG TO-THE-BOOGIE-SAID-UP-JUMP-THE-K
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE >> Jimmy: IS THAT IT >> Tariq: I'M JUST KIDDING
I'VE NEVER SEEN "STAR WARS." [ LAUGHTER ] >> Jimmy: ALL RIGHT,
TARIQ TROTTER, EVERYONE. TARIQ TROTTER. [ RIM SHOT ]
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE WELL, GUYS, LISTEN TO THIS A RECENT STUDY FOUND THAT MEN
WHO POST SHIRTLESS PHOTOS ON DATING APPS ARE VIEWED AS LESS COMPETENT AND MORE PROMISCUOUS
[ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] I LIKE THE IDEA OF PEOPLE LOOKING AT DATING PROFILES
LIKE, "WELL, HE MUST BE COMPETENT. HE HAS A SHIRT."
[ LAUGHTER ] WELL, GET THIS, A NEW POLL FOUND THAT TRADER JOE'S IS THE
MOST REPUTABLE BRAND IN THE COUNTRY. YEAH, AT TRADER JOE'S, YOU KNOW
EXACTLY WHAT YOU'RE GOING TO GET. HUMMUS FROM A WHITE GUY IN
DREADLOCKS [ LAUGHTER ] I LOVE TRADER JOE'S.
IT'S LIKE WHOLE FOODS IF IT TOOK A GAP YEAR TO TRAVEL BEFORE COLLEGE
[ LAUGHTER ] WELL, GUYS, I'VE ALWAYS SAID THAT THE BEST ADVICE COMES FROM
KIDS SO, WITH THAT IN MIND, IT'S TIME FOR "KID ADVICE."
HERE WE GO
* KID ADVIC ADVICE *
>> Jimmy: BUT FIRST, I'M GOING TO NEED SOMEONE TO HELP ME HIS CHILDREN'S BOOK, "THE ONE
AND ONLY SPARKELLA MAKES A A PLAN," IS OUT MAY 31st PLEASE WELCOME, CHANNING TATUM,
LADIES AND GENTLEMEN [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE *
THAT'S MY MAN. HEY! GOOD TO SEE YOU, BUDDY
CHANNING >> YES, SIR? >> Jimmy: CHANNING, WE ASKED
OUR VIEWERS AT HOME TO SEND IN SOME ADVICE THAT THEIR KIDS HAD.
WE GOT SO MANY AMAZING RESPONSES. AND I THOUGHT THAT MAYBE WE
COULD READ SOME OF OUR FAVORITES RIGHT NOW. DOES THAT SOUND OKAY TO YOU?
>> PLEASE. >> Jimmy: ALL RIGHT, GREAT >> ABSOLUTELY.
>> Jimmy: ALL RIGHT, HERE WE GO I WILL START
"DON'T HOWL AT THE WOLFS AT THE ZOO. YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND WHAT
YOU'RE SAYING BACK TO THEM, AND YOU MAY BE SWEARING AT THEM! SARA, 8-YEARS-OLD.
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE THAT'S TRUE. CHANNING, YOUR TURN.
>> "IF ALL OF YOUR FRIENDS WANT PLAY SIMON SAYS, BUT YOU WANT TO PLAY HIDE 'N SEEK, JUST SAY,
'SIMON SAYS, PLAY HIDE 'N SEEK.' WALLY, 3
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE >> Jimmy: YEAH, THAT'S ACTUALLY -- THAT'S ACTUALLY
GOOD ADVICE. 3-YEARS-OLD. HOW ABOUT THIS ONE
"YOU MUST SHARE YOUR TOYS EVEN IF YOU DON'T WANT TO AND REMEMBER, SHARON IS KAREN.
[ LAUGHTER ] OWEN, 5-YEARS-OLD. >> "IF YOU -- IF YOU DON'T KNOW
SOMETHING, JUST USE WHAT YOU HAVE THAT'S ALL YOU NEED.
EVERYTHING AROUND YOU CAN HELP YOU. AND IF YOU DON'T HAVE WHAT YOU
NEED, JUST USE THE NATURE. IT'S SO GOOD LOVE YOU
AND I LOVE DINOSAURS." EOGHAN, 5-YEARS-OLD. [ LAUGHTER ]
>> Jimmy: WOW. [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE [ LAUGHTER ]
THAT'S A LONG ONE. ALL RIGHT. I GOT -- HERE THIS ONE'S GOOD.
"WHEN LIFE GIVES YOU CAKE, STICK YOUR FACE IN IT. [ LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE
SOPHIE, 8 YEAR -- THAT'S FANTASTIC. >> I'M DOWN WITH SOPHIE.
"IF YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO WORK AND WANT TO STAY HOME THE WHOLE DAY, JUST GET FIRED.
JULIETTE, 4-YEARS-OLD. [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE >> Jimmy: THAT'S ACTUALLY --
THIS IS GREAT ADVICE HOW ABOUT THIS ONE "BE FRIENDS AND BE HAPPY AND
DON'T BE MEAN TO NO ONE AND BE AND SIT NEXT TO EACH OTHER, AND BE NICE, AND DON'T HIT EACH
OTHER, AND DON'T PUNCH YOU IN THE EYE. KYLIE, 4-YEARS-OLD
[ LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE OUR FINAL ONE. YOU WANT TO BRING US HOME,
CHANNING GIVE US THE FINAL PIECE OF ADVICE
>> "INHALE OUTHALE. SIMEON, 4-YEARS-OLD.
[ LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE >> Jimmy: "INHALE, OUTHALE." THANK YOU TO ALL OUR KIDS.
THANK YOU TO CHANNING TATUM. MY MAN *
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE HIS NEW CHILDREN'S BOOK, "THE ONE AND ONLY SPARKELLA MAKES A
A PLAN" IS AVAILABLE MAY 31st. THANK YOU FOR DOING THAT, CHANNING
I APPRECIATE IT, BUDDY [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE >> THANK YOU, GUYS
>> Jimmy: AND FINALLY, THIS IS EXCITING "STRANGER THINGS" SEASON
4 COMES OUT ON NETFLIX THIS FRIDAY NOW, IT'S BEEN ALMOST THREE
YEARS SINCE THE LAST SEASON, SO I GOT TOGETHER WITH SOME FRIENDS TO HELP CATCH EVERYONE
UP ON EVERYTHING THAT'S HAPPENED IN SEASONS ONE THROUGH THREE.
CHECK THIS OUT
* >> Jimmy: "STRANGER THINGS"
RECAP. LET'S GO *
*
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE >> Jimmy: WE HAVE A GREAT SHOW
COLSON BAKER, AKA MACHINE GUN KELLY, IS HERE TONIGHT.
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE PLUS, MY FAVORITE SOCCER SUPERSTAR, HARRY KANE IS ON THE
SHOW AND WE'VE GOT GREAT MUSIC TONIGHT FROM LAINEY WILSON
STICK AROUND WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK WITH COLSON BAKER
COME ON BACK [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE *
>> IT'S LIKE MY BIRTHDAY LAST MONTH, AND HE TEXTS ME HE'S LIKE, "HEY, I'M ABOUT TO
COME TO YOUR PARTY CAN I BRING A PLUS ONE?" AND I WAS LIKE, "YEAH, OF
COURSE." AND HE PULLS UP, AND HIS PLUS ONE IS ROBERT PATTINSON.
>> Jimmy: OH WELCOME BACK, EVERYONE AS I MENTIONED BEFORE IF YOU'RE
JUST TUNING IN, IT IS FLEET WEEK HERE IN NEW YORK CITY AND TONIGHT OUR ENTIRE AUDIENCE
IS MADE UP OF SERVICE MEMBERS FROM THE ARMY, NAVY, AIR FORCE, MARINES, AND U.S. COAST GUARD!
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE WE ALWAYS LOVE HAVING YOU HERE THANK YOU FOR ALL YOUR SERVICE
THANK YOU FOR ALL YOU DO PROTECTING OUR COUNTRY HERE AND ABROAD
IT IS AN HONOR TO HAVE YOU BACK WITH US TONIGHT. WE'RE GOING TO HAVE A GOOD TIME
TONIGHT. WELCOME. [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE
WE HAVE A GREAT SHOW WE HAVE A GREAT SHOW HE'S A SOCCER SUPERSTAR, AN
UBER STAR, IF YOU CAN SAY THAT HE'S THE CAPTAIN OF ENGLAND'S NATIONAL TEAM, WHICH WILL BE
COMPETING IN THE WORLD CUP HARRY KANE IS HERE TONIGHT [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE
THE BEST AND WE HAVE GREAT MUSIC. SHE WAS NAMED THE ACADEMY OF
COUNTRY MUSIC'S NEW FEMALE ARTIST OF THE YEAR LAINEY WILSON IS PERFORMING.
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE BUT FIRST, HE IS A A MULTIPLATINUM RECORDING
ARTIST WHOSE LATEST ALBUM "MAINSTREAM SELLOUT" IS OUT NOW.
HE ALSO WROTE, DIRECTED, AND STARS IN A NEW MOVIE CALLED "GOOD MOURNING" WHICH IS IN
SELECT THEATERS AND ON DEMAND NOW. EVERYONE PLEASE WELCOME
COLSON BAKER, AKA, MACHINE GUN KELLY.
WELCOME BACK
>> THANK YOU, THANK YOU. >> Jimmy: THANK YOU FOR BEING HERE
HOW GREAT DOES THAT LOOK WHEN YOU COME OUT AND SEE ALL THE - >> HOT
>> Jimmy: YEAH, HOT. THAT'S EXACTLY RIGHT EXACTLY RIGHT.
WE HAVE A LOT TO TALK ABOUT. SINCE I LAST SAW YOU, YOU GOT ENGAGED TO THE LOVELY
MEGAN FOX. CONGRATULATIONS. [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE
SHE'S GREAT. >> YEAH. >> Jimmy: CONGRATULATIONS.
>> IT'S GREAT. >> Jimmy: ALSO, YOUR LATEST ALBUM, "MAINSTREAM SELLOUT"
CAME OUT IN MARCH AND WENT RIGHT TO NUMBER ONE. [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE
NOT TOO SHABBY, BUD. >> THANK YOU >> Jimmy: NUMBER ONE, NOT TOO
SHABBY >> YEAH. >> Jimmy: AND ON JUNE 8th,
YOU'RE GOING TO KICK OFF A A GLOBAL TOUR. GLOBAL
THIS IS YOUR FIRST BIG ARENA TOUR VENUES ARE SOLD OUT IN A DAY BY
THE WAY. DUDE, YOU COULDN'T BE HOTTER RIGHT NOW.
>> YOU'RE STROKING MY EGO. >> Jimmy: SORRY ABOUT THAT I APOLOGIZE.
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE CONGRATS ON "GOOD MOURNING." IT'S IN SELECT THEATERS AND ON
DEMAND NOW MOURNING, BY THE WAY, IS SPELLED M-O-U-R.
>> YES >> Jimmy: AND -- YEAH, "GOOD MOURNING" --
IT'S A COMEDY THAT YOU WROTE BASED ON A TEXT YOU GOT FROM A A GIRLFRIEND
>> FROM MEGAN. >> Jimmy: FROM MEGAN >> YES
>> Jimmy: OH >> I'M A ONE-WOMAN MAN >> Jimmy: OF COURSE YOU ARE,
YEAH SO, YOU GOT A TEXT FROM MEGAN AND SO IT JUST -- WHAT
HAPPENED YOU SPIRALLED OUT? >> YEAH, IT'S LIKE -- IT
STARTED WITH, LIKE, MEGAN'S JUST VERY IN NATURE. SHE'S LIKE -- THAT'S WHERE HER
HEAD'S ALWAYS AT THE TEXT -- IT WAS THIS LONG PARAGRAPH THAT STARTED WITH,
LIKE, "A RAVEN CAME AND SAT NEXT TO ME IN A TREE." AND THEN, YOU KNOW, IT WAS ALL
THIS STUFF AND THEN SHE GOT ON A PLANE AND WENT TO EUROPE AND DIDN'T TAKE
HER PHONE. AND I WAS JUST LIKE, "WHAT IS THAT?"
LIKE, YOU CAN'T LEAVE ME WITH THIS AND IT WAS RIGHT WHEN I WAS --
WE WERE STARTING TO, LIKE, BE SERIOUS. AND -- I JUST LIKE TOOK THE
MESSAGE TO ALL MY FRIENDS WHO AREN'T IN RELATIONSHIPS FOR RELATIONSHIP ADVICE.
SO THEY WERE, LIKE, GREAT. AND THEY WERE LIKE, "THAT'S NOT GOOD, DUDE."
[ LAUGHTER ] AND NOW AFTER DOING ALL THIS PRESS FOR THE MOVIE, I'M
LIKE - "WHY DID I WRITE --" LIKE, INSTEAD OF JUST WAITING
TO TALK ABOUT IT, I LIKE, GOT MANIC AND WROTE A WHOLE MOVIE AND, LIKE, GOT ALL THIS CAST
INVOLVED AND, LIKE, SPENT STUDIOS MONEY. AND I'M JUST LIKE, I SHOULD
HAVE JUST WAITED A WEEK AND TALKED, BUT -- >> immy: YEAH, AND TALKED TO
HER, YEAH. BUT IT TURNED OUT WITH A GREAT PRODUCT.
>> YEAH. >> Jimmy: WHEN YOU DO THESE MOVIES, IT'S A BIG DEAL.
YOU ALSO PLAY IF IN FRONT OF AUDIENCES LIKE TEST AUDIENCES. AND YOU WERE TELLING ME THERE'S
A COUPLE THINGS THAT GOT CUT FROM THIS MOVIE THAT WERE HIGH BUDGET
>> YEAH. >> Jimmy: SCENES BIG BUDGET STUFF
I MEAN, LIKE -- YEAH WHAT WERE THEY, LIKE, CGI? >> NO, NO.
WE WERE LIKE, LET'S JUST GO REAL SO, WE HAD A $50,000 LOBSTER -
[ LAUGHTER ] WE SPENT $50,000 BETWEEN THIS LOBSTER AND AN ELECTRIC EEL.
>> Jimmy: YOU SPENT $50,000 ON THIS LOBSTER PUPPET? [ LAUGHTER ]
>> IS THERE A PICTURE OF THE EEL? IT'S WHAT -- YEAH.
BUT IT MIGHT HAVE GONE TO THE LED LIGHTS THAT ARE PUT IN THIS -- NONE OF WHICH, EITHER
OF THESE MAKE AN APPEARANCE IN THE MOVIE. THEY ALL GOT CUT BECAUSE WE,
LIKE, SCREENED IT AND THEY HAVE A 15-MINUTE SECTION. BECAUSE WE THOUGHT IT WAS SO
FUNNY. WE WERE LIKE, "OH, THIS LOBSTER SECTION IS GOING TO CRUSH.
AND IT DID THE OPPOSITE. EVERYONE LEFT WITH -- THE ONLY NOTE PRETTY MUCH FOR THE WHOLE
SCREEN WAS LIKE, "GREAT, LAUGHED MY ASS OFF WHY WAS THERE THIS LOBSTER
SCENE THAT WAS 15 MINUTES? LIKE, WHAT - I HATED IT."
>> Jimmy: WHERE IS THE PUPPET NOW? >> WE DON'T KNOW
YOU KNOW WHAT? WE PROBABLY NEED OUR MONEY BACK
IT'S LIKE -- I FEEL LIKE I'VE SEEN FIVE OF THESE BACKSTAGE IN YOUR SHOW.
>> Jimmy: YEAH, WE MAKE THEM WE DON'T HAVE $50,000 LOBSTER PUPPETS.
>> IT WAS FOR A PUPPETEER COSTS, TOO >> Jimmy: WOW, SERIOUS
>> CAUSE I WAS -- WE WERE SUPER METICULOUS, LIKE, "WE NEED HIS CLAWS TO MOVE.
WE NEED ITS MOUTH TO MOVE. WE GAVE IT ABS." [ LAUGHTER ]
ABS. >> Jimmy: I MEAN -- IT'S GETTING IT'S PLAY TONIGHT.
>> THERE WE GO THAT'S ALMOST KIND OF WORTH IT >> Jimmy: YOUR CHARACTER IS
TRYING TO GET AN AUDITION FOR THE ROLE OF BATMAN IN THIS MOVIE.
>> YES >> Jimmy: DID YOU KNOW THAT "THE BATMAN" WAS COMING OUT
WHEN YOU WERE WRITING THIS >> NO. NO
IT WAS JUST, LIKE, VERY SERENDIPITOUS. IT JUST WORKED OUT LIKE THAT
IT'S A CRAZY STORY, BECAUSE BATMAN -- BATMAN AND THE ENTITY, JUST KEPT POPPING UP
BECAUSE, YOU KNOW, THE -- BATMAN CAME OUT A MONTH BEFORE THIS MOVIE CAME OUT.
AND WE WERE LIKE, "OH, MY GOD, THAT'S GREAT THIS IS CRAZY.
AND ALSO A MONTH AGO I WAS HAVING MY BIRTHDAY PARTY, AND YOU KNOW, THERE WAS THIS ONE
EASTER WHERE I WAS LIKE, "HEY, PETE, YOU'VE GOT TO COME YOU KNOW, LET'S GO TO MY
FRIEND'S HOUSE FOR EASTER. AND HE PULLED UP AND HE HAD 40s AND HE WAS LIKE, "LET'S DO THIS
THING. AND WE WENT AND IT WAS SANDRA BULLOCK'S HOUSE
AND, LIKE, WE WALKED IN THERE. IT'S LIKE, JENN ANNISTON AND ALL THESE, LIKE --
AND PETE WAS LIKE, "WHY WOULD YOU DO THIS TO ME? WE LOOK SO STUPID.
LIKE, WE'VE HAD 40 OUNCES AND WE'RE AT SANDRA BULLOCK'S. LIKE, WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME
THIS IS WHERE WE'RE GOING? >> Jimmy: AMERICA'S SWEETHEART >> AND SO, THEN WE -- IT'S LIKE
MY BIRTHDAY LAST MONTH AND HE TEXTS ME. HE'S LIKE, "HEY, I'M ABOUT TO
COME TO YOUR PARTY CAN I BRING A PLUS ONE." AND I WAS LIKE, "YEAH, OF
COURSE." AND HE PULLS UP AND HIS PLUS ONE IS ROBERT PATTINSON.
AND I WAS LIKE, "YOU BROUGHT BATMAN?" [ LAUGHTER ]
>> Jimmy: SURPRISE >> YEAH, IT'S SO FUNNY LIKE, EVERYONE JUST KEPT COMING
UP LIKE, DUDE, IS BATMAN AT YOUR BIRTHDAY? IT'S FUNNY WHEN YOU BECOME
BATMAN BECAUSE NO ONE REFERS TO YOU ANYMORE AS YOUR ACTUAL NAME
YOU'RE JUST BATMAN >> Jimmy: YEAH, FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE, YOU'RE BATMAN
>> YOU'RE BATMAN >> Jimmy: YEAH DID YOU KNOW ROBERT BEFORE
>> YEAH, LET'S SEE - I WAS LIKE, AGAIN, LIKE ALWAYS JUST OUT, SEEING HIM AND STUFF
LIKE THAT. BUT THIS WAS A -- IT'S JUST -- BUT NOW HE'S BATMAN.
SO, I'M JUST LIKE, "WHAT UP, DUDE I KNOW WE KNOW EACH OTHER, BUT
YOU'RE KIND OF BATMAN, NOW." >> Jimmy: YEAH, YOU'RE BATMAN NOW.
YEAH CAN WE SET UP THIS FILM FOR ANYONE THAT WANTS TO KNOW MORE
ABOUT THE FILM >> NO. I'M JUST KIDDING
NO, I'M JUST KIDDING NO ONE GO SEE IT >> Jimmy: IT'S A COMEDY.
IT'S A COMEDY. >> IT'S A COMEDY IT KIND OF JUST GOES BACK TO
THE CLASSIC DAYS OF, LIKE, GAG HUMOR AND LIKE, JUST, YOU KNOW, $50,000 LOBSTER PUPPETS THAT WE
THOUGHT WERE GOING TO CRUSH. THE CAST IS ODDLY GREAT. THE BUDGET IS THIS BIG AND THE
CAST IS THIS BIG SO IT'S -- >> Jimmy: SNOOP DOGG IS THE
VOICE OF A TALKING JOINT >> YES >> Jimmy: YEAH
[ LAUGHTER ] >> YEAH. >> Jimmy: NOT TOO SHABBY
I MEAN, YOU KIND OF HIT A HOME RUN THERE. [ APPLAUSE ]
HIT A HOME RUN RIGHT THERE THAT'S ALL YOU NEED. THAT'S ALL YOU REALLY NEEDED TO
SAY. I WANT TO SHOW A CLIP. HERE'S COLSON BAKER IN "GOOD
MOURNING." TAKE A LOOK AT THIS.
WHAT THE [ BLEEP ] DID YOU JUST
DO >> LONDON, WHAT IS THIS DUST >> THAT'S NOT DUST
THAT'S PEOPLE, MAN >> HOMMIE, DID YOU JUST BRING THE DEAD GRANDMA VASE?
>> OH. WE CAN FIX THIS. I THINK THAT WAS ACTUALLY THE
COUSIN THAT NO ONE REALLY LIKES. SO -- WE'VE GOT TO PICK HIM UP
>> WOAH, I'M NOT [ BLEEP ] REMAINS, MAN >> DUDE, LEO, YOU DID IT
>> IT'S ALL GOOD IT'S ALL GOOD. AT LEAST IT WAS JUST ONE OF
THEM I MEAN, IT DOESN'T EVEN LOOK THAT BAD, GUYS
[ GLASS SHATTERING ] [ APPLAUSE ] >> Jimmy: THAT'S EXACTLY RIGHT
COLSON BAKER, AKA MACHINE GUN KELLY, EVERYBODY "GOOD MOURNING" IS IN SELECT
THEATERS AND ON DEMAND NOW CATCH HIM ON TOUR THIS SUMMER. COLSON AND I ARE PERFORMING MAD
LIB THEATER WHEN WE COME BACK. STICK AROUND, EVERYBODY. [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE
* >> Jimmy: WELCOME BACK I'M HANGING OUT WITH
COLSON BAKER, AKA, MACHINE GUN KELLY. [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE
HIS NEW MOVIE "GOOD MOURNING" IS IN THEATERS AND ON DEMAND NOW.
AND HIS ALBUM "MAINSTREAM SELLOUT" IS ALSO OUT NOW COLSON, I WANTED TO TRY
SOMETHING FUN WITH YOU I THOUGHT WE COULD ACT OUT A A DRAMATIC SCENE TOGETHER,
OKAY BUT FIRST WE HAVE TO FILL IN THE BLANKS
IT IS TIME FOR "MAD LIBS THEATER. HERE WE GO
[ APPLAUSE ] * * MAD LIBS THEATRE *
>> Jimmy: ALL RIGHT. SO HERE'S HOW THIS WORKS I'M GONNA ASK YOU FOR SOME
SILLY WORDS, NOUNS, VERBS, ADJECTIVES, ET CETERA, AND THEY'LL ALL BE WRITTEN ONTO OUR
CUE CARDS HERE, AS WE'RE DOING THIS AND THEN WE'RE GONNA ACT OUT A
A DRAMATIC MAD LIBS SCENE. ARE YOU READY FOR THIS >> THANK GOD I WENT TO THE
FOURTH GRADE [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] >> Jimmy: OKAY, HERE WE GO
I WANT A NOUN -- >> NOUNS, ADJECTIVES - >> Jimmy: YES.
I WANT A NOUN THAT BEGINS WITH A C. >> KOALA
[ LAUGHTER ] WAIT, NO >> COMPUTER.
COMPUTER >> Jimmy: COMPUTER, GOOD COMPUTER'S GOOD.
[ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] ADJECTIVE. >> STINKY.
>> Jimmy: TYPE OF BUG. >> CATERPILLAR >> Jimmy: ANIMAL
>> KOALA KOALA! >> Jimmy: KOALA!
>> Jimmy: KOALA, OKAY, GOOD. YEAH, GOOD [ LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE
THEY GOT YOUR BACK THEY GOT YOUR BACK A CHAIN RESTAURANT
>> CHIPOTLE, I USED TO WORK THERE. >> Jimmy: CHIPOTLE
>> YEAH. >> Jimmy: NOUN >> BABY!
[ LAUGHTER ] >> Jimmy: OKAY, BABY, OKAY >> BABY.
>> Jimmy: A KITCHEN APPLIANCE. >> SPATULA [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ]
>> Jimmy: I LOVE THAT, YOU'RE -- YOU'RE SO CONFIDENT ON SPATULA
[ INDISCERNIBLE THAT WAS THE ONE, YOU'RE LIKE, "OH, NO, NO, YEAH.
SPATULA, OF COURSE." SPATULA. A PLURAL NOUN.
[ LAUGHTER ] >> FUNGI [ LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE
RIGHT? >> Jimmy: WOW. THAT'S NEXT LEVEL.
THAT'S NEXT -- THAT'S NEXT LEVEL. FUNGI.
UH, ANOTHER ANIMAL >> PLATYPUS. [ LAUGHTER ]
>> Jimmy: PLATYPUS ONE OF THE SEVEN DWARVES >> OH, I NEVER WATCHED THAT
MOVIE. >> SLEEPY! >> SMOKEY?
WHAT SMOKEY [ LAUGHTER ]
WHAT >> Jimmy: SMOKEY >> SLEEPY, SLEEPY!
>> Jimmy: NO, NO, I'M WRITING DOWN SMOKEY, BECAUSE - [ LAUGHTER ]
CELEBRITY NAME [ INDISCERNIBLE AUDIENCE SUGGESTIONS
>> UH, UH, BENEDICT CUMBERBATCH [ LAUGHTER ]
>> Jimmy: BENEDICT CUMBERBATCH [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] NAME ME A NUMBER
>> JUST "ELEVEN -- ELEVEN -- >> Jimmy: "ELEVEN TOUSAND. >> "-- TOUSAND" WITH WITH
A T-O-U. 11,000 >> Jimmy: 11,000
TYPE OF PROFESSION >> GENIE [ LAUGHTER ]
>> Jimmy: OKAY, SPEED ROUND, HERE WE GO ANOTHER PLURAL NOUN.
>> MOOSE >> MOOSE MOOSES
[ LAUGHTER ] >> Jimmy: WHAT MOOSE.
WHAT IS GOING ON [ LAUGHTER ] UH, OKAY
BODY PART. WATCH IT [ LAUGHTER ]
>> YEAH. ELBOW. >> ELBOW
>> ELBOW, GOOD >> Jimmy: WHAT WOW.
THAT WAS WEIRD [ APPLAUSE ] PHRASE THAT YOU WOULD SAY IF
YOU BUMPED INTO LEONARDO DiCAPRIO ON THE STREET
[ INDISCERNIBLE AUDIENCE SUGGESTIONS >> "YOU -- WHY DID YOU LET GO,
JACK, YOU SHOULD HAVE STAYED ON THE DOOR YOU SHOULD'VE GOT ON THE DOOR.
[ LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE >> Jimmy: "WHY DID YOU LET GOM JACK --"
>> "THERE WAS ROOM FOR YOU ON THE DOOR." >> Jimmy: ALL RIGHT, "WHY DID
YOU LET GO, JACK?" [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] ANOTHER NOUN
>> YOU DO THIS ONE >> Jimmy: BURRITO? >> BURRITO
>> Jimmy: TYPE OF DRINK. >> BLOODY MARY >> Jimmy: BLOODY MARY.
ANOTHER CELEBRITY. >> WAKA FLOCKA FLAME [ LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE
>> Jimmy: FLOCKA FLAME VERB ENDING IN I-N-G >> CLENCHING
>> Jimmy: CLENCHING? [ LAUGHTER ] >> I'M -- I'M SORRY.
I'M SORRY, I'M SORRY, I'M SORRY. >> Jimmy: THIS IS FUN DOING
MAD LIBS WITH YOU. WHAT YOU'D SHOUT IF YOU SAT DOWN IN A SEAT THAT'S WET.
>> "AH." [ LAUGHTER ] >> Jimmy: A HIGH PITCHED "AH"?
>> "AH." >> Jimmy: "AH. FIRST CONCERT YOU EVER
ATTENDED >> OH, BACKSTREET BOYS WHAT'S UP
[ CHEERS ] >> Jimmy: WOW. [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE
BACKSTREET BOYS. A PROFESSIONAL ATHLETE >> TOM BRADY
>> TIGER WOODS >> TOM -- TOM BRADY. >> Jimmy: ALL RIGHT, TOM BRADY
TOM BRADY. ANOTHER VERB ENDING IN I-N-G >> CRYING.
>> Jimmy: CRYING YES, GOOD, CRYING. TWO WORDS THAT RHYME
>> GARAGE, MINAJ [ LAUGHTER ] >> Jimmy: WOW.
GARAGE, MINAJ. A LONG, SILLY WORD [ INDISCERNIBLE AUDIENCE SUGGEST
>> WHAT? [ LAUGHTER ] >> Jimmy: A DISEASE?
>> YEAH, WHAT IS THAT? >> Jimmy: "IRI-DOPTA--"? "DACLI --" I'M HAPPY THE
EDIBLES ARE KICKING IN THIS IS A -- [ LAUGHTER ]
"IRIDOCYCLITIS." >> YEAH, WE -- >> Jimmy: IRIDOCY -- YEAH, OF
COURSE ALL RIGHT, NOW, WE FILLED OUT THE WORDS FOR OUR SCENE.
GOOD LUCK TO OUR CUE CARD. [ LAUGHTER ] SO SORRY, ROMAN.
ARE YOU READY TO PERFORM OUR SCENE? >> I DON'T KNOW NOW.
[ LAUGHTER ] >> Jimmy: LET'S GO, LET'S DO THIS
>> OKAY. >> Jimmy: HERE WE GO [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE
>> AM I GREEN? >> Jimmy: NO, YEAH, YOU'RE
GREEN. YOU'RE GREEN, I'M RED. COMPUTER MAN
WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE? >> OH, HELLO CAPTAIN STINKY. >> Jimmy: PLEASE CALL ME BY MY
NICKNAME, MR. CATERPILLAR. [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] >> I'M HERE FOR THE SAME REASON
YOU'RE HERE, TO RESCUE THE KOALA STUCK ON THE ROOF OF THIS CHIPOTLE
[ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] >> Jimmy: I KNEW THERE WAS TROUBLE TONIGHT WHEN I SAW MY
SIGNAL IN THE SKY. A LIGHT PROJECTED IN THE SHAPE OF A BABY.
[ LAUGHTER ] >> WELL, USING OUR POWER, THIS RESCUE SHOULD BE SIMPLE.
I'M FASTER THAN A SPEEDING SPATULA, AND EVERYTHING I TOUCH TURNS TO FUNGI
[ LAUGHTER ] >> Jimmy: IMPRESSIVE I HAVE THE AGILITY OF
A PLATYPUS AND WHEN I GET REALLY SMOKEY, I TURN INTO BENEDICT CUMBERBATCH
[ LAUGHTER ] >> WOW I MUST TELL YOU, MY BACK STORY
IS COMPLICATED WHEN I WAS "ELEVEN TOUSAND" YEARS OLD, I WAS -
[ LAUGHTER ] I WAS ONCE BITTEN BY A GENIE [ LAUGHTER ]
AND EVER SINCE, I'VE BEEN ABLE TO EMANATE MOOSES FROM MY ELBOW.
[ LAUGHTER ] >> I KNOW. IT'S AMAZING, BUT WITH GREAT
POWER COMES GREAT BURRITO. [ LAUGHTER ] >> Jimmy: YOUR STORY REMINDS ME
OF MY OWN. I BECAME A SUPERHERO AFTER I FELL INTO A TUB OF RADIOACTIVE
BLOODY MARY. [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] BUT LISTEN, WE MUST COMPLETE
THIS RESCUE, BECAUSE THERE'S SOMETHING YOU DON'T KNOW IN THE TRAPPED KOALA'S COLLAR,
THERE'S A USB DRIVE THAT CONTAINS IMAGES OF WAKA FLOCKA FLAME CLENCHING --
[ LAUGHTER ] -- CLENCHING HIS - >> AH.
[ LAUGHTER ] >> Jimmy: NO, NO, HIS FIST, HIS FIST, HIS FIST
>> YEAH, YEAH. AS A WARNING, I DO HAVE ONE WEAKNESS
>> Jimmy: WHAT IS IT >> BACKSTREET BOYS [ LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE
>> Jimmy: THAT'S OKAY. JUST REMEMBER WHAT PROFESSOR TOM BRADY TOLD US, THAT IF
WE'RE EVER IN A SITUATION LIKE THIS, YOU PRESS THIS BUTTON, AND WE WILL BOTH IMMEDIATELY
START CRYING [ LAUGHTER ] HERE WE GO
[ FAKE CRYING IT'S WORKING OUR CRYING IS CAUSING THE KOALA
TO BE SAVED! >> GARAGE, MINAJ [ LAUGHTER ]
WE DID IT. >> Jimmy: YES, LET'S HIGH FIVE AND SAY THE SECRET SUPERHERO
CATCH PHRASE ON THREE. ONE, TWO, THREE. IRI -- IRIDI -- COLOPTICUS,
DUDE [ LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE END, SCENE
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE * >> Jimmy: MY THANKS --
MY THANKS TO COLSON BAKER, AKA MACHINE GUN KELLY. WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK WITH
HARRY KANE [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE *
>> Jimmy: OUR NEXT GUEST IS ONE OF THE BIGGEST SOCCER STARS IN THE WORLD, AND HE'S THE CAPTAIN
OF THE ENGLAND NATIONAL TEAM THEY'LL BE COMPETING IN THE WORLD CUP LATER THIS YEAR.
EVERYONE, PLEASE WELCOME, HARRY KANE
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE
* >> Jimmy: THANK YOU SO MUCH. >> HOW WE DOING?
>> Jimmy: THANK YOU SO MUCH. WELCOME TO "THE TONIGHT SHOW." THANK YOU FOR BEING HERE
>> THANKS FOR HAVING ME. >> Jimmy: YOU -- YOU ARE MY -- YOU ARE MY "FIFA" PLAYER WHEN I
PLAY VIDEO GAMES >> YOU PLAY "FIFA" [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ]
>> Jimmy: I PLAY YOU YEAH, YOU'RE MY GUY. >> OKAY.
>> Jimmy: SO, I JUST WANT TO SAY THANK YOU FOR ALL THE WINS >> ANY GOAL -- ANY GOALS
>> Jimmy: YEAH, FANTASTIC, OH, ARE YOU KIDDING ME YEAH
"KANE! I GET IT ALL THE TIME, YEAH. THAT'S -
[ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] YOU'RE ONE OF THE TOP SOCCER PLAYERS IN THE WORLD, YOU'RE
CAPTAIN OF THE ENGLAND NATIONAL TEAM YOU'VE WON COUNTLESS AWARDS.
THERE'S AN EXHIBIT ABOUT YOU AT THE MUSEUM OF LONDON, RIGHT NOW.
>> THAT'S RIGHT, YEAH. >> Jimmy: WHEN YOU WERE A KID, DID, LIKE, YOUR COACHES THINK
LIKE, "OH, THIS -- THIS KID, HARRY, IS GONNA BE A A SUPERSTAR?
>> NO, I DON'T THINK SO. I DON'T THINK -- I MEAN, I WAS GOOD WHEN I WAS YOUNGER, BUT I
DON'T THINK I WAS THE BEST PLAYER ON THE TEAM AND I REALLY HAD TO KIND OF
WORK HARD TO KIND OF PROVE PEOPLE WRONG BUT I THINK THAT'S WHAT MADE
ME, KIND OF, WHO I AM TODAY, AND GOT ME TO THE LEVEL I GOT TO, 'CAUSE THAT KIND OF
SELF-BELIEF, THAT DRIVE, THAT DETERMINATION. AND THAT'S KIND OF WHAT THE
MUSEUM'S THERE, TO KIND OF -- KIDS CAN GO AND LOOK AT THAT AND SEE MY JOURNEY, AND
HOPEFULLY ONE DAY THEY CAN ASPIRE TO BE WHERE I AM. >> Jimmy: WHAT -- WHAT GETS YOU
INSPIRED WHAT -- WHAT -- WHAT DO YOU WATCH, OR WHAT DO YOU READ,
WHERE YOU GO LIKE, "OH, THAT'S INSPIRES ME? >> YEAH, I MEAN, ONE THING THAT
DID INSPIRE ME, KIND OF, GROWING UP WAS ACTUALLY A TOM BRADY DOCUMENTARY.
I WAS -- I WAS AWAY AT ANOTHER CLUB ALONE, AND, KIND OF, I WASN'T GETTING THE TEAM.
AND IT WAS KIND OF THAT PERIOD IN MY -- I WAS 18-YEARS-OLD -- IT WAS LIKE, "IF I CAN'T PLAY
HERE, HOW CAN I PLAY FOR MY TEAM?" TOTTENHAM, AT THE TIME
AND COME ACROSS THIS DOCUMENTARY ON YOUTUBE IT WAS -- I THINK IT WAS CALLED
"THE BRADY 6," IT WAS KIND OF ABOUT HOW HE GOT PICKED IN THE 6th ROUND, AND THEN BECOME WHO
HE BECOME, ONE OF THE GREATEST SPORTSMEN EVER AND IT JUST GAVE ME A REAL
BELIEF THAT IT WAS POSSIBLE FOR ME TO GO ON, AND KIND OF HAVE THAT -- HAVE THAT CAREER
AND YEAH, THANKFULLY I WAS ABLE TO DO THAT >> Jimmy: IT'S A BOOST, YEAH
AND YOU -- YOU'VE GOTTEN TO BE FRIENDS WITH TOM BRADY NOW, RIGHT?
>> YEAH, I MEAN, WE -- WE'VE GOT IN TOUCH I MEAN, I WAS KIND OF FOLLOWING
HIM ON INSTAGRAM, AND HE KIND OF COMMENTED ON ONE OF MY -- MY PICTURES WHEN I --
>> Jimmy: YOU SLID INTO HIS DMs? [ LAUGHTER ]
>> I SLID INTO HIS DMs AND -- NO, HE WAS A GREAT GUY WE KIND OF GOT TALKING
I KIND OF -- I'M -- I'M AN NFL FAN. SO I WAS KIND OF WISHING HIM
LUCK FOR -- FOR THE SEASON AND STUFF. AND YEAH, JUST KIND OF GREW
A RELATIONSHIP FROM THERE, REALLY >> Jimmy: DID YOU KNOW THAT HE
WAS GOING TO COME OUT OF RETIREMENT >> I MEAN, I WASN'T 100% SURE.
HE ACTUALLY COME TO -- TO A GAME, ONE OF OUR GAMES IN THE UK ABOUT TWO MONTHS AGO.
IT WAS ACTUALLY THE DAY BEFORE HE ANNOUNCED HE WAS COMING BACK TO PLAY.
AND I ASKED HIM, I WAS LIKE, "OH, HOW ARE YOU GETTING ON? HOW IS RETIREMENT TREATING
YOU? AND HIS FACE JUST WAS LIKE, "MM, I'M NOT SURE IF I'M READY
YET. SO, I MEAN, HE DIDN'T, LIKE, SAY HE WASN'T --
>> Jimmy: YEAH, YOU WERE LIKE, "WAIT A SECOND DID HE JUST SAY THAT -- WHAT I
THINK HE DID?" >> YEAH, PRETTY MUCH SO, I MEAN, YEAH
SO, NEXT DAY, HE ANNOUNCED IT, WHICH WAS -- I THOUGHT IT WAS GREAT, YOU KNOW.
IT'S GREAT I -- I LOVE WATCHING HIM >> Jimmy: YEAH
>> AND IT'S GREAT FOR THE SPORT. >> Jimmy: IF EVER EMERGENCY
NEED BE, AND THEY NEED A KICKER FOR THE BUCCANEERS, OR THE NEW YORK GIANTS, OR THE JETS -
>> YEAH. [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] >> Jimmy: COULD YOU STEP IN?
WOULD YOU BE A GOOD KICKER COULD YOU KICK FIELD GOALS >> I MEAN, I FEEL LIKE I COULD
I'D PUT MYSELF UP THERE FOR SURE >> Jimmy: YEAH
WE'RE -- LIKE TO -- I DON'T HAVE ANY TIE-IN WITH ANY ORGANIZATION, BUT WE WOULD LOVE
TO WELCOME YOU TO NEW YORK - [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] -- TO PLAY FOR EITHER ONE.
RIGHT NOW, YOU'RE FOUR GOALS AWAY FROM BEING ENGLAND'S TOP GOAL-SCORER OF ALL-TIME.
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE I MEAN, WHAT -- WHAT DOES THAT -- I MEAN, HOW ARE YOU
FEELING GOING INTO THIS -- THIS YEAR'S WORLD CUP >> YEAH, I MEAN, I'M EXCITED
YOU KNOW, THE LAST WORLD CUP WAS REALLY SPECIAL WE GOT TO THE SEMIFINAL, WHICH
WAS THE FIRST SEMIFINAL WE'D GOT TO IN LIKE, 30 YEARS AS A NATION
AND THE COUNTRY WAS GOING PRETTY MAD BUT, OF COURSE, WE FELL THAT
ONE STEP SHORT, SO I'M REALLY LOOKING FORWARD TO THIS ONE. WE HAVE A GREAT TEAM
REALLY GOOD PLAYERS, REALLY GOOD COACH WE'VE BEEN, KIND OF BUILDING
NICELY TO -- TO THIS WORLD CUP AND I'M REALLY LOOKING FORWARD TO IT.
AND HOPEFULLY, YEAH, CAN TRY AND BREAK THAT GOAL RECORD WHILST WE'RE THERE
>> Jimmy: WOW, HARRY KANE. WE -- YOU KNOW, I WAS GOING TO CHALLENGE YOU TO SOMETHING,
SOME TYPE OF -- BUT YOU WOULD JUST CRUSH ME IN ANYTHING. BUT THEN I GO, "OH, THIS MIGHT
BE A GOOD IDEA." WOULD YOU -- WOULD YOU LIKE TO PLAY ME IN A GAME OF FOOSBALL?
>> LET'S DO IT [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE >> Jimmy: A MINI -- A MINI
FOOSBALL TABLE HERE. >> HAVE YOU BEEN -- HAVE YOU BEEN PRACTICING?
>> Jimmy: I HAVE NOT BEEN PRACTICING, NO, LET ME JUST SEE WHAT IT'S LIKE
OKAY, GOOD ALL RIGHT, THAT'S ME THERE OKAY, GOOD
FIRST ONE TO TWO WINS? IS THAT OKAY >> OKAY, LET'S DO IT, YEAH
>> Jimmy: ALL RIGHT, BUDDY GOOD LUCK. NO -- NO HARD FEELINGS, RIGHT?
>> ALL THE BEST, YEAH? >> Jimmy: YEAH *
>> OH. OH >> Jimmy: MY GOD
[ BELL DINGS ] [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE YOU'RE THAT FAST
ALL RIGHT. 1-0. >> 1-NIL
>> Jimmy: THAT WAS A GOOD SHOT >> THANK YOU THAT'S A STRIKER, RIGHT?
>> Jimmy: YEAH, THAT WAS A A STRIKER. OKAY, READY?
* HUH, NO! [ BELL DINGS ]
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE I DID IT MYSELF. I CAN'T EVEN WIN AT THAT
I CAN'T EVEN WIN IN THIS GAME! HARRY KANE, EVERYBODY. THE CHAMP.
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE YOU CAN WATCH HIM COMPETE IN THE WORLD CUP LATER THIS YEAR.
LAINEY WILSON PERFORMS FOR US, AFTER THE BREAK. STICK AROUND
YOU CRUSHED ME [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE *
>> Jimmy: OUR NEXT GUEST IS THE REIGNING ACM NEW FEMALE ARTIST OF THE YEAR.
PERFORMING HER NEW SINGLE "HEART LIKE A TRUCK," GIVE IT UP FOR LAINEY WILSON
[ HEART BEAT ] * * I NEVER STAY IN
ONE PLACE TOO LONG * * THE DIRT ROAD SINGIN' ME A SIREN'S SONG *
* I GOTTA FIND A FIEL I NEED TO SPIN MY WHEELS * * I GOTTA A HANKERIN'
FOR FOUR WIDE TIRES * * AND I CAN'T HELP IT IT'S THE WAY I'M WIRED *
* BOY YOU GET TOO CLOSE BOY YOU NEED TO KNOW * * I GOT A HEART
LIKE A TRUCK * * IT'S BEEN DRU THROUGH THE MUD *
* RUNS ON DREAM AND GASOLINE * * AND THAT OLD HIGHWA
HOLDS THE KEY * * IT'S GOTTA LEAD FOO DOWN WHEN IT'S LEAVIN' *
* LORD KNOWS IT'S TAKEN A HELL OF A BEATIN' * * A LITTLE BIT OF LOV
IS ALL THAT IT'S NEEDIN' * * BUT IT'S GOOD AS IT IS TOUGH *
* I GOT A HEART LIKE A TRUCK * * THERE AIN'T NO BRAKIN
WHEN I THROW IT IN DRIVE * * DON'T ALWAYS KEEP I IN-BETWEEN THE LINES *
* IF YOU'RE READY FOR A RIDE * * PEDAL DOW
STATE OF MIND * * BOY I TELL YOU WHAT YOU BETTER BUCKLE UP *
* I GOT A HEART LIKE A TRUCK * * IT'S BEEN DRU
THROUGH THE MUD * * RUNS ON DREAM AND GASOLINE *
* AND THAT OLD HIGHWA HOLDS THE KEY * * IT'S GOTTA LEAD FOO
DOWN WHEN IT'S LEAVIN' * * LORD KNOWS IT'S TAKEN A HELL OF A BEATIN' *
* A LITTLE BIT OF LOV IS ALL THAT IT'S NEEDIN' * * BUT IT'S GOOD
AS IT IS TOUGH * * I GOT A HEART LIKE A TRUCK *
* * GO ON AND SEE IF YOU CA KNOCK OFF THE DUST YEAH *
* SHINE IT UP REV IT UP AND LET IT RUN YEAH * * IT GETS A HIGH RIDIN'
OFF INTO THE SUN YEAH * * I GOT A HEART LIKE A TRUCK *
* IT'S BEEN DRU THROUGH THE MUD * * RUNS ON DREAM
AND GASOLINE * * AND THAT OLD HIGHWA HOLDS THE KEY *
* IT'S GOTTA LEAD FOO DOWN WHEN IT'S LEAVIN' * * LORD KNOWS IT'S TAKEN
A HELL OF A BEATIN' * * A LITTLE BIT OF LOV IS ALL THAT IT'S NEEDIN' *
* BUT IT'S GOOD AS IT IS TOUGH * * I GOT A HEART
OH LIKE A TRUCK * * GO ON AND SEE IF YOU CA KNOCK OFF THE DUST YEAH *
* SHINE IT UP REV IT UP AND LET IT RUN YEAH * * IT GETS A HIGH RIDIN'
OFF INTO THE SUN YEAH * * IT GETS A HIGH RIDIN' OFF INTO THE SUN *
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE >> Jimmy: OH, THAT'S HOW YOU DO IT RIGHT THERE
THAT'S HOW YOU DO IT LAINEY WILSON! "HEART LIKE A TRUCK" IS OUT
NOW. WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK, EVERYBODY COME ON BACK
OH, MY GOSH! * >> Jimmy: MY THANKS TO
COLSON BAKER, AKA MACHINE GUN KELLY, HARRY KANE, CHANNING TATUM
LAINEY WILSON, ONCE AGAIN. AND THE ROOTS, RIGHT THERE, FROM PHILADELPHIA,
PENNSYLVANIA THANK YOU TO ALL OF OUR U.S. MILITARY SERVICE MEMBERS
THANK YOU FOR WATCHING [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE STAY TUNED FOR "LATE NIGHT WITH
SETH MEYERS. GOODNIGHT, EVERYBODY THANK YOU.