>> Steve: FROM STUDIO 6B IN ROCKEFELLER CENTER IN THE HEART
OF NEW YORK CITY, IT'S "THE TONIGHT SHOW STARRING JIMMY FALLON."
TONIGHT, JOIN JIMMY AND HIS GUESTS - HUGH JACKMAN
BRIDGET EVERETT, MUSICAL GUEST RED HOT CHILI PEPPERS AND FEATURING THE
LEGENDARY ROOTS CREW >> Questlove: SHOW NUMBER ONE. >> Steve: AND NOW, HERE HE IS,
JIMMY FALLON
*
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE >> Jimmy: HELLO, EVERYBODY
HI, I'M JIMMY FALLON, AND WELCOME TO "THE TONIGHT SHOW." IT'S FREAKY FRIDAY TONIGHT
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE HEY, DID YOU HEAR THE BIG NEWS ABOUT MIKE PENCE
YOU REMEMBER HIM, RIGHT? CASPER THE HOMOPHOBIC GHOST? [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ]
MIKE PENCE RELEASED A POLICY AGENDA, WHICH IS A STRONG INDICATION HE PLANS TO RUN
AGAINST DONALD TRUMP IN 2024 PENCE VERSUS TRUMP, WOULDN'T THAT BE SOMETHING?
LIKE LOGAN ROY VERSUS COUSIN GREG [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ]
MEANWHILE, FOX NEWS JUST ANNOUNCED THEY'VE HIRED CAITLYN JENNER AS AN ON-AIR
CONTRIBUTOR TO THEIR CHANNEL FOX PUT OUT A PRESS RELEASE THAT SAID, "CAITLIN'S STORY IS
AN INSPIRATION TO US ALL SHE'S A TRAIL BLAZER IN THE LGBTQ+ COMMUNITY WHO WILL NOT
BE ALLOWED TO USE THE BATHROOM AT OUR OFFICE. [ LAUGHTER ]
YOU KNOW, I LOVE BEING HERE IN NEW YORK I WANT TO TELL YOU ABOUT THIS
CRAZY THING THAT HAPPENED IN L.A. LAST WEEK SO, YOU KNOW THE ACTOR
WILL SMITH [ LAUGHTER ] OH, YOU'VE HEARD THIS STORY?
OKAY, I DIDN'T KNOW IF IT MADE IT EAST, SO I'LL SKIP IT, THEN [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ]
ARE YOU FIGURING OUT WHAT'S HAPPENING NOW? YOU'RE NOTICING WHAT DAY IT IS
AND -- OR NO, MAYBE, I DON'T KNOW APRIL FOOLS', EVERYBODY.
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE SHOW OF HANDS, HOW MANY OF YOU ARE DISAPPOINTED
BE HONEST. [ LAUGHTER ] OKAY, HOW MANY ARE VERY
DISAPPOINTED BE HONEST. AND HOW MANY OF YOU ARE
THINKING, "OH, MY GOD, JIMMY FALLON LOOKS TERRIBLE, I HOPE HE ISN'T SICK!"
[ LAUGHTER ] WE PULLED THE OLD SWITCHEROO IN FACT, RIGHT NOW, JIMMY
"F-WORD," AS WE CALL HIM BACK HOME - [ LAUGHTER ]
-- IS HOSTING MY SHOW IN L.A WE SWAPPED EVERYTHING. WE SWAPPED SHOWS, BANDS, EVEN
WIVES. BAD NEWS, NANCY, FAT JIMMY'S COMING HOME!
[ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] [ RIM SHOT ] THIS IS SOMETHING WE'VE BEEN
PLANNING FOR A LONG -- FOR YEARS. IT WAS A TOP SECRET OPERATION.
EVEN THE ROOTS DIDN'T KNOW THIS WAS HAPPENING UNTIL TODAY, RIGHT?
>> Questlove: YEAH, NO IDEA. >> Jimmy: JIMMY DOESN'T TRUST YOU, IS WHAT -
[ LAUGHTER ] CONGRATULATIONS ON THAT OSCAR, BY THE WAY
QUESTLOVE WON AN OSCAR [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE NOBODY IN MY BAND HAS AN OSCAR
>> Tariq: NOT YET. >> Jimmy: I HAVE TO SAY, YOUR MOVIE IS FANTASTIC, AND YOUR
SPEECH WAS BEAUTIFUL ACTUALLY, I WATCHED IT AS SOON AS I STOPPED REWINDING
500 TIMES. >> Questlove: YEAH. >> Jimmy: CONGRATULATIONS.
[ LAUGHTER ] EVERYBODY HERE'S BEEN SO NICE. I GOT TO MEET JIMMY'S WRITERS,
GOT TO MEET HIS PRODUCERS, THE SECURITY GUY TOOK ME ON A TOUR I EVEN GOT TO MEET THE CHEF WHO
CUTS HIS CHICKEN NUGGETS INTO DINOSAUR SHAPES. [ LAUGHTER ]
WONDERFUL GUY. IT'S EXCITING TO BE HERE, I CAN'T --
THIS IS REALLY -- I AM -- ALWAYS DREAMED OF HOSTING A LATE-NIGHT TALK SHOW, NOW
THAT DREAM HAS FINALLY COME TRUE [ LAUGHTER ]
SHOULD WE CHECK IN ON JIMMY TO SEE HOW IT'S GOING IN HOLLYWOOD?
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE YEAH IT WAS A RHETORICAL QUESTION,
REALLY YOU DON'T HAVE A CHOICE, I'M CHECKING IN WITH JIMMY EITHER
WAY. BUT -- OH HEY, THERE'S JIMMY RIGHT NOW!
>> Jimmy: LET'S SEE HOW HE'S DOING. JIMMY, ARE YOU THERE
>> Jimmy: I'M HERE I'M IN YOUR PLACE! [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE
ISN'T THIS WEIRD >> WOW >> Jimmy: JIMMY, A BIG CHUNK OF
YOUR AUDIENCE ALMOST LEFT WHEN I WALKED OUT [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ]
I SAW SADNESS. >> FOR THE FIRST TIME TONIGHT I GOT A GREAT SITTING OVATION.
IT WAS UNBIELAVABLE. HOW'S IT GOING OVER THERE, BUD YOU LOOK GREAT
>> Jimmy: IT'S GOING WELL, EVERYBODY'S BEEN GREAT I WENT THROUGH YOUR STUFF AND
EVERYTHING SO THANK YOU FOR HAVING -- LETTING US -- LETTING ME DO
THIS WE'VE BEEN TALKING ABOUT THIS FOR A LONG TIME, I WAS JUST
TELLING EVERYBODY. >> APRIL, 2020. >> Jimmy: YES, APRIL, 2020 IS WHEN WE
CONCEIVED THIS [ LAUGHTER ] >> DO YOU LIKE THE STUDIO?
DO YOU ENJOY IT? >> Jimmy: NOT REALLY [ LAUGHTER ]
NO YEAH, NO, YEAH, IT'S BEAUTIFUL IT'S ABSOLUTELY BEAUTIFUL.
IT MAKES ME REALIZE WHAT A DUMP OUR PLACE IS [ LAUGHTER ]
HOW ABOUT GUILLERMO? IS HE ALL RIGHT? IS HE DOING OKAY
>> GUILLERMO'S OKAY -- COME HERE, COME HERE. COME HERE BUD.
YEAH I HAVE GUILLERMO. HE'S DOING ALL RIGHT. HE'S OKAY. >> HI JIMMY.
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE >> Jimmy: GUILLERMO, DID YOU REMEMBER TO TAKE YOUR VITAMINS
>> YEAH, I DID TAKE MY VITAMIN TEQUILA. >> Jimmy: OKAY, GOOD
[ LAUGHTER ] ALL RIGHT. >> IS HIGGINS THERE AS WELL?
>> Jimmy: YEAH, HIGGINS IS RIGHT HERE ALSO, ACTUALLY. HE'S -
[ LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE >> Steve: I PUT ON A MOUSTACHE SO YOU FEEL AT HOME.
>> Jimmy: THANK YOU. >> Steve: YOU KNOW >> Jimmy: THAT'S NICE.
IT'S A GREAT LOOK FOR YOU. [ INDISCERNIBLE HIGGINS LOOKS LIKE HE SHOULD
BE - [ INDISCERNIBLE HIGGINS LOOKS LIKE HE SHOULD BE
SWINDLING WIDOWS OUT OF THEIR FORTUNE. [ LAUGHTER ]
>> Steve: "FLIMFLAMMED, I SAY! >> Jimmy: GUILLERMO, IF YOU NEED ANYTHING BEFORE THAT, CALL
ELLEN, OKAY? [ LAUGHTER ] >> ALL RIGHT, I WILL FOR SURE.
[ LAUGHTER ] >> Jimmy: I -- I DON'T KNOW, HAVE -
>> THIS IS WILD, BUD IT'S BEEN AN AMAZING EXPERIENCE
I LOVE THAT WE DID THIS. I CAN'T BELIEVE WE PULLED IT OFF.
I REALLY CAN'T BELIEVE IT. >> Jimmy: I'M STILL NOT SURE OF HOW BOTH OF OUR MUSICAL GUESTS
ARE RED HOT CHILI PEPPERS, BUT I GUESS WE'LL FIGURE THAT OUT AT THE END OF THE SHOW
[ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] >> YEAH, THAT'S RIGHT. RED HOT CHILI PEPPERS ARE BOTH
OF OUR MUSICAL GUESTS. TONIGHT, THEIR NEW ALBUM'S OUT --
>> Jimmy: ALL RIGHT, HAVE FUN. >> JIMMY, THIS IS -- THIS IS MAGICAL.
I -- I LOVE IT I LOVE -- I LOVE TALKING TO YOU.
>> Jimmy: YEAH, THIS IS A LOT OF FUN I ESPECIALLY LOVE TALKING TO
YOU OVER A SATELLITE, IT'S EVEN BETTER THAT WAY. [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ]
>> ALL RIGHT, WELL, I THINK WE SHOULD MOVE ON WITH THE SHOW - >> Jimmy: YES.
OKAY [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE YEAH, GREAT.
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ALL RIGHT. YOU WANNA -- YOU WANNA HANG UP
>> NO, NO, NO, NO, NO, YOU -- YOU HANG UP FIRST. >> Jimmy: NO, YOU HANG UP.
COME ON, YOU HANG UP [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] >> NO, YOU HANG UP
>> Jimmy: NO, YOU HANG UP! >> NO, YOU HANG UP! YOU HANG UP!
YOU HANG UP! >> Jimmy: ALL RIGHT. [ INDISCERNIBLE
WE'LL HANG UP AT THE SAME TIME, ALL RIGHT? READY?
ONE, TWO, THREE. >> ONE, TWO -- >> Jimmy: OH, WELL, WE GOT IT
ALL SCREWED UP [ LAUGHTER ] ALL RIGHT.
[ INDISCERNIBLE I'LL SEE YOU AT HOME, JIMMY. [ APPLAUSE ]
ALL RIGHT, WELL THAT'S JIMMY FALLON IN L.A. [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE
WE'RE GONNA -- IT'S GONNA BE FUN. DON'T BE BUMMED.
BRIDGET EVERETT IS WITH US WE HAVE MUSIC FROM RED HOT CHILI PEPPERS, TONIGHT
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE AND FROM "THE MUSIC MAN," THE TOAST OF BROADWAY,
HUGH JACKMAN, WOLVERINE HIMSELF, IS HERE WITH US [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE
OR MAYBE IT'LL TURN OUT TO BE HUGH GRANT, WHO KNOWS, ANYTHING IS POSSIBLE TONIGHT.
YOU KNOW, PEOPLE MISTAKE ME WITH JIMMY FALLON ALL THE TIME AND SAME FOR HIM
SO, AS A PUBLIC SERVICE TO US, REALLY, WE PUT OUR HEADS TOGETHER TO COME UP WITH A LIST
OF THE THINGS PEOPLE SAY TO US MOST
>> Jimmy: "HI, I'M JIMMY KIMMEL PEOPLE OFTEN CONFUSE ME FOR
JIMMY FALLON >> I'M JIMMY FALLON. PEOPLE OFTEN CONFUSE ME FOR
JIMMY KIMMEL OFTEN. >> Jimmy: A LOT.
>> PEOPLE COME UP TO ME AND SAY, "KIMMEL CAN I GET A PICTURE?" >> Jimmy:
"JIMMY FALLON, CAN I GET A A SELFIE?" >> "HEY, WHERE'S GUILLERMO?"
>> Jimmy: "LOVE YOU AND JUSTIN TIMBERLAKE. >> "MATT DAMON SUCKS."
>> Jimmy: " I GOT YOUR CHILDREN'S BOOKS IT'S HOW MY SON LEARNED TO SAY
DADA." >> "YOU'RE THINNER IN PERSON." >> Jimmy: "YOU'RE FATTER IN
PERSON." [ LIGHT LAUGHTER >> "I THOUGHT YOU HAD A BEARD. >> Jimmy: "IS THAT YOUR ACTUAL
HAIR?" >> "I LIKE WHEN IT YOU TAKE THE KIDS' HALLOWEEN CANDY.
>> Jimmy: "LOVE WHEN YOU HOST 'SNL.'" >> LOVE JOHN, WIN BEN STEIN'S MONEY.
>> Jimmy: "FEVER PITCH!" >> "MY UNCLE RON HATES YOU WILL YOU MAKE A VIDEO FOR HIM?"
>> Jimmy: "HISTORY RAP." >> "I'M MORE OF A COLBERT FAN. >> Jimmy: "I'M MORE OF A
A COLBERT FAN. [ LAUGHTER ] >> "YOU USED TO BE FUNNY."
>> Jimmy: "WHEN ARE YOU GOING TO DO ANOTHER MOVIE WITH QUEEN LATIFAH?
>> "YOU'RE TOO HARD ON TRUMP." >> Jimmy: "YOU'RE NOT HARD ENOUGH ON TRUMP.
[ LAUGHTER ] >> "IS GUILLERMO DRUNK ALL THE TIME?"
>> Jimmy: "HIGGINS IS A STONER, RIGHT? >> "ARE YOU HIGH DURING THE
SHOW?" >> Jimmy: "YOU'RE ON TOO LATE. >> "I CAN'T STAY UP.
BUT I LOVE 'MEAN TWEETS.'" >> Jimmy: "I WATCHED YOU IN PRISON."
>> "REMEMBER WHEN YOU GAVE OUT THE WRONG OSCAR? OOH." >> Jimmy: "LOVE YOUR ICE
CREAM. >> "MATT DAMON SUCKS." >> Jimmy: "MY MOM HAS THE HOTS
FOR YOU. >> "MY DAD CAN'T STAND YOU." >> Jimmy: "YOU SHOULD TALK MORE
ABOUT POLITICS." >> "YOU SHOULD TALK LESS ABOUT POLITICS."
[ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] >> Jimmy: "TRUMP." >> "TRUMP.
>> Jimmy: "YOU HAVE SUCH A GOOD SINGING VOICE. >> "YOU SHOULD BRING BACK 'THE
MAN SHOW.'" >> Jimmy: "QUESTLOVE!" >> "JIMMY KIMMEL!"
>> Jimmy: "JIMMY FALLON! >> "JIMMY KIMMEL!" >> Jimmy: "JIMMY FALLON!
>> "JIMBLE KIMBLE! >> Jimmy: "JIMMY FA-FONE." >> "JOHNNY CARSON!
>> Jimmy: "CARSON DALY!" >> "DAILY SHOW." >> Together: "I MISS DAVE.
[ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] >> Jimmy: I MISS DAVE TOO. >> EVERY NIGHT
SHOULD WE CALL HIM >> Jimmy: YEAH, LET'S CALL HIM >> YEAH.
>> Jimmy: YES. I ACTUALLY HAVE HIS PHONE NUMBER
>> OH, PERFECT [ DIAL TONE ] >> HI, YOU'VE REACHED DAVE LETTERMAN
PLEASE DON'T LEAVE A MESSAGE, AND IF YOUR NAME IS JIMMY, DON'T CALL HERE AGAIN.
[ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] [ BEEP ] >> GUESS HE DOESN'T WANT YOU CALLING HIM
>> Jimmy: I'M PRETTY SURE HE'S TALKING ABOUT YOU CALLING HIM. >> IT'S YOUR PHONE
>> Jimmy: WELL, HE SAID "JIMMY." THE WAY HE SAID JIMMY WAS
CLEARLY -- >> YEAH, I KNOW, BUT THAT'S -- >> Jimmy: SHOULD WE CALL HIM
ONE MORE TIME? >> YEAH, LET'S CALL HIM AGAIN. >> Jimmy: 'CAUSE MAYBE HE'S ON
THE OTHER LINE >> I'LL CALL HIM FROM MY PHONE >> Jimmy: OKAY
[ DIAL TONE [ LAUGHTER ] >> HI, YOU'VE REACHED
DAVE LETTERMAN PLEASE DON'T LEAVE A MESSAGE, AND IF YOUR NAME IS JIMMY, OR
JIMMY, DON'T CALL HERE AGAIN [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] [ BEEP ] >> Jimmy: YEAH.
THAT WAS YOU HE SCREENED YOU. >> YEAH, I DON'T -- I DON'T
THINK SO LOOK, I -- WE'RE NOT GONNA FIGHT ABOUT THIS, OKAY
I THINK I TOLD YOU, I'M A LOVER, NOT A FIGHTER [ LAUGHTER ]
>> I'VE HEARD IT ALL BEFORE. SHE TOLD ME THAT I'M A FOREVER LOVER, DON'T YOU REMEMBER?
>> Jimmy: WHEN AFTER LOVIN' ME, SHE SAID SHE COULDN'T LOVE ANOTHER.
>> THAT WHAT SHE SAID? >> Jimmy: AFTER SHE SAID, "YOU KEEP DREAMING.
* I DON'T BELIEVE IT * [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE >> Jimmy: AW, WE HAVE A GREAT
SHOW FOR YOU TONIGHT YOU DON'T LIKE IT, IT'S OKAY, IT'S NOT MINE.
BUT WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK WITH "THANK YOU NOTES." [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE
* >> Jimmy: THANK YOU "THE TONIGHT SHOW" FOR LETTING ME
SWITCH SPOTS WITH JIMMY TODAY AND FOR LETTING ME EAT ALL THE FOOD MARKED "JIMMY ONLY DO NOT
TOUCH IN THE OFFICE FRIDGE." [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] >> Jimmy: WE HAVE THE ROOTS.
WELCOME BACK TO "THE TONIGHT SHOW" STARRING, ONE OF THE JIMMIES.
BOY ARE MY KIDS GOING TO BE CONFUSED WHEN JIMMY FALLON PICKS THEM UP FROM SCHOOL
TODAY. [ LAUGHTER ] TONIGHT IS FRIDAY, WHICH, AS
YOU KNOW, IF YOU WATCH THE SHOW, IS WHEN JIMMY LIKES TO CATCH UP ON PERSONAL STUFF
AND SINCE THERE ARE SO MANY PEOPLE TO THANK, I THOUGHT I MIGHT TAKE SOME TIME TO WRITE
SOME THANK YOU NOTES IS THAT OKAY WITH EVERYBODY? [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE
ALL RIGHT. I'VE GOT A PEN I'VE GOT NOTES
JAMES, MAY I HAVE SOME -- YES, OH YES *
>> Steve: OH, WOW. [ LAUGHTER ] NEVER SEEN HIM SMILE
>> Jimmy: ONE PERSON HAPPIER THAT I'M HERE. [ LAUGHTER ]
>> Steve: WOW. >> Jimmy: ALL RIGHT. >> Steve: DANG
>> Jimmy: HERE WE GO * THANK YOU, "THE TONIGHT SHOW,"
FOR LETTING ME SWITCH SPOTS WITH JIMMY TODAY AND FOR LETTING ME EAT ALL THE
FOOD MARKED "JIMMY ONLY, DO NOT TOUCH," IN THE OFFICE FRIDGE [ LAUGHTER ]
HALF A CHICKEN PARM, AND IT WAS DELICIOUS. [ LAUGHTER ]
* THANK YOU, JIMMY FALLON, FOR LEAVING ME THIS COPY OF YOUR
2005 MEGA HIT "FEVER PITCH" ON VHS. [ LAUGHTER ]
I FAST FORWARDED RIGHT TO THE SEX PARTS. [ LAUGHTER ]
JIMMY, SURPRISINGLY, NOT A HAIR ON HIS BOTTOM. [ LAUGHTER ]
>> Steve: NO, NO * >> Jimmy: THANK YOU,
NEW YORK CITY, FOR BEING THE CITY THAT NEVER SLEEPS THOUGH IT DOES SOMETIMES TAKE
A NAP AFTER IT MASTURBATES ON THE SUBWAY [ LAUGHTER ]
YOU GET THAT, RIGHT, HIGGINS [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE >> Steve: OH, I GET IT
* >> Jimmy: THANK YOU, CRACKERJACKS, FOR LETTING US
EXPERIENCE WHAT CANDY IN THE GREAT DEPRESSION TASTED LIKE [ LAUGHTER ]
THOUGH YOU DO GET A TOY. >> Steve: YOU GET A TOY. YOU GET A TOY.
>> Jimmy: DON'T TRUST THE CANDY THAT HAS TO GIVE YOU A TOY [ LAUGHTER ]
* THANK YOU, DR. SCHOLL'S, FOR DEDICATING YOUR LIFE TO FEET
WITHOUT BEING A PERVERT ABOUT IT [ LAUGHTER ]
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE >> Tariq: FEET [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ]
* >> Jimmy: THANK YOU, COUPLES WITH A SLEEP NUMBER BED, FOR
COMING UP WITH A SIMPLE WAY TO TELL THE WORLD, "WE STOPPED HAVING SEX TEN YEARS AGO."
[ LAUGHTER ] * THANK YOU, MATT DAMON, FOR
REMINDING US THAT IF YOU SET YOUR MIND TO IT, YOU CAN WIN AN OSCAR FOR WRITING EVEN WHEN YOU
CAN'T READ [ LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE [ RIM SHOT ]
THAT'S TRUE. IT'S AMAZING, THOUGH >> Steve: YEAH
* >> Jimmy: AND FINALLY, THANK YOU, APRIL FOOLS' DAY, FOR
BEING THE ONE DAY OF THE YEAR I CAN STEAL "THE TONIGHT SHOW" WITHOUT FIRST PROMISING IT TO
CONAN. [ LAUGHTER ] [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE
THERE YOU GO I'M DONE WITH "THANK YOU NOTES.
YOU'RE WELCOME WE'LL BE BACK WITH HUGH JACKMAN
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE * >> Jimmy: WELCOME BACK TO "THE
TONIGHT SHOW." I'M NOT JIMMY FALLON, I'M JIMMY KIMMEL
BUT I'M HERE, AND IT'S APRIL FOOLS' DAY, SO DEAL WITH IT, ALL RIGHT?
[ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] OUR FIRST GUEST TONIGHT IS THE BIGGEST STAR ON BROADWAY
HIS ENORMOUSLY SUCCESSFUL MUSICAL REVIVAL IS CALLED "THE MUSIC MAN.
* *
>> Jimmy: HE CAN DANCE PLEASE WELCOME HUGH JACKMAN!
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE *
>> Jimmy: I'M WEARING A NEW TOUPEE HOW ARE YOU DOING?
>> I'M DOING GOOD. GREAT TO SEE YOU >> Jimmy: DO THEY HAVE APRIL
FOOLS' DAY IN AUSTRALIA, YOUR HOMELAND >> WE HAVE IT.
IT'S AUSTRALIA, HELLO. YEAH [ LAUGHTER ]
LIKE, WE HAVE IT FOR THE ENTIRE MONTH OF APRIL ACTUALLY, I DO REMEMBER --
I REMEMBER ONE TIME MY DAD FREAKING OUT ON APRIL FOOLS' BECAUSE IN "THE SYDNEY MORNING
HERALD," VOLVO - WE HAD A VOLVO DO YOU REMEMBER THE OLD VOLVO?
THEY USED TO CALL THEM THE FRIDGE >> Jimmy: YEAH
>> YOU KNOW, THEY'RE LIKE A FRIDGE TURNED OVER SO, WE HAD WE HAD A FRIDGE
VOLVO. AND THEY HAD A FULL-PAGE AD ANNOUNCING THAT THERE WERE FAKE
VOLVOS OUT THERE AND YOU COULD TELL BY THE EMBLEM, WHATEVER THE EMBLEM OF VOLVO WAS, IT WAS
FLIPPED THE WRONG WAY. SO MY DAD'S LIKE RUNNING OUT AND FREAKING OUT
AND THEN WHEN WE FOUND OUT THIS WAS A FULL-PAGE APRIL FOOLS' JOKE
[ LAUGHTER ] MOST PEOPLE WOULD BE LIKE, "THAT'S BRILLIANT.
BUT MY DAD WAS LIKE, "OH, CURSES," LIKE. [ LAUGHTER ]
>> Jimmy: WAS YOUR DAD NOT A A FOOLING AROUND GUY >> WE USED TO WATCH "FAWLTY
TOWERS" TOGETHER AND HE COULDN'T LAUGH HE GOES, "THIS IS JUST TOO
CLOSE TO THE BONE. LIKE, HE WOULD GET TO -- >> Jimmy: REALLY
>> -- FREAKED OUT. YEAH >> Jimmy: WOW, YOU REALLY,
REBELLED, I GUESS, AGAINST THAT, DIDN'T YOU >> A LITTLE.
YEAH >> Jimmy: YEAH >> A LITTLE.
[ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] >> Jimmy: AND THANKS FOR KEEPING THIS A SECRET.
YOU'VE KNOWN ABOUT THIS FOR QUITE SOME TIME. >> I HAVE, THE WHOLE TIME.
>> Jimmy: ARE YOU GOOD AT KEEPING SECRETS IN GENERAL >> I'M THE WORST
>> Jimmy: YOU'RE NOT >> I'M THE WORST, I'M A BAD LIAR
I MEAN, FOR AN ACTOR, I MAKE A A LIVING OUT OF LYING. >> Jimmy: YEAH
>> I'M REALLY, REALLY BAD AT IT [ LAUGHTER ]
THE WORST TIME I HAD TO LIE, ACTUALLY, WAS WHEN I GOT THE ROLE OF WOLVERINE.
SO THIS WAS -- [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE [ LAUGHTER ]
SHAMELESS FISHING. NO, NO, NO I WENT TO TORONTO.
I AUDITIONED I GOT THE PART I HAD TO GO BACK TO L.A. TO
PICK UP MY STUFF AND THEY SAID, "WE NEED YOU THERE TOMORROW."
THEY HAD STARTED SHOOTING. SO I WENT THE NEXT DAY, AND THEY SAID, "BY THE WAY, WHEN
YOU GO BACK INTO CUSTOMS, JUST SAY THAT YOU'RE THERE FOR AN AUDITION."
AND I SAID, "OKAY, BUT I HAVE GOT THE PART, RIGHT? BECAUSE I JUST AUDITIONED.
THEY SAID, "NO, NO, SINCE WE HAVEN'T GOTTEN YOUR VISA YOU'RE AUSTRALIAN, THE VISA
HASN'T COME IN TIME. IT'LL BE FINE. JUST SAY IT'S AN AUDITION, AND
THEN WE'LL SORT IT OUT." [ LAUGHTER ] SO, THIS IS LIKE "MIDNIGHT
EXPRESS" FOR ME. I'M IN THE LINE. >> Jimmy: UH-HUH
>> "IT'S AN AUDITION THIS IS JUST AN AUDITION THIS IS JUST AN AUDITION."
I'M SWEATING, I'M SWEATING [ LAUGHTER ] THE GUY -- I'M LOOKING
THE GUY LOOKS KIND OF NERDY. I THINK, "I'M ALL RIGHT. AND I GET UP THERE, AND HE
GOES, "HEY, WHAT ARE YOU HERE FOR? AND I SAID, "OH, JUST DOING AN
AUDITION." AND HE GOES, "REALLY?" I SAID, "YEAH.
AND HE GOES, "WELL, THAT'S FUNNY, BECAUSE YOU SEEMED TO BE HERE LAST WEEK
WHAT WERE YOU HERE LAST WEEK FOR? [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ]
AND I'M LIKE, SWEAT JUST POURING DOWN [ LAUGHTER ]
AND I -- I LITERALLY THEN SAID, "NO, NO, IT'S NOT AN AUDITION, I'VE GOT THE PART," I JUST
BROKE. IT WAS PATHETIC. [ LAUGHTER ]
AND HE GOES, "GO OVER THERE. AND IT WAS THAT ROOM, YOU KNOW, LIKE THE ROOM.
>> Jimmy: I'VE BEEN IN THAT ROOM >> YOU DON'T WANT TO BE IN THAT
ROOM >> Jimmy: YEAH, I'VE BEEN IN THAT ROOM, YEAH.
>> THAT ROOM IS BAD. >> Jimmy: YEAH >> AND I WENT IN THERE, AND I
WAS THERE FOR, LIKE, AN HOUR AND A HALF AND HE MADE ME WAIT.
AND I WENT TO MAKE A PHONE CALL THAT GUY LITERALLY IS LIKE,
"GET OFF THE PHONE NOW!" >> Jimmy: REALLY >> "THIS IS SERIOUS, YOU HAVE
NO RIGHTS IN HERE, YOU HAVE NO PHONE CALLS. AND I'M SITTING THERE GOING,
"OKAY, FIRST OF ALL, I'VE JUST LOST THE BIGGEST BREAK OF MY LIFE
[ LAUGHTER ] I'M GOING TO GO TO JAIL, AND I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO.
>> Jimmy: AND YOU MET THE FIRST MEAN CANADIAN EVER >> EVER, YEAH.
[ LAUGHTER ] SO I FINALLY GET UP THERE. AND HE'S LIKE, "LISTEN, WE'RE
PROBABLY GOING TO SEND YOU BACK ON A PLANE AND I SAID, "LISTEN, I'M SORRY
IT'S JUST, I'VE GOT THIS PART IN THIS THING, AND I HAVEN'T GOT MY VISA.
AND HE GOES, "WHAT'S THE THING? AND I SAID, "WELL, IT'S
'X-MEN.' IT'S LIKE A COMIC BOOK." HE GOES, "WHAT?"
[ LAUGHTER ] I SAID - HE GOES, "YOU MEAN LIKE THE
ANIMATION THING, 'X-MEN?'" AND I GO, "WELL, NO, THEY'RE DOING A LIVE ACTION VERSION OF IT.
HE GOES, "WHAT?" [ LAUGHTER ] AND I SAID, "YEAH.
AND HE GOES, "WELL, WHAT DID YOU AUDITION FOR?" AND I SAID, "IT'S A CHARACTER
CALLED WOLVERINE." HE GOES, "WHAT!" [ LAUGHTER ]
AND HE LITERALLY LOOKED AT ME, AND THEN HE JUST -- HE GOES, "HEY, JIMMY, IT'S WOLVERINE!
THIS IS WOLVERINE! [ LAUGHTER ] HONESTLY, I WENT OUT THERE WITH
A POLICE ESCORT, JUST TO LET ME OUT. THIS GUY MADE ME SIGN
AUTOGRAPHS, EVERYTHING [ LAUGHTER ] >> Jimmy: WOLVERINE --
>> HE WAS A MAD "X-MEN" FAN. AND THAT'S THE ONLY REASON I ENDED UP GETTING THE PART.
>> Jimmy: THE BIGGEST CANADIAN SUPERHERO, TOO [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE
WOW. WELL, I'M GLAD HAD I KNOWN ANY OF THAT STUFF,
I NEVER WOULD HAVE ASKED YOU TO BE HERE TONIGHT. BUT I DO APPRECIATE IT
[ LAUGHTER ] >> I DID GET STRIP SEARCHED BEFORE THAT.
BUT WE WON'T GET INTO THAT [ LAUGHTER ] >> Jimmy: WE -- ACTUALLY, YOU
ARE DOING, WHAT, EIGHT SHOWS A A WEEK NOW >> EIGHT SHOWS A WEEK, YEAH.
>> Jimmy: AND SO THIS MAKES IT NINE THANK YOU FOR DOING IT
I COMPLAIN ABOUT DOING FOUR SHOWS A WEEK [ LAUGHTER ]
EIGHT SHOWS A WEEK IS A LOT OF SHOWS A WEEK >> YEAH, BUT I'M HONESTLY,
JIMMY, HAVING THE TIME OF MY LIFE >> Jimmy: IT'S LIKE THE
BIGGEST -- IT'S MORE -- IT'S LIKE, BIGGER THAN "HAMILTON" AND, I DON'T KNOW, "CATS," OR
WHATEVER'S GOING ON OUT THERE, ALL COMBINED, RIGHT? IT'S A HUGE THING.
IT'S LIKE -- IT'S REALLY - >> LISTEN, WE'RE JUST HAVING THE BEST TIME.
THE THEATRE, THE WINTER GARDEN THEATRE, IS JUST FILLED WITH JOY.
YOU FEEL THE AUDIENCE -- THE SHOW IS FILLED WITH JOY, BUT YOU JUST FEEL THEM BEING
HAPPY TO BE BACK, OH MY GOD. >> Jimmy: IT'S ALSO FILLED WITH SOME ITEMS THAT WERE GIFTED TO
YOU BY A FELLOW ACTOR. >> YEAH, OPENING NIGHT GIFTS ARE BIG ON BROADWAY.
AND SO YOU WALK IN, THERE'S FLOWERS, THERE'S CARDS AND, OF COURSE, RIGHT IN MY
MAKEUP, WHERE I PUT MY MAKEUP IN THE MIRROR, THERE WAS THIS. >> Jimmy: THIS PHOTOGRAPH SENT
TO YOU BY? >> RYAN REYNOLDS >> Jimmy: RYAN REYNOLDS.
[ LAUGHTER ] [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE THE NOTE
>> A LITTLE NOTE >> Jimmy: HE'LL BE -- "I'LL BE WATCHING."
SOMEWHAT OMINOUS >> I WAS TAKING THAT IN. AND I THOUGHT -- I GOT UP FROM
MY SEAT, I WAS LAUGHING. AND I WENT OVER TO BRUSH MY TEETH BEHIND ME -- THERE'S
ANOTHER MIRROR BEHIND ME AND -- THANK YOU, RYAN REYNOLDS >> Jimmy: AND HE SENT YOU THIS
TOO. [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE IS THAT AN ORIGINAL?
[ LAUGHTER ] >> I JUST -- HE FOLLOWS ME WHEREVER I GO.
>> Jimmy: THIS SHOULD BE HANGING IN A MUSEUM IN HALIFAX OR SOMETHING
[ LAUGHTER ] THAT IS QUITE -- WELL, THAT IS QUITE BEAUTIFUL.
>> I AM WORKING WITH, I MEAN -- SUTTON FOSTER, I THINK, IS THE GREATEST IN THE WORLD AT WHAT
SHE DOES, WHICH IS SEEMINGLY EVERYTHING [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE
>> Jimmy: I AGREE. I TOTALLY AGREE. >> JEFFERSON MAYS,
JAYNE HOUDYSHELL, SHULER HENSLEY, MARIE MULLEN. IT IS -- IT'S LIKE EIGHT TIMES
A WEEK - >> Jimmy: DID YOU SAY SHERMAN HEMSLEY?
>> SHULER HENSLEY. >> Jimmy: OH, OKAY I WAS LIKE, "WOW."
>> BY THE WAY, 6'6", AND HE WILL KILL YOU. [ LAUGHTER ]
BUT IT'S LIKE GOING -- EVERY NIGHT I GO TO LIKE AN ALL-STAR GAME WHERE PEOPLE ARE ACTUALLY
TRYING IT'S REALLY INCREDIBLE [ LAUGHTER ]
>> Jimmy: YEAH >> YOU KNOW. >> Jimmy: YOU HAVE ALMOST TOO
MUCH TALENT, I FEEL LIKE I FEEL LIKE SOME OF YOUR TALENT SHOULD BE SPREAD AROUND TO
OTHERS YOU KNOW >> IS RYAN REYNOLDS WATCHING
THIS, BY THE WAY [ LAUGHTER ] >> Jimmy: IF HE HEARS HIS
PICTURE'S ON IT, HE'LL BE WATCHING, THAT'S FOR SURE. [ LAUGHTER ]
>> BUT, NO, I'M LOVING IT, MY ENERGY FEELS GOOD. >> Jimmy: DOES IT?
'CAUSE - >> YEAH, NO, I DO. I DON'T KNOW WHY I HAVEN'T DONE
A FULL MUSICAL FOR 18 YEARS. AND EVERYONE WAS LIKE, EVEN DEB WAS LIKE, "BABE, ARE YOU GOING
TO BE OKAY?" AND I SAID, "WHAT? I'M GOING TO BE FINE."
THERE'S ONLY ONE THING WHERE I'M STRUGGLING A LITTLE BIT -- >> Jimmy: WHAT IS THAT
>> -- YOU KNOW MY AGE, IS MY BLADDER. I'M GOING TO BE -- I'M JUST
GOING TO BE HONEST [ LAUGHTER ] >> Jimmy: OH
IS IT OVERACTIVE >> APPARENTLY. I MEAN, NOT RIGHT NOW, DON'T
WORRY. WHY? YOU DON'T CARE, THIS IS
JIMMY FALLON'S [ LAUGHTER ] [ APPLAUSE ]
THE OPENING SCENE -- SO, LET ME GIVE YOU A LITTLE BIT OF CONTEXT
'CAUSE THIS IS A THREE-HOUR SHOW, RIGHT? [ LAUGHTER ]
>> Jimmy: SURE >> I DID ONCE PEE MY PANTS ON STAGE WHEN I WAS 26.
YOU KNOW, I DRANK TOO MUCH WATER. YOU KNOW, IT'S A LONG STORY.
EMBARRASSING SO FROM THAT MOMENT ON, I CANNOT HEAR THE WORDS "LADIES
AND GENTLEMEN, THIS IS YOUR FIVE-MINUTE CALL" WITHOUT NEEDING TO GO TO THE BATHROOM.
SO I GO RELIGIOUSLY, FIVE MINUTES BEFORE THE SHOW, I GO. BUT THE OPENING NUMBER OF "THE
MUSIC MAN" IF YOU'VE EVER SEEN IT IS ON A TRAIN I DON'T SAY A WORD, I SIT
THERE, I HIDE BEHIND A A NEWSPAPER, SPOILER ALERT I'M HIDING BEHIND IT, AND
LITERALLY BOUNCE LIKE THIS >> Jimmy: AS IF THE TRAIN'S GOING.
>> FOR FIVE MINUTES. AND I START, AND I'M LIKE, "OH, I'VE GOT TO GO, I'VE REALLY GOT
TO GO. [ LAUGHTER ] AND WHEN THAT THOUGHT GETS IN
THERE, IT DOES NOT LEAVE, LET ME TELL YOU. >> Jimmy: YEAH
>> THE LAST THING YOU WANT TO DO IS A BIG SONG AND DANCE NUMBER, WHICH IS MY FIRST
NUMBER, WHEN YOU NEED TO PEE >> Jimmy: WOW. >> SO, FOR PEOPLE COMING TO THE
SHOW, 'CAUSE YOU SEEM TO WATCH >> Jimmy: WOW, THE STARS REALLY ARE JUST LIKE US, YOU KNOW
[ LAUGHTER ] WELL, I KNOW YOU HAVE TO GO DO A SHOW TONIGHT
CAN YOU STICK AROUND AND PLAY "BOX OF LIES"? >> I'M IN.
LET'S DO IT. >> Jimmy: ALL RIGHT, HUGH JACKMAN IS HERE
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE "THE MUSIC MAN" IS ON BROADWAY NOW.
WE'LL BE BACK TO PLAY "BOX OF LIES." [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE
* >> Jimmy: WELCOME BACK TO "THE TONIGHT SHOW."
BRIDGET EVERETT AND MUSIC FROM RED HOT CHILI PEPPERS IS ON THE WAY.
BUT FIRST, IT'S TIME TO PLAY "BOX OF LIES." [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE
THE GAME -- IF YOU DON'T KNOW, IT WORKS LIKE THIS WE HAVE NINE MYSTERY BOXES
CONTAINING WHO KNOWS WHAT. THESE ARE MYSTERY ITEMS IN THE MYSTERY BOXES.
HUGH WILL PICK A BOX HE WILL REMOVE THE OBJECT AND DESCRIBE IT TO HIS OPPONENT,
WHICH IS ME, AND THEN I HAVE TO GUESS IF HUGH IS LYING OR TELLING THE TRUTH ABOUT WHAT'S
IN THE BOX, AND BASED ON YOUR CUSTOMS STORY, IT SEEMS LIKE I SHOULD WIN THIS PRETTY EASILY.
[ LAUGHTER ] >> JUST TAKE IT NOW, TAKE IT NOW.
>> Jimmy: AND WE'LL PLAY TWO ROUNDS LOSER HAS TO EAT A RAT, OKAY
>> HEY AWESOME. >> Jimmy: ALL RIGHT, HERE WE
GO YOU PICK FIRST, YOU'RE THE GUEST, GO CRAZY.
>> ALL RIGHT, LET'S GO FOR IT. ONE, TWO, OR THREE >> Audience: THREE
>> THREE THREE IT IS. I HEARD THREE.
[ LAUGHTER ] >> Jimmy: PEOPLE ARE -- REALLY HAVE A STRONG OPINION ON A
A NUMBER >> YEAH, AND WHILE I -- WHILE I'M PULLING THIS OUT, I KNOW
WE'RE PLAYING A GAME, BUT AMIR, QUESTLOVE, THAT MOVIE, "SUMMER OF SOUL," YOU HAVE TO SEE IT,
WON THE OSCAR FOR BEST DOCUMENTARY. [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE
>> Questlove: THANK YOU. >> OH, HO, OOH, YES, I LIKE IT OH, I REALLY LIKE IT
>> Jimmy: OKAY >> YEAH. >> Jimmy: YOU CAN KEEP IT,
PROBABLY >> YOU KNOW WHAT I'M NOT GOING TO KEEP THIS ONE
>> Jimmy: OH >> THIS IS KIND OF -- YEAH >> Jimmy: OKAY
>> THIS COULD SCARE SMALL CHILDREN ALL RIGHT.
SO -- WOW. SO IT'S JELLY, LIKE A JELLY MOLD, CIRCULAR JELLY
AND INSIDE IT -- I'M PRESUMING IS FAKE POO. [ LAUGHTER ]
>> Jimmy: OH, INTERESTING. NOW, I'M GOING TO SAY -- NOT NECESSARILY BASED ON YOUR
DELIVERY, BUT -- BASED ON THE FACT THAT THAT WOULD BE AN EXCEPTIONALLY
DISGUSTING THING TO PUT IN A A BOX, THAT YOU, HUGH JACKMAN, ARE LYING.
>> YOU'RE ACCUSING ME OF LYING DAMMIT I'M REALLY BAD AT LYING!
DAMMIT * [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE
>> Jimmy: WHAT DO WE HAVE HERE OH, A LITTLE DIORAMA >> AND THAT, BY THE WAY, I AM
KEEPING, THAT IS - >> Jimmy: OH, LOOK AT THAT, YEAH, WOW.
LOOK AT THAT >> THAT IS SO GOOD >> Jimmy: YOU'RE ABOUT TO KILL
PROFESSOR X. THAT DOESN'T SEEM IN KEEPING WITH THE CANON OF THE --
>> REAL NICE CLOSE SHAVE >> Jimmy: I DON'T KNOW WHAT WE DO WITH THESE NOW.
>> I DON'T KNOW WHAT WE DO EITHER >> Jimmy: ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT
NOW IT'S TIME FOR ME TO PICK A A BOX. >> CAN I KEEP THIS, BY THE WAY
>> Jimmy: I AM GOING TO TAKE NUMBER - >> Audience: FIVE!
>> Jimmy: YOUR OPINIONS ARE NOT WELCOME. [ LAUGHTER ]
I'M GOING NUMBER SIX BECAUSE IT'S THE CLOSEST ONE ALL RIGHT?
>> ALL RIGHT >> Jimmy: ALL RIGHT. ALL RIGHT.
OKAY ALL RIGHT. THIS IS -- SHOW IT TO THE
AUDIENCE -- THIS IS A CAKE WITH SHRIMP COCKTAIL ON TOP OF IT, AND IT SAYS "HAPPY BIRTHDAY
OTTO VON BISMARCK" ON IT [ LAUGHTER ] >> IT'S JUST -- IT'S JUST WAY
TOO GOOD TO BE TRUE. THAT'S WAY TOO GOOD TO BE TRUE AND I HAVE A FUNNY FEELING,
JIMMY, THAT YOU MAY WANT TO SHOW THAT YOU'RE A BETTER LIAR THAN ME.
THAT'S JUST MY GUT >> Jimmy: WHY WOULD ANYONE WANT TO SHOW THAT
IN FACT -- >> EVERYBODY IS. >> Jimmy: IT'S SOMETHING I'D
KEEP QUIET, PROBABLY [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] >> JIMMY, YOU'RE LYING
I KNOW YOU'RE LYING. >> Jimmy: I WOULD NEVER LIE TO YOU, HUGH JACKMAN.
* IN FACT -- >> WHAT?
>> Jimmy: I KNOW, IT'S WEIRD, RIGHT? [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE
>> IS THAT GAME OVER >> Jimmy: I THINK THE GAME'S OVER
>> IS THAT GAME OVER >> Jimmy: AND GUESS WHAT, I THINK I WON.
>> I TOLD YOU, I'M THE WORST LIAR *
I CAN'T EVEN SPOT A LIE. >> Jimmy: YOU'VE GOT A SHOW TO GO DO.
HUGH JACKMAN IS IN "THE MUSIC MAN. YOU WILL NEVER GET TICKETS TO
THIS, SO FORGET ABOUT IT BUT ON THE OFF CHANCE YOU DO, IT'S AT THE WINTER GARDEN
THEATRE. >> AND IF YOU COME, I WANT YOU TO KNOW, SOMEWHERE ON THE
STAGE, THIS WILL BE THERE, AND I'M NOT LYING. >> Jimmy: OH, THAT'S WONDERFUL
>> SOMEWHERE [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE >> Jimmy: AND HUGH, I'M GOING
TO TELL YOU THAT WE -- WE'RE GOING TO SEND THIS TO RYAN REYNOLDS FOR HIS HOUSE.
>> THANK YOU SO MUCH >> Jimmy: HUGH JACKMAN, EVERYBODY!
WE'LL BE BACK WITH BRIDGET EVERETT! [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE
* >> Jimmy: WE'RE BACK OUR NEXT GUEST IS
A MULTI-TALENTED ACTRESS, COMEDIAN, AND STAR OF "THE CABARET.
SHE HAS HER VERY OWN SHOW CALLED "SOMEBODY SOMEWHERE."
PRETTY BIG FOR ME. >> OH, REALLY? YOU HAVE, LIKE, A SATURDAY
RITUAL >> I DO. >> OH.
>> I LIKE TO SIT DOWN AND WRITE OUT A LIST OF GOALS FOR THE WEEK
AND OF COURSE I WRITE DOWN A A LIST OF ACCOMPLISHMENTS FOR THE PREVIOUS WEEK AND STUFF
LIKE THAT. >> OH, GOD, THAT'S SO AMAZING. >> YEAH.
>> I DON'T DO ANY OF THAT. I LIKE TO LAY AROUND DRINKING WINE IN MY UNDERWEAR
>> OH. >> IT'S PRETTY [ BLEEP ] GREAT >> Jimmy: ALL EPISODES OF
"SOMEBODY SOMEWHERE" ON HBO NOW. PLEASE WELCOME BRIDGET EVERETT
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE >> OH, OH!
I KNOW EVERYBODY'S SAYING IT CONGRATULATIONS, I'M SO HAPPY FOR YOU.
BEST MOVIE OF THE YEAR OKAY, I'LL STOP. >> Jimmy: NO, THAT'S ALL RIGHT,
IT'S WELL DESERVED >> IT'S GREAT TO MEET YOU. >> Jimmy: IT IS A GREAT MOVIE.
AND I'M GLAD EVERYBODY'S BRINGING IT UP, BECAUSE, YOU KNOW, QUESTLOVE KIND OF GOT
CHEATED OUT OF SOME ATTENTION THERE AT THE OSCARS. >> I KNOW.
IT'S LIKE, I THOUGHT THAT WAS GOING TO BE -- WELL, IT WAS A PRETTY MEMORABLE MOMENT FOR
A LOT OF REASONS, BUT -- >> Jimmy: IT WAS INDEED. >> SO I'M SO HAPPY FOR YOU
AND IT'S SO GREAT TO MEET YOU. >> Jimmy: AND WE ARE HAPPY FOR YOU.
AND I THINK I SPEAK FOR QUESTLOVE WHEN I SAY THAT, BECAUSE YOUR SHOW IS, FIRST OF
ALL, JUST PICKED UP FOR A SECOND SEASON. >> THAT'S CORRECT.
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE * >> Jimmy: A REALLY GREAT SHOW.
>> THANK YOU >> Jimmy: FUNNY AND MOVING AND ALL OF THOSE THINGS YOU WOULD
WANT FROM A SHOW AND YOU -- THE SHOW IS SET, FOR THOSE WHO DON'T KNOW, IN YOUR
ACTUAL HOMETOWN -- >> YEAH. >> Jimmy: -- MANHATTAN, KANSAS
DID YOU SHOOT IT IN YOUR HOMETOWN >> WE SHOT A LITTLE BIT THERE.
WE SHOT SOME OUTSIDE OF CHICAGO, BUT IT'S MANHATTAN, KANSAS, THE LITTLE
APPLE. IF YOU HAVEN'T BEEN, YOU'VE GOT TO GO.
>> Jimmy: THE LITTLE APPLE >> STOP BY VARSITY DONUTS, IT'S A REALLY GOOD TIME
>> Jimmy: DO THEY JUST CALL IT THE LITTLE APPLE OR IS THERE SOME REPRESENTATION OF THE -
>> OH, IT'S CALLED THAT. THERE'S, LIKE, YOU KNOW, LIKE A BIG WATER TOWER WITH AN APPLE
ON IT. AND THERE'S LIKE LITTLE APPLE BREWERY, LITTLE APPLE THIS,
LITTLE APPLE THAT. SO - >> Jimmy: AND WHAT COLLEGE IS
IN MANHATTAN, KANSAS >> KANSAS STATE -- >> Jimmy: KANSAS STATE, BUT YOU
DIDN'T - >> POWER CATS. >> YOU DID NOT GO TO KANSAS
STATE. >> NO, I WENT TO ARIZONA STATE >> Jimmy: I WENT TO ARIZONA
STATE TOO. >> THAT'S WHAT I HEARD >> Jimmy: YEAH, I DON'T KNOW IF
WE OVERLAPPED AT ALL I DIDN'T ACTUALLY GO TO CLASS, SO THAT WOULD --
>> I BARELY DID, BUT I STUDIED OPERA WERE YOU - >> Jimmy: SAME HERE.
[ LAUGHTER ] >> Jimmy: WHAT WERE YOU UP TO WHEN YOU WERE THERE?
WHAT WERE YOU DOING, LIKE, SOCIALLY >> OH, GOD
>> Jimmy: WHERE DID YOU HANG OUT? >> THE DASH.
>> Jimmy: THE DASH WAS A BIG PLACE THEN, YEAH >> AND THEN WHATABURGER ON THE
WAY HOME AND THAT WAS PRETTY MUCH IT. [ LAUGHTER ]
>> Jimmy: I LEARNED -- I LEARNED A SPECIAL SKILL AT THE DASH, WHICH WAS THAT YOU DON'T
NEED A GLASS TO DRINK BEER OUT OF, YOU CAN JUST DRINK IT RIGHT OUT OF THE PITCHER
>> THAT'S RIGHT, THAT'S RIGHT. AND AS A MATTER OF FACT, I USED TO BE ON THE SWIM TEAM, FOR
LIKE ONE YEAR, BUT YOU WOULD DRINK A WHOLE PITCHER OF BEER AND THEN YOUR ALARM WOULD GO
OFF AT, LIKE, 5:00 IN THE MORNING AND YOU'D THROW UP IN THE GUTTER, SO -- ANYWAY
[ LAUGHTER ] IT WAS A DIFFERENT TIME. >> Jimmy: YOU --
>> NOW I JUST, YOU KNOW, THROW UP ANYWHERE. YOU KNOW
>> Jimmy: YOU BROUGHT A VIDEO FOR US OF YOUR MOTHER. >> OH, YEAH.
>> Jimmy: WHO IS AN INTERESTING WOMAN. >> YEAH.
>> Jimmy: I THINK MAYBE WE SHOULD SHOW THE VIDEO FIRST AND THEN -
>> LET'S GET TO KNOW HER A A LITTLE BIT >> Jimmy: TALK ABOUT -- YEAH,
SURE
[ LAUGHTER ]
>> WHAT WAS A TEENY-TINY PENIS >> HE HAD A LITTLE [ BLEEP >> WHO
>> YOUR FATHER [ LAUGHTER ] BUT HE USED IT PLENTY, BELIEVE
ME >> WITH WHO? >> WITH ANYBODY HE COULD GET IT
IN [ LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE >> Jimmy: SO YOUR OLD -- SO
YOUR MOM IS NOT THE SHY AND RESERVED TYPE IS WHAT I'M GUESSING
>> OH, NO, NO, NO, NO, NO. WE USED TO GO TO FOOD 4 LESS, WHICH WAS A GROCERY STORE AT
THE TIME >> Jimmy: YEAH, IT STILL IS. >> YEAH.
AND SHE WOULD GO IN, LIKE, HER NIGHTGOWN, BUT, LIKE, JUST PAPER THIN
IT'D BE LIKE FROM THE '70s AND WE'RE IN THE LATE '80s BY NOW.
AND SHE HAD THESE LONG, LOW HANGING BOOBS, WE CALLED HER BEAVER TAILS, AND SHE WOULD
JUST WALK THROUGH. [ LAUGHTER ] JUST DIDN'T GIVE A -
SHE DID NOT CARE BUT I THINK, YOU KNOW, IN SOME WAYS, THAT'S KIND OF WHAT
BROUGHT ME TO THIS MOMENT RIGHT NOW. >> Jimmy: OH, IT'S INSPIRATION
YEAH. [ LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE >> I'M GETTING HOT, JIMMY. I'M GETTING HOT.
NO, I MEAN, IF YOU SEE THESE WITHOUT THIS - SOMEBODY MAKE A GOOD PLUS SIZE
BRA, BECAUSE IF I TOOK THIS THING OFF, THEY'D BE ROLLING AROUND MY KNEES AND WE'D BE --
I'D BE LIKE MOTHER, LIKE DAUGHTER RIGHT NOW [ LAUGHTER ]
FIX THIS IN POST CUT THIS WHOLE INTERVIEW [ LAUGHTER ]
>> Jimmy: YOU'RE - >> HI GUYS >> Jimmy: DID YOU STAY IN
PHOENIX AFTER COLLEGE OR DID YOU GO BACK HOME >> I DID
I STAYED IN ARIZONA FOR A WHILE. I WAS KNOCKING AROUND KARAOKE
BARS AND I WAS WAITING TABLES AT P.F. CHANG'S, THE ORIGINAL ONE, THANK YOU SO MUCH
>> Jimmy: OH, THE ORIGINAL [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE SO MUCH HISTORY.
>> IT WAS A REAL HOT SPOT FOR, LIKE, SPORTS CELEBRITIES LIKE -
>> OH, REALLY? LIKE WHO >> WELL, YOU'VE GOT YOUR -- OH,
YOU KNOW, YOUR CHARLES BARKLEY, OF COURSE. >> Jimmy: OH, HE PLAYED FOR THE
SUNS, RIGHT? YEAH, RIGHT. >> THE SUNS.
HE WAS HUGE AT THE TIME. AND HE BROUGHT IN -- EVERYBODY BROUGHT IN LIKE -- ONE NIGHT I
WAS WAITING ON HIM AND MICHAEL JORDAN AND PAYNE STEWART, AND AHMAD RASHAD
AND ALL THESE PEOPLE BUT ONE NIGHT, HE BROUGHT IN THE NATURE BOY, RIC FLAIR.
>> Jimmy: THE WRESTLER, THE GREAT WRESTLER >> WHOO!
ANYBODY -- OKAY. [ LAUGHTER ] WHOO
>> Jimmy: SOMEONE WAS STILL HOLDING BACK TEARS, SO THERE WE GO
>> WELL, I'M HAPPY YOU'RE HERE ANYWAY, THE NATURE BOY, I WAS SO EXCITED, BECAUSE, LIKE, I
GREW UP WITH HIM IN THE HOUSEHOLD. HE WAS LIKE, YOU KNOW, MY
BROTHERS USED TO WATCH WRESTLING AND LIKE BODY SLAM ME AND STUFF, IT WAS WONDERFUL.
>> Jimmy: HE HAS A BEAUTIFUL MANE OF BLOND HAIR >> YEAH, SHOW BIZ.
YOU KNOW, TOTAL WRESTLER LIKE WITH THE OUTFITS YOU'VE GOT TO LOOK HIM UP.
IF YOU DON'T KNOW THE NATURE BOY, RIC FLAIR, YOU'VE GOT TO LOOK HIM UP.
ANYWAY, I'M SORT OF GOING OFF -- >> Jimmy: WHAT DID NATURE BOY
LIKE TO EAT? >> WELL, NATURE BOY -- OH, I DON'T KNOW WHAT HE GOT UP
TO BUT I DO KNOW -- CHARLES BARKLEY WAS MY REGULAR,
SO HE ATE THE POT STICKERS HE GOT THOSE >> Jimmy: OH, CHARLES LIKED THE
POT STICKERS >> YEAH, YEAH. >> Jimmy: WAS CHARLES A GOOD
TIPPER >> CHARLES WAS A VERY CONSISTENT GOOD TIPPER
>> Jimmy: OH YEAH. >> YEAH, AND THERE WAS A WHOLE RANGE WITH SOME OF THOSE SPORTS
STARS, BUT YEAH, HE WAS ALWAYS A GOOD TIPPER. >> Jimmy: OH, SO SOME OF THEM
STIFFED YOU, HUH >> NO, NO, NO, NO, NO, BUT HE WAS GOOD
AND THEN -- BUT ALSO, HE WOULD HAVE ME SING SOMETIMES BECAUSE IF YOU DIDN'T KNOW, I'M
A SINGER >> Jimmy: RIGHT. >> YOU CAN LOOK IT UP ON
YOUTUBE, IT'S EVERYWHERE >> Jimmy: SO YOU KNEW HIM REALLY WELL?
>> WELL, ENOUGH. YOU KNOW, IT WAS KIND OF LIKE -- LET ME JUST HAVE A
A LITTLE SIP OF WATER. >> Jimmy: YEAH, GO AHEAD, ENJOY, GO CRAZY.
>> YOU'VE GOT TO STAY HYDRATED, IT'S FLU SEASON. [ LAUGHTER ]
ANYWAY, MY POINT WAS THAT HE BROUGHT IN NATURE BOY RIC FLAIR AND I WAS SO FREAKED OUT,
BECAUSE, LIKE, TO ME, LIKE, HE WAS LIKE -- THAT WAS LIKE A MOVIE STAR, YOU KNOW, IN THE
FLESH AND -- >> Jimmy: YEAH >> AND HE'S LIKE, "DO YOU WANT
SING FOR HIM?" I WAS LIKE, "I DON'T KNOW. AND THEN SO I JUST -- HE'S
LIKE, "COME ON, SING FOR HIM," BUT I WAS SCARED, SO I SAT ON CHARLES BARKLEY'S LAP AND SANG
AND SORT OF WITH MY HEAD, LIKE, SORT OF BURIED IN HIS NECK, AND I SANG "I'VE GOT A CRUSH ON
YOU" TO THE NATURE BOY RIC FLAIR JUST ONE CHAIR OVER. [ LAUGHTER ]
AND I DOUBT EITHER ONE OF THEM REMEMBER THAT, BUT IT WAS ONE OF THE BEST MOMENTS OF MY LIFE
[ APPLAUSE ] >> Jimmy: IT'S A PRETTY GOOD LIFE MOMENT.
>> YEAH. >> Jimmy: WELL, IT'S GREAT TO HAVE YOU HERE.
>> THANK YOU >> Jimmy: THE SHOW, IF YOU HAVEN'T SEEN IT, IT'S GREAT.
IT'S CALLED "SOMEBODY SOMEWHERE. IT'S ON HBO AND HBO MAX.
BRIDGET EVERETT, EVERYBODY THANK YOU, BRIDGET WE'LL BE BACK WITH RED HOT
CHILI PEPPERS. [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE *
>> Jimmy: WELL, IF YOU WEREN'T CONFUSED ALREADY, YOU'RE ABOUT TO SEE ONE BAND PLAY IN TWO
CITIES AT THE SAME TIME. HERE WITH THE SONG "BLACK SUMMER" FROM THEIR
HIGHLY ANTICIPATED AND CRITICALLY ACCLAIMED NEW ALBUM "UNLIMITED LOVE," RED HOT CHILI
PEPPERS!
* A LAZY RAIN AM I *
* THE SKIES REFUSE TO CRY * * CREMATION TAKES ITS PIECE OF YOUR SUPPLY *
* THE NIGHT IS DRESSED LIKE NOON A SAILOR SPOKE TOO SOON *
* AND CHINA'S O THE DARK SIDE OF THE MOON * *
* PLATYPUS ARE A FE THE SECRET LIFE OF ROO * * A PERSONALITY I NEVER KNE
GET IT ON * * MY GRETA WEIGHS A TON THE ARCHERS ON THE RUN *
* AND NO ONE STANDS ALONE BEHIND THE SUN * * IT'S BEEN A LONG TIME
SINCE I MADE A NEW FRIEND * * WAITIN' ON ANOTHE BLACK SUMMER TO END *
* IT'S BEEN A LONG TIME AND YOU NEVER KNOW WHEN * * WAITIN' ON ANOTHE
BLACK SUMMER TO END * *
* A-SAILING O A CENSORSHIP *
* RIDING ON A HEADLESS HORS TO MAKE THE TRIP * * BEEN A LONG TIM
SINCE I MADE A NEW FRIEND * * WAITIN' ON ANOTHE BLACK SUMMER TO END *
* IT'S BEEN A LONG TIME AND YOU NEVER KNOW WHEN * * WAITIN' ON ANOTHE
BLACK SUMMER TO END * * * I BEEN WAITIN
I BEEN WAITIN' * * WAITIN' ON ANOTHE BLACK SUMMER TO END *
* I BEEN WAITIN I BEEN WAITIN' * * WAITIN ON ANOTHER
BLACK SUMMER TO END * * I BEEN WAITIN I BEEN WAITIN *
* WAITIN ON ANOTHER BLACK SUMMER TO END * [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE
>> Jimmy: ALL RIGHT. THAT'S THE ALBUM RED HOT CHILI PEPPERS,
"UNLIMITED LOVE" IS OUT NOW. I WANT TO THANK HUGH JACKMAN, BRIDGET EVERETT, RED HOT CHILI
PEPPERS, THE ROOTS I WANNA THANK JIMMY FALLON, JAMIE, EVERYBODY HERE AT "THE
TONIGHT SHOW." THANK YOU FOR BEING SO WARM AND WELCOMING AND THANK YOU FOR THE
PIZZA. I'M SO SORRY I'M SO SORRY
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE I APOLOGIZE TO EACH AND EVERY ONE OF YOU
I'M TERRIBLY SORRY THANKS FOR WATCHING. APOLOGIES TO MATT DAMON, WE RAN
OUT OF TIME FOR HIM. * "LATE NIGHT WITH SETH MEYERS"
IS NEXT. [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE *
*