1 00:00:11,044 --> 00:00:14,848 >> Steve: FROM STUDIO 6B IN ROCKEFELLER CENTER IN THE HEART 2 00:00:14,848 --> 00:00:20,020 OF NEW YORK CITY, IT'S "THE TONIGHT SHOW STARRING JIMMY FALLON." 3 00:00:20,020 --> 00:00:22,989 TONIGHT, JOIN JIMMY AND HIS GUESTS - MARISA TOMEI 4 00:00:22,989 --> 00:00:27,861 JON GLASER MUSICAL GUEST MAE MULLER AND FEATURING THE LEGENDARY 5 00:00:27,861 --> 00:00:35,602 ROOTS CREW >> Questlove: AAH! >> Steve: AND NOW, HERE HE IS, 6 00:00:35,602 --> 00:00:38,471 >> Steve: AND NOW, HERE HE IS, JIMMY FALLON 7 00:00:43,176 --> 00:00:51,651 * 8 00:00:51,651 --> 00:01:02,062 * [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE >> Jimmy: OH, MY GOODNESS. 9 00:01:02,062 --> 00:01:05,065 THAT IS AMAZING. I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU 10 00:01:05,065 --> 00:01:07,701 ENJOY. WELCOME, EVERYBODY WOW, WELCOME TO "THE TONIGHT 11 00:01:07,701 --> 00:01:09,536 SHOW." THANK YOU VERY MUCH. THAT WAS - 12 00:01:09,536 --> 00:01:15,709 [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE WOW. THAT APPLAUSE LASTED LONGER 13 00:01:15,709 --> 00:01:21,715 THAN TOM BRADY'S RETIREMENT. [ LAUGHTER ] THAT'S RIGHT, YESTERDAY, 14 00:01:21,715 --> 00:01:23,416 TOM BRADY CALLED OFF HIS RETIREMENT AND ANNOUNCED THAT HE WILL RETURN NEXT SEASON TO 15 00:01:23,416 --> 00:01:29,155 PLAY FOR THE TAMPA BAY BUCCANEERS THAT'S RIGHT 16 00:01:29,155 --> 00:01:35,995 [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE THAT'S RIGHT BASICALLY, BRADY SAW GAS PRICES 17 00:01:35,995 --> 00:01:42,702 AND SAID, "BACK TO WORK. HERE WE GO." [ LAUGHTER ] 18 00:01:42,702 --> 00:01:44,571 THAT'S RIGHT, TOM BRADY IS BACK, AND ONCE AGAIN HE MADE HISTORY AS THE FIRST PERSON TO 19 00:01:44,571 --> 00:01:47,741 EVER MOVE TO FLORIDA AND UN-RETIRE. [ LAUGHTER ] 20 00:01:47,741 --> 00:01:51,411 BRADY'S RETIREMENT LASTED 40 DAYS. IN OTHER WORDS, HE PRETTY MUCH 21 00:01:51,411 --> 00:01:57,384 GAVE UP FOOTBALL FOR LENT. [ LAUGHTER ] YEAH, HE WAS ONLY RETIRED FOR 22 00:01:57,384 --> 00:02:00,720 SIX WEEKS. HIS KIDS WERE LIKE, "IS IT SOMETHING WE SAID? 23 00:02:00,720 --> 00:02:03,690 [ LAUGHTER ] I HAVE A FEELING BRADY'S GOING TO BE LIKE ONE OF THOSE BANDS 24 00:02:03,690 --> 00:02:10,296 THAT KEEP GOING ON THEIR FAREWELL TOUR. "THIS IS OUR LAST TOUR THIS 25 00:02:10,296 --> 00:02:11,965 YEAR." EVERYONE'S PUMPED THAT BRADY'S BACK 26 00:02:11,965 --> 00:02:12,832 WELL, EXCEPT FOR MAYBE THIS GUY. 27 00:02:14,901 --> 00:02:16,770 HIS RETURN, AN AUCTION TOOK PLACE FOR THE FOOTBALL HE USED TO THROW HIS FINAL TOUCHDOWN 28 00:02:16,770 --> 00:02:27,480 PASS THE WINNING BID WAS MORE THAN $500,000 29 00:02:27,480 --> 00:02:30,817 >> Jimmy: THE AUCTIONEER WAS LIKE, "SOLD TO THE GUY WITH REALLY BAD TIMING. 30 00:02:30,817 --> 00:02:36,156 THERE YOU GO, YOU GOT IT." [ LAUGHTER ] YEAH, IT WENT FROM TOM BRADY'S 31 00:02:36,156 --> 00:02:42,095 LAST TOUCHDOWN BALL TO A BALL. [ LAUGHTER ] IN OTHER SPORTS NEWS, MARCH 32 00:02:42,095 --> 00:02:53,340 MADNESS HAS OFFICIALLY BEGUN [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE MARCH MADNESS. 33 00:02:53,340 --> 00:02:55,175 PEOPLE ALSO CALL IT THE BIG DANCE, THE ROAD TO THE FINAL FOUR, AND ADULTS YELLING AT 34 00:02:55,175 --> 00:02:58,812 COLLEGE KIDS THEY DON'T KNOW YOU KNOW YEAH, I SAW THAT YALE MADE IT 35 00:02:58,812 --> 00:03:04,551 TO THE TOURNAMENT THIS YEAR, BUT ONLY BECAUSE THEIR DAD MADE A PHONE CALL 36 00:03:04,551 --> 00:03:10,724 [ LAUGHTER ] WELL, SWITCHING GEARS, UBER JUST ANNOUNCED THAT CUSTOMERS 37 00:03:10,724 --> 00:03:13,259 WILL PAY AN ADDITIONAL CHARGE TO HELP ITS DRIVERS OFFSET HIGH GAS PRICES 38 00:03:13,259 --> 00:03:18,365 YEAH, UBER IS ADDING A A SURCHARGE FOR GAS. YOU KNOW IT'S BAD WHEN THE 39 00:03:18,365 --> 00:03:22,168 DRIVER SHOWS UP ON FOOT AND SAYS, "LET'S TAKE YOUR CAR [ LAUGHTER ] 40 00:03:22,168 --> 00:03:28,775 THAT'S A NICE ONE. YEP, THINGS ARE ROUGH. NOW IF YOU WANT HEAT OR AC, THE 41 00:03:28,775 --> 00:03:36,616 DRIVER JUST BLOWS ON YOU [ LAUGHTER ] SOME MORE BUSINESS NEWS. 42 00:03:36,616 --> 00:03:41,187 I READ THAT DUE TO INFLATION, DORITOS HAS BEEN PUTTING FIVE FEWER CHIPS IN EACH BAG. 43 00:03:41,187 --> 00:03:43,356 [ LAUGHTER ] AND IF YOU NOTICE THE CHANGE, YOU'VE GOT BIGGER PROBLEMS THAN 44 00:03:43,356 --> 00:03:48,495 INFLATION. [ LAUGHTER ] "W-W-WHAT? 45 00:03:48,495 --> 00:03:52,799 NORMALLY THERE'S 48 CHIPS IN THE BAG. >> Steve: "I'VE BEEN ROBBED! 46 00:03:52,799 --> 00:04:01,641 >> Jimmy: "I'M ONLY COUNTING 43. >> Steve: MOTHER!" 47 00:04:01,641 --> 00:04:10,050 [ LAUGHTER ] >> Jimmy: EVEN WORSE, TODAY AT THE GROCERY STORE, I SAW THIS. 48 00:04:10,050 --> 00:04:12,052 ONE PRINGLE. [ LAUGHTER ] ONE -- 49 00:04:12,052 --> 00:04:14,954 >> Steve: IT JUST SAYS PRINGLE >> Jimmy: YEAH, PRINGLE. >> Steve: NOT PRINGLES 50 00:04:14,954 --> 00:04:18,591 >> Jimmy: YEAH, IT'S STILL HARD TO GET YOUR HAND IN THERE TOO. I DON'T KNOW WHY - 51 00:04:18,591 --> 00:04:20,927 [ LAUGHTER ] >> Steve: AND IT'S STILL BROKEN 52 00:04:20,927 --> 00:04:23,196 >> Jimmy: GET THIS TODAY APPLE RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT LETS YOU USE FACE ID TO 53 00:04:23,196 --> 00:04:28,335 UNLOCK YOUR PHONE WHILE WEARING A MASK >> Steve: OH 54 00:04:28,335 --> 00:04:31,137 >> Jimmy: EVEN THE GUY WHO BOUGHT TOM BRADY'S FOOTBALL WAS LIKE, "GREAT TIMING. 55 00:04:31,137 --> 00:04:36,476 [ LAUGHTER ] MEANWHILE, I SAW THAT THE TSA ISSUED A STATEMENT ASKING 56 00:04:36,476 --> 00:04:39,979 SPRING BREAK TRAVELERS TO BE RESPECTFUL [ LAUGHTER ] 57 00:04:39,979 --> 00:04:42,082 THEY TRIED PUTTING UP A SIGN, BUT SPRING BREAKERS IMMEDIATELY DREW A PENIS ON IT 58 00:04:42,082 --> 00:04:44,451 "AND THEY -- [ LAUGHTER ] ALL RIGHT. 59 00:04:44,451 --> 00:04:46,386 ALL RIGHT. WE GET IT. WE GET IT. 60 00:04:46,386 --> 00:04:52,826 WE GET IT. I HEARD ABOUT A MAN IN FLORIDA WHO WAS ARRESTED AFTER HE 61 00:04:52,826 --> 00:04:56,629 CALLED 911 TO CHECK IF THE METH THAT HE BOUGHT WAS AUTHENTIC [ LAUGHTER ] 62 00:04:56,629 --> 00:05:00,033 IN OTHER WORDS, SPRING BREAK HAS OFFICIALLY SPRUNG. IT'S HAPPENING 63 00:05:00,033 --> 00:05:07,407 IT'S SPRING BREAK. [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE THE GUY WAS SO EMBARRASSED, HE 64 00:05:07,407 --> 00:05:20,053 SENT HIS FRIENDS THIS EMOJI. [ LAUGHTER ] AND FINALLY, A WOMAN IN THE 65 00:05:20,053 --> 00:05:28,962 U.K. WHO JUST TURNED 102 SAYS SHE CREDITS HER GOOD HEALTH TO JAGERBOMBS, TEQUILA, AND PIZZA 66 00:05:28,962 --> 00:05:33,133 [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE YEP, THEN PRINCE CHARLES WAS LIKE, "OKAY, MUM, LET'S GET YOU 67 00:05:33,133 --> 00:05:35,468 TO BED, ALL RIGHT. WE HAVE A GREAT SHOW, EVERYONE GIVE IT UP FOR THE ROOTS 68 00:05:35,468 --> 00:05:35,502 WE HAVE A GREAT SHOW, EVERYONE GIVE IT UP FOR THE ROOTS 69 00:05:40,073 --> 00:05:57,624 [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE * 70 00:05:57,624 --> 00:06:02,562 >> Jimmy: IT IS MONDAY WE'RE EXCITED TO BE BACK WE HAVE A GREAT WEEK OF SHOWS 71 00:06:02,562 --> 00:06:06,132 AHEAD. SETH MEYERS WILL BE HERE AMY SCHUMER, BILLY CRYSTAL - 72 00:06:06,132 --> 00:06:11,938 [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE >> Steve: OH >> Jimmy: -- DANIEL RADCLIFFE 73 00:06:11,938 --> 00:06:15,408 WILL ALL BE JOINING US BUT FIRST, WHAT A SHOW WE HAVE FOR YOU TONIGHT. 74 00:06:15,408 --> 00:06:17,344 SHE STARS AS MAY PARKER IN ONE OF THE BIGGEST MOVIES OF ALL TIME, "SPIDER-MAN: NO WAY 75 00:06:17,344 --> 00:06:20,313 HOME," WHICH IS AVAILABLE ON DIGITAL TOMORROW MARISA TOMEI IS HERE TONIGHT 76 00:06:20,313 --> 00:06:31,391 [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE PLUS, YOU CAN SEE HIM IN AMY SCHUMER'S NEW SERIES "LIFE 77 00:06:31,391 --> 00:06:32,859 & BETH," WHICH APPEARS THIS FRIDAY ON HULU JON GLASER IS HERE 78 00:06:32,859 --> 00:06:39,332 [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ONE OF THE FUNNIEST DUDES. I LOVE THAT GUY. 79 00:06:39,332 --> 00:06:45,338 AND WE HAVE GREAT, GREAT, GREAT MUSIC. PERFORMING HER PLATINUM HIT 80 00:06:45,338 --> 00:06:47,073 SONG, "BETTER DAYS" WHICH HAS OVER 650 MILLION GLOBAL STREAMS -- 81 00:06:47,073 --> 00:06:51,077 >> Steve: OOH. >> Jimmy: MAE MULLER IS HERE [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE 82 00:06:51,077 --> 00:06:57,517 MAE MULLER CAN I PLAY IT? >> Steve: YEAH 83 00:06:57,517 --> 00:07:03,023 * >> Jimmy: STARTS LIKE, WHAT'S GOING ON 84 00:07:03,023 --> 00:07:08,828 * * I'VE BEEN FEELING LONEL I NEED SOMEONE 85 00:07:08,828 --> 00:07:11,097 TO HOLD ME * >> Jimmy: IT'S ALMOST LIKE I'M ON ROLLER SKATES 86 00:07:11,097 --> 00:07:13,900 IMAGINE IF I'M ON ROLLER SKATES THAT'S THE WAY I WOULD DO THAT 87 00:07:13,900 --> 00:07:17,637 * * I'VE BEEN FEELING JADED DON'T KNOW HOW 88 00:07:17,637 --> 00:07:20,173 I SHOULD PLAY IT * >> Steve: SKATING. >> Jimmy: WHAT'S THAT? 89 00:07:20,173 --> 00:07:23,276 >> Steve: YOU WERE SKATING >> Jimmy: YEAH, I WAS ROLLER SKATING, YEAH. 90 00:07:23,276 --> 00:07:29,582 [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE >> Questlove: WE WAS ROLLER SKATING BACKWARDS. 91 00:07:29,582 --> 00:07:31,785 >> Jimmy: WAIT, PLAY IT AGAIN, PLAY IT AGAIN. >> Steve: HE'S IN THE RINK 92 00:07:31,785 --> 00:07:36,122 * >> Jimmy: OH, WAIT, YOU'RE ROLLER SKATING BACKWARDS 93 00:07:36,122 --> 00:07:43,963 THAT'S HOW YOU DO IT [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE I'M LESS AWKWARD 94 00:07:43,963 --> 00:07:48,068 OH, WAIT, HE CAN'T SKATE SOMEONE HELP SOMEBODY HELP. 95 00:07:48,068 --> 00:07:50,136 HE'S ALL RIGHT SOMEBODY HELP. HE'S NOT GOOD ON SKATES. 96 00:07:50,136 --> 00:07:53,073 GUYS, HE CAN'T SKATE SORRY, BUDDY I GOT YOU, I GOT YOU 97 00:07:53,073 --> 00:07:55,442 [ LAUGHTER ] * JUST STAND THERE 98 00:07:55,442 --> 00:07:57,110 JUST STAND THERE ALL RIGHT. WE'LL GET -- JUST STAND THERE. 99 00:07:57,110 --> 00:07:59,779 JUST STAND RIGHT THERE THANK YOU FOR COMING TO MY PARTY. 100 00:07:59,779 --> 00:08:04,517 [ LAUGHTER ] * [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE 101 00:08:04,517 --> 00:08:06,886 BETTER DAYS. >> Steve: DANG >> Jimmy: THAT'S A GOOD JAM 102 00:08:06,886 --> 00:08:11,658 RIGHT THERE. ALSO, LATER IN THE SHOW, JUST IF YOU WANT TO SET YOUR VCRs, 103 00:08:11,658 --> 00:08:19,032 LATER WE'RE GOING TO MEET SOME TALENTED DOGS. WE HAVE A NEW BIT CALLED 104 00:08:19,032 --> 00:08:25,505 "WHAT'S UP, DOG?" LATER ON THE SHOW IT'S GOING TO BE GOOD. 105 00:08:25,505 --> 00:08:28,308 [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE FIRST, I WANT TO GIVE A SHOUTOUT TO QUESTLOVE. 106 00:08:28,308 --> 00:08:33,913 HE JUST GOT BACK FROM LONDON AT THE BAFTAS THAT IS THE BRITISH ACADEMY 107 00:08:33,913 --> 00:08:35,749 FILM AWARDS, ONE OF THE MOST PRESTIGIOUS AWARDS YOU CAN WIN AND HIS MOVIE "SUMMER OF SOUL" 108 00:08:35,749 --> 00:08:39,953 WON THE BAFTA FOR BEST DOCUMENTARY! [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE 109 00:08:39,953 --> 00:08:49,963 * DUDE >> Steve: COME ON! 110 00:08:49,963 --> 00:08:56,069 >> Jimmy: NO WAY COME ON! >> Questlove: YEAH, MAN. 111 00:08:56,069 --> 00:08:58,938 >> Jimmy: NO WAY [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE >> Questlove: YEAH, YEAH 112 00:08:58,938 --> 00:09:01,474 >> Jimmy: THE BEST >> Questlove: AWESOME. >> Jimmy: THE BEST 113 00:09:01,474 --> 00:09:05,512 WHAT WAS IT LIKE AND IS THAT IT RIGHT THERE BY THE DRUM 114 00:09:05,512 --> 00:09:07,614 >> Questlove: YES, IT'S THERE NEXT TO PRINCE RIGHT THERE THERE BY THE DRUMS, YEAH 115 00:09:07,614 --> 00:09:13,086 >> Jimmy: IT LOOKS -- DUDE, WHAT WAS IT -- >> Questlove IT WAS SURREAL. 116 00:09:13,086 --> 00:09:16,723 'CAUSE YOU KNOW, SATURDAY NIGHT I WAS AT THE DIRECTOR'S GUILD AWARDS 117 00:09:16,723 --> 00:09:18,792 AND RIGHT AFTER MY CATEGORY, I WENT STRAIGHT TO THE AIRPORT TEN HOURS TO LONDON. 118 00:09:18,792 --> 00:09:22,295 DID THE -- WENT TO THE BAFTAS. AND THEN WENT TO THE AIRPORT AND -- 119 00:09:22,295 --> 00:09:25,498 >> Jimmy: AND NOW YOU'RE HERE. >> NOW I'M HERE. I DIDN'T EVEN GO HOME YET. 120 00:09:25,498 --> 00:09:29,736 >> Jimmy: DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA WHERE YOU ARE RIGHT NOW? [ LAUGHTER ] 121 00:09:29,736 --> 00:09:31,638 >> I HAVE NO CLUE WHERE I AM RIGHT NOW. >> Jimmy: YOUR SPEECH WAS 122 00:09:31,638 --> 00:09:33,907 GREAT. YOU LOOKED GREAT AND CONGRATULATIONS ON "SUMMER 123 00:09:33,907 --> 00:09:36,042 OF SOUL," QUESTLOVE. [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE SO PROUD OF YOU, BUD 124 00:09:36,042 --> 00:09:38,144 >> THANK YOU >> Jimmy: SO, SO PROUD OF YOU, BUD. 125 00:09:38,144 --> 00:09:40,080 >> Steve: IT HAPPENED. >> Jimmy: IT'S A GREAT DOCUMENTARY. 126 00:09:40,080 --> 00:09:47,921 GREAT MOVIE. HEY, GUYS, AS I MENTIONED EARLIER, MARCH MADNESS IS HERE 127 00:09:47,921 --> 00:09:51,825 YESTERDAY WAS SELECTION SUNDAY AND THE BRACKET IS ALL SET SO, HERE AT "THE TONIGHT SHOW," 128 00:09:51,825 --> 00:09:53,793 WE LIKE TO PICK A TEAM TO DO SOMETHING FUN WITH EVERY YEAR. SOMETIMES, YOU GO WITH THE 129 00:09:53,793 --> 00:09:58,565 UNDERDOGS, OR, YOU KNOW, SOMETIMES -- ANYWAYS, THIS YEAR WE'RE GOING 130 00:09:58,565 --> 00:10:00,100 WITH - [ DRUMROLL ] THE GONZAGA BULLDOGS 131 00:10:00,100 --> 00:10:04,437 WE'RE GOING GONZAGA. [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE * 132 00:10:04,437 --> 00:10:08,174 GONZAGA! THEY'RE OUR TEAM LET'S DO THIS! 133 00:10:08,174 --> 00:10:11,544 SOMETIMES WE GO UNDERDOGS, SOMETIMES WE DON'T >> Steve: NO 134 00:10:11,544 --> 00:10:14,614 >> Jimmy: GONZAGA IS GOING TO GO ALL THE WAY WE LOVE GONZAGA. 135 00:10:14,614 --> 00:10:20,220 WE WANTED TO DO SOMETHING SPECIAL FOR GONZAGA, RIGHT SO, HERE'S WHAT WE'RE DOING. 136 00:10:20,220 --> 00:10:21,888 WE CREATED THESE ROWDY RAGS, OKAY NOW, THESE ARE -- THESE ARE 137 00:10:21,888 --> 00:10:24,824 TOWELS THAT YOU WAVE AROUND AT GAMES TO GET THE CROWD PUMPED UP, RIGHT? 138 00:10:24,824 --> 00:10:29,462 >> Steve: RIGHT. >> Jimmy: SO HERE'S -- [ CHEERS ] 139 00:10:29,462 --> 00:10:31,531 SEE HOW IT WORKS >> Steve: OH WOW >> Jimmy: EVERYONE KNOWS 140 00:10:31,531 --> 00:10:33,667 [ CHEERS ] BUT I NEED GONZAGA TO KNOW THAT, YOU KNOW, WE'RE IN THIS 141 00:10:33,667 --> 00:10:36,302 TOGETHER SO, HERE'S WHAT WE'RE GOING TO DO 142 00:10:36,302 --> 00:10:41,174 WE'RE GOING TO GIVE ALL THE STUDENTS THESE ROWDY RAGS. OKAY 143 00:10:41,174 --> 00:10:43,576 THEY'RE GOING TO GO -- WHEN IS THE GAME THE FIRST ROUND GAME IS THIS 144 00:10:43,576 --> 00:10:48,648 THURSDAY, OKAY AND WHAT WE'RE GOING TO ASK THEM TO DO IS ANY TIME DURING 145 00:10:48,648 --> 00:10:50,417 THE GAME WHEN THE CLOCK HITS 11:35 P.M., WHICH IS WHEN "THE TONIGHT SHOW" AIRS -- 146 00:10:50,417 --> 00:10:54,754 [ LAUGHTER ] THERE'S NO OTHER REASON TO CELEBRATE 11:35 ON THE CLOCK 147 00:10:54,754 --> 00:10:58,258 BUT WHEN THAT COMES ON THE CLOCK, I WANT YOU TO STAND UP, WAVE THE ROWDY RAGS AND YELL - 148 00:10:58,258 --> 00:11:00,660 * I'LL TELL YOU WHAT I WANT WHAT I REALLY, REALLY WANT * * SO TELL ME WHAT YOU WAN 149 00:11:00,660 --> 00:11:02,595 WHAT YOU REALL REALLY WANT * * I WANNA HUH 150 00:11:02,595 --> 00:11:04,698 I WANNA HUH * * I WANNA HUH I WANNA HUH * 151 00:11:04,698 --> 00:11:08,935 * I WANNA WIN, WIN, WIN GONZAGA, SAY AH * [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE 152 00:11:08,935 --> 00:11:15,342 WIN, WIN, WIN. THE CAN CHOREOGRAPH -- [ TALKING OVER EACH OTHER 153 00:11:15,342 --> 00:11:17,744 -- DO WHATEVER THEY WANT TO DO BUT THAT -- IF THAT HAPPENS, THAT WOULD JUST MAKE MY HEART 154 00:11:17,744 --> 00:11:22,082 MELT >> Steve: MELT, AH >> Jimmy: I'D JUST BE SO IN 155 00:11:22,082 --> 00:11:23,683 LOVE WITH THEM YEAH AND IT COULD HAPPEN TWICE 156 00:11:23,683 --> 00:11:30,857 BECAUSE THERE'S TWO HALVES >> Steve: SURE >> Jimmy: SO, 11:35, GO FOR IT 157 00:11:30,857 --> 00:11:33,960 * I'LL TELL YOU WHAT I WANT YEAH >> Steve: SO, 11:35 -- WHEN 158 00:11:33,960 --> 00:11:36,996 THERE'S 11:35 IN THE GAME, NOT 11:35 AT NIGHT >> Jimmy: NO 159 00:11:36,996 --> 00:11:40,133 I THINK THE GAME AIRS AT 7:15 OR SOMETHING. SO, DON'T WAIT FOR 11:35 160 00:11:40,133 --> 00:11:42,736 >> Steve: YEAH, DON'T WAIT -- DON'T BE AT NIGHT IN THE - >> Jimmy: YEAH, THE GAME WILL 161 00:11:42,736 --> 00:11:45,138 BE OVER BY THEN. GONZAGA WOULD HAVE WON >> Steve: YEAH 162 00:11:45,138 --> 00:11:47,140 >> Jimmy: SO, YEAH I THINK YOU SHOULD WATCH THE GAME -- IF YOU'RE AT THE GAME. 163 00:11:47,140 --> 00:11:48,908 LOOK AT THE COUNT -- THE CLOCK NOT YOUR CLOCK >> Steve: NOT THE WATCH. 164 00:11:48,908 --> 00:11:51,011 >> Jimmy: NO, NOT YOUR WATCH LOOK AT THE HOUR SEE HOW MUCH TIME IS LEFT IN 165 00:11:51,011 --> 00:11:52,679 THE GAME 11:35, GO CRAZY. AND IF YOU'RE AT THE GAME, 166 00:11:52,679 --> 00:11:58,852 CAPTURE IT ON THE SOCIALS. BECAUSE I DON'T KNOW IF WE CAN AFFORD THE RIGHTS TO SENDING A 167 00:11:58,852 --> 00:12:01,388 A CAMERA CREW THERE OR SOMETHING LIKE THAT. ANYWAYS, THIS THURSDAY, ITS 168 00:12:01,388 --> 00:12:06,092 4:15 EASTERN SO, IT'S 4:15 GAME SORRY. 169 00:12:06,092 --> 00:12:08,962 LET ME JUST GO BACK. THE GAME IS AT 4:15. >> Steve: 4:15 170 00:12:08,962 --> 00:12:13,967 [ LAUGHTER ] EASTERN? >> Jimmy: EASTERN, YEAH. 171 00:12:13,967 --> 00:12:16,870 IT'S NOT AT 7:15 - >> Steve: NOT -- WITH DAYLIGHT SAVINGS, YEAH. 172 00:12:16,870 --> 00:12:18,538 >> Jimmy: THAT WAS LIKE -- IF YOU ADD, LIKE, THREE HOURS OF DAYLIGHT SAVINGS - 173 00:12:18,538 --> 00:12:20,273 >> Steve: SURE >> Jimmy: THEN IT WOULD BE AROUND 7:15. 174 00:12:20,273 --> 00:12:23,777 >> Steve: OKAY WHAT IF I WAS WATCHING THE GAME SOMEWHERE ELSE 175 00:12:23,777 --> 00:12:26,112 LIKE IN THE MOUNTAINS? >> Jimmy: LIKE IN THE MOUNTAINS? 176 00:12:26,112 --> 00:12:29,082 WELL, IT DEPENDS YOU HAVE LIKE A SLING BOX OR SOMETHING? 177 00:12:29,082 --> 00:12:31,484 >> SURE. I MIGHT HAVE A SLING BOX >> Jimmy: THEN IT WOULD AIR AT 178 00:12:31,484 --> 00:12:34,954 4:15 EASTERN >> Steve: OKAY, THERE YOU GO >> Jimmy: YEAH, SO IF YOU CAN 179 00:12:34,954 --> 00:12:38,191 DO THE MATH -- [ LAUGHTER ] >> Steve: SO IF I WAS ON THE 180 00:12:38,191 --> 00:12:39,759 WEST COAST, IT WOULD STILL AIR AT 4:15 EASTERN? >> Jimmy: I DON'T NEED YOU TO 181 00:12:39,759 --> 00:12:41,661 WAVE THE RAG AT THAT TIME. DON'T EVEN WORRY ABOUT IT. >> Steve: OKAY 182 00:12:41,661 --> 00:12:44,097 [ LAUGHTER ] NOT GOING TO WORRY ABOUT IT AT ALL. 183 00:12:44,097 --> 00:12:48,101 I'M NOT GOING TO BE AT THE GAME I'M GOING TO BE WORKING. 184 00:12:48,101 --> 00:12:50,103 >> Jimmy: I KNOW - [ LAUGHTER ] WHAT DO YOU MEAN WORKING 185 00:12:50,103 --> 00:12:52,706 [ LAUGHTER ] >> Steve: YEAH, I'M WORKING. I'M WORKING HERE 186 00:12:52,706 --> 00:12:58,111 >> Jimmy: YEAH, WORKING. POLISHING YOUR AWARD >> Steve: YEAH, YEAH, YEAH 187 00:12:58,111 --> 00:13:03,650 >> Questlove: HEY, MAN YOU HAVE TO DO IT WITH A BAFTA >> Jimmy: BUT, THIS IS -- ALL 188 00:13:03,650 --> 00:13:06,052 RIGHT. SO, I DON'T KNOW HOW TO CLEAN THIS UP. 189 00:13:06,052 --> 00:13:09,255 CAN WE GO JUST BACK A LITTLE BIT? [ LAUGHTER ] 190 00:13:09,255 --> 00:13:11,324 [ RIM SHOT ] ALL RIGHT. GO CRAZY AT THE GAME AND BE 191 00:13:11,324 --> 00:13:14,427 SURE TO CAPTURE IT ON SOCIAL SO WE CAN AIR IT ON THE SHOW. GO ZAGS! 192 00:13:14,427 --> 00:13:22,168 GO ZAGS! [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE WHEN WE COME BACK, WE'RE 193 00:13:22,168 --> 00:13:23,536 MEETING SOME TALENTED DOGS IN A NEW BIT WE CALL "WHAT'S UP DOG? 194 00:13:23,536 --> 00:14:01,107 STICK AROUND EVERYBODY [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE * 195 00:14:01,107 --> 00:14:06,579 >> Jimmy: WELCOME BACK, EVERYBODY. NOW, WE LOVE DOGS HERE AT "THE 196 00:14:06,579 --> 00:14:09,783 TONIGHT SHOW," AND I REALLY LOVE TALENTED DOGS AND WE FOUND SOME TALENTED DOGS 197 00:14:09,783 --> 00:14:12,552 THAT WE THINK YOU'RE GOING TO LOVE IT'S TIME FOR "WHAT'S UP DOG?" 198 00:14:12,552 --> 00:14:13,687 IT'S TIME FOR "WHAT'S UP DOG?" HERE WE GO 199 00:14:14,721 --> 00:14:15,055 * 200 00:14:15,055 --> 00:14:21,661 * WHAT'S UP DOG * * WHAT'S UP DOG * * WHAT'S UP DOG * 201 00:14:21,661 --> 00:14:27,967 >> Jimmy: THIS IS "WHAT'S UP DOG? "THE TONIGHT SHOW'S" SHOWCASE 202 00:14:27,967 --> 00:14:30,236 FOR TALENTED DOGS. NOW LET'S SAY "WHAT'S UP" TO OUR FIRST DOG. 203 00:14:30,236 --> 00:14:32,572 COME ON OVER WELCOME. HELLO. 204 00:14:32,572 --> 00:14:33,973 [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE >> HELLO HOW YOU DOING, JIMMY 205 00:14:33,973 --> 00:14:36,343 >> Jimmy: HOW ARE YOU? NICE TO SEE YOU. >> NICE TO MEET YOU. 206 00:14:36,343 --> 00:14:38,578 >> Jimmy: WHAT'S YOUR NAME >> STUART. >> Jimmy: STUART, WHERE YOU 207 00:14:38,578 --> 00:14:40,146 FROM >> I'M FROM NEW HYDE PARK, NEW YORK 208 00:14:40,146 --> 00:14:42,649 >> Jimmy: HEY, STUART, THANKS FOR BEING HERE AND WHAT'S -- WHAT'S THE DOG'S 209 00:14:42,649 --> 00:14:45,085 NAME >> THIS IS TONKA >> Jimmy: HI, TONKA. 210 00:14:45,085 --> 00:14:47,220 >> TONKA, SAY HELLO TO JIMMY >> Jimmy: HI TONKA HI BUDDY, OH, MY GOSH, HE IS SO 211 00:14:47,220 --> 00:14:49,489 CUTE AND NOW, IS IT TONKA OR TOKA >> TONKA 212 00:14:49,489 --> 00:14:51,458 >> Jimmy: TONKA, LIKE THE TRUCK. >> EXACTLY 213 00:14:51,458 --> 00:14:53,526 >> Jimmy: YEAH, AND TONKA -- OH, MY GOSH. [ AUDIENCE AWS ] 214 00:14:53,526 --> 00:14:54,828 [ LAUGHTER ] HE'S SO CUTE WHAT DOES -- WHAT DOES TONKA DO 215 00:14:54,828 --> 00:14:58,998 BESIDES BE CUTE? >> HE'S GOING TO DO THE LIMBO FOR US 216 00:14:58,998 --> 00:15:03,870 >> Jimmy: OH, HE'S GONNA - YOU'VE GOT A DOG THAT LIMBOS THIS IS FUN. 217 00:15:03,870 --> 00:15:05,605 >> THAT'S THE PLAN >> Jimmy: TONKA, YOU READY FOR THIS 218 00:15:05,605 --> 00:15:08,108 >> READY TO DO THIS, TONKA LET'S GO >> Jimmy: ALL RIGHT, THIS IS 219 00:15:08,108 --> 00:15:10,643 PERFECT. ROOTS, NEED SOME LIMBO MUSIC * 220 00:15:10,643 --> 00:15:12,846 >> READY TONKA, OVER HERE. SIT DOWN SIT DOWN 221 00:15:12,846 --> 00:15:14,280 * READY? READY TO GO? 222 00:15:14,280 --> 00:15:16,049 THIS WAY READY? GO, GO, GO 223 00:15:16,049 --> 00:15:18,451 HEY. [ LAUGHTER ] COME BACK HERE 224 00:15:18,451 --> 00:15:21,654 >> Jimmy: YEAH, FANTASTIC! [ LAUGHTER ] >> COME HERE 225 00:15:21,654 --> 00:15:24,257 COME HERE. [ LAUGHTER ] >> Jimmy: HE'S REALLY -- I LIKE 226 00:15:24,257 --> 00:15:27,827 IT OH HEY! 227 00:15:27,827 --> 00:15:29,929 [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE >> GO AGAIN. COME HERE. 228 00:15:29,929 --> 00:15:33,600 * COME HERE. COME HERE. 229 00:15:33,600 --> 00:15:37,937 [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] >> Jimmy: I DON'T KNOW -- I DON'T KNOW IF IT'S - 230 00:15:37,937 --> 00:15:42,108 OH, HE'S GOING TO GO LOWER WAIT, HE - >> HE CAN DO IT. 231 00:15:42,108 --> 00:15:45,078 >> Jimmy: HE JUST WANTS MORE OF A CHALLENGE. >> READY, GO 232 00:15:45,078 --> 00:15:50,784 [ LAUGHTER ] ONE MORE TIME. TONKA, SIT DOWN. 233 00:15:50,784 --> 00:15:52,852 >> Jimmy: MAYBE HE CAN JUMP OVER IT. MAYBE HE CAN JUMP OVER IT. 234 00:15:52,852 --> 00:15:54,821 >> HE CAN'T JUMP >> Jimmy: TONKA -- NO, HE CAN'T JUMP 235 00:15:54,821 --> 00:16:00,026 TONKA, GOOD JOB. TONKA, COME HERE, BUDDY. WAIT, COME HERE. 236 00:16:00,026 --> 00:16:04,497 WAIT, WAIT - [ LAUGHTER ] THANK YOU SO MUCH. 237 00:16:04,497 --> 00:16:11,638 >> THANK YOU VERY MUCH >> Jimmy: I APPRECIATE IT. THANKS FOR HAVING HIM ON 238 00:16:11,638 --> 00:16:13,707 >> COME ON, TONKA, LET'S GO. [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE >> Jimmy: I LOVE THAT DOG. 239 00:16:13,707 --> 00:16:18,044 [ LAUGHTER ] THAT IS A SMART DOG. I LOVE THAT DOG. 240 00:16:18,044 --> 00:16:22,382 MAN, HE'S LIKE, "I DON'T WANT TO DO THAT, MAN. [ LAUGHTER ] 241 00:16:22,382 --> 00:16:25,318 ALL RIGHT. LET'S MEET OUR NEXT DOG. COME ON OUT HERE 242 00:16:25,318 --> 00:16:32,158 OH, WOW. * WHAT'S UP DOG * [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE 243 00:16:32,158 --> 00:16:34,060 >> Jimmy: THIS IS VERY CUTE. [ LAUGHTER ] OH, THIS IS VERY CUTE. 244 00:16:34,060 --> 00:16:35,662 HELLO. >> HELLO >> Jimmy: NICE TO SEE YOU. 245 00:16:35,662 --> 00:16:37,897 >> HI, NICE TO SEE YOU TOO >> Jimmy: WHAT'S YOUR NAME >> I'M KENTEE PASEK FROM 246 00:16:37,897 --> 00:16:40,467 OURAY, COLORADO. >> Jimmy: OH, WOW, KENTEE -- >> IT'S OVER BY TELLURIDE. 247 00:16:40,467 --> 00:16:43,703 >> Jimmy: I LOVE THAT NAME >> YEAH, THANKS! >> Jimmy: AND WHO DID YOU BRING 248 00:16:43,703 --> 00:16:46,172 WITH YOU HERE? >> THIS IS DEXTER DOG OURAY. [ AUDIENCE AWS ] 249 00:16:46,172 --> 00:16:50,744 >> Jimmy: HI, DEXTER OH, MY GOSH. NOW, WHAT IS -- WHAT CAN DEXTER 250 00:16:50,744 --> 00:16:55,615 DO >> YOU WANT TO SEE THIS? >> Jimmy: I DO WANT TO SEE 251 00:16:55,615 --> 00:16:57,517 THIS, YEAH 'CAUSE, BESIDES DRESS UP AS A -- 252 00:16:57,517 --> 00:17:03,023 >> RIGHT >> HE LOOKS FANTASTIC. >> HE'S SUPER CUTE 253 00:17:03,023 --> 00:17:05,058 >> Jimmy: YO, I LOVE HIS - YEAH >> ALL RIGHT, WELL, WE FIRST 254 00:17:05,058 --> 00:17:07,427 HAVE TO GET HIM OUT OF HERE. >> Jimmy: OKAY >> ALL RIGHT 255 00:17:07,427 --> 00:17:09,929 >> Jimmy: THAT'S OKAY. DEXTER, WELCOME TO THE SHOW. AND THANK YOU FOR DRESSING UP. 256 00:17:09,929 --> 00:17:12,165 I KNOW IT'S "THE TONIGHT SHOW," IT'S A BIG - [ LAUGHTER ] 257 00:17:12,165 --> 00:17:14,034 DO YOU WANT TO FIX HIS HAT >> OKAY. YOU READY? 258 00:17:14,034 --> 00:17:20,573 COME SAY HI. [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE >> Jimmy: WOW. 259 00:17:20,573 --> 00:17:25,879 >> OKAY. LET'S GO [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE 260 00:17:25,879 --> 00:17:27,847 COME ON. OH, THAT'S A GOOD BOY. >> Jimmy: OH, MY -- WHAT A GOOD 261 00:17:27,847 --> 00:17:29,949 BOY. WHAT A GOOD -- OH. [ AUDIENCE AWS ] 262 00:17:29,949 --> 00:17:31,351 THANK YOU VERY MUCH. [ LAUGHTER ] OH, MY GOSH. 263 00:17:31,351 --> 00:17:33,620 HE'S SO CUTE OH, MY GOSH. >> YEAH. 264 00:17:33,620 --> 00:17:36,656 >> Jimmy: WHEN DID HE -- WHEN DID YOU KNOW HE COULD DO THIS? >> UM, HE WAS ABOUT A YEAR OLD 265 00:17:36,656 --> 00:17:39,059 AND HE TAUGHT HIMSELF HOW TO WALK UPRIGHT [ LAUGHTER ] 266 00:17:39,059 --> 00:17:40,760 >> Jimmy: THAT IS THE GREATEST THANK YOU, YOU CRUSHED IT, DEXTER 267 00:17:40,760 --> 00:17:43,396 WELL DONE. >> AWESOME [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE 268 00:17:43,396 --> 00:17:45,498 >> Jimmy: THANK YOU VERY MUCH. >> THANK YOU NICE TO MEET YOU 269 00:17:45,498 --> 00:17:50,070 YEAH, COME ON. [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE >> Jimmy: UNBELIEVABLE 270 00:17:50,070 --> 00:17:57,811 [ LAUGHTER ] IT'S UNBELIEVABLE. LET'S MEET OUR LAST DOG. 271 00:17:57,811 --> 00:18:01,848 COME ON OVER HERE, BUD [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE * WHAT'S UP DOG * 272 00:18:01,848 --> 00:18:03,683 >> Jimmy: HI JIMMY. NICE TO MEET YOU 273 00:18:03,683 --> 00:18:06,019 >> DARAGH. NICE TO MEET YOU HEY, BUDDY 274 00:18:06,019 --> 00:18:09,556 SIT. >> Jimmy: WHAT DOG IS THIS WHAT KIND OF A DOG IS THIS 275 00:18:09,556 --> 00:18:11,224 >> THIS IS A YELLOW LAB, AND HIS NAME IS DEXTER THE BALANCING DOG. 276 00:18:11,224 --> 00:18:13,493 >> Jimmy: WAIT, DEXTER THE OTHER DOG'S NAME WAS DEXTER 277 00:18:13,493 --> 00:18:20,033 >> FROM COLORADO AS WELL >> Jimmy: WAIT, WHAT YOU'RE BOTH FROM COLORADO AND 278 00:18:20,033 --> 00:18:21,434 BOTH NAMED YOUR DOGS DEXTER. >> AND THEY'RE BOTH VERY TALENTED 279 00:18:21,434 --> 00:18:24,037 >> Jimmy: I WONDER IF WE CAN GET THE FIRST DOG TO CHANGE HIS NAME TO DEXTER 280 00:18:24,037 --> 00:18:26,773 [ LAUGHTER ] NOW WHAT IS DEXTER'S TALENT? >> HE CAN BALANCE ALMOST 281 00:18:26,773 --> 00:18:28,241 ANYTHING >> Jimmy: HE CAN BALANCE ALMOST ANYTHING 282 00:18:28,241 --> 00:18:33,046 >> YES >> Jimmy: ON HIS -- ON HIS SNOUT? 283 00:18:33,046 --> 00:18:38,952 >> YEAH, LIKE, SIT, STILL. STILL. [ LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE 284 00:18:38,952 --> 00:18:42,856 >> Jimmy: ALL RIGHT. SO THAT -- THAT WAS GOOD BUT IS THAT WHY HE'S ON "THE 285 00:18:42,856 --> 00:18:46,192 TONIGHT SHOW"? WHAT'S HE -- >> NO. 286 00:18:46,192 --> 00:18:48,328 HE CAN BALANCE OREOS >> Jimmy: OH, YOU WANT TO BALANCE OREOS, BUDDY 287 00:18:48,328 --> 00:18:53,867 >> YEAH, I THINK HE DOES >> Jimmy: I THINK HE'S READY ALL RIGHT. 288 00:18:53,867 --> 00:18:55,835 >> YEAH, READY, DEXTER, SIT. >> Jimmy: NOW, HOW MANY -- WHAT'S HIS RECORD? 289 00:18:55,835 --> 00:18:59,072 HOW MANY OREOS >> HE'S DONE 14, WHICH WAS PRETTY IMPRESSIVE, SO -- 290 00:18:59,072 --> 00:19:01,474 WE'LL SEE IF WE CAN GET THERE. >> Jimmy: SEE IF WE CAN GET IT EVEN CLOSE TO THAT 291 00:19:01,474 --> 00:19:05,078 >> READY, DEX? READY, STILL STILL. 292 00:19:05,078 --> 00:19:07,714 * OKAY, BUD, HEAD UP STILL. 293 00:19:07,714 --> 00:19:20,360 [ LAUGHTER ] STILL. [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE 294 00:19:20,360 --> 00:19:25,031 STILL. [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] AH 295 00:19:25,031 --> 00:19:27,300 >> Jimmy: IT WAS FANTASTIC [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE DOESN'T MATTER, THAT WAS 296 00:19:27,300 --> 00:19:29,202 FANTASTIC. THAT WAS FANTASTIC YOU DID A GREAT JOB. 297 00:19:29,202 --> 00:19:31,137 >> YEAH. >> Jimmy: OH, GIVE HIM A TREAT HE'S SO GOOD 298 00:19:31,137 --> 00:19:34,474 HE DID A GREAT JOB, DEXTER GOOD JOB >> COME HERE, DEX, SIT 299 00:19:34,474 --> 00:19:39,079 >> Jimmy: THANKS TO ALL OF OUR DOGS IF YOU HAVE A DOG WITH A FUN 300 00:19:39,079 --> 00:19:42,315 TALENT, I WANT TO SEE IT GO TO TONIGHTSHOW.COM/WHATSUPDOGS TO 301 00:19:42,315 --> 00:19:45,118 SUBMIT A VIDEO OF YOUR DOG [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE STICK AROUND, WE'LL BE RIGHT 302 00:19:45,118 --> 00:19:48,154 BACK WITH MARISA TOMEI, EVERYBODY. COME ON BACK 303 00:19:48,154 --> 00:19:55,195 [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE * >> THE THING WAS, IF ANYONE 304 00:19:55,195 --> 00:19:58,965 ASKED ME ABOUT IT, I WOULD HAVE NOTHING -- I -- I DON'T UNDERSTAND THE 305 00:19:58,965 --> 00:20:02,002 MULTIVERSE MYSELF. [ LAUGHTER ] >> Jimmy: SO YOU COULDN'T SPOIL 306 00:20:02,002 --> 00:20:05,505 IT YOU'D BE LIKE, "I DON'T KNOW WHAT IT IS." 307 00:20:09,209 --> 00:20:25,825 TO ME ONE MORE TIME? >> Jimmy: OUR FIRST GUEST IS AN OSCAR-WINNING ACTRESS WHO STARS 308 00:20:25,825 --> 00:20:27,894 AS MAY PARKER IN "SPIDER-MAN: NO WAY HOME," WHICH IS AVAILABLE ON DIGITAL TOMORROW. 309 00:20:27,894 --> 00:20:29,963 AVAILABLE ON DIGITAL TOMORROW. PLEASE WELCOME MARISA TOMEI. 310 00:20:31,498 --> 00:20:39,506 * 311 00:20:39,506 --> 00:20:53,386 * >> Jimmy: MARISA TOMEI, WELCOME. 312 00:20:53,386 --> 00:20:55,755 WELCOME TO THE SHOW. THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR BEING HERE 313 00:20:55,755 --> 00:20:58,591 I APPRECIATE IT. >> THANKS FOR HAVING ME. >> Jimmy: YEAH, THIS IS 314 00:20:58,591 --> 00:21:01,461 A BIG -- A BIG WEEKEND FOR YOU, WHICH IS INTERESTING TO ME I DID NOT KNOW THIS. 315 00:21:01,461 --> 00:21:03,863 YOUR GODDAUGHTER HOSTED "SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE." >> YES, SHE DID. 316 00:21:03,863 --> 00:21:06,232 ZOZO >> Jimmy: ZOE KRAVITZ IS YOUR - 317 00:21:06,232 --> 00:21:07,934 >> ZOE KRAVITZ YEAH >> Jimmy: -- IS YOUR 318 00:21:07,934 --> 00:21:13,973 GODDAUGHTER. [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE >> SHE KILLED IT 319 00:21:13,973 --> 00:21:15,642 SHE KILLED IT. >> Jimmy: SHE WAS FANTASTIC. >> YEAH. 320 00:21:15,642 --> 00:21:17,477 >> Jimmy: WE HAVE A PICTURE OF YOU AND -- THIS IS YOU AND LISA AND BABY ZOE 321 00:21:17,477 --> 00:21:19,379 >> OH, YEAH. WELL, YOU CAN'T REALLY TELL IT'S HER THOUGH. 322 00:21:19,379 --> 00:21:22,349 >> Jimmy: NO YOU CAN'T TELL. YEAH, THAT'S ZOE, RIGHT THERE. >> TAKE OUR WORD 323 00:21:22,349 --> 00:21:24,250 >> Jimmy: EXACTLY, YEAH. >> AND WHY I'M WEARING A TOWEL ON MY HEAD, I DO NOT KNOW. 324 00:21:24,250 --> 00:21:27,821 >> Jimmy: YEAH I MUST'VE BEEN CHILLY. [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] 325 00:21:27,821 --> 00:21:30,323 >> Jimmy: IS THIS FROM, LIKE, "A DIFFERENT WORLD?" IS THAT WHERE YOU MET? 326 00:21:30,323 --> 00:21:32,392 >> YEAH. WELL, WE MET BEFORE "A DIFFERENT WORLD," ACTUALLY 327 00:21:32,392 --> 00:21:34,728 >> Jimmy: OH, YOU DID? SO YOU'VE BEEN FRIENDS FOR A A WHILE. 328 00:21:34,728 --> 00:21:37,430 >> YEAH, WE MET IN -- YEAH, IN A -- LIKE, AN ACTING WORKSHOP. >> Jimmy: DID ZOE ASK FOR ANY 329 00:21:37,430 --> 00:21:39,933 ADVICE ON HOW TO HOST? YOU'VE HOSTED "SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE." 330 00:21:39,933 --> 00:21:43,336 >> I DID, MANY MOONS AGO AND SHE DOESN'T NEED ANY ADVICE 331 00:21:43,336 --> 00:21:46,106 SHE'S GOT IT >> Jimmy: SHE'S JUST SO COOL >> I MEAN, I WAS THERE TO CHEER 332 00:21:46,106 --> 00:21:48,508 HER ON, OF COURSE. >> Jimmy: I ASK HER ADVICE ON ANYTHING 333 00:21:48,508 --> 00:21:51,111 I'M LIKE, "ZOE, JUST TELL ME HOW TO BE COOL." >> I ASK HER FOR ADVICE. 334 00:21:51,111 --> 00:21:57,417 >> Jimmy: YEAH, EXACTLY. >> IT'S THE OTHER WAY AROUND >> Jimmy: I SAW THAT YESTERDAY 335 00:21:57,417 --> 00:22:01,388 MARKED THE 30th ANNIVERSARY OF "MY COUSIN VINNY," WHICH IS -- [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE 336 00:22:01,388 --> 00:22:07,927 --ONE OF YOUR GREAT FILMS THAT WE ALL LOVE. * 337 00:22:07,927 --> 00:22:10,563 WHEN YOU'RE DOING THAT -- WHEN YOU DO THAT MOVIE, WHEN YOU'RE FILMING IT, DID YOU HAVE ANY 338 00:22:10,563 --> 00:22:12,565 IDEA IT WOULD BE THAT BIG OF A A HIT, OR THAT YOU WOULD WIN AN OSCAR. 339 00:22:12,565 --> 00:22:18,571 I WAS JUST HAPPY TO HAVE A JOB [ LAUGHTER ] I DON'T KNOW 340 00:22:18,571 --> 00:22:21,474 WHO IS THE PERSON WHO THINKS, "I'M GOING TO WIN AN OSCAR." >> Jimmy: YEAH, YEAH, YEAH 341 00:22:21,474 --> 00:22:24,978 >> WHAT KIND OF CAJONES ARE YOU WALKING AROUND WITH? >> Jimmy: YEAH, EXACTLY. 342 00:22:24,978 --> 00:22:29,115 BUT IT BECAME THE BIGGEST MOVIE EVER I MEAN, I THINK VICE PRESIDENT, 343 00:22:29,115 --> 00:22:31,284 KAMALA HARRIS, SAID THAT THAT'S HER FAVORITE MOVIE >> KAMALA HARRIS SAID THAT 344 00:22:31,284 --> 00:22:34,487 >> Jimmy: YES. THAT'S HER FAVORITE MOVIE. "MY COUSIN VINNY." 345 00:22:34,487 --> 00:22:38,425 LOVES IT THEY TEACH IT IN COLLEGES -- IN LAW SCHOOL CLASSES 346 00:22:38,425 --> 00:22:42,095 >> THAT I KNEW THAT PART I KNEW YES, A LOT OF MANY A-LAWYER 347 00:22:42,095 --> 00:22:47,100 HAVE, KIND OF, USED THAT LINE ON ME. >> Jimmy: DID THEY EVER HAVE 348 00:22:47,100 --> 00:22:48,635 YOU COME IN AND, LIKE, SPEAK >> THEY ASK ME TO COME IN AND SPEAK. 349 00:22:48,635 --> 00:22:51,438 THEY ASK ME OTHER THINGS >> Jimmy: YEAH, THAT'S WILD. YEAH, YEAH 350 00:22:51,438 --> 00:22:54,240 [ LAUGHTER ] YOU'VE BEEN -- YOU'VE BEEN -- YOU'VE WON AND YOU'VE BEEN 351 00:22:54,240 --> 00:22:57,577 NOMINATED FOR MANY, MANY AWARDS BUT THERE IS AN HONOR THAT I'M 352 00:22:57,577 --> 00:23:02,115 NOT SURE IF YOU KNOW ABOUT THERE'S A SANDWICH NAMED AFTER YOU -- THE WORLD FAMOUS LIONI'S 353 00:23:02,115 --> 00:23:04,751 DELI IN BROOKLYN >> OH, REALLY? >> Jimmy: A MARISA TOMEI 354 00:23:04,751 --> 00:23:07,687 >> I DON'T KNOW THAT >> Jimmy: WELL, IT'S A VERY EXCLUSIVE CLUB 355 00:23:07,687 --> 00:23:11,291 [ LAUGHTER ] SO ON THE SANDWICH IS -- TELL ME IF YOU LIKE THIS -- FRIED 356 00:23:11,291 --> 00:23:14,094 EGGPLANT >> I LIKE IT >> Jimmy: FRESH MOZZARELLA 357 00:23:14,094 --> 00:23:16,196 >> LOVE IT >> Jimmy: BREAD CRUMBS >> LOVE IT 358 00:23:16,196 --> 00:23:21,101 >> Jimmy: AND MUSHROOM STUFFING >> NOT IN A SANDWICH 359 00:23:21,101 --> 00:23:23,770 >> Jimmy: NO MUSHROOM STUFFING >> OH, I'M DISAPPOINTING THE LIONI'S CREW, I GUESS. 360 00:23:23,770 --> 00:23:26,272 >> Jimmy: NO, NOT A MUSHROOM FAN? >> WELL, I LIKE -- WELL, WHAT 361 00:23:26,272 --> 00:23:28,641 ABOUT YOURSELF >> Jimmy: I DO NOT LIKE MUSHROOMS. 362 00:23:28,641 --> 00:23:32,445 I DON'T LIKE MAYONNAISE EITHER YEAH >> OH, YEAH. 363 00:23:32,445 --> 00:23:34,647 WE MIGHT A SIMILAR PALATE. >> Jimmy: MUSHROOMS AND MAYONNAISE, THAT'S THE ONLY 364 00:23:34,647 --> 00:23:37,584 THING I DON'T -- YEAH, I DON'T ENJOY THOSE. >> WE HAVE A SIMILAR PALATE, 365 00:23:37,584 --> 00:23:39,552 YEAH >> Jimmy: WELL, IF WE COULD TALK TO THOSE GUYS -- I FIGURED 366 00:23:39,552 --> 00:23:41,488 IF YOU'VE NEVER HEARD ABOUT IT, MAYBE YOU'VE NEVER TRIED IT. I GOT ONE WITH NO MUSHROOMS ON 367 00:23:41,488 --> 00:23:47,494 IT >> OH. >> Jimmy: I GOT TWO OF THEM 368 00:23:47,494 --> 00:23:50,096 ACTUALLY I FIGURED YOU COULD TRY YOUR OWN MARISA TOMEI ON "THE 369 00:23:50,096 --> 00:23:53,967 TONIGHT SHOW." MARISA TOMEI EATING A MARISA TOMEI 370 00:23:53,967 --> 00:24:00,106 [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE >> OKAY. DO YOU HAVE NAPKINS FOR US AND 371 00:24:00,106 --> 00:24:03,176 EVERYTHING DO WE HAVE A NAPKIN? >> Jimmy: OH, I DO 372 00:24:03,176 --> 00:24:04,744 >> I FEEL LIKE THIS IS GOING TO BE AWKWARD >> Jimmy: NO - 373 00:24:04,744 --> 00:24:10,917 YES! [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE THAT'S FAN - 374 00:24:10,917 --> 00:24:15,522 WHAT DO YOU THINK? >> I HAVE TO LEAN OVER WITH A SANDWICH THIS BIG. 375 00:24:15,522 --> 00:24:17,457 I, LIKE, CAN'T DO IT, LIKE, RIGHT HERE I'M GONNA MAKE A MESS. 376 00:24:17,457 --> 00:24:21,061 >> Jimmy: NO, YOU CAN BARELY EVEN TALK WHEN YOU HAVE A BITE CAN WE TALK ABOUT "SPIDER-MAN: 377 00:24:21,061 --> 00:24:22,228 NO WAY HOME" >> YES YEAH 378 00:24:22,228 --> 00:24:29,536 >> Jimmy: YOU WERE FANTASTIC IN THIS [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE 379 00:24:29,536 --> 00:24:33,139 REALLY -- YOU'RE ALWAYS -- YOU'RE GREAT IN ALL OF THEM. IT'S MADE ALMOST -- I KNOW 380 00:24:33,139 --> 00:24:38,611 IT MADE ALMOST $2 BILLION WORLDWIDE. I MEAN, IT IS A GIANT MOVIE. 381 00:24:38,611 --> 00:24:40,714 IT'S THE THIRD HIGHEST GROSSING MOVIE IN HISTORY >> IT'S SO COOL. 382 00:24:40,714 --> 00:24:42,782 IT'S SO COOL IT'S REALLY A COOL THING TO BE A PART OF. 383 00:24:42,782 --> 00:24:44,751 [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE >> Jimmy: BUT IT'S A GREAT MOVIE TOO. 384 00:24:44,751 --> 00:24:46,553 >> YEAH. >> Jimmy: I LOVED EVERY SINGLE SECOND OF IT 385 00:24:46,553 --> 00:24:51,591 YOU PLAY MAY PARKER. I LOVE -- I LOVE YOU I LOVE TOM HOLLAND 386 00:24:51,591 --> 00:24:58,298 I LOVE ZENDAYA I COULDN'T GET ENOUGH OF EVERY SINGLE PERSON IN THIS MOVIE. 387 00:24:58,298 --> 00:25:01,568 I GO, "I DON'T WANT IT TO END. I WANT IT TO JUST KEEP GOING ON AND ON." 388 00:25:01,568 --> 00:25:03,470 IS IT TOUGH TO DO THOSE MOVIES KNOWING THAT YOU CAN'T SPOIL ANYTHING OR TALK ABOUT 389 00:25:03,470 --> 00:25:10,210 ANYTHING >> WELL, YES, AT FIRST IT IS BECAUSE YOU HAVE TO SIGN A LOT 390 00:25:10,210 --> 00:25:12,345 OF THINGS AND IT'S ALL UNDER SECRECY. FRIENDS WILL ASK 391 00:25:12,345 --> 00:25:14,247 OUR FAMILY MEMBERS WILL ASK ABOUT IT >> Jimmy: SO, YOU'RE HAPPY IT'S 392 00:25:14,247 --> 00:25:17,083 OUT. >> I'M HAPPY IT'S OUT. I'M HAPPY IT'S OUT NOW 393 00:25:17,083 --> 00:25:19,419 AND I DON'T HAVE TO KEEP THAT SECRET ANYMORE >> Jimmy: YEAH 394 00:25:19,419 --> 00:25:21,388 I MEAN, I WOULDN'T BOTHER YOU WITH QUESTIONS, LIKE, IF I SAW YOU ON THE STREET. 395 00:25:21,388 --> 00:25:24,357 >> YOU WOULDN'T? >> Jimmy: NO, I'D JUST BE LIKE, "I'M COOL. 396 00:25:24,357 --> 00:25:28,695 >> WOULD YOU JUST LIKE - [ LAUGHTER ] >> Jimmy: I WOULDN'T DO IT 397 00:25:28,695 --> 00:25:30,663 BECAUSE I ALREADY KNOW THE THING. THE ANSWER IS, "JIMMY, DON'T 398 00:25:30,663 --> 00:25:32,899 MAKE ME DO THIS," YEAH SO, I WOULDN'T DO IT AND THEN AFTER SEEING IT, WOW, 399 00:25:32,899 --> 00:25:34,434 THERE'S SOME SPOILERS. >> THERE ARE SOME SPOILERS, YES, YEAH. 400 00:25:34,434 --> 00:25:37,671 BUT MAYBE A FEW PEOPLE DON'T KNOW YET SO, WE CAN'T -- WE STILL CAN'T 401 00:25:37,671 --> 00:25:39,305 TALK ABOUT IT. >> Jimmy: WE STILL CAN'T -- YEAH 402 00:25:39,305 --> 00:25:44,477 CAN WE NOT TALK ABOUT -- CAN WE TALK ABOUT THE -- >> WE CAN TALK ABOUT - 403 00:25:44,477 --> 00:25:47,280 >> Jimmy: CAN WE TALK ABOUT THAT >> YEAH, WE CAN TALK ABOUT 404 00:25:47,280 --> 00:25:49,649 THAT >> Jimmy: WE CAN >> IF WE WANT TO 405 00:25:49,649 --> 00:25:55,388 [ LAUGHTER ] I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT HE'S TALKING ABOUT. 406 00:25:55,388 --> 00:25:58,458 >> Jimmy: THE FACT THAT THERE IS A MULTIVERSE. >> OH, YES 407 00:25:58,458 --> 00:26:00,727 THERE IS A MULTIVERSE. YES. >> Jimmy: OKAY 408 00:26:00,727 --> 00:26:05,298 WE CAN SAY THAT. >> YES >> Jimmy: YEAH, I DON'T WANT TO 409 00:26:05,298 --> 00:26:08,401 RUIN IT FOR ANY FANS OUT THERE >> RIGHT, YES, THERE IS A MULTIVERSE 410 00:26:08,401 --> 00:26:10,236 >> Jimmy: IF YOU HAVEN'T BEEN TO THE MOVIES -- >> THAT WAS PART OF THE SECRECY 411 00:26:10,236 --> 00:26:12,339 THOUGH THAT'S TRUE. THAT WAS PART OF THE SECRECY 412 00:26:12,339 --> 00:26:14,040 ORIGINALLY NOW A LOT OF PEOPLE KNOW >> Jimmy: YEAH 413 00:26:14,040 --> 00:26:16,042 BUT THE THING WAS, IF ANYONE ASKED ME ABOUT IT, I WOULD HAVE NOTHING -- I DON'T UNDERSTAND 414 00:26:16,042 --> 00:26:19,045 THE MULTIVERSE, MYSELF [ LAUGHTER ] >> Jimmy: SO, YOU COULDN'T 415 00:26:19,045 --> 00:26:24,217 SPOIL IT YOU'D BE LIKE, "I DON'T KNOW WHAT IT IS." 416 00:26:24,217 --> 00:26:26,753 >> OUR WONDERFUL DIRECTOR, JON, AND I'M LIKE, "AND SO, WHERE AM I NOW? 417 00:26:26,753 --> 00:26:29,122 OKAY, WELL CAN YOU EXPLAIN IT TO ME ONE MORE TIME? [ LAUGHTER ] 418 00:26:29,122 --> 00:26:30,790 >> Jimmy: YEAH WELL, KNOWING THAT THERE IS A MULTIVERSE - 419 00:26:30,790 --> 00:26:33,293 >> YEAH, WHAT DO YOU THINK -- ARE YOU DONE WITH THE SANDWICH [ LAUGHTER ] 420 00:26:33,293 --> 00:26:38,765 >> Jimmy: NO, I CAN GO FOR IT. I ACTUALLY REALLY -- [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE 421 00:26:38,765 --> 00:26:54,280 NOPE [ MURMURING >> Jimmy: DO YOU THINK THAT -- 422 00:26:54,280 --> 00:26:58,084 [ LAUGHTER ] DO YOU THINK THAT YOU WOULD EVER DO -- WOULD MAY PARKER BE 423 00:26:58,084 --> 00:27:03,023 IN A MULTIVERSE THING? WOULD YOU EVER WANT TO DO SOMETHING WITH - 424 00:27:03,023 --> 00:27:05,392 >> YEAH, I WOULD LOVE TO COME BACK AND BE PART OF THAT - I WANT TO BE 425 00:27:05,392 --> 00:27:09,162 >> Jimmy: LIKE, A DIFFERENT MOVIE? >> YEAH. 426 00:27:09,162 --> 00:27:12,198 >> Jimmy: YOU WOULD DO IT? >> YEAH. THERE'S HISTORY THERE TOO. 427 00:27:12,198 --> 00:27:13,800 MAY PARKER HOOKS UP WITH ANT-MAN IN ONE OF -- WELL, I MEAN, SHE'S A STAND ALONE 428 00:27:13,800 --> 00:27:18,038 CHARACTER, OF COURSE >> Jimmy: YES, OF COURSE >> BUT THERE ARE MORE AVENUES 429 00:27:18,038 --> 00:27:20,440 TO EXPLORE >> Jimmy: ALL RIGHT. I'M GOING TO ROOT FOR THAT 430 00:27:20,440 --> 00:27:22,409 RIGHT NOW. >> IS THERE ANYTHING IN MY TEETH? 431 00:27:22,409 --> 00:27:25,078 [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE >> Jimmy: LET ME SEE I WILL TELL YOU. 432 00:27:25,078 --> 00:27:28,048 NO, YOU LOOK BEAUTIFUL I WANT TO SHOW EVERYONE A CLIP HERE'S MARISA TOMEI, NOT THE 433 00:27:28,048 --> 00:27:29,382 SANDWICH, IN "SPIDER-MAN: NO WAY HOME." TAKE A LOOK. 434 00:27:29,382 --> 00:27:29,416 WAY HOME." TAKE A LOOK. 435 00:27:34,120 --> 00:27:35,722 I DIDN'T REALIZE YOU WERE MISERABLE. 436 00:27:35,722 --> 00:27:37,691 >> NO, IT WAS REALLY FUN THAT'S WHY -- YOU KNOW THAT'S WHY THEY CALL IT A FLING 437 00:27:37,691 --> 00:27:39,926 AND WE FLUNG >> IT WAS FUN. I COULD HAVE BEEN MORE FUN 438 00:27:39,926 --> 00:27:46,366 I CAN BE FUN >> WE'LL HANG OUT AGAIN. >> WHEN DO YOU THINK 439 00:27:46,366 --> 00:27:49,703 I SHOULD SEE WHAT THAT IS. >> NO, NO, NO, NO, NO. >> THIS IS WHAT I DO 440 00:27:49,703 --> 00:27:51,805 >> HE'S ALWAYS COMING AND GOING. IT'S NOT - 441 00:27:51,805 --> 00:27:54,307 >> PETER >> PETER >> OH NO 442 00:27:54,307 --> 00:27:56,409 OH GOD >> OH, NO. >> PETER 443 00:27:56,409 --> 00:27:58,778 >> I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO >> PETER [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE 444 00:27:58,778 --> 00:28:02,148 >> Jimmy: MARISA TOMEI, EVERYBODY! "SPIDER-MAN: NO WAY HOME" IS 445 00:28:02,148 --> 00:28:04,617 AVAILABLE ON DIGITAL STARTING TOMORROW WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK WITH 446 00:28:04,617 --> 00:28:07,654 JON GLASER STICK AROUND [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE 447 00:28:07,654 --> 00:28:28,241 * >> Jimmy: OUR NEXT GUEST IS A VERY FUNNY MAN AND A TALENTED 448 00:28:28,241 --> 00:28:32,879 ACTOR. YOU CAN SEE HIM IN AMY SCHUMER'S NEW SERIES 449 00:28:32,879 --> 00:28:36,216 "LIFE & BETH," WHICH PREMIERES THIS FRIDAY ON HULU. PLEASE WELCOME THE ALWAYS 450 00:28:36,216 --> 00:28:39,052 PLEASE WELCOME THE ALWAYS ENTERTAINING JON GLASER. 451 00:28:40,487 --> 00:28:47,260 * 452 00:28:47,260 --> 00:28:59,205 * >> Jimmy: I'VE NEVER - WE'VE HAD MANY GUESTS ON THIS 453 00:28:59,205 --> 00:29:01,808 SHOW I'VE NEVER SEEN HALF A STANDING OVATION. 454 00:29:01,808 --> 00:29:04,210 THAT WAS - [ LAUGHTER ] >> THAT'S PRETTY SOLID 455 00:29:04,210 --> 00:29:06,579 >> Jimmy: THAT'S NOT BAD, NO >> IT'S ABOUT AS GOOD AS IT GETS 456 00:29:06,579 --> 00:29:10,216 >> Jimmy: IT REALLY IS -- IT'S ALMOST AS GOOD AS IT GETS. >> YEAH. 457 00:29:10,216 --> 00:29:12,719 >> Jimmy: A FULL OVATION WOULD BE PROBABLY AS GOOD AS IT GETS >> THAT'S PRETTY SOLID 458 00:29:12,719 --> 00:29:17,524 YOU KNOW WHAT? I'M GOING TO DISAGREE WITH YOU I THINK A HALF OVATION IS AS 459 00:29:17,524 --> 00:29:23,663 GOOD AS IT GETS. [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE 'CAUSE A FULL OVATION -- A FULL 460 00:29:23,663 --> 00:29:27,167 OVATION IS LIKE, "NO, THEY CUED THEM TO ALL STAND UP." THAT'S LIKE, THE HARD CORE 461 00:29:27,167 --> 00:29:32,339 FANS LIKE, OH, THEY ACTUALLY DID IT IT'S NOT - 462 00:29:32,339 --> 00:29:35,275 [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE >> Jimmy: BUT MAYBE I DIDN'T EVEN GIVE YOU LIKE A -- MAYBE 463 00:29:35,275 --> 00:29:37,510 IF I REALLY UPPED YOUR NAME OR SOMETHING, THEY'D GIVE A FULL OVATION. 464 00:29:37,510 --> 00:29:39,579 >> I DON'T -- YOU KNOW WHAT? I DON'T WANT THE FULL OVATION. [ LAUGHTER ] 465 00:29:39,579 --> 00:29:44,751 I WANT THE HALF. IT'S QUALITY NOT QUANTITY. >> Jimmy: WAIT, BUT THAT'D 466 00:29:44,751 --> 00:29:46,486 BE - >> QUALITY NOT QUANTITY! [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE 467 00:29:46,486 --> 00:29:51,624 QUALITY, NOT QUANTITY. [ DRUMROLL ] >> Jimmy: BUT -- BUT WHAT IF -- 468 00:29:51,624 --> 00:29:55,261 HAVE YOU SEEN -- HAVE YOU SEEN THE OTHER HALF STAND >> I DON'T WANT THEM TO STAND. 469 00:29:55,261 --> 00:29:57,230 THEY SAT, STAY SEATED. [ LAUGHTER ] COMMIT 470 00:29:57,230 --> 00:30:01,568 COMMIT TO YOUR DISINTEREST [ LAUGHTER ] I DON'T GIVE A [ BLEEP ] 471 00:30:01,568 --> 00:30:03,403 >> Jimmy:, OH, MY -- HEY, HEY >> BLEEP IT! 472 00:30:03,403 --> 00:30:06,339 BLEEP THAT [ LAUGHTER ] >> Jimmy: YOU'VE GOT A LOT 473 00:30:06,339 --> 00:30:09,309 GOING ON, JON. YOU'RE COMING IN HOT TONIGHT, MAN. 474 00:30:09,309 --> 00:30:15,148 DUDE, YOU HAVE A LOT GOING ON. YOU'RE IN THE NEW SERIES, AMY SCHUMER'S NEW SERIES 475 00:30:15,148 --> 00:30:16,983 "LIFE & BETH." >> YEP >> Jimmy: YOU'RE ALSO ON 476 00:30:16,983 --> 00:30:18,651 "LAW & ORDER." >> YEAH, I'M ON "LAW & ORDER: SVU. 477 00:30:18,651 --> 00:30:20,587 >> Jimmy: YEP, "LAW & ORDER: SVU. [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE 478 00:30:20,587 --> 00:30:26,326 >> "SVU. IT'S JON GLASER DOUCHEBAG WEEK [ LAUGHTER ] 479 00:30:26,326 --> 00:30:29,929 I GENERALLY SEEM TO PLAY [ BLEEP ], SO YEAH >> Jimmy: THAT'S WEIRD 480 00:30:29,929 --> 00:30:35,835 BECAUSE YOU'RE SUCH A FUNNY, NICE GUY >> I'D LIKE TO THINK SO, BUT 481 00:30:35,835 --> 00:30:38,672 IT -- SOMETIMES I QUESTION, LIKE, "WHY AM I SO GOOD AT PLAYING A TOTAL -- I'M GONNA 482 00:30:38,672 --> 00:30:40,507 SWEAR AGAIN, A TOTAL [ BLEEP ], RIGHT? [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE 483 00:30:40,507 --> 00:30:42,108 >> Jimmy: HEY, NOW -- NOW -- WAIT - WHY DO YOU - 484 00:30:42,108 --> 00:30:43,943 >> BLEEP IT! BLEEP IT WHO CARES? 485 00:30:43,943 --> 00:30:48,014 >> Jimmy: STOP SAYING "BLEEP IT, WHO CARES. DON'T CURSE ANYMORE. 486 00:30:48,014 --> 00:30:49,549 >> ALSO BLEEP WHEN I SAY "BLEEP." [ LAUGHTER ] 487 00:30:49,549 --> 00:30:52,218 BUT YEAH, SO I SEEM TO EXCEL AT PLAYING A DOUCHEBAG AND -- >> Jimmy: BLEEP IT 488 00:30:52,218 --> 00:30:55,121 WHO CARES? >> BLEEP IT! [ LAUGHTER ] 489 00:30:55,121 --> 00:30:57,090 THAT'S GOTTA BE -- >> Jimmy: THAT'S ANOTHER CHARACTER. 490 00:30:57,090 --> 00:30:59,893 >> "JUST BLEEP IT. >> Jimmy: "JUST BLEEP IT." >> "WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO? 491 00:30:59,893 --> 00:31:06,199 BLEEP IT." >> Jimmy: "HEY!" >> "BLEEP IT!" 492 00:31:06,199 --> 00:31:10,970 >> Jimmy: "HEY, BLEEP IT!" UH, BUT CAN WE TALK ABOUT WHICH TYPE OF AN A-HOLE YOU PLAY IN 493 00:31:10,970 --> 00:31:17,677 THE AMY SCHUMER SHOW [ LAUGHTER ] >> SO, THE PIECE OF [ BLEEP ] 494 00:31:17,677 --> 00:31:20,313 THAT I PLAY IN - [ LAUGHTER ] -- "LIFE & BETH" WORKS AT 495 00:31:20,313 --> 00:31:23,850 A VINEYARD HIS NAME IS GERALD [ LAUGHTER ] 496 00:31:23,850 --> 00:31:27,187 WITH A G, WITH A HARD G. >> Jimmy: GERALD, NOT JERALD >> NOT JERALD. 497 00:31:27,187 --> 00:31:32,092 IT'S GERALD. HE'S GOT A GOATEE AND A LIKE, A RAT TAIL PONY TAIL - 498 00:31:32,092 --> 00:31:36,262 [ LAUGHTER ] -- THAT HE'S ALWAYS KIND OF, LIKE, MAKING SURE HE PULLS 499 00:31:36,262 --> 00:31:40,400 AROUND HIS NECK, AND HE'S PLAYING WITH IT, SO -- >> Jimmy: YEAH, I -- OH, THAT'S 500 00:31:40,400 --> 00:31:42,168 PERFECT. THAT'S PERFECT >> PRETTY ENJOYABLE. 501 00:31:42,168 --> 00:31:44,537 >> Jimmy: I WANT TO SHOW EVERYONE A CLIP. HERE'S JON GLASER AND 502 00:31:44,537 --> 00:31:45,905 HERE'S JON GLASER AND AMY SCHUMER IN "LIFE & BETH. 503 00:31:47,540 --> 00:31:49,109 HOW CAN I HELP YOU 504 00:31:49,109 --> 00:31:52,379 >> UH, I HAVE AN APPOINTMENT WITH JERALD, THE WINE MANAGER. >> UH, "GERALD." 505 00:31:52,379 --> 00:31:58,118 IT'S PRONOUNCED "GERALD. >> GERALD, OKAY. >> AND, WELL, GERALD IS ME 506 00:31:58,118 --> 00:32:00,887 >> OH, WELL. >> AND, AS YOU CAN SEE, I'M WITH SOME CUSTOMERS RIGHT NOW, 507 00:32:00,887 --> 00:32:04,124 SO IF YOU CAN JUST BE A LITTLE PATIENT, I'D APPRECIATE IT >> SURE. 508 00:32:04,124 --> 00:32:08,862 I'LL WAIT RIGHT HERE >> UH, ACTUALLY, UH, THIS SECTION IS FOR CUSTOMERS ONLY. 509 00:32:08,862 --> 00:32:12,232 SO IF YOU DON'T MIND WAITING OUTSIDE, IT'D BE A BIG HELP. >> OKAY? 510 00:32:12,232 --> 00:32:14,901 >> YOU KNOW, I'M NOT REALLY SURE WHAT YOUR SCHOOL OF THOUGHT IS, BUT FOR ME, 511 00:32:14,901 --> 00:32:19,139 CUSTOMER IS NEVER WRONG. BUT YOU CITY PEOPLE DON'T REALLY UNDERSTAND THAT, DO YOU 512 00:32:19,139 --> 00:32:23,309 >> OKAY. >> 'CAUSE YOU'RE SO SPECIAL. >> OKAY. 513 00:32:23,309 --> 00:32:25,812 >> NO TIME FOR OTHER PEOPLE'S STORIES. >> I'M JUST GOING TO WAIT. 514 00:32:25,812 --> 00:32:27,881 I'LL WAIT OUT THERE. THANK YOU. >> THANK YOU 515 00:32:27,881 --> 00:32:31,685 THAT WOULD BE GREAT. HOW WE DOING ON THAT PINOT, GUYS 516 00:32:31,685 --> 00:32:35,889 [ LAUGHTER ] [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE >> Jimmy: HOW WERE THEY 517 00:32:35,889 --> 00:32:38,224 DOING -- HOW WERE THEY DOING ON THAT PINOT THEY'RE GETTING AROUND TO IT 518 00:32:38,224 --> 00:32:43,329 >> PRETTY GOOD, YEAH >> Jimmy: GOOD, YEAH >> HOW DID -- HOW DID MY HALF 519 00:32:43,329 --> 00:32:45,098 OF THE AUDIENCE LOVE THAT? [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE YEAH 520 00:32:45,098 --> 00:32:51,538 * >> Jimmy: HOW DID THE OTHER HALF OF THE AUDIENCE THINK 521 00:32:51,538 --> 00:32:55,342 ABOUT THAT [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE >> I DON'T EVEN GIVE A 522 00:32:55,342 --> 00:32:56,876 A [ BLEEP ]. [ LAUGHTER ] >> Together: "BLEEP IT!" 523 00:32:56,876 --> 00:33:00,080 >> COME ON, BLEEP IT [ LAUGHTER ] >> Jimmy: WHAT IN THE WORLD, 524 00:33:00,080 --> 00:33:06,052 MAN? >> GO BLEEP IT >> Jimmy: OH, MY GOSH. 525 00:33:06,052 --> 00:33:09,622 YOU'VE DONE SO MANY FUNNY ROLES, BUT THIS -- THIS "LAW & ORDER: SVU" IS 526 00:33:09,622 --> 00:33:14,227 A DRAMATIC ROLE. >> THIS JUST KIND OF CAME OUT OF NOWHERE 527 00:33:14,227 --> 00:33:16,329 AND I WAS VERY EXCITED TO DO IT AND ONE OF THE FUN THINGS WAS 528 00:33:16,329 --> 00:33:19,065 THAT THEY ASKED ME TO DYE MY HAIR BLONDE. [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] 529 00:33:19,065 --> 00:33:26,072 WHICH WAS PRETTY ENJOYABLE AND THERE'S A PHOTO. [ LAUGHTER ] 530 00:33:26,072 --> 00:33:29,209 AND SO, I STILL HAVE THE HAIR, WHICH I'LL SHOW RIGHT NOW. >> Jimmy: WOW. 531 00:33:29,209 --> 00:33:33,680 [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE >> YEAH. OH, YEAH 532 00:33:33,680 --> 00:33:42,355 [ APPLAUSE ] I'LL PUT MY -- I'LL PUT MY DETROIT BAD BOYS HAT RIGHT 533 00:33:42,355 --> 00:33:45,158 THERE. >> Jimmy: YEAH, THAT'S WHERE IT GOES 534 00:33:45,158 --> 00:33:49,095 >> I DON'T KNOW IF YOU WANT TO GET A SHOT OF THAT >> Jimmy: NO, WE -- WE DON'T 535 00:33:49,095 --> 00:33:51,331 NO, WE DON'T - >> YEAH, YOU DO! >> Jimmy: NO, WE DON'T WANT TO 536 00:33:51,331 --> 00:33:53,700 GET A SHOT OF THAT >> SO YEAH, SO -- SO, I GOT TO GO - 537 00:33:53,700 --> 00:33:55,769 >> Jimmy: WOW, YOU LOOK COOL >> SEE, THAT'S THE THING I LOVE IT. 538 00:33:55,769 --> 00:33:58,171 I KNOW IT LOOKS RIDICULOUS I THINK IT LOOKS COOL. MY WIFE HATES IT 539 00:33:58,171 --> 00:34:01,074 BUT I DIDN'T WANT TO THEN JUST GET RID OF THE HAIR. SO, I'VE KEPT THIS FOR THE LAST 540 00:34:01,074 --> 00:34:07,147 MONTH. [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] AND I'VE BEEN THOROUGHLY 541 00:34:07,147 --> 00:34:12,152 ENJOYING IT. I KNOW IT LOOKS DUMB I'LL TAKE IT TO MY GRAVE THAT I 542 00:34:12,152 --> 00:34:13,820 LOOK COOL AS [ BLEEP ] [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE BLEEP IT 543 00:34:13,820 --> 00:34:20,226 BLEEP IT >> Jimmy: B.I. >> BUT ANYWAY, SO, I TOLD MY 544 00:34:20,226 --> 00:34:24,330 WIFE, I'M LIKE, "HOW ABOUT JUST, WHEN THE EPISODE AIRS, THEN WE'LL CUT IT. 545 00:34:24,330 --> 00:34:26,833 AND THEN THIS CAME UP JUST THIS WEEKEND. AND I THOUGHT, "LET'S JUST DO 546 00:34:26,833 --> 00:34:32,072 THIS MORE SPECTACULARLY. I BROUGHT SOME SCISSORS. [ CHEERS ] 547 00:34:32,072 --> 00:34:39,079 YEAH >> Jimmy: I'M HONORED. >> I WANT YOU TO BE THE HERO TO 548 00:34:39,079 --> 00:34:41,381 MY WIFE, AND I WANT YOU TO CUT THE BLONDE - I'M NOT -- I WANT -- THIS IS 549 00:34:41,381 --> 00:34:44,184 TOUGH FOR ME, BUT LET'S JUST -- IT'S TIME FOR IT TO GO >> Jimmy: ARE YOU SURE, JON? 550 00:34:44,184 --> 00:34:46,419 >> YEAH, LET'S DO THIS [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE >> Jimmy: YOU WANT ME TO DO IT, 551 00:34:46,419 --> 00:34:49,522 I'LL DO IT >> BUT HERE'S THE THING -- HOLD UP 552 00:34:49,522 --> 00:34:52,559 HERE'S -- I WANT YOU TO LIKE -- IT CAN BE A HATCHET JOB, DON'T -- YOU KNOW, BUT - 553 00:34:52,559 --> 00:34:58,198 >> Jimmy: OH, IT WILL BE >> DO THIS [ LAUGHTER ] 554 00:34:58,198 --> 00:35:00,266 >> Jimmy: I DON'T KNOW WHAT I'M DOING. >> LEAVE -- LEAVE A LITTLE BIT 555 00:35:00,266 --> 00:35:02,535 IN THE FRONT LEAVE LIKE A UNICORN HORN -- >> Jimmy: ALL RIGHT. 556 00:35:02,535 --> 00:35:05,338 >> -- THAT I CAN TAKE HOME TO MY WIFE, AND THEN SHE'LL DO THAT 557 00:35:05,338 --> 00:35:08,675 [ LAUGHTER ] [ CHEERS ] >> Jimmy: JON, THIS IS - 558 00:35:08,675 --> 00:35:10,944 >> YEAH. >> Jimmy: I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU'RE LETTING ME DO THIS. 559 00:35:10,944 --> 00:35:13,446 >> NOW WHAT'S GONNA BE - >> Jimmy: YOU WANT TO SEE IT, OR YOU DON'T WANT TO SEE IT? 560 00:35:13,446 --> 00:35:15,382 >> OH, SURE. LET ME TAKE THIS HOME TO MY WIFE 561 00:35:15,382 --> 00:35:19,319 I'LL PUT IT IN MY BAD BOYS HAT [ LAUGHTER ] NOW YOU KNOW WHAT'S GOING TO BE 562 00:35:19,319 --> 00:35:23,790 REALLY NICE? YOU KNOW, THE SHOW AIRS LATER, SO WHILE TONIGHT, MY WIFE AND I 563 00:35:23,790 --> 00:35:28,395 WILL BE MAKING LOVE -- [ LAUGHTER ] AND WE'LL PUT THE SHOW ON, 564 00:35:28,395 --> 00:35:30,363 WE'LL MAKE LOVE TO THE IMAGE OF YOU CUTTING MY HAIR. [ LAUGHTER ] 565 00:35:30,363 --> 00:35:33,166 >> Jimmy: WHY ARE YOU TELLING ME THIS? I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THESE 566 00:35:33,166 --> 00:35:37,237 DETAILS AT ALL I'M GOING TO BLEEP THAT. >> AND THEN HOPEFULLY WE'LL 567 00:35:37,237 --> 00:35:41,141 ACHIEVE SIMULTANEOUS ORGASMS AT THE LAST - AT THE LAST SNIP 568 00:35:41,141 --> 00:35:43,243 >> Jimmy: ALL RIGHT. HERE IT COMES. >> GET THE BACK. 569 00:35:43,243 --> 00:35:46,079 >> Jimmy: HERE COMES THE -- I ALMOST WANT TO LEAVE THE BACK A LITTLE BIT, TOO, IF YOU DON'T 570 00:35:46,079 --> 00:35:50,650 MIND >> OH, MAN >> Jimmy: I JUST WANT TO GET 571 00:35:50,650 --> 00:35:55,388 THE LAST SNIP. JON, I THINK I DID A GOOD JOB. IN FACT, I THINK I DID A GREAT 572 00:35:55,388 --> 00:35:57,891 JOB. I LEFT A LITTLE -- I LEFT A LITTLE MADNESS IN THE BACK 573 00:35:57,891 --> 00:36:00,026 IF YOU WANT TO JUST TURN SIDEWAYS JUST TURN SIDEWAYS 574 00:36:00,026 --> 00:36:04,197 YEAH, THAT'S GOOD. [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE SO, IT'S A LITTLE -- 575 00:36:04,197 --> 00:36:05,765 [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE MADNESS. YEAH, I THINK THAT LOOKS GOOD 576 00:36:05,765 --> 00:36:08,168 RIGHT THERE. WE ALWAYS LOVE HAVING YOU ON ENJOY TONIGHT. 577 00:36:08,168 --> 00:36:13,039 JON GLASER, EVERYBODY. [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE "LIFE & BETH" PREMIERES THIS 578 00:36:13,039 --> 00:36:15,442 FRIDAY ON HULU MAE MULLER PERFORMS AFTER THE BREAK. 579 00:36:15,442 --> 00:36:35,228 STICK AROUND [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE * 580 00:36:35,228 --> 00:36:41,134 >> Jimmy: PERFORMING HER PLATINUM HIT, "BETTER DAYS," PLEASE WELCOME MAE MULLER. 581 00:36:41,134 --> 00:36:44,437 PLEASE WELCOME MAE MULLER. [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE 582 00:36:49,876 --> 00:37:02,255 * 583 00:37:02,255 --> 00:37:10,930 * I'VE BEEN FEELING LONEL I NEED SOMEONE TO HOLD M COME ON BABY HOLD ME 584 00:37:10,930 --> 00:37:16,369 I'VE BEEN FEELING * * JADED DON'T KNOW HOW SHOULD PLAY IT 585 00:37:16,369 --> 00:37:25,478 TELL ME HOW TO PLAY IT * * NOW YOU YOU'VE BEEN MOVING ON LET ME KNO 586 00:37:25,478 --> 00:37:31,217 CAN I COME ALONG * * SINCE YOU'RE GONE OH IT'S BEEN SO LONG 587 00:37:31,217 --> 00:37:41,061 ON MY OWN MY OWN * * MY OWN MY OWN LIVING IN A HAZE 588 00:37:41,061 --> 00:37:47,834 STAYING IN THE SHADE * * ALL I DO IS SIT AROUN AND WAIT FOR BETTER DAYS 589 00:37:47,834 --> 00:37:53,606 I COULD USE A BREAK * * CAN I GET AN AMEN ALL I DO IS SIT AROUND AND 590 00:37:53,606 --> 00:37:57,077 WAIT FOR BETTER DAYS * >> ARE WE HAVING A GOOD TIME OKAY 591 00:37:57,077 --> 00:38:13,026 * * I GOT STRUCK BY CUPID HE GOT ME FEELING STUPID 592 00:38:13,026 --> 00:38:16,029 I'M ABOUT TO LOOSE I OH I'M LIKE I WANNA * * LAY IN THE SU 593 00:38:16,029 --> 00:38:21,034 SMOKE IN MY LUNG TYING THE CHERRY STEM * * INTO A KNOT WITH MY TONGU 594 00:38:21,034 --> 00:38:26,473 I KNOW IT'S DUMB BUT IT IS BETTER THAN THAT * * NOW YOU YOU'VE BEEN 595 00:38:26,473 --> 00:38:32,345 MOVING ON LET ME KNO CAN I COME ALONG * * SINCE YOU'RE GONE 596 00:38:32,345 --> 00:38:38,885 OH IT'S BEEN SO LONG ON MY OWN MY OWN * * MY OWN MY OWN 597 00:38:38,885 --> 00:38:46,493 LIVIN' IN A HAZE STAYIN' IN THE SHADE ALL I DO IS SIT AROUND AND * 598 00:38:46,493 --> 00:38:53,900 * AND WAIT FOR BETTER DAY I COULD USE A BREA CAN I GET AN AME 599 00:38:53,900 --> 00:38:57,504 ALL I DO IS SIT AROUND * * AND WAIT FOR BETTER I SIT AROUND SIT AROUN 600 00:38:57,504 --> 00:39:08,848 SIT AROUND AND WAIT * * FOR BETTER BETTER BETTER DAYS I COUL 601 00:39:08,848 --> 00:39:14,454 USE A BREAK * * BETTER BETTER BETTE BETTER BETTER DAYS 602 00:39:14,454 --> 00:39:23,129 OH-OH * * ALL I DO IS SIT AROUN AND WAIT FOR BETTER DAYS 603 00:39:23,129 --> 00:39:30,036 BETTER DAYS * [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE * ALL I DO IS SIT AROUN 604 00:39:30,036 --> 00:39:40,714 AND WAIT FOR BETTER DAYS * [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE >> Jimmy: YES! 605 00:39:40,714 --> 00:39:45,885 THANK YOU SO MUCH! MAE MULLER [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE 606 00:39:45,885 --> 00:39:48,054 "BETTER DAYS." MAE MULLER IS OUT NOW. WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK, EVERYBODY 607 00:39:48,054 --> 00:40:16,282 WHOA [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE * 608 00:40:16,282 --> 00:40:20,220 >> Jimmy: MY THANKS TO MARISA TOMEI, JON GLASER MAE MULLER, RIGHT HERE ONCE 609 00:40:20,220 --> 00:40:22,989 AGAIN. FANTASTIC! [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE 610 00:40:22,989 --> 00:40:25,792 AND THE ROOTS RIGHT THERE FROM PHILADELPHIA, PENNSYLVANIA THANK YOU FOR WATCHING 611 00:40:25,792 --> 00:40:28,595 STAY TUNED FOR "LATE NIGHT WITH SETH MEYERS. GOODNIGHT, EVERYBODY 612 00:40:28,595 --> 00:40:28,595 GOODNIGHT, EVERYBODY THANK YOU! [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE