>> Steve: FROM STUDIO 6B IN ROCKEFELLER CENTER IN THE HEART
OF NEW YORK CITY, IT'S "THE TONIGHT SHOW STARRING JIMMY FALLON."
>> Steve: TONIGHT, JOIN JIMMY AND HIS GUESTS - JAMIE DORNAN, NICOLE BYER,
MUSICAL GUESTS, IMAGINE DRAGONS. AND FEATURING THE LEGENDARY
ROOTS CREW >> Questlove: 1591 >> Steve: AND NOW, HERE HE IS,
JIMMY FALLON
* *
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE >> Jimmy: THAT'S WHAT YOU WANT TO HEAR, RIGHT THERE
WELCOME, EVERYBODY WELCOME, WELCOME, WELCOME TO "THE TONIGHT SHOW.
THANKS FOR BEING HERE. THANKS FOR WATCHING. [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE
>> Jimmy: WELL, GUYS, EVERYONE WAS TALKING ABOUT THIS LAST NIGHT, AT THE END OF
A WHITE HOUSE PHOTO-OP, THE JOURNALISTS WEREN'T SUPPOSED TO ASK ANY QUESTIONS.
BUT FOX NEWS REPORTER PETER DOOCY ASKED WHETHER PRESIDENT BIDEN WHETHER
INFLATION WOULD HURT HIM IN THE MIDTERMS, AND A HOT MIC PICKED UP BIDEN'S RESPONSE.
WATCH THIS
A POLITICAL LIABILITY AHEAD OF THE MIDTERMS
>> NO, IT'S A GREAT ASSET. >> THANK YOU >> MORE INFLATION.
[ LAUGHTER ] WHAT A STUPID SON OF A A [ BLEEP ].
[ LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE * >> Jimmy: WHEN YOUR AGE IS
ALMOST 80 AND YOUR APPROVAL RATING'S ALMOST 30, YOU CAN PRETTY MUCH SAY WHATEVER YOU
WANT, I THINK. [ LAUGHTER ] HEY, LISTEN, IF BIDEN'S NEXT
THREE YEARS ARE GOING TO BE GRANDPA AT THANKSGIVING, SIGN ME UP.
I'M IN, I'M IN YOU CAN TELL THAT FELT GOOD FOR BIDEN, BECAUSE TODAY HE WAS
FIELDING QUESTIONS LIKE, "YEAH, THE MORON IN THE BACK. [ LAUGHTER ]
HOW ABOUT DOPEY IN THE CORNER, YOU GOT SOMETHING TO SAY?" THANKFULLY THERE WERE NO HARD
FEELINGS AND BIDEN EVEN CALLED DOOCY TO CLEAR THE AIR LISTEN TO THIS
FROM THE PRESIDENT WITHIN ABOUT AN HOUR OF THE SALTY EXCHANGE. BIDEN TELLING DOOCY, QUOTE,
"IT'S NOTHING PERSONAL, PAL. [ LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE >> Jimmy: THEN BIDEN SAID,
"I'LL SAY IT AGAIN REAL SLOW SO YOU CAN UNDERSTAND IT'S NOTHING PERSONAL, PAL."
I'M NOT SURE THAT EXCUSE REALLY FLIES. IT'S SORT OF UP THERE WITH,
"DON'T TAKE THIS THE WRONG WAY. "DON'T TAKE THIS THE WRONG WAY,
BUT YOU LOOK TIRED." I HATE WHEN PEOPLE TELL ME I LOOK TIRED
CAN WE JUST TAKE THAT OUT OF OUR VERNACULAR >> Questlove: YES.
>> Steve: WHY WOULD YOU SAY THAT >> Jimmy: WELL, ALSO -
>> Steve: "HEY, YOU LOOK BAD." [ LAUGHTER ] >> Jimmy: IT'S LIKE, "THANK
YOU. BUT ACTUALLY, I'M NOT TIRED. I SLEPT GREAT LAST NIGHT
THIS IS HOW I LOOK NOT TIRED >> Jimmy: OF COURSE, ALL OF THE NETWORKS WERE REPORTING ON THE
EXCHANGE BUT I SAW THAT THE FAR-RIGHT NETWORK OAN ACCIDENTALLY ADDED
INSULT TO INJURY FOR PETER DOOCY. TAKE A LOOK.
>> PRESIDENT BIDEN, THE UNITED STATES PRESIDENT CALLS FOR FOX NEWS WHITE HOUSE CORRESPONDENT,
PETER DOUCHEY, HE CALLED HIM, QUOTE, A STUPID SON OF A A [ BLEEP ].
[ LAUGHTER ] >> Jimmy: PETER DOUCHEY. PETER DOUCHEY.
BIDEN WAS LIKE, "THANKS, I'LL HAVE TO USE THAT ONE TOMORROW. I APPRECIATE IT.
THAT GUY WAS LIKE, "PETER DOUCHEY - I'M SORRY.
[ CLEARS THROAT PENIS DOUCHEY. I'M SORRY, BUT I CAN'T READ
THIS PETER DOOCY. PETER DOOCY ACTUALLY HEARD THAT
ANCHOR AND WAS LIKE, "YOU STUPID SOME OF A --" [ LAUGHTER ]
MEANWHILE, BIDEN IS ALREADY DEALING WITH ENOUGH AS TENSIONS CONTINUE TO RISE OVER A RUSSIAN
INVASION OF UKRAINE. THE DEPARTMENT OF HOMELAND SECURITY HAS WARNED THAT RUSSIA
COULD LAUNCH A CYBERATTACK AGAINST THE U.S. YEAH, THEY'RE BASING THIS ON
EVIDENCE FROM EVERY DAY FOR THE LAST 60 YEARS. [ LAUGHTER ]
BUT THE ATTACKS COULD BE SERIOUS. RUSSIA COULD CRIPPLE THE
ELECTRICAL GRID OR, WORSE, TURN OFF TIKTOK AMERICANS ARE LIKE, "JUST IN
CASE I'M CHANGING MY PASSWORD FROM 1234 TO 1234! [ LAUGHTER ]
THAT'S RIGHT [ APPLAUSE ] >> Jimmy: YEAH, AN ATTACK ON
OUR ELECTRICAL GRID WOULD GROUND COMMERCIAL FLIGHTS. SO AT UNITED, IT'LL BE PRETTY
MUCH BUSINESS AS USUAL [ LAUGHTER ] THEN, OF COURSE, FORMER
PRESIDENT TRUMP DECIDED TO WEIGH IN ON THE UKRAINE/RUSSIA CRISIS
IN A STATEMENT HE SAID THIS NEVER WOULD HAVE HAPPENED UNDER HIS ADMINISTRATION
YEAH, BECAUSE HE WOULD HAVE JUST CALLED PUTIN AND BEEN LIKE, "JUST TAKE IT.
[ LAUGHTER ] WHAT THE HELL DO I CARE? JUST TAKE IT."
>> Steve: "SIR." >> Jimmy: "YEAH, SIR?" TRUMP DIDN'T STOP THERE.
HE ALSO CLAIMED THAT UNDER HIS ADMINISTRATION THE GREEN M&M WOULD STILL BE SEXY.
[ LAUGHTER ] LET'S CHANGE GEARS I READ THAT THE SAT EXAM IS
GOING FULLY DIGITAL AND BEING SHORTENED FROM THREE HOURS TO TWO.
WOW, THAT'S LIKE -- THAT'S LIKE - SORRY, I DON'T HAVE AN ANALOGY,
I BOMBED ON THE VERBAL ON MY SATs I'M MORE OF A MATH GUY
[ LAUGHTER ] WHO CARES? I SIGNED MY NAME
I GOT 200 POINTS EVENTUALLY THE EXAM WILL JUST BE ONE QUESTION.
"DO YOU HAVE $200,000 TO PAY FOR COLLEGE? [ LAUGHTER ]
"NO. "PERFECT, COME ON IN." [ APPLAUSE ]
>> Jimmy: SOME BUSINESS NEWS TWITTER IS REPORTEDLY WORKING ON A CLOSE FRIENDS FEATURE THAT
WOULD LET USERS SHARE TWEETS WITH UP TO 150 PEOPLE. THAT STORY AGAIN
TWITTER IS INVENTING THE GROUP CHAT FROM HELL [ LAUGHTER ]
AND, FINALLY, A PUFFERFISH NAMED GOLDIE HAD TO UNDERGO EMERGENCY DENTAL WORK BECAUSE
HER TEETH WERE TOO BIG HERE SHE IS BEFORE AND AFTER LOOK AT THIS
[ LAUGHTER ] THE HARDEST PART WAS PUTTING ON THE LEAD VEST FOR THE X-RAY.
WHEN THE DENTIST SAID, YOU MAY EXPERIENCE SOME SWELLING THE PUFFERFISH WAS LIKE, "DON'T
TAKE THIS THE WRONG WAY, BUT I'M A PUFFERFISH I'M USED TO IT, YOU STUPID SON
OF A - THERE YOU GO WE HAVE A GREAT SHOW
GIVE IT UP FOR THE ROOTS, EVERYBODY.
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE
* >> Jimmy: OH, WHAT A SHOW WE
HAVE FOR YOU TONIGHT HE STARS IN THE MOVIE "BELFAST," WHICH IS GETTING ALL
SORTS OF AWARDS BUZZ IT WAS FANTASTIC OH, MY GOSH.
IT'S IN SELECT THEATERS AND ON DEMAND NOW JAMIE DORNAN IS HERE TONIGHT
>> Steve: YEAH [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE >> Steve: I LOVE IT.
>> Jimmy: HE KNOWS HOW TO DO IT, MAN. HE CAN ACT
PLUS, SHE STARS IN THE NEW HIT SITCOM, "GRAND CREW," WHICH AIRS TUESDAY NIGHTS ON NBC
NICOLE BYER IS HERE. [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE IT'S ON AFTER "THIS IS US.
SHE'S CRUSHING IT. AND WE GOT BRAND-NEW MUSIC FROM IMAGINE DRAGONS!
>> Steve: OH [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE >> Jimmy: THEN, LATER IN THE
SHOW, WE'RE CHECKING OUT MY LATEST "DO NOT READ LIST." >> Steve: OOH.
>> Jimmy: YEAH, THESE ARE BOOKS YOU SHOULD NOT READ. NO
[ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] >> Steve: UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES.
>> Jimmy: YEAH, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES. >> Steve: JUST DON'T READ THEM
>> Jimmy: THEY'RE COMING OUT LATER IN THE SHOW. BUT, RIGHT NOW, GUYS, IT IS
TIME TO LOOK AT THE STORIES MAKING HEADLINES TODAY AND WEIGH THE GOOD WITH THE
BAD. IT'S TIME FOR "PROS AND CONS." HERE WE GO
PROS AND CON AND PROS * [ CHEER AND APPLAUSE ]
>> Jimmy: TONIGHT, WE'LL BE TAKING A LOOK AT THE PROS AND CONS OF BIDEN'S FIRST YEAR IN
OFFICE HE JUST FINISHED UP HIS FIRST YEAR AS PRESIDENT.
A LOT HAS HAPPENED IN THAT TIME SO, LET'S LOOK AT THE PROS AND
CONS OF BIDEN'S FIRST YEAR IN OFFICE HERE WE GO
PRO, OVER 200 MILLION AMERICANS WERE VACCINATED. CON, THEY WERE ALL IN FRONT OF
YOU IN LINE AT CVS [ LAUGHTER ] "LET'S TRY THE SELF-CHECKOUT."
PRO, HIS SWEARING-IN CEREMONY WAS A YEAR AGO CON, HIS SWEARING-AT CEREMONY
WAS YESTERDAY. [ LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE "STUPID SON --
>> Steve: PETER DOUCHEY. [ LAUGHTER ] >> Jimmy: IT'S DOOCY
>> Steve: OH IT'S NOT -- IT'S DOOCY? >> Jimmy: YEAH, THAT'S CORRECT
>> Jimmy: PRO, HOSPITAL DEATHS CAUSED BY OMICRON ARE PLUMMETING
CON, TV DEATHS CAUSED BY PELOTON ARE SKYROCKETING [ LAUGHTER ]
>> Steve: THIS GUY DIED -- WHAT'S GOING ON? >> Steve: COME ON.
>> Jimmy: THERE'S GOT TO BE OTHER WAYS TO DIE. PRO, HE WANTS TO CREATE
A LASTING LEGACY CON, OR AT LEAST MAKE BIDEN A WORDLE ANSWER.
[ LAUGHTER ] THAT'S COOL. PRO, HE YOU GOT TOM HANKS TO DO
A PRO-AMERICA PSA. CON, HE GOT WILSON THE VOLLEYBALL TO RUN THE CDC.
[ LAUGHTER ] IS THAT WHAT'S HAPPENING >> Steve: YEAH
WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT? >> Jimmy: PRO, WENT AFTER THE INSURANCE COMPANIES.
CON, HE CALLED THE GEICO GECKO A STUPID SON OF A -- [ LAUGHTER ]
WHY? >> Steve: WHY WOULD HE DO THAT >> Jimmy: WHY?
PRO, BIDEN HAS FORGIVEN MORE THAN $13 BILLION IN STUDENT LOAN DEBT.
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE CON, WHICH SHOULD COVER THE PRICE OF ABOUT THREE TEXTBOOKS
[ LAUGHTER ] $2 >> Steve: WHAT
THAT'S NOT ENOUGH FOR A BEER >> Jimmy: YEAH, I'M PAYING 400 BUCKS FOR EACH ONE OF
THESE. YEAH, AT LEAST GET ME A BEER, MAN.
>> Jimmy: PRO, BIDEN TURNED 79 CON, WHICH EXPLAINS WHY HIS APPROVAL RATING HAS FALLEN AND
IT CAN'T GET UP. [ LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE *
>> Steve: OY CLAP ON. PRO, BIDEN IS HOPING TO IMPROVE
HIS IMAGE THIS YEAR. CON, WHICH EXPLAINS HIS NEW CABINET MEMBERS, JONATHAN,
BOBBY, TAN, ANTONI AND KARAMO. WOW! [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE
AND FINALLY, PRO, PEOPLE WONDER IF BIDEN IS GETTING TOO OLD FOR ANOTHER TERM
CON, EVEN TOM BRADY IS LIKE "GOT TO KNOW WHEN TO PACK IT IN, BRO.
THERE YOU HAVE IT. THOSE ARE THE PROS AND CONS. WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK WITH "DO
NOT READ." STICK AROUND, EVERYBODY. [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE
* >> OCCASIONALLY WE'D TAKE A BREAK TO LISTEN TO THE
SOUNDTRACK FOR "ENCANTO. THAT'S OUR -- YEAH >> Jimmy: I MEAN, THAT'S WHAT
EVERYONE'S DOING RIGHT NOW >> RIGHT, THAT'S WHAT EVERYONE'S DOING
>> Jimmy: THAT REPRESENTS EVERYONE
EVERYBODY. THANK YOU FOR WATCHING "THE TONIGHT SHOW."
I'M ABOUT TO SHOW YOU SOME BOOKS THAT YOU SHOULD AVOID AT ALL COSTS.
IT'S TIME FOR THE LATEST INSTALLMENT OF MY DO NOT READ LIST
HERE WE GO
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE * DO NOT READ
DO NOT REA DO NOT READ THESE BOOKS * >> Jimmy: NOW BEFORE WE START,
I JUST WANT YOU TO KNOW THAT EVERY BOOK THAT I'M ABOUT TO SHOW YOU IS 100 PERCENT REAL
THESE ARE ACTUAL BOOKS THAT -- YOU CAN FIND THEM ON AMAZON OR CHECK THEM OUT AT YOUR LOCAL
LIBRARY. THEY ARE REAL. ALL RIGHT, LET'S SEE WHAT'S ON
MY DO NOT READ LIST. FIRST ONE IS A JOKE BOOK >> Steve: OH, GREAT.
I LOVE JOKES >> Jimmy: YEAH, THAT'S RIGHT UP MY ALLEY
THIS ONE IS CALLED "THE HUMOUR OF GERMANY." [ LAUGHTER ]
IT WAS A HILARIOUS COVER ALREADY, THE COVER'S FUNNY >> Steve: WHAT YEAR WAS -- I
JUST WANT TO KNOW WHAT YEAR THAT'S FROM. [ LAUGHTER ]
>> Jimmy: THEY HAVE SOME CLASSICS IN HERE >> Steve: OH, OKAY
>> Jimmy: YEAH, HERE, HOW ABOUT THIS CLASSIC RIGHT HERE. A CHAPTER -- "THE INCARCERATION
OF HERR PROFESSOR. [ LAUGHTER ] THAT WAS HILARIOUS
I'LL GIVE IT A READ. >> Steve: IT'S FUNNY >> Jimmy: NEXT UP IS A
A COOKBOOK >> Steve: OH, I LOVE COOKBOOKS >> Jimmy: I HAVE A GREAT
COLLECTION OF COOKBOOKS. >> Steve: YOU DO >> Jimmy: YEAH
THIS ONE IS "500 TASTY SANDWICH RECIPES. >> Steve: MMM.
>> Jimmy: LOOK HOW TASTY THAT ONE LOOKS. [ LAUGHTER ]
[ AUDIENCE OHS ] >> Steve: OH WOW.
WHAT THAT'S A SANDWICH? >> Jimmy: A GOOD ASPARAGUS
SANDWICH >> Steve: MM >> Jimmy: OPEN FACE.
>> Steve: OH, PUT IT IN THE TOASTER OVEN >> Jimmy: NAME WHAT SANDWICH
THAT IS. [ LAUGHTER ] >> Steve: OH
>> Jimmy: THERE'S A SURPRISE AT THE END. WHAT DO THEY HAVE IN HERE?
>> Steve: IT'S CALLED DA LAUNDRY LINT >> Jimmy: YEAH
[ LAUGHTER ] OH, MY GOODNESS. LOOK AT THIS
THEY HAM AND PEANUT BUTTER SANDWICH >> Steve: OH
>> Jimmy: HAM AND RAISIN POTTED MEAT. [ LAUGHTER ]
>> Steve: MM, TASTY. >> Jimmy: THAT'S PRETTY GOOD POTTED MEAT, YEAH.
NEXT UP IS AN ACTIVITY BOOK FOR KIDS >> Steve: OH, GREAT.
>> Jimmy: IT'S CALLED "101 THINGS FOR GIRLS TO DO. >> Steve: MM-HM.
[ LAUGHTER ] >> Jimmy: I HAVE GIRLS THIS MIGHT BE GREAT FOR THEM
>> Steve: WHAT CAN THEY DO >> Jimmy: LET'S SEE WHAT THEY CAN DO
HOW TO SHARPEN SCISSORS. [ LAUGHTER ] >> Steve: WHAT
AND THEN RUN WITH THEM >> Jimmy: YEAH THERE'S OTHER THINGS TO DO
NEXT UP IS A TRAVEL BOOK >> Steve: OH, I LOVE TRAVEL.
>> Jimmy: A LOT OF PEOPLE ARE LOOKING FORWARD TO JUST GETTING OUT THERE TRAVELING, PEOPLE WHO
ARE LOOKING TO TAKE A FAMILY ROAD TRIP. CHECK THIS OUT HERE.
THIS IS CALLED "NUCLEAR HEARTLAND: A GUIDE TO THE 1,000 MISSILE SILOS OF THE
UNITED STATES. [ LAUGHTER ] >> Steve: OH
I CAN'T WAIT >> Jimmy: LET'S TAKE A LOOK INSIDE HERE.
THIS ONE SAYS A FAMILY OUTING HERE IT SAYS A FAMILY OUTING.
"WE SAT, MY WIFE, OUR THREE CHILDREN, MYSELF, AND OUR DOG. A FEW HUNDRED FEET AWAY WAS
A MINUTE MAN MISSILE TIPPED WITH A WARHEAD CONTAINING AN EXPLOSIVE FORCE OF 1.2 MILLION
TONS OF TNT. IT HUMMED DURING THE NIGHT." SOUNDS LIKE A DREAM FAMILY -
YOU WON'T FORGET THAT VACATION TOO SOON >> Steve: NO, IT'LL BE -- EVERY
TIME THE CHILD CLOSES HIS EYES, THEY'LL REMEMBER THAT VACATION [ LAUGHTER ]
"WHY AM I RADIOACTIVE? [ LAUGHTER ] >> Jimmy: ALL RIGHT.
NEXT IS A COOKBOOK CALLED "COOKING WITH COKE." >> Steve: OH, IT'S BY DON JR.?
[ LAUGHTER ] >> Jimmy: NO, IT'S - *
NO, THE SOFT -- COOKING WITH -- COOKING WITH COKE. YEAH, HERE WE GO
COOKING WITH COCA-COLA >> Steve: COCA-COLA, OKAY. >> Jimmy: COOKING WITH COKE.
>> Steve: MY MISTAKE >> Jimmy: COOKING WITH COKE. >> Steve: I FEEL LIKE A REAL
PETER DOOCY. [ LAUGHTER ] >> Jimmy: HERE IS THE RECIPE
HERE'S SWEET AND SPICY SHRIMP TACOS WITH MANGO SALSA >> Steve: MM
>> Jimmy: I DON'T KNOW ABOUT THE MANGO SALSA. I DON'T WANT THE MANGO
OVERPOWERING THE SHRIMP AND COKE [ LAUGHTER ]
THAT'S JUST A COMBO. >> Steve: YEAH >> Jimmy: THAT'S UP THERE WITH,
LIKE, HAM AND RAISINS. [ LAUGHTER ] >> Steve: YEAH, I LOVE HAM,
RAISINS, AND COKE. >> Jimmy: WE'RE DOWN TO OUR LAST BOOK.
IT'S A SELF-HELP BOOK. >> Steve: OH, I LOVE SELF-HELP >> Jimmy: YEAH
THIS IS CALLED "A GUIDED MEDITATION FOR BEGINNERS." >> Steve: OH, THAT'S GREAT
>> Jimmy: WE COULD ALL USE THIS RIGHT NOW. >> Steve: YEAH
>> Jimmy: LET'S SEE WHAT TIPS THEY HAVE FOR US HERE. >> Steve: OKAY WHAT'S PAGE ONE
>> Jimmy: HERE WE GO FIRST PAGE SAYS, "INHALE." [ LAUGHTER ]
NEXT ONE SAYS "EXHALE." >> Steve: OKAY. >> Jimmy: IT'S THE WHOLE BOOK.
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE THAT'S ALL THE TIME WE HAVE FOR "DO NOT READ."
IF YOU HAVE A BOOK YOU THINK SHOULD BE ON OUR NEXT DO NOT READ LIST, SEND YOUR TITLE TO
DONOTREAD@TONIGHTSHOW.COM. STICK AROUND WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK WITH
JAMIE DORNAN, EVERYBODY. [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE *
>> Jimmy: OUR FIRST GUEST IS A A VERY, VERY TALENTED ACTOR WHO STARS IN THE MOVIE, "BELFAST,"
WHICH IS IN SELECT THEATERS AND ON DEMAND RIGHT NOW. LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, PLEASE
WELCOME JAMIE DORNAN
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE *
>> Jimmy: THAT'S A MOVIE STAR! THAT'S A STUD RIGHT THERE.
WELCOME. IT IS GREAT TO SEE YOU THANK YOU FOR BEING HERE IN
PERSON I APPRECIATE THAT. >> WELL, IT'S VERY NICE TO BE
HERE IN PERSON THANK YOU. >> Jimmy: HOW ARE -- HOW ARE
THE FAMILY HOW ARE THE KIDS >> THEY'RE GOOD.
>> Jimmy: YEAH >> THEY -- THEIR THING AT THE MOMENT IS JUST SCREAMING
[ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] >> Jimmy: AH, THAT SOUNDS PEACEFUL
[ LAUGHTER ] >> THEY'RE, LIKE, REALLY GOOD AT IT, YOU KNOW.
>> Jimmy: YEAH >> BUT IT'S ALL -- YOU KNOW, LIKE, OUR 8-YEAR-OLD, I FEEL
LIKE SHE IS GOING THROUGH SOME KIND OF -- APPARENTLY, WE'VE SINCE FOUND OUT AROUND EIGHT,
THEY GET SOME HORMONAL SURGE >> Jimmy: WOW. >> AND SHE IS JUST, LIKE,
GUTTURAL, SCREAMING A LOT. >> Jimmy: YEAH >> WHICH ENCOURAGES THE
2-YEAR-OLD WHO IS DOING THAT ANYWAY IN THEIR OWN, KIND OF, WAY.
>> Jimmy: YEAH >> YOU KNOW? AND THE 5-YEAR-OLD SITS IN THE
MIDDLE JUST LIKE GOING, "I MAY AS WELL JOIN IN. >> Jimmy: YEAH
>> YOU KNOW, YEAH. >> Jimmy: AND YOU ARE JUST DRIVING GOING, "THIS IS
AWESOME. [ LAUGHTER ] >> BUT OCCASIONALLY, WE TAKE A
A BREAK TO LISTEN TO THE SOUNDTRACK FOR "ENCANTO. [ LAUGHTER ]
THAT'S OUR -- YEAH >> Jimmy: I MEAN, THAT'S WHAT EVERYONE IS DOING RIGHT NOW.
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE >> YEAH, THAT'S WHAT - >> Jimmy: THAT IS -- THAT
REPRESENTS EVERYONE. >> UH-HUH. >> Jimmy: IT'S SCREAMING AND
"ENCANTO" RIGHT NOW. >> I GET IT. I GET IT, IT'S MUSIC
>> Jimmy: WE DON'T TALK ABOUT BRUNO. YEAH, I MEAN, COME ON.
>> YEAH, WE WILL WE MIGHT TALK ABOUT BRUNO. >> Jimmy: EXACTLY.
YEAH, YEAH >> WE'RE -- WE'RE ALLOWED TO TALK ABOUT IT.
>> Jimmy: WE'RE ALLOWED TO -- YEAH >> YEAH.
>> Jimmy: SPEAKING OF SEEING, BY THE WAY >> YEAH.
>> Jimmy: I SAW A REAL COOL THING. >> YEAH.
>> Jimmy: YOU WERE SINGING "RAINBOW CONNECTION. >> I WAS
>> Jimmy: IN THE "KERMIT THE FROG" VOICE. >> YEAH.
>> Jimmy: I HAVE IT HERE CAN WE JUST SHOW IT?
SONGS ABOUT RAINBOWS
WHAT'S ON THE OTHER SIDE * [ LAUGHTER ] [ CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
>> Jimmy: NAILED IT! NAILED IT! >> YEAH.
>> Jimmy: IT LOOKS LIKE -- ALL RIGHT, YOU MIGHT BE SINGING TO YOUR GIRLS THERE AND --
>> I'M NOT THAT'S SAD, I'M NOT. [ LAUGHTER ]
>> Jimmy: YOU'RE NOT >> I'M JUST SINGING TO MY GROOMER BEFORE I GO ON ANOTHER
TALK SHOW. >> Jimmy: IS THAT RIGHT? >> YEAH.
>> Jimmy: THERE WERE NO KIDS IN THE ROOM >> NO.
I'M NOT EVEN SURE MY KIDS HAVE SEEN THAT. [ LAUGHTER ]
THEY JUST LIKE -- YEAH >> Jimmy: WELL, YOU JUST -- >> I WAS -- I WAS MUCKING
AROUND WITH A GUITAR AND I WAS JUST -- I -- I'VE ALWAYS LOVED THAT SONG, YOU KNOW, SO I WAS
SINGING THAT SONG ANYWAY AND I REALIZED I COULD SING IT LIKE KERMIT
[ LAUGHTER ] >> Jimmy: I LOVE THAT YOU COULD DO SOMETHING LIKE THAT BUT THEN
YOU COULD ALSO DO "BELFAST." I MEAN YOU ARE KIND OF DOING EVERYTHING
>> WELL, THAT'S THE IDEA, ISN'T IT >> Jimmy: YEAH, I GUESS THAT'S
THE FUN OF ACTING, YEAH. IT'S -- CONGRATS IT IS GETTING GREAT REVIEWS.
IT HAS BEEN NOMINATED FOR EVERY AWARD I CAN THINK OF YOU ARE GETTING OSCAR BUZZ
THAT MUST BE EXCITING. I MEAN, I KNOW IT'S -- YOU GOING AROUND AND YOU'RE ON ALL
OF THE -- THE LISTS AND EVERYTHING LIKE THAT, BUT FOR ANYONE WHO HASN'T SEEN
"BELFAST," CAN YOU SET IT UP WHAT IT'S ABOUT? >> YEAH.
YEAH, SO IT'S -- OUR WRITER/DIRECTOR SIR KENNETH BRANAGH --
>> Jimmy: BRANAGH. AWESOME. >> IT'S JUST LEGENDRY.
>> Jimmy: YEAH >> IT IS, SORT OF, SEMI-AUTOBIOGRAPHICAL ABOUT
HIS -- HIS CHILDHOOD GROWING UP IN BELFAST A LOT OF PEOPLE DON'T REALIZE
HE HAS ANY CONNECTION TO IRELAND. BUT HE WAS BROUGHT UP IN
BELFAST. SORT OF -- WE GO FROM 1969 WHEN HE WAS NINE YEARS OLD
AND FOLLOW THE BEGINNING OF THE CONFLICT WHICH WOULD GO ON FOR 30 YEARS, WE KNOW WHEN IT HAS
THE TROUBLESAND IT'S - SORT OF, A 9-YEAR-OLD BOY'S ACCOUNT OF HIS FAMILY AND HOW
THEY WERE DEALING WITH THAT SITUATION AT THAT TIME >> Jimmy: NOW YOU WERE -- YOU
WERE BORN AND RAISED IN BELFAST? >> YEP
>> Jimmy: AND I READ THAT YOU WERE THE ONLY ACTOR THAT KENNETH CONSIDERED FOR THE
ROLE DOES IT -- THAT'S GOT TO FEEL GOOD
>> HE'S LOST HIS MIND. [ LAUGHTER ] >> Jimmy: YEAH
I MEAN THAT'S -- IT'S -- HAVE YOU EVER MET KENNETH BRANAGH BEFORE
COME CLOSE TO WORKING WITH HIM >> I DID AUDITION FOR "THOR" WHEN HE DIRECTED "THOR" WAY
BACK WHEN. BUT I -- YOU KNOW, I'D -- I'VE TALKED TO KEN ABOUT -- I DON'T
EVEN THINK HE SAW MY TAPE, IT WAS THAT BAD [ LAUGHTER ]
BUT, YOU KNOW, I -- >> Jimmy: DID YOU PLAY THOR? >> NO, NO -- LIKE, NO.
I DON'T KNOW, ONE OF THE GUYS. HE -- >> Jimmy: ONE OF HIS BUDDIES
>> YEAH, ONE OF HIS, YOU KNOW -- >> Jimmy: YEAH, YEAH, YEAH
>> SMALLER BUDDIES, I THINK. [ LAUGHTER ] BUT -- BUT KEN, I GREW UP WITH
A PICTURE OF KENNETH BRANAGH ON OUR BOOKSHELF OF HIM AND MY DAD.
MY DAD WAS A PROFESSOR OF MEDICINE, AND HE -- HE OPENED A MATERNITY WARD AT THE
HOSPITAL MY DAD SPENT THE MAJORITY OF HIS CAREER AT. SO THERE'S A PICTURE OF MY DAD
WITH KENNETH BRANAGH AND A A COUPLE OF OTHER DOCTORS ALWAYS IN MY -- IN MY HOUSE.
>> Jimmy: REALLY >> YEAH, IT WAS COOL FILLED IT UP FULL CIRCLE
>> Jimmy: I -- I LOVED IT. OBVIOUSLY, I'M IRISH, FALLON >> YEP
>> Jimmy: BUT I LOVED IT BECAUSE IT WAS A DIFFERENT TYPE OF IRISH MOVIE THAT YOU WOULD
SEE OUT THERE AND, LIKE -- YOU, KIND OF GO LIKE, "I HAVE -- I LOVED THAT
I APPRECIATED IT." BUT IT IS REALLY JUST A FAMILY IS WHAT IT WAS REALLY ABOUT.
>> YEAH, AND I THINK THAT'S WHY IT HAS RESONATED SO WELL YOU KNOW, WE ARE MAKING A MOVIE
ABOUT A TINY PLACE ON A TINY ISLAND THAT PEOPLE DON'T REALLY KNOW THAT MUCH ABOUT REALLY,
EVEN THOUGH WE HAVE SPREAD OURSELVES PRETTY FAR, THE IRISH.
BUT, YOU KNOW, WE -- IT IS AT A PARTICULAR POINT IN TIME, BUT IT IS ESSENTIALLY, AS YOU SAID,
IT IS ABOUT A FAMILY AND IT IS ABOUT FAMILY DEALING WITH CRISIS AND -- AND WE CAN ALL --
EVERY SINGLE PERSON HERE CAN UNDERSTAND THAT. >> Jimmy: YEAH
DOES IT -- THERE'S A PART OF THE MOVIE TOWARDS THE MIDDLE, TOWARDS THE END, BUT YOU END UP
JUST SINGING -- * EVERLASTING LOV THEN YOU REALIZE *
AND IT WAS -- STILL, IT WAS SUCH A GREAT SONG. BUT IT'S AT THE PERFECT PART OF
THE MOVIE BECAUSE -- IT'S BEEN SUCH A TOUGH THING TO WATCH.
AND THAT SCENE TO ME WAS MY SCENE BECAUSE I -- I LOVED IT BECAUSE I SAW YOU GUYS WERE
JUST IN LOVE >> YEAH, LISTEN, IT'S BEEN A A LOVELY -- THE RESPONSE TO
THAT SCENE HAS BEEN INCREDIBLE AND LIKE FOR US, IT'S A MOMENT OF ESCAPISM AND -- AND A
A RELEASE THAT YOU, KIND OF, NEED AT THAT POINT IN THE FILM BUT ALSO, LIKE, IT IS
ESSENTIALLY ABOUT THROUGH THE MEDIUM OF SONG THESE TWO CENTRAL CHARACTERS,
THROUGH MY CHARACTER -- WIFE -- LOOK, WE ARE GOING THROUGH THE WRINGER HERE
THIS IS TOUGH BUT I'VE GOT YOU DON'T WORRY. I'VE GOT YOU
I LOVE YOU IT IS GOING TO BE OKAY AND THAT'S NOT CHANGING.
SO THAT'S -- >> Jimmy: THAT'S WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT IT
YEAH, WAS IT -- IS IT NERVE-RACKING TO JUST SING AND JUST DANCE AND --
>> YEAH, I'VE BEEN DOING IT TOO MUCH RECENTLY. >> Jimmy: KERMIT THE FROG.
GETTING IN THERE, YEAH >> YEAH, I MEAN, THAT'S A CHOICE, A BAD CHOICE, BUT,
YOU KNOW, I -- THE LAST FEW THINGS I ENDED UP SINGING. BUT I THINK I KNOW WHAT I'M
DOING NEXT AND I KNOW I DON'T SING IN IT SO WE ARE ALL GOING TO BE SPARED
[ LAUGHTER ] >> Jimmy: YEAH I WANT TO TALK MORE ABOUT THE
MOVIE AND SHOW A CLIP WHEN WE COME BACK. MORE WITH JAMIE DORNAN AFTER
THE BREAK. COME ON BACK, EVERYBODY. [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE
* * OH THE MISERY EVERYBODY WANTS TO
BE MY ENEMY * * SPARE THE SYMPATH EVERYBODY WANTS TO
>> Jimmy: WELCOME BACK JAMIE DORNAN IS JOINING US RIGHT HERE
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE WE'RE TALKING ABOUT HIS NEW MOVIE, "BELFAST.
YOU KNOW, THERE WAS A BIG PREMIERE FOR "BELFAST" IN BELFAST.
>> YEP >> Jimmy: WHAT WAS THAT LIKE >> LISTEN, IT WAS ONE OF THE
BEST NIGHTS OF MY LIFE IT WAS -- I -- I FELT LIKE VOMITING FOR THE WHOLE DAY,
LIKE, I HAVE NEVER -- I GET NERVOUS BEFORE, KIND OF, EVERYTHING -- THIS
EVERYTHING -- EVEN THIS. [ LAUGHTER ] >> Jimmy: YEAH
>> NO, I REALLY GET, LIKE, A A SICK FEELING IN MY STOMACH WHEN YOU ARE ABOUT TO PUT
SOMETHING OUT THERE LIKE THAT AND -- BUT PARTICULARLY FOR THE -- DOING IT FOR THE PEOPLE
OF HOME, YOU KNOW. THIS -- THIS MOVIE MEANS SO MUCH TO THEM
>> Jimmy: IS THERE FAMILY AND FRIENDS THERE? >> BUT WE GOT A GREAT -- WE GOT
FAMILY AND SOME OF MY BEST MATES THERE. I'M 1,400, YOU KNOW, PEOPLE
FROM BELFAST SO IT WAS A A SPECIAL NIGHT. >> Jimmy: WOW.
>> YEAH, IT WAS CLASS. YEAH >> Jimmy: I GOT TO SAY THE CAST
WAS AMAZING AND THE CHEMISTRY, BUT THAT LITTLE -- THE LITTLE KID.
>> STOP. >> Jimmy: WHAT -- JUDE HILL. >> YEAH, JUDE HILL
HE'S INCREDIBLE. HE'S ONLY -- >> Jimmy: IT'S GOT TO BE HIS
FIRST. >> IT'S HIS FIRST EVER AND I THINK -- YEAH, HE -- HE'D
DONE A LOT OF IRISH DANCING. THAT WAS ONLY, SORT OF, PERFORMATIVE THING THAT HE'D
DONE, AND HE JUST STEALS EVERY SCENE AS YOU -- AS YOU'VE NOTICED.
>> Jimmy: HE'S SO -- >> INCREDIBLE. HIS FACE, MAN.
HIS FACE >> Jimmy: CUTE EVERYTHING ABOUT HIM
YOU'RE LIKE, "OH, MY GOSH. DID HE LOVE IT >> AND HE'S REALLY CHEEKY.
HE'S REALLY CHEEKY >> Jimmy: HE IS, RIGHT >> YEAH.
>> Jimmy: OH, REALLY -- >> BUT I KEEP TELLING HIM TO EMBRACE IT
YOU NEED THAT TO GET THROUGH LIFE, I THINK. >> Jimmy: EXACTLY RIGHT.
[ LAUGHTER ] YEAH, YOU GOT TO BE -- YOU GOT TO BE SILLY, MAN
>> YEAH. >> Jimmy: ABSOLUTELY YEAH
AND THEN YOU HAVE JUDI DENCH >> YEAH. >> Jimmy: HITTING A HOMER.
>> YEAH. >> Jimmy: LIKE SHE WOULDN'T. BUT I MEAN --
>> NO -- I KNOW. WELL, WHEN I SIGNED ON, IT WAS ONLY JUDI DENCH ATTACHED, AT
THAT POINT I WAS LIKE, "I DON'T NEED TO READ THE SCRIPT, LIKE, I'M
DOING IT." >> Jimmy: YEAH >> "I DON'T CARE."
>> Jimmy: YEAH YEAH, NO MATTER WHAT IT IS >> I DON'T CARE WHAT I'M DOING
IN A JUDI DENCH FILM, BUT, LIKE - >> Jimmy: BUT I'M DOING IT
>> IF I'M PLAYING HER SON, I'M DEFINITELY DOING IT. YOU KNOW
SO -- >> Jimmy: WHAT A GREAT LOOK SHE HAD, TOO
>> INCREDIBLE. >> Jimmy: THEY DID A GREAT JOB -- HAIR AND MAKEUP
>> YEAH, SHE IS AMAZING. >> Jimmy: IS SHE JUST AWESOME TO BE AROUND
>> SHE'S, LIKE, CIARAN HINDS, WHO PLAYS MY DAD IN IT, HE SUMS HER UP PERFECTLY
HE SAYS SHE'S A REBEL. SHE DOES -- SHE HAS THIS, LIKE, REBELLIOUS, LIKE, CHEEKY, LIKE,
MISCHIEVOUS SIDE TO HER. AND SHE'S, LIKE, 87, JUDI. YOU KNOW --
>> Jimmy: YEAH >> AND SHE JUST -- SHE COMES READY TO PLAY.
YOU KNOW, IT'S VERY FUN TO BE AROUND >> Jimmy: I FEEL LIKE I WOULD
JUST ASK HER ANY QUESTION JUST TO HAVE HER TELL ME SOMETHING. >> YEAH, I --
>> Jimmy: "YEAH, I'M GOING TO HAVE COFFEE. SHOULD I PUT ANYTHING IN IT?
WHAT DO YOU THINK, JUDI? [ LAUGHTER ] >> SHE WILL NEVER STEER YOU THE
WRONG WAY. >> Jimmy: RIGHT? >> NO, NO.
>> Jimmy: SHE WON'T? >> SHE'S INCREDIBLE. INCREDIBLE WOMAN
>> Jimmy: CLASS. CLASS ACT. I WANT TO SHOW EVERYONE A CLIP
HERE IS JAMIE DORNAN IN "BELFAST." TAKE A LOOK AT THIS.
>> THESE BOYS ARE SUFFERING. I DON'T THINK WE'VE GOT UNTIL EASTER
[ THUNDERCLAPS ] I DON'T THINK YOU AND ME HAVE GOT UNTIL EASTER EITHER.
>> I HAVE COME HOME. WE'LL FIGHT THIS TOGETHER. >> KIDS THE SAME AGE AS OURS
ARE GETTING KILLED OR IN THE QUARTER. >> WELL -- WELL, BE CAREFUL.
>> YOU CAN'T BE WITH THEM 24 HOURS A DAY YOU CAN'T TAKE AWAY THEIR
CHILDHOOD EITHER [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE >> Jimmy: JAMIE DORNAN,
EVERYBODY. "BELFAST" IS IN SELECT THEATERS AND ON DEMAND NOW.
NICOLE BYER JOINS US NEXT. STICK AROUND, EVERYBODY. COME ON BACK
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE * >> Jimmy: OUR NEXT GUEST IS AN
EMMY-NOMINATED COMEDIAN AND ACTRESS WHO STARS IN THE NEW NBC SHOW, "GRAND CREW," WHICH
AIRS TUESDAY NIGHTS AT 8:30. PLEASE WELCOME NICOLE BYER
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE
>> HI, HI, HI! >> Jimmy: WELCOME TO THE SHOW. IT IS SO NICE TO SEE YOU
IT'S SO NICE TO MEET YOU >> IT'S SO NICE TO MEET YOU. HONESTLY, WHAT A TREAT
>> Jimmy: EVERYONE AROUND THE OFFICE LOVES YOU AND I GO, "YEAH.
THEY GO, "BUT FOR ALL DIFFERENT REASONS. THEY GO, "I KNOW HER FROM HER
STAND-UP HER SPECIALS ARE UNBELIEVABLE. I GO, "YEAH, THAT'S HOW I KNOW
HER. THEY GO, "THEN ALSO SHE'S ON -- CO-HOSTS 'WIPEOUT' WITH
JOHN CENA. I GO, "OH, YEAH, SHE DOES. AND THEN SOMEONE'S LIKE, "NO,
NO, HER PODCAST IS LIKE -- UNBELIEVABLE." THEN SOMEONE GOES, "NO, SHE'S
ON A DIFFERENT PODCAST." THEN I GO, "SHE'S ON 'GRAND CREW.'" >> YEAH, I'M TIRED
[ LAUGHTER ] YES, I'M EXHAUSTED >> Jimmy: I MEAN WOW, YOU ARE
KICKING BUTT RIGHT NOW >> YEAH, IT'S REALLY NICE. I GET RECOGNIZED A LOT BY,
LIKE, LITTLE KIDS FOR "NAILED IT," WHICH IS WEIRD BECAUSE I TALK ABOUT NON-CHILD STUFF IN
MY STAND-UP. [ LAUGHTER ] >> Jimmy: OKAY, YEAH, CAN YOU
TELL WHAT PEOPLE KNOW YOU FROM WHAT SHOWS >> OOH, YEAH, IF IT'S A GAY
MAN, IT'S "WHY WON'T YOU DATE ME?" WHICH IS MY PODCAST ABOUT WHY I'M SINGLE
[ LAUGHTER ] BUT PEOPLE LOVE YELLING "NAILED IT" AT ME, AND I WAS TELLING
THIS TO JOHN CENA, I WAS LIKE, "OH, MY GOD, IT'S SO AWFUL THEY'RE JUST SCREAMING 'NAILED
IT' AT ME. AND HE SAID, "NICOLE, PEOPLE ARE JUST TRYING TO IDENTIFY
WITH YOU, COME TO YOU, HAVE A COMMONALITY WITH YOU." AND I WAS LIKE, "HUH, YOU ARE
A WISE, WISE WRESTLING MAN." [ LAUGHTER ] >> Jimmy: HE IS A VERY WISE
MAN. >> HE IS >> Jimmy: IT'S UNBELIEVABLE.
>> HE'S SO SWEET >> Jimmy: IS IT TRUE THAT PEOPLE'S KIDS HAVE GOTTEN YOU
JOBS >> OKAY. THEY HAVEN'T GOTTEN ME JOBS.
THEY'VE GOTTEN ME AUDITIONS. >> Jimmy: OKAY >> SO SOMETIMES CASTING
DIRECTORS WILL BE LIKE, "OH, MY GOD, MY KID LOVES YOU SO MUCH THAT WE WERE LIKE, 'LET'S BRING
YOU IN AND NOT BOOK YOU ON IT.'" [ LAUGHTER ] >> YEAH, I LOVE DRIVING TO
SANTA MONICA IN THE MIDDLE OF RUSH HOUR TO MAKE YOU LAUGH. [ LAUGHTER ]
>> Jimmy: YOU HOST -- HOW MANY PODCASTS DO YOU HOST, FOUR >> FOUR, YEAH.
>> Jimmy: YEAH AND RIGHT NOW YOU'RE UP FOR BEST FEMALE HOST AT THE
iHEARTRADIO PODCAST AWARDS >> YES >> Jimmy: LAST YEAR --
CONGRATULATIONS. [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE >> THANK YOU
>> Jimmy: LAST YEAR, YOU BEAT OUT -- YOU BEAT MICHELLE OBAMA >> I KNOW, ISN'T THAT WILD
>> Jimmy: I LOVE THAT. HOW EXCITING IS THAT >> I KNOW.
I THINK IT'S JUST PEOPLE IDENTIFYING WITH A DESPERATE WOMAN, YOU KNOW?
"I'M JUST LOOKING FOR THE [ BLEEP ]. [ LAUGHTER ]
I JUST WANT IT." "WHERE IS IT IT'S NOT BACK THERE.
>> Jimmy: IT'S NOT THERE, NO BUT I -- [ LAUGHTER ]
LET'S TALK ABOUT ONE OF THE OTHER PODCASTS, WHICH IS CALLED "NEWCOMERS."
>> YES >> "NEWCOMERS. GENIUS IDEA.
YOU TALK ABOUT THINGS THAT EVERYONE SEEMS TO KNOW ABOUT, EXCEPT FOR YOU
>> YEAH. SO IT'S ME AND LAUREN LAPKUS, SHE'S SO FUNNY
>> Jimmy: SHE IS SO GREAT. >> SHE'S -- I LOVE HER SO MUCH BUT WE -
>> Jimmy: BUT THE WRONG MISSY, BY THE WAY >> YEAH, IT'S SO FUNNY
SHE FALLS OFF A CLIFF IN ONE SCENE. I WAS LIKE, "OH, MY GOD, I'M
DYING. ANYWAY - >> Jimmy: SHE'S BRILLIANT IN
IT ANYWAY - >> BUT WE WATCHED "LORD OF THE
RINGS" AND PEOPLE LIKE IT. [ LAUGHTER ] >> Jimmy: WAIT A MINUTE HERE
IT'S A VERY POPULAR FILM [ LAUGHTER ] A LOT OF PEOPLE LIKE IT.
THEY LOVE IT >> BUT WHY -- IT'S JUST A MAGICAL HIKE
[ LAUGHTER ] THEY'RE JUST GOING TO THE SPRING AND THEN THERE'S GOLLUM
HE'S GOT THINNING HAIR AND HE'S LIKE, "MY RING!" I'M LIKE, "YOU'RE JUST A WOMAN,
LIKE, WANTING A MAN TO PROPOSE TO YOU." >> Jimmy: YEAH, THAT'S REALLY,
THAT'S - [ LAUGHTER ] >> HE'S LIKE, "WHERE'S MY
RING?" LIKE, I'M GOLLUM OH, MY GOD
>> Jimmy: NO, YOU'RE NOT GOLLUM >> I'M GOLLUM.
>> Jimmy: YOU ARE NOT GOLLUM NO, NO, NO WHAT OTHER BIG FRANCHISES IS
EVERYONE INTO THAT YOU ARE NOT SURE ABOUT >> OH, SO, LIKE, MARVEL.
I'M NOT A MARVEL HEAD. >> Jimmy: HAVE YOU SEEN ANY OF THEM
>> WELL, I'VE SEEN "BLACK PANTHER" BECAUSE I'M BLACK, AND --
[ LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE >> Jimmy: UH-HUH, YEP. >> WE HAD TO
>> Jimmy: YOU HAD TO >> WE HAD TO, OTHERWISE WE'D LOSE OUR CARD.
>> Jimmy: I UNDERSTAND [ LAUGHTER ] >> OH, THEY'RE MY FRIENDS OVER
THERE. HELLO. >> Jimmy: YEAH
[ LAUGHTER ] >> THEY KNOW THEY KNOW.
Y'ALL KNOW, OVER THERE BUT I RECENTLY SAW THE NEW "SPIDER-MAN.
I HAD NOT SEEN ANY OF THEM I HAD SO MANY QUESTIONS. AND ONE OF THEM -- I WAS LIKE,
"JAMIE FOXX IS IN 'SPIDER-MAN'?" AND THEN MY FRIEND WAS LIKE,
"OH YEAH, THIS IS A PICTURE FROM THE ORIGINAL ONE THAT HE WAS IN."
>> Jimmy: YEAH >> YEAH, AND I WAS LIKE -- >> Jimmy: PULL OUT THIS.
>> WHAT PLOT POINT BROUGHT THIS MAN TO LOOK LIKE THAT? [ LAUGHTER ]
WHAT -- WHAT DOES SPIDER-MAN DO TO THIS -- IS THIS -- WHAT HAPPENED
IS IT -- WHAT? HOW? WHY?
I DON'T GET IT SOMEONE DID HIS HAIR AND SAID, "GO TO SET."
LIKE WHAT IS THAT? [ LAUGHTER ] >> Jimmy: YEAH
>> I STILL HAVEN'T GOTTEN ANY ANSWERS. >> Jimmy: YEAH, NO -
>> IT'S WILD TO LOOK AT. >> Jimmy: BUT DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA LIKE, MAYBE HE MIGHT END
UP BEING A VILLAIN OR COMING TOGETHER TO -- >> WELL, I KNOW HE'S A VILLAIN,
I THINK. >> Jimmy: OKAY >> BUT HE, LIKE, DIDN'T SEEM
THAT MEAN, SO I WAS LIKE WHO'S THE REAL - I DON'T -- THERE WERE SO MANY
THINGS GOING ON. >> Jimmy: YEAH >> AND THEN THERE WAS -- WELL,
I DON'T WANT TO RUIN IT. DID EVERYONE HERE SEE "SPIDER-MAN"
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE >> Jimmy: BUT JUST -- BUT DON'T -- YOU CAN'T SPOIL
ANYTHING >> OKAY, WELL THERE WAS THINGS THAT HAPPENED THAT I WAS LIKE,
"WHAT? >> Jimmy: BE GENERIC >> BE GENERIC?
I DON'T KNOW WHAT GENERIC MEANS. [ LAUGHTER ]
I'M KIDDING. >> Jimmy: I KNOW >> I'M JUST BOUJEE
[ LAUGHTER ] >> Jimmy: I MEAN BASICALLY -- WHAT DID YOU THINK HAPPENED IN
THE FILM >> I KNOW "SPIDER-MAN" WAS, LIKE, MAD ABOUT SOMETHING, AND
THEN THERE'S A BOX, AND THEN THERE'S THIS MAN WHO LIVES IN SNOW
AND I WAS LIKE, "WHO ARE YOU WHY IS THERE SNOW IN YOUR HOUSE?
YOU LOOK RICH. GET A -- CAN SOMEONE JUST SHOVEL THAT [ BLEEP ] OUT?
LIKE - [ LAUGHTER ] IT WAS SO CONFUSING.
[ APPLAUSE ] >> Jimmy: YEAH, YEAH THAT WAS INTERESTING
>> I WAS LIKE, "WHAT A CHOICE. LIKE, I JUST -- I DON'T KNOW >> Jimmy: WHAT A CHOICE.
>> THEN THERE'S THE AVENGERS IT'S LIKE, "WHAT THEY ALL GET TOGETHER, HAVE
A SLUMBER PARTY? LIKE, WHAT IS THE AVENGERS, AND WHY DO THEY ALL HAVE TO GET
TOGETHER THEY ALL HAVE THEIR INDIVIDUAL MOVIES."
I DON'T UNDERSTAND MARVEL. [ LAUGHTER ] >> Jimmy: YOU'VE BEEN DOING
COMEDY FOR A LONG TIME [ LAUGHTER ] YOU'RE PRETTY GOOD AT IT
BUT I JUST HEARD THAT YOU AUDITIONED FOR "SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE" AT ONE POINT
>> I DID >> Jimmy: I DON'T REMEMBER THAT
WHAT DID YOU DO FOR YOUR AUDITION DO YOU REMEMBER?
>> THIS WAS YEARS AND YEARS AND YEARS AGO. I DO AN OPRAH IMPRESSION OR DID
AN OPRAH IMPRESSION. AND I I OUT WHAT OPRAH WOULD BE TALKING G
ABOUT. AND I FOUND OUT THERE'S OVER, LIKE, 100 DIFFERENT TYPES OF
LEMURS, SO IT'S JUST -- THE IMPRESSION IS JUST ME SCREAMING LEMUR NAMES IN OPRAH'S VOICE
[ LAUGHTER ] NO WONDER THEY DIDN'T HIRE ME. [ LAUGHTER ]
>> Jimmy: I LIKE THAT. >> THEY'RE LIKE, "WHAT IS THIS?"
>> Jimmy: "A LEMUR!" >> "A RED LEMUR! [ LAUGHTER ]
>> Jimmy: I WOULD WATCH THE OPRAH LEMUR SHOW >> SO THEN I DID A JAMAICAN
NANNY BIT, AND IT'S BASED ON THIS REAL THING THAT HAPPENED TO ME.
I, LIKE, WAS A NANNY, WENT TO THE PARK, AND I WAS LIKE - AND THIS LADY LOOKED AT ME AND
SHE SAID, "WHAT ARE YOU AIMING AT?" BECAUSE SHE KNEW I WAS FAKING
THE ACCENT [ LAUGHTER ] AND I WAS LIKE, "I DON'T KNOW,
FRIENDSHIP?" [ LAUGHTER ] >> Jimmy: "YOU'RE NOT SUPPOSED
TO TALK BACK TO ME, I'M JUST --" >> I WAS, LIKE, JUST GOING TO
TALK TO HER. >> Jimmy: YEAH >> BUT THEN SHE WAS LIKE,
"YOU'RE A LIAR." AND I WAS LIKE, "OH, OKAY. WE GO TO A DIFFERENT PARK," AND
I SCOOPED HIM UP, AND I WAS LIKE, "WE'VE GOT TO GO." [ LAUGHTER ]
>> Jimmy: "WE'VE GOT TO GET OUT OF HERE. IS THERE ANYTHING ELSE YOU WANT
TO TRY THAT YOU'RE DOING ALL OF THIS STUFF >> ANYTHING ELSE I WANT TO TRY
>> Jimmy: I MEAN, NOT HERE ON OUR SHOW, BUT I MEAN IN LIFE, I MEAN, YOU'RE DOING -
>> I WAS LIKE, "WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO? >> Jimmy: "BRING OUT THE RED
LEMUR! [ LAUGHTER ] BUT YOU'VE DONE PODCASTS,
SHOWS -- I MEAN HOW ABOUT A -- >> PUT ME IN A MOVIE PUT ME IN "BLACK PANTHER 2."
"I'M FROM WAKANDA. THAT WAS A BAD ACCENT. >> Jimmy: NO, THAT WAS GOOD.
IT'S NOT THAT I WANT YOU TO DO ANYTHING ELSE. YOU'RE GREAT ON "GRAND CREW,"
BY THE WAY >> THANK YOU >> Jimmy: AND IT'S A HIT SHOW
FOR NBC, WHICH WE LOVE BUT CAN YOU SET UP WHAT "GRAND CREW" IS ABOUT
>> SURE. SO IT'S A BUNCH OF FRIENDS WHO HANG OUT IN A WINE BAR AND
THEY'RE NAVIGATING THEIR LATE 20s, EARLY 30s. I DON'T KNOW IF WE HAVE AGES,
BUT, LIKE, WE'RE HAVING A GOOD TIME WE DRINK WINE.
WINE'S FUN GETS YOU DRUNK >> Jimmy: THAT'S ALL THEY TALK
ABOUT, THAT'S WHAT I LOVE. THIS WAS -- WHEN THEY DEVELOPED THIS, THEY HAD YOU IN MIND FOR
THEIR CHARACTER. >> YEAH, MY FRIEND PHIL AUGUSTA JACKSON, I HAVE
KNOWN HIM FOR, LIKE, OVER A DECADE WE PERFORMED HERE IN NEW YORK
AT THE UPRIGHT CITIZENS BRIGADE THEATRE, AND HE WAS DEVELOPING THE SHOW
AND HE WAS LIKE, "I HAVE A PART CALLED 'NICKY,' IT'S BASED ON YOU.
WOULD YOU LIKE TO DO IT? MY GOVERNMENT NAME'S NICOLE, AND I WAS LIKE, "YEAH, IT'S
CLOSE. LET'S DO THIS. AND IT GOT PICKED UP
AND I WAS, LIKE, YOU KNOW, FORTUNATE ENOUGH TO BE ABLE TO PLAY THE PART.
>> Jimmy: AND DID YOU KNOW THE CAST BEFORE YOU STARTED WORKING WITH THEM?
>> YEAH, ECHO KELLUM AND I, WHO PLAYS MY BROTHER, WE DID SKETCH TOGETHER
IT USED TO BE IN L.A CARL TART, WE DO IMPROV TOGETHER IN L.A.
AARON JENNINGS, WE HAVE WORKED TOGETHER GRASIE MERCEDES AND
JUSTIN CUNNINGHAM, WE HADN'T WORKED TOGETHER, BUT THEY, LIKE, FIT IN SO WONDERFULLY.
HONESTLY, LIKE, WE HAVE SO MUCH [ BLEEP ] FUN. LIKE IT'S SO FUN
IT'S NOT A REAL JOB. [ LAUGHTER ] >> Jimmy: IT'S A GOOD -- IT'S
A GOOD VIBE. >> OH, I LOVE IT >> Jimmy: IT'S NOT A REAL JOB.
>> LIKE WE'RE ALWAYS JUST LAUGHING IT DOESN'T FEEL LIKE A REAL
JOB. >> Jimmy: THAT'S WHAT WE WANT TO WATCH
THAT'S WHY PEOPLE LOVE IT, BECAUSE YOU WANT TO WATCH AND LAUGH.
I WANT TO SHOW EVERYONE A CLIP HERE IS NICOLE BYER IN "GRAND CREW."
TAKE A LOOK AT THIS.
* >> MICKEY, WHY ARE YOU IN MY
HOME, AND WHY ARE YOU HERE SO EARLY IN THE MO -- NO, NO, NO, YOU DIDN'T
STANDING STILL DOESN'T MAKE YOU INVISIBLE. DID YOU SLEEP WITH MY BROTHER?
AND DON'T YOU LIE TO ME. >> OH, YES, LIKE THREE TIMES LAST NIGHT
>> DIDN'T NEED TO KNOW HOW MANY ROUNDS YOU WENT. JUST WANTED A YES OR NO.
>> YOU SAID DON'T LIE TO YOU ALSO TWO MORE TIMES THIS MORNING.
[ LAUGHTER ] >> Jimmy: OH JUST BECAUSE YOU'RE STANDING
STILL DOESN'T MEAN - NICOLE BYER! "GRAND CREW" AIRS TUESDAY
NIGHTS AT 8:30 ON NBC. THAT'S AWESOME COME BACK, PLEASE.
>> THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR HAVING ME >> Jimmy: WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK
WITH A PERFORMANCE FROM IMAGINE DRAGONS. STICK AROUND
COME ON BACK [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE *
>> Jimmy: PERFORMING THEIR HIT "ENEMY" FROM THE NETFLIX ANIMATED SERIES "ARCANE," HERE
ARE IMAGINE DRAGONS.
* >> LOOK OUT FOR YOURSELF * I
WAKE UP TO THE SOUND OF THE SILENCE THAT ALLOWS *
* FOR MY MIND TO RUN AROUND WITH MY EAR UP TO THE GROUND *
* I'M SEARCHING TO BEHOLD THE STORIES THAT ARE TOLD * * WHEN MY BAC
WAS TO THE WORLD * * THERE WAS SMILING WHEN I TURNED *
* TELL YOU YOU'RE THE GREATEST * * BUT ONCE YOU TURN
THEY HATE US * * OH, THE MISER EVERYBODY WANTS TO B
MY ENEMY * * SPARE THE SYMPATH EVERYBODY WANTS TO B
MY ENEMY * * LOOK OUT FOR YOURSELF MY ENEMY *
* LOOK OUT FOR YOURSELF BUT I'M READY * *
* YOUR WORDS UP ON THE WALL AS YOU'RE PRAYIN FOR MY FALL *
* AND THE LAUGHTE IN THE HALLS * * AND THE NAMES
THAT I'VE BEEN CALLED * * I STACK IT IN MY MIND I'M WAITIN
FOR THE TIME * * WHEN I SHOW YOU WHAT IT'S LIKE *
* TO BE WORDS SPIT IN A MIC * * TELL YOU YOU'RE
THE GREATEST * * BUT ONCE YOU TURN THEY HATE US *
* OH, THE MISER EVERYBODY WANTS TO B MY ENEMY *
* SPARE THE SYMPATH EVERYBODY WANTS TO B MY ENEMY *
* LOOK OUT FOR YOURSELF MY ENEMY LOOK OUT FOR YOURSELF *
* THEY SAY PRAY IT WA I SWEAR, I'LL NEVER * * BE A SAIN
NO WAY * * I TURN, IN THE CORNER IS THE PLACE I STAY *
* I SHAKE, AND I THIN ABOUT THE POWERS AT PLAY THE POWERS AT PLAY *
* KIDS IN THE DAR DOOMED FROM THE START * * AND THE CHILD
IN THE BASEMEN FACE IN THE PAVEMENT * * OH, WHAT A STATEMEN
LOVE IS EMBRACIN' * * LOVE IS A CONSTAN LOVE IS THE BASIS *
* HE CANNOT B SHE CANNOT BE THEY CANNOT BE CHANGED *
* BUT KEEP ON PRAYIN' GOOD BYE * * OH, THE MISER
EVERYBODY WANTS TO B MY ENEMY * * SPARE THE SYMPATH
CAUSE EVERYBODY WANTS TO B MY ENEMY * * OH, THE MISER
EVERYBODY WANTS TO B MY ENEMY * * SPARE THE SYMPATH
CAUSE EVERYBODY WANTS TO B MY ENEMY * * PRAY IT AWA
I SWEAR * * I'LL NEVER BE A SAINT NO WAY
MY ENEMY * * PRAY IT AWA I SWEA
I'LL NEVER BE A SAINT * * THEY SA PRAY IT AWAY
I SWEAR * * I'LL NEVER BE A SAINT NO WAY *
* THEY SA PRAY IT AWAY I SWEAR *
* I'LL NEVER BE A SAINT NO WAY LOOK OUT FOR YOURSELF *
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE >> Jimmy: IMAGINE DRAGONS! CATCH THEM ON TOUR NOW
MY THANKS TO JAMIE DORNAN, NICOLE BYER. IMAGINE DRAGONS ONCE AGAIN
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE AND THE ROOTS RIGHT THERE FROM PHILADELPHIA, PENNSYLVANIA
THANK YOU FOR WATCHING STAY TUNED FOR "LATE NIGHT WITH SETH MEYERS.
GOOD NIGHT, EVERYBODY. [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE *
* *