1 00:00:09,376 --> 00:00:11,845 >> Steve: FROM STUDIO 6B IN ROCKEFELLER CENTER IN THE HEART 2 00:00:11,845 --> 00:00:19,052 OF NEW YORK CITY, IT'S "THE TONIGHT SHOW STARRING JIMMY FALLON." 3 00:00:19,052 --> 00:00:23,089 TONIGHT, JOIN JIMMY AND HIS GUESTS - SAVANNAH GUTHRIE AND HODA KOTB 4 00:00:23,089 --> 00:00:28,661 COLIN QUINN, MUSICAL GUEST, MADISON CUNNINGHAM 5 00:00:28,661 --> 00:00:33,266 AND FEATURING THE LEGENDARY ROOTS CREW >> Questlove: 1771 6 00:00:33,266 --> 00:00:39,039 >> Questlove: 1771 >> Steve: AND NOW, HERE HE IS, JIMMY FALLON 7 00:00:48,815 --> 00:00:51,418 * 8 00:00:51,418 --> 00:01:00,260 * [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE >> Jimmy: HELLO, EVERYONE! 9 00:01:00,260 --> 00:01:05,932 WELCOME! [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE WELCOME TO "THE TONIGHT SHOW." 10 00:01:05,932 --> 00:01:07,801 GUYS, BEFORE WE GET STARTED, DOES ANYONE HERE WANT TO BE SPEAKER OF THE HOUSE 11 00:01:07,801 --> 00:01:15,775 [ LAUGHTER AND CHEERS YEP, AS OF TONIGHT'S TAPING, IT'S BEEN THREE DAYS AND NINE 12 00:01:15,775 --> 00:01:19,946 VOTES, AND WE STILL DON'T HAVE A SPEAKER OF THE HOUSE [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] 13 00:01:19,946 --> 00:01:22,082 BEFORE TODAY'S VOTE, C-SPAN WAS LIKE, "WE SWEAR THIS IS NOT A RERUN. 14 00:01:22,082 --> 00:01:25,285 [ LAUGHTER ] RIGHT NOW, KEVIN McCARTHY IS SO EMBARRASSED, HE WENT UP TO 15 00:01:25,285 --> 00:01:30,223 GEORGE SANTOS AND SAID, "HELP ME CREATE A NEW IDENTITY." [ LAUGHTER ] 16 00:01:30,223 --> 00:01:34,594 McCARTHY HAS LOST NINE TIMES IT IS BRUTAL I MEAN, THERE'S A REASON WHY 17 00:01:34,594 --> 00:01:36,763 YOU ONLY GET THREE STRIKES IN BASEBALL I MEAN, IT'S JUST HARD TO 18 00:01:36,763 --> 00:01:38,965 WATCH. NINE THAT'S A LOT 19 00:01:38,965 --> 00:01:41,468 THAT'S SOMEWHERE BETWEEN COVID VARIANTS AND "YELLOWSTONE" SPINOFFS 20 00:01:41,468 --> 00:01:44,204 NINE NINE [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] 21 00:01:44,204 --> 00:01:47,240 AND GET THIS - I READ THAT SOME DEMOCRATS AND REPUBLICANS ARE CONSIDERING 22 00:01:47,240 --> 00:01:52,612 A DEAL FOR A SPEAKER BOTH PARTIES CAN GET BEHIND SO CONGRATULATIONS TO OUR NEW 23 00:01:52,612 --> 00:01:54,247 SPEAKER OF THE HOUSE, "TOP GUN: MAVERICK." [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE 24 00:01:54,247 --> 00:02:03,456 THAT'S A GOOD MOVIE. MEANWHILE, McCARTHY IS NOW IN THE NEGOTIATION PHASE, WHERE 25 00:02:03,456 --> 00:02:05,058 HE'S MAKING A BUNCH OF CONCESSIONS WITH THE REPUBLICANS WHO ARE AGAINST 26 00:02:05,058 --> 00:02:09,229 HIM. AND ONE OF THOSE CONCESSIONS IS A CHANGE TO THE RULES THAT 27 00:02:09,229 --> 00:02:15,368 WOULD MAKE IT EASIER TO REMOVE HIM. [ LAUGHTER ] 28 00:02:15,368 --> 00:02:17,337 YOU KNOW IT'S BAD WHEN THE ONLY WAY YOU CAN GET HIRED IS IF YOU PROMISE TO GET FIRED, YOU KNOW 29 00:02:17,337 --> 00:02:20,073 WHAT I'M SAYING? [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] COURSE, WITH EVERYTHING GOING 30 00:02:20,073 --> 00:02:24,310 ON IN WASHINGTON, IT'S BEEN A BUSY WEEK FOR NEWS ANCHORS, AND I THINK THEY NEED A BREAK. 31 00:02:24,310 --> 00:02:28,782 I MEAN, CHECK OUT THIS CLIP OF ANDREA MITCHELL ON MSNBC EARLIER TODAY. 32 00:02:30,950 --> 00:02:34,688 BIG CONCESSIONS TO THE NEVER-KEVINS, AT THE RISK OF ALIENATING SOME OF HIS ORIGINAL 33 00:02:34,688 --> 00:02:37,557 SUPPORTERS IN THE REPUBLICAN CAUCUS - [ GAGS ] 34 00:02:37,557 --> 00:02:42,562 EXCUSE ME. [ LAUGHTER ] >> Steve: HEY! 35 00:02:42,562 --> 00:02:49,135 OI WOW. [ RIM SHOT ] 36 00:02:49,135 --> 00:02:53,106 [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] >> Jimmy: AND THEN, FOR THE FIRST TIME IN TV HISTORY, 37 00:02:53,106 --> 00:02:57,777 A NEWS ANCHOR COUGHED UP A HAIR BALL [ LAUGHTER ] 38 00:02:57,777 --> 00:03:00,947 THAT'S THE SOUND YOU MAKE WHEN THE DOCTORS CHECKS IF YOU HAVE STREP THROAT, YOU KNOW WHAT I'M 39 00:03:00,947 --> 00:03:02,515 SAYING [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] THAT'S THE SOUND YOUR KETCHUP 40 00:03:02,515 --> 00:03:05,051 BOTTLE MAKES WHEN YOU TRY TO SQUEEZE OUT THE LAST DROP. [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] 41 00:03:05,051 --> 00:03:06,052 [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] THE CLOSED CAPTIONING JUST SAID - 42 00:03:06,786 --> 00:03:12,859 [ LAUGHTER ] 43 00:03:12,859 --> 00:03:16,796 YEP, CONGRESS SPENT A THIRD DAY VOTING FOR A NEW SPEAKER OF THE HOUSE. 44 00:03:16,796 --> 00:03:18,565 AND AFTER SO MANY ROUNDS, I FEEL BAD FOR THE PEOPLE WHO HAVE TO KEEP READING ALL THE 45 00:03:18,565 --> 00:03:22,802 NAMES OF THE REPRESENTATIVES TO GET THEIR VOTE >> Steve: YOU KNOW WHAT? 46 00:03:22,802 --> 00:03:25,105 DON'T FEEL BAD IT'S EASY. >> Jimmy: I'M JUST SAYING, IT'S 47 00:03:25,105 --> 00:03:27,507 TEDIOUS. AND SOME OF THE NAMES ARE HARD TO PRONOUNCE 48 00:03:27,507 --> 00:03:28,908 >> Steve: NOT WHEN YOU'RE A PROFESSIONAL ANNOUNCER LIKE ME 49 00:03:28,908 --> 00:03:33,413 GO AHEAD, TEST ME. >> Jimmy: OKAY, I GUESS I CAN. I'LL TEST REAL QUICK 50 00:03:33,413 --> 00:03:37,784 WHO'S THIS >> Steve: OKAY, EASY JERRY CURL 51 00:03:37,784 --> 00:03:44,124 >> Jimmy: ALL RIGHT. [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] OKAY, WHO'S -- WHO'S THIS? 52 00:03:44,124 --> 00:03:47,093 >> Steve: COME ON. BARRY MANILOW. COME ON. 53 00:03:47,093 --> 00:03:50,363 [ LAUGHTER ] GIVE ME SOME HARDER ONES RAPID FIRE ME. 54 00:03:50,363 --> 00:03:52,766 >> Jimmy: OKAY HERE WE GO WHO'S THIS 55 00:03:52,766 --> 00:03:55,101 >> Steve: OKAY DAVID SCHWIMMER. [ LAUGHTER ] 56 00:03:55,101 --> 00:03:57,904 RIHANNA. LADY MACBETH [ LAUGHTER ] 57 00:03:57,904 --> 00:04:02,575 BAD SALMON CHIPS AHOY [ LAUGHTER ] 58 00:04:02,575 --> 00:04:08,915 FRANK STALLONE AH, AH, AH-CHOO. [ LAUGHTER ] 59 00:04:08,915 --> 00:04:13,086 OH, IT'S SCOTT DELIVERY, IT'S DiGIORNO [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] 60 00:04:13,086 --> 00:04:18,658 AH NA-NA-NA-NA, NA-NA-NA, NA-NA-NA, NA-NA-NA [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE 61 00:04:18,658 --> 00:04:21,061 * NA-NA-NA-NA-NAH. LYRICAL GANGSTER 62 00:04:21,061 --> 00:04:26,099 [ APPLAUSE ] NICE BLUNT ROTATION. >> Jimmy: OKAY 63 00:04:26,099 --> 00:04:29,703 [ LAUGHTER ] >> Steve: OH, YANK JOHNSON MENAGE A TROIS IN GREECE 64 00:04:29,703 --> 00:04:35,508 [ LAUGHTER ] OH, VICIOUS SHARTS [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] 65 00:04:35,508 --> 00:04:40,747 AND LIAR [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE >> Jimmy: OKAY, THAT'S - 66 00:04:40,747 --> 00:04:43,083 THANK YOU VERY - STEVE HIGGINS, A PROFESSIONAL. STEVE HIGGINS, EVERYONE. 67 00:04:43,083 --> 00:04:46,586 * [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE >> Jimmy: EVERYONE IS WEIGHING 68 00:04:46,586 --> 00:04:49,689 IN ON THIS TODAY, ELON MUSK TWEETED, "KEVIN McCARTHY SHOULD BE 69 00:04:49,689 --> 00:04:53,960 SPEAKER. IT MAKES SENSE BECAUSE KEVIN McCARTHY IS A LOT LIKE A 70 00:04:53,960 --> 00:04:57,197 A TESLA -- HE WAS ON THE ROAD TO HIS DESTINATION AND THEN SUDDENLY 71 00:04:57,197 --> 00:05:01,401 VEERED OFF COURSE. [ AUDIENCE OHS ] MEANWHILE, PRESIDENT BIDEN IS 72 00:05:01,401 --> 00:05:03,203 STAYING OUT OF THE SPEAKER DRAMA, CALLING IT EMBARRASSING, BUT SAYING, QUOTE, "THAT'S NOT 73 00:05:03,203 --> 00:05:08,408 MY PROBLEM." [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] THEN HE ADDED, "BUT IF IT WERE 74 00:05:08,408 --> 00:05:10,043 MY PROBLEM, I DEFINITELY WOULDN'T BE LAUGHING AT KEVIN McCARTHY RIGHT NOW LIKE I 75 00:05:10,043 --> 00:05:12,879 AM AND I WOULDN'T BE CHECKING THE NEWS EVERY FIVE MINUTES TO SEE 76 00:05:12,879 --> 00:05:17,350 IF HE LOST ANOTHER VOTE WHILE RUBBING MY HANDS LIKE IT'S DINNER TIME. 77 00:05:17,350 --> 00:05:25,225 FORTUNATELY, I DON'T HAVE TO GIVE MY OPINION. [ LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE 78 00:05:25,225 --> 00:05:27,427 BIDEN THEN ADDED, "BUT IF I DID HAVE TO GIVE MY OPINION -- [ LAUGHTER ] 79 00:05:27,427 --> 00:05:30,163 "-- I'D PROBABLY SAY THIS IS THE MOST FUN I'VE HAD IN MY ENTIRE PRESIDENCY. 80 00:05:30,163 --> 00:05:34,300 EVERY MORNING FEELS LIKE CHRISTMAS AND MY BIRTHDAY COMBINED 81 00:05:34,300 --> 00:05:36,503 THAT SAID, THIS IS A MATTER REGARDING A DIFFERENT BRANCH OF GOVERNMENT AND I DON'T HAVE TO 82 00:05:36,503 --> 00:05:44,344 GET INVOLVED." [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE THEN HE ADDED, "BUT IF I DID 83 00:05:44,344 --> 00:05:47,313 HAVE TO GET INVOLVED --" [ LAUGHTER ] "-- I'D PROBABLY THROW A PARADE 84 00:05:47,313 --> 00:05:49,816 OF SORTS, MAYBE USING 15,000 DRONES TO FORM AN IMAGE OF KEVIN McCARTHY'S FACE IN THE 85 00:05:49,816 --> 00:05:51,551 SKY AND THEN IT'D MORPH INTO THE CRYING JORDAN MEME, WHILE PLAYING 'EVERYBODY HURTS' AT 86 00:05:51,551 --> 00:05:59,893 FULL VOLUME. [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE AT WHICH HE -- AT WHICH POINT 87 00:05:59,893 --> 00:06:05,899 BIDEN JUST POSTED THE KERMIT DRINKING TEA MEME. THERE YOU GO 88 00:06:05,899 --> 00:06:08,735 THAT'S INTERESTING [ APPLAUSE ] EVERYBODY'S TALKING ABOUT 89 00:06:08,735 --> 00:06:11,137 THIS - IN HIS FORTHCOMING BOOK, PRINCE HARRY CLAIMS THAT 90 00:06:11,137 --> 00:06:13,773 PRINCE WILLIAM ONCE KNOCKED HIM TO THE FLOOR DURING AN ARGUMENT ABOUT MEGHAN 91 00:06:13,773 --> 00:06:18,044 [ AUDIENCE OOHS APPARENTLY THE FIGHT HAPPENED AT THE BUCKINGHAM WAFFLE 92 00:06:18,044 --> 00:06:21,314 PALACE [ LAUGHTER ] IT'S FUN WHEN ROYALS FIGHT, 93 00:06:21,314 --> 00:06:29,956 'CAUSE THEY KEEP THEIR PINKIES OUT. [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] 94 00:06:29,956 --> 00:06:32,058 HARRY WAS SHOCKED, BECAUSE USUALLY WHEN THEY FIGHT, THEY JUST STAND BACK AND TELL THEIR 95 00:06:32,058 --> 00:06:34,627 BUTLERS WHAT TO DO "BUT NOW -- NOW, PERHAPS A KNEE TO THE GROIN." 96 00:06:34,627 --> 00:06:40,967 [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] "CHOKE HIM OUT, JEEVES." HARRY ALSO WRITES IN HIS NEW 97 00:06:40,967 --> 00:06:44,971 BOOK, THAT BEFORE HE MARRIED MEGHAN, WILLIAM AND KATE WERE RELIGIOUS VIEWERS OF HER SHOW 98 00:06:44,971 --> 00:06:48,775 "SUITS." I FEEL LIKE I BELIEVED EVERYTHING PRINCE HARRY SAID 99 00:06:48,775 --> 00:06:53,780 UNTIL JUST NOW [ LAUGHTER ] I DON'T THINK EVEN THE STARS OF 100 00:06:53,780 --> 00:06:57,584 "SUITS" WERE RELIGIOUS VIEWERS OF "SUITS. [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] 101 00:06:57,584 --> 00:07:01,087 WELL, SOME MOVIE NEWS, "AVATAR: THE WAY OF WATER" HAS OFFICIALLY PASSED "TOP GUN: 102 00:07:01,087 --> 00:07:03,923 MAVERICK" TO BECOME THE NUMBER ONE MOVIE OF 2022. [ SCATTERED CHEERS ] 103 00:07:03,923 --> 00:07:07,861 IT IS A HUGE, HUGE HIT IT MADE US WONDER, WHAT WOULD OTHER CLASSIC MOVIES LOOK LIKE 104 00:07:07,861 --> 00:07:10,363 OTHER CLASSIC MOVIES LOOK LIKE IF THEY TOOK PLACE UNDERWATER? CHECK THIS OUT 105 00:07:12,399 --> 00:07:17,070 [ LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE 106 00:07:17,070 --> 00:07:22,609 * >> Jimmy: THAT'S IT. PRETTY GOOD. 107 00:07:22,609 --> 00:07:25,211 I'D WATCH THAT WELL, LISTEN TO THIS - I HEARD THAT PEOPLE ON TIKTOK 108 00:07:25,211 --> 00:07:29,516 ARE CLAIMING THAT A GREAT WAY TO BEAT THE FLU IS BY SLEEPING WITH POTATO SLICES IN YOUR 109 00:07:29,516 --> 00:07:34,054 SOCKS. THERE'S A LOT OF QUESTIONABLE MEDICAL ADVICE ONLINE, AND 110 00:07:34,054 --> 00:07:39,459 DEPENDING ON WHERE YOU LOOK, YOU GET PRETTY DIFFERENT ANSWERS. 111 00:07:39,459 --> 00:07:43,496 FOR INSTANCE, FOR THE FLU, TIKTOK SAYS "SLEEP WITH POTATO SLICES YOUR SOCKS. 112 00:07:43,496 --> 00:07:45,465 FACEBOOK SAYS, "ASK BILL GATES -- HE OWNS YOUR DNA, ROBOT. 113 00:07:45,465 --> 00:07:48,535 [ LAUGHTER ] WEBMD SAYS, "GET YOUR AFFAIRS IN ORDER, YOU'RE GONNA DIE." 114 00:07:48,535 --> 00:07:56,076 [ LAUGHTER ] NEXT UP, FOR A COLD, TIKTOK SAYS, "MAKE NYQUIL CHICKEN 115 00:07:56,076 --> 00:07:59,079 SOUP." [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] TWITTER SAYS, "BRING IN 116 00:07:59,079 --> 00:08:01,781 ELON MUSK TO FIRE HALF YOUR GERMS. WEBMD SAYS, "GET YOUR AFFAIRS 117 00:08:01,781 --> 00:08:08,855 IN ORDER, YOU'RE GONNA DIE." [ LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE AND FINALLY, FOR COVID, TIKTOK 118 00:08:08,855 --> 00:08:13,693 SAYS, "SWAB YOUR NOSE WITH A A MINI MICROPHONE. TRUTH SOCIAL SAYS, "TAKE A SHOT 119 00:08:13,693 --> 00:08:17,030 OF BLEACH. AND WEBMD SAYS, "GET YOUR AFFAIRS IN ORDER, YOU'RE GONNA 120 00:08:17,030 --> 00:08:20,300 DIE. [ LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE I THINK JUST CALL A REAL 121 00:08:20,300 --> 00:08:25,472 DOCTOR GUYS, I READ ABOUT A NEW COVID VARIANT THAT HAS SOME PEOPLE 122 00:08:25,472 --> 00:08:32,579 WORRIED. IT'S CALLED XBB.1.5. I GUESS THEY COULDN'T THINK OF 123 00:08:32,579 --> 00:08:35,048 A CATCHIER NAME. AND IT ACTUALLY INSPIRED ME TO WRITE A TINY SONG. 124 00:08:35,048 --> 00:08:36,950 AND IT ACTUALLY INSPIRED ME TO WRITE A TINY SONG. [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE 125 00:08:41,588 --> 00:08:44,958 * THERE WAS ALPHA THEN DELT THEN OMICRON NEX 126 00:08:44,958 --> 00:08:51,598 BUT THIS LATEST VARIAN MIGHT BE THE BEST * * IT'S XBB.1. 127 00:08:51,598 --> 00:08:56,870 ANOTHER FRIEND OF COVID-19 HAS ARRIVED * * IT'S A NEW STRAIN 128 00:08:56,870 --> 00:09:02,542 BUT IT ISN'T THE SAM SOUNDS MORE LIKE ELON MUSK'S KID'S NAME * 129 00:09:02,542 --> 00:09:09,849 * IT'S XBB.1. NOT UB40 WHO SINGS RED RED WINE * 130 00:09:09,849 --> 00:09:15,121 * PUT ON YOUR MAS WHEN YOU'RE INSIDE A FACILIT IT COULD BE A ROBO 131 00:09:15,121 --> 00:09:23,296 FROM A STAR WARS TRILOGY * * IT'S XBB.1. NOT OMG OR MP3 OR TCBY 132 00:09:23,296 --> 00:09:29,035 OR AN EYE CHAR MADE BY A REALLY HIGH GUY * * SOUNDS LIKE THE PASSWOR 133 00:09:29,035 --> 00:09:38,611 OF YOUR PARENTS' WIF IT'S XBB.1.5 XBB.1.5 * 134 00:09:38,611 --> 00:09:54,928 [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE >> Jimmy: THAT'S THE MOST APPLAUSE I'VE GOTTEN IN FIVE 135 00:09:54,928 --> 00:09:59,499 YEARS. >> Steve: WOW. >> Jimmy: IT'S UNBELIEVABLE. 136 00:09:59,499 --> 00:10:01,468 SWITCHING GEARS, A BIG CONSUMER ELECTRONICS SHOW JUST KICKED OFF IN LAS VEGAS, AND THERE ARE 137 00:10:01,468 --> 00:10:03,003 SO MANY NEW PRODUCTS ON DISPLAY, INCLUDING A A SELF-DRIVING STROLLER THAT'S 138 00:10:03,003 --> 00:10:12,178 POWERED BY ARTIFICIAL INTELLIGENCE [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] 139 00:10:12,178 --> 00:10:15,015 THE ONLY QUESTION IS, WILL IT BE A BILLION DOLLAR LAWSUIT OR A TRILLION DOLLAR LAWSUIT? 140 00:10:15,015 --> 00:10:18,418 [ LAUGHTER ] YEAH, THE COMMERCIAL SAYS, "ORDER ONE NOW BEFORE WE ALL 141 00:10:18,418 --> 00:10:21,955 GET ARRESTED." [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] BUT DON'T WORRY, IT COMES WITH 142 00:10:21,955 --> 00:10:24,190 AN OVERRIDE BUTTON, IN CASE YOUR BABY NEEDS TO TAKE CONTROL OF THE STROLLER. 143 00:10:24,190 --> 00:10:27,093 [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] ANOTHER INTERESTING PRODUCT BEING UNVEILED, IS THE 144 00:10:27,093 --> 00:10:35,335 HIGH-TECH SNORE SILENCING PILLOW [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] 145 00:10:35,335 --> 00:10:37,303 ALTHOUGH THAT'S ANY PILLOW IF YOU HOLD IT AGAINST SOMEONE'S FACE LONG ENOUGH, YOU KNOW WHAT 146 00:10:37,303 --> 00:10:41,708 I'M SAYING [ LAUGHTER ] A PILLOW THAT STOPS YOU FROM 147 00:10:41,708 --> 00:10:44,210 SNORING, WHICH HAS GOT TO BE THE MOST PASSIVE AGGRESSIVE GIFT OF ALL TIME 148 00:10:44,210 --> 00:10:53,520 [ LAUGHTER ] AND FINALLY, A 19-YEAR-OLD JUST TRAVELLED NEARLY 2,000 MILES 149 00:10:53,520 --> 00:10:59,392 FROM MAINE TO FLORIDA ON A A UNICYCLE [ AUDIENCE OOHS 150 00:10:59,392 --> 00:11:00,827 AND MUCH LIKE HIS WHEEL, IT'S A PRETTY SAFE BET THAT HE'S SINGLE 151 00:11:00,827 --> 00:11:03,229 YEAH [ LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE WE HAVE A GREAT SHOW 152 00:11:03,229 --> 00:11:05,699 GIVE IT UP FOR THE ROOTS, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN COME ON. 153 00:11:06,800 --> 00:11:16,076 [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE * >> Jimmy: WHAT A SHOW WE HAVE 154 00:11:16,076 --> 00:11:19,412 FOR YOU TONIGHT. THEY ARE CELEBRATING THEIR FIVE-YEAR ANNIVERSARY OF 155 00:11:19,412 --> 00:11:24,984 CO-ANCHORING "THE TODAY SHOW" TOGETHER, WHICH AIRS EVERY MORNING HERE ON NBC. 156 00:11:24,984 --> 00:11:27,921 SAVANNAH GUTHRIE AND HODA KOTB ARE HERE [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE 157 00:11:27,921 --> 00:11:34,094 COME ON! PLUS - >> Steve: OH, COME ON. 158 00:11:34,094 --> 00:11:36,796 >> Jimmy: HE'S ONE OF THE FUNNIEST - >> Steve: FUNNIEST HUMAN ALIVE 159 00:11:36,796 --> 00:11:40,200 >> Jimmy: -- SMARTEST, WITTIEST, WOULD YOU SAY? >> Steve: I WOULD SAY. 160 00:11:40,200 --> 00:11:42,669 QUICKEST >> Jimmy: YEAH HIS NEW SONG "COLIN QUINN: 161 00:11:42,669 --> 00:11:45,538 SMALL TALK" BEGINS PREVIEWS TOMORROW AT THE LUCILLE LORTEL THEATER, HERE IN NEW YORK CITY 162 00:11:45,538 --> 00:11:50,110 COLIN QUINN IS HERE TONIGHT! >> Steve: OH [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE 163 00:11:50,110 --> 00:11:52,245 >> Jimmy: "COLIN QUINN: SMALL TALK." AND WE'VE GOT GREAT MUSIC FROM 164 00:11:52,245 --> 00:11:56,249 MADISON CUNNINGHAM, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN. >> Steve: OH 165 00:11:56,249 --> 00:11:59,285 [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE >> Jimmy: MADISON CUNNINGHAM IT IS TIME FOR "TONIGHT SHOW 166 00:11:59,285 --> 00:12:00,920 IT IS TIME FOR "TONIGHT SHOW HASHTAGS." HERE WE GO 167 00:12:05,058 --> 00:12:11,097 HASHTAGS * 168 00:12:11,097 --> 00:12:12,966 >> Jimmy: NOW, WE DO THIS THING EVERY WEEK WHERE I SEND OUT A HASHTAG AND WE ASK YOU GUYS 169 00:12:12,966 --> 00:12:17,771 TO RESPOND TO THAT TOPIC SO, THIS WEEK I SENT OUT THE HASHTAG "THREE WORD 170 00:12:17,771 --> 00:12:22,075 RESOLUTION." AND I ASKED YOU TO TWEET OUT YOUR NEW YEAR'S RESOLUTION IN 171 00:12:22,075 --> 00:12:25,078 JUST THREE WORDS WITHIN MINUTES IT WAS A TRENDING TOPIC IN THE U.S., 172 00:12:25,078 --> 00:12:27,814 SO THANK YOU FOR PLAYING ALONG [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE WE DO IT EVERY WEEK. 173 00:12:27,814 --> 00:12:30,150 THANK YOU, THANK YOU NOW I THOUGHT I'D SHARE SOME OF MY FAVORITE THREE WORD 174 00:12:30,150 --> 00:12:33,953 RESOLUTION TWEETS FROM YOU GUYS HERE WE GO 175 00:12:33,953 --> 00:12:39,192 THIS FIRST ONE IS @2MUCHTODO56 SHE SAYS, "DON'T FLY SOUTHWEST. 176 00:12:39,192 --> 00:12:48,368 [ LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE THIS ONE'S FROM @VIDMAN. HE SAYS, "EAT HEALTHIER CANDY. 177 00:12:48,368 --> 00:12:51,538 WELL, THAT SOUNDS GOOD [ APPLAUSE ] THIS ONE'S FROM 178 00:12:51,538 --> 00:12:55,175 @RYANBARTHOLOMEE HE SAYS, "RELAX AT GYM." THERE YOU GO 179 00:12:55,175 --> 00:13:01,614 [ LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE THIS ONE'S FROM @LB64. SHE SAYS, "WORDLE, FIRST TRY." 180 00:13:01,614 --> 00:13:04,384 AH, RESPECT. [ APPLAUSE ] THIS ONE'S FROM 181 00:13:04,384 --> 00:13:09,489 @DUNDERMIFFLIN84 THEY SAY, "BREAKFAST ICE CREAM. 182 00:13:09,489 --> 00:13:13,293 HEY, NOT BAD [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE I LIKE THAT IDEA 183 00:13:13,293 --> 00:13:17,364 TONIGHT DOUGH. THIS ONE'S FROM @CALLIEGRAYACTS. 184 00:13:17,364 --> 00:13:20,200 SHE SAYS, "'LOSE' ROOMMATE'S CAT. AH, YEAH 185 00:13:20,200 --> 00:13:25,105 [ LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE >> Steve: I DON'T KNOW WHERE IT WENT TO. 186 00:13:25,105 --> 00:13:28,375 >> Jimmy: THIS ONE'S FROM @JULIACOLLINSART SHE SAYS, "FLOSS THY TEETH." 187 00:13:28,375 --> 00:13:32,445 [ LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE >> Steve: "THY"? WHY THE "THY"? 188 00:13:32,445 --> 00:13:34,848 >> Jimmy: WHAT >> Steve: WHY "THY"? >> Jimmy: WHAT ARE YOU TALKING 189 00:13:34,848 --> 00:13:39,319 ABOUT? >> Steve: "FLOSS THY TEETH"? WHAT IS THAT 190 00:13:39,319 --> 00:13:42,922 FORSOOTH >> Jimmy: "FLOSS THY TEETH." >> Steve: YES. 191 00:13:42,922 --> 00:13:48,728 [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] >> Jimmy: THIS ONE'S FROM @THEREALOLMUSKY. 192 00:13:48,728 --> 00:13:53,967 HE SAYS, "FIND THY ABS." [ LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE IT'S A THING, IT'S A THING 193 00:13:53,967 --> 00:13:58,338 >> Steve: THEY KNOW EACH OTHER >> Jimmy: THIS ONE'S FROM @ISLEEYA 194 00:13:58,338 --> 00:14:01,741 >> Steve: OH NO. >> Jimmy: HE SAYS, "LEARN HOW TO COUNT." 195 00:14:01,741 --> 00:14:04,044 [ LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE >> Steve: OH, GET IT >> Jimmy: THIS ONE'S FROM 196 00:14:04,044 --> 00:14:08,715 @ITSLORADIO. SHE SAYS, "START IN FEBRUARY." THAT'S PRETTY GOOD 197 00:14:08,715 --> 00:14:12,318 [ APPLAUSE ] THIS LAST ONE'S FROM @SHANNONMcCREADY 198 00:14:12,318 --> 00:14:14,521 SHE SAYS, "KEEP IT FUNKY!" HEY! >> Steve: YEAH 199 00:14:14,521 --> 00:14:17,157 [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE >> Jimmy: THOSE ARE "TONIGHT SHOW HASHTAGS. 200 00:14:17,157 --> 00:14:19,859 CHECK OUT MORE OF OUR FAVORITES. GO TO TONIGHTSHOW.COM/HASHTAGS 201 00:14:19,859 --> 00:14:21,961 WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK WITH "WHAT'S UP DOG?" COME ON BACK 202 00:14:21,961 --> 00:14:30,370 [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE * >> Jimmy: DOG PLAYS THE PIANO. 203 00:14:30,370 --> 00:14:32,238 >> YEAH. HE PLAYS THE PIANO AND SINGS AT THE SAME TIME. 204 00:14:32,238 --> 00:14:38,411 [ AUDIENCE OHs ] >> Jimmy: IT'S A DOUBLE -- I'VE GOT TO SEE THIS. 205 00:14:50,523 --> 00:14:55,662 >> Jimmy: WELCOME BACK, EVERYBODY. NOW, I LOVE DOGS, AND I REALLY 206 00:14:55,662 --> 00:14:58,832 LOVE TALENTED DOGS AND WE FOUND SOME TALENTED DOGS THAT WE THINK YOU'RE GOING TO 207 00:14:58,832 --> 00:15:02,035 THAT WE THINK YOU'RE GOING TO LOVE IT'S TIME FOR "WHAT'S UP DOG?" 208 00:15:04,371 --> 00:15:05,939 WHAT'S UP DO 209 00:15:05,939 --> 00:15:11,745 WHAT'S UP DOG * >> Jimmy: THIS IS "WHAT'S UP DOG? 210 00:15:11,745 --> 00:15:15,048 THE "TONIGHT SHOW" SHOWCASE FOR TALENTED DOGS. NOW, LET'S SAY WHAT'S UP TO OUR 211 00:15:15,048 --> 00:15:17,550 FIRST DOG. WELCOME. HEY. 212 00:15:17,550 --> 00:15:21,254 [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE HOW'RE YOU DOING NICE TO SEE YOU. 213 00:15:21,254 --> 00:15:24,090 HEY, BUD, NICE TO SEE YOU. HOW ARE YOU? HELLO -- HI. 214 00:15:24,090 --> 00:15:26,826 HOW'RE YOU DOING NICE TO SEE YOU. WHAT ARE YOUR GUY'S NAMES 215 00:15:26,826 --> 00:15:28,595 FIRST? >> I'M HAILEY. >> I'M NICK. 216 00:15:28,595 --> 00:15:31,631 >> Jimmy: HI HAILEY, NICK. AND YOUR DOG'S NAME? >> THIS IS DARRELL THE DOG 217 00:15:31,631 --> 00:15:36,236 >> Jimmy: HI, DARRELL THE DOG. HI -- HI, DARRELL. NICE TO -- OH, I SEE YOU'RE 218 00:15:36,236 --> 00:15:38,304 WEARING A BOWTIE THAT'S VERY NICE NOW, WHAT IS DARRELL'S TALENT? 219 00:15:38,304 --> 00:15:42,909 >> HE LOVES SPORTS BUT RIGHT NOW, HIS VERY FAVORITE IS HOCKEY 220 00:15:42,909 --> 00:15:45,645 >> Jimmy: HE LOVES HOCKEY. OKAY, INTERESTING. SO, WAIT, HE PLAYS HOCKEY? 221 00:15:45,645 --> 00:15:48,515 >> HE PLAYS HOCKEY >> Jimmy: OH, MY GOSH. ALL RIGHT, THIS IS GOING TO BE 222 00:15:48,515 --> 00:15:50,250 FANTASTIC. OH, WOW, HERE WE GO. ALL RIGHT, SO THERE'S A GOAL 223 00:15:50,250 --> 00:15:55,088 THERE. THERE'S A -- >> GOALIE. 224 00:15:55,088 --> 00:15:57,557 >> Jimmy: THERE'S A GOALIE I THOUGHT IT WAS A SLOTH OKAY, THANK YOU. 225 00:15:57,557 --> 00:16:01,494 >> ALSO THAT, ALSO THAT. >> Jimmy: SO, DARRELL -- SO, WHAT DO WE HAVE TO DO FOR THIS 226 00:16:01,494 --> 00:16:04,764 >> SO, I HAVE MY HANDYMAN OVER HERE >> Jimmy: OKAY, YEP. 227 00:16:04,764 --> 00:16:07,734 >> HE'S GOING TO HELP ME PUT THE BALL DOWN. AND FIRST, HE'S GOING TO GET 228 00:16:07,734 --> 00:16:13,506 HIMSELF READY AND PUMPED-UP. DARRELL. >> Jimmy: OH, WATCH OUT. 229 00:16:13,506 --> 00:16:16,343 HE'S WANDERING OFF [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] HE'S AN ATTACK DOG, EVERYBODY. 230 00:16:16,343 --> 00:16:18,878 DARRELL, COME HERE DARRELL? DARRELL, COME HERE 231 00:16:18,878 --> 00:16:20,714 COME ON, DARRELL >> NOW WE'RE GOING TO GIVE HIM THE STICK. 232 00:16:20,714 --> 00:16:23,049 ARE YOU READY BUD? YES, OH, YOU'RE READY. HE'S READY 233 00:16:23,049 --> 00:16:24,551 AND WE'RE GOING TO GIVE HIM THE STICK. AND HE'S GOING TO GO PLAY 234 00:16:24,551 --> 00:16:28,188 HOCKEY READY, BUD >> Jimmy: OH, DARRELL, GOOD 235 00:16:28,188 --> 00:16:30,557 JOB. >> YES LET'S PLAY HOCKEY. 236 00:16:30,557 --> 00:16:35,161 * [ LAUGHTER ] ALL RIGHT, YES 237 00:16:35,161 --> 00:16:38,064 WE'RE READY. >> Jimmy: NO, NO, THIS IS GOOD YEAH, I LIKE IT. 238 00:16:38,064 --> 00:16:39,966 >> WE'RE READY ALL RIGHT. >> Jimmy: GO FOR IT, DARRELL 239 00:16:39,966 --> 00:16:42,268 >> GO HOCKEY HOCKEY, BUD. [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] 240 00:16:42,268 --> 00:16:44,270 >> Jimmy: YOU'RE CLOSE HE'S GETTING IT. >> ALL RIGHT, THIRD TIME'S THE 241 00:16:44,270 --> 00:16:45,438 CHARM. >> Jimmy: NO, HE GOT IT, HE GOT IT 242 00:16:45,438 --> 00:16:47,707 COME ON, DARRELL COME ON, DARRELL MAYBE DON'T USE THE STICK. 243 00:16:47,707 --> 00:16:49,642 >> GO, GO, GO. [ LAUGHTER ] >> Jimmy: ARE YOU SURE THE DOG 244 00:16:49,642 --> 00:16:52,078 DOES THIS? [ LAUGHTER ] >> READY 245 00:16:52,078 --> 00:16:55,915 AND -- READY >> Jimmy: YEAH >> HOCKEY, BUD 246 00:16:55,915 --> 00:16:58,551 READY? HIT THE BALL HIT THE BALL 247 00:16:58,551 --> 00:17:01,021 >> Jimmy: YEAH, START THERE. >> LET'S START RIGHT THERE >> Jimmy: START THERE, DARRELL 248 00:17:01,021 --> 00:17:03,123 >> READY AND HOCKEY >> Jimmy: YES! 249 00:17:03,123 --> 00:17:05,759 [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE * >> Jimmy: DARRELL! 250 00:17:05,759 --> 00:17:08,595 DARRELL! DARRELL, COME HERE WOW! 251 00:17:08,595 --> 00:17:10,563 HIGH FIVE. HIGH FIVE. OH, THANK YOU. 252 00:17:10,563 --> 00:17:13,833 HE SHOOTS, HE SCORES DARRELL, GOOD JOB. DON'T BE SCARED, DARRELL 253 00:17:13,833 --> 00:17:15,535 YOU'RE OKAY. >> GOOD BOY. >> Jimmy: THANK YOU GUYS VERY 254 00:17:15,535 --> 00:17:19,205 MUCH GREAT JOB, DARRELL [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE 255 00:17:19,205 --> 00:17:23,043 BUILD THE SUSPENSE BUILD THE SUSPENSE WELL DONE. 256 00:17:23,043 --> 00:17:28,615 FOR A SECOND THERE, I'M NOT SURE THAT WAS DARRELL'S TALENT BUT YEAH - 257 00:17:28,615 --> 00:17:32,852 [ LAUGHTER ] HE GAVE ME A HIGH FIVE VERY QUICKLY. 258 00:17:32,852 --> 00:17:36,156 LET'S MEET OUR NEXT DOG. HERE WE GO * 259 00:17:36,156 --> 00:17:40,860 WOW. >> HELLO >> Jimmy: NICE TO SEE YOU. 260 00:17:40,860 --> 00:17:42,929 WHAT'S YOUR NAME >> MY NAME IS KELLY. >> Jimmy: HEY KELLY. 261 00:17:42,929 --> 00:17:46,099 WHAT'S THE DOG'S NAME? >> THIS IS ZAIN. >> Jimmy: HI ZAIN. 262 00:17:46,099 --> 00:17:50,804 OH, YEAH, OH YEAH. OH, WOW, WOW, WOW. NOW, ZAIN IS VERY CUTE 263 00:17:50,804 --> 00:17:55,508 WHAT DOES ZAIN DO? >> ZAIN IS GOING TO ACHIEVE EVERY DOG'S DREAM. 264 00:17:55,508 --> 00:17:58,211 HE'S GOING TO CHASE HIS TAIL AND CATCH IT [ LAUGHTER ] 265 00:17:58,211 --> 00:18:00,413 >> Jimmy: CHASE HIS TAIL AND CATCHES IT >> AND CATCH HIS OWN TAIL. 266 00:18:00,413 --> 00:18:03,817 >> Jimmy: NO, ZAIN - >> CAN YOU SIT >> Jimmy: WHAT'S HAPPENING 267 00:18:03,817 --> 00:18:07,620 >> CAN YOU WAVE HELLO? WAVE HELLO WAVE HELLO 268 00:18:07,620 --> 00:18:11,658 [ AWWs AND APPLAUSE GOOD BOY GOOD BOY 269 00:18:11,658 --> 00:18:14,027 GOOD >> Jimmy: THAT'S VERY CUTE I'LL LET YOU TAKE IT FROM HERE 270 00:18:14,027 --> 00:18:17,030 >> DOWN. ZAIN, ARE YOU SHY? ARE YOU SHY? 271 00:18:17,030 --> 00:18:23,703 [ AWWs AND APPLAUSE IT'S OKAY. YOU DON'T HAVE TO BE SHY 272 00:18:23,703 --> 00:18:30,910 CAN YOU GET YOUR TAIL? >> Jimmy: YES! [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE 273 00:18:30,910 --> 00:18:33,046 * THAT'S WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT. THAT'S WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT 274 00:18:33,046 --> 00:18:34,614 RIGHT THERE. ZAIN, WELL DONE! >> GOOD JOB. 275 00:18:34,614 --> 00:18:36,383 >> Jimmy: THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR BEING HERE >> YEAH, THANK YOU 276 00:18:36,383 --> 00:18:39,886 >> Jimmy: GOOD JOB, ZAIN THAT WAS GREAT THANK YOU VERY MUCH. 277 00:18:39,886 --> 00:18:44,457 NOT TOO SHABBY * NOW IT'S TIME TO MEET OUR LAST 278 00:18:44,457 --> 00:18:47,427 DOG. COME ON OVER HERE. HELLO. 279 00:18:47,427 --> 00:18:51,664 NICE TO SEE YOU. * NICE TO SEE YOU. 280 00:18:51,664 --> 00:18:54,100 WHAT IS YOUR NAME? >> MY NAME IS GLEN WOLFE >> Jimmy: HEY, GLEN. 281 00:18:54,100 --> 00:18:57,370 WHAT IS YOUR DOG'S NAME. >> BUDDY MERCURY [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] 282 00:18:57,370 --> 00:18:59,773 >> Jimmy: BUDDY MERCURY IS HERE OH, MY GOD 283 00:18:59,773 --> 00:19:01,841 HEY, BUDDY NICE TO SEE YOU. HOW ARE YOU? 284 00:19:01,841 --> 00:19:05,245 OH, WOW. HI, BUDDY. NICE TO SEE YOU. 285 00:19:05,245 --> 00:19:07,747 HOW OLD IS BUDDY >> HE'S ABOUT EIGHT. >> Jimmy: EIGHT YEARS OLD. 286 00:19:07,747 --> 00:19:11,685 WHEN DID YOU REALIZE HE, BUDDY HAD THIS TALENT? >> ABOUT FIVE OR SIX YEARS AGO 287 00:19:11,685 --> 00:19:15,088 >> Jimmy: YEAH SO, IT'S A GOOD BIT. FIVE OR SIX YEARS AGO. 288 00:19:15,088 --> 00:19:17,490 I'M ASSUMING THE DOG PLAYS THE PIANO. >> YEAH. 289 00:19:17,490 --> 00:19:21,728 HE PLAYS THE PIANO AND SINGS AT THE SAME TIME. [ AUDIENCE OHs ] 290 00:19:21,728 --> 00:19:24,130 >> Jimmy: IT'S A DOUBLE -- I'VE GOT TO SEE THIS. [ APPLAUSE ] 291 00:19:24,130 --> 00:19:26,032 NOW WE'RE TALKING. THIS IS IT WHENEVER YOU'RE READY, I'D LIKE 292 00:19:26,032 --> 00:19:33,873 TO SEE IT. THANK YOU, GLEN. * 293 00:19:33,873 --> 00:19:37,811 >> COME ON, GOOD BOY [ APPLAUSE ] >> Jimmy: VERY SHORT SONG. 294 00:19:37,811 --> 00:19:47,087 * [ DOG HOWLS [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE 295 00:19:47,087 --> 00:19:51,925 >> Jimmy: GOOD DOG GOOD DOG THAT'S A GREAT JOB 296 00:19:51,925 --> 00:19:54,194 THAT WAS FANTASTIC, BUDDY! OH, HEY, COME ON OVER HERE, BUDDY. 297 00:19:54,194 --> 00:19:56,730 * THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR BEING HERE 298 00:19:56,730 --> 00:19:58,898 GUYS, IF YOU HAVE A DOG WITH A A FUN TALENT, I WANT TO SEE IT SUBMIT A VIDEO OF YOUR DOG TO 299 00:19:58,898 --> 00:20:03,570 WHATSUPDOG@TONIGHTSHOW.COM STICK AROUND WE'LL BE BACK WITH 300 00:20:03,570 --> 00:20:08,541 SAVANNAH GUTHRIE AND HODA KOTB COME ON BACK GREAT JOB! 301 00:20:08,541 --> 00:20:12,479 [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE * >> I TOOK MY TWO GIRLS, HALEY 302 00:20:12,479 --> 00:20:15,648 AND HOPE, TO UNIVERSAL >> Jimmy: THEY'RE THE CUTEST KIDS 303 00:20:15,648 --> 00:20:17,150 >> FIRST OF ALL, THEY MET YOU HERE >> Jimmy: YEAH 304 00:20:17,150 --> 00:20:19,019 >> AND THEY ADORE YOU. SO, WHEN WE WERE WALKING AROUND, I GO, "LOOK, THERE'S A 305 00:20:19,019 --> 00:20:25,158 A JIMMY FALLON RIDE. JIMMY, SHE WAS TERRIFIED SHE KEPT GOING, "WHERE'S JIMMY, 306 00:20:25,158 --> 00:20:26,726 WHERE'S JIMMY? NO GET ME OUT, GET ME OUT, GET ME 307 00:20:26,726 --> 00:20:28,595 GET ME OUT, GET ME OUT, GET ME OUT! [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] 308 00:20:45,111 --> 00:20:51,017 CELEBRATING THEIR FIVE-YEAR ANNIVERSARY OF CO-ANCHORING "THE TODAY SHOW," WHICH AIRS 309 00:20:51,017 --> 00:20:55,055 EVERY MORNING HERE ON NBC. PLEASE WELCOME SAVANNAH GUTHRIE AND HODA KOTB! 310 00:20:57,991 --> 00:21:15,508 * * [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE 311 00:21:15,508 --> 00:21:17,911 >> HI, HI, HI. >> Jimmy: WELCOME BACK >> JIMMY 312 00:21:17,911 --> 00:21:19,879 >> Jimmy: LOOK AT YOU. YOU'RE THE HARDEST WORKING PEOPLE IN SHOW BUSINESS. 313 00:21:19,879 --> 00:21:22,415 >> OH, STOP IT YOU ARE. >> Jimmy: YOU START THE NETWORK 314 00:21:22,415 --> 00:21:24,584 IN THE MORNING - >> WE OPENED IT. >> Jimmy: AND YOU'RE CLOSING - 315 00:21:24,584 --> 00:21:26,653 >> WE'RE SHUTTING IT DOWN. >> Jimmy: SHUTTING IT DOWN WITH "THE TONIGHT SHOW. 316 00:21:26,653 --> 00:21:29,089 COME ON. >> COME ON >> Jimmy: THANK YOU AGAIN FOR 317 00:21:29,089 --> 00:21:30,724 COMING BACK. >> WE LOVE YOU >> Jimmy: I ALWAYS LOVE SEEING 318 00:21:30,724 --> 00:21:32,826 YOU. I WATCH YOU EVERY SINGLE DAY YOU FINALLY GOT A LITTLE TIME 319 00:21:32,826 --> 00:21:35,295 OFF DURING THE HOLIDAYS. >> WE DID. >> Jimmy: A LITTLE BREAK 320 00:21:35,295 --> 00:21:37,297 >> OH, MY GOD. >> Jimmy: WHAT'D YOU DO? >> OKAY, SO JIMMY, I TOOK MY 321 00:21:37,297 --> 00:21:39,666 TWO GIRLS, HALEY AND HOPE, TO UNIVERSAL. >> Jimmy: THEY'RE THE CUTEST 322 00:21:39,666 --> 00:21:41,634 KIDS >> FIRST OF ALL, THEY MET YOU HERE - 323 00:21:41,634 --> 00:21:43,703 >> Jimmy: YEAH >> -- AND THEY ADORE YOU SO, WHEN WE'RE WALKING AROUND, 324 00:21:43,703 --> 00:21:48,742 "I GO, LOOK, THERE'S A A JIMMY FALLON RIDE. >> Jimmy: I HAVE MY OWN RIDE 325 00:21:48,742 --> 00:21:53,013 >> WAIT, YOU HAVE YOUR OWN -- HAVE YOU ALL EVER BEEN ON IT [ AUDIENCE ANSWERS ] 326 00:21:53,013 --> 00:21:57,384 IT'S -- OKAY, IT'S REALLY FUN. SO, MY 3-YEAR-OLD PUT THE GLASSES ON, YOU GET LOCKED IN. 327 00:21:57,384 --> 00:22:02,622 IT'S LIKE YOU'RE IN "THE TONIGHT SHOW." JIMMY -- SHE WAS TERRIFIED 328 00:22:02,622 --> 00:22:05,158 SHE IS LIKE SCARRED. >> Jimmy: I DON'T THINK SHE CAN DO THAT. 329 00:22:05,158 --> 00:22:08,762 >> SHE LOVED YOU - >> Jimmy: SHE'S TOO YOUNG. >> BUT NOW -- YEAH, SHE JUST - 330 00:22:08,762 --> 00:22:11,164 >> DID SHE THROW UP? >> SHE JUST MADE THE HEIGHT. SHE DIDN'T THROW UP. 331 00:22:11,164 --> 00:22:13,233 >> Jimmy: DID SHE UNDERSTAND WHAT WAS HAPPENING >> JIMMY, SHE WAS TERRIFIED. 332 00:22:13,233 --> 00:22:16,169 SHE KEPT GOING, "WHERE'S JIMMY WHERE'S JIMMY? NO 333 00:22:16,169 --> 00:22:17,837 GET ME OUT, GET ME OUT, GET ME OUT! AND YOU CAN'T GET OUT ONCE 334 00:22:17,837 --> 00:22:19,239 YOU'RE IN. >> Jimmy: JUST LIKE "THE TONIGHT SHOW." 335 00:22:19,239 --> 00:22:22,208 YEAH, THEY'RE ALL STRAPPED IN. [ LAUGHTER ] THEY'RE NOT ALLOWED TO LEAVE 336 00:22:22,208 --> 00:22:25,145 >> BY THE WAY, IT WAS SUPER FUN. BUT SHE WAS WAY TOO LITTLE 337 00:22:25,145 --> 00:22:27,447 >> Jimmy: OH, MY GOSH. >> BUT YOU HAVE TO, LIKE, COME AND HUG HER. 338 00:22:27,447 --> 00:22:30,283 >> Jimmy: ALL RIGHT. NEXT TIME, BRING HER OVER. YEAH, I'LL COME BY AND SEE YOU 339 00:22:30,283 --> 00:22:33,086 YOU HAVE A BIRTHDAY AROUND CHRISTMAS. >> YES, I DO 340 00:22:33,086 --> 00:22:35,989 THE COVETED TWO DAYS AFTER CHRISTMAS BIRTHDAY WHEN EVERYBODY WAS REALLY IN 341 00:22:35,989 --> 00:22:40,326 THE MOOD TO CELEBRATE. [ LAUGHTER ] AND ALSO, I TURNED 51. 342 00:22:40,326 --> 00:22:43,730 >> Jimmy: OH, MY GOSH. HAPPY BIRTHDAY >> WHICH IS SO NOT EXCITING. 343 00:22:43,730 --> 00:22:45,932 [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE >> Jimmy: YES! COME ON. 344 00:22:45,932 --> 00:22:48,101 >> IT IS EXCITING. >> BUT MY LITTLE BOY ASKED ME LITERALLY THE OTHER DAY -- 345 00:22:48,101 --> 00:22:49,836 YOU KNOW HOW WHEN THEY'RE LITTLE, THEY'RE LIKE, THEY HAVE THE 4-YEAR-OLD VISIT, THE 346 00:22:49,836 --> 00:22:53,673 5-YEAR-OLD VISIT MY LITTLE BOY GOES, "MOMMY, DID YOU HAVE YOUR 51-YEAR-OLD 347 00:22:53,673 --> 00:22:56,509 VISIT? >> Jimmy: OH, NO >> I KNOW. 348 00:22:56,509 --> 00:22:59,479 AND I WAS LIKE, "YEAH, THEY WEIGHED AND MEASURED ME. I GOT THE SHINGLES VACCINE." 349 00:22:59,479 --> 00:23:03,183 YEAH, SO, WE DID THAT. AND IT WAS FUN >> Jimmy: IT WAS FUN - 350 00:23:03,183 --> 00:23:04,951 >> YEAH. >> Jimmy: DID YOU GET ANY GOOD GIFTS? 351 00:23:04,951 --> 00:23:06,586 >> YOU KNOW WHAT THE CUTEST THING IS THE KIDS ACTUALLY WROTE DOWN 352 00:23:06,586 --> 00:23:10,290 WHAT THEY LIKED ABOUT ME WHICH IS REALLY -- >> OH, MY -- 353 00:23:10,290 --> 00:23:13,126 >> Jimmy: ARE YOU JOKING >> I KNOW. I KNOW 354 00:23:13,126 --> 00:23:15,862 AND I THINK THEY WERE, LIKE, YOU KNOW, PROMPTED TO DO THAT. BUT MY LITTLE BOY SAID I 355 00:23:15,862 --> 00:23:20,467 SMELLED GOOD >> Jimmy: HEY. >> YES 356 00:23:20,467 --> 00:23:23,970 AND MY DAUGHTER SAID, SHE ACTS LIKE A LITTLE GIRL AND THAT I SING, BUT BADLY. 357 00:23:23,970 --> 00:23:27,073 >> Jimmy: NO >> YES >> Jimmy: STILL, YOU TAKE IT 358 00:23:27,073 --> 00:23:29,209 >> I KNOW. IT WAS GOOD. >> Jimmy: THAT'S SO CUTE 359 00:23:29,209 --> 00:23:31,177 >> YEAH. >> Jimmy: COME ON. BEFORE WE TALK ABOUT THE FIVE 360 00:23:31,177 --> 00:23:33,146 YEARS, I WANT TO TALK ABOUT YOUR NEW PODCAST TALK TO ME ABOUT THIS. 361 00:23:33,146 --> 00:23:36,216 "MAKING SPACE. >> BY THE WAY, I LOVE THIS PODCAST, JIMMY 362 00:23:36,216 --> 00:23:39,586 THERE ARE CERTAIN THINGS YOU DO AND YOU'RE CRAZY ABOUT THIS WHOLE -- THIS PODCAST IS 363 00:23:39,586 --> 00:23:44,524 ALL KIND OF INSPIRATIONAL LEADERS AND TEACHERS SO - 364 00:23:44,524 --> 00:23:46,793 >> Jimmy: YOU LOVE -- YOU'RE GOOD AT -- YOU LOVE THAT >> I'M SO -- I'M SO IN 365 00:23:46,793 --> 00:23:49,329 I FEEL LIKE IF I WASN'T DOING THE PODCAST, LIKE, I WOULD BE LISTENING TO IT. 366 00:23:49,329 --> 00:23:53,133 BUT WE HAD THIS LADY ON NAMED MEL ROBBINS, WHO'S A VERY, LIKE, SHE'S A MOTIVATIONAL 367 00:23:53,133 --> 00:23:58,371 SPEAKER. >> Jimmy: YEAH >> AND SHE WAS SAYING TO -- SHE 368 00:23:58,371 --> 00:24:01,841 WAS SAYING, "LOOK, IN THE NEW YEAR, YOU SHOULD DO -- YOU CAN START OFF BY THIS RESOLUTION." 369 00:24:01,841 --> 00:24:03,643 SHE SAID, "THE VERY FIRST DECISION YOU MAKE EVERY MORNING WHEN YOU WAKE UP, THE VERY, 370 00:24:03,643 --> 00:24:05,512 VERY FIRST DECISION WHEN YOUR ALARM GOES OFF, IS YOU'RE GOING TO DECIDE WHETHER OR NOT YOU'RE 371 00:24:05,512 --> 00:24:12,052 GOING TO PROCRASTINATE TO START YOUR DAY OR YOU'RE GOING TOHOP UP." 372 00:24:12,052 --> 00:24:16,656 SHE SAID, "THE VERY FIRST DECISION YOU MAKE IN THE MORNING, NEVER EVER HIT SNOOZE 373 00:24:16,656 --> 00:24:21,895 FEET ON THE FLOOR, GET UP, GET TO THE SHOWER RIGHT AWAY MAKE YOUR BED RIGHT AWAY 374 00:24:21,895 --> 00:24:24,531 AND SHE SAID, ONCE YOU DO THOSE THINGS - >> Jimmy: I DON'T KNOW 375 00:24:24,531 --> 00:24:27,133 >> ONCE YOU DO THOSE - >> Jimmy: I DON'T KNOW ABOUT THIS 376 00:24:27,133 --> 00:24:29,069 >> JIMMY, THAT MEANS THE WHOLE -- >> Jimmy: I MIGHT DO THE FIRST 377 00:24:29,069 --> 00:24:32,072 ONE. BUT I CAN'T DO BOTH THINGS >> THAT'S TOO MUCH 378 00:24:32,072 --> 00:24:36,076 [ LAUGHTER ] >> Jimmy: FEELS LIKE I'M IN THE -- 379 00:24:36,076 --> 00:24:38,845 >> IT'S A LOT. >> Jimmy: YEAH, THE ARMED FORCES 380 00:24:38,845 --> 00:24:41,448 I WANT TO TALK ABOUT "TODAY. >> UH-HUH. >> Jimmy: OKAY 381 00:24:41,448 --> 00:24:43,650 THIS IS -- THIS IS A LANDMARK SHOW, OBVIOUSLY, ONE OF THE -- "TONIGHT SHOW," "TODAY SHOW. 382 00:24:43,650 --> 00:24:45,618 RECENTLY WE LOST A LEGEND, JOURNALIST BARBARA WALTERS, WHO WAS ON "THE TODAY SHOW" FOR 383 00:24:45,618 --> 00:24:50,857 15 YEARS WHAT DID HER LEGACY LEAVE BEHIND 384 00:24:50,857 --> 00:24:56,229 WHAT DOES SHE MEAN TO YOU GUYS >> I THINK SHE SAID IT BEST WHEN WE, A FEW YEARS AGO, WHEN 385 00:24:56,229 --> 00:25:00,266 SHE RETIRED FROM THE VIEW. THEY INVITED NEWS WOMEN PAST AND PRESENT. 386 00:25:00,266 --> 00:25:02,869 AND EVERYONE WALKED OUT AND SURPRISED HER. AND, I MEAN, EVERYBODY WAS 387 00:25:02,869 --> 00:25:06,806 THERE. OPRAH WAS THERE, EVERYONE. AND BARBARA LOOKED AROUND, AND 388 00:25:06,806 --> 00:25:08,575 SHE SAID, YOU GUYS ARE MY LEGACY >> YEAH. 389 00:25:08,575 --> 00:25:10,810 >> AND I THINK WE KNOW THAT THAT IS TRUE I MEAN, AT "THE TODAY SHOW" IN 390 00:25:10,810 --> 00:25:14,814 PARTICULAR, WE'RE NOT HERE WITHOUT BARBARA WALTERS KNOCKING DOWN THAT DOOR. 391 00:25:14,814 --> 00:25:18,418 AND DOING IT WHEN THERE WAS NO PRECEDENT. THERE WAS NO EXAMPLE 392 00:25:18,418 --> 00:25:23,223 THERE WAS NO REPRESENTATION OF -- OF THAT PATH SHE DID IT 393 00:25:23,223 --> 00:25:27,093 SHE BLAZED THE TRAIL LIKE A PIONEER. >> WE ARE ABLE TO SIT AND HAVE 394 00:25:27,093 --> 00:25:30,964 TWO WOMEN ANCHORING TOGETHER, WHICH IS NOW TOTALLY NORMAL, BECAUSE OF WHAT BARBARA DID. 395 00:25:30,964 --> 00:25:33,166 >> Jimmy: BUT WHAT DID -- YEAH, YOU SAY BARBARA WALTERS -- YEAH, OF COURSE. 396 00:25:33,166 --> 00:25:36,436 SHE WAS A TRAILBLAZER. BUT THINK ABOUT THAT THAT'S FIVE YEARS OF DOING THIS 397 00:25:36,436 --> 00:25:39,506 TOGETHER WHEN YOU FIRST WERE SAT TOGETHER AND YOU OPENED "THE 398 00:25:39,506 --> 00:25:41,675 TODAY SHOW," - >> YEAH, YEAH, YEAH. >> Jimmy: -- DID IT FEEL LIKE 399 00:25:41,675 --> 00:25:44,210 A MOMENT TO YOU? >> IT FELT LIKE A MOMENT, BUT NOT BECAUSE IT WAS TWO WOMEN 400 00:25:44,210 --> 00:25:47,580 IT WAS BECAUSE IT WAS US >> YEAH. >> YOU KNOW, IT WAS -- WE 401 00:25:47,580 --> 00:25:51,418 LITERALLY HELD HANDS AND SAID, LET'S DO THIS. >> LET'S GO. 402 00:25:51,418 --> 00:25:54,254 YOU KNOW, AND IT WAS JUST -- >> Jimmy: BUT IT WAS A MOMENT FOR WOMEN, I WOULD THINK 403 00:25:54,254 --> 00:25:56,990 >> I THINK IT WAS. WE DIDN'T REALIZE IT, BECAUSE I REMEMBER I WENT TO A SOUL CYCLE 404 00:25:56,990 --> 00:26:00,727 SPIN CLASS AND I WALKED IN SHORTLY AFTER SAVANNAH AND I HAD STARTED 405 00:26:00,727 --> 00:26:04,764 AND I SAT IN THE SAME SEAT I ALWAYS SAT IN IN SUE'S SOUL CYCLE CLASS. 406 00:26:04,764 --> 00:26:07,267 AND I SAT IN MY CHAIR, AND PEOPLE STARTED CLAPPING. AND I WAS LIKE, OH, MY GOD, 407 00:26:07,267 --> 00:26:09,602 SOMEONE HAS A BIRTHDAY YOU KNOW HOW THEY DO >> Jimmy: YEAH, THE BIG CLAP, 408 00:26:09,602 --> 00:26:13,406 THEY ROOT FOR EACH OTHER YOU GO >> YOU GOT IT, YEAH. 409 00:26:13,406 --> 00:26:16,242 >> Jimmy: YOU GOT IT >> 50 LOOKS GOOD ANYWAY 410 00:26:16,242 --> 00:26:19,412 AND AS I WAS SITTING, I WAS LOOKING AROUND AND THEY WERE LOOKING AT ME. 411 00:26:19,412 --> 00:26:22,782 AND I SAID -- I GO, WHAT'S GOING ON THEY GO, WHAT YOU AND SAVANNAH 412 00:26:22,782 --> 00:26:26,619 DID TODAY. IT WAS BIG IT WAS BIG 413 00:26:26,619 --> 00:26:29,556 AND I TOLD SAVANNAH, I SAID, "OH, MY GOD, IT MATTERED." LIKE, WE DIDN'T REALIZE, I 414 00:26:29,556 --> 00:26:33,927 THINK, IN THE MOMENT, THAT IT DID, AND NOW - >> Jimmy: HAVE YOU SEEN THINGS 415 00:26:33,927 --> 00:26:38,865 CHANGE SINCE YOU'VE STARTED? >> YOU KNOW, ONE THING THAT WE NOTICED A LOT, IS IN LOCAL 416 00:26:38,865 --> 00:26:40,600 NEWS -- WHICH WE CAME UP IN LOCAL NEWS -- YOU KNOW, IF SOMEBODY WAS GONE, AND YOU 417 00:26:40,600 --> 00:26:44,871 NEEDED A SUB, IT WAS ALWAYS A GUY AND A GIRL >> YEAH, YEAH. 418 00:26:44,871 --> 00:26:48,274 >> IT WAS ALWAYS A MAN AND A A WOMAN. IT WAS LIKE DINA AND TODD. 419 00:26:48,274 --> 00:26:50,677 OR WHOEVER AND WHOEVER >> YEAH. >> THEY WOULD NEVER PUT TWO 420 00:26:50,677 --> 00:26:52,946 WOMEN -- THEY WOULD NEVER SAY, "OH, TODD'S OFF TONIGHT. HODA CAN YOU FILL IN 421 00:26:52,946 --> 00:26:54,914 SAVANNAH?" NO WE CAN'T HAVE TWO WOMEN. 422 00:26:54,914 --> 00:26:56,916 >> Jimmy: TWO WOMEN. >> NOW, WE NOTICE, BECAUSE WE DO ALL THESE AFFILIATE CROSS 423 00:26:56,916 --> 00:26:58,752 TAGS AND WE SEE IT IN LOCAL NEWS ALL THE TIME 424 00:26:58,752 --> 00:27:00,720 THERE ARE A LOT OF FEMALE PARTNERSHIPS >> YEAH. 425 00:27:00,720 --> 00:27:02,689 >> SO, I DON'T KNOW IF THAT'S - >> WHY NOT 426 00:27:02,689 --> 00:27:04,758 >> -- PROBABLY NOT BECAUSE OF US, BUT NOW IT'S JUST MORE NORMAL 427 00:27:04,758 --> 00:27:08,795 AND I THINK THAT'S REALLY COOL >> Jimmy: I THINK IT IS BECAUSE OF YOU GUYS, YEAH. 428 00:27:08,795 --> 00:27:11,865 >> TODD SHOULDN'T HAVE TAKEN ALL THAT TIME OFF. >> Jimmy: NO, EXACTLY RIGHT, 429 00:27:11,865 --> 00:27:15,168 YEAH >> AND YOU KNOW WHAT ELSE IS REALLY COOL? 430 00:27:15,168 --> 00:27:17,337 >> Jimmy: YEAH >> GUESS WHO'S COMING BACK TOMORROW, JIMMY, ON OUR SHOW 431 00:27:17,337 --> 00:27:19,406 >> Jimmy: AL >> GUESS WHO'S COMING BACK >> Jimmy: AL ROKER 432 00:27:19,406 --> 00:27:22,375 >> YES >> Jimmy: AL ROKER'S BACK? [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE 433 00:27:22,375 --> 00:27:24,344 WE LOVE YOU, AL. NO, NO, NO I'M GOING TO LOSE IT 434 00:27:24,344 --> 00:27:27,380 I LOVE -- I'M GOING TO LOSE IT I LOVE THAT GUY SO MUCH. >> YOU SENT HIM SUCH COOL 435 00:27:27,380 --> 00:27:29,816 VIDEOS WHEN HE WAS IN THE HOSPITAL >> Jimmy: HE'S SUCH A GOOD GUY 436 00:27:29,816 --> 00:27:32,052 I CAN'T WAIT ALL RIGHT. GOOD 437 00:27:32,052 --> 00:27:34,187 I'LL TRY TO WATCH -- I'LL COME IN TOMORROW EARLY JUST TO SAY HI TO HIM. 438 00:27:34,187 --> 00:27:36,456 >> NO, YOU WILL NOT. >> YOU'LL HAVE TO WAKE UP IN THE MORNING HOURS. 439 00:27:36,456 --> 00:27:39,359 >> Jimmy: I WON'T HIT SNOOZE YEAH, EXACTLY. BUT REALLY, I WANTED TO THANK 440 00:27:39,359 --> 00:27:41,061 YOU FOR COMING ON THE SHOW AGAIN, BUT ALSO THANK YOU FOR WHAT YOU'RE DOING AND WHAT 441 00:27:41,061 --> 00:27:42,362 YOU'VE DONE. FIVE YEARS, THIS IS MASSIVE WHAT YOU'RE DOING. 442 00:27:42,362 --> 00:27:45,432 AND YOU'RE THE BEST. I WATCH YOU EVERY MORNING. YOU'RE THE GREATEST. 443 00:27:45,432 --> 00:27:47,834 THANK YOU, GUYS, SO MUCH >> JIMMY, WE LOVE YOU. WE LOVE YOU. 444 00:27:47,834 --> 00:27:49,502 [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE >> Jimmy: SAVANNAH GUTHRIE, HODA KOTB, NO ONE BETTER, RIGHT 445 00:27:49,502 --> 00:27:52,872 HERE ON "THE TODAY SHOW" ON NBC. WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK WITH 446 00:27:52,872 --> 00:27:55,075 COLIN QUINN, EVERYBODY STICK AROUND [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE 447 00:27:55,075 --> 00:28:16,663 * >> Jimmy: OUR NEXT GUEST IS A VERY FUNNY COMEDIAN AND 448 00:28:16,663 --> 00:28:19,866 WRITER, WHOSE NEW SHOW, "COLIN QUINN: SMALL TALK" BEGINS PREVIEWS AT THE 449 00:28:19,866 --> 00:28:24,204 LUCILLE LORTEL THEATER FOR LIMITED ENGAGEMENT EVERYONE, PLEASE WELCOME 450 00:28:24,204 --> 00:28:25,705 LIMITED ENGAGEMENT EVERYONE, PLEASE WELCOME COLIN QUINN! 451 00:28:29,709 --> 00:28:36,349 * >> Jimmy: COME ON NOW. 452 00:28:36,349 --> 00:28:39,252 OH, MY GOODNESS. COME ON. RETURNING -- RETURNING TO THE 453 00:28:39,252 --> 00:28:45,625 STAGE. >> YES, COMEDIAN AND WRITER. I LIKE THAT. 454 00:28:45,625 --> 00:28:48,695 >> Jimmy: YEAH, ME TOO >> I GUESS MY PEOPLE SAID, "THROW IN WRITER, SO PEOPLE 455 00:28:48,695 --> 00:28:53,299 WILL BE LIKE, HE'S -- OH." >> Jimmy: THIS IS EXCITING YOU ON THE STAGE 456 00:28:53,299 --> 00:28:56,670 YOU'RE THE NEW "FUNNY GIRL." YOU'RE REPLACING LEA MICHELE IN "FUNNY GIRL. 457 00:28:56,670 --> 00:29:00,006 [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] THAT'S WHAT WE'RE TALKING ABOUT. 458 00:29:00,006 --> 00:29:02,375 THIS IS "SMALL TALK. >> YEAH. >> Jimmy: ARE YOU -- I'M TRYING 459 00:29:02,375 --> 00:29:06,079 TO THINK DO YOU LIKE SMALL TALK >> I LOVE SMALL TALK 460 00:29:06,079 --> 00:29:09,249 I'M GREAT AT -- MY WHOLE LIFE, I TALK TO EVERYBODY. YOU -- I MEAN, I FEEL LIKE 461 00:29:09,249 --> 00:29:15,055 YOU'RE KIND OF LIKE THAT TOO, LIKE A FRIENDLY TYPE PERSON. I GO IN THE STORE, YOU KNOW, 462 00:29:15,055 --> 00:29:18,091 YOU HAVE A LITTLE CONVERSATION LITTLE -- "YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN?" 463 00:29:18,091 --> 00:29:21,928 SHOULDN'T -- [ LAUGHTER ] "LITTLE TOO MUCH ON THE 464 00:29:21,928 --> 00:29:26,299 HOLIDAYS I ATE TOO MUCH." A LITTLE BONDING MOMENT. 465 00:29:26,299 --> 00:29:28,234 >> Jimmy: YEAH, YOU DO THOSE THINGS YOU THROW LITTLE BONDING 466 00:29:28,234 --> 00:29:30,337 MOMENTS. >> I FEEL LIKE YOU DO THAT TOO WITH PEOPLE? 467 00:29:30,337 --> 00:29:34,074 >> Jimmy: I DO A LITTLE BIT. >> DON'T SOUND DEFENSIVE IT'S A POSITIVE QUALITY. 468 00:29:34,074 --> 00:29:36,343 [ LAUGHTER ] >> Jimmy: DEFENSIVE? >> YOU DID 469 00:29:36,343 --> 00:29:40,747 HIS VOICE GOES, "I DO. >> Jimmy: NO >> YOUR VOICE WENT UP LIKE, 470 00:29:40,747 --> 00:29:42,582 "HEY." >> Jimmy: YOU KNOW WHAT I KEEP THINKING OF? 471 00:29:42,582 --> 00:29:45,352 >> WHAT? >> Jimmy: DO YOU REMEMBER WHEN WE WERE BACK ON "SATURDAY NIGHT 472 00:29:45,352 --> 00:29:48,588 LIVE," YOU WERE ALWAYS VERY NICE TO ME, BY THE WAY I CONSIDER YOU THE WHOLE REASON 473 00:29:48,588 --> 00:29:51,658 I HAVE THE SHOW IS BECAUSE YOU >> WHAT? [ LAUGHTER ] 474 00:29:51,658 --> 00:29:56,062 >> Jimmy: ANYWAYS, DO YOU REMEMBER - YOU KNOW WHAT I WAS THINKING 475 00:29:56,062 --> 00:29:58,865 DO YOU REMEMBER WHEN - >> I DIDN'T WANNA BELIEVE IT >> Jimmy: YEAH, NO, I DID. 476 00:29:58,865 --> 00:30:01,267 BUT, WHEN WE WOULD GO GET TEA AT, LIKE, 2:00 IN THE MORNING. >> YES, EXACTLY. 477 00:30:01,267 --> 00:30:07,741 >> Jimmy: THIS DELI AT THIS BODEGA >> THE BODEGA. 478 00:30:07,741 --> 00:30:10,477 THAT GUY WAS AN OLYMPIC JUDO CHAMPION, ACCORDING TO HIM I'M SURE HE COULD JUST SAY IT. 479 00:30:10,477 --> 00:30:12,545 [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] >> Jimmy: HOW DO YOU KNOW ALL THIS ABOUT THIS GUY? 480 00:30:12,545 --> 00:30:16,049 >> FROM SMALL TALKING. >> Jimmy: SMALL TALK BUT I REMEMBER WE WERE GOING 481 00:30:16,049 --> 00:30:18,651 AND SOMEBODY YELLS - BECAUSE WALKING WITH COLIN QUINN IN NEW YORK CITY IS 482 00:30:18,651 --> 00:30:22,055 LIKE THE MAYOR "COLIN, COLIN QUINN. COME ON BACK TO BROOKLYN, MAN. 483 00:30:22,055 --> 00:30:25,358 >> IT'S LIKE A BAD COMMERCIAL. LIKE, "HEY, PAL. >> Jimmy: I REMEMBER THE GUY 484 00:30:25,358 --> 00:30:31,331 GOES, "YO, COLIN, COME HERE. AND YOU GO, "YOU COME HERE." [ LAUGHTER ] 485 00:30:31,331 --> 00:30:35,402 >> YEAH, BECAUSE THAT WAS, LIKE, A POWER MOVE GUYS LIKE, "HEY, COLIN." 486 00:30:35,402 --> 00:30:37,904 HE WASN'T DO ANYTHING THAT COULDN'T BE -- HE'S LIKE CALLING ME OVER. 487 00:30:37,904 --> 00:30:42,175 WHY ARE YOU TAKING HIS SIDE? YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW THE GUY? [ LAUGHTER ] 488 00:30:42,175 --> 00:30:47,514 YOU SOUND LIKE A REAL LOON CALL ME OVER YOU DON'T CALL ME OVER HERE. 489 00:30:47,514 --> 00:30:49,049 >> Jimmy: YOU GO, "YOU COME OVER HERE. YEAH, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?" 490 00:30:49,049 --> 00:30:51,017 BUT HERE'S THE THING ABOUT "SMALL TALK. IT'S - 491 00:30:51,017 --> 00:30:59,659 [ LAUGHTER ] IS THAT -- IT IS IT'S ABOUT BEING FRIENDLY. 492 00:30:59,659 --> 00:31:01,594 AND IT'S SO FUNNY TO ME BECAUSE ONE OF THE CRITICISMS YOU ALWAYS HEAR IS, "OH, JIMMY'S SO 493 00:31:01,594 --> 00:31:07,967 ENTHUSIASTIC SO FRIENDLY WITH HIS GUESTS. IT'S LIKE, "YEAH, WHAT IS HE 494 00:31:07,967 --> 00:31:10,270 SUPPOSED TO -- HE BRINGS 'EM OUT, 'HEY, I HEARD YOUR NEW MOVIE. 495 00:31:10,270 --> 00:31:14,641 SOUNDS LIKE IT SUCKS.' YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN [ LAUGHTER ] 496 00:31:14,641 --> 00:31:17,811 >> Jimmy: I CAN'T DO THAT. >> NO, YOU CAN'T GOTTA YOU'RE NICE. 497 00:31:17,811 --> 00:31:19,646 >> Jimmy: NO, EXACTLY, YEAH. WITHOUT MOVIES AND TV, I WOULDN'T HAVE A SHOW 498 00:31:19,646 --> 00:31:21,281 >> EXACTLY >> Jimmy: I WANT THEM ALL TO WORK 499 00:31:21,281 --> 00:31:23,717 >> PEOPLE THINK SULLEN IS SO HIP. WELL, GUESS WHAT 500 00:31:23,717 --> 00:31:26,986 I DON'T BUY IT MUSICIANS ARE DIFFERENT. YOU'RE ALLOWED TO BE SULLEN. 501 00:31:26,986 --> 00:31:31,558 DIFFERENT VIBE I'M TALKING ABOUT IN COMEDY. >> Jimmy: I'M TALKING ABOUT 502 00:31:31,558 --> 00:31:33,460 THIS GUY I'M TALKING ABOUT "SMALL TALK. I'M ALSO TALKING ABOUT THIS 503 00:31:33,460 --> 00:31:39,766 GUY. [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE >> Jimmy: DUDE, WHAT 504 00:31:39,766 --> 00:31:42,502 WHAT IN THE WORLD? WHO IS THIS? WHO IS THIS? 505 00:31:42,502 --> 00:31:46,206 >> GIVE ME A BREAK >> Jimmy: WHO IS THIS? WHAT PORNO IS THIS FROM? 506 00:31:46,206 --> 00:31:53,113 [ LAUGHTER ] >> I WAS HUNG OVER >> Jimmy: A CALENDAR 507 00:31:53,113 --> 00:32:00,420 YOU'RE VERY GOOD LOOKING >> YOU SEE THE NEW CHIPPENDALES SHOW 508 00:32:00,420 --> 00:32:02,055 >> Jimmy: YOU'RE A VERY GOOD LOOKING GUY. YOU'RE A VERY GOOD LOOKING GUY 509 00:32:02,055 --> 00:32:04,391 >> I REALLY WAS. THAT WAS A GREAT PICTURE THE GUY WAS JUST A HUNGOVER 510 00:32:04,391 --> 00:32:07,660 FRIEND OF MINE HE HAD A CAMERA AND TOOK A A PICTURE. 511 00:32:07,660 --> 00:32:09,295 THEY NEEDED PICTURES IN THOSE DAYS YOU GO OUT, AND YOU HAND AROUND 512 00:32:09,295 --> 00:32:11,131 YOUR PICTURES. >> Jimmy: OF COURSE. >> YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN? 513 00:32:11,131 --> 00:32:13,867 >> Jimmy: FORGET AUDITIONS AND STUFF LIKE THAT. >> STUFF LIKE THAT 514 00:32:13,867 --> 00:32:15,635 >> Jimmy: ANY BIG MOVIES YOU EVER AUDITIONED FOR THAT YOU DIDN'T GET 515 00:32:15,635 --> 00:32:17,871 >> WELL, TOM CRUISE, "COCKTAIL. WHICH, YOU SEE THAT PICTURE -- 516 00:32:17,871 --> 00:32:19,339 I DON'T KNOW HOW I COULDN'T GET IT [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] 517 00:32:19,339 --> 00:32:21,641 I AUDITIONED FOR "COCKTAIL", BUT I DID -- I WAS A BARTENDER SO I WAS LIKE, "I'M GOING TO DO 518 00:32:21,641 --> 00:32:25,345 A LITTLE STAGE BUSINESS. YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN SO, I SHOW UP AT THE AUDITION, 519 00:32:25,345 --> 00:32:28,748 I MET TOM CRUISE KIND OF -- I WAS STAR STRUCK A A LITTLE BIT 520 00:32:28,748 --> 00:32:31,084 YOU KNOW, TOM CRUISE, I DIDN'T KNOW HE WAS GOING TO BE THERE. >> Jimmy: YEAH 521 00:32:31,084 --> 00:32:32,719 >> SO, I START DOING THE THING WHERE I'M THE OTHER BARTENDER, IF YOU SAW THE MOVIE 522 00:32:32,719 --> 00:32:36,089 NOBODY DID IT WAS A HORRIBLE MOVIE. [ LAUGHTER ] 523 00:32:36,089 --> 00:32:40,994 >> Jimmy: IT WAS A GOOD MOVIE. >> IT'S ONE OF THE WORST MOVIES OF ALL TIME. 524 00:32:40,994 --> 00:32:44,497 PEOPLE WRITE ABOUT YOU, "YOU'RE TOO ENTHUSIASTIC." [ LAUGHTER ] 525 00:32:44,497 --> 00:32:46,566 >> Jimmy: THEY CAN'T SAY THAT TO ME. I LIKE THAT. 526 00:32:46,566 --> 00:32:50,704 THE HIPPY HIPPY SHAKE. >> OH, THE WORST [ LAUGHTER ] 527 00:32:50,704 --> 00:32:54,207 I AUDTIONED FOR THE BARTENDER. I DIDN'T KNOW, THE BARTENDER, THE FIX IS IN AND ALL THESE 528 00:32:54,207 --> 00:32:56,509 THINGS I GET YOU HAVE TO SHOW UP FOR THE AUDITION, BUT I SHOW UP -- 529 00:32:56,509 --> 00:33:02,182 >> Jimmy: FIX IS IN. >> FIX IS IN AND I START DOING, LIKE, 530 00:33:02,182 --> 00:33:06,453 PANTOMIME BARTENDING I USED TO BE A BARTENDER, SO - >> Jimmy: OH MY GOSH 531 00:33:06,453 --> 00:33:10,390 >> I'M LIKE THIS - >> Jimmy: IS TOM CRUISE THERE? >> YEAH. 532 00:33:10,390 --> 00:33:13,226 I SUCKED THE ENERGY OUT OF THE ROOM SO BAD. [ LAUGHTER ] 533 00:33:13,226 --> 00:33:14,894 BECAUSE I WAS ALWAYS -- I WAS A TERRIBLE ACTOR, AND I WAS ALSO DOING, LIKE, MIME, 534 00:33:14,894 --> 00:33:21,334 PRETENDING TO BARTEND. AND I WAS MAKING DRINKS. LIKE, JUST STRAINING THEM. 535 00:33:21,334 --> 00:33:23,937 >> Jimmy: GET OUT OF HERE, DUDE YOU WERE STRAINING DRINKS? 536 00:33:23,937 --> 00:33:26,239 >> OH, YEAH. YOU SHOULD'VE SEEN -- THEY COULDN'T WAIT FOR IT TO END. 537 00:33:26,239 --> 00:33:32,078 IT WAS JUST SO HORRIBLE. >> Jimmy: THAT'S SO FUNNY. >> I DID WHAT NOBODY COULD DO. 538 00:33:32,078 --> 00:33:34,781 I WIPED THE SMILE OFF TOM CRUISE'S FACE. [ LAUGHTER ] 539 00:33:34,781 --> 00:33:37,617 BECAUSE HE CAME IN - >> Jimmy: HE WAS LIKE, THIS IS NOT FUNNY. 540 00:33:37,617 --> 00:33:40,787 HE'S WASTING MY TIME >> HE'S ALL SMILING. CHARMING GUY, YOU KNOW 541 00:33:40,787 --> 00:33:44,824 HE GOES, "OKAY, THANKS, MAN. [ LAUGHTER ] NOBODY CALLS YOU "MAN" IN AN 542 00:33:44,824 --> 00:33:46,693 AUDITION IT'S USUALLY, THEY DON'T LIKE YOU. 543 00:33:46,693 --> 00:33:49,095 >> Jimmy: YEAH, YEAH YOU WERE ALMOST IN A MOVIE WITH MIKE MYERS -- OFFERED YOU 544 00:33:49,095 --> 00:33:53,233 A ROLE >> THAT WAS A FAMOUS ONE, YEAH I WAS SUPPOSED TO BE IN 545 00:33:53,233 --> 00:33:57,637 "AUSTIN POWERS." BUT HE CALLED ME UP AND LITERALLY SAID, "YOU GOT THE 546 00:33:57,637 --> 00:34:01,441 PART." AND I GO, "NO, MIKE, I DON'T WANT THE PART. 547 00:34:01,441 --> 00:34:07,047 FOR NO REASON. >> I WAS GOING TO BE SCOTT EVIL, THE SON. 548 00:34:07,047 --> 00:34:08,782 'CAUSE SAW ME ON -- HE SAW ME ON "LARRY SANDERS," AND HE WAS LIKE, "DO WHAT YOU DID WITH 549 00:34:08,782 --> 00:34:14,120 RIP TORN BE THE SON." ALL THREE OF THEM. 550 00:34:14,120 --> 00:34:16,089 >> Jimmy: YOU DON'T WANT TO BE IN THAT. YOU WOULDN'T HAVE WANTED TO DO 551 00:34:16,089 --> 00:34:19,359 THAT >> EXACTLY >> Jimmy: LOOK AT WHAT YOU'RE 552 00:34:19,359 --> 00:34:22,195 DOING NOW. >> WHY BE IN A FRANCHISE OF MOVIES 553 00:34:22,195 --> 00:34:24,397 >> Jimmy: THEN EVERYONE'S YELLING, "SCOTT EVIL," WHEN YOU CROSS THE STREET 554 00:34:24,397 --> 00:34:26,900 >> YEAH. >> Jimmy: NOW, THEY'RE LIKE, "COLIN QUINN, WHAT'S UP. 555 00:34:26,900 --> 00:34:29,869 SMALL TALK." >> "SCOTT EVIL COME OVER HERE. "YOU COME HERE." 556 00:34:29,869 --> 00:34:31,938 >> Jimmy: "NO, YOU COME HERE, BUDDY. YEAH, EXACTLY. 557 00:34:31,938 --> 00:34:34,341 I THINK YOU MADE THE RIGHT MOVE >> OH, THANKS. 558 00:34:34,341 --> 00:34:36,309 >> Jimmy: 'CAUSE I THINK THIS MAN WILL BE PROUD OF WHAT YOU'RE DOING 559 00:34:36,309 --> 00:34:41,114 [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE COLIN QUINN. "SMALL TALK" PREMIERES -- THE 560 00:34:41,114 --> 00:34:45,585 PREVIEWS START TOMORROW AT THE LUCILLE LORTEL THEATER HERE IN NEW YORK CITY. 561 00:34:45,585 --> 00:34:47,887 THE ONE AND ONLY WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK WITH A A PERFORMANCE FROM 562 00:34:47,887 --> 00:34:50,290 MADISON CUNNINGHAM STICK AROUND, EVERYBODY. [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE 563 00:34:50,290 --> 00:35:15,915 * >> Jimmy: OUR NEXT GUESTS EARNED TWO GRAMMY NOMINATIONS 564 00:35:15,915 --> 00:35:20,387 FOR BEST FOLK ALBUM AND BEST AMERICAN ROOTS PERFORMANCE PERFORMING "LIFE ACCORDING TO 565 00:35:20,387 --> 00:35:24,124 RAECHEL" FROM HER ALBUM, "REVEALER. HERE'S MADISON CUNNINGHAM. 566 00:35:24,124 --> 00:35:25,291 "REVEALER. HERE'S MADISON CUNNINGHAM. [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE 567 00:35:29,529 --> 00:35:34,401 * ONCE YOUR GIR I'M ALWAYS YOUR GIRL 568 00:35:34,401 --> 00:35:40,740 WHEN I'M HERE OR WHEN I'M THERE * * OR ON A PLANE HEADE 569 00:35:40,740 --> 00:35:47,847 SOMEWHERE YOU WERE STARING DOWN THE CARS * * HOPING IT WOULD 570 00:35:47,847 --> 00:35:56,690 BE ONE OF OURS CHILDREN AND GRANDCHILDREN * * WRITING YOU CARDS 571 00:35:56,690 --> 00:36:05,865 BUT HOW LONG WER YOU WAITING FOR ME * * TO MAKE A LEF 572 00:36:05,865 --> 00:36:24,551 DOWN YOUR STREET IT'S NOT IF DARLING * * IT'S WHEN WAS THERE 573 00:36:24,551 --> 00:36:34,527 SOMETHING LEFT UNSAI WERE YOUR EYES GREEN * * WERE THEY BLU 574 00:36:34,527 --> 00:36:46,873 WHAT WAS IT THAT I FORGOT TO ASK YOU * * BUSY HANDS I'LL SET 'EM 575 00:36:46,873 --> 00:37:05,125 DOWN TO SAY I LOVE YOU RIGHT OUT LOUD * * I'LL BET YOU'RE MAKIN 576 00:37:05,125 --> 00:37:15,068 HEAVEN LAUGH BUT IT FEEL LIKE TEARS AND MEMORIE ARE ALL WE HAVE * 577 00:37:15,068 --> 00:37:31,151 * * ONCE I KNEW I I WAS ALWAYS A KNOW IT ALL * 578 00:37:31,151 --> 00:37:38,224 * TOO BUSY TOO STRESSED OUT TO TAKE YOUR CAL YOU THOUGHT I WOULD ALWAYS * 579 00:37:38,224 --> 00:37:48,735 * FIND YOU THER SITTING IN YOUR TV CHAIR WHILE TIME IS IN A BAR * 580 00:37:48,735 --> 00:37:58,244 * HAVING A LAUGH SOMEWHER THE NURSE SAID YOU WERE WAITING FOR ME * 581 00:37:58,244 --> 00:38:15,195 * TO LET GO TO LET IT B IT'S NOT IF DARLING IT'S WHEN THERE'S ALWAYS * 582 00:38:15,195 --> 00:38:28,041 * SOMETHING LEFT UNSAID WERE YOUR EYES GREEN WERE THEY BLUE * 583 00:38:28,041 --> 00:38:40,453 * WHAT WAS IT THAT FORGOT TO ASK YO BUSY HANDS I'LL * 584 00:38:40,453 --> 00:38:56,936 * SET 'EM DOW SAY I LOVE YOU HERE NO I BET YOU'RE MAKIN 585 00:38:56,936 --> 00:39:12,585 HEAVE LAUGH BUT IT FEELS * * LIKE TEARS AND MEMEORIE ARE ALL WE HAV 586 00:39:12,585 --> 00:39:29,636 ONCE YOUR GIRL I'M ALWAYS YOUR GIRL * [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE 587 00:39:29,636 --> 00:39:31,271 >> Jimmy: OH, GOD, THAT WAS BEAUTIFUL. FANTASTIC. 588 00:39:31,271 --> 00:39:33,340 OH, MY GOSH. MADISON CUNNINGHAM [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE 589 00:39:33,340 --> 00:39:39,045 MADISON CUNNINGHAM "REVEALER" IS OUT NOW. WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK, EVERYBODY 590 00:39:39,045 --> 00:40:01,001 [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE * >> Jimmy: MY THANKS TO 591 00:40:01,001 --> 00:40:10,276 SAVANNAH GUTHRIE, HODA KOTB, COLIN QUINN, MADISON CUNNINGHAM, ONCE AGAIN 592 00:40:10,276 --> 00:40:14,581 [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE THAT WAS UNBELIEVABLE. AND THE ROOTS, RIGHT THERE, 593 00:40:14,581 --> 00:40:17,617 FROM PHILADELPHIA, PENNSYLVANIA LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, THANK YOU 594 00:40:17,617 --> 00:40:19,786 FOR WATCHING STAY TUNED FOR "LATE NIGHT WITH SETH MEYERS. 595 00:40:19,786 --> 00:40:19,786 SETH MEYERS. GOODNIGHT, EVERYBODY [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE