1
00:00:01,653 --> 00:00:04,091
Dre: Society would have us
believe that the divide
2
00:00:04,134 --> 00:00:07,050
between boys and girls is vast
and insurmountable.
3
00:00:07,094 --> 00:00:09,966
We're taught, "Girls are made
of sugar and spice
4
00:00:10,010 --> 00:00:11,446
and everything nice."
5
00:00:11,489 --> 00:00:13,709
"And boys are made
of snips and snails
6
00:00:13,752 --> 00:00:15,493
and puppy dog tails."
7
00:00:15,537 --> 00:00:18,235
But in this house,
we raise our daughters
8
00:00:18,279 --> 00:00:20,672
to be just as strong
as our sons.
9
00:00:20,716 --> 00:00:25,721
We raise our sons to be just
as sensitive as our daughters.
10
00:00:25,764 --> 00:00:28,985
And I would say we overachieved with Junior.
11
00:00:29,029 --> 00:00:33,816
But still, Bow and I try
to look past gender
12
00:00:33,859 --> 00:00:38,386
and see our kids
for the individuals they are.
13
00:00:38,429 --> 00:00:39,909
Oh!
14
00:00:39,952 --> 00:00:40,649
-Hey.
-Hey, babe.
15
00:00:40,692 --> 00:00:42,042
Look at this.
16
00:00:42,085 --> 00:00:44,740
I got twenty likes
on my new sneakers.
17
00:00:44,783 --> 00:00:46,002
You know that's not a lot,
right?
18
00:00:46,046 --> 00:00:47,177
What? What? What?
19
00:00:47,221 --> 00:00:48,613
No, Diane liked it.
Look at that.
20
00:00:48,657 --> 00:00:49,658
And she doesn't like
anything.
21
00:00:49,701 --> 00:00:51,529
Online or in real life.
22
00:00:51,573 --> 00:00:53,183
Oh, wait, wait, wait, wait,
wait, wait, wait.
23
00:00:53,227 --> 00:00:54,576
What?"Golden State Thriller"?
24
00:00:54,619 --> 00:00:56,099
Did she change
her username?
25
00:00:56,143 --> 00:00:57,579
I don't know.
She's always chang--
26
00:00:57,622 --> 00:00:58,623
What is that?
27
00:00:58,667 --> 00:00:59,798
[ Gasps ]
What is this?
28
00:00:59,842 --> 00:01:00,625
[ Gasps ]
29
00:01:00,669 --> 00:01:01,757
Scroll.
30
00:01:01,800 --> 00:01:03,454
Is this a fake account?
31
00:01:03,498 --> 00:01:04,542
Oh, m-- Oh!
32
00:01:04,586 --> 00:01:06,631
Oh, my Lord!
33
00:01:06,675 --> 00:01:07,676
Oh, God.
34
00:01:07,719 --> 00:01:10,113
Wait, Dre.
35
00:01:10,157 --> 00:01:12,202
It's worse.
Yeah.
36
00:01:12,246 --> 00:01:13,769
This is
her real account.
37
00:01:13,812 --> 00:01:15,597
She played us.
38
00:01:15,640 --> 00:01:17,686
How is she verified?
39
00:01:17,729 --> 00:01:23,170
--Captions by VITAC--
40
00:01:23,213 --> 00:01:24,606
Image reported.
Okay.
41
00:01:24,649 --> 00:01:27,261
Image reported.
42
00:01:27,304 --> 00:01:29,828
Yes, because
it directly harms me!
43
00:01:29,872 --> 00:01:31,482
You know, we should have never
got the Internet.
44
00:01:31,526 --> 00:01:32,788
Somebody
get me Zuckerberg.
45
00:01:32,831 --> 00:01:34,268
Get me Zuckerberg!
46
00:01:34,311 --> 00:01:36,357
Dre, look,I know she broke the rules,
47
00:01:36,400 --> 00:01:38,359
but we do not get
to overreact.
48
00:01:38,402 --> 00:01:40,970
The last thing we want to dois body shame our daughter.
49
00:01:41,013 --> 00:01:43,320
Appropriate amounts
of body shaming is okay.
50
00:01:43,364 --> 00:01:45,192
It's what got me to return
my male thong!
51
00:01:45,235 --> 00:01:48,543
No, Dre,the beach club management
52
00:01:48,586 --> 00:01:52,199
got you to return
your male thong.
53
00:01:52,242 --> 00:01:54,462
Listen, I know you wantto freak out,
54
00:01:54,505 --> 00:01:58,292
but this is a normal partof teenage development.
55
00:01:58,335 --> 00:02:00,990
I remember --
I remember, Dre,
56
00:02:01,033 --> 00:02:02,818
when I was a teenage girl,
57
00:02:02,861 --> 00:02:07,170
I had twodiaries.
58
00:02:07,214 --> 00:02:09,259
One for my mother to find
59
00:02:09,303 --> 00:02:12,219
and the other
where I wrote down my crushes
60
00:02:12,262 --> 00:02:13,829
and all my new swears.
61
00:02:13,872 --> 00:02:15,135
Of course
you were dirty.
62
00:02:15,178 --> 00:02:16,223
What do you mean,
dirty?
63
00:02:16,266 --> 00:02:17,354
Your parents
were terrible.
64
00:02:17,398 --> 00:02:19,748
How could this happento us?
65
00:02:19,791 --> 00:02:22,751
After football season,we are all going back to church.
66
00:02:22,794 --> 00:02:24,970
Well, we don't need
to punish everybody, Dre.
67
00:02:25,014 --> 00:02:26,581
Look,
we need to stay calm
68
00:02:26,624 --> 00:02:28,844
or she's just gonna hide
more things from us.
69
00:02:28,887 --> 00:02:30,280
So when I get home
from work,
70
00:02:30,324 --> 00:02:32,239
you and I are gonna
sit her down together
71
00:02:32,282 --> 00:02:33,979
and we're gonna talk
about what she did
72
00:02:34,023 --> 00:02:36,068
and figure out how
we're gonna move forward.
73
00:02:36,112 --> 00:02:37,592
That's the plan.
74
00:02:37,635 --> 00:02:38,419
I like it.
75
00:02:38,462 --> 00:02:39,637
Okay.
76
00:02:39,681 --> 00:02:41,422
Can I hold a belt?
77
00:02:41,465 --> 00:02:42,597
No.
78
00:02:42,640 --> 00:02:44,338
Fine.
79
00:02:44,381 --> 00:02:47,602
I'm just going to wear one
just in case.
80
00:02:47,645 --> 00:02:49,125
[ Laughter ]
81
00:02:49,169 --> 00:02:50,474
Hey, Dre.
Yeah.
82
00:02:50,518 --> 00:02:51,780
I tried to send
you my Instagram story
83
00:02:51,823 --> 00:02:53,042
of me going
to a Black barber,
84
00:02:53,085 --> 00:02:54,304
but you didn't
come up.
85
00:02:54,348 --> 00:02:56,219
Did -- Did you
accidentally block me again?
86
00:02:56,263 --> 00:02:58,265
Ah, no, Josh.
87
00:02:58,308 --> 00:03:01,746
Even though I would love
to ignore that story,
88
00:03:01,790 --> 00:03:03,487
I deleted my account
this morning.
89
00:03:03,531 --> 00:03:05,315
Oh.Well, that's probably
for the best, Dre.
90
00:03:05,359 --> 00:03:07,317
All those pictures of you
in fancy cars and diamonds
91
00:03:07,361 --> 00:03:08,927
made me want
to pay you less.
92
00:03:08,971 --> 00:03:10,494
Hm.What happened, Dre?
93
00:03:10,538 --> 00:03:12,975
Oh, did you accept a request
from a Russian model
94
00:03:13,018 --> 00:03:14,455
and now none of your computers
will turn on?
95
00:03:14,498 --> 00:03:16,413
No, I found Diane's
secret account,
96
00:03:16,457 --> 00:03:17,936
where she's posing
like a model
97
00:03:17,980 --> 00:03:19,851
and getting likes from guysold enough to vote
98
00:03:19,895 --> 00:03:20,722
but don't.
99
00:03:20,765 --> 00:03:22,724
Sweet mother of God,
Dre.
100
00:03:22,767 --> 00:03:25,074
What foreign country
are you sending her to?
101
00:03:25,117 --> 00:03:27,337
You don't want any place
west of Belarus.
102
00:03:27,381 --> 00:03:28,904
That was
my first instinct.
103
00:03:28,947 --> 00:03:31,341
But then Bow convinced methat we need to be sensitive
104
00:03:31,385 --> 00:03:34,431
with Diane so thatshe can continue to trust us!
105
00:03:34,475 --> 00:03:36,433
That is such nonsense.
106
00:03:36,477 --> 00:03:38,522
Young girls
don't need trust.
107
00:03:38,566 --> 00:03:41,003
They need to think
that behind every door
108
00:03:41,046 --> 00:03:43,875
is a man waiting
to besmirch them physically.
109
00:03:43,919 --> 00:03:45,616
What?
Exactly right.
110
00:03:45,660 --> 00:03:48,880
Diane needs to know that
all teenage boys are wolves.
111
00:03:48,924 --> 00:03:50,578
And she is
a little lamb.
112
00:03:50,621 --> 00:03:52,319
That's right, Dre.
Men are just angling
113
00:03:52,362 --> 00:03:53,711
at ways
to get at your daughter,
114
00:03:53,755 --> 00:03:54,843
and once they do...
115
00:03:54,886 --> 00:03:56,323
[ Chuckles ]
116
00:03:56,366 --> 00:03:57,802
...she belongs
to the night.
117
00:03:57,846 --> 00:03:59,064
She broke the rules.
118
00:03:59,108 --> 00:04:01,023
She's not
some helpless creature, man.
119
00:04:01,066 --> 00:04:03,373
Diane can handle herself.
We raised her right.
120
00:04:03,417 --> 00:04:05,941
But did everyone else's parents
raise them right?
121
00:04:05,984 --> 00:04:07,029
Hmm.
[ Chuckles ]
122
00:04:07,072 --> 00:04:08,944
I know I didn't.
123
00:04:08,987 --> 00:04:12,817
Look, Dre,
here's the thing.
124
00:04:12,861 --> 00:04:15,472
If my teenage daughter
were to get pregnant,
125
00:04:15,516 --> 00:04:17,300
maybe it would lower
my chance
126
00:04:17,344 --> 00:04:18,997
of winning
"father of the year" award,
127
00:04:19,041 --> 00:04:21,696
but if your teenage daughter
gets pregnant,
128
00:04:21,739 --> 00:04:24,873
well, then you and she
are just a stereotype.
129
00:04:24,916 --> 00:04:26,222
[ Chuckles ]
130
00:04:26,266 --> 00:04:28,485
Isn't the world funny?
131
00:04:28,529 --> 00:04:30,792
Hey, who's thinking
hot sandwiches?
132
00:04:30,835 --> 00:04:32,097
I am starving.
133
00:04:32,141 --> 00:04:32,968
-I do!
-Come on, let's get it.
134
00:04:33,011 --> 00:04:34,883
-Let's do it!
-Oh, yeah!
135
00:04:34,926 --> 00:04:36,319
♪
136
00:04:36,363 --> 00:04:37,842
Hey, Grandma.
Yeah, babe?
137
00:04:37,886 --> 00:04:39,104
Can I talk to you?
138
00:04:39,148 --> 00:04:40,323
It's about
me and Olivia.
139
00:04:40,367 --> 00:04:43,761
Ah, you need
relationship advice,
140
00:04:43,805 --> 00:04:46,242
so you came to the only person
you could trust.
141
00:04:46,286 --> 00:04:48,200
Yeah.
Also, nobody else is home.
142
00:04:48,244 --> 00:04:49,593
Sit down, baby.
143
00:04:49,637 --> 00:04:52,466
So, Olivia and I
have been doing
144
00:04:52,509 --> 00:04:54,424
this "around-the-world"
food tour.
145
00:04:54,468 --> 00:04:56,426
Mm-hmm.And she loves it so much,
146
00:04:56,470 --> 00:04:58,689
but it has been killing
my stomach.
147
00:04:58,733 --> 00:04:59,995
Mm-hmm.I don't know what to do.
148
00:05:00,038 --> 00:05:01,301
I really like her.
149
00:05:01,344 --> 00:05:04,652
How do I tell her
I hate something she loves?
150
00:05:04,695 --> 00:05:06,567
Well,
that's an easy one, baby.
151
00:05:06,610 --> 00:05:09,091
You don't.
What?
152
00:05:09,134 --> 00:05:13,791
Secrets are the foundation
of all good relationships.
153
00:05:13,835 --> 00:05:15,880
Hmm.
Couples need
a little mystery.
154
00:05:15,924 --> 00:05:18,883
You think Barack goes to the
bathroom in front of Michelle?
155
00:05:18,927 --> 00:05:20,145
Hell no.
156
00:05:20,189 --> 00:05:21,669
They have boundaries.
157
00:05:21,712 --> 00:05:24,759
But I'm lying to her.
Isn't that wrong?
158
00:05:24,802 --> 00:05:27,762
Is the lie making you
a better boyfriend?
159
00:05:27,805 --> 00:05:28,545
Maybe?
160
00:05:28,589 --> 00:05:30,721
Then it's not wrong.
161
00:05:30,765 --> 00:05:34,159
Listen, I lie to
your grandfather all the time,
162
00:05:34,203 --> 00:05:36,684
and our relationship
has been going strong
163
00:05:36,727 --> 00:05:39,208
for fifty years.
164
00:05:39,251 --> 00:05:40,644
Didn't you blow up
his boat?
165
00:05:40,688 --> 00:05:44,213
And some day, God willing,
she'll blow up your boat.
166
00:05:44,256 --> 00:05:45,606
Oh.
The point is,
167
00:05:45,649 --> 00:05:48,043
is what she don't know
won't hurt her.
168
00:05:48,086 --> 00:05:49,697
You understand?
Yeah.
169
00:05:49,740 --> 00:05:51,133
Get the hell on
where you're going.
170
00:05:51,176 --> 00:05:52,961
Thanks, Grandma.You're welcome.
171
00:05:53,004 --> 00:05:55,093
[ Laughs ]
172
00:05:55,137 --> 00:05:57,705
Mm.
173
00:05:57,748 --> 00:06:01,361
No wonder the baby
has allergies. [ Scoffs ]
174
00:06:01,404 --> 00:06:03,188
The guys at work
tried to scare me,
175
00:06:03,232 --> 00:06:06,061
but I knew Diane had
a good head on her shoulders.
176
00:06:06,104 --> 00:06:07,323
Hey, Dad.
177
00:06:07,367 --> 00:06:09,369
Hey, new sweatshirt?
178
00:06:09,412 --> 00:06:10,848
Oh, it's not mine.
179
00:06:10,892 --> 00:06:13,982
I got cold during Spanish,
so Jason gave this to me.
180
00:06:14,025 --> 00:06:15,636
Jason?
181
00:06:15,679 --> 00:06:17,420
Jason, who fills out
that sweatshirt?
182
00:06:17,464 --> 00:06:19,030
I mean, it's actually
kind of tight on him.
183
00:06:19,074 --> 00:06:20,771
He really bulked up
over the summer.
184
00:06:20,815 --> 00:06:22,991
He took his shirt off
during football practice,
185
00:06:23,034 --> 00:06:25,428
and I heard the coach gasp.
186
00:06:25,472 --> 00:06:27,038
Hey, son, uh,
187
00:06:27,082 --> 00:06:29,432
can you give me and Diane
a minute, please?
188
00:06:29,476 --> 00:06:30,694
Sure, but if you want
to hear more
189
00:06:30,738 --> 00:06:33,088
about how truly large
Jason is,
190
00:06:33,131 --> 00:06:34,742
you know where to find me.
191
00:06:34,785 --> 00:06:37,135
Uh, baby girl.
Mm-hmm?
192
00:06:37,179 --> 00:06:39,355
Uh, you're gonna have
to give that sweatshirt back.
193
00:06:39,399 --> 00:06:41,139
But he said I can keep it
as long as I want to.
194
00:06:41,183 --> 00:06:43,359
Yeah,
that's what all boys say.
195
00:06:43,403 --> 00:06:45,056
Take it off.
196
00:06:45,100 --> 00:06:45,970
Okay, fine.
197
00:06:48,756 --> 00:06:50,453
Uh-huh. Yeah.
198
00:06:50,497 --> 00:06:51,541
Thank you.
199
00:06:51,585 --> 00:06:53,717
Yeah.
Hey!
200
00:06:53,761 --> 00:06:55,327
Did you wear that
to school?
201
00:06:55,371 --> 00:06:57,068
Yeah,
I thought it was cute.
202
00:06:57,112 --> 00:06:59,767
I knew I should wait for Bow
to handle things, but...
203
00:06:59,810 --> 00:07:01,769
[ Wolf howls]
204
00:07:01,812 --> 00:07:03,814
We need to talk
right now.
205
00:07:03,858 --> 00:07:06,426
This boy is trying
to take advantage of you,
206
00:07:06,469 --> 00:07:09,603
and I'm the only one that's
preventing him from doing so.
207
00:07:09,646 --> 00:07:13,128
Sweet Black Jesus,
how ripped is he?
208
00:07:13,171 --> 00:07:15,739
Is he a high school student
or a government experiment?
209
00:07:19,439 --> 00:07:21,266
Hey, babe.
210
00:07:21,310 --> 00:07:22,137
How was your day?
211
00:07:22,180 --> 00:07:23,573
Oh, my day was great.
212
00:07:23,617 --> 00:07:25,357
Let me tell you something.
I had no surgery today,
213
00:07:25,401 --> 00:07:29,274
and I finally mastered
the firefly pose in yoga.
214
00:07:29,318 --> 00:07:31,625
Suck it,
Six-Pack Stacy.
215
00:07:31,668 --> 00:07:34,149
There is a new favorite
in class.
216
00:07:34,192 --> 00:07:36,760
Hey.
Okay. Well, I'm glad
somebody had a good day
217
00:07:36,804 --> 00:07:40,460
because I had to come home
and put out a fire with Diane.
218
00:07:40,503 --> 00:07:41,983
Oh, no.
Wait. What happened now?
219
00:07:42,026 --> 00:07:44,028
She let a boy give her
a sweatshirt.
220
00:07:44,072 --> 00:07:45,160
Okay.
221
00:07:45,203 --> 00:07:46,466
Don't worry.
222
00:07:46,509 --> 00:07:49,512
I handled it.
How?
223
00:07:49,556 --> 00:07:51,514
You pose like that online,
224
00:07:51,558 --> 00:07:54,343
your cuteness brings the boys
to the yard!
225
00:07:54,386 --> 00:07:55,997
A boy will think
that you owe him
226
00:07:56,040 --> 00:07:57,868
for every little thing
that he gives you.
227
00:07:57,912 --> 00:07:59,522
A breath mint could be
the only thing
228
00:07:59,566 --> 00:08:01,655
between you
and maternity pants!
229
00:08:01,698 --> 00:08:03,352
Jason -- He gave you
his sweatshirt, uh-huh,
230
00:08:03,395 --> 00:08:04,571
but I guarantee you this!
231
00:08:04,614 --> 00:08:06,050
He will be nowhere to be found
232
00:08:06,094 --> 00:08:08,357
when you're eight months
pregnant with hemorrhoids
233
00:08:08,400 --> 00:08:10,141
and ankles
the size of softballs!
234
00:08:11,578 --> 00:08:12,492
Oh, you thought I was done?!
235
00:08:12,535 --> 00:08:13,797
I'm not done!
236
00:08:13,841 --> 00:08:16,757
What are you,
a youth pastor in Alabama?
237
00:08:16,800 --> 00:08:18,976
Dre, there is a reason
238
00:08:19,020 --> 00:08:20,935
that we talk about these things
together.
239
00:08:20,978 --> 00:08:22,719
It was an emergency.
240
00:08:22,763 --> 00:08:23,938
And you should be
thanking me.
241
00:08:23,981 --> 00:08:27,245
Dre, you just blew up
all of the open lines
242
00:08:27,289 --> 00:08:28,638
of communication
243
00:08:28,682 --> 00:08:32,816
that we worked so hard to build
with Diane.
244
00:08:32,860 --> 00:08:34,035
We need to talk
to her.
245
00:08:34,078 --> 00:08:36,211
Teenagers think
they're grown today,
246
00:08:36,254 --> 00:08:37,952
and they're not.
247
00:08:37,995 --> 00:08:41,738
Alright, my mother came down
hard on me, and it worked.
248
00:08:41,782 --> 00:08:43,174
You're terrified
of your mother.
249
00:08:43,218 --> 00:08:45,394
All Black men are terrified
of their mothers, Bow.
250
00:08:45,437 --> 00:08:47,570
That's how love works.
251
00:08:47,614 --> 00:08:50,355
While I was keeping the heat
on Diane,
252
00:08:50,399 --> 00:08:53,750
Olivia was keeping a different
kind of heat on Junior.
253
00:08:53,794 --> 00:08:57,406
And we've reached
our next culinary destination:
254
00:08:57,449 --> 00:08:59,364
Malaysia!
[ Chuckles ]
255
00:08:59,408 --> 00:09:03,325
I -- I love curry,
and I love fish heads.
256
00:09:03,368 --> 00:09:04,587
Put them together,
look out!
257
00:09:04,631 --> 00:09:05,980
[ Both laugh ]
258
00:09:06,023 --> 00:09:08,199
Oh, the recipe called
for seven different chilies.
259
00:09:08,243 --> 00:09:09,723
I had to go to three
different grocery stores
260
00:09:09,766 --> 00:09:11,333
just to get
all the ingredients.
261
00:09:11,376 --> 00:09:12,943
You didn't have
to do that.
262
00:09:12,987 --> 00:09:14,684
Anything for you, babe.
263
00:09:14,728 --> 00:09:16,338
[ Chuckles softly ]
Dig in.
264
00:09:16,381 --> 00:09:20,995
♪
265
00:09:21,038 --> 00:09:22,344
Is everything okay?
266
00:09:22,387 --> 00:09:25,260
Yeah, yeah. No, no, no,
just savoring the aromas.
267
00:09:25,303 --> 00:09:26,827
Mmm!
268
00:09:26,870 --> 00:09:27,654
Delicious.
269
00:09:27,697 --> 00:09:29,046
[ Both chuckle ]
270
00:09:29,090 --> 00:09:33,877
♪
271
00:09:33,921 --> 00:09:35,226
Mmm.
272
00:09:35,270 --> 00:09:36,663
[ Chuckles ]
273
00:09:36,706 --> 00:09:40,014
[ Slurps ]
274
00:09:40,057 --> 00:09:41,668
Mmm! [ Chuckles ]
275
00:09:41,711 --> 00:09:44,540
Ooh!
You just feel the -- the spices.
276
00:09:44,584 --> 00:09:45,628
Just goes right down
your throat.
277
00:09:45,672 --> 00:09:46,890
I know.
278
00:09:46,934 --> 00:09:48,283
Just like fire.
279
00:09:48,326 --> 00:09:51,068
So I sent my building manager
an e-mail
280
00:09:51,112 --> 00:09:53,897
asking if we can change
these blinds to curtains,
281
00:09:53,941 --> 00:09:55,551
and guess what.
282
00:09:55,595 --> 00:09:58,075
He said he wants all the windows
to be uniform,
283
00:09:58,119 --> 00:10:00,861
and I'm like,
"We face an alley.
284
00:10:00,904 --> 00:10:03,341
Nobody's gonna see
the blinds.
285
00:10:03,385 --> 00:10:04,647
Nobody's gonna see
the --"
286
00:10:04,691 --> 00:10:06,867
My mouth is on fire!
287
00:10:06,910 --> 00:10:09,130
What?
288
00:10:09,173 --> 00:10:10,174
Oh, my God.
289
00:10:10,218 --> 00:10:11,480
Are you okay?
290
00:10:11,523 --> 00:10:13,438
Junior, are you okay?
291
00:10:13,482 --> 00:10:14,657
Seriously?
292
00:10:14,701 --> 00:10:15,919
No!
293
00:10:15,963 --> 00:10:16,964
I'm not okay.
294
00:10:17,007 --> 00:10:18,835
It hurts so bad.
295
00:10:18,879 --> 00:10:20,620
So, so bad.
296
00:10:20,663 --> 00:10:22,752
All of this spicy food
is killing me.
297
00:10:22,796 --> 00:10:24,885
My stomach feels like a --
like a --
298
00:10:24,928 --> 00:10:28,018
like a wet paper bag
just full of hot coals.
299
00:10:28,062 --> 00:10:29,324
Well, then why have you been
letting me cook you
300
00:10:29,367 --> 00:10:30,804
all this spicy food?
301
00:10:30,847 --> 00:10:33,633
Because you like spicy food
so much.
302
00:10:33,676 --> 00:10:37,637
And...I like you so much.
303
00:10:43,251 --> 00:10:46,733
You know we don't have to agree
on everything to date, right?
304
00:10:46,776 --> 00:10:47,734
Of course
I don't know that.
305
00:10:47,777 --> 00:10:49,039
Everything that I know
about dating
306
00:10:49,083 --> 00:10:50,345
I've learned
from watching my parents
307
00:10:50,388 --> 00:10:52,042
and "Think Like a Man"
movies.
308
00:10:52,086 --> 00:10:53,696
Okay.
309
00:10:53,740 --> 00:10:55,393
If we're going to work,
310
00:10:55,437 --> 00:10:57,918
you need to just be honest
with me.
311
00:10:57,961 --> 00:11:01,922
I'm still going to like you
for who you are, okay?
312
00:11:01,965 --> 00:11:03,750
Okay.
313
00:11:03,793 --> 00:11:06,056
Unless you're
into Frisbee golf.
314
00:11:06,100 --> 00:11:07,710
I mean, it's just a waste
of park resources.
315
00:11:07,754 --> 00:11:11,627
♪
316
00:11:11,671 --> 00:11:13,281
[ Knock on door ]
317
00:11:13,324 --> 00:11:15,196
Honey?
318
00:11:15,239 --> 00:11:18,460
Hi. We brought
your sweatshirt back.
Hi.
319
00:11:18,503 --> 00:11:21,158
So, we want you to know
320
00:11:21,202 --> 00:11:23,987
that you are in control
of your own body
321
00:11:24,031 --> 00:11:25,989
and you can do
whatever you want with it.
322
00:11:26,033 --> 00:11:28,775
But the pictures
that you're posting,
323
00:11:28,818 --> 00:11:30,864
they give people a window
324
00:11:30,907 --> 00:11:34,868
into something
that you should keep private.
325
00:11:34,911 --> 00:11:36,043
Dre: Boys thumb
through Instagram
326
00:11:36,086 --> 00:11:37,697
like it's
a Cheesecake Machine menu,
327
00:11:37,740 --> 00:11:39,568
and you are dressed
like a Jalapeño Popper.
328
00:11:39,611 --> 00:11:42,310
And you can dress like a
Jalapeño Popper if you want to.
329
00:11:42,353 --> 00:11:46,270
Because it is your right
as a woman.
330
00:11:46,314 --> 00:11:49,447
Okay, so I have the right to do
what I did,
331
00:11:49,491 --> 00:11:50,361
but I shouldn't have
done it?
332
00:11:50,405 --> 00:11:51,711
Okay, I got it.
333
00:11:51,754 --> 00:11:55,062
Listen. [ Clears throat ]
334
00:11:55,105 --> 00:11:58,630
You are building your identity
as a woman.
335
00:11:58,674 --> 00:12:01,590
And you should have the freedom
to explore that
336
00:12:01,633 --> 00:12:05,159
without being tied
to the judgments of society.
337
00:12:05,202 --> 00:12:07,988
[ Sighs ]And society
will judge you.
338
00:12:08,031 --> 00:12:10,904
But I want you
to remember that
339
00:12:10,947 --> 00:12:13,558
while you are ignoring
the judgment.
340
00:12:13,602 --> 00:12:14,646
Does that make sense?
341
00:12:14,690 --> 00:12:16,257
I guess.
No.
342
00:12:16,300 --> 00:12:17,998
Okay,
so we've handled that.
343
00:12:18,041 --> 00:12:19,260
What?
Yeah.
Yes.
344
00:12:19,303 --> 00:12:20,391
Alright.
345
00:12:20,435 --> 00:12:21,436
There we go.
346
00:12:21,479 --> 00:12:22,959
Okay, okay, okay.
347
00:12:23,003 --> 00:12:24,526
I'll leave it alone,
but you know what?
348
00:12:24,569 --> 00:12:25,832
When your mama go to work,
349
00:12:25,875 --> 00:12:27,268
I'm taking the door
off the hinges.
350
00:12:27,311 --> 00:12:31,185
♪
351
00:12:31,228 --> 00:12:32,926
[ Sighs ]Oh, good, you're here.
352
00:12:32,969 --> 00:12:34,231
What year
did America open?
353
00:12:34,275 --> 00:12:35,667
1776.
354
00:12:35,711 --> 00:12:38,018
Right, I knew it was definitely
before I was born.
355
00:12:38,061 --> 00:12:40,977
I just couldn't remember
how far.
356
00:12:41,021 --> 00:12:42,936
You seem
angrier than usual.
357
00:12:42,979 --> 00:12:45,155
Mom and Dad cornered me
about that sweatshirt.
358
00:12:45,199 --> 00:12:47,027
You'd think after Dad yelled
at me for like an hour,
359
00:12:47,070 --> 00:12:48,463
we'd be done, but no.
360
00:12:48,506 --> 00:12:50,726
Here comes Mom, to yell at me
in her "quiet" way.
361
00:12:50,770 --> 00:12:52,989
She can say "sweetie"
as many times as she wants.
362
00:12:53,033 --> 00:12:54,208
We're still
being yelled at.
363
00:12:54,251 --> 00:12:56,514
[ Scoffs ]
Are you just as tired as I am
364
00:12:56,558 --> 00:12:58,255
of Mom and Dad
cracking down on us?
365
00:12:58,299 --> 00:13:01,258
Yes, Dad forced me to add him
to my close friends list
366
00:13:01,302 --> 00:13:02,912
on all of my accounts
because he says he wants
367
00:13:02,956 --> 00:13:04,261
to keep an eye
on things.
368
00:13:04,305 --> 00:13:06,046
But all he ever does
is put fire emojis
369
00:13:06,089 --> 00:13:07,830
underneath
everything I post.
370
00:13:07,874 --> 00:13:09,353
It's weird for your dad
to say
371
00:13:09,397 --> 00:13:11,573
that your shirtless
basketball picture is fire.
372
00:13:11,616 --> 00:13:14,663
So you were half naked
and Dad said nothing?
373
00:13:14,706 --> 00:13:15,838
And Mom liked it?
374
00:13:15,882 --> 00:13:17,405
This is ridiculous.
375
00:13:17,448 --> 00:13:19,146
I can't post a photo of me
wearing lipstick,
376
00:13:19,189 --> 00:13:20,800
but you can flaunt
your bird chest
377
00:13:20,843 --> 00:13:21,931
all over the Internet?
378
00:13:21,975 --> 00:13:23,411
Unh-unh. Nope.
Let's go.
379
00:13:23,454 --> 00:13:24,455
We've all got
to have a talk.
380
00:13:24,499 --> 00:13:26,066
Come on.
What?
381
00:13:26,109 --> 00:13:27,937
Like an eagle
or like a sparrow?
382
00:13:27,981 --> 00:13:29,330
What kind of bird
are we talking?
383
00:13:30,113 --> 00:13:31,985
Mm-hmm. Hey.
Good, you're here.
384
00:13:32,028 --> 00:13:33,464
Hey, Diane,
set the table.
385
00:13:33,508 --> 00:13:34,683
Do you think it's fair
you're treating me differently
386
00:13:34,726 --> 00:13:36,337
because I'm a girl?
387
00:13:36,380 --> 00:13:37,729
Okay. Fine.
388
00:13:37,773 --> 00:13:39,993
Uh, Jack, set the table.
389
00:13:40,036 --> 00:13:43,257
Diane, we do not
treat you differently.
390
00:13:43,300 --> 00:13:44,562
You don't?
No.
391
00:13:44,606 --> 00:13:46,260
You've seen Jack online.
392
00:13:46,303 --> 00:13:48,001
He's shirtless
and sweaty.
393
00:13:48,044 --> 00:13:49,219
And how many lectures
did he get?
394
00:13:49,263 --> 00:13:51,134
Because
I've gotten two so far.
395
00:13:51,178 --> 00:13:53,441
That was a picture
of Jack playing sports.
396
00:13:53,484 --> 00:13:54,877
Nobody is paying attention
to that.
397
00:13:54,921 --> 00:13:56,618
Really?Yeah.
398
00:13:56,661 --> 00:13:58,881
Because I bet Ashley Thompson
saw it and liked it, too,
399
00:13:58,925 --> 00:14:00,970
which is probably
why they've been making out
400
00:14:01,014 --> 00:14:02,319
in the school stairwell.
401
00:14:02,363 --> 00:14:03,581
Whoa!
402
00:14:03,625 --> 00:14:06,976
This is not how I wanted it
to come out,
403
00:14:07,020 --> 00:14:07,890
but it is true.
404
00:14:07,934 --> 00:14:09,109
Ooh!
My boy!
405
00:14:09,152 --> 00:14:10,893
But you don't know that
406
00:14:10,937 --> 00:14:12,242
because you're not
in his business.
407
00:14:12,286 --> 00:14:14,114
We don't have to worry
about Jack as much
408
00:14:14,157 --> 00:14:16,768
because he can't
get pregnant.
409
00:14:16,812 --> 00:14:18,727
But he can get someone
pregnant!
410
00:14:18,770 --> 00:14:20,598
You've always said
you treat us the same,
411
00:14:20,642 --> 00:14:21,991
but you don't.
412
00:14:24,298 --> 00:14:26,691
Hey, just to be clear,
I'm really supporting
413
00:14:26,735 --> 00:14:27,910
this whole
"boys will be boys" thing
414
00:14:27,954 --> 00:14:28,911
that we've got going on,
you know?
415
00:14:28,955 --> 00:14:31,000
No. Not now.
416
00:14:34,438 --> 00:14:36,963
Obviously we are going
to talk about Diane,
417
00:14:37,006 --> 00:14:39,966
but first we need to make sure
that Jack doesn't get in
418
00:14:40,009 --> 00:14:41,924
over his head with that little
Fast Ashley.
419
00:14:41,968 --> 00:14:43,230
Definitely.
Mm-hmm.
420
00:14:43,273 --> 00:14:44,796
Any girl who's willing
to make out with Jack
421
00:14:44,840 --> 00:14:46,668
in the stairwell
doesn't respect herself
422
00:14:46,711 --> 00:14:47,843
or the stairwell.
423
00:14:47,887 --> 00:14:49,323
Oh, my God!
424
00:14:49,366 --> 00:14:51,281
Dre,
we just did it again.
425
00:14:51,325 --> 00:14:53,457
We're coming down harder
on Ashley than Jack.
426
00:14:53,501 --> 00:14:55,459
You know what?
Maybe Ashley's father
427
00:14:55,503 --> 00:14:57,679
is having the same talk
with her.
428
00:14:57,722 --> 00:14:59,420
But he's probably
not around
429
00:14:59,463 --> 00:15:02,423
because his daughter was
kissing a guy in a stairwell.
430
00:15:02,466 --> 00:15:03,467
Dre.
431
00:15:03,511 --> 00:15:04,686
Look.
432
00:15:04,729 --> 00:15:06,427
I know
I sound like a caveman.
433
00:15:06,470 --> 00:15:10,083
Yeah.
But it is my job
to protect Diane.
434
00:15:10,126 --> 00:15:11,649
And I'm not going
to apologize
435
00:15:11,693 --> 00:15:14,652
for treating our son
and daughter differently.
436
00:15:14,696 --> 00:15:16,437
Even if we treat them
the same,
437
00:15:16,480 --> 00:15:18,265
the world is gonna treat them
differently.
438
00:15:18,308 --> 00:15:20,397
I remember
when I was in high school,
439
00:15:20,441 --> 00:15:22,138
if you were a girl
and you had sex,
440
00:15:22,182 --> 00:15:23,400
you were
automatically outcast.
441
00:15:23,444 --> 00:15:25,141
If you were a guy,
you were king.
442
00:15:25,185 --> 00:15:27,187
Yeah, but back then
if you wanted to brag,
443
00:15:27,230 --> 00:15:29,363
you had to tell your friends
one by one
444
00:15:29,406 --> 00:15:31,626
or meet behind
T-Will's house
445
00:15:31,669 --> 00:15:33,323
while his grandmother
was grocery shopping.
446
00:15:33,367 --> 00:15:35,673
Eww.But now all you have to do
is post
447
00:15:35,717 --> 00:15:37,719
and the entire school sees it
in minutes.
448
00:15:37,762 --> 00:15:38,938
I know.
449
00:15:38,981 --> 00:15:41,244
I believe that women
should be able
450
00:15:41,288 --> 00:15:43,246
to freely express
their sexuality,
451
00:15:43,290 --> 00:15:45,292
but I know
that it gets exploited.
452
00:15:45,335 --> 00:15:47,990
None of thiswould be
a problem
453
00:15:48,034 --> 00:15:49,992
if there weren't men
in the world.
454
00:15:50,036 --> 00:15:51,994
Hey!
Yep.
455
00:15:52,038 --> 00:15:53,256
Okay,
I mean, you're right,
456
00:15:53,300 --> 00:15:54,692
but I just had
to say something.
457
00:15:54,736 --> 00:15:55,867
It's an unfair world.
458
00:15:55,911 --> 00:15:57,565
Diane is fifteen years old.
459
00:15:57,608 --> 00:15:59,567
I don't want to dump all of this
on her shoulders.
460
00:15:59,610 --> 00:16:02,831
But we need to prepare her
for the world as it is,
461
00:16:02,874 --> 00:16:04,485
not the way
we want it to be.
462
00:16:04,528 --> 00:16:07,444
I know it's hard
being the mother of a daughter
463
00:16:07,488 --> 00:16:10,012
in a patriarchal world.
464
00:16:10,056 --> 00:16:13,015
Yes,
I know some stuff.
465
00:16:13,059 --> 00:16:14,756
Well,
it could be worse.
466
00:16:14,799 --> 00:16:17,063
I could be Ashley's mom.
467
00:16:17,106 --> 00:16:18,325
Damn it.
468
00:16:18,368 --> 00:16:19,587
I just did it again.
469
00:16:19,630 --> 00:16:23,678
♪
470
00:16:23,721 --> 00:16:26,115
Ah,
the Prince of Lies.
471
00:16:26,159 --> 00:16:28,030
[ Laughs ]
How'd it go, babe?
472
00:16:28,074 --> 00:16:31,120
I told Olivia the truth
about how her spicy food
473
00:16:31,164 --> 00:16:33,514
rushes through me
like a hot mountain spring.
474
00:16:33,557 --> 00:16:35,429
Oh, sweetie,
475
00:16:35,472 --> 00:16:38,562
I'm so sorry
to hear about you and Olivia.
476
00:16:38,606 --> 00:16:41,652
No, Grandma, when someone
really cares about you,
477
00:16:41,696 --> 00:16:45,047
you can tell them who you are
and they'll still be there.
478
00:16:45,091 --> 00:16:47,658
Oh, so I'm just supposed
to tell the love of my life
479
00:16:47,702 --> 00:16:50,661
that "our" song --
the one we got married to --
480
00:16:50,705 --> 00:16:53,751
is the same one I had
with my last boyfriend
481
00:16:53,795 --> 00:16:55,144
and the boyfriend
before that
482
00:16:55,188 --> 00:16:56,885
and the boyfriend before that
483
00:16:56,928 --> 00:16:58,626
and the boyfriend
before that?
484
00:16:58,669 --> 00:17:00,845
"Let's Stay Together" was
your song with all those guys?
485
00:17:00,889 --> 00:17:04,458
You find a good one,
you stick with it.
486
00:17:04,501 --> 00:17:08,114
I don't want to take the chance
of hurting your grandfather.
487
00:17:08,157 --> 00:17:09,202
Trust me, Grandma.
488
00:17:09,245 --> 00:17:10,203
You're going to feel
a lot better
489
00:17:10,246 --> 00:17:12,422
if you tell him the truth.
490
00:17:12,466 --> 00:17:15,338
Okay, baby.
491
00:17:15,382 --> 00:17:16,818
So now that
you're smelling yourself,
492
00:17:16,861 --> 00:17:18,646
you think you can come out here
and talk to me
493
00:17:18,689 --> 00:17:21,388
like you're the second coming
of Black Jesus?
494
00:17:21,431 --> 00:17:23,129
I put diapers on you,
boy.
495
00:17:23,172 --> 00:17:23,694
Go on,
get out of here.
496
00:17:23,738 --> 00:17:24,782
Alright.
497
00:17:24,826 --> 00:17:27,872
♪
498
00:17:27,916 --> 00:17:30,092
Long, lanky ass.
499
00:17:30,136 --> 00:17:32,834
No matter how many years
we've been doing it,
500
00:17:32,877 --> 00:17:36,664
we keep finding there's more
and more to being parents.
501
00:17:36,707 --> 00:17:39,014
Uh, you ordered pizza?
502
00:17:39,058 --> 00:17:40,233
Well,
you failed as parents,
503
00:17:40,276 --> 00:17:41,669
so we thought
we'd treat ourselves.
504
00:17:41,712 --> 00:17:43,192
Mm-hmm.Dre: Huh, that's fair.
505
00:17:43,236 --> 00:17:46,978
Ah, as you know, this wasn't
our finest day as parents.
506
00:17:47,022 --> 00:17:48,284
And that's saying a lot
507
00:17:48,328 --> 00:17:50,112
because you once
left us on a ski lift.
508
00:17:50,156 --> 00:17:52,201
Okay, and I know you guys
are twins
509
00:17:52,245 --> 00:17:54,247
and are used
to being treated the same.
510
00:17:54,290 --> 00:17:56,336
Mm-hmm.
But there are
gonna be times
511
00:17:56,379 --> 00:17:57,815
where we're gonna talk to you
differently
512
00:17:57,859 --> 00:17:58,947
because
you're getting older
513
00:17:58,990 --> 00:18:00,296
and going through
different things.
514
00:18:00,340 --> 00:18:03,734
Yes, and, Diane,
it is so much harder on women,
515
00:18:03,778 --> 00:18:04,996
especially
on the Internet.
516
00:18:05,040 --> 00:18:06,302
Yeah, way hard.
Mm-hmm.
517
00:18:06,346 --> 00:18:08,348
So I advise you not to read
any comments
518
00:18:08,391 --> 00:18:11,133
on any of those apps
or websites ever.
519
00:18:11,177 --> 00:18:13,527
And we promise
that you will both get
520
00:18:13,570 --> 00:18:16,138
the same support
521
00:18:16,182 --> 00:18:18,314
and the same honest information
from us.
522
00:18:18,358 --> 00:18:19,663
Yeah.
Okay?
523
00:18:19,707 --> 00:18:21,404
Thanks.
Okay.
524
00:18:21,448 --> 00:18:23,058
And when it can be
the same,
525
00:18:23,102 --> 00:18:24,146
it will be the same.
526
00:18:24,190 --> 00:18:25,365
Mm-hmm.
Alright?
527
00:18:25,408 --> 00:18:27,758
For instance,
you're both grounded!
528
00:18:27,802 --> 00:18:29,108
[ Both laugh ]
529
00:18:29,151 --> 00:18:30,805
What?I don't understand.
What do you mean?
530
00:18:30,848 --> 00:18:33,112
Did you think
that we forgot
531
00:18:33,155 --> 00:18:35,984
that you lied to us
about a fake account?
532
00:18:36,027 --> 00:18:40,162
No, you, young lady, cannot
leave this house for two weeks!
533
00:18:40,206 --> 00:18:41,903
For w-- No!
What?
534
00:18:41,946 --> 00:18:44,732
And you, my son,
what are you doing
535
00:18:44,775 --> 00:18:46,560
tramping around
the school campus
536
00:18:46,603 --> 00:18:48,344
like some trollop?
Yeah.
537
00:18:48,388 --> 00:18:49,737
What are you trying to do,
get a reputation?
538
00:18:49,780 --> 00:18:52,609
[ Scoffs ] Youget two weeks as well!
539
00:18:52,653 --> 00:18:53,349
[ Both laugh ]
540
00:18:53,393 --> 00:18:55,569
What?!
541
00:18:55,612 --> 00:18:56,526
Bam!
542
00:18:56,570 --> 00:18:58,528
Sometimes you get it wrong,
543
00:18:58,572 --> 00:19:02,184
but, man,
parenting feels so good
544
00:19:02,228 --> 00:19:03,098
when you get it right.
545
00:19:06,275 --> 00:19:09,278
[ Al Green's
"Let's Stay Together" plays ]
546
00:19:09,322 --> 00:19:11,933
♪ Let's stay together
547
00:19:11,976 --> 00:19:13,717
Junior,
what are you up to?
548
00:19:13,761 --> 00:19:14,762
What?
549
00:19:14,805 --> 00:19:15,806
It's just
your favorite song.
550
00:19:15,850 --> 00:19:17,112
Yeah.
551
00:19:17,156 --> 00:19:19,201
Sung by your favorite man.
552
00:19:19,245 --> 00:19:21,377
♪ I'm so in love with you
553
00:19:21,421 --> 00:19:23,423
[ Laughs ]
554
00:19:23,466 --> 00:19:26,426
♪ Whatever you want to do
555
00:19:26,469 --> 00:19:28,384
Sing, baby.
556
00:19:28,428 --> 00:19:32,910
♪ Is all right with me
557
00:19:32,954 --> 00:19:34,651
Yeah.
558
00:19:34,695 --> 00:19:40,440
♪ 'Cause you make me feel
so brand new ♪
559
00:19:40,483 --> 00:19:42,311
Alright, alright, Earl.
560
00:19:42,355 --> 00:19:43,747
Come on, now.
You don't have to do that.
561
00:19:43,791 --> 00:19:46,576
Alright, baby, look,
I know I'm no Al Green,
562
00:19:46,620 --> 00:19:48,099
but I'm a little Al Jarreau.
You know?
563
00:19:48,143 --> 00:19:49,536
Sit down, honey.
Hmm?
564
00:19:49,579 --> 00:19:51,451
I need to get something
off my chest.
565
00:19:51,494 --> 00:19:52,539
Is everything alright?
566
00:19:52,582 --> 00:19:53,975
[ Sighs ]
567
00:19:54,018 --> 00:19:56,499
Okay.
568
00:19:56,543 --> 00:19:58,632
Earl.
569
00:19:58,675 --> 00:20:04,812
Our song hasn't
only been "our" song.
570
00:20:04,855 --> 00:20:10,557
It's been my song
with a lot of others.
571
00:20:10,600 --> 00:20:12,733
Now, I've kept that secret
for years,
572
00:20:12,776 --> 00:20:16,171
but Junior felt I should be
honest with you.
573
00:20:16,215 --> 00:20:19,305
Well, at least that explains
why he said,
574
00:20:19,348 --> 00:20:23,613
"Hey, Pops,
come put the moves on Grandma."
575
00:20:23,657 --> 00:20:25,572
I'm sorry.
576
00:20:25,615 --> 00:20:27,095
I thought
it was harmless.
577
00:20:27,138 --> 00:20:29,445
Baby,
I don't care about that.
578
00:20:29,489 --> 00:20:33,362
I can't blame you
for loving a classic.
579
00:20:33,406 --> 00:20:37,671
And [Chuckles] I suppose
I also can't blame you
580
00:20:37,714 --> 00:20:40,195
for wanting a little consistency
in your romantic life.
581
00:20:40,239 --> 00:20:42,415
Now, I know
I haven't always been
582
00:20:42,458 --> 00:20:44,460
the best provider of that
for you.
583
00:20:44,504 --> 00:20:47,898
You're the most consistent thing
in my life, Earl.
584
00:20:47,942 --> 00:20:49,813
For better or worse.
585
00:20:49,857 --> 00:20:51,467
Mm.
586
00:20:51,511 --> 00:20:53,339
Well, let's keep aiming
for better.
587
00:20:53,382 --> 00:20:54,992
[ Laughs ]
588
00:20:55,036 --> 00:20:57,821
I love you.
589
00:20:57,865 --> 00:21:01,521
And while we're getting thingsoff our chests, um...
590
00:21:01,564 --> 00:21:02,652
No, no.
591
00:21:02,696 --> 00:21:06,090
Just hold on.Let me say this, now.
592
00:21:06,134 --> 00:21:07,831
You know, for the firstfive years we were together...
593
00:21:07,875 --> 00:21:09,877
Yes?
594
00:21:09,920 --> 00:21:12,140
...I thought your name
was Ruthie.
595
00:21:12,183 --> 00:21:14,316
I did.
596
00:21:14,360 --> 00:21:16,275
You know,if you say it like R--Oh, my God.
597
00:21:16,318 --> 00:21:17,711
Say it fast. Say it fast.You -- You --
You know what?
598
00:21:17,754 --> 00:21:19,365
Ruby, Ruth.You might want
to shut up
599
00:21:19,408 --> 00:21:20,104
like right now.Ruby, Ruthie.
600
00:21:20,148 --> 00:21:21,628
Just let it go.
601
00:21:21,671 --> 00:21:23,369
Let it go 'cause I heard you
scream that one night.