1 00:00:01,269 --> 00:00:04,037 Mom, can you come here, please? 2 00:00:04,072 --> 00:00:05,739 What?! 3 00:00:05,773 --> 00:00:07,574 - I said, come here, please! - You come here! 4 00:00:07,608 --> 00:00:09,709 We got a big box sent to us! 5 00:00:09,744 --> 00:00:11,044 - We did? - It's a package! 6 00:00:11,079 --> 00:00:12,546 - Who's it from? - I don't know. 7 00:00:12,580 --> 00:00:15,515 Oh! It's for me! 8 00:00:15,550 --> 00:00:18,819 Thinking of you! 9 00:00:18,853 --> 00:00:21,388 "Dear M., hope this helps, 10 00:00:21,422 --> 00:00:24,958 I only wish I could do more, xoxo, J.S.P." 11 00:00:24,992 --> 00:00:27,727 Justine St. Pierre! 12 00:00:27,762 --> 00:00:31,098 David, one of my dear friends is finally reaching out, 13 00:00:31,132 --> 00:00:33,900 and you know what, I knew it would be Justine. 14 00:00:33,935 --> 00:00:38,438 She can be an angry drunk, but we were always close. 15 00:00:38,473 --> 00:00:40,974 "Congratulations on your Allez Vous Starter Kit." 16 00:00:41,008 --> 00:00:42,209 That frigid whore! 17 00:00:42,243 --> 00:00:43,910 What's Allez Vous? 18 00:00:43,945 --> 00:00:47,414 It's a scam, it's her stupid cosmetics company! 19 00:00:47,448 --> 00:00:49,583 It's a pyramid scheme for desperate housewives, 20 00:00:49,617 --> 00:00:51,351 and struggling actors! 21 00:00:51,385 --> 00:00:52,986 Well, how much can we make from this? 22 00:00:53,020 --> 00:00:55,255 David, it's an insult, we're sending it back! 23 00:00:55,289 --> 00:00:56,857 Well, apparently you can win an Audi. 24 00:00:56,891 --> 00:00:58,258 What colour? 25 00:00:58,292 --> 00:01:00,660 A Champagne Audi, look at that! 26 00:01:00,695 --> 00:01:04,464 As if you could ever sell enough of this crap to get a car. 27 00:01:04,499 --> 00:01:06,633 Well, Kristi Stubbs and her team out of Montreal 28 00:01:06,667 --> 00:01:08,768 have sold enough to get the car, so... 29 00:01:08,803 --> 00:01:11,104 don't believe everything you read, dear, please. 30 00:01:12,640 --> 00:01:14,307 - Burn it! - Except this mascara. 31 00:01:14,342 --> 00:01:19,479 32 00:01:22,250 --> 00:01:24,518 So Ray can't lend me his car today, 33 00:01:24,552 --> 00:01:28,255 because he has to drive his 92-year-old mother somewhere. 34 00:01:28,289 --> 00:01:31,057 Where does a 92-year-old woman need to go?! 35 00:01:31,092 --> 00:01:33,460 I don't know, John, perhaps the hospital? 36 00:01:33,494 --> 00:01:35,595 Yeah, well, it's just I needed that car 37 00:01:35,630 --> 00:01:37,430 to get to my appointment today. 38 00:01:37,465 --> 00:01:39,065 What appointment? 39 00:01:39,100 --> 00:01:41,535 Well, you know, the uh... 40 00:01:41,569 --> 00:01:43,703 Thing that I had, I had a thing that I... 41 00:01:43,738 --> 00:01:46,373 What thing? 42 00:01:46,407 --> 00:01:48,775 An unemployment thing, okay? 43 00:01:48,809 --> 00:01:50,477 To get unemployment insurance, 44 00:01:50,511 --> 00:01:52,045 I have the meeting this afternoon, 45 00:01:52,079 --> 00:01:55,081 and now I have to grovel to Roland, 46 00:01:55,116 --> 00:01:58,118 to get his truck, in order to get to Elmdale, 47 00:01:58,152 --> 00:01:59,586 to get this money... 48 00:01:59,620 --> 00:02:02,088 Well, I think you're brave, 49 00:02:02,123 --> 00:02:05,158 and while I didn't see us living off of food stamps, 50 00:02:05,193 --> 00:02:08,762 I think there is something very masculine about the way 51 00:02:08,796 --> 00:02:10,931 you're taking control of this situation. 52 00:02:10,965 --> 00:02:13,333 Sweetheart, I'm about to beg for a truck, 53 00:02:13,367 --> 00:02:15,669 in order to beg for money, 54 00:02:15,703 --> 00:02:17,204 I think you've gotta raise that masculinity bar 55 00:02:17,238 --> 00:02:20,273 just... just a little. 56 00:02:26,681 --> 00:02:28,415 - Roland! - Hey, Johnny. 57 00:02:28,449 --> 00:02:30,417 - Hi! - What? 58 00:02:30,451 --> 00:02:32,185 - Hi! - Can't hear you. 59 00:02:32,220 --> 00:02:34,087 Hey, turn the motor off! 60 00:02:34,121 --> 00:02:35,655 I can't hear you, the motor's on! 61 00:02:35,690 --> 00:02:38,558 Turn the motor off! 62 00:02:38,593 --> 00:02:42,128 Turn the motor off, you dumb son of a... 63 00:02:42,163 --> 00:02:45,832 well, what can I do for you, you "dumb son of a... "? 64 00:02:48,236 --> 00:02:51,638 Hey Roland, I need... I need to borrow your truck, 65 00:02:51,672 --> 00:02:53,840 I've got a very important appointment today, 66 00:02:53,874 --> 00:02:57,010 and I sure could use it. 67 00:02:57,044 --> 00:02:59,446 Well of course, Johnny, you know my truck is your truck, 68 00:02:59,480 --> 00:03:01,348 any time you wanna borrow it, it's fine with me, no problem- 69 00:03:01,382 --> 00:03:03,142 well, that's very, very nice, that's so nice. 70 00:03:03,150 --> 00:03:06,052 Listen, as the owner of the truck, 71 00:03:06,087 --> 00:03:07,587 would you do me one favour, though? 72 00:03:07,622 --> 00:03:09,623 When you return it, can you bring the seats back up, 73 00:03:09,657 --> 00:03:10,991 the way I had 'em, I'd appreciate that. 74 00:03:11,025 --> 00:03:12,158 - I do. - Well, you don't. 75 00:03:12,193 --> 00:03:13,293 But if could, I'd appreciate it, that'd be great. 76 00:03:13,327 --> 00:03:15,028 Well, I think I do! 77 00:03:15,062 --> 00:03:16,896 - Here's the keys, - Thank you. 78 00:03:16,931 --> 00:03:18,531 ... and also, when you return it, 79 00:03:18,566 --> 00:03:20,500 if you don't mind just backing it in, 80 00:03:20,534 --> 00:03:21,768 because in the morning, I have to kinda crick... 81 00:03:21,802 --> 00:03:24,137 Yeah, I'll back it in, I'll back it in! 82 00:03:24,171 --> 00:03:25,405 My neck like that, if you could back it in that would be terrific. 83 00:03:25,439 --> 00:03:27,140 Sure, I'll back it in. 84 00:03:27,174 --> 00:03:29,342 The wiper fluid, um... 85 00:03:29,377 --> 00:03:32,479 I had to replace sooner than usual, 86 00:03:32,513 --> 00:03:34,714 - Now, I'm not asking... - I don't touch the wiper fluid! 87 00:03:34,749 --> 00:03:36,449 - Well, okay, somebody did. - I never use it. 88 00:03:36,484 --> 00:03:38,952 Yeah well, I guess your "imaginary friend" uses wiper fluid, right? 89 00:03:38,986 --> 00:03:40,787 I don't know! I'm not asking for payback here, 90 00:03:40,821 --> 00:03:42,155 but whatever you think is fair would be terrific. 91 00:03:42,189 --> 00:03:43,790 Okay, I never use it, though. 92 00:03:43,824 --> 00:03:45,759 The radio was at a four. I like it at a ten, so... 93 00:03:45,793 --> 00:03:48,061 Okay, you know what, I'm gonna walk! 94 00:03:48,095 --> 00:03:49,529 - Where are you going? - I'm gonna walk, Roland! 95 00:03:49,563 --> 00:03:50,697 - What do you mean you're walking? - I don't want your truck! 96 00:03:50,731 --> 00:03:51,298 No, no, the truck's right there, what are you talking... 97 00:03:51,332 --> 00:03:52,198 I don't need your truck! 98 00:03:52,233 --> 00:03:54,367 It's gonna be there all day! 99 00:03:54,402 --> 00:03:55,302 I'm just asking, maybe you could put a little air 100 00:03:55,336 --> 00:03:56,970 in the tires, from time to time. 101 00:03:57,004 --> 00:03:59,205 Bonjour! 102 00:03:59,240 --> 00:04:01,541 Now that you've opened your Allez Vous starter kit, 103 00:04:01,575 --> 00:04:04,044 let's begin with those essential tips and tricks 104 00:04:04,078 --> 00:04:07,447 you'll need to make up to 600,000 dollars a year. 105 00:04:07,481 --> 00:04:09,482 That's 50,000 a month, 106 00:04:09,517 --> 00:04:12,419 that's 7,000 dollars a week. 107 00:04:12,453 --> 00:04:15,855 No, it isn't! She didn't finish high school. 108 00:04:15,890 --> 00:04:17,991 Now, you've heard of other get rich quick schemes, 109 00:04:18,025 --> 00:04:20,894 but this isn't a scheme, it's a system. 110 00:04:20,928 --> 00:04:25,665 Look at the work she's had done, it's grotesque. 111 00:04:25,700 --> 00:04:26,933 Go grab a pen and paper, 112 00:04:26,967 --> 00:04:28,802 because I'm about to share with you some essential 113 00:04:28,836 --> 00:04:32,439 tips and tricks to maximize your sales productivity. 114 00:04:32,473 --> 00:04:34,374 If this seems like a dream come true, 115 00:04:34,408 --> 00:04:38,545 you need to pay attention to my tips and tricks. 116 00:04:38,579 --> 00:04:40,213 But the best part is, the products sell themselves! 117 00:04:40,247 --> 00:04:41,715 Okay, where are the tips and tricks? 118 00:04:41,749 --> 00:04:42,449 We've been watching this for five minutes, 119 00:04:42,483 --> 00:04:43,817 she's talking in circles! 120 00:04:43,851 --> 00:04:46,353 Because it's a scam! 121 00:04:46,387 --> 00:04:47,354 But if your father's willing to go out there 122 00:04:47,388 --> 00:04:49,089 and sell his soul, dear, 123 00:04:49,123 --> 00:04:52,692 the least we can do is try to sell this garbage. 124 00:04:52,727 --> 00:04:54,227 What's this? Huh? 125 00:04:54,261 --> 00:04:57,197 Oh, it's a sunless bronzing. 126 00:04:57,231 --> 00:04:59,199 Okay, let's sell it, how hard could it be? 127 00:04:59,233 --> 00:05:00,600 You sell you. 128 00:05:00,634 --> 00:05:04,104 You sell you using Allez Vous. 129 00:05:04,138 --> 00:05:05,839 Okay, we're going to have a luncheon. 130 00:05:05,873 --> 00:05:07,574 A luncheon? 131 00:05:07,608 --> 00:05:10,443 Mm-hmm, a luncheon for our little townie friends. 132 00:05:10,478 --> 00:05:14,447 It's the least we could do. Hmm! 133 00:05:14,482 --> 00:05:16,716 System, support, tips, tricks, community, opportunity, tips... 134 00:05:16,751 --> 00:05:18,818 Twyla? 135 00:05:18,853 --> 00:05:20,653 - Hey, what's up? - Nothing. 136 00:05:20,688 --> 00:05:24,424 So um, Ted ordered toast, not home fries, 137 00:05:24,458 --> 00:05:26,159 and he got home fries, so would you just be a peach, and... 138 00:05:26,193 --> 00:05:27,827 Oh, sorry. 139 00:05:27,862 --> 00:05:29,729 No, you know what? It's okay. I'm good with it. 140 00:05:29,764 --> 00:05:33,032 I like home fries, I'm gonna eat 'em, so. 141 00:05:33,067 --> 00:05:37,103 First day of a cleanse, so she's a little whoo! 142 00:05:37,138 --> 00:05:39,406 Okay, so I can take it back. 143 00:05:39,440 --> 00:05:40,840 - That would actually be great, if you wouldn't... - No, no thank you. 144 00:05:40,875 --> 00:05:43,410 Lex, if you'll just let me eat my breakfast here, 145 00:05:43,444 --> 00:05:44,310 it's not like there's broken glass in it. 146 00:05:44,345 --> 00:05:45,845 There's broken glass? 147 00:05:45,880 --> 00:05:47,914 No, there is not broken glass in it, 148 00:05:47,948 --> 00:05:50,784 just a lot of great flavours that I can't wait to taste. 149 00:05:50,818 --> 00:05:52,152 Great! 150 00:05:54,021 --> 00:05:56,823 Thank you. 151 00:05:56,857 --> 00:05:58,658 I'm just trying to help you. 152 00:05:58,692 --> 00:06:02,695 Well, if you wanna help, eat something. 153 00:06:02,730 --> 00:06:04,998 I do not like what this cleanse is doing to your brain. 154 00:06:05,032 --> 00:06:07,667 You're being very rude! 155 00:06:07,701 --> 00:06:09,002 I'm sorry for yelling. 156 00:06:20,347 --> 00:06:22,015 Ain't she a beaut? 157 00:06:22,049 --> 00:06:23,183 Boy, is she ever, Bob. 158 00:06:23,217 --> 00:06:25,485 You know, I uh... 159 00:06:25,519 --> 00:06:27,187 I woke up this morning, I said to myself, 160 00:06:27,221 --> 00:06:29,389 Johnny, you've gotta buy yourself a car. 161 00:06:29,423 --> 00:06:31,658 You may have a business meeting in Elmdale one day, 162 00:06:31,692 --> 00:06:33,593 and you're gonna be in trouble. 163 00:06:33,627 --> 00:06:35,562 Yeah, I wouldn't have thought this was your cup of tea. 164 00:06:35,596 --> 00:06:39,365 Oh, this is exactly what I was looking for! 165 00:06:39,400 --> 00:06:43,036 Yeah, I'd love to take this baby out for a test drive. 166 00:06:43,070 --> 00:06:45,905 Yeah? I've got the keys, let's take 'er for a spin. 167 00:06:45,940 --> 00:06:47,941 Not with you, Bob, I don't wanna bother you. 168 00:06:47,975 --> 00:06:50,743 It's no bother. 169 00:06:50,778 --> 00:06:53,213 I would just love to take this out myself, Bob, 170 00:06:53,247 --> 00:06:55,482 you know, a little peccadillo of mine when I'm buying a car, 171 00:06:55,516 --> 00:06:58,017 I like to experience the car one on one, 172 00:06:58,052 --> 00:06:59,619 just me and the machine, 173 00:06:59,653 --> 00:07:00,820 you know what I mean? 174 00:07:00,855 --> 00:07:03,456 No, I don't. 175 00:07:03,491 --> 00:07:04,858 I just wanna take it out for a test drive, Bob, 176 00:07:04,892 --> 00:07:06,559 just for a spin. 177 00:07:06,594 --> 00:07:08,528 So... Once around the block? 178 00:07:08,562 --> 00:07:10,063 Oh yeah, once around the block, 179 00:07:10,097 --> 00:07:11,197 you know, maybe around the corner, 180 00:07:11,232 --> 00:07:12,365 up the road a bit. 181 00:07:12,399 --> 00:07:14,033 What road? 182 00:07:14,068 --> 00:07:16,035 Well, this road, I'll take it up this road. 183 00:07:16,070 --> 00:07:18,004 Okay, but no lefts, okay? 184 00:07:18,038 --> 00:07:19,906 Because they lead to the highway, 185 00:07:19,940 --> 00:07:24,177 and I really don't want her on the highway. 186 00:07:24,211 --> 00:07:27,680 Why would I take it on the highway? 187 00:07:27,715 --> 00:07:31,351 ♪ driving down that highway of life ♪ 188 00:07:31,385 --> 00:07:34,420 ♪ feelin' fine and feelin' sunny ♪ 189 00:07:34,455 --> 00:07:36,990 ♪ going to pick me up some money ♪ 190 00:07:40,261 --> 00:07:41,694 You do know that just staring at the fence 191 00:07:41,729 --> 00:07:43,363 isn't gonna help me fix it, right? 192 00:07:43,397 --> 00:07:46,199 Yeah, I am. 193 00:07:46,233 --> 00:07:48,401 I'm just thinking about Ted, and how nice he is, 194 00:07:48,435 --> 00:07:50,403 and... generous, 195 00:07:50,437 --> 00:07:52,472 like, almost too generous. 196 00:07:52,506 --> 00:07:54,908 And I just wanna grab him by the sweater sometime, 197 00:07:54,942 --> 00:07:57,944 and be like, "stop being so generous and nice!" 198 00:07:57,978 --> 00:07:59,946 He always has been. 199 00:07:59,980 --> 00:08:01,047 I feel bad thinking about all those times 200 00:08:01,081 --> 00:08:03,383 I pinned him against a locker. 201 00:08:03,417 --> 00:08:06,920 You pinned somebody against a locker?! 202 00:08:06,954 --> 00:08:09,556 Well, I was a different person then, 203 00:08:09,590 --> 00:08:12,392 a lot changed since after high school. 204 00:08:12,426 --> 00:08:15,295 So what did he do to make you such a teenage cliché? 205 00:08:15,329 --> 00:08:17,096 He always said hi when he passed me in the halls, 206 00:08:17,131 --> 00:08:19,132 and for some reason, it bugged me. 207 00:08:19,166 --> 00:08:21,134 Yeah, I can see that. 208 00:08:21,168 --> 00:08:23,202 So he's bugging you. 209 00:08:23,237 --> 00:08:24,671 What? No! Oh my God, no! 210 00:08:24,705 --> 00:08:26,573 Oh yes. 211 00:08:26,607 --> 00:08:29,175 No, I'm just saying, generally speaking, 212 00:08:29,209 --> 00:08:31,778 when you order breakfast and they give you the wrong order, 213 00:08:31,812 --> 00:08:34,447 send it back and get the right order. 214 00:08:34,481 --> 00:08:37,016 I never return food, I think that's so rude. 215 00:08:44,391 --> 00:08:46,492 Oh no! 216 00:08:46,527 --> 00:08:49,395 Oh, son of a bum! 217 00:08:49,430 --> 00:08:51,831 Son of a bitch! 218 00:08:55,769 --> 00:08:59,305 Argh! What the hell?! 219 00:08:59,340 --> 00:09:01,207 Ugh! 220 00:09:02,977 --> 00:09:05,078 Oh! 221 00:09:05,112 --> 00:09:07,914 Oh! 222 00:09:19,093 --> 00:09:21,427 Well, the good news is all you need is a new fan belt, 223 00:09:21,462 --> 00:09:22,428 and then you'll be right back on the road. 224 00:09:22,463 --> 00:09:24,364 Good, good. 225 00:09:24,398 --> 00:09:26,666 Well, it was important I get to Elmdale today, Roland, 226 00:09:26,700 --> 00:09:28,835 I appreciate you helping me out. 227 00:09:28,869 --> 00:09:30,637 Ah, it's no problem, Johnny. 228 00:09:30,671 --> 00:09:34,374 So, where in Elmdale am I taking you? 229 00:09:34,408 --> 00:09:38,611 Oh, just the general downtown area will be fine. 230 00:09:38,646 --> 00:09:42,015 Okay, don't wanna tell me where we're going, interesting. 231 00:09:42,049 --> 00:09:44,217 It's uh, just... just a business meeting, 232 00:09:44,251 --> 00:09:45,451 just I've gotta meet a guy. 233 00:09:45,486 --> 00:09:47,353 Uh huh, what guy? 234 00:09:47,388 --> 00:09:49,722 A financial guy, it's a financial matter. 235 00:09:49,757 --> 00:09:51,224 Well Johnny, it's gonna be awfully hard for me 236 00:09:51,258 --> 00:09:53,059 to get you to this meeting if I don't know where we're going! 237 00:09:53,093 --> 00:09:55,495 I mean, why is this such a big secret? 238 00:09:55,529 --> 00:09:57,664 It's not a big secret, it's not a big secret, Roland, 239 00:09:57,698 --> 00:09:59,599 and you're only doing 25, if we could pick it up a little... 240 00:09:59,633 --> 00:10:01,200 Oh my God, now you're in such a hurry. 241 00:10:01,235 --> 00:10:03,002 What's the big rush here? I don't get that, either! 242 00:10:03,037 --> 00:10:04,504 The office closes at four o'clock, that's all. 243 00:10:04,538 --> 00:10:06,139 What office are you talking about? 244 00:10:06,173 --> 00:10:07,006 The financial guy that I'm seeing, his office... 245 00:10:07,041 --> 00:10:08,541 What financial guy? 246 00:10:08,575 --> 00:10:10,777 The guy I'm doing business with, I told you... 247 00:10:10,811 --> 00:10:12,345 - Where are we going?! - The unemployment office! 248 00:10:12,379 --> 00:10:14,514 Okay? 249 00:10:14,548 --> 00:10:18,785 I'm applying for unemployment. 250 00:10:18,819 --> 00:10:20,687 Jeez pal, your business is your business. 251 00:10:20,721 --> 00:10:21,754 I don't know why you're telling me! 252 00:10:26,681 --> 00:10:29,181 Well, good afternoon! 253 00:10:29,320 --> 00:10:31,655 Everyone have a full glass, I hope? 254 00:10:31,689 --> 00:10:33,557 We've wanted to have you all here for ages, 255 00:10:33,591 --> 00:10:35,292 you've all so graciously welcomed us 256 00:10:35,326 --> 00:10:38,495 into your heavenly hamlet! 257 00:10:38,529 --> 00:10:41,898 Now, if you'll be so good as to follow me, 258 00:10:41,933 --> 00:10:43,333 David is setting out some hors d'oeuvres 259 00:10:43,367 --> 00:10:45,836 in our adjoining suite. 260 00:10:45,870 --> 00:10:49,139 David! We have guests! 261 00:10:49,173 --> 00:10:51,107 You were supposed to have cleaned up all these quality products! 262 00:10:51,142 --> 00:10:53,810 I must've lost track of time. 263 00:10:53,845 --> 00:10:56,947 Now the seating areas are covered in Allez Vous cosmetics! 264 00:10:56,981 --> 00:10:59,482 I know, I just didn't want to put such high quality 265 00:10:59,517 --> 00:11:02,853 paraben and paba free product on the floor! 266 00:11:02,887 --> 00:11:07,157 Come on in. 267 00:11:07,191 --> 00:11:09,693 Okay, well everything's going super well, I can see, so... 268 00:11:09,727 --> 00:11:11,494 well no, come on, we've gotta stay for a bit. 269 00:11:11,529 --> 00:11:13,530 No, we've made our appearance, and now we can go. 270 00:11:13,564 --> 00:11:15,932 Your mom asked me to come. 271 00:11:15,967 --> 00:11:17,968 Well, she asked everybody to come. 272 00:11:18,002 --> 00:11:19,769 Can you not just say no for one time, Ted?! 273 00:11:22,440 --> 00:11:25,809 Jocelyn, you can hold this lip plumper. 274 00:11:25,843 --> 00:11:27,878 Ronnie, this is a mineral moisturizer, 275 00:11:27,912 --> 00:11:30,213 you could keep it on your lap, or sample it. 276 00:11:30,248 --> 00:11:32,716 David, now is not the time to discuss Allez Vous' 277 00:11:32,750 --> 00:11:34,618 preferred customer discounts. 278 00:11:34,652 --> 00:11:37,320 Oh! 279 00:11:37,355 --> 00:11:39,055 Actually, I think I'm going to be getting lunch elsewhere. 280 00:11:39,090 --> 00:11:40,457 Can I come with you? 281 00:11:40,491 --> 00:11:42,058 I don't think so. 282 00:11:42,093 --> 00:11:45,695 Now you get all decisive-y? 283 00:11:45,730 --> 00:11:48,131 I was just so excited about Allez Vous' exclusive 284 00:11:48,165 --> 00:11:51,735 anti-aging formula, and rejuvenation serums. 285 00:11:51,769 --> 00:11:53,637 Alexis, you'd like this product. 286 00:11:53,671 --> 00:11:55,839 It's all about aging, and dry skin. 287 00:11:55,873 --> 00:11:58,341 Oh my God, ew, David! 288 00:11:58,376 --> 00:12:00,477 David, I know you're excited to be part 289 00:12:00,511 --> 00:12:02,812 of the fastest growing multilevel marketing community 290 00:12:02,847 --> 00:12:06,750 on the continent, but honestly! 291 00:12:06,784 --> 00:12:08,184 There's something wrong with your face. 292 00:12:08,219 --> 00:12:10,787 With my face? 293 00:12:10,821 --> 00:12:12,756 Well, if any of you do happen to have questions 294 00:12:12,790 --> 00:12:14,991 about the products, 295 00:12:15,026 --> 00:12:18,795 or how to make up to 600,000 dollars a year, 296 00:12:18,829 --> 00:12:22,198 I suppose I'd be willing to share with you what I know. 297 00:12:28,272 --> 00:12:31,441 In the meantime, please, eat, drink, 298 00:12:31,475 --> 00:12:34,311 to your possible beauty! 299 00:12:36,147 --> 00:12:38,114 How can I help you today, sir? 300 00:12:38,149 --> 00:12:39,883 Uh, yes, Johnny Rose, I have an appointment to get some money. 301 00:12:39,917 --> 00:12:42,052 Get some money? 302 00:12:42,086 --> 00:12:44,888 I need a cheque, preferably today. 303 00:12:44,922 --> 00:12:46,523 Ideally in the next few minutes, 304 00:12:46,557 --> 00:12:48,658 'cause I have somebody waiting in the car. 305 00:12:48,693 --> 00:12:52,028 Well, we don't just give out money. 306 00:12:52,063 --> 00:12:53,797 First we need some information. 307 00:12:53,831 --> 00:12:55,799 Oh yeah, sure, yeah. Hm-hm. 308 00:12:55,833 --> 00:12:58,702 - Your name? - Johnny Rose. 309 00:12:58,736 --> 00:13:01,104 - Last employer? - Johnny Rose. 310 00:13:01,138 --> 00:13:02,439 And how long did you work for yourself? 311 00:13:02,473 --> 00:13:05,875 All my life. 312 00:13:05,910 --> 00:13:08,745 And your reason for being out of work? 313 00:13:08,779 --> 00:13:12,549 I sold my business, and I got screwed by my business manager. 314 00:13:12,583 --> 00:13:15,018 Did you pay into unemployment insurance? 315 00:13:15,052 --> 00:13:17,754 I don't know, maybe I did, maybe I didn't, 316 00:13:17,788 --> 00:13:21,758 it never came across my desk, I uh... 317 00:13:21,792 --> 00:13:26,730 We can't give you money unless you contributed to the program. 318 00:13:26,764 --> 00:13:28,365 I don't think you're understanding, 319 00:13:28,399 --> 00:13:31,801 I employed people, hundreds of people. 320 00:13:31,836 --> 00:13:34,270 You see, and now I'm unemployed. 321 00:13:34,305 --> 00:13:36,840 But that doesn't mean you qualify for unemployment. 322 00:13:36,874 --> 00:13:38,308 I lost my job! 323 00:13:38,342 --> 00:13:40,043 You lost your business. 324 00:13:40,077 --> 00:13:42,579 Okay, let me walk you through this. 325 00:13:42,613 --> 00:13:45,749 You see, I need money to get back on my feet 326 00:13:45,783 --> 00:13:48,451 so I can employ more people, 327 00:13:48,486 --> 00:13:50,587 that might actually end up saving you money in the long run 328 00:13:50,621 --> 00:13:52,122 now, am I the only one who understands 329 00:13:52,156 --> 00:13:53,790 how an economy works around here?! 330 00:13:53,824 --> 00:13:56,459 Let me walk you through this, Mr. Rose. 331 00:13:56,494 --> 00:13:59,295 Unless you can prove that you contributed, you don't qualify. 332 00:13:59,330 --> 00:14:00,997 If you were laid off, or fired, 333 00:14:01,032 --> 00:14:02,265 or could show that you were out looking for work, 334 00:14:02,299 --> 00:14:03,900 that would be a different story. 335 00:14:03,934 --> 00:14:05,368 I'd like to talk to your supervisor, please. 336 00:14:05,403 --> 00:14:08,271 I am the supervisor. 337 00:14:08,305 --> 00:14:11,808 And, may I say, doing a fantastic job. 338 00:14:14,478 --> 00:14:18,948 And who's interested? 339 00:14:18,983 --> 00:14:21,484 Well, it doesn't look like anybody's really interested. 340 00:14:21,519 --> 00:14:23,486 Get out! 341 00:14:23,521 --> 00:14:29,125 I know someone here wants in on this exclusive opportunity! 342 00:14:29,160 --> 00:14:31,027 Moira, honey, that Champagne Audi is really hard to get. 343 00:14:31,062 --> 00:14:33,730 Excuse me? 344 00:14:33,764 --> 00:14:35,932 Take it from me, Roland and I have been Allez Vous reps 345 00:14:35,966 --> 00:14:39,769 for two years, and we're still driving that old truck. 346 00:14:39,804 --> 00:14:43,406 Sorry, you're... you're an Allez Vous consultant? 347 00:14:43,441 --> 00:14:46,076 I'm actually an executive area manager. 348 00:14:46,110 --> 00:14:48,445 I'm a district manager. 349 00:14:48,479 --> 00:14:50,346 I'm an executive district manager. 350 00:14:50,381 --> 00:14:51,581 I gave up. 351 00:14:51,615 --> 00:14:53,950 What?! 352 00:14:53,984 --> 00:14:55,485 The Allez Vous craze hit the town a couple years ago, 353 00:14:55,519 --> 00:14:57,554 and you should've seen us! 354 00:14:57,588 --> 00:14:59,322 In two weeks we had sold everything 355 00:14:59,356 --> 00:15:01,224 to the other half of town, and vice versa. 356 00:15:01,258 --> 00:15:03,993 That's... that's funny. 357 00:15:04,028 --> 00:15:07,330 It became a bit incestuous, yeah, very small sales pool. 358 00:15:07,364 --> 00:15:10,633 It became literally impossible to climb the ladder. 359 00:15:10,668 --> 00:15:13,636 Anywho, good luck! 360 00:15:18,609 --> 00:15:20,944 Somehow, we got off on the wrong foot. 361 00:15:20,978 --> 00:15:24,380 Okay? So if I in any way gave you the impression that- 362 00:15:24,415 --> 00:15:26,416 I am locking up now, Mr. Rose. 363 00:15:26,450 --> 00:15:27,050 Johnny, how long is this gonna take, 364 00:15:27,084 --> 00:15:29,619 'cause I got a couple- 365 00:15:29,653 --> 00:15:31,754 Roland? 366 00:15:31,789 --> 00:15:35,592 Well Marnie, hello. How are you? 367 00:15:35,626 --> 00:15:37,727 Haven't seen you in a while. 368 00:15:37,761 --> 00:15:41,531 Yeah, it has been a while, hasn't it? 369 00:15:41,565 --> 00:15:44,467 Marnie and I were, um, how shall I say it? 370 00:15:44,502 --> 00:15:47,403 "Close friends" in high school. 371 00:15:47,438 --> 00:15:48,838 Isn't that right, Marnie? 372 00:15:48,873 --> 00:15:50,874 Okay, that's enough of that. 373 00:15:50,908 --> 00:15:52,628 Marnie likes the bad boys. 374 00:15:52,643 --> 00:15:54,911 Roland! 375 00:15:54,945 --> 00:15:56,479 Are you taking care of my bad boy over there? 376 00:15:56,514 --> 00:15:58,081 No, she's being quite obstinate about this whole situation. 377 00:15:58,115 --> 00:16:00,617 I'm getting nothing! 378 00:16:00,651 --> 00:16:02,785 Well, unfortunately, Mr. Rose doesn't qualify 379 00:16:02,820 --> 00:16:05,722 for unemployment because he's never had a job. 380 00:16:05,756 --> 00:16:07,157 Oh well, didn't he tell you about the job 381 00:16:07,191 --> 00:16:09,626 - he was doing for me? - No, what job? 382 00:16:09,660 --> 00:16:12,195 You didn't tell her? 383 00:16:12,229 --> 00:16:15,632 No-no, not specifically, I-I-uh... 384 00:16:15,666 --> 00:16:17,300 Well, that's important information, Mr. Rose. 385 00:16:17,334 --> 00:16:19,369 You working for Roland makes you an employee. 386 00:16:19,403 --> 00:16:22,205 - Yes! - Oh! I forgot. 387 00:16:22,239 --> 00:16:24,841 Well, what were your duties? 388 00:16:24,875 --> 00:16:27,277 Well, I was in more of a consulting position. 389 00:16:27,311 --> 00:16:30,146 Oh! No, no, no, no, no. 390 00:16:30,181 --> 00:16:32,415 It was not a consulting position, he was my assistant, 391 00:16:32,449 --> 00:16:33,883 he was like my little guy Friday. 392 00:16:33,918 --> 00:16:35,485 He would fetch things for me, 393 00:16:35,519 --> 00:16:37,287 I'd tell him where to go and he'd go running off, 394 00:16:37,321 --> 00:16:38,988 and fetching things for me. 395 00:16:39,023 --> 00:16:40,690 What were some of the things you fetched? 396 00:16:40,724 --> 00:16:43,159 - You fetched like uh... - Coffee. 397 00:16:43,194 --> 00:16:45,094 - Coffee, you'd get that, and um... - I get his coffee... 398 00:16:45,129 --> 00:16:47,597 - Sometimes you'd have to... - Get a hankie. 399 00:16:47,631 --> 00:16:50,099 - No, you'd pick up, you know... - Cleaning, his dry cleaning. 400 00:16:50,134 --> 00:16:51,334 - Yeah, you'd have to do that, and then... - Just when he didn't have time. 401 00:16:51,368 --> 00:16:53,102 How about these guys down there, those are boots. 402 00:16:53,137 --> 00:16:54,237 Nothing with the boots, I don't think there was- 403 00:16:54,271 --> 00:16:55,605 Oh, there was something with the boots. 404 00:16:55,639 --> 00:16:57,373 Polish them every once in a while. 405 00:16:57,408 --> 00:16:59,008 Every now and then, he had to do that, too. 406 00:16:59,043 --> 00:17:02,011 He was a hell of a worker and I really, really needed him, 407 00:17:02,046 --> 00:17:06,115 because you know how busy I can get. 408 00:17:06,150 --> 00:17:07,784 Yes I do. 409 00:17:11,021 --> 00:17:13,890 Yeah, unfortunately I had to can his ass though, 410 00:17:13,924 --> 00:17:16,593 because of that whole "cut the gravy" thing, so. 411 00:17:16,627 --> 00:17:19,729 Oh. Well... 412 00:17:19,763 --> 00:17:22,398 I think we can make this work. 413 00:17:28,973 --> 00:17:31,808 Hey... I come in peace. 414 00:17:31,842 --> 00:17:34,043 What's this? 415 00:17:34,078 --> 00:17:37,680 I don't know, it's a pre shave follicle mask or something, 416 00:17:37,715 --> 00:17:42,151 I took it from the pile of product that nobody bought. 417 00:17:42,186 --> 00:17:43,920 Sweet gesture. 418 00:17:47,691 --> 00:17:49,892 I'm sorry for being rude. 419 00:17:49,927 --> 00:17:51,361 You have to understand that you're the first 420 00:17:51,395 --> 00:17:53,062 nice guy that I've dated. 421 00:17:53,097 --> 00:17:56,132 Lex, I am not always nice. 422 00:17:56,166 --> 00:17:57,766 I just really want my family to like you. 423 00:17:57,768 --> 00:17:59,936 They don't like me? 424 00:17:59,970 --> 00:18:02,338 No, they do! They do, they've just always seen nice as a sign of weakness, 425 00:18:02,373 --> 00:18:04,107 they take advantage of nice. 426 00:18:04,141 --> 00:18:07,644 No, nice does not always mean weak, it's... 427 00:18:07,678 --> 00:18:11,714 Okay, so get mad, then. 428 00:18:11,749 --> 00:18:14,217 Say something super mean. 429 00:18:14,251 --> 00:18:18,221 What, I can't just turn it on in an instant, like you can. 430 00:18:18,255 --> 00:18:22,625 Okay well, consider it a kind of role play then, 431 00:18:22,660 --> 00:18:25,328 and just let it out. 432 00:18:25,362 --> 00:18:29,599 I-I don't know... 433 00:18:29,633 --> 00:18:32,635 I find your brother can be a little pretentious sometimes. 434 00:18:32,670 --> 00:18:34,470 Yes, yes! 435 00:18:34,505 --> 00:18:36,839 He is so pretentious, and it is so gross. 436 00:18:36,874 --> 00:18:38,174 This is good, keep going. 437 00:18:38,208 --> 00:18:40,710 Well, and your mother... 438 00:18:40,744 --> 00:18:43,313 Seems to be a little uninformed at times. 439 00:18:43,347 --> 00:18:46,182 She's uninformed most of the time. 440 00:18:46,216 --> 00:18:47,576 This is great, this is really good. 441 00:18:47,584 --> 00:18:49,152 Keep going! 442 00:18:49,186 --> 00:18:50,853 Well, and you, what about you? 443 00:18:50,888 --> 00:18:51,988 Are you just going to sit around all day, 444 00:18:52,022 --> 00:18:53,323 while I work and buy you dinners? 445 00:18:53,357 --> 00:18:55,291 You've gotta go out there and get a job... 446 00:18:55,326 --> 00:18:56,726 - Too far. - Mm-hmm. 447 00:18:56,760 --> 00:18:59,262 - It's too far, okay. - That's too far. 448 00:18:59,296 --> 00:19:01,731 All right, and there we go. 449 00:19:01,765 --> 00:19:04,200 - Boy, thank you! - Oh, stop it. 450 00:19:04,234 --> 00:19:08,638 No, no, Roland, I-I owe you big. 451 00:19:08,672 --> 00:19:12,308 Well um, one day, and that day may never come, 452 00:19:12,343 --> 00:19:15,111 I may call upon you to perform a function. 453 00:19:15,145 --> 00:19:16,579 Marlon Brando! 454 00:19:16,613 --> 00:19:19,048 Yes, but from what movie? 455 00:19:19,083 --> 00:19:21,484 The Godfather. 456 00:19:21,518 --> 00:19:23,353 No, it's the one where he's the big mafia guy. 457 00:19:23,387 --> 00:19:25,655 The Godfather! 458 00:19:25,689 --> 00:19:28,024 Hold on a second, I'll think of it. 459 00:19:28,058 --> 00:19:31,761 Anyway, I appreciate what you've done, Roland, I really do, I'm- 460 00:19:31,795 --> 00:19:34,063 Don't you worry about it, Johnny, I'm happy to do it. 461 00:19:34,098 --> 00:19:36,366 Why don't you just get me a little wiper fluid, 462 00:19:36,400 --> 00:19:38,034 and we'll call it even, okay? 463 00:19:38,068 --> 00:19:39,602 Okay, wiper fluid, you got it. 464 00:19:39,636 --> 00:19:41,070 And also maybe a Kleenex caddy? 465 00:19:41,105 --> 00:19:42,705 I've always wanted one of those. 466 00:19:42,740 --> 00:19:44,173 That's funny! 467 00:19:44,208 --> 00:19:46,342 It is, but I'm not joking. 468 00:19:46,377 --> 00:19:49,679 All right, one Kleenex caddy, and wiper fluid. 469 00:20:00,090 --> 00:20:01,557 Roland, you screwed it up! 470 00:20:03,727 --> 00:20:04,927 Roland! 471 00:20:06,430 --> 00:20:07,830 Roland! 472 00:20:10,000 --> 00:20:12,934 Son of a bitch! 473 00:20:16,297 --> 00:20:19,065 Oh Johnny, I told you not to take 'er on the highway. 474 00:20:19,698 --> 00:20:21,666 Yeah, I'm sorry, Bob, 475 00:20:21,700 --> 00:20:24,869 I guess I took one of those left turns, and uh, yeah. 476 00:20:24,904 --> 00:20:27,105 Okay, well, let's get 'er hooked up, 477 00:20:27,139 --> 00:20:29,474 get you back to the garage, 478 00:20:29,508 --> 00:20:30,675 and we'll start on the paperwork. 479 00:20:30,709 --> 00:20:33,511 What paperwork? 480 00:20:33,545 --> 00:20:36,481 It's all filled in, you just have to sign it, and uh... 481 00:20:36,515 --> 00:20:38,449 She's all yours! 482 00:20:38,484 --> 00:20:40,051 I'm not buying this car! 483 00:20:40,085 --> 00:20:41,819 You change your mind? 484 00:20:41,854 --> 00:20:45,023 It broke, twice! It's a broken car! 485 00:20:45,057 --> 00:20:46,791 We'll play a little hardball, okay. 486 00:20:46,825 --> 00:20:49,427 I'll knock twenty bucks off. 487 00:20:49,461 --> 00:20:51,021 You couldn't get twenty bucks for scrap! 488 00:20:51,030 --> 00:20:52,897 Oh! 489 00:20:52,932 --> 00:20:54,766 All right, thirty bucks! 490 00:20:54,800 --> 00:20:56,601 How about zero bucks?! 491 00:20:56,635 --> 00:20:58,169 I wouldn't give you a dime for this! 492 00:20:58,203 --> 00:20:59,771 Johnny, you're killing me here! 493 00:20:59,805 --> 00:21:01,639 Fifty bucks! 494 00:21:01,674 --> 00:21:05,843 Oh, you know what, Bob, I'm walking. I'm walking! 495 00:21:05,878 --> 00:21:07,679 I'll throw in a couple of floor mats, 496 00:21:07,713 --> 00:21:08,880 but that's my final offer! 497 00:21:08,914 --> 00:21:09,580 Walking!