1 00:00:01,268 --> 00:00:03,335 (Birds chirp, cars rumble) 2 00:00:05,639 --> 00:00:08,040 - Alexis, I just got an email from your school. 3 00:00:08,075 --> 00:00:09,641 - Okay, in my defense, 4 00:00:09,676 --> 00:00:11,276 I did not know he was a substitute teacher, 5 00:00:11,311 --> 00:00:13,045 and basically, nothing happened. 6 00:00:13,080 --> 00:00:14,379 - Okay, well, that's not it, 7 00:00:14,414 --> 00:00:16,682 and please don't go down that path again. 8 00:00:16,717 --> 00:00:19,918 Apparently there's a lice outbreak in your class. 9 00:00:19,953 --> 00:00:21,954 - Oh my God! - Ewww! 10 00:00:21,989 --> 00:00:24,189 Ugh, it's probably Kelsey, 11 00:00:24,224 --> 00:00:25,891 she's such a horse girl. 12 00:00:25,926 --> 00:00:28,126 - Honestly Alexis, if you don't like the way somebody looks-- 13 00:00:28,161 --> 00:00:29,862 - Dad, that's so mean! 14 00:00:29,897 --> 00:00:31,196 She doesn't look like a horse, 15 00:00:31,231 --> 00:00:32,698 she just talks about them a lot. 16 00:00:32,733 --> 00:00:34,132 And smells a bit. 17 00:00:34,167 --> 00:00:35,968 - (Gasps) You know, you keep scratching. 18 00:00:36,003 --> 00:00:38,003 - Ewww! 19 00:00:38,038 --> 00:00:40,973 - No, I'm just allergic to the down pillow. 20 00:00:41,008 --> 00:00:43,375 - No, no, you probably have lice. 21 00:00:43,410 --> 00:00:46,712 You're scratching because you have lice! 22 00:00:46,747 --> 00:00:49,948 - Wait a minute, we were in all the rooms changing the sheets! 23 00:00:49,983 --> 00:00:52,251 - Okay, how-can lice jump? 24 00:00:53,553 --> 00:00:55,153 Because if I was sleeping in my bed, 25 00:00:55,188 --> 00:00:57,289 could a lice jump from her bed to my bed? 26 00:00:57,324 --> 00:00:59,057 - Can everyone stop saying lice please?! 27 00:00:59,092 --> 00:01:01,326 - Now I've gotta go back and change all the sheets again. 28 00:01:01,361 --> 00:01:03,795 - Okay, how do I know that she didn't give me her lice? 29 00:01:03,830 --> 00:01:05,130 - David, you don't have lice. 30 00:01:05,165 --> 00:01:06,832 - Nobody here has lice! 31 00:01:06,867 --> 00:01:08,533 - No, no, you do! 32 00:01:08,568 --> 00:01:10,168 You-you have the lice! 33 00:01:10,203 --> 00:01:11,870 - Ah! - Ughhh! 34 00:01:11,905 --> 00:01:13,305 - Oh! Aah! 35 00:01:13,340 --> 00:01:14,673 - Alexis, you've gotta go to the store 36 00:01:14,708 --> 00:01:17,376 and get something to deal with that now! 37 00:01:17,411 --> 00:01:19,878 Okay, I've gotta go back and change all the sheets. 38 00:01:19,913 --> 00:01:21,847 - Oh! This is the last time 39 00:01:21,882 --> 00:01:23,415 I take a pity selfie with Kelsey! 40 00:01:23,450 --> 00:01:24,850 - Get away from me! - Aah! 41 00:01:24,885 --> 00:01:29,221 ♪ ♪ 42 00:01:30,657 --> 00:01:31,857 (Cart rattles) 43 00:01:35,495 --> 00:01:37,996 - (Knocking) Housekeeping. 44 00:01:38,031 --> 00:01:39,464 - Hello! - Oh, hi. 45 00:01:39,499 --> 00:01:41,867 Uh, just here for the complimentary... 46 00:01:41,902 --> 00:01:43,335 sheet change. 47 00:01:43,370 --> 00:01:45,404 - But the bed's already made up. 48 00:01:45,439 --> 00:01:48,240 - Yes, yes, well some of our guests prefer 49 00:01:48,275 --> 00:01:50,876 morning and evening sheets. 50 00:01:50,911 --> 00:01:52,678 Uh, these are a little heavier, 51 00:01:52,713 --> 00:01:54,346 for sleeping, right? 52 00:01:54,381 --> 00:01:56,281 So if you don't mind, I'll just get to it. 53 00:01:56,316 --> 00:01:58,016 - I think we're good, I mean, 54 00:01:58,051 --> 00:02:00,018 we haven't even touched the sheets. 55 00:02:00,053 --> 00:02:01,653 - Oh, good, good, good! 56 00:02:01,688 --> 00:02:03,455 - Why is that good? 57 00:02:03,490 --> 00:02:06,024 - Well, it just means you're having a busy day, 58 00:02:06,059 --> 00:02:07,526 you know, up and at 'em. 59 00:02:07,561 --> 00:02:08,860 - Oh. - Right. 60 00:02:08,895 --> 00:02:10,228 - (Laughs) Right. 61 00:02:10,263 --> 00:02:11,730 And your hair's in a ponytail, 62 00:02:11,765 --> 00:02:12,998 that's fantastic. 63 00:02:13,033 --> 00:02:15,133 - Yeah... 64 00:02:15,168 --> 00:02:17,469 - And by that I mean it's very hot outside, 65 00:02:17,504 --> 00:02:20,906 and gives the neck a chance to breathe, 66 00:02:20,941 --> 00:02:22,574 um... yeah. 67 00:02:22,609 --> 00:02:24,142 So... 68 00:02:24,177 --> 00:02:26,478 - We're actually just on our way out so... 69 00:02:26,513 --> 00:02:28,480 - Oh well, good timing then, huh? 70 00:02:28,515 --> 00:02:31,183 - So why don't we follow you out, hmm? 71 00:02:31,218 --> 00:02:34,286 - So that's a yes to changing the sheets? 72 00:02:34,321 --> 00:02:36,722 - No, no, I think we're good. Thanks. 73 00:02:36,757 --> 00:02:38,256 - After you. 74 00:02:38,291 --> 00:02:40,759 - Oh, so leaving everything as is, then. 75 00:02:40,794 --> 00:02:42,060 Couple: Yeah! 76 00:02:44,464 --> 00:02:45,864 (Door creaks shut) 77 00:02:47,334 --> 00:02:49,401 (Bell on door jingles) 78 00:02:51,471 --> 00:02:55,273 - Hi, sorry I'm late, it's been a busy morning. 79 00:02:55,308 --> 00:02:57,342 (Sighs) How are you? 80 00:02:58,812 --> 00:03:00,712 - I'm fine, thank you. 81 00:03:00,747 --> 00:03:03,181 It's nice to see you. 82 00:03:03,216 --> 00:03:05,550 - Hm! Are you talking to me? 83 00:03:05,585 --> 00:03:08,620 I'm not used to that ah, level of kindness. 84 00:03:08,655 --> 00:03:10,922 - Yes, we haven't seen each other in weeks, 85 00:03:10,957 --> 00:03:13,392 so I was just saying it's nice to see you. 86 00:03:13,427 --> 00:03:15,327 - I'm going to ignore that passive aggression, 87 00:03:15,362 --> 00:03:17,396 and instead, lean in to the fact 88 00:03:17,431 --> 00:03:19,431 that we're both working professionals now, 89 00:03:19,466 --> 00:03:21,566 and Mama Oprah would be very proud of us. 90 00:03:21,601 --> 00:03:23,535 - Okay, that's one way to look at it. 91 00:03:23,570 --> 00:03:25,604 - Um, so you know what I think would be super fun, 92 00:03:25,639 --> 00:03:28,473 if we hung out at your place tonight. 93 00:03:28,508 --> 00:03:30,208 - My place? - Mhmm. 94 00:03:30,243 --> 00:03:31,610 - You've never been to my place. 95 00:03:31,645 --> 00:03:33,545 - Yeah exactly, you were just saying that we haven't 96 00:03:33,580 --> 00:03:35,013 been spending as much time together, 97 00:03:35,048 --> 00:03:36,748 and that it's been really bothering you. 98 00:03:36,783 --> 00:03:39,251 - I don't remember saying that last part. 99 00:03:39,286 --> 00:03:40,519 - Yeah, so I was just thinking like, 100 00:03:40,554 --> 00:03:42,387 what about a late night hang, 101 00:03:42,422 --> 00:03:44,623 or like, a platonic sleepover? 102 00:03:44,658 --> 00:03:46,892 - Mm... what's on your head? 103 00:03:46,927 --> 00:03:48,160 - Hm? A hat. 104 00:03:49,663 --> 00:03:52,330 That I'm test driving for the store. 105 00:03:52,365 --> 00:03:55,133 - I mean, what's happening under the hat? 106 00:03:56,703 --> 00:03:58,603 The other side. - Oh, I see. 107 00:03:58,638 --> 00:04:01,106 Yeah um, that would be a shower cap. 108 00:04:02,809 --> 00:04:05,410 - So this would have nothing to do with... 109 00:04:05,445 --> 00:04:08,013 the lice outbreak at the motel? 110 00:04:09,449 --> 00:04:11,049 Your dad just called me. 111 00:04:11,084 --> 00:04:12,818 - Mhm, um... 112 00:04:12,853 --> 00:04:15,187 so I might be taking preventative measures. 113 00:04:15,222 --> 00:04:18,657 I can't afford to have the store infested with lice. 114 00:04:18,692 --> 00:04:20,258 - I don't think it works that way, 115 00:04:20,293 --> 00:04:21,726 but just so we're clear, 116 00:04:21,761 --> 00:04:24,830 you were wanting to have a platonic sleepover 117 00:04:24,865 --> 00:04:27,532 at my place would have nothing to do with the fact 118 00:04:27,567 --> 00:04:29,501 that your sister has lice? 119 00:04:29,536 --> 00:04:31,837 - Yes, that is almost entirely correct. 120 00:04:31,872 --> 00:04:33,538 - Oh... 121 00:04:33,573 --> 00:04:36,174 Moira: Good morning! 122 00:04:38,145 --> 00:04:40,278 Bob: Who's gonna be the one to tell her? 123 00:04:40,313 --> 00:04:41,880 - I'll handle this. 124 00:04:41,915 --> 00:04:44,349 - Have I been let go? Should I leave? 125 00:04:44,384 --> 00:04:46,218 - No. - I won't make a scene. 126 00:04:46,253 --> 00:04:48,487 - You still have three and a half more years. 127 00:04:48,522 --> 00:04:50,655 - But who's counting? 128 00:04:50,690 --> 00:04:54,392 Roland: Moira, I know that town beautification 129 00:04:54,427 --> 00:04:55,794 is kind of your thing, 130 00:04:55,829 --> 00:04:58,497 so I know you'll wanna know that um... 131 00:04:58,532 --> 00:05:00,799 we're gonna build a flower garden. 132 00:05:00,834 --> 00:05:02,667 - And it gets better! 133 00:05:02,702 --> 00:05:04,503 - I imagine it must. 134 00:05:04,538 --> 00:05:06,771 - We're gonna name it after you. 135 00:05:08,441 --> 00:05:10,275 Oh, and look at that right there, 136 00:05:10,310 --> 00:05:12,611 utter shock! 137 00:05:12,646 --> 00:05:14,546 - Now, I'm flattered beyond all reason, 138 00:05:14,581 --> 00:05:16,181 but I can't help but think 139 00:05:16,216 --> 00:05:18,416 the money could be better spent elsewhere, 140 00:05:18,451 --> 00:05:20,652 making much needed improvements to the roads, 141 00:05:20,687 --> 00:05:23,388 the streetlamps, the parks, 142 00:05:23,423 --> 00:05:24,756 the sidewalks, the traffic light-- 143 00:05:24,791 --> 00:05:26,958 - Moira, I don't think you understand how rare it is 144 00:05:26,993 --> 00:05:29,628 for somebody to have something named for them in this town! 145 00:05:29,663 --> 00:05:31,963 I mean, yeah, the whole town is named after me, 146 00:05:31,998 --> 00:05:35,400 and Bob over here, he's got his bench. 147 00:05:35,435 --> 00:05:37,402 - Bob's Bench. 148 00:05:37,437 --> 00:05:39,538 - And Ronnie's got her rec centre. 149 00:05:39,573 --> 00:05:41,406 - It's an outdoor tennis court, 150 00:05:41,441 --> 00:05:43,708 and last year the net was stolen. 151 00:05:43,743 --> 00:05:45,710 - Well, she's kind of under selling it there, 152 00:05:45,745 --> 00:05:48,680 the rec centre is a major hook-up spot for the kids. 153 00:05:48,715 --> 00:05:50,949 - So is the bench. - Right. 154 00:05:50,984 --> 00:05:52,918 - As much as I would love to contribute 155 00:05:52,953 --> 00:05:54,853 to the population growth of this town 156 00:05:54,888 --> 00:05:57,088 by way of teen pregnancies, 157 00:05:57,123 --> 00:05:58,690 I must decline. 158 00:05:58,725 --> 00:06:00,825 - Honey, it's all about legacy! 159 00:06:00,860 --> 00:06:02,727 Your name will forever be associated 160 00:06:02,762 --> 00:06:04,629 with this town's name! 161 00:06:04,664 --> 00:06:06,765 - I don't think you're helping. 162 00:06:06,800 --> 00:06:09,501 - I truly appreciate the gesture. 163 00:06:09,536 --> 00:06:10,735 - Well look, before you say no-- 164 00:06:10,770 --> 00:06:12,704 - No. - Right. 165 00:06:12,739 --> 00:06:15,006 This is a really big deal, Moira. 166 00:06:16,509 --> 00:06:17,976 For us to be doing this for you. 167 00:06:18,011 --> 00:06:19,311 Okay. 168 00:06:21,114 --> 00:06:22,314 (Car rumbles) 169 00:06:29,089 --> 00:06:31,723 Ted: Alexis, I didn't think you were coming in today. 170 00:06:31,758 --> 00:06:34,125 - Oh um, I hadn't planned to, 171 00:06:34,160 --> 00:06:36,461 but it was really bugging me that your cupboards 172 00:06:36,496 --> 00:06:39,064 were so... disorganized. 173 00:06:39,099 --> 00:06:41,099 - It's Saturday. 174 00:06:41,134 --> 00:06:42,634 - No, I know. 175 00:06:42,669 --> 00:06:44,669 But the other reason is that 176 00:06:44,704 --> 00:06:46,605 I bumped into one of our clients, 177 00:06:46,640 --> 00:06:49,341 and her dog has lice, 178 00:06:49,376 --> 00:06:52,577 and she's worried that she now has lice. 179 00:06:52,612 --> 00:06:54,045 - Who was it? 180 00:06:54,080 --> 00:06:55,914 - Umm... 181 00:06:55,949 --> 00:06:58,149 Meredith? Meredith! 182 00:06:58,184 --> 00:07:00,485 She's new-ish, you might not remember her, 183 00:07:00,520 --> 00:07:04,556 just kind of like, mid-length, like wavy hair. 184 00:07:04,591 --> 00:07:08,526 - Does she want me to help her? - No. 185 00:07:08,561 --> 00:07:10,028 - No, she is too embarrassed. 186 00:07:10,063 --> 00:07:12,497 And I was like... Mere-dith, 187 00:07:12,532 --> 00:07:15,767 Meredith, there's no reason to be embarrassed, 188 00:07:15,802 --> 00:07:17,402 you're still exceptionally attractive, 189 00:07:17,437 --> 00:07:19,170 it's just lice, just get the shampoo, 190 00:07:19,205 --> 00:07:20,605 and deal with it! 191 00:07:20,640 --> 00:07:22,974 - Yeah okay um... the thing is, 192 00:07:23,009 --> 00:07:26,044 that you can't actually get lice from dogs. 193 00:07:26,079 --> 00:07:28,079 It's a different kind of lice. 194 00:07:28,114 --> 00:07:29,681 - Okay, so what should she use? 195 00:07:29,716 --> 00:07:31,483 Should she use the flea stuff, or-- 196 00:07:31,518 --> 00:07:33,818 - Oh no, she's fine to use the lice shampoo, 197 00:07:33,853 --> 00:07:36,921 but it's really more about combing them out. 198 00:07:36,956 --> 00:07:38,857 - Ewww! - On the upside, 199 00:07:38,892 --> 00:07:40,759 you could tell her that... 200 00:07:40,794 --> 00:07:42,227 they're only attracted to clean scalps, 201 00:07:42,262 --> 00:07:44,663 and she shouldn't be too embarrassed. 202 00:07:44,698 --> 00:07:46,431 Also, I'm kind of a samurai 203 00:07:46,466 --> 00:07:48,533 when it comes to a metal comb, so... 204 00:07:48,568 --> 00:07:50,669 - Okay, are you sure, because she didn't want to um, 205 00:07:50,704 --> 00:07:52,170 she didn't wanna bug you on a weekend. 206 00:07:52,205 --> 00:07:53,805 - Bug me. - (Sighs) 207 00:07:53,840 --> 00:07:55,373 - I am sure. 208 00:07:55,408 --> 00:07:57,776 - Okay, I will tell her. 209 00:07:57,811 --> 00:08:00,011 Um, you know that it's me, right? 210 00:08:00,046 --> 00:08:02,414 - Yeah, caught on pretty quick. - Okay, thank you. 211 00:08:02,449 --> 00:08:04,049 You're the sweetest little vet I've ever met. 212 00:08:04,084 --> 00:08:05,617 - I don't know about little, 213 00:08:05,652 --> 00:08:07,218 because I'm benching 225 right now, 214 00:08:07,253 --> 00:08:08,720 so it's not really something someone little-- 215 00:08:08,755 --> 00:08:10,255 - Aaah, Ted! - Okay, yep. 216 00:08:14,894 --> 00:08:16,328 - (Sighs) Okay, 217 00:08:16,363 --> 00:08:18,396 so if you wouldn't mind sorting these body milks by size, 218 00:08:18,431 --> 00:08:19,631 that would be great. 219 00:08:22,936 --> 00:08:24,669 - Can you drink these? 220 00:08:24,704 --> 00:08:26,838 - Um, it's liquid moisturizer, 221 00:08:26,873 --> 00:08:29,140 for your body, so no, 222 00:08:29,175 --> 00:08:30,942 you can't drink them. 223 00:08:32,312 --> 00:08:34,012 - Did you ask if you can drink it, too? 224 00:08:34,047 --> 00:08:37,015 - Okay, it says body milk on the label! 225 00:08:37,050 --> 00:08:39,084 - You know, I told David that the label 226 00:08:39,119 --> 00:08:41,052 was gonna be misleading, but he insisted. 227 00:08:41,087 --> 00:08:42,587 What was it you said? 228 00:08:42,622 --> 00:08:44,789 "Anyone with a fiber of common sense 229 00:08:44,824 --> 00:08:46,858 would know that it's not actually milk." 230 00:08:46,893 --> 00:08:48,927 - What do we think body milk is, 231 00:08:48,962 --> 00:08:52,530 if not milk for your body?! 232 00:08:52,565 --> 00:08:54,299 - Exactly. - Stevie, right? 233 00:08:54,334 --> 00:08:56,301 - Yeah. - I'm Patrick. 234 00:08:56,336 --> 00:08:57,802 I've heard a lot about you. 235 00:08:57,837 --> 00:08:59,204 - None of it is true. 236 00:08:59,239 --> 00:09:00,605 - Oh well, anyone with a fiber of common sense 237 00:09:00,640 --> 00:09:01,973 would know that. 238 00:09:02,008 --> 00:09:03,975 - I like him. 239 00:09:04,010 --> 00:09:05,543 I like you. 240 00:09:05,578 --> 00:09:07,245 - Okay, is this how this is gonna go? 241 00:09:07,280 --> 00:09:09,013 Because we have way too much work to do today 242 00:09:09,048 --> 00:09:10,882 for me to feel attacked by way 243 00:09:10,917 --> 00:09:12,984 of an imbalanced social dynamic. 244 00:09:13,019 --> 00:09:15,053 - Are-are you wearing a shower cap?! 245 00:09:15,088 --> 00:09:17,122 - Alexis has lice, 246 00:09:17,157 --> 00:09:19,257 and I am taking preventative measures. 247 00:09:19,292 --> 00:09:22,026 - By wearing one of our hats that we now can't sell. 248 00:09:22,061 --> 00:09:24,262 - Oh, he doesn't have it, I checked his head. 249 00:09:24,297 --> 00:09:27,098 I think the shower cap is more of a fashion choice 250 00:09:27,133 --> 00:09:29,334 at this point. - Uh huh. 251 00:09:29,369 --> 00:09:32,070 But you're living with somebody who does have lice, 252 00:09:32,105 --> 00:09:33,438 so just 'cause you don't have it now, 253 00:09:33,473 --> 00:09:34,973 doesn't mean that you couldn't get it tonight, 254 00:09:35,008 --> 00:09:36,975 or tomorrow, or whenever. 255 00:09:37,010 --> 00:09:38,843 - It's almost as if you want me to get the lice. 256 00:09:38,878 --> 00:09:40,211 - I don't want you to get it, 257 00:09:40,246 --> 00:09:41,713 I just, I think you should be careful. 258 00:09:41,748 --> 00:09:44,883 You can crash at my place tonight if you need to. 259 00:09:44,918 --> 00:09:46,384 - Thank you. 260 00:09:46,419 --> 00:09:48,787 But Stevie offered her place this morning. 261 00:09:48,822 --> 00:09:50,155 - Oh. - So... 262 00:09:50,190 --> 00:09:51,623 - Can I crash at your place? 263 00:09:51,658 --> 00:09:53,224 - (Laughs) 264 00:09:53,259 --> 00:09:54,926 - This is really fun for me. 265 00:09:54,961 --> 00:09:56,461 I'm having a lot of fun. 266 00:10:05,472 --> 00:10:07,739 - I never thought I'd see the day, John. 267 00:10:07,774 --> 00:10:10,475 You've been domesticated beyond recognition. 268 00:10:10,510 --> 00:10:13,511 - Moira, it's been a bit of a day here. 269 00:10:13,546 --> 00:10:15,079 - Well, this might lift your spirits, 270 00:10:15,114 --> 00:10:16,481 I just came from council, 271 00:10:16,516 --> 00:10:19,017 and they want to name a garden after me. 272 00:10:19,052 --> 00:10:21,019 - A garden? 273 00:10:21,054 --> 00:10:22,954 Oh, that's flattering. 274 00:10:24,457 --> 00:10:26,291 Another feather in your cap, huh? 275 00:10:26,326 --> 00:10:28,526 - Oh, I have enough legacies as it is, John. 276 00:10:28,561 --> 00:10:31,062 I've got that playhouse theatre in Pasadena, 277 00:10:31,097 --> 00:10:32,997 My titular scholarship with Phoenix, 278 00:10:33,032 --> 00:10:35,133 David and Alexis. 279 00:10:35,168 --> 00:10:37,368 - Yeah, but still, a garden is nice. 280 00:10:37,403 --> 00:10:40,104 You'd have to think twice about turning that down. 281 00:10:40,139 --> 00:10:41,940 - Oh, I've already turned it down. 282 00:10:41,975 --> 00:10:44,442 - Oh. 283 00:10:44,477 --> 00:10:46,744 Okay. 284 00:10:46,779 --> 00:10:48,279 Well, it's just... 285 00:10:50,650 --> 00:10:53,551 about a month ago I heard from the Lucy Albion Studio Theatre 286 00:10:53,586 --> 00:10:55,053 in Pasadena. 287 00:10:55,088 --> 00:10:56,654 - I don't know what that is. 288 00:10:56,689 --> 00:10:59,357 - It used to be called the Moira Rose-- 289 00:10:59,392 --> 00:11:01,559 - No, no! Don't say it! 290 00:11:02,896 --> 00:11:04,395 They've stripped the playhouse of my name? 291 00:11:04,430 --> 00:11:06,397 Who the fuck is Lucy Albion?! 292 00:11:06,432 --> 00:11:08,900 - A volunteer usher who died last year. 293 00:11:11,471 --> 00:11:13,071 - And when were you planning on telling me this, John?! 294 00:11:13,106 --> 00:11:15,240 - Well Moira, it's not like you have overreacted 295 00:11:15,275 --> 00:11:16,941 to bad news in the past. 296 00:11:16,976 --> 00:11:19,611 I just thought it might sit better with you 297 00:11:19,646 --> 00:11:21,546 once you'd heard about the garden. 298 00:11:23,349 --> 00:11:26,317 - No, I just told you about the garden. 299 00:11:26,352 --> 00:11:28,019 - Uh-huh. 300 00:11:29,522 --> 00:11:32,156 - John, did you ask Roland and Bob 301 00:11:32,191 --> 00:11:34,192 to name a garden after me? 302 00:11:34,227 --> 00:11:36,394 - No, no! 303 00:11:36,429 --> 00:11:39,297 They wanted to name the garden after you, Moira. 304 00:11:39,332 --> 00:11:42,367 After I offered to pay for the plaque, 305 00:11:42,402 --> 00:11:44,536 and a good chunk of the upkeep. 306 00:11:44,571 --> 00:11:46,104 - I don't believe this. 307 00:11:46,139 --> 00:11:48,540 - Sweetheart, I just thought having your own garden in town 308 00:11:48,575 --> 00:11:51,109 would make losing the theatre less painful! 309 00:11:51,144 --> 00:11:52,744 - Oh, I won't be pitied, John! 310 00:11:52,779 --> 00:11:55,113 Or fed your pacifying pablum like some kind of... 311 00:11:55,148 --> 00:11:57,181 soft-headed infant! 312 00:11:57,216 --> 00:11:58,516 - Well, I thought it was a nice gesture. 313 00:11:58,551 --> 00:12:00,385 - Oh no, no, now I just wonder what else 314 00:12:00,420 --> 00:12:01,886 you're keeping from me. 315 00:12:01,921 --> 00:12:03,154 - Nothing! 316 00:12:04,591 --> 00:12:06,558 Well, Alexis has lice. 317 00:12:06,593 --> 00:12:07,859 - What?! 318 00:12:07,894 --> 00:12:09,193 Ewwww! 319 00:12:09,228 --> 00:12:10,595 Ewwwww! 320 00:12:10,630 --> 00:12:12,430 I assume you shaved her head! 321 00:12:12,465 --> 00:12:13,898 And we have to put a wig on her. 322 00:12:13,933 --> 00:12:15,233 But not one of my wigs! 323 00:12:15,268 --> 00:12:17,268 These have to be boxed now! 324 00:12:17,303 --> 00:12:19,504 - Moira, I've got it all taken care of. 325 00:12:19,539 --> 00:12:21,706 And I'd think twice about that garden. 326 00:12:21,741 --> 00:12:23,708 - Oh, it's too late, the notion of that garden 327 00:12:23,743 --> 00:12:26,544 is as abhorrent to me as our daughter's scalp! 328 00:12:26,579 --> 00:12:28,880 - And I was worried about you overreacting. 329 00:12:28,915 --> 00:12:30,481 - (Screams) 330 00:12:33,720 --> 00:12:35,119 - Oh... 331 00:12:36,589 --> 00:12:38,489 - What are you doing in here? 332 00:12:38,524 --> 00:12:40,391 - Well, you said to change the sheets. 333 00:12:40,426 --> 00:12:42,460 - No, we said not to change the sheets. 334 00:12:42,495 --> 00:12:45,296 - Oh, you said not to change the sheets! 335 00:12:45,331 --> 00:12:49,067 I could've sworn I heard you say change the sheets. 336 00:12:49,102 --> 00:12:50,802 Well, while I'm here, I may as well-- 337 00:12:50,837 --> 00:12:53,338 - Please, just leave the bed. 338 00:12:53,373 --> 00:12:55,607 - Sure. - What's going on? 339 00:12:55,642 --> 00:12:57,408 - What's going on? 340 00:12:57,443 --> 00:12:59,911 Well, my- okay. 341 00:12:59,946 --> 00:13:03,681 My daughter and I were setting up the room earlier, 342 00:13:03,716 --> 00:13:05,850 and it turns out she has lice. 343 00:13:07,220 --> 00:13:09,621 I was changing the sheets because you know, 344 00:13:09,656 --> 00:13:11,923 I didn't wanna take a chance. - Been there. 345 00:13:11,958 --> 00:13:14,192 - Yeah, our six year old daughter had lice last year. 346 00:13:14,227 --> 00:13:15,727 How old's yours? 347 00:13:15,762 --> 00:13:17,762 - 28. 348 00:13:17,797 --> 00:13:20,264 - Oh, and I checked your hairbrush and it is fine. 349 00:13:20,299 --> 00:13:22,667 - You checked my hairbrush?! 350 00:13:22,702 --> 00:13:25,570 - It's a complimentary service. 351 00:13:27,340 --> 00:13:29,507 Ted: Why didn't you just tell me that you had lice? 352 00:13:29,542 --> 00:13:31,609 - Ted, a bug literally fell out of my head, 353 00:13:31,644 --> 00:13:33,511 onto my textbook this morning. 354 00:13:33,546 --> 00:13:35,513 It was so disgusting. 355 00:13:35,548 --> 00:13:36,814 Plus I didn't want you to picture me 356 00:13:36,849 --> 00:13:39,317 like some well-toned bug woman. 357 00:13:39,352 --> 00:13:41,586 - Well, I've seen worse. 358 00:13:41,621 --> 00:13:43,254 Fleas, ticks, worms. 359 00:13:44,857 --> 00:13:47,692 Granted, all of those were on house pets. 360 00:13:47,727 --> 00:13:49,894 - Ted! - I'm just saying, 361 00:13:49,929 --> 00:13:52,530 that you know, it could've been worse. 362 00:13:52,565 --> 00:13:54,365 I could be shearing you with trimmers right now. 363 00:13:56,469 --> 00:13:58,536 - You're really good at this. 364 00:13:58,571 --> 00:14:00,605 It reminds me of when I was in Bangkok. 365 00:14:00,640 --> 00:14:02,507 There was this amazing little Resto-Lounge 366 00:14:02,542 --> 00:14:04,509 that specialized in Tahitian food, 367 00:14:04,544 --> 00:14:06,577 and scalp massages. 368 00:14:06,612 --> 00:14:08,513 - I'm not sure what's more disgusting, 369 00:14:08,548 --> 00:14:10,448 what I'm doing right now, 370 00:14:10,483 --> 00:14:12,417 or the concept for that restaurant. 371 00:14:12,452 --> 00:14:14,318 - It was a Resto-Lounge. 372 00:14:14,353 --> 00:14:15,987 - Speaking of Thailand, 373 00:14:16,022 --> 00:14:17,955 I think is probably the most intimate thing 374 00:14:17,990 --> 00:14:20,558 I've ever done with an employee. 375 00:14:20,593 --> 00:14:23,027 - Speaking of Thailand, 376 00:14:23,062 --> 00:14:24,629 I think we've done a few more intimate things than this. 377 00:14:24,664 --> 00:14:27,565 - I meant while they were an employee. 378 00:14:27,600 --> 00:14:30,435 Not that I'd do this for anyone else. 379 00:14:30,470 --> 00:14:31,936 - Well, thank you. 380 00:14:31,971 --> 00:14:33,905 - Because it's actually pretty gross. 381 00:14:33,940 --> 00:14:35,573 - You said it wasn't that bad. 382 00:14:35,608 --> 00:14:37,575 - Well, there are some big ones in here. 383 00:14:37,610 --> 00:14:40,111 - Ewww! - I'm joking, I'm joking. 384 00:14:40,146 --> 00:14:41,512 Oh, maybe not. 385 00:14:41,547 --> 00:14:42,780 - Eww! - Nope, it's fine. 386 00:14:42,815 --> 00:14:44,682 It is fine, it's fine. 387 00:14:44,717 --> 00:14:46,884 Just-just the mama, we got her. 388 00:14:48,354 --> 00:14:49,787 (Knocking) 389 00:14:52,024 --> 00:14:54,959 - Hi, I can't thank you enough for inviting me. 390 00:14:54,994 --> 00:14:57,562 - Really you should be thanking yourself for that. 391 00:14:57,597 --> 00:14:58,963 - (Gasps) 392 00:14:58,998 --> 00:15:00,898 This is a lot nicer than I expected. 393 00:15:00,933 --> 00:15:02,834 For some reason I pictured you living underground. 394 00:15:02,869 --> 00:15:04,569 - In like, a bomb shelter? 395 00:15:04,604 --> 00:15:05,903 - Yeah like, bomb shelter aspects. 396 00:15:05,938 --> 00:15:07,705 Look at what you've done to this place! 397 00:15:07,740 --> 00:15:09,507 look at all this stuff! 398 00:15:09,542 --> 00:15:12,677 Look at that frame on the wall that you put there. 399 00:15:12,712 --> 00:15:14,779 Look at that Sarah McLachlan poster! 400 00:15:14,814 --> 00:15:16,481 - Don't be dissing Sarah McLachlan. 401 00:15:16,516 --> 00:15:17,815 - Who's dissing Sarah McLachlan? 402 00:15:17,850 --> 00:15:19,584 I followed Lilith Fair for two summers. 403 00:15:19,619 --> 00:15:21,953 (Sighs) - So-- 404 00:15:21,988 --> 00:15:23,454 - Uh-oh! 405 00:15:24,891 --> 00:15:27,325 Two toothbrushes? Hello! 406 00:15:27,360 --> 00:15:29,827 - No, you see, this is exactly why I shouldn'tve let you 407 00:15:29,862 --> 00:15:32,964 bully me into allowing you to stay here! 408 00:15:32,999 --> 00:15:34,699 - Do you require two toothbrushes? 409 00:15:34,734 --> 00:15:37,201 - Yes, I do. 410 00:15:40,273 --> 00:15:41,873 - Ahhh... 411 00:15:44,110 --> 00:15:46,811 - So maybe I was seeing somebody a while ago, 412 00:15:46,846 --> 00:15:50,181 and forgot to throw out his toothbrush. 413 00:15:50,216 --> 00:15:51,783 - I don't recall you ever telling me 414 00:15:51,818 --> 00:15:53,851 about that chapter of your life. 415 00:15:53,886 --> 00:15:55,253 - Well, I'm sure I would've told you, 416 00:15:55,288 --> 00:15:58,089 if you weren't so busy with the store. 417 00:15:58,124 --> 00:15:59,924 - I'm sorry, is that a soft, 418 00:15:59,959 --> 00:16:02,493 yet affirmative indication that you miss me? 419 00:16:02,528 --> 00:16:04,896 - No, it is not. 420 00:16:04,931 --> 00:16:06,798 - Because I agree, our social predicament 421 00:16:06,833 --> 00:16:08,666 is not ideal, 422 00:16:08,701 --> 00:16:11,736 but we are both thriving professionally, 423 00:16:11,771 --> 00:16:13,571 and I feel like that needs to be celebrated. 424 00:16:15,174 --> 00:16:17,608 Speaking of, where are the drinks? 425 00:16:17,643 --> 00:16:19,877 In this thing? - The fridge. 426 00:16:19,912 --> 00:16:22,013 - Is this- okay. - Just-- 427 00:16:23,382 --> 00:16:25,716 - Okay, I just see two de-shelled hard-boiled eggs 428 00:16:25,751 --> 00:16:27,585 in a bag, should I be scared for you? 429 00:16:27,620 --> 00:16:28,986 - The vodka's in the freezer. 430 00:16:29,021 --> 00:16:31,055 - Oh, in the freezer, okay. 431 00:16:31,090 --> 00:16:32,590 (Gasps) There she is! 432 00:16:34,093 --> 00:16:36,227 Look at that, look at her, go. 433 00:16:37,630 --> 00:16:39,130 What a gift. 434 00:16:40,666 --> 00:16:42,300 (Music plays softly) 435 00:16:43,870 --> 00:16:45,970 - Moira! - Oh, hi. 436 00:16:46,005 --> 00:16:47,405 - I just wanted to say congratulations 437 00:16:47,440 --> 00:16:49,106 about the garden. 438 00:16:49,141 --> 00:16:51,242 - Oh well, you're very kind, but I've declined the offer. 439 00:16:51,277 --> 00:16:53,244 - Oh, really? - Yes. 440 00:16:53,279 --> 00:16:54,846 As much as I love the spotlight, 441 00:16:54,881 --> 00:16:56,881 sometimes it's best to just step aside. 442 00:16:56,916 --> 00:16:58,616 - That's surprising. 443 00:16:58,651 --> 00:17:00,551 I know when they told me that they were gonna put my name 444 00:17:00,586 --> 00:17:03,020 on the new low-impact play centre at the school, 445 00:17:03,055 --> 00:17:05,089 I was thrilled! 446 00:17:05,124 --> 00:17:06,757 - Yes, it can be very exciting 447 00:17:06,792 --> 00:17:09,727 when the tribute matches the contribution. 448 00:17:09,762 --> 00:17:12,296 My name graced a theatre, 449 00:17:12,331 --> 00:17:15,233 a country club ladies' locker room, 450 00:17:15,268 --> 00:17:16,667 a roadway. 451 00:17:16,702 --> 00:17:18,669 - A whole road? 452 00:17:18,704 --> 00:17:20,137 - Oh, not just any road. 453 00:17:20,172 --> 00:17:22,306 This was a lifesaving road, 454 00:17:22,341 --> 00:17:24,976 dedicated to emergency vehicles. 455 00:17:25,011 --> 00:17:27,378 - Like a fire route? 456 00:17:27,413 --> 00:17:31,682 - Technically it was referred to as Evacuation Route 14, 457 00:17:31,717 --> 00:17:34,418 but those of us in the know affectionately called it... 458 00:17:34,453 --> 00:17:36,988 "Moira Rose Boulevard." 459 00:17:37,023 --> 00:17:38,723 - You know, Moira, 460 00:17:38,758 --> 00:17:40,858 having your name on a small, local garden 461 00:17:40,893 --> 00:17:42,293 wouldn't take away from 462 00:17:42,328 --> 00:17:44,996 any of those other amazing achievements. 463 00:17:45,031 --> 00:17:46,430 - You might think, 464 00:17:46,465 --> 00:17:48,332 but this little particular little tribute 465 00:17:48,367 --> 00:17:51,102 was bought by my husband, 466 00:17:51,137 --> 00:17:54,338 in an attempt to assuage my ego! 467 00:17:54,373 --> 00:17:58,409 - And that would be different from the other times because... 468 00:17:59,745 --> 00:18:02,179 - Well, I mean, of course philanthropy 469 00:18:02,214 --> 00:18:04,749 and recognition always go hand in hand, but... 470 00:18:04,784 --> 00:18:06,183 - Listen. 471 00:18:06,218 --> 00:18:07,752 I know this isn't what you wanted, 472 00:18:07,787 --> 00:18:10,021 but I think it would make Johnny really happy 473 00:18:10,056 --> 00:18:12,089 to make you happy. 474 00:18:12,124 --> 00:18:14,191 I mean, take Roland. 475 00:18:14,226 --> 00:18:16,494 Every year he buys me coconut macaroons, 476 00:18:16,529 --> 00:18:18,029 and I just don't have the heart to tell him 477 00:18:18,064 --> 00:18:20,398 I am really allergic to coconut. 478 00:18:20,433 --> 00:18:23,301 Yeah, every Valentine's Day I just rash right up. 479 00:18:23,336 --> 00:18:24,568 (Laughs) 480 00:18:24,603 --> 00:18:26,737 Last year my throat almost completely shut. 481 00:18:28,140 --> 00:18:29,573 (Crickets chirp) 482 00:18:33,479 --> 00:18:36,013 - I shouldn'tve eaten those eggs. 483 00:18:36,048 --> 00:18:37,915 - I can't believe I'm trapped under a blanket with you 484 00:18:37,950 --> 00:18:39,784 knowing you ate those eggs. 485 00:18:39,819 --> 00:18:41,919 - (Sighs) 486 00:18:41,954 --> 00:18:44,322 - I bet Patrick's fridge is fully stocked. 487 00:18:44,357 --> 00:18:45,790 - What does that mean?! 488 00:18:45,825 --> 00:18:48,359 - It means he's got his life together. 489 00:18:48,394 --> 00:18:50,962 He's a pretty eligible bachelor. 490 00:18:50,997 --> 00:18:52,897 Patrick. 491 00:18:52,932 --> 00:18:54,598 - I suppose. 492 00:18:58,204 --> 00:19:00,371 What? He's my business partner. 493 00:19:00,406 --> 00:19:02,606 - Oh, aren't they all. 494 00:19:02,641 --> 00:19:04,475 - What are you doing? 495 00:19:04,510 --> 00:19:08,212 - What, you guys just seem to really get along well. 496 00:19:08,247 --> 00:19:10,448 - Yeah, because we're in business together, 497 00:19:10,483 --> 00:19:12,950 and compliment each other professionally. 498 00:19:12,985 --> 00:19:16,520 - Hm, but he offered for you to stay over at his place. 499 00:19:16,555 --> 00:19:19,256 - Yes, because unlike you and I, 500 00:19:19,291 --> 00:19:21,325 he's extremely generous, 501 00:19:21,360 --> 00:19:24,228 and has absolutely no ulterior motive. 502 00:19:24,263 --> 00:19:26,263 - Then why are you here and not there? 503 00:19:26,298 --> 00:19:28,199 - Because you asked me first. 504 00:19:28,234 --> 00:19:30,067 - I didn't, though. 505 00:19:30,102 --> 00:19:31,602 - And it would be weird. 506 00:19:31,637 --> 00:19:33,804 - Well, if nothing's going on, why would it be weird? 507 00:19:33,839 --> 00:19:36,307 - Because we're in business together, 508 00:19:36,342 --> 00:19:39,377 and I don't know what his preferences are. 509 00:19:39,412 --> 00:19:40,745 - Well, you're not gonna find out 510 00:19:40,780 --> 00:19:42,546 what his preferences are on a sleepover with me. 511 00:19:42,581 --> 00:19:44,482 - Well, I wouldn't be sharing a bed with him, 512 00:19:44,517 --> 00:19:46,384 I'd be in some guest bedroom. 513 00:19:46,419 --> 00:19:48,686 - Guest bedroom, what is he, Bill Gates? 514 00:19:48,721 --> 00:19:51,455 - Yes, he's Bill Gates. 515 00:19:52,892 --> 00:19:54,225 - I like this for you. 516 00:19:54,260 --> 00:19:55,559 - Like what? There's nothing to like. 517 00:19:55,594 --> 00:19:57,061 - You seem flustered. 518 00:19:57,096 --> 00:19:58,429 - I'm not flus-- 519 00:19:58,464 --> 00:20:00,097 maybe it's the eggs. 520 00:20:02,201 --> 00:20:03,734 Both: Ughh! 521 00:20:05,204 --> 00:20:07,471 - Um, am I reading this right? 522 00:20:07,506 --> 00:20:10,341 - "The Moira's Rose's Garden." 523 00:20:10,376 --> 00:20:12,309 - Okay look, I went back and forth on the name 524 00:20:12,344 --> 00:20:14,178 a couple of times, and I may have... 525 00:20:14,213 --> 00:20:16,647 confused the engraver. 526 00:20:16,682 --> 00:20:19,717 - The Moira's Rose's Garden. 527 00:20:19,752 --> 00:20:24,789 So the garden is dedicated to a rose that Moira owns? 528 00:20:26,659 --> 00:20:28,993 - I don't think that there are enough apostrophes. 529 00:20:29,028 --> 00:20:31,462 - I don't even see a rose in the garden. 530 00:20:31,497 --> 00:20:33,264 - Because there aren't any roses. 531 00:20:33,299 --> 00:20:34,665 - Or are we the Roses? 532 00:20:34,700 --> 00:20:36,333 - Okay, I'm getting roses for the garden, 533 00:20:36,368 --> 00:20:37,902 I'm-I'm getting roses. 534 00:20:37,937 --> 00:20:39,336 - Oh... okay. 535 00:20:39,371 --> 00:20:41,572 And what are these numbers for? 536 00:20:41,607 --> 00:20:43,307 - That's mom's birthday, David. 537 00:20:43,342 --> 00:20:44,675 - Those are the last four digits 538 00:20:44,710 --> 00:20:46,410 of your father's credit card. 539 00:20:46,445 --> 00:20:48,379 - It was a complicated order form, all right? 540 00:20:48,414 --> 00:20:51,115 There were a lot of fields to fill in. 541 00:20:51,150 --> 00:20:54,552 - Um, I hope you got a really good deal on this. 542 00:20:54,587 --> 00:20:56,353 - It's by the letter, so he paid extra 543 00:20:56,388 --> 00:20:58,222 for those apostrophe "S's." 544 00:20:58,257 --> 00:20:59,623 - Okay, enough, enough. 545 00:20:59,658 --> 00:21:01,926 This is still a very big honor for your mother. 546 00:21:01,961 --> 00:21:03,227 Is it not? 547 00:21:03,262 --> 00:21:05,129 - Mhm... - Yes? 548 00:21:06,699 --> 00:21:07,965 - Mhm. 549 00:21:09,401 --> 00:21:11,335 - So when we die, 550 00:21:11,370 --> 00:21:13,170 are we all gonna be buried here?