1 00:00:02,045 --> 00:00:04,352 A POP Original Series 2 00:00:05,614 --> 00:00:07,224 [Birds chirp, car rumbles] 3 00:00:07,268 --> 00:00:08,921 - David, what time is Patrick's housewarming tonight? 4 00:00:08,965 --> 00:00:10,184 - Hmm, you'll have to ask him. 5 00:00:10,227 --> 00:00:12,142 He told me he doesn't want my help, 6 00:00:12,186 --> 00:00:14,318 so I'm just gonna play the supportive partner, 7 00:00:14,362 --> 00:00:15,841 and watch him fail. 8 00:00:15,885 --> 00:00:17,800 - Okay, it's just that if Ted and I are gonna be 9 00:00:17,843 --> 00:00:20,150 fashionably late, we need to know when it starts. 10 00:00:20,194 --> 00:00:23,588 Jocelyn: There you are, Alexis! [Laughs] 11 00:00:23,632 --> 00:00:25,895 - Good morning, Roses. - Jocelyn, Roland. 12 00:00:25,938 --> 00:00:29,377 - Look at you, positively flushed with motherly glow. 13 00:00:29,420 --> 00:00:32,249 - We've just been running around looking for Alexis. 14 00:00:32,293 --> 00:00:33,685 - That's so sweet; what's up? 15 00:00:33,729 --> 00:00:35,078 - Remember that time that you told me 16 00:00:35,122 --> 00:00:37,776 you'd be there for me if I ever needed you? 17 00:00:37,820 --> 00:00:39,430 - I don't think that was me. 18 00:00:39,474 --> 00:00:42,129 - Well, our babysitter for tonight just cancelled on us, 19 00:00:42,172 --> 00:00:44,218 and we were gonna have dinner, 20 00:00:44,261 --> 00:00:46,437 and uh, a couples massage. 21 00:00:46,481 --> 00:00:49,005 But unfortunately, the couple that massages us 22 00:00:49,049 --> 00:00:51,225 can only do it once a month, so... 23 00:00:51,268 --> 00:00:53,053 - Hmm, no. Um... 24 00:00:53,096 --> 00:00:54,576 well, I totally would think about it, 25 00:00:54,619 --> 00:00:56,926 but I have a housewarming thing tonight. 26 00:00:56,969 --> 00:00:58,710 Jocelyn and Roland: Ohhh... 27 00:01:01,104 --> 00:01:02,758 - David? 28 00:01:02,801 --> 00:01:05,326 Is Patrick also going to that housewarming party? 29 00:01:05,369 --> 00:01:08,285 - Patrick's throwing the party, unfortunately. 30 00:01:08,329 --> 00:01:10,244 - Well Rollie, we're just gonna have to cancel. 31 00:01:10,287 --> 00:01:12,550 Because we have asked literally everyone. 32 00:01:12,594 --> 00:01:14,596 - [Groans] Oh, jeez. 33 00:01:14,639 --> 00:01:16,250 - Thanks anyways, Roses. 34 00:01:16,293 --> 00:01:18,078 [Roland groans] Moira: Sorry. 35 00:01:20,689 --> 00:01:22,691 - Well, that was weird. 36 00:01:22,734 --> 00:01:24,736 - Seriously. A nighttime couples massage, 37 00:01:24,780 --> 00:01:27,174 what is this, 1985?! 38 00:01:27,217 --> 00:01:30,264 - No! They asked everyone at the table except us, 39 00:01:30,307 --> 00:01:31,961 we're sitting right here! 40 00:01:32,004 --> 00:01:34,006 - They're not going to ask someone of your age, John. 41 00:01:34,050 --> 00:01:36,792 - We raised two kids. 42 00:01:36,835 --> 00:01:38,750 - "Raised" might be a stretch. 43 00:01:38,794 --> 00:01:41,362 Our nursery was in a different wing of the house. 44 00:01:41,405 --> 00:01:43,146 - It was a design flaw. - I'm a light sleeper. 45 00:01:46,367 --> 00:01:50,762 ♪♪♪ 46 00:01:53,200 --> 00:01:54,810 - John, you're not still working on that 47 00:01:54,853 --> 00:01:56,725 cumbersome laundry hamper? 48 00:01:56,768 --> 00:01:58,901 - I told you, it's a playpen, Moira. 49 00:01:58,944 --> 00:02:00,424 - I was hoping you were joking. 50 00:02:00,468 --> 00:02:02,948 - No. After Roland and Jocelyn's 51 00:02:02,992 --> 00:02:04,515 little oversight this morning, 52 00:02:04,559 --> 00:02:07,910 I took it upon myself to offer our services. 53 00:02:07,953 --> 00:02:10,434 - Why in God's name would you do that?! 54 00:02:10,478 --> 00:02:12,480 - It's a principle thing. 55 00:02:12,523 --> 00:02:15,700 Roland and Jocelyn don't think we can take care of a kid. 56 00:02:15,744 --> 00:02:19,051 - That's an argument I'm willing to lose. 57 00:02:19,095 --> 00:02:21,402 So now I have go to Ronnie's by myself. 58 00:02:21,445 --> 00:02:23,099 - What? 59 00:02:23,143 --> 00:02:24,448 - I told you, the Lifetime Network 60 00:02:24,492 --> 00:02:26,755 is re-airing the movie I did with Joyce DeWitt. 61 00:02:26,798 --> 00:02:29,279 Remember? "Not Without My Cousin." 62 00:02:29,323 --> 00:02:30,846 And Ronnie's TV gets that channel, 63 00:02:30,889 --> 00:02:32,064 I told you this, John! 64 00:02:32,108 --> 00:02:33,892 Or at least I'm telling you now. 65 00:02:33,936 --> 00:02:37,418 - Okay, well then, have fun. 66 00:02:37,461 --> 00:02:39,115 I'm more than capable 67 00:02:39,159 --> 00:02:41,117 of looking after this kid myself. 68 00:02:41,161 --> 00:02:43,206 - John, my sweet husband. 69 00:02:43,250 --> 00:02:45,948 We have nothing to prove as parents. 70 00:02:45,991 --> 00:02:47,515 We did our best for our children. 71 00:02:47,558 --> 00:02:49,256 - Yeah, we were there most weeknights. 72 00:02:49,299 --> 00:02:51,301 For at least a couple of hours. 73 00:02:51,345 --> 00:02:52,694 - Unless we were out for the evening. 74 00:02:52,737 --> 00:02:54,130 - Yeah, or jetting around. 75 00:02:54,174 --> 00:02:56,088 - Or if it was a really long day. 76 00:02:56,132 --> 00:02:57,873 - Yeah, no, no, I'm not the least bit concerned, Moira. 77 00:02:57,916 --> 00:02:59,309 [Knocking] 78 00:02:59,353 --> 00:03:02,182 Besides, if Roland can look after a baby, 79 00:03:02,225 --> 00:03:03,183 anyone can. 80 00:03:05,837 --> 00:03:07,317 - Hey, Jocelyn. 81 00:03:07,361 --> 00:03:09,014 Jocelyn: Hi, Johnny. Roland: Hi, Johnny. 82 00:03:09,058 --> 00:03:10,625 Jocelyn: Thank you so much, Johnny, 83 00:03:10,668 --> 00:03:12,975 it just would've never occurred to us to ask you. 84 00:03:13,018 --> 00:03:15,064 Are you sure you're up for this? 85 00:03:15,107 --> 00:03:16,761 - Oh, he'll be fine, honey, 86 00:03:16,805 --> 00:03:20,025 And if he does find himself completely lost, 87 00:03:20,069 --> 00:03:21,810 and believe me, he will, 88 00:03:21,853 --> 00:03:23,899 he will have... 89 00:03:23,942 --> 00:03:25,814 the baby binder to hold his hand. 90 00:03:25,857 --> 00:03:27,468 Right here, Johnny. 91 00:03:27,511 --> 00:03:30,035 - Okay, well, here goes nothing. 92 00:03:30,079 --> 00:03:31,472 - Yeah. - I don't know why, I'm just... 93 00:03:31,515 --> 00:03:33,343 I'm having a hard time letting go. 94 00:03:33,387 --> 00:03:35,215 - I've got him. I've got him, Jocelyn. 95 00:03:35,258 --> 00:03:36,694 - Oh, okay, okay. - Well, I know why. 96 00:03:36,738 --> 00:03:38,479 It's because you don't trust the guy, and believe me, 97 00:03:38,522 --> 00:03:40,089 I don't either, but we're in this now, so... 98 00:03:40,132 --> 00:03:42,091 try not think about it. - Okay... 99 00:03:42,134 --> 00:03:44,267 - Wow, Moira. 100 00:03:44,311 --> 00:03:47,139 Looking so elegant for a night of babysitting. 101 00:03:47,183 --> 00:03:50,491 Just dressed to the nines in choking hazards. 102 00:03:50,534 --> 00:03:53,842 - Sadly, Jocelyn, I won't be here this evening to intercede. 103 00:03:53,885 --> 00:03:56,018 - Oh wow, so it's just gonna be Johnny, 104 00:03:56,061 --> 00:03:58,020 alone with our precious miracle baby? 105 00:03:58,063 --> 00:04:00,152 - Uh... honey, 106 00:04:00,196 --> 00:04:02,329 come on, we're gonna be late for our massage. 107 00:04:02,372 --> 00:04:04,331 You know Ron and Linda like to do those stretches 108 00:04:04,374 --> 00:04:07,159 before they get us on the table, so... 109 00:04:07,203 --> 00:04:09,379 I'll be thinking about all of you during my massage. 110 00:04:09,423 --> 00:04:11,512 - No, no need for that, Roland. 111 00:04:11,555 --> 00:04:13,775 - Okay Johnny, just don't do anything I wouldn't do. 112 00:04:13,818 --> 00:04:14,993 Jocelyn: Love you! 113 00:04:15,037 --> 00:04:16,734 - What? - Whoop! Whoop! 114 00:04:16,778 --> 00:04:17,735 [Door slams] 115 00:04:17,779 --> 00:04:19,781 Boop boop be boop! 116 00:04:19,824 --> 00:04:21,043 [Bird caws] 117 00:04:23,524 --> 00:04:24,829 - [Sighs] 118 00:04:26,353 --> 00:04:28,572 [Sighs heavily] 119 00:04:28,616 --> 00:04:30,400 Wow. What are those? 120 00:04:30,444 --> 00:04:32,228 - These are party shots. 121 00:04:32,272 --> 00:04:34,622 - Hmm... - You ever had one before? 122 00:04:34,665 --> 00:04:37,538 - No, nope. 123 00:04:37,581 --> 00:04:39,191 - Fine, once. 124 00:04:39,235 --> 00:04:41,324 Twice. 125 00:04:41,368 --> 00:04:42,847 Fine, I had a tray in Cancun. 126 00:04:42,891 --> 00:04:45,633 - Okay, well they kinda go with my overall theme 127 00:04:45,676 --> 00:04:48,418 of a good old-fashioned high school slumber party, so. 128 00:04:48,462 --> 00:04:50,725 - Mhmm, I still don't know why you were so quick 129 00:04:50,768 --> 00:04:52,640 to dismiss my theme idea. 130 00:04:52,683 --> 00:04:54,250 - Where is anybody gonna find 131 00:04:54,294 --> 00:04:56,948 glass-blown Venetian masks around here? 132 00:04:56,992 --> 00:04:58,123 Besides, people are kind of excited 133 00:04:58,167 --> 00:05:00,387 about the high school idea. 134 00:05:00,430 --> 00:05:03,477 - Okay. Walk me through the high school idea. 135 00:05:03,520 --> 00:05:05,914 Models and teen actors are just gonna lounge around 136 00:05:05,957 --> 00:05:07,829 in their bras and thongs, 137 00:05:07,872 --> 00:05:09,918 and take Polaroids of themselves all night? 138 00:05:09,961 --> 00:05:12,355 - What was your high school experience like? 139 00:05:12,399 --> 00:05:14,096 - What was yours like? 140 00:05:14,139 --> 00:05:15,924 Besides, where are we going to find a salad bowl of E 141 00:05:15,967 --> 00:05:17,447 this last minute? 142 00:05:17,491 --> 00:05:20,145 - You know, I think this could be kind of a... 143 00:05:20,189 --> 00:05:22,713 a fun opportunity for you to 144 00:05:22,757 --> 00:05:24,324 - Mhmm. 145 00:05:24,367 --> 00:05:25,716 It's just that my parents have spent like, 146 00:05:25,760 --> 00:05:27,327 an astounding amount of money on therapy 147 00:05:27,370 --> 00:05:29,154 to try to do that already. 148 00:05:29,198 --> 00:05:31,940 So forgive me for not wanting to run back into the fire. 149 00:05:31,983 --> 00:05:34,508 - What happened to you? 150 00:05:34,551 --> 00:05:36,031 - Nothing, really, I just didn't like it. 151 00:05:36,074 --> 00:05:37,685 - [Gasps] 152 00:05:37,728 --> 00:05:39,556 - Mm. Okay. Oh. - Yeah. 153 00:05:39,600 --> 00:05:40,731 - [Slurps] 154 00:05:44,344 --> 00:05:45,693 You might have to make more of those. 155 00:05:45,736 --> 00:05:47,477 - That's right. - That's very nice. 156 00:05:47,521 --> 00:05:49,044 [Dog barks] 157 00:05:49,087 --> 00:05:50,741 [Keys jingle] 158 00:05:50,785 --> 00:05:52,917 [Ted sighs] 159 00:05:56,704 --> 00:05:57,792 [Keys jingle] 160 00:05:59,924 --> 00:06:02,840 - Honey, I'm home. 161 00:06:02,884 --> 00:06:05,321 - Oh, shouldn't I be the one saying that? 162 00:06:05,365 --> 00:06:06,627 - A little something to celebrate 163 00:06:06,670 --> 00:06:09,194 the end of the week. 164 00:06:09,238 --> 00:06:11,632 - Yeah... - Whoop! 165 00:06:11,675 --> 00:06:14,069 - Uh, except it's Neuterpalooza week at work, 166 00:06:14,112 --> 00:06:15,810 and I still have two days 167 00:06:15,853 --> 00:06:17,464 of spaying and neutering ahead of me. 168 00:06:17,507 --> 00:06:19,117 - Oh, let's stop saying "neutering", 169 00:06:19,161 --> 00:06:20,554 'cause it's killing my buzz! 170 00:06:20,597 --> 00:06:22,251 - This is so silky. 171 00:06:22,294 --> 00:06:24,122 - Yeah, it's my dad's housecoat from storage. 172 00:06:24,166 --> 00:06:26,864 I was thinking we could go as Hef, r.i.p., 173 00:06:26,908 --> 00:06:28,562 and a Playboy Bunny. 174 00:06:28,605 --> 00:06:30,955 - Isn't the theme high school slumber party? 175 00:06:30,999 --> 00:06:32,914 - It is. 176 00:06:32,957 --> 00:06:34,437 My best friend, Summer, used to date Hef in high school, 177 00:06:34,481 --> 00:06:35,525 which isn't as weird as it sounds, 178 00:06:35,569 --> 00:06:38,485 'cause he was like, a very young 77. 179 00:06:38,528 --> 00:06:40,791 - Uh okay, don't be mad, but-- 180 00:06:40,835 --> 00:06:42,532 - Ted, no! 181 00:06:42,576 --> 00:06:43,881 - I have to perform surgery on people's pets like, 182 00:06:43,925 --> 00:06:45,317 first thing in the morning. 183 00:06:45,361 --> 00:06:47,102 - Why'd you have to pick this weekend? 184 00:06:47,145 --> 00:06:48,233 You know how much I always look forward 185 00:06:48,277 --> 00:06:49,887 to Patrick's house parties. 186 00:06:49,931 --> 00:06:52,324 - Isn't this his first one? 187 00:06:52,368 --> 00:06:53,587 - Okay, fine. 188 00:06:53,630 --> 00:06:56,328 I guess I'll just finish my drink, and... 189 00:06:56,372 --> 00:06:58,200 wander over there dressed like this, 190 00:06:58,243 --> 00:07:00,463 and see what happens. 191 00:07:00,507 --> 00:07:02,770 - Well, I mean, 192 00:07:02,813 --> 00:07:05,816 maybe you don't need to leave just yet. 193 00:07:07,122 --> 00:07:09,124 - Snip, snip, Mr. Mullens! 194 00:07:10,778 --> 00:07:13,955 I was just hoping you could make an exception. 195 00:07:13,998 --> 00:07:15,435 Let loose for one night. 196 00:07:15,478 --> 00:07:17,219 - Next time. I promise. 197 00:07:19,003 --> 00:07:20,396 [Crickets chirp] 198 00:07:20,440 --> 00:07:21,832 Moira: Well, I'm off. [Baby cries] 199 00:07:21,876 --> 00:07:23,704 - All right, have fun, sweetheart. 200 00:07:23,747 --> 00:07:25,967 - You realize the bebe is crying. 201 00:07:26,010 --> 00:07:27,664 - I do, yes. 202 00:07:27,708 --> 00:07:29,492 - Isn't it scheduled to be dormant by now? 203 00:07:29,536 --> 00:07:31,233 - I'll figure it out, Moira. 204 00:07:31,276 --> 00:07:33,104 - You have the binder. - Yes. 205 00:07:33,148 --> 00:07:35,542 - Yes. - Ooh! 206 00:07:35,585 --> 00:07:37,631 - I think I just found the issue. 207 00:07:37,674 --> 00:07:39,371 It might be in the diaper. 208 00:07:39,415 --> 00:07:42,200 - Oh, it was the bebe. I'm so relieved! 209 00:07:42,244 --> 00:07:44,028 - Yeah, I think they left extra diapers. 210 00:07:44,072 --> 00:07:45,465 They assumed we'd take care of it. 211 00:07:45,508 --> 00:07:47,249 You wanna grab the rubber gloves? 212 00:07:47,292 --> 00:07:49,251 - They're Tom Ford, John, no! 213 00:07:49,294 --> 00:07:50,600 And they wouldn't fit you anyway. 214 00:07:50,644 --> 00:07:52,428 - The cleaning gloves under the sink! 215 00:07:52,472 --> 00:07:54,038 - Oh! Yes. 216 00:07:55,823 --> 00:07:57,781 [Baby wails] 217 00:07:57,825 --> 00:07:59,391 - [Groans] 218 00:08:00,915 --> 00:08:02,699 And, there. 219 00:08:02,743 --> 00:08:04,266 Oh, it looks like Jocelyn's 220 00:08:04,309 --> 00:08:06,529 left you some nice chapter tabs. 221 00:08:08,096 --> 00:08:10,533 Uh, it's saying here that you should... 222 00:08:10,577 --> 00:08:13,884 wipe counter-clockwise direction, ah... 223 00:08:15,146 --> 00:08:17,671 flip it, if you can flip it. 224 00:08:17,714 --> 00:08:20,369 - The baby? - It doesn't say. 225 00:08:20,412 --> 00:08:22,763 - Honestly, Moira, just go! I'll be fine. 226 00:08:22,806 --> 00:08:24,982 - I'm not sure you will be, John. 227 00:08:25,026 --> 00:08:27,724 It's not like the old days when we could just call Adelina, 228 00:08:27,768 --> 00:08:30,335 and have her rush home from her daughter's wedding. 229 00:08:30,379 --> 00:08:31,902 - You're gonna miss your screening. 230 00:08:31,946 --> 00:08:33,904 - I'll go after the first commercial break. 231 00:08:33,948 --> 00:08:35,558 That's when the action happens anyway, 232 00:08:35,602 --> 00:08:37,386 when my cousin and I begin 233 00:08:37,429 --> 00:08:39,301 our backpack through Lebanon. 234 00:08:39,344 --> 00:08:41,477 - What else does the binder say? 235 00:08:41,521 --> 00:08:42,870 - Oh my God, John! 236 00:08:42,913 --> 00:08:45,916 Don't forget to wash its hands! 237 00:08:45,960 --> 00:08:48,005 - Okay. 238 00:08:48,049 --> 00:08:49,398 [Dog barks] 239 00:08:49,441 --> 00:08:51,487 - Okay, my turn. Ahem! 240 00:08:53,358 --> 00:08:55,926 Hmm, never have I ever pretended to be 241 00:08:55,970 --> 00:08:58,363 a pizza delivery person so I could get 242 00:08:58,407 --> 00:09:01,018 into Jared Leto's Halloween party. 243 00:09:01,062 --> 00:09:02,672 - You're a bitch. 244 00:09:02,716 --> 00:09:05,588 - My mom was engaged to two pizza delivery guys. 245 00:09:05,632 --> 00:09:08,199 Can that count? 'Cause I am really thirsty. 246 00:09:08,243 --> 00:09:10,071 - Stevie! 247 00:09:10,114 --> 00:09:11,072 - Uh, um... 248 00:09:14,118 --> 00:09:15,816 Never have I ever... 249 00:09:19,646 --> 00:09:20,908 Sorry, I'm just trying to think of something 250 00:09:20,951 --> 00:09:22,910 I haven't done. - Okay. 251 00:09:22,953 --> 00:09:24,781 How long did you envision this game going on for? 252 00:09:24,825 --> 00:09:26,827 Because never have I ever been so bored. 253 00:09:26,870 --> 00:09:29,046 - Aw, I'm sorry, David, when I suggested the game, 254 00:09:29,090 --> 00:09:31,483 I didn't expect that you'd be drinking quite so much. 255 00:09:31,527 --> 00:09:32,920 Eating out of the garbage? 256 00:09:32,963 --> 00:09:34,878 - Okay, I did that in front of you last night. 257 00:09:34,922 --> 00:09:37,707 Now, as a participant, if we don't change the game soon, 258 00:09:37,751 --> 00:09:39,796 I'm gonna get very drunk. - Oh. 259 00:09:39,840 --> 00:09:41,581 [Knocking] Yep? 260 00:09:43,147 --> 00:09:45,236 - Hey! [Laughing] All: Oh! There he is! Yay! 261 00:09:45,280 --> 00:09:47,325 - God, what are you doing here? 262 00:09:47,369 --> 00:09:49,023 - Hey, sweetie. 263 00:09:49,066 --> 00:09:50,459 You were right, we deserve a night out. 264 00:09:50,502 --> 00:09:52,417 So, I just pushed all my morning appointments. 265 00:09:52,461 --> 00:09:54,158 Which will be fine, I guess, 266 00:09:54,202 --> 00:09:56,117 it just means that I'll be staying up 'til 1:00 A.M. 267 00:09:56,160 --> 00:09:58,510 on a Saturday, spaying with a pretty shaky hand. 268 00:09:58,554 --> 00:10:00,425 - Mm, that's so cute. What can I get you to drink? 269 00:10:00,469 --> 00:10:02,079 - Oh no, don't worry about that. 270 00:10:02,123 --> 00:10:03,733 After you used all of my booze for your punch, 271 00:10:03,777 --> 00:10:05,692 the only alcohol left in my fridge 272 00:10:05,735 --> 00:10:08,303 was a few of your rum, raspberry, coconut coolers. 273 00:10:08,346 --> 00:10:10,348 So I polished them off, and... 274 00:10:10,392 --> 00:10:11,915 it tasted like burnt plastic, and I regretted it instantly. 275 00:10:11,959 --> 00:10:13,351 Woman: Hi, Ted! 276 00:10:13,395 --> 00:10:14,962 - Only you would wear a little robe, 277 00:10:15,005 --> 00:10:18,008 and little slippers to a high school slumber party. 278 00:10:18,052 --> 00:10:19,749 - Oh, no, no, no. This is just so that I didn't get cold 279 00:10:19,793 --> 00:10:21,403 on the way over. 280 00:10:21,446 --> 00:10:23,187 All right! [Partygoers cheer] 281 00:10:23,231 --> 00:10:24,928 What is the game, because I'm up! 282 00:10:24,972 --> 00:10:26,582 - Ohh! Wow. 283 00:10:26,626 --> 00:10:27,583 - Oh! - Okay... 284 00:10:27,627 --> 00:10:29,759 Ted: Twyla! 285 00:10:29,803 --> 00:10:31,761 - I'm not sure if it's just the punch, but... 286 00:10:31,805 --> 00:10:34,155 he could get it! 287 00:10:34,198 --> 00:10:36,592 - Stevie, that's disgu 288 00:10:36,636 --> 00:10:38,550 Ted, can I get you a party shot? 289 00:10:38,594 --> 00:10:40,509 - Cool! - Okay. 290 00:10:40,552 --> 00:10:42,467 - David? - Wow. 291 00:10:42,511 --> 00:10:43,904 - Yeah. - We have orange-- 292 00:10:43,947 --> 00:10:46,167 - I'll take that. - yellow... 293 00:10:46,210 --> 00:10:47,429 [Blows a kiss] 294 00:10:51,172 --> 00:10:52,695 [Music plays, party chatter] 295 00:10:57,265 --> 00:10:59,659 - Hey! Do you wanna put Emir away for a hot sec, 296 00:10:59,702 --> 00:11:02,531 so this game can keep going, and the party can end soon? 297 00:11:02,574 --> 00:11:04,228 - Oh, I'm good. I don't wanna kiss anyone here. 298 00:11:04,272 --> 00:11:05,752 - My sister's sitting in the circle, 299 00:11:05,795 --> 00:11:07,318 You think I'm dying to play? 300 00:11:07,362 --> 00:11:08,668 Thank you very much. 301 00:11:09,930 --> 00:11:12,019 - [Sighs] 302 00:11:12,062 --> 00:11:14,064 [Alexis claps] 303 00:11:14,108 --> 00:11:15,675 - [Gasps] 304 00:11:16,893 --> 00:11:19,026 - Ohh! 305 00:11:19,069 --> 00:11:20,505 [Gasps] Oh! 306 00:11:22,769 --> 00:11:24,640 [Laughs] Okay! 307 00:11:27,251 --> 00:11:29,036 Babe, did you rig this? 308 00:11:29,079 --> 00:11:32,039 - Maybe I did, and maybe I did! 309 00:11:32,082 --> 00:11:33,649 - Ooh! [Laughs] 310 00:11:33,693 --> 00:11:36,130 Okay, go crazy, babe. - Mhmm. 311 00:11:36,173 --> 00:11:38,045 All right, who's the lucky lady? 312 00:11:40,351 --> 00:11:43,790 - That's offensive. - Okay, anyway, re-spin! 313 00:11:43,833 --> 00:11:45,705 - Yeah, it actually looks like it sorta landed 314 00:11:45,748 --> 00:11:47,315 between two people. - No, no, no, no! 315 00:11:47,358 --> 00:11:48,664 I know exactly who it landed on. 316 00:11:48,708 --> 00:11:50,100 - Oh, Ted! That's not okay. 317 00:11:50,144 --> 00:11:51,841 Man, come here, big guy! 318 00:11:51,885 --> 00:11:53,060 - Mmmph! Partygoers: [Shocked gasps] 319 00:11:53,103 --> 00:11:54,714 - Muah! [Laughs] 320 00:11:54,757 --> 00:11:57,238 - Oh my fucken God. 321 00:11:57,281 --> 00:11:59,022 [Partygoers laugh] 322 00:11:59,066 --> 00:12:00,937 - It looks like the punch needs a refill. 323 00:12:00,981 --> 00:12:02,809 - Oh hey, I could use a refill too, big guy. 324 00:12:02,852 --> 00:12:04,636 - Okay, I don't know where "big guy" is coming from, 325 00:12:04,680 --> 00:12:06,421 but it needs to stop. 326 00:12:06,464 --> 00:12:10,294 - Um, I don't know about you, but I smell drama. 327 00:12:10,338 --> 00:12:12,427 Twyla: Okay, my turn! 328 00:12:12,470 --> 00:12:14,603 Moira: [In movie] You know Helen, despite everything... 329 00:12:14,646 --> 00:12:16,344 - Oh, if it weren't for Joyce Dewitt 330 00:12:16,387 --> 00:12:18,520 insisting on wearing those pigtails, 331 00:12:18,563 --> 00:12:21,653 this movie could've been a hit! 332 00:12:21,697 --> 00:12:23,568 We're supposed to be astrophysicists, 333 00:12:23,612 --> 00:12:24,744 it just takes you out of it. 334 00:12:24,787 --> 00:12:28,225 And yet, she, she gets the close up! 335 00:12:28,269 --> 00:12:30,793 - Well, that was shocking. - I know, right? 336 00:12:30,837 --> 00:12:32,795 And I get the aerial shot for my love scene. 337 00:12:32,839 --> 00:12:34,797 - No, no, I'm talking about the kid. 338 00:12:34,841 --> 00:12:36,538 To think this little thing could... 339 00:12:36,581 --> 00:12:39,019 create so much destruction. 340 00:12:39,062 --> 00:12:41,586 - Oh, you've completed the diaper substitution. 341 00:12:41,630 --> 00:12:44,807 Aren't you the Sephardic Mr. Clean! 342 00:12:44,851 --> 00:12:49,029 - Well, I did the kid, but I'm not doing the bathroom. 343 00:12:49,072 --> 00:12:50,813 - It appears you may need a change yourself, Mr. Rose. 344 00:12:50,857 --> 00:12:52,989 What is that on your shoulder? 345 00:12:53,816 --> 00:12:55,513 - Oh Moira, he spit up on me. 346 00:12:55,557 --> 00:12:57,341 [Baby gurgles] 347 00:12:57,385 --> 00:12:59,213 And he's spit up in the playpen! 348 00:12:59,256 --> 00:13:02,433 - Ew! That cannot be good, John! 349 00:13:02,477 --> 00:13:05,480 Its body is ejecting things, what did you do to it?! 350 00:13:05,523 --> 00:13:08,439 - Nothing! I-I changed his diaper, that's all. 351 00:13:08,483 --> 00:13:10,833 - Well, perhaps you've swaddled its abdomen too tightly, 352 00:13:10,877 --> 00:13:13,531 Or maybe it's allergic to something. 353 00:13:13,575 --> 00:13:15,664 John, did you feed it shellfish? 354 00:13:15,707 --> 00:13:17,492 What did you do?! 355 00:13:17,535 --> 00:13:19,668 - I've gotta wipe him up, and change his clothes again. 356 00:13:19,711 --> 00:13:22,323 - For all we know, it's got crawling pneumonia. 357 00:13:22,366 --> 00:13:24,847 - Oh, he doesn't have crawling pneumonia, Moira! 358 00:13:24,891 --> 00:13:26,414 - I don't want to say I told you so, 359 00:13:26,457 --> 00:13:28,155 but this is an infelicitous burden. 360 00:13:28,198 --> 00:13:30,026 I could be at Ronnie's right now, 361 00:13:30,070 --> 00:13:32,202 preparing for the post-screening Q&A. 362 00:13:32,246 --> 00:13:34,291 - Well then, go to Ronnie's! 363 00:13:34,335 --> 00:13:36,903 Because I've gotta get him a change of clothes. 364 00:13:36,946 --> 00:13:38,730 - Well, at least put the gloves back on. 365 00:13:41,255 --> 00:13:42,734 John, it says right here, 366 00:13:42,778 --> 00:13:46,651 spitting up is normal. 367 00:13:46,695 --> 00:13:49,872 Jocelyn's written, "Spit happens." 368 00:13:49,916 --> 00:13:51,874 Very clever. 369 00:13:51,918 --> 00:13:53,920 For Jocelyn. 370 00:13:53,963 --> 00:13:55,922 [Moira's talks in movie] 371 00:13:55,965 --> 00:13:58,228 Partygoers: [Grunting noises] 372 00:13:58,272 --> 00:13:59,751 - Oh my God, they just need to chill. 373 00:13:59,795 --> 00:14:01,231 David: Okay, I'm done. 374 00:14:01,275 --> 00:14:02,798 - Who chose this theme, anyway? 375 00:14:02,842 --> 00:14:05,061 - It was a mistake. 376 00:14:05,105 --> 00:14:07,455 - [Sighs] What are you guys doing over here? 377 00:14:07,498 --> 00:14:09,326 You remind me of me at a high school house party 378 00:14:09,370 --> 00:14:11,024 judging all the attractive and popular kids 379 00:14:11,067 --> 00:14:13,026 for being attractive and popular. 380 00:14:13,069 --> 00:14:14,679 - David, do you have anything you wanna say 381 00:14:14,723 --> 00:14:15,985 to me and Patrick? - Actually, yes. 382 00:14:16,029 --> 00:14:19,162 Now, as an attractive and popular kid 383 00:14:19,206 --> 00:14:21,382 at a house party, I can confidently say, 384 00:14:21,425 --> 00:14:23,950 it's very fun. - That's it? 385 00:14:23,993 --> 00:14:25,777 That's all you have to say? 386 00:14:25,821 --> 00:14:27,127 - What's going on here? 387 00:14:27,170 --> 00:14:28,911 - Mm, things got effed, 388 00:14:28,955 --> 00:14:30,957 and we're not having fun anymore. 389 00:14:31,000 --> 00:14:33,350 - For what it's worth, I'm having a great time. 390 00:14:33,394 --> 00:14:34,917 - You're like a tsetse fly. 391 00:14:34,961 --> 00:14:36,701 Where's your cell phone boyfriend? 392 00:14:36,745 --> 00:14:38,921 - On my cell phone. - Okay. 393 00:14:38,965 --> 00:14:40,270 - You're not having fun? 394 00:14:40,314 --> 00:14:42,969 - I don't know David, sure. 395 00:14:43,012 --> 00:14:44,884 - What exactly did I do wrong here? 396 00:14:44,927 --> 00:14:46,842 - Oh, I don't know. David, 397 00:14:46,886 --> 00:14:48,800 mmm, was it the time you kissed my boyfriend? 398 00:14:48,844 --> 00:14:52,282 Or... was it the time you kissed my boyfriend? 399 00:14:52,326 --> 00:14:53,762 - I think it was the time you kissed her boyfriend. 400 00:14:53,805 --> 00:14:56,286 - Okay, he kissed me! 401 00:14:56,330 --> 00:14:58,027 And I was just told to have some fun. 402 00:14:58,071 --> 00:15:00,029 So I played the game. 403 00:15:00,073 --> 00:15:01,901 I'm sorry that the bottle landed on me. 404 00:15:01,944 --> 00:15:03,685 - Hm, technically it landed between you and Stevie, so. 405 00:15:03,728 --> 00:15:05,556 - Yeah. 406 00:15:05,600 --> 00:15:06,949 - Okay, so you're upset about this as well, then? 407 00:15:06,993 --> 00:15:08,298 - Looks like it. Patrick: No, I'm not! 408 00:15:08,342 --> 00:15:10,213 I'm not upset. I just, I guess I wonder 409 00:15:10,257 --> 00:15:12,694 how you would react if the tables were turned. 410 00:15:12,737 --> 00:15:14,087 - Yeah David, like, what would you do 411 00:15:14,130 --> 00:15:16,263 if Patrick and I suddenly kissed at a party? 412 00:15:16,306 --> 00:15:17,829 - Yeah. - Or Patrick and me. 413 00:15:17,873 --> 00:15:19,919 - Okay, we're done with you. 414 00:15:19,962 --> 00:15:21,398 It was spin the bottle! 415 00:15:21,442 --> 00:15:24,184 If Patrick was wasted, and spun the bottle, 416 00:15:24,227 --> 00:15:26,273 and it landed on you, and you guys kissed, 417 00:15:26,316 --> 00:15:28,928 I wouldn't care. - You're lying, David. 418 00:15:28,971 --> 00:15:30,320 - Okay, is that what needs to happen 419 00:15:30,364 --> 00:15:32,757 to clear the air here? You guys need to kiss? 420 00:15:32,801 --> 00:15:34,150 - David, let's not be dramatic. - Yeah, maybe it does. 421 00:15:34,194 --> 00:15:35,804 - What? - Well, by all means. 422 00:15:35,847 --> 00:15:37,719 - I think it's actually more the principle of the thing-- 423 00:15:37,762 --> 00:15:39,155 - Okay, here we go. - Hmm! 424 00:15:43,159 --> 00:15:44,987 - [Sighs] - Is that really... 425 00:15:45,031 --> 00:15:48,164 - Uh huh. 426 00:15:48,208 --> 00:15:50,340 Mmm! Mmmm! 427 00:15:50,384 --> 00:15:52,516 [Smooching sounds] 428 00:15:52,560 --> 00:15:54,736 Mmmmmmmm! 429 00:15:54,779 --> 00:15:57,173 Yum. That was fun. 430 00:15:57,217 --> 00:15:59,436 - Hey, are we spinning more bottles? 431 00:15:59,480 --> 00:16:01,003 - Uh, was that fun for you guys? 432 00:16:01,047 --> 00:16:04,093 That like, satisfying? - I was never not okay. So. 433 00:16:04,137 --> 00:16:06,748 - It was really good for me. 434 00:16:06,791 --> 00:16:08,054 - I say we play truth or dare. 435 00:16:08,097 --> 00:16:09,664 - Oh Stevie, I'm in! 436 00:16:09,707 --> 00:16:11,883 - Oh no, Ted. 437 00:16:11,927 --> 00:16:12,884 Get your housecoat and your other slipper. 438 00:16:12,928 --> 00:16:15,670 It is time to go. 439 00:16:15,713 --> 00:16:17,541 - You got it, big guy. - Okay. 440 00:16:17,585 --> 00:16:19,674 - Okay. Sorry. I'm sorry. 441 00:16:19,717 --> 00:16:21,328 Good game! 442 00:16:21,371 --> 00:16:23,765 [Crickets chirp] 443 00:16:23,808 --> 00:16:26,246 - Look at him. 444 00:16:26,289 --> 00:16:29,989 Awful peaceful when he's sleeping. 445 00:16:30,032 --> 00:16:30,946 [Moira talks in movie] 446 00:16:33,688 --> 00:16:36,256 Well, we did it, sweetheart. 447 00:16:36,299 --> 00:16:38,954 And, uh... 448 00:16:38,998 --> 00:16:41,261 what do you think we've learned here today? 449 00:16:41,304 --> 00:16:44,655 - That Adelina was grossly underpaid. 450 00:16:44,699 --> 00:16:47,702 - No, I mean, we could've been good, 451 00:16:47,745 --> 00:16:49,921 hands-on parents if we wanted to. 452 00:16:49,965 --> 00:16:51,662 We've got it in us. 453 00:16:51,706 --> 00:16:53,795 - That was never in question, John. 454 00:16:53,838 --> 00:16:55,971 I'm even more convinced that our hands-off approach 455 00:16:56,015 --> 00:16:57,755 served them better. 456 00:16:57,799 --> 00:17:00,802 Moira: [In movie] I'll go, but not without my cousin! 457 00:17:00,845 --> 00:17:02,978 That had its moments. 458 00:17:03,022 --> 00:17:05,894 When it shone, it shone brightly. 459 00:17:05,937 --> 00:17:08,070 And I have to hand it to DeWitt. 460 00:17:08,114 --> 00:17:11,160 She had a real breakthrough during the denouement. 461 00:17:11,204 --> 00:17:13,858 I believe she believed we were cousins. 462 00:17:15,034 --> 00:17:16,470 [Soft knocking] 463 00:17:16,513 --> 00:17:18,385 John? - [Snoring] 464 00:17:19,821 --> 00:17:21,649 [Light taps] [TV shuts off] 465 00:17:27,220 --> 00:17:29,048 Roland: Oh, hello! Moira: Shh! Shh! Shh! 466 00:17:29,091 --> 00:17:31,311 - Greet-- what?! - Shh! 467 00:17:31,354 --> 00:17:33,443 - What? - I just put him down! 468 00:17:33,487 --> 00:17:36,098 - Oh my gosh, you got little Roland Jr. to sleep? 469 00:17:36,142 --> 00:17:37,230 - Oh no, I'm talking about John. 470 00:17:37,273 --> 00:17:38,840 - Oh. 471 00:17:38,883 --> 00:17:40,668 - No, Roland's been asleep for quite some time. 472 00:17:40,711 --> 00:17:42,931 - And everything was fine? No major problems? 473 00:17:42,974 --> 00:17:46,326 - He is a slice of meringue, Jocelyn. 474 00:17:46,369 --> 00:17:48,850 - You know, I don't know if uh... 475 00:17:48,893 --> 00:17:51,331 I'm just all zen'd out from an hour and a half 476 00:17:51,374 --> 00:17:53,942 of Linda's magic fingers on me, 477 00:17:53,985 --> 00:17:55,683 but I can actually see myself leaving Roland Jr. 478 00:17:55,726 --> 00:17:58,164 with you people more often. 479 00:17:58,207 --> 00:18:00,688 - Ah! 480 00:18:00,731 --> 00:18:02,342 Well, that something Linda might want to massage 481 00:18:02,385 --> 00:18:04,779 right out of your mind, the next appointment. 482 00:18:04,822 --> 00:18:06,259 - I actually have Ron the next time, 483 00:18:06,302 --> 00:18:10,132 we like to mix it up a little bit. 484 00:18:10,176 --> 00:18:11,699 - And with that, I believe your little inchling 485 00:18:11,742 --> 00:18:14,615 is out past its curfew. 486 00:18:14,658 --> 00:18:16,182 - Oh, you get the binger, I'll get the baby. 487 00:18:16,225 --> 00:18:19,141 - Okay. 488 00:18:19,185 --> 00:18:21,012 Ohh, jeez. 489 00:18:21,056 --> 00:18:23,014 Look at him. 490 00:18:23,058 --> 00:18:25,234 You know, I almost think I like him better asleep than awake. 491 00:18:31,371 --> 00:18:34,765 [Johnny grunts] - He's on my side. 492 00:18:34,809 --> 00:18:35,940 Bye bye. 493 00:18:38,160 --> 00:18:39,814 [Door slams] - What? 494 00:18:39,857 --> 00:18:41,772 - Oh, shh! 495 00:18:43,687 --> 00:18:46,473 [Garbage bag rustles] 496 00:18:49,911 --> 00:18:51,695 [Garbage clatters] 497 00:18:51,739 --> 00:18:52,827 - Ahem! I'm just gonna take the garbage out. 498 00:18:52,870 --> 00:18:54,437 - Okay. 499 00:18:54,481 --> 00:18:55,830 - Yeah, and if I don't come back, 500 00:18:55,873 --> 00:18:58,049 it's probably because I've run off with Ted. 501 00:18:58,093 --> 00:18:59,834 - Thanks for the heads up. 502 00:18:59,877 --> 00:19:01,183 - We're just gonna go for a ride, 503 00:19:01,227 --> 00:19:02,706 see where it takes us. 504 00:19:02,750 --> 00:19:04,839 Maybe start a vet clinic somewhere along the way. 505 00:19:04,882 --> 00:19:07,058 He'll the animals back to heath, I'll... 506 00:19:07,102 --> 00:19:08,930 offer grooming services. 507 00:19:08,973 --> 00:19:10,323 - Okay, you know what? 508 00:19:13,021 --> 00:19:15,632 Maybe I overreacted for a second. 509 00:19:15,676 --> 00:19:17,939 I was just talking to Alexis, 510 00:19:17,982 --> 00:19:19,419 and we sorta wound each other worked up. 511 00:19:19,462 --> 00:19:21,160 Abd Stevie didn't help. - Stevie never helps. 512 00:19:21,203 --> 00:19:23,727 - So I didn't love seeing my boyfriend 513 00:19:23,771 --> 00:19:26,165 kissing some other guy. 514 00:19:26,208 --> 00:19:29,168 - I'm sorry, are you saying you were jealous? 515 00:19:29,211 --> 00:19:31,300 - David, I'm not playing this game with you. 516 00:19:31,344 --> 00:19:32,954 - No, you just said you didn't like 517 00:19:32,997 --> 00:19:35,043 seeing your boyfriend kissing another guy. 518 00:19:35,086 --> 00:19:36,958 - Okay, fine. He's a handsome guy. 519 00:19:37,001 --> 00:19:38,351 I might've been a little jealous. 520 00:19:38,394 --> 00:19:39,700 - So, you think he's handsome then? 521 00:19:39,743 --> 00:19:42,181 - What? [Sighs] He's like-he goes to the gym. 522 00:19:42,224 --> 00:19:44,183 - Goes to the gym? - Oh my God. 523 00:19:44,226 --> 00:19:46,620 - Wow, okay, so when you said you were jealous, 524 00:19:46,663 --> 00:19:48,839 were you saying you were jealous of him, 525 00:19:48,883 --> 00:19:50,711 or jealous of me? 526 00:19:50,754 --> 00:19:53,801 Because I thought you were saying you were jealous of him. 527 00:19:53,844 --> 00:19:55,324 - Both? 528 00:19:55,368 --> 00:19:56,804 - Not the answer I was looking for. 529 00:19:56,847 --> 00:19:59,154 - Hey. 530 00:19:59,198 --> 00:20:00,634 - Mhmm? 531 00:20:00,677 --> 00:20:01,852 - I wonder what would've happened 532 00:20:01,896 --> 00:20:04,551 if we had met in high school. - Hmm. 533 00:20:04,594 --> 00:20:07,641 Well, unless you were into candy ravers 534 00:20:07,684 --> 00:20:09,382 with asymmetrical haircuts 535 00:20:09,425 --> 00:20:11,384 and a lot of pacifier necklaces, 536 00:20:11,427 --> 00:20:12,863 I think our paths crossed at the right time. 537 00:20:18,129 --> 00:20:19,261 How jealous, though? 538 00:20:19,305 --> 00:20:21,263 - Why don't you take out the garbage? 539 00:20:21,307 --> 00:20:23,265 - How jealous were you? - Nope! 540 00:20:23,309 --> 00:20:25,441 - Scale of one to ten. 541 00:20:25,485 --> 00:20:28,139 Like, enraged, or... - Bye, bye. 542 00:20:28,183 --> 00:20:29,402 - like fuming, did you sweat? 543 00:20:32,622 --> 00:20:35,103 - That was fun. - Yep. 544 00:20:35,146 --> 00:20:36,800 - That was really fun. Did you have fun? 545 00:20:36,844 --> 00:20:38,367 - Yes. 546 00:20:38,411 --> 00:20:40,804 - Did everyone had fun? - Yes, Ted. 547 00:20:40,848 --> 00:20:44,025 - That's good, it's good that everyone had fun. 548 00:20:44,068 --> 00:20:45,505 - Okay, you still have your slippers on, 549 00:20:45,548 --> 00:20:47,115 - Yeah, I know, sometimes my feet get really cold 550 00:20:47,158 --> 00:20:49,509 when I drink too much. - It's not a thing. 551 00:20:49,552 --> 00:20:51,511 - Okay, well, gimme a kiss. - No! 552 00:20:51,554 --> 00:20:53,469 You kissed my brother tonight, 553 00:20:53,513 --> 00:20:55,428 I'm not kissing you after you kissed my brother. 554 00:20:55,471 --> 00:20:58,300 - Pffft! Who kissed your brother? 555 00:20:58,344 --> 00:21:01,172 - Okay, it's time for "Fun Ted" to just pass out. 556 00:21:01,216 --> 00:21:03,479 - No, he's not even tired. In fact, if anything, 557 00:21:03,523 --> 00:21:06,090 I'd say he's only becoming more fun. 558 00:21:06,134 --> 00:21:07,744 - Okay. Okay! Okay! Okay! 559 00:21:07,788 --> 00:21:11,531 I think we should just like, sleep it off. 560 00:21:11,574 --> 00:21:13,707 - Okay, okay, okay. Yeah, yeah. 561 00:21:13,750 --> 00:21:15,796 But first just give your brother a kiss. 562 00:21:15,839 --> 00:21:17,188 - Ew, Ted, Ew! - Come on. 563 00:21:17,232 --> 00:21:19,974 - Ew! Ew! Ew! Ew! Ew! 564 00:21:20,017 --> 00:21:22,368 - Ew! Ew! Ew! Ew! That's you.