1 00:00:02,045 --> 00:00:04,352 A POP Original Series 2 00:00:05,266 --> 00:00:06,441 [Both laughing] 3 00:00:06,484 --> 00:00:08,225 - [Snort] Stop, oh my God! 4 00:00:08,269 --> 00:00:10,358 - Oh! 5 00:00:10,401 --> 00:00:12,534 You must be having a lovely morning. 6 00:00:12,577 --> 00:00:13,752 - Hey now, it's just getting started. 7 00:00:13,796 --> 00:00:15,493 - Is it just getting started? 8 00:00:15,537 --> 00:00:17,104 Because it looks like the two of you have been engaged 9 00:00:17,147 --> 00:00:19,715 in general merriment for quite some time now. 10 00:00:19,758 --> 00:00:21,934 - Did he just say "merriment?" - I think he did. 11 00:00:21,978 --> 00:00:23,936 - Yes, I said "merriment." 12 00:00:23,980 --> 00:00:25,590 Because that's what happens when I spend too much time 13 00:00:25,634 --> 00:00:29,072 with my mother, and I blame you two for it. 14 00:00:29,116 --> 00:00:30,682 - So how was uh, dinner last night? 15 00:00:30,726 --> 00:00:32,902 - Ooh, long. We spent two and a half hours 16 00:00:32,945 --> 00:00:35,600 going over a costume lineup for the show. 17 00:00:35,644 --> 00:00:37,515 All so that you two of you could sneak off 18 00:00:37,559 --> 00:00:39,691 to some secret dance rehearsal behind her back 19 00:00:39,735 --> 00:00:41,563 like a pair of dirty con artists. 20 00:00:41,606 --> 00:00:44,522 - Hey listen, David, your Mom is a great director. 21 00:00:44,566 --> 00:00:46,698 She's just not used to working with amateur dancers. 22 00:00:46,742 --> 00:00:48,135 - Yeah, last week she told me 23 00:00:48,178 --> 00:00:52,182 to dance like an Indonesian scarf caught in the wind. 24 00:00:52,226 --> 00:00:54,141 I don't even know what that looks like. 25 00:00:54,184 --> 00:00:55,707 - This "Money" number is so complicated 26 00:00:55,751 --> 00:00:58,145 that if we don't get the outside help, 27 00:00:58,188 --> 00:01:00,103 we will be laughed off stage. You've seen me dance. 28 00:01:00,147 --> 00:01:01,670 - Yes, you have legs like tree trunks, 29 00:01:01,713 --> 00:01:04,064 we knew that going into this. - Thank you. 30 00:01:04,107 --> 00:01:07,284 - Can we just have one more private session with Derek, 31 00:01:07,328 --> 00:01:09,373 and then it's done. - One more session?! 32 00:01:09,417 --> 00:01:11,375 I thought last night was the last session! 33 00:01:11,419 --> 00:01:12,985 - Well, we couldn't nail the final lift. 34 00:01:13,029 --> 00:01:14,726 - What is this, "Dirty Dancing?!" 35 00:01:14,770 --> 00:01:17,642 - David, please, just keep her distracted for one more night. 36 00:01:18,948 --> 00:01:21,429 - No. No! It's too much! 37 00:01:21,472 --> 00:01:23,431 - Okay, then I guess we can just... 38 00:01:23,474 --> 00:01:25,215 tell her we're getting outside help. 39 00:01:25,259 --> 00:01:27,043 - Mm, good luck. 40 00:01:27,087 --> 00:01:29,480 When she was coaching me for the "Little Mister" pageant, 41 00:01:29,524 --> 00:01:31,874 I made the mistake of going to Mario Lopez for advice, 42 00:01:31,917 --> 00:01:33,528 he was the hosting at the time. 43 00:01:33,571 --> 00:01:36,096 Anyway, she found out, and felt so betrayed, 44 00:01:36,139 --> 00:01:38,446 she "forgot" to double-knot my tap shoes, 45 00:01:38,489 --> 00:01:40,187 and cost me the crown. 46 00:01:40,230 --> 00:01:43,407 So I will cover for you for one more night. 47 00:01:43,451 --> 00:01:44,887 But that is it! 48 00:01:46,062 --> 00:01:47,890 This better be worth it. 49 00:01:47,933 --> 00:01:49,631 Excuse me, I have a job to do. - Oh. 50 00:01:49,674 --> 00:01:53,852 ♪♪♪ 51 00:01:55,071 --> 00:01:56,855 [Birds chirp, dog barks] 52 00:01:59,728 --> 00:02:01,730 - Mm, Ted, it smells so good in here! 53 00:02:01,773 --> 00:02:03,166 What's the occasion? 54 00:02:03,210 --> 00:02:05,429 - Brunch. That we were supposed to make together. 55 00:02:05,473 --> 00:02:07,431 - Oh, don't worry, babe, I've already eaten. 56 00:02:07,475 --> 00:02:09,172 - So then I guess I'll just have your plate 57 00:02:09,216 --> 00:02:11,174 for dinner, then. - Mm, yum! 58 00:02:11,218 --> 00:02:13,916 - Hey, so I was thinking about maybe going into work 59 00:02:13,959 --> 00:02:16,048 a little bit later today. 60 00:02:16,092 --> 00:02:19,356 - Yay, if that means more Teddy time for me, then yes. 61 00:02:19,400 --> 00:02:22,142 - No actually, I've been thinking about maybe 62 00:02:22,185 --> 00:02:25,536 taking a longer break from work. 63 00:02:25,580 --> 00:02:27,408 - I'm listening. 64 00:02:27,451 --> 00:02:30,193 - What if we got out of town, just the two of us? 65 00:02:30,237 --> 00:02:32,674 - Like Thelma and Louise? - Nope. 66 00:02:32,717 --> 00:02:35,285 Uh no, I was thinking somewhere more exotic, like, 67 00:02:35,329 --> 00:02:37,157 I don't know, somewhere that would have beaches for you, 68 00:02:37,200 --> 00:02:39,246 and some interesting wildlife for me? 69 00:02:39,289 --> 00:02:41,813 - Okay, I've just been to Miami so many times before, 70 00:02:41,857 --> 00:02:44,599 and trust me, the "wildlife" is not as sexy up close. 71 00:02:44,642 --> 00:02:46,340 - No, I'm talking about farther away. 72 00:02:46,383 --> 00:02:48,603 Like, I don't know... 73 00:02:48,646 --> 00:02:51,214 the Galapagos Islands. 74 00:02:51,258 --> 00:02:53,347 - I love that. - Really? 75 00:02:53,390 --> 00:02:55,566 - Yes, as a jumping-off point, yes! 76 00:02:55,610 --> 00:02:57,394 But if we're thinking islands, why don't we do something 77 00:02:57,438 --> 00:03:00,615 less sleepy and scary, like, The Maldives? 78 00:03:00,658 --> 00:03:02,138 - Definitely something to consider. 79 00:03:02,182 --> 00:03:05,359 And I guess while we're spit-balling here, 80 00:03:05,402 --> 00:03:06,925 you know, it could be kinda fun to go somewhere 81 00:03:06,969 --> 00:03:08,666 that you've never been before. 82 00:03:08,710 --> 00:03:11,930 Like, I don't know, the Galapagos Islands. 83 00:03:11,974 --> 00:03:14,368 - Yes, Ted! An island somewhere for sure. 84 00:03:14,411 --> 00:03:17,675 We just need to figure out where. 85 00:03:17,719 --> 00:03:19,851 But I'm so glad we're on the same page about this! 86 00:03:19,895 --> 00:03:21,331 - Yeah, yeah. 87 00:03:21,375 --> 00:03:23,159 And-And what page is that? 88 00:03:23,203 --> 00:03:25,596 - Well, we both agree that we wanna get away, 89 00:03:25,640 --> 00:03:26,771 and we both agree that we're gonna land 90 00:03:26,815 --> 00:03:29,339 on somewhere so good. 91 00:03:31,254 --> 00:03:32,734 Mhmm! 92 00:03:35,519 --> 00:03:37,826 Roland: Hey, Johnny. I heard the news. 93 00:03:37,869 --> 00:03:39,741 Boy, we are really going to miss Moira tonight 94 00:03:39,784 --> 00:03:41,308 at the annual Mayor's Roast. 95 00:03:41,351 --> 00:03:43,571 I was looking forward to getting scorched. 96 00:03:43,614 --> 00:03:45,790 - Oh yeah, well, she's gonna miss it, too. 97 00:03:45,834 --> 00:03:47,531 - Yeah, I mean, when she starts going off, 98 00:03:47,575 --> 00:03:50,795 oh my God, you better have the burn unit on speed dial. 99 00:03:50,839 --> 00:03:52,754 I mean, get the fire extinguishers ready, 100 00:03:52,797 --> 00:03:56,148 because she is just slinging heat! 101 00:03:56,192 --> 00:03:58,499 Which ultimately becomes fire. - Yeah, I get it, I get it. 102 00:03:58,542 --> 00:04:00,240 She can, she can be funny on occasion. 103 00:04:00,283 --> 00:04:02,590 - Yeah, it's okay though, I've got uh, Bob's cousin, 104 00:04:02,633 --> 00:04:04,287 Louis, from Elm County, 105 00:04:04,331 --> 00:04:06,071 he's gonna come in and fill in for her, so. 106 00:04:06,115 --> 00:04:09,640 - Yeah well, Louis' the last guy that should be driving in 107 00:04:09,684 --> 00:04:12,469 for tonight. Uh no, I- I uh... 108 00:04:12,513 --> 00:04:15,298 I'm more than capable of taking Moira's place. 109 00:04:15,342 --> 00:04:16,865 - Johnny, I don't think so. 110 00:04:16,908 --> 00:04:19,520 Those are pretty high heels to fill. 111 00:04:19,563 --> 00:04:21,696 - Well, don't you worry about me, I've uh... 112 00:04:21,739 --> 00:04:24,873 I've handled myself pretty well humorously speaking, 113 00:04:24,916 --> 00:04:26,744 in front of large crowds before. 114 00:04:26,788 --> 00:04:28,659 - Jeez, if you bring up that Rose Video 115 00:04:28,703 --> 00:04:30,444 shareholder's meeting again... 116 00:04:30,487 --> 00:04:33,316 - You better be spending this time toughening your skin, 117 00:04:33,360 --> 00:04:35,449 Because I've got more than a few... 118 00:04:35,492 --> 00:04:37,668 rippers up my sleeve for tonight. 119 00:04:37,712 --> 00:04:41,672 - Okay um, first off, I have no idea what "rippers" are. 120 00:04:41,716 --> 00:04:43,108 - Well, maybe you'd know, 121 00:04:43,152 --> 00:04:45,850 if you graduated elementary school. 122 00:04:45,894 --> 00:04:47,330 [Guffaws] 123 00:04:47,374 --> 00:04:49,767 - I can't believe you said that to me. 124 00:04:49,811 --> 00:04:52,901 - Oh Roland, I'm sorry, did I-- Was that too far? 125 00:04:54,206 --> 00:04:56,731 - [Laughs] Look at your face! 126 00:04:56,774 --> 00:04:59,429 "Oh Roland, I'm sorry, did I go too far?" 127 00:04:59,473 --> 00:05:00,996 [Laughs] 128 00:05:01,039 --> 00:05:04,521 Oh pal, you are going to get eaten alive tonight! 129 00:05:04,565 --> 00:05:07,219 [Door latch clicks, slams] 130 00:05:07,263 --> 00:05:09,526 [Insects buzz, birds chirp] 131 00:05:11,398 --> 00:05:13,225 [Horn honks] - Oh! 132 00:05:13,269 --> 00:05:15,184 Moira: David! What are you doing walking the streets 133 00:05:15,227 --> 00:05:16,577 all by yourself? 134 00:05:16,620 --> 00:05:18,230 - You make me sound like a feral cat. 135 00:05:18,274 --> 00:05:19,884 I'm walking home. 136 00:05:19,928 --> 00:05:22,757 - Don't tell me the store is already laying off people! 137 00:05:22,800 --> 00:05:24,585 - No, Patrick sent me home to get a cheque 138 00:05:24,628 --> 00:05:27,022 that apparently is tax for the government, 139 00:05:27,065 --> 00:05:30,025 and not, as I assumed, a bonus for me. 140 00:05:30,068 --> 00:05:32,419 - Well, I'm glad I caught you, because I got your missive 141 00:05:32,462 --> 00:05:33,855 about wanting to sup this evening, 142 00:05:33,898 --> 00:05:35,813 and I'm afraid I must decline. 143 00:05:35,857 --> 00:05:38,381 - What? Why? Why? 144 00:05:38,425 --> 00:05:39,600 - David, full disclosure, 145 00:05:39,643 --> 00:05:41,993 you have been awfully clingy of late. 146 00:05:42,037 --> 00:05:43,343 - Okay... 147 00:05:43,386 --> 00:05:45,388 I think it might be propitious for you to spend 148 00:05:45,432 --> 00:05:47,042 some time with your peers. 149 00:05:47,085 --> 00:05:49,653 What's Patrick doing tonight? Or Stevie? 150 00:05:49,697 --> 00:05:51,438 - They're um, busy. 151 00:05:52,439 --> 00:05:55,790 - Busy? Well, rehearsals end sharply at six, 152 00:05:55,833 --> 00:05:57,487 so either one of them should be free 153 00:05:57,531 --> 00:05:59,620 to dine with you thereafter. 154 00:05:59,663 --> 00:06:02,405 - I just don't think they're available tonight. 155 00:06:02,449 --> 00:06:04,494 - Hmm, too tired? 156 00:06:04,538 --> 00:06:06,583 - Mm, yes. Yeah. - Yes. 157 00:06:06,627 --> 00:06:08,193 They've both been struggling. 158 00:06:08,237 --> 00:06:10,674 - Yeah, that's-that's it. 159 00:06:10,718 --> 00:06:13,938 Your choreography has been working them so hard 160 00:06:13,982 --> 00:06:16,288 they basically just go home and fall sleep, 161 00:06:16,332 --> 00:06:18,508 so actually your show 162 00:06:18,552 --> 00:06:20,380 is stripping me of a social life. 163 00:06:20,423 --> 00:06:23,426 - Alright, David, but it'll have to be a working repast. 164 00:06:23,470 --> 00:06:25,776 I could use your eye for the final design of the posters. 165 00:06:25,820 --> 00:06:27,778 Okay? You employ the wrong font, 166 00:06:27,822 --> 00:06:31,739 and you may as well bid Auf Wiedersehen to ticket sales. 167 00:06:31,782 --> 00:06:33,741 - Can't wait. - Until then, dear! 168 00:06:35,177 --> 00:06:37,919 - We're both going home though! 169 00:06:37,962 --> 00:06:40,182 What the hell?! 170 00:06:40,225 --> 00:06:43,707 - Alexis, you don't need to do those dishes. 171 00:06:43,751 --> 00:06:45,579 - I didn't, I just put them on the counter. 172 00:06:45,622 --> 00:06:48,408 Um, I also found this on the counter. 173 00:06:48,451 --> 00:06:50,758 "Charles Darwin Research Center." 174 00:06:50,801 --> 00:06:52,542 What is this? - Oh, nothing. 175 00:06:52,586 --> 00:06:55,197 Just-just some work stuff. 176 00:06:55,240 --> 00:06:56,807 - It says you were one of ten people selected 177 00:06:56,851 --> 00:06:59,375 for a research program. 178 00:06:59,419 --> 00:07:01,638 - Oh, what? 179 00:07:01,682 --> 00:07:04,075 That's... crazy. 180 00:07:04,119 --> 00:07:06,600 - Is this why you kept bringing up those islands this morning? 181 00:07:06,643 --> 00:07:08,340 - Oh, the Galapagos Islands? 182 00:07:08,384 --> 00:07:10,430 Uh, not necessarily, no. 183 00:07:11,692 --> 00:07:13,737 - Ted, why else would anyone wanna go there? 184 00:07:15,173 --> 00:07:17,959 - You mean, other than wanting to study some of the rarest 185 00:07:18,002 --> 00:07:21,658 and most diverse forms of plant and animal life on the planet? 186 00:07:21,702 --> 00:07:24,356 Uh, yeah, I guess you have a point. 187 00:07:24,400 --> 00:07:27,316 - You were selected out of thousands of applicants? 188 00:07:27,359 --> 00:07:29,057 - It just means that they'll have plenty of people 189 00:07:29,100 --> 00:07:31,102 to pick from when I don't accept. 190 00:07:31,146 --> 00:07:32,887 - Ted! 191 00:07:32,930 --> 00:07:35,106 Why didn't you tell me you were doing this? 192 00:07:35,150 --> 00:07:37,326 - Because I applied before we got back together, 193 00:07:37,369 --> 00:07:40,198 and it takes a couple years to process the applications. 194 00:07:40,242 --> 00:07:42,679 - A couple years? It sounds important. 195 00:07:42,723 --> 00:07:45,595 - Well, listen, it's not not important. 196 00:07:45,639 --> 00:07:47,728 But I can, I can always apply again. 197 00:07:47,771 --> 00:07:49,904 You know, Emmett, the tortoise is 180-years-old, 198 00:07:49,947 --> 00:07:52,950 So I'm sure he'll still be around in another few years. 199 00:07:52,994 --> 00:07:56,693 - You love old tortoises! It sounds like a dream. 200 00:07:56,737 --> 00:07:58,739 How long is the program? 201 00:07:58,782 --> 00:08:00,654 - Six months. 202 00:08:00,697 --> 00:08:02,569 - Oh, wow. 203 00:08:02,612 --> 00:08:04,222 - Yeah, see, this is why I didn't wanna push it 204 00:08:04,266 --> 00:08:05,789 on you this morning, okay? 205 00:08:05,833 --> 00:08:09,663 Because you mean way more to me than some dumb... 206 00:08:09,706 --> 00:08:11,621 once-in-a-lifetime job opportunity. 207 00:08:12,709 --> 00:08:14,624 - Ted, I don't know what to say. 208 00:08:14,668 --> 00:08:16,496 I'd totally think about it, but like, 209 00:08:16,539 --> 00:08:18,062 my laptop's here... 210 00:08:18,106 --> 00:08:20,108 - Okay, honestly, just don't worry about it. 211 00:08:20,151 --> 00:08:21,805 - Well, what about long distance? 212 00:08:21,849 --> 00:08:23,546 I once maintained a successful, semi-committed 213 00:08:23,590 --> 00:08:25,069 text relationship with Josh Hartnett 214 00:08:25,113 --> 00:08:27,071 while he was shooting "Pearl Harbor". 215 00:08:27,115 --> 00:08:29,552 - Okay, Alexis, I appreciate your creative problem solving, 216 00:08:29,596 --> 00:08:32,990 But. you know, I-I wouldn't stay if I didn't feel 217 00:08:33,034 --> 00:08:36,690 like it was... it was the right choice for me. 218 00:08:36,733 --> 00:08:38,605 - Babe, are you sure? 219 00:08:38,648 --> 00:08:40,563 - Yes. - But are you sure, sure? 220 00:08:40,607 --> 00:08:42,870 Because I don't want you to not go like, just because of me. 221 00:08:42,913 --> 00:08:44,393 - Okay Alexis, that's exactly what's happening, 222 00:08:44,436 --> 00:08:45,829 but it's fine, okay? 223 00:08:45,873 --> 00:08:48,571 And I told you that it's fine, so it's-it's fine! 224 00:08:48,615 --> 00:08:50,617 - Okay. - Okay. 225 00:08:50,660 --> 00:08:53,445 [Magazine rustles] 226 00:08:53,489 --> 00:08:56,274 - Okay... so we're all good, then. 227 00:08:56,318 --> 00:08:58,799 That was a good talk for everyone. 228 00:08:58,842 --> 00:09:00,627 You know what I am gonna do? 229 00:09:00,670 --> 00:09:02,542 I'm gonna do those dishes. 230 00:09:04,935 --> 00:09:06,241 Babe, do you have a dishwasher? 231 00:09:08,939 --> 00:09:11,333 Okay, I'm just gonna... I'm gonna figure it out then. 232 00:09:12,421 --> 00:09:14,205 Okay. 233 00:09:15,424 --> 00:09:17,121 [Dish clatters] 234 00:09:21,343 --> 00:09:23,563 [Alexis sighs loudly] 235 00:09:25,913 --> 00:09:28,132 [Giggles] 236 00:09:28,176 --> 00:09:29,917 - Sounds like someone's in a good mood. 237 00:09:29,960 --> 00:09:32,354 - What? Me? Oh. 238 00:09:32,397 --> 00:09:34,443 Sorry, you know those days where you're just like, 239 00:09:34,486 --> 00:09:37,838 super in love? - Hmm, not really. 240 00:09:37,881 --> 00:09:40,971 - You will. Anyway, I'm just thinking about Ted and me. 241 00:09:41,015 --> 00:09:42,799 I can't believe we've come such a long way, you know? 242 00:09:42,843 --> 00:09:44,758 - Aww! 243 00:09:44,801 --> 00:09:46,411 - Yeah. I just feel so lucky to be with someone 244 00:09:46,455 --> 00:09:48,588 who would do anything for me. 245 00:09:48,631 --> 00:09:50,807 Like, I just found out that he got this crazy job opportunity, 246 00:09:50,851 --> 00:09:53,636 and he's turning it down just to be with me. 247 00:09:53,680 --> 00:09:56,465 - Wow. That is lucky. 248 00:09:56,508 --> 00:09:59,468 - He was ten people picked out of like, ten thousand. 249 00:09:59,511 --> 00:10:01,470 - Oh my God, and he's not going? 250 00:10:01,513 --> 00:10:03,254 - No, I think his perspective 251 00:10:03,298 --> 00:10:04,995 was that there would be other opportunities. 252 00:10:05,039 --> 00:10:07,737 - Still, that must be totally heartbreaking for him. 253 00:10:09,347 --> 00:10:12,437 But I guess relationships are all about sacrifice. 254 00:10:12,481 --> 00:10:14,396 - Oh my God, yes, Ted and I are so good 255 00:10:14,439 --> 00:10:16,180 at that whole give and take thing. 256 00:10:16,224 --> 00:10:18,313 Like, he gives me so much, 257 00:10:18,356 --> 00:10:20,837 and I have learned to take as well. 258 00:10:20,881 --> 00:10:23,274 - And I'm sure you give things up for him 259 00:10:23,318 --> 00:10:25,581 all the time as well. 260 00:10:25,625 --> 00:10:26,756 - Totally. 261 00:10:26,800 --> 00:10:28,671 But also, he never really asks me to, 262 00:10:28,715 --> 00:10:30,281 so that's hard for me to do for him. 263 00:10:30,325 --> 00:10:32,806 But if he did, I would. 264 00:10:32,849 --> 00:10:34,416 - Oh, so he didn't ask you to go with him? 265 00:10:36,113 --> 00:10:37,593 - Not technically. 266 00:10:39,464 --> 00:10:41,597 - Okay. 267 00:10:41,641 --> 00:10:43,817 One day I hope I find a guy like Ted. 268 00:10:43,860 --> 00:10:47,211 Someone who would literally put all their hopes and dreams 269 00:10:47,255 --> 00:10:49,257 aside to be with me. 270 00:10:51,085 --> 00:10:53,261 - Yeah. 271 00:10:53,304 --> 00:10:55,611 Yeah. Thanks for the chat, Twy. 272 00:10:55,655 --> 00:10:57,352 You're like my little fairy godmother, 273 00:10:57,395 --> 00:10:59,659 if she wore an apron, and Celine Dion's perfume. 274 00:11:00,834 --> 00:11:02,923 - Oh, so I've got a lot of good material here, 275 00:11:02,966 --> 00:11:05,969 I just need some help sifting out the gold. 276 00:11:06,013 --> 00:11:07,928 - I still don't see why you dragged us into this. 277 00:11:07,971 --> 00:11:09,756 - Well, you can be a tough audience, Ronnie. 278 00:11:09,799 --> 00:11:12,541 - What's that supposed to mean? - See? 279 00:11:12,584 --> 00:11:15,544 That's what I'm looking for, honest reactions. 280 00:11:15,587 --> 00:11:18,242 - Well, I've been honestly reacting quite strongly 281 00:11:18,286 --> 00:11:19,809 to your aftershave. 282 00:11:19,853 --> 00:11:23,160 It's a bit too European for my taste. 283 00:11:23,204 --> 00:11:25,467 - Not the most helpful feedback, Bob. 284 00:11:25,510 --> 00:11:27,730 - Look, now that you've trapped us here, just... 285 00:11:27,774 --> 00:11:29,340 - What-what do you got, Johnny? 286 00:11:29,384 --> 00:11:31,168 - Okay, here we go. 287 00:11:31,212 --> 00:11:34,258 Well, it's 1791, and three explorers have landed-- 288 00:11:34,302 --> 00:11:35,520 - Next. 289 00:11:40,003 --> 00:11:42,136 - I was flipping through the phone book the other day, and-- 290 00:11:42,179 --> 00:11:43,920 - The phone book? How old are these?! 291 00:11:43,964 --> 00:11:45,487 - Well, you're not even letting me 292 00:11:45,530 --> 00:11:47,054 get to the punchlines, Ronnie. 293 00:11:47,097 --> 00:11:49,143 - Johnny, you need a search and rescue team 294 00:11:49,186 --> 00:11:51,058 to find the punchlines for those setups. 295 00:11:53,887 --> 00:11:56,977 - Ah! Top ten things you don't want Roland 296 00:11:57,020 --> 00:11:59,153 to be in charge of: - Ten too many. 297 00:11:59,196 --> 00:12:00,850 Johnny, you gotta be short and quick, 298 00:12:00,894 --> 00:12:03,113 Like Roland in the bedroom. 299 00:12:03,157 --> 00:12:04,767 - [Laughs] 300 00:12:04,811 --> 00:12:07,204 - Now, that, that one kills every year. 301 00:12:07,248 --> 00:12:09,554 - Oh no, I love that one, is that one up for grabs? 302 00:12:09,598 --> 00:12:11,687 - No. You've gotta go for the jugular, 303 00:12:11,731 --> 00:12:13,428 Just stay away from spouses, kids, and health, 304 00:12:13,471 --> 00:12:14,777 and you'll be fine. 305 00:12:14,821 --> 00:12:17,345 Now, if you'll excuse me, 306 00:12:17,388 --> 00:12:19,869 I gotta get back to work, which, up until now, 307 00:12:19,913 --> 00:12:22,611 was the most boring part of my day. 308 00:12:22,654 --> 00:12:25,309 - Well, I'd love to use that Roland in the bedroom joke. 309 00:12:25,353 --> 00:12:27,921 - Fine, but I have a feeling it ain't gonna help you. 310 00:12:27,964 --> 00:12:29,879 - [Chuckles] 311 00:12:29,923 --> 00:12:32,708 Man, when she's on fire, look out! 312 00:12:34,057 --> 00:12:36,581 - Well, you haven't seen me on fire, Bob. 313 00:12:39,628 --> 00:12:41,412 [Insects buzz] 314 00:12:41,456 --> 00:12:44,198 - I'm glad I let you talk me into another dinner, David. 315 00:12:44,241 --> 00:12:46,243 That note you had about including my name 316 00:12:46,287 --> 00:12:48,289 on the poster as a sales tool, 317 00:12:48,332 --> 00:12:50,378 that's something I've been debating for some time now. 318 00:12:50,421 --> 00:12:52,293 - Well, your name was already on the all mock-ups, 319 00:12:52,336 --> 00:12:53,816 so it was really more of an observation. 320 00:12:53,860 --> 00:12:56,253 - That reminds me, I must pop by the rehearsal space, 321 00:12:56,297 --> 00:12:58,821 Jocelyn said some colour samples were dropped off today. 322 00:12:58,865 --> 00:13:00,649 - Okay yeah, I--hmm. 323 00:13:00,692 --> 00:13:02,346 I don't know if-I don't know if I need to see colour samples, 324 00:13:02,390 --> 00:13:04,479 you just showed me all the mock-ups. 325 00:13:04,522 --> 00:13:06,394 - But the printers require my sign-off first thing, David. 326 00:13:06,437 --> 00:13:09,527 - Well, it's-it's late, I mean, it's... 327 00:13:09,571 --> 00:13:12,095 It's 7:15. Are you sure you should be walking 328 00:13:12,139 --> 00:13:14,532 over there alone at this hour? 329 00:13:14,576 --> 00:13:17,622 - Okay David, no more "True Crime TV" 330 00:13:17,666 --> 00:13:19,146 before bed for you. 331 00:13:19,189 --> 00:13:21,452 I refuse to buy you another night-light! 332 00:13:21,496 --> 00:13:24,804 - Okay, well why don't I just pick them up for you, then? 333 00:13:24,847 --> 00:13:25,674 [Cell phone beeps] 334 00:13:25,717 --> 00:13:27,894 Ah! 335 00:13:27,937 --> 00:13:30,592 [Buttons click] 336 00:13:30,635 --> 00:13:32,202 Hey, be careful! 337 00:13:32,246 --> 00:13:35,423 ♪♪♪ 338 00:13:35,466 --> 00:13:37,599 Both: ♪ When you haven't any coal in the stove ♪ 339 00:13:37,642 --> 00:13:39,644 ♪ And you freeze in the winter and curse through the wind ♪ 340 00:13:39,688 --> 00:13:42,256 ♪ And your fate when you haven't any shoes on your feet ♪ 341 00:13:42,299 --> 00:13:43,518 ♪ And your coat's thin as paper ♪ 342 00:13:43,561 --> 00:13:44,954 ♪ And you look 30 pounds underweight ♪ 343 00:13:44,998 --> 00:13:46,390 ♪ When you go to get a word 344 00:13:46,434 --> 00:13:48,653 ♪ Of advice from the fat little pastor... ♪ 345 00:13:48,697 --> 00:13:49,829 - What the hell?! 346 00:13:49,872 --> 00:13:51,874 - I don't-I don't know. 347 00:13:51,918 --> 00:13:52,875 Both: ♪ At the window... 348 00:13:52,919 --> 00:13:54,659 [Music, tapping] 349 00:13:54,703 --> 00:13:56,357 - ♪ At the window! - ♪ Who's there? 350 00:13:56,400 --> 00:13:58,663 - ♪ Hunger! - ♪ Ooh, hunger! 351 00:13:58,707 --> 00:14:01,449 Both: ♪ See how love flies out the door ♪ 352 00:14:01,492 --> 00:14:03,494 ♪ Money makes the world go round ♪ 353 00:14:03,538 --> 00:14:06,193 ♪ The world go round the world... ♪ 354 00:14:06,236 --> 00:14:08,238 ♪ Money makes the world go round ♪ 355 00:14:08,282 --> 00:14:11,241 ♪ The clinking clanking sound of... ♪ 356 00:14:11,285 --> 00:14:13,287 ♪ Money money money money money money money money ♪ 357 00:14:13,330 --> 00:14:14,897 - Get a little! - Get a little! 358 00:14:14,941 --> 00:14:16,159 Both: ♪ Money money money money ♪ 359 00:14:16,203 --> 00:14:18,205 ♪ A mark, a yen, a buck, or a pound ♪ 360 00:14:18,248 --> 00:14:20,729 ♪ Clinking clanking clunking sound ♪ 361 00:14:20,772 --> 00:14:22,905 ♪ It's all that makes the world go round ♪ 362 00:14:22,949 --> 00:14:25,908 ♪ Makes the world go round! 363 00:14:25,952 --> 00:14:28,084 [Both panting and laughing] 364 00:14:29,477 --> 00:14:31,914 Stevie: Oh my God. - Ahem. 365 00:14:31,958 --> 00:14:34,134 - David, what are you doing here? 366 00:14:34,177 --> 00:14:36,919 - I have questions. 367 00:14:36,963 --> 00:14:38,921 - Mrs. Rose, this is Derek. 368 00:14:38,965 --> 00:14:41,228 He's been just helping us 369 00:14:41,271 --> 00:14:43,578 practice the steps to the number. 370 00:14:43,621 --> 00:14:45,928 - And how long have you all been moonlighting? 371 00:14:45,972 --> 00:14:47,930 - Just... just about a week. 372 00:14:47,974 --> 00:14:49,932 - It's a really fun piece. 373 00:14:49,976 --> 00:14:52,108 - Yes, I'm aware, thank you. 374 00:14:53,762 --> 00:14:55,546 - I'm just gonna head outside. Stevie: Yeah. Yes. 375 00:14:55,590 --> 00:14:56,939 - Thanks, Derek. 376 00:14:56,983 --> 00:14:59,333 - So all this time I thought-- poor David thought 377 00:14:59,376 --> 00:15:02,249 that you were home, resting your instruments! 378 00:15:02,292 --> 00:15:05,208 - Ohh... - I'm so disappointed. 379 00:15:06,253 --> 00:15:09,343 Both: Sorry, David. - It's okay. 380 00:15:09,386 --> 00:15:12,781 - However, in the business of show, 381 00:15:12,824 --> 00:15:16,828 skullduggery, when it leads to such thrilling results, 382 00:15:16,872 --> 00:15:19,875 a pinch of moral corruption is a small price to pay. 383 00:15:19,919 --> 00:15:22,269 [Clapping] 384 00:15:22,312 --> 00:15:24,010 - Oh, is that good? - Yeah, I think so. 385 00:15:24,053 --> 00:15:25,663 - You choreographed this? 386 00:15:25,707 --> 00:15:29,189 - I loosened the pickle jar. Derek merely popped the lid. 387 00:15:29,232 --> 00:15:31,060 - Very impressed. 388 00:15:31,104 --> 00:15:33,019 Was not embarrassed at all. 389 00:15:33,062 --> 00:15:34,585 And I thought I would be. 390 00:15:34,629 --> 00:15:36,239 - So sweet. 391 00:15:37,501 --> 00:15:39,242 [Car rumbles, shuts engine off] 392 00:15:48,425 --> 00:15:49,774 - Babe! 393 00:15:49,818 --> 00:15:52,168 - I didn't like how we left things this morning. 394 00:15:52,212 --> 00:15:54,257 - Me neither. 395 00:15:54,301 --> 00:15:57,304 I'm the one that should be sorry. 396 00:15:57,347 --> 00:15:59,349 - No, I should've been more direct, 397 00:15:59,393 --> 00:16:01,308 and we should've just talked this through. 398 00:16:01,351 --> 00:16:03,179 And I actually did some research on the Maldives, 399 00:16:03,223 --> 00:16:05,007 and there's this beautiful resort that we could stay at, 400 00:16:05,051 --> 00:16:07,792 it just means we might have to work there part-time, 401 00:16:07,836 --> 00:16:09,185 to cover the costs. 402 00:16:09,229 --> 00:16:11,753 But I feel like I could teach windsurfing. 403 00:16:11,796 --> 00:16:13,581 - Of course you've done research on this trip. 404 00:16:15,365 --> 00:16:17,498 But you've done too much for me already. 405 00:16:17,541 --> 00:16:20,109 You do too much for me. 406 00:16:20,153 --> 00:16:23,808 And so I think it's time that I give something back to you. 407 00:16:23,852 --> 00:16:25,375 - My FitBit? 408 00:16:25,419 --> 00:16:27,334 - No. I lost that. 409 00:16:27,377 --> 00:16:28,988 But the last thing I wanna do 410 00:16:29,031 --> 00:16:30,859 is stand between you and this job. 411 00:16:30,902 --> 00:16:34,167 You've worked so hard, and I'm proud of you. 412 00:16:34,210 --> 00:16:37,953 And so, yes, Ted Mullens, 413 00:16:37,997 --> 00:16:39,999 I will go to the Cayman Islands with you. 414 00:16:40,042 --> 00:16:41,522 - Uh, you mean the Galapagos? 415 00:16:41,565 --> 00:16:42,871 - Yeah, wherever the turtles are. 416 00:16:42,914 --> 00:16:45,091 - Are you sure, sure? 417 00:16:45,134 --> 00:16:46,918 - No. But, yes. 418 00:16:46,962 --> 00:16:48,181 [Both laugh] 419 00:16:48,224 --> 00:16:49,660 - Muah! Alexis, you continue to amaze me. 420 00:16:49,704 --> 00:16:51,053 I can't wait to do this with you. 421 00:16:51,097 --> 00:16:52,794 Oh! We're gonna need to shots. 422 00:16:52,837 --> 00:16:54,404 - Yes! Let's celebrate! 423 00:16:54,448 --> 00:16:56,319 - Uh, no, no, no, I meant like, vaccinations. 424 00:16:56,363 --> 00:16:57,842 - Mm... 425 00:16:57,886 --> 00:16:59,453 - Yeah, just 'cause we'll be spending a lot of time 426 00:16:59,496 --> 00:17:01,063 in tents, and there could be disease-carrying 427 00:17:01,107 --> 00:17:03,065 insects around, so. - Okay. Okay. 428 00:17:03,109 --> 00:17:05,111 Um, this is still very fresh. 429 00:17:05,154 --> 00:17:07,069 I made this decision like, two minutes ago, 430 00:17:07,113 --> 00:17:10,203 so why don't we focus more on the beach, 431 00:17:10,246 --> 00:17:13,075 and less on the details? 432 00:17:13,119 --> 00:17:14,642 - Fair enough. 433 00:17:14,685 --> 00:17:17,036 - [Laughs] 434 00:17:17,079 --> 00:17:18,733 [Raucous laughter] 435 00:17:18,776 --> 00:17:20,648 - When it comes to making decisions, 436 00:17:20,691 --> 00:17:22,867 Roland likes to go with his gut. 437 00:17:22,911 --> 00:17:25,479 And boy, does he have a lot of gut to go with. 438 00:17:25,522 --> 00:17:27,220 - Ohhhh! [All laugh] 439 00:17:27,263 --> 00:17:28,873 - Yes, I do. 440 00:17:28,917 --> 00:17:31,789 - And look at Bob, pretending to get it. 441 00:17:31,833 --> 00:17:34,836 And we all know Gwen, he hasn't gotten it in years! 442 00:17:34,879 --> 00:17:37,143 All: Ohhh! [Laughter] 443 00:17:37,186 --> 00:17:40,668 - Oh, that-Ronnie is just crushing it! 444 00:17:40,711 --> 00:17:43,497 I mean, you know, everybody really has so far. 445 00:17:43,540 --> 00:17:45,934 - Okay, okay, that's all I got for now. 446 00:17:45,977 --> 00:17:48,719 So I'm just gonna hand it over to the one 447 00:17:48,763 --> 00:17:50,895 who wears the pants in the Rose family. 448 00:17:50,939 --> 00:17:52,897 But Moira is not here right now. 449 00:17:52,941 --> 00:17:54,334 [Audience laughs] 450 00:17:54,377 --> 00:17:56,553 - So I'm gonna pass it over to Johnny. 451 00:17:56,597 --> 00:17:58,903 - All right, Johnny! Go on! 452 00:17:58,947 --> 00:18:00,514 Head on up there! 453 00:18:00,557 --> 00:18:04,648 Let's see what you've got up your starched sleeve of yours. 454 00:18:04,692 --> 00:18:06,433 - I'll tell you what I've got up my sleeve Roland, 455 00:18:06,476 --> 00:18:09,610 a few tasty little rippers that uh... 456 00:18:09,653 --> 00:18:11,786 are more palatable than anything 457 00:18:11,829 --> 00:18:14,789 Jocelyn's been serving up tonight, so. 458 00:18:14,832 --> 00:18:17,705 - Hey, is that a crack about my cooking? 459 00:18:17,748 --> 00:18:20,099 - From the guy who's had four helpings? 460 00:18:20,142 --> 00:18:21,578 [All laugh] Roland: Yeah! 461 00:18:21,622 --> 00:18:24,190 - Oh, and Bob's joking about me having four helpings, 462 00:18:24,233 --> 00:18:27,584 we all know if you've ever taken your car to Bob's Garage, 463 00:18:27,628 --> 00:18:31,588 he's not necessarily known "four helpings" anyone. 464 00:18:31,632 --> 00:18:33,155 [Chuckles] 465 00:18:33,199 --> 00:18:35,636 [Silence, dog barks outside] 466 00:18:35,679 --> 00:18:37,899 - Well anyway, a couple of little improvs there 467 00:18:37,942 --> 00:18:40,031 to get started, but uh, uh... 468 00:18:42,469 --> 00:18:45,428 what was I saying? - Nothing funny so far. 469 00:18:45,472 --> 00:18:47,387 [Roland laughs] 470 00:18:47,430 --> 00:18:49,389 - Hey Johnny, come on, I've got a white flag, 471 00:18:49,432 --> 00:18:51,434 why don't you just start waving it? 472 00:18:51,478 --> 00:18:52,870 All: Ohhh! 473 00:18:52,914 --> 00:18:54,959 - Yeah, Roland, may I point out that I was quiet 474 00:18:55,003 --> 00:18:58,224 when everyone else was up here doing their roasts. 475 00:18:58,267 --> 00:19:00,313 - I wish you were quiet right now! 476 00:19:00,356 --> 00:19:02,532 [All laugh] 477 00:19:02,576 --> 00:19:05,361 - Well, things seem to be going downhill fast. 478 00:19:05,405 --> 00:19:07,494 Which is what the town must've been thinking when Roland 479 00:19:07,537 --> 00:19:09,670 elected himself Mayor. 480 00:19:09,713 --> 00:19:11,280 [Audience laughs] 481 00:19:11,324 --> 00:19:13,587 - Okay, I'll give him that. 482 00:19:13,630 --> 00:19:15,763 - Oh, got a smile out of Ronnie. 483 00:19:15,806 --> 00:19:17,286 The last time anyone saw her this happy 484 00:19:17,330 --> 00:19:20,028 was at a 3-for-1 sale on cargo pants! 485 00:19:21,160 --> 00:19:23,292 [Audience laughs] 486 00:19:23,336 --> 00:19:24,989 - Where? Where? 487 00:19:25,033 --> 00:19:27,166 [Audience laughs] 488 00:19:27,209 --> 00:19:29,733 - All right, Johnny, starting to make some moves, now. 489 00:19:29,777 --> 00:19:31,300 - Cargo, I said car-go, 490 00:19:31,344 --> 00:19:33,563 which is what a car is supposed to do... 491 00:19:33,607 --> 00:19:35,826 unless you take it to Bob's Garage! 492 00:19:35,870 --> 00:19:37,393 [All laugh] 493 00:19:40,831 --> 00:19:42,398 - Well listen, I don't want to overstay my welcome, 494 00:19:42,442 --> 00:19:44,748 I'll keep things short and quick. 495 00:19:44,792 --> 00:19:48,491 Which reminds me of the last time I was in Roland's bedroom, 496 00:19:48,535 --> 00:19:50,232 um... well, 497 00:19:50,276 --> 00:19:52,321 I-I wasn't in Roland's bedroom, but the-- 498 00:19:53,627 --> 00:19:56,195 Ah! What was it, Ronnie? - Just sit down, Johnny. 499 00:19:56,238 --> 00:19:59,328 - Well anyway, the punchline is, it was short and quick. 500 00:19:59,372 --> 00:20:01,025 [Forced laughter] 501 00:20:01,069 --> 00:20:04,159 Anyway, I'm gonna quit while I'm ahead, folks. 502 00:20:04,203 --> 00:20:05,595 [Audience laughs] 503 00:20:05,639 --> 00:20:07,380 - I think it's a little late for that, pal. 504 00:20:07,423 --> 00:20:09,208 - Ohhh! [Audience laughs] 505 00:20:10,383 --> 00:20:11,949 - Good job, Johnny, all right. 506 00:20:11,993 --> 00:20:13,212 [Audience laughs] 507 00:20:16,693 --> 00:20:18,608 Johnny: No, I wish you guys could've been there tonight. 508 00:20:18,652 --> 00:20:20,871 I was really ripping into them. 509 00:20:20,915 --> 00:20:22,656 - Yes, I'm sure you killed them, dear, 510 00:20:22,699 --> 00:20:24,788 with all the venom of a silkworm. 511 00:20:24,832 --> 00:20:26,225 - Oh, you know what, Moira? 512 00:20:26,268 --> 00:20:28,270 Jealousy doesn't look good on you. 513 00:20:28,314 --> 00:20:30,403 Much like that mirrored jumpsuit you wore 514 00:20:30,446 --> 00:20:32,274 to Candy Spelling's 50th! 515 00:20:32,318 --> 00:20:34,842 - John! - Oh my God, Dad! 516 00:20:34,885 --> 00:20:36,931 - Why don't you take it easy, Alexis, 517 00:20:36,974 --> 00:20:38,846 like you did with your education? 518 00:20:38,889 --> 00:20:40,369 - [Laughs] - Ugh! 519 00:20:40,413 --> 00:20:42,197 - I mean, he's not wrong. - Oh, look at David. 520 00:20:42,241 --> 00:20:44,025 Smart enough to get that joke, 521 00:20:44,068 --> 00:20:46,288 but not smart enough to stop wearing sweaters 522 00:20:46,332 --> 00:20:47,811 in the middle of summer. 523 00:20:47,855 --> 00:20:49,683 - Burn, David! 524 00:20:49,726 --> 00:20:51,598 - Okay, here's why that joke didn't work. 525 00:20:51,641 --> 00:20:53,600 - And look at you, John. 526 00:20:53,643 --> 00:20:55,819 A worthy competitor emerges. 527 00:20:55,863 --> 00:20:58,039 Something the good people at Blockbuster never said 528 00:20:58,082 --> 00:21:00,433 about Rose Video. Ha! Ha! 529 00:21:00,476 --> 00:21:03,479 - That was low, like David's standards. 530 00:21:03,523 --> 00:21:04,915 - [Laughs] 531 00:21:04,959 --> 00:21:08,092 - Or the placement of Alexis' back tattoo. 532 00:21:08,136 --> 00:21:10,138 - Alexis has a back tattoo? 533 00:21:10,181 --> 00:21:12,488 - Alexis, what have you done to yourself?! 534 00:21:12,532 --> 00:21:15,012 - It says "that's hot" in Cantonese. 535 00:21:16,362 --> 00:21:18,320 Got it in Hong Kong. - Ugh! 536 00:21:19,930 --> 00:21:21,758 I was 12-years-old!