1 00:00:10,614 --> 00:00:17,614 ♪ ♪ 2 00:00:32,235 --> 00:00:34,902 [APPLAUSE] 3 00:00:34,971 --> 00:00:35,670 >> John: WELCOME TO "LAST WEEK 4 00:00:35,739 --> 00:00:36,637 TONIGHT." 5 00:00:36,706 --> 00:00:37,271 I'M JOHN OLIVER, THANKS SO MUCH 6 00:00:37,340 --> 00:00:38,072 FOR JOINING US. 7 00:00:38,141 --> 00:00:39,607 IT'S BEEN A BUSY WEEK. 8 00:00:39,676 --> 00:00:40,508 ISRAEL'S WAR WITH HAMAS 9 00:00:40,577 --> 00:00:41,509 CONTINUED, WITH HUNDREDS OF 10 00:00:41,578 --> 00:00:42,143 HOSTAGES STILL 11 00:00:42,212 --> 00:00:43,144 UNACCOUNTED FOR, WHILE THE 12 00:00:43,213 --> 00:00:44,812 COUNTRY CONTINUES ITS RELENTLESS 13 00:00:44,881 --> 00:00:46,247 BOMBING CAMPAIGN IN GAZA. 14 00:00:46,316 --> 00:00:47,849 MEANWHILE, IN WASHINGTON, 15 00:00:47,918 --> 00:00:49,484 REPUBLICANS FINALLY CHOSE A 16 00:00:49,553 --> 00:00:51,285 NEW HOUSE SPEAKER, MIKE JOHNSON, 17 00:00:51,354 --> 00:00:52,553 A MAN WITH RESTING 18 00:00:52,622 --> 00:00:54,589 ASSISTANT PRINCIPAL FACE. 19 00:00:54,658 --> 00:00:56,190 VERY LITTLE WAS KNOWN ABOUT 20 00:00:56,259 --> 00:00:57,992 JOHNSON BEFORE THIS WEEK -- 21 00:00:58,061 --> 00:00:59,460 SENATOR SUSAN COLLINS EVEN SAID, 22 00:00:59,529 --> 00:01:00,795 "I WAS GOING TO GOOGLE HIM THIS 23 00:01:00,864 --> 00:01:02,063 MORNING." 24 00:01:02,132 --> 00:01:03,297 BUT WHEN PEOPLE ACTUALLY STARTED 25 00:01:03,366 --> 00:01:04,499 DOING THAT, THE RESULTS WEREN'T 26 00:01:04,568 --> 00:01:05,666 GREAT. 27 00:01:05,735 --> 00:01:07,468 >> BEFORE ENTERING OFFICE, 28 00:01:07,537 --> 00:01:08,603 JOHNSON CALLED ABORTION "A 29 00:01:08,672 --> 00:01:09,971 HOLOCAUST" THAT 30 00:01:10,040 --> 00:01:11,439 HAS BEEN REPEATED EVERY DAY FOR 31 00:01:11,508 --> 00:01:13,207 32 YEARS, SINCE 1973'S 32 00:01:13,276 --> 00:01:14,308 ROE VERSUS WADE. 33 00:01:14,377 --> 00:01:15,843 AS A CONGRESSMAN, HE'S 34 00:01:15,912 --> 00:01:17,645 CO-SPONSORED AT LEAST THREE 35 00:01:17,714 --> 00:01:18,846 BILLS THAT WOULD BAN THE 36 00:01:18,915 --> 00:01:20,615 PROCEDURE NATIONWIDE. 37 00:01:20,684 --> 00:01:21,516 JOHNSON IS ALSO STAUNCHLY 38 00:01:21,585 --> 00:01:23,284 ANTI-GAY RIGHT. 39 00:01:23,353 --> 00:01:24,852 IN 2004, HE CALLED HOMOSEXUALITY 40 00:01:24,921 --> 00:01:26,554 "INHERENTLY UNNATURAL" AND VOTED 41 00:01:26,623 --> 00:01:28,322 AGAINST LEGALIZING SAME-SEX 42 00:01:28,391 --> 00:01:30,758 MARRIAGE. 43 00:01:30,827 --> 00:01:32,226 >> John: WOW. 44 00:01:32,295 --> 00:01:33,361 ALTHOUGH, LET'S FACE IT, IT'S 45 00:01:33,430 --> 00:01:34,495 NOT LIKE THE NEW REPUBLICAN 46 00:01:34,564 --> 00:01:35,296 SPEAKER "WASN'T" GOING 47 00:01:35,365 --> 00:01:36,030 TO HAVE A LAUNDRY LIST OF 48 00:01:36,099 --> 00:01:37,431 HORRIFYING OPINIONS. 49 00:01:37,500 --> 00:01:38,866 IT'D BE "MORE" SURPRISING IF HE 50 00:01:38,935 --> 00:01:40,067 THREW A COUPLE OF GOOD ONES IN 51 00:01:40,136 --> 00:01:41,235 THERE, TOO. 52 00:01:41,304 --> 00:01:42,937 "HE BELIEVES ABORTION IS A 53 00:01:43,006 --> 00:01:44,472 HOLOCAUST, THAT FRIDAY SHOULD BE 54 00:01:44,541 --> 00:01:45,273 PART OF THE WEEKEND, GAY 55 00:01:45,342 --> 00:01:46,374 MARRIAGE IS INHERENTLY 56 00:01:46,443 --> 00:01:47,708 UNNATURAL, WE NEED MORE WOMEN IN 57 00:01:47,777 --> 00:01:49,377 STEM AND THERE SHOULD BE PARKS 58 00:01:49,446 --> 00:01:50,778 WHERE ADULTS CAN RIDE DOWN THE 59 00:01:50,847 --> 00:01:52,079 GIANT INFLATABLE SLIDE 60 00:01:52,148 --> 00:01:54,348 THEY USE WHEN PLANES CRASH." 61 00:01:54,417 --> 00:01:55,983 AND I'M SURE THERE'LL BE MORE TO 62 00:01:56,052 --> 00:01:58,052 SAY ABOUT JOHNSON GOING FORWARD, 63 00:01:58,121 --> 00:01:58,686 BUT FOR NOW, WE'RE GOING TO TURN 64 00:01:58,755 --> 00:01:59,987 TO ARGENTINA. 65 00:02:00,056 --> 00:02:02,190 BIRTHPLACE OF BOTH THE POPE, AND 66 00:02:02,259 --> 00:02:04,759 THE ACTUAL GOD. 67 00:02:04,828 --> 00:02:06,561 ARGENTINA IS SUFFERING A SEVERE 68 00:02:06,630 --> 00:02:07,995 ECONOMIC CRISIS -- WITH 69 00:02:08,064 --> 00:02:09,030 INFLATION RUNNING CLOSE TO 140 70 00:02:09,099 --> 00:02:10,698 PERCENT. 71 00:02:10,767 --> 00:02:12,333 IT HELD ITS PRESIDENTIAL 72 00:02:12,402 --> 00:02:13,267 ELECTION LAST SUNDAY, AND AS NO 73 00:02:13,336 --> 00:02:14,702 CANDIDATE WON 74 00:02:14,771 --> 00:02:16,170 OUTRIGHT, THERE'LL NOW BE A 75 00:02:16,239 --> 00:02:17,238 RUNOFF BETWEEN THE TOP TWO 76 00:02:17,307 --> 00:02:17,939 CANDIDATES. 77 00:02:18,008 --> 00:02:18,706 ONE IS THE CENTER-LEFT FINANCE 78 00:02:18,775 --> 00:02:19,540 MINISTER 79 00:02:19,609 --> 00:02:20,508 WHOSE GOVERNMENT HAS BEEN WIDELY 80 00:02:20,577 --> 00:02:21,576 BLAMED FOR THE CURRENT FINANCIAL 81 00:02:21,645 --> 00:02:22,944 CRISIS. 82 00:02:23,013 --> 00:02:24,946 AND THE OTHER, JAVIER MILEI -- 83 00:02:25,015 --> 00:02:28,850 WHO, YES, DOES LOOK LIKE THIS 84 00:02:28,919 --> 00:02:29,851 -- WELL, I'LL LET INTRODUCE 85 00:02:29,920 --> 00:02:32,220 HIMSELF. 86 00:02:32,289 --> 00:02:33,054 >> "HI! 87 00:02:33,123 --> 00:02:34,355 I AM GENERAL ANCAP. 88 00:02:34,424 --> 00:02:35,756 I COME FROM LIBERLAND." 89 00:02:35,825 --> 00:02:37,125 "MY MISSION IS TO KICK THE 90 00:02:37,194 --> 00:02:38,192 EVER-LOVING SHIT OUT OF 91 00:02:38,261 --> 00:02:38,893 KEYNESIAN AND COLLECTIVIST 92 00:02:38,962 --> 00:02:40,061 FUCKERS TRYING TO RUIN 93 00:02:40,130 --> 00:02:41,395 OUR LIVES." 94 00:02:41,464 --> 00:02:42,697 >> John: YEAH, JUST A CLASSIC, 95 00:02:42,766 --> 00:02:43,531 RUN-OF-THE-MILL 96 00:02:43,600 --> 00:02:44,732 PRESIDENTIAL CANDIDATE, DRESSED 97 00:02:44,801 --> 00:02:45,766 LIKE MR. PEANUT DRESSED AS A 98 00:02:45,835 --> 00:02:47,468 WIZARD DRESSED AS 99 00:02:47,537 --> 00:02:49,337 BATMAN, PLEDGING TO KICK THE 100 00:02:49,406 --> 00:02:50,338 SHIT OUT OF "KEYNESIANS." 101 00:02:50,407 --> 00:02:52,440 IF I HAD ONE NOTE FOR THAT 102 00:02:52,509 --> 00:02:53,341 SUPERHERO, IT'S 103 00:02:53,410 --> 00:02:54,509 THAT JOHN MAYNARD KANES PROBABLY 104 00:02:54,578 --> 00:02:55,610 ISN'T THE MOST COMPELLING 105 00:02:55,679 --> 00:02:56,711 SUPER-NEMESIS. 106 00:02:56,780 --> 00:02:57,812 FEW ECONOMISTS ARE. 107 00:02:57,881 --> 00:02:59,514 THERE'S A REASON THE AVENGERS 108 00:02:59,583 --> 00:03:00,248 FOUGHT THANOS AND NOT ALAN 109 00:03:00,317 --> 00:03:01,949 GREENSPAN. 110 00:03:02,018 --> 00:03:04,051 BUT MILEI IS A LOT. 111 00:03:04,120 --> 00:03:05,386 "CAPTAIN ANCAP" IS PRESUMABLY A 112 00:03:05,455 --> 00:03:06,554 REFERENCE TO HIS POLITICAL 113 00:03:06,623 --> 00:03:07,955 PHILOSOPHY OF 114 00:03:08,024 --> 00:03:09,791 ANARCHO-CAPITALISM -- "A STRAND 115 00:03:09,860 --> 00:03:10,558 OF LIBERTARIANISM THAT SEEKS TO 116 00:03:10,627 --> 00:03:11,826 ABOLISH THE STATE IN FAVOR OF 117 00:03:11,895 --> 00:03:12,627 UNFETTERED 118 00:03:12,696 --> 00:03:13,995 FREE MARKETS." 119 00:03:14,064 --> 00:03:15,596 AND HE CAMPAIGNED ON HEAVY CUTS, 120 00:03:15,665 --> 00:03:17,098 SUGGESTING SLASHING PUBLIC 121 00:03:17,167 --> 00:03:18,900 SPENDING BY 15% OF GDP 122 00:03:18,969 --> 00:03:20,968 AND ELIMINATING MOST TAXES. 123 00:03:21,037 --> 00:03:22,537 HE ALSO HAS A CONTROVERSIAL PLAN 124 00:03:22,606 --> 00:03:24,038 TO SWAP THE COUNTRY'S CURRENCY 125 00:03:24,107 --> 00:03:25,740 FOR THE US 126 00:03:25,809 --> 00:03:27,842 DOLLAR, HAS SAID HE WANTS TO 127 00:03:27,911 --> 00:03:29,710 "BLOW UP" THE CENTRAL BANK, AND 128 00:03:29,779 --> 00:03:31,712 HAS EVEN SMASHED MODELS OF IT IN 129 00:03:31,781 --> 00:03:33,347 CAMPAIGN VIDEOS AND ALSO IN 130 00:03:33,416 --> 00:03:35,450 PINATA FORM IN TV 131 00:03:35,519 --> 00:03:36,317 APPEARANCES. 132 00:03:36,386 --> 00:03:37,585 HE'S ALSO SYMBOLIZED HIS DESIRE 133 00:03:37,654 --> 00:03:40,788 TO SLASH THE GOVERNMENT BY 134 00:03:40,857 --> 00:03:41,689 WAVING CHAINSAWS AROUND, AN 135 00:03:41,758 --> 00:03:42,890 IMAGE HIS SUPPORTERS HAVE RUN 136 00:03:42,959 --> 00:03:45,626 WITH, WEARING CHAINSAW MASKS TO 137 00:03:45,695 --> 00:03:46,194 VOTE FOR HIM, AND EVEN WHILE 138 00:03:46,263 --> 00:03:47,562 DOING INTERVIEWS. 139 00:03:47,631 --> 00:03:49,130 >> THE FIGHT CONTINUES FOR 140 00:03:49,199 --> 00:03:50,431 JAVIER MILEI, FAR-RIGHT POPULIST 141 00:03:50,500 --> 00:03:51,566 WHO WANTS TO SEE SPENDING 142 00:03:51,635 --> 00:03:53,334 SLASHED. 143 00:03:53,403 --> 00:03:54,435 THE CHAINSAW HAS BECOME A SYMBOL 144 00:03:54,504 --> 00:03:57,071 OF THIS PLEDGE. 145 00:03:57,140 --> 00:03:59,440 >> MILEI IS SOMETHING DIFFERENT 146 00:03:59,509 --> 00:04:00,741 THAT HASN'T BEEN TESTED BEFORE. 147 00:04:00,810 --> 00:04:02,610 >> John: OKAY! 148 00:04:02,679 --> 00:04:04,612 NOT TO BREAK MY ONE RULE AND 149 00:04:04,681 --> 00:04:06,948 ARGUE WITH A GUY DRESSED AS A 150 00:04:07,017 --> 00:04:08,249 CHAINSAW, BUT, LOTS OF IDEAS 151 00:04:08,318 --> 00:04:10,218 HAVEN'T BEEN TESTED BEFORE. 152 00:04:10,287 --> 00:04:11,853 WE ALSO HAVEN'T TRIED 153 00:04:11,922 --> 00:04:14,555 ALL-TRAMPOLINE RETIREMENT HOMES, 154 00:04:14,624 --> 00:04:15,490 OR LETTING RACOONS BE CHIEF OF 155 00:04:15,559 --> 00:04:16,657 SURGERY. 156 00:04:16,726 --> 00:04:19,393 THAT'S BECAUSE SOME IDEAS ARE 157 00:04:19,462 --> 00:04:20,862 JUST BAD, AND I'D ARGUE MAYBE 158 00:04:20,931 --> 00:04:21,963 GIVING CONTROL OF 159 00:04:22,032 --> 00:04:23,831 THE THIRD LARGEST ECONOMY IN 160 00:04:23,900 --> 00:04:24,932 LATIN AMERICA TO A GUY WHO LOOKS 161 00:04:25,001 --> 00:04:26,234 LIKE HE WAS ESCORTED 162 00:04:26,303 --> 00:04:27,802 OUT OF A COMIC-CON PANEL FOR 163 00:04:27,871 --> 00:04:29,270 ASKING SCARLET JOHANNSON TOO 164 00:04:29,339 --> 00:04:30,338 MANY QUESTIONS 165 00:04:30,407 --> 00:04:33,441 MIGHT BE ONE OF THEM. 166 00:04:33,510 --> 00:04:34,075 AND IT'S NOT JUST HIS COSTUMES 167 00:04:34,144 --> 00:04:34,942 AND PROPS THAT ARE COLORFUL -- 168 00:04:35,011 --> 00:04:36,244 TAKE THIS TALK-SHOW 169 00:04:36,313 --> 00:04:37,311 INTERVIEW, WHERE HE GOES INTO 170 00:04:37,380 --> 00:04:38,546 MORE DETAIL ABOUT HIS SEX LIFE 171 00:04:38,615 --> 00:04:39,347 THAN YOU ARE 172 00:04:39,416 --> 00:04:42,183 POSSIBLY EXPECTING. 173 00:04:42,252 --> 00:04:43,785 >> IN TANTRA, LESS THAN 45 174 00:04:43,854 --> 00:04:45,553 MINUTES IS CONSIDERED PREMATURE 175 00:04:45,622 --> 00:04:46,687 EJACULATION. 176 00:04:46,756 --> 00:04:48,556 >> LESS THAN HOW MUCH? 177 00:04:48,625 --> 00:04:50,858 >> 45 MINUTES. 178 00:04:50,927 --> 00:04:53,728 EACH MAN HAS HIS OWN DYNAMIC. 179 00:04:53,797 --> 00:04:55,596 IN MY PARTICULAR CASE, I 180 00:04:55,665 --> 00:04:56,898 EJACULATE ONCE EVERY THREE 181 00:04:56,967 --> 00:05:00,735 MONTHS. 182 00:05:00,804 --> 00:05:05,373 >> THAT'S INCREDIBLE. 183 00:05:05,442 --> 00:05:08,643 >> John: IS IT INCREDIBLE? 184 00:05:08,712 --> 00:05:10,378 I THINK IT MIGHT ACTUALLY 185 00:05:10,447 --> 00:05:11,913 BE EXTREMELY CREDIBLE. 186 00:05:11,982 --> 00:05:14,015 BECAUSE I COMPLETELY BELIEVE 187 00:05:14,084 --> 00:05:15,883 THAT THE GUY WE SAW SCREAMING AT 188 00:05:15,952 --> 00:05:17,685 DEAD ECONOMISTS, SMASHING 189 00:05:17,754 --> 00:05:19,620 MINIATURE BANKS ON TV, AND 190 00:05:19,689 --> 00:05:20,688 WAVING A CHAINSAW IN THE STREETS 191 00:05:20,757 --> 00:05:21,289 MAY BE A LITTLE, AND I'M SORRY 192 00:05:21,358 --> 00:05:22,557 FOR SAYING THIS, 193 00:05:22,626 --> 00:05:24,559 BACKED UP. 194 00:05:24,628 --> 00:05:25,793 AND THEN THERE'S MILEI'S 195 00:05:25,862 --> 00:05:26,527 OBSESSION WITH 196 00:05:26,596 --> 00:05:28,563 HIS DOGS. 197 00:05:28,632 --> 00:05:29,096 HE'S CONSTANTLY POSING FOR 198 00:05:29,165 --> 00:05:30,064 PHOTOS WITH 199 00:05:30,133 --> 00:05:31,599 THEM, OR HOLDING UP PORTRAITS 200 00:05:31,668 --> 00:05:33,167 GIFTED BY HIS SUPPORTERS. 201 00:05:33,236 --> 00:05:34,235 JUST WATCH AS THIS INTERVIEW ON 202 00:05:34,304 --> 00:05:35,603 A TALK SHOW GETS TOTALLY 203 00:05:35,672 --> 00:05:37,071 DERAILED WHEN HE SEES A PHOTO OF 204 00:05:37,140 --> 00:05:38,339 HIS DOG CONAN. 205 00:05:38,408 --> 00:05:39,707 YOU DON'T NEED TO KNOW WHAT'S 206 00:05:39,776 --> 00:05:40,308 BEING SAID HERE -- I PROMISE, 207 00:05:40,377 --> 00:05:40,808 YOU'LL PICK UP 208 00:05:40,877 --> 00:05:47,877 THE GIST OF IT. 209 00:05:53,356 --> 00:06:00,356 [SPEAKING SPANISH] 210 00:06:07,337 --> 00:06:09,137 >> John: THAT IS PRETTY 211 00:06:09,206 --> 00:06:09,704 LIKABLE. 212 00:06:09,773 --> 00:06:11,506 IT IS HARD FOR ME TO CRITICIZE 213 00:06:11,575 --> 00:06:12,740 THAT BECAUSE THAT IS HOW I 214 00:06:12,809 --> 00:06:16,244 RESPOND IF I EVER SEE A PICTURE 215 00:06:16,313 --> 00:06:18,546 OF CONAN. 216 00:06:18,615 --> 00:06:19,547 IT'S CONAN! 217 00:06:19,616 --> 00:06:20,848 THE POINT IS, WE ALL LOVE THINGS 218 00:06:20,917 --> 00:06:21,883 TO THE EXTENT THAT THEY 219 00:06:21,952 --> 00:06:22,683 COMPLETELY DISTRACT US, 220 00:06:22,752 --> 00:06:27,955 WHENEVER THEY -- 221 00:06:28,024 --> 00:06:30,424 IT'S CONAN. 222 00:06:30,493 --> 00:06:35,096 IT IS UNDERSTANDABLE THAT HE 223 00:06:35,165 --> 00:06:36,531 FAILS TO PAY ATTENTION. 224 00:06:36,600 --> 00:06:38,533 >> QUIT STARING AT ME, JOHN! 225 00:06:38,602 --> 00:06:40,501 I'M NOT A PIECE OF MEAT! 226 00:06:40,570 --> 00:06:41,102 >> John: NO, OF COURSE YOU'RE 227 00:06:41,171 --> 00:06:41,269 NOT. 228 00:06:41,338 --> 00:06:41,669 I'M SORRY, CONAN. 229 00:06:41,738 --> 00:06:45,807 I TRULY APOLOGIZE. 230 00:06:45,876 --> 00:06:46,641 ANYWAY, LIKE I SAID: THE THINGS 231 00:06:46,710 --> 00:06:49,410 WE LOVE CAN BE DISTRACTING. 232 00:06:49,479 --> 00:06:50,344 SO IT'S CLEAR: MILEI LOVES HIS 233 00:06:50,413 --> 00:06:53,347 DOGS. 234 00:06:53,416 --> 00:06:54,549 BUT YOU SHOULD KNOW: WHILE I'VE 235 00:06:54,618 --> 00:06:55,883 BEEN SAYING "DOGS," I REALLY 236 00:06:55,952 --> 00:06:56,484 SHOULD HAVE JUST 237 00:06:56,553 --> 00:06:57,318 SAID "DOG," BECAUSE ALL OF THEM 238 00:06:57,387 --> 00:06:57,919 ARE GENETIC COPIES OF HIS ONE 239 00:06:57,988 --> 00:07:00,221 FORMER DOG, CONAN. 240 00:07:00,290 --> 00:07:04,592 AND THE STORY GETS EVEN WEIRDER. 241 00:07:04,661 --> 00:07:05,226 BECAUSE CALLS HIS CLONED DOGS -- 242 00:07:05,295 --> 00:07:06,060 OF WHICH THERE ARE AT LEAST FOUR 243 00:07:06,129 --> 00:07:06,727 "THE BEST STRATEGISTS IN THE 244 00:07:06,796 --> 00:07:07,562 WORLD", AND 245 00:07:07,631 --> 00:07:08,896 ACCORDING TO ONE BIOGRAPHER, 246 00:07:08,965 --> 00:07:12,633 TRUSTS THEM TO A GENUINE FAULT. 247 00:07:12,702 --> 00:07:14,602 >> THE DOGS HE HAS NOW 248 00:07:14,671 --> 00:07:15,736 ARE DIVIDED INTO A SORT OF 249 00:07:15,805 --> 00:07:17,238 CABINET. 250 00:07:17,307 --> 00:07:18,406 HE ALSO BELIEVES THAT CONAN, THE 251 00:07:18,475 --> 00:07:20,108 DOG THAT DIED, HAS REINCARNATED 252 00:07:20,177 --> 00:07:21,509 IN ONE OF THE CLONES. 253 00:07:21,578 --> 00:07:22,610 THAT DOG HELPS 254 00:07:22,679 --> 00:07:23,478 HIM, AND I QUOTE, "WITH THE 255 00:07:23,547 --> 00:07:25,246 GENERAL STRATEGY." 256 00:07:25,315 --> 00:07:27,949 THEN MURRAY ADVISES HIM 257 00:07:28,018 --> 00:07:28,683 IN ECONOMICS, AND LUCAS IS THE 258 00:07:28,752 --> 00:07:29,517 ONE THAT HELPS HIM SEE THE 259 00:07:29,586 --> 00:07:29,984 FUTURE AND 260 00:07:30,053 --> 00:07:31,319 LEARN FROM HIS MISTAKES. 261 00:07:31,388 --> 00:07:32,386 IT'S ALMOST LIKE AN OFFICIAL 262 00:07:32,455 --> 00:07:33,521 CABINET. 263 00:07:33,590 --> 00:07:34,956 >> John: OKAY. 264 00:07:35,025 --> 00:07:35,590 AT THIS POINT I FEEL THE NEED TO 265 00:07:35,659 --> 00:07:36,491 TELL YOU. 266 00:07:36,560 --> 00:07:37,225 WE DIDN'T INVENT THIS MAN FOR 267 00:07:37,294 --> 00:07:39,827 THIS SHOW. 268 00:07:39,896 --> 00:07:41,262 I GET HOW AN 269 00:07:41,331 --> 00:07:42,230 "ANARCHO-CAPITALIST, 270 00:07:42,299 --> 00:07:42,697 CHAINSAW-BRANDISHING, 271 00:07:42,766 --> 00:07:44,031 DOG-CLONING PRESIDENTIAL 272 00:07:44,100 --> 00:07:45,466 CANDIDATE WHO LOOKS LIKE A 273 00:07:45,535 --> 00:07:47,335 WATERLOGGED BILLIE JOE ARMSTRONG 274 00:07:47,404 --> 00:07:49,036 AND SEES HIS DOGS AS SOME SORT 275 00:07:49,105 --> 00:07:50,271 OF CLAIRVOYANT, REINCARNATED 276 00:07:50,340 --> 00:07:51,639 FORCE FUNCTIONING AS A POLITICAL 277 00:07:51,708 --> 00:07:52,774 CABINET" -- 278 00:07:52,843 --> 00:07:54,041 COULD SEEM LIKE HE WAS 279 00:07:54,110 --> 00:07:55,409 TAILOR-MADE, IN A 280 00:07:55,478 --> 00:07:56,978 LAB, SPECIFICALLY FOR THIS SHOW. 281 00:07:57,047 --> 00:07:57,945 BUT HE WASN'T. 282 00:07:58,014 --> 00:08:00,414 HIS DOGS WERE, BUT HE WASN'T. 283 00:08:00,483 --> 00:08:01,949 THIS IS A DISTRESSINGLY REAL 284 00:08:02,018 --> 00:08:03,284 PERSON. 285 00:08:03,353 --> 00:08:04,552 AND WHILE THERE IS SOMETHING 286 00:08:04,621 --> 00:08:05,586 VERY FUNNY 287 00:08:05,655 --> 00:08:07,421 ABOUT A POLITICIAN WHO WORKSHOPS 288 00:08:07,490 --> 00:08:09,357 HIS IDEAS WITH HIS FOUR DOG, IT 289 00:08:09,426 --> 00:08:10,358 GETS LESS FUN 290 00:08:10,427 --> 00:08:11,092 WHEN YOU SEE WHAT THOSE IDEAS 291 00:08:11,161 --> 00:08:12,026 ARE. 292 00:08:12,095 --> 00:08:12,794 BECAUSE HE'S CALLED FOR 293 00:08:12,863 --> 00:08:14,796 EXPANDING GUN OWNERSHIP AND 294 00:08:14,865 --> 00:08:16,164 OUTLAWING ABORTION, REFERRED TO 295 00:08:16,233 --> 00:08:17,532 GLOBAL WARMING AS A "SOCIALIST 296 00:08:17,601 --> 00:08:18,833 LIE", HAS CALLED TRUMP 297 00:08:18,902 --> 00:08:19,634 ONE OF THE BEST PRESIDENTS IN 298 00:08:19,703 --> 00:08:20,635 THE HISTORY 299 00:08:20,704 --> 00:08:21,602 OF THE UNITED STATES, AND 300 00:08:21,671 --> 00:08:22,437 DESCRIBED THE 301 00:08:22,506 --> 00:08:23,337 POPE AS AN "EMBARRASSING 302 00:08:23,406 --> 00:08:24,772 COMMUNIST," A "PIECE OF SHIT," 303 00:08:24,841 --> 00:08:26,874 AND A "POTATO." 304 00:08:26,943 --> 00:08:28,209 AND LOOK I KNOW WE WEREN'T 305 00:08:28,278 --> 00:08:29,710 EXPECTING 306 00:08:29,779 --> 00:08:31,078 THE MAN WITH A BUNCH OF CLONED 307 00:08:31,147 --> 00:08:32,113 DOGS AND A ONCE-PER-QUARTER JIZZ 308 00:08:32,182 --> 00:08:32,413 SCHEDULE TO 309 00:08:32,482 --> 00:08:33,915 HAVE "GOOD" OPINIONS. 310 00:08:33,984 --> 00:08:35,650 BUT THOSE ARE STRIKINGLY BAD. 311 00:08:35,719 --> 00:08:36,751 AND MILEI HAS A LOT OF SUPPORT, 312 00:08:36,820 --> 00:08:38,453 PARTICULARLY FROM YOUNG MEN. 313 00:08:38,522 --> 00:08:39,954 AND THE THING IS, A DESIRE FOR 314 00:08:40,023 --> 00:08:42,023 SOME SORT OF RADICAL CHANGE IS 315 00:08:42,092 --> 00:08:43,257 UNDERSTANDABLE, 316 00:08:43,326 --> 00:08:44,826 GIVEN THE DEPTHS OF ARGENTINA'S 317 00:08:44,895 --> 00:08:45,927 FINANCIAL CRISIS. 318 00:08:45,996 --> 00:08:48,763 PEOPLE'S EARNINGS AND SAVINGS 319 00:08:48,832 --> 00:08:49,764 HAVE BEEN WIPED OUT, AND AROUND 320 00:08:49,833 --> 00:08:50,431 40 PERCENT OF ARGENTINES ARE 321 00:08:50,500 --> 00:08:52,934 LIVING IN POVERTY. 322 00:08:53,003 --> 00:08:54,368 THINGS ARE REALLY BAD THERE. 323 00:08:54,437 --> 00:08:55,636 AND REMEMBER: MILEI'S OPPONENT 324 00:08:55,705 --> 00:08:56,871 IS THE CURRENT FINANCE 325 00:08:56,940 --> 00:08:57,939 MINISTER, SO HE'S TIED PRETTY 326 00:08:58,008 --> 00:08:59,774 CLOSELY TO IT. 327 00:08:59,843 --> 00:09:01,509 IT'S FRANKLY NO WONDER THAT SOME 328 00:09:01,578 --> 00:09:02,810 ARGENTINES -- LIKE THIS WOMAN 329 00:09:02,879 --> 00:09:03,911 VOTING LAST SUNDAY -- ARE PRETTY 330 00:09:03,980 --> 00:09:04,846 DEPRESSED ABOUT THE OPTIONS IN 331 00:09:04,915 --> 00:09:07,982 FRONT OF THEM. 332 00:09:08,051 --> 00:09:08,516 >> WE DON'T HAVE A 333 00:09:08,585 --> 00:09:10,952 REALLY GOOD OPTION. 334 00:09:11,021 --> 00:09:12,320 I DIDN'T CAME 335 00:09:12,389 --> 00:09:12,987 HERE AND SAID I KNOW WHO I'M 336 00:09:13,056 --> 00:09:14,522 GOING TO VOTE. 337 00:09:14,591 --> 00:09:17,291 I WAS LIKE I DON'T REALLY 338 00:09:17,360 --> 00:09:19,160 KNOW BECAUSE NOTHING -- NOTHING 339 00:09:19,229 --> 00:09:19,894 IS AND I BELIEVE THAT NOTHING IS 340 00:09:19,963 --> 00:09:22,029 GOOD. 341 00:09:22,098 --> 00:09:23,498 >> John: YEAH, WHEN YOUR OPTIONS 342 00:09:23,567 --> 00:09:25,199 ARE MORE OF THE SAME OR EMO 343 00:09:25,268 --> 00:09:27,335 EDGELORD TUCKER CARLSON 344 00:09:27,404 --> 00:09:28,703 IT'S UNDERSTANDABLE TO BELIEVE 345 00:09:28,772 --> 00:09:29,704 THAT NOTHING IS GOOD. 346 00:09:29,773 --> 00:09:31,739 AND UNFORTUNATELY, THE WORSE 347 00:09:31,808 --> 00:09:33,107 THINGS GET, THE EASIER IT IS FOR 348 00:09:33,176 --> 00:09:34,408 MILEI TO MAKE THE CASE THAT ANY 349 00:09:34,477 --> 00:09:35,476 CHANGE -- 350 00:09:35,545 --> 00:09:36,277 NO MATTER HOW UNTESTED OR 351 00:09:36,346 --> 00:09:36,944 DANGEROUS -- 352 00:09:37,013 --> 00:09:37,779 IS BETTER THAN THE CURRENT 353 00:09:37,848 --> 00:09:39,514 SYSTEM. 354 00:09:39,583 --> 00:09:40,581 SO WHILE I AGREE ARGENTINES 355 00:09:40,650 --> 00:09:42,350 DESERVE SOMETHING NEW, I ALSO 356 00:09:42,419 --> 00:09:43,684 THINK THEY DESERVE 357 00:09:43,753 --> 00:09:45,853 A LOT BETTER THAN THIS 358 00:09:45,922 --> 00:09:46,821 CHAINSAW-WIELDING, BACKED-UP 359 00:09:46,890 --> 00:09:49,791 SUPERHERO AND HIS XEROXED DOG 360 00:09:49,860 --> 00:09:50,024 QUARTET. 361 00:09:50,093 --> 00:09:55,163 AND NOW THIS. 362 00:09:55,232 --> 00:09:57,598 >> Interpreter: AND NOW SHE 363 00:09:57,667 --> 00:10:01,369 SEEMS LIKE SHE IS A FUN KID. 364 00:10:01,438 --> 00:10:02,937 >> I WAS A GIRL SCOUT. 365 00:10:03,006 --> 00:10:06,274 I WAS KICKED OUT AND GIRL SCOUT. 366 00:10:06,343 --> 00:10:06,674 I WAS VERY VOCAL. 367 00:10:06,743 --> 00:10:08,242 I WOULD SHARE MY STORIES ABOUT 368 00:10:08,311 --> 00:10:08,843 BEING IN A GIRL SCOUT IF I HAD 369 00:10:08,912 --> 00:10:10,478 NOT BEEN KICKED OUT OF THE 370 00:10:10,547 --> 00:10:11,612 GIRL SCOUT. 371 00:10:11,681 --> 00:10:13,014 I WAS KICKED OUT THE GIRL SCOUT 372 00:10:13,083 --> 00:10:18,486 FOR BEING TOO MOUTHY. 373 00:10:18,555 --> 00:10:20,288 I GOT KICKED OUT OF THE 374 00:10:20,357 --> 00:10:20,588 GIRL SCOUTS. 375 00:10:20,657 --> 00:10:22,690 EDIT I DID NOT THINK IT WAS ALL 376 00:10:22,759 --> 00:10:23,658 THAT COOL AND MAYBE GO TO A 377 00:10:23,727 --> 00:10:25,126 JIMMY CARTER SPEECH WHEN HE WAS 378 00:10:25,195 --> 00:10:25,393 PRESIDENT. 379 00:10:25,462 --> 00:10:32,462 I BITCHED ABOUT IT. 380 00:10:33,537 --> 00:10:35,403 I WAS VERY VOCAL ABOUT THAT. 381 00:10:35,472 --> 00:10:37,572 I GOT KICKED OUT OF THE 382 00:10:37,641 --> 00:10:38,339 GIRL SCOUTS BECAUSE I FUSSED 383 00:10:38,408 --> 00:10:40,341 ABOUT THEM MAKING ME GO TO THAT 384 00:10:40,410 --> 00:10:41,342 JIMMY CARTER SPEECH WHEN HE WAS 385 00:10:41,411 --> 00:10:42,477 THE PRESIDENT. 386 00:10:42,546 --> 00:10:47,482 JUST A QUICK CONFESSION. 387 00:10:47,551 --> 00:10:49,117 THE THING ABOUT SLEEPING LIKE 388 00:10:49,186 --> 00:10:50,651 THIS BECAUSE YOU ARE AFRAID OF 389 00:10:50,720 --> 00:10:52,320 VAMPIRES BITING YOUR NECK, I 390 00:10:52,389 --> 00:10:52,687 STILL DO THAT. 391 00:10:52,756 --> 00:10:54,755 ♪ ♪ 392 00:10:54,824 --> 00:10:56,157 >> John: MOVING ON. 393 00:10:56,226 --> 00:10:57,258 OUR MAIN STORY TONIGHT CONCERNS 394 00:10:57,327 --> 00:10:59,527 CHOCOLATE. 395 00:10:59,596 --> 00:11:00,661 THE STAR ATTRACTION IN 396 00:11:00,730 --> 00:11:02,296 NEOPOLITAN ICE CREAM. 397 00:11:02,365 --> 00:11:03,464 NOTHING AGAINST VANILLA AND 398 00:11:03,533 --> 00:11:04,799 STRAWBERRY, IT'S JUST THAT ONE 399 00:11:04,868 --> 00:11:05,399 IS A EUPHEMISM FOR BORING SEX, 400 00:11:05,468 --> 00:11:06,300 AND THE OTHER IS FRUIT, AND 401 00:11:06,369 --> 00:11:10,471 FRUIT IS SIMPLY NOT DESSERT. 402 00:11:10,540 --> 00:11:12,507 CHOCOLATE IS THE GREATEST -- 403 00:11:12,576 --> 00:11:13,841 JUST WATCH AS THIS BABY GETS A 404 00:11:13,910 --> 00:11:20,910 FIRST TASTE OF IT. 405 00:11:23,687 --> 00:11:30,687 >> ARE YOU READY? 406 00:11:31,928 --> 00:11:32,994 >> YEAH, BABY! 407 00:11:33,063 --> 00:11:33,694 SAME! 408 00:11:33,763 --> 00:11:34,228 AND I HOPE IT SAVORS THAT 409 00:11:34,297 --> 00:11:35,196 CHOCOLATE HIGH. 410 00:11:35,265 --> 00:11:37,498 BECAUSE I THINK WE ALL KNOW -- 411 00:11:37,567 --> 00:11:37,799 THE REST OF 412 00:11:37,868 --> 00:11:38,432 HUMAN EXPERIENCE IS PRETTY MUCH 413 00:11:38,501 --> 00:11:38,866 DOWNHILL FROM THERE. 414 00:11:38,935 --> 00:11:39,634 EVERYONE LOVES CHOCOLATE -- 415 00:11:39,703 --> 00:11:41,068 THAT'S WHY 416 00:11:41,137 --> 00:11:41,836 WE USE IT FOR EVERYTHING -- FROM 417 00:11:41,905 --> 00:11:42,637 BEAUTY PRODUCTS, TO SCULPTURES, 418 00:11:42,706 --> 00:11:44,338 TO BREAKFAST CEREAL. 419 00:11:44,407 --> 00:11:46,774 ALTHOUGH SOME ARGUABLY LOVE IT A 420 00:11:46,843 --> 00:11:47,608 LITTLE TOO MUCH, LIKE THE HOST 421 00:11:47,677 --> 00:11:49,143 OF THIS COOKING SHOW. 422 00:11:49,212 --> 00:11:50,945 >> THERE'S A COMPONENT, A 423 00:11:51,014 --> 00:11:51,946 SUBSTANCE IN 424 00:11:52,015 --> 00:11:53,714 CHOCOLATE CALLED 425 00:11:53,783 --> 00:11:56,350 "PHENYLETHYLAMINE" AND WHAT THAT 426 00:11:56,419 --> 00:11:57,318 FANCY WORD DOES IS IT SLIGHTLY 427 00:11:57,387 --> 00:12:00,822 ELEVATES YOUR BLOOD PRESSURE AND 428 00:12:00,891 --> 00:12:02,690 YOUR HEARTRATE, AND THEY TELL ME 429 00:12:02,759 --> 00:12:04,258 THAT ITS A SENSATION THAT'S NOT 430 00:12:04,327 --> 00:12:07,261 UNLIKE HAVING AN ORGASM. 431 00:12:07,330 --> 00:12:10,198 I DON'T KNOW! 432 00:12:10,267 --> 00:12:10,665 MAYBE THATS WHY PEOPLE 433 00:12:10,734 --> 00:12:11,365 LOVE CHOCOLATE SO MUCH, BUT, 434 00:12:11,434 --> 00:12:12,667 ANYWAY, LET ME GET BACK TO OUR 435 00:12:12,736 --> 00:12:15,269 STEP HERE. 436 00:12:15,338 --> 00:12:17,505 >> John: OKAY, FIRST, WHAT A 437 00:12:17,574 --> 00:12:18,973 LONG, WEIRD WAY TO 438 00:12:19,042 --> 00:12:20,741 TELL PEOPLE THAT YOU'VE NEVER 439 00:12:20,810 --> 00:12:22,410 HAD AN ORGASM. 440 00:12:22,479 --> 00:12:23,878 SECOND, I CAN'T BELIEVE THERE'S 441 00:12:23,947 --> 00:12:24,879 A CHEMICAL 442 00:12:24,948 --> 00:12:25,513 THAT MAKES YOUR BRAIN HORNY AND 443 00:12:25,582 --> 00:12:27,315 THEY NAMED IT 444 00:12:27,384 --> 00:12:28,749 "PHENYLETHYLAMINE." 445 00:12:28,818 --> 00:12:29,250 THAT'S NOT A SEXY 446 00:12:29,319 --> 00:12:29,951 NAME. 447 00:12:30,020 --> 00:12:30,651 "EROTISOL. 448 00:12:30,720 --> 00:12:31,519 SEDUCTILUST. 449 00:12:31,588 --> 00:12:38,588 DAT-ASSOLINE." 450 00:12:38,995 --> 00:12:39,093 ALL 451 00:12:39,162 --> 00:12:39,627 AND JUST TO BE VERY CLEAR; 452 00:12:39,696 --> 00:12:40,294 OF THOSE ARE FREE AND AVAILABLE. 453 00:12:40,363 --> 00:12:41,629 EATING CHOCOLATE IS NOTHING LIKE 454 00:12:41,698 --> 00:12:42,230 HAVING AN ORGASM. 455 00:12:42,299 --> 00:12:43,731 UNLESS YOU COUNT THE FACT THAT 456 00:12:43,800 --> 00:12:44,332 WHEN BOYS DO IT, IT'S MESSIER. 457 00:12:44,401 --> 00:12:45,333 BUT CHOCOLATE ISN'T JUST MAKING 458 00:12:45,402 --> 00:12:46,334 PEOPLE HORNY, IT'S ALSO MAKING A 459 00:12:46,403 --> 00:12:48,035 LOT OF MONEY. 460 00:12:48,104 --> 00:12:49,670 GLOBALLY, IT'S A $140 BILLION 461 00:12:49,739 --> 00:12:51,939 DOLLAR A YEAR INDUSTRY, 462 00:12:52,008 --> 00:12:53,274 AND AT THIS POINT, YOU MIGHT BE 463 00:12:53,343 --> 00:12:54,275 SITTING AT HOME THINKING, "HOLD 464 00:12:54,344 --> 00:12:55,610 ON -- I'VE SEEN THIS 465 00:12:55,679 --> 00:12:56,911 SHOW BEFORE." 466 00:12:56,980 --> 00:12:57,945 THIS FEELS LIKE IT'S GOING TO BE 467 00:12:58,014 --> 00:12:59,147 ONE OF THE FUN STORIES, BUT IS 468 00:12:59,216 --> 00:13:00,381 IT ABOUT TO TAKE A TURN? 469 00:13:00,450 --> 00:13:02,450 I'VE GOT A JUMBO BAG OF FUN-SIZE 470 00:13:02,519 --> 00:13:03,518 SNICKERS I'M GOING TO BE HANDING 471 00:13:03,587 --> 00:13:04,152 OUT TO TINY IRON 472 00:13:04,221 --> 00:13:05,720 MEN, ELSAS AND LUIGIS IN 48 473 00:13:05,789 --> 00:13:06,754 HOURS. 474 00:13:06,823 --> 00:13:07,989 ARE YOU GOING TO MAKE THAT WEIRD 475 00:13:08,058 --> 00:13:09,490 FOR ME? 476 00:13:09,559 --> 00:13:11,526 YES, I AM. 477 00:13:11,595 --> 00:13:12,860 AND ALSO, DON'T BULLSHIT ME. 478 00:13:12,929 --> 00:13:13,661 HALF THAT BAG'S GONNA BE GONE BY 479 00:13:13,730 --> 00:13:15,663 HALLOWEEN, AND YOU KNOW IT. 480 00:13:15,732 --> 00:13:16,998 BUT THE REASON THIS IS ABOUT TO 481 00:13:17,067 --> 00:13:19,500 TAKE A TURN IS, FOR ALL THE 482 00:13:19,569 --> 00:13:20,234 MONEY AND HAPPINESS 483 00:13:20,303 --> 00:13:21,569 SURROUNDING CHOCOLATE, THERE'S 484 00:13:21,638 --> 00:13:23,671 ONE GROUP THAT DOESN'T GET TO 485 00:13:23,740 --> 00:13:23,971 SHARE IN IT, 486 00:13:24,040 --> 00:13:24,705 AND THAT'S THE FARMERS WHO GROW 487 00:13:24,774 --> 00:13:27,141 COCOA IN THE FIRST PLACE. 488 00:13:27,210 --> 00:13:28,176 THE MAJORITY HAVE NEVER EVEN 489 00:13:28,245 --> 00:13:29,744 TASTED CHOCOLATE. 490 00:13:29,813 --> 00:13:31,279 AND THAT'S SOMETHING THAT 491 00:13:31,348 --> 00:13:33,314 REPORTERS AND DOCUMENTARIANS 492 00:13:33,383 --> 00:13:33,848 LOVE TO TRY AND REMEDY ON 493 00:13:33,917 --> 00:13:35,616 CAMERA, PERHAPS 494 00:13:35,685 --> 00:13:37,685 NONE AS PATRONIZINGLY AS THIS. 495 00:13:37,754 --> 00:13:38,786 >> THESE FARMERS HAVE BEEN 496 00:13:38,855 --> 00:13:40,188 GROWING BEANS FOR DECADES. 497 00:13:40,257 --> 00:13:41,489 THEY'RE ABOUT TO GET THEIR 498 00:13:41,558 --> 00:13:48,396 FIRST TASTE OF CHOCOLATE. 499 00:13:48,465 --> 00:13:48,896 >> YOU HAVE NEVER TRIED 500 00:13:48,965 --> 00:13:49,597 CHOCOLATE? 501 00:13:49,666 --> 00:13:53,901 >> NO. 502 00:13:53,970 --> 00:13:59,340 >> MM! 503 00:13:59,409 --> 00:14:01,442 >> THAT IS YOUR COCOA! 504 00:14:01,511 --> 00:14:03,044 >> John: WELL, TO THOSE WHO 505 00:14:03,113 --> 00:14:03,878 THOUGHT I'M THE 506 00:14:03,947 --> 00:14:04,779 MOST ANNOYING VERSION OF A LOUD 507 00:14:04,848 --> 00:14:05,246 MAN 508 00:14:05,315 --> 00:14:06,047 ON TV WITH A BRITISH ACCENT, 509 00:14:06,116 --> 00:14:07,482 LOOKS LIKE 510 00:14:07,551 --> 00:14:08,883 YOU OWE ME AN APOLOGY. 511 00:14:08,952 --> 00:14:09,917 BECAUSE THAT'S PRETTY 512 00:14:09,986 --> 00:14:11,686 CONDESCENDING. 513 00:14:11,755 --> 00:14:12,487 "ATTENTION, FORMER SUBJECTS, WE 514 00:14:12,556 --> 00:14:13,321 NOTICED 515 00:14:13,390 --> 00:14:14,222 THAT YOU HAVE NOT ONCE TASTED 516 00:14:14,291 --> 00:14:14,589 THE FRUITS 517 00:14:14,658 --> 00:14:16,290 OF YOUR INTERMINABLE TOIL, SO 518 00:14:16,359 --> 00:14:17,458 ALLOW ME TO PRESENT YOU WITH THE 519 00:14:17,527 --> 00:14:18,292 GENEROUS GIFT OF A SINGLE 520 00:14:18,361 --> 00:14:20,428 KIT-KAT. 521 00:14:20,497 --> 00:14:24,232 THAT IS YOUR COCOA!" 522 00:14:24,301 --> 00:14:25,299 AND THE REASON MOST FARMERS 523 00:14:25,368 --> 00:14:26,267 HAVEN'T TRIED CHOCOLATE BEFORE 524 00:14:26,336 --> 00:14:27,401 IS, THEY CAN'T 525 00:14:27,470 --> 00:14:30,571 AFFORD IT. 526 00:14:30,640 --> 00:14:31,439 MORE THAN 60 PERCENT OF COCOA 527 00:14:31,508 --> 00:14:32,673 COMES FROM JUST TWO WEST AFRICAN 528 00:14:32,742 --> 00:14:33,941 COUNTRIES -- IVORY 529 00:14:34,010 --> 00:14:35,076 COAST, AND GHANA. 530 00:14:35,145 --> 00:14:37,211 AND RESEARCHERS HAVE FOUND THAT, 531 00:14:37,280 --> 00:14:38,479 IN THOSE PLACES, BETWEEN 73 AND 532 00:14:38,548 --> 00:14:39,881 90 PERCENT OF COCOA 533 00:14:39,950 --> 00:14:41,649 FARMERS DO NOT EARN A LIVING 534 00:14:41,718 --> 00:14:42,984 INCOME, WITH 30 TO 58 PERCENT 535 00:14:43,053 --> 00:14:43,851 EARNING BELOW THE 536 00:14:43,920 --> 00:14:45,987 WORLD BANK'S EXTREME POVERTY 537 00:14:46,056 --> 00:14:46,187 LINE. 538 00:14:46,256 --> 00:14:47,355 AND THERE IS SOMETHING A BIT 539 00:14:47,424 --> 00:14:48,422 WEIRD ABOUT A PRODUCT SO 540 00:14:48,491 --> 00:14:50,091 SYNONYMOUS FOR SPREADING 541 00:14:50,160 --> 00:14:51,826 JOY, AND GIVING BABIES WHAT'S 542 00:14:51,895 --> 00:14:53,561 BASICALLY A COCAINE RUSH, 543 00:14:53,630 --> 00:14:55,029 ABANDONING THOSE WHO GROW ITS 544 00:14:55,098 --> 00:14:55,730 KEY INGREDIENT TO 545 00:14:55,799 --> 00:14:57,265 GRINDING POVERTY. 546 00:14:57,334 --> 00:14:59,066 BECAUSE EVEN IF YOU HAD A SENSE 547 00:14:59,135 --> 00:15:00,168 THAT COCOA PRODUCTION HAD 548 00:15:00,237 --> 00:15:01,469 ISSUES, THE TRUTH 549 00:15:01,538 --> 00:15:02,837 IS, FROM THE LAND ITS GROWN ON, 550 00:15:02,906 --> 00:15:04,472 TO THE WORKING CONDITIONS OF 551 00:15:04,541 --> 00:15:05,740 THOSE WHO HARVEST IT, IT'S WORSE 552 00:15:05,809 --> 00:15:06,607 THAN YOU MAY 553 00:15:06,676 --> 00:15:07,942 REALIZE. 554 00:15:08,011 --> 00:15:09,510 SO GIVEN THAT, AS WE PREPARE FOR 555 00:15:09,579 --> 00:15:11,345 OUR ANNUAL TRADITION OF STUFFING 556 00:15:11,414 --> 00:15:11,946 AS MUCH OF IT IN OUR FACES AS 557 00:15:12,015 --> 00:15:12,880 HUMANLY POSSIBLE, 558 00:15:12,949 --> 00:15:13,781 TONIGHT, LET'S TALK ABOUT 559 00:15:13,850 --> 00:15:15,483 CHOCOLATE. 560 00:15:15,552 --> 00:15:16,451 AND LET'S START WITH THE FACT 561 00:15:16,520 --> 00:15:18,619 THAT COCOA IS MOSTLY GROWN ON 562 00:15:18,688 --> 00:15:21,556 VERY SMALL, FAMILY-RUN PLOTS. 563 00:15:21,625 --> 00:15:23,057 THERE ARE ABOUT HALF A MILLION 564 00:15:23,126 --> 00:15:24,058 OF THEM IN IVORY COAST, AND 565 00:15:24,127 --> 00:15:25,126 ANOTHER 800,000 IN 566 00:15:25,195 --> 00:15:27,295 GHANA. 567 00:15:27,364 --> 00:15:29,163 HARVESTING COCOA PODS IS LABOR 568 00:15:29,232 --> 00:15:30,264 INTENSIVE, AND DONE ENTIRELY BY 569 00:15:30,333 --> 00:15:31,399 HAND. 570 00:15:31,468 --> 00:15:32,433 AND BY THE WAY -- WHAT'S INSIDE 571 00:15:32,502 --> 00:15:33,201 THEM MAY NOT BE WHAT YOU'RE 572 00:15:33,270 --> 00:15:34,035 PICTURING IN YOUR 573 00:15:34,104 --> 00:15:35,703 MIND. 574 00:15:35,772 --> 00:15:37,438 >> IVANS KANUBE CRACKS OPEN THE 575 00:15:37,507 --> 00:15:38,606 PODS TO EXTRACT THE SWEET, SLIMY 576 00:15:38,675 --> 00:15:41,175 BEAN, WHICH AT THIS STAGE HAS A 577 00:15:41,244 --> 00:15:43,478 FLAVOR LIKE LYCHEE FRUIT. 578 00:15:43,547 --> 00:15:44,979 ONCE THE COCOA IS 579 00:15:45,048 --> 00:15:47,448 COLLECTED, IT'S LEFT TO FERMENT 580 00:15:47,517 --> 00:15:48,583 UNDER BANANA LEAVES FOR ABOUT 581 00:15:48,652 --> 00:15:49,851 SEVEN DAYS. 582 00:15:49,920 --> 00:15:51,953 >> John: YEAH, THAT SLIMY BEAN 583 00:15:52,022 --> 00:15:54,522 SOUP IS COCOA. 584 00:15:54,591 --> 00:15:56,390 CHOCOLATE STARTS OUT AS GLUEY 585 00:15:56,459 --> 00:15:58,025 WHITE INSECT LARVA THAT COMES 586 00:15:58,094 --> 00:15:59,427 OUT OF A BIG TREE 587 00:15:59,496 --> 00:16:00,061 EGG, AND IT'S ONLY AFTER A LONG 588 00:16:00,130 --> 00:16:01,395 PROCESS THAT THAT FERMENTING 589 00:16:01,464 --> 00:16:02,730 FOREST JIZZ BECOMES SOMETHING 590 00:16:02,799 --> 00:16:04,599 MORE APPETIZING. 591 00:16:04,668 --> 00:16:06,067 OR IN THE CASE OF A MOUNDS BAR, 592 00:16:06,136 --> 00:16:08,936 EVEN LESS APPETIZING. 593 00:16:09,005 --> 00:16:10,404 FROM THE FARM, THE COCOA THEN 594 00:16:10,473 --> 00:16:11,539 PASSES THROUGH A NUMBER OF HANDS 595 00:16:11,608 --> 00:16:13,641 ON ITS WAY 596 00:16:13,710 --> 00:16:14,609 TO THE CHOCOLATE COMPANIES -- 597 00:16:14,678 --> 00:16:16,911 FROM THE PEOPLE WHO COLLECT THE 598 00:16:16,980 --> 00:16:17,712 BEANS, TO THE 599 00:16:17,781 --> 00:16:18,312 WAREHOUSES WHO STORE THEM -- 600 00:16:18,381 --> 00:16:18,913 EACH OF 601 00:16:18,982 --> 00:16:19,781 WHOM GETS PAID FOR THEIR PART IN 602 00:16:19,850 --> 00:16:21,082 THE CHAIN. 603 00:16:21,151 --> 00:16:22,717 BUT AT A CERTAIN POINT, THEY ALL 604 00:16:22,786 --> 00:16:23,885 FEED INTO ONE NARROW BOTTLENECK, 605 00:16:23,954 --> 00:16:24,852 AS THIS EXPERT 606 00:16:24,921 --> 00:16:26,154 EXPLAINS IN AN ALMOST 607 00:16:26,223 --> 00:16:28,689 UNNERVINGLY SOOTHING WAY. 608 00:16:28,758 --> 00:16:29,757 >> IN A WAY, THE STORY OF 609 00:16:29,826 --> 00:16:30,591 CHOCOLATE IS A 610 00:16:30,660 --> 00:16:34,228 LITTLE BIT LIKE AN HOURGLASS, 611 00:16:34,297 --> 00:16:34,762 WHERE YOU HAVE MILLIONS OF 612 00:16:34,831 --> 00:16:37,131 SMALLHOLDERS 613 00:16:37,200 --> 00:16:39,033 GROWING COCOA AT THE VERY 614 00:16:39,102 --> 00:16:42,003 BEGINNING OF THE STORY, AND AT 615 00:16:42,072 --> 00:16:42,603 THE END OF THE STORY, YOU HAVE 616 00:16:42,672 --> 00:16:43,304 MILLIONS OF CONSUMERS EATING 617 00:16:43,373 --> 00:16:44,505 CHOCOLATE. 618 00:16:44,574 --> 00:16:45,773 BUT RIGHT AT THE CENTER OF THE 619 00:16:45,842 --> 00:16:47,108 HOURGLASS ARE A HANDFUL OF 620 00:16:47,177 --> 00:16:49,110 EXTREMELY POWERFUL COMPANIES. 621 00:16:49,179 --> 00:16:50,745 THESE COMPANIES ARE THE COCOA 622 00:16:50,814 --> 00:16:52,046 TRADERS. 623 00:16:52,115 --> 00:16:55,349 >> John: OKAY. 624 00:16:55,418 --> 00:16:56,717 THAT WAS A VERY GOOD DESCRIPTION 625 00:16:56,786 --> 00:16:58,519 OF HOW THE INDUSTRY WORKS, FROM 626 00:16:58,588 --> 00:16:59,954 WHAT I CAN ONLY ASSUME IS A NINE 627 00:17:00,023 --> 00:17:01,689 HOUR YOUTUBE 628 00:17:01,758 --> 00:17:04,792 VIDEO TITLED, "WOMAN EXPLAINS 629 00:17:04,861 --> 00:17:05,359 COCOA SECTOR INEQUALITY ASMR 630 00:17:05,428 --> 00:17:06,327 FALL ASLEEP NOW HIGH 631 00:17:06,396 --> 00:17:08,963 QUALITY HEADPHONES ON". 632 00:17:09,032 --> 00:17:10,298 BUT IT'S TRUE -- THE INDUSTRY IS 633 00:17:10,367 --> 00:17:11,766 DOMINATED BY JUST A HANDFUL OF 634 00:17:11,835 --> 00:17:13,134 COCOA TRADING 635 00:17:13,203 --> 00:17:14,435 COMPANIES, THE MOST POWERFUL OF 636 00:17:14,504 --> 00:17:15,203 WHICH ARE THE SO-CALLED BIG 637 00:17:15,272 --> 00:17:17,505 THREE -- CARGILL, BARRY 638 00:17:17,574 --> 00:17:19,340 CALLEBAUT AND OFI, WHICH 639 00:17:19,409 --> 00:17:20,374 TOGETHER BUY AND 640 00:17:20,443 --> 00:17:21,742 PROCESS ABOUT 60 PERCENT OF THE 641 00:17:21,811 --> 00:17:23,711 WORLD'S COCOA. 642 00:17:23,780 --> 00:17:25,346 THEY THEN SELL TO A HANDFUL OF 643 00:17:25,415 --> 00:17:26,247 MAJOR CHOCOLATE COMPANIES: 644 00:17:26,316 --> 00:17:27,882 MARS, MONDELEZ -- WHICH OWNS 645 00:17:27,951 --> 00:17:28,616 CADBURY 646 00:17:28,685 --> 00:17:29,951 -- FERRERO, NESTLÉ, AND HERSHEY, 647 00:17:30,020 --> 00:17:31,819 WHICH TOGETHER SELL OVER HALF 648 00:17:31,888 --> 00:17:33,387 THE WORLD'S CHOCOLATE. 649 00:17:33,456 --> 00:17:35,289 AND WHEN YOU HAVE SO MANY 650 00:17:35,358 --> 00:17:36,958 FARMERS, AND SO FEW BUYERS, THE 651 00:17:37,027 --> 00:17:38,025 BUYERS CLEARLY HAVE A BIG 652 00:17:38,094 --> 00:17:39,327 ADVANTAGE. 653 00:17:39,396 --> 00:17:41,362 THAT'S WHY ONLY ABOUT 6 PERCENT 654 00:17:41,431 --> 00:17:42,797 OF THE VALUE OF A CHOCOLATE BAR 655 00:17:42,866 --> 00:17:43,464 MAKES ITS WAY BACK TO THE 656 00:17:43,533 --> 00:17:44,632 FARMER. 657 00:17:44,701 --> 00:17:46,701 AND LOOK -- I'M NOT SAYING THOSE 658 00:17:46,770 --> 00:17:47,502 COMPANIES AREN'T ADDING REAL 659 00:17:47,571 --> 00:17:48,369 VALUE TO THEIR PART OF THE 660 00:17:48,438 --> 00:17:49,270 PROCESS. 661 00:17:49,339 --> 00:17:50,538 THEY ARE! 662 00:17:50,607 --> 00:17:52,874 THIS HALLOWEEN, TRY OFFERING A 663 00:17:52,943 --> 00:17:54,642 SPIDERMAN A KITKAT OR A HANDFUL 664 00:17:54,711 --> 00:17:57,011 OF STICKY WHITE BEAN LARVA AND 665 00:17:57,080 --> 00:17:57,879 SEE WHICH THEY PREFER. 666 00:17:57,948 --> 00:18:00,715 BUT THERE ARE CLEARLY MASSIVE 667 00:18:00,784 --> 00:18:01,983 DISPARITIES IN WHO REAPS THE 668 00:18:02,052 --> 00:18:03,184 BENEFITS OF THIS 669 00:18:03,253 --> 00:18:04,652 EXTREMELY PROFITABLE INDUSTRY. 670 00:18:04,721 --> 00:18:05,686 AND I WILL SAY -- THERE ARE 671 00:18:05,755 --> 00:18:06,988 MECHANISMS IN 672 00:18:07,057 --> 00:18:08,122 PLACE TO AT LEAST HELP STABILIZE 673 00:18:08,191 --> 00:18:09,657 THE AMOUNT FARMERS EARN. 674 00:18:09,726 --> 00:18:11,225 BOTH GHANA AND IVORY COAST SET 675 00:18:11,294 --> 00:18:12,393 MINIMUM PRICES THAT FARMERS 676 00:18:12,462 --> 00:18:13,761 RECEIVE FOR THEIR COCOA. 677 00:18:13,830 --> 00:18:16,597 THE PROBLEM IS, THOSE PRICES ARE 678 00:18:16,666 --> 00:18:17,799 NOT ONLY DIFFICULT TO ENFORCE, 679 00:18:17,868 --> 00:18:19,834 BUT CRUCIALLY, THEY'RE NOT 680 00:18:19,903 --> 00:18:21,469 ENOUGH TO COVER THE 681 00:18:21,538 --> 00:18:23,070 COSTS OF FARMING. 682 00:18:23,139 --> 00:18:26,207 AND SO SOME FARMERS, MOST OF 683 00:18:26,276 --> 00:18:26,808 WHOM ARE EXPERIENCING EXTREME 684 00:18:26,877 --> 00:18:28,009 POVERTY, HAVE RESORTED TO TRYING 685 00:18:28,078 --> 00:18:29,744 TO INCREASE THEIR EARNINGS BY 686 00:18:29,813 --> 00:18:30,878 GROWING MORE COCOA ON 687 00:18:30,947 --> 00:18:32,180 LAND THAT'S PROTECTED BY THE 688 00:18:32,249 --> 00:18:33,815 GOVERNMENT. 689 00:18:33,884 --> 00:18:35,049 WHICH IS ILLEGAL, BECAUSE IT CAN 690 00:18:35,118 --> 00:18:36,284 DO SIGNIFICANT ENVIRONMENTAL 691 00:18:36,353 --> 00:18:37,785 DAMAGE. 692 00:18:37,854 --> 00:18:38,986 >> DESPERATE 693 00:18:39,055 --> 00:18:40,354 FARMERS SUPPLEMENT THEIR CROP BY 694 00:18:40,423 --> 00:18:41,756 GROWING COCOA TREES IN A 695 00:18:41,825 --> 00:18:43,357 PROTECTED FOREST, WHERE THE 696 00:18:43,426 --> 00:18:44,459 UNCULTIVATED SOIL IS MORE 697 00:18:44,528 --> 00:18:45,993 FERTILE, 698 00:18:46,062 --> 00:18:47,261 AND STOLEN LAND IS, IN EFFECT, 699 00:18:47,330 --> 00:18:49,397 FREE OF CHARGE. 700 00:18:49,466 --> 00:18:50,965 WHAT'S LEFT BEHIND IS KNOWN AS A 701 00:18:51,034 --> 00:18:53,134 SKELETON FOREST. 702 00:18:53,203 --> 00:18:53,935 >> John: OKAY, LET'S FACE IT: 703 00:18:54,004 --> 00:18:55,336 IT WAS ONLY A MATTER OF TIME 704 00:18:55,405 --> 00:18:57,038 BEFORE THE PHRASE "SKELETON 705 00:18:57,107 --> 00:18:58,506 FOREST" APPEARED ON THIS SHOW. 706 00:18:58,575 --> 00:18:59,707 BECAUSE IF THERE'S A SINISTER 707 00:18:59,776 --> 00:19:00,942 COMBINATION OF WORDS OUT THERE, 708 00:19:01,011 --> 00:19:02,977 WE'RE GONNA STUMBLE OVER IT. 709 00:19:03,046 --> 00:19:05,379 TUMOR ELECTIONS? 710 00:19:05,448 --> 00:19:06,714 GHOST ABUSE? 711 00:19:06,783 --> 00:19:07,648 MURDER POLLUTION? 712 00:19:07,717 --> 00:19:08,249 STAY TUNED. 713 00:19:08,318 --> 00:19:10,218 ALL THOSE ARE COMING UP. 714 00:19:10,287 --> 00:19:12,019 BUT IT'S NOT JUST ENVIRONMENTAL 715 00:19:12,088 --> 00:19:13,554 DAMAGE -- THERE'S ALSO 716 00:19:13,623 --> 00:19:15,323 SIGNIFICANT HUMAN COST IN 717 00:19:15,392 --> 00:19:18,059 COCOA FARMING, WHICH HAS BEEN 718 00:19:18,128 --> 00:19:19,327 WELLKNOWN FOR A WHILE. 719 00:19:19,396 --> 00:19:20,862 AROUND 20 YEARS AGO, A SERIES OF 720 00:19:20,931 --> 00:19:22,263 NEWS STORIES AND A DOCUMENTARY 721 00:19:22,332 --> 00:19:24,031 FOUND THAT YOUNG 722 00:19:24,100 --> 00:19:25,032 CHILDREN -- SOME OF WHOM HAD 723 00:19:25,101 --> 00:19:26,400 BEEN ENSLAVED OR TRAFFICKED -- 724 00:19:26,469 --> 00:19:27,902 WERE WORKING ON COCOA FARMS THAT 725 00:19:27,971 --> 00:19:29,203 SUPPLIED MAJOR CHOCOLATE 726 00:19:29,272 --> 00:19:30,438 COMPANIES. 727 00:19:30,507 --> 00:19:31,539 AND IN THE WAKE OF PUBLIC HORROR 728 00:19:31,608 --> 00:19:33,074 OVER THIS, COMPANIES DIDN'T DO 729 00:19:33,143 --> 00:19:34,408 THEMSELVES ANY FAVORS WITH HOW 730 00:19:34,477 --> 00:19:35,676 THEY RESPONDED. 731 00:19:35,745 --> 00:19:37,044 JUST LISTEN TO THE ANSWERS THAT 732 00:19:37,113 --> 00:19:38,913 THIS DUTCH JOURNALIST GOT WHEN 733 00:19:38,982 --> 00:19:39,947 HE ASKED NESTLE ABOUT WHETHER 734 00:19:40,016 --> 00:19:40,982 CHILDREN WERE INVOLVED IN MAKING 735 00:19:41,051 --> 00:19:42,750 ITS CHOCOLATE. 736 00:19:42,819 --> 00:19:43,851 >> CHILDREN ARE WORKING IN 737 00:19:43,920 --> 00:19:45,119 VIRTUALLY 738 00:19:45,188 --> 00:19:47,989 EVERY SINGLE AGRICULTURAL SETUP 739 00:19:48,058 --> 00:19:49,590 AROUND THE WORLD. 740 00:19:49,659 --> 00:19:51,125 >> YES. 741 00:19:51,194 --> 00:19:51,926 >> OKAY? 742 00:19:51,995 --> 00:19:52,794 AS A MATTER OF FACT, WHEN I 743 00:19:52,863 --> 00:19:53,661 WAS 11 OR 12 YEARS OLD, I WENT 744 00:19:53,730 --> 00:19:55,496 TO HELP A FARMER. 745 00:19:55,565 --> 00:19:56,531 >> I DID NOT GET PAID -- PAID 746 00:19:56,600 --> 00:19:57,265 FOR IT. 747 00:19:57,334 --> 00:19:58,266 I DID IT BECAUSE I THOUGHT IT 748 00:19:58,335 --> 00:20:00,468 WAS -- IT WAS FUN. 749 00:20:00,537 --> 00:20:01,836 THAT WAS CHILD LABOR. 750 00:20:01,905 --> 00:20:03,738 A CHILD WORKING. 751 00:20:03,807 --> 00:20:05,173 >> AND THAT'S THE SAME. 752 00:20:05,242 --> 00:20:07,475 >> IT'S NOT THE SAME. 753 00:20:07,544 --> 00:20:08,476 EVIDENTLY. 754 00:20:08,545 --> 00:20:09,277 I DIDN'T 755 00:20:09,346 --> 00:20:10,445 NEED TO DO THAT. 756 00:20:10,514 --> 00:20:11,212 OKAY? 757 00:20:11,281 --> 00:20:12,313 >> YEAH. 758 00:20:12,382 --> 00:20:13,347 >> John: RIGHT. 759 00:20:13,416 --> 00:20:15,183 NOT TO STRESS THE MOST OBVIOUS 760 00:20:15,252 --> 00:20:16,217 POINT IN THE UNIVERSE, BUT -- 761 00:20:16,286 --> 00:20:17,652 DOING SOMETHING FOR FUN ISN'T 762 00:20:17,721 --> 00:20:18,419 THE SAME THING 763 00:20:18,488 --> 00:20:19,887 AS DOING IT TO SURVIVE. 764 00:20:19,956 --> 00:20:21,289 IT'S THE DIFFERENCE 765 00:20:21,358 --> 00:20:22,323 BETWEEN BEING IN AN ESCAPE ROOM, 766 00:20:22,392 --> 00:20:24,959 AND BEING IN A SAW MOVIE. 767 00:20:25,028 --> 00:20:26,394 SURE, THEY'RE BOTH EQUALLY BAD 768 00:20:26,463 --> 00:20:27,929 FIRST DATE IDEAS, BUT THAT'S 769 00:20:27,998 --> 00:20:28,729 WHERE THE SIMILARITIES 770 00:20:28,798 --> 00:20:30,865 END. 771 00:20:30,934 --> 00:20:32,567 AND LOOK -- I WILL GIVE HIM 772 00:20:32,636 --> 00:20:32,900 THIS: A LOT OF 773 00:20:32,969 --> 00:20:34,302 CHILD LABOR DOES CONSIST OF KIDS 774 00:20:34,371 --> 00:20:35,336 WORKING ON THEIR OWN FAMILIES' 775 00:20:35,405 --> 00:20:36,471 COCOA FARMS. 776 00:20:36,540 --> 00:20:38,005 THOUGH EVEN IN THOSE CASES, THEY 777 00:20:38,074 --> 00:20:39,140 CAN BE DOING SO IN HAZARDOUS 778 00:20:39,209 --> 00:20:40,341 CONDITIONS. 779 00:20:40,410 --> 00:20:42,777 AND ALSO -- WATCH AS THAT NESTLE 780 00:20:42,846 --> 00:20:43,711 SPOKESPERSON ACCIDENTALLY WALKS 781 00:20:43,780 --> 00:20:45,980 INTO A PRETTY DAMAGING ADMISSION 782 00:20:46,049 --> 00:20:46,781 OF EXACTLY 783 00:20:46,850 --> 00:20:48,049 WHY THEY MIGHT BE HAVING TO DO 784 00:20:48,118 --> 00:20:49,484 THAT IN THE FIRST PLACE. 785 00:20:49,553 --> 00:20:50,885 >> FOR A POOR 786 00:20:50,954 --> 00:20:53,788 FARMER IN -- IN AFRICA, 787 00:20:53,857 --> 00:20:54,555 OFTEN THE HELP THAT HE GETS FROM 788 00:20:54,624 --> 00:20:55,523 HIS CHILDREN 789 00:20:55,592 --> 00:20:58,092 IS VITAL IN ORDER TO MAINTAIN 790 00:20:58,161 --> 00:20:58,960 THE STANDARD OF LIVING OF THE 791 00:20:59,029 --> 00:21:00,661 FAMILY. 792 00:21:00,730 --> 00:21:01,762 >> BECAUSE THEY ARE -- THEY -- 793 00:21:01,831 --> 00:21:02,763 >> BECAUSE THEY ARE SO 794 00:21:02,832 --> 00:21:04,232 DESPERATELY POOR. 795 00:21:04,301 --> 00:21:06,167 >> BECAUSE THEY DON'T GET 796 00:21:06,236 --> 00:21:07,668 PAID ENOUGH BY NESTLÉ, OR BY THE 797 00:21:07,737 --> 00:21:11,839 COMPANIES THEY WORK FOR. 798 00:21:11,908 --> 00:21:12,340 >> ALL RIGHT, THAT'S IT. 799 00:21:12,409 --> 00:21:12,774 THANK YOU VERY MUCH. 800 00:21:12,843 --> 00:21:13,107 >> John: WOW. 801 00:21:13,176 --> 00:21:14,242 IT'S VERY FUNNY TO ME THAT HE 802 00:21:14,311 --> 00:21:14,876 THOUGHT ENDING THAT CALL WHEN HE 803 00:21:14,945 --> 00:21:15,643 DID WAS SOMEHOW "AVOIDING" 804 00:21:15,712 --> 00:21:16,744 IMPLICATING HIMSELF. 805 00:21:16,813 --> 00:21:19,113 "LOOK, THE FARMERS HAVE TO MAKE 806 00:21:19,182 --> 00:21:20,348 THEIR CHILDREN WORK FOR THEM, 807 00:21:20,417 --> 00:21:21,649 BECAUSE THEY ARE SO POOR, 808 00:21:21,718 --> 00:21:22,650 BECAUSE THEY ARE NOT PAID A 809 00:21:22,719 --> 00:21:24,986 LIVING WAGE BY NESTLE, THE 810 00:21:25,055 --> 00:21:25,620 COMPANY THAT I -- YOU KNOW WHAT? 811 00:21:25,689 --> 00:21:26,921 NICE TRY, YOU'RE BREAKING UP, 812 00:21:26,990 --> 00:21:27,922 I'M GOING INTO A TUNNEL. 813 00:21:27,991 --> 00:21:29,056 GOODBYE! 814 00:21:29,125 --> 00:21:29,824 WHEW, THAT WAS A CLOSE ONE. 815 00:21:29,893 --> 00:21:31,993 BUT I THINK I GOT AWAY WITH IT." 816 00:21:32,062 --> 00:21:33,761 AND, AGAIN -- IT'S NOT JUST KIDS 817 00:21:33,830 --> 00:21:36,097 WORKING ON THEIR FAMILY FARMS. 818 00:21:36,166 --> 00:21:37,965 CHILDREN HAVE BEEN KNOWN TO BE 819 00:21:38,034 --> 00:21:40,101 FORCED, OR TRAFFICKED, TO WORK 820 00:21:40,170 --> 00:21:41,169 IN COCOA PRODUCTION. 821 00:21:41,238 --> 00:21:42,103 AND WHILE, BECAUSE OF THE NATURE 822 00:21:42,172 --> 00:21:42,937 OF THIS CRIME, EXACT NUMBERS 823 00:21:43,006 --> 00:21:44,272 AREN'T KNOWN, ONE 824 00:21:44,341 --> 00:21:45,873 SURVEY ESTIMATED THAT IN IVORY 825 00:21:45,942 --> 00:21:47,809 COAST, OVER A FOUR-YEAR PERIOD, 826 00:21:47,878 --> 00:21:49,610 2,000 CHILDREN WERE VICTIMS OF 827 00:21:49,679 --> 00:21:50,778 FORCED LABOR, WHILE IN GHANA, IT 828 00:21:50,847 --> 00:21:53,314 WAS 14,000. 829 00:21:53,383 --> 00:21:54,515 AND BACK IN THE 2000S, OUTRAGE 830 00:21:54,584 --> 00:21:57,351 OVER THIS ACTUALLY SPURRED US 831 00:21:57,420 --> 00:21:58,352 LAWMAKERS TO TAKE ACTION. 832 00:21:58,421 --> 00:22:00,455 FIRST, THEY CONSIDERED MANDATING 833 00:22:00,524 --> 00:22:01,289 LABELS FOR CHOCOLATE, INDICATING 834 00:22:01,358 --> 00:22:02,256 WHETHER OR NOT IT WAS MADE WITH 835 00:22:02,325 --> 00:22:04,592 CHILD SLAVE LABOR. 836 00:22:04,661 --> 00:22:06,127 BUT THE CHOCOLATE INDUSTRY THEN 837 00:22:06,196 --> 00:22:08,129 LOBBIED THAT DOWN TO A VOLUNTARY 838 00:22:08,198 --> 00:22:09,297 AGREEMENT TO ELIMINATE THE 839 00:22:09,366 --> 00:22:11,499 "WORST FORMS OF CHILD LABOR", 840 00:22:11,568 --> 00:22:12,667 PROMISING TO GET 841 00:22:12,736 --> 00:22:14,735 IT DONE BY JULY 2005. 842 00:22:14,804 --> 00:22:15,670 THAT AGREEMENT LATER BECAME 843 00:22:15,739 --> 00:22:16,971 KNOWN AS THE HARKIN-ENGEL 844 00:22:17,040 --> 00:22:18,239 PROTOCOL, AFTER THE 845 00:22:18,308 --> 00:22:20,675 TWO LAWMAKERS WHO'D PUSHED FOR 846 00:22:20,744 --> 00:22:21,242 IT -- BUT WHEN THE DEADLINE 847 00:22:21,311 --> 00:22:22,110 ROLLED AROUND, 848 00:22:22,179 --> 00:22:23,811 SENATOR HARKIN HAD THIS 849 00:22:23,880 --> 00:22:25,179 UNFORTUNATE UPDATE. 850 00:22:25,248 --> 00:22:26,380 >> THOUGH I WAS DISAPPOINTED 851 00:22:26,449 --> 00:22:28,216 THAT THE JULY 1ST DEADLINE WAS 852 00:22:28,285 --> 00:22:29,750 NOT FULLY MET BY THE INDUSTRY, 853 00:22:29,819 --> 00:22:31,886 THEY HAVE GIVEN US A COMMITMENT 854 00:22:31,955 --> 00:22:33,921 -- A COMMITMENT TO ACHIEVING A 855 00:22:33,990 --> 00:22:35,590 CERTIFICATION SYSTEM WHICH CAN 856 00:22:35,659 --> 00:22:37,959 BE EXPANDED ACROSS THE COCOA 857 00:22:38,028 --> 00:22:40,128 GROWING AREAS OF WEST AFRICA, 858 00:22:40,197 --> 00:22:44,365 AND WHICH WILL COVER 50% OF THE 859 00:22:44,434 --> 00:22:46,467 COCOA-GROWING AREAS OF IVORY 860 00:22:46,536 --> 00:22:48,970 COAST AND GHANA IN THREE YEARS' 861 00:22:49,039 --> 00:22:50,938 TIME. I'M VERY PLEASED WITH 862 00:22:51,007 --> 00:22:53,274 THIS COMMITMENT. 863 00:22:53,343 --> 00:22:54,742 >> John: ARE YOU? 864 00:22:54,811 --> 00:22:56,010 BECAUSE IF SO, I'M GENUINELY 865 00:22:56,079 --> 00:22:57,044 JEALOUS OF YOUR INFINITE 866 00:22:57,113 --> 00:22:58,045 CAPACITY FOR TRUSTING 867 00:22:58,114 --> 00:22:59,781 OTHERS. 868 00:22:59,850 --> 00:23:00,948 "AH, I SEE FROM THE FIRST PANEL 869 00:23:01,017 --> 00:23:01,549 OF TODAY'S PEANUTS COMIC THAT 870 00:23:01,618 --> 00:23:02,283 LUCY IS FINALLY GOING TO LET 871 00:23:02,352 --> 00:23:04,385 CHARLIE BROWN KICK 872 00:23:04,454 --> 00:23:04,719 THE FOOTBALL. 873 00:23:04,788 --> 00:23:06,053 WHILE I WAS DISAPPOINTED 874 00:23:06,122 --> 00:23:07,188 BY HER ACTIONS IN THE PAST, IT 875 00:23:07,257 --> 00:23:08,689 SEEMS THAT A NEW DAY HAS BROUGHT 876 00:23:08,758 --> 00:23:09,891 A SENSE OF INTEGRITY WITHIN THIS 877 00:23:09,960 --> 00:23:11,359 YOUNG GIRL, AND I 878 00:23:11,428 --> 00:23:12,860 AM VERY EXCITED TO MOVE MY GAZE 879 00:23:12,929 --> 00:23:13,795 DOWN THE PAGE AND SEE THIS 880 00:23:13,864 --> 00:23:14,796 COMMITMENT HONORED IN -- 881 00:23:14,865 --> 00:23:16,998 WHAT? 882 00:23:17,067 --> 00:23:18,399 SHE DID IT AGAIN? 883 00:23:18,468 --> 00:23:19,767 AND PREDICTABLY, THE COMPANIES 884 00:23:19,836 --> 00:23:20,368 DIDN'T MEET THAT NEW DEADLINE 885 00:23:20,437 --> 00:23:22,069 EITHER. 886 00:23:22,138 --> 00:23:24,005 ONCE 2008 ROLLED AROUND, THEY 887 00:23:24,074 --> 00:23:25,673 KICKED IT TO 2010, THEN PUSHED 888 00:23:25,742 --> 00:23:26,774 IT "AGAIN", TO 2020 -- 889 00:23:26,843 --> 00:23:28,843 WHILE SIMULTANEOUSLY DOWNGRADING 890 00:23:28,912 --> 00:23:30,645 THEIR GOAL TO JUST GETTING A 70 891 00:23:30,714 --> 00:23:32,146 PERCENT REDUCTION IN CHILD 892 00:23:32,215 --> 00:23:34,315 LABOR, RATHER THAN ELIMINATING 893 00:23:34,384 --> 00:23:36,384 IT ENTIRELY, THEN 894 00:23:36,453 --> 00:23:37,585 MISSED THAT DEADLINE TOO. 895 00:23:37,654 --> 00:23:38,786 AND THE COMPANIES ALMOST 896 00:23:38,855 --> 00:23:39,887 CERTAINLY 897 00:23:39,956 --> 00:23:40,788 KNEW THEY WOULDN'T BE KEEPING 898 00:23:40,857 --> 00:23:42,824 THEIR PROMISES. 899 00:23:42,893 --> 00:23:43,691 AS THE FORMER HEAD OF THE 900 00:23:43,760 --> 00:23:45,793 INTERNATIONAL COCOA INITIATIVE 901 00:23:45,862 --> 00:23:46,894 PUT IT, "WAS THERE ANY CHANCE OF 902 00:23:46,963 --> 00:23:47,962 CHILD LABOR BEING ERADICATED BY 903 00:23:48,031 --> 00:23:48,796 THE ORIGINAL 2005 904 00:23:48,865 --> 00:23:49,564 DEADLINE?" 905 00:23:49,633 --> 00:23:51,165 NO, NEVER. 906 00:23:51,234 --> 00:23:53,434 AND AT THAT POINT, WHY BOTHER 907 00:23:53,503 --> 00:23:55,336 SETTING A DATE AT ALL? 908 00:23:55,405 --> 00:23:57,071 IF YOUR FRIEND AGREES TO MEET 909 00:23:57,140 --> 00:23:59,040 YOU FOR DINNER AT 7, THEN PUSHES 910 00:23:59,109 --> 00:24:01,442 IT TO 7:30, THEN 8, AND FINALLY 911 00:24:01,511 --> 00:24:03,010 SAYS "BE THERE IN 20 -- YEARS 912 00:24:03,079 --> 00:24:04,946 NOT MINUTES," 913 00:24:05,015 --> 00:24:06,314 IT KIND OF FEELS LIKE THEY NEVER 914 00:24:06,383 --> 00:24:07,715 HAD ANY INTENTION OF GETTING 915 00:24:07,784 --> 00:24:08,149 DINNER IN THE FIRST 916 00:24:08,218 --> 00:24:09,450 PLACE. 917 00:24:09,519 --> 00:24:11,252 AND I WILL SAY -- IT'S NOT LIKE 918 00:24:11,321 --> 00:24:12,053 THE CHOCOLATE COMPANIES HAVE 919 00:24:12,122 --> 00:24:13,688 DONE NOTHING. 920 00:24:13,757 --> 00:24:14,489 THEY ALL STARTED FLASHY-LOOKING 921 00:24:14,558 --> 00:24:16,491 PROGRAMS WITH "COCOA" 922 00:24:16,560 --> 00:24:18,392 IN THEIR NAMES THAT PROMISED TO 923 00:24:18,461 --> 00:24:19,393 BE VIGILANT ABOUT MONITORING FOR 924 00:24:19,462 --> 00:24:22,029 CHILD LABOR, AND PRODUCED 925 00:24:22,098 --> 00:24:24,132 IMPRESSIVE-LOOKING ADS FEATURING 926 00:24:24,201 --> 00:24:25,433 HAPPY FARMERS, AND WEBSITES 927 00:24:25,502 --> 00:24:26,100 SHOWING HOW CAREFULLY THEY 928 00:24:26,169 --> 00:24:28,102 MONITOR THEIR SUPPLY CHAIN. 929 00:24:28,171 --> 00:24:29,871 BUT THE REALITY HASN'T REMOTELY 930 00:24:29,940 --> 00:24:31,405 LIVED UP TO THE RHETORIC. 931 00:24:31,474 --> 00:24:32,306 LAST YEAR, SOME JOURNALISTS 932 00:24:32,375 --> 00:24:33,608 LOOKED AT A MAP OF FARMS ON 933 00:24:33,677 --> 00:24:34,942 MONDELEZ'S "COCOA LIFE" 934 00:24:35,011 --> 00:24:36,744 WEBSITE, THEN SENT A CAMERA CREW 935 00:24:36,813 --> 00:24:38,646 TO GHANA TO CHECK SOME OUT, AND 936 00:24:38,715 --> 00:24:39,947 YOU'LL NEVER GUESS WHAT THEY 937 00:24:40,016 --> 00:24:41,816 FOUND. 938 00:24:41,885 --> 00:24:43,451 >> IT DIDN'T TAKE LONG TO FIND 939 00:24:43,520 --> 00:24:45,319 CHILDREN WORKING ON A FARM 940 00:24:45,388 --> 00:24:47,155 MATCHING THE COORDINATES LISTED 941 00:24:47,224 --> 00:24:49,257 ON THE COCOA LIFE WEBSITE. 942 00:24:49,326 --> 00:24:50,491 THE TEAM FILMED TWO 943 00:24:50,560 --> 00:24:52,727 YOUNG BOYS AGED 10 AND 11, 944 00:24:52,796 --> 00:24:57,465 HARVESTING COCOA PODS USING LONG 945 00:24:57,534 --> 00:24:58,633 STICKS WITH SHARP HOOKS AND 946 00:24:58,702 --> 00:25:00,101 WEARING NO PROTECTIVE CLOTHING. 947 00:25:00,170 --> 00:25:01,335 >> John: YEAH, THEY WENT TO JUST 948 00:25:01,404 --> 00:25:03,905 ONE OF THE FARMS LISTED ON THEIR 949 00:25:03,974 --> 00:25:05,206 SITE -- A SITE FILLED WITH 950 00:25:05,275 --> 00:25:06,307 CLAIMS THAT CHILD LABOR IS 951 00:25:06,376 --> 00:25:06,908 COMPLETELY UNACCEPTABLE -- AND 952 00:25:06,977 --> 00:25:07,909 INSTANTLY FOUND 953 00:25:07,978 --> 00:25:09,310 CHILD LABOR. 954 00:25:09,379 --> 00:25:10,111 AND I DON'T KNOW WHAT STATEMENT 955 00:25:10,180 --> 00:25:10,845 MONDELEZ CAN RELEASE IN THE WAKE 956 00:25:10,914 --> 00:25:12,046 OF THAT, OTHER THAN MAYBE, 957 00:25:12,115 --> 00:25:13,047 "HONESTLY DID NOT THINK ANYONE 958 00:25:13,116 --> 00:25:14,849 WOULD ACTUALLY CHECK." 959 00:25:14,918 --> 00:25:15,850 AND IF YOU'RE THINKING, 960 00:25:15,919 --> 00:25:17,151 "OBVIOUSLY WE CAN'T TRUST 961 00:25:17,220 --> 00:25:18,519 COMPANIES TO MONITOR 962 00:25:18,588 --> 00:25:19,287 THEMSELVES -- THAT'S WHY THERE 963 00:25:19,356 --> 00:25:19,987 SHOULD BE A THIRD PARTY 964 00:25:20,056 --> 00:25:20,888 INVOLVED." 965 00:25:20,957 --> 00:25:22,323 THE THING IS, THOSE HAVE ALSO 966 00:25:22,392 --> 00:25:23,958 EXISTED FOR YEARS -- CHOCOLATE 967 00:25:24,027 --> 00:25:25,693 COMPANIES HAVE LONG 968 00:25:25,762 --> 00:25:26,527 PURCHASED AT LEAST SOME OF THEIR 969 00:25:26,596 --> 00:25:28,262 BEANS FROM THIRD-PARTY 970 00:25:28,331 --> 00:25:30,097 ORGANIZATIONS LIKE THESE, WHO 971 00:25:30,166 --> 00:25:31,599 CERTIFY THE FARMERS WHO 972 00:25:31,668 --> 00:25:33,468 SUPPLY THEM HAVE MET CERTAIN 973 00:25:33,537 --> 00:25:34,302 CHILD LABOR AND ENVIRONMENTAL 974 00:25:34,371 --> 00:25:35,169 STANDARDS. 975 00:25:35,238 --> 00:25:36,971 YOU MIGHT HAVE SEEN ONE OF THESE 976 00:25:37,040 --> 00:25:38,139 LOGOS ON A CHOCOLATE BAR AND 977 00:25:38,208 --> 00:25:39,774 FELT REASSURED BY IT. 978 00:25:39,843 --> 00:25:41,375 BUT WHILE ADVOCATES SAY SOME OF 979 00:25:41,444 --> 00:25:42,810 THESE ORGANIZATIONS HAVE 980 00:25:42,879 --> 00:25:44,779 IMPROVED CONDITIONS SOMEWHAT, 981 00:25:44,848 --> 00:25:46,414 THESE LOGOS JUST 982 00:25:46,483 --> 00:25:47,482 AREN'T THE GUARANTEE YOU MIGHT 983 00:25:47,551 --> 00:25:48,516 WANT THEM TO BE. 984 00:25:48,585 --> 00:25:49,550 FOR A START, WHILE THE 985 00:25:49,619 --> 00:25:50,852 ORGANIZATIONS PAY 986 00:25:50,921 --> 00:25:52,019 FARMERS A SMALL PREMIUM FOR 987 00:25:52,088 --> 00:25:52,620 MEETING THEIR STANDARDS, THOSE 988 00:25:52,689 --> 00:25:53,788 PREMIUMS MIGHT 989 00:25:53,857 --> 00:25:54,589 NOT EVEN COVER THE COST OF 990 00:25:54,658 --> 00:25:56,124 COMPLYING WITH THE PROGRAM. 991 00:25:56,193 --> 00:25:58,292 BUT ALSO, INSPECTIONS FOR THE 992 00:25:58,361 --> 00:25:59,894 LABELS ARE REQUIRED 993 00:25:59,963 --> 00:26:01,395 OF FEWER THAN 1 IN 10 FARMS 994 00:26:01,464 --> 00:26:02,830 ANNUALLY. 995 00:26:02,899 --> 00:26:04,298 AND JUST WATCH WHAT HAPPENED 996 00:26:04,367 --> 00:26:06,267 WHEN REPORTERS WENT UNDERCOVER 997 00:26:06,336 --> 00:26:08,202 AS CHOCOLATE COMPANY EXECUTIVES, 998 00:26:08,271 --> 00:26:08,836 AND VISITED A CONTRACTOR WHO DID 999 00:26:08,905 --> 00:26:09,871 AUDITS FOR "UTZ", ONE OF THOSE 1000 00:26:09,940 --> 00:26:11,773 THIRD-PARTY ORGANIZATIONS. 1001 00:26:11,842 --> 00:26:13,441 BECAUSE HE EXPLAINS TO THEM 1002 00:26:13,510 --> 00:26:14,942 EXACTLY WHY HE'S CONFIDENT THAT 1003 00:26:15,011 --> 00:26:17,879 HE WON'T FIND CHILD 1004 00:26:17,948 --> 00:26:24,948 LABOR ON ANY FARM HE VISITS. 1005 00:26:28,124 --> 00:26:29,524 >> WHEN YOU GO TO THEM YOU'RE 1006 00:26:29,593 --> 00:26:31,159 NOT GOING TO SEE ANY CHILDREN. 1007 00:26:31,228 --> 00:26:32,059 >> John: IT'S TRUE -- AUDITORS 1008 00:26:32,128 --> 00:26:33,628 GIVE ADVANCE NOTICE OF 1009 00:26:33,697 --> 00:26:34,395 INSPECTIONS. 1010 00:26:34,464 --> 00:26:35,196 WHICH IS RIDICULOUS. 1011 00:26:35,265 --> 00:26:35,830 BECAUSE THAT'S NEVER GOING TO BE 1012 00:26:35,899 --> 00:26:37,632 RELIABLE. 1013 00:26:37,701 --> 00:26:39,300 IF YOU TELL YOUR TEENAGER "I'M 1014 00:26:39,369 --> 00:26:41,502 CHECKING YOUR BACKPACK FOR 1015 00:26:41,571 --> 00:26:43,404 CIGARETTES NEXT TUESDAY," 1016 00:26:43,473 --> 00:26:44,138 THEN GREAT NEWS, YOU'RE 1017 00:26:44,207 --> 00:26:47,074 NOT GONNA FIND ANY. 1018 00:26:47,143 --> 00:26:54,048 NOW, I HAVE TO TELL YOU, UTZ 1019 00:26:54,117 --> 00:26:54,649 MAINTAIN AND HOLD AUDITORS TO 1020 00:26:54,718 --> 00:26:57,018 THE HIGHEST STANDARDS. 1021 00:26:57,087 --> 00:27:01,322 DO NOT SEEM TO HIDE TO ME. 1022 00:27:01,391 --> 00:27:02,490 AS FOR MONDELEZ, WHO, REMEMBER, 1023 00:27:02,559 --> 00:27:02,890 -- AS HIGH TO ME. 1024 00:27:02,959 --> 00:27:05,059 TURNED OUT TO HAVE CHILD LABOR 1025 00:27:05,128 --> 00:27:05,793 AT ONE OF ITS SUPPLIERS IN 1026 00:27:05,862 --> 00:27:06,360 GHANA, IT SAID THAT IT WAS 1027 00:27:06,429 --> 00:27:06,928 "DEEPLY CONCERNED" BY THESE 1028 00:27:06,997 --> 00:27:07,562 INCIDENTS, AND, OKAY THAT MAKES 1029 00:27:07,631 --> 00:27:09,163 TWO OF US, MONDELEZ. 1030 00:27:09,232 --> 00:27:10,998 IT ALSO WANTS YOU TO KNOW THAT 1031 00:27:11,067 --> 00:27:12,600 IT HAS A CHILD LABOR MONITORING 1032 00:27:12,669 --> 00:27:13,234 SYSTEM IN PLACE TO PREVENT THIS 1033 00:27:13,303 --> 00:27:14,936 KIND OF THING FROM HAPPENING. 1034 00:27:15,005 --> 00:27:16,971 WHICH IS VERY REASSURING, UNTIL 1035 00:27:17,040 --> 00:27:18,005 YOU REMEMBER IT ONLY TOOK A 1036 00:27:18,074 --> 00:27:19,006 DOCUMENTARY CREW ONE FLIGHT TO 1037 00:27:19,075 --> 00:27:20,508 GHANA TO PROVE THAT 1038 00:27:20,577 --> 00:27:21,542 SYSTEM IS, AT BEST, DEEPLY 1039 00:27:21,611 --> 00:27:23,811 INADEQUATE. 1040 00:27:23,880 --> 00:27:25,113 AND THAT'S THE THING -- ALL 1041 00:27:25,182 --> 00:27:27,081 THESE COMPANIES WILL SAY THEY'RE 1042 00:27:27,150 --> 00:27:29,250 CONCERNED ABOUT CHILD LABOR, AND 1043 00:27:29,319 --> 00:27:30,384 THAT THEY'VE SPENT A LOT OF 1044 00:27:30,453 --> 00:27:31,486 MONEY TRYING TO FIX IT. 1045 00:27:31,555 --> 00:27:32,787 BY ONE ESTIMATE, AS OF 2019, 1046 00:27:32,856 --> 00:27:34,088 THEY'D SPENT 1047 00:27:34,157 --> 00:27:35,389 MORE THAN $150 MILLION TO 1048 00:27:35,458 --> 00:27:37,091 ADDRESS THIS ISSUE. 1049 00:27:37,160 --> 00:27:39,560 BUT THAT'S OVER 18 YEARS, AND 1050 00:27:39,629 --> 00:27:40,862 WHILE THEY WERE COLLECTING $103 1051 00:27:40,931 --> 00:27:43,064 BILLION IN SALES ANNUALLY. 1052 00:27:43,133 --> 00:27:45,433 MEANING THAT OVER TWO DECADES, 1053 00:27:45,502 --> 00:27:48,236 THEY'VE SPENT JUST 0.1 PERCENT 1054 00:27:48,305 --> 00:27:49,871 OF ONE YEAR'S SALES. 1055 00:27:49,940 --> 00:27:51,105 AND COME ON! 1056 00:27:51,174 --> 00:27:52,406 M&M'S MUST'VE SPENT MORE THAN 1057 00:27:52,475 --> 00:27:54,142 THAT, FINE-TUNING EXACTLY HOW 1058 00:27:54,211 --> 00:27:57,845 FUCKABLE THE GREEN M&M IS. 1059 00:27:57,914 --> 00:28:00,047 AND FOR ALL THE COMPANIES' 1060 00:28:00,116 --> 00:28:00,982 CLAIMS OF CONCERN, THE FACT 1061 00:28:01,051 --> 00:28:01,949 REMAINS: ACCORDING TO 1062 00:28:02,018 --> 00:28:03,317 THE US DEPARTMENT OF LABOR AN 1063 00:28:03,386 --> 00:28:05,953 ESTIMATED 1.5 MILLION CHILDREN 1064 00:28:06,022 --> 00:28:07,388 WORK IN COCOA PRODUCTION IN 1065 00:28:07,457 --> 00:28:08,689 GHANA AND IVORY 1066 00:28:08,758 --> 00:28:09,323 COAST, MANY OF WHOM ARE ENGAGED 1067 00:28:09,392 --> 00:28:10,925 IN DANGEROUS TASKS. 1068 00:28:10,994 --> 00:28:11,993 OR, AS A WASHINGTON POST 1069 00:28:12,062 --> 00:28:13,060 INVESTIGATION 1070 00:28:13,129 --> 00:28:13,861 CONCLUDED, "THE ODDS ARE 1071 00:28:13,930 --> 00:28:15,463 SUBSTANTIAL THAT A 1072 00:28:15,532 --> 00:28:16,697 CHOCOLATE BAR BOUGHT IN THE 1073 00:28:16,766 --> 00:28:17,598 UNITED STATES IS THE PRODUCT OF 1074 00:28:17,667 --> 00:28:19,300 CHILD LABOR." 1075 00:28:19,369 --> 00:28:20,501 IN FACT, THE PERSISTENCE OF IT 1076 00:28:20,570 --> 00:28:21,636 IN THE SUPPLY 1077 00:28:21,705 --> 00:28:23,538 CHAIN IS AN OPEN SECRET. 1078 00:28:23,607 --> 00:28:25,039 JUST WATCH AS SOME YOUNG WORKERS 1079 00:28:25,108 --> 00:28:26,307 END UP JOKING ABOUT IT, WHEN 1080 00:28:26,376 --> 00:28:26,874 ASKED BY 1081 00:28:26,943 --> 00:28:33,943 VISITING JOURNALISTS. 1082 00:28:51,067 --> 00:28:58,067 [LAUGHTER] 1083 00:28:59,409 --> 00:29:00,608 >> John: YEAH, WE ALL FONDLY 1084 00:29:00,677 --> 00:29:02,376 REMEMBER BEING 21. 1085 00:29:02,445 --> 00:29:03,644 SMALL FRAME, CHILDLIKE VOICE, 1086 00:29:03,713 --> 00:29:04,779 ANOTHER 1087 00:29:04,848 --> 00:29:05,613 GUY HAS TO CONSTANTLY REMIND YOU 1088 00:29:05,682 --> 00:29:07,081 YOU'RE 21. 1089 00:29:07,150 --> 00:29:08,015 JUST CLASSIC EARLY TWENTIES 1090 00:29:08,084 --> 00:29:09,951 STUFF. 1091 00:29:10,020 --> 00:29:11,252 AND I KNOW THEY WERE LAUGHING 1092 00:29:11,321 --> 00:29:12,286 THERE -- AND THAT CLIP WAS 1093 00:29:12,355 --> 00:29:13,020 HONESTLY KIND OF 1094 00:29:13,089 --> 00:29:14,122 CHARMING. 1095 00:29:14,191 --> 00:29:15,423 BUT THE TRUTH IS, FOR OTHERS, 1096 00:29:15,492 --> 00:29:16,791 THE STORIES ARE PRETTY HARROWING 1097 00:29:16,860 --> 00:29:17,625 -- LIKE THIS YOUNG GIRL WHO SAID 1098 00:29:17,694 --> 00:29:18,559 THAT AT THIS POINT, SHE'D 1099 00:29:18,628 --> 00:29:19,861 ALREADY BEEN FARMING COCOA FOR 1100 00:29:19,930 --> 00:29:22,430 FIVE YEARS. 1101 00:29:22,499 --> 00:29:23,531 >> I WAS BROUGHT 1102 00:29:23,600 --> 00:29:24,532 HERE BY MY AUNT, I WAS TOLD I 1103 00:29:24,601 --> 00:29:28,369 WOULD BE HELPING WITH THE BABY, 1104 00:29:28,438 --> 00:29:28,970 BUT INSTEAD I ONLY DO FARMING. 1105 00:29:29,039 --> 00:29:29,804 >> SHE SAYS SHE WANTS TO GO 1106 00:29:29,873 --> 00:29:30,772 TO SCHOOL, BUT HER UNCLE CAN'T 1107 00:29:30,841 --> 00:29:32,273 AFFORD TO SEND HER. 1108 00:29:32,342 --> 00:29:33,374 >> MY UNCLE SAYS HE STRUGGLES TO 1109 00:29:33,443 --> 00:29:35,576 PAY FOR HIS OWN CHILDREN, SO IF 1110 00:29:35,645 --> 00:29:37,044 I JOIN THEM, HE WILL NOT BE ABLE 1111 00:29:37,113 --> 00:29:38,813 TO BUY THE SCHOOL BOOKS. 1112 00:29:38,882 --> 00:29:39,847 >> WE ASKED IF SHE MISSES HER 1113 00:29:39,916 --> 00:29:40,982 FAMILY. 1114 00:29:41,051 --> 00:29:41,949 >> YES. 1115 00:29:42,018 --> 00:29:43,484 >> DO YOU HEAR FROM THEM? 1116 00:29:43,553 --> 00:29:45,353 >> NO. 1117 00:29:45,422 --> 00:29:46,487 >> HAVE YOU EVER BEEN BACK TO 1118 00:29:46,556 --> 00:29:47,955 VISIT THEM SINCE YOU CAME HERE? 1119 00:29:48,024 --> 00:29:49,624 >> NO. 1120 00:29:49,693 --> 00:29:50,792 >> John: THAT'S HEARTBREAKING. 1121 00:29:50,861 --> 00:29:51,926 AND THE TRUTH IS, THERE ARE A 1122 00:29:51,995 --> 00:29:54,061 LOT MORE CLIPS OUT THERE LIKE 1123 00:29:54,130 --> 00:29:54,962 THAT ONE THAN THERE 1124 00:29:55,031 --> 00:29:56,731 ARE OF KIDS JOKING AROUND ABOUT 1125 00:29:56,800 --> 00:29:58,032 BEING 21. 1126 00:29:58,101 --> 00:29:59,400 AND AT THIS POINT YOU MIGHT BE 1127 00:29:59,469 --> 00:30:00,301 WONDERING -- WHAT CAN WE DO 1128 00:30:00,370 --> 00:30:01,469 DIFFERENTLY? 1129 00:30:01,538 --> 00:30:02,703 WELL, I'LL ADMIT -- IT'S REALLY 1130 00:30:02,772 --> 00:30:04,105 COMPLICATED. 1131 00:30:04,174 --> 00:30:05,106 CHILD LABOR IN THESE REGIONS IS 1132 00:30:05,175 --> 00:30:05,973 CAUSED BY A MYRIAD OF ISSUES, 1133 00:30:06,042 --> 00:30:07,442 FROM POOR INFRASTRUCTURE TO 1134 00:30:07,511 --> 00:30:08,443 LIMITED ACCESS TO 1135 00:30:08,512 --> 00:30:09,444 EDUCATION. 1136 00:30:09,513 --> 00:30:11,012 BUT TO A SIGNIFICANT EXTENT, IT 1137 00:30:11,081 --> 00:30:12,980 IS CAUSED BY POVERTY. 1138 00:30:13,049 --> 00:30:15,116 A POVERTY THAT IS ACTIVELY 1139 00:30:15,185 --> 00:30:16,050 PERPETUATED BY THESE CHOCOLATE 1140 00:30:16,119 --> 00:30:17,852 COMPANIES. 1141 00:30:17,921 --> 00:30:19,153 AND IF THEY REALLY WANT TO 1142 00:30:19,222 --> 00:30:21,088 REMEDY THINGS, A GOOD FIRST STEP 1143 00:30:21,157 --> 00:30:22,223 WOULD SIMPLY BE 1144 00:30:22,292 --> 00:30:23,724 TO PAY FARMERS MORE. 1145 00:30:23,793 --> 00:30:26,694 AND COMPANIES MAY BALK AT THAT, 1146 00:30:26,763 --> 00:30:27,528 SAYING THEY DON'T SET THE PRICE, 1147 00:30:27,597 --> 00:30:28,596 THE MARKET DOES. 1148 00:30:28,665 --> 00:30:29,263 BUT AS THIS ADVOCATE POINTS OUT, 1149 00:30:29,332 --> 00:30:29,497 THAT'S A 1150 00:30:29,566 --> 00:30:30,698 PRETTY LOUSY EXCUSE. 1151 00:30:30,767 --> 00:30:32,533 >> EVERY TRADER AND EVERY 1152 00:30:32,602 --> 00:30:34,802 MULTINATIONAL I SPEAK TO ALWAYS 1153 00:30:34,871 --> 00:30:35,670 SAY, BUT THAT'S THE WORLD MARKET 1154 00:30:35,739 --> 00:30:36,637 PRICE. 1155 00:30:36,706 --> 00:30:37,505 WE HAVE NO INFLUENCE ON 1156 00:30:37,574 --> 00:30:38,973 THAT AT ALL. 1157 00:30:39,042 --> 00:30:41,209 BUT YOU BUY A QUARTER 1158 00:30:41,278 --> 00:30:42,643 OF THE WORLD'S COCOA BEANS. 1159 00:30:42,712 --> 00:30:43,511 HOW CAN YOU NOT INFLUENCE THE 1160 00:30:43,580 --> 00:30:44,679 PRICE? 1161 00:30:44,748 --> 00:30:45,680 >> John: EXACTLY. 1162 00:30:45,749 --> 00:30:47,915 AND LOOK, I'M NO ECONOMIST, 1163 00:30:47,984 --> 00:30:48,983 DESPITE WINNING "MOST LIKELY TO 1164 00:30:49,052 --> 00:30:49,650 BE AN ECONOMIST, 1165 00:30:49,719 --> 00:30:51,252 BASED ON APPEARANCE" BACK IN 1166 00:30:51,321 --> 00:30:53,354 PRESCHOOL. 1167 00:30:53,423 --> 00:30:54,489 BUT IF YOU BUY THAT MUCH OF THE 1168 00:30:54,558 --> 00:30:55,490 GLOBAL SUPPLY IN SOMETHING, YOU 1169 00:30:55,559 --> 00:30:56,924 DEFINITELY HAVE SOME SWAY OVER 1170 00:30:56,993 --> 00:30:59,660 HOW MUCH IT COSTS. 1171 00:30:59,729 --> 00:31:00,561 AND THE THING IS, THERE ARE 1172 00:31:00,630 --> 00:31:01,295 MODELS HERE COMPANIES COULD LOOK 1173 00:31:01,364 --> 00:31:02,563 TO. 1174 00:31:02,632 --> 00:31:04,132 REMEMBER THAT DUTCH JOURNALIST 1175 00:31:04,201 --> 00:31:05,133 MAKING THE GUY FROM 1176 00:31:05,202 --> 00:31:06,834 NESTLE SQUIRM? 1177 00:31:06,903 --> 00:31:07,735 AS A RESULT OF THAT SEGMENT, HE 1178 00:31:07,804 --> 00:31:08,436 ACTUALLY CREATED HIS OWN 1179 00:31:08,505 --> 00:31:09,804 CHOCOLATE COMPANY, 1180 00:31:09,873 --> 00:31:11,873 TONY'S CHOCOLONELY. 1181 00:31:11,942 --> 00:31:13,174 IT WORKS HARD TO ENSURE ITS 1182 00:31:13,243 --> 00:31:14,809 SUPPLY CHAIN IS FREE FROM CHILD 1183 00:31:14,878 --> 00:31:16,744 OR SLAVE LABOR. 1184 00:31:16,813 --> 00:31:17,845 AND -- IMPORTANTLY -- ENSURES 1185 00:31:17,914 --> 00:31:18,846 THAT THE PEOPLE WHO GROW ITS 1186 00:31:18,915 --> 00:31:19,680 COCOA AREN'T IN 1187 00:31:19,749 --> 00:31:21,015 DIRE POVERTY. 1188 00:31:21,084 --> 00:31:22,550 HERE'S ITS FORMER HEAD OF 1189 00:31:22,619 --> 00:31:23,651 SUSTAINABILITY, EXPLAINING HOW 1190 00:31:23,720 --> 00:31:24,786 IT SETS THE PRICE FOR THE 1191 00:31:24,855 --> 00:31:26,587 BEANS THAT IT BUYS. 1192 00:31:26,656 --> 00:31:28,790 >> WE CALCULATE HOW 1193 00:31:28,859 --> 00:31:29,423 BIG THE GAP IS BETWEEN WITH THE 1194 00:31:29,492 --> 00:31:30,024 GOVERNMENT SET PRICE, AND THE 1195 00:31:30,093 --> 00:31:31,559 LIVING INCOME PRICE, AND WE PAY 1196 00:31:31,628 --> 00:31:34,395 THAT GAP AS AN EXTRA PREMIUM. 1197 00:31:34,464 --> 00:31:36,030 >> FOR THE SPRING HARVEST THE 1198 00:31:36,099 --> 00:31:37,965 PREMIUM WAS ABOUT $63 HIGHER 1199 00:31:38,034 --> 00:31:39,467 THAN WHAT'S SET BY THE 1200 00:31:39,536 --> 00:31:40,768 GOVERNMENT, MEANING TONY'S PAID 1201 00:31:40,837 --> 00:31:41,369 ALMOST DOUBLE FOR EACH BAG OF 1202 00:31:41,438 --> 00:31:43,838 BEANS. 1203 00:31:43,907 --> 00:31:45,440 >> John: THAT'S GREAT. 1204 00:31:45,509 --> 00:31:47,008 AND IT SAYS SOMETHING THAT 1205 00:31:47,077 --> 00:31:48,376 TONY'S WERE SOMEHOW ABLE TO PAY 1206 00:31:48,445 --> 00:31:49,977 FARMERS DOUBLE 1207 00:31:50,046 --> 00:31:50,945 THE GOING RATE, DESPITE BEING A 1208 00:31:51,014 --> 00:31:52,814 MID-SIZE DUTCH COCOA COMPANY 1209 00:31:52,883 --> 00:31:54,081 WHOSE LOGO, BY THE WAY, LOOKS 1210 00:31:54,150 --> 00:31:55,883 LIKE A CASUAL DINING RESTAURANT 1211 00:31:55,952 --> 00:31:56,484 OPERATED BY-AND-FOR 1212 00:31:56,553 --> 00:31:58,719 CLOWNS. 1213 00:31:58,788 --> 00:32:01,155 IF THESE GUYS CAN DO IT, THERE'S 1214 00:32:01,224 --> 00:32:03,157 FRANKLY NO REASON WHY THESE 1215 00:32:03,226 --> 00:32:05,126 CAN'T AS WELL. 1216 00:32:05,195 --> 00:32:05,927 AND TO BE FAIR, EVEN TONY'S OWN 1217 00:32:05,996 --> 00:32:06,727 WEBSITE ADMITS THE SCALE OF THE 1218 00:32:06,796 --> 00:32:08,029 CHALLENGE HERE, 1219 00:32:08,098 --> 00:32:09,063 SAYING, "WE HAVE NEVER FOUND AN 1220 00:32:09,132 --> 00:32:10,331 INSTANCE OF MODERN SLAVERY IN 1221 00:32:10,400 --> 00:32:12,467 OUR SUPPLY CHAIN, HOWEVER, WE DO 1222 00:32:12,536 --> 00:32:14,168 NOT GUARANTEE OUR 1223 00:32:14,237 --> 00:32:16,204 CHOCOLATE IS 100% SLAVE FREE. 1224 00:32:16,273 --> 00:32:17,538 WHILE WE ARE DOING EVERYTHING WE 1225 00:32:17,607 --> 00:32:19,040 CAN TO PREVENT SLAVERY AND CHILD 1226 00:32:19,109 --> 00:32:21,075 LABOR, WE ARE ALSO REALISTIC." 1227 00:32:21,144 --> 00:32:22,743 AND I HAVE TO SAY, I APPRECIATE 1228 00:32:22,812 --> 00:32:23,778 THAT -- 1229 00:32:23,847 --> 00:32:24,545 BECAUSE THERE IS A DIFFERENCE 1230 00:32:24,614 --> 00:32:25,480 BETWEEN 1231 00:32:25,549 --> 00:32:26,247 RECOGNIZING HOW MUCH THERE IS TO 1232 00:32:26,316 --> 00:32:27,949 DO, AND SIMPLY NOT DOING ENOUGH. 1233 00:32:28,018 --> 00:32:30,818 AND I KNOW THESE ARE COMPANIES, 1234 00:32:30,887 --> 00:32:31,953 NOT CHARITIES, WHOSE JOB IT IS 1235 00:32:32,022 --> 00:32:33,254 TO MAKE MONEY, 1236 00:32:33,323 --> 00:32:34,455 NOT SAVE THE WORLD. 1237 00:32:34,524 --> 00:32:35,990 BUT THAT MEANS THAT THEY'LL ONLY 1238 00:32:36,059 --> 00:32:37,191 CARE ABOUT THIS PROBLEM EXACTLY 1239 00:32:37,260 --> 00:32:39,160 AS MUCH AS THEY ARE FORCED TO. 1240 00:32:39,229 --> 00:32:40,995 SO IF WE'RE SERIOUS ABOUT 1241 00:32:41,064 --> 00:32:42,830 GETTING CHILD LABOR OUT OF OUR 1242 00:32:42,899 --> 00:32:43,998 CHOCOLATE, WE CAN'T 1243 00:32:44,067 --> 00:32:46,567 KEEP RELYING ON PINKY PROMISES 1244 00:32:46,636 --> 00:32:48,903 AND THE HONOR SYSTEM -- WE NEED 1245 00:32:48,972 --> 00:32:50,037 TOUGH LEGISLATION THAT REQUIRES 1246 00:32:50,106 --> 00:32:52,106 COMPANIES TO DO THE RIGHT THING. 1247 00:32:52,175 --> 00:32:53,274 AND IT'S NOT LIKE THIS IS THE 1248 00:32:53,343 --> 00:32:54,609 ONLY INDUSTRY 1249 00:32:54,678 --> 00:32:56,077 WHERE EXPLOITATION IN OTHER 1250 00:32:56,146 --> 00:32:57,245 COUNTRIES IS THE NORM -- I COULD 1251 00:32:57,314 --> 00:32:58,579 JUST AS EASILY HAVE 1252 00:32:58,648 --> 00:32:59,347 DONE THIS PIECE ABOUT COFFEE, OR 1253 00:32:59,416 --> 00:33:00,581 PALM OIL. 1254 00:33:00,650 --> 00:33:03,317 AND WE ACTUALLY TALKED ABOUT 1255 00:33:03,386 --> 00:33:03,918 TRAFFICKING AND CHILD LABOR IN 1256 00:33:03,987 --> 00:33:06,087 THE US FARM SYSTEM THIS YEAR. 1257 00:33:06,156 --> 00:33:07,622 BUT EXPERTS THEMSELVES SAY OF 1258 00:33:07,691 --> 00:33:10,057 CHOCOLATE, IN FEW INDUSTRIES IS 1259 00:33:10,126 --> 00:33:11,692 THE EVIDENCE OF OBJECTIONABLE 1260 00:33:11,761 --> 00:33:12,860 PRACTICES SO CLEAR, THE 1261 00:33:12,929 --> 00:33:14,896 INDUSTRY'S PLEDGES TO REFORM SO 1262 00:33:14,965 --> 00:33:16,097 AMBITIOUS AND THE BREACHING OF 1263 00:33:16,166 --> 00:33:18,366 THOSE PROMISES SO OBVIOUS. 1264 00:33:18,435 --> 00:33:20,301 LOOK, WE'VE KNOWN FOR 20 YEARS 1265 00:33:20,370 --> 00:33:22,370 WHAT THE PROBLEMS ARE HERE, AND 1266 00:33:22,439 --> 00:33:23,738 WE HAVEN'T BOTHERED TO FIX THEM. 1267 00:33:23,807 --> 00:33:25,039 BUT IF WE DO, THEN IMAGINE THIS, 1268 00:33:25,108 --> 00:33:27,141 ONE DAY, MAYBE, JUST MAYBE, WE 1269 00:33:27,210 --> 00:33:28,743 CAN GET BACK TO A 1270 00:33:28,812 --> 00:33:30,044 POINT WHERE CHOCOLATE CAN ONCE 1271 00:33:30,113 --> 00:33:31,979 MORE GIVE US THE SIMPLE 1272 00:33:32,048 --> 00:33:32,713 UNCOMPLICATED JOY OF 1273 00:33:32,782 --> 00:33:39,187 THIS. 1274 00:33:39,256 --> 00:33:39,587 >> John: EXACTLY. 1275 00:33:39,656 --> 00:33:45,827 AND NOW THIS. 1276 00:33:45,896 --> 00:33:47,929 >> Announcer: AND NOW, LOCAL 1277 00:33:47,998 --> 00:33:48,563 LAW ENFORCEMENT AGENCIES GO ALL 1278 00:33:48,632 --> 00:33:51,599 OUT WITH THEIR SAFETY PSA'S. 1279 00:33:51,668 --> 00:33:53,034 >> HI, EVERYBODY. 1280 00:33:53,103 --> 00:33:55,803 THIS IS CANINE SAM WITH SOME 1281 00:33:55,872 --> 00:33:58,506 HALLOWEEN SAFETY TIPS. 1282 00:33:58,575 --> 00:34:00,308 >> SOME SAFETY TIPS FOR THE 1283 00:34:00,377 --> 00:34:05,246 UPCOMING HALLOWEEN. 1284 00:34:05,315 --> 00:34:06,380 IT IS GOING TO BE ON 1285 00:34:06,449 --> 00:34:06,714 OCTOBER 31ST. 1286 00:34:06,783 --> 00:34:08,049 WE ARE GOING TO CELEBRATE FROM 1287 00:34:08,118 --> 00:34:08,783 SIX TO 8:00 P.M. 1288 00:34:08,852 --> 00:34:09,183 >> NEVER, EVER -- 1289 00:34:09,252 --> 00:34:10,251 >> ENTER THE HOME OF SOMEBODY 1290 00:34:10,320 --> 00:34:12,186 THAT YOU DO NOT KNOW. 1291 00:34:12,255 --> 00:34:13,988 >> USE THE BUDDY SYSTEM AND GO 1292 00:34:14,057 --> 00:34:19,594 TRICK-OR-TREATING WITH FRIENDS. 1293 00:34:19,663 --> 00:34:20,361 >> BE CAREFUL WHERE YOU ARE 1294 00:34:20,430 --> 00:34:22,697 CROSSING THE STREETS. 1295 00:34:22,766 --> 00:34:23,798 ♪ ♪ 1296 00:34:23,867 --> 00:34:26,267 >> WHEN YOU'RE CROSSING THE ROAD 1297 00:34:26,336 --> 00:34:27,201 MAKE SURE YOU ARE LOOKING BOTH 1298 00:34:27,270 --> 00:34:29,270 WAYS BEFORE YOU CROSS. 1299 00:34:29,339 --> 00:34:30,171 >> IF YOU SEE SOMETHING 1300 00:34:30,240 --> 00:34:31,239 SUSPICIOUS MAKE SURE TO GIVE US 1301 00:34:31,308 --> 00:34:38,308 A CALL. 1302 00:34:39,216 --> 00:34:40,348 [LAUGHTER] 1303 00:34:40,417 --> 00:34:41,482 >> PLEASE DO NOT INVITE THE KIDS 1304 00:34:41,551 --> 00:34:43,718 INSIDE THE HOUSE. 1305 00:34:43,787 --> 00:34:45,920 >> SOME THINGS THAT PARENTS CAN 1306 00:34:45,989 --> 00:34:46,888 DO WHEN TAKING THEIR KIDS 1307 00:34:46,957 --> 00:34:51,092 TRICK-OR-TREATING. 1308 00:34:51,161 --> 00:34:54,095 >> KEEP OUR KIDS SAFE AND HAVE A 1309 00:34:54,164 --> 00:34:56,464 GREAT HALLOWEEN. 1310 00:34:56,533 --> 00:35:03,533 ♪ ♪ 1311 00:35:15,519 --> 00:35:16,317 >> John: THAT IS OUR SHOW. 1312 00:35:16,386 --> 00:35:17,185 THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR WATCHING. 1313 00:35:17,254 --> 00:35:18,252 WE WILL SEE YOU NEXT WEEK. 1314 00:35:18,321 --> 00:35:23,658 GOOD NIGHT. 1315 00:35:23,727 --> 00:35:24,125 [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] 1316 00:35:24,194 --> 00:35:39,176 ♪ ♪ 1317 00:35:40,844 --> 00:35:41,677 ♪ ♪