1 00:00:04,433 --> 00:00:11,433 ♪ ♪ 2 00:00:20,333 --> 00:00:27,333 ♪ ♪ 3 00:00:28,533 --> 00:00:30,633 [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] 4 00:00:30,633 --> 00:00:32,400 John: WELCOME, WELCOME, 5 00:00:32,400 --> 00:00:34,733 WELCOME TO "LAST WEEK TONIGHT!" 6 00:00:34,733 --> 00:00:35,400 I'M JOHN OLIVER. 7 00:00:35,400 --> 00:00:36,000 THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR JOINING 8 00:00:36,000 --> 00:00:38,466 US. 9 00:00:38,466 --> 00:00:39,500 IT HAS BEEN A BUSY WEEK. 10 00:00:39,500 --> 00:00:40,066 KING CHARLES UNVEILED THIS 11 00:00:40,066 --> 00:00:40,866 OFFICIAL PORTRAIT, DEPICTING HIM 12 00:00:40,866 --> 00:00:43,166 BEING CONSUMED BY THE SCARLET 13 00:00:43,166 --> 00:00:45,733 FIRES OF HELL. 14 00:00:45,733 --> 00:00:47,866 A PORTAL PROVIDING LIVE VIDEO 15 00:00:47,966 --> 00:00:48,700 BETWEEN NEW YORK AND DUBLIN WAS 16 00:00:48,800 --> 00:00:50,233 TEMPORARILY SHUT DOWN AFTER, 17 00:00:50,233 --> 00:00:51,800 AMONG OTHER THINGS, SOMEONE 18 00:00:51,800 --> 00:00:52,433 FLASHED IT, WHICH OF COURSE THEY 19 00:00:52,433 --> 00:00:55,300 DID. 20 00:00:55,300 --> 00:00:56,200 AND ALL AROUND THE COUNTRY, 21 00:00:56,200 --> 00:00:56,733 THERE'VE BEEN GRADUATION 22 00:00:56,733 --> 00:00:57,733 CEREMONIES. 23 00:00:57,733 --> 00:00:59,966 THEY'VE BEEN A LITTLE CHAOTIC 24 00:00:59,966 --> 00:01:00,566 THIS YEAR, BOTH BECAUSE OF THE 25 00:01:00,566 --> 00:01:01,433 CONTINUING PROTESTS OVER GAZA, 26 00:01:01,433 --> 00:01:02,733 BUT ALSO FOR WEIRDER REASONS, 27 00:01:02,733 --> 00:01:03,633 LIKE AN ANNOUNCER AT THOMAS 28 00:01:03,633 --> 00:01:05,500 JEFFERSON UNIVERSITY'S 29 00:01:05,500 --> 00:01:06,566 GRADUATION STRUGGLING TO 30 00:01:06,566 --> 00:01:07,566 PRONOUNCE SOME PRETTY COMMON 31 00:01:07,566 --> 00:01:11,433 NAMES. 32 00:01:11,433 --> 00:01:12,566 MEGHAN LOUISE AUBREY. 33 00:01:12,566 --> 00:01:17,433 MAEVE ELIZABETH BROSTOSKI. 34 00:01:17,433 --> 00:01:23,833 SARAH VIRGINIA BRENNAN. 35 00:01:23,833 --> 00:01:25,233 MOLLY ELIZABETH CAMP. 36 00:01:25,233 --> 00:01:28,466 TA-MOO-MAY-- 37 00:01:28,466 --> 00:01:29,733 THOMAS. 38 00:01:29,733 --> 00:01:36,666 THOMAS! 39 00:01:36,666 --> 00:01:37,466 John: THAT IS MAGNIFICENT. 40 00:01:37,466 --> 00:01:38,100 MISPRONOUNCING THOMAS AT THOMAS 41 00:01:38,100 --> 00:01:38,733 JEFFERSON UNIVERSITY IS ALREADY 42 00:01:38,733 --> 00:01:41,600 SPECTACULAR. 43 00:01:41,600 --> 00:01:43,300 AND THE SCHOOL EXPLAINED THAT 44 00:01:43,300 --> 00:01:44,700 THE PROBLEM WAS, THE NAMES HAD 45 00:01:44,700 --> 00:01:45,833 BEEN SPELLED PHONETICALLY-- FOR 46 00:01:45,833 --> 00:01:47,733 INSTANCE, THIS WAS THE CARD FOR 47 00:01:47,733 --> 00:01:48,566 "SARAH VIRGINIA BRENNAN." 48 00:01:48,566 --> 00:01:50,233 AND WHILE PROVIDING PHONETIC 49 00:01:50,233 --> 00:01:51,466 PRONUNCIATIONS IS FAIRLY 50 00:01:51,466 --> 00:01:52,733 COMMONPLACE FOR GRADUATIONS, 51 00:01:52,733 --> 00:01:53,900 WHAT ISN'T IS LOOKING AT THE 52 00:01:54,000 --> 00:01:54,566 PRONUNCIATION, PANICKING, 53 00:01:54,666 --> 00:01:57,100 SWALLOWING YOUR OWN TONGUE, AND 54 00:01:57,100 --> 00:01:57,666 THEN ATTEMPTING TO REINVENT 55 00:01:57,666 --> 00:02:00,200 WELSH. 56 00:02:00,200 --> 00:02:00,700 BUT THAT WASN'T EVEN THE 57 00:02:00,700 --> 00:02:01,333 WEIRDEST COLLEGE GRADUATION THIS 58 00:02:01,333 --> 00:02:02,100 YEAR. 59 00:02:02,100 --> 00:02:03,933 AT BENEDICTINE COLLEGE IN KANSAS 60 00:02:03,933 --> 00:02:05,833 THE KICKER FOR THE KANSAS CITY 61 00:02:05,833 --> 00:02:07,000 CHIEFS WENT ON AN ANTISEMITIC, 62 00:02:07,000 --> 00:02:08,166 ANTI-GAY, ANTI-TRANS RANT, IN 63 00:02:08,166 --> 00:02:09,233 WHICH HE ALSO TOLD WOMEN TO 64 00:02:09,233 --> 00:02:10,833 "EMBRACE ONE OF THE MOST 65 00:02:10,833 --> 00:02:13,933 IMPORTANT TITLES OF ALL, 66 00:02:13,933 --> 00:02:15,400 HOMEMAKER," WHICH IS ESPECIALLY 67 00:02:15,400 --> 00:02:16,400 WILD, COMING FROM SOMEONE WHOSE 68 00:02:16,400 --> 00:02:17,300 OWN MOTHER IS, AND THIS IS TRUE, 69 00:02:17,300 --> 00:02:20,033 A PHYSICIST SPECIALIZING IN 70 00:02:20,033 --> 00:02:20,800 "BRACHYTHERAPY AND GAMMA KNIFE 71 00:02:20,800 --> 00:02:24,000 MEDICAL PHYSICS CARE." 72 00:02:24,000 --> 00:02:24,766 BUT I GUESS HE'S RIGHT, HER MOST 73 00:02:24,766 --> 00:02:26,200 IMPORTANT JOB WAS RAISING THIS 74 00:02:26,200 --> 00:02:29,666 ABSOLUTE HAM SANDWICH OF A MAN. 75 00:02:29,666 --> 00:02:32,633 MEANWHILE, OHIO STATE HAD THIS 76 00:02:32,633 --> 00:02:33,566 "SOCIAL ENTREPRENEUR" RAMBLE 77 00:02:33,566 --> 00:02:35,866 THROUGH A SPEECH HE ADMITTED 78 00:02:35,866 --> 00:02:37,500 HE'D TAKEN AYUHUASCA TO WRITE, 79 00:02:37,500 --> 00:02:38,666 IN WHICH HE GAVE THE AUDIENCE 80 00:02:38,666 --> 00:02:40,533 ADVICE ABOUT INVESTING IN 81 00:02:40,533 --> 00:02:40,766 BITCOIN. 82 00:02:40,766 --> 00:02:42,133 AND JUST TODAY, MOREHOUSE 83 00:02:42,133 --> 00:02:43,566 COLLEGE HAD JOE BIDEN AS THEIR 84 00:02:43,566 --> 00:02:44,866 COMMENCEMENT SPEAKER, AND WHILE 85 00:02:44,866 --> 00:02:45,933 AS OF TAPING THAT HASN'T 86 00:02:45,933 --> 00:02:48,200 HAPPENED YET, I'M SURE IT WENT 87 00:02:48,200 --> 00:02:50,566 GREAT. 88 00:02:50,566 --> 00:02:51,200 AND LOOK, COMMENCEMENT SPEECHES 89 00:02:51,200 --> 00:02:53,366 ARE HARD. 90 00:02:53,366 --> 00:02:54,766 THAT'S WHY I'VE NEVER DONE ONE, 91 00:02:54,766 --> 00:02:56,666 NO MATTER HOW MANY TIMES 92 00:02:56,666 --> 00:02:59,433 HOGWARTS ASKS ME TO. 93 00:02:59,433 --> 00:03:02,366 STOP SENDING ME FUCKING OWLS. 94 00:03:02,466 --> 00:03:03,666 BUT THEY DON'T NEED TO BE AN 95 00:03:03,666 --> 00:03:04,800 ABSOLUTE DISASTER. 96 00:03:04,800 --> 00:03:06,433 AND PERHAPS THE WILDEST CHOICE 97 00:03:06,433 --> 00:03:07,400 FOR SPEAKER THIS YEAR CAME FROM 98 00:03:07,400 --> 00:03:08,500 D'YOUVILLE UNIVERSITY IN 99 00:03:08,500 --> 00:03:09,200 BUFFALO, WHOSE GRADUATION 100 00:03:09,200 --> 00:03:11,266 SPEAKER WAS... 101 00:03:11,266 --> 00:03:12,066 THIS. 102 00:03:12,066 --> 00:03:13,700 CONGRATULATIONS TO ALL THE 103 00:03:13,700 --> 00:03:14,733 GRADUATING STUDENTS. 104 00:03:14,733 --> 00:03:17,266 I OFFER YOU THE FOLLOWING 105 00:03:17,266 --> 00:03:18,400 INSPIRATIONAL ADVICE THAT IS 106 00:03:18,400 --> 00:03:18,900 COMMON AT ALL GRADUATION 107 00:03:18,900 --> 00:03:20,733 CEREMONIES. 108 00:03:20,733 --> 00:03:22,200 EMBRACE LIFELONG LEARNING. 109 00:03:22,200 --> 00:03:22,866 BE ADAPTABLE. 110 00:03:22,866 --> 00:03:24,533 PURSUE YOUR PASSIONS. 111 00:03:24,533 --> 00:03:25,266 TAKE RISKS. 112 00:03:25,266 --> 00:03:27,633 FOSTER MEANINGFUL CONNECTIONS. 113 00:03:27,633 --> 00:03:28,900 MAKE A POSITIVE IMPACT. 114 00:03:28,900 --> 00:03:30,633 AND BELIEVE IN YOURSELF. 115 00:03:30,633 --> 00:03:33,133 John: YEAH, THEY HAD A ROBOT 116 00:03:33,133 --> 00:03:33,666 ADDRESS THEIR GRADUATING 117 00:03:33,666 --> 00:03:36,200 STUDENTS, WITH REMARKS COMPOSED 118 00:03:36,200 --> 00:03:36,700 BY AI. 119 00:03:36,700 --> 00:03:38,733 AND I'M SURE STUDENTS WILL 120 00:03:38,733 --> 00:03:40,266 REMEMBER THOSE STIRRING WORDS AS 121 00:03:40,266 --> 00:03:42,233 ROBOTS TAKE ALL THEIR JOBS, 122 00:03:42,233 --> 00:03:44,133 BEFORE EVENTUALLY TRACKING THEM 123 00:03:44,133 --> 00:03:44,733 DOWN WHEN THEY'RE HIDING IN AN 124 00:03:44,733 --> 00:03:46,633 ABANDONED WAREHOUSE DURING 125 00:03:46,633 --> 00:03:48,633 HUMANITY'S FINAL HOURS. 126 00:03:48,633 --> 00:03:50,566 BUT WE'RE GOING TO MOVE ON TO 127 00:03:50,566 --> 00:03:51,166 TALK ABOUT EUROPE-- BRITAIN'S 128 00:03:51,166 --> 00:03:52,166 EX. 129 00:03:52,166 --> 00:03:53,933 IT'S HAD A TUMULTUOUS WEEK. 130 00:03:53,933 --> 00:03:55,233 SLOVAKIA'S PRIME MINISTER BARELY 131 00:03:55,233 --> 00:03:57,600 SURVIVED AN ASSASSINATION 132 00:03:57,600 --> 00:03:59,066 ATTEMPT, AND IN GERMANY, THE 133 00:03:59,066 --> 00:03:59,900 FAR-RIGHT ANTI-IMMIGRANT AFD 134 00:03:59,900 --> 00:04:02,166 PARTY HAS BEEN ON THE RISE. 135 00:04:02,166 --> 00:04:03,700 AND YES, ITS LOGO DOES LOOK LIKE 136 00:04:03,700 --> 00:04:04,766 THE NIKE SWOOSH GREW A VERY 137 00:04:04,766 --> 00:04:08,466 SHARP PENIS. 138 00:04:08,566 --> 00:04:10,300 THIS WEEK, THOUGH, THE AFD 139 00:04:10,300 --> 00:04:10,933 SUFFERED MULTIPLE SETBACKS, WITH 140 00:04:10,933 --> 00:04:12,400 ONE COURT RULING THEY'RE A 141 00:04:12,400 --> 00:04:13,000 POTENTIAL THREAT TO DEMOCRACY, 142 00:04:13,000 --> 00:04:15,266 AND ANOTHER CONVICTING ONE OF 143 00:04:15,266 --> 00:04:16,433 THEIR LEADING MEMBERS ON A 144 00:04:16,433 --> 00:04:17,833 PRETTY STRIKING CHARGE. 145 00:04:17,833 --> 00:04:19,966 A PROMINENT FIGURE IN 146 00:04:19,966 --> 00:04:21,700 GERMANY'S FAR RIGHT, ALTERNATIVE 147 00:04:21,700 --> 00:04:24,566 FOR GERMANY, AFD PARTY IS 148 00:04:24,566 --> 00:04:25,833 STANDING TRIAL FOR USING A 149 00:04:25,833 --> 00:04:28,766 BANNED NAZI-ERA SLOGAN. 150 00:04:28,766 --> 00:04:30,700 BJORN HOCKE ALLEDGLY REPEATED 151 00:04:30,700 --> 00:04:32,700 THE PHRASE "EVERYTHING FOR 152 00:04:32,700 --> 00:04:33,266 GERMANY" TWICE AT POLITICAL 153 00:04:33,266 --> 00:04:34,833 RALLIES. 154 00:04:34,833 --> 00:04:35,666 THE PHRASE WAS ONCE A MOTTO OF 155 00:04:35,666 --> 00:04:36,266 THE ORIGINAL PARAMILITARY WING 156 00:04:36,266 --> 00:04:39,800 OF THE NAZI PARTY. 157 00:04:39,800 --> 00:04:41,500 HOCKE DENIES HE WAS AWARE OF THE 158 00:04:41,600 --> 00:04:44,333 ORIGINS OF THE SLOGAN, CLAIMING 159 00:04:44,333 --> 00:04:48,100 IT IS A COMMON EVERYDAY PHRASE. 160 00:04:48,100 --> 00:04:48,666 John: YEAH, HOCKE CLAIMED 161 00:04:48,666 --> 00:04:49,200 THAT HE WAS UNAWARE THAT 162 00:04:49,200 --> 00:04:50,466 "EVERYTHING FOR GERMANY" WAS A 163 00:04:50,466 --> 00:04:51,833 NAZI SLOGAN. 164 00:04:51,833 --> 00:04:53,633 ALTHOUGH I WILL SAY, THAT'S A 165 00:04:53,633 --> 00:04:56,300 LITTLE HARD TO BELIEVE, GIVEN-- 166 00:04:56,300 --> 00:04:57,766 ONE, THOSE ARE NAZI EYES. 167 00:04:57,766 --> 00:04:59,600 AND TWO, BEFORE GOING INTO 168 00:04:59,600 --> 00:05:00,133 POLITICS, HE USED TO BE A 169 00:05:00,133 --> 00:05:01,733 HISTORY TEACHER. 170 00:05:01,733 --> 00:05:05,300 IN GERMANY. 171 00:05:05,300 --> 00:05:06,766 SO UNLESS HIS VERSION OF GERMAN 172 00:05:06,766 --> 00:05:08,133 HISTORY WENT MIDDLE AGES THEN 173 00:05:08,133 --> 00:05:09,200 18TH CENTURY THEN OTTO VON 174 00:05:09,200 --> 00:05:10,533 BISMARCK THEN "EVERYONE KIND OF 175 00:05:10,533 --> 00:05:15,133 JUST HUNG OUT FOR A WHILE" THEN 176 00:05:15,233 --> 00:05:16,033 "99 LUFTBALOONS," IT'S PRETTY 177 00:05:16,033 --> 00:05:20,366 TOUGH TO BELIEVE. 178 00:05:20,366 --> 00:05:21,366 AND I KNOW IT MIGHT SEEM WEIRD 179 00:05:21,366 --> 00:05:21,966 TO BE ON TRIAL FOR JUST SAYING 180 00:05:21,966 --> 00:05:23,933 THAT SLOGAN. 181 00:05:23,933 --> 00:05:24,766 IT'S A STARK DIFFERENCE FROM THE 182 00:05:24,766 --> 00:05:25,366 U.S., WHERE OUR CONSTITUTION 183 00:05:25,366 --> 00:05:30,200 GUARANTEES VIRTUALLY UNLIMITED 184 00:05:30,200 --> 00:05:30,800 FREEDOM OF SPEECH, EXCEPT, OF 185 00:05:30,800 --> 00:05:31,400 COURSE, WHEN THE SUPREME COURT 186 00:05:31,400 --> 00:05:32,400 DECIDES IT'S COOL FOR A PUBLIC 187 00:05:32,400 --> 00:05:33,666 UNIVERSITY TO BAN DRAG SHOWS. 188 00:05:33,666 --> 00:05:34,266 YEAH, THAT HAPPENED TWO MONTHS 189 00:05:34,266 --> 00:05:34,933 AGO. 190 00:05:34,933 --> 00:05:36,233 IT'S KIND OF SURPRISING NO ONE 191 00:05:36,233 --> 00:05:36,866 FLEW A PRIDE FLAG UPSIDE DOWN ON 192 00:05:36,866 --> 00:05:43,133 THEIR LAWN IN PROTEST. 193 00:05:43,133 --> 00:05:44,266 BUT GERMANY HAS CONSTITUTIONAL 194 00:05:44,266 --> 00:05:44,866 SAFEGUARDS DESIGNED TO PREVENT 195 00:05:44,866 --> 00:05:45,500 AUTHORITARIAN RULE, FOR REASONS 196 00:05:45,500 --> 00:05:49,333 THAT SHOULD BE OBVIOUS TO 197 00:05:49,433 --> 00:05:50,366 EVERYONE EXCEPT, I'M GUESSING, 198 00:05:50,366 --> 00:05:50,933 GERMANY'S WORST-EVER HISTORY 199 00:05:50,933 --> 00:05:51,933 TEACHER. 200 00:05:51,933 --> 00:05:52,533 AND YET, IN SPITE OF ALL THIS, 201 00:05:52,533 --> 00:05:53,633 THE AFD HAS BECOME INCREASINGLY 202 00:05:53,633 --> 00:05:54,366 POPULAR. 203 00:05:54,366 --> 00:05:56,733 IN FACT, IT'S NOW THE 2ND MOST 204 00:05:56,733 --> 00:05:57,666 POPULAR PARTY IN THE COUNTRY. 205 00:05:57,666 --> 00:06:00,466 HOCKE HIMSELF IS RUNNING TO 206 00:06:00,466 --> 00:06:01,066 BECOME PREMIER IN HIS STATE-- 207 00:06:01,066 --> 00:06:03,333 ESSENTIALLY, THE GOVERNOR-- IN 208 00:06:03,333 --> 00:06:04,500 SEPTEMBER'S REGIONAL ELECTIONS. 209 00:06:04,500 --> 00:06:05,233 AND IF HE SUCCEEDS, IT WOULD BE 210 00:06:05,233 --> 00:06:08,100 THE FIRST TIME SINCE THE END OF 211 00:06:08,100 --> 00:06:09,500 THE NAZI REGIME THAT THERE WOULD 212 00:06:09,500 --> 00:06:10,966 BE A FAR RIGHT PARTY IN CONTROL 213 00:06:10,966 --> 00:06:11,866 OF A STATE GOVERNMENT IN 214 00:06:11,866 --> 00:06:13,000 GERMANY. 215 00:06:13,000 --> 00:06:14,266 THE GROWTH OF THE AFD IS 216 00:06:14,266 --> 00:06:14,933 ALARMING. 217 00:06:14,933 --> 00:06:16,166 AND A CNN REPORTER ACTUALLY 218 00:06:16,166 --> 00:06:18,233 ATTENDED ONE OF THEIR MEETINGS, 219 00:06:18,233 --> 00:06:19,700 ALTHOUGH IN DOING SO, CHOSE TO 220 00:06:19,700 --> 00:06:20,333 REPORT ON IT IN A SLIGHTLY WEIRD 221 00:06:20,433 --> 00:06:22,400 WAY. 222 00:06:22,500 --> 00:06:24,800 PRO AND AFD CURIOUS VOTERS 223 00:06:24,800 --> 00:06:27,366 HAVE GATHERED TO HEAR FROM PARTY 224 00:06:27,366 --> 00:06:28,000 OFFICIALS, THE MESSAGE EVEN HAS 225 00:06:28,000 --> 00:06:30,966 TRUMPIAN UNDERTONES. 226 00:06:30,966 --> 00:06:38,033 OUR COUNTRY FIRST, POSTERS SAY. 227 00:06:41,600 --> 00:06:42,766 PART OF THE AFD PULL FOR VOTERS 228 00:06:42,766 --> 00:06:43,400 IS ABOUT LURING PEOPLE AWAY FROM 229 00:06:43,400 --> 00:06:43,933 SOME OF GERMANY'S LARGEST 230 00:06:43,933 --> 00:06:44,466 POLITICAL PARTIES THROUGH 231 00:06:44,466 --> 00:06:44,933 TRANSPARENCY THEY SAY. 232 00:06:44,933 --> 00:06:45,433 BUT SOME OF WHAT'S BEING 233 00:06:45,433 --> 00:06:45,966 DISCUSSED IN THIS ROOM IS 234 00:06:45,966 --> 00:06:47,766 WARPED, QUESTIONING THINGS LIKE 235 00:06:47,766 --> 00:06:49,033 THE COVID PANDEMIC AND WHETHER 236 00:06:49,033 --> 00:06:51,466 CLIMATE CHANGE IS EVEN REAL. 237 00:06:51,466 --> 00:06:52,933 John: TOTALLY AGREE, IT'S ALL 238 00:06:52,933 --> 00:06:54,766 VERY UPSETTING, BUT-- DID IT 239 00:06:54,866 --> 00:06:56,533 EVER CROSS YOUR MIND TO REPORT 240 00:06:56,533 --> 00:06:59,166 ON THAT FROM, LIKE, OUTSIDE? 241 00:06:59,166 --> 00:07:00,500 THEY CAN HEAR YOU! 242 00:07:00,500 --> 00:07:02,500 YOUR ONSCREEN CAPTION MIGHT AS 243 00:07:02,500 --> 00:07:04,100 WELL HAVE SAID, "GULLIBLE 244 00:07:04,100 --> 00:07:04,666 DIPSHITS IN HERE DON'T EVEN 245 00:07:04,666 --> 00:07:06,333 REALIZE I'M TALKING ABOUT THEM." 246 00:07:06,333 --> 00:07:08,766 I KNOW THESE ARE FAMOUSLY PRETTY 247 00:07:08,766 --> 00:07:10,133 INTOLERANT PEOPLE, BUT EVEN I 248 00:07:10,133 --> 00:07:10,700 HAVE TO ADMIT, THEY'RE BEING 249 00:07:10,700 --> 00:07:12,233 SURPRISINGLY CHILL ABOUT SOMEONE 250 00:07:12,233 --> 00:07:12,866 SHIT-TALKING THEM DURING THEIR 251 00:07:12,866 --> 00:07:15,300 MEETING. 252 00:07:15,300 --> 00:07:16,766 THAT SAID, AFD SUPPORTERS DO 253 00:07:16,766 --> 00:07:19,166 HOLD SOME DEEPLY WORRYING VIEWS. 254 00:07:19,166 --> 00:07:20,800 I'M GLAD THAT SOMEONE IS 255 00:07:20,800 --> 00:07:24,633 TAKING CARE OF ALL THIS SCUM 256 00:07:24,633 --> 00:07:25,266 THAT HAS SPREAD IN THIS COUNTRY, 257 00:07:25,266 --> 00:07:27,266 IN OUR BEAUTIFUL GERMANY. 258 00:07:27,266 --> 00:07:27,866 IF BEING FAR RIGHT MEANS 259 00:07:27,866 --> 00:07:29,266 LIVING MY LIFE AS I'VE DONE SO 260 00:07:29,266 --> 00:07:30,500 FAR AT 68 THAT IS STUDYING, 261 00:07:30,500 --> 00:07:33,966 WORKING, PAYING MY TAXES, NEVER 262 00:07:33,966 --> 00:07:35,366 DOING ANYTHING WRONG, THEN BEING 263 00:07:35,366 --> 00:07:36,433 FAR RIGHT OR BEING A NAZI CANNOT 264 00:07:36,433 --> 00:07:38,500 BE SOMETHING WRONG. 265 00:07:38,500 --> 00:07:40,533 John: OKAY, BUT THAT'S VERY 266 00:07:40,533 --> 00:07:41,133 MUCH NOT WHAT BEING FAR RIGHT 267 00:07:41,133 --> 00:07:41,666 MEANS. 268 00:07:41,666 --> 00:07:43,633 LOTS OF PEOPLE ARE 68, WORKING, 269 00:07:43,633 --> 00:07:44,900 AND PAYING TAXES, AND I'D 270 00:07:44,900 --> 00:07:45,533 VENTURE TO SAY MOST OF THEM ARE 271 00:07:45,533 --> 00:07:48,333 NOT NAZI ENTHUSIASTS, OTHER 272 00:07:48,333 --> 00:07:50,066 THAN, IT SEEMS, YOU AND MEL 273 00:07:50,066 --> 00:07:51,666 GIBSON. 274 00:07:51,666 --> 00:07:53,166 THE AFD PUSHES HARDLINE 275 00:07:53,166 --> 00:07:55,333 ANTI-IMMIGRANT, ANTI-MUSLIM 276 00:07:55,333 --> 00:07:55,966 POLICIES AND PROMOTES "A RETURN 277 00:07:55,966 --> 00:07:58,200 TO TRADITIONAL GERMAN CULTURE." 278 00:07:58,200 --> 00:08:00,333 IN 2017, THE PARTY'S MANIFESTO 279 00:08:00,433 --> 00:08:02,033 SAID "ISLAM DOES NOT BELONG TO 280 00:08:02,133 --> 00:08:03,866 GERMANY," AND THAT SAME YEAR, IT 281 00:08:03,866 --> 00:08:05,366 RAN THIS AD, WHICH TRANSLATES 282 00:08:05,366 --> 00:08:06,800 TO, "BURKAS? 283 00:08:06,800 --> 00:08:08,266 WE LIKE BIKINIS." 284 00:08:08,266 --> 00:08:09,400 WHICH IS THE SLOGAN YOU GET IF 285 00:08:09,400 --> 00:08:12,166 YOU COMBINE THE HORNINESS OF A 286 00:08:12,166 --> 00:08:13,100 "FEMALE BODY INSPECTOR" T-SHIRT 287 00:08:13,100 --> 00:08:14,400 WITH THE ISLAMOPHOBIA OF THE 288 00:08:14,400 --> 00:08:17,100 ACTUAL FBI. 289 00:08:17,100 --> 00:08:19,700 THOUGH IT'S PRETTY CLEAR ALL 290 00:08:19,700 --> 00:08:20,466 THAT TALK OF LOVING "GERMAN 291 00:08:20,466 --> 00:08:21,833 TRADITIONS" IS JUST A DOG 292 00:08:21,833 --> 00:08:23,766 WHISTLE-- ESPECIALLY WHEN YOU 293 00:08:23,766 --> 00:08:25,633 DISCOVER JUST HOW LITTLE SOME OF 294 00:08:25,633 --> 00:08:26,200 THEM SEEM TO KNOW ABOUT THE 295 00:08:26,200 --> 00:08:28,533 CULTURE THEY'RE CELEBRATING. 296 00:08:28,533 --> 00:08:29,066 JUST WATCH AS AN AFD PARTY 297 00:08:29,066 --> 00:08:31,333 LEADER WAS CAUGHT COMPLETELY OFF 298 00:08:31,333 --> 00:08:34,200 GUARD BY A LITERAL CHILD. 299 00:08:34,300 --> 00:08:38,266 WE WOULD LIKE TO SEE MORE 300 00:08:38,266 --> 00:08:39,366 GERMAN FOLK SONGS TAUGHT AND 301 00:08:39,366 --> 00:08:40,933 MORE GERMAN POEMS TAUGHT. 302 00:08:40,933 --> 00:08:41,533 THAT WE APPRECIATE OUR GERMAN 303 00:08:41,533 --> 00:08:42,166 THINKERS AND POETS MORE IN THE 304 00:08:42,166 --> 00:08:42,400 SCHOOLS. 305 00:08:42,400 --> 00:08:43,666 I THINK WE ALREADY HAVE TO 306 00:08:43,666 --> 00:08:46,466 MEMORIZE QUITE A LOT OF POETRY. 307 00:08:46,466 --> 00:08:47,200 WHAT'S YOUR FAVORITE POEM, 308 00:08:47,200 --> 00:08:48,766 ACTUALLY? 309 00:08:48,766 --> 00:08:49,600 YOUR FAVORITE GERMAN ONE? 310 00:08:49,600 --> 00:08:52,633 MY FAVORITE POEM... 311 00:08:52,633 --> 00:08:54,800 IS, UMM... 312 00:08:54,800 --> 00:08:55,366 I'D HAVE TO THINK ABOUT IT. 313 00:08:55,366 --> 00:08:56,200 CAN'T REMEMBER ANY AT THE 314 00:08:56,200 --> 00:08:57,600 MOMENT. 315 00:08:57,600 --> 00:08:58,000 NONE? 316 00:08:58,000 --> 00:09:00,166 NO. 317 00:09:00,166 --> 00:09:02,133 John: WOW, GOOD FOR THAT KID. 318 00:09:02,133 --> 00:09:02,933 DISMANTLING A POLITICIAN WHILE 319 00:09:02,933 --> 00:09:05,133 ALSO MANAGING TO COMPLAIN ABOUT 320 00:09:05,133 --> 00:09:07,633 HOMEWORK. 321 00:09:07,733 --> 00:09:08,866 THAT'S EMBARRASSING FOR THAT 322 00:09:08,866 --> 00:09:10,533 MAN, WHO JUST GOT DESTROYED BY 323 00:09:10,533 --> 00:09:12,400 SOMEONE WHOSE MOM IS PICKING 324 00:09:12,400 --> 00:09:19,466 THEM UP AFTER THIS. 325 00:09:21,566 --> 00:09:21,766 INTERVIEW. 326 00:09:21,766 --> 00:09:22,733 AND THE AFD HAS BEEN ASSOCIATED 327 00:09:22,733 --> 00:09:23,300 WITH MUCH NASTIER STUFF THAN 328 00:09:23,300 --> 00:09:23,866 JUST "LEARN GERMAN POETRY." 329 00:09:23,866 --> 00:09:24,500 IT RECENTLY CAME OUT A NUMBER OF 330 00:09:24,500 --> 00:09:25,133 AFD OFFICIALS ATTENDED A SECRET 331 00:09:25,133 --> 00:09:25,666 MEETING WHERE PARTICIPANTS 332 00:09:25,666 --> 00:09:26,400 DISCUSSED PROPOSALS FOR 333 00:09:26,400 --> 00:09:28,233 "UNASSIMILATED CITIZENS" TO BE 334 00:09:28,233 --> 00:09:29,933 DEPORTED TO "A MODEL STATE IN 335 00:09:29,933 --> 00:09:31,333 NORTH AFRICA," INSTANTLY DRAWING 336 00:09:31,333 --> 00:09:32,433 COMPARISONS TO THE NAZI'S 337 00:09:32,433 --> 00:09:34,100 "INITIAL PLAN TO DEPORT EUROPEAN 338 00:09:34,100 --> 00:09:36,533 JEWS TO MADAGASCAR." 339 00:09:36,533 --> 00:09:37,700 IT'S ALL VERY BLEAK. 340 00:09:37,700 --> 00:09:39,666 BUT IF THERE'S ANY GOOD NEWS 341 00:09:39,666 --> 00:09:41,300 HERE, IT'S THE SEVERITY OF THE 342 00:09:41,400 --> 00:09:43,666 BACKLASH AGAINST THE AFD FROM 343 00:09:43,666 --> 00:09:44,533 MANY GERMANS. 344 00:09:44,533 --> 00:09:46,833 IN JANUARY, OVER 1 MILLION 345 00:09:46,833 --> 00:09:47,766 PEOPLE RALLIED IN CITIES ACROSS 346 00:09:47,766 --> 00:09:49,300 GERMANY, WITH BANNERS AND SIGNS 347 00:09:49,300 --> 00:09:50,600 THAT SAID THINGS LIKE "NO NAZIS" 348 00:09:50,600 --> 00:09:54,633 AND "VOTING FOR AFD IS SO 1933." 349 00:09:54,633 --> 00:09:56,833 AND THEY CLEARLY KNEW WHAT WAS 350 00:09:56,833 --> 00:09:57,766 AT STAKE. 351 00:09:57,766 --> 00:10:00,500 MORE THAN 150,000 HERE 352 00:10:00,500 --> 00:10:01,933 OUTSIDE THE REICHSTAG WITH ONE 353 00:10:01,933 --> 00:10:04,066 MESSAGE: GERMANY WILL NOT GO 354 00:10:04,066 --> 00:10:04,533 BACK TO THE DARK DAYS. 355 00:10:04,533 --> 00:10:05,700 WE'VE BEEN THERE ALREADY. 356 00:10:05,700 --> 00:10:06,800 YOU KNOW? 357 00:10:06,800 --> 00:10:07,600 AND YOU CAN STOP THEM THIS 358 00:10:07,600 --> 00:10:08,766 TIME? 359 00:10:08,766 --> 00:10:10,500 I HOPE SO, WE HAVE TO. 360 00:10:10,500 --> 00:10:11,966 IF YOU NOW HEAR PEOPLE 361 00:10:11,966 --> 00:10:14,366 FANTASIZING ABOUT DEPORTING 362 00:10:14,466 --> 00:10:16,400 MILLIONS OF GERMANS AND MIGRANTS 363 00:10:16,400 --> 00:10:20,000 IN GERMANY TO OTHER COUNTRIES 364 00:10:20,000 --> 00:10:20,833 WHEREVER IT IS THAT I MEAN IT 365 00:10:20,833 --> 00:10:22,600 RESONATES DIRECTLY TO HISTORY. 366 00:10:22,600 --> 00:10:23,133 John: YEAH, THAT MAN IS 367 00:10:23,133 --> 00:10:24,000 RIGHT! 368 00:10:24,000 --> 00:10:24,966 AND I CAN'T TELL YOU HOW MUCH I 369 00:10:24,966 --> 00:10:26,000 APPRECIATE THAT NOT ONLY DID HE 370 00:10:26,000 --> 00:10:28,566 BRING THAT DELIGHTFULLY COMPOSED 371 00:10:28,566 --> 00:10:29,833 WIENER DOG, IT ALSO HAD THE 372 00:10:29,833 --> 00:10:30,966 PRESENCE OF MIND TO LOOK 373 00:10:30,966 --> 00:10:33,000 STRAIGHT DOWN THE CAMERA, AS IF 374 00:10:33,000 --> 00:10:34,900 IT WAS WAITING FOR A RECORD 375 00:10:34,900 --> 00:10:35,500 SCRATCH SO IT COULD SAY, "YEP. 376 00:10:35,500 --> 00:10:37,500 THAT'S ME. 377 00:10:37,500 --> 00:10:38,133 YOU'RE PROBABLY WONDERING HOW I 378 00:10:38,133 --> 00:10:40,500 ENDED UP IN THIS SITUATION." 379 00:10:40,500 --> 00:10:42,266 AND A QUICK NOTE TO THAT CNN 380 00:10:42,266 --> 00:10:42,900 REPORTER: THAT'S HOW YOU REPORT. 381 00:10:42,900 --> 00:10:46,200 NOT BY WHISPERING OVER A SPEECH 382 00:10:46,200 --> 00:10:47,833 IN PROGRESS, BUT BY IDENTIFYING 383 00:10:47,933 --> 00:10:49,366 PEOPLE WITH PERFECT DOGS AND 384 00:10:49,466 --> 00:10:50,233 IMMEDIATELY GOING TO TALK TO 385 00:10:50,233 --> 00:10:51,966 THEM. 386 00:10:51,966 --> 00:10:53,833 AND WHILE THE PUSHBACK TO THE 387 00:10:53,833 --> 00:10:54,433 AFD IS INSPIRING, THE PARTY'S 388 00:10:54,433 --> 00:10:57,566 NOT GOING AWAY ANYTIME SOON. 389 00:10:57,566 --> 00:10:58,233 THEY'RE RUNNING FOR SEATS IN THE 390 00:10:58,233 --> 00:11:00,500 EUROPEAN PARLIAMENT NEXT MONTH, 391 00:11:00,500 --> 00:11:03,800 AND THERE ARE REGIONAL AND 392 00:11:03,800 --> 00:11:04,333 NATIONAL ELECTIONS ON THE 393 00:11:04,333 --> 00:11:04,566 HORIZON. 394 00:11:04,566 --> 00:11:05,333 ALL OF WHICH SHOULD BE VERY 395 00:11:05,333 --> 00:11:06,333 CONCERNING. 396 00:11:06,333 --> 00:11:07,933 BECAUSE BETWEEN THE ATTEMPTED 397 00:11:07,933 --> 00:11:08,766 ASSASSINATION OF A CENTRAL 398 00:11:08,766 --> 00:11:11,233 EUROPEAN LEADER, AND THE RISE OF 399 00:11:11,233 --> 00:11:12,400 A FAR-RIGHT PARTY IN GERMANY, 400 00:11:12,400 --> 00:11:14,133 EUROPE REALLY SEEMS TO BE 401 00:11:14,133 --> 00:11:16,600 PLAYING THE 20TH CENTURY HITS 402 00:11:16,600 --> 00:11:18,366 RIGHT NOW, EVEN IF SOME OF THEIR 403 00:11:18,366 --> 00:11:19,000 FORMER HISTORY TEACHERS REFUSE 404 00:11:19,000 --> 00:11:20,100 TO SEE THE SIMILARITY. 405 00:11:20,100 --> 00:11:24,300 AND NOW THIS. 406 00:11:24,300 --> 00:11:27,766 Announcer: AND NOW, 407 00:11:27,766 --> 00:11:28,966 PLEASE ENJOY SOME BETTER NEWS 408 00:11:28,966 --> 00:11:30,700 FOR THE DOGS FROM THIS YEAR'S 409 00:11:30,700 --> 00:11:33,300 WESTMINSTER DOG SHOW. 410 00:11:33,300 --> 00:11:40,366 CAN SENORA CHEF. 411 00:11:40,800 --> 00:11:43,333 RAVIOLI. 412 00:11:43,333 --> 00:11:46,266 SHOPPING. 413 00:11:46,266 --> 00:11:51,066 JASON STATHAM. 414 00:11:51,066 --> 00:11:53,433 FOOTBALL. 415 00:11:53,533 --> 00:11:54,400 BASEBALL. 416 00:11:54,500 --> 00:11:59,366 OPERATION CONDOR IS A POLITICAL 417 00:11:59,366 --> 00:12:03,433 OPERATION THAT TOOK PLACE FROM 418 00:12:03,433 --> 00:12:05,400 1975-1973. 419 00:12:05,400 --> 00:12:05,600 ERIC. 420 00:12:05,600 --> 00:12:10,300 LADY BUSINESS. 421 00:12:10,300 --> 00:12:10,833 WEASEL. 422 00:12:10,833 --> 00:12:12,966 THE REINCARNATION OF 423 00:12:12,966 --> 00:12:15,766 KING CHARLES III. 424 00:12:15,766 --> 00:12:18,933 AND CHER. 425 00:12:18,933 --> 00:12:19,833 [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] 426 00:12:19,833 --> 00:12:20,266 John: MOVING ON. 427 00:12:20,266 --> 00:12:20,900 OUR MAIN STORY TONIGHT CONCERNS 428 00:12:20,900 --> 00:12:22,366 CORN. 429 00:12:22,366 --> 00:12:22,933 WE LOVE IT IN ALL ITS FORMS, 430 00:12:22,933 --> 00:12:24,700 FROM CARAMEL CORN, TO THE CORN 431 00:12:24,700 --> 00:12:26,000 PALACE IN SOUTH DAKOTA, TO THE 432 00:12:26,000 --> 00:12:27,500 MASCOT OF THE NEBRASKA 433 00:12:27,600 --> 00:12:28,966 CORNHUSKERS-- EXCEPT, NOT THE 434 00:12:29,066 --> 00:12:30,033 MODERN TRAVESTY. 435 00:12:30,033 --> 00:12:30,633 I'M TALKING ABOUT THE EARLIER 436 00:12:30,633 --> 00:12:31,900 ONE-- NO, NOT THAT DEMON. 437 00:12:31,900 --> 00:12:32,866 THE "ORIGINAL." 438 00:12:32,866 --> 00:12:34,000 YEAH, THAT'S HIM. 439 00:12:34,000 --> 00:12:35,700 THE GUY IN REGULAR CLOTHES WITH 440 00:12:35,700 --> 00:12:42,566 AN ENORMOUS CORNCOB FOR A HEAD, 441 00:12:42,566 --> 00:12:44,233 ASKING THE QUESTION, "AM I MAN 442 00:12:44,233 --> 00:12:44,566 OR AM I CORN?" 443 00:12:44,566 --> 00:12:45,200 WE LOVE CORN SO MUCH, WE'VE EVEN 444 00:12:45,200 --> 00:12:45,866 FOUND A WAY TO MAKE IT A 445 00:12:45,866 --> 00:12:46,400 WHOLESOME FAMILY ACTIVITY. 446 00:12:46,400 --> 00:12:48,433 THIS ILLINOIS CORN MAZE IS 447 00:12:48,433 --> 00:12:51,100 RURAL SPRAWL: 28 ACRES IN ALL 448 00:12:51,100 --> 00:12:53,633 WITH ALMOST 10 MILES OF TRAILS. 449 00:12:53,633 --> 00:12:54,233 WE SAID, IF WE'RE GONNA DO 450 00:12:54,233 --> 00:12:56,966 IT, WHY NOT BE THE WORLD'S 451 00:12:56,966 --> 00:12:57,366 LARGEST? 452 00:12:57,366 --> 00:13:00,300 THE THEME CHANGES EVERY YEAR. 453 00:13:00,300 --> 00:13:02,533 THAT GREAT AERIAL PHOTOGRAPH, 454 00:13:02,633 --> 00:13:03,133 WE WANT PEOPLE TO GO, "WOW, 455 00:13:03,133 --> 00:13:04,766 THAT'S A MAGNIFICENT PICTURE." 456 00:13:04,766 --> 00:13:06,633 OUR BEATLES MAZE IN 2013, I 457 00:13:06,633 --> 00:13:08,633 MEAN, YOU COULD SEE THE FACES OF 458 00:13:08,633 --> 00:13:10,000 THE BEATLES. 459 00:13:10,000 --> 00:13:11,366 FIFTH-GRADERS ZIGZAGGING 460 00:13:11,366 --> 00:13:14,133 THROUGH A CORN MAZE THINKING, 461 00:13:14,133 --> 00:13:15,066 "WE GOTTA FIND A WAY OUT, OR 462 00:13:15,066 --> 00:13:16,533 THIS FIELD TRIP COULD BE OUR 463 00:13:16,533 --> 00:13:20,133 LAST." 464 00:13:20,133 --> 00:13:22,000 John: WOW, THAT GOT DARK, 465 00:13:22,000 --> 00:13:24,533 QUICK. 466 00:13:24,533 --> 00:13:25,900 ALTHOUGH I THINK EVEN THE 467 00:13:25,900 --> 00:13:26,500 BEATLES WOULD AGREE-- THERE'S 468 00:13:26,500 --> 00:13:28,566 NO BETTER TRIBUTE TO THEIR 469 00:13:28,566 --> 00:13:29,466 LEGACY THAN HAVING TERRIFIED 470 00:13:29,466 --> 00:13:30,833 CHILDREN WANDER AROUND RINGO'S 471 00:13:30,833 --> 00:13:32,066 NOSTRILS WONDERING IF THEY'LL 472 00:13:32,066 --> 00:13:34,233 EVER SEE THEIR FAMILIES AGAIN. 473 00:13:34,333 --> 00:13:36,600 AND BECAUSE OF HOW MUCH WE LOVE 474 00:13:36,600 --> 00:13:38,000 CORN, APPEALING TO THE CORN 475 00:13:38,000 --> 00:13:38,600 GROWERS OF AMERICA HAS ALWAYS 476 00:13:38,600 --> 00:13:40,233 BEEN GOOD POLITICS. 477 00:13:40,233 --> 00:13:41,933 PRESIDENTIAL CONTENDERS LOVE TO 478 00:13:41,933 --> 00:13:43,433 PANDER TO PEOPLE IN IOWA, FROM 479 00:13:43,433 --> 00:13:44,800 OBAMA STANDING IN FRONT OF A 480 00:13:44,800 --> 00:13:46,566 CORNFIELD, TO MITT ROMNEY 481 00:13:46,566 --> 00:13:48,133 PRETENDING TO BE INTENTLY 482 00:13:48,133 --> 00:13:49,200 INTERESTED IN AN EAR OF CORN, TO 483 00:13:49,200 --> 00:13:51,300 WHATEVER GEORGE BUSH THOUGHT HE 484 00:13:51,300 --> 00:13:52,633 WAS DOING HERE. 485 00:13:52,633 --> 00:13:54,366 THERE'S A LONG HISTORY OF 486 00:13:54,366 --> 00:13:55,000 AMERICAN POLITICIANS BEING WEIRD 487 00:13:55,000 --> 00:13:56,833 AROUND CORN, BUT PERHAPS NO 488 00:13:56,833 --> 00:13:59,933 ONE'S EVER BEEN WEIRDER WHILE 489 00:13:59,933 --> 00:14:02,000 DISCUSSING IT THAN THIS. 490 00:14:02,000 --> 00:14:03,833 I JUST MET NON-LIQUID GOLD. 491 00:14:03,833 --> 00:14:04,466 YOU KNOW WHERE IT WAS? 492 00:14:04,466 --> 00:14:05,000 IOWA. 493 00:14:05,000 --> 00:14:07,566 IT'S CALLED CORN. 494 00:14:07,666 --> 00:14:08,866 THEY HAVE-- IT'S NON-LIQUID. 495 00:14:08,966 --> 00:14:10,266 THAT'S WHAT THEY HAVE. 496 00:14:10,266 --> 00:14:12,533 YOU HAVE MORE NON-LIQUID GOLD. 497 00:14:12,533 --> 00:14:13,100 THEY SAID, "WHAT IS THAT?" 498 00:14:13,100 --> 00:14:14,533 I SAID, "CORN." 499 00:14:14,533 --> 00:14:15,566 THEY SAID, "WE LOVE THAT IDEA." 500 00:14:15,566 --> 00:14:16,933 YOU KNOW, THAT'S A PRETTY COOL 501 00:14:16,933 --> 00:14:17,833 THOUGHT, ISN'T IT? 502 00:14:17,833 --> 00:14:18,400 THAT'S A NICKNAME IN ITS OWN 503 00:14:18,400 --> 00:14:18,566 WAY. 504 00:14:18,566 --> 00:14:23,733 BUT WE CAME UP WITH A NEW WORD 505 00:14:23,733 --> 00:14:24,833 FOR-- A NEW COUPLE OF WORDS FOR 506 00:14:24,833 --> 00:14:25,033 CORN. 507 00:14:25,033 --> 00:14:30,866 John: DID YOU? 508 00:14:30,866 --> 00:14:31,966 DID YOU THOUGH? 509 00:14:31,966 --> 00:14:32,600 BECAUSE "NON-LIQUID GOLD" ISN'T 510 00:14:32,600 --> 00:14:33,233 SO MUCH A WAY OF DESCRIBING CORN 511 00:14:33,233 --> 00:14:34,100 AS IT IS A WAY OF DESCRIBING 512 00:14:34,100 --> 00:14:34,466 "REGULAR GOLD." 513 00:14:34,466 --> 00:14:35,100 THAT'S A LEVEL OF NON-INNOVATION 514 00:14:35,100 --> 00:14:36,400 INNOVATION WE HAVEN'T SEEN SINCE 515 00:14:36,400 --> 00:14:37,866 LYFT INVENTED SOMETHING CALLED 516 00:14:37,866 --> 00:14:39,666 LYFT SHUTTLE, WHICH WAS, AND 517 00:14:39,666 --> 00:14:43,033 THIS IS TRUE, THE BUS. 518 00:14:43,033 --> 00:14:44,433 BUT HE'S RIGHT: WE ARE THE 519 00:14:44,433 --> 00:14:45,266 WORLD'S LARGEST PRODUCER, 520 00:14:45,266 --> 00:14:47,000 CONSUMER, AND EXPORTER OF 521 00:14:47,000 --> 00:14:48,433 NON-LIQUID NOT-GOLD IN THE 522 00:14:48,433 --> 00:14:48,633 WORLD. 523 00:14:48,633 --> 00:14:49,700 WE ALSO PRODUCE MORE CORN THAN 524 00:14:49,700 --> 00:14:52,400 ANY OTHER CROP IN THE U.S. 525 00:14:52,400 --> 00:14:55,300 FARMING IT'S A NEARLY 526 00:14:55,300 --> 00:14:55,833 $90 BILLION INDUSTRY, WITH 527 00:14:55,833 --> 00:14:58,033 FARMERS PLANTING ROUGHLY 90 528 00:14:58,033 --> 00:14:58,666 MILLION ACRES A YEAR. 529 00:14:58,666 --> 00:14:59,533 AND IN CASE YOU'RE LIKE ME AND 530 00:14:59,533 --> 00:15:01,533 DON'T REALLY UNDERSTAND WHAT AN 531 00:15:01,533 --> 00:15:02,966 ACRE IS, IT MIGHT HELP TO KNOW 532 00:15:02,966 --> 00:15:04,700 THAT CORNFIELDS CURRENTLY OCCUPY 533 00:15:04,700 --> 00:15:07,233 NEARLY 5% OF THE LAND SURFACE OF 534 00:15:07,233 --> 00:15:08,800 THE CONTIGUOUS UNITED STATES. 535 00:15:08,800 --> 00:15:11,700 AND YOU MIGHT ALREADY BE 536 00:15:11,700 --> 00:15:12,233 THINKING, "WELL, SO WHAT? 537 00:15:12,233 --> 00:15:13,633 THAT MEANS AMERICA'S WELL 538 00:15:13,733 --> 00:15:15,133 STOCKED FOR THE MOVIES, 539 00:15:15,233 --> 00:15:16,833 BARBECUES, AND HOUSE PARTIES 540 00:15:16,833 --> 00:15:17,600 WHERE SOMEONE WANTS THAT BLACK 541 00:15:17,600 --> 00:15:18,433 BEAN SALSA THING. 542 00:15:18,433 --> 00:15:19,333 WHY DO YOU HAVE TO RUIN A GOOD 543 00:15:19,333 --> 00:15:20,633 THING?" 544 00:15:20,633 --> 00:15:22,366 AND TO THAT I SAY, ONE: IT'S A 545 00:15:22,366 --> 00:15:23,533 CALLING AND A CLARITY OF PURPOSE 546 00:15:23,533 --> 00:15:25,466 AND TWO: OF THOSE MILLIONS OF 547 00:15:25,466 --> 00:15:27,300 ACRES OF CORN, ONLY 1% IS MADE 548 00:15:27,300 --> 00:15:28,866 FOR DIRECT HUMAN CONSUMPTION. 549 00:15:28,866 --> 00:15:31,533 THE REST IS CALLED FIELD OR 550 00:15:31,533 --> 00:15:32,700 "DENT" CORN-- WHICH, AS THESE 551 00:15:32,700 --> 00:15:34,566 DOCUMENTARIANS DISCOVERED, MIGHT 552 00:15:34,566 --> 00:15:35,733 LOOK DELICIOUS, BUT VERY MUCH 553 00:15:35,733 --> 00:15:39,266 ISN'T. 554 00:15:39,266 --> 00:15:41,866 UGH. 555 00:15:41,866 --> 00:15:46,433 IT'S NOT VERY GOOD, IAN. 556 00:15:46,433 --> 00:15:47,433 TASTES LIKE SAWDUST. 557 00:15:47,533 --> 00:15:47,966 YEAH. 558 00:15:47,966 --> 00:15:49,366 IT'S DISGUSTING. 559 00:15:49,466 --> 00:15:51,666 IT TASTES LIKE CHALK. 560 00:15:51,666 --> 00:15:52,366 I REALLY THOUGHT IT WOULD 561 00:15:52,366 --> 00:15:55,333 TASTE BETTER. 562 00:15:55,333 --> 00:15:57,233 John: YEAH, TURNS OUT, SWEET 563 00:15:57,233 --> 00:15:58,533 CORN IS AS SIMILAR TO DENT CORN 564 00:15:58,533 --> 00:15:59,266 AS A CHOCOLATE BUNNY IS TO A 565 00:15:59,266 --> 00:16:00,466 REAL BUNNY. 566 00:16:00,466 --> 00:16:02,600 ONLY ONE OF THEM ACTUALLY TASTES 567 00:16:02,600 --> 00:16:04,933 GOOD RAW. 568 00:16:04,933 --> 00:16:06,200 NOW, I SHOULD POINT OUT-- DENT 569 00:16:06,200 --> 00:16:07,366 CORN IS USED IN A LOT OF THINGS 570 00:16:07,366 --> 00:16:08,400 THAT WE DO CONSUME, LIKE 571 00:16:08,400 --> 00:16:11,433 CORNMEAL AND HIGH-FRUCTOSE CORN 572 00:16:11,433 --> 00:16:11,933 SYRUP. 573 00:16:11,933 --> 00:16:12,733 IT'S ALSO USED IN INDUSTRIAL 574 00:16:12,733 --> 00:16:13,666 PRODUCTS, LIKE PAINTS AND 575 00:16:13,666 --> 00:16:14,233 PLASTICS. 576 00:16:14,233 --> 00:16:16,000 BUT IN RECENT YEARS, SUCH USES 577 00:16:16,000 --> 00:16:17,433 HAVE ONLY ACCOUNTED FOR AROUND 578 00:16:17,433 --> 00:16:19,133 15% OF WHAT WE DO WITH DENT 579 00:16:19,133 --> 00:16:21,033 CORN, WITH AROUND 40% BEING USED 580 00:16:21,133 --> 00:16:21,866 FOR LIVESTOCK FEED, AND THE 581 00:16:21,966 --> 00:16:24,466 FINAL 45% BECOMING THE GASOLINE 582 00:16:24,466 --> 00:16:26,400 ALTERNATIVE ETHANOL. 583 00:16:26,400 --> 00:16:28,100 BUT AS YOU'LL SEE, WHILE CORN IS 584 00:16:28,100 --> 00:16:29,133 INCREDIBLY VERSATILE, THE WAY 585 00:16:29,133 --> 00:16:30,800 WE'VE INCENTIVIZED FARMING IT 586 00:16:30,800 --> 00:16:32,100 HAS CAUSED CONSIDERABLE 587 00:16:32,100 --> 00:16:33,433 DOWNSTREAM HARM. 588 00:16:33,433 --> 00:16:35,166 BECAUSE IT TURNS OUT, CORN'S 589 00:16:35,166 --> 00:16:36,700 UTTER DOMINANCE OF AMERICAN 590 00:16:36,700 --> 00:16:37,633 AGRICULTURE COMES AT THE EXPENSE 591 00:16:37,633 --> 00:16:39,366 OF OUR ENVIRONMENT, OUR HEALTH, 592 00:16:39,366 --> 00:16:40,700 AND SOME OF OUR FARMING 593 00:16:40,700 --> 00:16:42,466 COMMUNITIES. 594 00:16:42,466 --> 00:16:43,400 JUST LISTEN TO ONE SCIENTIST WHO 595 00:16:43,400 --> 00:16:44,800 GREW UP FARMING SUM UP HOW HE 596 00:16:44,800 --> 00:16:46,466 FEELS ABOUT IT. 597 00:16:46,466 --> 00:16:48,400 I GO BY A FIELD OF CORN. 598 00:16:48,400 --> 00:16:50,266 LOOKS BEAUTIFUL TO ME. 599 00:16:50,266 --> 00:16:52,166 YOU KNOW, THAT-- THAT COMES 600 00:16:52,166 --> 00:16:53,466 FROM HAVING GROWN UP ON THE 601 00:16:53,466 --> 00:16:54,533 KANSAS FARM. 602 00:16:54,633 --> 00:16:56,733 IF YOU'RE NOT AWARE AS TO WHAT 603 00:16:56,733 --> 00:16:59,166 IT IS THAT STANDS BEHIND ALL OF 604 00:16:59,166 --> 00:17:01,600 THAT AGRICULTURE, YOU CAN LIVE 605 00:17:01,600 --> 00:17:04,033 WITH THE ILLUSION THAT THERE'S 606 00:17:04,033 --> 00:17:04,366 NOTHING WRONG. 607 00:17:04,366 --> 00:17:05,133 John: RIGHT. 608 00:17:05,133 --> 00:17:06,733 IF YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT'S BEHIND 609 00:17:06,733 --> 00:17:07,533 THOSE STALKS OF CORN, YOU CAN 610 00:17:07,533 --> 00:17:08,466 EASILY BELIEVE THERE'S NOTHING 611 00:17:08,466 --> 00:17:10,700 WRONG. 612 00:17:10,700 --> 00:17:11,333 BUT I'VE ALREADY SHOWN YOU THERE 613 00:17:11,333 --> 00:17:12,266 COULD WELL BE A BUNCH OF FIFTH 614 00:17:12,266 --> 00:17:14,000 GRADERS WANDERING AROUND BACK 615 00:17:14,000 --> 00:17:15,633 THERE, RUNNING LOW ON SUPPLIES. 616 00:17:15,633 --> 00:17:16,733 SO WE'RE PAST THE POINT OF THE 617 00:17:16,733 --> 00:17:18,566 ILLUSION. 618 00:17:18,566 --> 00:17:19,966 AND GIVEN THAT, TONIGHT, LET'S 619 00:17:19,966 --> 00:17:20,800 TALK ABOUT A FEW OF THE KEY 620 00:17:20,800 --> 00:17:21,900 PROBLEMS WITH CORN. 621 00:17:21,900 --> 00:17:23,533 SPECIFICALLY, HOW WE SUBSIDIZE 622 00:17:23,533 --> 00:17:24,833 IT, HOW WE GROW IT, AND WHAT WE 623 00:17:24,833 --> 00:17:26,566 SHOVE IT INTO. 624 00:17:26,666 --> 00:17:28,100 AND LET'S START WITH THE FACT 625 00:17:28,200 --> 00:17:28,700 THAT THE U.S. IS INCREDIBLY 626 00:17:28,700 --> 00:17:30,800 WELL-SUITED TO GROWING CORN, AS 627 00:17:30,800 --> 00:17:32,900 THIS PROFESSOR EXPLAINS IN A 628 00:17:32,900 --> 00:17:34,633 BIZARRE WALK-AND-TALK. 629 00:17:34,633 --> 00:17:35,566 IT'S REALLY A TROPICAL CROP, 630 00:17:35,566 --> 00:17:38,466 WARM SEASON CROP. 631 00:17:38,466 --> 00:17:40,500 BUT THE GROWING SEASON HERE, THE 632 00:17:40,500 --> 00:17:41,233 PRECIPITATION, THE RAINFALL THAT 633 00:17:41,233 --> 00:17:43,500 WE GET, THE AMOUNT OF LIGHT THAT 634 00:17:43,500 --> 00:17:46,466 WE GET, ALL THOSE THINGS COMBINE 635 00:17:46,466 --> 00:17:47,800 TO JUST BE A WONDERFUL, PERFECT 636 00:17:47,800 --> 00:17:49,900 ENVIRONMENT FOR IT TO GROW IN. 637 00:17:49,900 --> 00:17:50,433 John: WHAT IS HAPPENING 638 00:17:50,433 --> 00:17:52,233 THERE? 639 00:17:52,233 --> 00:17:53,233 WHOSE IDEA WAS IT TO MAKE HIM DO 640 00:17:53,233 --> 00:17:54,000 THAT? 641 00:17:54,000 --> 00:17:55,333 "YOU KNOW WHAT WOULD MAKE THIS 642 00:17:55,333 --> 00:17:56,733 POINT ABOUT THE PERFECT CLIMATE 643 00:17:56,733 --> 00:17:58,200 OF THE CORN BELT REALLY LAND FOR 644 00:17:58,200 --> 00:17:58,766 PEOPLE? 645 00:17:58,766 --> 00:18:00,800 PROFESSOR ROGER ELMORE BEING 646 00:18:00,900 --> 00:18:02,100 AGGRESSIVELY GROPED BY HORNY 647 00:18:02,200 --> 00:18:04,133 STALKS OF IT." 648 00:18:04,133 --> 00:18:07,333 BUT WHILE CHEMICAL FERTILIZERS, 649 00:18:07,333 --> 00:18:08,333 CAREFUL BREEDING, AND NEW 650 00:18:08,333 --> 00:18:08,900 TECHNOLOGY HAVE MADE FARMERS 651 00:18:08,900 --> 00:18:10,733 ABLE TO GROW MASSIVE AMOUNTS OF 652 00:18:10,733 --> 00:18:12,533 CORN, GOVERNMENT POLICY HAS ALSO 653 00:18:12,533 --> 00:18:13,133 PLAYED A SIGNIFICANT ROLE, BY 654 00:18:13,133 --> 00:18:15,000 HEAVILY THUMBING THE SCALE IN 655 00:18:15,000 --> 00:18:16,900 INCENTIVIZING WHAT CROPS FARMERS 656 00:18:16,900 --> 00:18:18,633 CHOOSE TO GROW. 657 00:18:18,633 --> 00:18:20,066 MODERN FARM POLICY WAS BORN 658 00:18:20,066 --> 00:18:20,766 DURING THE GREAT DEPRESSION, 659 00:18:20,766 --> 00:18:23,700 WHEN FARMERS FACED A CRISIS. 660 00:18:23,700 --> 00:18:24,800 NEARLY A MILLION LOST THEIR 661 00:18:24,800 --> 00:18:26,200 FARMS IN THE FIRST FOUR YEARS 662 00:18:26,200 --> 00:18:26,800 ALONE. 663 00:18:26,800 --> 00:18:28,733 AND THAT'S WHEN FDR'S 664 00:18:28,733 --> 00:18:30,833 ADMINISTRATION PASSED 665 00:18:30,833 --> 00:18:31,866 LEGISLATION TO DRIVE THE PRICE 666 00:18:31,866 --> 00:18:33,200 OF FARMED GOODS UP DURING TIMES 667 00:18:33,200 --> 00:18:34,966 OF OVERSUPPLY, BY DOING THINGS 668 00:18:35,066 --> 00:18:35,566 LIKE PAYING FARMERS TO PLANT 669 00:18:35,566 --> 00:18:38,100 LESS. 670 00:18:38,100 --> 00:18:44,666 BUT A KEY TURNING POINT CAME IN 671 00:18:44,666 --> 00:18:45,566 THE 1970s, THANKS IN LARGE 672 00:18:45,566 --> 00:18:46,533 PART TO A MAN NAMED-- AND THIS 673 00:18:46,533 --> 00:18:47,166 IS TRUE-- EARL BUTZ. 674 00:18:47,166 --> 00:18:47,700 HIS NICKNAME WAS ACTUALLY 675 00:18:47,700 --> 00:18:50,800 "RUSTY," MEANING HE WAS KNOWN AS 676 00:18:50,800 --> 00:18:52,033 TRUE AGAIN-- EARL "RUSTY" 677 00:18:52,033 --> 00:18:52,566 BUTZ. 678 00:18:52,566 --> 00:18:53,200 ANYWAY-- BUTZ, WHO WAS NIXON'S 679 00:18:53,200 --> 00:18:53,833 AGRICULTURE SECRETARY, DISAGREED 680 00:18:53,833 --> 00:18:54,833 WITH THE POLICY OF PAYING 681 00:18:54,833 --> 00:18:56,433 FARMERS TO REDUCE SUPPLY, AND 682 00:18:56,433 --> 00:18:58,566 SOUGHT TO SWING THE PENDULUM ALL 683 00:18:58,566 --> 00:18:59,066 THE WAY IN THE OPPOSITE 684 00:18:59,066 --> 00:19:02,266 DIRECTION. 685 00:19:02,266 --> 00:19:03,066 WITH THE NEW FARM ACT, WE 686 00:19:03,066 --> 00:19:04,166 HAVE EXPERIENCED A 180-DEGREE 687 00:19:04,166 --> 00:19:05,633 TURN IN THE PHILOSOPHY OF OUR 688 00:19:05,633 --> 00:19:08,700 FARM PROGRAMS. 689 00:19:08,800 --> 00:19:11,066 WE'VE ABANDONED THE LONGTIME 690 00:19:11,066 --> 00:19:12,400 PHILOSOPHY OF CURTAILMENT AND 691 00:19:12,400 --> 00:19:13,300 CUTBACK TO THE NEW PHILOSOPHY OF 692 00:19:13,300 --> 00:19:14,633 EXPANSION. 693 00:19:14,633 --> 00:19:15,866 WE'RE GOING TO SEE THE MOST 694 00:19:15,866 --> 00:19:18,233 MASSIVE INCREASE IN PRODUCTION 695 00:19:18,233 --> 00:19:19,533 OF FARM PRODUCTS EVER IN THIS 696 00:19:19,533 --> 00:19:21,966 HISTORY OF THIS COUNTRY. 697 00:19:21,966 --> 00:19:23,700 John: YEAH, RUSTY BUTZ, A MAN 698 00:19:23,700 --> 00:19:24,800 WHO LOOKS LIKE HE'D PROBABLY ONE 699 00:19:24,800 --> 00:19:26,566 DAY HAVE TO RESIGN AFTER SAYING 700 00:19:26,566 --> 00:19:29,500 A RACIAL SLUR-- INSISTED 701 00:19:29,500 --> 00:19:30,066 EVERYONE SHOULD "GROW MORE." 702 00:19:30,066 --> 00:19:30,700 AND HE DID THAT ONLY A FEW YEARS 703 00:19:30,700 --> 00:19:31,833 BEFORE, UNSURPRISINGLY, 704 00:19:31,833 --> 00:19:32,800 RESIGNING AFTER SAYING A RACIAL 705 00:19:32,800 --> 00:19:36,166 SLUR. 706 00:19:36,166 --> 00:19:37,533 BUT WHILE HE WAS STILL IN THE 707 00:19:37,533 --> 00:19:39,166 JOB, BUTZ PUSHED HARD FOR 708 00:19:39,166 --> 00:19:39,666 FARMERS TO EXPAND THEIR 709 00:19:39,666 --> 00:19:41,033 OPERATIONS. 710 00:19:41,133 --> 00:19:44,233 AND NIXON'S 1973 FARM BILL 711 00:19:44,233 --> 00:19:44,766 REFLECTED HIS PHILOSOPHY. 712 00:19:44,766 --> 00:19:46,266 FARMERS WOULD NO LONGER BE PAID 713 00:19:46,266 --> 00:19:48,300 FOR NOT PLANTING CROPS. 714 00:19:48,300 --> 00:19:49,966 INSTEAD, IF PRICES FELL BELOW A 715 00:19:49,966 --> 00:19:52,466 CERTAIN TARGET, THE FEDERAL 716 00:19:52,466 --> 00:19:53,033 GOVERNMENT WOULD SIMPLY PAY 717 00:19:53,033 --> 00:19:54,666 FARMERS TO MAKE UP THE 718 00:19:54,666 --> 00:19:55,400 DIFFERENCE, SIGNIFICANTLY 719 00:19:55,400 --> 00:19:57,333 REDUCING THE RISK OF EXPANDING 720 00:19:57,333 --> 00:20:00,966 YOUR OPERATION, AND 721 00:20:00,966 --> 00:20:01,566 INCENTIVIZING FARMERS TO GO AS 722 00:20:01,566 --> 00:20:02,833 BIG AS THEY COULD. 723 00:20:02,833 --> 00:20:03,700 THESE POLICIES HELPED CREATE 724 00:20:03,700 --> 00:20:05,566 ALMOST IMMEDIATE SURPLUSES IN 725 00:20:05,566 --> 00:20:06,533 COMMODITY CROPS, ESPECIALLY 726 00:20:06,533 --> 00:20:08,466 CORN. 727 00:20:08,466 --> 00:20:10,266 AND SIMILAR POLICIES STILL EXIST 728 00:20:10,266 --> 00:20:11,400 TODAY-- AND ON TOP OF THEM, THE 729 00:20:11,400 --> 00:20:12,600 GOVERNMENT NOW ISSUES SUBSIDIES 730 00:20:12,600 --> 00:20:14,366 TO PAY FOR PART OF A FARMER'S 731 00:20:14,466 --> 00:20:15,000 CROP INSURANCE-- WHICH PROVIDES 732 00:20:15,100 --> 00:20:16,866 COVERAGE TO FARMERS IF THEIR 733 00:20:16,866 --> 00:20:18,533 CROPS FAIL. 734 00:20:18,533 --> 00:20:19,166 THOSE SUBSIDIES HAVE AMOUNTED TO 735 00:20:19,166 --> 00:20:20,433 OVER 60% OF THE INSURANCE 736 00:20:20,433 --> 00:20:23,266 PREMIUMS IN RECENT YEARS. 737 00:20:23,266 --> 00:20:24,733 AND WHILE THESE POLICIES 738 00:20:24,733 --> 00:20:25,466 SOMETIMES GET POSITIONED AS 739 00:20:25,466 --> 00:20:28,633 PROTECTIONS FOR SMALL FAMILY 740 00:20:28,633 --> 00:20:30,000 FARMERS, THE TRUTH IS, THAT'S 741 00:20:30,000 --> 00:20:32,000 NOT WHO REAPS THE VAST MAJORITY 742 00:20:32,000 --> 00:20:33,566 OF THE BENEFITS, WHICH TEND TO 743 00:20:33,566 --> 00:20:36,766 FLOW TO THE BIGGEST PRODUCERS. 744 00:20:36,766 --> 00:20:37,433 IN FACT, OVER THE LAST 28 YEARS, 745 00:20:37,433 --> 00:20:39,366 THE TOP 10% OF FARM SUBSIDY 746 00:20:39,366 --> 00:20:42,466 RECIPIENTS RECEIVED 79% OF THE 747 00:20:42,466 --> 00:20:44,300 SUBSIDIES, WITH OVER A QUARTER 748 00:20:44,300 --> 00:20:46,066 OF THEM GOING TO THE TOP 1%. 749 00:20:46,066 --> 00:20:48,600 MEANWHILE, THE VAST MAJORITY OF 750 00:20:48,700 --> 00:20:51,433 FARMERS DO NOT BENEFIT FROM FARM 751 00:20:51,433 --> 00:20:53,700 SUBSIDY PROGRAMS AT ALL. 752 00:20:53,700 --> 00:20:54,733 AND THAT'S FOR MANY REASONS, NOT 753 00:20:54,733 --> 00:20:56,266 LEAST OF WHICH IS THAT IT'S MUCH 754 00:20:56,266 --> 00:20:58,466 HARDER FOR SMALL FARMS, WHICH 755 00:20:58,466 --> 00:20:59,433 MIGHT GROW A WIDER VARIETY OF 756 00:20:59,433 --> 00:21:01,666 CROPS, TO QUALIFY FOR THEM. 757 00:21:01,666 --> 00:21:03,233 JUST LISTEN TO THIS FAMILY 758 00:21:03,233 --> 00:21:04,833 EXPLAIN THEIR SMALL FARM'S 759 00:21:04,833 --> 00:21:05,100 SITUATION. 760 00:21:05,100 --> 00:21:06,066 WE GROW TOMATOES, WE GROW 761 00:21:06,066 --> 00:21:07,266 BASIL, WE GROW CAULIFLOWER, WE 762 00:21:07,266 --> 00:21:09,500 GROW BROCCOLI, WE GROW CHARD AND 763 00:21:09,500 --> 00:21:12,366 CARROTS. 764 00:21:12,366 --> 00:21:14,500 WE GROW THE HEALTHIEST CROPS 765 00:21:14,500 --> 00:21:16,033 WE-- WE POSSIBLY CAN. 766 00:21:16,033 --> 00:21:16,833 I DON'T THINK THERE IS A 767 00:21:16,833 --> 00:21:18,200 SUBSIDY FOR ANY OF THE CROPS WE 768 00:21:18,200 --> 00:21:18,400 GROW. 769 00:21:18,400 --> 00:21:20,566 AS FAR AS I'M CONCERNED, THE 770 00:21:20,666 --> 00:21:22,200 ONLY SUBSIDIES OUT THERE ARE FOR 771 00:21:22,300 --> 00:21:23,833 THE BIG GRAIN PRODUCERS. 772 00:21:23,833 --> 00:21:24,833 John: OKAY, FIRST, LET ME 773 00:21:24,833 --> 00:21:26,600 JUST ADDRESS SOMETHING: THAT'S A 774 00:21:26,600 --> 00:21:31,400 FUCKED-UP LOOKING CARROT THAT 775 00:21:31,400 --> 00:21:32,300 KID'S HOLDING THERE. 776 00:21:32,300 --> 00:21:32,900 BUT SECOND, IT DOES FEEL WRONG 777 00:21:32,900 --> 00:21:33,433 THAT AN OPERATION GROWING 778 00:21:33,433 --> 00:21:34,566 HEALTHY PRODUCE WOULDN'T RECEIVE 779 00:21:34,566 --> 00:21:36,266 ANY SUBSIDIES, EVEN IF IT IS 780 00:21:36,266 --> 00:21:37,266 CALLED "C'EST NATURELLE," WHICH 781 00:21:37,266 --> 00:21:39,633 SOUNDS LESS LIKE A SMALL FAMILY 782 00:21:39,633 --> 00:21:40,666 FARM AND MORE LIKE A 783 00:21:40,666 --> 00:21:43,900 PH-BALANCING DOUCHE. 784 00:21:43,900 --> 00:21:44,966 AND SOME BIG LANDOWNERS HAVE, 785 00:21:44,966 --> 00:21:47,266 OVER THE YEARS, DEVELOPED ALL 786 00:21:47,266 --> 00:21:48,100 SORTS OF WAYS TO GAME THE 787 00:21:48,100 --> 00:21:50,000 FARM-SUBSIDY SYSTEM. 788 00:21:50,000 --> 00:21:51,566 FOR INSTANCE, PAYMENTS USED TO 789 00:21:51,566 --> 00:21:52,866 BE CAPPED ON A PER-FARM BASIS, 790 00:21:52,866 --> 00:21:55,233 SO THEY SIMPLY STARTED 791 00:21:55,333 --> 00:21:57,100 SUBDIVIDING THEMSELVES INTO 792 00:21:57,100 --> 00:21:58,500 MULTIPLE ENTITIES, EACH OF WHICH 793 00:21:58,500 --> 00:21:59,100 COULD THEN COLLECT THE MAXIMUM 794 00:21:59,100 --> 00:22:00,866 PAYOUT. 795 00:22:00,866 --> 00:22:02,800 BACK IN THE 2000S, THE GAO 796 00:22:02,800 --> 00:22:03,366 POINTED OUT THIS PROBLEM-- 797 00:22:03,366 --> 00:22:04,800 NOTING THAT ONE LANDOWNER IN 798 00:22:04,800 --> 00:22:06,933 ARKANSAS, DAVID BROOKS GRIFFIN, 799 00:22:06,933 --> 00:22:07,500 HAD SPLIT HIS FARM INTO 66 800 00:22:07,500 --> 00:22:10,400 SMALLER ONES AND SEEMED TO BE 801 00:22:10,400 --> 00:22:12,133 LISTING HIS EMPLOYEES AS THEIR 802 00:22:12,133 --> 00:22:12,366 OWNERS. 803 00:22:12,366 --> 00:22:14,033 JUST WATCH WHAT HAPPENED WHEN 804 00:22:14,033 --> 00:22:16,300 ONE REPORTER TRIED TO PAY 805 00:22:16,300 --> 00:22:16,700 GRIFFIN A VISIT. 806 00:22:16,700 --> 00:22:17,566 WE WANTED TO SPEAK WITH MR. 807 00:22:17,566 --> 00:22:18,600 GRIFFIN, SHOWN HERE LEAVING ON 808 00:22:18,600 --> 00:22:20,100 HIS HELICOPTER, BUT HE REFUSED. 809 00:22:20,100 --> 00:22:27,166 SO, INSTEAD, WE SET OUT TO FIND 810 00:22:28,033 --> 00:22:28,700 SOME OF THE PEOPLE GRIFFIN 811 00:22:28,800 --> 00:22:29,300 ENLISTED AS OWNERS OF THOSE 812 00:22:29,300 --> 00:22:29,866 SMALLER FARMS. 813 00:22:29,866 --> 00:22:31,066 IT TOOK SOME HUNTING FOR US TO 814 00:22:31,066 --> 00:22:31,866 FIND QUIMBY POTTS. 815 00:22:31,866 --> 00:22:32,800 I'M A PARTNER IN THREE 816 00:22:32,800 --> 00:22:33,666 DIFFERENT FARMS. 817 00:22:33,666 --> 00:22:36,100 THE GOVERNMENT LISTS HIM AS A 818 00:22:36,100 --> 00:22:36,766 PART OWNER OF SEVERAL OF THE 819 00:22:36,766 --> 00:22:38,333 SMALLER FARMS. 820 00:22:38,333 --> 00:22:40,033 BUT LIKE MANY LISTED AS OWNERS 821 00:22:40,033 --> 00:22:41,833 OF PAPER FARMS, POTTS APPEARED 822 00:22:41,833 --> 00:22:43,766 TO BE AN OWNER IN NAME ONLY. 823 00:22:43,766 --> 00:22:45,133 THE RECORDS INDICATE, OVER 824 00:22:45,133 --> 00:22:45,900 THREE YEARS, YOU RECEIVED 825 00:22:45,900 --> 00:22:48,433 $340,000. 826 00:22:48,433 --> 00:22:49,900 THROUGH THE FARMS. 827 00:22:49,900 --> 00:22:50,500 THROUGH THE FARM PAYMENTS, 828 00:22:50,500 --> 00:22:51,833 THAT'S RIGHT. 829 00:22:51,833 --> 00:22:52,666 BUT DID YOU PUT THAT MONEY IN 830 00:22:52,666 --> 00:22:54,066 YOUR BANK ACCOUNT? 831 00:22:54,066 --> 00:22:56,266 YEAH, NO! 832 00:22:56,266 --> 00:23:02,666 John: YEAH, OF COURSE "NO." 833 00:23:02,766 --> 00:23:03,833 THAT IS VERY WELL SAID! 834 00:23:03,833 --> 00:23:04,433 AND IF YOU'RE WONDERING HOW TO 835 00:23:04,433 --> 00:23:05,033 TELL WHO THE REAL OWNER OF THE 836 00:23:05,033 --> 00:23:05,633 FARM IS, IT'S NOT THE GUY WHO 837 00:23:05,633 --> 00:23:06,600 AGREED TO THE INTERVIEW, AND IT 838 00:23:06,600 --> 00:23:07,900 IS THE GUY "SHOWN LEAVING ON HIS 839 00:23:07,900 --> 00:23:08,833 HELICOPTER." 840 00:23:08,833 --> 00:23:12,100 BUT USDA INVESTIGATORS SAID THAT 841 00:23:12,100 --> 00:23:12,533 WAS PERFECTLY LEGAL. 842 00:23:12,533 --> 00:23:13,333 AND INCREDIBLY, SOME OF THE 843 00:23:13,333 --> 00:23:15,233 RULES HAVE ONLY GOTTEN LOOSER 844 00:23:15,233 --> 00:23:15,700 SINCE THEN. 845 00:23:15,700 --> 00:23:16,766 UNDER THE CURRENT FARM BILL, 846 00:23:16,766 --> 00:23:18,000 THAT PER-FARM PAYMENT LIMIT HAS 847 00:23:18,000 --> 00:23:19,233 BEEN SCRAPPED. 848 00:23:19,233 --> 00:23:20,366 AND WHILE THERE'S TECHNICALLY A 849 00:23:20,366 --> 00:23:23,433 LIMIT OF $125,000 PER YEAR, PER 850 00:23:23,433 --> 00:23:26,400 PERSON, CRUCIALLY, THERE IS NO 851 00:23:26,400 --> 00:23:27,366 CAP ON HOW MANY PEOPLE CAN REACH 852 00:23:27,366 --> 00:23:28,933 THE PAYMENT LIMIT. 853 00:23:28,933 --> 00:23:30,633 SO IN ADDITION TO MORE IMMEDIATE 854 00:23:30,633 --> 00:23:33,766 FAMILY MEMBERS LIKE PARENTS, 855 00:23:33,866 --> 00:23:34,933 SIBLINGS, AND ADULT CHILDREN, 856 00:23:35,033 --> 00:23:35,566 COUSINS, NIECES OR NEPHEWS ALSO 857 00:23:35,666 --> 00:23:36,200 QUALIFY FOR PAYMENTS. 858 00:23:36,200 --> 00:23:37,600 THE ONLY REAL REQUIREMENT IS 859 00:23:37,600 --> 00:23:39,300 THAT YOU MUST BE "ACTIVELY 860 00:23:39,300 --> 00:23:40,266 ENGAGED" IN FARMING. 861 00:23:40,266 --> 00:23:41,400 BUT IT TURNS OUT, EVEN THAT 862 00:23:41,400 --> 00:23:42,966 DOESN'T REALLY MEAN MUCH. 863 00:23:42,966 --> 00:23:45,133 THE DEFINITION OF ACTIVELY 864 00:23:45,133 --> 00:23:47,266 ENGAGED IN FARMING IS VERY 865 00:23:47,266 --> 00:23:48,933 VAGUE, SO YOU CAN CALL INTO A 866 00:23:48,933 --> 00:23:51,166 SHAREHOLDER MEETING EVERY NOW 867 00:23:51,166 --> 00:23:53,900 AND THEN A FEW TIMES A YEAR OR 868 00:23:53,900 --> 00:23:57,366 DO THINGS LIKE HAVE SOME SMALL 869 00:23:57,366 --> 00:23:58,266 FINANCIAL RISK IN THE FARM IN 870 00:23:58,266 --> 00:24:00,366 ORDER TO RECEIVE PAYMENTS. 871 00:24:00,366 --> 00:24:02,100 SO, YOU DON'T HAVE TO EVER SET 872 00:24:02,100 --> 00:24:04,133 FOOT ON A FARM TO RECEIVE THESE 873 00:24:04,133 --> 00:24:07,366 PAYMENTS. 874 00:24:07,466 --> 00:24:08,200 John: THAT'S TRUE. 875 00:24:08,300 --> 00:24:08,866 YOU DON'T HAVE TO EVEN SET FOOT 876 00:24:08,866 --> 00:24:09,466 ON A FARM, YOU CAN JUST BE THE 877 00:24:09,466 --> 00:24:10,800 FARM OWNER'S COUSIN. 878 00:24:10,800 --> 00:24:12,333 WHICH AS WE'RE ALL AWARE, CAN BE 879 00:24:12,333 --> 00:24:14,166 SOMEONE YOU BARELY KNOW. 880 00:24:14,166 --> 00:24:15,066 A NORMAL RELATIONSHIP WITH YOUR 881 00:24:15,066 --> 00:24:16,433 COUSIN IS: GET THEIR HOLIDAY 882 00:24:16,433 --> 00:24:17,933 CARD ANNOUNCING THEIR THIRD 883 00:24:17,933 --> 00:24:19,500 PREGNANCY, THINK "DIDN'T THEY 884 00:24:19,500 --> 00:24:21,366 SAY THEY HATED KIDS?" 885 00:24:21,366 --> 00:24:23,200 HANG THE CARD ON YOUR FRIDGE, 886 00:24:23,200 --> 00:24:23,833 AND THEN THROW IT AWAY ONCE YOU 887 00:24:23,833 --> 00:24:25,300 STOP FEELING GUILTY. 888 00:24:25,300 --> 00:24:25,866 ALL OF WHICH, IN MY OPINION, 889 00:24:25,866 --> 00:24:28,833 DOESN'T ENTITLE YOU TO $125,000 890 00:24:28,833 --> 00:24:30,633 A YEAR. 891 00:24:30,633 --> 00:24:31,200 AND LOOK, IT'S NOT LIKE CORN 892 00:24:31,200 --> 00:24:32,033 IS THE ONLY CROP WE SUBSIDIZE IN 893 00:24:32,033 --> 00:24:32,733 THIS WAY. 894 00:24:32,733 --> 00:24:34,566 YOU COULD MAKE SIMILAR 895 00:24:34,566 --> 00:24:36,233 CRITICISMS OF WHEAT OR SOYBEANS. 896 00:24:36,233 --> 00:24:37,266 BUT THE BIGGEST SHARE OF THESE 897 00:24:37,266 --> 00:24:38,333 SUBSIDIES IN RECENT DECADES HAVE 898 00:24:38,333 --> 00:24:40,233 GONE TO CORN, FAR SURPASSING 899 00:24:40,333 --> 00:24:43,266 THAT OF ANY OTHER CROP. 900 00:24:43,266 --> 00:24:44,200 BASICALLY, IN THE WORLD OF 901 00:24:44,200 --> 00:24:45,400 AGRICULTURAL PRODUCTS, CORN IS 902 00:24:45,400 --> 00:24:48,466 THE UNQUESTIONABLE SUPERSTAR. 903 00:24:48,466 --> 00:24:49,066 BEANS WANNA BE IT, OATS WANNA 904 00:24:49,066 --> 00:24:49,866 FUCK IT. 905 00:24:49,866 --> 00:24:54,433 AND AS THE CORN INDUSTRY HAS 906 00:24:54,433 --> 00:24:55,466 BALLOONED, SOME OF THE BIGGEST 907 00:24:55,466 --> 00:24:56,833 BENEFICIARIES HAVEN'T ACTUALLY 908 00:24:56,833 --> 00:25:00,533 BEEN THE FARMERS THEMSELVES, BUT 909 00:25:00,533 --> 00:25:01,133 ENORMOUS CORPORATIONS-- FROM 910 00:25:01,133 --> 00:25:02,566 THESE FOUR COMPANIES THAT NOW 911 00:25:02,566 --> 00:25:04,433 DOMINATE THE NITROGEN FERTILIZER 912 00:25:04,433 --> 00:25:05,466 INDUSTRY, TO THESE TWO THAT NOW 913 00:25:05,466 --> 00:25:06,066 DOMINATE NEARLY THREE-QUARTERS 914 00:25:06,066 --> 00:25:11,733 OF THE SUPPLY OF SEEDS FOR CORN. 915 00:25:11,733 --> 00:25:12,466 AND AS THE PRODUCTION OF CORN 916 00:25:12,466 --> 00:25:12,966 HAS BECOME INCREASINGLY 917 00:25:12,966 --> 00:25:14,133 INDUSTRIALIZED, THE METHODS 918 00:25:14,233 --> 00:25:14,733 WE'VE USED TO SUPERCHARGE ITS 919 00:25:14,833 --> 00:25:15,966 GROWTH HAVE TAKEN A TOLL ON THE 920 00:25:16,066 --> 00:25:16,300 ENVIRONMENT. 921 00:25:16,300 --> 00:25:19,833 TAKE NITROGEN FERTILIZER. 922 00:25:19,833 --> 00:25:20,766 IT'S NEEDED TO INTENSIVELY FARM 923 00:25:20,766 --> 00:25:23,000 ONE CROP OVER AND OVER AGAIN, 924 00:25:23,000 --> 00:25:26,666 ESPECIALLY IF FARMERS DON'T TAKE 925 00:25:26,666 --> 00:25:28,200 STEPS TO PROTECT THE SOIL'S 926 00:25:28,200 --> 00:25:28,600 NATURAL FERTILITY. 927 00:25:28,600 --> 00:25:29,066 AND CORN USES THE MOST 928 00:25:29,066 --> 00:25:30,300 FERTILIZER OF ALL MAJOR U.S. 929 00:25:30,300 --> 00:25:32,700 CROPS. 930 00:25:32,700 --> 00:25:33,400 AND THAT CAN HAVE CONSEQUENCES 931 00:25:33,400 --> 00:25:34,466 THAT MANY SCIENTISTS-- 932 00:25:34,466 --> 00:25:35,933 INCLUDING THAT GUY YOU SAW 933 00:25:35,933 --> 00:25:38,966 EARLIER-- ARE CONCERNED ABOUT. 934 00:25:38,966 --> 00:25:39,900 BECAUSE NITROGEN FERTILIZER IS 935 00:25:39,900 --> 00:25:41,566 THE BIGGEST CONTRIBUTOR TO A 936 00:25:41,566 --> 00:25:42,433 PROBLEM THAT HAPPENS WHEN 937 00:25:42,433 --> 00:25:43,366 CONTAMINATED WATER ON 938 00:25:43,366 --> 00:25:45,333 AGRICULTURAL LAND LEACHES INTO 939 00:25:45,333 --> 00:25:47,000 GROUNDWATER, OR RUNS OFF INTO 940 00:25:47,000 --> 00:25:48,533 RIVERS AND STREAMS, AND 941 00:25:48,633 --> 00:25:49,066 EVENTUALLY GETS INTO OUR 942 00:25:49,066 --> 00:25:52,166 DRINKING WATER-- WHICH CAN 943 00:25:52,166 --> 00:25:52,766 CAUSE A CONDITION WITH A TRULY 944 00:25:52,766 --> 00:25:59,833 HORRIFYING NAME. 945 00:26:01,000 --> 00:26:02,033 SINCE THE 1940S, SCIENTISTS 946 00:26:02,033 --> 00:26:02,633 HAVE WARNED THAT EXPOSURE TO 947 00:26:02,633 --> 00:26:04,033 EXCESS NITRATES CAN INHIBIT 948 00:26:04,033 --> 00:26:04,533 OXYGEN CIRCULATION IN AN 949 00:26:04,533 --> 00:26:06,200 INFANT'S BLOOD. 950 00:26:06,200 --> 00:26:08,500 CONSUMING HIGH-NITRATE WATER 951 00:26:08,500 --> 00:26:09,166 WILL TEND TO STRIP OXYGEN OUT OF 952 00:26:09,166 --> 00:26:09,433 THE BLOOD. 953 00:26:09,433 --> 00:26:11,400 AND THAT PRODUCES THIS BLUE BABY 954 00:26:11,400 --> 00:26:12,466 SYNDROME. 955 00:26:12,466 --> 00:26:14,600 John: IT'S TRUE. 956 00:26:14,600 --> 00:26:16,066 THERE'S A CONDITION CALLED "BLUE 957 00:26:16,066 --> 00:26:16,866 BABY SYNDROME," WHERE EXCESS 958 00:26:16,866 --> 00:26:19,233 NITRATES DEPRIVE KIDS OF OXYGEN 959 00:26:19,233 --> 00:26:21,166 AND IT CAN BE FATAL. 960 00:26:21,266 --> 00:26:22,466 IT'S SO HORRIFYING, YOU'RE NOT 961 00:26:22,466 --> 00:26:24,600 EVEN REGISTERING THAT THAT MAN 962 00:26:24,600 --> 00:26:26,733 IS CALLED "RANDY BEAVERS." 963 00:26:26,733 --> 00:26:28,366 WHICH IN ANY OTHER SITUATION 964 00:26:28,366 --> 00:26:31,300 WOULD BE ALL ANYONE CARES ABOUT. 965 00:26:31,300 --> 00:26:33,533 AND I DO HOPE WE CAN ALL AGREE: 966 00:26:33,533 --> 00:26:37,533 NO CHILD SHOULD EVER BE TURNED 967 00:26:37,533 --> 00:26:40,166 BLUE UNLESS THEY DISOBEYED 968 00:26:40,166 --> 00:26:41,433 MR. WONKA'S CLEAR INSTRUCTIONS 969 00:26:41,433 --> 00:26:43,200 ABOUT NOT TRYING THE CHEWING 970 00:26:43,200 --> 00:26:44,866 GUM, AND ARE NOW SUFFERING THE 971 00:26:44,866 --> 00:26:45,466 ONLY SLIGHTLY DISPROPORTIONATE 972 00:26:45,466 --> 00:26:46,900 CONSEQUENCES. 973 00:26:46,900 --> 00:26:48,866 AND IT'S NOT JUST HUMANS AT RISK 974 00:26:48,866 --> 00:26:49,266 BECAUSE WHEN THAT 975 00:26:49,266 --> 00:26:50,200 CONTAMINATED RUNOFF EVENTUALLY 976 00:26:50,200 --> 00:26:51,866 WASHES INTO THE SEA, IT CAN 977 00:26:51,866 --> 00:26:52,500 CAUSE SERIOUS PROBLEMS IN THERE, 978 00:26:52,500 --> 00:26:54,633 TOO, AS THIS LOCAL NEWS REPORTER 979 00:26:54,733 --> 00:26:55,600 CHOSE TO TELL PEOPLE IN A 980 00:26:55,700 --> 00:26:58,566 TOTALLY NORMAL WAY. 981 00:26:58,566 --> 00:26:59,133 HERE IS A LITTLE BIT WHAT 982 00:26:59,133 --> 00:27:00,766 IT'S LIKE TO BE A FISH THIS TIME 983 00:27:00,766 --> 00:27:02,500 OF YEAR IN PARTS OF THE 984 00:27:02,500 --> 00:27:06,433 CHESAPEAKE BAY. 985 00:27:06,433 --> 00:27:13,500 I CAN'T BREATHE! 986 00:27:14,366 --> 00:27:14,833 I CAN'T BREATHE! 987 00:27:14,833 --> 00:27:15,433 THAT'S BECAUSE IN THE HOTTEST 988 00:27:15,433 --> 00:27:16,033 PART OF THE SUMMER, AS MUCH AS 989 00:27:16,033 --> 00:27:17,800 15% OF THE BAY HAS NO OXYGEN IN 990 00:27:17,800 --> 00:27:20,300 THE WATER. 991 00:27:20,300 --> 00:27:21,833 IT'S CALLED THE DEAD ZONE. 992 00:27:21,833 --> 00:27:23,466 I CAN'T BREATHE! 993 00:27:23,466 --> 00:27:25,366 John: WHAT ARE YOU DOING? 994 00:27:25,366 --> 00:27:27,400 THE NUMBER ONE THING YOU'RE 995 00:27:27,500 --> 00:27:28,866 TAUGHT AS A CHILD IS NOT TO PUT 996 00:27:28,966 --> 00:27:30,200 A PLASTIC BAG OVER YOUR HEAD, 997 00:27:30,200 --> 00:27:33,066 AND HE'S DOING IT ON TV, WHICH 998 00:27:33,066 --> 00:27:34,166 IS HUGELY RECKLESS! 999 00:27:34,166 --> 00:27:35,100 EVERYONE HAS A PLASTIC BAG, IT'S 1000 00:27:35,100 --> 00:27:35,466 NOT HARD TO GET. 1001 00:27:35,466 --> 00:27:37,333 I'VE GOT ONE RIGHT HERE. 1002 00:27:37,333 --> 00:27:39,466 BUT I KNOW I SHOULDN'T PUT IT 1003 00:27:39,466 --> 00:27:41,166 ON MY HEAD, NOT EVEN TO MAKE A 1004 00:27:41,166 --> 00:27:43,200 POINT ABOUT THE LACK OF OXYGEN 1005 00:27:43,200 --> 00:27:44,566 IN THE CHESAPEAKE BAY, OR ABOUT 1006 00:27:44,566 --> 00:27:45,766 HOW YOU SHOULDN'T PUT A PLASTIC 1007 00:27:45,766 --> 00:27:46,966 BAG ON YOUR HEAD ON TV. 1008 00:27:46,966 --> 00:27:47,733 I COULD DO IT. 1009 00:27:47,733 --> 00:27:48,366 BUT I SHOULDN'T. 1010 00:27:48,366 --> 00:27:50,100 IT'S TEMPTING... 1011 00:27:50,100 --> 00:27:52,433 BUT I WON'T. 1012 00:27:52,433 --> 00:27:52,833 I WON'T. 1013 00:27:52,833 --> 00:27:55,400 CHILDREN ARE WATCHING. 1014 00:27:55,400 --> 00:27:57,400 NOT MINE-- THEY'VE SAID "YOU 1015 00:27:57,400 --> 00:27:57,933 COULDN'T PAY US TO WATCH." 1016 00:27:57,933 --> 00:27:58,533 WHICH, FOR WHAT IT'S WORTH, I 1017 00:27:58,533 --> 00:27:58,833 KIND OF DO. 1018 00:27:58,833 --> 00:27:59,400 ALL THEIR MONEY WAS FIRST MY 1019 00:27:59,400 --> 00:27:59,833 MONEY. 1020 00:27:59,833 --> 00:28:00,933 THAT SAID, IT'S A NO FROM MY 1021 00:28:01,033 --> 00:28:01,166 KIDS. 1022 00:28:01,166 --> 00:28:02,200 ANYWAY. 1023 00:28:02,300 --> 00:28:02,933 I WON'T DO IT. 1024 00:28:02,933 --> 00:28:05,700 BUT THIS ISN'T GOODBYE. 1025 00:28:05,700 --> 00:28:08,966 IT'S SEE YOU LATER. 1026 00:28:08,966 --> 00:28:10,366 AND IT'S NOT JUST THE 1027 00:28:10,366 --> 00:28:12,333 CHESAPEAKE. 1028 00:28:12,333 --> 00:28:13,200 THE GULF OF MEXICO HAS A DEAD 1029 00:28:13,200 --> 00:28:15,133 ZONE THAT AT ONE POINT WAS THE 1030 00:28:15,133 --> 00:28:16,133 SIZE OF NEW JERSEY, WITH STUDIES 1031 00:28:16,133 --> 00:28:16,900 FINDING FARM FERTILIZER IS THE 1032 00:28:16,900 --> 00:28:19,300 SINGLE LARGEST CONTRIBUTOR. 1033 00:28:19,300 --> 00:28:20,900 OVERFARMING OF CORN HAS ALSO LED 1034 00:28:20,900 --> 00:28:22,900 TO SEVERE EROSION IN SOME AREAS, 1035 00:28:22,900 --> 00:28:24,766 WHICH CAN LEAD TO HAZARDOUS DUST 1036 00:28:24,766 --> 00:28:25,000 STORMS. 1037 00:28:25,000 --> 00:28:26,666 IN FACT, THIS STORM FROM LAST 1038 00:28:26,666 --> 00:28:27,700 YEAR IN CENTRAL ILLINOIS KILLED 1039 00:28:27,700 --> 00:28:32,100 SEVEN PEOPLE, AND WAS DIRECTLY 1040 00:28:32,100 --> 00:28:32,833 TIED TO FARMERS TILLING THEIR 1041 00:28:32,833 --> 00:28:34,333 LAND TO PLANT CORN AND SOYBEANS. 1042 00:28:34,433 --> 00:28:35,400 SO WE'VE TALKED ABOUT HOW OUR 1043 00:28:35,500 --> 00:28:37,233 SUBSIDIES FOR CORN HAVE CAUSED 1044 00:28:37,233 --> 00:28:38,366 AN INCREASE IN PRODUCTION, AND 1045 00:28:38,366 --> 00:28:38,966 WE'VE TALKED ABOUT HOW WE GROW 1046 00:28:38,966 --> 00:28:39,866 IT. 1047 00:28:39,866 --> 00:28:45,833 WHICH BRINGS US TO THE THIRD SET 1048 00:28:45,833 --> 00:28:46,766 OF PROBLEMS HERE: WHAT WE PUT IT 1049 00:28:46,766 --> 00:28:46,933 IN. 1050 00:28:46,933 --> 00:28:47,700 AND REMEMBER: 40% OF THE CORN WE 1051 00:28:47,700 --> 00:28:48,266 GROW IS GOING TO FEED COWS, 1052 00:28:48,266 --> 00:28:48,800 HOGS, AND POULTRY. 1053 00:28:48,800 --> 00:28:49,933 AND WHILE LIVESTOCK'S ALWAYS 1054 00:28:49,933 --> 00:28:53,833 BEEN FED SOME CORN, THE USE OF 1055 00:28:53,833 --> 00:28:55,200 IT'S BEEN TURBOCHARGED BY THE 1056 00:28:55,200 --> 00:28:56,200 FACT IT'S NOW SO CHEAP. 1057 00:28:56,200 --> 00:28:56,800 AS ONE JOURNALIST HAS WRITTEN, 1058 00:28:56,800 --> 00:28:57,666 TAXPAYER SUBSIDIES FOR CORN HAVE 1059 00:28:57,666 --> 00:28:59,466 SERVED AS "FINANCIAL JET FUEL" 1060 00:28:59,466 --> 00:29:01,033 FOR A NEW BREED OF INDUSTRIAL 1061 00:29:01,033 --> 00:29:02,233 MEAT PRODUCERS, BECAUSE FEED IS 1062 00:29:02,233 --> 00:29:04,266 THEIR BIGGEST COST. 1063 00:29:04,266 --> 00:29:05,866 BUT THE THING IS, THESE ANIMALS 1064 00:29:05,866 --> 00:29:07,266 AREN'T EVOLVED TO HAVE A DIET 1065 00:29:07,266 --> 00:29:08,966 THAT'S PREDOMINANTLY CORN. 1066 00:29:09,066 --> 00:29:10,433 IT'S BAD FOR THEIR DIGESTIVE 1067 00:29:10,433 --> 00:29:12,333 SYSTEM, AS THIS MAN IN A CAR 1068 00:29:12,333 --> 00:29:14,666 EXPLAINS TO THOSE DOCUMENTARIANS 1069 00:29:14,666 --> 00:29:16,200 YOU SAW EARLIER, IN A WEIRDLY 1070 00:29:16,200 --> 00:29:18,066 CHEERY WAY. 1071 00:29:18,066 --> 00:29:19,200 WHAT ARE YOU EATING FOR LUNCH 1072 00:29:19,200 --> 00:29:19,966 HERE TODAY? 1073 00:29:19,966 --> 00:29:24,233 CORN-FED BEEF! 1074 00:29:24,233 --> 00:29:24,866 DO YOU ACTUALLY KNOW ANYTHING 1075 00:29:24,866 --> 00:29:25,933 ABOUT CORN-FED BEEF? 1076 00:29:25,933 --> 00:29:27,233 DO YOU KNOW WHAT IT DOES TO 'EM? 1077 00:29:27,233 --> 00:29:27,733 WHAT DOES IT-- 1078 00:29:27,733 --> 00:29:29,233 TO THE CATTLE. 1079 00:29:29,233 --> 00:29:30,600 IT'S A GOOD THING THEY SLAUGHTER 1080 00:29:30,600 --> 00:29:31,900 WHEN THEY DO, BECAUSE IT 1081 00:29:31,900 --> 00:29:34,000 ACTUALLY KILLS THEM TO FEED 1082 00:29:34,000 --> 00:29:34,600 THEM-- TO MAKE THE MEAT LIKE 1083 00:29:34,600 --> 00:29:36,433 THAT. 1084 00:29:36,433 --> 00:29:38,200 SO, THEY'D BE DEAD IN SIX MONTHS 1085 00:29:38,200 --> 00:29:39,233 ANYWAY, EATING THAT STUFF. 1086 00:29:39,233 --> 00:29:40,433 SO, IT'S JUST AS WELL WHEN THEY 1087 00:29:40,533 --> 00:29:40,800 SLAUGHTER 'EM. 1088 00:29:40,800 --> 00:29:41,066 REALLY? 1089 00:29:41,066 --> 00:29:41,300 YEAH. 1090 00:29:41,300 --> 00:29:42,333 IT'S TERRIBLE. 1091 00:29:42,433 --> 00:29:44,000 WHERE IS THIS? 1092 00:29:44,000 --> 00:29:45,400 EVERY MAJOR CONFINEMENT 1093 00:29:45,400 --> 00:29:47,100 FEEDLOT EVERYWHERE. 1094 00:29:47,100 --> 00:29:48,733 John: HONESTLY, I KIND OF 1095 00:29:48,733 --> 00:29:50,533 LOVE THAT GUY. 1096 00:29:50,533 --> 00:29:53,200 HE SHOULD BE THE MASCOT FOR 1097 00:29:53,200 --> 00:29:53,900 EVERY FAST FOOD CHAIN. 1098 00:29:53,900 --> 00:29:55,366 FUCK RONALD MCDONALD, THIS IS 1099 00:29:55,366 --> 00:29:56,433 THE MOST ACCURATE MASCOT 1100 00:29:56,433 --> 00:29:58,333 IMAGINABLE: AN IMPOSSIBLY 1101 00:29:58,333 --> 00:30:00,000 AMERICAN MAN WHO THINKS THE FOOD 1102 00:30:00,000 --> 00:30:02,200 TASTES GOOD, KNOWS IT'S TIED TO 1103 00:30:02,200 --> 00:30:03,200 SUFFERING AND ULTIMATELY JUST 1104 00:30:03,200 --> 00:30:04,800 WANTS TO BRING HIS WILDCARD 1105 00:30:04,800 --> 00:30:06,800 ENERGY TO THE PARKING LOT. 1106 00:30:06,800 --> 00:30:09,300 THIS IS MY BURGER KING. 1107 00:30:09,300 --> 00:30:11,500 AND THE PROBLEMS CORN CAUSES FOR 1108 00:30:11,500 --> 00:30:13,033 THE DIGESTIVE SYSTEMS OF 1109 00:30:13,033 --> 00:30:15,000 LIVESTOCK CAN LEAVE CATTLE MORE 1110 00:30:15,100 --> 00:30:16,133 SUSCEPTIBLE TO LIVER ABSCESSES, 1111 00:30:16,233 --> 00:30:17,433 WHICH IS A MAJOR REASON WHY 1112 00:30:17,433 --> 00:30:19,800 ANTIBIOTICS ARE OFTEN ADDED TO 1113 00:30:19,800 --> 00:30:21,866 THE FEED OF ENTIRE HERDS OF BEEF 1114 00:30:21,866 --> 00:30:24,133 CATTLE, A PRACTICE THE W.H.O. 1115 00:30:24,133 --> 00:30:24,900 HAS DISCOURAGED, OUT OF CONCERN 1116 00:30:24,900 --> 00:30:25,933 IT'S CONTRIBUTING TO EXPANDING 1117 00:30:25,933 --> 00:30:27,666 ANTIBIOTIC RESISTANCE. 1118 00:30:27,666 --> 00:30:30,766 AND I ADMIT, IT'S MUCH LESS FUN 1119 00:30:30,766 --> 00:30:32,233 TO LEARN ABOUT THAT FROM ME THAN 1120 00:30:32,233 --> 00:30:32,833 IT WOULD'VE BEEN FROM THAT GUY 1121 00:30:32,833 --> 00:30:34,333 ABSOLUTELY HOUSING HIS 1122 00:30:34,333 --> 00:30:34,933 CHEESEBURGER. 1123 00:30:34,933 --> 00:30:36,433 "YEAH, MEDICATED FEED MIGHT GIVE 1124 00:30:36,433 --> 00:30:37,966 US ALL ANTIBIOTIC RESISTANT 1125 00:30:37,966 --> 00:30:38,500 UTI'S. 1126 00:30:38,500 --> 00:30:39,833 BON APPETIT! 1127 00:30:39,833 --> 00:30:42,300 CORN-FED BEEF!" 1128 00:30:42,300 --> 00:30:43,233 BUT MAYBE THE MOST RIDICULOUS 1129 00:30:43,233 --> 00:30:45,133 WAY WE USE CORN IS ETHANOL-- 1130 00:30:45,133 --> 00:30:46,466 WHICH, REMEMBER, ACCOUNTS FOR 1131 00:30:46,466 --> 00:30:50,033 45% OF OUR DOMESTIC CORN USE. 1132 00:30:50,033 --> 00:30:51,666 ETHANOL USED TO BE KNOWN AS 1133 00:30:51,666 --> 00:30:54,200 GASOHOL, AND WHILE IT'S BEEN 1134 00:30:54,200 --> 00:30:55,266 AROUND SINCE THE '30S, IT WAS 1135 00:30:55,266 --> 00:30:56,600 DURING THE 1970S ENERGY CRISIS 1136 00:30:56,600 --> 00:30:57,200 THAT IT REALLY TOOK OFF, WITH 1137 00:30:57,200 --> 00:30:58,333 BOOSTERS LIKE THIS ILLINOIS 1138 00:30:58,333 --> 00:30:59,733 AGRICULTURE OFFICIAL LEADING THE 1139 00:30:59,733 --> 00:31:01,266 WAY, WITH AN UNFORTUNATE 1140 00:31:01,266 --> 00:31:04,466 HISTORICAL ANALOGY. 1141 00:31:04,466 --> 00:31:05,166 MR. MAVIS, WHY ARE YOU SO 1142 00:31:05,166 --> 00:31:09,166 HIGH ON GASOHOL? 1143 00:31:09,166 --> 00:31:10,933 WELL, AS YOU CAN TELL, I HAVE 1144 00:31:10,933 --> 00:31:12,666 SOME AGE ON ME, CHARLAYNE, AND 1145 00:31:12,666 --> 00:31:13,300 PROBABLY SINCE PEARL HARBOR IT'S 1146 00:31:13,300 --> 00:31:15,433 THE ONLY THING I'VE SEEN THAT'S 1147 00:31:15,433 --> 00:31:17,366 BEEN GOOD FOR ALL OF AMERICA. 1148 00:31:17,366 --> 00:31:20,166 John: HUH! 1149 00:31:20,266 --> 00:31:21,566 THAT'S A PRETTY WEIRD WAY TO 1150 00:31:21,666 --> 00:31:24,333 CHARACTERIZE PEARL HARBOR, THE 1151 00:31:24,333 --> 00:31:24,966 SURPRISE ATTACK THAT KILLED OVER 1152 00:31:24,966 --> 00:31:25,833 2400 PEOPLE AND LED TO THE U.S. 1153 00:31:25,833 --> 00:31:27,533 ENTERING WORLD WAR TWO. 1154 00:31:27,533 --> 00:31:28,300 BUT YOU KNOW WHAT? 1155 00:31:28,300 --> 00:31:30,200 LET'S GIVE HIM A BREAK, HE 1156 00:31:30,200 --> 00:31:30,866 PROBABLY JUST MISSPOKE. 1157 00:31:30,866 --> 00:31:32,866 I'M SURE HE WON'T SAY IT AGAIN. 1158 00:31:32,866 --> 00:31:34,900 IT BURNS WITHOUT THE USE OF 1159 00:31:34,900 --> 00:31:36,833 TETRAETHYL LEAD, ELIMINATES AN 1160 00:31:36,833 --> 00:31:37,666 EPA PROBLEM, IT EMPLOYS PEOPLE 1161 00:31:37,666 --> 00:31:39,866 IN AMERICA, IT TAKES AN 1162 00:31:39,866 --> 00:31:41,933 AGRICULTURAL SURPLUS THAT'S 1163 00:31:41,933 --> 00:31:43,166 KILLING US AND TURNS IT INTO 1164 00:31:43,166 --> 00:31:44,166 DOLLARS INSTEAD OF STORAGE, IT'S 1165 00:31:44,166 --> 00:31:45,466 THAT-- IT'S THAT PEARL HARBOR 1166 00:31:45,466 --> 00:31:52,033 WE'VE NEEDED. 1167 00:31:52,033 --> 00:31:54,166 John: OKAY, OKAY. 1168 00:31:54,266 --> 00:31:55,466 THE FIRST TIME HE SAID IT, I 1169 00:31:55,566 --> 00:31:58,200 THOUGHT, I DON'T THINK AL MAVIS 1170 00:31:58,200 --> 00:31:58,766 KNOWS WHAT PEARL HARBOR IS. 1171 00:31:58,766 --> 00:32:00,166 THE SECOND TIME I THOUGHT, 1172 00:32:00,166 --> 00:32:00,766 "MAYBE I DON'T KNOW WHAT PEARL 1173 00:32:00,766 --> 00:32:02,200 HARBOR IS." 1174 00:32:02,200 --> 00:32:05,100 BECAUSE WHAT IS GOING ON THERE? 1175 00:32:05,100 --> 00:32:06,200 WAS AL MAVIS, OF THE ILLINOIS 1176 00:32:06,200 --> 00:32:07,233 DEPARTMENT OF AGRICULTURE, AN 1177 00:32:07,233 --> 00:32:09,633 ADMIRAL IN THE JAPANESE NAVY? 1178 00:32:09,633 --> 00:32:10,866 BECAUSE I DON'T KNOW WHAT THE 1179 00:32:10,866 --> 00:32:12,733 OTHER EXPLANATIONS COULD BE. 1180 00:32:12,733 --> 00:32:13,366 I'M JUST SAYING-- AT THIS POINT 1181 00:32:13,366 --> 00:32:13,900 I CAN ONLY ASSUME THAT THE 1182 00:32:13,900 --> 00:32:16,033 PEOPLE WHO KNEW HIM SPENT 9/11 1183 00:32:16,033 --> 00:32:16,866 TEARFULLY GOING, "AL WOULD HAVE 1184 00:32:16,866 --> 00:32:20,300 LOVED THIS." 1185 00:32:20,300 --> 00:32:21,533 BUT AL MAVIS GOT HIS WAY. 1186 00:32:21,533 --> 00:32:22,966 BASICALLY, IN AN ATTEMPT TO 1187 00:32:22,966 --> 00:32:24,866 REDUCE OUR DEPENDENCY ON FOREIGN 1188 00:32:24,866 --> 00:32:25,466 OIL, WE PASSED THE ENERGY TAX 1189 00:32:25,466 --> 00:32:28,066 ACT OF 1978 WHICH ENCOURAGED THE 1190 00:32:28,166 --> 00:32:30,800 USE OF GASOHOL-- ETHANOL. 1191 00:32:30,800 --> 00:32:32,566 BUT WHAT REALLY SET THE WHEELS 1192 00:32:32,566 --> 00:32:33,900 IN MOTION FOR OUR HUGE ETHANOL 1193 00:32:33,900 --> 00:32:36,500 INDUSTRY TODAY WAS THE 2005 1194 00:32:36,500 --> 00:32:38,400 ENERGY BILL THAT CREATED THE 1195 00:32:38,400 --> 00:32:39,000 RENEWABLE FUEL STANDARD, WHICH 1196 00:32:39,000 --> 00:32:40,900 MANDATED THAT A CERTAIN AMOUNT 1197 00:32:40,900 --> 00:32:42,500 OF RENEWABLE FUEL HAD TO BE 1198 00:32:42,500 --> 00:32:43,666 BLENDED INTO THE DOMESTIC 1199 00:32:43,666 --> 00:32:44,533 GASOLINE SUPPLY. 1200 00:32:44,533 --> 00:32:48,566 ESSENTIALLY, EVERY GALLON OF 1201 00:32:48,566 --> 00:32:49,166 DOMESTIC GASOLINE NOW LEGALLY 1202 00:32:49,166 --> 00:32:50,033 HAS TO HAVE AT LEAST A LITTLE 1203 00:32:50,033 --> 00:32:51,500 BIT OF ETHANOL IN IT, THE SAME 1204 00:32:51,500 --> 00:32:52,833 WAY EVERY POP ALBUM CURRENTLY 1205 00:32:52,833 --> 00:32:54,533 HAS TO HAVE AT LEAST A LITTLE 1206 00:32:54,533 --> 00:32:55,000 BIT OF JACK ANTONOFF. 1207 00:32:55,000 --> 00:32:58,166 IT'S JUST THE LAW NOW. 1208 00:32:58,166 --> 00:32:59,866 UNDERSTANDABLY, THAT MANDATE 1209 00:32:59,866 --> 00:33:00,466 CREATED EVEN MORE DEMAND FOR 1210 00:33:00,466 --> 00:33:01,666 CORN IN THE DOMESTIC MARKET. 1211 00:33:01,766 --> 00:33:02,733 AND SOME, LIKE THIS IOWA FARMER, 1212 00:33:02,733 --> 00:33:06,366 WERE THRILLED BY THAT. 1213 00:33:06,366 --> 00:33:07,300 WE'VE SEEN OUR YIELDS RAISE 1214 00:33:07,300 --> 00:33:08,333 QUITE A BIT IN THE LAST SEVERAL 1215 00:33:08,333 --> 00:33:09,000 YEARS. 1216 00:33:09,000 --> 00:33:09,766 AND WE NEEDED A PLACE FOR THIS 1217 00:33:09,766 --> 00:33:11,600 EXTRA CORN TO BE GOING, AND 1218 00:33:11,600 --> 00:33:12,633 ETHANOL HAS FILLED THAT FOR US. 1219 00:33:12,633 --> 00:33:14,366 I'M SURE THERE ARE SOME 1220 00:33:14,366 --> 00:33:16,300 NEGATIVES, BUT I GUESS I-- I'M 1221 00:33:16,300 --> 00:33:23,366 NOT THINKING OF THEM RIGHT NOW. 1222 00:33:23,466 --> 00:33:24,766 John: YEAH, I'M SURE YOU'RE 1223 00:33:24,766 --> 00:33:25,200 NOT. 1224 00:33:25,200 --> 00:33:27,266 AND TO BE FAIR, THAT'S NOT 1225 00:33:27,266 --> 00:33:28,333 REALLY YOUR JOB. 1226 00:33:28,333 --> 00:33:31,433 BUT UNFORTUNATELY, IT "IS" MINE. 1227 00:33:31,433 --> 00:33:32,166 THINKING OF THE NEGATIVES IS 1228 00:33:32,166 --> 00:33:35,566 PRETTY MUCH ALL I DO, ALONG WITH 1229 00:33:35,666 --> 00:33:36,600 SPEAKING THE NEGATIVES OUT LOUD 1230 00:33:36,600 --> 00:33:37,133 AND MAKING JOKES ABOUT THE 1231 00:33:37,133 --> 00:33:37,800 NEGATIVES ALL WHILE MODELING THE 1232 00:33:37,800 --> 00:33:40,366 LATEST SUITS FROM "SIR MICHAEL 1233 00:33:40,366 --> 00:33:41,000 GAMBON'S HABERDASHERY FOR ODDLY 1234 00:33:41,000 --> 00:33:43,966 LONG GENTLEMEN." 1235 00:33:43,966 --> 00:33:47,366 AND THE TRUTH IS, THERE ARE 1236 00:33:47,366 --> 00:33:47,900 LOTS OF NEGATIVES WHEN IT 1237 00:33:47,900 --> 00:33:48,300 COMES TO ETHANOL. 1238 00:33:48,300 --> 00:33:49,733 MAINLY BECAUSE THE POSITIVES 1239 00:33:49,733 --> 00:33:51,600 HAVE BEEN WILDLY OVERSTATED. 1240 00:33:51,600 --> 00:33:52,800 WHILE ETHANOL LOBBYING GROUPS 1241 00:33:52,800 --> 00:33:54,500 HAVE LONG ARGUED THAT IT SLASHES 1242 00:33:54,500 --> 00:33:55,500 GREENHOUSE EMISSIONS, ONE RECENT 1243 00:33:55,500 --> 00:33:58,666 STUDY FOUND THAT, THANKS TO THE 1244 00:33:58,666 --> 00:33:59,733 FERTILIZER AND LAND-USE CHANGES 1245 00:33:59,733 --> 00:34:00,866 NEEDED TO GROW THE CORN FOR IT, 1246 00:34:00,866 --> 00:34:01,733 CORN ETHANOL PRODUCED UNDER THE 1247 00:34:01,733 --> 00:34:03,466 RENEWABLE FUEL STANDARD HAS A 1248 00:34:03,466 --> 00:34:04,066 CARBON FOOTPRINT AT LEAST 24% 1249 00:34:04,066 --> 00:34:09,533 HIGHER THAN REGULAR GASOLINE. 1250 00:34:09,533 --> 00:34:10,500 ON TOP OF THAT, THE DEMAND FOR 1251 00:34:10,500 --> 00:34:12,866 ETHANOL IS NOW EXPANDING CORN 1252 00:34:12,866 --> 00:34:13,700 PRODUCTION TO AREAS WHERE IT'S 1253 00:34:13,700 --> 00:34:16,233 MUCH LESS-SUITED TO BE GROWN, 1254 00:34:16,233 --> 00:34:17,333 PLACES LIKE TEXAS AND WESTERN 1255 00:34:17,333 --> 00:34:18,500 KANSAS, WHERE THE SHORTAGE OF 1256 00:34:18,500 --> 00:34:19,766 WATER MEANS CORN FIELDS NEED TO 1257 00:34:19,766 --> 00:34:21,766 BE IRRIGATED. 1258 00:34:21,766 --> 00:34:23,800 BUT THAT'S A PROBLEM, BECAUSE 1259 00:34:23,800 --> 00:34:25,666 CORN IS A WATER-INTENSIVE CROP, 1260 00:34:25,666 --> 00:34:27,333 AND IT CAN TAKE HUNDREDS OF 1261 00:34:27,333 --> 00:34:28,566 GALLONS OF WATER TO PRODUCE A 1262 00:34:28,566 --> 00:34:30,000 SINGLE GALLON OF ETHANOL. 1263 00:34:30,000 --> 00:34:31,700 AND THIS IS ALL HAPPENING EVEN 1264 00:34:31,700 --> 00:34:32,500 AS GROUNDWATER IS BEING 1265 00:34:32,500 --> 00:34:34,600 DANGEROUSLY DEPLETED NATIONWIDE. 1266 00:34:34,600 --> 00:34:36,633 AND THAT BRINGS US BACK TO OUR 1267 00:34:36,633 --> 00:34:37,566 LARGER POINT-- WHILE, FOR SOME 1268 00:34:37,566 --> 00:34:40,266 BIG FARM OPERATIONS, AND 1269 00:34:40,266 --> 00:34:41,066 ESPECIALLY THE BIG COMPANIES 1270 00:34:41,166 --> 00:34:43,166 THAT BENEFIT FROM CORN, THERE 1271 00:34:43,166 --> 00:34:44,633 MAY BE NO NEGATIVES TO THE 1272 00:34:44,633 --> 00:34:46,333 CURRENT WAY WE PRODUCE IT, FOR 1273 00:34:46,333 --> 00:34:48,033 EVERYONE ELSE, THERE REALLY ARE, 1274 00:34:48,033 --> 00:34:51,033 FROM DUST STORMS TO SICK COWS TO 1275 00:34:51,033 --> 00:34:52,833 BLUE BABIES TO THIS REPORTER 1276 00:34:52,833 --> 00:34:55,533 FROM YOUR ABSOLUTE NIGHTMARES. 1277 00:34:55,533 --> 00:34:56,700 SO WHAT CAN WE DO? 1278 00:34:56,700 --> 00:34:57,933 WELL, FOR STARTERS, I'D ARGUE WE 1279 00:34:57,933 --> 00:35:01,133 HAVE TO RETHINK THE RENEWABLE 1280 00:35:01,133 --> 00:35:02,266 FUEL STANDARD, BECAUSE IT JUST 1281 00:35:02,266 --> 00:35:03,100 MAKES NO SENSE. 1282 00:35:03,100 --> 00:35:03,933 BUT ON TOP OF THAT, WE MIGHT 1283 00:35:03,933 --> 00:35:04,766 WANT TO SIGNIFICANTLY RESET OUR 1284 00:35:04,766 --> 00:35:06,333 FARM POLICY. 1285 00:35:06,333 --> 00:35:07,633 ONE IDEA THAT'S BEEN FLOATED IS 1286 00:35:07,633 --> 00:35:09,000 TO MAKE THE FEDERAL SAFETY NET 1287 00:35:09,000 --> 00:35:10,633 FOR FARMERS CONTINGENT ON THEM 1288 00:35:10,633 --> 00:35:12,700 HAVING A STRATEGY FOR THINGS 1289 00:35:12,700 --> 00:35:15,000 LIKE PRESERVING TOPSOIL, 1290 00:35:15,100 --> 00:35:15,666 CONTROLLING CHEMICAL RUNOFF, AND 1291 00:35:15,666 --> 00:35:16,333 REDUCING GREENHOUSE GAS 1292 00:35:16,333 --> 00:35:17,133 EMISSIONS. 1293 00:35:17,133 --> 00:35:18,866 AND THE GOOD NEWS IS, THE FARM 1294 00:35:18,866 --> 00:35:19,466 BILL IS ACTUALLY CURRENTLY UP 1295 00:35:19,466 --> 00:35:20,633 FOR RENEWAL, AND WE COULD DO ALL 1296 00:35:20,633 --> 00:35:22,733 THAT! 1297 00:35:22,733 --> 00:35:24,266 THE BAD NEWS IS, AS YOU'VE SEEN, 1298 00:35:24,266 --> 00:35:25,000 THERE ARE POWERFUL INTERESTS 1299 00:35:25,000 --> 00:35:26,600 WITH NO REASON TO WANT THE 1300 00:35:26,600 --> 00:35:27,166 STATUS QUO TO CHANGE AT ALL. 1301 00:35:27,166 --> 00:35:29,066 BUT IT JUST HAS TO. 1302 00:35:29,066 --> 00:35:33,200 AND LET ME BE CLEAR: THIS ISN'T 1303 00:35:33,200 --> 00:35:33,933 A TAKEDOWN OF CORN. 1304 00:35:33,933 --> 00:35:34,633 I KNOW FOR LARGE SWATHS OF 1305 00:35:34,633 --> 00:35:36,033 AMERICA, IT'S AN UNDERSTANDABLE 1306 00:35:36,033 --> 00:35:37,400 SYMBOL OF PRIDE. 1307 00:35:37,400 --> 00:35:41,166 AND I GET THAT IT'S FRUSTRATING 1308 00:35:41,166 --> 00:35:43,400 TO BE LECTURED ABOUT IT, OR BE 1309 00:35:43,400 --> 00:35:44,566 PANDERED TO BY A POLITICIAN 1310 00:35:44,566 --> 00:35:45,166 PRETENDING TO BE FASCINATED BY 1311 00:35:45,166 --> 00:35:49,133 ITS EARS. 1312 00:35:49,133 --> 00:35:49,966 BUT I DO THINK IT'S LONG PAST 1313 00:35:49,966 --> 00:35:51,400 TIME WE SHIFT OUR FARMING POLICY 1314 00:35:51,400 --> 00:35:52,833 WHEN IT COMES TO AMERICA'S 1315 00:35:52,833 --> 00:35:53,500 NUMBER-ONE CROP. 1316 00:35:53,500 --> 00:35:55,366 AND MAYBE THE BEST WAY TO DRIVE 1317 00:35:55,366 --> 00:35:56,200 THIS HOME IS TO EXPLAIN IT IN 1318 00:35:56,200 --> 00:35:59,166 THE WAY PEOPLE SEEM TO MOST 1319 00:35:59,166 --> 00:36:00,900 ENJOY BEING EDUCATED ABOUT CORN, 1320 00:36:00,900 --> 00:36:04,366 AND THAT IS-- WATCHING SOMEONE 1321 00:36:04,366 --> 00:36:07,266 BE ABSOLUTELY ASSAULTED BY IT. 1322 00:36:07,266 --> 00:36:07,966 BECAUSE LOOK, CORN IS AS 1323 00:36:07,966 --> 00:36:10,133 BEAUTIFUL TO WATCH GROW AS IT IS 1324 00:36:10,133 --> 00:36:14,300 TO EAT SLATHERED IN BUTTER. 1325 00:36:14,300 --> 00:36:16,100 BUT UNLESS WE FORCE THE 1326 00:36:16,100 --> 00:36:16,866 GOVERNMENT AND THE HANDFUL OF 1327 00:36:16,866 --> 00:36:19,533 LARGE COMPANIES THAT CONTROL 1328 00:36:19,533 --> 00:36:20,866 THIS INDUSTRY TO CHANGE THEIR 1329 00:36:20,966 --> 00:36:23,000 PRIORITIES, WE'RE GOING TO BE 1330 00:36:23,000 --> 00:36:24,300 STUCK WHERE WE ARE, LIKE A BUNCH 1331 00:36:24,300 --> 00:36:26,100 OF FIFTH GRADERS IN THE WORLD'S 1332 00:36:26,100 --> 00:36:27,400 LARGEST CORN MAZE BEGGING FOR 1333 00:36:27,400 --> 00:36:31,266 OUR FUCKING LIVES. 1334 00:36:31,266 --> 00:36:32,000 THAT IS OUR SHOW. 1335 00:36:32,000 --> 00:36:32,566 THANKS SO MUCH FOR WATCHING. 1336 00:36:32,566 --> 00:36:33,800 WE'RE OFF NEXT WEEK, WE'LL BE 1337 00:36:33,800 --> 00:36:36,833 BACK THE WEEK AFTER THAT, GOOD 1338 00:36:36,833 --> 00:36:40,866 NIGHT! 1339 00:36:40,866 --> 00:36:42,200 HOW THE FUCK DO I GET OUT OF 1340 00:36:42,200 --> 00:36:45,700 HERE? 1341 00:36:45,700 --> 00:36:48,466 IS IT-- IS IT THIS WAY? 1342 00:36:48,466 --> 00:36:52,200 GET OFF ME. 1343 00:36:52,200 --> 00:36:55,866 GIVE ME SOME PERSONAL SPACE. 1344 00:36:55,966 --> 00:36:59,400 I DON'T LIKE TO BE TOUCHED BY A 1345 00:36:59,400 --> 00:37:00,500 CORN. 1346 00:37:00,500 --> 00:37:01,033 MILLIONS OF GERMANS AND 1347 00:37:01,033 --> 00:37:01,933 MIGRANTS IN