♪ ♪
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]
>> John: WELCOME, WELCOME,
WELCOME TO "LAST WEEK TONIGHT"!
I'M JOHN OLIVER, THANKS FOR
JOINING US.
IT HAS BEEN A BUSY WEEK!
HURRICANE HELENE CAUSED
DEVASTATION ACROSS THE
SOUTHEAST, ISRAEL KILLED THE
LEADER OF HEZBOLLAH,
DRAMATICALLY ESCALATING TENSIONS
IN THE REGION, AND HERE IN
NEW YORK, AN ANCHOR ON
"NEW YORK ONE" HAD THE MOMENT
EVERYONE THERE DREAMS OF.
>> WE HAVE BREAKING NEWS FOR YOU
HERE ON NEW YORK 1, ACCORDING TO
MULTIPLE REPORTS, INCLUDING
"THE NEW YORK TIMES."
MAYOR ERIC ADAMS HAS BEEN.
INDICTED BY FEDERAL PROSECUTORS.
>> John: I LOVE THAT DELIVERY.
HE FINALLY GOT HIS BIG BREAKING
NEWS MOMENT, AND WAS JUSTIFIABLY
SAVORING IT.
IF I KEEP TALKING LIKE THIS,
I CAN MAKE THIS MOMENT LAST.
FOREVER.
SORRY, JAMIE WITH THE WEATHER,
THIS IS MY FUCKING TIME.
BUT IT'S TRUE, ERIC ADAMS WAS.
INDICTED.
THIS WEEK, FOR -- AMONG OTHER
THINGS -- ALLEGEDLY TAKING
BRIBES FOR POLITICAL FAVORS.
HE'S ACCUSED OF RECEIVING FREE
AND STEEPLY DISCOUNTED FLIGHT
$100,000 AND FREE STAYS IN
OPULENT HOTEL SUITES.
AND NOT JUST THAT -- HE'S ALSO
ACCUSED OF KNOWINGLY ACCEPTING
ILLEGAL CAMPAIGN CONTRIBUTIONS
FROM FOREIGN DONORS -- SOME OF
WHICH, BY THE WAY, HELPED HIM
QUALIFY FOR MORE THAN $10
MILLION IN MATCHING PUBLIC
CAMPAIGN FUNDS.
THE INDICTMENT FOCUSES PRIMARILY
ON GIFTS AND DONATIONS FROM
TURKEY, WHICH IS INTERESTING
ENOUGH -- BUT HONESTLY, EVERY
DETAIL IN IT IS INCREDIBLE.
>> ACCORDING TO THE INDICTMENT,
WHEN THE MAYOR'S STAFF MEMBER
ONCE ASKED A TURKISH AIRLINES
OFFICIAL WHERE ADAMS COULD STAY
WHILE VISITING TURKEY THE
OFFICIAL REPLIED, "FOUR
SEASONS."
"IT'S TOO EXPENSIVE," THE
STAFFER RESPONDED.
"WHY DOES HE CARE?"
SAID THE OFFICIAL.
"HE IS NOT GOING TO PAY.
HIS NAME WILL NOT BE ON ANYTHING
EITHER."
THE MAYOR'S STAFFER REPLIED,
"SUPER."
>> John: WOW.
FIRST, MAYBE DON'T ASSURE
SOMEONE NOTHING WILL BE IN
WRITING, "IN WRITING."
YOU CAN FIND MORE HELPFUL TIPS
LIKE THAT IN MY BOOK "FLAGRANT
CORRUPTION FOR LITERAL DUMMIES."
BUT I LOVE THE AIRLINE OFFICIAL
GETTING A LITTLE BIT SASSY WITH
THE "WHY DOES HE CARE" THERE.
"BITCH: IT'S A BRIBE.
THERE'S NOT GONNA BE A RECEIPT.
RELAX."
ADAMS ALLEGEDLY GOT SO USED TO
GETTING PREFERENTIAL TREATMENT
ON TURKISH AIRLINES THAT HE FLEW
ON IT EVEN WHEN DOING SO WAS
OTHERWISE INCONVENIENT.
DURING ONE FLIGHT FROM NEW YORK
TO FRANCE, HE SOMEHOW ENDED UP
IN TURKEY, AND WHEN HIS PARTNER
ASKED WHY, HE SAID "TRANSFERRING
HERE.
YOU KNOW FIRST STOP IS ALWAYS
ISTANBUL."
WHICH IS STUPID, BUT ALSO, A
PRETTY GOOD TOURISM SLOGAN FOR
ISTANBUL.
I'D SAY ERIC ADAMS GAVE THAT TO
THEM FOR FREE, BUT THEY CLEARLY
VERY MUCH PAID HIM FOR IT.
ADAMS ALSO APPARENTLY ONCE ASKED
WHETHER TURKISH AIRLINES COULD
FLY HIM TO EASTER ISLAND,
FORCING THE AIRLINE TO CONFIRM
THAT THEY DID NOT HAVE ROUTES
BETWEEN NEW YORK AND CHILE
BECAUSE OF, YOU KNOW, HOW A
GLOBE WORKS.
AND HE DID SEEM TO KNOW WHAT HE
WAS DOING WAS SHADY, GIVEN AN
AIDE ONCE REMINDED HIM TO
"PLEASE DELETE ALL TEXT MESSAGES
YOU SEND ME," TO WHICH ADAMS
RESPONDED, "ALWAYS DO."
AND THAT WAS CLEARLY A FOOLPROOF
PLAN, GIVEN I'M READING
THOSE TEXTS TO YOU RIGHT NOW.
AND LOOK, IF YOU HAPPEN TO BE
UNFAMILIAR WITH ERIC ADAMS:
FIRST, I WISH I LIVED INSIDE
YOUR MIND.
BUT YOU SHOULD KNOW: HE'S AN
EX-COP, LONGTIME RESIDENT OF
NEW JERSEY, AND ARGUABLY THE
WEIRDEST MAYOR IN THIS CITY'S
HISTORY.
AND WE'RE NO STRANGER TO WEIRD
MAYORS.
IN RECENT YEARS, WE'VE HAD
GOOBER SLENDERMAN, BILLIONAIRE
LAWN GNOME, AND A MAN WHO WAS
DISBARRED IN D.C. THIS WEEK FOR
HIS EFFORTS TO OVERTURN A
PRESIDENTIAL ELECTION.
BUT ERIC ADAMS TAKES THE CAKE.
AND WHILE THERE'S NO SINGLE CLIP
THAT CAN TRULY CAPTURE HIS
CHAOTIC ESSENCE, IF I HAD TO
PICK ONE, IT'D BE THIS MOMENT
FROM LAST DECEMBER -- WHICH
STARTS WITH THE SOFTEST OF
SOFTBALL QUESTIONS, AND GOES
SOMEWHERE I GUARANTEE YOU'RE NOT
EXPECTING.
>> SO WHEN YOU LOOK AT THE
TOTALITY OF THE YEAR, IF YOU HAD
TO DESCRIBE IT IN THE -- IT'S
TOUGH TO DO IN ONE WORD -- WHAT
WOULD THAT WORD BE, AND TELL ME
WHY.
>> NEW YORK.
THIS IS A PLACE WHERE EVERYDAY
YOU WAKE UP, YOU CAN EXPERIENCE
EVERYTHING FROM A PLANE CRASHING
INTO OUR TRADE CENTER, TO A
PERSON WHO'S CELEBRATING A NEW
BUSINESS THAT'S OPEN.
>> John: HE IS, SADLY,
UNSPEAKABLY FUNNY.
HIS TWO ANSWERS FOR WHAT MAKES
NEW YORK SPECIAL -- WHICH WAS,
AND I CAN'T STRESS THIS ENOUGH,
NOT THE QUESTION HE WAS ASKED --
WERE ONE, 9/11, THE TERRORIST
ATTACK, AND TWO, "A PERSON WHO'S
CELEBRATING A NEW BUSINESS
THAT'S OPEN," A THING THAT COULD
HAPPEN IN LITERALLY ANY CITY AT
ANY MOMENT.
WHAT THE FUCK IS HE TALKING
ABOUT?
IT FEELS LIKE HIS BRAIN IS JUST
A VERSION OF CHAT GPT THAT WAS
TRAINED ON CITIBANK ADS AND
OSAMA BIN LADEN'S VISION BOARD.
EVEN GIULIANI IS LIKE "I DUNNO
IF I'D HAVE SHOEHORNED 9/11 IN
THERE."
ADAMS AND HIS INNER CIRCLE HAVE
ACTUALLY BEEN UNDER MULTIPLE
INVESTIGATIONS FOR NEARLY A YEAR
NOW -- THIS MONTH ALONE HAS
BROUGHT THE RESIGNATIONS OF HIS
CHIEF OF POLICE, SCHOOLS
CHANCELLOR, AND CHIEF COUNSEL.
SO THIS INDICTMENT WASN'T A
SURPRISE -- IT'S BEEN
ANTICIPATED SINCE LAST NOVEMBER,
WHEN FEDERAL AGENTS SEIZED
ADAMS'S PHONE AND iPAD.
AND LOOK, IT'S NOT LIKE THE FBI
HAS NEVER INVESTIGATED ANYONE
FOR BULLSHIT REASONS, AND ADAMS
IS ENTITLED TO DUE PROCESS LIKE
ANYONE ELSE.
BUT HE'S NOT BEEN HELPING
HIMSELF.
LAST YEAR, ADAMS SAID HE'D BE
"SHOCKED" IF ANYONE ON HIS
CAMPAIGN HAD ACTED ILLEGALLY,
BECAUSE, QUOTE, "I CANNOT TELL
YOU HOW MUCH I START THE DAY
WITH TELLING MY TEAM WE'VE GOT
TO FOLLOW THE LAW."
AND I'M NOT CONVINCED YOU HAVE A
TON OF RESPECT FOR THE LAW IF
EVERY DAY YOU HAVE TO HYPE
YOURSELF UP INTO OBEYING IT.
AND ADAMS'S COZINESS WITH TURKEY
HAS ALWAYS SEEMED A LITTLE
WEIRD.
BACK WHEN HE WAS BROOKLYN
BOROUGH PRESIDENT HE EVEN
APPEARED IN A TURKISH ROMCOM, IN
WHICH TWO SUPPORTING CHARACTERS
HAD A PRETTY TELLING
CONVERSATION WITH HIM.
>> SIR, CAN I ADD A STORY TO MY
BUILDING?
COULD YOU PLEASE SHOW ME A WAY
TO DO THAT?
>> THE HONORABLE MAYOR, PRECIOUS
MR. ERIC.
WE HAD SO MANY PROBLEMS AFTER WE
DECIDED TO OPEN A GYRO
RESTAURANT.
COULD YOU PLEASE GRANT ME A
LICENSE?
>> YOU GUYS ARE FROM TURKEY.
BROOKLYN LOVES TURKEY.
BROOKLYN IS THE ISTANBUL OF
AMERICA.
WE LOVE YOUR FOOD, WE LOVE YOUR
MUSIC, BUT I DON'T UNDERSTAND
TURKISH.
WE CAN TAKE A SELFIE THOUGH.
>> John: OKAY, IT'S NOT A GREAT
SIGN WHEN EVEN THE FICTIONAL
VERSION OF YOURSELF IS BEING
APPROACHED FOR POLITICAL FAVORS.
BUT ALSO, BROOKLYN IS THE
ISTANBUL OF AMERICA?"
THAT IS A STRETCH.
BUT WHILE THAT CLIP HAS AGED
POORLY, I'D ARGUE NOT AS BADLY
AS THIS ONE, FROM JUST A YEAR
AGO.
>> DIDDY FINALLY HAS THE KEY TO
THE CITY!
THE BAD BOY OF ENTERTAINMENT
IS GETTING THE KEY TO THE CITY
FROM THE BAD BOY OF POLITICS!"
>> John: HEY!
HEY!
HEY, YOU MIGHT NOT WANT TO
ASSOCIATE WITH THAT GUY.
BECAUSE THINGS AREN'T LOOKING
GREAT FOR HIM RIGHT NOW.
AND IF YOU'RE WONDERING WHICH
ONE I'M TALKING TO, THE ANSWER
IS "YES."
WE'LL SEE HOW THIS STORY
UNFOLDS, BUT AS OF TAPING ON
SATURDAY, ADAMS HAS PLED NOT
GUILTY, AND IS INSISTING HE
WON'T STEP DOWN.
WHICH, OKAY.
BUT THAT IS IN KEEPING WITH HIS
GENERAL PHILOSOPHY, WHICH HE'S
SUMMED UP LIKE THIS.
>> I AM THE PILOT FOLKS, AND YOU
ARE ALL PASSENGERS.
STOP PRAYING FOR ME TO CRASH THE
PLANE.
PRAY FOR ME TO LAND THE PLANE,
CAUSE THERE'S NO PARACHUTES ON
THIS PLANE, WE'RE ALL GOING DOWN
TOGETHER.
>> John: OKAY, OBVIOUSLY, PRAYER
DOESN'T LAND PLANES.
COMPETENCE DOES.
EVEN IN YOUR ANALOGY, YOU SOUND
LIKE A BAD PILOT.
THE BAD BOY OF AIR TRAVEL, IF
YOU WILL.
BUT WHILE ALL OF THIS IS VERY
FUNNY, IT'S WORTH REMEMBERING
ADAMS HAS DONE REAL DAMAGE TO
THIS CITY.
HE'S BEEN A TERRIBLE MAYOR.
EVEN BEFORE HIS INDICTMENT, HE
PROPOSED SLASHING FUNDING FOR
LIBRARIES AND PRESCHOOLS,
BLOCKED A LAW BANNING SOLITARY
CONFINEMENT, AND APPOINTED A
"RAT CZAR" WHO WAS --
UNFORGIVABLY -- NOT A RAT IN A
TOP HAT.
SO DESPITE WHAT ADAMS CLAIMS,
THE ANSWER IS NOT TO PRAY FOR
HIM TO SUCCEED.
IT'S TO INSIST HE LEAVES.
BECAUSE NEW YORK DESERVES
BETTER.
AND I FOR ONE CANNOT WAIT FOR
THE DAY WHEN WE GET TO HEAR THE
MOST ELECTRIFYING NEWS
BROADCASTER IN THE CITY TELL US:
MAYOR ERIC ADAMS HAS RESIGNED.
AND NOW, THIS.
>> Announcer: AND NOW,
A LITTLE MORE OF ERIC ADAMS IS
FAVORITE METAPHOR.
>> I'M THE PILOT AND ALL OF YOU
PASSENGERS.
YOU BETTER PRAY THIS PLANE
LANDS.
STOP PRAYING THAT IT CRASHES.
ON THE PILOT.
ANYONE'S WISHING FOR THE PILOT
TO FAIL, YOU BETTER REMEMBER
WHO'S FLYING IT.
I'M THE PILOT, COPILOT, I SAY
THIS OVER AND OVER AGAIN.
WE ARE GOING TO LAND THIS PLANE.
>> THE PEOPLE WAKE UP EVERY DAY
AND SAY HOW DO I GET THE PILOT
OF THIS PLANE TO CRASH?
THESE GUYS ARE ON THE PLANE.
I AM THE PILOT OF THIS PLANE OF
NEW YORK CITY AND WE ARE ALL
PASSENGERS.
IF I FAIL, THE PLANE GOES DOWN
AND THERE ARE NO PARACHUTES.
>> I SAY OVER AND OVER AGAIN,
UNITED WE LANDED THE PLANE.
>> THROUGHOUT THE TURBULENCE,
MANY OF YOU ON BOARD WITH US,
TURBULENCE MEANS THE PLANES
GOING TO SINK.
NO.
♪ ♪
>> John: MOVING ON.
OUR MAIN STORY TONIGHT CONCERNS
JUDGES -- THE ONLY GOVERNMENT
WORKERS WHOSE OFFICIAL DRESS
CODE IS "GOTH PONCHO."
JUDGES RULE ON MATTERS BIG AND
SMALL, BUT THEY'RE ALSO HUMAN
BEINGS, AS WE GOT REMINDED EARLY
IN THE PANDEMIC, WHEN SOMEONE
DIDN'T MUTE THEIR MICROPHONE
DURING THIS REMOTE SUPREME COURT
HEARING.
>> AND WHAT THE FCC HAS SAID IS
THAT WHEN THE SUBJECT MATTER OF
THE CALL RANGES TO THE TOPIC --
[TOILET FLUSHES]
THEN THE CALL IS TRANSFORMED.
>> John: IT'S TRUE, SOMEONE
FLUSHED A TOILET DURING ORAL
ARGUMENTS.
WHICH, TO BE FAIR, ISN'T THE
MOST EMBARRASSING ZOOM MISHAP
FROM BACK THEN -- ON A SCALE OF
"ZERO TO JEFFREY TOOBIN," IT'S
PROBABLY SOMEWHERE IN THE
MIDDLE.
AND I LOVE THAT LAWYER JUST KEPT
GOING.
WHO AMONG US DIDN'T SIT ON THE
TOILET DURING WORK HOURS BACK
THEN?
YOU REMEMBER WHEN I WAS INTHE
VOID?
I WAS ON A TOILET THE WHOLE
TIME.
I WAS DRESSED, I'M NOT A
PERVERT, BUT I WAS ON A TOILET.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN "THAT'S EVEN
MORE CONFUSING?"
DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT.
SHUT UP.
THIS PAST TERM WAS EVENTFUL FOR
THE SUPREME COURT, TO PUT IT
MILDLY.
THEY ISSUED RULINGS ON
EVERYTHING FROM GUN RIGHTS TO
SOCIAL MEDIA CENSORSHIP, TO
GERRYMANDERING, AND ALSO, KIND
OF MADE THE PRESIDENT A KING,
HOLDING 6-3, IN TRUMP VS.
THE U.S., THAT "PRESIDENTS ARE
COMPLETELY IMMUNE FROM
PROSECUTION FOR THINGS THEY DID
THROUGH CORE CONSTITUTIONAL
POWERS OF THE PRESIDENCY."
ADDING, THEY'RE AT LEAST
"PRESUMED TO BE IMMUNE -- AND
POTENTIALLY ARE ALWAYS IMMUNE --
FOR ALL OFFICIAL ACTS OF THEIR
PRESIDENCY," BUT LEAVING IT OPEN
TO INTERPRETATION AS TO WHAT
CONSTITUTES A CORE POWER AND AN
OFFICIAL ACT.
WHICH ISN'T IDEAL!
BECAUSE THERE ARE PRETTY OBVIOUS
REASONS WHY YOU'D WANT TO BE
MORE PRECISE THERE, AS SONIA
SOTOMAYOR TRIED POINTING OUT TO
TRUMP'S LAWYER.
>> IF THE PRESIDENT DECIDES THAT
HIS RIVAL IS A CORRUPT PERSON
AND HE ORDERS THE MILITARY OR
ORDERS SOMEONE TO ASSASSINATE
HIM, IS THAT WITHIN HIS OFFICIAL
ACTS THAT -- FOR WHICH HE CAN
GET IMMUNITY?
>> IT WOULD DEPEND ON THE
HYPOTHETICAL.
WE CAN SEE THAT COULD WELL BE AN
OFFICIAL ACT.
>> John: HOLY SHIT!
THAT IS TRUMP'S ATTORNEY ARGUING
THE PRESIDENT COULD BE SHIELDED
FROM PROSECUTION FOR
ASSASSINATING A POLITICAL RIVAL.
THAT'S TERRIFYING.
HONESTLY, THIS IS THE ORAL
ARGUMENT THAT SHOULD'VE FEATURED
BATHROOM NOISES, AS IT SEEMS
THEY JUST FLUSHED THE RULE OF
LAW DOWN THE FUCKING TOILET.
BUT EXTREMITY SEEMS TO BE THE
WHICH HAS BEEN AGGRESSIVE IN
APPLYING HARD-LINE CONSERVATIVE
VIEWS TO REVERSE ESTABLISHED
LAW.
IN 2022, THEY OVERTURNED
ROE V. WADE.
LAST YEAR, THEIR DECISION ON
AFFIRMATIVE ACTION REVERSED 45
YEARS OF LEGAL PRECEDENT.
AND THIS JUNE, THEY DISCARDED
THE "CHEVRON DOCTRINE," WHICH --
AS WE'LL GET INTO LATER -- IS A
CRITICAL, FOUR-DECADE-OLD
PRECEDENT CONCERNING HOW
REGULATORY AGENCIES WORK.
AND ALL THIS FULFILLED A PROMISE
TRUMP REPEATEDLY MADE ON THE
CAMPAIGN TRAIL EIGHT YEARS AGO,
TO TRY AND GET HESITANT
CONSERVATIVES TO SUPPORT HIM.
>> WE HAVE TO WIN AND ONE OF THE
BIGGEST REASONS WE HAVE TO DO
THIS FOR UNITED STATES SUPREME
COURT JUSTICES.
YOU GOTTA GO FOR TRUMP.
SUPREME COURT JUSTICES.
AND REMEMBER JUSTICES OF THE
SUPREME COURT.
REMEMBER THAT.
SUPREME COURT JUSTICES.
THAT'S ALL.
THAT'S ALL YOU HAVE TO THINK.
>> John: THAT TURNED OUT TO BE A
PRETTY SUCCESSFUL ARGUMENT.
IF TRUMP HAD PROMISED TO "THROW
PAPER TOWELS AT HURRICANE
VICTIMS," OR "MOLEST A FLAG" OR
"DECORATE THE WHITE HOUSE FOR
CHRISTMAS LIKE IT'S AN A24
HORROR MOVIE," IT MIGHT'VE BEEN
A LESS COMPELLING MESSAGE,
THOUGH TO BE FAIR, NO LESS TRUE.
BECAUSE TRUMP DELIVERED ON THAT
PROMISE -- AND NOT JUST AT THE
SUPREME COURT LEVEL.
HE'S RESHAPED THE JUDICIARY FROM
TOP TO BOTTOM, IN WAYS THAT ARE
ONLY STARTING TO BE FELT.
SO GIVEN THAT, TONIGHT, LET'S
LOOK AT THE FEDERAL COURTS --
WHAT TRUMP'S DONE TO THEM, AND
IF ELECTED AGAIN, WHAT HE COULD
DO NEXT.
AND LET'S START WITH HOW OUR
COURT SYSTEM IS ACTUALLY
STRUCTURED.
GENERALLY SPEAKING, LAWSUITS
INVOLVING FEDERAL LAW START IN
ONE OF 94 DISTRICT COURTS AROUND
THE COUNTRY -- THERE'S AT LEAST
ONE IN EVERY STATE, AND THIS IS
WHERE TRIALS TAKE PLACE.
IF A CASE IS APPEALED, IT GOES
UP TO THE COURTS OF APPEALS --
THERE ARE 13 OF THOSE, DIVIDING
THE COUNTRY INTO REGIONAL
CIRCUITS.
AND IF IT'S APPEALED FROM THERE,
THE SUPREME COURT COULD CHOOSE
TO HEAR IT.
THERE'S SOME LITTLE STUFF I'M
LEAVING OUT IN THERE, INCLUDING
AN EXTRA LAYER AT THE BOTTOM
CALLED, "JUDGE STEVE HARVEY GETS
A CRACK AT IT," BUT THAT'S
BASICALLY IT.
THE SUPREME COURT HEARS AROUND
100 CASES A YEAR, BUT THE
CIRCUIT COURTS BENEATH IT HANDLE
AROUND 40,000, WITH THE DISTRICT
COURTS BELOW THEM HANDLING OVER
300,000.
SO THE DECISIONS OF THOSE LOWER
COURTS ARE IN MOST CASES FINAL.
AND TRUMP WAS ABLE TO RESHAPE A
LOT OF THEM.
THERE ARE AROUND 900 ACTIVE
FEDERAL JUDGES IN TOTAL, AND AS
PRESIDENT, HE APPOINTED 234 OF
THEM, RIVALING THE NUMBERS OF
PRESIDENTS WHO HELD OFFICE FOR
TWICE AS LONG AS HE DID.
AND IRRITATINGLY, HE TENDS TO
FRAME THIS AS A STROKE OF
TREMENDOUS LUCK.
>> YOU KNOW, WHEN I GOT IN, WE
HAD OVER 100 FEDERAL JUDGES THAT
WEREN'T APPOINTED.
I DON'T KNOW WHY OBAMA LEFT
THAT.
IT WAS LIKE A BIG, BEAUTIFUL
PRESENT TO ALL OF US.
>> John: BUT WAS IT, THOUGH?
BECAUSE THE ACTUAL REASON HE GOT
THAT PRESENT WAS BECAUSE SENATE
REPUBLICANS, LED BY MITCH
MCCONNELL, STONEWALLED OBAMA'S
JUDICIAL NOMINEES FOR YEARS.
THOSE VACANCIES WEREN'T "GIFTED"
SO MUCH AS "STOLEN," WHICH IS
CLEARLY DIFFERENT.
OPRAH'S CAR GIVEAWAY WOULDN'T
HAVE SEEMED NEARLY AS FUN IF
SHE'D SPENT THE PREVIOUS NIGHT
CARJACKING EVERYONE IN CHICAGO.
AND MCCONNELL HIMSELF HAS
ADMITTED THAT ONCE HE HAD A
PRESIDENT TO HIS LIKING, FILLING
COURT SEATS WAS HIS TOP
PRIORITY.
>> IF I HAVE A CHOICE BETWEEN
TAKING UP A PARTICULAR BILL OR
TAKING UP A CIRCUIT COURT JUDGE,
I'LL TAKE UP THE CIRCUIT COURT
JUDGE BECAUSE I THINK IT MAKES
THE LONGEST-LASTING CONTRIBUTION
TO MAKING THIS THE KIND OF
COUNTRY IT OUGHT TO BE.
>> John: HE'S NOT LYING THERE.
DURING THE TRUMP YEARS, YOU
COULDN'T WHISPER THE WORDS
"COURT VACANCY" ANYWHERE IN
CONGRESS WITHOUT MCCONNELL
EXCITEDLY BURSTING THROUGH THE
WALL LIKE THE FUCKING
KOOL-AID MAN.
AND IT WASN'T JUST HIM --
RIGHT-WING GROUPS HAVE BEEN
FOCUSED ON GETTING JUDGES ONTO
THE BENCH FOR YEARS NOW.
WITH PERHAPS NO ONE PLAYING A
LARGER ROLE THAN THIS MAN:
LEONARD LEO.
HE'S BEEN CALLED "THE MAN BEHIND
THE CONSERVATIVE EFFORT TO MOVE
THE JUDICIARY TO THE RIGHT."
AND ONE PRIMARY WAY HE'S DONE
THIS HAS BEEN THROUGH HIS
LEADERSHIP AT THE FEDERALIST
SOCIETY -- AN ORGANIZATION HE
TURNED FROM A STUDENT CLUB INTO
AN INCUBATOR AND PIPELINE FOR
CONSERVATIVE LAWYERS TO BECOME
PUBLIC OFFICIALS AND JUDGES.
LEO'S ALSO A HUGELY SUCCESSFUL
FUNDRAISER, AND HAS BUILT A DARK
MONEY NETWORK TO FUNNEL CASH TO
CONSERVATIVE CAUSES, GROUPS AND
POLITICIANS.
AND HE'S USED A NUMBER OF
TACTICS, OVER THE YEARS, TO
CONCEAL THE MOVEMENT OF THAT
MONEY.
IN TERMS OF WHERE IT ENDS UP,
HE'S RECENTLY BEEN USING WHAT
ARE CALLED "DONOR ADVISED
FUNDS," WHICH MAKE IT
PRACTICALLY IMPOSSIBLE TO TRACE
WHERE THE MONEY GOES.
AND IN TERMS OF WHERE IT COMES
FROM -- WHICH FEELS IMPORTANT --
MANY ENTITIES HE'S BEEN LINKED
TO HAVEN'T BEEN REQUIRED TO
DISCLOSE THEIR DONORS.
AND AS YOU'LL SEE HERE, WHEN
ASKED ABOUT THAT, HE CAN GET
CAGEY FAST.
>> COULD YOU DESCRIBE TO US WHAT
THE PURPOSE OF THE BH FUND IS?
>> UM...
BH FUND IS A CHARITABLE
ORGANIZATION, YOU CAN LOOK IT
UP, I'M SURE ITS STATEMENT OF
PURPOSE IS LISTED.
>> WE DID.
AND ITS TAX DOCUMENT SAYS ITS
MISSION IS TO PROMOTE THE RULE
OF LAW AND LIMITED
CONSTITUTIONAL GOVERNMENT, AND
IT RECEIVED $24 MILLION FROM AN
ANONYMOUS DONOR IN 2017.
>> I HAVE A VERY SIMPLE RULE,
WHICH IS I'M ENGAGED IN THE
BATTLE OF IDEAS AND I CARE VERY
DEEPLY ABOUT OUR CONSTITUTION
AND THE ROLE OF COURTS IN OUR
SOCIETY AND I DON'T WASTE MY
TIME ON STORIES THAT INVOLVE
MONEY IN POLITICS BECAUSE WHAT I
CARE ABOUT IS IDEAS.
>> John: OH, COME ON.
I KNOW THIS IS SO OBVIOUS IT
BARELY NEEDS TO BE SAID, BUT
WHERE THINGS COME FROM DOES
MATTER, FOR THE SAME REASON THAT
LUNCHABLES CAN'T JUST LIST ITS
INGREDIENTS AS "MIND YOUR
FUCKING BUSINESS."
BUT EVEN IF IT CAN BE HARD TO
SAY WHO ALL OF LEO'S BACKERS
ARE, IT'S CLEAR WHAT BOTH HE AND
THEY WANT -- JUDGES ON THE BENCH
WHO ARE AGAINST REGULATION, AND
DEEPLY SOCIALLY CONSERVATIVE.
ALTHOUGH LEO WILL SOMETIMES TRY
TO PUT A MORE MODERATE FACE ON
THAT.
IN THE EARLY DAYS OF TRUMP'S
TERM, LEO HELPED SUPPLY HIM WITH
25 NAMES OF POTENTIAL SUPREME
COURT NOMINEES.
AND WATCH HIM SHRUG OFF
QUESTIONS ABOUT WHETHER ANY OF
THOSE NAMES MIGHT ONE DAY IMPACT
THE RIGHT TO AN ABORTION.
>> IS THE FEAR ON THE LEFT
JUSTIFIED THAT THIS MEANS THAT
ROE V. WADE IS IN JEOPARDY IF
ONE OF THE 25 GETS THROUGH THE
PROCESS?
>> THE LEFT HAS BEEN USING THE
ROE V. WADE SCARE TACTIC SINCE
1982 WHEN SANDRA O'CONNOR WAS
NOMINATED.
AND OVER 30 YEARS LATER,
NOTHING'S HAPPENED TO
ROE V. WADE.
SO, I THINK THE ABORTION
ISSUE IS REALLY VERY MUCH A
SCARE TACTIC.
>> John: AS I THINK WE ALL KNOW,
IT PLAYED OUT A BIT DIFFERENTLY.
SHORTLY AFTERWARD, TRUMP
NOMINATED KAVANAUGH FROM LEO'S
LIST -- AND HE, ALONG WITH
GORSUCH AND BARRETT, TWO OTHER
PICKS LEO RECOMMENDED -- WOUND
UP OVERTURNING ROE!
SO CLEARLY, IT WASN'T JUST A
SCARE TACTIC AT ALL.
IT'S HONESTLY HARD TO IMAGINE
HOW THAT CLIP COULD'VE AGED
WORSE, OTHER THAN IF HE'D
CONTINUED, "NO ONE NEEDS TO
PREPARE FOR ANY SORT OF NOVEL
CORONAVIRUS IN THE FUTURE, AND
DON'T WORRY ABOUT ARMIE HAMMER'S
CAREER, THAT THING'S GOING TO
KEEP GOING GREAT!"
THE POINT IS, LEO'S HAD A HUGE
AMOUNT OF SUCCESS IN PLANTING
HARD-RIGHT JUDGES THROUGHOUT THE
FEDERAL COURT SYSTEM.
AND THAT'S ENABLED CONSERVATIVE
GROUPS -- SOME OF WHICH HE FUNDS
-- TO EFFECTIVELY GO
"JUDGE-SHOPPING."
WHAT THAT MEANS IS, THEY'RE ABLE
TO WRITE A LAWSUIT DESIGNED TO
ACHIEVE A SPECIFIC POLICY END,
BRING IT BEFORE A DISTRICT COURT
JUDGE WHO CAME UP THROUGH THE
FEDERALIST SOCIETY, APPEAL IT UP
THROUGH CIRCUIT COURTS
INCREASINGLY STOCKED WITH
FEDERALIST SOCIETY ALUMNI, AND
MAYBE EVEN GET IT IN FRONT OF
THE SUPREME COURT, A FULL THIRD
OF WHOSE MEMBERS CAME OFF A LIST
FROM THE FEDERALIST SOCIETY'S
OWN LEONARD FUCKING LEO.
HE'S PUTTING OUT NEW
CONSERVATIVE JUDGES THE WAY
APPLE PUTS OUT TV SHOWS:
CONSTANTLY, AND SILENTLY.
AND WHILE TESTING THE LAW
THROUGH THE COURTS IS SOMETHING
BOTH LIBERAL AND CONSERVATIVE
GROUPS HAVE LONG USED AS A
TACTIC, IT'S NOW MUCH EASIER FOR
CONSERVATIVES TO DO IT -- EVEN
WITH INCREDIBLY WEAK CASES.
TAKE LAST YEAR'S FIGHT OVER
MIFEPRISTONE, A DRUG USED IN
MOST ABORTIONS.
THE LAWSUIT THAT PRECIPITATED IT
WAS CLEARLY CRAFTED TO RESTRICT
ABORTION ACCESS.
IT BEGAN WITH ACTIVISTS CREATING
A BRAND-NEW GROUP CALLED THE
ALLIANCE FOR HIPPOCRATIC
MEDICINE, WHICH THEY
INCORPORATED IN AMARILLO TEXAS,
JUST MONTHS BEFORE IT FILED THE
LAWSUIT.
AND THEY CHOSE AMARILLO FOR A
VERY SPECIFIC REASON.
>> BY FILING ITS LAWSUIT IN
AMARILLO, THE ALLIANCE DEFENDING
FREEDOM WAS ALMOST GUARANTEED TO
DRAW JUDGE MATTHEW KACSMARYK, A
TRUMP APPOINTEE WHO WORKED IN
THE CONSERVATIVE CHRISTIAN LEGAL
MOVEMENT.
>> John: RIGHT, BY FILING IN
AMARILLO, THEY KNEW THEIR CASE
WAS LIKELY TO GET ASSIGNED TO
KACSMARYK, SEEN HERE SHORTLY
AFTER ASKING HIS BARBER FOR THE
"WET MARINE."
THAT'S THE REASON THEY, AND SO
MANY CONSERVATIVE GROUPS, ARE
GOING TO AMARILLO -- IT'S NOT
FOR THE HISTORIC TOUR OF ROUTE
66, OR THE CANYON HORSEBACK
RIDE, OR EVEN THE HUGE PAIR OF
LEGS, WHICH ARE APPARENTLY
NUMBER 30 ON TRIPADVISOR'S LIST
OF THINGS TO DO IN AMARILLO,
EVEN THOUGH I'VE NEVER SEEN A
MORE OBVIOUS NUMBER ONE IN MY
ENTIRE LIFE.
THEY HAVE ABSOLUTELY GLOWING
REVIEWS, SUCH AS "IT'S A HUGE
PAIR OF LEGS STANDING IN A
PASTURE NEXT TO THE ROAD," "WHAT
A UNIQUE STATUE!!!
TALL LEGS!!!
OUT IN A FIELD!!!," AND "I
FIGURED WHILE HERE WHY NOT GO
FIND THEM.
THEY'RE INTERESTING AND BIG."
AND AMEN TO THAT, BROTHER --
THEY SURE ARE.
KACSMARYK IS INCREDIBLY
CONSERVATIVE.
HE'S SAID BEING TRANSGENDER IS A
"DELUSION," HAS ARGUED AGAINST
CONTRACEPTION AND SAME-SEX
MARRIAGE, AND CRITICIZED THE
LEGAL FOUNDATIONS OF
ROE V. WADE.
SO HE WAS ALWAYS LIKELY TO BE
INCREDIBLY SYMPATHETIC TO THE
PLAINTIFFS IN THE MIFEPRISTONE
CASE -- WHICH WAS LUCKY FOR
THEM, BECAUSE THEIR ARGUMENTS
WERE LAUGHABLY WEAK.
BASICALLY, SOME OF THE
PLAINTIFFS WERE PRO-LIFE DOCTORS
WHO ARGUED THE FDA'S APPROVAL OF
MIFEPRISTONE -- WHICH HAS BEEN
USED SAFELY FOR OVER 20 YEARS --
SHOULD BE WITHDRAWN, IN PART,
BECAUSE IT COULD HARM "THE
DOCTORS THEMSELVES."
THEY ARGUED THAT TREATING
PATIENTS WHO'D SUFFERED ADVERSE
HEALTH EFFECTS FROM THE DRUG --
WHICH, AGAIN, RARELY HAPPENS --
COULD CAUSE THEM HARDSHIP AND
SUBJECT THEM TO ENORMOUS STRESS
AND PRESSURE.
THOUGH, A FEW THINGS ABOUT THAT:
FIRST, NONE OF THOSE DOCTORS
WERE REQUIRED TO PRESCRIBE THE
DRUGS OR REGULARLY TREAT
ABORTION PATIENTS THEY COULDN'T
IDENTIFY A SINGLE CASE WHERE ANY
OF THEM HAD BEEN FORCED TO
PROVIDE SUCH CARE.
AND THERE'S ALREADY A FEDERAL
LAW THAT PROTECTS THEM FROM
HAVING TO DO SO.
BASICALLY, THEIR ARGUMENT DIDN'T
HAVE A LEG TO STAND ON -- WHICH
IS IRONIC, CONSIDERING AMARILLO
HAS TWO OF THEM THAT ARE JUST
HANGING AROUND FOR SOME REASON.
BUT KACSYMARYK SIDED WITH THE
PLAINTIFFS ANYWAY -- STRIKING
DOWN THE FDA'S APPROVAL OF
MIFEPRISTONE.
THE GOVERNMENT APPEALED HIS
RULING, BUT IT WAS THEN UPHELD
BY THE NOTORIOUSLY CONSERVATIVE
FIFTH CIRCUIT COURT OF APPEALS,
WHERE A THIRD OF THE JUDGES ON
WHICH WERE TRUMP APPOINTEES.
NOW, THE GOOD NEWS HERE IS, THE
SUPREME COURT ULTIMATELY
REVERSED THE RULING, SAYING THE
PLAINTIFFS LACKED STANDING TO
SUE, BECAUSE THEY HADN'T
CONVINCINGLY PROVEN THAT THEY
WERE BEING HARMED.
BECAUSE THEY FUCKING WEREN'T.
THE BAD NEWS IS, THIS WAS BY NO
MEANS A FULL-THROATED REJECTION,
AS IN KAVANAUGH'S DRAFTING OF
THE OPINION, HE EXPLICITLY LEFT
THE DOOR OPEN TO TRY AGAIN IN
THE FUTURE, SAYING THAT, "IT IS
NOT CLEAR THAT NO ONE ELSE WOULD
HAVE STANDING TO CHALLENGE THE
FDA'S RELAXED REGULATION OF
MIFEPRISTONE" -- A HINT SO
BROAD, IT MIGHT AS WELL HAVE HAD
A WINKING EMOJI AT THE END OF
IT.
THE POINT IS, THE COURTS ARE NOW
INCREDIBLY AMENABLE TO LAWSUITS
THAT CONSERVATIVES BRING.
AND WHILE THE MIFEPRISTONE AND
TRUMP IMMUNITY RULINGS HAVE BEEN
PRETTY WIDELY DISCUSSED, ONE OF
THE BIGGEST CONSERVATIVE
VICTORIES THIS YEAR HAS ACTUALLY
FLOWN UNDER THE RADAR A BIT --
EVEN THOUGH, FOR MOST OF LEONARD
LEO'S BIG CORPORATE BACKERS,
IT'S PROBABLY THE MOST IMPORTANT
REASON TO SUPPORT HIM.
AND IT CONCERNS REGULATION.
COMPANIES FAMOUSLY HATE
REGULATION, AN ATTITUDE SHARED
BY CERTAIN MEMBERS OF THE
SUPREME COURT, ESPECIALLY NEIL
GORSUCH -- WHO ALWAYS LOOKS LIKE
THE MAN IN EVERY CIALIS
COMMERCIAL.
GORSUCH RELEASED A BOOK THIS
YEAR CALLED "OVERRULED: THE
HUMAN TOLL OF TOO MUCH LAW,"
ABOUT HOW -- IN HIS VIEW --
REGULATORY AGENCIES ARE OUT OF
CONTROL AND BASICALLY MAKING UP
NEW LAWS LEFT AND RIGHT.
FOR YEARS NOW, HE'S DELIVERED A
SPIEL ABOUT HOW FEDERAL AGENCIES
-- WHICH FALL UNDER THE
EXECUTIVE BRANCH -- HAVE USURPED
THE POWER THAT RIGHTLY BELONGS
TO THE LEGISLATIVE ONE.
IT'S AN ARGUMENT HE DELIVERS
WITH HIS TRADEMARK ELECTRIC
PERSONALITY, LIKE THIS.
>> THE EXECUTIVE BRANCH HAS MADE
UP SO MANY NEW CRIMINAL LAWS
THAT PEOPLE HAVE STOPPED
COUNTING, AT OVER 300,000.
IF YOUR KETCHUP IS TOO RUNNY,
YOU GET IN TROUBLE FOR THAT,
BECAUSE A FEDERAL AGENCY SAID
SO.
I'M NOT MAKING IT UP.
WHAT IF YOU SELL MATTRESSES, AND
YOU TEAR OFF THAT TAG?
YOU'RE PROBABLY A FEDERAL
CRIMINAL.
AND IF YOU IMPORT LOBSTER IN A
PLASTIC BAG INSTEAD OF A
CARDBOARD BOX?
THAT'S A PROBLEM, BECAUSE A
BUREAUCRAT SAYS SO.
AND WHAT -- YOU KNOW WOODSY THE
OWL?
SOME OF YOU, WOODSY THE OWL?
DON'T GIVE A HOOT, DON'T
POLLUTE?
REMEMBER HIM?
SOME OF YOU REMEMBER HIM.
WELL, IF YOU MISUSE HIS
LIKENESS, YOU MIGHT BE A FEDERAL
FELON.
OKAY.
THAT'S WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU MIX
UP THE EXECUTIVE AND THE
LEGISLATIVE POWER.
>> John: OKAY, I KNOW THIS IS
BESIDE THE POINT, BUT THAT WAS
SOME DEAFENING SILENCE AFTER HE
ASKED IF ANYONE REMEMBERS WOODSY
THE OWL.
WHICH MAKES SENSE.
HE'S NOT EXACTLY A TOP TIER OWL
ANYMORE.
YOUR CURRENT A-LISTERS ARE
PROBABLY "OWL" FROM WINNIE THE
POOH, HEDWIG FROM HARRY POTTER,
THE DUOLINGO MASCOT AND, OF
COURSE, THIS SOGGY LITTLE GUY
WHO WENT VIRAL FOR LOOKING LIKE
HE'S GOING THROUGH HIS THIRD
DIVORCE.
BUT WHILE I'M SURE GORSUCH
WORKED HARD TO CHERRY PICK THOSE
REGULATIONS TO DUNK ON, HE'S
ACTUALLY MISCHARACTERIZING A LOT
OF THOSE RULES, IN WAYS THAT
FEEL PRETTY REVEALING!
FOR INSTANCE: A FEW OF THE
THINGS HE JUST CITED AS EVIDENCE
OF AN "OUT OF CONTROL" EXECUTIVE
BRANCH THERE ACTUALLY CAME FROM
THE LEGISLATIVE ONE.
THE WOODSY THE OWL THING WAS
THIS LAW PASSED BY CONGRESS.
AS FOR HIS EXAMPLE ABOUT
LOBSTERS, THAT'S HIM
SHORTHANDING A CASE INVOLVING
THE LACEY ACT, WHICH WAS -- AS
ITS NAME MIGHT SUGGEST -- ALSO
AN ACT OF CONGRESS.
AS FOR THE OTHERS, THOSE WERE
ALL CASES WHERE CONGRESS VERY
CLEARLY WANTED SPECIFIC THINGS
TO BE REGULATED.
WHEN IT COMES TO KETCHUP
LABELING, CONGRESS PASSED THIS
LAW DIRECTING THE FDA TO PREVENT
MISLABELING OF FOODS -- WHICH
THE AGENCY THEN DID -- ONLY
AFTER EXTENSIVE REVIEW AND
PUBLIC COMMENT PERIODS.
ALSO, THESE KINDS OF REGULATIONS
DON'T GENERALLY GET ENFORCED
UNLESS THE VIOLATIONS ARE
EGREGIOUS.
IN ONE RECENT TEN-YEAR PERIOD,
THE FDA ONLY MANAGED TO OBTAIN
TWO COURT INJUNCTIONS AGAINST
FOOD PRODUCTS ON ACCOUNT OF
MISLEADING LABELING.
SO IT'S NOT LIKE PRISONS ARE
FILLED WITH PEOPLE WHO SOLD
RUNNY KETCHUP.
IF THEY WERE, YOU'D KNOW ABOUT
IT -- PROBABLY BECAUSE WE
WOULD'VE ALREADY DONE A STORY
CALLED "KETCHUP INCARCERATION"
THAT'D BE 26 MINUTES LONG,
FEATURING VIDEOS OF TWO SEPARATE
PEOPLE CRYING, AND ENDING WITH
STEVE BUSCEMI DRESSED LIKE A
GIANT TOMATO FOR REASONS THAT
WOULD MAKE SENSE IN CONTEXT.
AND FINALLY, WHEN IT COMES TO
GORSUCH MAKING FUN OF MATTRESS
TAGS, JUST SO YOU KNOW: CONGRESS
PASSED THIS LAW.
AND I KNOW THERE'S A CERTAIN
HACK-COMEDY APPEAL TO GOING
"WHAT'S THE DEAL WITH MATTRESS
TAGS?"
AFTER ALL, WHY WOULD YOU NEED A
TAG SAYING WHO MADE A MATTRESS
AND WHEN -- WHEN'S THAT
INFORMATION EVER REALLY GOING TO
BE USEFUL TO YOU, RIGHT?
>> A FOAM CRIB MATTRESS BY STORK
CRAFT HAS BEEN RECALLED FOR
FAILING TO MEET FEDERAL
STANDARDS FOR FLAMMABILITY.
AFFECTED MATTRESSES WERE MADE
BETWEEN AUGUST 2014 AND JANUARY
2015, AND CONSUMERS SHOULD
STOP USING THE MATTRESS AND
CONTACT STORK CRAFT FOR A FREE
BARRIER COVER.
>> John: OH, YEAH, THAT MAKES A
LOT MORE SENSE NOW.
AMONG OTHER THINGS, THOSE
MATTRESS TAGS MIGHT HELP YOU
FIGURE OUT IF YOUR MATTRESS HAS
BEEN RECALLED.
SO, I GUESS THE ANSWER TO
GORSUCH'S QUESTION "WHY IS THE
GOVERNMENT ISSUING RULES ABOUT
MATTRESS TAGS," IS "SO A BABY'S
CRIB DOESN'T TURN INTO A
MINIATURE WICKER MAN, YOU
FUCKING IDIOT!"
AND LOOK, I'VE GOT ISSUES WITH
PLENTY OF REGULATIONS.
BUT IT'S DISINGENUOUS TO SUGGEST
THEY'RE ALL BEING ISSUED
ARBITRARILY AT RANDOM, WHEN ON
THE WHOLE, THEY'RE BEING
CAREFULLY CRAFTED BY CAREER
EXPERTS TO KEEP US SAFE.
AND THAT WORK IS NOW GOING TO BE
SIGNIFICANTLY HARDER DUE TO THE
CASE I MENTIONED AT THE START OF
THIS STORY -- THE ONE
OVERTURNING WHAT'S KNOWN AS
"CHEVRON DEFERENCE."
WE DISCUSSED CHEVRON A BIT IN
OUR FIRST SHOW OF THIS YEAR, BUT
IT'S A LONGSTANDING LEGAL
DOCTRINE, ARISING FROM THIS 1984
SUPREME COURT RULING.
VERY BASICALLY: CHEVRON
ENABLES CONGRESS TO TELL A
JUDGE GIVE LEEWAY TO AGENCIES.
IT LETS A CONGRESS WRITES A LAW
SAYING I WANT MERCURY OUT OF
DRINKING WATER.
THE EVA WOULD DECIDE HOW TO DO
THAT AND THEN THE DECISIONS
WOULD BE HARD TO OVERTURN.
CHEVRON'S ONE OF THE MOST CITED
PRESIDENTS IN AMERICAN LAW.
IT'S MENTIONED IN MORE THAN
18,000 FEDERAL COURT DECISIONS
AND WAS THE DECIDING FACTOR IN
APPROXIMATELY 70 SUPREME COURT
DECISIONS.
IT'S ESSENTIALLY, ONE OF THE
FOUNDATIONS CURRENT AMERICAN LAW
HAS BEEN BUILT ON.
GETTING RID OF CHEVRON ISN'T
JUST REMOVING THE BOTTOM JENGA
BLOCK, IT'S REMOVING THE ENTIRE
TABLE UNDERNEATH IT.
AND COMPANIES HAVE
UNSURPRISINGLY LONG WANTED
CHEVRON GONE.
AND IN JUNE, THEY GOT THEIR
WISH, THANKS TO A RULING IN A
COUPLE OF CASES THAT WERE
CONSOLIDATED INTO ONE CALLED
"LOPER BRIGHT V.
RAIMONDO."
AND FRUSTRATINGLY, LIKE THE
MIFEPRISTONE CASE, IT'S BUILT ON
QUITE A BIT OF BULLSHIT.
ON ITS FACE, IT INVOLVES A GROUP
OF FISHERMEN, TRYING TO OVERTURN
A REGULATION REQUIRING THEM TO
PAY FOR FEDERAL MONITORS TO
PREVENT OVERFISHING.
THEY COMPLAINED IT COULD HAVE
MADE IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR THEM TO
MAKE A LIVING -- AND I SAY
"COULD HAVE" BECAUSE THE
REGULATION WAS NOT BEING
ENFORCED, AND EVEN IF IT HAD,
THE FISHERMEN DIDN'T IDENTIFY A
SINGLE FISHING TRIP FOR WHICH
THEY WOULD'VE BEEN REQUIRED TO
PAY FOR MONITORING SERVICES
UNDER THAT RULE.
NEVERTHELESS THE FISHERMEN WERE
REPRESENTED BY THESE TWO
CONSERVATIVE GROUPS, ONE OF
WHICH -- THIS ONE -- IS BACKED
BY ENTITIES LINKED TO, YOU'LL
NEVER GUESS IT: LEONARD FUCKING
LEO.
AT THIS POINT, FINDING OUT
LEONARD LEO HAD A ROLE IN A
MAJOR CONSERVATIVE COURT CASE OF
FINDING OUT A FRENCH RELIC LIST
PUPPET HAS A HAND UP ITS ASS.
AND IT'S TELLING THAT SOME MAJOR
INDUSTRIES SUDDENLY SEEMED VERY
INTERESTED IN THE OUTCOME OF
THIS OBSCURE FISHING CASE, WITH
DOZENS WRITING AMICUS BRIEFS
INCLUDING THE US CHAMBER OF
COMMERCE, THE NORTH AMERICAN
MEAT INSTITUTE, AND A TRADE
ORGANIZATION REPRESENTING
E-CIGARETTE COMPANIES.
AND UNLESS FISH ARE VAPING NOW,
I DON'T REALLY SEE WHY THAT
GROUP SHOULD BE INVOLVED,
ALTHOUGH IF THEY ARE, THAT'S
ALSO COOL AS HELL.
LOOK AT THAT.
THAT'S FUCKING SICK.
I DON'T MEAN TO BE PRO-TOBACCO,
BUT THAT'S PURE SEX APPEAL.
AND THOSE INTERESTS GOT THEIR
WAY.
BECAUSE THE SUPREME COURT RULED
6-3 TO OVERTURN "CHEVRON
DEFERENCE" ENTIRELY -- MAKING IT
MUCH EASIER FOR COMPANIES TO
CHALLENGE A REGULATORY AGENCY'S
DECISION IN THE FUTURE.
AND WHEN YOU PUT THAT IN TANDEM
WITH ALL THESE OTHER RECENT
RULINGS, THE POWER OF REGULATORY
AGENCIES HAS NOW BEEN SHARPLY
LIMITED.
AND CONSERVATIVES,
UNDERSTANDABLY ARE VERY, VERY
HAPPY ABOUT THIS.
A
HERE'S JIM JORDAN, EXPLAINING
WHY.
>> THE FUNDAMENTAL QUESTION IS
WHO DECIDES.
THE, QUOTE, "EXPERTS," THE
TECHNOCRACY AS MR. BISHOPS
DESCRIBED, OR THE ELECTED
OFFICIALS.
I MAY NOT KNOW -- WE MAY NOT
KNOW HOW MANY PARTS PER BILLION
IS NECESSARY.
WE MAY NOT KNOW THAT.
BUT I DO KNOW ONE THING.
REGULATIONS AND RULES THAT
IMPACT THE ECONOMY TO THE TUNE
OF MILLIONS AND MILLIONS OF
DOLLARS, AND IMPACT THE 800,000
FOLKS I GET TO REPRESENT, THAT'S
IMPORTANT.
WE HAVE DEFERRED TO THE, QUOTE,
"EXPERTS."
EXPERTS WHO THINK THEY CAN RUN
OUR LIVES AND NEVER BE HELD
ACCOUNTABLE.
>> John: LOOK, I'LL GIVE HIM
THIS: WHEN JIM JORDAN SAYS "I
MAY NOT KNOW HOW MANY PARTS PER
BILLION IS NECESSARY," HE IS
ABSOLUTELY RIGHT.
AFTER ALL, HE'S A MAN WHO PRIDES
HIMSELF ON NOT KNOWING THINGS,
WHETHER IT'S SCIENCE,
TECHNOLOGY, OR INDEED, THE
ALLEGED SEXUAL ABUSE HAPPENING
TO COLLEGE WRESTLERS ON A TEAM
HE COACHED.
JIM JORDAN HAS BUILT A PERSONAL
BRAND ON NOT KNOWING WHAT'S
GOING ON.
BUT THERE ARE A FEW PROBLEMS
WITH HIS REASONING THERE: FIRST,
CONGRESS CAN'T PASS SHIT RIGHT
NOW.
BUT EVEN IF IT WAS FUNCTIONAL,
YOU WOULDN'T NECESSARILY WANT IT
WRITING TECHNICAL RULES ON
EVERYTHING.
LEGISLATORS CAN BE GOOD AT MANY
THINGS -- DELIVERING SPEECHES,
RAISING CAMPAIGN MONEY, GETTING
UNCONTROLLABLY HORNY DURING
"BEETLEJUICE" THE MUSICAL,
ESCAPING TO MEXICO WHEN THEIR
CONSTITUENTS NEED THEM MOST --
BUT THEY DON'T POSSESS UNIVERSAL
EXPERTISE IN TECHNOLOGY,
MEDICINE, OR FOOD SAFETY.
SO EVERY PART OF A REGULATOR'S
JOB IS NOW GOING TO BE MUCH
HARDER.
AS ONE COMMENTATOR WROTE, LOPER
BRIGHT HAS OPENED THE DOOR SO
THAT "THE WORST JUDGES WILL
ISSUE NATIONWIDE INJUNCTIONS,
EFFECTIVELY ONE-MAN VETOES OF
ENTIRE AGENCIES IN REAL TIME
BASED ON PERSONAL OPINION."
WHICH IS JUST FULLY NOT HOW THIS
GOVERNMENT IS SUPPOSED TO WORK.
THERE'S A REASON THAT
SCHOOLHOUSE ROCK VIDEO DOESN'T
END WITH SOME RANDOM JUDGE IN
MISSISSIPPI SUDDENLY WIPING HIS
ASS WITH THAT BILL.
AND UNFORTUNATELY IT'S ALREADY
BEGUN.
ONE ANALYSIS FOUND THAT IN FACT,
LESS THAN A WEEK AFTER IT WAS
ISSUED, THREE JUDGES IN
DIFFERENT STATES PUBLISHED
DECISIONS ON THE SAME DAY CITING
LOPER BRIGHT AS THEY BLOCKED
IMPLEMENTATION OF A NEW RULE
THAT WOULD PROHIBIT
DISCRIMINATION IN HEALTH CARE
BASED ON GENDER IDENTITY.
AND AT THE SAME TIME, JUDGES ARE
MAKING IT CLEAR THEY'RE NOT MUCH
BETTER EQUIPPED THAN CONGRESS TO
ANSWER HIGHLY TECHNICAL ISSUES.
IN ONE DECISION THIS TERM NEIL
GORSUCH REPEATEDLY CONFUSED
NITROUS OXIDE, OFTEN KNOWN AS
LAUGHING GAS, WITH NITROGEN
OXIDES, THE CLASS OF COMPOUNDS
THAT HELP FORM SMOG.
THAT'S A MISTAKE YOU GET TO MAKE
AT DENTAL SCHOOL EXACTLY ONCE.
WHEN YOU TAKE ALL THIS TOGETHER,
YOU CAN UNDERSTAND WHY ONE OF
THE JUSTICES ON THE LOSING END
OF ALL THESE RECENT 6-3
DECISIONS HAS BEEN GOING AROUND
SAYING STUFF LIKE THIS.
>> THERE ARE DAYS THAT I'VE COME
TO MY OFFICE AFTER AN
ANNOUNCEMENT OF A CASE AND CLOSE
MY DOOR AND CRIED.
THERE HAVE BEEN THOSE DAYS, AND
THEY'RE LIKELY TO BE MORE.
>> John: WELL, THAT DOESN'T FEEL
GREAT.
YOU KNOW THINGS ARE BAD WHEN
SUPREME COURT JUSTICES ARE
CRYING ALONE IN THEIR OFFICE
INSTEAD OF WHERE THEY USUALLY
CRY: ON NATIONAL TV WHILE
GETTING CREDIBLY ACCUSED OF
SEXUAL ASSAULT.
SO WHAT CAN WE DO?
WELL, MEMBERS OF CONGRESS HAVE
INTRODUCED BILLS TO TRY AND UNDO
SOME OF THESE DECISIONS, BUT
GIVEN THAT REPUBLICANS CURRENTLY
CONTROL THE HOUSE, THOSE BILLS
HAVE GONE NOWHERE.
THOMAS AND ALITO, AND MANY
PREVENTING MORE HAPPENING IS BY
KEEPING TRUMP OUT OF THE
WHITE HOUSE AND REPUBLICANS OUT
OF CONGRESS IN NOVEMBER.
IN 2016, TRUMP'S INTENTIONS ARE
VERY CLEAR.
THE OLDEST JUSTICES ARE
THOMAS AND ALITO, AND MANY
BELIEVE ONE OR BOTH OF THEM
COULD STEP DOWN DUE TO AGE IN
THE NEXT FOUR YEARS --
POTENTIALLY GIVING TRUMP THE
CHANCE TO CEMENT THE COURT'S
CONSERVATIVE SUPERMAJORITY FOR A
GENERATION.
HE'S OPENLY PROMISING HIS BASE
AS MUCH.
>> I WILL ONCE AGAIN APPOINT
ROCK SOLID CONSERVATIVE JUDGES
IN THE MOLD OF JUSTICES
ANTONIN SCALIA, SAMUEL ALITO,
HE'S DONE A FANTASTIC JOB, AND
THE GREAT CLARENCE THOMAS, HE'S
BEEN FANTASTIC.
>> John: FIRST, NO HE
HASN'T BEEN FANTASTIC.
HE'S BEEN A FUCKING NIGHTMARE.
EAGLE-EYED VIEWERS WILL REMEMBER
THAT I NEARLY OBLITERATED MY
PERSONAL FINANCES TO ENCOURAGE
HIM TO RETIRE, WHICH HONESTLY
WOULD'VE BEEN WORTH IT.
BUT WOULD'VE ALSO PUT ME IN SUCH
A HOLE, I'D HAVE PROBABLY HAD TO
GO FULL "CANCEL CULTURE WARRIOR"
TO DIG MYSELF OUT OF IT.
I'D HAVE A 2-HOUR NETFLIX
STAND-UP SPECIAL CALLED "THEY
WON'T LET ME DO STAND-UP
ANYMORE" AND A STADIUM TOUR
CALLED "THEY WON'T LET ME TOUR
EITHER."
THE POINT IS, THAT IS A MAN WHO
KNOWS, THAT THAT'S THE PROMISE
THAT CAN GET HIM ELECTED, AND
HAVE PEOPLE WILLING TO IGNORE
LITERALLY EVERYTHING ELSE ABOUT
HIM.
LOOK, THE REMAKING OF AMERICA'S
JUDICIARY IS THE CULMINATION OF
A PLAN THAT'S BEEN GOING ON FOR
DECADES.
AND WHILE A LOT OF THE JUDGES
THAT'VE BEEN PUT IN PLACE AREN'T
GOING ANYWHERE FOR A WHILE, THAT
DOESN'T MEAN THE CHANGE HAS TO
BE PERMANENT.
AND SECURING THE WHITE HOUSE AND
CONGRESS IS OUR BEST SHOT AT
STARTING TO SLOWLY UNDO THAT
CHANGE.
AND I KNOW IT CAN FEEL EXTREMELY
DEPRESSING -- I MEAN, SAD-OWL
DEPRESSING -- TO LIVE IN A WORLD
WHERE RICH, ANONYMOUS INTERESTS
CAN INSTALL FRIENDLY JUDGES TO
HAND THEM WHATEVER RULINGS THEY
WANT, AND WHERE THE GOVERNMENT'S
ABILITY TO KEEP US SAFE IS
HAMSTRUNG BY SOME DORK'S B-MINUS
STANDUP ROUTINE.
BUT THAT SITUATION ONLY PERSISTS
IF WE LET IT.
IF WE CAN ELECT PEOPLE WHO VALUE
AN INDEPENDENT JUDICIARY AND THE
RULE OF LAW, THEN LEO AND HIS
BACKERS WON'T BE ABLE TO SO
EASILY BUY THE JUSTICE SYSTEM.
MEANING HE'LL PROBABLY NEED
SOMETHING ELSE TO SPEND ALL THAT
MONEY ON.
AND MAY I SUGGEST A TRIP TO THE
MOST SPECTACULAR LEGS IN TEXAS?
AND NOW, THIS.
I DON'T WANT TO OVERSELL THEM,
BUT I HEARD THEY'RE BOTH
INTERESTING AND BIG.
AND NOW, THIS.
>> Announcer: AND NOW,
PEOPLE ON TV LEARN THAT GEN Z
DON'T LIKE TO SHOW THEIR FEET.
>> YOU WANT TO KNOW THE BIGGEST
DIFFERENCE BETWEEN GEN Z AND THE
REST OF US?
GEN Z KIDS DON'T LIKE TO SHOW
THEIR FEET.
THEY LIKE THICK CHUNKY SNEAKERS,
CROCS WITH SOCKS.
>> THEY DON'T WANT PEOPLE TO SEE
THEIR FEET, SO THEY ARE WEARING
THOSE WITH SOCKS.
>> SOCKS WITH SANDALS, CROCS
WITH SOCKS.
THAT'S WHAT THE KIDS ARE
WEARING.
THEY ARE EMBARRASSED TO SHOW OFF
THEIR TOOTSIES AND OFFENDED BY
THE UGLY FEET OF OTHERS.
>> WE NEED TO GET BACK TO
SOMETHING YOU SAID AT THE TOP OF
THE BROADCAST.
A FRIEND WITH 11 TOES?
>> YEAH.
IN HIGH SCHOOL, A GUY ALWAYS
WORE SOCKS WITH SANDALS.
WE'RE LIKE, TAKE YOUR SOCKS OFF.
HE'S LIKE, OKAY, FINALLY HE TOOK
THEM OFF AND HE HAD 11 TOES.
THE LITTLE GUY RIGHT HERE, HE
HAD A LITTLE OFF SHOOT.
>> TRUE STORY.
>> THERE WAS A GUY IN
HIGH SCHOOL, HE HAD ONE MORE
THAN STAN THE MAN, HE HAD 12.
SIX ON EACH FOOT.
BUT IT'S ONE OF THOSE THINGS
WHERE YOU JUST OWN IT AFTER A
WHILE, WHATEVER.
>> I HAVE VERY LONG SKINNY FEET
AND I HAVE LONG TOES.
LIKE I CAN USE MY FEET LIKE
HANDS.
LIKE, I CAN PICK UP STUFF WITH
MY FEET.
I DIDN'T WEAR SANDALS FOR THE
LONGEST TIME BECAUSE ONE TIME IN
ELEMENTARY SCHOOL I HAD SOME
SANDALS AND MY FRIENDS ARE LIKE
WOW, YOU GOT MONKEY TOES.
CAN YOU HANG FROM TREES?
I'M LIKE, OKAY, THAT'S IT.
I WAS SO SELF-CONSCIOUS.
NOW, I DON'T GIVE A RIP.
>> HAVING SAID THAT THAT I'VE
SEEN A FAIR AMOUNT CORNS AND
BUNIONS AND OTHER THINGS IN
MY TIME.
>> HAMMER TOE.
>> YEAH, HAMMER TOE, THAT LITTLE
GUY HUGGING UP TO THE NEXT ONE.
>> THE PROCEDURE, THEY CHOOSE
CHISEL THAT BONE, MAN, YOU'RE
BACK TO NORMAL.
NEW MAN, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN,
OUT OF TIME YOU'RE MOVING ON
STRAIGHT AS AN ARROW.
STRAIGHT AS AN ARROW FOR YOU,
GOOD TO KNOW.
♪ ♪
>> John: THAT'S OUR SHOW.
THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR WATCHING.
WE WILL SEE YOU NEXT WEEK.
GOOD NIGHT!
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]
♪ ♪