♪ ♪
>> John: WELCOME, WELCOME,
WELCOME TO "LAST WEEK TONIGHT!"
I'M JOHN OLIVER, THANKS SO MUCH
FOR JOINING US.
WE'RE BACK, AND WE'VE MISSED A
LOT, FROM STEVE BANNON BEING
CHARGED WITH MONEY-LAUNDERING,
TO PAKISTAN SUFFERING MASSIVE
FLOODING, TO THE PRESIDENT OF
CHILE, SPEAKING ON THE DAY HIS
COUNTRY REJECTED A NEW
CONSTITUTION, WHILE BEING
UNDERMINED BY AN UNEXPECTED
GUEST.
>> THE ROLE THAT I WILL PLAY AS
PRESIDENT OF THE REPUBLIC IN OUR
GOVERNMENT, AND WHICH WE ARE
GOING TO COMMIT OURSELVES
TOGETHER WITH ALL OF YOU IS TO
DEFINE OURSELVES AS A COUNTRY,
TO ADVANCE JUSTICE AND EQUALITY,
AND TO ADVANCE GREATER
DEVELOPMENT AND GROWTH FOR ALL
OF US.
AND KNOW THAT THIS HISTORIC
MOMENT WILL SURELY REMAIN IN OUR
MEMORIES FOR A LONG TIME TO
COME.
THEY'RE WATCHING US FROM ALL
OVER THE WORLD.
>> John: OH, YEAH!
THEY SURE ARE!
JUST MAYBE NOT FOR THE EXACT
REASONS YOU WERE HOPING FOR.
QUICK TIP FOR ANY WORLD LEADERS:
IF YOU WANT PEOPLE TO FOCUS ON
WHAT YOU'RE SAYING, TRY NOT TO
SAY IT NEXT TO A BICYCLE-RIDING,
FUN-SIZED SUPERMAN HAVING THE
TIME OF HIS FUCKING LIFE.
BUT WE OBVIOUSLY NEED TO START
WITH THE UK, WHICH IS CLEARLY
STILL REELING FROM THE SHOCKING
DEATH OF A 96-YEAR-OLD WOMAN
FROM NATURAL CAUSES.
IT'S A BIG MOMENT, WHICH, FOR
SOME REASON, ABSOLUTELY EVERYONE
FELT THEY HAD TO WEIGH IN ON,
FROM CRAZY FROG, WHICH TWEETED
OUT "R.I.P. THE QUEEN, CANDLE
EMOJI" -- A TWEET THAT'S
IMPOSSIBLE TO READ WITHOUT
MENTALLY ADDING -- TO DOMINO'S
UK, WHICH POSTED "EVERYONE AT
DOMINO'S JOINS THE NATION AND
THE WORLD IN MOURNING THE DEATH
OF QUEEN ELIZABETH II.
OUR THOUGHTS AND CONDOLENCES ARE
WITH THE ROYAL FAMILY."
WHICH I GUESS IS NICE, ALTHOUGH
IF "THE WORLD IS MOURNING," THEY
SHOULD MAYBE TELL THE U.S.
DOMINO'S ACCOUNT, WHOSE MOST
RECENT TWEET, AS OF THIS TAPING,
IS "IF UR READING THIS IT MEANS
U NEED PIZZA.
LIKE TO CONFIRM."
GET YOUR FUCKING HOUSE IN ORDER,
U.S. DOMINO'S, A LADY IS DEAD!
BUT THE QUEEN'S DEATH IS NOT THE
ONLY TRAUMATIC EVENT BRITAIN'S
HAD TO DEAL WITH THIS WEEK.
BECAUSE ON TUESDAY, LIZ TRUSS --
BASICALLY, MARGARET THATCHER IF
SHE WERE HIGH ON GLUE -- BECAME
ITS NEW PRIME MINISTER.
YOU MAY REMEMBER, A FEW WEEKS
AGO, WHEN COVERING THE BATTLE TO
REPLACE BORIS JOHNSON, WE
INTRODUCED YOU TO HER MOST
ICONIC MOMENT:
>> IN DECEMBER, I'LL BE IN
BEIJING, OPENING UP NEW PORK
MARKETS!
[LAUGHTER]
>> John: EXCELLENT.
I GENUINELY DON'T THINK SHE
COULD HAVE GOTTEN A MORE TEPID
RESPONSE TO "I'LL BE OPENING UP
NEW PORK MARKETS" IF THAT
AUDIENCE WAS LITERALLY FULL OF
PIGS.
AND IF YOU THINK SHE LEARNED
ANYTHING AFTER THAT ABOUT THE
DANGER OF HOLDING FOR APPLAUSE
AFTER MAKING A LUDICROUS
STATEMENT, JUST WATCH THE SPEECH
SHE GAVE TO HER PARTY ON MONDAY,
WHERE SHE TRIED TO PAY TRIBUTE
TO HER PREDECESSOR.
>> BORIS, YOU GOT BREXIT DONE.
YOU CRUSHED JEREMY CORBYN.
YOU ROLLED OUT THE VACCINE, AND
YOU STOOD UP TO VLADIMIR PUTIN.
YOU ARE ADMIRED FROM KIEV TO
CARLISLE.
[LAUGHTER]
[APPLAUSE]
>> John: OKAY, A COUPLE OF
THINGS: FIRST, THE UK GOES ABOVE
CARLISLE.
SO THAT'S BASICALLY AN ADMISSION
THAT EVERYONE NORTH OF THIS
POINT FUCKING HATES BORIS.
AND SECOND, PRAISING BORIS
JOHNSON ISN'T HOW YOU GET AN
AUDIENCE TO LOVE YOU.
AS WE ALL KNOW, THE WAY TO DO
THAT IS TO HAVE A CHILEAN CHILD
SUPERMAN RIDE AROUND YOU.
THAT'S THE ONLY WAY TO DISTRACT
PEOPLE FROM THE STUPIDITY OF
WHAT YOU JUST SAID.
LIZ TRUSS IS NOW FACING A
MULTITUDE OF PROBLEMS, WITH THE
MOST PRESSING BEING THE FACT
THAT -- DUE TO FACTORS LIKE
COVID AND RUSSIA'S WAR IN
UKRAINE -- BRITISH HOUSEHOLDS
FACE AN EIGHTY PERCENT INCREASE
ON THEIR ENERGY BILLS STARTING
NEXT MONTH.
WHICH IS CLEARLY TERRIFYING --
AND SOMEHOW MADE EVEN GRIMMER BY
HOW ONE DAYTIME SHOW TRIED TO
DEAL WITH IT:
>> HOW ARE YOUR ENERGY BILLS?
ARE YOU A BIT WORRIED ABOUT IT
ALL?
>> MAJOR.
I'VE GOT ONE OF THESE PREPAYMENT
METERS AND IT'S ABSOLUTELY
MURDER.
>> OH GOD...
>> WELL, LET'S HOPE IT LANDS ON
ONE OF THOSE THEN.
>> WHATEVER, YOU'RE GOING TO WIN
SOME MONEY, SO DON'T WORRY, HERE
WE GO.
>> 1000 POUNDS OR ENERGY BILLS,
1000 POUNDS OR ENERGY BILLS.
IT IS GOING TO BE...
IT'S YOUR ENERGY BILL!
>> OH MY GOD.
THANK YOU!
>> WE ARE PAYING YOUR ENERGY
BILL FOR FOUR MONTHS.
>> OH FANTASTIC!
>> NO WORRIES.
>> John: WOW, THAT'S BLEAK.
FOR THOSE OF YOU WHO AREN'T
FAMILIAR WITH BRITISH TV, THAT'S
FROM A PROGRAM CALLED "ORWELLIAN
NIGHTMARE DOOM SPIRAL THIS
MORNING."
TRUSS HAS NOW PROPOSED LIMITING
ENERGY PRICES, WHICH COULD
REPORTEDLY COST THE GOVERNMENT
MORE THAN A HUNDRED BILLION
POUNDS.
AND MANY HAVE SUGGESTED THAT,
RATHER THAN PASSING THAT COST
ALONG TO TAXPAYERS, SOME OF IT
SHOULD BE RECOUPED THROUGH A NEW
SO-CALLED "WINDFALL TAX" ON OIL
AND GAS COMPANIES, WHO HAVE MADE
HUGE PROFITS DURING THE PRICE
SPIKE FOR DOING ABSOLUTELY
NOTHING.
BUT TRUSS HAS NO INTEREST IN
DOING THAT.
>> ONE THING I ABSOLUTELY DON'T
SUPPORT IS A WINDFALL TAX.
I THINK IT'S A LABOR IDEA.
IT'S ALL ABOUT BASHING BUSINESS,
AND IT SENDS THE WRONG MESSAGE
TO INTERNATIONAL INVESTORS AND
TO THE PUBLIC.
I DON'T THINK PROFIT IS A DIRTY
WORD AND THE FACT IT'S BECOME A
DIRTY WORD IN OUR SOCIETY IS A
MASSIVE PROBLEM BECAUSE THERE
ARE, YOU KNOW, IN THIS AUDIENCE
TODAY WE HAVE HUNDREDS OF PEOPLE
WHO RUN BUSINESSES AND MAKE A
PROFIT AND I THINK THAT'S A GOOD
THING.
>> John: WHAT ARE YOU TALKING
ABOUT?
I'M JUST GOING TO SAY IT -- AND
YOU MAY NOT LIKE IT, BUT IT
DOESN'T MAKE IT ANY LESS TRUE:
THE NICEST THING THE QUEEN OF
ENGLAND EVER DID FOR ANYONE WAS
DIE THE WEEK THAT WOMAN BECAME
PRIME MINISTER.
BECAUSE FOR AT LEAST A WEEK,
SHE'S NOT GOING TO BE GETTING
JUSTIFIABLY DESTROYED FOR
ANSWERS LIKE THAT.
LOOK, THINGS ARE PRETTY BLEAK IN
THE UK RIGHT NOW.
THIS GUY'S ABOUT TO BE ON ALL
THE MONEY, AND MORNING TV IS NOW
BASICALLY THE HUNGER GAMES, BUT
DON'T WORRY, BRITAIN -- YOUR
FUTURE IS NOW SECURELY IN THE
HANDS OF DOLLAR STORE BRITISH
LESLIE KNOPE.
EVERYTHING'S GOING TO BE FINE.
"AND NOW THIS."
>> Announcer: AND NOW, SEAN
HANNITY DOES THE OPPOSITE FOR AN
AD FOR WALMART.
>> FOUR YEARS AGAINST
PRESIDENT TRUMP AND WE THEY
SMELLY WALMART SHOPPERS THAT
SUPPORT HIM.
THEY ALSO HATE WE'VE COME THE
PEOPLE, WE SMELLY WALMART
SHOPPERS.
WE THE SMELLY WALMART SHOPPERS,
IRREDEEMABLE DEPLORABLE IS NO
BETTER THAT WE THE SMELLY
WALMART.
TRUMP VOTERS, SMELLY WALMART
PEOPLE.
WE JUST A BUNCH OF SMELLY
WALMART VOTERS BUT WHAT DO WE
KNOW?
WE ARE SMELLY WALMART SHOPPERS.
BY THE WAY, GUILTY, I GO TO
WALMART.
I LIKE TO CONFESS, I LIKE TO
SHOP AT WALMART.
SMELLY WALMART SHOPPER.
I LIKE TO SHOP AT WALMART TOO.
JOE BIDEN IS DOING EVERYTHING
RIGHT AND EVERYBODY ELSE IS A
BUNCH OF NAZIS AND FASCISTS AND
JERKS THAT SUCK.
WE SHOP AT WALMART.
TURN AROUND AND TELL EVERYBODY
SEAN HANNITY SAID THAT YOUR
IRREDEEMABLE DEPLORABLE IS THAT
SHOPS AT WALMART.
>> SEAN HANNITY SAYS YOU'RE A
SMELLY WALMART PEOPLE THAT ARE
DEPLORABLE'S THAT LOVE GOD.
THEY SAY THEY ARE PROUD OF IT,
SEAN!
♪ ♪
[APPLAUSE]
>> John: MOVING ON.
FOR OUR MAIN STORY TONIGHT,
WE'RE GOING TO DO SOMETHING A
LITTLE DIFFERENT, AND TALK ABOUT
ANOTHER TV SHOW.
SPECIFICALLY, "LAW & ORDER," THE
WILDLY POPULAR FRANCHISE THAT'S
BEEN ON TV FOR DECADES, TREATING
US TO INCREDIBLE DIALOGUE LIKE
THIS:
>> DO YOU THINK THAT THERE WAS A
REASON THAT THE KILLER SODOMIZED
YOUR HUSBAND WITH A BANANA?
>> John: NOW "THAT" IS ACTING.
EVEN IF I WASN'T LISTENING TO
THE WORDS COMING OUT OF MARISKA
HARGITAY'S MOUTH, I'D KNOW,
BASED ON HER DELIVERY ALONE,
THAT THE KILLER HAD SODOMIZED
THIS PERSON'S HUSBAND WITH A
BANANA, AND THAT SHE WAS TRYING
TO FIGURE OUT WHY.
NOW, IT TURNS OUT, THE VICTIM'S
WIFE ACTUALLY ANSWERED THAT
QUESTION.
AND THINK OF THE FUNNIEST
POSSIBLE RESPONSE.
YOU'RE WRONG, IT'S THIS.
>> DO YOU THINK THAT THERE WAS A
REASON THAT THE KILLER SODOMIZED
YOUR HUSBAND WITH A BANANA?
>> HE WAS ALLERGIC TO BANANAS.
>> John: EXCELLENT.
I LOVE THE IDEA OF A KILLER
ASKING, "BEFORE I MURDER AND
SODOMIZE YOU, I'VE GOT JUST ONE
QUESTION: DO YOU HAVE ANY
ALLERGIES I SHOULD BE AWARE OF?"
THAT EXCHANGE IS JUST ONE OF THE
REASONS WHY "LAW & ORDER" IS THE
KING OF COP SHOWS.
BETWEEN ALL ITS VARIOUS
SPINOFFS, THERE ARE OVER 1,200
EPISODES OF IT.
IT'S BEEN AROUND FOR SO LONG,
IT'S GENUINELY HARD TO THINK OF
AN ACTOR WHO HASN'T APPEARED ON
IT AT SOME POINT, BECAUSE IT'S
FEATURED EVERYONE FROM
CHEVY CHASE, TO
SAMUEL L. JACKSON, TO
PHILIP SEYMOUR HOFFMAN, TO
ANGELA LANSBURY APPEARING WITH
HER LAWYER, BRADLEY COOPER, TO
ADAM DRIVER, WHO'S ON SEASON 13
EPISODE 11 OF SVU, FOR
APPROXIMATELY THREE MINUTES AND
32 SECONDS OF SCREENTIME.
IF YOU'RE THE KIND OF PERSON WHO
COUNTS THAT SORT OF THING.
EVEN POLITICIANS HAVE BEEN ON
IT, LIKE RUDY GIULIANI,
MIKE BLOOMBERG, AND JOE BIDEN,
ALL OF WHOM GUEST-STARRED AS
THEMSELVES.
WHICH IS A LITTLE WEIRD.
ALTHOUGH IT'D CLEARLY BE WEIRDER
IF BIDEN APPEARED AS SOMEONE
ELSE, LIKE A TIMES SQUARE
NINJA TURTLE WHO STUMBLED ACROSS
A GRISLY MURDER VICTIM SUFFERING
FROM BANANAPHYLACTIC SHOCK.
"LAW & ORDER" IS ON ALL THE
TIME, AND FOR MANY, IT'S COMFORT
TV.
BUT IT, AND SHOWS LIKE IT, HAVE
A REAL IMPACT -- ONE STUDY FOUND
"VIEWERS OF CRIME DRAMAS ARE
MORE LIKELY TO BELIEVE THE
POLICE ARE SUCCESSFUL AT
LOWERING CRIME, USE FORCE ONLY
WHEN NECESSARY, AND THAT
MISCONDUCT DOES NOT TYPICALLY
LEAD TO FALSE CONFESSIONS."
WHICH WOULD BE GREAT IF IT WERE
TRUE, BUT IF YOU'RE WATCHING
THIS SHOW, YOU PROBABLY KNOW...
IT ISN'T.
AND "LAW & ORDER" IN PARTICULAR
HAS BECOME AN AMERICAN
INSTITUTION, WITH HUGE CULTURAL
INFLUENCE.
SOME HAVE ARGUED ITS FORMULA
SHAPED A GENERATION'S
UNDERSTANDING OF THE LEGAL
SYSTEM.
AND YOU'VE PROBABLY SEEN PEOPLE
USING IT AS A GO-TO REFERENCE
POINT, LIKE THIS:
>> I'M NOT AN ATTORNEY, I WATCH
"LAW & ORDER" FROM TIME TO TIME.
>> MY LEGAL EXPERIENCE IS
WATCHING "LAW & ORDER" AND "LAW
& ORDER: SVU."
>> I THINK THE AVERAGE VIEWER OF
"LAW & ORDER" PROBABLY KNOWS
THAT YOU'RE NOT SUPPOSED TO DO
THIS.
>> WELL, I WENT TO A GREAT LAW
SCHOOL, BUT MOST OF WHAT I DO ON
A DAY-TO-DAY BASIS IS BASED OFF
OF WHAT I LEARNED ON "LAW &
ORDER."
>> John: LOOK, I'M NOT SAYING
THERE'S NOTHING YOU CAN LEARN
FROM "LAW & ORDER."
I'VE LEARNED A TON FROM ICE-T'S
TWITTER FEED ALONE, WHERE HE
DROPS TRUTH BOMBS LIKE "A REAL
NUT...
FEELS LIKE EVERY BONE IN YOUR
BODY COMES OUT THE HEAD OF YOUR
DICK...
SAY NO MORE.
I'M DONE.
FALL ASLEEP IN 2 MINUTES."
LOOK, THE MAN IS A TRUTH TELLER.
IF YOU CAN'T HANDLE THE ICE,
STAY OUT OF THE FREEZER.
IT CAN BE GENUINELY ALARMING HOW
SERIOUSLY SOME PEOPLE TAKE THE
SHOW -- IN FACT, JUST LISTEN TO
WARREN LEIGHT, "LAW & ORDER:
SVU"'S FORMER LONGTIME
SHOWRUNNER, TALK ABOUT AN
UNEXPECTED GROUP OF VIEWERS HE
LEARNED ABOUT.
>> WE'VE ALSO FOUND OUT OVER
TIME, AND THIS IS A LITTLE
ANXIETY-PROVOKING FOR ME, THAT A
LOT OF COPS AREN'T TRAINED IN
HOW TO -- HOW TO DO THEIR JOB IN
CERTAIN CASES OF SEXUAL ASSAULT.
AND A LOT OF COPS GET A LOT OF
THEIR INFORMATION FROM WATCHING
"SVU", WHICH, A LOT OF POLICE
DEPARTMENTS DON'T HAVE THE TIME
OR THE MONEY TO-TO PUT PEOPLE
THROUGH FORMAL TRAINING.
>> John: THAT'S NOT GREAT!
NOBODY SHOULD BE LEARNING HOW TO
DO THEIR JOB FROM A TV SHOW.
UNLESS, OF COURSE, YOUR JOB
HAPPENS TO BE "TELLING JOKES TO
MASK YOUR DEEP-SEATED FEELINGS
OF EMPTINESS AND EXISTENTIAL
DREAD," IN WHICH CASE: KEEP
WATCHING!
YOU MIGHT PICK UP SOME TIPS!
SO IF "LAW & ORDER" IS BEING
CO-SIGNED BY ELECTED LEADERS,
AND EVERYONE FROM TV PUNDITS TO
ACTUAL COPS ARE USING IT TO
LEARN ABOUT LAW ENFORCEMENT, WE
THOUGHT TONIGHT, WE'D TAKE A
LOOK AT WHAT THIS FRANCHISE HAS
ACTUALLY BEEN TEACHING US.
AND LET'S START WITH THE FACT
THAT THE LINE BETWEEN COP SHOWS
AND ACTUAL COPS HAS ALWAYS BEEN
A LITTLE BLURRY.
IN FACT THE FIRST HIT COP SHOW,
"DRAGNET," WHICH DEBUTED ON TV
IN 1951, MADE A BIG SELLING
POINT OF ITS AUTHENTICITY, RIGHT
FROM THE START OF EACH EPISODE.
>> LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, THE
STORY YOU ARE ABOUT TO SEE IS
TRUE.
THE NAMES HAVE BEEN CHANGED TO
PROTECT THE INNOCENT.
♪ ♪
>> John: I GOTTA SAY, THE
SURPRISING THING THERE IS THAT
IT STARTS WITH "LADIES AND
GENTLEMEN," AS THAT SOUNDS LIKE
THE SORT OF VOICE THAT WOULD SAY
"LETTING YOUR WIFE WATCH
TELEVISION COULD GIVE HER
NOTIONS."
BUT THAT CLAIM OF VERISIMILITUDE
CAME AT A PRICE -- DRAGNET'S
STAR AND CREATOR, JACK WEBB,
AGREED THAT SCRIPTS WOULD BE
FORMALLY APPROVED BY THE LAPD'S
PUBLIC INFORMATION DIVISION --
AND IN RETURN, THE SHOW COULD
SHOOT WHEREVER THEY WANTED, HAVE
COPS FOR EXTRAS, AND USE POLICE
VEHICLES AND EQUIPMENT.
WHICH WAS A PRETTY GOOD DEAL FOR
BOTH SIDES -- THE SHOW GOT A
PATINA OF AUTHENTICITY, AND THE
LAPD GOT A FLATTERING PORTRAYAL,
WHICH IT FRANKLY NEEDED, GIVEN
THAT, RIGHT AFTER DRAGNET
PREMIERED, APPROXIMATELY FIFTY
LAPD OFFICERS BRUTALLY BEAT
SEVEN MEN IN THEIR CUSTODY FOR
OVER AN HOUR, LEAVING THEM
HOSPITALIZED WITH BROKEN BONES
AND RUPTURED ORGANS -- IN AN
INCIDENT THAT LATER BECOME KNOWN
AS "BLOODY CHRISTMAS."
SO IF DRAGNET REALLY WANTED TO
BE AUTHENTIC, EVERY EPISODE
SHOULD'VE PROBABLY STARTED LIKE
THIS:
>> LADIES AND GENTLEMEN.
THE STORY YOU ARE ABOUT TO SEE
IS BULLSHIT.
THE NAMES HAVE BEEN CHANGED TO
PROTECT THE LAPD BECAUSE THEY
HELPED SAVE US A BUNCH OF MONEY
ON PROPS.
♪ ♪
>> John: DRAGNET HAD A BIG
IMPACT ON VIEWERS AT THE TIME,
INCLUDING ONE PARTICULAR LITTLE
BOY, WHO LATER REMINISCED ABOUT
BEING FIVE OR SIX YEARS OLD, AND
ALLOWED TO STAY UP BECAUSE
"DRAGNET" WAS ON.
THAT BOY EVENTUALLY GREW UP TO
BECOME SUCH A HOUSEHOLD NAME,
SOMEONE ONCE DID THIS TO THEIR
OWN BODY:
>> HERE IT IS, THE WORDS,
"EXECUTIVE PRODUCER: DICK WOLF."
>> LOOK AT -- LOOK AT --
>> ON HIS LOWER BACK.
>> YES, YEAH.
>> THE MAN SAYS HE GOT IT
BECAUSE HE'S OBSESSED WITH "LAW
& ORDER."
>> John: YEAH.
A DICK WOLF TATTOO.
THAT'S REAL STAR POWER,
ESPECIALLY FOR AN EXECUTIVE
PRODUCER.
PERHAPS THAT'S WHY ICE-T HIMSELF
ONCE SIMPLY TWEETED,
"DICK WOLF," AND IT GOT
108 LIKES.
DICK WOLF IS ONE OF THOSE NAMES,
LIKE "STEVE MADDEN" OR "CHARLES
SCHWAB," THAT YOU SEE ALL THE
TIME, EVEN IF YOU HAVE NO IDEA
WHAT DICK WOLF HIMSELF ACTUALLY
LOOKS LIKE.
CASE IN POINT: THAT'S NOT DICK
WOLF, THAT'S CHARLES SCHWAB --
THIS IS DICK WOLF.
EXCEPT IT ISN'T, THAT'S STEVE
MADDEN.
THIS IS DICK WOLF.
IS WHAT I WOULD SAY IF THAT WAS
HIM, BUT IT'S JUST A STOCK IMAGE
THAT CAME UP WHEN WE SEARCHED
"BUSINESS GRANDPA."
THIS, I PROMISE, IS THE REAL
DICK WOLF.
AND DICK WOLF WAS THE
SIX-YEAR-OLD "DRAGNET" FAN WHO
THEN GREW UP TO CREATE "LAW &
ORDER."
AND INTERESTINGLY, HE ACTUALLY
STARTED OUT IN ADVERTISING,
WHERE AMONG OTHER THINGS, HE
HELPED CREATE THIS WILDLY SEXIST
AD CAMPAIGN FOR NATIONAL
AIRLINES.
>> I'M JUDY, AND I WAS BORN TO
FLY.
FLY ME TO HOUSTON.
NATIONAL HAS NONSTOP DC-10S
EVERY DAY, OR FLY ME TO NEW
ORLEANS ON THE ONLY DC-10S.
YOU CAN FLY ME MORNING,
AFTERNOON, OR NIGHT.
JUST SAY WHEN.
I'M JUDY, AND I WAS BORN TO FLY.
FLY ME.
>> FLY JUDY.
FLY NATIONAL.
>> John: HOLY SHIT.
I CAN ONLY IMAGINE THE TARGET
DEMO OF THAT WERE MEN AGED
EIGHTEEN TO FORTY WHO LIVE BY
THE MOTTO "CAN'T FUCK IT?
DON'T WANT IT."
THE WHOLE "FLY ME" CAMPAIGN WAS
A BIG SUCCESS, AND DICK WOLF
LATER BRAGGED ABOUT IT TO THE
LEAST APPROPRIATE PERSON
IMAGINABLE.
>> YOU WERE IN ADVERTISING
BEFORE AS A WRITER.
>> AS A WRITER-PRODUCER, I
MADE COMMERCIALS.
>> YOU MADE COMMERCIALS. WHAT
WERE SOME OF THE COMMERCIALS?
WOULD PEOPLE RECOGNIZE THESE
COMMERCIALS TODAY?
>> OH, SURE.
"I'M CHERYL -- FLY ME."
>> "I'M CHERYL -- FLY ME."
HEY, HEY, THAT'S -- TODAY,
THAT'S IMMEDIATE SEXUAL
DISCRIMEN -- IT'S SEXUAL
HARASSMENT, IT'S IMMEDIATELY
GOING TO PRISON.
>> [LAUGHS]
THAT'S -- OH, NO, IT -- BUT
INTERESTINGLY ENOUGH --
>> SEVEN YEARS.
>> INTERESTINGLY ENOUGH, I THINK
I -- IT WAS AT THE TIME ONE OF
THE MOST SUCCESSFUL AIRLINE
CAMPAIGNS EVER 'CAUSE IT WAS
AIMED AT THE --
>> I'M -- "I'M CHERYL -- FLY
ME."
>> IT WAS AIMED AT BUSINESSMEN,
AND ALL THE STEWARDESSES WERE
FROM THE UNIVERSITY OF FLORIDA
AND WERE 22 YEARS OLD.
THAT'S WHY THEY FLEW THE
AIRLINE.
>> OH, WOW.
I'M SURPRISED THAT DIDN'T END
YOUR CAREER.
>> John: YEAH.
IF YOU'VE OUT-MISOGYNIED ROGER
AILES, THE MAN BEST KNOWN FOR
SEXUALLY HARASSING SO HARD HE
DIED, YOU KNOW YOU'VE MADE AN
OUTRAGEOUSLY WRONG TURN.
IT'S LIKE SOMEONE SAYING "YOU
LOOK LOST" AND IT TURNING OUT
THAT SOMEONE WAS AMELIA EARHART.
YOU'RE IN BIG TROUBLE.
AFTER LEAVING ADVERTISING, WOLF
WORKED ON COP SHOWS LIKE "HILL
STREET BLUES" AND "MIAMI VICE,"
AND IN 1990, HE HAD HIS MONSTER
HIT, "LAW & ORDER," WHICH HE
EVEN GAVE HIS OWN VERSION OF THE
"DRAGNET" PREAMBLE, ONE THAT I'M
GUESSING YOU CAN RECITE BY
HEART.
YOU KNOW HOW IT GOES:
>> IN THE CRIMINAL JUSTICE
SYSTEM, THE PEOPLE ARE
REPRESENTED BY TWO SEPARATE YET
EQUALLY IMPORTANT GROUPS.
THE POLICE WHO INVESTIGATE CRIME
AND THE DISTRICT ATTORNEYS WHO
PROSECUTE THE OFFENDERS.
THESE ARE THEIR STORIES.
DUN-DUN."
NOW, THE "THESE ARE THEIR
STORIES" PART IS REALLY
IMPORTANT.
BECAUSE A BIG SELLING POINT FOR
"LAW & ORDER" IS THAT, SIMILAR
TO "DRAGNET," IT DRAWS
INSPIRATION FROM REAL-LIFE
CASES.
IN FACT, AS WOLF RECOUNTS, WHEN
THE NETWORK ASKED HIM,
"WHAT'S THE BIBLE FOR THE SHOW?"
HE SAID, "THE FRONT PAGE OF THE
NEW YORK POST.
NO WRITERS ARE GOING TO DO
BETTER THAN HEADLESS BODY FOUND
IN TOPLESS BAR."
WHICH IS A CATCHY THING TO SAY,
BUT I'M NOT SURE IT'S TRUE.
"ASSLESS CORPSE FOUND AT
BOTTOMLESS BRUNCH."
THERE, I JUST DID IT.
AND LIKE JACK WEBB IN LA, DICK
WOLF CULTIVATED A CLOSE
BEHIND-THE-SCENES RELATIONSHIP
WITH THE NYPD, EMPLOYING FORMER
OFFICERS AS CONSULTANTS, AND
BOASTING ABOUT THE ACCESS HE
HAD.
>> I'VE PROBABLY SPENT MORE
TIME-SPENT MORE TIME WITH COPS
THAN ANYBODY WHO DOESN'T CARRY A
BADGE.
SO, I MEAN, WHEN YOU MEET
PEOPLE, YOU MEET COPS, YOU MEET
WHETHER IT'S BILL BRATTON OR RAY
KELLY OR SHERIFF BACA, YOU KNOW,
THERE IS A SHARED INTEREST IN
PUTTING BAD GUYS AWAY AND HAVING
COPS, YOU KNOW, SHOWN IN A
DECENT LIGHT.
I AM KIND OF UNABASHEDLY PRO LAW
ENFORCEMENT.
>> John: YIKES.
DICK WOLF IS THE MOST
ENTHUSIASTIC CHRONICLER OF BLUE
LIVES SINCE JAMES CAMERON.
AND WHILE NOT AS FORMAL AS
"DRAGNET"'S ARRANGEMENT, "LAW &
ORDER" HAS SIMILARLY BENEFITED
FROM ITS RELATIONSHIP WITH THE
NYPD.
ONE WRITER WHO'S WORKED ON THE
SHOW HAS SAID, "THERE WAS ALWAYS
THE SENSE THAT IF WE TOLD
STORIES THAT REFLECTED TOO BADLY
ON THE POLICE, THE NYPD COULD
MAKE IT VERY DIFFICULT FOR US TO
SHOOT IN NEW YORK."
WHICH DOES MAKE SENSE.
THE NYPD IS FAMOUSLY
ANTI-SHOOTING UNLESS THEY'RE THE
ONES DOING IT.
IN FACT, FOR AS MUCH AS DICK
WOLF BRAGS ABOUT HOW THE SHOW IS
WRITTEN IN SHADES OF GREY, OR
HOW IT'LL SHOW BOTH SIDES OF AN
ISSUE, THERE'S ONE SIDE THAT
IT'S ALWAYS ON, AND THAT'S THE
POLICE.
BECAUSE HOWEVER FLAWED HIS
CHARACTERS MAY BE, THEY'RE ALL,
FUNDAMENTALLY, PURSUING JUSTICE
-- AND COPS LOVE BEING PORTRAYED
THAT WAY, AS ACTORS ON THE SHOW
HAVE ATTESTED OVER THE YEARS.
>> POLICE AROUND THE COUNTRY, I
MUST SAY, ARE BIG FANS OF THE
SHOW BECAUSE THEY FEEL IT'S
AUTHENTIC.
>> A COUPLE HOMICIDE COPS CAME
OVER TO VISIT.
>> THEY JUST HAD WONDERFUL
THINGS TO SAY ABOUT THE SHOW AND
THEY SAID THANK YOU AND -- THEY
WERE THANKING ME, WHICH WAS
WEIRD.
THEY FELT LIKE THEY WERE BEING
WELL-REPRESENTED.
>> WELL, MY FAVORITE QUOTE FROM
THE POLICE IS, "KEEP MAKING US
LOOK GOOD," WHICH IS A NICE
COMPLIMENT.
THEY'RE VERY, VERY KIND.
>> John: YEAH, I BET THEY ARE!
THOUGH, FOR WHAT IT'S WORTH,
THERE IS A PRETTY MAJOR
DIFFERENCE BETWEEN "THEY FEEL
IT'S AUTHENTIC" AND "THEY FEEL
IT MAKES THEM LOOK GOOD."
AND IT'S THE SAME DIFFERENCE
BETWEEN THESE TWO PHOTOS.
ONE IS A MIRROR OF REALITY, AND
THE OTHER IS A LIE.
AND LOOK, THANKS TO "LAW &
ORDER"'S CLOSE COLLABORATION
WITH ITS POLICE CONSULTANTS, THE
SHOW DOES GET A LOT OF SMALLER
DETAILS RIGHT -- LIKE SPECIFIC
LAWS, JARGON, AND CRIME SCENE
PROCEDURES.
BUT CRUCIALLY, IT ALSO MAKES A
LOT OF CHOICES THAT
SIGNIFICANTLY DISTORT THE BIG
PICTURE OF POLICING.
FOR INSTANCE, MOST EPISODES
ARREST THE RIGHT PERPETRATORS AT
THE MIDPOINT, AND THEN CONVICT
THEM AT THE END.
AND IT'S STRUCTURED LIKE THIS
FOR OBVIOUS REASONS -- IT'S A
SELF-CONTAINED EPISODE OF TV,
AND THOSE NEED SATISFYING
NARRATIVE ARC FULFILLMENT.
BUT IN REALITY, NOT ONLY DO MANY
CASES SIMPLY GO UNSOLVED, ALMOST
NONE OF THE ONES THAT DO GET
SOLVED, GO TO TRIAL.
PROSECUTORS PUT MASSIVE PRESSURE
ON DEFENDANTS TO TAKE PLEA
DEALS, MEANING THAT 97% OF
CRIMINAL CASES DON'T GO TO
TRIAL.
AND OBVIOUSLY, "LAW & ORDER"
CAN'T REFLECT THAT REALITY.
IT'D BE UNWATCHABLE.
NO ONE WANTS A SHOW WHERE 97% OF
EPISODES END WITH TWO LAWYERS
STRIKING A DEAL IN A WINDOWLESS
ROOM, AND THEN YOU GET TO WATCH
THE DEFENDANT SERVE 6 MONTHS,
THEN STRUGGLE TO GET A JOB AT
THEIR LOCAL JIFFY LUBE.
BUT THE COURTROOM HALF OF "LAW &
ORDER" ACTUALLY REPRESENTS A
SIGNIFICANT DEPARTURE FROM TV
TRADITION.
BECAUSE HISTORICALLY, LAWYER
SHOWS CENTERED DEFENSE LAWYERS
LIKE PERRY MASON, WHO TRIED TO
WORK AGAINST THE SYSTEM AS THE
UNDERDOG AND FREE INNOCENT
PEOPLE.
BUT "LAW & ORDER" IS DIFFERENT,
AND THAT'S VERY MUCH BY DESIGN.
DICK WOLF HAS SAID, "I BELIEVED
THE HEROES WEREN'T THE DEFENSE
ATTORNEYS WHO WERE GETTING THESE
SCUMBAGS OFF, THE HEROES WERE
THE PROSECUTORS."
AND YOU CAN SEE THAT ON HIS
SHOWS, WHERE DEFENSE ATTORNEYS
ARE USUALLY PRESENTED AS AN
IMPEDIMENT TO CONVICTING
OBVIOUSLY-GUILTY SUSPECTS, AND
THE TARGET OF LINES LIKE THIS:
>> IF A COLD CHILL JUST RAN UP
YOUR SPINE, IT'S BECAUSE A
DEFENSE ATTORNEY JUST WALKED IN
HERE.
>> DEFENSE ATTORNEYS DISTORT THE
FACTS.
THEY TWIST EVIDENCE.
>> I BELIEVE IN MONSTERS AND
THINGS THAT GO BUMP IN THE
NIGHT, JACK.
MAY THEY ROT IN HELL, ALONG WITH
THEIR ATTORNEYS.
>> OH, LET ME GUESS.
THE DEVIL'S ERRAND BOY,
OTHERWISE KNOWN AS A
DEFENSE ATTORNEY?
>> John: OKAY, COUPLE THINGS.
ONE, YES, THAT IS A POST-O-C
MISCHA BARTON DOING SOME
AWARD-WORTHY EYEBROW ACTING.
BUT TWO, DEFENSE ATTORNEYS ARE A
VITAL PART OF THE JUSTICE
SYSTEM, SO IT'S A BIT WEIRD THAT
"LAW & ORDER" CAN SOMETIMES GO
OUT OF ITS WAY TO PRESENT THEM
LIKE THE BABADOOK.
AND AGAIN, YOU CAN ABSOLUTELY
JUSTIFY THOSE DECISIONS BY
SAYING, "COME ON, THEY'RE MAKING
FICTION, NOT A DOCUMENTARY.
NOT EVERYONE WANTS TO WATCH
HYPER-REALISTIC PORTRAYALS OF
OUR EVER-DESSICATING SOCIETY,
JOHN."
AND I DO UNDERSTAND THAT.
BUT IT'S NOT JUST THE PORTRAYAL
OF DEFENSE LAWYERS WHERE BIG
EDITORIAL DECISIONS ARE BEING
MADE.
ONE STUDY FOUND THAT OFFENDERS
ON "LAW & ORDER" WERE
DISPROPORTIONATELY WHITE, MALE,
OLDER, AND FROM THE MIDDLE OR
UPPER CLASSES.
DICK WOLF'S ACTUALLY EXPLAINED
HIS REASONING FOR WHY THE SHOW'S
CRIMINALS SKEW THAT WAY, SAYING,
"THERE ARE NO RICH WHITE GUY
PRESSURE GROUPS.
YOU CAN DO ANYTHING YOU WANT TO
RICH, WHITE GUYS, AND NOBODY
CARES."
AND YOU CAN SEE WHY HE MIGHT NOT
WANT TO MAKE A SHOW IN WHICH HIS
GOOD-GUY COPS ARE
DISPROPORTIONATELY TARGETING
COMMUNITIES OF COLOR.
HE WANTS PEOPLE TO LIKE THEM.
BUT THE RESULT OF ALL THESE
CREATIVE DECISIONS IS THAT,
INSTEAD OF DEPICTING A FLAWED
SYSTEM RIDDLED WITH STRUCTURAL
RACISM, THE SHOW PRESENTS
EXCEPTIONALLY COMPETENT COPS,
WORKING WITHIN A LARGELY FAIR
FRAMEWORK THAT MOSTLY CONVICTS
WHITE PEOPLE.
AND WHILE IT'S TRUE THAT THEY'VE
OCCASIONALLY DONE EPISODES
FOCUSING ON INDIVIDUAL BAD COPS,
OR REFERENCED REAL-WORLD
CRITICISMS -- ESPECIALLY
RECENTLY, WITH DISCUSSIONS OF
ANTI-POLICE SENTIMENT BEING
SHOEHORNED INTO CONVERSATIONS --
IN GENERAL, POLICE REFORMS ARE
OFTEN PORTRAYED BY THE MAIN
CHARACTERS AS AT BEST A NUISANCE
TO THEM, AND AT WORST A THREAT
TO PUBLIC SAFETY.
>> 16 MURDERS OVER FOURTH OF
JULY.
>> THEY CUT BACK ON THE STOP AND
SEARCHES, PEOPLE START CARRYING.
>> YOU TWO HAD HIM YESTERDAY,
AND YOU LET HIM GO?
>> THERE WASN'T PROBABLE CAUSE
FOR AN ARREST.
>> YOU CREATE PROBABLE CAUSE.
YOU PUSH HIM AROUND, YOU PROVOKE
HIM!
>> AFTER ERIC GARNER AND THE
STOP-AND-FRISK LAWSUITS, 1PP'S
BEEN VERY CLEAR.
DON'T MAKE A SCENE.
>> LIKE IT OR NOT, NOLAN, THE
BIG BAD POLICE DEPARTMENT IS OUR
PARTNER.
AND IN CASE YOU HAVEN'T BEEN
PAYING ATTENTION, THEY'RE UNDER
ATTACK.
EVERY DECISION, EVERY ARREST IS
SCRUTINIZED.
THERE ARE PEOPLE TRYING TO
DEFUND THEM, FOR GOD'S SAKE.
AND HERE YOU ARE, ASKING ME TO
CASTRATE THEM?
>> John: OH, NO!
SCRUTINIZING ARRESTS?!
HOW AWFUL!
IT'S PRETTY TELLING THAT, EVEN
IN THIS FICTIONAL UNIVERSE,
BASIC POLICE ACCOUNTABILITY IS
TREATED AS AN EQUIVALENT TO
GETTING YOUR BALLS CUT OFF.
BUT MAYBE THE BEST EXPRESSION OF
THE DISPARITY BETWEEN "LAW &
ORDER" AND REAL LIFE IS IN ITS
MOST POPULAR SPINOFF, "SVU."
IT'S A SHOW BUILT ON THE APPEAL
OF HAVING COPS WHO'LL STOP AT
NOTHING TO CRACK HORRIFIC CASES.
COPS LIKE ELLIOTT STABLER,
WHO -- BEFORE GETTING A SPINOFF
SHOW -- ROUTINELY DID SHIT LIKE
THIS:
>> SORRY TO KEEP YOU WAITING.
>> HEY!
>> I GET A LITTLE CLUMSY AROUND
SCUMBAG PEDOPHILES.
>> WHY YOU GOT TO BE SO ROUGH?
>> BECAUSE YOU STILL GOT ONE
GOOD ARM LEFT TO BREAK.
I SHOULD PUT YOU IN PIGTAILS,
YOU LITTLE BITCH.
COME ON, YOU LITTLE BITCH, I
WANT YOU TO CRY FOR ME.
COME ON, TELL ME!
COME ON!
CRY FOR ME!
>> I DON'T KNOW WHAT THE HELL
YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT.
>> DO YOU THINK I AM SOME DUMB
COP?
>> I HAD NOTHING TO --
>> ELLIOT.
>> YOU THINK YOU'RE SMARTER THAN
ME?
>> I NEED A DOCTOR.
>> YOU'RE GONNA NEED A MORGUE,
PAL.
>> John: LEAVE WILL ARNETT
ALONE!
LOOK, I ADMIT, AS A VIEWER, IT
IS SOMETHING TO SEE STABLER CHEW
UP THE SCENERY AND SPIT IT OUT
DIRECTLY INTO MATTHEW MODINE'S
FACE.
IS IT THE MODEL OF GOOD POLICE
BEHAVIOR?
ABSOLUTELY NOT.
IS IT COMPELLING TO WATCH?
FOR SURE.
IS IT HOT?
REASONABLE PEOPLE CAN DISAGREE.
BUT GENERALLY, THE THESIS ON
"SVU" IS THAT THE COPS DEEPLY
CARE ABOUT GETTING JUSTICE FOR
VICTIMS, AND THEIR GUT INSTINCTS
MEAN THEY ALMOST ALWAYS GET THE
JOB DONE IN THE END.
IN ONE EPISODE, WE LEARN THAT
STABLER HAS A 97% CASE CLOSURE
RATE.
AND PEOPLE LOVE THIS SHOW.
CHRISTOPHER MELONI IS THE
INTERNET'S "ZADDY," AND YOU CAN
SEE WHY -- HIS ASS ALONE IS A
POP-CULTURE ICON.
AND MARISKA HARGITAY HAS A HUGE
CULT FOLLOWING, TOO.
FANS HAVE TATTOOS OF HER, TAYLOR
SWIFT HAS A CAT NAMED FOR HER
CHARACTER, OLIVIA BENSON, AND
THERE ARE EVEN TIKTOKS LIKE
THIS:
>> DIDDLE YOU WHEN YOU WERE A
KID?
DADDY'S LITTLE GIRL?
♪ ♪
[LAUGHTER]
>> John: IN GENERAL, I THINK
I'VE MADE MY POSITION ON POLICE
BRUTALITY PRETTY CLEAR.
BUT I'LL ADMIT, IT'S HARD TO
RESIST THE SIGHT OF OLIVIA
BENSON SLAMMING AN ASSHOLE'S
HEAD ON A TABLE TO THE BEAT OF
"HOLLABACK GIRL."
GO OFF, GIRL BOSS!
LEAN IN TO STATE SPONSORED
VIOLENCE!
AND THERE'S SOMETHING INCREDIBLY
APPEALING ABOUT THE IDEA OF A
WORLD WHERE SURVIVORS OF SEXUAL
ASSAULT ARE TAKEN SERIOUSLY BY
THE POLICE.
HARGITAY'S EVEN SPOKEN ABOUT
SOME OF THE SHOW'S POSITIVE
REAL-WORLD IMPACTS.
>> I HAVE SO MANY TIMES
ENCOUNTERED PEOPLE THAT HAVE
SAID BECAUSE OF THIS SHOW THEY
KNEW WHAT TO DO AFTER THEIR
ASSAULT.
BECAUSE OF THIS SHOW, THEY HAD A
RAPE KIT DONE.
BECAUSE OF THE SHOW, THEY
REPORTED AND HAD FAITH IN THAT.
AND BECAUSE OF THE SHOW, MOST OF
ALL, THEY DIDN'T FEEL ALONE
ANYMORE.
AND TO ME, WHEN I STARTED
HEARING THOSE STORIES IS WHEN I
KNEW THAT IT WASN'T JUST A TV
SHOW ANYMORE.
IT WAS SO MUCH MORE.
>> John: YEAH, THAT'S OBVIOUSLY
MOVING.
AND I DON'T DOUBT THE SHOW IS
DOING IMPORTANT WORK FOR SOME OF
ITS VIEWERS, IN BETWEEN SHOWING
HER SLAMMING A SUSPECT'S FACE
INTO A TABLE LIKE SHE'S A
TODDLER MAKING TWO BARBIES KISS.
AND TO HER CREDIT, MARISKA
HARGITAY HAS TRIED TO PARLAY HER
FAME INTO ADVOCACY, FOUNDING AN
ORGANIZATION WHICH ADVOCATES FOR
SURVIVORS OF SEXUAL ASSAULT,
DOMESTIC ABUSE, AND CHILD ABUSE.
BUT IF, AS HARGITAY SAYS, THE
SHOW ENCOURAGES PEOPLE TO AVAIL
THEMSELVES OF THIS SYSTEM, IT'S
WORTH KNOWING WHAT THAT SYSTEM
CAN LOOK LIKE IN PRACTICE.
BECAUSE IT'S NOT GOOD.
GOVERNMENT AND PRESS REPORTS
HAVE REPEATEDLY SHOWN THAT
NEW YORK'S ACTUAL SEX CRIMES
UNIT IS SET UP TO FAIL VICTIMS
OF SEXUAL ASSAULT.
BECAUSE ITS CASE CLOSURE RATE IS
A LONG WAY FROM ELLIOT STABLER'S
97%.
THE NYPD'S OFFICIAL FIGURES SHOW
THEY ONLY CLOSE ABOUT A THIRD OF
SEXUAL-ASSAULT CASES.
BUT ONE ANALYSIS OF CASES
HANDLED OVER A TWO-YEAR PERIOD
FOUND A CLOSURE RATE OF JUST 6%.
AND A DAMNING 2018 INVESTIGATION
INTO NEW YORK'S SVD QUOTED
MULTIPLE PROSECUTORS DESCRIBING
IMPROPER HANDLING OF CASES BY
OVERLOADED OR INEXPERIENCED
INVESTIGATORS, WHO UNTIL
RECENTLY WERE ONLY GIVEN FIVE
DAYS OF FORMAL SPECIALIZED
TRAINING.
IS IT ANY WONDER THAT SOME COPS
ARE WATCHING "SVU" FOR TIPS?
WHICH MAY NOT BE SUCH A BAD
THING WHEN YOU GET JUSTICE
CRUSADER OLIVIA BENSON, BUT GETS
A LITTLE HAIRY WHEN YOU GET USE
OF EXCESSIVE FORCE ZADDY.
AND WHILE THE NYPD INSISTS
THEY'VE SINCE IMPROVED STAFFING
AND TRAINING, THE DOJ RECENTLY
ANNOUNCED THEIR OWN
INVESTIGATION, CITING REPORTS
THAT THE UNIT'S OFFICERS WERE
"FAILING TO CONDUCT BASIC
INVESTIGATIVE STEPS AND INSTEAD
SHAMING AND ABUSING SURVIVORS
AND RE-TRAUMATIZING THEM DURING
INVESTIGATIONS."
AND YET, THE PORTRAIT "SVU"
PAINTS OF THE DIVISION IS SO
CONVINCING THAT WHEN A NEW
COMMANDER TOOK OVER IN 2020, IN
AN INTERVIEW THAT DISCUSSED THAT
SCATHING INTERNAL REPORT I JUST
MENTIONED, HERE'S HOW THE ANCHOR
WRAPPED UP THE CONVERSATION.
>> YOU KNOW I'M GONNA ASK THIS
BECAUSE I'M OBSESSED WITH THE TV
SHOW "LAW & ORDER: SVU," HOW
REAL IS THE TV SHOW TO REAL
LIFE?
>> I CAN TELL YOU THIS, THE
DEDICATION YOU SEE ON TV WITH
THE INVESTIGATORS, THAT'S THE
SAME DEDICATION --
>> YEAH.
>> THAT WE HAVE WITHIN THE REAL
SPECIAL VICTIMS UNIT AND THE
CASES ARE VERY, VERY SIMILAR.
AS HEINOUS AS YOU SEE THEM ON
TV, WE ARE SEEING THE SAME THING
IN REAL LIFE.
>> SO MANY OF THEM ARE RIPPED
FROM THE HEADLINES, YOU KNOW.
>> John: WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
WHY STOP THE FAWNING THERE?
JUST KEEP IT GOING!
"ARE YOU REALLY AS COOL AS YOU
SEEM ON TV?
DO YOU SOMETIMES MAKE THE CAR GO
WEE-WOO EVEN IF IT DOESN'T NEED
TO GO WEE-WOO?
IS ICE-T NICE?"
AND IT'S WORTH KNOWING: SOME
SURVIVORS HAVE SPOKEN ABOUT WHAT
IT'S LIKE SEEING THESE
DETECTIVES VALORIZED ON TV, WITH
ONE SAYING, "LAW & ORDER: SVU"
GAVE ME THE FALSE IMPRESSION
THAT THIS SQUAD CARED DEEPLY
ABOUT VICTIMS AND THEIR JOBS,
AND ANOTHER SAYING, "IF I HAD A
DOLLAR FOR EVERY TIME I HEARD,
'THIS CAN'T BE TRUE.
OLIVIA BENSON WOULD NEVER LET
THIS HAPPEN!' I WOULD HAVE
ENOUGH TO COVER MY HOSPITAL
BILLS AND THERAPY FOR MY
TRAUMA."
AND YOU SHOULD KNOW: EVEN THE
REAL-WORLD VERSION OF THE
TENACIOUS, UNCOMPROMISING OLIVIA
BENSON, AND THE SHOW'S TOUGH
ADA, ALEXANDRA CABOT, HAS A
SIGNIFICANT ASTERISK, BECAUSE A
MAJOR INSPIRATION FOR BOTH
CHARACTERS IS LINDA FAIRSTEIN,
THE WOMAN INFAMOUS FOR
PROSECUTING THE CENTRAL PARK
FIVE, OR AS THEY'RE NOW KNOWN,
THE EXONERATED FIVE.
AND I WILL SAY: SOME BEHIND THE
SHOW ARE AWARE OF ITS ROLE IN
PERPETUATING A FALSE NARRATIVE
ABOUT POLICE.
IN FACT, IN 2020, AT THE PEAK OF
THE BLACK LIVES MATTER PROTESTS,
WARREN LEIGHT REFLECTED ON THE
ROLE THE SHOW PLAYS IN OUR
DISCUSSION OF POLICING.
>> SO, YOU KNOW, INDIVIDUALLY,
AM I DOING -- AM I CONTRIBUTING
-- MIS-CONTRIBUTING TO SOCIETY?
I DON'T KNOW.
COLLECTIVELY, ARE WE?
YEAH.
SO -- SO, HOW DO YOU-WHAT DO YOU
DO?
CAN YOU GO INTO THE NETWORK?
I HAVE PITCHED THE -- BY THE
WAY, I THINK EVERY WRITER HAS
PITCHED THE INNOCENCE PROJECT
SERIES TO THE NETWORKS.
I'VE MADE THAT PITCH.
I BET IT HAS A BETTER CHANCE OF
GOING NOW.
AND WITHIN THE DICK WOLF LAW AND
ORDER UNIVERSE, IT WON'T BE
LIKELY THAT THEY'RE GOING TO DO
A SHOW THAT REVEALS THAT -- THAT
BASES ITSELF ON COPS BEHAVING
ILLEGAL.
THAT'S NOT PART OF -- OF THAT --
OF DICK'S BRAND.
>> John: EXACTLY.
EVEN IF THE PEOPLE WORKING ON
THE SHOW -- THE ACTORS, WRITERS
AND SHOWRUNNERS -- HAVE GOOD
INTENTIONS ABOUT CORRECTING THE
RECORD, THERE'S ONLY SO MUCH
THEY CAN DO.
"LAW & ORDER" IS NEVER GOING TO
GRAPPLE WITH THE REALITY OF
POLICING IN A MEANINGFUL WAY,
FOR THE SAME REASONS DANIEL
TIGER WON'T.
IT'S JUST NEVER GOING TO HAPPEN,
AND HONESTLY, YOU'D BE PRETTY
WEIRDED OUT IF IT DID.
BECAUSE FUNDAMENTALLY, THE
PERSON WHO'S RESPONSIBLE FOR
"LAW & ORDER" AND ITS BRAND IS
DICK WOLF.
AND HE KNOWS EXACTLY WHAT HE
WANTS HE WANTS HIS SHOW TO DO,
AND -- IMPORTANTLY -- NOT TO DO.
HERE HE IS INVOKING ONE OF THE
MOST NOTORIOUS CASES OF POLICE
ABUSE IN NEW YORK CITY, ABNER
LOUIMA, WHO WAS BEATEN BY NYPD
OFFICERS AND SODOMIZED IN 1997.
>> WE'RE NOT THERE TO DO ABNER
LOUIMA.
THAT'S, YOU KNOW, THAT'S A
TERRIBLE THING THAT HAPPENED BUT
THAT REPRESENTS ONE OR TWO BAD
APPLES IN A POLICE FORCE OF
35,000 PEOPLE.
>> WE'RE CERTAINLY THE SHOW --
ALL THREE SHOWS ARE PROBABLY THE
BEST RECRUITING POSTER YOU COULD
HAVE FOR BEING A NEW YORK CITY
COP.
>> John: RIGHT.
BECAUSE A RECRUITING POSTER IS
ALWAYS GOING TO BE A
PROPAGANDIZED, HERO-WASHED
VERSION OF THE TRUTH.
A TRUTH WHICH IS MORE OFTEN THAN
NOT, VERY UGLY.
AND FOR THE 300TH TIME, I KNOW
"LAW & ORDER" IS JUST A TV SHOW.
I KNOW IT'S MEANT TO BE
ENTERTAINMENT.
AND HONESTLY, I'M NOT EVEN
TELLING YOU NOT TO WATCH IT.
IT'S COMPLETELY FINE TO ENJOY
IT, AND IT'S UNDERSTANDABLE TO
WANT OLIVIA BENSON TO EXIST.
BUT IT IS IMPORTANT TO REMEMBER
JUST HOW FAR IT IS FROM
REPRESENTING ANYTHING RESEMBLING
REALITY.
AS ONE CRITIC OF "LAW & ORDER"
HAS PUT IT, "IF A MEDICAL SHOW
WAS GIVING US INACCURATE
INFORMATION, WE WOULD SAY IT'S
DANGEROUS."
WHICH IS TRUE, BECAUSE THINK
ABOUT IT -- YOU KNOW
"GREY'S ANATOMY" DOESN'T DEPICT
WHAT HAPPENS INSIDE AN ACTUAL
HOSPITAL.
THOSE DOCTORS ARE RIDICULOUSLY
HOT, NONE OF THEM ARE NEARLY
TIRED ENOUGH, AND IT NEEDS ABOUT
5000% MORE DISCUSSION OF
INSURANCE.
BUT IF THOSE MEDICAL
PROFESSIONALS WERE ROUTINELY
CLAIMING THAT VACCINES CAUSE
AUTISM AND HERBAL REMEDIES CURE
CANCER, WE'D PROBABLY BE HAVING
A CONVERSATION ABOUT IT.
BECAUSE THAT'S ESSENTIALLY WHAT
"LAW & ORDER" IS DOING.
IT'S PRESENTING A WORLD WHERE
THE COPS CAN ALWAYS FIGURE OUT
WHO DID IT, DEFENSE ATTORNEYS
ARE IRRITATING OBSTACLES TO BE
OVERCOME, AND EVEN IF A COP
ROUGHS UP A SUSPECT, IT'S ALL IN
PURSUIT OF A JUST OUTCOME.
AND IT BLASTS THAT FANTASY AT
YOU IN ENDLESS RERUNS AND
MARATHONS, IN THE GUISE OF VERY
WELL-PRODUCED TV.
BUT UNDERNEATH IT ALL, IT'S A
COMMERCIAL, PRODUCED BY A MAN
WHO IS, IN HIS WORDS,
"UNABASHEDLY PRO-LAW
ENFORCEMENT," AND IS VERY GOOD
AT SELLING THINGS.
AND IN THIS INSTANCE, HE'S
SELLING A COMPLETE FANTASY THAT
MANY PEOPLE IN THIS COUNTRY ARE
ONLY TOO HAPPY TO BUY.
WHICH IS FINE -- AS LONG AS WE
DON'T LOSE SIGHT OF THE FACT
THAT IT'S AN AD FOR A DEFECTIVE
PRODUCT.
BECAUSE, IF I MAY QUOTE ONE LAST
TIME FROM THE LIBRARY OF
ALEXANDRIA THAT IS ICE-T'S
TWITTER ACCOUNT, "YOU GOTTA KNOW
WHO THE F YOU'RE DEALING WITH.
COULD BE THE COPS."
THAT'S OUR SHOW.
THANKS SO MUCH FOR WATCHING.
AND GIVEN TONIGHT'S STORY,
THERE'S ONLY ONE WAY TO END IT,
AND THAT'S THIS.
[DUN-DUN]
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]
♪ ♪