♪ ♪
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]
>> John: WELCOME, WELCOME,
WELCOME TO "LAST WEEK TONIGHT!"
I'M JOHN OLIVER.
THANKS SO MUCH FOR JOINING US.
IT'S BEEN A BUSY WEEK, AND A LOT
HAS HAPPENED.
IN IRAN, THERE'VE BEEN HUGE
PROTESTS OVER THE KILLING OF A
YOUNG WOMAN AFTER SHE WAS
ARRESTED BY THEIR MORALITY
POLICE, WE ALSO LEARNED THAT
ADAM LEVINE IS AS BAD AT SEXTING
AS HE IS AT COMING UP WITH
MEANINGFUL TATTOOS, AND JOE
BIDEN DECLARED THE PANDEMIC
OVER.
WHICH ISN'T JUST IRRESPONSIBLE,
IT'S COMPLETE BULLSHIT.
YOU CAN'T JUST DECLARE SOMETHING
AND MAKE IT A REALITY.
IF I DECLARE THE QUEEN IS ALIVE
THAT DOESN'T MAKE IT TRUE.
WE ALL KNOW SHE'S IN THE
AFTERLIFE NOW, LOOKING UP AT
DIANA.
BUT WE'RE GOING TO START WITH
RON DeSANTIS, FLORIDA GOVERNOR
AND PLAYMOBIL FIGURINE INSPIRED
BY A DETAILED HR COMPLAINT.
DeSANTIS MADE HEADLINES
RECENTLY, AFTER DOING THIS:
>> THIS MORNING, A SURPRISING
SCENE IN MARTHA'S VINEYARD.
TWO PLANES FILLED WITH ABOUT 50
MIGRANTS LANDING ON THE ISLAND.
>> 50 UNDOCUMENTED MIGRANTS,
INCLUDING SEVERAL CHILDREN,
ARRIVING IN MARTHA'S VINEYARD,
FLOWN IN BY FLORIDA REPUBLICAN
GOVERNOR AND PRESIDENTIAL
HOPEFUL RON DeSANTIS, AN EFFORT
TO TURN THE SPOTLIGHT TO
IMMIGRATION JUST TWO MONTHS
BEFORE THE MIDTERM ELECTIONS.
>> John: YEAH, IT CERTAINLY WAS
"A SURPRISING SCENE ON MARTHA'S
VINEYARD," WHICH, TO BE HONEST,
SOUNDS LIKE A ROMANCE NOVEL
DESIGNED TO MAKE YOU CUM
PUMPKIN SPICE.
AND LOOK: OBVIOUSLY, SENDING A
GROUP OF MIGRANTS THERE WAS
RECKLESS, BECAUSE MARTHA'S
VINEYARD ISN'T SET UP WITH ANY
OF THE KEY RESOURCES MIGRANTS
NEED, UNLESS FOR SOME REASON
THEY'RE DESPERATE FOR A
FISHMONGER TO OVER-DESCRIBE WHAT
IT WAS LIKE TO SELL JACKIE O A
POUND OF SCALLOPS IN 1983.
AND IF THIS SEEMS LIKE A STUNT
MADE FOR FOX NEWS, YOU'RE
ABSOLUTELY RIGHT -- BUT IT ALSO
MAY'VE BEEN MADE BY FOX NEWS.
BECAUSE JUST TWO MONTHS AGO,
TUCKER CARLSON DID A SEGMENT
POINTING OUT THE WHITENESS OF
MARTHA'S VINEYARD AND HAD THIS
FUN PROPOSAL:
>> THEY ARE BEGGING FOR MORE
DIVERSITY.
WHY NOT SEND MIGRANTS THERE, IN
HUGE NUMBERS?
LET'S START WITH 300,000 AND
MOVE UP FROM THERE.
>> John: OKAY, FIRST, MARTHA'S
VINEYARD IS AN ISLAND THAT HAS A
YEAR-ROUND POPULATION UNDER
20,000.
SUGGESTING SENDING 300,000 THERE
IS A LITTLE LIKE SUGGESTING YOU
LET TUCKER CARLSON BRING YOU TO
SEXUAL COMPLETION -- IT ISN'T
JUST A DISGUSTING IDEA, IT'S A
LOGISTICALLY IMPOSSIBLE ONE.
BUT IT SEEMS DeSANTIS JUST TOOK
THAT IDEA AND RAN WITH IT.
SO I GUESS IT'S TRUE THEY SAY:
GOOD ARTISTS BORROW, GREAT
ARTISTS STEAL, AND RACIST
GOVERNORS GET THEIR IDEAS YELLED
AT THEM BY THE HUMAN EQUIVALENT
OF THE BOAT SHOE FOUND AT THE
SCENE OF A HAZING DEATH.
THE STUNT WAS BOTH GRIM AND
DEEPLY CYNICAL, ESPECIALLY GIVEN
THE MIGRANTS WERE REPORTEDLY
LURED THERE WITH EMPTY PROMISES
OF JOBS AND HOUSING, AND EVEN
HANDED BROCHURES LISTING
GOVERNMENT ASSISTANCE THEY WERE
NOT ELIGIBLE FOR.
IN FACT, THAT BROCHURE WAS SO
SLOPPILY DESIGNED THAT, WHILE IT
FEATURED A FLAG FOR
MASSACHUSETTS, THAT'S NOT THE
STATE'S ACTUAL FLAG.
THIS IS THE REAL FLAG.
THAT IS JUST A FAKE FLAG THEY
FOUND FROM THIS POST ONLINE MADE
BY SOMEBODY WHO SAID, AND I
QUOTE, "THE CURRENT ONE BLOWS,
SO I MADE THIS ONE."
THE BOSTON GLOBE ACTUALLY
TRACKED DOWN THE GUY WHO MADE
IT, WHO SAID, "NO ONE HAD SEEN
THIS FLAG UNTIL SOME IDIOT
STAFFER FOR DeSANTIS OR WHOEVER"
STUMBLED ACROSS IT, "I CANNOT
FATHOM WHY THEY WOULD USE THE
WRONG ONE," ADDING, "THIS IS ALL
HILARIOUS, ALTHOUGH AT THE SAME
TIME DEEPLY SAD, BECAUSE THE
REAL STORY IS ASYLUM SEEKERS
BEING EXPLOITED AND HUMAN
TRAFFICKED."
WHICH IS ABSOLUTELY TRUE.
ALSO, HOW COULD RON DeSANTIS NOT
KNOW IT WAS THE WRONG FLAG?
HE SPENT THREE YEARS AT HARVARD
LAW SCHOOL, WHICH IS -- CORRECT
ME IF I'M WRONG -- IN FUCKING
MASSACHUSETTS!
I REALLY HOPE DeSANTIS PAID MORE
ATTENTION TO THE LAW PART OF LAW
SCHOOL, ESPECIALLY AS IT SEEMS
LIKE HE MIGHT WELL NEED IT,
GIVEN THAT A TEXAS SHERIFF HAS
OPENED A CRIMINAL INVESTIGATION
INTO THE MIGRANTS' TRIPS TO
MARTHA'S VINEYARD.
AND IF YOU'RE THINKING, "WHY A
TEXAS SHERIFF AND NOT A FLORIDA
ONE?," IT TURNS OUT, FOR ALL
DESANTIS'S TALK ABOUT THE
URGENCY OF THIS ISSUE FOR HIS
VOTERS, THESE MIGRANTS DIDN'T
EVEN COME FROM HIS STATE.
WHY NOT?
I'LL JUST LET HIM EXPLAIN.
>> THE PROBLEM IS IS WE'RE NOT
SEEING MASS MOVEMENTS OF THEM
INTO FLORIDA, SO YOU END UP WITH
A CAR WITH MAYBE TWO.
AND IF WE KNOW THAT THAT'S
ILLEGAL, AND THERE'S SOMEONE
THAT'S KINDA SMUGGLING, THEN
COMMITTING CRIME, THEN YOU CAN
DO ARRESTS, THERE HAVE BEEN DRUG
SEIZURES.
BUT THAT'S NOT EFFECTIVE ENOUGH
TO STOP THE MASS MIGRATION, BUT
IT'S JUST COMING IN
ONESIE-TWOSIES.
>> John: OKAY, FIRST;
"ONESIE-TWOSIES?"
THESE ARE REAL PEOPLE'S LIVES,
NOT A BABY'S FUCKING TOES.
BUT SECOND, IT SEEMS, THIS HUGE
PROBLEM FOR HIS STATE, MASS
MIGRATION, IS ACTUALLY SO LITTLE
OF A PROBLEM, HE HAD TO BORROW
FIFTY MIGRANTS FROM A STATE
HALFWAY ACROSS THE COUNTRY.
STILL, CREDIT WHERE IT'S DUE:
NOTHING SAYS "I'M AGAINST
ILLEGAL IMMIGRATION AND HUMAN
TRAFFICKING" QUITE LIKE MAKING
FAKE DOCUMENTS TO SMUGGLE PEOPLE
ACROSS A BORDER.
AND LOOK: WE COULD SPEND THE
REST OF THIS SHOW TALKING ABOUT
DeSANTIS, AND WHY HE ALWAYS
LOOKS LIKE HE'S WEARING A SUIT
"UNDER" HIS SUIT.
BUT THERE'S ALSO AN URGENT
CRISIS GOING ON IN PUERTO RICO:
>> THIS MORNING, PUERTO RICO IN
THE DARK AFTER POWERFUL WINDS
FROM FIONA KNOCKED OUT POWER TO
NEARLY EVERYONE ON THE ISLAND.
>> IN UTUADO IN THE CENTER OF
THE ISLAND, THIS NEW METAL
BRIDGE, BUILT JUST FOUR YEARS
AGO AFTER HURRICANE MARIA, WAS
SWEPT AWAY LIKE A TWIG.
>> John: HOLY SHIT.
THAT'S DEVASTATING.
WHEN YOU HEAR THAT SOMETHING HAS
BEEN "SWEPT AWAY LIKE A TWIG,"
YOU EXPECT THAT SOMETHING TO BE
TIMOTHEE CHALAMET IN A LIGHT
BREEZE, NOT A LARGE PIECE OF
INFRASTRUCTURE IN A RIVER.
ONE REMARKABLE THING ABOUT THE
CURRENT DEVASTATION IN
PUERTO RICO IS THAT, WHILE IT'S
REMINISCENT OF WHAT HAPPENED
THERE FIVE YEARS AGO WITH
HURRICANE MARIA, THAT MADE
LANDFALL AS A CATEGORY 4 STORM,
WHEREAS HURRICANE FIONA WAS JUST
A CATEGORY 1.
AND THAT SPEAKS TO THE FACT THAT
THE RECOVERY FROM MARIA HAS BEEN
A COMPLETE SHAMBLES, FROM THE
MOMENT TRUMP FLUNG PAPER TOWELS
AT PEOPLE, TO RIGHT NOW.
THERE'VE BEEN UNFORGIVABLE
DELAYS IN STRENGTHENING
INFRASTRUCTURE LIKE THE POWER
GRID, DESPITE BILLIONS OF
FEDERAL DOLLARS BEING ALLOCATED
TO IT.
AND ABOUT THE POWER GRID: AFTER
YEARS OF MISMANAGEMENT BY THE
ISLAND'S PUBLICLY-OWNED UTILITY,
IN 2021, A PRIVATE COMPANY
CALLED LUMA ENERGY TOOK OVER
OPERATIONS.
BUT INCREDIBLY, SINCE THEN,
THINGS HAVE MANAGED TO GET EVEN
WORSE.
NOT ONLY ARE OUTAGES NOW LONGER,
AT ONE POINT A HOSPITAL LOST
POWER FOR SIXTEEN HOURS.
AND THAT WAS DURING NORMAL
WEATHER.
AS FOR THE HEAD OF LUMA, IN A
CONGRESSIONAL HEARING LAST YEAR,
HE DIDN'T SEEM ESPECIALLY
CONCERNED ABOUT HOW THINGS WERE
GOING.
>> HOW WOULD YOU CHARACTERIZE
LUMA'S TRANSITION TO MANAGING
PUERTO RICO'S ELECTRICAL GRID SO
FAR, WITH 1 BEING A TOTAL
DISASTER AND 10 BEING A
REMARKABLE SUCCESS?
>> WHEN I LOOK AT IT ON BALANCE,
I -- I WOULD GIVE US, Y'KNOW, A
"B".
I THINK WE HAVE A LOT TO DO.
>> OK, SO 1-10, 1-10, YOU WOULD
GIVE YOURSELF LIKE A 6?
>> I'D GIVE MYSELF -- I'D GIVE
US A 7.
>> A 7, OKAY.
HOW MANY BLACKOUTS HAVE BEEN
REPORTED SINCE LUMA TOOK OVER ON
JUNE 1?
>> UHHHH... THE SYSTEM HAS A
VERY LARGE NUMBER OF OUTAGES,
CONGRESSWOMAN.
BOTH BEFORE AND AFTER--
>> CAN YOU COUNT THEM?
IS IT SO BIG YOU CAN'T EVEN KEEP
TRACK OF THEM ALL?
>> UHH, THERE ARE OUTAGES EVERY
SINGLE DAY.
>> John: OKAY, THAT'S A TERRIBLE
ANSWER.
FIRST, YOU ABSOLUTELY "SHOULD"
BE KEEPING TRACK OF THE OUTAGES
HAPPENING ON YOUR WATCH.
SECOND, THE QUESTION WAS BASED
ON A SCALE OF ONE TO TEN AND YOU
ANSWERED "B."
AND FINALLY: A SEVEN OUT OF TEN
WOULD BE A 70% GRADE, BUT THAT'S
ACTUALLY A "C-MINUS."
SO IF I WERE TO GRADE YOUR
ABILITY TO GRADE YOURSELF, I'D
GIVE YOU A TWO OUT OF TEN, WHICH
-- FOR THE RECORD -- IS AN "F."
HONESTLY, I DON'T KNOW WHY YOU
DIDN'T JUST LEAVE THE ZOOM
IMMEDIATELY AND BLAME IT ON A
BLACKOUT.
AFTER ALL, YOU'RE THE CEO OF
LUMA ENERGY, IT WOULD'VE BEEN
ENTIRELY BELIEVABLE.
AND WHILE LUMA'S REPEATEDLY
PROMISED OVER THE LAST YEAR THAT
THINGS ARE IMPROVING, EVEN
BEFORE FIONA HIT, THERE WERE
SIGNS OF TROUBLE.
JUST LOOK WHAT HAPPENED WHEN THE
GOVERNOR, PEDRO PIERLUISI SPOKE
TO DISCUSS PLANS FOR THE COMING
STORM.
YOU DON'T NEED TO KNOW WHAT HE'S
SAYING HERE -- YOU JUST NEED TO
WATCH WHAT HAPPENS.
>> [SPEAKING NON-ENGLISH
LANGUAGE]
>> John: NOT GREAT.
I DON'T KNOW WHAT'S WORSE, THE
FACT THE POWER WENT OUT IN THE
MIDDLE OF HIS PRESS CONFERENCE
ABOUT STORM PREPAREDNESS, OR THE
FACT THAT NO ONE IN THE ROOM
SEEMED THAT SURPRISED.
THE ONLY WAY THAT COULD'VE BEEN
MORE OMINOUS IS IF, WHEN THE
LIGHTS CAME BACK ON MICHAEL
MYERS WAS STANDING RIGHT BEHIND
HIM.
PEOPLE HAVE BEEN UNDERSTANDABLY
FURIOUS FOR A WHILE NOW.
THERE'VE BEEN STREET PROTESTS
WITH PEOPLE MAKING PROTEST SIGNS
OUT OF APPLIANCES THAT WERE
RUINED DURING POWER SURGES.
AND JUST WATCH THIS REACTION AT
A BAD BUNNY CONCERT IN SAN JUAN,
WHEN HE CALLED LUMA OUT.
>> LUMA CAN GO TO HELL.
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]
>> John: WOW.
IT SAYS A LOT ABOUT HOW MUCH
PEOPLE HATE THAT COMPANY, THAT
THAT ELICITED THE KIND OF CROWD
RESPONSE YOU'D NORMALLY EXPECT
WHEN SOMEONE ANNOUNCES SOMETHING
LIKE, "EVERYONE GETS A FREE
CAR!"
OR "HENRY KISSINGER HAS DIED!"
BAD BUNNY'S ACTUALLY BEEN TRYING
TO DRAW ATTENTION TO PUERTO
RICO'S PROBLEMS FOR A WHILE NOW.
IN FACT, JUST LAST FRIDAY, HE
RELEASED A NEW MUSIC VIDEO FOR
HIS SONG, "EL APAGON," WHICH
LITERALLY TRANSLATES TO
"THE BLACKOUT."
BUT AROUND A MINUTE INTO THE
VIDEO, THERE'S A PRETTY
SIGNIFICANT TONAL SHIFT.
♪ ♪
>> PUERTO RICO KEEPS STRUGGLING
WITH POWER OUTAGES THAT ARE
LEAVING DOZENS OF THOUSANDS OF
PEOPLE WITHOUT ELECTRICITY.
THIS EXPLOSION LEFT THE ENTIRE
COUNTRY WITHOUT ELECTRICITY BACK
IN APRIL.
>> John: YEAH, BAD BUNNY SUCKERS
YOU IN WITH A SONG, AND THEN
HITS YOU WITH, AND THIS IS TRUE,
A TWENTY-MINUTE DEEP DIVE
DOCUMENTARY FEATURING THE
REPORTING OF A LOCAL
INVESTIGATIVE JOURNALIST.
AND IT'S LEGITIMATELY WELL DONE
-- THERE'S INFOGRAPHICS OF
DONATIONS TO POLITICIANS, AND AN
EXPLANATION OF ACT 22, THE
PUERTO RICAN LAW THAT LURES
WEALTHY INVESTORS TO THE ISLAND
WITH THE PROMISE OF NO CAPITAL
GAINS TAXES.
HONESTLY, THE VIDEO'S SORT OF
LIKE THIS SHOW, WHERE YOU THINK
YOU'RE GETTING SOMETHING FUN
BEFORE GETTING TRICKED INTO,
ESSENTIALLY, WATCHING HOMEWORK
THE TELEVISION SHOW.
ALSO LIKE BAD BUNNY, I TOO AM
YOUNG AND HOT.
I'M YOUNG AND I'M HOT AND GOING
PLACES, LIKE MY PEER, BAD BUNNY.
WE'RE MORE SIMILAR THAN
DIFFERENT.
THE POINT IS, PEOPLE IN PUERTO
RICO ARE JUSTIFIABLY FED UP, AND
ARE MAKING IT VERY CLEAR THAT
THEY'RE NOT GOING TO STAND FOR
THIS MUCH LONGER.
>> YOU KNOW THAT IF LUMA ENERGY
DOESN'T DO WHAT IT SHOULD BE
DOING, IT BETTER GET READY.
BECAUSE PUERTO RICANS ARE NICE
PEOPLE, BUT WHEN WE GET IRATE,
YOU BETTER SCRAMBLE TO BOARD A
PLANE AND SAY "BYE-BYE".
>> John: EXACTLY.
AND LOOK: IF I'M THE HEAD OF
LUMA, I DON'T KNOW EXACTLY HOW
NERVOUS I SHOULD BE RIGHT NOW,
BUT ON A SCALE OF ONE TO TEN,
I'D PROBABLY SAY "A SHITLOAD."
AND NOW THIS.
>> AND NOW: THE QUEUE TO END ALL
QUEUES.
>> IN LONDON PEOPLE ARE
CONTINUING TO QUEUE FOR HOURS TO
PAY THEIR RESPECTS TO THE QUEEN
WHO'S LYING IN A STATE AT
WESTMINSTER HOLD.
>> THE LATE QUEEN HAS DONE US
PROUD.
SHE'S BROUGHT THE COUNTRY
TOGETHER, SHE'S BROUGHT TOGETHER
THE BEST BRITISH OF ALL TIME.
TO SPEAK OF WHAT I LOVE ABOUT
THE Q IT'S A GREAT EQUALIZER.
>> YOUR JOB, CLASS, AGE, YOUR
STATUS, YOU LINE UP WITH YOUR
FELLOW BRITS.
>> WE DIDN'T USED TO BE GOOD AT
QUEUING, WE WERE FAMOUS FOR
RIOTING AND CUTTING PEOPLE'S
HEADS OFF.
>> IT'S BECOME A GIGANTIC HUMAN
SNAKE.
>> SO MANY PEOPLE TURNED UP TO
PAY TO TRIBUTE.
>> IF DON'T PEOPLE FEEL THE URGE
TO QUEUE, WHAT DOES IT SAY ABOUT
THEM?
>> THIS IS THE QUEUE OF ALL
QUEUE'S.
>> IT'S THE QUEUE TO END ALL
QUEUE.
>> NO INTENTION OF JOINING THE
QUEUE, YOU JUST GOT SUCKED INTO
WEIGHT AND SUCH IS THE
SEDUCTIVENESS OF THE QUEUE.
>> John: MOVING ON.
OUR MAIN STORY TONIGHT CONCERNS
BRAZIL.
THE ONLY COUNTRY WHOSE FLAG LETS
A LITTLE CIRCLE WEAR A FANCY
SASH.
ISN'T THAT NICE?
THE CIRCLE IS ALL DRESSED UP FOR
ITS BIG DAY BEING ON THE FLAG.
BRAZIL'S ONE OF THE LARGEST
DEMOCRACIES IN THE WORLD, WITH
MORE THAN 156 MILLION PEOPLE
ELIGIBLE TO VOTE.
AND NEXT SUNDAY, IT'S HAVING A
MASSIVE ELECTION.
WE'VE MENTIONED BRAZIL'S
ELECTIONS ON THE SHOW BEFORE,
PARTLY BECAUSE CAMPAIGN ADS
THERE CAN BE SPECTACULAR, LIKE
THIS ONE, FOR A MAN CURRENTLY
RUNNING FOR STATE DEPUTY:
>> I'M SAMURAI TAXI DRIVER: YOU
CAN FIND ME AROUND PERNAMBUCO.
10554.
♪ ♪
>> John: FANTASTIC.
I DON'T KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT
NUNCHUCKS.
I DON'T KNOW IF THEY'RE
HISTORICALLY A PART OF SAMURAI
TAXI DRIVER CULTURE.
AND I DON'T KNOW IF USING YOUR
ARMPIT SO MUCH IS USUALLY A PART
OF IT.
BUT I WILL SAY, I'M IMPRESSED HE
SPENT SO MUCH TIME LEARNING TO
USE THEM, BUT ZERO TIME LEARNING
HOW TO EDIT OUT THE PART OF THE
VIDEO WHERE HE TURNS HIS PHONE
OFF.
MANY ELECTED POSITIONS ARE ON
THE BALLOT IN BRAZIL NEXT
SUNDAY, FROM GOVERNORS TO
SENATORS.
BUT THE KEY ONE IS THE OFFICE OF
PRESIDENT, WHERE JAIR BOLSONARO
IS RUNNING FOR REELECTION.
YOU MAY REMEMBER, FOUR YEARS
AGO, WE ACTUALLY DISCUSSED HIS
FIRST PRESIDENTIAL RUN.
I ASSUME.
I DON'T WATCH THIS SHOW.
BUT IF YOU MISSED IT:
BOLSONARO'S A RIGHT-WING
EX-MILITARY POPULIST WHO, WHEN
IN CONGRESS, TOLD A FEMALE
COLLEAGUE, "I WOULDN'T RAPE YOU,
YOU'RE NOT WORTH IT," HAS SAID
"I WOULD PREFER MY SON TO DIE IN
AN ACCIDENT" THAN TO HAVE HIM BE
GAY, AND LOVES MAKING FINGER
GUNS ALL THE FUCKING TIME.
BASICALLY, HE CAMPAIGNED AS A
MISOGYNISTIC HOMOPHOBE WHO
GESTURES LIKE HE RUNS A TECH
STARTUP.
BUT NOW HE'S CAMPAIGNING AS AN
INCUMBENT PRESIDENT, AND HE'S
BEEN DRAWING ON ALL THE PERKS OF
THE OFFICE -- INCLUDING RECENTLY
TURNING THE 200TH ANNIVERSARY OF
BRAZILIAN INDEPENDENCE INTO A
CAMPAIGN RALLY FOR HIMSELF.
>> HIS RALLY IN BRAZIL'S CAPITAL
CITY BRASILIA DREW TENS OF
THOUSANDS OF SUPPORTERS, AND A
MILITARY DISPLAY OF PLANES,
PARACHUTISTS, AND TANKS.
EVEN THE EMBALMED HEART OF
MONARCH DOM PEDRO I, WHO
DECLARED BRAZIL'S INDEPENDENCE
FROM PORTUGAL 200 YEARS AGO.
WAS BROUGHT OVER FROM EUROPE TO
BE ON DISPLAY.
>> John: WOW.
FIRST, IF YOU WERE WONDERING
WHAT DOM PEDRO THE FIRST DIED
OF, IT WAS PROBABLY HIS HEART
LOOKING LIKE THAT.
BUT IT'S TRUE -- THEY PUT A
TWO-CENTURY-OLD HEART ON AN AIR
FORCE PLANE AND FLEW IT TO
BRAZIL.
IT'S ACTUALLY THE FIRST
UNNATURALLY PRESERVED HUMAN BODY
PART TO FLY ON A MILITARY JET
SINCE ALL OF TOM CRUISE.
BOLSONARO'S MAIN OPPONENT IS
FORMER PRESIDENT, LUIZ INACIO
LULA DA SILVA.
HE WAS INCREDIBLY POPULAR IN
OFFICE, BUT LATER GOT CAUGHT UP
IN THE INTERNATIONAL CORRUPTION
INVESTIGATION "OPERATION CAR
WASH," EVEN LANDING IN PRISON
DURING BRAZIL'S LAST ELECTION.
BUT HIS CONVICTION'S SINCE BEEN
ANNULLED, AND POLLS NOW
CONSISTENTLY SHOW HIM LEADING
THE RACE BY A WIDE MARGIN --
ABOUT 10%.
BUT THE CONCERNS IN BRAZIL ARE
THAT IF, AS SEEMS LIKELY,
BOLSONARO LOSES, HE WON'T GIVE
UP HIS OFFICE WITHOUT A FIGHT,
AND COULD EVEN "FOLLOW TRUMP'S
EXAMPLE IN ENCOURAGING
SUPPORTERS TO BACK A "TROPICAL
VERSION" OF THE CAPITOL RIOT."
WHICH ISN'T GREAT.
ALTHOUGH -- FOR THE RECORD --
YOU REALLY DON'T HAVE TO USE THE
WORD "TROPICAL" TO DESCRIBE AN
INSURRECTION JUST BECAUSE YOU'RE
TALKING ABOUT LATIN AMERICA.
ESPECIALLY BECAUSE "TROPICAL
RIOT" SOUNDS LIKE A MOUNTAIN DEW
FLAVOR THAT WAS RECALLED FOR
BLINDING SEVERAL CHILDREN.
AND BOLSONARO'S VERSION OF
JANUARY 6 COULD BE A LOT MORE
DESTRUCTIVE THAN TRUMP'S, GIVEN
THAT HE'S DONE A LOT TO
CULTIVATE SUPPORT WITHIN THE
MILITARY.
WHICH MAKES IT MORE THAN A
LITTLE CONCERNING WHEN HE STANDS
IN FRONT OF HIS SUPPORTERS AND
SAYS THINGS LIKE THIS:
>> THERE ARE ONLY THREE
ALTERNATIVES FOR ME:
TO BE ARRESTED, TO BE KILLED, OR
TO BE VICTORIOUS.
AND I TELL THOSE SCUMBAGS, I
WILL NEVER GO TO JAIL.
>> John: OKAY, THAT'S NEVER A
GOOD OMEN.
NO ONE SAYS THAT BEFORE DOING
SOMETHING PLEASANT.
NO ONE SAYS THEIR OPTIONS ARE
"VICTORY, PRISON OR DEATH"
BEFORE THEY, SAY, MARCH INTO
"THE GREAT BRITISH BAKE OFF"
TENT FOR BISCUIT WEEK.
NOT EVEN THE GERMAN GUY, AND
HONESTLY, I WAS KIND OF
EXPECTING THAT FROM HIM.
THE FIRST ROUND OF THE ELECTION
IS NEXT SUNDAY, AND IF NO ONE
WINS MORE THAN 50% OF THE VOTE,
IT'LL GO TO A SECOND ROUND ON
OCTOBER 30 -- ALTHOUGH,
WORRYINGLY, BOLSONARO HAS SAID
THAT IF HE DOESN'T WIN OUTRIGHT
NEXT SUNDAY, RECEIVING AT LEAST
60% OF THE VOTES, SOMETHING
QUOTE "ABNORMAL" TOOK PLACE.
SO IF ONE OF THE WORLD'S BIGGEST
DEMOCRACIES SEEMS LIKE IT MIGHT
BE BARRELING TOWARDS A CLIFF,
TONIGHT, LET'S TALK ABOUT JAIR
BOLSONARO, THE MAN WITH HIS FOOT
PLANTED FIRMLY ON THE GAS.
AND LET'S START WITH THE FACT
THAT, UNFORTUNATELY, HE'S
GOVERNED PRETTY MUCH EXACTLY HOW
HE SAID HE WAS GOING TO.
HE'S FOLLOWED THROUGH ON A BIG
CAMPAIGN PROMISE TO MAKE GUNS
MORE FREELY AVAILABLE IN BRAZIL,
LOOSENING GUN LAWS TO THE POINT
THAT, SINCE HE TOOK OFFICE, THE
NUMBER OF GUNS IN PRIVATE HANDS
HAS DOUBLED TO NEARLY 2 MILLION,
DESPITE POLLS SHOWING THE
MAJORITY OF BRAZILIANS ARE
AGAINST MAKING THE SALE AND
POSSESSION OF WEAPONS EASIER.
SO HE'S GIVING PEOPLE SOMETHING
THEY DIDN'T ASK FOR AND DON'T
WANT.
WHICH I BELIEVE IS ALSO THE JOB
DESCRIPTION FOR THE HEAD OF
ORIGINAL PROGRAMMING AT NETFLIX.
BUT MUCH MORE THAN THAT,
BOLSONARO'S BEEN AN ABSOLUTE
DISASTER FOR THE AMAZON, A
RAINFOREST THAT'S CRITICAL FOR
BRAZIL AND, Y'KNOW, THE PLANET.
HE'S LOOSENED REGULATIONS TO
EXPAND LOGGING AND MINING THERE,
AND MASSIVELY SCALED BACK
PROTECTIONS AND ENFORCEMENT.
AND ALMOST IMMEDIATELY AFTER HE
TOOK OFFICE, CONDITIONS
DETERIORATED.
>> UNDER BOLSONARO,
DEFORESTATION IS AT ITS HIGHEST
POINT IN A DECADE, WITH AN AREA
10 TIMES THE SIZE OF NEW YORK
CITY DESTROYED THROUGH OCTOBER
THIS YEAR.
AND IN AUGUST, THERE WAS AN
AVERAGE OF 1,000 FIRES EVERY
DAY.
>> John: WOW, A THOUSAND FIRES A
DAY.
THAT IS SO MANY FIRES!
IF YOU ASKED ME WHAT HAPPENS IN
THE AMAZON A THOUSAND TIMES A
DAY, MY FIRST GUESS WOULD BE
CAPYBARAS FUCKING.
SELF EXPLANATORY.
MY SECOND WOULD BE FROG BIRTHDAY
PARTIES.
STATISTICALLY, THERE'S GOTTA BE
AT LEAST 5000 OF THEM
WITH A BIRTHDAY EVERY DAY AND WE
HAVE TO ASSUME THAT SOME COMBINE
PARTIES FOR CONVENIENCE AND
OTHERS JUST DIDN'T WANT TO HAVE
A BIG THING THIS YEAR.
BUT EXACTLY ZERO OF MY GUESSES
WOULD BE 'FIRES'.
THESE FIRES ARE OFTEN PART OF
ILLEGAL DEFORESTATION, TO CLEAR
AREAS FOR INDUSTRIAL USES --
DEFORESTATION, INCIDENTALLY,
WHICH CAN ENCROACH ON LAND WHERE
INDIGENOUS PEOPLE LIVE.
AND THEY'VE BEEN FORCED TO
CONFRONT THESE LOGGERS,
RANCHERS, AND MINERS ON THEIR
OWN, WHICH CAN BE BOTH VERY
DANGEROUS, AND DEEPLY
DISPIRITING.
>> WHEN WE CONFRONT THEM THEY
SAY, "DON'T YOU WATCH THE NEWS?
BOLSONARO SAID THAT WHEN HE WON
WE COULD TAKE WOOD FROM
INDIGENOUS LAND."
THIS IS WHAT THEY SAY TO US.
>> John: RIGHT.
IT'S GOT TO BE TOUGH TO FIGHT
SOMEONE TAKING YOUR STUFF WHEN
THEY'VE ESSENTIALLY GOT
PERMISSION FROM THE MOST
POWERFUL PERSON IN THE COUNTRY.
IF I STOLE YOUR WALLETS AND THEN
PLAYED A CLIP OF BIDEN SAYING,
"I ENCOURAGE YOU TO ROB YOUR
AUDIENCE MEMBERS, JOHN.
NOW I GOTTA GO, I NEED TO GO SAY
TEN WRONG THINGS IN A ROW ON '60
MINUTES,'" THERE WOULDN'T BE
MUCH YOU COULD DO.
THE POINT IS, THE DESTRUCTION OF
THE AMAZON UNDER BOLSONARO HAS
BEEN DEVASTATING.
IN FACT, WHILE WORLDWIDE
GREENHOUSE GAS EMISSIONS
PLUMMETED BY ALMOST 7% IN 2020,
DUE TO THE PANDEMIC, BRAZIL'S
EMISSIONS ACTUALLY GREW BY
NEARLY 10%.
AND BOLSONARO'S ADDED INSULT TO
INJURY, CLAIMING THOSE FIRES IN
THE AMAZON WERE FALSE FLAGS,
ACCUSING OUTSIDERS OF BEING PART
OF A NEFARIOUS PLOT TO SEIZE
BRAZIL'S JUNGLES, AND DIRECTLY
ACCUSING LEONARDO DICAPRIO OF
FUNDING ARSON IN THE AMAZON.
WHICH IS ABSURD!
WHERE WOULD LEO FIND THE TIME TO
DO THAT BETWEEN HIS BUSY FILM
SCHEDULE, HIS DAILY YACHT FUCK,
AND HAVING A BIG LAUGH AT EVERY
TWEET ABOUT HIS MAY DECEMEBER
LOVE LIFE.
"MAN, THE INTERNET GOT ME
AGAIN!"
LEO SHOUTS TO THE RICHEST PEOPLE
ON THE PLANET OVER A BOTTLE OF
WINE THAT COSTS MORE THAN YOUR
RENT.
BUT PERHAPS THE DEFINING
CATASTROPHE OF BOLSONARO'S
PRESIDENCY HAS BEEN HIS HANDLING
OF THE COVID PANDEMIC.
BRAZIL HAS SUFFERED MASSIVELY --
OVER 34 MILLION CASES, AND OVER
685,000 DEATHS.
AND RIGHT FROM THE START, HE
REFUSED TO TAKE IT SERIOUSLY,
INITIALLY DISMISSING COVID AS "A
LITTLE FLU," AND THEN, ONCE THE
DEATH TOLL STARTED RISING,
SHRUGGING OFF RESPONSIBILITY IN
THE MOST DICKISH POSSIBLE WAY.
>> EVERYTHING IS ABOUT THE
PANDEMIC NOWADAYS.
WE HAVE GOT TO STOP WITH THIS.
I'M SORRY FOR THE DEAD.
I'M SORRY, BUT WE'RE ALL GOING
TO DIE ONE DAY.
EVERYBODY HERE IS GOING TO DIE.
WE HAVE TO STOP BEING A COUNTRY
OF SISSIES.
>> John: WOW.
THAT IS MONUMENTALLY SHITTY.
I GOTTA SAY -- AMERICA'S COVID
RESPONSE LEFT A LOT TO BE
DESIRED, BUT AT LEAST THE CDC'S
SLOGAN WAS NEVER "WHAT ARE YOU
COMPLAINING ABOUT, DEATH COMES
FOR ALL OF US, MAN UP AND DIE IN
A HOLE."
BUT BOLSONARO DIDN'T JUST
ABDICATE RESPONSIBILITY FOR
FIGHTING COVID, HE ACTIVELY MADE
IT WORSE, ATTACKING GOVERNORS
AND ANYONE ELSE WHO PROMOTED
SHUTDOWNS OR SOCIAL DISTANCING.
IN FACT, TO THE EXTENT THAT
LOCKDOWN ORDERS WERE ISSUED AT
ALL IN BRAZILIAN CITIES, THEY
SOMETIMES CAME FROM VERY
SURPRISING PLACES.
>> THE SITUATION HAS BECOME SO
SERIOUS THAT THE DRUG GANGS THAT
RULE THIS SLUM AND OTHER SLUMS
IN RIO DE JANEIRO HAVE DECREED A
LOCKDOWN, AND THEY HAVE
FORBIDDEN ALL CLANDESTINE
PARTIES FROM HAPPENING.
>> John: IT'S TRUE!
DRUG GANGS ENDED UP BEING MORE
RESPONSIBLE WHEN IT CAME TO
COVID THAN THE BRAZILIAN
GOVERNMENT!
ALTHOUGH, LET'S NOT GIVE THEM
TOO MUCH CREDIT FOR BANNING
PARTIES -- YOU KNOW WHAT'S
PRETTY APPEALING WHEN YOU'RE
STUCK INSIDE WITH NOTHING TO DO
AND NOWHERE TO GO?
DRUGS.
AND WHAT'S SO FRUSTRATING IS
THAT BRAZIL WAS
BETTER-POSITIONED THAN MANY
OTHER COUNTRIES TO HANDLE COVID.
IT HAS A LONG HISTORY OF
SUCCESSFUL INOCULATION DRIVES,
STARRING THEIR BELOVED VACCINE
MASCOT, ZE GOTINHA, WHO, AT
BEST, LOOKS LIKE A SUPER SPERM
AND AT WORST, A KLAN MEMBER ALL
DRESSED UP FOR JAZZERCISE.
AND YET, BOLSONARO NOT ONLY
SOWED DOUBTS ABOUT THE EFFICACY
OF VACCINES, HE DELAYED ORDERING
DOSES FOR MONTHS.
IN FACT, LAST YEAR, PFIZER
APPARENTLY REACHED OUT TO THE
BRAZILIAN GOVERNMENT 81 TIMES,
TRYING TO SET UP A DEAL TO
PROVIDE DOSES OF VACCINES, BUT
MOST OF THE TIME GOT NO ANSWER.
AND SOME OF THOSE EMAILS FROM
PFIZER WERE JUST SAD.
ONE READ: HOPE ALL IS WELL WITH
YOU!
I JUST WANTED TO CONFIRM THAT
YOU RECEIVED YESTERDAY A
COMMUNICATION SENT ON BEHALF OF
THE PRESIDENT OF PFIZER, WITH
THE UPDATED PROPOSAL OF A
POSSIBLE SUPPLY OF COVID-19
VACCINES.
WILL YOU LET ME KNOW?"
AND COME ON, PFIZER!
IF YOU'RE GETTING GHOSTED, YOU
GOTTA BE MORE BLUNT THAN THAT.
SOMETHING LIKE "ATTENTION
DICKHEADS: YOUR COUNTRY HAS
COVID, WE HAVE A VACCINE, LET'S
DO THIS THING."
OR EVEN: "EARTH TO PRESIDENT
BITCH: STOP SUBTWEETING LEONARDO
DICAPRIO AND ANSWER YOUR FUCKING
PHONE."
AND THE THING IS, IT'S NOT LIKE
BRAZILIANS DIDN'T WANT VACCINES
-- PROVEN BY THE FACT THAT, ONCE
THEY FINALLY BECAME AVAILABLE,
VIRTUALLY 100% OF THE ADULT
POPULATIONS IN RIO AND SAO PAULO
GOT FULLY VACCINATED, A NUMBER
NO AMERICAN CITY HAS HIT.
AND THE COVID DEBACLE WOULD BE
ENOUGH FOR PEOPLE TO BE DONE
WITH BOLSONARO, BUT THERE'S SO
MUCH MORE -- FROM HIS OPEN
DESPITE RUNNING ON AN
ANTICORRUPTION PLATFORM, THEY'VE
BEEN, ENGULFED IN A GROWING
NUMBER OF GRAMM CRIMINAL
INVESTIGATIONS.
INCLUDING, AT ONE POINT,
THREATENING TO PUNCH A REPORTER
IN THE FACE, TO THE FACT THAT,
DESPITE RUNNING ON AN
ANTI-CORRUPTION PLATFORM FOUR
YEARS AGO, HE'S NOW HAD MULTIPLE
ALLEGATIONS LEVELED AGAINST HIM
AND HIS FAMILY.
IT'S NO WONDER HE'S TRAILING IN
THE POLLS.
WHICH IS NOT TO SAY THAT
BOLSONARO DOESN'T HAVE
SUPPORTERS -- BECAUSE HE DOES,
AND THEY CAN BE INTENSE.
>> THOUSANDS OF SUPPORTERS LINED
UP IN FRONT OF THIS GYM NEXT TO
RIO DE JANEIRO'S ICONIC MARACAÃA
FOOTBALL STADIUM.
INSIDE, CROWDS WEARING THE
COLORS OF THE BRAZILIAN FLAG
CHEER FOR PRESIDENT JAIR
BOLSONARO, CALLING HIM THE
MESSIAH AND THE MYTH.
>> John: I LOVE THAT MAN.
I LOVE HIS OUTFIT.
I LOVE HIS FACEPAINT.
I LOVE THE WAY HE KIND OF LOOKS
LIKE THE HULK LOSING HIS SHIT AT
A GREEN BAY PACKERS GAME.
BUT WHAT I LOVE MOST OF ALL IS
WHAT APPEARS TO BE A SECURITY
GUARD OVER HIS SHOULDER,
SCANNING THE CROWD FOR THREATS,
WHILE LOOKING EVERYWHERE BUT
AT THE BRIGHT GREEN MAN IN FRONT
OF HIM, SCREAMING SO HARD HE
MIGHT EXPLODE.
AND BOLSONARO'S BEEN VERY
DELIBERATELY LAYING THE
GROUNDWORK WITH HIS SUPPORTERS
FOR AN EVENTUAL TRUMP-STYLE
REFUSAL TO ACCEPT THE ELECTION
RESULTS -- EVEN POINTING TO OUR
LAST ELECTION AS A CAUTIONARY
TALE FOR BRAZILIANS.
>> WHAT HAPPENED IN THE AMERICAN
ELECTIONS.
BASICALLY, THE PROBLEM, THE
CAUSE OF THIS CRISIS WAS THE
LACK OF TRUST IN THE VOTE.
>> THERE WERE PEOPLE WHO VOTED
3, 4 TIMES.
DEAD PEOPLE VOTED.
IT WAS A MESS.
>> John: GREAT, SO THAT'S THE
JANUARY 6TH OP-ED ABSOLUTELY NO
ONE NEEDED, FROM THE MAN NO ONE
WANTED TO HEAR IT FROM, AND FROM
THE CAMERA ANGLE ABSOLUTELY NO
ONE DESERVES.
HE'S SAYING HIS STUPID OPINIONS
OUT LOUD, YOU REALLY DON'T HAVE
TO GO HUNTING FOR THEM RIGHT UP
HIS NOSTRILS.
BOLSONARO'S BEEN GOING OUT OF
HIS WAY TO UNDERMINE FAITH IN
BRAZIL'S ELECTION SYSTEM,
SUGGESTING JUDGES AND OFFICIALS
ARE TRYING TO SABOTAGE HIS
REELECTION, AND FEARMONGERING
ABOUT THE COUNTRY'S ELECTRONIC
VOTING MACHINES -- MACHINES,
INCIDENTALLY, WHICH ARE EVEN THE
SUBJECT OF ASMR ELECTION PSA'S
LIKE THIS ONE:
>> ELECTRONIC BALLOT BOX ASMR.
DO YOU STILL HAVE QUESTIONS
ABOUT THE ELECTIONS?
WE'RE HERE TO MAKE THINGS
SIMPLE.
AND TODAY'S QUESTION IS: WHY
VOTE?
>> John: HORNY.
YOU KNOW, EVERY DAY THERE ARE
MILLIONS OF PEOPLE EXPERIENCING
THEIR OWN PERSONAL SEXUAL
AWAKENINGS, AND I'M GUESSING
TODAY AT LEAST ONE OF THEM
DISCOVERED THAT SOFTLY FONDLING
BRAZILIAN VOTING MACHINES IS
APPARENTLY THEIR THING.
WELCOME TO THE REST OF YOUR
LIFE.
BUT BRAZIL'S VOTING MACHINES
AREN'T JUST QUIETLY EROTIC,
THEY'RE ALSO WIDELY SEEN AS
SECURE.
THEY ARE NOT CONNECTED TO THE
INTERNET, WHICH MAKES THEM ALL
BUT IMPOSSIBLE TO HACK.
AND IT'S WORTH KNOWING THAT,
SINCE THEIR INTRODUCTION IN
1996, AUTHORITIES HAVE NEVER
FOUND ANY EVIDENCE OF WIDESPREAD
FRAUD.
YET BOLSANARO'S REPEATEDLY
ATTACKED THE MACHINES AS
CROOKED, CLAIMING HIS MARGIN OF
VICTORY IN 2018 ACTUALLY SHOULD
HAVE BEEN LARGER.
HE EVEN SUBJECTED A ROOM FULL OF
DIPLOMATS TO A 45-MINUTE
POWERPOINT PRESENTATION ACCUSING
BRAZIL'S ELECTIONS OF BEING
RIGGED.
AND THAT'S INCREDIBLY DANGEROUS,
PARTLY BECAUSE PEOPLE WILL AGREE
TO ANYTHING IF YOU THREATEN THEM
WITH A 45-MINUTE POWERPOINT
PRESENTATION.
IN OUR OFFICE, WE HAVE AN EMAIL
SECURITY SEMINAR ONCE A YEAR,
AND THIS YEAR I BROKE MY LAPTOP
WITH A HAMMER JUST SO I COULD
CLAIM IT DIDN'T APPLY TO ME.
IT WAS THE RIGHT CALL AND I'D DO
IT AGAIN.
AND LOOK: I DON'T WANT TO WASTE
TIME KNOCKING DOWN EVERY ONE OF
BOLSONARO'S COMPLAINTS, BECAUSE
IT'S PRETTY CLEAR THAT IN
RAISING THESE OBJECTIONS IN THE
RUN-UP TO THE ELECTION, HIS
INTENTION ISN'T TO MAXIMIZE THE
SECURITY OF THE VOTE, BUT TO
MAXIMIZE THE AMOUNT OF DISTRUST
THAT PEOPLE HAVE IN IT.
AND HIS SUPPORTERS HAVE BEEN
LISTENING TO HIS BULLSHIT.
>> IF THE ELECTIONS ARE FAIR, HE
WINS IN THE FIRST ROUND, ONLY IN
THE FIRST ROUND.
>> HE WILL ONLY LOSE THE
ELECTION IF THERE IS FRAUD, AND
THE PEOPLE WILL TAKE TO THE
STREETS TO STOP THAT FROM
HAPPENING.
>> John: SEE, THAT'S
INTERESTING, BECAUSE IF YOU LOOK
AT THAT MAN YOU'D THINK, "HE
LOVES BRAZIL."
BUT IF YOU "LISTEN" TO HIM,
YOU'D LEARN "HE'S WILLING TO
BURN HIS COUNTRY DOWN BASED ON A
FLIMSILY-LAID CONSPIRACY
THEORY."
BUT I GUESS THAT DUALITY IS JUST
PART OF THE BOUNDLESS MYSTERY
AND CONTRADICTION THAT MAKES
HUMAN BEINGS THE ABSOLUTE WORST.
AND GIVEN BOLSONARO'S RHETORIC,
IT'S NO WONDER THERE'VE ALREADY
BEEN OUTBREAKS OF VIOLENCE.
ONE LULA SUPPORTER WAS KILLED
WHEN A BOLSONARO SUPPORTER
INVADED HIS LULA-THEMED BIRTHDAY
PARTY AND SHOT HIM, WHILE
SHOUTING THAT "ALL PT
PARTISANS" -- THAT IS,
SUPPORTERS OF LULA'S POLITICAL
PARTY -- "WILL DIE."
SO THINGS ARE VERY TENSE RIGHT
NOW IN BRAZIL -- AND THAT'S
BEFORE YOU CONSIDER JUST HOW
CLOSE BOLSONARO IS TO THE ARMED
FORCES THERE.
NOT ONLY IS HE EX-MILITARY, AND
NOT ONLY HAS HE EXPRESSED
ADMIRATION FOR THE MILITARY
DICTATORSHIP THAT RAN THE
COUNTRY UNTIL 1985, HIS
GOVERNMENT IS ALSO HEAVILY
STOCKED WITH MILITARY PERSONNEL.
AND SOME LEADERS OF BRAZIL'S
ARMED FORCES ARE NOW ECHOING HIS
DOUBTS ABOUT THE INTEGRITY OF
THE ELECTIONS.
ALL OF WHICH HAS LED SOME IN
BRAZIL TO UNDERSTANDABLY WORRY
ABOUT WHAT LIES AHEAD.
>> THIS FLIRTING OF PRESIDENT
BOLSONARO WITH A COUP IS NOT A
RECENT THING IT'S AN OLD THING.
THE PEOPLE WHO SUPPORT HIM ARE
WILLING TO DO ANYTHING.
JUST LIKE THE SUPPORTERS OF
PRESIDENT DONALD TRUMP WHEN THE
CAPITOL WAS INVADED.
I HAVE NO DOUBT, I HAVE EVEN
WRITTEN ABOUT IT, THAT HERE IN
BRAZIL, WE WILL HAVE A TRAGIC,
DRAMATIC REPETITION OF WHAT
HAPPENED THERE.
>> John: YEAH, EXCEPT,
CRUCIALLY, IT COULD BE MUCH
WORSE THERE -- BECAUSE LUCKILY
FOR US, TRUMP'S ALLIES WERE
GENERALLY LIMITED TO A SHIRTLESS
MAN IN A FUR HAT, A
PERPETUALLY-HOARSE PILLOW BARON,
AND SOME OF HIS DUMBER CHILDREN.
BUT BOLSONARO HAS SIGNIFICANT
MILITARY SUPPORT, AND THERE IS
SOME QUESTION OF WHAT THEY MIGHT
DO IN THE EVENT OF AN UPRISING.
WHICH RAISES THE STAKES
SIGNIFICANTLY.
GENERALLY, WHEN SOMEONE
THREATENS DEMOCRACY IT'S A LOT
EASIER TO SAY "YOU AND WHAT
ARMY?"
WHEN YOU'RE ABSOLUTELY CERTAIN
THAT PERSON DOESN'T HAVE AN
ACTUAL ARMY BEHIND THEM.
THE POINT IS, FOR BRAZIL,
THERE'S A LOT ON THE LINE HERE.
AND RIGHT NOW, IT SEEMS THE MOST
LIKELY SCENARIO IS THAT NO ONE
WILL WIN OUTRIGHT NEXT SUNDAY,
MEANING BOTH BOLSONARO AND LULA
HEAD TO A RUN-OFF ON OCTOBER 30.
BUT THE WEEKS AHEAD COULD BE
EXTREMELY NERVE-RACKING.
AND THE FACT IS, IF BOLSONARO
EVENTUALLY LOSES AND CHOOSES TO
FIGHT THE RESULTS, IT'S GOING TO
TEST THE STRENGTH OF BRAZIL'S
RELATIVELY YOUNG DEMOCRACY.
SO TO THE PEOPLE THERE WHO ARE
WORRIED RIGHT NOW, LET ME
ADDRESS YOU IN THE TWO LANGUAGES
THAT I KNOW YOU'LL UNDERSTAND:
PORTUGUESE...
AND OF COURSE THE LANGUAGE OF
THE CHUCK.
SO PLEASE -- AND BEAR WITH ME.
OLA, BRASIL.
SOU O APRESENTADOR SAMURAI.
SINTO MUITO PELO QUE VOCES ESTAO
PASSANDO NESSE MOMENTO.
NOSSOS PENSAMENTOS ESTARAO COM
VOCES NAS PROXIMAS SEMANAS.
BOA SORTE.
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]
THAT'S OUR SHOW, THANK YOU SO
MUCH FOR WATCHING.
WE WILL SEE YOU NEXT WEEK.
GOOD NIGHT!
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]
♪ ♪