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(THEME MUSIC PLAYING)
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NARRATOR:
This is the city where danger
lurks around every corner.
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Wait.
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Wrong city.
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This is Paris, France.
Which is...
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Pretty nice, really.
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This is the city of our story.
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-(SIRENS BLARING IN DISTANCE)
-Where danger lurks
around every corner.
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No place for fun and games.
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(TRAIN HORN HONKS)
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(SMASHING)
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(GROWLS)
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NARRATOR: Ahem!
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This is some kind of research
for a case, right?
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Please tell me it's research
for a case.
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(NARRATOR SIGHS)
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Never mind, just train
your eyes on the door if you
wanna take on a real case.
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NARRATOR: Tom's always
on his toes when the client
is a delicate dame.
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(SLAMS)
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Well played, lover boy.
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That was no dame.
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It was just Red Herring
decked out in a pile of trash.
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Hmph! One man's trash
is another man's disguise.
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Eh, sorry about the camouflage
but I got a funny feeling
I'm being followed, you know.
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Like, everywhere I turn,
someone's right on my heels.
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Breathing down my... Yikes!
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(SHIVERING) Don't do that.
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Listen, maybe I should start
from the beginning.
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RED: On Monday I was doing
my laundry when I realized
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I left my new red collar
in the dryer too long.
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And it kinda shrunk.
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Then I noticed it turned
my white undies
all pink in the wash.
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(DISEMBODIED LAUGHTER)
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And if that ain't bad enough,
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the whole place erupts
into laughter.
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But the place was empty.
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Nobody there but me.
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Weird, huh?
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Then on Tuesday,
I went to the movies.
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Comedy marathon
of the funniest movies ever.
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(DISEMBODIED LAUGHTER)
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(EXPLODES)
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RED: The whole place was
filled with laughter, until...
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I noticed I was the only one
in the audience.
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-(TOM LAUGHING)
-There it goes, again.
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(LAUGHING)
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NARRATOR: Rule
number one, Tom,
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never laugh
at a paying client.
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Look, you gotta help me.
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My bowling league has a big
game tonight and the guys
are counting on me.
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But this laughin' is
driving me nuts.
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Holy cow! Look at the clock!
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NARRATOR:
It was 7:10, time to split.
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Red took off for the game,
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and the boys hiked over
to the bowling alley
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to pin down some clues.
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(PANTING)
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NARRATOR:
Not much of a stretch there,
eh, boys?
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They decided the best way
to start unraveling
this mystery
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was to talk with Red's date
from last night.
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Rita at the Kibble Bar.
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Red took me out on a date
last night after his game.
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He said he was nervous
to be alone.
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RITA: Yeah, he was really
layin' it on thick.
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(DISEMBODIED LAUGHTER)
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Hey, why you's
laughin' at me?
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Red, baby. Why would I be
laughin' at you's?
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(LAUGHTER LOOPING)
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-Quit laughing at me!
-(LAUGHING CONTINUES)
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(SCREAMING)
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(THUDS)
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RITA: I sure wasn't laughing.
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He left me to pick up
the check.
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The whole joint was quiet
as a church.
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I tell ya',
nobody was laughing
at anything.
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(SCRIBBLING)
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NARRATOR: You guys really
need to learn shorthand.
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Or the alphabet,
for that matter.
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Looks like you got stuck
with the bill again.
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Yeah, ha, ha.
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NARRATOR: That was their
cue to hit the billiard room
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and scope out Butch,
the manager.
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I remember Red playing here.
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He was all by himself
at table three.
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(RICOCHETING)
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(THUDS)
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(THUDS)
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-(THUDS)
-(DISEMBODIED LAUGHTER)
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All of you's,
stop laughing at me!
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(TOM AND BUTCH LAUGHING)
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You wanna know
what else is funny?
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Nobody was even
in that room laughing.
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(LAUGHING)
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Yeah, if you're lookin'
for him,
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he went down to the bowling
alley for the big league
championship tonight.
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(TOM SNICKERING)
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NARRATOR: They made
their way to the bowling range
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where team captain Spike
was ready to strike.
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(PINS FALLING)
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Somebody out to get Red?
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Let em' try.
Red'll bowl rings around them.
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He's our star player.
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(DISEMBODIED LAUGHTER)
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RED: (SCREAMING) No!
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(THUDS)
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(DISEMBODIED LAUGHTER)
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Aw, split.
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(DISEMBODIED LAUGHTER)
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(SPITS)
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(CHUCKLES)
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(RED SCREAMING)
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(TOM LAUGHING HYSTERICALLY)
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(GROWLS) This just cost us
the championship.
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NARRATOR: Out of one
alley and into another.
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Tom was starting to feel
like an alley cat.
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(RED SIGHS)
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What's the use? I give up.
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I'm just one
big slip-up.
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(YELLS) Not again!
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(CRASHES)
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(THUDS)
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(LAUGHING HYSTERICALLY)
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-(DISEMBODIED LAUGHTER)
-Quit it!
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(SIGHS)
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You know, I'm beginning
to think that maybe it's all
in my head.
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(SNAPS)
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-(FLEAS LAUGHING)
-NARRATOR: It's just fleas.
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With a low-brow sense
of humor, no less.
Who knew?
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(FLEAS LAUGHING)
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NARRATOR: You've bugged
this guy long enough.
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Time to go.
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(CLANG)
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Uh-oh! Looks like
Tom's caught
the laughing bug too.
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(CLANGS)
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The fun's over, guys.
Make like a bug and flea.
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(SCREAMS)
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Hey, I don't hear
no laughing anymore.
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You guys did it.
Thanks a million.
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I feel like my old self again.
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(THUDS)
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(AUDIENCE LAUGHING)
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Wait. Now who's laughing?
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NARRATOR: Smile
for the camera, fellas.
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Turns out all the world's
a stage, after all.
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A TV soundstage, in this case.
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Complete with a live
studio audience.
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-(AUDIENCE LAUGHING)
-That's our show for tonight.
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And now a word from
our sponsor.
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-(AUDIENCE APPLAUDING)
-And that's no
laughing matter.