1
00:00:52,300 --> 00:00:56,010
Mom's not gonna eat cupcakes that have
clearly been fingered by tiny hands.
2
00:00:56,090 --> 00:00:57,140
They're for me.
3
00:00:57,220 --> 00:00:59,390
It's stressful being the buffer
between you two.
4
00:00:59,470 --> 00:01:01,600
I've only been doing it my whole life.
5
00:01:02,060 --> 00:01:03,600
I've been a buffer for you.
6
00:01:03,680 --> 00:01:06,310
I mean, remember that time
I came with you to confront Mom
7
00:01:06,400 --> 00:01:07,770
when you secretly gave her that loan?
8
00:01:07,850 --> 00:01:10,230
You had to know she was gonna find out.
9
00:01:10,320 --> 00:01:14,360
Look, Mallory, not to get super dark,
but I thought she'd die first.
10
00:01:17,950 --> 00:01:20,620
Hey, so what happened
with square-jawed Ryan?
11
00:01:20,700 --> 00:01:23,580
Nothing. Just a bunch of sex and stuff.
12
00:01:23,660 --> 00:01:24,750
Good for you.
13
00:01:24,830 --> 00:01:27,210
I know. He has, like, 17 abs.
14
00:01:27,290 --> 00:01:30,710
Was it hot? Was it fun?
Was it hot and fun?
15
00:01:30,790 --> 00:01:34,720
It was... many things.
16
00:01:34,800 --> 00:01:37,300
Wow, this is the least graphic
you've ever been.
17
00:01:37,380 --> 00:01:40,600
Where are the disgusting,
yet creative, descriptors?
18
00:01:40,680 --> 00:01:43,520
I may have just gotten more discreet
in my old age.
19
00:01:45,140 --> 00:01:47,770
-His penis had abs.
-There it is.
20
00:02:04,490 --> 00:02:08,580
Hi, Mommy, who inspires me
every day to be a better Brianna.
21
00:02:09,250 --> 00:02:12,590
You had no right to get involved
in my business.
22
00:02:13,170 --> 00:02:15,510
Okay, I see we're diving right in there.
23
00:02:15,590 --> 00:02:17,800
Mom, I wasn't trying to get involved.
24
00:02:17,880 --> 00:02:20,640
I was trying to help you out.
Where's Frankie?
25
00:02:20,720 --> 00:02:22,350
-Frankie!
-She's not here.
26
00:02:22,430 --> 00:02:24,720
-Where is she?
-Don't know, don't care.
27
00:02:24,810 --> 00:02:27,350
Typical Frankie,
leaving when the heat's at the door.
28
00:02:27,430 --> 00:02:30,560
She's probably halfway to Borrego
right now, wearing one of her moustaches.
29
00:02:30,650 --> 00:02:33,980
You know, I never would have taken
that money if I'd known it was from you.
30
00:02:34,070 --> 00:02:36,650
I know and that's why I didn't tell you.
31
00:02:36,740 --> 00:02:39,660
-That's smart, right?
-No!
32
00:02:41,450 --> 00:02:44,160
What does it matter
where the money came from?
33
00:02:44,240 --> 00:02:45,490
It matters.
34
00:02:53,920 --> 00:02:55,170
Can I just say,
35
00:02:55,250 --> 00:02:57,170
in terms of terrible things
Brianna's done,
36
00:02:57,260 --> 00:02:59,220
giving you money
isn't exactly at the top of the list.
37
00:02:59,300 --> 00:03:00,130
Thank you!
38
00:03:00,220 --> 00:03:02,340
So what, exactly, is the problem?
39
00:03:02,430 --> 00:03:03,510
The problem.
40
00:03:03,600 --> 00:03:05,180
You want to know what the problem is?
41
00:03:06,810 --> 00:03:11,600
The problem is... children aren't
supposed to do this for parents.
42
00:03:11,690 --> 00:03:13,900
Parents are supposed to do this
for children.
43
00:03:13,980 --> 00:03:17,230
Mom, at a certain point
aren't we supposed to do things for you?
44
00:03:17,320 --> 00:03:20,780
Because we love you
and you gave us life...
45
00:03:21,660 --> 00:03:23,160
and good hair.
46
00:03:23,870 --> 00:03:26,030
Maybe it's getting to be that time.
47
00:03:28,620 --> 00:03:31,120
It is not "that time."
48
00:03:31,210 --> 00:03:33,880
Do you understand me?
It is not "that time"!
49
00:03:33,960 --> 00:03:36,750
We are not at "that time."
50
00:03:40,880 --> 00:03:42,720
He's dead, Mom. You got him.
51
00:03:47,640 --> 00:03:48,810
I want to take this away.
52
00:03:51,180 --> 00:03:53,900
So we started off in a classic standoff.
53
00:03:53,980 --> 00:03:56,150
I was looking at him,
he was looking at me,
54
00:03:56,230 --> 00:03:57,270
giving me the stink eye.
55
00:03:57,360 --> 00:03:59,440
No one was backing down.
56
00:03:59,530 --> 00:04:03,820
And then I remembered what my therapist
said about being more authoritative,
57
00:04:03,910 --> 00:04:05,200
so I stood my ground.
58
00:04:05,280 --> 00:04:09,870
I said, "You hairless monster.
You poop in the litter box!"
59
00:04:09,950 --> 00:04:13,000
-Whoa.
-Yeah. And ever since then, guess what?
60
00:04:13,080 --> 00:04:14,920
Gregory poops in the litter box.
61
00:04:15,000 --> 00:04:19,800
No, no, no. He still poops in my shoes,
but I can tell he feels horrible about it.
62
00:04:19,880 --> 00:04:23,220
You are a tough one.
63
00:04:23,300 --> 00:04:24,680
You can be tough, too.
64
00:04:24,760 --> 00:04:27,430
Well, I have to be. I'm the boss now.
65
00:04:28,430 --> 00:04:30,020
You want to try bossing me around?
66
00:04:31,060 --> 00:04:32,270
Maybe.
67
00:04:32,810 --> 00:04:34,140
Pour me some more wine, please.
68
00:04:34,230 --> 00:04:36,520
No, no, not please. Not please.
69
00:04:38,400 --> 00:04:39,520
Pour me some more wine.
70
00:04:41,070 --> 00:04:42,240
If you insist.
71
00:04:46,030 --> 00:04:48,990
Is this low-histamine wine
cooperating with your allergies?
72
00:04:49,080 --> 00:04:52,250
No, I'm completely inflamed.
73
00:04:52,330 --> 00:04:53,330
Hmm.
74
00:04:58,840 --> 00:05:01,960
Oh, Bud, I'm sorry.
I know I'm not supposed to be here--
75
00:05:02,050 --> 00:05:04,510
Coyote, you are such an ass--
Mom?
76
00:05:04,590 --> 00:05:06,930
I know. I am an ass-mom.
77
00:05:07,010 --> 00:05:09,050
But she called me really freaking out.
78
00:05:09,140 --> 00:05:10,720
-What's wrong?
-I'm bleeding!
79
00:05:10,810 --> 00:05:12,520
-What?!
-Emotionally.
80
00:05:12,600 --> 00:05:16,810
Ahh, Mom, we talked about the difference
between physical and emotional bleeding.
81
00:05:18,190 --> 00:05:20,980
-What the hell's going on?
-I think a fight with Grace?
82
00:05:21,070 --> 00:05:24,650
I don't know, it's hard to say.
She was rambling like a prison letter.
83
00:05:24,740 --> 00:05:27,360
You need to get her out of here
because I had an evening planned.
84
00:05:27,450 --> 00:05:30,450
Bud, this is not about you.
Something happened.
85
00:05:30,530 --> 00:05:32,410
My dummy exploded.
86
00:05:33,910 --> 00:05:36,370
It's crazy how often
she has cause to say that.
87
00:05:36,460 --> 00:05:38,040
Hi, Allison.
88
00:05:38,120 --> 00:05:38,960
Hi.
89
00:05:39,040 --> 00:05:40,500
How's your ichthyosis?
90
00:05:40,590 --> 00:05:43,300
Drying up. I'm starting to slough.
91
00:05:43,380 --> 00:05:47,010
-How are you?
-Oh! My roommate has a gun!
92
00:05:47,090 --> 00:05:49,220
Like a real gun
or like an emotional kind of--
93
00:05:49,300 --> 00:05:52,430
Uh, right now, in this moment,
is there something that I need to do?
94
00:05:52,510 --> 00:05:55,100
-Because if not--
-Yes. No. Yes.
95
00:05:55,180 --> 00:05:59,270
Look, team, I will tell you everything
in a moment, but I'm beat.
96
00:05:59,350 --> 00:06:02,770
-Of course. Yeah, use Bud's bed.
-Uh...
97
00:06:02,860 --> 00:06:05,240
Bud was kind of planning on
using Bud's bed.
98
00:06:05,320 --> 00:06:07,360
Oh, thank you, Coyote.
99
00:06:09,160 --> 00:06:11,490
Oh, rose petals!
100
00:06:11,580 --> 00:06:13,330
Oh, thank you, Bud.
101
00:06:13,990 --> 00:06:15,750
Well, where are we gonna fuck?
102
00:06:16,830 --> 00:06:19,460
Allison, um... I'm on this.
103
00:06:19,540 --> 00:06:23,170
Just give me a second to put out this
non-fire and I will be right with you.
104
00:06:23,250 --> 00:06:26,630
Bud! I didn't know you had silk sheets.
105
00:06:26,720 --> 00:06:29,430
Okay. Well, I think I'm gonna head out.
106
00:06:29,510 --> 00:06:33,140
Okay, just give me an hour
and then come back.
107
00:06:33,220 --> 00:06:36,220
If you'd like, consider that an order.
108
00:06:36,890 --> 00:06:38,310
I like.
109
00:06:39,730 --> 00:06:41,230
See you in an hour.
110
00:06:46,320 --> 00:06:48,990
Oh, look at that,
her ichthyosis really does look better.
111
00:06:53,030 --> 00:06:56,120
According to my mother,
your mother has a gun. Is this true?
112
00:06:56,200 --> 00:06:58,000
Wait, Frankie found Louise?
113
00:06:58,080 --> 00:07:01,540
-Your mother's gun is named Louise?
-Your brother's name is Coyote?
114
00:07:02,830 --> 00:07:04,920
-Did Grace mention a shooting?
-No.
115
00:07:05,000 --> 00:07:07,670
-Is that why Frankie's not here?
-We're still piecing it together.
116
00:07:07,760 --> 00:07:09,720
All I know is that my bed,
117
00:07:09,800 --> 00:07:11,760
which I specifically
re-pillowed for Allison,
118
00:07:11,840 --> 00:07:13,010
is now occupied by my mother.
119
00:07:13,090 --> 00:07:17,470
And the fact that this is a problem
is somehow lost on my brother.
120
00:07:17,560 --> 00:07:18,810
Oh, I've stopped listening.
121
00:07:19,430 --> 00:07:22,020
Ooh...
122
00:07:24,650 --> 00:07:28,190
Did something happen
between you and Frankie and Louise?
123
00:07:29,070 --> 00:07:30,070
Mom...
124
00:07:32,700 --> 00:07:34,700
Did you take a shot at Frankie?
125
00:07:34,780 --> 00:07:39,960
Please, she was barely in the house
when the firearm discharged.
126
00:07:40,040 --> 00:07:43,210
I could feel the heat of the bullets
whizzing by my head!
127
00:07:43,290 --> 00:07:46,210
You shot at your best friend?
128
00:07:46,290 --> 00:07:47,130
No!
129
00:07:47,210 --> 00:07:50,800
I shot at an extremely life-like piñata.
130
00:07:50,880 --> 00:07:54,800
Oh, it looked just like me.
She knew what she was doing.
131
00:07:54,890 --> 00:07:58,010
She is a dangerous, menacing lunatic.
132
00:07:58,100 --> 00:07:59,350
Has she called?
133
00:07:59,430 --> 00:08:01,810
I'm not calling her.
I need another drink.
134
00:08:01,890 --> 00:08:03,400
Or...
135
00:08:03,480 --> 00:08:04,310
What?
136
00:08:04,400 --> 00:08:06,360
We could smoke all of Frankie's pot.
137
00:08:06,440 --> 00:08:10,530
I promised her if I ever smoked the pot
I would do it with her.
138
00:08:10,610 --> 00:08:13,700
Or... it's a double "fuck you."
139
00:08:13,780 --> 00:08:15,870
I don't care for that language...
140
00:08:17,450 --> 00:08:18,790
but fuck her!
141
00:08:18,870 --> 00:08:20,870
You know what might help you right now?
142
00:08:20,950 --> 00:08:23,370
A nice, long cuddle--
143
00:08:23,460 --> 00:08:26,130
Oh, I thought you'd never ask.
144
00:08:26,210 --> 00:08:29,670
With Jacob! You know,
your boyfriend at his home.
145
00:08:30,840 --> 00:08:33,510
-He's a little upset with me.
-Oy.
146
00:08:33,590 --> 00:08:37,720
Mom, I think what you and Brianna
tried to do for Grace was nice.
147
00:08:37,800 --> 00:08:40,470
Oh, thank you, son-friend.
148
00:08:40,560 --> 00:08:41,980
I think so, too.
149
00:08:42,060 --> 00:08:45,600
Maybe you guys could go think thoughts
someplace together! Like a Denny's.
150
00:08:45,690 --> 00:08:48,270
Bud, she's really shaken up.
151
00:08:48,360 --> 00:08:53,070
Normally, I'm not wild about being
talked about in the third person...
152
00:08:53,820 --> 00:08:56,530
but "she" is really shaken up.
153
00:08:56,610 --> 00:09:00,450
Would a little music therapy
be good right about now?
154
00:09:00,540 --> 00:09:02,040
You mean a jam sesh?
155
00:09:02,120 --> 00:09:05,960
No, no, no, let's not turn this into
one of Coyote's sad open mic nights.
156
00:09:06,040 --> 00:09:07,290
They're not sad.
157
00:09:07,380 --> 00:09:10,300
Uh, you have to pay to perform.
158
00:09:10,380 --> 00:09:12,800
Do you still know "Sister Golden Hair"?
159
00:09:12,880 --> 00:09:14,510
Just the intro.
160
00:09:14,590 --> 00:09:17,390
That's cool, just play a bunch of that.
161
00:09:17,470 --> 00:09:19,510
No! Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey!
162
00:09:19,600 --> 00:09:20,470
Mom!
163
00:09:20,560 --> 00:09:23,270
I've got an idea.
What if I get you a hotel room?
164
00:09:23,350 --> 00:09:26,310
A nice comfortable bed, free cable?
165
00:09:26,390 --> 00:09:27,810
Room service?
166
00:09:28,440 --> 00:09:32,650
You and the, uh, "band" could trash it.
167
00:09:34,070 --> 00:09:38,490
Put the word "vegan" before "room service"
and you've got yourself a deal.
168
00:09:40,580 --> 00:09:41,950
Oh, wait, there's Rizzoli--
169
00:09:42,040 --> 00:09:44,540
- He lied to me!
- All About Eve--
170
00:09:44,620 --> 00:09:47,370
- And it's out of here!
- The Padres.
171
00:09:47,460 --> 00:09:50,380
Think you could pick a channel
and stick with it?
172
00:09:54,050 --> 00:09:55,920
-Robert.
-Hmm?
173
00:09:56,010 --> 00:10:00,970
You abused your power as the remote holder
and now I'm taking it.
174
00:10:01,050 --> 00:10:02,140
Hey, I'm watching that.
175
00:10:03,100 --> 00:10:05,770
Yes, well, I'm sorry to pull you away
176
00:10:05,850 --> 00:10:10,770
from your new favorite Korean soap opera
with no subtitles, but we need to talk.
177
00:10:10,860 --> 00:10:13,400
I can figure out
what they're saying from context.
178
00:10:13,480 --> 00:10:15,360
It's the hallmark of good storytelling.
179
00:10:15,440 --> 00:10:18,280
Like, for example,
you see that fellow on the phone?
180
00:10:18,780 --> 00:10:20,700
He has a secret pet chicken named Doug,
181
00:10:20,780 --> 00:10:24,370
but animals are not allowed
in his building so he's deeply ashamed.
182
00:10:24,450 --> 00:10:29,330
Is it possible you're projecting
onto this nice Korean gentleman and Doug?
183
00:10:29,420 --> 00:10:31,210
I am not.
184
00:10:31,290 --> 00:10:36,050
Right. So the fugue state you've been in
has nothing to do with your mother?
185
00:10:36,130 --> 00:10:38,800
That's right.
I told her the truth.
186
00:10:38,880 --> 00:10:42,220
She reacted horribly like I knew
she would and that's that.
187
00:10:42,300 --> 00:10:45,390
She's your mother, for God's sake.
How could you not be affected by her?
188
00:10:45,470 --> 00:10:47,640
Listen, Sol, I know you're trying to help,
189
00:10:47,730 --> 00:10:51,730
but really, I don't want
to think about her anymore, okay?
190
00:10:54,570 --> 00:10:56,400
All right.
191
00:10:56,480 --> 00:10:58,190
If that's what you want.
192
00:11:00,410 --> 00:11:02,620
I'm sorry.
You've been very patient with me
193
00:11:02,700 --> 00:11:04,580
and I shouldn't take it all out on you.
194
00:11:04,660 --> 00:11:06,160
That's what I'm here for.
195
00:11:10,500 --> 00:11:13,330
How about we make
a romantic evening of it?
196
00:11:15,300 --> 00:11:17,630
-You'd be up for that?
-And why wouldn't I be?
197
00:11:17,710 --> 00:11:22,140
I don't know. I guess you haven't seemed
terribly interested in romance lately.
198
00:11:22,220 --> 00:11:24,600
Actually, not since we moved in.
199
00:11:24,680 --> 00:11:27,970
Really? No. Didn't we--
200
00:11:28,060 --> 00:11:29,520
The night Peter was here?
201
00:11:29,600 --> 00:11:30,600
Nope.
202
00:11:31,770 --> 00:11:35,440
Oh. The night I brought home
lobster tails?
203
00:11:35,520 --> 00:11:37,570
That was in the old house.
204
00:11:38,230 --> 00:11:39,780
Really? Oh my.
205
00:11:40,490 --> 00:11:41,740
They were good tails.
206
00:11:42,360 --> 00:11:43,740
You drank the melted butter.
207
00:11:43,820 --> 00:11:45,780
You saw that?
208
00:11:45,870 --> 00:11:47,580
-I see everything.
-All right.
209
00:11:47,660 --> 00:11:48,910
We're gonna fix this right now.
210
00:11:49,000 --> 00:11:51,580
You and I are going to make
a delicious dinner,
211
00:11:51,660 --> 00:11:53,880
then afterwards,
we're gonna light some candles
212
00:11:53,960 --> 00:11:56,920
and then pop a nice,
chilled bottle of champagne.
213
00:11:58,880 --> 00:12:00,970
You mean the gateway drug to romance?
214
00:12:01,050 --> 00:12:03,050
You've caught my drift.
215
00:12:03,800 --> 00:12:05,930
You all right with missing your program?
216
00:12:06,010 --> 00:12:09,930
I've seen this one before.
It does not end well for the chicken.
217
00:12:10,020 --> 00:12:11,600
Come, my love.
218
00:12:14,900 --> 00:12:17,650
-That's it.
-Go, Mom!
219
00:12:26,320 --> 00:12:27,620
It's still not working.
220
00:12:28,410 --> 00:12:32,160
No, I told you the pot doesn't work on me.
221
00:12:33,040 --> 00:12:35,170
My mouth is dry.
222
00:12:36,540 --> 00:12:38,920
Marijuana's finally met its match:
223
00:12:39,000 --> 00:12:40,550
Grace Hanson.
224
00:12:40,630 --> 00:12:43,590
There's not enough weed in this world
to relax that woman.
225
00:12:47,010 --> 00:12:48,600
-So?
-So what?
226
00:12:49,220 --> 00:12:51,680
-Are you gonna see him again?
-See who?
227
00:12:51,770 --> 00:12:52,930
The guy with the penis abs.
228
00:12:53,020 --> 00:12:55,850
Jesus, Mallory.
229
00:12:55,940 --> 00:12:58,270
What are you not telling me?
Was he bad at sex?
230
00:12:58,360 --> 00:13:01,690
No. He was very professional.
231
00:13:01,780 --> 00:13:02,900
Then what's the problem?
232
00:13:02,990 --> 00:13:05,490
He was... a professional.
233
00:13:05,570 --> 00:13:06,780
Like a lawyer?
234
00:13:06,860 --> 00:13:10,030
Well, yeah, sort of like a lawyer.
He charged me $300 for the hour.
235
00:13:10,740 --> 00:13:13,160
I'm too stoned to play this game.
What are you saying?
236
00:13:13,250 --> 00:13:14,620
He was a working man.
237
00:13:16,000 --> 00:13:17,580
A man of the night.
238
00:13:18,500 --> 00:13:20,340
Has a heart of gold.
239
00:13:21,380 --> 00:13:23,090
Jesus, Mallory, he's a hooker.
240
00:13:24,010 --> 00:13:25,800
-What?
-Shh.
241
00:13:25,880 --> 00:13:28,590
Do you really want Mom
to find out that I'm a Jean?
242
00:13:28,680 --> 00:13:29,550
What's a Jean?
243
00:13:29,640 --> 00:13:32,310
It's a female John. Can you keep up?
244
00:13:32,970 --> 00:13:35,180
Do you know what I just realized?
245
00:13:35,270 --> 00:13:37,850
The kitchen is still clean.
246
00:13:38,560 --> 00:13:40,440
It's been clean all day.
247
00:13:40,520 --> 00:13:44,820
The same amount of time
Frankie's been gone.
248
00:13:45,740 --> 00:13:47,860
Man, I could get used to this.
249
00:13:47,950 --> 00:13:49,030
You say that now.
250
00:13:49,120 --> 00:13:50,280
You'd miss her.
251
00:13:50,370 --> 00:13:51,530
You'd miss...
252
00:13:53,490 --> 00:13:54,330
her.
253
00:13:55,000 --> 00:13:58,120
Hair in my brush? Paint in my shower?
254
00:13:58,210 --> 00:13:59,880
Her in my shower?
255
00:13:59,960 --> 00:14:01,920
Shower in my kitchen?
256
00:14:02,000 --> 00:14:05,010
Do you know what I would pay
for some peace and quiet around here?
257
00:14:05,090 --> 00:14:06,720
Three hundred dollars?
258
00:14:07,880 --> 00:14:12,560
Or, you could pay nothing
because you'd hate living alone.
259
00:14:12,640 --> 00:14:16,020
And you'd have no one
to boss around or shoot at.
260
00:14:16,100 --> 00:14:18,310
I wouldn't hate living alone.
I've done it already.
261
00:14:18,390 --> 00:14:21,110
-When?
-With your father.
262
00:14:23,110 --> 00:14:24,230
Ouf.
263
00:14:24,320 --> 00:14:27,740
There's nothing like being
with somebody and still feeling alone.
264
00:14:29,360 --> 00:14:30,490
I know.
265
00:14:31,450 --> 00:14:32,370
What's wrong?
266
00:14:33,870 --> 00:14:35,700
Everything and nothing, you know?
267
00:14:35,790 --> 00:14:38,540
Just... everything and nothing.
268
00:14:39,920 --> 00:14:41,290
Ouf.
269
00:14:42,380 --> 00:14:44,300
No, no, no to that.
270
00:14:44,380 --> 00:14:46,090
No to loneliness.
271
00:14:46,170 --> 00:14:48,300
I have a husband and a billion kids!
272
00:14:48,380 --> 00:14:50,300
And you're not lonely!
273
00:14:50,390 --> 00:14:53,050
I bet you never feel alone
when you're with Frankie.
274
00:14:54,010 --> 00:14:55,310
Huh. No.
275
00:14:55,390 --> 00:14:57,600
Then what are you doing?
You have a Frankie.
276
00:14:57,680 --> 00:14:59,310
I wish I had a Frankie.
277
00:15:00,100 --> 00:15:01,100
I am...
278
00:15:03,650 --> 00:15:06,280
I mean, I thought I was your Frankie.
279
00:15:06,360 --> 00:15:10,700
You are. You are.
280
00:15:12,280 --> 00:15:14,780
See, Mom?
Don't you want this with Frankie?
281
00:15:14,870 --> 00:15:16,160
Why?
282
00:15:16,240 --> 00:15:17,450
I have it with you.
283
00:15:18,580 --> 00:15:21,540
We're having it right now.
284
00:15:21,620 --> 00:15:26,840
Maybe the three of us can finally be close
like I've heard families can get.
285
00:15:27,590 --> 00:15:30,380
You know, we can hang out more,
just like tonight.
286
00:15:30,470 --> 00:15:33,090
And we can smoke the pot
and have the talks.
287
00:15:33,180 --> 00:15:35,100
Maybe we could start a book club.
288
00:15:38,470 --> 00:15:40,770
Get your fucking mother over here.
289
00:15:46,270 --> 00:15:48,480
Hey, hey, Mom.
290
00:15:50,950 --> 00:15:53,610
Want to go for a ride in the trunk?
291
00:15:53,700 --> 00:15:57,370
Yeah! No! Wait, where are we going?
292
00:15:57,450 --> 00:15:58,740
To the beach house.
293
00:15:58,830 --> 00:16:01,160
Oh, hell-to-the-nah.
294
00:16:03,290 --> 00:16:06,170
Fuck! That's Allison.
It's been an hour already?
295
00:16:06,250 --> 00:16:09,630
It's been 87 minutes.
For some reason, I know that.
296
00:16:10,510 --> 00:16:12,970
-Hey.
-Hey. Oh.
297
00:16:13,050 --> 00:16:15,760
-This is being fixed, I promise.
-Let's just call it a night.
298
00:16:15,850 --> 00:16:17,430
There's a lot going on here.
299
00:16:17,510 --> 00:16:20,100
She's talking about our tasty riffs.
300
00:16:20,180 --> 00:16:23,940
-Okay, everybody, let's go.
-I'm not going to the beach.
301
00:16:24,020 --> 00:16:26,190
-Then you're going to the vegan hotel.
-All right.
302
00:16:26,270 --> 00:16:29,150
But first we have to go to CVS
for a toothbrush,
303
00:16:29,230 --> 00:16:31,610
and then to Target
for a new pair of pajamas...
304
00:16:31,690 --> 00:16:33,360
-Mom, no--
-...and then back to CVS
305
00:16:33,450 --> 00:16:34,910
because I always forget something.
306
00:16:34,990 --> 00:16:36,870
Good, and you know I need some ChapStick.
307
00:16:36,950 --> 00:16:38,450
Oh, I actually have some ChapStick.
308
00:16:38,530 --> 00:16:40,290
Wait! Wait.
309
00:16:41,580 --> 00:16:42,620
Let me be direct.
310
00:16:43,710 --> 00:16:46,630
Mom, we're gonna go back to the beach
house, you're gonna grab your things,
311
00:16:46,710 --> 00:16:48,420
and both of you are gonna go
to the vegan hotel,
312
00:16:48,500 --> 00:16:51,210
where I'm sure there will be
cruelty-free ChapStick.
313
00:17:07,860 --> 00:17:09,570
Hello, my love.
314
00:17:12,530 --> 00:17:13,780
Hey, there.
315
00:17:14,860 --> 00:17:16,820
You notice anything different about me?
316
00:17:18,660 --> 00:17:21,370
Other than the way
you're flirting with that doorway?
317
00:17:23,120 --> 00:17:24,830
I'm wearing silk, Sol.
318
00:17:25,330 --> 00:17:28,420
Not cotton, not flannel, but silk.
319
00:17:29,130 --> 00:17:31,420
Nature's sexiest fabric.
320
00:17:32,210 --> 00:17:34,550
It clings in all the right places.
321
00:17:35,420 --> 00:17:38,840
Actually, it clings in all places.
322
00:17:47,190 --> 00:17:49,150
Very nice.
323
00:17:49,900 --> 00:17:51,520
The pajamas are nice, too.
324
00:18:01,080 --> 00:18:02,370
What's wrong?
325
00:18:07,290 --> 00:18:09,000
-What is it?
-Ah, nothing.
326
00:18:10,750 --> 00:18:12,040
I have some heartburn.
327
00:18:13,920 --> 00:18:15,970
I'll make some tea. Excuse me.
328
00:18:22,810 --> 00:18:24,020
Hmm.
329
00:18:30,230 --> 00:18:31,230
Isn't this fun?
330
00:18:31,310 --> 00:18:32,980
Yeah. We can do you next.
331
00:18:33,070 --> 00:18:34,860
No, we're doing Brianna next.
332
00:18:34,940 --> 00:18:37,780
No, I think Brianna's gonna pass on...
333
00:18:37,860 --> 00:18:39,320
She calls it "Jamaica hair."
334
00:18:39,410 --> 00:18:41,200
It's Jamaica hair.
335
00:18:42,070 --> 00:18:44,200
Ooh, but, look,
here's someone who might like it.
336
00:18:44,290 --> 00:18:46,200
We just came to get my mom's weed.
337
00:18:46,290 --> 00:18:49,170
Okay.
338
00:18:49,250 --> 00:18:51,330
I think we found it.
339
00:18:51,420 --> 00:18:53,040
I smoked on it, too.
340
00:18:53,670 --> 00:18:56,300
You said you'd never smoke without me.
341
00:18:57,090 --> 00:19:00,550
But then you also said
you didn't have a gun either, so...
342
00:19:00,640 --> 00:19:04,810
Whoo, whoo! Braid train!
Frankie, climb aboard!
343
00:19:04,890 --> 00:19:06,470
An emphatic "No, thank you"
344
00:19:06,560 --> 00:19:09,600
followed by "You really should
look in a mirror."
345
00:19:11,150 --> 00:19:14,230
-No.
-Remember what I did to those lifeguards
346
00:19:14,320 --> 00:19:17,440
who tried to block me
from double-tubing down that lazy river?
347
00:19:17,530 --> 00:19:20,360
-Yes.
-This has to stop.
348
00:19:20,450 --> 00:19:21,660
And you want to know why?
349
00:19:21,740 --> 00:19:25,280
Because the two of you love each other.
350
00:19:25,370 --> 00:19:27,160
Oh, yeah. Yeah. I said it. Love.
351
00:19:27,240 --> 00:19:30,330
L-O-V-E. L-U-V if you're feeling sassy.
352
00:19:30,410 --> 00:19:31,790
I'm not feeling sassy.
353
00:19:31,870 --> 00:19:34,040
Oh, you're never feeling sassy.
354
00:19:34,130 --> 00:19:37,050
Well, you wouldn't know
what sassy looks like on me.
355
00:19:37,130 --> 00:19:39,050
Oh, why don't you eat a bowl of wangs!
356
00:19:39,130 --> 00:19:40,340
Bud, we should go.
357
00:19:40,420 --> 00:19:43,010
"Bowl of wangs" is how it started
with those lifeguards.
358
00:19:43,090 --> 00:19:45,510
This is ridiculous.
You two are best friends!
359
00:19:45,600 --> 00:19:50,390
And everyone who knows you can see that,
even if we don't understand how.
360
00:19:50,480 --> 00:19:53,690
Yeah, Mom, come on. You were just saying
how much Frankie means to you.
361
00:19:53,770 --> 00:19:56,520
She said she never-- Ow.
She said she nev-- Ow!
362
00:19:56,610 --> 00:19:58,900
She said she never felt alone
when she was with you. Mom.
363
00:19:58,980 --> 00:20:00,780
That's a really nice thing
for Grace to say,
364
00:20:00,860 --> 00:20:03,990
and she wouldn't have pulled so hard
on Mallory's hair if it wasn't true.
365
00:20:04,070 --> 00:20:06,660
Now, I know you're upset about the gun
366
00:20:06,740 --> 00:20:09,790
and no one here
is trying to minimize that.
367
00:20:11,790 --> 00:20:13,620
May I ask what is so funny?
368
00:20:13,710 --> 00:20:15,960
You look just like your dummy right now.
369
00:20:16,040 --> 00:20:18,340
What? Is there a hole in my face?
370
00:20:18,420 --> 00:20:21,760
Oh, yes! And it's going, "Wah wah wah..."
371
00:20:21,840 --> 00:20:25,050
-Oh, God. The pot's kicking in.
-No, no, no, it doesn't affect me.
372
00:20:25,140 --> 00:20:28,180
Yeah, it does, Mom. It does.
373
00:20:28,260 --> 00:20:30,600
-Let's go for a walk. Yeah.
-Wah!
374
00:20:30,680 --> 00:20:33,060
-You gotta stop doing that, Mom.
-Choo-choo!
375
00:20:33,140 --> 00:20:34,650
Oh, this is madness.
376
00:20:34,730 --> 00:20:36,310
Mom. Mom!
377
00:20:37,820 --> 00:20:40,480
She's high.
She's not making fun of you, okay?
378
00:20:40,570 --> 00:20:42,240
People say crazy things when they're high.
379
00:20:42,320 --> 00:20:45,410
I say some of my most profound shit
when I'm high!
380
00:20:45,490 --> 00:20:47,070
Well, that's--
381
00:20:47,160 --> 00:20:48,530
It's Allison.
382
00:20:50,580 --> 00:20:52,330
Hey, baby, can you hang on one sec?
383
00:20:52,410 --> 00:20:55,290
Hey, Bud, I have my therapist,
Dr. Huang, on the line.
384
00:20:55,370 --> 00:20:56,750
Dr. Huang, are you there?
385
00:20:58,840 --> 00:21:00,880
He's there, he just always
hits the mute button with his face.
386
00:21:00,960 --> 00:21:02,970
And why is Dr. Huang on the line?
387
00:21:03,050 --> 00:21:04,800
Oops! Sorry about that. I'm here.
388
00:21:04,880 --> 00:21:07,510
Dr. Huang wants to talk to you
about some of your family issues.
389
00:21:07,600 --> 00:21:11,140
He thinks that your enmeshment with them
is what's holding us back.
390
00:21:11,220 --> 00:21:15,480
I withhold a formal diagnosis
until we have a chance to talk at length.
391
00:21:15,560 --> 00:21:20,020
No. Allison, I will be home in 20 minutes,
27 minutes if there is traffic.
392
00:21:20,110 --> 00:21:23,780
Dr. Huang, it is lovely to meet you.
I have to hang up now.
393
00:21:23,860 --> 00:21:27,030
But-- No, Bud. Just wait. Come on--
394
00:21:27,110 --> 00:21:28,370
Coyote, you got this?
395
00:21:28,450 --> 00:21:29,490
Hard no.
396
00:21:29,580 --> 00:21:31,990
-Mom, Coyote's got this.
-No, Bud, I do not got this.
397
00:21:32,080 --> 00:21:34,870
You need to try, which is what you
should have done in the first place
398
00:21:34,960 --> 00:21:36,540
-when Mom called you.
-I did try!
399
00:21:36,620 --> 00:21:39,920
No, you didn't, you just brought her back
to my place and made me deal with it.
400
00:21:40,000 --> 00:21:42,380
Because I don't have a place.
401
00:21:42,460 --> 00:21:45,930
I know! And don't you think
it's about time to change that?
402
00:21:46,010 --> 00:21:48,140
-Hey.
-I'm trying to change that.
403
00:21:48,220 --> 00:21:49,680
I've been saving up.
404
00:21:49,760 --> 00:21:53,640
And blowing all of your savings on things
like new guitars for your open mic nights!
405
00:21:53,720 --> 00:21:55,230
Because the only thing
more pathetic than that
406
00:21:55,310 --> 00:21:57,440
is sleeping
on your brother's couch for 18 months!
407
00:21:57,520 --> 00:21:59,100
Boys, please!
408
00:21:59,190 --> 00:22:02,900
If you wanted me gone,
you could have said so at any time.
409
00:22:02,980 --> 00:22:07,030
But it's only an issue now
because you're finally getting laid.
410
00:22:07,110 --> 00:22:10,530
Congratulations on finding someone
more neurotic than you!
411
00:22:10,620 --> 00:22:13,080
-Fuck you.
-Fuck you.
412
00:22:15,700 --> 00:22:16,750
Where are you gonna go?
413
00:22:17,620 --> 00:22:20,080
Stop it! Are you happy now?
414
00:22:20,170 --> 00:22:21,340
No, I'm not happy now.
415
00:22:21,420 --> 00:22:25,300
Mom, you need to fix this thing with Grace
or I'm gonna throw myself into the river.
416
00:22:25,380 --> 00:22:28,220
-The ocean's closer.
-Mom, I am serious.
417
00:22:28,300 --> 00:22:31,220
I am, too. I've tried with her.
418
00:22:31,300 --> 00:22:35,020
Well, try harder.
Or sell this place and move on.
419
00:22:35,100 --> 00:22:36,680
I'm not selling anything.
420
00:22:36,770 --> 00:22:39,850
And for the record, I don't need
to be the one to try harder.
421
00:22:40,350 --> 00:22:44,110
In 40 years, your father and I
never had a fight like this.
422
00:22:44,190 --> 00:22:46,900
You want to know why?
Because he would cave in to your tantrums.
423
00:22:46,990 --> 00:22:48,240
Tantrums?
424
00:22:48,320 --> 00:22:52,950
One more word and I'm not gonna
let you take me to my vegan hotel.
425
00:22:53,030 --> 00:22:55,660
Good! I have things to do.
426
00:23:04,300 --> 00:23:06,300
What's she staring at?
427
00:23:07,340 --> 00:23:08,800
Everything.
428
00:23:11,430 --> 00:23:14,470
Has anything she's said
in the last ten minutes made sense?
429
00:23:14,560 --> 00:23:16,220
She called me Shelley.
430
00:23:16,310 --> 00:23:17,810
You look like a Shelley.
431
00:23:20,940 --> 00:23:22,690
-I mean...
-Really?
432
00:23:22,770 --> 00:23:24,110
You don't not.
433
00:23:27,360 --> 00:23:29,150
Let's go.
434
00:23:30,030 --> 00:23:32,530
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
Frankie, come on.
435
00:23:32,620 --> 00:23:34,620
No. I'm going to my hotel,
where I'm welcome.
436
00:23:34,700 --> 00:23:39,410
Where there's a deeply unsatisfying shower
and the trash compactor is a goat.
437
00:23:39,500 --> 00:23:41,790
No, no, no. Frankie.
438
00:23:41,870 --> 00:23:44,130
-What would it take to get you to stay?
-Nothing.
439
00:23:44,210 --> 00:23:46,590
I'm not interested
in living under the same roof
440
00:23:46,670 --> 00:23:50,670
with someone who does
shitty, sneaky things behind my back.
441
00:23:50,760 --> 00:23:54,260
I've already lived that nightmare.
I'm not doing that anymore.
442
00:23:55,300 --> 00:23:56,430
Then go home.
443
00:23:56,510 --> 00:23:58,720
I am home, sea witch.
444
00:24:03,980 --> 00:24:05,020
She locked us out.
445
00:24:07,820 --> 00:24:10,320
-Did you lock us out?
-Yeah, I did.
446
00:24:10,400 --> 00:24:12,400
Because you already locked me out--
447
00:24:12,490 --> 00:24:13,910
Please, don't say it.
448
00:24:13,990 --> 00:24:15,700
Metaphorically.
449
00:24:15,780 --> 00:24:18,080
You make all the decisions
for the business,
450
00:24:18,160 --> 00:24:22,000
you decide what's best for me,
and you don't include me.
451
00:24:22,080 --> 00:24:23,710
That's how you locked me out.
452
00:24:24,790 --> 00:24:25,920
Metaphorically.
453
00:24:26,000 --> 00:24:30,510
You decided to have a gun
without even telling me.
454
00:24:30,590 --> 00:24:33,300
How could I tell you?
455
00:24:33,380 --> 00:24:37,720
You pretend to be so open-minded,
but how often do you actually listen
456
00:24:37,810 --> 00:24:41,980
before you plug up your ears
or burst into song?
457
00:24:42,060 --> 00:24:43,390
Listen to what?
458
00:24:44,310 --> 00:24:47,150
To why I even have a gun to begin with.
459
00:24:47,230 --> 00:24:49,190
Well, I assume to blow holes in people.
460
00:24:50,650 --> 00:24:51,860
See?
461
00:24:51,940 --> 00:24:54,070
Okay, why do you have a gun?
462
00:24:54,150 --> 00:24:55,820
No, never mind.
463
00:24:55,910 --> 00:24:58,200
No! No backsies.
464
00:25:00,290 --> 00:25:02,250
Damn you, Grace!
465
00:25:02,330 --> 00:25:06,000
You've appealed
to my emotionally curious nature.
466
00:25:10,380 --> 00:25:13,090
I'm opening the door just a crack.
467
00:25:20,100 --> 00:25:22,470
So, Robert gave you the gun?
468
00:25:25,520 --> 00:25:28,230
When the kids went away to college.
469
00:25:28,310 --> 00:25:30,360
And, of course, he was never home.
470
00:25:30,440 --> 00:25:34,650
And even when he was, he was being gay
with Sol, not straight with me.
471
00:25:35,150 --> 00:25:36,530
Ha. Nice.
472
00:25:36,610 --> 00:25:38,620
Anyway, I was in that house,
473
00:25:38,700 --> 00:25:42,870
that big, horrible house
all by myself and I was scared.
474
00:25:42,950 --> 00:25:46,330
And Robert's solution
was to give me a gun.
475
00:25:47,710 --> 00:25:51,920
I guess because...
he couldn't give me anything else.
476
00:25:52,760 --> 00:25:58,300
But that was all I had all those years
to make me feel safe.
477
00:25:58,390 --> 00:26:03,060
But you don't live in that big,
horrible house anymore.
478
00:26:03,930 --> 00:26:05,520
You live with me.
479
00:26:06,310 --> 00:26:07,440
I know.
480
00:26:08,310 --> 00:26:11,610
I know. In a way nicer house.
481
00:26:12,150 --> 00:26:15,990
With a way nicer person.
482
00:26:16,900 --> 00:26:21,160
Who usually likes to be with me
all the time.
483
00:26:22,160 --> 00:26:24,290
Sometimes too much.
484
00:26:27,000 --> 00:26:28,370
But I like that.
485
00:26:29,710 --> 00:26:31,290
Sometimes too much.
486
00:26:33,210 --> 00:26:35,510
So why do you still need the gun?
487
00:26:39,970 --> 00:26:41,720
I guess I don't.
488
00:26:43,810 --> 00:26:45,220
Will you get rid of it?
489
00:26:47,390 --> 00:26:50,480
I will. I will.
490
00:26:56,190 --> 00:26:58,110
I promise.
491
00:27:05,450 --> 00:27:07,450
Did they just lock us out?
492
00:27:57,130 --> 00:27:58,510
Okay, good night.