1 00:00:06,131 --> 00:00:09,259 [Grace Potter's "Stuck In The Middle" playing] 2 00:00:13,096 --> 00:00:16,266 ♪ Well, I don't know Why I came here tonight ♪ 3 00:00:16,850 --> 00:00:19,811 ♪ Got the feelin' That somethin' ain't right ♪ 4 00:00:20,562 --> 00:00:24,315 ♪ I'm so scared In case I fall off my chair ♪ 5 00:00:24,399 --> 00:00:28,403 ♪ And I'm wondering How I'll get down the stairs ♪ 6 00:00:28,486 --> 00:00:32,282 ♪ And there's clowns to the left of me Jokers to the right ♪ 7 00:00:32,365 --> 00:00:35,535 ♪ Here I am Stuck in the middle with you ♪ 8 00:00:36,119 --> 00:00:39,998 ♪ Yes, I'm stuck in the middle with you ♪ 9 00:00:40,081 --> 00:00:43,543 ♪ Ooh, ooh ♪ SYNC by DakinPEx 10 00:00:51,259 --> 00:00:53,344 Thank you for coming back, Stam, 11 00:00:53,428 --> 00:00:56,222 considering Grace didn't hire you the first time. 12 00:00:56,306 --> 00:00:58,516 No one ever hires me the first time. 13 00:00:59,184 --> 00:01:01,394 And they never come crawling back. 14 00:01:02,729 --> 00:01:03,646 [Grace scoffs] 15 00:01:04,147 --> 00:01:05,940 I thought I smelled van. 16 00:01:07,358 --> 00:01:08,651 [whispers] What's he doing here? 17 00:01:08,735 --> 00:01:11,029 He's here to save us from your contractor. 18 00:01:11,112 --> 00:01:14,908 My contractor is just fine. And as soon as I get a hold of him-- 19 00:01:14,991 --> 00:01:18,578 We are living in filth and debris, and we have no running water. 20 00:01:18,661 --> 00:01:21,664 You have to turn the water off to do construction. 21 00:01:21,748 --> 00:01:24,209 You also have to turn it off to steal the pipes. 22 00:01:24,292 --> 00:01:25,418 -Huh? -What? 23 00:01:25,502 --> 00:01:27,921 Your guy stole the copper pipes. 24 00:01:28,004 --> 00:01:29,756 It's a classic scam. 25 00:01:30,840 --> 00:01:33,510 [scoffs] No, no. No, no, no, no, we did not get scammed. 26 00:01:33,593 --> 00:01:36,012 You're right. Technically, it was you. 27 00:01:36,095 --> 00:01:39,015 Grace Hanson is not someone who gets scammed. 28 00:01:39,098 --> 00:01:42,936 Grace Hanson is the person who says to the person who gets scammed, 29 00:01:43,019 --> 00:01:44,854 "Hey, idiot, you got scammed." 30 00:01:44,938 --> 00:01:48,108 On the bright side, now you can fix the rodent problem. 31 00:01:48,191 --> 00:01:49,109 What? 32 00:01:49,192 --> 00:01:52,320 Oh, yeah. You got rat nests all up in there. 33 00:01:52,403 --> 00:01:55,281 Grace, that's probably what happened to your necklace. 34 00:01:55,740 --> 00:01:57,700 The one you're wearing as a bracelet? 35 00:01:58,868 --> 00:02:00,370 Oh, my God. 36 00:02:00,453 --> 00:02:03,790 Now, how did those crafty bastards manage that? 37 00:02:10,130 --> 00:02:11,339 Oh. 38 00:02:13,341 --> 00:02:14,467 What's the matter? 39 00:02:15,385 --> 00:02:16,719 I can't sleep. 40 00:02:17,679 --> 00:02:18,972 Can I, though? 41 00:02:20,890 --> 00:02:22,058 Sorry. 42 00:02:23,309 --> 00:02:24,644 Is this about Roy? 43 00:02:24,727 --> 00:02:27,230 No. It's about Professor Harold Hill. 44 00:02:27,856 --> 00:02:30,942 I can't seem to remember a word that man says. 45 00:02:31,025 --> 00:02:35,989 You've got four days. It'll come to you. You just need to relax. 46 00:02:36,072 --> 00:02:37,991 I'm out of relaxation. 47 00:02:38,616 --> 00:02:41,161 You know what might help you relax? 48 00:02:42,036 --> 00:02:44,247 That thing we haven't done for two months. 49 00:02:44,330 --> 00:02:47,458 I don't want to watch The Carol Burnett Show right now. 50 00:02:48,042 --> 00:02:50,253 Is that what the kids are calling it these days? 51 00:02:50,336 --> 00:02:52,380 Do you want to go to the Tappy Awards again? 52 00:02:53,882 --> 00:02:55,925 -Not really. -Well, I do. 53 00:02:56,801 --> 00:02:57,927 [grunts] 54 00:03:06,352 --> 00:03:09,731 No, sir, I am just asking for recommendations 55 00:03:09,814 --> 00:03:11,983 from the last five houses you've worked on. 56 00:03:13,860 --> 00:03:17,697 No, I am not trying to get "all up in your grill." 57 00:03:18,573 --> 00:03:21,701 It's called due diligence, you stupid fuck! 58 00:03:22,952 --> 00:03:24,704 So, we've got a new contractor? 59 00:03:24,787 --> 00:03:26,998 No. I'm afraid to pick one. 60 00:03:27,081 --> 00:03:29,500 You know, how am I supposed to trust myself anymore? 61 00:03:29,584 --> 00:03:31,669 Why not get a recommendation from Nick? 62 00:03:31,753 --> 00:03:34,213 He must know a good, overpriced contractor 63 00:03:34,297 --> 00:03:36,507 who will steal our money honestly. 64 00:03:36,591 --> 00:03:39,010 No, I'm lucky he's in Japan for this disaster. 65 00:03:39,093 --> 00:03:42,263 A scammed old lady isn't exactly an aphrodisiac. 66 00:03:42,347 --> 00:03:45,892 It is in Japan. They have vending machines that sell old-lady undies. 67 00:03:46,559 --> 00:03:49,229 How could I be such a sucker? 68 00:03:49,312 --> 00:03:52,899 [sighs] At least you didn't get lost with your granddaughter. 69 00:03:52,982 --> 00:03:54,859 Frankie, that's not on you. 70 00:03:54,943 --> 00:03:58,321 None of that would have happened if Sol had gotten you alive already. 71 00:03:58,404 --> 00:04:01,241 I know! I would have gotten back on time 72 00:04:01,324 --> 00:04:04,244 and Bud would never have known anything about it. 73 00:04:06,579 --> 00:04:07,872 Ooh. 74 00:04:07,956 --> 00:04:08,873 What's the matter? 75 00:04:08,957 --> 00:04:11,584 I've got this weird sensation in my boobs. 76 00:04:12,752 --> 00:04:13,670 Ooh. 77 00:04:13,753 --> 00:04:15,380 [chuckles] 78 00:04:15,463 --> 00:04:17,090 [buzzing] 79 00:04:17,173 --> 00:04:18,508 There it is. 80 00:04:20,260 --> 00:04:23,554 Oh, I forgot Coyote's coming over. He wants to talk about something. 81 00:04:23,638 --> 00:04:25,807 No, no, no, he cannot see this place! 82 00:04:25,890 --> 00:04:27,684 -Why not? -Because he'll freak out 83 00:04:27,767 --> 00:04:29,811 and then he'll freak all the other kids out. 84 00:04:29,894 --> 00:04:33,273 And when they freak out, we get Panic Alerts. 85 00:04:33,356 --> 00:04:35,108 Oh, that would not be good. 86 00:04:35,650 --> 00:04:38,444 Especially since Bud already thinks I'm losing it. 87 00:04:38,528 --> 00:04:39,404 Exactly. 88 00:04:39,487 --> 00:04:42,490 When my daughters find out that I handed over ten grand 89 00:04:42,573 --> 00:04:44,951 to somebody who helped themselves to our copper pipes, 90 00:04:45,034 --> 00:04:47,829 they're gonna take my checkbook away and who knows what else. 91 00:04:47,912 --> 00:04:49,205 What do we do? 92 00:04:49,289 --> 00:04:50,790 Well, tell him not to come. 93 00:04:52,125 --> 00:04:56,212 "I have come down with a bout of Ebola. 94 00:04:56,296 --> 00:04:58,298 You may not want to see this." 95 00:04:58,756 --> 00:04:59,757 [phone buzzes] 96 00:04:59,841 --> 00:05:01,009 Uh-oh. 97 00:05:01,092 --> 00:05:03,428 "Ha-ha. Parking now." 98 00:05:11,936 --> 00:05:14,063 -Hi! -Oh, hi! 99 00:05:15,982 --> 00:05:19,068 Didn't they stop making those once we realized the sun was bad? 100 00:05:19,152 --> 00:05:20,320 They sure did. 101 00:05:20,403 --> 00:05:22,655 Good thing I held onto mine, right? 102 00:05:23,114 --> 00:05:25,533 -What are you doing here? -And where are you going? 103 00:05:25,616 --> 00:05:27,910 I gotta pee. I had three Red Bulls in the car. 104 00:05:27,994 --> 00:05:29,037 -No! -No, you can't-- 105 00:05:29,120 --> 00:05:30,788 But I really gotta go... 106 00:05:31,414 --> 00:05:34,876 Just go in the pool, like you did as a kid. 107 00:05:34,959 --> 00:05:37,128 Nothing we haven't seen before. 108 00:05:37,211 --> 00:05:38,296 Unfortunately. 109 00:05:39,005 --> 00:05:41,132 -You know, I'll hold it for now. -Oh. 110 00:05:42,675 --> 00:05:43,509 Um... 111 00:05:44,635 --> 00:05:47,430 Hey, Grace, I kind of wanted to talk to my mom about something. 112 00:05:47,513 --> 00:05:48,681 Could we have the courtyard? 113 00:05:48,765 --> 00:05:51,976 [chuckles] Oh, Coyote, I assure you, I'm not listening. 114 00:05:52,977 --> 00:05:55,188 So, what are you dying to talk about, honey? 115 00:05:56,522 --> 00:06:01,319 Well, things have been going really good between me and Nadia lately. 116 00:06:01,402 --> 00:06:03,362 -Such a sweet girl. -[Grace] Get to the point. 117 00:06:03,446 --> 00:06:06,449 And she just graduated makeup school, 118 00:06:06,532 --> 00:06:08,034 so she's gonna move to LA. 119 00:06:08,117 --> 00:06:10,828 She wants to work on one of the NCIS's. 120 00:06:10,912 --> 00:06:12,455 -How exciting! -Send her our love. 121 00:06:13,748 --> 00:06:17,251 And, Mom, I know this might be... 122 00:06:18,294 --> 00:06:19,504 hard for you to hear... 123 00:06:19,587 --> 00:06:21,297 Only at the pace you're saying it. 124 00:06:24,884 --> 00:06:26,844 I've decided I'm gonna go with her. 125 00:06:28,054 --> 00:06:29,138 You're moving? 126 00:06:29,889 --> 00:06:30,932 Wow. 127 00:06:31,015 --> 00:06:33,142 I'm gonna miss you so much. 128 00:06:33,226 --> 00:06:37,105 I guess I'll just have to get used to the idea of you leaving the nest. 129 00:06:37,188 --> 00:06:40,108 Nothing sadder than a 35-year-old bird leaving the nest. 130 00:06:42,652 --> 00:06:45,947 -It's gonna be okay, Mom. -Yes, I know. I know. 131 00:06:46,030 --> 00:06:48,116 I'm so happy for you, baby. 132 00:06:49,659 --> 00:06:50,827 [Frankie chuckles] 133 00:06:52,120 --> 00:06:55,331 Now, if you'll excuse me, this pee is starting without me. 134 00:06:55,414 --> 00:06:58,292 -Oh, wait! Wait! -No! No, no, no, wait! 135 00:06:58,376 --> 00:07:00,837 [Frankie] Don't go in! We're shooting a porno! 136 00:07:00,920 --> 00:07:02,004 Oh, God! 137 00:07:03,256 --> 00:07:04,549 Jesus, what happened? 138 00:07:05,383 --> 00:07:06,634 We're renovating! 139 00:07:06,717 --> 00:07:09,178 There's a tub on your kitchen island! 140 00:07:09,262 --> 00:07:10,888 I know! Isn't it great? 141 00:07:10,972 --> 00:07:13,391 The French call that a "cuisine de baignoire." 142 00:07:13,808 --> 00:07:15,726 -What's that mean? -"Tub kitchen." 143 00:07:16,769 --> 00:07:18,271 Where are your pipes? 144 00:07:18,354 --> 00:07:19,605 What's going on here, Mom? 145 00:07:19,689 --> 00:07:22,358 We had a situation with a contractor, but we're handling it. 146 00:07:22,442 --> 00:07:25,403 This does not look handled to me. I'm calling Bud. 147 00:07:25,486 --> 00:07:26,904 No, no, no, no, no! 148 00:07:26,988 --> 00:07:28,448 That's how that gets there! 149 00:07:28,531 --> 00:07:30,199 You're not telling nobody nothin'! 150 00:07:30,283 --> 00:07:31,868 No, I've got to tell somebody. 151 00:07:31,951 --> 00:07:33,119 Oh, grab an arm! 152 00:07:34,454 --> 00:07:37,790 So... you really like that Nadia girl, don't you? 153 00:07:37,874 --> 00:07:40,460 -Yeah. -She's real pretty. 154 00:07:40,543 --> 00:07:44,380 Yeah. Shame if she should happen to drown in a kitchen tub. 155 00:07:44,464 --> 00:07:46,215 A cuisine de baignoire? 156 00:07:46,757 --> 00:07:50,261 Look, Coyote, I have kept a lot of your secrets. 157 00:07:50,344 --> 00:07:51,846 You could keep one of mine. 158 00:07:52,263 --> 00:07:53,931 Fine. I won't tell Bud. 159 00:07:54,640 --> 00:07:55,641 Or anyone. 160 00:07:55,975 --> 00:07:57,393 Or anyone. 161 00:07:58,978 --> 00:08:02,899 Look, just promise me that you won't go upstairs until we know it's safe. 162 00:08:02,982 --> 00:08:03,900 -We promise. -Sure. 163 00:08:03,983 --> 00:08:06,611 And don't look outside. I'm gonna pee in the pool. 164 00:08:07,445 --> 00:08:09,405 -Here, take your phone. -[Coyote grunts] 165 00:08:13,117 --> 00:08:16,245 -Where are you going? -Oh, I have to get ready for the play. 166 00:08:16,329 --> 00:08:18,623 You can't go up there! We promised Coyote. 167 00:08:18,706 --> 00:08:21,459 Well, I have to look stunning, or people are gonna suspect something. 168 00:08:21,542 --> 00:08:23,336 You're already stunning! 169 00:08:23,878 --> 00:08:26,047 I mean, your hair has looked better. 170 00:08:26,130 --> 00:08:28,049 And actually, I don't love that outfit. 171 00:08:28,132 --> 00:08:29,967 Oh, God! Oh, God, my knee! 172 00:08:30,051 --> 00:08:31,844 Oh, my-- Oh! 173 00:08:32,345 --> 00:08:34,222 Oh, Grace! You've got to be more careful! 174 00:08:34,305 --> 00:08:35,640 [thuds] 175 00:08:36,641 --> 00:08:39,644 -Right this way. -The kids aren't gonna think twice 176 00:08:39,727 --> 00:08:41,312 about seeing you with a cane. 177 00:08:41,395 --> 00:08:43,272 They know you just had knee surgery. 178 00:08:43,356 --> 00:08:44,815 On the other knee. 179 00:08:44,899 --> 00:08:47,443 Now they're gonna think I'm totally crippled. 180 00:08:47,527 --> 00:08:50,363 For God's sake, Mallory's already sending me brochures of stair chairs. 181 00:08:50,446 --> 00:08:53,574 I saw. Did you know that the Motion-Glide XL 182 00:08:53,658 --> 00:08:56,827 climbs a ten-foot staircase in under 20 minutes? 183 00:08:56,911 --> 00:08:58,371 Stop reading those. 184 00:08:58,454 --> 00:09:00,206 But they're so glossy and sad. 185 00:09:00,289 --> 00:09:02,291 -These are your seats, ma'am. -Thank you. 186 00:09:02,375 --> 00:09:06,254 Thank you so much for... letting us in early. 187 00:09:07,129 --> 00:09:09,715 Oh, no need. We're happy to seat all of our elderly 188 00:09:09,799 --> 00:09:11,926 and special needs patrons in advance. 189 00:09:13,386 --> 00:09:16,013 Well consider it hush money and hush the eff up. 190 00:09:16,889 --> 00:09:18,182 Enjoy the show. 191 00:09:18,266 --> 00:09:21,894 Do you really think you're gonna be able to hide your crap knee from everyone? 192 00:09:21,978 --> 00:09:22,812 Yes! 193 00:09:22,895 --> 00:09:26,816 I'm planting myself here and I'm not moving it all night. 194 00:09:27,692 --> 00:09:29,902 What if there's a standing ovation? 195 00:09:29,986 --> 00:09:32,321 I'll cross that bridge when it never happens. 196 00:09:37,368 --> 00:09:39,161 Hold on. Hold on. 197 00:09:40,246 --> 00:09:42,456 I need to prepare myself for this nightmare. 198 00:09:42,540 --> 00:09:44,750 Well, I love musical theater. 199 00:09:45,251 --> 00:09:49,213 In eighth grade, I was the beatboxing wizard in The Bee Keeper's Promise. 200 00:09:49,589 --> 00:09:51,048 What the hell show was that? 201 00:09:51,132 --> 00:09:52,133 I wrote it. 202 00:09:52,758 --> 00:09:54,135 It was based on Macbeth. 203 00:09:55,845 --> 00:09:57,805 Sadly, not even dreading the musical theater part. 204 00:09:57,888 --> 00:09:59,557 I'm just dreading seeing my mother. 205 00:10:00,766 --> 00:10:01,976 She could surprise you. 206 00:10:02,893 --> 00:10:04,228 Like a surprise attack? 207 00:10:04,312 --> 00:10:08,441 -You're right. You walk in ahead of me. -She may not even be mad at you. 208 00:10:09,191 --> 00:10:11,944 Wow! You really don't know her. 209 00:10:12,028 --> 00:10:14,280 Yeah, but I really know her daughter. 210 00:10:15,698 --> 00:10:16,782 And? 211 00:10:17,241 --> 00:10:19,243 Oh, come on. You don't see the similarities? 212 00:10:19,702 --> 00:10:23,039 Someone who needs to be strong and resists getting help. 213 00:10:23,122 --> 00:10:26,250 And when it comes to having to deal with her feelings, she... 214 00:10:27,668 --> 00:10:28,836 self-medicates. 215 00:10:31,464 --> 00:10:33,591 I don't know what you're talking about right now, okay? 216 00:10:33,674 --> 00:10:36,052 But we really need to focus on strategy. 217 00:10:36,636 --> 00:10:38,846 When I approach her, if I say the word "kumquat," 218 00:10:38,929 --> 00:10:40,389 that means you have to lift me up 219 00:10:40,473 --> 00:10:42,558 and then fireman-carry me out of the theater. 220 00:10:44,143 --> 00:10:46,896 -How strong is that stuff? -It's very mild. 221 00:10:46,979 --> 00:10:48,689 But I've been high since breakfast. 222 00:10:56,697 --> 00:10:58,366 -Hi. -Mm. 223 00:11:04,705 --> 00:11:05,581 Oh. 224 00:11:05,956 --> 00:11:07,583 Are you trying to dodge me? 225 00:11:07,667 --> 00:11:08,959 I just walked in. 226 00:11:09,043 --> 00:11:11,712 When are you gonna bring me back to life? 227 00:11:11,796 --> 00:11:13,172 Frankie, I'm working on it. 228 00:11:13,255 --> 00:11:15,674 Great! Can you get it done by the time the show finishes? 229 00:11:15,758 --> 00:11:18,719 Well, the second act of The Music Man could use a few cuts, 230 00:11:18,803 --> 00:11:21,389 but this is the government we're talking about. 231 00:11:21,472 --> 00:11:22,473 Whatevs! 232 00:11:22,556 --> 00:11:27,103 I'm gonna need you to tell Bud that it's done and I am officially alive. 233 00:11:27,186 --> 00:11:28,729 I can't lie to my son. 234 00:11:28,813 --> 00:11:31,941 You were comfortable telling him that President Reagan wrote back to him 235 00:11:32,024 --> 00:11:34,985 and said, "I hear you. I've made some mistakes." 236 00:11:35,069 --> 00:11:36,570 He still has that letter framed! 237 00:11:36,654 --> 00:11:39,490 Yeah, well, dreams die hard in the big city, Sol. 238 00:11:39,573 --> 00:11:40,991 Just do it! 239 00:11:42,284 --> 00:11:43,702 [sighs] 240 00:11:45,996 --> 00:11:47,415 Are you okay, Dad? 241 00:11:48,290 --> 00:11:49,291 It's just... 242 00:11:50,543 --> 00:11:53,879 your mother wants me to lie to your brother about something. 243 00:11:54,964 --> 00:11:56,465 She got to you, too. 244 00:11:59,301 --> 00:12:01,595 -Hey, Mom. -Hey, honey. 245 00:12:01,679 --> 00:12:03,139 So, I'm trying out a new babysitter, 246 00:12:03,222 --> 00:12:05,433 and I wanted to sit on the aisle in case she calls. 247 00:12:05,516 --> 00:12:09,854 And she will. My children are heavily discussed on babysitter forums. 248 00:12:11,313 --> 00:12:12,523 So can I sit there? 249 00:12:12,606 --> 00:12:13,816 No. 250 00:12:14,567 --> 00:12:16,527 It's just I've never used this service before. 251 00:12:16,610 --> 00:12:17,486 No. 252 00:12:18,779 --> 00:12:20,531 Okay. Can you at least let me by? 253 00:12:20,614 --> 00:12:21,574 No. 254 00:12:22,283 --> 00:12:24,493 You're really gonna make me walk all the way around? 255 00:12:24,577 --> 00:12:25,453 Yes. 256 00:12:26,579 --> 00:12:28,956 Mom, is your knee still bothering you? 257 00:12:29,039 --> 00:12:32,501 Yes, Mallory, my knee is in terrible pain and I'm keeping it from you. 258 00:12:32,585 --> 00:12:37,006 It's all one big conspiracy to conceal my enfeeblement from my children. 259 00:12:40,509 --> 00:12:41,886 All right. 260 00:12:42,636 --> 00:12:43,804 Jeez. 261 00:12:45,890 --> 00:12:47,057 Sucker. 262 00:12:48,809 --> 00:12:52,021 -Look who I found wandering the lobby. -Ah. 263 00:12:52,104 --> 00:12:54,273 Your dad has some good news. 264 00:12:54,356 --> 00:12:55,399 Don't you, Sol? 265 00:12:55,858 --> 00:12:57,109 Yes. 266 00:12:58,277 --> 00:12:59,778 Wonderful news. 267 00:12:59,862 --> 00:13:03,324 It appears that the Social Security Administration 268 00:13:03,407 --> 00:13:07,369 received our letter about your mom's death mix-up. 269 00:13:07,453 --> 00:13:10,247 -[Frankie chuckles] -Good to know the post office still works. 270 00:13:10,331 --> 00:13:13,334 Uh... We sent it FedEx, but it is encouraging. 271 00:13:14,001 --> 00:13:15,002 Sol. 272 00:13:16,212 --> 00:13:19,298 It seems that everything is, 273 00:13:19,381 --> 00:13:21,133 -um... -I'm alive again. 274 00:13:21,217 --> 00:13:24,595 And fully capable and equipped for all your babysitting needs. 275 00:13:25,179 --> 00:13:28,182 You can have Faith with me and you can have faith in me. 276 00:13:28,807 --> 00:13:30,809 No, that didn't sound quite right. 277 00:13:32,686 --> 00:13:34,063 [Sol] Oh, boy. 278 00:13:34,480 --> 00:13:35,856 What's he doing here? 279 00:13:35,940 --> 00:13:37,733 Uh... Excuse me. 280 00:13:39,693 --> 00:13:40,611 Roy! You're here. 281 00:13:41,111 --> 00:13:42,321 Hey! [chuckles] 282 00:13:42,988 --> 00:13:45,157 Oh, I couldn't miss Robert's big night. 283 00:13:45,741 --> 00:13:46,825 Are you surprised? 284 00:13:47,868 --> 00:13:48,911 Little bit. 285 00:13:49,411 --> 00:13:51,330 Don't you know what this means? 286 00:13:51,413 --> 00:13:52,957 Everything's back to normal. 287 00:13:53,040 --> 00:13:56,502 Now Faith and I can use my rewards points from Red Lobster. 288 00:13:56,585 --> 00:13:58,504 And it's Summerfest. 289 00:13:59,004 --> 00:14:02,841 Mom, I am really happy you're legally alive again. 290 00:14:02,925 --> 00:14:04,301 I really am. 291 00:14:04,385 --> 00:14:06,720 But it still doesn't change what happened. 292 00:14:06,804 --> 00:14:08,681 But it never would've happened if-- 293 00:14:08,764 --> 00:14:11,267 You've got to stop blaming everything on being dead. 294 00:14:11,809 --> 00:14:15,312 You... You followed a truck to Mexico with my daughter. 295 00:14:15,396 --> 00:14:19,567 Okay, okay. I won't take any long road trips with Faith. 296 00:14:20,234 --> 00:14:22,862 -Mom-- -Okay, any trips! 297 00:14:22,945 --> 00:14:26,031 Look, we want you to see the baby as much as you want. 298 00:14:26,115 --> 00:14:27,950 Good! When can I babysit? 299 00:14:28,033 --> 00:14:31,620 I'm available every day 9:00 a.m. to midnight. 300 00:14:32,204 --> 00:14:34,456 Who am I kidding? Noon to midnight. 301 00:14:34,540 --> 00:14:36,375 You can babysit whenever... 302 00:14:36,709 --> 00:14:39,295 just as long as we're there, too. 303 00:14:42,131 --> 00:14:44,508 You don't want me to be alone with Faith? 304 00:14:45,134 --> 00:14:47,261 Mom, it's-- it's just after, you know-- 305 00:14:47,344 --> 00:14:49,680 I can take care of my grandchild. 306 00:14:49,763 --> 00:14:53,434 Actually, Allison and I are afraid you can't. 307 00:14:54,935 --> 00:14:55,936 What? 308 00:14:57,062 --> 00:14:58,981 Faith was fine. 309 00:14:59,398 --> 00:15:01,734 She was never in jeopardy. 310 00:15:02,443 --> 00:15:03,444 This time. 311 00:15:04,570 --> 00:15:05,613 Think about it. 312 00:15:06,155 --> 00:15:09,450 You would never be able to forgive yourself if something were to happen. 313 00:15:14,371 --> 00:15:15,414 I'm so sorry. 314 00:15:22,588 --> 00:15:24,506 Oh, God, I love community theater. 315 00:15:24,590 --> 00:15:27,217 When it's good, it's great. And when it's bad, I take pictures. 316 00:15:27,301 --> 00:15:29,011 You think Robert'll be excited I'm here? 317 00:15:29,094 --> 00:15:32,890 I think Robert will experience a range of emotions. 318 00:15:35,684 --> 00:15:37,603 [man] Everyone, places in five. 319 00:15:50,741 --> 00:15:53,744 Robert, I was just going over my to-do list 320 00:15:53,827 --> 00:15:57,331 and the only thing on there is "Make sure Robert doesn't screw this up for me." 321 00:15:58,123 --> 00:15:59,750 Can I check off that box? 322 00:15:59,833 --> 00:16:00,751 Look. 323 00:16:01,752 --> 00:16:03,879 -[man] Actors, places please! -That's Roy. 324 00:16:04,129 --> 00:16:06,256 -[gasps] -The guy I was telling you about. 325 00:16:06,340 --> 00:16:09,760 Oh, my. Now I see why you didn't give Sol the go-ahead. 326 00:16:11,345 --> 00:16:13,389 So why'd he go ahead and come to my show? 327 00:16:13,472 --> 00:16:15,391 Robert, you need to focus 328 00:16:15,474 --> 00:16:17,893 and take your mind off that absolutely stunning man 329 00:16:17,977 --> 00:16:20,354 who might be going commando sitting next to your husband. 330 00:16:20,437 --> 00:16:24,191 I know. I know. It's just... How am I supposed to ignore that? 331 00:16:24,274 --> 00:16:25,859 Don't ignore it. Use it. 332 00:16:25,943 --> 00:16:29,238 Let your rage and jealousy fuel your performance. 333 00:16:29,321 --> 00:16:31,156 If Sol's flirting with Roy, 334 00:16:31,240 --> 00:16:33,242 flirt harder through song. 335 00:16:33,325 --> 00:16:36,829 You're the Music Man, damn it. You can charm a whole town. 336 00:16:37,538 --> 00:16:39,123 I am the Music Man. 337 00:16:39,206 --> 00:16:41,000 I could charm the whole damn country. 338 00:16:41,417 --> 00:16:43,711 Let's just focus on the town. 339 00:16:46,880 --> 00:16:49,842 -There's two. Over-- -Actually, your mom is-- She's there. 340 00:16:52,177 --> 00:16:53,303 Hey, Mom. You okay? 341 00:16:53,679 --> 00:16:54,596 I'm fine. 342 00:16:54,680 --> 00:16:57,099 Cool. Cool. Um... 343 00:16:57,266 --> 00:17:01,311 I mean, are we okay? Because I know after that conversation last week-- 344 00:17:01,395 --> 00:17:02,354 I understand. 345 00:17:03,147 --> 00:17:06,650 Let's just have a good time tonight and you go ahead and get in your seat. 346 00:17:07,860 --> 00:17:09,069 So we're good? 347 00:17:09,820 --> 00:17:11,030 All good. 348 00:17:11,780 --> 00:17:14,116 Wow. Thanks, Mom. 349 00:17:16,410 --> 00:17:17,619 So, can we sneak by? 350 00:17:17,995 --> 00:17:18,829 No. 351 00:17:19,705 --> 00:17:21,582 -Seriously, can we? -No. 352 00:17:21,957 --> 00:17:24,293 -You want us to walk all the way around? -Yes. 353 00:17:24,376 --> 00:17:25,377 Oh, my... 354 00:17:25,919 --> 00:17:27,212 -Kumquat. -Huh? 355 00:17:27,296 --> 00:17:28,297 Forget it. 356 00:17:33,093 --> 00:17:34,261 What's the matter? 357 00:17:34,803 --> 00:17:37,806 Bud doesn't trust me to be alone with the baby. 358 00:17:38,807 --> 00:17:42,102 When I watch Faith, someone needs to watch me. 359 00:17:42,186 --> 00:17:44,897 Oh, my God, Frankie. That's terrible. 360 00:17:47,107 --> 00:17:48,567 And now this. 361 00:17:48,650 --> 00:17:50,736 ♪ Our children's children Gonna have trouble ♪ 362 00:17:50,819 --> 00:17:54,198 ♪ Trouble, trouble, trouble, trouble ♪ 363 00:17:54,698 --> 00:17:56,325 Mothers of River City! 364 00:17:56,408 --> 00:17:58,452 Heed that warning before it's too late. 365 00:17:58,535 --> 00:18:01,747 Watch for the tell-tale signs of corruption. 366 00:18:01,830 --> 00:18:03,791 ♪ Trouble, trouble, trouble, trouble ♪ 367 00:18:03,874 --> 00:18:05,542 The minute your son leaves the house, 368 00:18:05,626 --> 00:18:08,921 does he re-buckle his knickerbockers below the knee? 369 00:18:09,004 --> 00:18:11,173 Is there a nicotine stain on his index finger? 370 00:18:11,256 --> 00:18:13,675 A dime novel hidden in the corn crib? 371 00:18:13,759 --> 00:18:17,554 Is he starting to memorize jokes from Captain Billy's Whiz Bang? 372 00:18:17,638 --> 00:18:20,682 Are certain words creeping into his conversation? 373 00:18:20,766 --> 00:18:21,809 Words like... 374 00:18:22,184 --> 00:18:24,937 "swell" and "so's your old man"? 375 00:18:25,020 --> 00:18:27,106 -[laughter] -Well, if so, my friends... 376 00:18:27,189 --> 00:18:28,565 -♪ You got trouble ♪ -♪ Oh, we got trouble ♪ 377 00:18:28,649 --> 00:18:30,484 -♪ Right here in River City ♪ -♪ Right here in River City ♪ 378 00:18:30,567 --> 00:18:32,277 ♪ With a capital T And that rhymes with P ♪ 379 00:18:32,361 --> 00:18:34,154 -♪ And that stands for pool ♪ -♪ That stands for pool ♪ 380 00:18:34,238 --> 00:18:35,823 -♪ We surely got trouble ♪ -♪ We surely got trouble ♪ 381 00:18:35,906 --> 00:18:37,658 -♪ Right here in River City ♪ -♪ Right here ♪ 382 00:18:37,741 --> 00:18:40,369 ♪ Remember the Maine Plymouth Rock, and the Golden Rule ♪ 383 00:18:40,452 --> 00:18:41,912 ♪ Our children's children Gonna have trouble ♪ 384 00:18:41,995 --> 00:18:44,748 ♪ Oh-ho, we got trouble We're in terrible, terrible trouble ♪ 385 00:18:44,915 --> 00:18:47,459 ♪ That game with the 15 numbered balls Is the devil's tool ♪ 386 00:18:47,543 --> 00:18:48,794 ♪ Devil's tool ♪ 387 00:18:48,877 --> 00:18:50,254 ♪ Oh, yes, we got Trouble, trouble, trouble ♪ 388 00:18:50,337 --> 00:18:52,464 ♪ Oh, yes, we got trouble here We got big, big trouble ♪ 389 00:18:52,548 --> 00:18:53,674 -♪ With a T ♪ -♪ With a capital T ♪ 390 00:18:53,757 --> 00:18:55,801 -♪ And that rhymes with P ♪ -♪ That rhymes with P ♪ 391 00:18:55,884 --> 00:19:01,014 -♪ And that stands for pool ♪ -♪ That stands for pool ♪ 392 00:19:01,098 --> 00:19:04,059 [cheering and applause] 393 00:19:06,728 --> 00:19:08,272 Whoo-hoo! 394 00:19:13,902 --> 00:19:15,988 I think that might have been meant for me. 395 00:19:16,071 --> 00:19:17,197 You want to fight for it? 396 00:19:17,281 --> 00:19:19,324 -[Roy laughs] -Ha, ha. 397 00:19:20,993 --> 00:19:22,786 [upbeat tune on piano] 398 00:19:27,291 --> 00:19:29,376 -He was so good! -He was! 399 00:19:29,459 --> 00:19:31,503 Almost makes me forget that thing he did. 400 00:19:35,632 --> 00:19:37,384 Mom, do you mind if I just sneak past you? 401 00:19:37,467 --> 00:19:39,595 Do you mind showing your father some goddamn respect 402 00:19:39,678 --> 00:19:40,888 and staying in your seat? 403 00:19:40,971 --> 00:19:42,264 Yeah, sit down. 404 00:19:42,848 --> 00:19:43,974 Jesus. 405 00:19:57,696 --> 00:20:00,866 ♪ Seventy-six trombones Led the big parade ♪ 406 00:20:00,949 --> 00:20:04,411 ♪ With 110 cornets close at hand ♪ 407 00:20:04,494 --> 00:20:08,707 ♪ They were followed by rows and rows Of the finest virtuosos ♪ 408 00:20:08,790 --> 00:20:11,668 ♪ The dream of every famous band ♪ 409 00:20:11,752 --> 00:20:14,796 ♪ Seventy-six trombones Hit the counter point ♪ 410 00:20:14,880 --> 00:20:17,424 Oh, audience participation! 411 00:20:17,507 --> 00:20:19,760 Oh, quick, deck me in the face. 412 00:20:20,886 --> 00:20:23,555 -May I have this march, ma'am? -No, thank you. 413 00:20:23,931 --> 00:20:25,182 Come on, join the band! 414 00:20:25,265 --> 00:20:27,768 You touch me again and I'll break your arms, too. 415 00:20:32,356 --> 00:20:34,024 [chatter] 416 00:20:40,822 --> 00:20:44,493 Looks like you've directed Robert towards another Tappy-worthy performance. 417 00:20:44,576 --> 00:20:46,995 Oh, it took everything I have. 418 00:20:48,163 --> 00:20:50,207 I hope it was worth my two broken legs. 419 00:20:50,290 --> 00:20:53,126 Oh, stop. I don't care about awards. 420 00:20:54,294 --> 00:20:57,172 -Well, you were amazing, obviously. -Oh. 421 00:20:57,714 --> 00:21:00,634 -I smell another Tappy. -Oh, get out of here. 422 00:21:00,717 --> 00:21:01,593 [both chuckle] 423 00:21:01,677 --> 00:21:02,761 You know, it's um... 424 00:21:03,178 --> 00:21:06,390 it's no wonder you carried that show. You sure have the shoulders for it. 425 00:21:07,808 --> 00:21:10,644 Well, actually, I'm better known for my calves. 426 00:21:10,727 --> 00:21:11,645 Oh? 427 00:21:13,230 --> 00:21:14,564 Are Grace and Mom here yet? 428 00:21:14,648 --> 00:21:16,108 Oh, they're not coming. 429 00:21:16,191 --> 00:21:18,402 Mom's probably still sitting in the theater. 430 00:21:18,485 --> 00:21:19,987 Yeah. What was up with that? 431 00:21:20,487 --> 00:21:22,906 That was so weird they didn't want to leave with us. 432 00:21:22,990 --> 00:21:24,950 Maybe your mom's waiting for a scooter cart. 433 00:21:25,409 --> 00:21:28,829 Oh, my God. Can you imagine my mom on one of those scooters? 434 00:21:30,163 --> 00:21:31,164 Yeah. 435 00:21:33,208 --> 00:21:34,501 -[Brianna] What? -[Barry] What? 436 00:21:34,584 --> 00:21:35,669 -What? -What? 437 00:21:36,169 --> 00:21:39,131 -Shit. Not... -What? "Shit"? 438 00:21:39,214 --> 00:21:42,384 -What? Spill the shit, Barry. -[sighs] 439 00:21:42,467 --> 00:21:45,929 Look, she told me not to tell you, but I was at the hardware store 440 00:21:46,013 --> 00:21:50,642 and I saw your mom and... she had to use one of those scooter carts. 441 00:21:50,976 --> 00:21:53,603 Our mother is not a scooter cart person. 442 00:21:53,687 --> 00:21:57,274 Yeah, well she was this day and she was swerving all over the place, you know... 443 00:21:57,357 --> 00:21:59,860 -drunk. -Okay. Hilarious. 444 00:21:59,943 --> 00:22:01,778 But why didn't she want you to tell me? 445 00:22:01,862 --> 00:22:02,863 I believe the quote was, 446 00:22:02,946 --> 00:22:06,450 "She's mean, she's judgmental, and she'll put me in a home." 447 00:22:06,533 --> 00:22:07,743 -She's got you pegged. -Yeah. 448 00:22:08,452 --> 00:22:11,038 -She also ran into a cop car. -What? 449 00:22:11,121 --> 00:22:12,873 She hit a cop car? 450 00:22:12,956 --> 00:22:14,958 -Even I never did that. -Yes, you did. 451 00:22:15,042 --> 00:22:17,794 -Oh, yes, I did. -Should we be worried about her? 452 00:22:18,295 --> 00:22:19,880 -Yes. -No. 453 00:22:19,963 --> 00:22:21,131 She's fine. 454 00:22:21,214 --> 00:22:22,674 She has Frankie. 455 00:22:23,425 --> 00:22:25,093 Uh, well, she's not really any help. 456 00:22:25,177 --> 00:22:28,305 I mean, she just got lost following an ice cream truck. 457 00:22:28,388 --> 00:22:30,766 Isn't that, like, every other Tuesday with her? 458 00:22:30,849 --> 00:22:34,686 This time she had my daughter and got stranded at the Mexican border. 459 00:22:35,103 --> 00:22:37,230 -Ooh. That's bad. -Wow. 460 00:22:37,564 --> 00:22:40,942 Yeah. Yeah. Whole new level of bad. 461 00:22:41,735 --> 00:22:43,278 What is going on with them? 462 00:22:49,076 --> 00:22:51,536 Coyote, why so quiet? 463 00:22:51,953 --> 00:22:52,913 -Huh? -Hmm? 464 00:22:56,166 --> 00:22:59,711 Hey, uh, you guys ever do that thing where you stretch, 465 00:22:59,795 --> 00:23:01,129 and then your head gets dizzy, 466 00:23:01,213 --> 00:23:04,841 and you see those little pieces of tin foil flying around? 467 00:23:04,925 --> 00:23:06,259 Coyote, what do you know? 468 00:23:07,969 --> 00:23:09,513 Historically, very little. 469 00:23:20,023 --> 00:23:22,526 Hey, there you are, stranger. Want something good in your mouth? 470 00:23:22,859 --> 00:23:23,693 Pardon? 471 00:23:24,069 --> 00:23:24,986 Here. 472 00:23:25,695 --> 00:23:27,447 -Mmm. -Mmm. 473 00:23:27,531 --> 00:23:28,448 It's good, right? 474 00:23:28,532 --> 00:23:32,202 Robert, were you even listening to my colonoscopy story? 475 00:23:33,703 --> 00:23:35,163 They're eating cake. 476 00:23:36,706 --> 00:23:37,541 [chuckles] 477 00:23:38,416 --> 00:23:41,086 Cake is how my colonoscopy story started. 478 00:23:41,586 --> 00:23:44,965 You know how you're not supposed to eat before a colonoscopy? 479 00:23:45,048 --> 00:23:46,258 Well, I did. 480 00:23:47,175 --> 00:23:48,677 And I lied about it. 481 00:23:48,760 --> 00:23:50,846 It all started when I... 482 00:23:52,889 --> 00:23:55,809 Liked the show, but I wish there'd been more marching. 483 00:23:56,226 --> 00:23:58,687 The marching was a nice distraction. 484 00:23:59,062 --> 00:24:03,775 I kept thinking how I'm never going to be alone with my grandchild again. 485 00:24:03,859 --> 00:24:04,860 Yeah. 486 00:24:05,944 --> 00:24:09,239 -Rats! -Yeah, rats. Rats to this whole day. 487 00:24:09,322 --> 00:24:10,490 No, I saw a rat! 488 00:24:11,199 --> 00:24:13,118 Ah! Grace, there's a rat! 489 00:24:13,201 --> 00:24:14,703 Take the high ground! Ah! 490 00:24:14,786 --> 00:24:18,707 -Oh, God! My knee! [wailing] -Get over! I'm sorry! I'm sorry! 491 00:24:18,790 --> 00:24:20,083 [Grace] Ooh! God! 492 00:24:21,793 --> 00:24:24,212 You know, I uh... I should have warned you, 493 00:24:25,046 --> 00:24:26,965 I'm always the last one to leave. 494 00:24:27,924 --> 00:24:28,800 That's okay. 495 00:24:28,884 --> 00:24:30,343 We were just leaving, too. 496 00:24:31,052 --> 00:24:33,054 What am I saying? We live here. [chuckles] 497 00:24:33,138 --> 00:24:34,181 We do. 498 00:24:35,640 --> 00:24:37,726 We sit in the living room a lot. 499 00:24:38,685 --> 00:24:40,312 You guys are adorable. 500 00:24:46,026 --> 00:24:47,235 Have a great night. 501 00:24:53,366 --> 00:24:54,576 [door closes] 502 00:24:55,535 --> 00:24:56,703 [exhales] 503 00:24:58,079 --> 00:24:59,623 That Roy... [chuckles] 504 00:24:59,706 --> 00:25:00,707 Yeah. 505 00:25:03,251 --> 00:25:05,378 He really loved your dancing. 506 00:25:05,462 --> 00:25:06,463 Well... 507 00:25:07,964 --> 00:25:09,132 Why wouldn't he? 508 00:25:10,592 --> 00:25:12,886 I didn't even know you could dance like that. 509 00:25:13,511 --> 00:25:17,682 Well, he thinks that you are the most interesting man in the world. 510 00:25:17,766 --> 00:25:18,934 Well... 511 00:25:19,017 --> 00:25:20,393 Why wouldn't he? 512 00:25:21,853 --> 00:25:22,938 You are. 513 00:25:25,148 --> 00:25:26,900 What was that ear thing? 514 00:25:27,901 --> 00:25:28,860 I don't know. 515 00:25:41,581 --> 00:25:43,875 It actually feels kind of nice. 516 00:25:47,254 --> 00:25:48,171 It does. 517 00:26:03,353 --> 00:26:05,397 -Oh, there he is! -Oh, God! 518 00:26:05,480 --> 00:26:07,899 You got a lighter? We'll make a Molotov cocktail! 519 00:26:07,983 --> 00:26:09,901 Yeah, what could go wrong with that plan? 520 00:26:09,985 --> 00:26:12,904 Fine! Grab the fruit bowl. 521 00:26:12,988 --> 00:26:14,322 We'll trap him. 522 00:26:14,406 --> 00:26:17,075 Fast, before he figures out our plan! 523 00:26:18,368 --> 00:26:20,370 -Hold onto me. -Okay. 524 00:26:20,453 --> 00:26:23,081 -Hold on. Hold me. Hold me tight. -[squeaking] 525 00:26:23,164 --> 00:26:25,458 Ha, ha! We're gonna take you down tonight, motherfucker. 526 00:26:25,542 --> 00:26:26,543 [Bud] Mom? 527 00:26:31,172 --> 00:26:33,008 Oh, we got trouble. 528 00:26:37,053 --> 00:26:39,014 ♪ Back to sin again ♪ 529 00:26:39,097 --> 00:26:41,016 ♪ Must be fate ♪ 530 00:26:41,099 --> 00:26:45,603 ♪ The wait was all day ♪ 531 00:26:45,687 --> 00:26:49,524 ♪ Black acts to amend at the gate ♪ 532 00:26:49,607 --> 00:26:54,112 ♪ Awaiting new state ♪ 533 00:26:54,195 --> 00:26:59,117 ♪ Something perished Past and gone away ♪ 534 00:27:02,746 --> 00:27:08,084 ♪ And nothing ever lasts that hesitates ♪ 535 00:27:10,420 --> 00:27:15,175 ♪ 'Cause I know These days are calling out ♪ 536 00:27:15,258 --> 00:27:19,804 ♪ The symbol sets in the red skyline ♪ 537 00:27:19,888 --> 00:27:21,348 ♪ These... ♪ 538 00:27:21,431 --> 00:27:22,724 [woman] Okay, good night.