THE COST OF EGGS HAS BEEN SOARING
ACROSS THE COUNTRY. >> THE DRAMATIC RISE COMES AS
MILLIONS OF AMERICANS ARE STRUGGLING WITH THE HIGH COST OF
INFLATION, AND CALIFORNIA EGGS COST SURGE TO A WHOPPING $7.37
LAST WEEK. >> SO ANYONE OUT THERE WHO STILL
ISN'T CLEAR ABOUT HOW EXPENSIVE EGGS ARE, OKAY, LAST TIME, THIS
IS AN EGG. THIS IS A FRYING PAN.
THERE GOES MY KID'S COLLEGE FUND.
ANY QUESTIONS? HONEY, WE GOT TO SELL THE CAR.
>> Announcer: IT'S "THE LATE SHOW WITH STEPHEN COLBERT!"
TONIGHT: BUMP SET PSYCH!
PLUS, STEPHEN WELCOMES: JESSE EISENBERG
AND ATSUKO OKATSUKA FEATURING LOUIS CATO AND THE
LATE SHOW BAND! AND NOW, LIVE ON TAPE FROM THE
ED SULLIVAN THEATER IN NEW YORK CITY, IT'S STEPHEN COLBERT!
(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE). >> Stephen: HEY.
YOU KNOW WHAT, (APPLAUSE)
THANK YOU. HAPPY TUESDAY, HAPPY TUESDAY,
HAPPY TUESDAY. HAPPY, HAPPY.
THANK, EVERYBODY, PLEASE HAV A SEAT.
WELCOME, WELCOME, DOWN HERE DOWN HERE, UP THERE, ALL AROUND
THE WORLD. WELCOME TO "THE LATE SHOW."
I'M YOUR HOST, STEPHEN COLBERT. (APPLAUSE)
AND FOLKS, AS CRAZY AS THE WORLD SEEMS--
AND SHE DO SEEM CRAZY. IT'S COMFORTING EVERY SO OFTEN
TO BE REMINDED THAT ACTIONS STILL HAVE CONSEQUENCES.
AND EVEN WHEN THOSE CONSEQUENCES ARE AWFUL, IT'S NICE TO KNOW YOU
WEREN'T CRAZY WHEN YOU POINTED OUT THAT THOSE CONSEQUENCES WERE
CAREENING DOWN THE HIGHWAY TOWARD ALL OF US LIKE A
JACKKNIFED MANURE SPREADER. CASE IN POINT: FOR YEARS, THE
G.O.P. SAID NOTHING WHILE THE FORMER PRESIDENT TOLD OVER
30,000 VERIFIABLE LIES. THAT'S 20 A DAY.
I DON'T ALWAYS GET IN THAT MANY STEPS A DAY.
SO, NO ONE SHOULD BE SURPRISED WHEN THAT PARTY IS THE ONE THAT
PRODUCES NEWLY-ELECTED REPRESENTATIVE GEORGE SANTOS,
SEEN HERE ASKING, "ARE YOU THERE, GOD?
IT'S ME, L.L. COOL J." WE ALREADY KNEW SANTOS LIED
ABOUT ATTENDING BARUCH COLLEGE AND BEING ON THE VOLLEYBALL
TEAM, BUT A RECENTLY-SURFACED RADIO CLIP FROM 2020
DEMONSTRATES JUST HOW MUCH SANTOS LOVES SPREADING HIS LIES.
HE DOES IT WITH A REAL JOIE'DECEIVE.
>> WHEN I WAS AT BARUCH, WE WERE THE NUMBER ONE VOLLEYBALL TEAM.
>> DID YOU GRADUATE FROM BARUCH? DID YOU GRADUATE FORM THERE?
>> YEAH, I DID. I DID.
>> SO DID I. SO DID I.
>> OH, VERY COOL. GREAT SCHOOL.
GREAT INSTITUTION. VERY LIBERAL, BUT VERY GOOD
PROFESSORS. >> Stephen: (AS SANTOS)
"OH, YEAH, GREAT SCHOOL. GREAT PROFESSORS...
DUMBLEDORE, McGONAGLE, THE NUTTY."
SANTOS CONTINUED TO FABRICATE, TELLING A STORY WITH A SAD
MADE-UP ENDING: >> WE WENT TO PLAY AGAINST
HARVARD, YALE, AND WE SLAYED THEM.
(LAUGHTER) WE SLAYED THEM.
WE WERE CHAMPIONS ACROSS THE ENTIRE NORTHEAST CORRIDOR.
EVERY SCHOOL THAT CAME UP AGAINST US, THEY WERE SHAKING AT
THE TIME. LOOK, I SACRIFICED BOTH MY KNEES
AND GOT VERY NICE KNEE REPLACEMENTS FROM H.S.S. PLAYING
VOLLEYBALL. THAT'S HOW SERIOUS I TOOK THE
GAME. >> Stephen: IT'S TRUE.
DOCTORS SAY, ONE OF THE MOST DANGEROUS SPORTS IS IMAGINARY
VOLLEYBALL. BUT SANTOS DIDN'T STOP WITH A
- - TO PRETEND, BUT SANTOS DIDN'T STOP WITH A
B.S. IN B.S. IN A RECENTLY UNEARTHED 2020
PODCAST, SANTOS BRAGGED ABOUT GRADUATING FROM N.Y.U. WITH AN
M.B.A. IF YOU WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT
HIS INSPIRING TIME IN GRAD SCHOOL, YOU CAN READ HIS MEMOIR:
"I AM MALALA." NEVER GETS TIRED OF THOSE, NEVER
GETS TIRED OF THOSE JOKES. HERE'S SANTOS'S INSPIRING
MESSAGE ON THE SHOW: >> I PUT MYSELF THROUGH COLLEGE
AND GOT AN M.B.A. FROM N.Y.U., AND I HAVE ZERO DEBT.
IT'S HARD WORK. YOU GOT TO DO IT.
>> Stephen: IT IS A LOT OF WORK. YOU TRY GETTING A GRADUATE
DEGREE WITH NO KNEES. MOLD ON, I'M COMING, I'M LATE
FOR CLASS. I'M COMING.
(APPLAUSE)
HE ENDED THE INTERVIEW WITH A POWERFUL MESSAGE TO THE YOUTH:
>> NOTHING COMES FOR FREE. NOTHING IN LIFE IS FREE.
AND THE HARDER YOU WORK FOR SOMETHING, THE MORE YOU WANT IT,
AND THE MORE YOU WANT IT, THE MORE REWARDING IT IS.
I HATE LOOKING AT YOUTH TODAY AND SEEING THEM SITTING ON THEIR
BEHINDS AND ACTING LIKE, UGH, YOU KNOW, THIS IS SO HARD.
>> Stephen: YEAH, YOU LAZY KIDS! HOW MANY ACCOMPLISHMENTS DID YOU
MAKE UP TODAY? ONE, TWO?
GEORGE SANTOS TELLS TEN LIES BEFORE BREAKFAST!
(APPLAUSE) NO, I'M MAD.
YOU THINK IT'S EASY KITING CHECKS AND KEEPING TRACK OF
WHICH SPORT YOU PRETENDED TO PLAY AT WHICH COLLEGE YOU
PRETENDED TO ATTEND? NO!
BUT YOU'VE GOT TO DIG DOWN LIKE GEORGE DID, SO HE COULD MAKE HIS
PARENTS PROUD! HIS SWEET, SWEET PARENTS,
ROSA PARKS, AND THE FIDDLER ON THE ROOF.
BOTH OF WHOM WERE STRANGLED BY HITLER ON THE SHORES OF
IWO JIMA! SAVE THEM A-W-A.
OF COURSE-- IS THIS MIC UPSIDE DOWN?
IT S THE [BLEEP] MIC'S UPSIDE DOWN, THERE YOU GO, HELLO?
THEY LOVE IT WHEN I DO THAT UP IN THE BOOTH.
OF COURSE, IN ALL OF THAT, SANTOS WAS JUST EMULATING THE
FORMER PRESIDENT, THE LEADER OF THE G.O.P., WHO WAS DEFENDED BY
HIS PARTY AND REWARDED FOR ALL OF HIS LIES.
BUT, DON'T TAKE MY WORD FOR IT. LISTEN TO WHAT SANTOS SAID AFTER
LOSING HIS FIRST RUN FOR CONGRESS.
HERE HE IS ON JANUARY 5th OF 2021, AT A STOP THE STEAL RALLY:
>> THEY DID TO ME WHAT THEY DID TO DONALD J. TRUMP.
THEY STOLE MY ELECTION. >> Stephen: AND HE KNOWS
STEALING WHEN HE SEES IT, BECAUSE-- AND THIS IS TRUE--
HE MADE THAT SPEECH IN A SCARF HE STOLE FROM HIS ROOMMATE.
BLAWS PLAWS, THIS SCARF IS A METAPHOR FOR--
SO, HE SAYS IT ON JANUARY 5th. JANUARY 6th THERE'S A VIOLENT
INSURRECTION AT THE CAPITOL. AND SINCE THAT DAY, THE MAJORITY
OF REPUBLICAN POLITICIANS HAVE SUPPORTED THE FORMER PRESIDENT'S
BIG LIE ALL ACROSS AMERICA, WHILE SIMULTANEOUSLY MAKING IT
EASIER AND EASIER TO GET GUNS WITHOUT A LICENSE.
WHICH IS WHY, LOGICALLY, ALL THAT WOULD HAVE THIS
CONSEQUENCE: YESTERDAY IN NEW MEXICO, A
FORMER 2022 REPUBLICAN CANDIDATE, WHO BELIEVES HIS
ELECTION WAS STOLEN, WAS ARRESTED IN SHOOTINGS AT
DEMOCRATS' HOMES. HIS NAME IS SOLOMON PENA, SEEN
HERE BEING TAKEN INTO CUSTODY BY BEN AFFLECK AND THAT GUY FROM
"RENO 911." KEEP IN MIND, PENA CLAIMS HIS
RACE WAS STOLEN BY THE INCUMBENT DEMOCRAT EVEN THOUGH HE LOST BY
48 PERCENTAGE POINTS. THAT'S A PRETTY DECISIVE WIN.
48 POINTS. THOSE ARE THE KIND OF NUMBERS
YOU SEE WHEN THE KANSAS CITY CHIEFS GO UP AGAINST THE GOLDEN
GIRLS. THANK YOU.
POLICE SAY PENA HIRED FOUR MEN TO ATTACK THE DEMOCRATS, AND
SENT THEM TEXT MESSAGES WITH ADDRESSES WHERE HE WANTED THEM
TO SHOOT AT THE HOMES, MAKING HIM THE PLOT'S MASTERMIND.
BECAUSE NOTHING SAYS "MASTERMIND" LIKE LEAVING AN
INCANDESCENT TRAIL OF DIGITAL EVIDENCE.
(AS MASTERMIND) "I'M TEXTING YOU ALL THE ILLEGAL
DETAILS OF THE CRIME WE ARE DOING.
ALSO, WHAT'S YOUR VENMO? I'LL PAY YOU WITH THE MEMO
'CRAZY FACE, EXPLOSION.' NOW, ON THREE, EVERYONE PUT YOUR
FINGERPRINTS ON THIS GUN!" (APPLAUSE)
FURN TURNS OUT, NO SURPRISE, PENA WAS A JANUARY
6th ATTENDEE, AND HAD BEEN CONVICTED OF "FELONIES THAT
INCLUDE BURGLARY, LARCENY, RECEIVING STOLEN PROPERTY AND
CONTRIBUTING TO THE DELINQUENCY OF A MINOR."
SO, EVIDENTLY, AT THIS POINT, NO ONE IS VETTING G.O.P.
CANDIDATES FOR OFFICE. I LOOK FORWARD TO 2024
PRESIDENTIAL NOMINEE BUFFALO BILL.
YOU KNOW HIS SLOGAN: "IT PUTS THE BALLOT IN THE BOX."
OF COURSE, TO GET THAT NOMINATION, BUFFALO BILL IS
GOING TO HAVE TO BEAT A HOST OF OTHER G.O.P. CRAZY CANDIDATES.
FOR INSTANCE, FLORIDA GOVERNOR AND KID WATCHING MOM AND DAD
BRING HOME HIS NEW BABY BROTHER, RON DeSANTIS.
IN RECENT POLLS OF G.O.P. VOTERS, DeSANTIS HAS A LEAD OVER
THE FORMER PRESIDENT. BUT HE'S MISSING ONE THING:
INSIDERS SAY THAT FOR ALL HIS SMARTS AND SHREWDNESS, HE LACKS
CHARM. COME ON!
YOU'RE TELLING ME THIS MAN LACKS CHARM?
HE'S GOT THE SMOOTH STYLE OF A NON-PLAYABLE CHARACTER IN A
PLAYSTATION 2 GAME! (APPLAUSE)
HEY, HEY. "GET OUT OF MY BANK WITH YOUR
SKATEBOARD, TONY HAWK!" APPARENTLY, DeSANTIS IS TURNING
OFF REPUBLICAN DONORS BECAUSE HE HAS AN AVERSION TO SCHMOOZING.
AS ONE FLORIDA POLITICAL LEADER DESCRIBED THE FEELINGS DONORS
HAVE WHEN THEY ACTUALLY MEET THE CANDIDATE:
"RON IS AT HIS BEST ON PAPER. THEN YOU MEET HIM, AND YOU SAY,
'OH, MY GOSH'." IT'S TRUE.
DeSANTIS IS BEST ON PAPER. SPECIFICALLY, THE ROLL BY
TOILET. (APPLAUSE)
IN LIGHTER NEWS, THE TALIBAN. THEY'VE BEEN MAKING HEADLINES
THIS WEEK, AFTER THEY STARTED BUYING BLUE CHECK MARKS ON
TWITTER. THAT'S NOT GOOD.
NOW TWITTER MIGHT BE FULL OF MEN SAYING AWFUL THINGS ABOUT WOMEN!
SO FAR, AT LEAST TWO TALIBAN LEADERS HAVE TAKEN ELON MUSK UP
ON HIS OFFER TO PAY $8 A MONTH FOR VERIFICATION, INCLUDING THE
HEAD OF THE TALIBAN'S DEPARTMENT FOR "ACCESS TO INFORMATION."
YOU KNOW THEIR MOTTO: "NO!"
NOW, IF YOU THINK GIVING A TERRORIST ORGANIZATION OFFICIAL
STATUS IS A LITTLE SHADY, YOU'RE NOT ALONE.
THERE WAS A HUGE BACKLASH, LEADING TO THE TWITTER VERIFIED
CHECK MARKS BOUGHT BY THE TALIBAN BEING REMOVED.
GREAT! NO WE WON'T KNOW IF THEY THE
ONES SELLING THE TWEETS. "A WOMAN'S PLACE IS IN THE HOME,
IN OBEDIENCE TO HER HUSBAND"-- IS THAT TALIBAN?
NOPE-- SAM ALITO. WE'VE GOT A GREAT SHOW FOR YOU
TONIGHT! MY GUESTS ARE JESSE EISENBERG
AND COMEDIAN ATSUKO OKATSUKA BUT WHEN WE COME BACK,
"MEANWHILE!" JOIN US, WON'T YOU?
>> Stephen: GIVE IT UP FOR THE BAND, EVERYBODY.
LOUIS CATO. ALL RIGHT WHAT'S WHAT'S UP?
THANKS, EVERYBODY. PLEASE.
HAVE A SEAT. , I'LL TAKE IT THANK YOU VERY
MUCH. LOUIS, LOUIS, MY FRIEND,
MYCAMPADRE, TONIGHT A COUPLE DLIELTFUL GUESTS, A GUEST WE
HAVEN'T HAD FOR SEVEN YEARS JESSE ISENBERG IS GOING TO BE
OUT-- EISENBERG. AND FROM HIS TV SHOW FLEISHMAN
IS IN TROUBLE. AND COMEDIAN ATSUKO OKATSUKA
WILL BE OUT HERE, VERY FUNNY. BUT BEFORE WE GET TO THAT I WANT
TO LET PEOPLE KNOW, WHAT WONDERFUL PEOPLE YOU ARE, BEFORE
THE COUNTRIES MALL-- CHRISTMAS HOLIDAYS TO SUPPORT THE VITAL
MISSION OF FEEDING THE PEOPLE OF UKRAINE, AND FOR COUNTRIES FOR
THESE DISPLAYED DISSH DR DISPLACED PEOPLE FROM THE WAR,
WE INTRODUCED A LINE OF IS POTATOE MERCHANDISE.
IS POTATOE. YOU GOT THE SHIRTS, YOU GOT
SWEATSHIRTS. YOU GOT THE HOODIES, PERFECT
THIS TIME OF YEAR. AND FOR VALENTINE'S DAY, HOW
ABOUT A MUG. HOW ABOUT A MUG FOR YOUR LOVED
ONE. JUST SINCE CHRISTMAS Y'ALL HAVE
RAISED WITH THIS MERCHANDISE, $275,000 FOR WORLD CENTRAL
KITCHEN, ALL OF WHICH GOES TO FEEDING THE PEOPLE OF UKRAINE,
AND THOSE DISPLACED BY THIS TERRIBLE WAR.
SO THANK YOU. LET'S GET THAT TO HALF A
MILLION, ALL RIGHT? LET'S MAKE THIS A HAPPIER NEW
YEAR THAN 2022 FOR THESE LOVELY PEOPLE.
THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR EVERYTHING THAT YOU HAVE DONE.
NOW FOLKS, IF YOU WATCH THIS SHOW,
YOU KNOW I SPEND MOST OF MY TIME RIGHT OVER THERE, HARVESTING THE
DAY'S RIPEST NEWS BEANS, CAREFULLY DE-PULPING AND
ANAEROBICALLY FERMENTING THEM TO BREW FOR YOU THE EXQUISITE CUP
OF EXCELSA MACHIATO THAT IS MY MONOLOGUE.
BUT SOMETIMES, SOMETIMES, FOLKS, JUST SOMETIMES, I WAKE UP BEING
SPOONED BY A RACCOON INSIDE AN ABANDONED JAMBA JUICE, TOSS
INDUSTRIAL SEPTIC CLEANER, FOUR LOKO, AND BLENDER
LUBRICANTS INTO A BROKEN VITAMIX, THEN POUR YOU THE
PAINT-STRIPPING DEMON-SWILL OF NEWS THAT IS MY SEGMENT:
"MEANWHILE!" (APPLAUSE).
>> Stephen: THAT'S THE ONLY SWIL I NEED, SOME FRESH CUP OF
HEALTH. MEANWHILE, PEPSI IS CHANGING ITS
ZERO SUGAR RECIPE. IT'S THE NEXT STAGE IN THE
EFFORT TO PERFECT THE RECIPE UNTIL IT ALSO CONTAINS ZERO
PEPSI. PEOPLE WHO'VE TRIED THE NEW
FORMULA CLAIM THAT IT'S VERY DIFFERENT FROM THE ORIGINAL,
BECAUSE IT NO LONGER HAS A "WEIRD AFTER-TASTE."
NOW IT MERELY HAS THE WEIRD "DURING" TASTE.
MEANWHILE, IF NAUGHTY ARCHEOLOGY MAKES YOUR COLUMN DORIC, THEN
YOU'RE IN LUCK, BECAUSE A POMPEII RESIDENCE FILLED WITH
EROTIC FRESCOES HAS REOPENED AFTER 20 YEARS, AND INCLUDES A
FRESCO OF THE FERTILITY GOD PRIAPUS.
SWEET SMOKING VESUVIUS! HE IS LITERALLY WEIGHING HIS
SCHWANZ AGAINST A BAG OF GOLD, IN FRONT OF A BASKET OF FRUIT.
MAN, IN THE OLDEN DAYS, THE FARMER'S MARKET WAS INTENSE.
>> Stephen: I'M CURIOUS, I'M REALLY CURIOUS.
WHAT PART OF THAT CBS IS GOING TO LET SHOW.
THEY MIGHT BLUR THE ENTIRE SCREEN.
MEANWHILE, THERE'S NEWS OUT OF OKLAHOMA, WHERE A LOOSE COW WAS
SPOTTED WANDERING OUTSIDE AN OLIVE GARDEN RESTAURANT.
MAYBE IT WAS LOST... MAYBE IT HAD A CRAVING FOR
BOLOGNESE, JUST LIKE THE KIND GRANDMA USED TO BE.
WOW, DID YOU JUST FIND OUT WHERE MEAT CAME FROM.
I'M SORRY YOU HAD TO LEARN THIS WAY.
YOU KNOW THEIR MOTTO, WHEN YOU ARE HERE, WE EAT YOUR FAMILY.
MEANWHILE, PEOPLE WHO GET UPSET ABOUT THINGS ARE DOING IT AGAIN.
THIS TIME, THEY'RE UP IN ARMS ABOUT SOMETHING CALLED
"FIREBUDS," WHICH IS A DISNEY TV SHOW, AND SOMEHOW, NOT A STRAIN
OF WEED. IT'S A SHOW FOR TODDLERS ABOUT
KIDS AND THEIR TALKING SENTIENT RESCUE VEHICLE FRIENDS.
BUT "FIREBUDS" HAS EARNED THE WRATH OF THE CONSERVATIVE GROUP
"ONE MILLION MOMS," WHO ARE UPSET BECAUSE ONE OF THE MAIN
CHARACTERS IN "FIREBUDS," VIOLET, HAS TWO MOMS.
WHY IS "ONE MILLION MOMS" UPSET ABOUT A CHARACTER HAVING TWO
MOMS? IS THAT NOT ENOUGH?
(AS PROTESTOR) "WE DEMAND DISNEY ADD 999,998
MOMS! AS GOD INTENDED!"
ANOTHER CONSERVATIVE SITE WARNED PARENTS THAT AXL THE AMBULANCE
HAS TWO VEHICULAR FATHERS. WHICH IS OBVIOUSLY UNNATURAL!
A CAR FAMILY IS A MOMMY CAR AND A DADDY CAR, LIKE IN THE KELLY
BLUE BIBLE! IT'S AUDI AND S.U.V., NOT AUDI
AND S.U.-STEVE! MEANWHILE, A NEW TALKING BUTTON
SYSTEM LETS YOU GET A TEXT FROM YOUR DOG.
UH, I'M GOOD. I KNOW MY DOG, BENNY.
AND I HAVE A PRETTY GOOD IDEA HOW THAT'S GOING TO GO.
"HI!" "HI!"
"I MISS YOU!" "I MISS YOU!"
"HI!" "SQUIRREL!"
POOP EMOJI! "HI!"
HERE'S HOW IT WORKS. DOGS LEARN TO STEP ON A VARIETY
OF BUTTONS, EACH ASSOCIATED WITH A COMMAND WORD, AND CAN LEARN UP
TO NINE WORDS WITH THE BUTTONS, AND EVEN CREATE WORD
COMBINATIONS LIKE "WATER" PLUS "BONE" TO INDICATE THEY WANT AN
ICE CUBE. NOT TO BE CONFUSED WITH WHAT
HUMANS MEAN BY "WATER" PLUS "BONE."
MEANWHILE, THERE'S NEWS FROM THE FLORIDA OF SCANDINAVIA, SWEDEN:
AN OUTDATED LAW THAT REQUIRED LEGAL PERMISSION FOR DANCING IN
NIGHTCLUBS AND RESTAURANTS IS NO MORE, BECAUSE THE SWEDISH
GOVERNMENT IS GETTING RID OF PERMITS NEEDED FOR DANCING.
YOU CAN LEARN MORE ABOUT THE FIGHT FOR THE RIGHT TO DANCE IN
THE SWEDISH DOCUMENTARY, "FUÜTLUÜSE."
WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK WITH JESSE EISENBERG.
>> Stephen: WELCOME BACK, EVERYBODY.
CORY WONG ON GUITAR, RIGHT THERE.
NICE TO YOU HAVE THIS WEEK. WELCOME BACK, EVERYBODY.
MY FIRST GUEST IS AN ACTOR YOU KNOW FROM "THE SOCIAL NETWORK,"
"NOW YOU SEE ME," AND "FLEISHMAN IS IN TROUBLE."
PLEASE WELCOME BACK TO "THE LATE SHOW," JESSE EISENBERG!
♪ (APPLAUSE)
>> THANK YOU. >> Stephen: SO NICE TO SEE
YOU. >> NICE TO SEE YOU TOO.
>> Stephen: IT IS REALLY LOVELY TO SEE YOU AGAIN, AS I
WAS SAYING BACKSTAGE T HAS BEEN A MINUTE.
>> YES, SO GREAT TO SEE YOU. >> Jon:
>> Stephen: YOU WERE HERE IN 2015 ON OUR 16th SHOW.
>> YEAH, YEAH. >> Stephen: IT IS 1,348 SHOWS
LATER. >> WOW.
>> Stephen: THAT IS A LOT TO COVER.
>> YEAH. >> Stephen: I DON'T WANT TO
MUCH CA UP ON ALL SEVEN YEARS SO LET'S JUST STICK WITH THE
HOLIDAYS. >> OKAY.
>> Stephen: HOW WERE THOSE, DID YOU HAVE A LOVELY TIME, A
LOVELY RELAXING, REFRESHING, REJUVENATING TIME FOR 2023.
>> I WOULN'T USE ANY OF THOSE ADJECTIVES.
>> Stephen: NOT LOVELY, RELAXING REJUVENATE.
>> NO, I HAD A LOVELY, BIZARRE TIME, WE GO TO A VULCAN DANCE
CAMP. >> Stephen: DANCE CAMP.
>> DO YOU NOT-- . >> Stephen: I I HAVE NOT
DANCED, IS IT IN THE BALANCE CANS OR SOME PLACE DOING BALANCE
CANADIANSS LIKE THE ETHNIC PEOPLE OF THE BALANCE CANS.
>> THAT'S T INSPIRED BY PEOPLE IN THE BALANCE CANS WHO ARE NOT.
THERE THESE ARE PEOPLE LIKE ME, KIND OF LIKE, YOU KNOW, YOU SEE
PEOPLE WHO THIS STYLE OF DANCES. AND ST BEAUTIFUL, WONDERFUL.
BUT I DON'T LIKE IT BECAUSE IT IS DANCING, YOU KNOW.
SO I AVOID IT. >> Stephen: YOU WENT TO A
CAMP, HOW DO YOU AVOID IT IF YOU WENT TO A BULKAN DANCE
CAMP. >> HAVE I BEEN AVOIDING DANCING
MY WHOLE LIFE. I'M THE KIND OF PERSON WHO
SPENDS THE PROM HIDING IN THE BATHROOM IN THE TOILET SEAT
BECAUSE I DON'T LIKE DANCING IN THIS CASE THOUGH I FOUND THIS
LITTLE LOOPHOLE IN DANCE CAMP WHICH IS THAT YOU CAN DO A
JUGGLING CLASS DURING SOME OF THE DANCING.
SO I SIGNED UP FOR-- . >> Stephen: ALSO BALANCE
BALANCE CAN. >> ST TRADITIONAL AMERICAN
JUGGLING, PURE AMERICANA JUGGLING SO I SIGNED UP FOR THE
JUGGLING CLASS. GI TO THE JUGGLING CLASS.
ST THE KID'S JUGGLING CLASSICS I'M THE ONLY-- I'M THE TALLEST
ONE THERE WHICH IS EXCITING AND I'M THE OLDEST.
AND I'M AN ADULT. I AM DOING THIS JUGGLING CLASS.
I'M THERE ONLY BECAUSE I DON'T LIKE DANCING.
AND I DON'T LIKE JUGGLING EITHER.
BUT I DON'T LIKE DANCING MORE THAN I DON'T LIKE JUGGLING, YOU
KNOW, ANYWAY, THE TEACHER WHO IS THE ONLY OTHER ADULT THERE, THEY
HAVE LIKE A FAMILY EMERGENCY, THEY HAD TO LEAVE, THIS
WONDERFUL SWEET WOMAN AND I HAD TO TAKE OVERT JUGGLING CLASS.
>> Stephen: NOT KNOWING ANYTHING ABOUT JUGGLING.
>> OR CHILDREN, YES, OR TEACHING.
YEAH, OR BALANCE CANADIANSING, WHICH EVERYBODY ELSE KNOWS ABOUT
THERE. >> Stephen: YES, THEY WERE AT
THAT CAMP. >> SO I HAD TO TAKE OVER.
I WAS TERRIBLE. THE CLASS TURNED INTO MAYHEM AND
I REALIZED IT IS BECAUSE, THIS IS A FLAW BUT I WANT PEOPLE TO
THINK I'M COOL, YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN.
SO I CAN'T DISCIPLINE YOUNG PEOPLE BECAUSE I WANT THEM TO
LOVE ME. SO THEY WERE LIKE WE'LL THROW
BALLS AT THE WINDOW AND CREATE A BAT WITH THE STICK.
AND I WAS LIKE THAT'S AWESOME. WE SHOULD ALL DO THAT AND
PASSING OUT CIGARETTES AND EVERYTHING.
>> Stephen: WOW, WOW. CAN I GO BACK TO SOMETHING YOU
SAID EARLIER ON IN THE STORY. >> SURE.
>> Stephen: IS THAT YOU IMPLIED THAT YOU AND YOUR WIFE
DIDN'T JUST GO, YOU HAD BEEN MORE THAN ONCE O TO THIS BALANCE
DANCE CAMP. >> YES, IT IS A KIND OF THING
WHERE YOU DON'T LEARN YOUR LESSON AND THEN YOU DO THIS-- .
>> Stephen: I'M GUESSING THIS IS YOUR WIFE'S IDEA.
>> THIS IS MOSTLY HERS. >> Stephen: HAVE YOU BEEN OPEN
WITH HER ABOUT YOUR RELUCTANCE, YOUR LOATHING OF ORGANIZED HUMAN
MOVEMENT. >> NO, BUT SHE IS GOING TO WATCH
THE SHOW TONIGHT AND I THINK STH IS-- .
>> Stephen: RESOLVE THE COMMUNICATION, HEALTHY
RELATIONSHIPS ARE ALL ABOUT COMMUNICATION.
>> YEAH. >> Stephen: GOOD FOR YOU.
>> NANGS A LOT. >> Stephen: PEOPLE HAVE BEEN
WATCHING THE SERIES FLEISHMAN IS IN TROUBLE.
BUT NOW YOU'RE NOT ACTING, ACTUALLY.
>> THAT'S RIGHT. >> Stephen: YOU ARE NOT ACTING
IN THIS NEW FIM, YOU WROTE IT AND ARE DIRECTING IT.
>> THAT'S RIGHT, YEAH. >> Stephen: AND ST YOU WILL
CAD WHEN YOU FINISH SAVING THE WORLD, WHAT IS IT ABOUT.
>> IT IS ABOUT A MOTHER AND A SON, JULIANNE PLAYS THE MOTHER,
SHE RUNS A DOMESTIC VIOLENCE SHELTER IN THE MIDWEST AND HER
SON IS LIKE THIS TIKTOK STYLE STAR ONLINE AND THEY HAVE A
CLASH OF VALUES. SHE HE IS A CAPITALIST TEENAGE
KID TRYING TO MIKE MONEY SELLING MUSIC AND SHE IS A SOCIAL
JUSTICE PERSON. >> Stephen: AND YOU AS A
DIRECTOR, ARE YOU THE KIND OF DIRECTOR, BECAUSE I'M ALWAYS
CURIOUS WHEN ACTORS TAKE THIS TURN.
ARE YOU THE KIND OF A DIRECTOR YOU AS AN ACTOR WANT?
>> NO, NO, NO. I WAS KIND OF LIKE THE PERSON I
WOULD SECRETLY HATE, YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN, AND CALL MY AGENT,
WHY DID YOU PUT ME IN THIS THING.
YOU KNOW, AS AN ACTOR I LOVE LIKE GETTING DIRECTION FROM
PEOPLE, YOU KNOW, AS YOU CAN TELL.
I HAVEN'T FORMED MYSELF YET. AND I LOVE ANY KIND OF
MICROMANAGING OR EVEN MACRO MANAGING.
I LOVE BEING MANAGED. AND AS A DIRECTOR I FOUND MYSELF
JUST COMPLETELY IN A-W-E AND TERRIFIED OF THE ACTOR.
I WAS STANDING THERE WITH JULIANNE MORE, MY JOB TO GIVE
HER NOTES AND I WAS THINKING SHE PROBABLY DON'T WANT TO LEARN THE
STUPID LINES I WROTE LAST YEAR SO MAYBE I SHOULD LEAVE HER
ALONE. AND OF COURSE THAT IS NOT HOW
YOU MAKE A MOVIE OR LEAD A TEAM OR DO ANYTHING IN THIS WORLD.
>> Stephen: I'M SEEING A PATTERN.
>> YES. >> Stephen: BETWEEN THIS AND
THE CHILDREN WHO ARE ALLOWED TO DO ANYTHING THEY WANT WITH THE
BALLS AND THE STICK AND EVERYTHING.
I FEEL LIKE PERHAPS YOU SHOULDN'T BE LEFT IN CHARGE OF
THINGS, OR RATHER MAYBE YOU SHOULD, I HEAR THE MOVIE IS
LOVELY SO MAYBE THIS NONCONFRONTATIONAL STYLE IS
USEFUL T WORKS FOR YOU. >> IT WOULD HAVE BEEN LOVELY
HER-- . >> Stephen: IF YOU HAD DONE
ANYTHING. WE HAVE A CLIP, CAN YOU TELL ME
WHAT IS HAPPENING? >> YEAH, THE BOY IS JUST TRYING
TO GET HIS PARENTS TO LISTEN TO HIS MUSIC AND THEY DON'T WANT
TO. >> Stephen: JIM.
>> YOU DON'T PLAY BLUES MUSIC, DO YOU.
>> NO, I PLAY FOLK ROCK WITH ALTERNATIVE INFLUENCES.
>> I DON'T KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS. >> WELL, CAN I PLAY IT FOR YOU.
I JUST GAVE YOU THE NEW SONG, TRUTH ACHE, I CAN SHOW IT TO
YOU. >> DID YOU SAY TRUTH EGGS.
>> YEAH, DO YOU WANT TO HEAR IT? >> I'M ASSUMING THAT WE ARE NOT
YOUR TARGET AUDIENCE. >> RIGHT.
>> I MEAN IT'S GEARED TOWARDS TEENAGER, AM I RIGHT?
>> YEAH, SURE. >> BECAUSE IT IS INCREDIBLY
UNETHICAL. WHITE PEOPLE PLAYING BLUES
MUSIC. DID YOU EVER MEET THE-- BECAUSE
IS HE VERY EXPLICIT ON THE ISSUE OF CULTURAL APPROPRIATION.
>> DAD, I DON'T PLAY BLUSH MUSIC.
>> Stephen: DON'T GO AWAY, JESSE ISENBERG IS GOING TO SING
THE AN DORAN NATIONAL ANTHEM WHEN WE COME BACK.
>> Stephen: HEY, EVERYBODY, LOOK AT THAT, RIGHT THERE, NOTED
BULKAN DANCER. JESSE EISENBERG IS HERE.
HE IS PERFORMING THROUGHOUT THE FILM AND DO I UNDERSTAND YOU
WROTE SOME OR ALL OF THE MUSIC THAT HE PERFORMS?
I KNOW YOU LIKE-- . >> Stephen: LET'S KEEP THIS
ABOUT YOU. >> OKAY, COOL, I DON'T KNOW
ANYBODY WHO LIKES MUSICAL THEATER BUT LIKE I DO.
AND LIKE NO, MY SECRET DESIRE IS TO WRITE MUSICAL THEATER.
YEAH, YEAH, HAVE I WRITTEN MUSICALS, NONE OF THEM HAVE BEEN
PRODUCED. AND SO I FELT LIKE OKAY I'M
MAKING THIS MOVIE, I COULD WRITE THE SONGS, THE CHARACTER SAY
ROCK STAR, I COULD WRITE ANYTHING I WANT.
AND I GAVE MY VERSIONS OF THE SONGS WITH INSTRUMENTATION.
I DID IT ON GARAGE BAND, YOU KNOW, YOU CAN'T-- LIKE THE
BEATLES. ANYWAY, SO I GAVE IT TO THE
PRODUCERS AND THEY SAID YEAH, WE HEARD THE SONGS, WHY DON'T YOU
JUST MEET A FEW COMPOSERS SO I MET THIS INCREDIBLE COMPOSER,
WHO WAS JUST NOMINATED FOR HIS WORK.
AND AND I PROUDLY SENT HIM MY SONGS AND HE TOLD ME IT SOUNDED
KIND OF LIKE, YOU KNOW, LIKE A KID WHO REALLY LIKES LESS
MISERABLE, MAYBE TOOK ONE CLASS OF MUSICAL THEATER AT THE LOCAL
HIGH SCHOOL. SO HE REDID ALL THE MUSIC.
EXCEPT THERE ARE A FEW SONGS IN THE MOVIE THAT ARE NOT GOOD
SONGS THAT YOU ARE KIND OF LAUGHING AT, THOSE ARE MINE.
>> Stephen: THERE IS A SONGS IN HERE, A POEM.
>> YEAH. >> Stephen: THERE IS A POEM IN
THIS MOVE WREE I UNDERSTAND ABOUT THE MARSHALL ISLANDS.
>> THAT'S RIGHT. >> Stephen: WHICH IS NOT A
COMMON SUBJECT FOR POETRY. >> YEAH.
>> Stephen: AND THIS IS YOURS BASED ON A PROJECT THAT YOU
MR. DOING, WHAT IS THIS PROJECT. >> YEAH, NO, I WROTE SONGS LIKE
ABOUT ALL THE COUNTRIES. CUZ MY WIFE IS LIKE THIS VERY
CULTURED, TRAVELED WOMAN. AND-- .
>> Stephen: BALKAN DANCING. >> SHE DOESN'T DO REGULAR
DANCING T HAS TO BE BALKAN. AND I'M NOT THOSE THINGS.
AND SO I, LIKE TO TRY TO IMPRESS HER AND IT DIDN'T, I GOT ALL THE
NATIONAL ANTHEMS FROM ALL AROUND THE WORLD.
AND I STARTED WRITING LYRICS TO THE NATIONAL ANTHEMS TO TRY TO
KIND OF REMEMBER THINGS ABOUT THE COUNTRY, AND TO IMPRESS HER.
AND I COULD TELL FROM YOUR FACE ARE YOU ALSO NOT FEELING LOVE
FOR ME. YOU ALSO DON'T WANT TO MARRY ME.
>> Stephen: IT IS THE SAME LEVEL OF LOVE I HAD BEFORE THE
INTERVIEW START. I DON'T, DON'T THEY ALREADY HAVE
LYRICS, MOST OF THEM. >> YES, THEY DO, IN OTHER
LANGUAGES. SO I STRIPPED THEM OF THEIR
LYRICS, AND I WROTE MY OWN LYRICS.
>> Stephen: GIVE ME AN EXAMPLE OF LIKE, DID YOU DO ALL THE
COUNTRIES OR. >> NO, NO, I GOT UP TO BERUNDI
AND STOPPED BECAUSE IT'S REALLY HARD.
>> Stephen: GIVE ME AN A. >> OKAY, I I DID A SONG FOR
ANDORRA. >> Stephen: IF YOU DON'T MIND,
WOULD YOU LIKE TO HEAR THE SONG FOR ANDORRA?
>> REALLY? (APPLAUSE)
>> OKAY. NOW LUCKILY IT IS A SMALL
COUNTRY SO I AM ONLY OFFENDING A SMALL GROUP OF PEOPLE.
SO I CAN SING THE AN DORI NATIONAL ANTHEM WITH MY LYRICS.
>> Stephen: PLEASE. >> THIS IS THE AN DORAN
NATIONAL-- I'M SO SORRY, THE AN DORAN NATIONAL ANTHEM, IT'S A
TINY LITTLE LAND. ♪ THERE'S ONLY 64,000 PEOPLE
THERE. ♪ A POPULATION I CAN COUNT ON
ONE HAND. ♪ SO IT SURPRISING THAT THERE
ARE SNOALT SO MANY INSTRUMENTS REQUIRED FOR THIS SONG.
♪ WHERE DO THEY FIND THE MUSICIANS.
♪ OUT OF ONLY 64,000. ♪ NOT A REAL COMPETITIVE JOB.
♪ TO PLAY THE NATIONAL ANTHEM. ♪ FOR ANDORRA.
(APPLAUSE) SRS THANK YOU FOR YOUR SERVICE.
>> THANK YOU SO MUCH. >> Stephen: THANK YOU SO
MUCH LOVELY TO YOU HAVE. >> THANKS A LOT.
>> Stephen: WHEN YOU FINISH SAVING THE WORLD IS IN THEATERS
FRIDAY, JESSE EISENBERG, EVERYBODY.
WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK WITH COMEDIAN ATSUKO-- ATSUKO
OKATSUKA.
HEY, EVERYBODY. WELCOME BACK.
MY NEXT GUEST IS A STAND-UP COMEDIAN WHO HAS AN HBO SPECIAL
OUT NOW CALLED "THE INTRUDER." MY FAMILY RAISED ME ON MIND
TRICKS, THESE MIND TRICKS AND IF YOU ARE AN IMMIGRANT OR CHILD OF
IMMIGRANT YOU MIGHT BE ABLE TO RELATE, YEAH, BECAUSE WE LOVE
OUR FAMILIES, THEY ARE JUST SO SEEMINGLY GENEROUS.
THERE WAS EAT, PLEASE, EAT, PLEASE.
DID YOU EAT, NO. EAT, PLEASE, EAT, EAT, EAT, EAT.
EAT. DID YOU EAT?
NO, I DIDN'T THINK SO. EAT, PLEASE, EAT, DID YOU EAT,
NO, PLEASE, EAT, EAT, NO, PLEASE, DID YOU EAT, NO, PLEASE,
EAT, EAT, EAT, DID YOU EAT, I DON'T THINK.
SO I COOK, NOW, EAT, EAT, EAT. AND THE NEXT TIME THEY SEE YOU
THEY CALL YOU FAT. PLEASE WELCOME TO "THE LATE
SHOW," ATSUKO OKATSUKA. >> THANK YOU, THANK YOU.
>> Stephen: HELLO. >> HI.
>> Stephen: NICE TO MEET YOU, THANKS FOR COMING ON.
>> THANKS FOR HAVING ME, STAND HONOR.
>> Stephen: THAT'S LOVELY FOR YOU TO SAY.
>> YEAH. >> Stephen: IT IS A PLEASURE
TO YOU HAVE HERE. >> THANK YOU.
>> Stephen: NOW YOU THE INTRUDER IS ON ALL KINDS OF BEST
COMEDY SPECIALS IN 2022, THAT MUST BE VERY SATISFYING.
>> THANK YOU. >> Stephen: YEAH, WE GOT "THE
NEW YORK TIMES" SAID IT, VARIETY SAID IT, HOW HAVE YOU BEEN
PROCESSING THE SUCCESS? >> YEAH, IT'S SO WILD, IT'S SO
COOL. SOMETHING THAT STARTED SO HERE
IN MY HEAD, YOU KNOW N MY BRAIN, COULD BE SO RELATABLE TO THE
WHOLE WORLD, YOU KNOW. YOU CAN ONLY HOPE AND IT'S
REALLY COOL THAT PEOPLE IN QATAR ARE WATCHING IT.
KAZAKHSTAN, I SWEAR, HEY, I'M FROM QATAR, I'M WATCHING YOU YOU
AND IT IS SO WILD. I DIDN'T KNOW HBO HIT SO MANY
PLACES. BUT CANADA.
NO, IT'S NOT PLAYING THERE. >> Stephen: IT'S NOT
AVAILABLE. >> NO,.
>> Stephen: NOT AVAILABLE IN CANADA.
WOW, THAT REPRESSIVE TRUDEAU REGIME.
>> IT'S SO WILD. INDIA IS PLAYING BUT CANADA IS
LIKE WE CAN'T, AND IT'S RIGHT THERE, YOU KNOW.
IT'S LIKE RIGHT THERE. >> Stephen: WALK UP TO THE
BORDER, THROW IT ACROSS LAKE ERIE.
>> YEAH. >> Stephen: HOW DO YOU PREPARE
FOR DOING A SPECIAL. >> YEAH, WELL, YOU KNOW,
REPUTATION-- REPETITION. I ALSO TRAVELED A LOT, YOU KNOW,
TO PRACTICE FOR IT I WENT TO EDINBORO.
I RAN IT 26 TIME TESS FRINGEE FESTIVAL THERE, I PERFORMED FOR
PEOPLE I NEVER, YOU KNOW, EVEN HEARD OF.
SCOTTISH FARMERS, THAT WILL MAKE YOU REALLY STRONG, YOU KNOW.
THEY JUST KIND OF LOOK AT LIKE I THOUGHT THIS WAS GOING TO BE A
TRAGIC PLAY. THE WHOLE TIME, YOU KNOW.
AND THEN FOR FRENCH CANADIANS I DID PERFORM IN MONTREAL.
AND THAT WAS INTERESTING BECAUSE THEY KIND OF REALTIME TRANSLATE
WHAT YOU ARE SAYING. BECAUSE FRENCH IS THEIR FIRST
LANGUAGE, SO IT IS KIND OF LIKE PERFORMING ON ZOOM, YOU KNOW.
THERE IS-- . >> Stephen: A LITTLE DELAY.
>> A LITTLE DELAY, A LITTLE LAG WHERE YOU DO THE PUNCH LINE AND
THEY'RE LIKE-- YEAH T WAS REALLY CUTE, YEAH.
SO THAT IS KIND OF HOW, JUST DOING IT ALL OVER THE WORLD TO
SEE. IT IS IMPORTANT TO SEE IF YOUR
COMEDY STANDS RELATABLE WORLDWIDE, YEAH.
>> Stephen: IT IS DIRECTEDDED BY OUR FRIEND SIGNIFICANT
NATARO. >> YEAH.
>> Stephen: HOW DID Y'ALL MEET?
>> WE MET THROUGH THIS NETFLIX STAND UP COMPETITION SHOW THAT
NEVER AIRED. BUT I WAS ONE OF THE
CONTESTANTS, 30 COMEDIANS, SIGNIFICANT, KNEEL AND COLE, AND
IT IS LIKE THE VOICE FOR STAND UP COMEDY.
>> Stephen: WHY DIDN'T IT EVER AIR.
>> THIS THING HIT THE ENTIRE-- ENTIRE WORLD.
>> Stephen: THIS IS BEFORE THE PANDEMIC.
>> THE PANDEMIC, YEAH, SHUT IT DOWN.
>> Stephen: WOW. >> YEAH, BUT WE GOT TO MEET AND
WE BECAME FRIENDS THROUGH IT AND SHE IS SO BUSY, YOU KNOW, SHE
PLAYS PICKLEBALL. >> Stephen: SURE, AN ACTION
MOVIE STAR. >> ACTION MOVIE STAR.
STILL DOING STAND UP, YOU KNOW. >> Stephen: THE TWO KIDS.
>> YES, AND YOU KNOW, SHE EVEN SAID IN INTERVIEWS I DON'T WANT
TO DIRECT ANY MORE AND BUT I STILL ACT.
AND SHE SAID YES, THAT IS HOW THAT CAME TO.
>> Stephen: YOU ARE THE SECOND ASIAN WOMAN TO HAVE A HBO COMEDY
SHOW AFTER MARGARET CHO. AND I UNDERSTAND SHE HAD AN
INFLUENCE ON YOU. HOW DID YOU FIRST LEARN ABOUT
MARRING RET. >> SO WE WERE IN CHURCH-- .
>> Stephen: YOU AND MARGARET WERE IN CHURCH.
>> KIND OF, HER DVD WAS AT CHURCH.
IT WAS DURING A SERMON AND ONE OF MY CHURCH MATES, CHURCHEES.
>> Stephen: CHURCH GOERS. >> PLIE FELLOW CHURCH GO GOERS
WHISPERED AT ME, HEY, AND PASSED ME THE DVD LIKE IT WAS SOME
CONTRA BAND. AND I TOOK IT HOME.
I HAD NEVER SEEN STAND UP COMEDY BEFORE.
>> Stephen: OF ANY KIND. >> OF ANY KIND.
I WAS PRETTY NEW TO THE STAGE AND IT WAS SO COOL SEEING
SOMEONE THAT LOOKS LIKE ME DOING, JUST STANDING THERE FOR
AN HOUR. I DIDN'T KNOW THIS WAS A JOB,
THAT YOU COULD JUST TALK FUNNY FOR AN HOUR.
AND SO THAT REALLY WAS LIKE, IT HIT ME HARD AND IT ALSO, I THINK
YOU KNOW, IT STARTED MAKING ME THINK THIS IS HOW MY PASTOR
IS-- YOU KNOW, KIND OF A DRY SPEAKER.
AND IT REALLY LIKE PUT THE-- STANDARDS WERE HIGH AFTER
WATCHING SOMEONE TALK FUNNY FOR AN HOUR.
>> Stephen: YEAH. I HAVE SOME BIBLE FRIENDLY
JOKES. >> Stephen: DO YOU MIND
SHARING ONE. >> SURE, YEAH SO MY
BROTHER-IN-LAW JUST BOUGHT A GENESIS, A CAR, PRETTY PRICEY,
YOU KNOW. OF THOSE, I WOULD HAVE TO GET ME
A JOB. THAT'S PRETTY GOOD.
>> Stephen: GOD BLESS YOU. >> STUFF LIKE THAT THAT I FEEL
LIKE MY PASTOR COULD HAVE BEEN DOING, BUT NO, JUST OPEN UP PAGE
FIVE, YOU KNOW, LIKE THAT. >> Stephen: NOW IN SOCIAL
MEDIA, YOU HAVE CREATED A PHENOMENON WITH SOMETHING YOU
CALL THE DROP CHALLENGE WITH YOUR GRANDMA.
>> YEAH. >> Stephen: CAN YOU EXPLAIN,
BEFORE YOU SHOW IT CAN I SHOW ME THE ORIGIN OF THE DROP
CHALLENGE. >> YEAH, YOU KNOW, THE SONG
PARTITION BY BEYONCE AND THERE IS A BEAUTIFUL BEAT DROP THAT
HAPPENS OVER AND OVER. THAT SONG JUST ALWAYS STUCK WITH
ME THROUGHOUT THE YEARS. AND I SAID GOD, WOULDN'T IT BE
FUNNY IF LIKE EVERY TIME THE BEAT DROPS YOUR BODY DOES TOO.
AND SO I JUST STARTED DOING IT AROUND LITTLE TOKYO OF LOS
ANGELES WITH MY GRANDMA AND POSTED IT AND EVERYONE IN THE
WORLD WAS LIKE WE WANT TO DO IT TOO.
AND THAT IS ALSO HOW HOW IT GOT TO MAITIONS IN LIKE QATAR.
>> Stephen: LIKE A BILLION PEOPLE WATCH IT.
>> YEAH, TERRY CRUISE HAS DONE T SERENA WILLIAMS HAS DONE IT AND
I LEARNED SO MANY DIFFERENT OCCUPATIONS DO IT TOO BECAUSE I
LIVE UNDER A ROCK S WHAT I SOUND LIKE.
BUT YOU KNOW, PEOPLE WERE DOING IT AT THEIR JOBS.
SO NURSES WERE DOING IT. ROCK SPLITTERS, THAT IS THEIR
JOB. >> Stephen: ROCK SPLITTERS.
>> YES, THERE SAY MAN WHO SPLITS ROCKS FOR A LIVING SO EVERY TIME
HE WOULD SPLIT IT HE WOULD DROP AND HIT THE ROCK.
>> Stephen: LET'S SHOW THE FOLKS WHAT WE ARE TALKING ABOUT.
>> GIVE ME DROP. ♪
>> Stephen: I SAW IT, THAT IS
FANTASTIC. I HAVE TO TELL YOU, SNS ISN'T
THAT BEAT JUST TOUCH YOU. >> Stephen: IT DOES.
BUT WHEN I HEARD WERE YOU DOING THIS WITH YOUR GRANDMA, I
THOUGHT YOUR GRANDMA WAS GOING TO DO IT TOO, THAT WOULD BE
THE-- WELL, THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR BEING HERE.
>> THANK YOU FOR HAVING ME, THANK YOU SO MUCH.
IT WAS GREAT. "THE INTRUDER" IS STREAMING NOW
ON HBO MAX. ATSUKO OKATSUKA, EVERYBODY.
WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK. (APPLAUSE)
HEY, EVERYBODY. THAT'S IT FOR "THE LATE SHOW."
TUNE IN TOMORROW WHEN MY GUESTS WILL BE TREVOR NOAH AND
STEPHANIE SHOE. STICK AROUND FOR JAMES CORDEN.
GOOD NIGHT.