1 00:00:01,835 --> 00:00:03,870 FLORIDA GOVERNOR RON DeSANTIS SAYS STATE 2 00:00:03,870 --> 00:00:06,072 LAWMAKERS WILL REASSERT CONTROL OVER DISNEY WORLD'S SPECIAL 3 00:00:06,072 --> 00:00:09,242 SELF-GOVERNING DISTRICT. DeSANTIS AND DISNEY HAVE BEEN 4 00:00:09,242 --> 00:00:11,845 LOCKED IN AN ONGOING BATTLE AFTER THE COMPANY PUBLICLY 5 00:00:11,845 --> 00:00:14,714 OPPOSED THE STATE'S SO-CALLED "DON'T SAY GAY" MEASURE 6 00:00:14,714 --> 00:00:16,983 LAST YEAR. DeSANTIS THREATENED TO 7 00:00:16,983 --> 00:00:19,786 BUILD A COMPETING THEME PARK OR EVEN A STATE PRISON NEXT TO 8 00:00:19,786 --> 00:00:20,987 DISNEY. DeSANTIS IS THREATENING TO 9 00:00:20,987 --> 00:00:26,292 BUILD A PRISON NEXT TO DISNEY. 10 00:00:26,292 --> 00:01:00,093 ♪ ♪ 11 00:01:00,093 --> 00:01:04,097 Announcer: IT'S "THE LAE SHOW 12 00:01:04,097 --> 00:01:08,334 WITH STEPHEN COLBERT." TONIGHT... 13 00:01:08,334 --> 00:01:12,605 OWING 787. FIRST, STEPHEN WELCOMES 14 00:01:12,605 --> 00:01:19,779 ELIZABETH OLSEN AND JENA FRIEDMAN. 15 00:01:19,779 --> 00:01:24,651 FEATURING LOUIS CATO AND "THE LATE SHOW" BAND. 16 00:01:24,651 --> 00:01:28,955 AND NOW, LIVE ON TAPE FROM THE ED SULLIVAN THEATER 17 00:01:28,955 --> 00:01:48,741 IN NEW YORK CITY, IT'S STEPHEN COLBERT! 18 00:01:48,741 --> 00:01:53,346 Stephen: NICE TO SEE YOU. 19 00:01:53,346 --> 00:01:57,851 ARE WE GETTING THE TROMBONE TONIGHT? 20 00:01:57,851 --> 00:02:00,453 HAPPY WEDNESDAY. HAPPY WEDNESDAY. 21 00:02:00,453 --> 00:02:04,457 HAPPY, HAPPY, HAPPY, HAPPY. HELLO! 22 00:02:04,457 --> 00:02:07,460 HELLO. HELLO. 23 00:02:07,460 --> 00:02:14,734 HELLO, MY FRIENDS. [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] 24 00:02:14,734 --> 00:02:20,840 STEPHEN! STEPHEN! 25 00:02:20,840 --> 00:02:22,442 Stephen: PLEASE HAVE A SEAT, EVERYBODY. 26 00:02:22,442 --> 00:02:24,978 THANK YOU VERY MUCH. WELCOME. 27 00:02:24,978 --> 00:02:28,181 WELCOME MORNING ALL TO "THE LATE SHOW." 28 00:02:28,181 --> 00:02:31,918 I'M YOUR HOST, STEPHEN COLBERT. IT'S A BEAUTIFUL SPRING DAY 29 00:02:31,918 --> 00:02:33,620 HERE IN NEW YORK. BIRDS ARE TAKING TO THE SKY, 30 00:02:33,620 --> 00:02:46,199 BUNNIES ARE TAKING TO THE FIELD, FOX GOT TAKEN TO THE CLEANERS. 31 00:02:46,199 --> 00:02:47,433 [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] 'CAUSE YESTERDAY, FOX NEWS 32 00:02:47,433 --> 00:02:49,335 SETTLED DOMINION'S DEFAMATION LAWSUIT FOR 33 00:02:49,335 --> 00:02:57,310 $787.5 MILLION. THIS IS A HUGE HIT 34 00:02:57,310 --> 00:03:00,046 TO FOX'S BOTTOM LINE, ALTHOUGH IT'S NOT CLEAR IF 35 00:03:00,046 --> 00:03:03,182 INSURANCE WILL COVER SOME OF FOX'S LIABILITY. 36 00:03:03,182 --> 00:03:06,286 OF COURSE, FOX HAS TO HAVE LIABILITY INSURANCE 37 00:03:06,286 --> 00:03:16,462 TO INSURE THEIR ABILITY TO LIE. ALTHOUGH, ALTHOUGH... 38 00:03:16,462 --> 00:03:17,297 [APPLAUSE] I DON'T KNOW WHO WOULD 39 00:03:17,297 --> 00:03:20,833 INSURE THEM. MAYBE FRAUDERS. 40 00:03:20,833 --> 00:03:23,002 "WE ARE FRAUDERS, INSURING FOX WAS DUMB, DUMB, 41 00:03:23,002 --> 00:03:26,806 DUMB!" THIS MASSIVE SETTLEMENT 42 00:03:26,806 --> 00:03:31,311 WAS THE NUMBER ONE STORY ON EVERY SINGLE CABLE NEWS 43 00:03:31,311 --> 00:03:37,417 NETWORK EXCEPT ONE. TAKE A GUESS. 44 00:03:37,417 --> 00:03:39,519 IN FACT, WHEN THE SETTLEMENT WAS REACHED, FOX NEWS COULDN'T 45 00:03:39,519 --> 00:03:42,322 EVEN BRING THEMSELVES TO TELL THEIR VIEWERS HOW MUCH THEY 46 00:03:42,322 --> 00:03:46,192 FORKED OVER TO DOMINION. THE CLOSEST THEY CAME WAS 47 00:03:46,192 --> 00:03:49,929 A STATEMENT FROM FOX NEWS HOST AND TAXIDERMIED CORPSE OF 48 00:03:49,929 --> 00:03:52,465 HOWIE KURTZ, HOWIE KURTZ. 49 00:03:52,465 --> 00:03:55,702 HOWARD, TELL THEM HOW MUCH DOMINION WON. 50 00:03:55,702 --> 00:03:57,470 A DOMINION LAWYER GAVE REPORTERS A DOLLAR FIGURE 51 00:03:57,470 --> 00:03:59,205 FOR THE SETTLEMENT, BUT I HAVE NOT BEEN ABLE TO 52 00:03:59,205 --> 00:04:04,644 INDEPENDENTLY CONFIRM THAT. Stephen: TWO HOURS AFTER THE 53 00:04:04,644 --> 00:04:06,346 SETTLEMENT WAS ANNOUNCED HE CAN'T CONFIRM 54 00:04:06,346 --> 00:04:09,382 HOW MUCH FOX NEWS PAID? IF ONLY THIS FOX NEWS ANCHOR 55 00:04:09,382 --> 00:04:16,055 HAD SOME SOURCE AT FOX NEWS! THIS MIGHT NOT EVEN BE THE END 56 00:04:16,055 --> 00:04:19,926 OF THE CASH PARTY FOR DOMINION. THEY'RE ALSO SUING CONSERVATIVE 57 00:04:19,926 --> 00:04:24,330 NETWORKS OANN AND NEWSMAX, CONSPIRACY LAWYER SIDNEY POWELL, 58 00:04:24,330 --> 00:04:30,970 AND MY PILLOW CEO MIKE LINDELL, FOR $1.3 BILLION. 59 00:04:30,970 --> 00:04:32,138 [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] I DON'T THINK LINDELL HAS THAT 60 00:04:32,138 --> 00:04:34,941 KIND OF CASH ON HAND. HE'S GONNA TO HAVE TO CHANGE HIS 61 00:04:34,941 --> 00:04:40,813 NAME AND FLEE TO MEXICO TO START "MI PILLOW." 62 00:04:40,813 --> 00:04:44,150 "HOLA, MY NAME IS MIGUEL PILLOW, THIS IS MY BRIDE, 63 00:04:44,150 --> 00:04:50,790 MARIA MEMORY FOAM." BURRITO, TACO, 64 00:04:50,790 --> 00:04:54,027 EXTRA GUAC. ♪ ♪ 65 00:04:54,027 --> 00:05:02,001 DOMINION ALSO HAS A DEFAMATION CASE AGAINST RUDY GIULIANI, 66 00:05:02,001 --> 00:05:07,206 ALSO FOR $1.3 BILLION. [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] 67 00:05:07,206 --> 00:05:10,343 THAT'S A LOT, MAN. THEY'RE SUING RUDY FOR 68 00:05:10,343 --> 00:05:12,345 EVERYTHING HE'S GOT! WHICH AT THIS POINT, IS A STOLEN 69 00:05:12,345 --> 00:05:15,381 CVS SHOPPING CART FULL OF EMPTY MERLOT BOTTLES AND A JAR 70 00:05:15,381 --> 00:05:20,019 FULL OF SPARE TEETH. FOX NEWS ISN'T EVEN OFF THE HOOK 71 00:05:20,019 --> 00:05:22,488 YET, EITHER. THEY'RE ALSO BEING SUED FOR 72 00:05:22,488 --> 00:05:25,525 ALL THEIR ELECTION LIES FOR $2.7 BILLION, BY A VOTING 73 00:05:25,525 --> 00:05:29,896 MACHINE COMPANY CALLED SMARTMATIC. 74 00:05:29,896 --> 00:05:33,266 AND WE ALREADY KNOW FOX IS AFRAID OF THIS ONE. 75 00:05:33,266 --> 00:05:36,869 FOR PROOF, LOOK AT FORMER FOX HOST AND WAX SCULPTURE OF 76 00:05:36,869 --> 00:05:40,907 WILLIAM SHATNER LEFT NEXT TO AN OPEN FLAME, LOU DOBBS. 77 00:05:40,907 --> 00:05:44,444 LOU DOBBS IS NAMED AS A DEFENDANT IN THIS ONE 78 00:05:44,444 --> 00:05:48,314 AND JUST ONE DAY AFTER THE SMARTMATIC SUIT WAS FILED, 79 00:05:48,314 --> 00:05:51,684 FOX BUSINESS CANCELED LOU DOBBS'S SHOW. 80 00:05:51,684 --> 00:05:53,119 IT WAS A BIG DISAPPOINTMENT FOR HIS AUDIENCE: 81 00:05:53,119 --> 00:05:57,090 A CAGE FULL OF PARAKEETS IN THE DAY ROOM. 82 00:05:57,090 --> 00:05:59,892 BUT FOX IS TRYING TO MAKE SOME MONEY BACK, BECAUSE THEY'RE ALSO 83 00:05:59,892 --> 00:06:03,830 A PLAINTIFF IN AN ELECTION LAWSUIT ON BEHALF OF FOX CEO 84 00:06:03,830 --> 00:06:08,101 LACHLAN MURDOCH, SEEN HERE ASKING RUPERT "WHAT HAPPENED 85 00:06:08,101 --> 00:06:13,606 TO MY NEW STEPMOMMY?" LACHLAN IS SUING AN AUSTRALIAN 86 00:06:13,606 --> 00:06:15,875 WEBSITE FOR IMPLYING HE WAS A CONSPIRATOR IN THE JANUARY 87 00:06:15,875 --> 00:06:19,312 6TH INSURRECTION. THE ACTUAL NAME OF THAT 88 00:06:19,312 --> 00:06:23,282 WEBSITE: CRIKEY NEWS! 89 00:06:23,282 --> 00:06:26,719 NOW, AND IF THEY LOSE, IT'LL BE GOOD FOR ITS MAIN COMPETITOR 90 00:06:26,719 --> 00:06:42,702 DIDGERI-NEWS. "TONIGHT'S TOP STORY: 91 00:06:42,702 --> 00:06:43,703 [DIDGERIDOO MUSIC] ALL THAT, AND DEADLY SPIDERS 92 00:06:43,703 --> 00:06:52,078 IN YOUR SHOWER." SO... 93 00:06:52,078 --> 00:06:55,448 WE DON'T BROADCAST THERE, DO WE? 94 00:06:55,448 --> 00:06:59,418 FOX NEWS IS OUT A WHOLE LOT OF MONEY, BUT THEY'RE NOT 95 00:06:59,418 --> 00:07:02,355 TELLING THEIR VIEWERS THAT. AND THEY DON'T HAVE TO, 96 00:07:02,355 --> 00:07:05,224 BECAUSE THIS SETTLEMENT DOES NOT FORCE THEM TO OWN UP TO THE 97 00:07:05,224 --> 00:07:06,759 DAMAGE THEY DID TO OUR COUNTRY OR APOLOGIZE ON THEIR NETWORK. 98 00:07:06,759 --> 00:07:09,562 SO... [BOOING] 99 00:07:09,562 --> 00:07:14,367 Stephen: WE FEEL THE SAME WAY. 100 00:07:14,367 --> 00:07:17,570 SO WE'VE DECIDED TO MAKE THEM APOLOGIZE ON OUR NETWORK. 101 00:07:17,570 --> 00:07:24,043 [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] JIM? 102 00:07:24,043 --> 00:07:25,344 BEFORE WE GO TONIGHT, WE WANT TO SAY-- 103 00:07:25,344 --> 00:07:26,646 WE'RE SORRY-- TO DOMINION-- 104 00:07:26,646 --> 00:07:29,682 AND TO THE AMERICAN PEOPLE. WE HERE AT FOX NEWS-- 105 00:07:29,682 --> 00:07:32,685 LIED TO YOU ABOUT-- THE 2020 ELECTION-- 106 00:07:32,685 --> 00:07:34,320 REPEATEDLY AND CONSISTENTLY. WE ADMT THAT WE ARE 107 00:07:34,320 --> 00:07:36,489 GUILTY-- OF AMPLIFYING THOSE VOICES. 108 00:07:36,489 --> 00:07:40,092 INSANE PEOPLE LIKE THIS GUY. HELLO, I'M MIKE LINDELL. 109 00:07:40,092 --> 00:07:42,261 A GUY LIKE THIS IS GIVEN A PLATFORM-- 110 00:07:42,261 --> 00:07:43,462 BECAUSE WE WANT TO MAKE SURE-- 111 00:07:43,462 --> 00:07:44,730 WHEN YOU'RE WATCHING FOX NEWS-- 112 00:07:44,730 --> 00:07:47,533 IT WILL MAKE YOU DUMBER. MY ORIGINAL MY SLIPPERS 113 00:07:47,533 --> 00:07:48,734 ARE BACK IN STOCK. PLEASE-- 114 00:07:48,734 --> 00:07:50,336 TAKE US OFF-- TELEVISION BEFORE WE-- 115 00:07:50,336 --> 00:07:53,139 ALLOW THESE CROOKS-- TO TURN OUR COUNTRY INTO-- 116 00:07:53,139 --> 00:08:01,747 DUMPS, BIG MASSIVE DUMPS! [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] 117 00:08:01,747 --> 00:08:11,324 Stephen: WELL... WE'VE DONE OUR PART NOW. 118 00:08:11,324 --> 00:08:14,894 WHILE FOX NEWS IS COUGHING UP CASH FOR SPREADING LIES, 119 00:08:14,894 --> 00:08:17,396 THE GUY THEY WERE LYING FOR IS BUSY SCAMMING CASH 120 00:08:17,396 --> 00:08:18,831 OUT OF THE PEOPLE THEY WERE LYING TO. 121 00:08:18,831 --> 00:08:21,400 'CAUSE YESTERDAY, HE MADE THIS ANNOUNCEMENT. 122 00:08:21,400 --> 00:08:24,737 HELLO AGAIN. THIS IS YOUR FAVORITE PRESIDENT 123 00:08:24,737 --> 00:08:27,306 DONALD TRUMP WITH SOME NEWS YOU ARE GOING TO REALLY LOVE. 124 00:08:27,306 --> 00:08:30,209 A FEW MONTHS AGO WE ALMOST BROKE THE INTERNET WHEN I 125 00:08:30,209 --> 00:08:32,745 ANNOUNCED MY TRUMP DIGITAL TRADING CARDS. 126 00:08:32,745 --> 00:08:35,181 WELL, I'VE GOT SOME FANTASTIC NEWS FOR YOU. 127 00:08:35,181 --> 00:08:39,518 MY TRUMP DIGITAL TRADING CARDS ARE BACK WITH A BANG. 128 00:08:39,518 --> 00:08:40,987 Stephen: HIS DIGITAL TRADING CARDS 129 00:08:40,987 --> 00:08:46,859 ARE BACK WITH A BANG? 130 00:08:46,859 --> 00:08:50,930 LESS NATURAL THAN THE MASHUP WE JUST DID. 131 00:08:50,930 --> 00:08:55,334 THESE CARDS ARE NFTs, WHICH DIGITAL FINANCE EXPERTS DEFINE 132 00:08:55,334 --> 00:08:58,004 AS "A SCAM WE ALL STOPPED FALLING FOR 8 MONTHS AGO." 133 00:08:58,004 --> 00:09:02,341 AND THE FIRST BATCH FEATURED THE EX-PRESIDENT AS 134 00:09:02,341 --> 00:09:04,810 WEARING RACE CAR PAJAMAS, AS A BAD BOY ASTRONAUT 135 00:09:04,810 --> 00:09:10,249 WITH ROBO-BELT AND MAKING STOCKS GO UP WITH THE INSPIRING HAT 136 00:09:10,249 --> 00:09:13,352 MESSAGE. DOW. 137 00:09:13,352 --> 00:09:15,922 THE NEW BATCH OF CARDS HAS SOME REAL AVANT GARDE WORK. 138 00:09:15,922 --> 00:09:18,991 LIKE HIM STEALING THE LIBERTY BELL, AND THIS ONE 139 00:09:18,991 --> 00:09:24,063 WHERE HE'S WITH A LION THAT IS ON FIRE THAT IS PAWING 140 00:09:24,063 --> 00:09:27,233 AT THE EARTH, WHICH IS ALSO FLOATING IN THE CLOUDY SKY OF 141 00:09:27,233 --> 00:09:33,406 EARTH, IN FRONT OF THE BEAUTIFUL CONSTELLATION OF "45 RUUUU!" 142 00:09:33,406 --> 00:09:35,775 THAT ONE, OF COURSE, BROUGHT TO YOU BY KYLE WHO TOOK SOME 143 00:09:35,775 --> 00:09:37,143 MUSHROOMS AND STARTED PLAYIN' AROUND WITH HIS 144 00:09:37,143 --> 00:09:42,515 A.I. ARTBOT. KYLE! 145 00:09:42,515 --> 00:09:48,788 MUSHROOMS, I DON'T KNOW. BUT THAT'S NOT ALL! 146 00:09:48,788 --> 00:09:50,389 HERE HE IS REENACTING THAT FAMOUS MOMENT WHEN WASHINGTON 147 00:09:50,389 --> 00:09:56,195 LOOKED INTO THE DRESSING ROOMS OF THE MISS TEEN USA PAGEANT. 148 00:09:56,195 --> 00:09:58,164 EACH OF THESE BEAUTIFUL, COLLECTIBLE EMBARRASSMENTS 149 00:09:58,164 --> 00:10:04,136 COULD BE YOURS FOR ONLY $99. IF THEY WEREN'T ALREADY 150 00:10:04,136 --> 00:10:07,506 SOLD OUT. HONESTLY, I'M HAPPY FOR ALL 151 00:10:07,506 --> 00:10:10,509 THOSE MAGA SENIORS WHO WERE ABLE TO PURCHASE THESE AFTER GETTING 152 00:10:10,509 --> 00:10:14,780 THEIR GRANDKIDS ON THE PHONE TO HELP THEM "DO A COMPUTER." 153 00:10:14,780 --> 00:10:17,683 AS FOR MY FAVORITE, I CAN'T DECIDE BETWEEN SCREAMING 154 00:10:17,683 --> 00:10:21,387 WHILE PLAYING GUITAR AND SCREAMING WHILE PLAYING 155 00:10:21,387 --> 00:10:22,822 GUITAR ON A HARLEY. IT'S GONNA BE HARD TO TOP THAT 156 00:10:22,822 --> 00:10:27,026 ON THE NEXT BATCH. I'M THINKIN' PLAYING GUITAR 157 00:10:27,026 --> 00:10:31,097 ON A MOTORCYCLE, ON A BOAT, HANGIN' FROM A HELICOPTER, 158 00:10:31,097 --> 00:10:36,802 PILOTED BY A LAVA GORILLA IN SPACE! 159 00:10:36,802 --> 00:10:43,509 $98. BACK DOWN ON EARTH, THERE'S SOME 160 00:10:43,509 --> 00:10:45,845 NEWS FROM IOWA. AND IT'S NOT GOOD. 161 00:10:45,845 --> 00:10:48,280 YESTERDAY, THEIR STATE SENATE PASSED A BILL LOOSENING 162 00:10:48,280 --> 00:10:52,485 CHILD LABOR LAWS. YEAH, KIDS HAVE HAD IT EASY 163 00:10:52,485 --> 00:10:55,321 FOR TOO LONG. THEY'RE SO SPOILED THESE DAYS 164 00:10:55,321 --> 00:10:58,324 WITH THEIR iPHONES AND THEIR PS5s AND ALL TEN OF THEIR 165 00:10:58,324 --> 00:10:59,992 FINGERS. IF YOU HADN'T HEARD ABOUT THIS 166 00:10:59,992 --> 00:11:07,400 BILL, IT'S BECAUSE IT WAS PASSED TUESDAY MORNING AT 4:52 A.M. 167 00:11:07,400 --> 00:11:08,734 NEVER A GREAT SIGN. THE ONLY THINGS ANYONE 168 00:11:08,734 --> 00:11:12,938 SHOULD BE DOING AT 4:52 A.M. IS PARTYING BECAUSE YOU'RE 169 00:11:12,938 --> 00:11:18,978 YOUNG OR PEEING BECAUSE YOU'RE NOT. 170 00:11:18,978 --> 00:11:22,014 [APPLAUSE] SURE. 171 00:11:22,014 --> 00:11:26,218 SWOLLEN PROSTATE! NOW, IF PASSED BY THE HOUSE, 172 00:11:26,218 --> 00:11:27,686 THIS BILL WILL ALLOW 14-YEAR-OLDS TO WORK SIX-HOUR 173 00:11:27,686 --> 00:11:31,724 NIGHT SHIFTS. THAT'S GONNA LEAD TO SOME BRAND 174 00:11:31,724 --> 00:11:34,794 NEW HOMEWORK EXCUSES. "I'M SORRY, MRS. LARSEN. 175 00:11:34,794 --> 00:11:36,662 MY DIORAMA OF TREASURE ISLAND GOT CAUGHT IN THE HOG 176 00:11:36,662 --> 00:11:41,400 MANGLER." THIS BILL ALSO ALLOWS 177 00:11:41,400 --> 00:11:43,702 15-YEAR-OLDS TO WORK ON ASSEMBLY LINES MOVING ITEMS UP 178 00:11:43,702 --> 00:11:46,806 TO 50 POUNDS. AND OLDER TEENS GET THE JOBS 179 00:11:46,806 --> 00:11:50,076 THAT ARE EVEN MORE FUN. BECAUSE THIS BILL ALLOWS 180 00:11:50,076 --> 00:11:53,479 16- AND 17-YEAR-OLDS TO SERVE ALCOHOL. 181 00:11:53,479 --> 00:11:55,815 COME ON. HOW ARE YOU SUPPOSED TO POUR 182 00:11:55,815 --> 00:11:59,819 YOUR HEART OUT TO A 16-YEAR-OLD BARTENDER? 183 00:11:59,819 --> 00:12:01,420 "HAD A FIGHT WITH THE MISSUS? I HEAR YA. 184 00:12:01,420 --> 00:12:04,290 I HAD A BIG ARGUMENT WITH TYLER TODAY OVER WHO 185 00:12:04,290 --> 00:12:06,859 WOULD WIN, AN ORC THIEF OR A HALF-ELF MAGIC USER. 186 00:12:06,859 --> 00:12:08,661 ANYWAY, CAN I HAVE YOUR COCKTAIL UMBRELLA? 187 00:12:08,661 --> 00:12:13,432 I NEED TO REDO MY DIORAMA OF TREASURE ISLAND." 188 00:12:13,432 --> 00:12:21,006 GOT CAUGHT IN THE HOG MANGLER. TODAY'S SPECIAL IS MANGLED HOG. 189 00:12:21,006 --> 00:12:22,808 IN ACROSS THE POND NEWS, WE'RE JUST A FEW WEEKS AWAY 190 00:12:22,808 --> 00:12:26,645 FROM THE CORONATION OF KING CHARLES, SEEN HERE LEARNING 191 00:12:26,645 --> 00:12:29,415 THE INGREDIENTS OF BLOOD PUDDING. 192 00:12:29,415 --> 00:12:32,118 "CHARLES WILL OFFICIALLY BE CROWNED KING ON MAY 6TH" 193 00:12:32,118 --> 00:12:35,721 IS A SENTENCE I AM SOMEHOW STILL SAYING IN 2023. 194 00:12:35,721 --> 00:12:38,824 AND WE'RE STARTING TO GET DETAILS ABOUT THE CELEBRATION. 195 00:12:38,824 --> 00:12:41,861 BUCKINGHAM PALACE RECENTLY ANNOUNCED THE OFFICIAL 196 00:12:41,861 --> 00:12:44,930 RECIPE OF THE WEEKEND IS CORONATION QUICHE, 197 00:12:44,930 --> 00:12:48,134 ALONG WITH COOKING INSTRUCTIONS. I'M TOLD WE HAVE A COPY OF 198 00:12:48,134 --> 00:12:50,536 CHARLES' QUICHE RECIPE. STEP ONE: TELL YOUR 199 00:12:50,536 --> 00:12:55,040 VALET YOU WANT QUICHE. STEP TWO: QUICHE APPEARS. 200 00:12:55,040 --> 00:12:58,711 NOT ALL OF THE PREPARATIONS ARE GOING AS SMOOTHLY. 201 00:12:58,711 --> 00:13:01,013 THE PALACE HAS REPORTEDLY HAD A VERY HARD TIME FINDING 202 00:13:01,013 --> 00:13:02,715 ANY MUSICIANS TO PERFORM. THEY'VE BEEN TURNED DOWN BY 203 00:13:02,715 --> 00:13:06,952 HARRY STYLES, ELTON JOHN, THE SPICE GIRLS, ADELE, 204 00:13:06,952 --> 00:13:10,489 AND ED SHEERAN. YOUR HIGHNESS, HEAR ME OUT, 205 00:13:10,489 --> 00:13:16,829 JUST HIRE A D.J. MY COUSIN RICKY HAS AN iPOD, 206 00:13:16,829 --> 00:13:20,232 AND A CONNECTION TO SOME MOLLY. IF THERE'S A BLUETOOTH 207 00:13:20,232 --> 00:13:21,867 HOOKUP AT WESTMINSTER, YOU AND CAMILLA ARE GONNA BE 208 00:13:21,867 --> 00:13:24,436 DOING THE CHICKEN DANCE IN THE AISLES. 209 00:13:24,436 --> 00:13:27,139 BUT THEY HAVE FINALLY FOUND SOMEONE TO SING FOR OL' KING 210 00:13:27,139 --> 00:13:30,009 CHUCKY BECAUSE WE NOW KNOW THAT KATY PERRY AND LIONEL 211 00:13:30,009 --> 00:13:32,645 RICHIE WILL PERFORM AT KING CHARLES'S CORONATION 212 00:13:32,645 --> 00:13:37,216 CONCERT. AH, YES, THOSE FAMOUS ICONS OF 213 00:13:37,216 --> 00:13:41,620 BRITISH MUSIC, KATY PERRY AND LIONEL RICHIE. 214 00:13:41,620 --> 00:13:45,491 YOU KNOW THEIR SONGS "'ELLO" AND "I SNOGGED A LASS, 215 00:13:45,491 --> 00:13:48,093 AND IT WAS ALL RIGHT, INNIT?" WE'VE GOT A GREAT SHOW 216 00:13:48,093 --> 00:13:52,364 FOR YOU TONIGHT. MY GUESTS ARE ELIZABETH OLSEN 217 00:13:52,364 --> 00:13:56,502 AND COMEDIAN JENA FRIEDMAN. BUT WHEN WE COME BACK, 218 00:13:56,502 --> 00:14:00,439 THE LATEST TECH TRENDS. YOU KNOW, I LOVE TECH. 219 00:14:25,097 --> 00:14:41,046 ♪ ♪ 220 00:14:41,046 --> 00:14:41,847 [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] Stephen: WELCOME BACK, 221 00:14:41,847 --> 00:14:43,582 EVERYBODY. GIVE IT UP FOR THE BAND. 222 00:14:43,582 --> 00:14:46,051 LOUIS CATO AND "THE LATE SHOW," OUR FRIENDS, BEAUTIFUL YOUNG 223 00:14:46,051 --> 00:14:50,222 FRIENDS OVER THERE. LOUIS, TONIGHT WE HAVE TWO 224 00:14:50,222 --> 00:14:53,158 FANTASTIC PERFORMERS, ELIZABETH OLSEN WILL BE OUT HERE LITTLE 225 00:14:53,158 --> 00:14:55,027 WHILE. YOU MIGHT KNOW HER FROM THE 226 00:14:55,027 --> 00:14:59,865 STUFF SHE DOES. ALSO COMEDIAN JANA FRIEDMAN IS 227 00:14:59,865 --> 00:15:01,867 GOING TO BE OUT HERE IN A LITTLE WHILE. 228 00:15:01,867 --> 00:15:04,370 BIG FAN. ALSO I JUST WANT TO REMIND 229 00:15:04,370 --> 00:15:06,872 EVERYBODY OUT THERE WATCHING, IF YOU ENJOY "THE LATE SHOW" AND 230 00:15:06,872 --> 00:15:08,140 YOU WANT TO SEE MORE OF "THE LATE SHOW," YOU SHOULD 231 00:15:08,140 --> 00:15:12,811 CHECK OUT THE "THE LATE SHOW" POD SHOW. 232 00:15:12,811 --> 00:15:17,216 YOU CAN GO WITH THE PODCAST, THAT THINGAMAJIG. 233 00:15:17,216 --> 00:15:21,587 EXTENDED INTERVIEWS, JOKES THAT WE COLLECT AND UPON THE PODCAST. 234 00:15:21,587 --> 00:15:24,023 WE CUT THEM FOR TIME, NOT BECAUSE THEIR QUALITY. 235 00:15:24,023 --> 00:15:28,761 ALL THE JOKES OR QUALITY. WE HAVE EXTENDED INTERVIEWS WITH 236 00:15:28,761 --> 00:15:32,831 NICOLAS CAGE, BRIAN COX, LIN-MANUEL MIRANDA AND JOHN 237 00:15:32,831 --> 00:15:36,168 KANDER AND THEN NASA ARTEMIS 2 ASTRONAUTS. 238 00:15:36,168 --> 00:15:37,569 MANY MORE. WHO KNOWS. 239 00:15:37,569 --> 00:15:40,205 MAYBE THERE WILL BE EXTENDED INTERVIEWS WITH ELIZABETH OLSON 240 00:15:40,205 --> 00:15:44,310 AND JENNA FRIEDMAN. I'M UP FOR IT. 241 00:15:44,310 --> 00:15:48,414 FOLKS, I LOVE KEEPING UP WITH ALL THE LATEST 242 00:15:48,414 --> 00:15:50,482 TECH TRENDS, UNLESS THAT INVOLVES UPDATING 243 00:15:50,482 --> 00:15:54,620 MY SOFTWARE IN WHICH CASE I WILL BE CLICKING "REMIND ME LATER" 244 00:15:54,620 --> 00:15:56,955 UNTIL THE SUN ENGULFS THE EARTH. 245 00:15:56,955 --> 00:16:00,492 BUT IT TURNS OUT TODAY'S HOTTEST TECHNOLOGY IS ACTUALLY 246 00:16:00,492 --> 00:16:02,528 FROM THE PAST. BECAUSE, ACCORDING 247 00:16:02,528 --> 00:16:03,896 TO MULTIPLE REPORTS, GEN Z IS LOVING VINTAGE 248 00:16:03,896 --> 00:16:05,197 TECHNOLOGY AND THEIR LATEST VINTAGE OBSESSION 249 00:16:05,197 --> 00:16:12,237 IS THE FLIP PHONE. THAT'S RIGHT, THE FLIP PHONE. 250 00:16:12,237 --> 00:16:14,406 THE NUMBER ONE WAY FOR KIDS TO LEARN THAT SNAKES DIE 251 00:16:14,406 --> 00:16:18,510 BY BUMPING INTO THEMSELVES. NOW FLIP PHONES DON'T HAVE 252 00:16:18,510 --> 00:16:20,012 A CAMERA. SO HOW DO THESE RETRO-OBSESSED 253 00:16:20,012 --> 00:16:23,882 YOUNG PEOPLE TAKE PICTURES? WELL, DON'T YOU WORRY, BECAUSE 254 00:16:23,882 --> 00:16:28,620 THE OTHER HOTTEST GEN Z GADGET IS A 20-YEAR-OLD DIGITAL CAMERA. 255 00:16:28,620 --> 00:16:33,659 KIDS, WE STOPPED USING THESE 'CAUSE THEY SUCKED! 256 00:16:33,659 --> 00:16:35,661 THAT'S LIKE SAYING "SURE, THERE'S ANESTHESIA, BUT HAVE YOU 257 00:16:35,661 --> 00:16:39,698 EVER TRIED BITING ON A STICK?" BUT APPARENTLY, THE FLAWS 258 00:16:39,698 --> 00:16:42,601 ARE THE DRAW. BECAUSE, WHILE THE IMAGE QUALITY 259 00:16:42,601 --> 00:16:45,137 IS POORER, GEN Z-ERS FIND THE VINTAGE LOOK MORE MEANINGFUL 260 00:16:45,137 --> 00:16:48,273 AND MORE CHALLENGING. YES, FROM EXPERIENCE, I CAN SAY 261 00:16:48,273 --> 00:16:55,647 THAT LOOKING AT OLD PHOTOS IS DEFINITELY "CHALLENGING." 262 00:16:55,647 --> 00:17:00,419 [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] 263 00:17:00,419 --> 00:17:03,956 IT'S GOING TO GET BETTER. IT DOESN'T END THERE. 264 00:17:03,956 --> 00:17:05,290 OVER THE LAST COUPLE YEARS, GEN Z-ERS HAVE BEEN DITCHING 265 00:17:05,290 --> 00:17:09,862 E-BOOKS FOR REAL BOOKS, AND DITCHING AIRPODS IN FAVOR OF 266 00:17:09,862 --> 00:17:11,597 WIRED HEADPHONES. PERFECT FOR ANYONE WHO LOVES 267 00:17:11,597 --> 00:17:14,967 LISTENING TO MUSIC BUT WISHES THEY COULD GET CAUGHT ON 268 00:17:14,967 --> 00:17:18,637 EVERY ITEM IN A TWO-FOOT RADIUS. THERE'S EVEN BEEN INCREASED 269 00:17:18,637 --> 00:17:20,806 INTEREST IN EXTREMELY OLD METHODS OF COMMUNICATION, 270 00:17:20,806 --> 00:17:25,144 LIKE HAM RADIO AND MORSE CODE. BUT ALL THIS VINTAGE TECHNOLOGY 271 00:17:25,144 --> 00:17:28,647 IS STILL TECHNOLOGY. SO WHAT IF YOU'RE 272 00:17:28,647 --> 00:17:30,649 A YOUNG PERSON WHO WANTS TO FULLY UNPLUG, BUT STILL NEEDS 273 00:17:30,649 --> 00:17:32,484 TO COMMUNICATE? DON'T WORRY, 274 00:17:32,484 --> 00:17:37,289 "THE LATE SHOW" HAS JUST THE PRODUCT FOR YOU. 275 00:17:37,289 --> 00:17:42,394 JIM? SICK OF SOCIAL MEDIA, IT IS 276 00:17:42,394 --> 00:17:45,931 TIME TO GO TRULY RETRO WITH 18TH CENTURY FLAG BASED 277 00:17:45,931 --> 00:17:48,667 COMMUNICATION. INTRODUCING NOKIA SEMAPHORE, THE 278 00:17:48,667 --> 00:17:53,038 ONLY SYSTEM DESIGNED TO CUT OUT THE NOISE AND LET YOU TALK WITH 279 00:17:53,038 --> 00:17:55,541 YOUR ANDS LIKE AN OLD TIMEY SAILOR 280 00:17:55,541 --> 00:18:00,879 LEARN THE SIMPLE CODE AND YOU BE 281 00:18:00,879 --> 00:18:22,668 CHATTING IN NO TIME. ♪ ♪ 282 00:18:22,668 --> 00:18:25,437 C? THAT ONLY TOOK 10 MINUTES. 283 00:18:25,437 --> 00:18:37,749 NOKIA SEMAPHORE IS PERFECT FOR GROUP CHATS. 284 00:18:37,749 --> 00:18:46,024 AND NOW YOU CAN SEXT LIKE NEVER 285 00:18:46,024 --> 00:18:59,404 BEFORE. GIVEN UP SOCIAL MEDIA? 286 00:18:59,404 --> 00:19:03,141 YOU CAN STILL YELL HOT TAKES AT STRANGERS. 287 00:19:03,141 --> 00:19:06,311 UNLIKE YOUR PHONE, FEEL FREE TO USE IT AT THE THEATER. 288 00:19:06,311 --> 00:19:08,914 BEST OF ALL, SAY GOODBYE TO DRUNKENLY CONTACTING YOUR EX. 289 00:19:08,914 --> 00:19:13,986 I'M GOING TO FLAG BRIAN. OH, NO, HE'S BAD FOR YOU. 290 00:19:13,986 --> 00:19:22,995 GIVE ME MY FREAKING FLAG. CALL 911! 291 00:19:22,995 --> 00:19:31,937 NO, USE THE FLAGS 292 00:19:31,937 --> 00:19:39,077 [SCREAMING] NOKIA SEMAPHORE. 293 00:19:39,077 --> 00:19:42,014 EVERYTHING OLD IS COOL AGAIN. Stephen: WE'LL BE RIGHT 294 00:19:42,014 --> 00:19:45,484 BACK WITH ELIZABETH OLSON. 295 00:19:56,962 --> 00:20:08,373 [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] 296 00:20:08,373 --> 00:20:10,042 Stephen: HEY, EVERYBODY. WELCOME BACK TO THE 297 00:20:10,042 --> 00:20:12,978 "THE LATE SHOW." MY FIRST GUEST IS AN ACTOR 298 00:20:12,978 --> 00:20:14,179 YOU KNOW FROM "MARTHA MARCY MAY MARLENE," 299 00:20:14,179 --> 00:20:18,684 "INGRID GOES WEST," AND "WANDAVISION." 300 00:20:18,684 --> 00:20:26,792 SHE NOW STARS IN "LOVE AND DEATH." 301 00:20:26,792 --> 00:20:29,494 I'VE BEEN THINKING ABOUT YOU A LOT AND IT'S REALLY BEEN 302 00:20:29,494 --> 00:20:32,531 BOTHERING ME. I'M NOT SURE WHETHER I WANT YOU 303 00:20:32,531 --> 00:20:48,747 TO DO ANYTHING ABOUT IT OR NOT. I'M VERY ATTRACTED TO YOU I'M 304 00:20:48,747 --> 00:20:52,084 JUST TIRED OF THINKING ABOUT IT SO I'M GOING TO TELL YOU THAT. 305 00:20:52,084 --> 00:20:55,988 OH. Stephen: PLEASE WELCOME BACK 306 00:20:55,988 --> 00:21:01,093 TO "THE LATE SHOW," ELIZABETH OLSEN. 307 00:21:01,093 --> 00:21:11,536 ♪ ♪ 308 00:21:11,536 --> 00:21:20,012 [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] Elizabeth: HI. 309 00:21:20,012 --> 00:21:25,417 IT'S SO BEAUTIFUL HERE. Stephen: IT'S REALLY LOVELY 310 00:21:25,417 --> 00:21:28,053 TO HAVE YOU BACK. I DON'T KNOW WHETHER I WAXED 311 00:21:28,053 --> 00:21:31,590 ELOQUENTLY ENOUGH THE LAST TIME YOU WERE HERE ABOUT WHAT A FAN I 312 00:21:31,590 --> 00:21:33,692 AM OF YOUR TALENT AND PERFORMANCES. 313 00:21:33,692 --> 00:21:36,528 ALSO THE LAST TIME YOU WERE HERE, WE HADN'T SEEN "ONE 314 00:21:36,528 --> 00:21:39,798 DIVISION" YET. WHAT AN EXTRAORDINARY SHOW THAT 315 00:21:39,798 --> 00:21:42,467 WAS. YOU'VE DONE A LOT OF MARVEL 316 00:21:42,467 --> 00:21:45,737 STUFF AND THERE'S BEEN A LOT OF THESE MARBLE SHOWS BUT THAT 317 00:21:45,737 --> 00:21:48,607 REALLY BROKE FORM AN INTERESTING WAY AND IT HAS SUCH A BEAUTIFUL 318 00:21:48,607 --> 00:21:53,345 AND SATISFYING AND HEARTBROKEN EMOTIONAL JOURNEY FOR YOUR 319 00:21:53,345 --> 00:21:57,983 CHARACTER INFORMATION. DID YOU KNOW THAT YOU WERE PART 320 00:21:57,983 --> 00:22:01,953 OF SOMETHING SORT OF GENRE BREAKING? 321 00:22:01,953 --> 00:22:07,492 Elizabeth: WE JUST FELT LIKE PAUL KEPT CALLING US THE 322 00:22:07,492 --> 00:22:09,728 FORGOTTEN COUSIN TO THE MARVEL UNIVERSE. 323 00:22:09,728 --> 00:22:14,099 HE JUST FELT LIKE WERE SOME ANNOYING COUSIN THAT PEOPLE 324 00:22:14,099 --> 00:22:17,869 THROUGH THE CORNER AND I THINK ANTHONY MACKIE AND SEBASTIAN 325 00:22:17,869 --> 00:22:21,506 WERE TRAVELING ALL OVER THE WORLD AND BLOWING THINGS UP. 326 00:22:21,506 --> 00:22:26,211 PAUL AND I WOULD JUST LIKE, DOING SITCOM ACTING IN A CORNER. 327 00:22:26,211 --> 00:22:30,749 OUR AMAZING CAST AND CREW. WE LOVE WHAT WE WERE DOING, WE 328 00:22:30,749 --> 00:22:35,721 HAD SO MUCH FUN DOING IT. BUT WE REALLY FELT LIKE IT WAS 329 00:22:35,721 --> 00:22:39,691 EITHER GOING TO-- IT MIGHT POTENTIALLY RUIN US 330 00:22:39,691 --> 00:22:40,859 ALL. [LAUGHS] 331 00:22:40,859 --> 00:22:43,462 I THINK THAT'S THE STUFF THAT FEELS THE MOST FUN TO ME. 332 00:22:43,462 --> 00:22:47,499 IT'S WHEN YOU FEEL LIKE YOU COULD FAIL AT ANY SECOND. 333 00:22:47,499 --> 00:22:50,569 Stephen: WELL, THE SUPERPOWER OF THAT SHOW TO ME 334 00:22:50,569 --> 00:22:57,242 WAS YOUR ABILITY TO APPROACH GRIEF IN A WAY THAT WAS 335 00:22:57,242 --> 00:22:59,144 BEAUTIFUL AND HEROIC IN SOME WAYS. 336 00:22:59,144 --> 00:23:04,483 Elizabeth: THE WRITING WAS REALLY BEAUTIFUL AND I THINK IT 337 00:23:04,483 --> 00:23:09,121 TOUCHED ON THE WAY WE GRIEVE, TOUCHED ON SO MANY LEVELS BEYOND 338 00:23:09,121 --> 00:23:13,291 JUST BEING AN EMOTIONAL JOURNEY. THEN IT BECAME THIS HUGE SET 339 00:23:13,291 --> 00:23:15,460 PIECE. IT WAS LITERALLY PART OF THE 340 00:23:15,460 --> 00:23:17,662 FABRIC OF ALL OF OUR SET. IT WAS WRITTEN REALLY 341 00:23:17,662 --> 00:23:20,565 BEAUTIFULLY AND DIRECTED BEAUTIFULLY. 342 00:23:20,565 --> 00:23:23,301 tephen: THE LAST TIME YOU WERE HERE, YOU HAD JUST DONE 343 00:23:23,301 --> 00:23:33,979 SOME OF YOUR FIRST REAL AVENGERS STUMPEDS AND HE SAID WOUND OF 344 00:23:33,979 --> 00:23:37,716 THES, YOU HAD TO DO TOO MANY TAKES BECAUSE THEY WOULD HOIST 345 00:23:37,716 --> 00:23:40,018 YOU UP ON THE WIRE. Elizabeth: YOUR STOMACH 346 00:23:40,018 --> 00:23:43,822 LEAVES YOU. IT IS LIKE THE JOY PEOPLE GET ON 347 00:23:43,822 --> 00:23:47,125 ROLLER COASTERS WHICH I DON'T GET THAT PEOPLE OF THAT FEELING. 348 00:23:47,125 --> 00:23:50,295 Stephen: HAVE YOU RECOVERED, YOU HAVE DONE THREE 349 00:23:50,295 --> 00:23:53,665 MARVEL MOVIES SINCE THEN. Elizabeth: I HAVE DONE SO 350 00:23:53,665 --> 00:23:55,333 MANY MARVEL MOVIES. Stephen: WE KNOW OF THREE 351 00:23:55,333 --> 00:23:59,437 THAT YOU'VE DONE. HAVE YOU GOTTEN BETTER AT IT? 352 00:23:59,437 --> 00:24:03,275 BETTER AT THE WIRE WORK? HAVE YOU RECOVERED FROM YOUR 353 00:24:03,275 --> 00:24:05,811 GIDDINESS? Elizabeth: DEFINITELY 354 00:24:05,811 --> 00:24:08,547 RECOVERED FROM MY GETTING THIS. HOW MANY MORE OF THESE DO YOU 355 00:24:08,547 --> 00:24:10,649 WANT? I COULD DO THIS ALL DAY. 356 00:24:10,649 --> 00:24:14,619 SOMETIMES I GET A LITTLE FREAKED OUT. 357 00:24:14,619 --> 00:24:18,056 THERE WAS ONE IN "DOCTOR STRANGE" WHERE I HAD TO 358 00:24:18,056 --> 00:24:23,662 BE DROPPED FROM 30 FEET UP IN LAND AND THEY WANTED TO DROP ME 359 00:24:23,662 --> 00:24:28,533 PRETTY QUICKLY SO THAT IT LOOKED LIKE IT HAD AN IMPACT BUT I KEPT 360 00:24:28,533 --> 00:24:33,138 LANDING LIKE PETER PAN, LIKE FENCING. 361 00:24:33,138 --> 00:24:38,109 JUST USE THE DOUBLE. THIS IS SO RIDICULOUS. 362 00:24:38,109 --> 00:24:43,081 THERE IS A DOUBLE FOR REASON. THEY DO IT ALL THE TIME. 363 00:24:43,081 --> 00:24:46,051 AND THEY USED IT. IN THE MOVIE. 364 00:24:46,051 --> 00:24:48,353 Stephen: THEY USED YOU? Elizabeth: I AM LANDING AND 365 00:24:48,353 --> 00:24:51,089 I LOOK LIKE PETER PAN. I LOOK LIKE I'M FENCING. 366 00:24:51,089 --> 00:24:55,193 IT'S RIDICULOUS. WE HAD SO MUCH TECHNOLOGY, GROW 367 00:24:55,193 --> 00:24:59,664 THROUGH THESE MOVIES AND THEY JUST CHOSE TO REALLY USE ME FOR 368 00:24:59,664 --> 00:25:05,136 EVERY STUNT IN THAT MOVIE. I DIDN'T DO ALL OF THEM BUT I 369 00:25:05,136 --> 00:25:08,106 DID MOST OF THEM WHICH IS A WASTE OF EVERYONE'S TIME BECAUSE 370 00:25:08,106 --> 00:25:10,775 A STUNT DOUBLE DOES IT SO MUCH BETTER. 371 00:25:10,775 --> 00:25:15,480 DO YOU REMEMBER THE ENDING OF "WITCHES OF EASTWICK" WITH 372 00:25:15,480 --> 00:25:17,782 JACK NICHOLSON COVERED IN FEATHERS. 373 00:25:17,782 --> 00:25:20,719 I WAS WAITING FOR THAT MOMENT. I WAS WET, COVERED IN OIL, 374 00:25:20,719 --> 00:25:26,391 COVERED IN BLOOD. AT WHAT POINT ARE THEY GOING TO 375 00:25:26,391 --> 00:25:29,194 BLOW FEATHERS ON ME? THIS IS GETTING RIDICULOUS. 376 00:25:29,194 --> 00:25:31,162 Stephen: IS IT CHALLENGING TO HAVE THOSE EMOTIONAL MOMENTS 377 00:25:31,162 --> 00:25:36,201 WHEN THE PERSON THAT YOU'RE TALKING TO IS A FACE COVERED 378 00:25:36,201 --> 00:25:39,938 WITH LITTLE WHITE DOTS? SO THAT CGI CAN TRACK THEM. 379 00:25:39,938 --> 00:25:42,774 Stephen: OR PURPLE, OR COVERED IN GLITTER. 380 00:25:42,774 --> 00:25:48,613 PURPLE UNCOVERED IN GLITTER. Elizabeth: WHY GLITTER? 381 00:25:48,613 --> 00:25:50,749 VISION DOESN'T GLITTER. Elizabeth: HE DOES. 382 00:25:50,749 --> 00:25:53,151 HIS LAST AIRBRUSHED LAYER IS GLITTER. 383 00:25:53,151 --> 00:25:57,188 GLITTER. Stephen: IS JUST FOR PAUL. 384 00:25:57,188 --> 00:26:01,559 WE HAVE TO TAKE A QUICK BREAK. WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK WITH MORE 385 00:26:01,559 --> 00:26:04,629 ELIZABETH OLSON, EVERYBODY. STICK AROUND. 386 00:26:12,604 --> 00:26:17,375 ♪ ♪ Stephen: WE ARE BACK WITH 387 00:26:17,375 --> 00:26:19,945 THE STAR OF "LOVE AND DEATH," ELIZABETH OLSON. 388 00:26:19,945 --> 00:26:23,214 YOU COME FROM AN ACTING FAMILY KNEW BEEN PERFORMING SINCE YOU 389 00:26:23,214 --> 00:26:24,749 WERE FOUR. Elizabeth: I HAVE BEEN 390 00:26:24,749 --> 00:26:30,088 DOING CAMPS AND SHOWING UP AT THINGS BECAUSE IT WAS AFTER 391 00:26:30,088 --> 00:26:33,158 SCHOOL CARE BUT I WASN'T IN A PROFESSIONAL-- 392 00:26:33,158 --> 00:26:35,126 Stephen: IN OTHER WORDS PERIODS GO BE IN EXTRA IN YOUR 393 00:26:35,126 --> 00:26:40,865 SISTER'S FILM. WE DO OUR RESEARCH. 394 00:26:40,865 --> 00:26:47,005 WAS THERE ANY OTHER OPTION? I'M GOING TO DO THIS. 395 00:26:47,005 --> 00:26:49,841 NO, I'LL BE AN ACTRESS. WAS THERE SOME OTHER PATH FOR 396 00:26:49,841 --> 00:26:52,310 YOU? Elizabeth: I FELT LIKE I 397 00:26:52,310 --> 00:26:54,346 KNEW WHAT I WANTED SINCE I WAS VERY LITTLE. 398 00:26:54,346 --> 00:26:58,416 MY EARLIEST MEMORIES ARE MIMICKING MUSICALS AND I 399 00:26:58,416 --> 00:27:03,955 WATCHED, DANCING, SINGING, ALSO WHAT MY GROUP OF FRIENDS DID SO 400 00:27:03,955 --> 00:27:07,325 WHEN I WENT THROUGH MY ADOLESCENCE, WHEN YOU TRY TO 401 00:27:07,325 --> 00:27:10,462 REBEL AND STAND OUT AND BE DIFFERENT WAS WHEN I THOUGHT I 402 00:27:10,462 --> 00:27:15,133 REALLY THINK I SHOULD BE AN ACCOUNTANT. 403 00:27:15,133 --> 00:27:19,738 THAT WOULD MAKE ME NOT BASIC. Stephen: BEING BASIC WAS-- 404 00:27:19,738 --> 00:27:22,607 Elizabeth: I'M FROM L.A. EVERYONE COMES HERE TO BE AN 405 00:27:22,607 --> 00:27:25,777 ACTOR. I CAN'T JUST BECOME AN ACTOR. 406 00:27:25,777 --> 00:27:28,346 Stephen: ONE ABOUT ACTUARY TABLES? 407 00:27:28,346 --> 00:27:31,249 THAT IS SEXY. Elizabeth: I SHOULD BE AN 408 00:27:31,249 --> 00:27:34,085 INVESTMENT BANKER. I THOUGHT I NEEDED TO DO 409 00:27:34,085 --> 00:27:37,589 SOMETHING DIFFERENT THEN I GOT OVER THAT WHEN I WAS 15 AND FELL 410 00:27:37,589 --> 00:27:39,891 BACK IN THE THEATER. Stephen: IS AN EVER 411 00:27:39,891 --> 00:27:41,760 TEMPTING TO GO TO SOMETHING ELSE NOW? 412 00:27:41,760 --> 00:27:44,496 Elizabeth: NOW IT IS. I THINK ABOUT IT ALL THE TIME. 413 00:27:44,496 --> 00:27:47,365 Stephen: WHEN YOU'RE UP ON THE WIRE 30 FEET FROM THE 414 00:27:47,365 --> 00:27:50,035 GROUND. WHAT DO YOU DAYDREAM ABOUT 415 00:27:50,035 --> 00:27:54,172 DOING? Elizabeth: I LOVE, LOVE, 416 00:27:54,172 --> 00:27:56,908 LOVE GETTING TO DO THIS JOB, ESPECIALLY WHEN YOU FEEL LIKE 417 00:27:56,908 --> 00:28:00,311 YOU'RE WITH PEOPLE WHO CARE A LOT ABOUT IT. 418 00:28:00,311 --> 00:28:03,948 BUT I DO THINK IT WOULD BE FUN TO DO SOMETHING WHERE THERE'S A 419 00:28:03,948 --> 00:28:05,984 BEGINNING AND ENDING THAT YOU ARE IN CONTROL OF. 420 00:28:05,984 --> 00:28:09,788 Stephen: BECAUSE YOU ARE JUST DOING YOUR PART OF IT IN 421 00:28:09,788 --> 00:28:11,956 SOMEONE ELSE'S EDITING IT AND SPECIAL EFFECTS. 422 00:28:11,956 --> 00:28:14,059 Elizabeth: AND I DON'T FEEL LIKE OH, THAN I SHOULD BE 423 00:28:14,059 --> 00:28:18,496 DIRECTING. THAT'S NOT WHERE MY BRAIN GOES. 424 00:28:18,496 --> 00:28:20,965 I LIKE MAKING MONKS OR WHATEVER. POTTERY IS GREAT. 425 00:28:20,965 --> 00:28:23,868 NOT LIKE IT WOULD BE A CAREER. I'M NOT THAT GOOD. 426 00:28:23,868 --> 00:28:32,343 Eliz>> Stephen: NOT YET. WHO WOULDN'T BUY A MUG FROM THIS 427 00:28:32,343 --> 00:28:34,279 WOMAN. THINK ABOUT IT. 428 00:28:34,279 --> 00:28:39,384 Stephen: NEXT TIME-- Elizabeth: NEXT TIME I'M 429 00:28:39,384 --> 00:28:42,120 HERE, THESE WILL BE REPLACED. Stephen: THAT WOULD BE 430 00:28:42,120 --> 00:28:45,523 FANTASTIC. THE NEW LIMITED SERIES IS CALLED 431 00:28:45,523 --> 00:28:48,159 "LOVE AND DEATH," WHICH IS A GREAT COMBINATION AND IT'S 432 00:28:48,159 --> 00:28:50,528 GETTING A LOT OF BLOWS AND I UNDERSTAND IT'S BASED ON A TRUE 433 00:28:50,528 --> 00:28:52,197 STORY. Elizabeth: IT IS. 434 00:28:52,197 --> 00:28:59,571 IT'S BASED ON A TRUE STORY. THE STORY, LET ME TELL YOU. 435 00:28:59,571 --> 00:29:03,541 IT'S ABOUT A GROUP OF YOUNG FAMILIES LIVING IN TEXAS AND 436 00:29:03,541 --> 00:29:06,911 SLICK AND PRAIRIE IN 1978 AND THEY HAVE DONE ALL THE THINGS 437 00:29:06,911 --> 00:29:11,983 THAT THEY FELT LIKE THEY NEEDED TO DO, THEY HAVE FAMILIES, KIDS, 438 00:29:11,983 --> 00:29:19,924 CHURCH COMMUNITY AND MY CHARACTER IS NOT HAPPY WITH JUST 439 00:29:19,924 --> 00:29:25,096 THAT AND SHE-- LIKE WE WATCHED IN THE CLIP, SHE 440 00:29:25,096 --> 00:29:30,535 TO HAVE AN AFFAIR. VERY PLANNED OUT. 441 00:29:30,535 --> 00:29:33,037 Stephen: VERY RESERVED PROPOSITION. 442 00:29:33,037 --> 00:29:35,273 Elizabeth: YES. THEY PLAN IT OUT FOR MONTHS, 443 00:29:35,273 --> 00:29:41,146 THIS AFFAIR, TRUE STORY. AND IT'S FOLLOWED BY A 444 00:29:41,146 --> 00:29:46,184 SUBSEQUENT MURDERING OF HIS WIFE. 445 00:29:46,184 --> 00:29:48,153 Stephen: WE HAVE A CLIP OF SOMETHING BEHIND THE SCENES. 446 00:29:48,153 --> 00:29:50,989 Elizabeth: OH, GOSH. Stephen: THERE IS NO SOUND. 447 00:29:50,989 --> 00:29:54,058 Elizabeth: NO, NO SOUND. IT WAS TAPED IT TO DIO VILLAGE 448 00:29:54,058 --> 00:29:57,896 WHERE PEOPLE WATCH THINGS WHILE YOU'RE SHOOTING THEM. 449 00:29:57,896 --> 00:30:01,733 I HAVE A HUGE FEAR OF ROLLER COASTERS. 450 00:30:01,733 --> 00:30:04,435 Stephen: YOU PERSONALLY. Elizabeth: MY CHARACTER, 451 00:30:04,435 --> 00:30:08,773 THE SCENE BEFORE IS A HARD CUT FROM "YOU LIKE ROLLER COASTERS" 452 00:30:08,773 --> 00:30:12,510 TO US BEING ON A ROLLER COASTER AND WE GOT TO THE CHUTE AND I 453 00:30:12,510 --> 00:30:15,914 KNEW I WAS GOING TO BE TOO SCARED TO DO IT A LOT SO I ASKED 454 00:30:15,914 --> 00:30:21,452 THEM TO BRING IN MY STUNT DOUBLE MARVEL MOVIES. 455 00:30:21,452 --> 00:30:29,360 SHE DOES LOTS OF AMAZING STUNTS. THEY NEED TO DO IT ON MY FACE 456 00:30:29,360 --> 00:30:32,897 FOR SOME OF IT. I BROKE DOWN INTO TEARS.& 457 00:30:32,897 --> 00:30:35,600 Stephen: HAD YOU EVER RIDDEN A ROLLER COASTER BEFORE? 458 00:30:35,600 --> 00:30:38,703 Elizabeth: I HAD AND THAT IT WAS TOO SCARY. 459 00:30:38,703 --> 00:30:43,274 I DIDN'T EXPECT TO CRY. I'M NOT A DRAMATIC PERSON 460 00:30:43,274 --> 00:30:44,442 PREDATOR LINK DRAWING ATTENTION TO MYSELF. 461 00:30:44,442 --> 00:30:47,979 I DON'T LIKE TAKING AWAY TIME FROM SHOOTING BUT IT WAS A 462 00:30:47,979 --> 00:30:50,815 HORRIBLE, HORRIBLE FEELING. THIS IS THE VIDEO OF THE ONE 463 00:30:50,815 --> 00:30:53,685 TAKE THAT I DID ON THE ROLLER COASTER. 464 00:30:53,685 --> 00:30:59,891 OR A SNIPPET OF IT. [LAUGHS] 465 00:30:59,891 --> 00:31:04,229 MY CHARACTER REALLY WAS SUPPOSED TO ENJOY IT. 466 00:31:04,229 --> 00:31:09,100 Stephen: YOU'RE HAVING A GREAT TIME. 467 00:31:09,100 --> 00:31:12,203 Elizabeth: SWEET JESSE WAS REALLY THERE FOR ME IN THAT 468 00:31:12,203 --> 00:31:14,072 MOMENT. AND THEN WE START GOING 469 00:31:14,072 --> 00:31:17,809 BACKWARDS. THEY THOUGHT THIS WAS A GOOD 470 00:31:17,809 --> 00:31:20,211 IDEA FOR SOMEONE WHO IS SCARED OF ROLLER COASTERS. 471 00:31:20,211 --> 00:31:23,915 YOU DO THE WHOLE THING AND THEN YOU START DOING THE WHOLE THING 472 00:31:23,915 --> 00:31:26,050 BACKWARDS. THAT WAS WHEN I WAS LIKE OKAY, 473 00:31:26,050 --> 00:31:28,653 I'M JUST GOING TO PRETEND TO BE THE CHARACTER BUT THE CHARACTER 474 00:31:28,653 --> 00:31:32,090 WOULDN'T TALK THE WHOLE TIME AND I'M JUST TALKING THE WHOLE TIME. 475 00:31:32,090 --> 00:31:34,792 TRYING TO BE LIKE OH, HOW MUCH FUN WAS THAT? 476 00:31:34,792 --> 00:31:37,629 THAT WAS SO FUN. Stephen: TO JOIN ANY POINT 477 00:31:37,629 --> 00:31:38,997 ENJOY IT? Elizabeth: NO. 478 00:31:38,997 --> 00:31:41,766 Stephen: THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR BEING HERE. 479 00:31:41,766 --> 00:31:47,138 "LOVE AND DEATH" PREMIEES APRIL. ELIZABETH OLSEN, EVERYBODY. 480 00:31:47,138 --> 00:31:49,707 WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK WITH COMEDIAN JENNA FRIEDMAN. 481 00:31:54,212 --> 00:32:00,118 ♪ ♪ 482 00:32:00,118 --> 00:32:05,990 [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] Stephen: ILL-TIMED. 483 00:32:05,990 --> 00:32:09,027 WELCOME BACK. LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, 484 00:32:09,027 --> 00:32:10,762 MY NEXT GUEST IS A STAND-UP COMEDIAN AND WRITER WHO'S NEW 485 00:32:10,762 --> 00:32:14,065 BOOK IS CALLD "NOT FUNNY." PLEASE WELCOME BACK T 486 00:32:14,065 --> 00:32:27,211 "THE LATE SHOW," JENA FRIEDMAN. ♪ ♪ 487 00:32:27,211 --> 00:32:32,317 [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] NICE TO SEE YOU AGAIN. 488 00:32:32,317 --> 00:32:35,320 ALWAYS GOOD TO SEE YOU. Jena: SO NICE TO SEE YOU, 489 00:32:35,320 --> 00:32:37,755 STEVIE. Stephen: HAVE YOU BEEN IN 490 00:32:37,755 --> 00:32:41,225 HERE IN PERSON SINCE COVID? I KNOW WE TALKED IN COVID. 491 00:32:41,225 --> 00:32:43,728 I CAN'T REMEMBER IF I'VE SEEN YOU IN THE FLESH. 492 00:32:43,728 --> 00:32:48,299 SINCE THE LAST TIME I KNOW THATT I SAW YOU IN THE FLESH, YOU 493 00:32:48,299 --> 00:32:51,235 BECOME A MOTHER. CONGRATULATIONS ON THAT. 494 00:32:51,235 --> 00:32:53,304 IT'S A BIG DEAL. HOW IS IT GOING? 495 00:32:53,304 --> 00:33:00,345 Jena: IT'S GREAT. IT'S SO REWARDING. 496 00:33:00,345 --> 00:33:03,014 NO, IT'S GREAT. IT'S GREAT. 497 00:33:03,014 --> 00:33:06,551 HE'S WONDERFUL. HEALTHY. 498 00:33:06,551 --> 00:33:09,520 WHATEVER. WHATEVER THEY WANT TO BE, I'M 499 00:33:09,520 --> 00:33:11,522 SORRY. Stephen: I WASN'T ASKING 500 00:33:11,522 --> 00:33:14,492 FOR THAT REASON. Jena: I WAS LIKE, STEPHEN, 501 00:33:14,492 --> 00:33:19,030 I LOVE YOUR SHOW PAIR YOU ARE SO PROGRESSIVE. 502 00:33:19,030 --> 00:33:21,766 Stephen: WANTS HIS NAME? Jena: THERE IS A NAME. 503 00:33:21,766 --> 00:33:26,838 BEFORE I GET INTO IT, ONLY FOUND OUT WE WERE PREGNANT, SORRY, I 504 00:33:26,838 --> 00:33:31,109 KNOW THAT IS SO CHEESY. WE FOUND OUT MY HUSBAND WAS 505 00:33:31,109 --> 00:33:32,443 PREGNANT. Stephen: THIS IS THE TWO OF 506 00:33:32,443 --> 00:33:37,215 YOU TOGETHER WITH THE BABY. THE FAMILY, THE VERY HUNGARY 507 00:33:37,215 --> 00:33:42,687 CATERPILLAR IN THIS COSTUME? THAT'S PRETTY CUTE. 508 00:33:42,687 --> 00:33:44,722 Jena: STEPHEN IS TRYING TO MAKE IT SWEET AND I'M TRYING TO 509 00:33:44,722 --> 00:33:51,696 LAUNCH INTO SOMETHING DICEY. WHEN WE FOUND OUT THAT WHEN WE 510 00:33:51,696 --> 00:33:55,933 FOUND OUT MY HUSBAND WAS PREGNANT WE DECIDED TO GIVE IT A 511 00:33:55,933 --> 00:34:02,407 PET NAME. IT'S FETUS AND NOT A PERSON. 512 00:34:02,407 --> 00:34:08,880 BECAUSE MY HUSBAND'S LAST NAME IS EPSTEIN, NATURALLY WE NAMES 513 00:34:08,880 --> 00:34:18,456 THE FETUS JEFFREY. AND I HAD A PREGNANCY APP AND 514 00:34:18,456 --> 00:34:21,058 EVERY WEEK THEY WOULD SEND ME A NEW REMINDER. 515 00:34:21,058 --> 00:34:23,961 JEFFREY EPSTEIN IS THE SIZE OF A KUMQUAT. 516 00:34:23,961 --> 00:34:26,764 IT WAS SO CUTE. WE NAMED THE FETUS JEFFREY 517 00:34:26,764 --> 00:34:31,669 BECAUSE I WAS 39 WHEN I GOT PREGNANT, HIGH-RISK PREGNANCY 518 00:34:31,669 --> 00:34:35,072 AND GOD FORBID ANYTHING HAPPEN, WE WANTED TO BE ABLE TO SAY 519 00:34:35,072 --> 00:34:47,351 MAYBE JEFFREY EPSTEIN KILLED HIMSELF. 520 00:34:47,351 --> 00:34:50,188 [APPLAUSE] I WASN'T GOING TO DO THE BIT BUT 521 00:34:50,188 --> 00:34:54,358 I'M SLY, I HAVE TO GIVE STEPHEN SOMETHING TO CUT BECAUSE WE ARE 522 00:34:54,358 --> 00:34:57,261 NOT LIVE AND I FEEL LIKE THAT'S MY GIFT TO YOU. 523 00:34:57,261 --> 00:35:01,399 Stephen: I LOVE IT. I ABSOLUTELY LOVE IT. 524 00:35:01,399 --> 00:35:05,970 IF ANYONE EVER SAW THAT, THEY WOULD LOVE AND TOO. 525 00:35:05,970 --> 00:35:11,576 THE NEW BOOK, AND I DISAGREE, IS CALLED "NOT FUNNY." 526 00:35:11,576 --> 00:35:16,948 THIS MIGHT BE A SURPRISE TO THE AUDIENCE BUT YOU DO NOT SHY AWAY 527 00:35:16,948 --> 00:35:22,353 FROM CONTROVERSIAL HUMOR. DID YOUR EDITOR FIGHT WITH YOU 528 00:35:22,353 --> 00:35:24,055 ON ANYTHING? I HAVE WRITTEN BOOKS AND THEY 529 00:35:24,055 --> 00:35:26,324 HAVE SAID YOU CAN PUT THAT IN THERE. 530 00:35:26,324 --> 00:35:29,560 WAS THERE ANYTHING THAT YOU WANTED TO PUT IN THE DIDN'T GET 531 00:35:29,560 --> 00:35:32,697 IN? Jena: I HAD AN IDEA TO HAVE 532 00:35:32,697 --> 00:35:34,799 A FAMOUS PERSON WRITE THE FORWARD AND I THOUGHT IT WOULD 533 00:35:34,799 --> 00:35:39,337 BE FUNNY TO ACTUALLY HAVE SOMEONE NAMED BILL COSBY WHO 534 00:35:39,337 --> 00:35:45,943 WASN'T BILL COSBY. Stephen: SO "NOT FUNNY" 535 00:35:45,943 --> 00:35:49,914 WITH A FORWARD BY THE COSBY.& Jena: THAT SELLS THE JOKE. 536 00:35:49,914 --> 00:35:54,185 "NOT FUNNY" JUST LOOKS LIKE A FEMINIST DIATRIBE, NOT THAT IT'S 537 00:35:54,185 --> 00:35:56,153 NOT. BUT WITH BILL COSBY. 538 00:35:56,153 --> 00:35:59,190 I NEED TO FIND THE BILL COSBY WHO IS NOT THAT BILL COSBY. 539 00:35:59,190 --> 00:36:07,732 THERE HAVE TO BE SOME. I REOPEN MY FACEBOOK ACCOUNT 540 00:36:07,732 --> 00:36:10,668 WHICH I HAD CLOSE TO HIM THAN I REOPENED IT. 541 00:36:10,668 --> 00:36:14,272 WHEN ZUCKERBERG MET WITH TRUMP. I REOPENED IT AND FIND IT A 542 00:36:14,272 --> 00:36:15,406 BUNCH OF PEOPLE NAMED BILL COSBY. 543 00:36:15,406 --> 00:36:19,844 I DON'T KNOW IF YOU READ BUT HERE'S A BOOK. 544 00:36:19,844 --> 00:36:22,246 I WILL PAY YOU TO WRITE A FORWARD. 545 00:36:22,246 --> 00:36:29,921 NO ONE GOT BACK TO ME AND THEN A FRIEND OF MINE, HE SAID WHAT IF 546 00:36:29,921 --> 00:36:31,722 THOSE AREN'T PEOPLE NAMED BILL COSBY. 547 00:36:31,722 --> 00:36:37,695 WHAT IF THEY ARE JUST FANS BILL COSBY NOW AND THEY KNOW 548 00:36:37,695 --> 00:36:39,030 THE-- SO I GOT SCARED AND THEN A 549 00:36:39,030 --> 00:36:42,833 FRIEND OF MINE THAT I GREW UP WITH SAID I FOUND A BILL COSBY 550 00:36:42,833 --> 00:36:45,770 ON LINKEDIN AND HE IS DOWN TO DO IT. 551 00:36:45,770 --> 00:36:53,878 AND THEN MY EDITOR WHO WAS ALSO BRILLIANT, MAYBE DON'T DO THAT. 552 00:36:53,878 --> 00:36:57,782 IS A LOT OF GOOD STUFF IN THE BOOK I THINK A FORWARD BY 553 00:36:57,782 --> 00:37:02,887 BILL COSBY MIGHT DISTRACT FROM THAT. 554 00:37:02,887 --> 00:37:05,923 HE WAS PROBABLY RIGHT. Stephen: WHY DID YOU CALL 555 00:37:05,923 --> 00:37:09,694 IT "NOT FUNNY." THAT IS NOT AN APT DESCRIPTION 556 00:37:09,694 --> 00:37:15,466 OF YOU. Jena: TO SOME PEOPLE IT IS. 557 00:37:15,466 --> 00:37:18,669 THERE ARE A LOT OF REASONS. ONE I TALK ABOUT IN THE BOOK. 558 00:37:18,669 --> 00:37:22,273 ANOTHER REASON AROUND THE TIME WHEN I WROTE THE BOOK I HAD 559 00:37:22,273 --> 00:37:25,910 TWEETED SOMETHING THAT PEOPLE GOT VERY UPSET ABOUT. 560 00:37:25,910 --> 00:37:31,482 Stephen: OH OH? Jena: SHOCKING. 561 00:37:31,482 --> 00:37:36,787 IT WAS AROUND THE TIME OF THE RNC AND I HAD FOUND OUT THAT THE 562 00:37:36,787 --> 00:37:41,192 MCCLOSKEYS, THIS COUPLE, IF YOU DON'T REMEMBER, POINTED A GUN AT 563 00:37:41,192 --> 00:37:44,161 PROTESTERS, WERE THEN INVITED TO SPEAK AT THE RNC. 564 00:37:44,161 --> 00:37:46,130 Stephen: THE COUPLE IN ST. LOUIS ON THEIR LAWN. 565 00:37:46,130 --> 00:37:50,101 Jena: I THOUGHT IT WAS A WEIRD THING TO HAVE ON YOUR 566 00:37:50,101 --> 00:37:54,839 RESUME, TO BE A SPEAKER AT A NATIONAL CONVENTION. 567 00:37:54,839 --> 00:37:59,810 SO I HAD A VERIFIED ACCOUNT, I STILL DO BUT BACK IN THE DAY THE 568 00:37:59,810 --> 00:38:00,945 BLUE CHECK PEOPLE THOUGHT IT MEANT SOMETHING. 569 00:38:00,945 --> 00:38:05,716 NOW IT'S A DIFFERENT TIME. BUT BACK THEN HAVING A BLUE 570 00:38:05,716 --> 00:38:07,284 CHECK MARK, IF YOU TWEET BREAKING NEWS, PEOPLE THINK IT'S 571 00:38:07,284 --> 00:38:10,121 REAL. EVEN IF YOU'RE A COMEDIAN THAT 572 00:38:10,121 --> 00:38:14,025 EVEN IF YOU HAVE IN YOUR BIO, DON'T QUOTE ME. 573 00:38:14,025 --> 00:38:19,730 I TWEETED "BREAKING NEWS: BROCK TURNER, SWIMMER/SEXUAL PREDATOR 574 00:38:19,730 --> 00:38:26,971 SPEAKING OF THE RNC." I ALSO TWEETED "THAT WHO GAVE 575 00:38:26,971 --> 00:38:28,939 WORLD COVID SPEAKING AT THE RNC." 576 00:38:28,939 --> 00:38:32,176 I THOUGHT PEOPLE WOULD GET THAT IT WAS A JOKE. 577 00:38:32,176 --> 00:38:38,883 PEOPLE GOT VERY UPSET. A STANFORD PROFESSOR WAITED AND 578 00:38:38,883 --> 00:38:43,054 SAID... Stephen: COMEDIANS TWEET 579 00:38:43,054 --> 00:38:46,891 ABOUT BROCK TURNER AND THE RNC "NOT FUNNY," STANFORD PROFESSOR 580 00:38:46,891 --> 00:38:50,327 SAID. DID YOU GO TO STANFORD? 581 00:38:50,327 --> 00:38:52,930 Jena: I WENT TO YOUR SCHOOL. 582 00:38:52,930 --> 00:38:57,768 Stephen: THAT'S IT. WE RUN ALL OF OUR JOKES BY THIS 583 00:38:57,768 --> 00:38:59,236 GUY. Jena: YEAH. 584 00:38:59,236 --> 00:39:04,575 I THINK IT WAS A WOMAN, BUT WHATEVER. 585 00:39:04,575 --> 00:39:12,149 [LAUGHTER] IT WAS FUNNY TO ME THE 586 00:39:12,149 --> 00:39:15,319 CONVERSATION BECAME, COMEDIAN TWEETED THIS THING INSTEAD OF 587 00:39:15,319 --> 00:39:18,823 "WOW, A CRITICAL MASS OF THE COUNTRY ACTUALLY BELIEVES THAT 588 00:39:18,823 --> 00:39:21,492 IT CONVICTED SEX OFFENDER WOULD BE SPEAKING AT THE RNC" AS 589 00:39:21,492 --> 00:39:30,334 OPPOSED TO JUST ONES THAT HAVEN'T YET BEEN CONVICTED. 590 00:39:30,334 --> 00:39:32,169 [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] Stephen: JENA, SO GOOD TO 591 00:39:32,169 --> 00:39:36,974 HAVE YOU HERE. HER NEW BOOK, "NOT FUNNY," 592 00:39:36,974 --> 00:39:39,343 AND IT IS. IT'S AVAILABLE NOW. 593 00:39:39,343 --> 00:39:41,579 JENA FRIEDMAN, EVERYBODY. WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK. 594 00:40:00,030 --> 00:40:02,133 {\an8}Stephen: THAT'S IT FOR "THE LATE SHOW" TUNE IN TOMORROW 595 00:40:02,133 --> 00:40:05,035 {\an8}WHERE MY GUESTS ARE RACHEL WEISZ AND DANNY TREJO 596 00:40:05,035 --> 00:40:07,104 {\an8}STICK AORUND FOR JAMES GOOD NIGHT!