- Hi. - How you doing?
- Don't shake my hand. Give me a hug.
- 10 fearless singles took a daring chance on love.
They married as complete strangers.
And in only three weeks,
They'll have to make a decision as to whether
They'll stay married or get a divorce.
[dramatic music]
Last time, our couples took a deeper dive
Into trust and intimacy with their spouses.
- ♪ tell me, are you found or lost? ♪
- Stacia and nate.
- This exercise is working
To build trust, get closer.
- Gotta pull that up a little bit.
- It's definitely building trust,
'cause I would not do this with anybody else.
- ♪ dance around, around the crowd, they're smilin' ♪
- Wait, wait, wait!
- Krysten and mitch.
- I like that.
It's really great to be intimate
Without being intimate.
I like that.
- ♪ so dance, dance ♪
- Lindy and miguel.
- You're gonna cuddle it more than me?
- [laughs]
- Miguel's a natural with migindy.
I can see that he'll be a good baby daddy.
♪ ♪
- Morgan and binh.
- Would you be able to accept a full apology?
- Yeah. That would really show me
That you're starting to, like,
Really, really own up to everything,
That you've really understood.
You say you feel guilty,
But I don't feel that you feel guilty.
♪ ♪
- Alexis and justin.
- If it's a weekend, I get parts of you.
I get a few hours.
And sometimes I want you the whole weekend.
And in your opinion, that's smothering you.
- I--I have friends.
I would like to hang out with them.
That's it.
♪ ♪
- Tonight, we welcome guest expert devon franklin
And sit down with each couple
To confront the truth and any lingering questions
They might have about their marriage.
- When I hear something like that,
It's just a little alarming,
Because cheating is not really a great thing.
♪ ♪
- You're never gonna have a happy marriage
If you're trying to control who talks to her
When, how, and where.
- To me, this sounds like your decision day.
Do you feel, at this point, that the marriage is over?
♪ ♪
- If you ever have a question whether you have to choose me,
Choose whatever else.
- The last thing I want for either one of us
Is a loveless marriage.
- It sounds like a threat to me.
- I think that if you talk this over--
- I'm gonna stop you right there, dr. Pepper.
I have had it!
And I'm done.
- This is all so blindsiding to me.
- Oh, my god!
Is this blindsiding to anybody?
♪ ♪
- ♪ it's all or nothing ♪
- This is "married at first sight."
- ♪ there's no other way ♪
♪ ♪
♪ it's all or nothing ♪
- ♪ so real ♪
♪ now this is how the body should feel ♪
♪ we gon' have a good time ♪
- Hi, little migindy.
- You're gonna put a hat on him?
- It seems like our time is coming to a close.
- Aww.
- It's been real, but I's gots to say
Youse gots to go, little buddy.
- I loved seeing you interact with him.
It was so cute.
And you really did the brunt of the parenting.
- Even as our couples understand
The person they married more and more each day,
There are still challenges that will continue to arise
In their relationships.
- So tired of being sad. Ugh.
Gotta start one foot in front of the other.
We just have to get there.
- These hurdles will have to be understood and overcome...
♪ ♪
Because in just two weeks, they will have to decide
Whether to stay married or get a divorce.
- Okay, good luck in the cruel, cruel world.
See you later.
♪ ♪
Good [bleep] riddance, you demon.
No, just kidding. [both laughing]
[upbeat music]
♪ ♪
Both: Hi.
- How are you? - Good.
- So good to see you.
I'm really looking forward to meeting up with stephanie.
I've always jelled with her. I really like her.
She knows mitch really well, and she knows what he needs.
So I think that in these days leading up to decision day,
I think it's a great time to meet with her.
Both: Cheers.
- I love that we're having a one-on-one,
'cause I feel like we've hung out,
But it's always been, like, with the boys, basically.
- Yeah. It's hard to have, like, a--
- A girl talk. - Yeah.
Well, we can get into it.
- Okay. - [laughs]
Right now, I think we're both probably
In the best spot we've been.
But for me, I struggled a little bit
With his contrarianism.
And that is one thing that has been hard for me
On the journey.
- So I feel like sometimes, like, he doesn't take
The extra effort to think about, like,
"oh, how should I deliver it nicely?"
- Oh, yeah.
- Years ago, right, like, when he and I were, like,
Still learning how to, like, get along
With each other--like, I have very strong
Opinions and perspectives.
And, you know... - You go, girl.
- I will bend to no one.
So it was like,
Sometimes I feel like he and I
Were at odds because of the way
That he presented things sometimes.
- Mm-hmm, mm-hmm.
- It felt, like, almost like I naturally became defensive
And, like, held my ground because, like, he was coming,
You know? - Yeah.
- And he's my brother-in-law, so I, like, respect
The things he's saying. So there's, like,
A lot of changes that I've made.
We don't use, like, the pouches
And, like, the things like that, right?
- Yeah, yeah.
- But we still use diapers.
We are very conscious,
But we're not to the level that he is.
And, like, he's changed a lot with the way
That he, like, communicates and delivers.
You know, and I think he's also learned over the years,
Though, that, like, making people feel bad
Is not the way to get change, but more so,
Like, presenting the why.
- Yup.
- Yeah, I don't know if that helps.
- No, that helps, actually.
I just wanted to hear that you--
You kind of-- you noticed it too,
But you guys were able to work through it
Based on your personalities together.
- Yeah. - I want to be, you know,
His co-pilot in the mission.
I think I just need more information.
- You know, be really honest. - Mm-hmm.
- Put it out there.
Like, it's scary to be vulnerable,
But just, like, be really clear on, like,
What are your things that, like, you can't bend on
And, like, what are the things, like, your fears
Of, like, the way things have been?
'cause I want him to be happy, but I also want you to be happy
Too, like, with both of you, right?
And it's like you're not gonna be happy
If both of you aren't happy together.
So just, like, making it clear the things
That you need from each other.
And he has to be patient for change.
But at the same time, don't, like,
Delay saying what you want.
♪ ♪
[upbeat music]
- ♪ yeah, I don't care what anybody says ♪
♪ about me, I'm a go-getter ♪
♪ pace setter, girl ♪
♪ oh, me, I am the lead ♪
♪ rock to the moon, yeah, yeah ♪
- All right. Hello. - Hi.
- You guys, how you doing? - Doing well. How are you?
- Good. - Good.
You guys ready for some action today?
- Yes, definitely. - Oh, yeah. Ready to do it.
- All right, let's go. - Thank you.
- Kiss my axe! - Kiss my axe.
- That's what I'm gonna be saying to you when I beat you.
♪ ♪
So I start. We go from...
Both: 1, 2, 3, 4, bullseye.
- Yeah.
- ♪ I got the right hook ♪
- Ooh, that was almost.
- ♪ no, I'm coming with the fire ♪
♪ but I leave you shook ♪
- Yes, one.
- ♪ yeah, that's all it took, I'm gonna catch ya ♪
♪ I bet I made you look ♪
- Yes!
- ♪ you don't have to just arrive ♪
♪ when it's understood that no matter what ♪
- I'm sucking.
I suck at axe throwing, apparently.
- That's a three. - Nice, you got it.
Just didn't--I don't know, I need to get--like,
I can't be a man if I can't throw an axe, you know?
♪ ♪
- ♪ and I break it gotta win the trial ♪
♪ hear me now ♪
♪ it's gonna be a knockout ♪
- I think that is four. - That is a four!
- Yeah.
And here I am still on one.
♪ ♪
- Damn. Okay.
[giggling]
[axe thuds]
Blue one. Damn, right.
- And watch her get it on the first [bleep] try.
Nice! - Yes!
- Damn!
That is incredible.
Espn is gon-- you're gonna get called.
No, for real. - Am I gonna get sponsored?
- What is that? Yo!
She [bleep] whupped my ass.
- I'm really happy that you're not a sore loser.
- It's hard to be a sore loser when, at the end of the day,
I feel like I'm overall winning.
The way I see it, and I'm actually not even kidding,
Like, my life is good... - Aww.
- Even though I suck at axe throwing.
- You're not bad, though.
It's just I'm just a little bit better.
[laughs] - you know what they say.
If you're not number one, it doesn't matter.
- [laughs]
Um...
I still know that, like, we're getting to know each other,
But, like, I do feel us growing closer every day,
Like, the more you do get to know me
And the more I get to know you.
- Right. - But at the same time,
You know, just as quickly as we've connected,
It's scary to think that, like, if something
Were to happen because, for me,
There are so many feelings there.
- That's right, yeah.
- Like, I just would be afraid that,
I don't know, just...
Irrationally, something happens and--I don't know.
It's just a fear.
It would be surprising if there was an explosion,
But it's just not--I guess it's just not off the table
Because there's just so much unknown that could happen
In the next few weeks and months and years,
Or whatever, you know. I don't know.
- You--here's the thing.
Like, as romantic as I am, I will never probably give you,
"yes, don't worry.
Like, you know, to forever."
[tense music]
'cause it just seems too cheap to say that,
'cause I don't know.
♪ ♪
- Okay. I can--I hear that.
I don't like it, but I accept it,
And I respect that mindset.
- Would you wanna be, like, in a loveless marriage?
- That's a tough question, because you can always
Find love again if you work hard enough.
- Okay, I disagree with you.
I could be, like, over the moon in love with you.
But if you came to me one day and you're like,
"miguel, I am not happy."
The last thing I want for either one of us
Is a loveless marriage.
- Then we work on it. - I would try to work on it.
But what if we do work on it and you're like, "I'm sorry--"
- You're getting lost in the--
You're stressing me out. - I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
- You're getting, like, so far ahead.
And, like, you're spinning me out over here.
- I know. I know.
- Like, I internalize it as, like, if I'm not providing you
With the love you need, if I'm not catering to you,
Then you're out.
That's what I hear. - Right.
- I'll be honest.
It sounds like a threat to me.
- Hmm. Well, I'm sorry.
It's not a threat, but--this is gonna
Piss you off probably even more--it's the reality of it.
♪ ♪
[upbeat music]
- ♪ everything ♪
♪ everything you want, I'll do it for you ♪
- Will. What's up, my guy? - Hey, what's going on, boss?
- Good to see you again. - Good to see you too, man.
Good to see you too.
- I wanted to get married at first sight
And find my person.
So I'm setting up a meeting with will.
We're gonna chop it up and see if I can get
Some perspective, because I know how important
Will is to alexis.
And so getting that perspective
From somebody that's close hits different.
How's life treatin' you, man?
- Life is good, man. Can't complain.
The real question is how are you doing?
- Man, I'll tell you what.
Marriage is a beast, boy. - Yeah?
- That [bleep] is just hard work.
It's uncomfortable, but it's good too.
You know what I'm sayin'?
We have good days.
We've just been-- it's been rough.
- Yeah.
- You know the dog situation? - Mm-hmm, mm-hmm.
- That's a real sensitive subject.
You know, I could've said, "you know what?
"hey, I'm keeping my dog. [bleep] this.
[bleep] this marriage," you know?
But to me, it's worth it.
It was important that my wife was comfortable
And that she felt secure in her own home.
And that's how I look at it.
- I didn't know that that was still
Something that was lingering in y'all's relationship, so...
But you as a man did what you thought you should do,
What was best for your wife.
And I think she has to see that.
- I ain't sayin' I've been perfect.
You know what I'm sayin'? Like, I've [bleep] up.
You know what I'm sayin'?
I have to check my tone sometimes when I talk to her.
I told her I'm not gonna curse at her.
Sometimes I'll be cursing at her, but I shouldn't do it.
- Yeah. - You know what I'm sayin'?
Because I also wanna practice--
If we do have kids together, I don't wanna argue
In front of our kids. - Yeah.
- What I'm learning is we're communicating
The exact same thing, we want the same thing,
But it's being communicated differently
And not understood.
- I couldn't imagine.
I couldn't imagine being in y'all's shoes
And doing it the way that you all have done it.
I think that, you know, y'all are just experiencing so much
In so little time and it's so much pressure that, like,
You know, yeah, the good is good,
But I think just the fear and the pressure
Makes the bad even worse.
- Real.
- There you go. - Mmm.
- Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.
But I think she really wants to be in this too.
And I think, again, she's just scared,
I think--I hope or, you know?
And I think that's what makes the bad worse.
But you do everything that I feel like lex
Always wanted in a man.
You're such a gentleman.
Like, you know, you're passionate, you know.
And you're funny, you know. You know.
So that's just all things that, like,
I know lex looks for in men.
And you definitely give her that.
So I think it's just that fear.
You gotta get past that fear.
- But if I know she's in it, then I'm in it.
- Yeah. - You know what I'm saying?
My fear is if I see any sign of, like, she don't know,
It just, like, makes me scared, you know.
But it's gonna be hard.
And that's my biggest fear, her just quittin'.
- Yeah.
- Honestly, I think I'm traumatized from, you know,
Women just quittin' on me.
And I'm just like, "damn."
But sometimes the grass ain't greener.
I want this [bleep], bruh.
I dead-ass want this [bleep].
♪ ♪
♪ hit the ground running, everybody's coming ♪
♪ move fast, who that, you mad? ♪
- So we're kinda getting ready. - She's already on top of it.
I'm still looking dusty.
But it's okay.
I'ma get there. [both laughing]
- With decision day around the corner,
This will be the final chance for our couples
To meet with the experts.
And we've invited guest expert devon franklin
To offer his advice as well.
- I'm getting ready to go see dr. Pepper.
She's always very, very kind and patient and helpful.
And I always say we need professional help over here.
- It's important for them to confront the truth
Within themselves and with their partner,
And examine lingering questions they have
So that they can work through them in time
To feel good about saying yes on decision day.
- ♪ at the start, boy, you were kinda sweet ♪
♪ making eyes at me, doing shots at the party ♪
♪ but you're stressed out, taking over me ♪
- Since decision day is kind of quickly approaching,
I really wanna make sure that krysten and I have
The same--that we can see eye to eye about what
Decision day means for us.
- I want to get to a place where
It is, like, a full yes from both of us on decision day.
I really wanna get there.
- Hi there. - Hi, dr. Pepper.
- Nice to see you. - You too.
- What our task is today is for me to help you navigate
Some of the things that worry you so that you
Can be truthful to each other, but I can be helpful.
So wanna start?
- I have a few. - Okay.
- Should I go through all of them?
- Well, let's start with one. - Okay.
- And then we'll try and go back and forth until--
- Yeah, we can start a little lighter
And get a little deeper, if that's okay.
- Okay. - Yeah.
- Mitch is a advocate for the environment.
Did I say that correctly?
Okay, yes.
Which I think is wonderful.
And he's educated me, and I want to continue
Educating myself on our habits.
But I just wanna make sure I'm comfortable,
You're comfortable.
A good example would be sometimes
I do find myself feeling guilty for my iced lattes.
♪ ♪
- Yeah, I've noticed that you like to get iced lattes.
I mean, I've supported you doing what you want to do
And what makes you happy. - Okay.
- You know, is that gonna break the marriage
If you forget your reusable cup one day?
It's not. - Mm-hmm.
- But will it mean a lot to me to see that you're showing up
A little bit in a way that makes me
Proud to have you beside me?
It would.
- Is there anything that, you know,
You want to do in your life that he might feel upset about
Because of those particular values?
- There is.
I think we have an unsolved disagreement.
We never really circled back or finalized
How I have a dream of owning my own business.
I want to flip houses and resell them.
Fix them up, put new windows in, new floors,
Stage them with reusable furniture
That we would put in all the homes,
And then resell them.
That's the business idea, essentially.
And it was such a sensitive topic, I feel like, for us.
We never closed the door on it.
♪ ♪
- What's the problem?
- Um, there's a big intersection
Between environmental sustainability
And social justice and class
And urbanism, I guess, and the way to develop.
You know, development in the city,
Like, it all intersects at some point.
And I had concern that kind of, like, flipping houses
To make a profit could be something that kinda competes
With working families, you know,
Just normal people who are trying to buy a house
And maybe can't afford the flipped house,
But they can afford the non-flipped house.
♪ ♪
- I think there's a way
To not put the whole big picture...
- Yeah. - On her shoulders.
[laughter] - yeah, you're right.
I think-- I mean, that's not fair.
I'm just kind of, like...
And I don't wanna be the person--a big part of my work
Is to not blame individuals for larger societal problems,
Right, 'cause that never is constructive, usually.
So I don't wanna put this whole societal issue
On your shoulders and for you to think
It's your responsibility to solve it.
Again, this just comes back to me and the way
I think and view the world.
There's always the dark side of everything we do,
Right, if we're gonna be, like, simple about it.
Like, carbon footprint, a waste footprint,
Human suffering footprint,
There's always a dark side of everything we do,
Whether you're a sculptor, a real estate agent,
An environmental guy, you drive, whatever it is.
And it's not necessarily our fault as individuals.
It's just that in society, that dark side
Is never given any notice.
So I guess my follow-up question is, like,
Can you handle that?
Like, do you want that?
'cause, like, you know what I mean?
Like, that's a lot. Like, that's...
I think that for a lot of people,
They probably wouldn't want that person in their life,
Always reminding them
Or reminding us of
The consequences of our actions.
♪ ♪
- There's a serious question there.
You know, the core of who he is
Is trying to make the world better
And seeing the circumstances under which there are choices.
And he's saying, can you support that?
[tense music]
♪ ♪
- So that is a really good segue into my final issue.
I--I don't know.
♪ ♪
- I value synergy and optimism and friendships.
And when I meet someone,
I'm kind of avoiding, initially,
All their "bad qualities,"
And I'm only fixated on their good.
And your contrarianism does affect me.
♪ ♪
I think it's very good in so many ways,
Especially in saving the world.
Maybe I'm just looking for help from you,
Honestly, on how-- how to make sure
That I can be the person who can be there for you.
I know I want to, but I know that it's
Really affected me when you do show me the dark side.
- So one thing I would have you think of
Is how much growth you've already done
In a very short period of time.
And why wouldn't you think
There would be more as you go along?
There will be.
- Again, I just wanna make sure--
And this goes back to my whole, you know,
Freakin' proclamation of being the dark side guy or whatever.
- Yeah. - I wanna just make sure, like,
Like, if we continue this journey,
Like, that's me thinking, like, that doesn't go away.
Maybe I'm more respectful about it.
Maybe I'm more supportive about it, but it never goes away.
♪ ♪
She could easily think, "well, you know what?
Maybe my ideal husband, I don't have to worry
Or deal with that at all."
'cause there's a lot of guys out there
Who don't think about any of this stuff.
- Well, they didn't show up yet.
[laughter]
- True. - Very true.
- I mean, there's always the ideal guy
Who comes with no issues
And the ideal woman who's just perfect
On these ideals that you share
And is crummy in some other way.
I mean, we can never fulfill an endless list.
- Yeah.
- That's what keeps people single.
Are there things that are differences?
You bet.
But the question is, you know, if the commitment's
Still there and if you feel there's enough core things
That make your life better together than not.
- Mm-hmm.
- Now, I don't know what else is inside
That you wanna talk about, 'cause this is
A good time to talk about it.
- Um...
I had a question about what decision day means to you
And what it takes.
You know, like, we haven't said I love you.
We've actually kind of put the brakes
On the sex life a little bit recently.
And do you still have those same standards
For decision day or have you changed them a little bit?
And the reason I ask is 'cause for me, like,
If we really feel like we're-- like our journey isn't over yet
And there's still progress to be made
And we still feel like we're in it,
That's pretty much gonna be enough for me.
- I said that the day after you told me
That you were not attracted to me on the honeymoon.
So I look at decision day way different
Because of how far we've both come.
We've made our own progress that actually works
For what really matters in a marriage.
So I think I'm actually on the same page as you now.
So I think we'll figure out the sex.
In terms of the love, I think the only outstanding thing
I have that I--and ask would just be
That you are committed to try and fall in love
And will let down your walls
To fall in love with me specifically.
I don't need an "I'm in love with you right now,"
But I do need a hope for commitment
To see yours-- being open to get there.
- Yeah, absolutely.
- Do you feel that way?
- Yeah, I do feel that way.
I'm open to falling in love with you.
I'm open to continuing to work on our marriage.
And I'm glad that you are too.
- Thank you. Thanks. - You're welcome.
- Sorry, lipstick.
- I've said that I'm afraid of falling in love before
Because, you know, with falling in love
Does come the opportunity to get hurt.
It could be coddled, but it could also be
Smashed with a sledgehammer.
But I'm a lot more willing to go all in.
I'll do the work.
- Within the most recent days, I really, really wanna spend
The next couple-- whatever amount of time
Before decision day devoted to being all in,
Completely letting down my walls,
Ready to just accept--
Love, accept you, be vulnerable.
And today has been very helpful.
I've said the things I was worried about.
You had magnificent responses.
And I feel really good.
♪ ♪
[upbeat music]
- ♪ looking for love ♪
♪ for love, yeah ♪
♪ looking for love ♪
♪ for love ♪
- Hey, hey. - Hi. Good to see you.
- Good to see you too. - I love your suit.
- Wow, look at you with the pink.
- You're matching with the pink.
- Wait, wait.
You understood the assignment. [laughter]
No. What's up? - Hey. How you doing?
- How you doing?
You guys look incredible.
- Oh, thank you.
- We wanted to impress you,
Was the only reason at the time.
- And you've done that.
So here we are.
And, you know, we get reports, of course,
Of everything that's been going on.
I heard about some of your conversations
And some of your exercises, which I found
To be quite interesting
And a little embarrassing to me.
But...[laughs] - what? Embarrassing?
- Which one? - Which one?
- I said to me. - Why?
- Well, the sex...Toys.
- Oh, so you ain't a freak? [laughter]
- Look--'cause--look.
You know, 'cause the last time I was with you guys,
You guys had not had sex.
Both: Right.
- And since then, I understand, you know...
- We have, yeah. - The sky's the limit.
- Yeah. - But no, but check this out.
So what I wanna know actually, though, is in regards to that.
You guys, you have great affection for each other
Because we were talking about love
And we were talking about how we view it.
And I gave you my opinion.
I believe that love
Ultimately comes to a decision.
It has to.
My question is where are you guys in regards to that?
Has there been some concrete decisions
Or words that have sort of solidified
What you feel for each other?
- I mean, I definitely feel like I've made
The commitment part of it.
I do have, like, those feelings as well.
- What feelings?
- Where I love him and, like, I love him
Through all the bad times and, like,
Showing him unconditional love
To get through all of that stuff.
- You just said, "I love him."
Have you ever told him that before?
- Yeah.
- And have you ever reciprocated?
- Um...
I haven't reciprocated with, like, "I love you."
But, you know, I admire my wife.
You know, I said that to her a couple of days ago.
And I think admiration ties into love
Because all the qualities that stacia has,
It's amazing, and I'm happy about that.
- Have you ever felt like saying I love you
And then stopped yourself from saying it?
- A few times, yes.
- What stopped you?
- Um...
I think I'm waiting for the right moment.
- Sure. - And one of the insecurities
Is just, like, me falling in love and getting hurt.
- Yeah.
Does that--does that come from anything in your history?
You know, have you ever been cheated on?
- Not that I know of. - Okay.
- But this is marriage, so we're gonna be together
For years and years and years.
You know, there could be more opportunities...
- Yeah. - For that stuff.
- Okay. No, no, I agree.
What about you?
Your insecurities
Were pretty much the same thing.
- Yeah. - And of course,
You've been hurt in the past.
You have been cheated on. - Oh, yeah.
- And you have not cheated.
- No, I have. - You have cheated?
- Mm-hmm. - Okay.
[tense music]
- It happened 10-plus years ago,
So it's not-- I'm not that person anymore.
- So tell me a little bit about what--
Does that-- how do you feel about that?
Or it doesn't make a difference at this point?
- Um...
Just a little bit of disappointment,
You know, because I'm married to somebody
That has had that experience in the past.
- But you're disappointed about something
That happened with her 10 years ago, plus.
- Um...I see her a certain way.
You know, I'm proud to have stacia as my wife.
And... - And you should be.
- And, you know, when I hear something like that,
It's just a little alarming because I see her as, like,
A great woman, and cheating is not really a great thing.
- How do you feel about that?
I mean, do you feel comfortable or safe to share?
- It's--it's shaky.
- Tell me more.
- I don't know what's gonna happen the next time.
- What next time?
- If I share information, am I gonna get judged?
- But you've pretty much bore your soul.
You told him.
I mean, there's nothing else.
- No, I mean, I wanna know, like, what is so terrible
And I can tell you if I've done it or not.
- If you're wondering,
"well, she hasn't told me everything,"
The question is, does she need to?
- ♪ my heart ♪
♪ can't take any more damage ♪
♪ any more damage ♪
♪ ♪
- After you. You can go first.
- Thank you.
This place is cute. Good choice.
- Thank you.
- Cheers. [laughs] - cheers.
♪ ♪
So yeah, how's it going?
Give me the dirt on lindy.
What do you have to tell me about her?
- The dirt on lindy?
My, like, longest time with her was when we went
To costa rica together.
That was when we discovered she gets hangry very easily.
- Okay.
She has yet to get hangry with me.
I don't know if it's 'cause I'm constantly feeding her
Or if she's, you know, if she's feeding off the love
We have in the relationship.
- So you guys are in love?
- Yeah.
- That's gross. - [laughs]
- Ugh. - Ugh. [laughs]
- I mean, she's very easy to love, I think.
Is--yeah, right? - Yeah.
I mean, that's why I became friends with her so quickly.
She's easy to be around. - Mm-hmm.
- Most of the time. [laughs]
- I love her sense of humor, her outgoingness.
She's very-- - she's very goofy.
It's fun. - Super goofy.
- Is there anything that you're finding that you're, like,
Not sure if it's gonna work if, like, she continues
To do some of that stuff? Or is there--
- Yeah.
That's a great question.
I think that, to be honest, like, it's funny
Because everything was sunshine and rainbows
Up until the experts thought to give us a baby.
This baby would actually cry, like, every two hours
At night, so, like, you're trying
To rest from all the stresses and decompress and whatnot.
And I think that maybe brought to surface
A little bit of, like, how we handle challenges differently.
I was saying, like, her quick to anger.
She was going from a to z in terms of, like,
Getting ramped up.
- I've noticed that.
- You have? - Mm-hmm.
- Okay, okay, tell me more about it.
Yeah. - I mean,
There's been just, like, a couple of times
At work where I'll be talking about something
That, like, somehow, she ends up taking a little bit
Personally, even though in my head, I don't think
I'm talking about her at all.
I think I'm just talking about something that I'm
Irritated with at work. - Interesting.
So she gets like defensive or?
- Yeah.
But, I mean, it's never been super big.
- Right.
What I have noticed though, too,
Is that as quick as she is to anger,
She's also quick to kind of, like,
The cycle of negativity type thing.
There is decision day.
- Decision day is a trigger word for me.
- Right. - I hate it.
I know we should talk about it. I can't.
I, like, just don't.
I don't wanna hear about it.
I don't need your insurance.
If I get hit by a car and you can't even help me
See a [bleep] physician-- so if you can't do that,
Then how the [bleep] do you expect me
To take your last name, miguel?
How?
Oh, yeah, that awkward conversation
We had right after the--
- Why--everything you say
Is, like, negative.
What the [bleep]?
The last thing I want for either one of us
Is a loveless marriage.
And you're like, "I'm sorry--"
- You're getting lost in that.
You're stressing me out.
- I'm sorry.
- You're getting, like, so far ahead.
And, like, you're spinning me out over here.
- I know. I know.
It's just, like, the negativity.
And, like, I just truly want her to work through whatever
It is that triggers her, like, to process it internally
And make peace with it so she doesn't have those outbursts,
So she's not quick to anger, you know.
- Yeah, she definitely is one of those people
That kinda needs a little bit of reassurance sometimes.
- Yeah.
- But she's usually pretty happy-go-lucky
And positive all the time.
- I've noticed that, yeah.
And, like, in the beginning, I noticed that
Right off the bat.
And I think that's why I've been kind of, like,
A little surprised.
Like, everything should not be triggering you to that extent.
Like, I cannot be--I can't feel that I have to be censored.
I don't know if it registers as a full-blown deal breaker,
But it would put me on edge.
It would, like, push me-- push us apart.
♪ ♪
[upbeat music]
- So we're meeting with the experts today.
We don't know who it is.
I'm really hopeful.
I'm gonna try to remain calm,
Be adult enough to be like, "look."
You know, I don't need to say something hurtful just 'cause
Somebody said something to hurt me
Or passive aggressive or, you know, just on attack mode.
I'm trying to be on offense, you know,
'cause we're on the same team.
- What's up, y'all? Hey.
How you doin'?
- Dr. Pepper and I brought in devon franklin
Because devon has spent a great portion of his life
Encouraging and helping people to see
Their own worth and value.
We believe this will be vital in helping alexis and justin,
Not only to develop themselves personally,
But also seeing value in their spouse.
- You know, dr. Pepper and pastor cal,
You know, sent me, and I said,
"I think I can help my brother and my sister out."
- I appreciate. I appreciate. - So I'm here.
- Yeah. - It's good to see y'all.
- You too, man. - You know,
And dr. Pepper and pastor cal have kinda given me
A lot of insight to you all and just trying to, you know,
Give me the-- what's really going on.
And so let's talk about the club.
- If it's a weekend, I get parts of you.
I get a few hours.
And sometimes I want you the whole weekend.
And in your opinion, that's smothering you.
- I--I have friends.
I would like to hang out with them.
- Tell me the feeling that being in that environment
Gives you emotionally,
- I have such a tough job.
And I have to be in control so much
That just to let loose and just let my hair down, I love it.
I love kind of-- just that freedom.
- We're gonna go a step deeper.
How free do you feel in your marriage?
- I--I feel smothered.
- How does it make you feel when you hear that?
- It's hurtful.
- I'm sorry. - What about it hurts you?
- Well, I mean, 'cause I don't wanna smother her.
You know, I want her to have her freedom.
I've always never wanted to be that guy, you know?
And to, like, to hear it, I'm like, "damn, I'm that guy."
- So this is why I wanna get beyond.
Like, the club-- it's not about that.
It's about, in my marriage, I'm repressed.
- Yes. - What would your marriage need
To look like for your marriage to represent
The freedom that you really want?
[soft music]
- Um, just us doin' it together.
- What's the it? What's the it you're talking about?
- I wanna take all that life has to offer,
Whether that's traveling, whether that's hiking,
Whether that's extreme sports, just anything--
- Okay, wait, hold up. Do you like traveling?
- Mm-hmm, I love traveling. - Okay, great.
Do you like hiking? - Mm-hmm.
- Okay, great. Keep going.
Do you like extreme sports? - Yes.
- Okay, great.
♪ ♪
Not only are there commonalities,
Not only is there a connection,
But it seems like you have a strong commitment
To her freedom. - Mm-hmm.
- So I would really encourage you to spend some time.
What's the best, freest, securest version of "we"
That we can create? - Okay.
- And what are those activities that fuel that?
Because as individuals, you've been in the "me"
For so long, you're like,
"yo, it's about me against the world."
And it's like, "no, no, now it's we against the world."
Let's figure out what that is.
Now, justin, is there anything wrong with your wife
Wanting to feel free? - No.
- So you have no problem with the feelings
That she gets from the club?
- If I had to give a short answer,
I think it's I feel like
I have a potential chance of losing her.
♪ ♪
- I'm proud of you. - This is great.
- I'm so proud of you. - [laughs]
- We're just gonna pause, all right?
- I'm sweatin' over here. - Sweat is good.
It means you care.
It means he cares. - I understand.
- So you're never gonna have a happy marriage
If you're trying to control who talks to her
When, how, and where.
- Fair.
- Right now, it's the club.
Tomorrow, it could be the gym. - [laughs]
- The day after that, it could be church.
- Yeah. - It never ends.
- I discovered that I have some insecurities.
I discovered that I'm controlling.
Did not catch that.
But when he painted that picture,
I was just like, "damn, that is really controlling.
Is that me?"
- Now, y'all, they told me something else,
And I just gotta--
- It's about us not having sex, right?
- That's it! How did you know?
- Because that's what everything is about.
- [laughing, clapping] but no--but no--
But here's the truth.
Here's the truth.
If a couple is not having sex,
It's because there's an imbalance of power
A lot of times in the marriage.
- So I'm dominant in my regular life and my job.
So for me, in the bedroom, I wanna be dominated.
- Talk to me, my brother.
- I am a dominant person,
But I'm only dominant if the energy is reciprocated.
And so what happens is I get turned off.
If the energy just is not there,
Sometimes I'll get insecure and I'm like, "oh, okay."
And so it just feels like it's just me, you know,
If that makes sense.
- I feel like I'm talking to myself.
- [laughs] - I had to stop
Looking at my wife for signs and just say,
"the 'we' is a sexually fulfilled marriage."
What she's wanting is that confident justin.
And so part of that confidence, my brother,
Is literally looking in the mirror
And loving who looks back at you.
- I wanted to get married at first sight to be loved,
And I definitely feel like it would be important
To consummate the marriage before decision day.
There's something about knowing that someone is yours
And having that freedom to just explore everything
You wanted to intimately and sexually that,
I don't know, it just makes the bond stronger.
- Marriage is, like, as beautiful as it is,
It's a mirror, and you butt naked.
And you are reflecting, you know, repression,
And you're reflecting insecurity.
Okay, that's okay. Nothing wrong with that.
But in order to heal it, it's not trying to fix the mirror.
- It's trying to fix them.
- It's not trying to fix the mirror.
It's trying to fix this.
- ♪ run away with me ♪
♪ run away with me ♪
♪ yeah, I'll give you that green light ♪
- Hello. - Hi.
- I'm nervous to see dr. Pepper today.
If this marriage doesn't work out,
It would be devastating, because my parents,
You know, they come from a very religious
Background and a very traditional background
With that, and I'm not sure their reactions--
I know my mom will love me no matter what.
But my dad, he's always been rough on me.
He's always been tough on me.
So I don't take marriage lightly.
I, for sure, don't take divorce lightly.
And I think that would be really heartbreaking.
- I wanna start with, what do you think
In a relationship brings out the best in you?
- It brings out a softer side of me with the right person,
With the right person that I can trust,
Because that softer side of me is the part
That I don't show everyone.
I only show that to people who I really, really trust.
But I know that with the right person,
That side of me does come out.
♪ ♪
- Binh, we understand that you were overwhelmed
And somewhat in a panic in the front part of this--
Well, maybe throughout this marriage.
But certainly, some of the things you did
Were very, very judgmental and distrusting.
The whole thing about whether or not she was a nurse
Was off the charts, right? - Mm-hmm.
- Hold on. Let me just--
I just wanna prove a point right now.
And I've been wanting to prove this point.
This is great. Are you ready for this?
Camera, please zoom in.
That's my license. That's my license.
That's public information.
I didn't have to log in to find this.
I didn't have to search some crazy [bleep] for this, okay?
That's googleable.
This is my googleable [bleep] license.
- When I think of our last time together,
He's been accepting 100% of the damage.
I mean, he's been truly apologizing.
And I know earlier, you didn't believe in it.
I don't know if you believe in it now.
And I don't know how that makes you feel.
- It's hard to believe when he is apologizing
Just because it's--
He's never come to me on his own and apologized.
Every time he's apologized, it's been very prompted.
But I haven't gotten that, like, remorseful, like,
"oh, my god, I wish I'd have done things differently.
Like, I feel how much pain--" you know?
I haven't felt that from him.
It's been very--there's been a disconnect there, so I--
Maybe in the future, that'll come,
That really heartfelt, one-on-one, private apology.
But so far, I just haven't gotten that yet.
♪ ♪
- Well, I can't give you a private moment
Here, right now.
But, binh, I'm curious as well,
And I think your wife should know.
How has it felt for you to be, in all these weeks,
Without what you signed up for or even to the extent
That you found out things about yourself
That you weren't so thrilled about?
- Yeah. I think for me,
Like, growing up, my parents,
Like, showed no emotions.
Pretty much, like, not intentionally, like,
Be a robot, but it's, like, you know, like,
"we say this, you do it."
Or, like, "why are you sad for? You have food on your table."
Like, so I never was able to externalize my emotions
Or put it on the outside where--
This whole experience has taught me that.
Like, I ran away from that.
I ran away from my emotions 'cause I was scared,
'cause I was angry. I didn't face it.
I didn't face anything.
I just ran and just kept running.
♪ ♪
- Do you think you're gonna get to a place
Where you accept, like yourself?
- I--I don't ev--I don't know, but I really want to.
- You deserve to be happy.
- Yeah.
- What about you?
When have you felt some pleasure during this series
Where you've been happy?
- I mean, we did have really good times together.
And we did really have, like, a really
Solid friendship at one point.
- Is that re-constructible?
[dramatic music]
- Not on my end.
♪ ♪
It's not, you know, any of that trust.
- Well, I am so sorry we've come to this.
Um...
To me, this sounds like your decision day.
Morgan, do you feel at this point
That the marriage is over?
♪ ♪
- Yeah. Yeah, the marriage is over.
And I do want the divorce.
It wasn't meant to be.
And it wasn't meant to work out.
And it's unfortunate that we had to go through
What we went through in order to find that out.
But still, you know, it has come down to a divorce.
- So, binh. - Yeah.
- Do you want a divorce?
♪ ♪
- Yeah, I want a divorce as well,
For different circumstances.
Obviously, I still need to work on myself
And figure out who I genuinely am.
And so I'm not ready to be married.
And I really thought that I was ready.
And it feels like everything was on the surface
That I was ready.
And it was only 'cause of this experience
That I realized that.
♪ ♪
It's frustrating, but the only way
We can still go from here is up.
To be the first person in my family to be divorced,
It's tough, you know.
I already felt like I'm the only one in my family
That's not a doctor, so it's, like,
Another thing that I'm not doing well in.
And I genuinely thought that it would work out.
Legends aren't measured in their losses.
They're measured in how they respond to it.
So I'm gonna try to respond the best way I can.
- ♪ you hate, say you hate me ♪
♪ you'll never be alone ♪
♪ let's bring it back home, home ♪
- Well, I was very pleasantly surprised
By how easily you problem-solved my worry
About the house flipping game
Of, like, me wanting to pursue that.
- Mm-hmm.
I'm not, like, a super capitalistic person.
But at the same time, you know, if there's a great way
To make money and it's gonna go with my values and stuff,
I'm gonna be for it.
- Yeah, no, absolutely.
I was just-- - [slurps loudly]
[quirky music]
- I was just seeking assistance
In how to navigate that.
- Yeah. - And I think that I got there.
- You know, that's part of me and it's part of the equation
That comes with being my wife.
You know what I mean? - Yeah. Yeah.
Honestly, at first, I was really worried about it.
I was like, "oh, my dear god."
♪ ♪
- [slurps]
- But living with you, it doesn't feel as extreme
As I thought it was gonna feel.
- It'll get a little bit more extreme,
But it won't be super extreme.
[tense music]
- More than current?
- Yeah.
- What do you mean?
- Um...
♪ ♪
I think that I've been a little bit more blasé
About some stuff just because I know that this
Is a kinda temporary house.
♪ ♪
[slurps]
You know, like, I don't really have paper towels.
I just use, like, cloth towels.
And I wash 'em.
- I am fine with the no paper towels,
But it will impact me if I am the one
Constantly washing the cloth.
- [slurps]
I think it's just all about having a system.
- I agree.
♪ ♪
- [slurps]
♪ ♪
[slurps]
- Do you always eat like this and I've never noticed?
- No, sorry.
- Oh, my god.
I'm really confused today about how mitch is eating.
- [slurps]
- I think he's just really hungry.
I'm gonna go with he was just really hungry.
[both laughing]
I think I covered all my bases.
Do you feel like we covered your bases?
- I mean, there's still things that are gonna come up.
- Yeah. - I'm just leaving
A little space for things that maybe
Haven't come up yet, and we don't even
Know they haven't come up yet.
But they will come up.
There's always gonna be more to deal with.
- Yeah. - And that's part of life,
So--you know? - Mm-hmm.
- I think one thing that I wanted to bring up
But I decided not to,
And it's such a superficial thing,
But I really like the way kristen looks,
Like, more naturally.
I mean, that's kind of, like, I guess, cliché
As to who I am 'cause I'm more of a natural guy.
But, like, I haven't figured out
The right way to do it yet because I think
It's a sensitive subject.
♪ ♪
- I feel really good.
- Agreed.
♪ ♪
- ♪ hot track, coming for the crown ♪
♪ I want it, fix your face ♪
♪ with that frown, ironic ♪
♪ so iconic ♪
♪ yeah, you know I want it ♪
♪ high dollar, high heels ♪
♪ watch me slay ♪
- What's goin' on, guys? - Nothing.
What's goin' on with you?
- Livin' that married life.
[laughter]
Decision day is approaching,
And now that I'm getting to know stacia a lot more,
I definitely wanna know, you know,
Aja's point of view.
I wanna know tameika's point of view.
That way, I can understand stacia dynamically.
You know, the more point of views I have,
The more that I'm gonna understand my wife.
And then I'll know that I put in the work
And I put in the effort.
We have a lot of upside potential.
So, you know, if we do get that divorce,
I'll definitely feel like a failure.
♪ ♪
- How's it going for you? - It's going pretty good.
You know, we have our challenges and everything,
But, you know, we're brand new.
- Like what?
- Yeah, what type of challenges?
- Basically, when she told me about, like--she mentioned
She cheated and everything.
And so that triggered one of my insecurities.
And I was just more so disappointed,
But I also, like, judged her for it.
You know what I'm sayin'? - Mm.
- Like, we've only known each other for five weeks,
You know, so I don't have enough context clues
To, you know, know stacia dynamically.
You know, I only know stacia at age 37
And, you know, a good career, has real estate.
So that's my only baseline.
So when I get a few stories
That aren't really the most positive,
My algorithm kicks in.
And it's more biased now.
- Is it hard to accept her at face value
Because you've known each other for such a short time?
- No, I mean, it's not hard at all.
You know, I accept her for everything, you know.
She's very transparent.
You know, she's very smart, you know, very driven.
But I do see a lot of hurt.
And sometimes, it comes into our relationship
When it comes to, like, trust and stuff.
- Do you think she trusts you?
- She's getting a lot better. She's getting a lot better.
It's just more so... - That's good.
- Getting to know each other and getting to know how--like,
We're learning how to communicate.
But I think for me, I'm a little bit more,
Like, enjoy the process.
You know, I want this to be organic.
And she's like, "I'm all in now."
- Running straight for it. Yeah.
Yeah, she's going to hit first.
- "get to know me now." you know?
- Uh-huh, uh-huh. - She's going straight
To the finish line. - Yeah, yeah.
- "nate, let's go." - yeah, yeah.
[laughter]
- You know, always think of her not like she's taking over,
She's trying to change you into somebody different.
Think of it more as, "I really get to understand
"who this person is,
What created this person, what drives her."
- Okay, okay.
- Give yourself the opportunity
To really just be curious.
- Sure, sure.
- And think of it like her wanting
You to get to that level,
That is speaking to her love language.
So that way, she's gonna feel like, "wow,
"he really loves me because he's really trying
To get on my level."
- And I definitely am.
But, like, this is like a boot camp of, like,
Me being, like, so transparent and vulnerable.
And it's just, like, hyper speed and it's very intense.
And my learning curve is just, like--you know,
It's a challenge for me.
I think her patience is telling me that, you know,
She definitely cares about me.
- Well, with that being said,
Has anyone said the l word yet?
- So stacia has said it to me, like,
"hey, I love you."
I haven't said "I love you" yet.
I expressed to her that basically,
My love for stacia is definitely growing,
And we're getting really, really close.
- If nate doesn't say "I love you" back to stacia,
I know that it's gonna hurt her.
It's definitely going to make her take a step back.
And that's what I'm afraid of.
She'll definitely close down.
And he might not get the best of stacia.
- Like, is there some part of you that is worried
That you won't be able to live up to what you think
Would make her happy?
- Yeah, absolutely.
[dramatic music]
♪ I wanna go deeper with you ♪
♪ oh ♪
- What's up? - Well, well, well.
- How have you been?
- I've been great. I've been good.
- Yeah, so, I mean, how's it been?
It's getting close to decision day.
What's going on?
- I think we're doing good.
You know, we're doing great still.
We have gone through some obstacles, some conflict.
But, you know, I was welcoming it because I wanted to see
How we would get through it.
So we got through it.
We're still very loving towards each other.
- From what we know-- and I talk to nate---
You know, he's happy as hell. You know what I mean?
- Yeah. But, you know, what's crazy
Is that we met with pastor cal yesterday.
And he kept saying, "well, I love this about stacia.
I love this about stacia."
And then he was like,
"so why don't you just say I love you?"
He was like, "well, I've stopped myself many times."
And I feel like if you're stopping yourself
From wanting to say it, why?
- For me personally-- and, like, I've known him
15, 16 years--the only person
I've heard him say "I love you" to
Is his family, his sister, pops.
Like, that's it.
So maybe it's still a wall up
That he's putting there.
- So then you guys haven't seen him
In a serious relationship or in love?
- Not serious. - No.
- Me personally, no.
- It's been a few dates.
Girlfriends in high school, like, that's puppy love.
That's small talk.
- Being a 35-year-old man, never been in love.
He's never experienced this feeling before.
So how will he know if he is?
Yeah, it's a bit surprising.
- No one has ever got to him like you have.
Like, literally, for you to actually, like,
Test his mental, test his love, test his trust,
He's like, "[bleep] like,
I really gotta step up to the plate."
So I feel like that's the only thing that's keeping him back.
Expressing himself to you,
That deeper feeling and that deeper conversation
Is not gonna be natural. - Right.
And why do you think that is?
- I think because there's something
That's behind whatever he's feeling in a person
That he has to know this is it.
You gotta be his front, back, side to side, everything.
So I think when he comes to the realization
That you are that, that's when he's gonna be
More open and receptive to you.
- He just needs more times to, you know--
- Yeah, and I understand that.
And, you know, I try and be patient,
But I don't wanna be in a loveless marriage either.
♪ ♪
I definitely see him opening up more.
But when I'm trying to explain things,
It's like maybe he's receptive, maybe he's defensive.
Or even when, like, the experts are telling him, he's like,
"no, we're not implementing that or I don't like that."
- Because he wants to follow his own path.
Nate is the type of person that if you do give him
All the tools, he's gonna find a different way
To build the house.
- Is he using the tools? - No.
[laughter]
- That's just being real.
- He's been like that
Since we were kids.
- I get he tries.
I get he's stubborn.
I get he's flawed.
I get all of that.
But I feel like if I was to do the same thing,
Where would we be?
So if I'm the constant regulator, how--
- You're like, "how do I balance that?"
- Yeah.
♪ ♪
[upbeat music]
♪ ♪
- Good to see you guys, man.
- Good to see you too.
- All right. - Okay.
- What's up, people?
- Not much. - You look great.
You look glowing. - Thanks.
- And it's not because you're pregnant?
- [laughs] no. - You're not pregnant?
- Not pregnant. - Okay, all right.
- Yeah.
- I know dr. Pia had given you that exercise with the baby.
- I get scared. After that baby experience.
I'm like, "okay, we gotta wait as long as we possibly can."
- We definitely need to prepare better. Yeah.
- The baby kept us up.
We were waking up, like, every two to three hours.
And lack of sleep mixed with, like, the stress...
- Tension, yeah.
- The tension.
He took duty two nights in a row
Because I literally couldn't handle it.
♪ ♪
- Let's talk a little bit about that,
'cause I know that there have been
Challenges handling stress.
And you, miguel, talked about how that's something
You've had to adjust to.
- In all honestly, I'm still adjusting to it.
And the whole, like, being overtly negative, um,
It does affect me.
I'm not gonna lie.
This has been a pattern, right?
It's been a recurring issue.
And so I'm getting to that point that it's like, okay,
We really do need to put in the work to figure this one out
Because it does affect me.
- I didn't know that it was boiling up.
- Well, it's not that it was boi--well, here's the thing.
Like, I wasn't boiling up and I wasn't holding a grudge.
I'm just really seeing a pattern here
That I know is unsustainable for me in the long run.
- Yeah. - And I think
We need to do something to address it.
♪ ♪
- Has he seen the worst in you?
- He's definitely, like, seen intense characteristics of me.
- Okay. - Yeah.
Just that, like, feistiness and the anger
That I have. - He's seen that?
- He's seen it, yeah. - Okay, let's talk levels.
On a level of 1 to 10?
- Good 4.5.
- He's seen a good 4.5?
- Does that scare you?
- A little bit.
- [laughs] - okay.
And how often have you seen yourself at a 10?
- Only, like, twice, like...
- In life? - In life.
- Twice? - Yeah, yeah.
- In nearly 30 years? - Yeah.
- Do you understand where I'm going here?
- Yeah, yeah. - I do. I do. I do.
Right. - That you've seen her norm.
I don't want you to forecast doom
In your relationship. - Mm!
- Because you can easily say, "oh, you haven't seen
The worst of me based on what happened 18 years ago."
- I do do that. He's like...
- What the heck?
- I'm always like, "you just wait.
You're gonna see me real crazy."
[laughing] just kidding. - No, no.
And it scares him. - Yeah.
I know. I'm sorry.
Is that the negativity? Is that negative?
- Well, I think a little bit. - Oh, see, I'm like...
- Yeah, you're primed right-- your go-to
Is to kinda, like, be negative, and it's--yeah.
- And that's so deeply part of me
That, like, I--I don't even-- it doesn't even register.
- The question is, at this point,
Can you live with her norm?
- ♪ got another thing coming ♪
♪ do you got another thing coming? ♪
- ♪ we're forever young ♪
♪ we're forever young ♪
♪ ♪
♪ yeah, you feel it, we're forever young ♪
[line ringing]
♪ ♪
- Hey there. - Hello, rachel.
- How's it going?
- Hello, sister of my wife.
- Hello.
- Well, thanks for taking the time to chat with me.
Krysten and I, we're doing pretty good.
But we are starting to get down to the wire
Of decision day and stuff.
And I'm wondering if maybe you have any insights,
Like, in terms of how she's-- where she might be at overall.
- Okay, well, first, you know, it definitely
Sounds like your expectations going into maybe the process
Weren't exactly met.
So I'm curious, like, how you kind of
Have worked to overcome that, if you have--
Assuming you have. - Yeah, yeah.
Looking back, I feel like it wasn't really about krysten
And it was more about me,
And no matter who walked down the aisle,
A lot of the fears that I had
Just around marriage and commitment
Were gonna come out no matter what.
And so there was just kind of, like,
This initial fight-or-flight reflex
That hit me really hard.
And part of me just wanted to, like, be like,
"oh, my god, I can't believe I did this."
So I think, if anything, I was probably maybe unconsciously
Expecting a girl that was a little bit more,
Like, surfy, kinda hippie.
And once I got over my [bleep], kind of, I was receptive to,
Like, accepting her exactly as the person she is.
- Yeah.
- And realized I have a really great person here.
And she could be even better than
All these things I expected.
And I need to really go all in. You know what I mean?
So that's the solo side for me, at least.
- I will say that krysten is really open-minded.
And I know that she is a lover of the earth,
But maybe not that, like, super hippie vibe.
I'm not trying to, like, preach at you
About krysten or anything.
But I feel like she really deserves someone
That's going to be all in with her.
And if that's you, I think that's amazing.
- Yeah, thank you so much.
Those are really nice things. - No problem.
- So I do have one more question for you that's--
It's definitely more, like, a superficial thing,
But I just would like your advice on it.
- Okay. - Since I have
Kinda spoken out of turn before
And really screwed things up,
I kind of-- I want to avoid doing that.
But at the same time, I would like to address this
In a way that's, like, really not off-putting.
I just want your insight, if you have any.
You know, like I said, I'm a little bit more
Of a natural guy.
I'm a little more earthy. - Yeah.
- And that tends to be more what I'm attracted to.
And in the case of krysten, like,
I really actually think she's beautiful
In her natural state.
So, like, you know, when we're just hanging around at night,
After all the makeup's off, when her hair is, like,
More wavy, like it naturally is,
Like, that's actually when I am most attracted to her,
Which I think is really a good thing and a compliment.
But I'm wondering if she's willing to maybe consider
When we're together, like, not feeling the need
To put on as much makeup
And kind of do herself up quite as much.
- I feel strongly about this topic.
The makeup isn't necessarily for you
Or for the male gaze all the time.
- Yeah, I know. I mean, I know it's not.
- No, wait. I'm not done. - Okay.
- That being said, women, and krysten in this case,
Want to present themselves how they feel best.
And based on, like, how things started out for you guys,
It could, like, inadvertently come across as like,
"oh, yeah, I know we initially spoke about maybe
"me not being attracted to you,
"but how about you, like, have a different haircut
And don't wear makeup now?"
Krysten spent a lot of time feeling insecure
And feeling, "why doesn't mitch like me?
"or why is he kind of telling me
That he's not attracted to me?"
And trying to figure out if you like her.
Krysten deserves someone that cares about her.
I think that's just, like, priority number one.
And my advice to her is for her to figure out
If you are the person for her.
♪ ♪
- No! - Oh!
♪ ♪
- I don't think morgan and I are really on talking terms.
I think--I honestly want the best for her.
I don't care what she thinks about that.
But I wanna show up today because this
Is probably the last time we're all gonna be together.
You know, I've made a lot of good friends
And a lot of good memories.
And I just wanna say my goodbyes.
- ♪ eyes shut ♪
♪ and I'm keeping 'em closed dreaming of ♪
[all cheering]
- [indistinct singing]
[indistinct chatter]
- How have you been?
- [laughing] - okay, that's good.
I'm happy for you.
- Um... - Same?
- Been taking back what I want.
I've been so focused on what someone else wants,
Trying to be what someone else wants.
- Yeah. - And I'm taking it back.
- Love that for you. - Yeah.
- [bleep] love that for you. - Oh, I'm fully on.
- Good.
- Yes. - Mm-hmm.
- But don't worry. I'll have my moment.
On my way here, rachel, my sister,
Was actually telling me that mitch is asking her
For advice on how to ask me
To do my hair less and wear less makeup
And dress down.
And he thought he was gonna get a "hippie girl."
- Mm-hmm.
- Mm, mm, I hear that.
- It's a slow grill, you know?
- Yeah. - Slow burn.
- I just think it's really inconsiderate
To still, how far we've come,
Tell my sister that he wants advice
On how he wants me to look.
I think it's rude. It's very hurtful.
- Don't sleep on the food, guys.
There's food. - Binh, thank you for cooking.
- Anytime. - It's so good.
- Y'all good? Everyone's good?
- It was so good. Yeah. - Thank you for grilling.
- A'ight. But yeah,
So what'd you think of that most recent expert visit?
Like, did you guys--
- Did you guys even have a visit?
- Yeah, we had our decision day,
And tonight's the last night.
- Oh. - Oh.
- Oh, wow.
- With you guys in the process, so...
It's very bittersweet. - Okay.
- Yeah, 'cause I'm gonna miss you guys.
♪ ♪
- How are you feeling, binh?
- Um, yeah, the same way, bittersweet.
I'm gonna miss all you guys.
But I'm trying to figure out my life now.
Today's my last day here.
And maybe even this is it for san diego for me.
Maybe it's on to a new adventure.
Continue therapy.
Just continue to grow and become a better person.
And hopefully, one day, maybe find mrs. Right.
- Do you feel at peace with your decision
And the way things have ended?
- Yeah, I did what was best for me.
Binh is not the partner for me,
And I confidently know that.
And I'm okay with that.
I mean, dr. Pepper has asked the question
If we could ever be friends.
On my end, no,
Because in order to be my friend,
I have to trust you to some extent.
And that trust is no longer there with me.
- Binh, are you willing to be morgan's friend
Or what's your perspective?
- Yeah, I would be.
I wanna do well, for sure.
I want her to let go and forgive.
And for me, I want her to accept the apology,
But that doesn't mean she has to accept me
In her life, you know.
But we all heal on our own time.
So I don't need to be a part of her life.
But for her to completely move on, she needs to forgive me,
Or else it's just gonna be stored inside of her,
And that's not good for her mental health.
So she needs to let it go.
- I think our meeting with pastor cal went really well.
We got a lot of positive feedback.
He's happy with where our marriage is.
And he's happy with where nate is.
Personally, he thinks that he's seen a lot of growth in him.
- That's right. Growth, #growth.
[laughter] let's get it.
I'm in there.
- Okay, okay. - Okay. Sorry.
- Okay, okay.
- So what about you guys, lindy and miguel?
- Yeah, yeah. - Yes, oh, my gosh.
- Things are good.
I don't know. - Yeah.
- There's nothing wrong with that,
Nothing at all.
Say it. Things are good.
Amazing. - Yeah.
- How's mikimby? - Mikimby.
- Mikimby is gone. - Migindy.
- Migindy heather elloway santiago.
- She's outta here. - He's outta here.
- I mean, wait, he.
- We don't know what it identifies as yet.
- Yeah, we don't know their identity, but it was a boy.
- Aww, that's sweet. - It had male--
- You'll figure it out when it's time.
- Yeah. - It had a wiener,
A tiny little baby wiener. - Yeah.
Um, very fitting for the santiagos.
- Stop. [laughter]
- What's fitting for the santiagos?
- Calling yourself out right now.
- Move along. Move along.
[laughter]
- Alexis and justin?
- Um, we talked about intimacy.
The intimacy, it was interesting, I guess.
We just--we're different in that area.
You know, like, she's used to--
And correct me if I'm wrong.
She's used to, you know, I guess,
Somebody being dominant.
And I don't mind being dominant if I know the energy
Is being reciprocated.
- You wanna know that it's welcome in a way?
- Well, not necessarily welcome.
Well, yeah and no, but more so that she's
Feeling the same thing.
- And it's like, yeah, I'll do what I gotta do.
But I think overall, in our relationship,
I need that right now.
Like, I need that dominant energy.
- And I get that.
You know, for me, like, it's just one of those things.
You know what I'm sayin'?
Like, I have to feel comfortable too.
- Are you still in love?
- Of course, you know.
I just--I have mixed feelings, though, you know,
And I gotta be honest with that.
- Are you guys confident going into decision day?
- Um, I don't know yet, you know.
A lot has happened.
And I have to really just kinda sort out everything.
I wanna say yes, but I don't know what's gonna happen.
It's been rough, you know.
But it's also been great too.
- Like, my thing is, if you ever have a question
Whether you have to choose me, choose whatever else,
Because I should be your obvious choice,
Especially as your wife.
And I know that's kind of not fair with this process,
But that's just how I feel.
For me, going into decision day,
I mean, I told you before.
All you asked for is time, patience with me.
And that's what I'm trying to give you,
Decision day or not.
Let's just leave it at that.
[dramatic music]
- So who'd you guys meet with?
- So this week, we met with dr. Pepper for the second time.
I feel like she gets us as individuals and as a couple.
Like, especially, like, some of the sticking points we've had,
I feel like she gets it.
So we met with her again.
And it seems like the theme was, like,
What else is holding either of you back?
Or what else is unanswered or not reconciled?
Because we're getting close to decision day.
- I'm just really glad that you can, like,
See past--'cause I know in the beginning,
You were saying, like, her wearing makeup
And dressing up and things like that bothered you initially.
So I'm really just, like, happy to see that you guys have come
So far, and you didn't let, like, appearances or things
That you thought you would be used to
Or you thought you wanted
Get in the way of your marriage.
- Do you feel like you're over those things?
- Did I say those things in the beginning?
♪ ♪
- Hmm. - Yeah, you said that
In the beginning. - Yeah.
- Okay. - That you took issue
To her dressing up and wearing makeup and stuff.
- I just wanna make sure I'm clear.
You never--
- I never said that.
- You never said that? - Yeah.
- I've personally never heard you say that, but--
- You never-- - I did.
- You never wanted me to be a little more--
- Earthy.
- No, I think I did. Yeah.
- Yeah, okay.
So that is an accurate statement?
- It's valid. I didn't know that, like, it'd gotten around.
I didn't wanna sound like I was, like,
Some controlling husband, 'cause I'm not.
- Oh. No, not at all.
- How do you feel about her now?
Like, where are you at now with her?
- I think I don't know yet.
Yeah.
And I think what, you know, we've talked about,
We did talk a bit about decision day with dr. Pepper.
And one of the things I brought that I wanted to discuss
In that conversation is what decision day meant to me
And what it meant to you, and that maybe we
Hopefully would see eye to eye about it
And be on the same page.
- I'm sorry to pry, but I'm curious.
Have you guys started talking about that?
- I think yes.
And I think that we're both undecided,
To be honest with you.
And I think I wondered
If I could be mitch's wife.
Can I be who he wants me to be?
And then kind of more recently, I've been wondering,
"is mitch who I want?"
And then a big part of me wonders
If I'm okay with someone being unsure about me
After eight weeks.
And I think my need is-- might be something
A little bigger than what can be done in the next two weeks.
[dramatic music]
- Mm-mm.
♪ ♪
- I hear tidbits from you.
I hear tidbits from you.
But I can never walk in your shoes
And understand truly what's going on.
- Hi, everybody. - Oh!
- Oh, my god!
[overlapping shrieks, chatter]
- Hey, what's up?
- We've been listening. And--
- I didn't mean what I said. I'm sorry.
- It's too late. - No.
- One couple has declared it over.
And that saddens us, but we understand.
But four couples are still together.
And confronting the truth is what is hard,
But it's the only way through it to what you need
And what you want and what you hope for.
♪ ♪
- Alexis, as I was listening,
Here's one question I have for you.
Could you make it easier for him
When it comes to that intimacy?
Like, is--like, how does that feel for you?
- Yes. To answer your question, yes.
- And what could you do?
- He came to me this morning.
He said, "can I get some help?"
You know, like, "I'm uncomfortable with it."
And I said yes. - Thank you.
- Yes. - That's good.
- I said yes. I answered. I said, "yes, I can do that.
"but can you try a little bit more?
"'cause it's only been one night that you're
Trying to speak yourself into this confidence."
And I felt like it could help in other areas.
- Sure.
Justin, life is asking you to step up.
You don't have to do it with alexis,
But it's gonna come back.
This area right here, it's gonna show up
In every other area of your life.
It's not just what's happening in the bed.
This is just a metaphor for your life.
And so your wife is saying, "hey, I will help.
"I'm gonna lean in.
I'm gonna make it easier for you."
But I don't want you to ease back
When it gets uncomfortable.
I want you in those moments to say, "justin, you the man."
- I'm confident in that area in intimacy.
But there's some stuff I just-- I've never done
Because I'm so used to it being equal.
- But you've never gotten married to a stranger before.
There's a lot of things on this process you've never done.
I'm just asking you to try it.
- Every time you get uncomfortable,
That may just be a trigger for you to step in
Instead of stepping back.
- Just try it, baby.
- I'ma come at that thing like a tasmanian devil
With teeth and all and just rip it off.
- [laughs]
- All right, so, krysten and mitch,
Did something happen?
- Um, I guess based off of
Your--your one-on-one with my sister,
Do you think that you are over your initial hurdles
Of your attraction to me?
Based off my conversation with her, I learned,
Surprisingly, myself that maybe you weren't.
[tense music]
And I guess it kinda sent me backwards.
- So the initial rejection was something very tough.
- Of course.
- You had a lot to get over.
Everybody wants to feel desirable
And wanted by their life partner.
- Yeah. - And I thought
In our conversation, you had experienced a big change
And found her very attractive and really liked, you know,
Who she was and how she looked.
What did you say that was different from then?
- Um...
I mean, it seems like-- I don't know,
I'm just gonna go based off what I was picking up tonight.
But I think the last thing that I told rachel, your sister,
Was like, "I wouldn't mind your input on one thing.
"I am most attracted to my wife
More when she has--when she's just actually more natural."
That's what I said.
- So in some ways, that's a very big compliment.
That's, like, without hair, without makeup, whatever,
He thinks you're beautiful.
Do you think she's beautiful then?
- I do.
- Are you very attracted to her?
- Um, I'm attracted to her.
♪ ♪
- She's gonna hear that the way I'm hearing that.
- Yeah, the way I'm hearing it too.
- Well, you're putting me on the spot
In front of everyone. - I'm sorry. I--
- I mean, is that, like-- was that the way to do this?
I mean-- - it sounded to me like
You were very attracted to her,
At least under those circumstances.
But I wouldn't have said it if I wasn't expecting
An affirmative answer.
I thought your attraction had really grown,
Or I wouldn't have asked.
If that's not true, I'm sorry I asked.
- I am attracted to her.
It sounds like you know the conversation already.
So, I mean, there's no point in--
- There really is--
Mitch, there is no secret conversation.
This literally just happened.
I spoke to her before we got here.
And I was shocked that she said that you brought up
That you were expecting a "hippie girl"
To walk down the aisle.
And then you said, "I need your advice.
"how can I get krysten to dress down
And wear less makeup and wear her hair natural?"
So she said that to me right before we got here.
♪ ♪
- So I--just watching you,
I could just tell you were angry and unhappy.
I could tell by your body language.
- Yeah, this is very embarrassing, dr. Pepper.
This is very hard.
What woman would sit here and say
This is not embarrassing?
This is horrible.
This was a moment to get to know me
Through my best friend and my sister.
And you took it as a chance to ask for advice
On how to get me to change,
Share why I wasn't the girl you thought I would be.
You took that opportunity to do that.
And it really upset me.
And I--what?
He's going to talk his way out of this again,
Say something really nice that makes sense?
What about action?
- Listen, I think that none of us
Wanna see you unhappy or embarrassed.
And I think this is something we can support you in.
I think it's a conversation you can get through.
I think your husband cares a great deal for you.
And I do think he finds you attractive.
And I think that if you talk this over,
You'll find that there's enough attraction and--
- I'm--I'm gonna stop you right there, dr. Pepper.
[dramatic music]
I really, really respect you guys.
I do. And I am, like,
A huge advocate of the experience.
But I am not going to accept
He is attracted to me enough.
I am not going to accept
That he has come far in this journey.
I am tired of accepting his triumph
Over eight weeks of needing professional help
To get there.
He has made me be so confused about myself.
And I came in a full woman, a confident woman,
Who was so excited about life
And to be a part of you guys and this experience.
I want somebody who is excited that I've walked into the room.
And I want somebody who thinks that I'm beautiful
With a little bit of makeup on.
And I'm done.
♪ ♪
I'm done.
♪ ♪
- Ugh, I'm sorry.
- I don't--I don't need an apology from you guys.
I need apology from him.
♪ ♪
- I--I don't even really know.
I mean, it's like...
This is all so blindsiding to me.
- Oh, my god!
Is this blindsiding to anybody?
♪ ♪
- That [bleep] don't know what he wants.
- Yeah. - I just feel like mitch
Doesn't truly know what he wants.
- I don't think nobody should be halfway attracted to you,
Let alone your husband. - Exactly. I agree.
I agree. - I don't never think--
If you ever was like, "babe, I'm fine."
But somebody asked you how you feel about your wife
And you was like, "eh, she cool."
Absolutely not. Forget it.
- He sounds like he needs
A hippie from boulder, colorado.
- He needs somebody with dirty feet.
- Dirty feet. Yup! [laughs]
- I hope you'll have a better talk later
Between you two. - Yeah.
- From the start of this marriage,
I've not-- I have not been trying
To force my will on krysten.
I've not been trying to change the person she is.
I've been trying to accept the person she is.
So, I mean, the way this has all happened
Is just really regrettable for me.
- Every one of you, and I'm looking at all of your eyes,
Every one of you, when we married you, when we stood up,
Interviewed, and you-- everybody had the same story.
"I want to be married.
And I wanna do whatever I can to make this work."
Here it is.
♪ ♪
Next time on "married at first sight"...
- Vibrating panties.
- ♪ I thought we were tighter than that ♪
- All right, let's do it.
- With decision day less than two weeks away,
All couples are headed out on a weekend couples retreat,
Where they can reconnect and reflect
On their marriages.
- Get in there, yo.
- ♪ I thought we were tighter than that ♪
- Hey, beautiful.
You look like a goddess right now.
- They had sex.
- For real? - Yeah.
- This category is most likely to end up
With multiple divorces.
That's me, baby! It's me!
[dramatic music]
- There's this anger inside of you that just like--
That [bleep] doesn't fly ever.
- You don't wanna see a blow-up.
He cannot handle my outbursts.
[laughing] - I just wanted to clear up--
- [screams]
I'm gonna go [bleep] crazy.
♪ ♪