1 00:00:02,000 --> 00:00:07,000 Downloaded from YTS.MX 2 00:00:08,000 --> 00:00:13,000 Official YIFY movies site: YTS.MX 3 00:00:15,479 --> 00:00:19,441 " I lived in a house " 4 00:00:19,733 --> 00:00:22,194 " up on a hill " 5 00:00:22,486 --> 00:00:26,615 " had it before I knew you " 6 00:00:26,907 --> 00:00:30,327 " you came to me slowly " 7 00:00:30,619 --> 00:00:32,788 " you gave yourself holy " 8 00:00:33,080 --> 00:00:35,916 " you loved me completely " 9 00:00:36,208 --> 00:00:37,960 " what a luxury... " 10 00:00:38,252 --> 00:00:39,503 I'll be right back. 11 00:00:48,011 --> 00:00:52,975 Adam Mitchell, 12 00:00:53,267 --> 00:00:56,937 I think of you fondly. 13 00:00:58,689 --> 00:01:00,315 No, that's stupid. Um... 14 00:01:04,861 --> 00:01:06,071 I love you. 15 00:01:08,365 --> 00:01:10,325 I've always loved you. 16 00:01:15,539 --> 00:01:18,959 "You look beautiful, Cassie." 17 00:01:19,251 --> 00:01:20,586 I don't know what's happening. 18 00:01:20,877 --> 00:01:23,589 This is the only thing 19 00:01:23,880 --> 00:01:25,966 that you should be wearing right now. 20 00:01:29,261 --> 00:01:31,013 Chester, have you seen Cassie? 21 00:01:31,305 --> 00:01:35,183 - Um... -Are you moist? 22 00:01:36,685 --> 00:01:38,228 It's supposed to help. 23 00:01:38,520 --> 00:01:42,899 I don't I think so. 24 00:01:43,191 --> 00:01:46,987 Good enough. Okay, just let's get 25 00:01:47,279 --> 00:01:48,697 I can't get it in. 26 00:01:48,989 --> 00:01:52,701 It's kind of, um, squishy. 27 00:01:52,993 --> 00:01:55,203 Are you sure you're ready? 28 00:01:55,495 --> 00:01:56,997 Yeah. 29 00:01:57,289 --> 00:01:58,874 I was born ready. 30 00:01:59,166 --> 00:02:01,501 Hey. Hey, Adam. 31 00:02:01,793 --> 00:02:03,462 Adam, it's okay. 32 00:02:03,754 --> 00:02:05,964 It's a lot of pressure. 33 00:02:06,256 --> 00:02:08,800 Hey. Hey, Adam, 34 00:02:09,092 --> 00:02:11,386 Adam, it's okay. 35 00:02:11,678 --> 00:02:14,973 It's just us. 36 00:02:15,265 --> 00:02:16,433 I... 37 00:02:19,770 --> 00:02:22,606 - I -I need to pee. 38 00:02:22,898 --> 00:02:23,607 Maybe. 39 00:02:29,571 --> 00:02:32,449 We could always try again later. 40 00:02:34,701 --> 00:02:36,119 Adam? 41 00:02:36,411 --> 00:02:38,038 [Girl] Are you freaking kidding me? 42 00:02:40,290 --> 00:02:42,626 Get out of my parent's bed, you tramp! 43 00:02:46,088 --> 00:02:47,214 Uh, Adam? 44 00:02:47,506 --> 00:02:50,258 Adam, my clothes are in there. 45 00:02:50,550 --> 00:02:52,260 Adam. Adam, please. 46 00:02:52,552 --> 00:02:54,221 Get out of my house before I call the police. 47 00:02:54,513 --> 00:02:56,556 - For what? -For stuff. 48 00:02:56,848 --> 00:02:58,850 I don't know. Whore. 49 00:03:00,185 --> 00:03:03,397 -[Laughter] -What a whore! 50 00:03:03,689 --> 00:03:05,065 Where are you going, slut? 51 00:03:06,566 --> 00:03:08,485 -[Laughter] -What are you doing? 52 00:03:08,777 --> 00:03:12,072 Come on, the party just started. Stay awhile. 53 00:03:16,618 --> 00:03:17,786 - Um... -Oh, my god. 54 00:03:18,078 --> 00:03:19,663 What a little tramp. 55 00:03:21,873 --> 00:03:23,291 Bye! 56 00:03:26,712 --> 00:03:27,504 [Sighs] 57 00:03:30,507 --> 00:03:32,175 Hey. 58 00:03:32,467 --> 00:03:34,177 Cassie Cranston, is that you? 59 00:03:34,469 --> 00:03:36,680 - Shit! -Did you just say "shit"? 60 00:03:44,479 --> 00:03:46,523 [Gasps] Jesus, Seth. 61 00:03:46,815 --> 00:03:48,984 - That's my mom's. -I'll bring it back. 62 00:03:49,276 --> 00:03:50,944 Okay. 63 00:03:55,991 --> 00:03:57,993 [Woman] Lana Parker called me about you, 64 00:03:58,285 --> 00:04:02,164 said you streaked through her backyard. 65 00:04:02,456 --> 00:04:03,874 And she wasn’t the only one. 66 00:04:04,166 --> 00:04:05,667 All of beaver's Ridge is abuzz about you. 67 00:04:05,959 --> 00:04:07,794 It was so horrible, mom. They all 68 00:04:08,086 --> 00:04:10,964 don't say another word. 69 00:04:11,256 --> 00:04:13,049 You embarrassed me tonight. 70 00:04:13,341 --> 00:04:15,427 You embarrassed yourself. 71 00:04:15,719 --> 00:04:16,845 Please, mom, I'm 72 00:04:17,137 --> 00:04:18,972 don't you care what others think of you? 73 00:04:22,100 --> 00:04:24,144 Don't you? 74 00:04:24,436 --> 00:04:25,562 Oh, stop sulking. 75 00:04:25,854 --> 00:04:27,898 Go in the house before anyone sees you. 76 00:04:28,190 --> 00:04:30,442 Unless you can think of another way you can mortify me tonight. 77 00:04:57,719 --> 00:04:58,845 Fuck, yeah. 78 00:05:09,147 --> 00:05:10,106 [Phone vibrating] 79 00:05:21,159 --> 00:05:22,077 Hey, Ellie. 80 00:05:22,369 --> 00:05:23,870 Sorry I missed all your calls. 81 00:05:24,162 --> 00:05:25,872 I have your pages, I just, um 82 00:05:26,164 --> 00:05:29,042 Cassie, uh, it's your mom. 83 00:05:29,334 --> 00:05:32,420 - Oh, Christ, what now? -She passed. 84 00:05:32,712 --> 00:05:34,339 Well, good. I didn't want her writing the forward, anyway. 85 00:05:34,631 --> 00:05:36,675 - That was your idea. -No, um, 86 00:05:36,967 --> 00:05:37,926 she's gone. 87 00:05:40,011 --> 00:05:41,012 On tour? 88 00:05:42,931 --> 00:05:46,142 No. I'm sorry, Cassie. 89 00:05:46,434 --> 00:05:47,686 I know the two of you weren’t very close, 90 00:05:47,978 --> 00:05:49,479 but, um, look, 91 00:05:49,771 --> 00:05:53,733 I, uh, still need that manuscript from you 92 00:05:54,025 --> 00:05:55,235 as soon as possible. 93 00:05:55,527 --> 00:05:57,320 But, um, 94 00:05:57,612 --> 00:05:59,739 you know, take a few days. 95 00:06:01,658 --> 00:06:03,285 Go home. 96 00:06:03,577 --> 00:06:06,329 [Music playing] 97 00:06:30,312 --> 00:06:33,106 " I woke up in a fervor " 98 00:06:33,398 --> 00:06:36,234 " asleep with the lights again " 99 00:06:36,526 --> 00:06:39,112 " outside too dark to see shadows " 100 00:06:39,404 --> 00:06:42,157 " but I could still hear them " 101 00:06:42,449 --> 00:06:45,535 " and you asked me what was the matter " 102 00:06:45,827 --> 00:06:48,955 " I said, "it's time to go outside" " 103 00:06:49,247 --> 00:06:52,042 " I hear ghosts passing over " 104 00:06:52,334 --> 00:06:54,711 " you said, "baby, we better walk" " 105 00:07:20,987 --> 00:07:22,781 Afternoon, Adam. How are you doing? 106 00:07:23,073 --> 00:07:24,908 - Good, good. -You're looking very good. Looking fit. 107 00:07:25,200 --> 00:07:27,243 I just want to talk to you about the apple butter festival this year. 108 00:07:27,535 --> 00:07:28,995 - Yeah. -'Cause last year the judging got some complaints. 109 00:07:29,287 --> 00:07:30,288 - Yeah. -Are you in this year? 110 00:07:30,580 --> 00:07:31,957 - Absolutely. 'Cause you'd make a great judge. 111 00:07:32,248 --> 00:07:34,125 - You love apple butter, don’t you? -I love apple butter. 112 00:07:36,544 --> 00:07:40,173 Oh, you've gotta be fucking kidding me. 113 00:07:40,465 --> 00:07:41,591 [Woman] If you're here for the tour, 114 00:07:41,883 --> 00:07:42,801 Justin's taking one out now. 115 00:07:43,093 --> 00:07:44,386 Yeah. Uh, Mr. Thicodedious, 116 00:07:44,678 --> 00:07:46,054 have you got your Insulin this time? 117 00:07:46,346 --> 00:07:48,974 All right, now, for our first stop, everybody, 118 00:07:49,265 --> 00:07:51,559 it's gonna be the church that inspired 119 00:07:51,851 --> 00:07:55,188 the exciting conclusion to the fifth Victoria novel... 120 00:07:55,480 --> 00:07:56,398 [Sighs] 121 00:07:56,690 --> 00:07:57,691 I'm not here for the tour. 122 00:07:57,983 --> 00:08:01,361 I just wanted to check the place out. 123 00:08:01,653 --> 00:08:03,655 It's cool. 124 00:08:03,947 --> 00:08:06,908 Holy fuck. You're Cassie Cranston. 125 00:08:07,200 --> 00:08:11,037 I'm I'm literally reading your column right now. 126 00:08:11,329 --> 00:08:15,333 - It's like my Bible. -Thank you. 127 00:08:15,625 --> 00:08:16,668 That's a good one. 128 00:08:16,960 --> 00:08:18,962 How's that working out for you? 129 00:08:19,254 --> 00:08:20,338 Oh, it's yeah. 130 00:08:20,630 --> 00:08:22,090 No, it's like not really. It's fine. 131 00:08:22,382 --> 00:08:23,842 - Oh. -I'm sorry, I just 132 00:08:24,134 --> 00:08:25,844 I never thought that I would get to meet you. 133 00:08:26,136 --> 00:08:27,971 I saw you the night 134 00:08:28,263 --> 00:08:29,889 that you went through town 135 00:08:30,181 --> 00:08:32,434 with with your tits and stuff and it just 136 00:08:32,726 --> 00:08:33,852 [blows raspberry] 137 00:08:34,144 --> 00:08:36,354 It blew my mind, and, uh, and every time, 138 00:08:36,646 --> 00:08:38,690 I just get fed up with this place, I read your first article 139 00:08:38,982 --> 00:08:40,608 that you ever wrote the one that made people hate you, 140 00:08:40,900 --> 00:08:42,610 and, like, it's so comforting to me. 141 00:08:42,902 --> 00:08:45,613 "Dear beaver's Ridge, the following article has been formatted 142 00:08:45,905 --> 00:08:47,699 to fit your narrow and oppressed view of the universe." 143 00:08:47,991 --> 00:08:49,951 It is a great opening line. It's so epic. 144 00:08:50,243 --> 00:08:51,911 Thank you. 145 00:08:52,203 --> 00:08:53,788 What are you doing here? 146 00:08:54,080 --> 00:08:57,083 Well, my mom died, so... 147 00:08:57,375 --> 00:08:58,793 Fuck and shit. 148 00:08:59,085 --> 00:09:01,671 Hey, you wouldn't happen to know 149 00:09:01,963 --> 00:09:04,174 who the wills and estates lawyer is? 150 00:09:04,466 --> 00:09:07,010 I do. Um, yes. 151 00:09:09,971 --> 00:09:11,639 - Thank you. -Yeah. 152 00:09:11,931 --> 00:09:13,224 Oh, god. 153 00:09:15,268 --> 00:09:17,228 Nice to meet you. Thank you so much. 154 00:09:17,520 --> 00:09:18,855 Bye. 155 00:09:22,192 --> 00:09:22,984 Fuck. 156 00:09:37,123 --> 00:09:38,166 Why can't we show it today? 157 00:09:38,458 --> 00:09:39,626 Well, the town's national treasure died. 158 00:09:39,918 --> 00:09:41,086 People are super sad and stuff. 159 00:09:41,377 --> 00:09:43,463 No one wants to buy a house when they're sad. 160 00:09:46,508 --> 00:09:48,676 It's listed too high. 161 00:09:48,968 --> 00:09:50,386 In the city, we'd list it 25 percent lower. 162 00:09:50,678 --> 00:09:51,721 It starts a bidding war. 163 00:09:52,013 --> 00:09:53,264 No. See? There's no bidding wars here. 164 00:09:53,556 --> 00:09:55,600 What you do is, you go 25 percent higher, 165 00:09:55,892 --> 00:09:57,769 and then people think they’re getting a bargain 166 00:09:58,061 --> 00:09:59,771 when they Jew us down. 167 00:10:03,274 --> 00:10:04,400 I'm Jewish. 168 00:10:07,737 --> 00:10:09,823 - I'm sorry. -Don't apologize. 169 00:10:10,115 --> 00:10:12,492 Just don't say that in front of clients, 170 00:10:12,784 --> 00:10:14,494 unless small-town bigotry is something that... 171 00:10:14,786 --> 00:10:16,204 Binds the town together. 172 00:10:16,496 --> 00:10:18,456 Kind of. 173 00:10:18,748 --> 00:10:20,708 Although we do have a major that's a Paki. 174 00:10:21,000 --> 00:10:22,836 So, or Paki... he's a Paki Pakistan. 175 00:10:23,128 --> 00:10:24,337 Pakistan Pakistani. 176 00:10:24,629 --> 00:10:27,006 Is that what you call those people? 177 00:10:27,298 --> 00:10:28,383 Look, the main selling point 178 00:10:28,675 --> 00:10:30,093 of all the homes in beaver's Ridge, 179 00:10:30,385 --> 00:10:33,471 is that you're coming to a community, you know? 180 00:10:33,763 --> 00:10:35,181 It's wholesome, 181 00:10:35,473 --> 00:10:36,850 those family values. 182 00:10:37,142 --> 00:10:39,185 You know, the kind of place maybe you could see yourself 183 00:10:39,477 --> 00:10:42,939 setting up your own little family. 184 00:10:43,231 --> 00:10:44,899 - Are you fucking shitting me? -[Grunting] 185 00:10:45,191 --> 00:10:46,609 [Woman] Oh, hey, Bruce. 186 00:10:48,653 --> 00:10:49,904 Hey, buddy. 187 00:10:50,196 --> 00:10:52,198 I told you I was bringing my new partner by today! 188 00:10:52,490 --> 00:10:54,159 Was that today? What time 189 00:10:54,450 --> 00:10:56,161 oh, I'm sorry that slipped my mind. 190 00:10:56,452 --> 00:10:59,497 So you're the home owners? 191 00:10:59,789 --> 00:11:02,709 - This is my wife. -Nah, uh, hah, ex-wife. 192 00:11:03,001 --> 00:11:04,711 Temporary separation, Alice. 193 00:11:05,003 --> 00:11:06,880 Until you get off your ass and sign the papers. 194 00:11:07,172 --> 00:11:09,340 - This is my house! -Oh, my goodness. 195 00:11:09,632 --> 00:11:11,718 It's not. It's my house. 196 00:11:12,010 --> 00:11:14,637 Why don’t you get your shit out of it? 197 00:11:22,979 --> 00:11:25,273 [Woman] I will rip the batteries out of that game thing 198 00:11:25,565 --> 00:11:26,608 so fast, your head is gonna spin. 199 00:11:26,900 --> 00:11:28,735 Stop treating me like a child, mom. 200 00:11:29,027 --> 00:11:30,361 Take this casserole over to Maureen's. 201 00:11:30,653 --> 00:11:32,614 - No one's even there. -If that little tramp 202 00:11:32,906 --> 00:11:36,034 daughter of hers turns up, she'll need food. 203 00:11:36,326 --> 00:11:39,579 - Did you make me one of these? -[Man] This is the house 204 00:11:39,871 --> 00:11:42,165 where Maureen wrote every single one of the books. 205 00:11:42,457 --> 00:11:43,583 Okay, now it's also 206 00:11:43,875 --> 00:11:47,045 the inspiration for Victoria's childhood home. 207 00:11:47,337 --> 00:11:48,671 And this tree right here, folks, 208 00:11:48,963 --> 00:11:52,467 this is the tree where Victoria had her first kiss. 209 00:11:52,759 --> 00:11:56,804 Also, the tree where Mr. Cobell proposed marriage. 210 00:11:59,515 --> 00:12:01,267 - Sorry about your mom. -[Gasps] 211 00:12:01,559 --> 00:12:04,437 [Tour guide] Go ahead and take some photos if you want. 212 00:12:04,729 --> 00:12:06,439 Thanks, Seth. 213 00:12:10,526 --> 00:12:13,029 Do you play father-daughter warfare? 214 00:12:13,321 --> 00:12:14,739 I have no idea what that is. 215 00:12:15,031 --> 00:12:16,241 [Sighs] 216 00:12:16,532 --> 00:12:20,161 [Music playing] 217 00:13:14,007 --> 00:13:16,718 Ovulation begins in t-minus five days. 218 00:13:17,010 --> 00:13:18,886 Now, I've given your secretary the itinerary, 219 00:13:19,178 --> 00:13:20,013 and she's freed your schedule 220 00:13:20,305 --> 00:13:21,347 for the corresponding times. 221 00:13:21,639 --> 00:13:22,849 Those are non-negotiable. 222 00:13:23,141 --> 00:13:24,475 3:00 P.M. means 3:00 P.M. 223 00:13:24,767 --> 00:13:25,560 Not quarter after. 224 00:13:25,852 --> 00:13:27,270 I'm sorry I was late today. 225 00:13:27,562 --> 00:13:29,105 Now, when you walk in that door, I want you to be fully aroused. 226 00:13:29,397 --> 00:13:30,940 Okay, sweetheart? 227 00:13:31,232 --> 00:13:33,192 Fully aroused, yeah. 228 00:13:33,484 --> 00:13:34,777 This is fun, huh? 229 00:13:35,069 --> 00:13:37,071 - Sweetie, this isn't for enjoyment. -Right. 230 00:13:37,363 --> 00:13:39,657 You know, the doctor said that we need to keep a steady flow of semen going 231 00:13:39,949 --> 00:13:41,701 to maximize our chances for when the time comes. 232 00:13:41,993 --> 00:13:44,662 We don't want to be the only 30-year-olds in town without a child, do we? 233 00:13:44,954 --> 00:13:46,372 Uh-uh. 234 00:13:46,664 --> 00:13:47,832 We just need to keep the semen schedule. Okay? 235 00:13:48,124 --> 00:13:49,959 - All right. -[Telephone rings] 236 00:13:52,420 --> 00:13:53,629 Adam, we need to finish. 237 00:13:53,921 --> 00:13:55,214 That's my work ring though. 238 00:13:55,506 --> 00:13:56,549 -[Grunts] -Oh! God, Connie! 239 00:13:56,841 --> 00:13:58,134 Oh, my god. 240 00:13:58,426 --> 00:14:00,720 Can I just answer it real quick, and I'll get back to you? 241 00:14:01,012 --> 00:14:02,055 [Grunts] [Sighs] 242 00:14:02,347 --> 00:14:03,890 [Gasps] Okay. 243 00:14:07,935 --> 00:14:09,187 Adam Mitchell. 244 00:14:09,479 --> 00:14:10,855 Hi. 245 00:14:11,147 --> 00:14:14,776 Uh... it's Cassie Cranston. 246 00:14:15,068 --> 00:14:16,235 Uh, uh, hi. 247 00:14:16,527 --> 00:14:18,738 So, you're a lawyer. 248 00:14:19,030 --> 00:14:22,241 Um uh, honey, it's um, it's it's super dry. 249 00:14:28,998 --> 00:14:30,625 Um, wills and estates, mostly, yeah. 250 00:14:30,917 --> 00:14:33,002 When did you get back into town? 251 00:14:33,294 --> 00:14:35,630 Just now. 252 00:14:35,922 --> 00:14:38,800 - The library's gone, huh? -Yeah, yeah. 253 00:14:39,092 --> 00:14:40,927 It burned to the ground about eight years ago. 254 00:14:41,219 --> 00:14:42,845 It was a huge fire. It was a terrible tragedy. 255 00:14:43,137 --> 00:14:46,474 Those poor schoolchildren with nothing to do with their free time. 256 00:14:48,518 --> 00:14:50,728 Uh, right. So, 257 00:14:51,020 --> 00:14:52,772 I need to plan the funeral. 258 00:14:53,064 --> 00:14:54,232 Oh, I did that already. 259 00:14:54,524 --> 00:14:56,150 I did it all by myself. Oh, god 260 00:14:56,442 --> 00:14:57,777 [grunting] 261 00:15:01,239 --> 00:15:03,950 [Moaning] 262 00:15:08,788 --> 00:15:09,956 Sorry, where were we? 263 00:15:10,248 --> 00:15:12,875 - Everything okay over there? -Yeah. 264 00:15:13,167 --> 00:15:16,504 I'm, uh I'm I'm glad you're in town. 265 00:15:16,796 --> 00:15:18,589 Why? 266 00:15:18,881 --> 00:15:20,133 Well, you know, you're next of kin, 267 00:15:20,425 --> 00:15:22,468 you got to sign the, uh, documents relevant documents, 268 00:15:22,760 --> 00:15:24,595 there's all sorts of stuff, and, uh, 269 00:15:24,887 --> 00:15:27,849 I mean, I just always kind of assumed you would never be coming home. 270 00:15:29,517 --> 00:15:31,102 [Scoffs] Well, my mom died. 271 00:15:31,394 --> 00:15:32,520 I mean, why wouldn't I come home? 272 00:15:32,812 --> 00:15:35,773 -'Cause of the article? -Yeah, right, of course. 273 00:15:36,065 --> 00:15:38,860 So, when do we read the will? 274 00:15:39,152 --> 00:15:40,278 After the funeral. 275 00:15:40,570 --> 00:15:41,571 Right. 276 00:15:43,739 --> 00:15:46,409 Okay, well I've bothered you after business hours, 277 00:15:46,701 --> 00:15:48,953 so, I'll let you get back to your wife. 278 00:15:49,245 --> 00:15:52,165 - I assume you're married. -Oh, yeah, actually. 279 00:15:53,708 --> 00:15:56,127 Okay, uh, well, uh, thanks for everything. 280 00:15:56,419 --> 00:15:57,712 You actually know my Wi 281 00:15:59,005 --> 00:16:00,798 -[exhales] -Sweetie, we talk about 282 00:16:01,090 --> 00:16:04,635 you warning me before you release your demons. 283 00:16:04,927 --> 00:16:08,264 That face you make it's like staring into the sun. 284 00:16:09,515 --> 00:16:10,808 A lot of that is involuntary. 285 00:16:12,643 --> 00:16:14,812 [Doorbell rings] 286 00:16:24,113 --> 00:16:25,490 You didn't call. 287 00:16:27,742 --> 00:16:28,868 What was I supposed to say? 288 00:16:29,160 --> 00:16:32,455 [Thunder rumbles] 289 00:16:32,747 --> 00:16:34,665 You will now have a passage 290 00:16:34,957 --> 00:16:38,336 from Maureen's first Victoria book read by Heather Mitchell, 291 00:16:38,628 --> 00:16:43,007 president of the Victoria of the true north festival committee. 292 00:16:44,550 --> 00:16:46,093 [Clears throat] 293 00:16:46,385 --> 00:16:49,263 "Victoria had always been aware, 294 00:16:49,555 --> 00:16:51,474 ever since her first memories, 295 00:16:51,766 --> 00:16:55,770 that she was very near to a world of deviant morality. 296 00:16:57,980 --> 00:17:02,193 But sometimes, just for a moment, 297 00:17:02,485 --> 00:17:05,488 her loved ones neared it, and she caught a glimpse, 298 00:17:05,780 --> 00:17:08,157 of the bewitching world beyond, 299 00:17:08,449 --> 00:17:11,160 and she knew that it would be her life's work... 300 00:17:11,452 --> 00:17:12,411 [Sighs] 301 00:17:12,703 --> 00:17:14,830 To keep herself and others from it." 302 00:17:15,122 --> 00:17:16,290 [Cries] 303 00:17:16,582 --> 00:17:17,500 [Sighs heavily] 304 00:17:17,792 --> 00:17:19,710 I hate everything. 305 00:17:23,673 --> 00:17:26,425 Remember when you left me here alone with all of these people? 306 00:17:26,717 --> 00:17:29,136 The sooner I get out of here, the better. 307 00:17:29,428 --> 00:17:32,557 - She just had to show up today. -Oh, my god. 308 00:17:32,848 --> 00:17:35,017 - It's her mother's funeral. -Oh, button it. 309 00:17:35,309 --> 00:17:37,895 - I'm gonna go give her a peace of my mind. -Honey, don't 310 00:17:38,187 --> 00:17:41,148 is this really the best place for a confrontation like this? 311 00:17:42,483 --> 00:17:44,902 Cassie Cranston. 312 00:17:45,194 --> 00:17:46,821 Heather Murray. 313 00:17:47,113 --> 00:17:49,073 Or, is it Mitchell now? 314 00:17:49,365 --> 00:17:51,742 On behalf of beaver's Ridge welcoming committee, 315 00:17:52,034 --> 00:17:53,452 I would like to formally let you know 316 00:17:53,744 --> 00:17:55,621 that you are not welcome. 317 00:17:55,913 --> 00:17:57,873 That is, you are not welcome here. 318 00:17:58,165 --> 00:17:59,292 Wow. 319 00:17:59,584 --> 00:18:01,961 As far as condolences go, that was original. 320 00:18:02,253 --> 00:18:03,296 Did I go something? 321 00:18:03,588 --> 00:18:05,923 You did something to this entire town. 322 00:18:06,215 --> 00:18:08,801 Right, the article. Is that it? 323 00:18:09,093 --> 00:18:11,387 You may have grown up here, but you know nothing about us. 324 00:18:11,679 --> 00:18:16,225 I mean, we get up to some pretty wild shenanigans. 325 00:18:16,517 --> 00:18:19,020 [Cassie] Like what? 326 00:18:19,312 --> 00:18:20,771 The true north festival? 327 00:18:21,063 --> 00:18:22,607 - The apple butter parade? -[Chuckles] 328 00:18:22,898 --> 00:18:24,025 Hey, I don't mean to butt in here, 329 00:18:24,317 --> 00:18:25,610 but I will not stand idly by, 330 00:18:25,901 --> 00:18:28,487 while you trash talk the apple butter parade. 331 00:18:28,779 --> 00:18:30,197 Bruce, everybody, can we just please give Cassie a break? 332 00:18:30,489 --> 00:18:32,992 Whose side are you on, really, Adam? 333 00:18:33,284 --> 00:18:36,037 [Heather] Wipe that smile off your face. 334 00:18:36,329 --> 00:18:38,748 You think you're the only one who's had a little excitement? 335 00:18:39,040 --> 00:18:41,334 Well, let me tell you, I have had my share 336 00:18:41,626 --> 00:18:43,961 - of excitement. -Okay. Do tell. 337 00:18:45,671 --> 00:18:48,299 I slept with a black man in college. 338 00:18:48,591 --> 00:18:50,551 My stars. 339 00:18:50,843 --> 00:18:51,927 Ever been with a woman? 340 00:18:53,554 --> 00:18:55,473 I kissed a girl once, I didn't care for it. 341 00:18:55,765 --> 00:18:57,016 Sex tape? 342 00:18:57,308 --> 00:18:59,310 We make them, and watch them often. Big whoop. 343 00:18:59,602 --> 00:19:01,437 Anything else? 344 00:19:01,729 --> 00:19:03,397 Have you ever been in an orgy? 345 00:19:03,689 --> 00:19:06,150 -[Gasps] -[Laughs] 346 00:19:06,442 --> 00:19:07,360 I'm sorry. 347 00:19:14,033 --> 00:19:15,201 Hey, you know, hon', 348 00:19:15,493 --> 00:19:17,119 it's been kind of a rough day, 349 00:19:17,411 --> 00:19:18,704 we've got a little time before dinner, 350 00:19:18,996 --> 00:19:21,832 maybe we could, uh, you know... 351 00:19:22,124 --> 00:19:24,710 - I'm not ovulating. -Yeah, I know, I know. 352 00:19:25,002 --> 00:19:27,838 I just thought maybe we could, uh, have a little fun. 353 00:19:28,130 --> 00:19:30,591 Oh, sweetie [chuckles] 354 00:19:30,883 --> 00:19:32,843 No. Fun time was yesterday 355 00:19:33,135 --> 00:19:35,638 just just like the schedule says, remember? 356 00:19:35,930 --> 00:19:38,557 You just have to keep your your sperm fresh. 357 00:19:38,849 --> 00:19:39,975 You don't need me for that. 358 00:19:40,267 --> 00:19:43,187 Besides, it it really turns me on 359 00:19:43,479 --> 00:19:46,982 to think of you doing that to yourself. 360 00:19:47,274 --> 00:19:49,276 - Yeah? -Mm-hmm. 361 00:19:49,568 --> 00:19:51,070 Yeah, I could do that. 362 00:19:51,362 --> 00:19:53,280 - Hey, you wanna watch? -Mm-mm. 363 00:19:53,572 --> 00:19:55,491 No, that's okay, that's okay. Yeah. 364 00:20:09,046 --> 00:20:10,798 You look beautiful, Cassie. 365 00:20:12,842 --> 00:20:15,052 It's okay. 366 00:20:15,344 --> 00:20:16,887 It's just us. 367 00:20:18,556 --> 00:20:20,474 It's always been just us. 368 00:20:20,766 --> 00:20:24,103 - But I ran away. -You're not going anywhere now. 369 00:20:26,397 --> 00:20:29,150 [Scoffs] Are you freaking kidding me? 370 00:20:42,538 --> 00:20:45,040 [Grunting] 371 00:20:54,467 --> 00:20:57,136 Ah! Ah! Ah! 372 00:21:02,683 --> 00:21:04,852 [Woman's voice] Well, the results say that Adam suffers 373 00:21:05,144 --> 00:21:06,562 "from Necrzoospermia," 374 00:21:06,854 --> 00:21:09,732 which means that all of his sperm are non-viable. 375 00:21:10,024 --> 00:21:11,484 Which means dead. 376 00:21:11,776 --> 00:21:13,486 All of them? 377 00:21:13,778 --> 00:21:16,113 -[Woman] There's really nothing we can do. -Well, I'm sorry, doctor, 378 00:21:16,405 --> 00:21:18,574 I just don't know what I'm supposed to do in this situation. 379 00:21:18,866 --> 00:21:21,660 After all this time, I know how frustrated you must be. 380 00:21:21,952 --> 00:21:23,621 Look, the waiting list for sperm banks 381 00:21:23,913 --> 00:21:26,916 and adoption agencies are at least two to three years. 382 00:21:27,208 --> 00:21:30,336 If you want my honest, completely off-the-record opinion, 383 00:21:30,628 --> 00:21:31,837 if it were me, 384 00:21:32,129 --> 00:21:34,131 I would try to get a friend, or someone I knew, 385 00:21:34,423 --> 00:21:36,675 to give me a personal donation. 386 00:21:41,180 --> 00:21:43,516 First you folks tell me what you paid for it. 387 00:21:43,808 --> 00:21:45,392 Then we'll have a good laugh about it 388 00:21:45,684 --> 00:21:46,769 and we'll start "Jewing" them down. 389 00:21:47,061 --> 00:21:49,063 -[Laughter] -[Telephone ringing] 390 00:21:49,355 --> 00:21:51,232 - The hell with it. -Line one for you, Bruce! 391 00:21:51,524 --> 00:21:52,775 Yes, thank you, Georgina. 392 00:21:56,946 --> 00:21:59,281 - The buck stops here, how can I help you? -Bruce? 393 00:21:59,573 --> 00:22:01,116 - It's Heather Mitchell. -You're the only Heather in town. 394 00:22:01,408 --> 00:22:02,618 You don't need to tell me your full name 395 00:22:02,910 --> 00:22:04,787 every single time you call. 396 00:22:05,079 --> 00:22:06,413 You know. 397 00:22:08,415 --> 00:22:10,626 Not a lot of funerals end with an orgy throw-down. 398 00:22:10,918 --> 00:22:13,796 [Laughter] 399 00:22:14,088 --> 00:22:16,632 - I'd go to an orgy. -No, you wouldn't. 400 00:22:16,924 --> 00:22:19,093 Yeah, I can grow a mustache for it, 401 00:22:19,385 --> 00:22:21,804 - or a soul patch -[Grimaces] whatever. 402 00:22:22,096 --> 00:22:23,222 I'll have you know, I'm an extremely 403 00:22:23,514 --> 00:22:25,766 - sexual person. -Oh, my god. 404 00:22:26,058 --> 00:22:28,352 I had a sex dream about you once. 405 00:22:28,644 --> 00:22:31,021 I don't want to know that. 406 00:22:31,313 --> 00:22:32,523 Do you have any idea how many people 407 00:22:32,815 --> 00:22:34,900 I've had sex dreams about? 408 00:22:35,192 --> 00:22:37,862 It's hardly an exclusive club, okay? 409 00:22:41,448 --> 00:22:43,909 So... how was I? 410 00:22:44,201 --> 00:22:46,245 [Chuckles] 411 00:22:46,537 --> 00:22:48,497 Oh, screw you! Whatever. 412 00:22:48,789 --> 00:22:50,332 If I sucked, it's probably because 413 00:22:50,624 --> 00:22:52,167 - you have a shitty imagination. -Okay, you know what? 414 00:22:52,459 --> 00:22:54,461 I knew you'd be weird about this. I knew you would be. 415 00:22:54,753 --> 00:22:56,755 You're my boss, dude, and you babysat me once. 416 00:22:57,047 --> 00:22:58,632 - So. -I think. 417 00:22:58,924 --> 00:23:00,509 It is actually illegal for you to be into me, or something. 418 00:23:00,801 --> 00:23:02,511 Okay, first of all, I did not say I was into you, 419 00:23:02,803 --> 00:23:04,597 and secondly, I didn't babysit you. 420 00:23:04,889 --> 00:23:07,683 We played video games while our moms smoked cigarettes and played bridge. 421 00:23:07,975 --> 00:23:08,976 So, it doesn't... 422 00:23:09,268 --> 00:23:10,978 That's what guys do, though, isn't it? 423 00:23:11,270 --> 00:23:13,564 They befriend a girl just to gain her trust, 424 00:23:13,856 --> 00:23:15,441 so that they can have sex with them. 425 00:23:15,733 --> 00:23:17,067 I mean, why else are you friends with me? 426 00:23:17,359 --> 00:23:19,069 [Scoffs] Must be your shining personality. 427 00:23:19,361 --> 00:23:21,864 Your sarcastic tone is unnecessary. 428 00:23:22,156 --> 00:23:23,824 [Cell phone ringing] 429 00:23:24,116 --> 00:23:24,867 [Beep] 430 00:23:25,159 --> 00:23:27,036 Hey, Heather. What's going on? 431 00:23:29,663 --> 00:23:31,123 In the matter of the last will and testament, 432 00:23:31,415 --> 00:23:35,044 of Maureen Margaret Cranston... 433 00:23:35,336 --> 00:23:37,630 She has declared that her residuals 434 00:23:37,922 --> 00:23:39,924 from any book sales, which as you know 435 00:23:40,215 --> 00:23:41,759 are still quite considerable, 436 00:23:42,051 --> 00:23:43,802 as well as any assets that she has, 437 00:23:44,094 --> 00:23:46,221 financial institutions, holdings, etcetera, 438 00:23:46,513 --> 00:23:51,018 be used to build a new town library. 439 00:23:53,646 --> 00:23:57,066 Uh, I'm sorry. What? 440 00:23:57,358 --> 00:23:58,984 She wants to build a library. 441 00:23:59,276 --> 00:24:00,444 Remember I told you that the library burned down? 442 00:24:00,736 --> 00:24:02,112 I could show you the blueprints, actually, 443 00:24:02,404 --> 00:24:03,405 if you give me a second, here, 444 00:24:03,697 --> 00:24:05,366 because they are something to behold. 445 00:24:05,658 --> 00:24:07,409 - They spared no expense. -[Dial-up modem beeping] 446 00:24:07,701 --> 00:24:09,286 Is this a joke? 447 00:24:09,578 --> 00:24:12,164 No, we're still on dial-up. Yeah. 448 00:24:12,456 --> 00:24:14,583 Town council actually voted down high-speed Internet, 449 00:24:14,875 --> 00:24:17,544 something about ready access to pornography. 450 00:24:17,836 --> 00:24:20,673 No, no. I mean, about the money. 451 00:24:20,965 --> 00:24:22,132 There's there's nothing? 452 00:24:22,424 --> 00:24:23,550 No, there's not true. 453 00:24:23,842 --> 00:24:25,803 Uh, you, you can live in the house 454 00:24:26,095 --> 00:24:27,888 for as long as you should want to. 455 00:24:28,180 --> 00:24:29,139 Well, what would that be worth? 456 00:24:29,431 --> 00:24:32,351 It's not I mean, a lot, but... 457 00:24:32,643 --> 00:24:35,104 Again, if you should choose to sell the house, 458 00:24:35,396 --> 00:24:36,522 I'd go right back into the library. 459 00:24:36,814 --> 00:24:41,110 So, uh, she left me nothing, then? 460 00:24:43,821 --> 00:24:45,072 Um, well, 461 00:24:45,364 --> 00:24:49,451 Heather actually made you this casserole, so. 462 00:24:49,743 --> 00:24:51,412 There's three kinds of cheese, 463 00:24:51,704 --> 00:24:54,456 and there's Broccolini in there, I think. 464 00:24:54,748 --> 00:24:58,002 Would you, um, mind giving me a minute, please? 465 00:24:58,293 --> 00:25:00,045 - Alone. -Yeah. Yeah. 466 00:25:04,091 --> 00:25:07,261 -[Cell phone vibrates] -Oh, my god. 467 00:25:07,553 --> 00:25:08,345 Of course. 468 00:25:11,849 --> 00:25:13,100 - Hello? -Hey. 469 00:25:13,392 --> 00:25:15,394 I was just calling to check in, see how you're doing. 470 00:25:15,686 --> 00:25:18,856 Well, you know, I'm pretty terrible, actually. 471 00:25:19,148 --> 00:25:22,067 Oh, uh, okay. 472 00:25:22,359 --> 00:25:24,445 I don't have your book. 473 00:25:24,737 --> 00:25:26,655 - Next week is fine. -No, I mean, 474 00:25:26,947 --> 00:25:29,825 I I don't have your book, I haven't written anything. 475 00:25:30,117 --> 00:25:31,994 I came back here hoping I could use my inheritance 476 00:25:32,286 --> 00:25:33,996 to pay back the advance, 477 00:25:34,288 --> 00:25:36,457 but my mother didn't leave me anything. 478 00:25:36,749 --> 00:25:37,708 [Cries] 479 00:25:38,000 --> 00:25:39,168 Nothing. 480 00:25:41,211 --> 00:25:43,338 - We had plans. -I know. 481 00:25:43,630 --> 00:25:45,799 All this time, why didn't you say something? 482 00:25:46,091 --> 00:25:47,843 I don't know. 483 00:25:48,135 --> 00:25:49,428 [Sniffles] 484 00:25:49,720 --> 00:25:51,472 - I fucked up. -Look. 485 00:25:51,764 --> 00:25:52,890 I'm gonna make this easy for you 486 00:25:53,182 --> 00:25:54,725 because you're going through a lot right now. 487 00:25:55,017 --> 00:25:58,479 It doesn't have to be the book that you originally pitched me, 488 00:25:58,771 --> 00:26:00,647 but it has to be something. 489 00:26:00,939 --> 00:26:04,026 It has to be sexy and honest and raw. 490 00:26:04,318 --> 00:26:05,652 Dig deep. 491 00:26:07,362 --> 00:26:10,282 You have 24 hours to send me a pitch or return the money. 492 00:26:10,574 --> 00:26:13,243 And if neither of those happen? 493 00:26:13,535 --> 00:26:15,496 - You know any good lawyers? -Nope, 494 00:26:15,788 --> 00:26:18,248 just a shitty small-town one. 495 00:26:18,540 --> 00:26:20,459 And here we are. 496 00:26:20,751 --> 00:26:21,794 [Turns off ignition] 497 00:26:24,421 --> 00:26:27,800 Hey, you weren't counting on these royalties, were you? 498 00:26:28,092 --> 00:26:30,177 No, of course not. 499 00:26:30,469 --> 00:26:33,055 Yeah. Right. Big city writer, right? 500 00:26:35,641 --> 00:26:38,268 It's nice to see you I mean, 501 00:26:38,560 --> 00:26:41,313 with lots of terrible circumstances, but, uh, 502 00:26:41,605 --> 00:26:43,899 you never realize how much you miss somebody, 503 00:26:44,191 --> 00:26:45,818 until... 504 00:26:46,110 --> 00:26:48,028 - Until what? -I don't know where I was going with that. 505 00:26:48,320 --> 00:26:50,489 I just, uh... 506 00:26:50,781 --> 00:26:54,493 You know, I just didn't like how things ended with us, 507 00:26:54,785 --> 00:26:56,161 obviously. 508 00:26:56,453 --> 00:26:58,664 You mean like how you ran off, like a coward 509 00:26:58,956 --> 00:27:00,749 and you hid in the bathroom? 510 00:27:01,041 --> 00:27:04,378 Yes, that's that's, uh... that's yeah. 511 00:27:04,670 --> 00:27:07,172 You know, technically, 512 00:27:07,464 --> 00:27:09,675 we never really ended things. 513 00:27:09,967 --> 00:27:11,844 [Chuckles] Yeah. 514 00:27:12,136 --> 00:27:14,096 And we never broke up. 515 00:27:14,388 --> 00:27:16,932 I came back for you, Adam. 516 00:27:18,934 --> 00:27:21,979 Okay, I can’t tell if you're messing with me. 517 00:27:22,271 --> 00:27:23,897 - Can't you? -I 518 00:27:25,023 --> 00:27:26,733 hey. [Chuckles] 519 00:27:28,026 --> 00:27:31,113 -[Sighs] -What're you doing here? 520 00:27:31,405 --> 00:27:34,408 Well, I could ask you the same thing, sugar pie. 521 00:27:34,700 --> 00:27:36,618 Just, uh, the estate meeting today... 522 00:27:36,910 --> 00:27:38,495 - Of course. -...Is what we're doing, talking about it, yeah. 523 00:27:38,787 --> 00:27:40,789 What are you doing here? 524 00:27:41,081 --> 00:27:43,417 Well, I was hoping we could have a little chat. 525 00:27:43,709 --> 00:27:44,543 Just us girls. 526 00:27:48,881 --> 00:27:51,258 So... you and Adam. 527 00:27:51,550 --> 00:27:54,511 Oh, absolutely. 528 00:27:54,803 --> 00:27:56,013 It's funny. 529 00:27:56,305 --> 00:27:59,183 I just never really pictured you two together. 530 00:27:59,474 --> 00:28:03,145 You know, he will make a wonderful father. 531 00:28:05,314 --> 00:28:07,858 Well, sounds like you have your future all mapped out. 532 00:28:08,150 --> 00:28:10,485 That's that's really nice. 533 00:28:10,777 --> 00:28:13,363 So, funny thing, 534 00:28:13,655 --> 00:28:16,658 I was re-reading that one article of yours. 535 00:28:16,950 --> 00:28:18,368 Some very witty 536 00:28:18,660 --> 00:28:20,954 and wonderful turns of phrase, by the way, 537 00:28:21,246 --> 00:28:23,415 - no wonder it caught a virus. -Went viral? 538 00:28:23,707 --> 00:28:26,293 And I was thinking, you may be right about a few things. 539 00:28:26,585 --> 00:28:29,046 Perhaps we are a little bit sexually repressed. 540 00:28:29,338 --> 00:28:31,673 At any rate, I was thinking, 541 00:28:31,965 --> 00:28:33,258 you know we probably could use 542 00:28:33,550 --> 00:28:35,594 a little shake up here in beaver's Ridge, 543 00:28:35,886 --> 00:28:39,139 and I think your orgy idea is just the ticket. 544 00:28:39,431 --> 00:28:41,558 What hang on, my orgy-what-now? 545 00:28:41,850 --> 00:28:45,062 I'll organize, and you can instruct. 546 00:28:45,354 --> 00:28:47,439 - Uh, no. -At least think about it. 547 00:28:47,731 --> 00:28:49,274 It's really the least you could do. 548 00:28:49,566 --> 00:28:52,903 Actually, the least I can do is nothing. 549 00:28:53,195 --> 00:28:55,072 Well, now who's being the small-minded one? 550 00:28:55,364 --> 00:28:58,659 You know, I thought you would jump at the chance to watch all of us 551 00:28:58,951 --> 00:29:00,202 make fools of ourselves 552 00:29:00,494 --> 00:29:03,330 as we delve into the perversions of your mind. 553 00:29:03,622 --> 00:29:05,123 You know, probably give you fodder 554 00:29:05,415 --> 00:29:07,125 for a whole new series of articles, 555 00:29:07,417 --> 00:29:08,710 "how to plan an orgy in a small town." 556 00:29:09,002 --> 00:29:12,339 I mean, if you can come up with a better title. 557 00:29:12,631 --> 00:29:14,716 Unless, of course, you can't handle it. 558 00:29:17,261 --> 00:29:20,222 So, all I would have to do is instruct? 559 00:29:21,848 --> 00:29:23,225 I mean, like, I wouldn't actually have to... 560 00:29:23,517 --> 00:29:25,769 Fornicate with us? Oh, god. No. 561 00:29:26,937 --> 00:29:27,771 [Doorbell rings] 562 00:29:29,856 --> 00:29:31,400 [Gasps] 563 00:29:31,692 --> 00:29:33,610 Heather wants me to plan a sex party. 564 00:29:33,902 --> 00:29:35,487 [Laughs] 565 00:29:35,779 --> 00:29:38,115 Oh, that's fucking hilarious. 566 00:29:38,407 --> 00:29:41,868 Mmm. But, what's wrong? 567 00:29:43,328 --> 00:29:46,081 - I'm a virgin. -[Laughs] 568 00:29:47,749 --> 00:29:48,542 [Gasps] 569 00:29:51,044 --> 00:29:52,421 So, just to clarify 570 00:29:52,713 --> 00:29:55,841 everything you know about sex is bullshit? 571 00:29:56,133 --> 00:29:58,260 No, that that’s that's not true. 572 00:29:58,552 --> 00:30:00,929 I've I've interviewed people, 573 00:30:01,221 --> 00:30:02,514 and I go to bars, and... 574 00:30:02,806 --> 00:30:06,768 I belong to a few sex clubs. It's just no applied knowledge. 575 00:30:07,060 --> 00:30:09,146 [Laughing] 576 00:30:10,939 --> 00:30:13,317 Wait. Did your father molest you? 577 00:30:13,608 --> 00:30:16,278 - Alice, Jesus Christ. -Okay. 578 00:30:16,570 --> 00:30:17,696 Well, I'm sorry. 579 00:30:17,988 --> 00:30:19,823 I just have to ask 'cause that happens to people. 580 00:30:20,115 --> 00:30:22,951 And then they get all psychologically mashed up, and then they 581 00:30:23,243 --> 00:30:24,619 like their vagina's sealed shut, 582 00:30:24,911 --> 00:30:28,081 - so they can't even have sex. -Okay, well, it's not that. 583 00:30:28,373 --> 00:30:32,044 -'Cause you're terrified of sex? -No. [Scoffs] 584 00:30:32,336 --> 00:30:36,798 I'm just waiting for someone I can trust. 585 00:30:37,090 --> 00:30:39,426 I need a new drink 'cause I just threw up in that one. 586 00:30:39,718 --> 00:30:41,303 Okay, fuck off. 587 00:30:42,846 --> 00:30:45,140 Will you come with me to this thing, or not? 588 00:30:45,432 --> 00:30:46,600 Sweetie, 589 00:30:46,892 --> 00:30:49,686 you're my very best friend in this whole stupid town. 590 00:30:49,978 --> 00:30:51,730 I will totally come to your orgy, 591 00:30:52,022 --> 00:30:54,107 and I will totally be there for you, 592 00:30:54,399 --> 00:30:57,861 and I will totally bang all the hot guys that show up. 593 00:30:59,613 --> 00:31:02,991 [Telephone rings] 594 00:31:03,283 --> 00:31:05,535 That was fast. What's the verdict? 595 00:31:05,827 --> 00:31:07,537 I'm digging deep. 596 00:31:07,829 --> 00:31:10,582 [Music playing] 597 00:31:25,972 --> 00:31:26,932 Ow! 598 00:31:36,525 --> 00:31:37,859 [Doorbell rings] 599 00:31:40,070 --> 00:31:42,864 - You ready? -[Sighs] 600 00:31:43,156 --> 00:31:44,324 I I don't know. 601 00:31:44,616 --> 00:31:46,159 I feel like I'm gonna throw up. 602 00:31:46,451 --> 00:31:48,120 I mean I mean, can we do this? 603 00:31:48,412 --> 00:31:49,704 Is this us? 604 00:31:49,996 --> 00:31:52,457 Are we are we orgy people? 605 00:31:52,749 --> 00:31:54,251 What we're not is quitters. 606 00:31:54,543 --> 00:31:57,254 Now, if we don't go downstairs and open that door, 607 00:31:57,546 --> 00:31:59,881 then everything that Cassie Cranston thinks about us 608 00:32:00,173 --> 00:32:01,341 and beaver's Ridge, will be true. 609 00:32:01,633 --> 00:32:03,677 She'll think that we're cowards. 610 00:32:03,969 --> 00:32:05,679 Is that what you want her to think about you? 611 00:32:07,848 --> 00:32:11,518 So, I know all of you are sexually active, 612 00:32:11,810 --> 00:32:13,145 but what you are about to embark on 613 00:32:13,437 --> 00:32:15,564 needs to be treated and seen 614 00:32:15,856 --> 00:32:18,608 with the respect of a sport. 615 00:32:18,900 --> 00:32:19,734 Okay? 616 00:32:20,026 --> 00:32:21,278 There will be surprises. 617 00:32:21,570 --> 00:32:22,529 The odd queef. 618 00:32:22,821 --> 00:32:25,824 Yeah, okay, yeah. What is a "queef"? 619 00:32:26,116 --> 00:32:27,284 Oh, um, 620 00:32:27,576 --> 00:32:31,705 okay, it's like flatulence, that comes out of your 621 00:32:31,997 --> 00:32:33,290 -[clicks tongue] -Mm-hmm. 622 00:32:33,582 --> 00:32:37,627 Basically, you're hammering large quantities of air 623 00:32:37,919 --> 00:32:39,921 into a tight, moist, space, 624 00:32:40,213 --> 00:32:41,548 so, sounds are gonna be made. 625 00:32:41,840 --> 00:32:43,425 Next, um, stamina. 626 00:32:43,717 --> 00:32:47,846 It's gonna go a lot faster than you think. Pornography lies. 627 00:32:48,138 --> 00:32:50,015 No man can go properly for 40 minutes 628 00:32:50,307 --> 00:32:52,058 without having an aneurism, and at that point, 629 00:32:52,350 --> 00:32:54,352 any woman's vagina is gonna be squealing 630 00:32:54,644 --> 00:32:55,729 like a worn-out brake pad 631 00:32:56,021 --> 00:32:58,899 at the end of a high-speed chase. 632 00:32:59,191 --> 00:33:01,776 Are these colorful phrases really necessary? 633 00:33:02,068 --> 00:33:03,778 Well, we need to know what to expect. 634 00:33:04,070 --> 00:33:06,656 You need to stay hydrated. You're gonna sweat. 635 00:33:06,948 --> 00:33:09,826 Which brings me to my next topic. 636 00:33:10,118 --> 00:33:12,621 Sex stank. 637 00:33:12,913 --> 00:33:14,581 You're not gonna notice your own. 638 00:33:14,873 --> 00:33:16,583 Buyout will notice other peoples, 639 00:33:16,875 --> 00:33:18,877 and in a room full of people sweating, 640 00:33:19,169 --> 00:33:22,422 and mashing their genitals together, 641 00:33:22,714 --> 00:33:23,798 it's it's gonna create a 642 00:33:24,090 --> 00:33:25,717 musk. 643 00:33:26,009 --> 00:33:28,470 How bad could it possibly be? 644 00:33:28,762 --> 00:33:30,430 Oh, bad. Thick. 645 00:33:30,722 --> 00:33:32,974 It's gonna seep into everything. 646 00:33:33,266 --> 00:33:36,728 Thank god I got these lovely plastic couch covers. 647 00:33:38,230 --> 00:33:39,940 - So, shall we just dive right in? -Mm-hmm. 648 00:33:40,232 --> 00:33:41,650 - Well. -Mm-hmm. 649 00:33:41,942 --> 00:33:45,362 I think this was supposed to just be a preliminary chat. 650 00:33:45,654 --> 00:33:48,657 Did anyone here think we were just gonna dive right in? 651 00:33:48,949 --> 00:33:51,993 Oh, okay. Wow. 652 00:33:52,285 --> 00:33:55,080 " Ever since I can remember " 653 00:33:55,372 --> 00:33:57,332 " ever since this baby spoke " 654 00:33:57,624 --> 00:33:59,709 " I've been vying for a stint " 655 00:34:00,001 --> 00:34:02,837 " in the land of mirrors and smoke " 656 00:34:03,129 --> 00:34:05,131 " you know, I love the smell of whiskey " 657 00:34:05,423 --> 00:34:07,842 " and I hate the taste of gin " 658 00:34:08,134 --> 00:34:09,886 " but I always feel at home " 659 00:34:10,178 --> 00:34:12,806 " in a place that's soaked in sin " 660 00:34:13,098 --> 00:34:15,392 " but I wanna leave it " 661 00:34:15,684 --> 00:34:17,644 " all behind " 662 00:34:17,936 --> 00:34:20,146 " if I could find me a man " 663 00:34:20,438 --> 00:34:23,316 " to treat me right, but until then... " 664 00:34:23,608 --> 00:34:24,734 Okay, uh, guys, 665 00:34:25,026 --> 00:34:26,611 I I think think if you're gonna do this, 666 00:34:26,903 --> 00:34:28,738 you just have to rip the band-aid off, 667 00:34:29,030 --> 00:34:32,200 and, and... do it. You know? 668 00:34:32,492 --> 00:34:33,451 Yeah. 669 00:34:33,743 --> 00:34:35,370 Heather, do you have an egg timer? 670 00:34:35,662 --> 00:34:37,747 - Yes, I do. Yeah. -That way, we can set the timer 671 00:34:38,039 --> 00:34:39,332 for five minutes and give everybody 672 00:34:39,624 --> 00:34:42,919 a chance to switch it up, if they want to. 673 00:34:43,211 --> 00:34:45,338 Um, I... 674 00:34:47,048 --> 00:34:49,968 All right, we're gonna kick it old-school. 675 00:34:50,260 --> 00:34:52,095 Gentlemen, put your keys in the bowl. 676 00:34:52,387 --> 00:34:55,056 [Snaps fingers] Yeah. Oh, I walked here, can I use fishing license? 677 00:34:55,348 --> 00:34:56,975 -[Gags] -How do you not have keys? 678 00:34:57,267 --> 00:34:59,227 Who locks their door? 679 00:35:03,857 --> 00:35:06,568 So, my choices are Adam, or Bruce. 680 00:35:06,860 --> 00:35:08,987 Uh, can't have sex with Adam. He's your husband. 681 00:35:09,279 --> 00:35:12,032 Right, I mean, why would you want to sleep with me? 682 00:35:12,324 --> 00:35:14,409 - You're right. -[Bruce] I was kidding. 683 00:35:14,701 --> 00:35:17,287 Okay, Bruce. Let's make the best of it. 684 00:35:17,579 --> 00:35:18,872 A little less enthusiasm, please. 685 00:35:19,164 --> 00:35:21,750 [Music playing] 686 00:35:27,881 --> 00:35:29,299 How are we not already having sex? 687 00:35:29,591 --> 00:35:31,092 I'm sorry. I'm sorry, I I just, 688 00:35:31,384 --> 00:35:32,802 you're just you you're really beautiful. 689 00:35:33,094 --> 00:35:34,262 I'm sorry. 690 00:35:34,554 --> 00:35:35,764 It's okay. You know what I'm gonna do? 691 00:35:36,056 --> 00:35:37,223 I'm gonna close my eyes, 692 00:35:37,515 --> 00:35:38,767 and I'm just gonna imagine that you have leprosy. 693 00:35:39,059 --> 00:35:40,810 And then, otherwise, this is gonna 694 00:35:41,102 --> 00:35:42,187 [imitates explosion] 695 00:35:42,479 --> 00:35:44,189 - And that's not... -[Sighs] 696 00:35:44,481 --> 00:35:46,316 You shouldn’t tell people that. 697 00:35:55,408 --> 00:35:57,327 No okay, uh, just give me a second. 698 00:35:57,619 --> 00:35:58,828 Give me a second. 699 00:35:59,120 --> 00:36:02,374 Okay okay, I'm good now. I'm good. 700 00:36:02,666 --> 00:36:04,417 Nope. Nope. 701 00:36:04,709 --> 00:36:06,628 -[Moaning] -That's my jawbone. 702 00:36:06,920 --> 00:36:08,755 - Yeah. -Oh, so defiant. 703 00:36:09,047 --> 00:36:11,841 Slow it down, slow it way down. 704 00:36:12,133 --> 00:36:13,635 Slow it way down. 705 00:36:13,927 --> 00:36:17,138 -[Moaning] -Uh... okay... 706 00:36:19,057 --> 00:36:21,434 Oh, my god, your lips. 707 00:36:21,726 --> 00:36:24,354 - My lips? -They're so soft. 708 00:36:24,646 --> 00:36:26,147 What do you put on them? 709 00:36:26,439 --> 00:36:30,026 Uh, well, wine. Wine, mostly. 710 00:36:30,318 --> 00:36:31,820 Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait 711 00:36:32,112 --> 00:36:33,655 wait, wait, wait, wait. No, no, no, no. 712 00:36:33,947 --> 00:36:35,657 - No, no, no, I can't. -[Buzzing noise] 713 00:36:35,949 --> 00:36:37,659 No, no, no, no, just hold it. Hold on. 714 00:36:37,951 --> 00:36:39,577 [Inhales] 715 00:36:39,869 --> 00:36:41,579 Stop staring, it's rude. 716 00:36:41,871 --> 00:36:43,998 Where am I supposed to look? 717 00:36:44,290 --> 00:36:47,377 - Is this turning you on? -It's not 718 00:36:47,669 --> 00:36:49,087 not turning me on. 719 00:36:51,881 --> 00:36:55,468 Three, two, wa wait. No, I need I need six... 720 00:36:55,760 --> 00:36:57,011 - No, that's it. -Uh! 721 00:36:57,303 --> 00:36:58,680 -[Dings] -[Moans] 722 00:36:58,972 --> 00:37:00,223 Oh, come on. Come on, I was just getting my groove on. 723 00:37:00,515 --> 00:37:02,392 - Time's up. Chester? -Uh, yeah, I'm sorry. 724 00:37:02,684 --> 00:37:05,145 Excuse me, I'm I'm gonna need a few minutes, to, uh, pardon me. 725 00:37:05,437 --> 00:37:06,896 Replenish the fluids here 'cause... 726 00:37:07,188 --> 00:37:09,524 - Whoa, did you already? -I just grazed the tip. 727 00:37:09,816 --> 00:37:11,234 - I grazed it. -Please. Please tell me 728 00:37:11,526 --> 00:37:13,361 - it was on the couch cover. -I'm ready to party. 729 00:37:13,653 --> 00:37:14,863 - Jeez. -Is that normal? 730 00:37:15,155 --> 00:37:16,448 God no. 731 00:37:16,740 --> 00:37:18,199 - Hey, why don’t we have some make-up sex? -Oh, no. 732 00:37:18,491 --> 00:37:20,744 Did not all the energy in here just get sucked out? 733 00:37:21,035 --> 00:37:23,204 - No, no, it didn't. Ow. -Um, I think we 734 00:37:23,496 --> 00:37:25,498 we ripped the band-aid off a little too quickly here. 735 00:37:25,790 --> 00:37:27,083 We should have catered. 736 00:37:27,375 --> 00:37:29,127 A potluck would have been nice. 737 00:37:29,419 --> 00:37:31,629 Cassie, I feel like we're gonna need some spare dicks, 738 00:37:31,921 --> 00:37:34,132 in case, you know, chappy gets pre-maturely excited, 739 00:37:34,424 --> 00:37:35,925 - just keep the party going. -I can hear you. 740 00:37:36,217 --> 00:37:37,427 - Agreed. -You know what would be good? 741 00:37:37,719 --> 00:37:39,095 Is maybe if we had some other ladies as well? 742 00:37:39,387 --> 00:37:41,306 - Yeah. -People from around town. 743 00:37:41,598 --> 00:37:42,807 Or Cassie, if you wanted get involved. 744 00:37:43,099 --> 00:37:44,392 Uh, no. [Chuckles] 745 00:37:44,684 --> 00:37:46,019 I I mean, I I, that wasn't 746 00:37:46,311 --> 00:37:47,812 that wasn't part of the no. 747 00:37:48,104 --> 00:37:50,690 Um, okay, I think this little experiment has just proven 748 00:37:50,982 --> 00:37:53,026 that we need to go a little bit slower. 749 00:37:53,318 --> 00:37:54,068 [Groans] 750 00:37:54,360 --> 00:37:56,321 So, let's get together again, 751 00:37:56,613 --> 00:37:59,783 but this time, ease into it, focus on the basics. 752 00:38:00,074 --> 00:38:03,161 And if all goes well, then, round two. 753 00:38:03,453 --> 00:38:04,788 Look, I don't want to sound like a jerk here, okay? 754 00:38:05,079 --> 00:38:06,790 But what am I supposed to do with this erection? 755 00:38:07,081 --> 00:38:08,708 - I mean... -Yeah, I saw a papaya on the counter there 756 00:38:09,000 --> 00:38:10,210 you could probably have your way with. 757 00:38:10,502 --> 00:38:13,171 No, it's too ripe. It's not gonna work. 758 00:38:13,463 --> 00:38:14,589 Why do you know that? 759 00:38:14,881 --> 00:38:16,966 -[Music playing] -[Groaning] 760 00:38:20,595 --> 00:38:21,930 [Ellie] What about Michael Lobucks? 761 00:38:22,222 --> 00:38:23,264 [Heather] He's got a terrible back issue. 762 00:38:23,556 --> 00:38:24,766 He wouldn’t the last five minutes. 763 00:38:25,058 --> 00:38:28,561 - What about the mayor? -Gus, Gus? Been there. 764 00:38:30,647 --> 00:38:33,149 - They can't be black. -Oh, my god. 765 00:38:34,818 --> 00:38:36,903 Wait, Gus is black? 766 00:38:37,195 --> 00:38:39,072 - Mrs. Reddick. -Bruce, she's dead. 767 00:38:39,364 --> 00:38:42,200 Margo and Dave Anderson. 768 00:38:42,492 --> 00:38:43,827 No no. Absolutely not. 769 00:38:44,118 --> 00:38:45,662 Have you seen how he plays charades? 770 00:38:45,954 --> 00:38:47,539 I'm not getting into a sexual situation with that man. 771 00:38:47,831 --> 00:38:49,749 So, there's a bunch of us and we're doing this thing, 772 00:38:50,041 --> 00:38:51,668 - okay? -Yeah. 773 00:38:51,960 --> 00:38:53,378 And, I don't know how to ask... 774 00:38:53,670 --> 00:38:56,464 We've been encouraged to invite other people to the thing. 775 00:38:56,756 --> 00:38:58,258 - Right. -What we're gonna be doing is... 776 00:38:58,550 --> 00:39:00,718 - What kind of thing is it? -We're gonna it's a, 777 00:39:01,010 --> 00:39:03,179 it's like a pri it's like a very... 778 00:39:03,471 --> 00:39:05,098 - It's a private fun thing. -Yeah. 779 00:39:05,390 --> 00:39:08,184 - Yeah. -Like, we're all we are all together... 780 00:39:08,476 --> 00:39:10,019 - In the private thing... -Yeah. 781 00:39:10,311 --> 00:39:13,398 ...where you touch each other's nipples and you fuck each other? 782 00:39:13,690 --> 00:39:15,650 - How do you know what are you -stop trying to invite me 783 00:39:15,942 --> 00:39:18,027 -" to the orgy. " -How do you know about the orgy? 784 00:39:18,319 --> 00:39:21,030 How do I not know about the orgy? Bruce is all over town. 785 00:39:21,322 --> 00:39:23,533 And you need to talk to that guy because everybody in this town 786 00:39:23,825 --> 00:39:25,451 is gonna know what you idiots are up to. 787 00:39:25,743 --> 00:39:28,413 Okay, okay, okay. So he did Bruce invite you to it, already? 788 00:39:28,705 --> 00:39:30,164 - Yes, he did. -He did, eh? 789 00:39:30,456 --> 00:39:31,749 Yes. 790 00:39:32,041 --> 00:39:34,627 - So you... -No. No! 791 00:39:34,919 --> 00:39:36,588 I knew you were gonna ask me that. 792 00:39:36,880 --> 00:39:39,007 - You disappoint me, Chester. -What? 793 00:39:39,299 --> 00:39:41,301 You guys haven't RSVP'ed to my party, yet. 794 00:39:41,593 --> 00:39:44,345 Wow, hey. Seth, man. How long have you been standing there? 795 00:39:44,637 --> 00:39:47,432 Actually, funny that you're here, 796 00:39:47,724 --> 00:39:49,434 because Chester has something that he wants to ask you. 797 00:39:49,726 --> 00:39:51,561 -[Chester] No -there's this thing that's happening. 798 00:39:51,853 --> 00:39:53,271 And, people are encouraged... 799 00:39:53,563 --> 00:39:55,732 - No, that's not -to invite other people... 800 00:39:56,024 --> 00:39:59,277 And he wanted to talk to you about this thing. 801 00:39:59,569 --> 00:40:00,570 No. What? Coming. 802 00:40:00,862 --> 00:40:02,280 I gotta grab this this, delivery. 803 00:40:02,572 --> 00:40:04,115 - Oh, really? -I gotta get this delivery here. 804 00:40:04,407 --> 00:40:05,909 - Interesting. -[Seth] Isn't that your bathroom? 805 00:40:06,200 --> 00:40:07,201 - What? -Are you going to the bathroom? 806 00:40:07,493 --> 00:40:09,162 - Hey, Seth. -Hi, Pauline. 807 00:40:09,454 --> 00:40:11,623 How is your day going, buddy? 808 00:40:11,915 --> 00:40:14,083 - It's busy. -Yeah. 809 00:40:17,086 --> 00:40:19,297 So, you want to have an orgy in a town 810 00:40:19,589 --> 00:40:21,507 where you can dial the wrong number, 811 00:40:21,799 --> 00:40:23,635 and still have a ten-minute conversation? 812 00:40:23,927 --> 00:40:25,762 I'll owe you. 813 00:40:26,054 --> 00:40:27,513 I really need to work the numbers in my favor, 814 00:40:27,805 --> 00:40:30,266 and you coming helps knock some of the other guys out. 815 00:40:30,558 --> 00:40:32,435 - How? -You know... 816 00:40:34,395 --> 00:40:36,481 You smoke a pole man, you know. 817 00:40:36,773 --> 00:40:38,441 - The pole? -Yeah, you play the skin flute, 818 00:40:38,733 --> 00:40:40,151 you put penises in your mouth, 'cause you're gay. 819 00:40:40,443 --> 00:40:42,236 Not 'cause you're happy, 'cause you're a homosexual. 820 00:40:42,528 --> 00:40:43,821 Not that you couldn't be a homosexual and be happy 821 00:40:44,113 --> 00:40:46,407 I'm sure you love it. 822 00:40:46,699 --> 00:40:48,284 So... 823 00:40:48,576 --> 00:40:51,329 You want me at this orgy because I'm gay, 824 00:40:51,621 --> 00:40:55,291 and that will force one of the other non-gay men to sleep with me, 825 00:40:55,583 --> 00:40:58,544 which will make more women available for you? 826 00:40:58,836 --> 00:41:00,380 Look. 827 00:41:00,672 --> 00:41:03,132 I really need this, man. 828 00:41:03,424 --> 00:41:04,842 Allie's leaving me, it was 829 00:41:05,134 --> 00:41:07,011 it was a huge hit to my ego. 830 00:41:08,471 --> 00:41:10,139 If I agree to this, 831 00:41:10,431 --> 00:41:12,266 you give me the full commission on your house. 832 00:41:12,558 --> 00:41:14,352 That's a big commission, man. 833 00:41:14,644 --> 00:41:16,938 - Are you coming to my birthday party? -Jesus Christ. 834 00:41:17,230 --> 00:41:19,399 My mom wanted an RSVP like, yesterday. 835 00:41:19,691 --> 00:41:22,235 I don't know, man. 836 00:41:22,527 --> 00:41:25,738 You should totally come to our party, Seth. 837 00:41:29,784 --> 00:41:31,703 I... 838 00:41:36,541 --> 00:41:39,252 - Alice. -Fuck! Jesus, Seth. 839 00:41:39,544 --> 00:41:41,546 You haven't RSVP'ed to my party, yet. 840 00:41:41,838 --> 00:41:44,215 - Haven't I? -It's just my mom. 841 00:41:44,507 --> 00:41:47,343 She doesn't know how many cupcakes to make. She's freaking out. 842 00:41:47,635 --> 00:41:49,429 Mm. Okay. 843 00:41:49,721 --> 00:41:51,431 Are you going to that party? 844 00:41:51,723 --> 00:41:53,474 - What party? -I don't know. 845 00:41:53,766 --> 00:41:56,352 Bruce told me about some party at Adam's. 846 00:41:56,644 --> 00:41:57,687 - That's been cancelled. -Are you sure? 847 00:41:57,979 --> 00:42:00,273 Because he just told me about it like, just now. 848 00:42:00,565 --> 00:42:01,691 Well, Seth, 849 00:42:01,983 --> 00:42:03,735 I don't know, because Bruce is an idiot. 850 00:42:04,027 --> 00:42:05,028 Yeah. 851 00:42:05,319 --> 00:42:06,362 Hey, um, that's good, 852 00:42:06,654 --> 00:42:08,364 because tomorrow's my party anyways, 853 00:42:08,656 --> 00:42:10,158 so you can just tell everybody to RSVP, 854 00:42:10,450 --> 00:42:11,617 and then they can come. 855 00:42:11,909 --> 00:42:13,953 Okay, I, uh, 856 00:42:14,245 --> 00:42:15,288 I'll try to remember. 857 00:42:15,580 --> 00:42:17,248 - Can I have a glass of water? -I don't. 858 00:42:17,540 --> 00:42:19,083 - I don't have any water. -I'm thirsty. 859 00:42:19,375 --> 00:42:21,210 - Okay. -Do you have a blanket? I'm cold. 860 00:42:26,424 --> 00:42:28,384 So, I think the first thing we need to do here 861 00:42:28,676 --> 00:42:30,053 is is just 862 00:42:30,344 --> 00:42:33,139 acknowledge the awkwardness of the situation. 863 00:42:33,431 --> 00:42:37,226 So, Chester, if maybe we could switch spots. 864 00:42:37,518 --> 00:42:38,686 So you could sit over here. 865 00:42:38,978 --> 00:42:40,438 - You wanna do a -yeah. 866 00:42:40,730 --> 00:42:42,023 Okay. 867 00:42:44,067 --> 00:42:46,611 - So, let's start with Heather. -Hmm. 868 00:42:46,903 --> 00:42:47,862 How does it make you feel 869 00:42:48,154 --> 00:42:50,823 to see Adam with someone else? 870 00:42:53,159 --> 00:42:55,870 Oh, well well, I... 871 00:42:57,330 --> 00:42:59,248 I think we can all be adults here. 872 00:42:59,540 --> 00:43:00,333 Yeah? 873 00:43:00,625 --> 00:43:03,127 Okay, so, this doesn't bother you, 874 00:43:03,419 --> 00:43:06,297 or make you upset or uncomfortable at all? 875 00:43:08,466 --> 00:43:11,052 Mm-mm. No. 876 00:43:11,344 --> 00:43:13,012 No, I think that’s, um, 877 00:43:13,304 --> 00:43:14,472 that's very neighborly of you, 878 00:43:14,764 --> 00:43:16,474 of of both of you. 879 00:43:16,766 --> 00:43:18,476 I'm very neighborly. 880 00:43:18,768 --> 00:43:22,188 - Is this is this hard for you, Adam? -Oh, it's hard for me. 881 00:43:22,480 --> 00:43:24,524 I mean, this it would this 882 00:43:24,816 --> 00:43:27,026 that would be hard for me. That would be challenging. 883 00:43:27,318 --> 00:43:30,238 Yeah, what about this, Heather? Huh? 884 00:43:30,530 --> 00:43:35,618 This must be driving you absolutely insane. 885 00:43:35,910 --> 00:43:37,161 Bruce, what are you doing? 886 00:43:37,453 --> 00:43:39,956 Oh, we're just easing into it, big fella. 887 00:43:40,248 --> 00:43:41,707 You know, you are carrying 888 00:43:41,999 --> 00:43:44,961 - a lot of tension... -Mm-hmm. 889 00:43:45,253 --> 00:43:47,338 ...in your buster deltoids. Can you feel that? 890 00:43:47,630 --> 00:43:49,340 You know what? I'd be a lot easier if I got your shirt off. 891 00:43:49,632 --> 00:43:50,883 - That way we can really get at it. -Um, I don’t think... 892 00:43:51,175 --> 00:43:52,802 -[Doorbell rings] -I'll get it. 893 00:43:53,094 --> 00:43:54,887 - That'll be our additional guests. -Oh. 894 00:43:55,179 --> 00:43:56,264 Yeah, okay, let's just go ahead. 895 00:43:56,556 --> 00:43:57,849 That's a weird way to open a shirt, anyway. 896 00:43:58,141 --> 00:43:59,517 Let's just let's just put the kybosh on that, 897 00:43:59,809 --> 00:44:01,310 - and see who these guests are. -Go away! 898 00:44:01,602 --> 00:44:02,979 Jesus fucking... 899 00:44:04,480 --> 00:44:07,066 Hi, guys. Hey, come on in. 900 00:44:07,358 --> 00:44:09,318 - Thank you. -Everybody, 901 00:44:09,610 --> 00:44:12,905 you remember Anna and Otis. 902 00:44:13,197 --> 00:44:14,824 - From racquetball, right? -[Otis] Hi. 903 00:44:15,116 --> 00:44:17,118 Who the fuck invited you? 904 00:44:18,578 --> 00:44:19,996 Honey, I don't know about this. 905 00:44:20,288 --> 00:44:22,540 Um, just a moment, everyone. 906 00:44:22,832 --> 00:44:24,834 Sure. 907 00:44:25,126 --> 00:44:27,837 [Clears throat] Sweetie, we agreed to this. 908 00:44:28,129 --> 00:44:30,423 Everything we tried hasn't been working. 909 00:44:30,715 --> 00:44:33,134 The long walks, the spicy food, the primrose oil. 910 00:44:33,426 --> 00:44:35,261 I mean, the mid-wife thought that maybe this would do the trick. 911 00:44:35,553 --> 00:44:37,013 - I know. -We want to do it naturally. 912 00:44:37,305 --> 00:44:40,349 I know, I know, but why can't it just be you? 913 00:44:40,641 --> 00:44:44,187 Because it's been me for the last 48 hours and I'm exhausted. 914 00:44:46,939 --> 00:44:48,983 -[Sighs] -Listen, you 915 00:44:49,275 --> 00:44:52,069 you're peeing every ten minutes, you're not sleeping. 916 00:44:52,361 --> 00:44:56,490 I love you so much, but this baby needs to come out. 917 00:44:56,782 --> 00:44:58,326 [Sighs] 918 00:44:58,618 --> 00:44:59,869 - You're right. -Yeah. 919 00:45:00,161 --> 00:45:01,037 [Sighs] 920 00:45:01,329 --> 00:45:03,247 - We need to do this. -Right. 921 00:45:03,539 --> 00:45:05,333 I love you. 922 00:45:05,625 --> 00:45:07,793 - Okay. -Are we ready? 923 00:45:08,085 --> 00:45:09,420 Yeah, I'm ready. 924 00:45:11,172 --> 00:45:15,968 Okay, so, who's gonna fuck my wife first? 925 00:45:16,260 --> 00:45:17,720 [Clears throat] 926 00:45:19,263 --> 00:45:20,681 Okay, uh, sexual positions... 927 00:45:20,973 --> 00:45:22,099 Oh, uh, I know all three of them, 928 00:45:22,391 --> 00:45:24,143 but we only do the doggy-style. 929 00:45:24,435 --> 00:45:26,229 - I'm sorry, all three of them? -Mm-hmm. 930 00:45:26,520 --> 00:45:28,356 You guys don't look at each other when you 931 00:45:28,648 --> 00:45:29,774 - nope. -Mm-mm. 932 00:45:30,066 --> 00:45:31,609 Why not? 933 00:45:31,901 --> 00:45:33,486 You know, I don’t think anyone wants to know that. 934 00:45:33,778 --> 00:45:34,779 - I wanna know. -I'd love to know. 935 00:45:35,071 --> 00:45:36,197 It's private, it's between us. 936 00:45:36,489 --> 00:45:37,865 - He makes a face. -Okay. 937 00:45:38,157 --> 00:45:39,116 - It's very unpleasant. -It's involuntary. 938 00:45:39,408 --> 00:45:40,993 It's disturbing, actually. 939 00:45:41,285 --> 00:45:43,537 It's like a sneeze. Would you judge a person for how they sneeze? 940 00:45:43,829 --> 00:45:47,083 Oh okay, let's not ruin the surprise. 941 00:45:47,375 --> 00:45:51,629 Um. [Clears throat] We have some work to do. Everybody grab a partner. 942 00:45:51,921 --> 00:45:53,589 Okay, I drew up some sexual positions 943 00:45:53,589 --> 00:45:54,966 for us to try here. 944 00:45:55,258 --> 00:45:56,884 - What, really? Me? -Get lost. 945 00:45:57,176 --> 00:45:58,511 Thank you. I would I would be honored. 946 00:45:58,803 --> 00:46:00,721 If we could just skip the Lego instructions. 947 00:46:01,013 --> 00:46:02,682 I mean, clearly, I've done this before. 948 00:46:02,974 --> 00:46:05,309 I really just need someone to bang the baby out of me. 949 00:46:05,601 --> 00:46:08,771 Uh, also, if you could ejaculate directly inside 950 00:46:09,063 --> 00:46:11,023 my wife's vagina, that would be great. 951 00:46:11,315 --> 00:46:13,150 Uh, it actually contains prosteligence 952 00:46:13,442 --> 00:46:17,571 which can stimulate the cervix and can cause contractions. 953 00:46:17,863 --> 00:46:19,448 Yeah. 954 00:46:21,701 --> 00:46:23,703 [Anna groans] Can you not put all your weight on me? 955 00:46:23,995 --> 00:46:27,790 - It makes me feel like I gotta pee. -You wanna pee on me? 956 00:46:28,082 --> 00:46:29,875 That is not even close to what I said. 957 00:46:30,167 --> 00:46:34,046 Okay, Bruce, why don't you try putting her leg over your shoulder? 958 00:46:34,338 --> 00:46:36,424 - Oh, oh, ooh. -Yeah, yeah. 959 00:46:36,716 --> 00:46:38,050 It actually feels, it does feel good. 960 00:46:38,342 --> 00:46:39,885 Honey, why have we never tried this position? 961 00:46:40,177 --> 00:46:42,847 - I didn't know you liked that. -Well, you could have asked. 962 00:46:43,139 --> 00:46:46,392 - I'm not a mind-reader, pumpkin. -That's why you should ask. 963 00:46:46,684 --> 00:46:49,520 Okay, I I don't think this is the time for that, guys. 964 00:46:49,812 --> 00:46:51,188 Right. Sorry, honey. We're being rude. 965 00:46:51,480 --> 00:46:53,190 Bruce is trying to penetrate me. 966 00:46:53,482 --> 00:46:56,444 I'm sorry, Bruce. All right, give me what you got. 967 00:46:56,736 --> 00:46:59,572 - I got nothing, ow. This is -what? 968 00:46:59,864 --> 00:47:02,158 - This is fucked up, man. -What? 969 00:47:02,450 --> 00:47:05,578 What the fuck is your problem? 970 00:47:05,870 --> 00:47:07,663 Two, three, okay. I gotta get it right... 971 00:47:07,955 --> 00:47:10,875 - Yep, yep, okay. -...In here. 972 00:47:11,167 --> 00:47:13,044 - Uh-huh. -Cassie? 973 00:47:13,336 --> 00:47:15,629 I don't know, I think one of us has to be lesbian to do this. 974 00:47:15,921 --> 00:47:17,506 Well, no, not if see here, 975 00:47:17,798 --> 00:47:19,091 if you're more like this... 976 00:47:19,383 --> 00:47:20,426 - Then... -Oh, I see. 977 00:47:20,718 --> 00:47:22,845 Yeah, no, we both have to be lesbian. 978 00:47:23,137 --> 00:47:24,847 -[Thump] Oh! -So that's not gonna work. 979 00:47:27,141 --> 00:47:29,018 Oh. 980 00:47:29,310 --> 00:47:32,563 There's no need to be shy, Otis. 981 00:47:32,855 --> 00:47:36,108 I for one am very interested in fornicating with you. 982 00:47:36,400 --> 00:47:38,486 Oh. [Chuckles] Well, uh, no, no, no. 983 00:47:38,778 --> 00:47:41,739 Uh, I'm just here for Anna, incase the baby pops. 984 00:47:42,031 --> 00:47:44,700 Surely there's better ways to pass the time. 985 00:47:44,992 --> 00:47:48,579 Oh, well, I'm gonna say thank you, but no thank you. 986 00:47:48,871 --> 00:47:50,706 Okay, I'm gonna level with you here, 987 00:47:50,998 --> 00:47:52,792 Anna told me that you got her pregnant without even trying. 988 00:47:53,084 --> 00:47:55,002 I need your baby batter, so be a neighbor. 989 00:47:55,294 --> 00:47:58,047 Well, I mean, my my semen isn't sugar, Heather. 990 00:47:58,339 --> 00:48:00,716 Besides, Anna and I have been having sex all day, all right? 991 00:48:01,008 --> 00:48:02,093 I'm exhausted. 992 00:48:02,385 --> 00:48:03,427 Even if I could get it up, 993 00:48:03,719 --> 00:48:06,389 it's like a ghost coughing down there. 994 00:48:10,601 --> 00:48:12,853 - Oh, my god. -Did you just...? 995 00:48:13,145 --> 00:48:14,397 No, no. I'm good. 996 00:48:14,688 --> 00:48:16,732 Uh... 997 00:48:17,024 --> 00:48:19,110 Okay, I think we can... 998 00:48:19,402 --> 00:48:21,195 Start with the actual sex now. 999 00:48:21,487 --> 00:48:22,530 - I'm... -Yeah? 1000 00:48:22,822 --> 00:48:23,948 - Yeah, I think I'm ready. -Okay. 1001 00:48:24,240 --> 00:48:25,866 - Yeah. -Whoa, hey, uh, I 1002 00:48:26,158 --> 00:48:28,994 - I felt the baby kick. -Well, don't make it weird. 1003 00:48:29,286 --> 00:48:30,704 She just wants to say hello. 1004 00:48:30,996 --> 00:48:32,415 - Don't you baby? -Please don’t talk like a baby. 1005 00:48:32,706 --> 00:48:34,291 She just wants to meet everybody. 1006 00:48:34,583 --> 00:48:36,669 Help her meet everybody, Adam. 1007 00:48:36,961 --> 00:48:38,337 I don't know that I'm qualified for that. 1008 00:48:38,629 --> 00:48:40,756 Shh-shh. Keep it sexy, okay? 1009 00:48:41,048 --> 00:48:43,092 Uh, if you if you arch your back, 1010 00:48:43,384 --> 00:48:46,512 I think it'll allow for at least another inch of penetration. 1011 00:48:46,804 --> 00:48:48,973 - Oh. -Thank you, Cassie. 1012 00:48:49,265 --> 00:48:51,350 [Water breaks] 1013 00:48:51,642 --> 00:48:52,852 Oh, my god. Oh, jeez. 1014 00:48:53,144 --> 00:48:55,980 Um, just for the record, I am not inside you right now. 1015 00:48:56,272 --> 00:48:58,566 [Gasping] 1016 00:48:58,858 --> 00:49:00,234 - It's... -Is this a good position? 1017 00:49:00,526 --> 00:49:02,611 It's just the water stage. 1018 00:49:02,903 --> 00:49:04,196 The baby's not gonna come for hours. 1019 00:49:04,488 --> 00:49:05,739 Water stage? 1020 00:49:09,285 --> 00:49:11,996 Ooh, ah. [Gasping] 1021 00:49:12,288 --> 00:49:13,456 Are are you are you having a seizure? 1022 00:49:13,747 --> 00:49:15,207 - What's... -[Otis] It's coming! 1023 00:49:15,499 --> 00:49:17,751 [Adam] Oh, my god. Are you having a contraction? 1024 00:49:18,043 --> 00:49:20,045 Oh, there it is! 1025 00:49:20,337 --> 00:49:21,505 - Okay, it's happening. -It's fine, it's fine. 1026 00:49:21,797 --> 00:49:22,882 - It's happening? -It's happening. 1027 00:49:23,174 --> 00:49:24,884 - We got a while yet. -No, no, no. 1028 00:49:25,176 --> 00:49:27,261 If we could get it wrapped up as soon as possible. If that's possible. 1029 00:49:27,553 --> 00:49:29,346 - Let's get her up. -This feels so fucking good. 1030 00:49:29,638 --> 00:49:31,348 Why don’t you ever feel this fucking good? 1031 00:49:31,640 --> 00:49:33,976 She doesn't mean that, guys. That's the baby talking. 1032 00:49:34,268 --> 00:49:36,395 Uh, can we get this guy off? This is my wife, here. 1033 00:49:36,687 --> 00:49:39,106 Just a little bit of help guys, would be really... 1034 00:49:39,398 --> 00:49:42,485 [Screams] 1035 00:49:42,776 --> 00:49:43,819 - Screamer. -[Screaming] 1036 00:49:44,111 --> 00:49:45,070 [Otis] Okay, there it is. 1037 00:49:45,362 --> 00:49:46,989 - There we go. -Never throw those out. 1038 00:49:47,281 --> 00:49:49,074 Uh, thank you so much, guys, thank you so much. 1039 00:49:49,366 --> 00:49:51,452 [Anna] See, what did I tell you about the plastic couch covers? 1040 00:49:51,744 --> 00:49:53,204 [Otis] What a great night guys. Thank you. 1041 00:49:53,496 --> 00:49:55,331 [Whimpering] 1042 00:49:57,541 --> 00:49:59,376 Can I ask a silly question? 1043 00:50:01,754 --> 00:50:03,964 How come none of you have realized 1044 00:50:04,256 --> 00:50:05,466 what a terrible idea this is? 1045 00:50:05,758 --> 00:50:07,676 Hmm? 1046 00:50:07,968 --> 00:50:12,556 I mean, for one night of awkward pleasure, 1047 00:50:12,848 --> 00:50:15,684 you are gonna jeopardize friendships, 1048 00:50:15,976 --> 00:50:19,230 marriages even... 1049 00:50:19,522 --> 00:50:23,359 Look around, these are your neighbors, your friends, 1050 00:50:23,651 --> 00:50:27,112 I just want to make sure that you've thought about this. 1051 00:50:27,404 --> 00:50:29,240 Really thought about it. 1052 00:50:29,532 --> 00:50:32,409 This is a small town. People are gonna find out. 1053 00:50:32,701 --> 00:50:34,995 One of you will talk, maybe not right away, 1054 00:50:35,287 --> 00:50:37,540 but eventually. 1055 00:50:37,831 --> 00:50:39,959 I read Cassie's article, 1056 00:50:40,251 --> 00:50:42,753 and the reason why it upset at everybody is 'cause she's right. 1057 00:50:43,045 --> 00:50:44,964 You are not the type of people 1058 00:50:45,256 --> 00:50:47,091 to do this sort of thing. 1059 00:50:48,801 --> 00:50:50,261 You're not adventurous. 1060 00:50:52,179 --> 00:50:54,348 Who are you trying to fool? 1061 00:51:11,198 --> 00:51:14,285 Half a dozen chimps are locked in a room. 1062 00:51:14,577 --> 00:51:16,161 And in the center of the room, 1063 00:51:16,453 --> 00:51:19,123 there's a ladder on top of which 1064 00:51:19,415 --> 00:51:21,375 a banana dangles from the ceiling. 1065 00:51:21,667 --> 00:51:24,211 So one the chimps decides to go for the banana. 1066 00:51:24,503 --> 00:51:27,089 But before he can even touch the ladder, 1067 00:51:27,381 --> 00:51:30,426 they're all sprayed with ice cold water. 1068 00:51:30,718 --> 00:51:33,512 - I'm so confused right now. -Shut up. 1069 00:51:33,804 --> 00:51:36,223 So, after a while, they figure out the connection, 1070 00:51:36,515 --> 00:51:37,766 between the ladder and the water, 1071 00:51:38,058 --> 00:51:40,853 and they don't go for the banana anymore. 1072 00:51:42,521 --> 00:51:46,859 So then one of the chimps is replaced by a new chimp. 1073 00:51:47,151 --> 00:51:50,195 And he decides to go for the banana. 1074 00:51:50,487 --> 00:51:51,780 Before he can even touch the ladder, 1075 00:51:52,072 --> 00:51:54,700 they they attack him. 1076 00:51:54,992 --> 00:51:57,161 He goes for it again and they literally, 1077 00:51:57,453 --> 00:52:00,372 they beat the message into him, 1078 00:52:00,664 --> 00:52:02,833 do not touch the fucking ladder. 1079 00:52:05,753 --> 00:52:09,381 Eventually, all the chimps are replaced by an entirely new group. 1080 00:52:10,841 --> 00:52:12,176 They don't know about the water. 1081 00:52:12,468 --> 00:52:14,970 They they don't even know it exists, 1082 00:52:15,262 --> 00:52:19,767 but anytime any of them go for that banana, 1083 00:52:20,059 --> 00:52:22,144 they attack them. 1084 00:52:22,436 --> 00:52:25,481 And they have no idea why. 1085 00:52:25,773 --> 00:52:27,358 All they know is, 1086 00:52:27,650 --> 00:52:30,486 this is what happens when you go after 1087 00:52:30,778 --> 00:52:32,946 the thing you want the most. 1088 00:52:34,615 --> 00:52:39,328 Something someone else says you can't have 1089 00:52:39,620 --> 00:52:41,246 and they never question it, 1090 00:52:41,538 --> 00:52:43,457 it's just what they do. 1091 00:52:43,749 --> 00:52:45,376 So my question is, 1092 00:52:45,668 --> 00:52:49,421 are you gonna go after your banana? 1093 00:52:49,713 --> 00:52:53,217 Or are you gonna let all the other chimps knock you down? 1094 00:52:54,927 --> 00:52:56,845 Did that make anyone else a little bit hard? 1095 00:52:57,137 --> 00:52:59,348 Bruce, there are ladies present. 1096 00:52:59,640 --> 00:53:02,976 I'm sorry, did it make anyone hard, or wet? 1097 00:53:03,268 --> 00:53:04,978 Look, y'all want this. 1098 00:53:07,690 --> 00:53:08,941 You need this. 1099 00:53:12,069 --> 00:53:14,822 And if you're in, then I'm in, too. 1100 00:53:16,323 --> 00:53:17,658 All the way. 1101 00:53:22,287 --> 00:53:25,624 - I'd like to go after my banana. -Me, too. 1102 00:53:25,916 --> 00:53:27,876 Can I put the whole thing in my mouth? 1103 00:53:29,002 --> 00:53:32,631 Saturday. My place. 1104 00:53:45,769 --> 00:53:47,479 Maybe they're late. 1105 00:53:51,567 --> 00:53:54,778 Why don’t you come on the cruise with me? 1106 00:53:55,070 --> 00:53:57,156 It'd be good for you to get out of town. 1107 00:53:57,448 --> 00:54:00,367 You don't need these people. 1108 00:54:00,659 --> 00:54:02,619 They've never accepted you. 1109 00:54:21,054 --> 00:54:22,806 [Sighs] Well. 1110 00:54:23,098 --> 00:54:24,892 Well, happy birthday, Seth. 1111 00:54:36,445 --> 00:54:37,446 Okay. 1112 00:54:39,239 --> 00:54:40,741 [Dial-up beeps] 1113 00:54:41,033 --> 00:54:44,203 Okay. 1114 00:54:44,495 --> 00:54:47,873 Okay. Pace yourself, Chester, buddy. 1115 00:54:48,165 --> 00:54:49,374 Pace. 1116 00:54:49,666 --> 00:54:51,710 Hello. You're very pretty. 1117 00:54:52,002 --> 00:54:53,253 I'm Chester. 1118 00:54:53,545 --> 00:54:56,507 Oh, slow down, slow down. 1119 00:54:56,799 --> 00:54:58,425 [Exhales] 1120 00:54:58,717 --> 00:55:02,971 Yeah, yeah, here comes the good stuff. 1121 00:55:03,263 --> 00:55:04,473 [Grunts] 1122 00:55:04,765 --> 00:55:07,518 Oh, oh, god dammit, why? 1123 00:55:07,810 --> 00:55:09,311 Why? 1124 00:55:09,603 --> 00:55:11,230 -[Knock on door] -Dude. 1125 00:55:11,522 --> 00:55:12,648 Ugh! 1126 00:55:12,940 --> 00:55:14,691 Everyone can fucking see you! 1127 00:55:14,983 --> 00:55:16,151 You know that that chick has a dick, right? 1128 00:55:16,443 --> 00:55:18,737 - Yeah, thanks. -I support masturbation. 1129 00:55:19,029 --> 00:55:20,823 -[Groans] -Whew! 1130 00:55:21,114 --> 00:55:22,825 [Sighs] 1131 00:55:23,116 --> 00:55:26,328 Hey, you're not you're not gonna mention this... 1132 00:55:26,620 --> 00:55:27,746 -[Coughs] -...To anyone are you? 1133 00:55:28,038 --> 00:55:30,415 'Cause I'm I'm a little just, 1134 00:55:30,707 --> 00:55:32,459 you know, embarrassed about it. 1135 00:55:32,751 --> 00:55:35,712 I would never do that. 1136 00:55:36,004 --> 00:55:38,131 No, I'm serious. Why would I go and tell anybody 1137 00:55:38,423 --> 00:55:40,050 that's private it's personal, that I walked in on you. 1138 00:55:40,342 --> 00:55:41,635 - It's totally fine. -Thank you. 1139 00:55:41,927 --> 00:55:43,720 Don't be embarrassed. I've done weird shit. 1140 00:55:44,012 --> 00:55:46,181 Like eat half a pizza. 1141 00:55:46,473 --> 00:55:48,642 [Chuckles] 1142 00:55:48,934 --> 00:55:52,855 Why don’t you have any friends, seriously? 1143 00:55:53,146 --> 00:55:55,774 Hum. Um... 1144 00:55:56,066 --> 00:55:57,901 Ow, that kinda [clicks tongue] 1145 00:55:58,193 --> 00:55:59,194 No. 1146 00:55:59,486 --> 00:56:00,737 I mean, what the fuck are you? 1147 00:56:01,029 --> 00:56:02,364 No, I didn't mean it like that, I meant like, 1148 00:56:02,656 --> 00:56:04,199 why don’t you have, like, friends, other than me? 1149 00:56:04,491 --> 00:56:06,159 Like, friends your your own age, 'cause you're 1150 00:56:06,451 --> 00:56:08,120 you're so, I mean, you... 1151 00:56:08,412 --> 00:56:09,997 I don't know. People are idiots. 1152 00:56:10,289 --> 00:56:12,165 - Generally. You're an idiot. -Yeah, I am an idiot. 1153 00:56:12,457 --> 00:56:13,750 Every you're just an idiot, at all times. 1154 00:56:14,042 --> 00:56:15,502 It's true. 1155 00:56:15,794 --> 00:56:18,255 I mean, you're only friends with me because you wanna bang me. 1156 00:56:18,547 --> 00:56:19,673 [Scoffs] Oh, fuck, holy shit. 1157 00:56:19,965 --> 00:56:22,009 It was a dream. It was a dream. 1158 00:56:22,301 --> 00:56:25,095 I had a sex dream about my aunt Merga, once. Okay? 1159 00:56:25,387 --> 00:56:26,889 You shouldn’t tell people that. 1160 00:56:27,180 --> 00:56:29,308 No, I'm making a I'm trying to make a point here. 1161 00:56:29,600 --> 00:56:32,603 All right, that it doesn't mean, it's nothing. 1162 00:56:32,895 --> 00:56:35,981 It's just a dream. Okay? 1163 00:56:36,273 --> 00:56:38,150 I mean, what's so wrong about me, anyway? 1164 00:56:38,442 --> 00:56:39,568 What? 1165 00:56:39,860 --> 00:56:41,278 I mean, why wouldn't you want to bang me? 1166 00:56:41,570 --> 00:56:42,863 You keep saying, "no I would never do that," 1167 00:56:43,155 --> 00:56:45,198 but I mean, do I, like, do I, am I repulsive? 1168 00:56:45,490 --> 00:56:47,868 Why would you wanna have sex with me? I mean, does that... 1169 00:56:48,160 --> 00:56:49,953 No, no, that's not what I said, I didn't say that. 1170 00:56:50,245 --> 00:56:51,413 Buyout didn't not say that, right? 1171 00:56:51,705 --> 00:56:53,248 - Okay. -You did not say that. 1172 00:56:53,540 --> 00:56:55,709 Wow. You should be a detective. 1173 00:56:56,001 --> 00:56:57,210 - Really? -Yeah. 1174 00:56:57,502 --> 00:56:59,379 - No. No. [Chuckles] -Why, you think I should 1175 00:56:59,671 --> 00:57:02,591 go get a badge or something? 1176 00:57:02,883 --> 00:57:05,385 I'll get you a detective badge. 1177 00:57:05,677 --> 00:57:07,763 - Thanks. -Hmm. 1178 00:57:08,055 --> 00:57:09,681 - What? -[Chuckles] 1179 00:57:15,979 --> 00:57:19,232 Whoa, what... what're you doing? 1180 00:57:19,524 --> 00:57:21,234 Oh, god. 1181 00:57:21,526 --> 00:57:23,904 What're you...? 1182 00:57:24,196 --> 00:57:25,822 What're you doing right now? 1183 00:57:26,114 --> 00:57:27,616 I'm bored. 1184 00:57:39,252 --> 00:57:40,671 What's happening right now? 1185 00:57:44,800 --> 00:57:49,304 Well, um, nothing is happening, Chester. 1186 00:57:51,723 --> 00:57:53,016 Oh, shit. 1187 00:57:53,308 --> 00:57:54,810 I'm sorry. 1188 00:57:55,102 --> 00:57:56,979 [Sighs] I just made it I made it really weird here. 1189 00:57:57,270 --> 00:57:59,982 I'm I I feel really stupid. 1190 00:58:00,273 --> 00:58:02,317 - Oh, you feel really stupid? -Yeah, I'm sorry. 1191 00:58:02,609 --> 00:58:04,653 That's how you feel right now? 1192 00:58:04,945 --> 00:58:06,029 Fuck you, Chester. 1193 00:58:08,657 --> 00:58:10,325 [Doorknob clicks, bell dings] 1194 00:58:10,617 --> 00:58:11,618 [Sighs] 1195 00:58:11,910 --> 00:58:15,789 [Music playing] 1196 00:58:16,081 --> 00:58:17,082 [Crying] 1197 00:58:22,462 --> 00:58:25,882 " You know I won't pretend " 1198 00:58:26,174 --> 00:58:29,428 " that this is not the end... " 1199 00:58:29,720 --> 00:58:33,974 " As long as you get what you want " 1200 00:58:36,560 --> 00:58:40,939 hey, it's Polly. 1201 00:58:41,231 --> 00:58:43,150 I'm coming to your orgy. 1202 00:58:43,442 --> 00:58:45,777 " For you " 1203 00:58:46,069 --> 00:58:49,948 " only you. " 1204 00:58:51,825 --> 00:58:53,368 Happy orgy day! 1205 00:58:53,660 --> 00:58:56,496 - Shh. -Right? 1206 00:58:56,788 --> 00:59:00,000 - And Chester... -Yes. 1207 00:59:00,292 --> 00:59:01,668 Hey, everyone. Hi. 1208 00:59:03,754 --> 00:59:05,922 Polly, you look, you look really nice. 1209 00:59:06,214 --> 00:59:09,301 Oh, do I? 1210 00:59:09,593 --> 00:59:10,886 Well, let's get started, shall we? 1211 00:59:11,178 --> 00:59:12,179 I call Cassie. 1212 00:59:12,471 --> 00:59:14,056 What? No. 1213 00:59:14,347 --> 00:59:15,724 Oh, come on, I'm really in the mood to have sex 1214 00:59:16,016 --> 00:59:17,142 with someone I've never been with before. 1215 00:59:17,434 --> 00:59:19,394 She said "no," you know? 1216 00:59:19,686 --> 00:59:21,772 Why don’t you just take another shot at Heather, there? 1217 00:59:22,064 --> 00:59:23,982 Hmm? 1218 00:59:24,274 --> 00:59:26,693 - What? -[Sighs] 1219 00:59:26,985 --> 00:59:29,196 In high school I put his penis in my mouth a little. 1220 00:59:29,488 --> 00:59:32,657 - Oh, jeez. -She didn't say I have a small penis. 1221 00:59:32,949 --> 00:59:34,576 - No, she kind of did. -Okay. 1222 00:59:34,868 --> 00:59:36,787 So those two are out, and I'm not really into Polly? 1223 00:59:37,079 --> 00:59:38,246 What the shit? 1224 00:59:38,538 --> 00:59:40,207 Do you want to have sex with me? 1225 00:59:40,499 --> 00:59:41,708 I don't feel comfortable answering that question. 1226 00:59:42,000 --> 00:59:43,502 Thank you very much. So Cassie and I then. 1227 00:59:43,794 --> 00:59:48,090 Well, I I wanna have sex, uh, with Spencer. 1228 00:59:48,381 --> 00:59:50,509 Are you serious? 1229 00:59:50,801 --> 00:59:52,469 Spencer's gay. 1230 00:59:52,761 --> 00:59:54,304 You're the only one in town who actually thinks that. 1231 00:59:54,596 --> 00:59:57,015 Oh, seriously? Really? 1232 00:59:57,307 --> 00:59:59,059 What about that fruity real estate job you have? 1233 00:59:59,351 --> 01:00:00,644 What about your hair? The clothes? 1234 01:00:00,936 --> 01:00:03,605 - That awesome Cologne? -I don't wear Cologne. 1235 01:00:03,897 --> 01:00:04,815 That's just me. 1236 01:00:05,107 --> 01:00:07,526 [Sighs] Okay. 1237 01:00:07,818 --> 01:00:09,152 Cassie wants to have sex with Spencer. 1238 01:00:09,444 --> 01:00:10,862 Who else wants to have sex with Spencer? 1239 01:00:11,154 --> 01:00:13,907 Oh, for fucks sake. Who are you sleeping with then? 1240 01:00:14,199 --> 01:00:16,576 - Adam. -No, I don’t think so. 1241 01:00:16,868 --> 01:00:17,911 Oh, guess what, Heather? 1242 01:00:18,203 --> 01:00:19,371 Cock-blocking isn't actually on the list 1243 01:00:19,663 --> 01:00:21,373 of things to do in an orgy. 1244 01:00:21,665 --> 01:00:24,126 So, why don’t you let Adam decide who he'd like to stick it in. 1245 01:00:24,417 --> 01:00:26,169 Oh, okay. Um... 1246 01:00:26,461 --> 01:00:30,132 You know, you're all wonderful people, 1247 01:00:30,423 --> 01:00:32,050 and um... 1248 01:00:32,342 --> 01:00:35,512 - Polly would be -awkward. 1249 01:00:35,804 --> 01:00:38,014 - And weird. -Okay. 1250 01:00:38,306 --> 01:00:41,017 You know, Alice, I think my main concern with you is that 1251 01:00:41,309 --> 01:00:43,937 I wouldn't be able to meet your level of experience. 1252 01:00:44,229 --> 01:00:47,190 Go fuck yourself. 1253 01:00:47,482 --> 01:00:52,279 So I guess I choose Cassie. 1254 01:00:52,571 --> 01:00:53,947 Too late, I already called dibs on her. 1255 01:00:54,239 --> 01:00:56,783 Okay, stop it. I'm... I'm not participating 1256 01:00:57,075 --> 01:00:58,618 in anything where dibs take precedence. 1257 01:00:58,910 --> 01:01:00,912 Have sex with me, please. 1258 01:01:01,204 --> 01:01:04,374 - I said no. -God, you are such a hypocrite, Cassie. 1259 01:01:04,666 --> 01:01:06,751 You, you, you, you run off with your vagina 1260 01:01:07,043 --> 01:01:08,461 and your your... sexy article things, 1261 01:01:08,753 --> 01:01:10,255 and then you have an issue sleeping with some 1262 01:01:10,547 --> 01:01:12,799 mildly-annoying person that you’ve known your entire life? 1263 01:01:13,091 --> 01:01:15,510 No, you do not get to be a prude, and the town slut, 1264 01:01:15,802 --> 01:01:17,762 you're having sex with Bruce, and that's that. 1265 01:01:18,054 --> 01:01:21,474 Jesus fucking Christ, Heather, she's not a slut, she's just a virgin. 1266 01:01:25,854 --> 01:01:29,065 [Laughter] Yeah... 1267 01:01:29,357 --> 01:01:31,193 Cassie's a virgin. 1268 01:01:31,484 --> 01:01:32,527 That would be rich. 1269 01:01:34,696 --> 01:01:38,867 But I everything that I know about sex is because of... 1270 01:01:39,159 --> 01:01:41,369 - Your column. -Yeah, me too. 1271 01:01:41,661 --> 01:01:45,207 This makes a lot of sense. 1272 01:01:45,498 --> 01:01:47,751 I'd like you all to leave now. 1273 01:01:48,043 --> 01:01:50,962 Okay. Okay, I'm sure this is extremely embarrassing for you, 1274 01:01:51,254 --> 01:01:55,342 but we've all been looking forward to this, so I think that we should 1275 01:01:55,634 --> 01:01:57,385 - get out. -We're having our carpets cleaned, 1276 01:01:57,677 --> 01:01:59,346 - there's nowhere else to go. -Get out! 1277 01:01:59,638 --> 01:02:02,682 - It's her house, you guys, just -shut up, Alice. 1278 01:02:02,974 --> 01:02:04,017 You get the fuck out first. 1279 01:02:19,407 --> 01:02:21,743 Alice. Hey, Alice. Alice, excuse me. 1280 01:02:22,035 --> 01:02:23,119 - Hey, hey, hey -don't. 1281 01:02:23,411 --> 01:02:24,496 What the fuck do you want, Bruce? 1282 01:02:24,788 --> 01:02:26,373 Hey, what the fuck were you doing in there? 1283 01:02:26,665 --> 01:02:27,916 You really ruined that for me in there. What're you doing? 1284 01:02:28,208 --> 01:02:29,834 I I could not give a baker's fuck. 1285 01:02:30,126 --> 01:02:32,212 A baker's fuck? What, 13 fucks what are you talking about? 1286 01:02:32,504 --> 01:02:37,342 - That's 13 fucks... -Do you have any idea how much I needed this? 1287 01:02:37,634 --> 01:02:40,345 First, you embarrass me by leaving me, 1288 01:02:40,637 --> 01:02:42,347 and then you rub it in my fucking face 1289 01:02:42,639 --> 01:02:44,349 by getting it on with every single guy in town. 1290 01:02:44,641 --> 01:02:45,850 You know, you 1291 01:02:46,142 --> 01:02:47,560 - you're embarrassing. -I'm embarrassing? 1292 01:02:47,852 --> 01:02:49,604 - Yeah. -You're pathetic. 1293 01:02:49,896 --> 01:02:51,439 - You need to sign our divorce papers. -You want pathetic? 1294 01:02:51,731 --> 01:02:54,943 No. Not until you tell me why. 1295 01:02:55,235 --> 01:02:56,653 Really? Do you really not know why? 1296 01:02:56,945 --> 01:02:57,988 Because, if I recall, 1297 01:02:58,280 --> 01:02:59,614 you didn’t touch me for like, a year. 1298 01:02:59,906 --> 01:03:02,158 And you're acting like a victim, in 1299 01:03:02,450 --> 01:03:05,203 - oh, what? 'Cause you're so innocent? -I had some sex. 1300 01:03:05,495 --> 01:03:07,414 - Some? -I may have over-compensated. 1301 01:03:07,706 --> 01:03:10,583 - Oh, yeah, you think? -You broke my heart! 1302 01:03:12,836 --> 01:03:14,379 My fucking heart! 1303 01:03:16,089 --> 01:03:17,090 Asshole. 1304 01:03:18,550 --> 01:03:20,343 [Gags] Sign the fucking papers. 1305 01:03:20,635 --> 01:03:22,304 It's the least you could do. 1306 01:03:28,310 --> 01:03:31,187 So, I have been thinking about the orgy... 1307 01:03:31,479 --> 01:03:32,397 The orgy's cancelled. 1308 01:03:32,689 --> 01:03:34,399 No, I'm Heather Mitchell, 1309 01:03:34,691 --> 01:03:36,568 - no one cancels a social event on me. -Heather. 1310 01:03:36,860 --> 01:03:40,488 Honey, please, will you just forget about the orgy and come to bed. 1311 01:03:40,780 --> 01:03:43,700 Adam, I am trying to figure out a way to keep this orgy going. 1312 01:03:43,992 --> 01:03:46,244 The last thing I have time for right now is to have sex with you. 1313 01:03:46,536 --> 01:03:47,620 Why is it so important to you? 1314 01:03:47,912 --> 01:03:49,914 To us, it's important to us. 1315 01:03:50,206 --> 01:03:51,624 No, it isn't. 1316 01:03:51,916 --> 01:03:53,626 I thought we were trying to have a baby, that's the goal. 1317 01:03:53,918 --> 01:03:56,004 And that is exactly why the orgy is so important. 1318 01:03:56,296 --> 01:03:58,173 What are you talking about? 1319 01:04:01,926 --> 01:04:02,844 Okay... 1320 01:04:04,721 --> 01:04:07,682 Look, I, um... 1321 01:04:07,974 --> 01:04:09,142 What? 1322 01:04:09,434 --> 01:04:12,270 I don't want you to take this the wrong way, but... 1323 01:04:12,562 --> 01:04:14,147 I had your sperm tested. 1324 01:04:16,441 --> 01:04:18,693 It's just we've been trying for a really long time, 1325 01:04:18,985 --> 01:04:21,029 and I got tested first, and everything was fine, 1326 01:04:21,321 --> 01:04:24,157 so, it was the next step. 1327 01:04:25,867 --> 01:04:26,826 What what do you mean? 1328 01:04:27,118 --> 01:04:28,078 I didn't give you any sperm. 1329 01:04:28,370 --> 01:04:29,412 How'd you get my sperm? 1330 01:04:31,164 --> 01:04:36,211 Well, when you make deposits, I make withdrawals. 1331 01:04:39,672 --> 01:04:40,715 You... 1332 01:04:44,302 --> 01:04:45,387 Oh, my god. 1333 01:04:45,678 --> 01:04:48,765 Uh... uh... 1334 01:04:49,057 --> 01:04:51,101 Okay. [Chuckles] 1335 01:04:52,811 --> 01:04:54,020 And... 1336 01:04:54,312 --> 01:04:55,855 They said that you have the worst sperm 1337 01:04:56,147 --> 01:04:57,482 that they’ve ever seen. 1338 01:04:57,774 --> 01:04:59,025 We can get a second opinion. 1339 01:04:59,317 --> 01:05:00,610 I got five. 1340 01:05:03,196 --> 01:05:04,656 [Sighs] 1341 01:05:04,948 --> 01:05:08,243 So you were using this orgy 1342 01:05:08,535 --> 01:05:10,286 as some sort of sperm bank? 1343 01:05:10,578 --> 01:05:11,996 That wasn’t the original plan. 1344 01:05:12,288 --> 01:05:14,082 You wanted to get pregnant, and then... 1345 01:05:14,374 --> 01:05:16,584 Trick me into raising the child with you 1346 01:05:16,876 --> 01:05:18,253 with complete disregard for the fact 1347 01:05:18,545 --> 01:05:19,546 the kid would look nothing like me. 1348 01:05:19,838 --> 01:05:21,339 I have to be a mother, Adam. Okay? 1349 01:05:21,631 --> 01:05:22,632 I mean, I wouldn't have married you if I 1350 01:05:22,924 --> 01:05:24,259 please, go on. 1351 01:05:24,551 --> 01:05:28,430 [Sighs] Honey, I'm just... I'm being emotional. 1352 01:05:28,721 --> 01:05:33,143 Oh, I would hate for Heather Mitchell to ever have an emotion. 1353 01:05:33,435 --> 01:05:35,687 I had to learn to love you. 1354 01:05:39,023 --> 01:05:41,568 - That came out wrong. -Did it? 1355 01:05:46,489 --> 01:05:49,033 - Okay. -[Sighs] 1356 01:06:06,593 --> 01:06:09,637 [Music playing] 1357 01:06:34,037 --> 01:06:35,663 You kept the tape? 1358 01:06:35,955 --> 01:06:40,668 Uh, just getting rid of the rest of my old junk before I leave. 1359 01:06:42,462 --> 01:06:44,130 [Sighs] So you're, you're going? 1360 01:06:44,422 --> 01:06:46,925 Well, the whole town found out my deepest, darkest, secret. 1361 01:06:47,217 --> 01:06:49,677 So, yeah, I'm gonna go. 1362 01:06:49,969 --> 01:06:51,804 Everybody has bad days apparently. 1363 01:06:52,096 --> 01:06:54,390 And mine's gonna get even worse until I leave this shit-hole. 1364 01:06:54,682 --> 01:06:56,184 So, if you'll excuse me. 1365 01:06:56,476 --> 01:06:58,520 What if you don't leave? 1366 01:06:58,811 --> 01:07:01,856 Well, then I'll have to stay. 1367 01:07:02,148 --> 01:07:05,318 And everybody knows I'm a fraud and a virgin, 1368 01:07:05,610 --> 01:07:08,905 and I can't look anybody in the eye ever again. 1369 01:07:09,197 --> 01:07:11,699 You're looking me in the eye right now. 1370 01:07:13,910 --> 01:07:16,913 You know, I'm pretty good at it. 1371 01:07:17,205 --> 01:07:18,456 Uh-huh. 1372 01:07:18,748 --> 01:07:20,917 [Sighs] 1373 01:07:21,209 --> 01:07:24,337 Look, um. 1374 01:07:24,629 --> 01:07:26,297 Cassie, when you left town the first time 1375 01:07:26,589 --> 01:07:30,468 it was the worst thing that ever happened to me. 1376 01:07:30,760 --> 01:07:33,596 I've never forgotten about you. I think about you all the time. 1377 01:07:33,888 --> 01:07:35,223 I mean, the only reason that I'm 1378 01:07:35,515 --> 01:07:36,724 the only reason I married Heather, 1379 01:07:37,016 --> 01:07:39,978 is, uh you know, I get it, okay? 1380 01:07:40,270 --> 01:07:41,688 I get it. You you had to do what you had to do. 1381 01:07:41,980 --> 01:07:43,064 You had to get out of town, 1382 01:07:43,356 --> 01:07:45,108 you had to leave us all behind. 1383 01:07:45,400 --> 01:07:48,319 You had to just go do your own thing and that's fine, okay? 1384 01:07:48,611 --> 01:07:50,029 I forgive you. 1385 01:07:52,532 --> 01:07:54,033 You forgive me? 1386 01:07:54,325 --> 01:07:57,161 Yeah. Yes, I forgive you. 1387 01:07:58,621 --> 01:08:00,290 You forgive me? 1388 01:08:00,582 --> 01:08:02,834 Do you have no idea why I didn't leave town 1389 01:08:03,126 --> 01:08:05,420 the second after that funeral? 1390 01:08:05,712 --> 01:08:07,505 It's because I thought you and your idiot friends 1391 01:08:07,797 --> 01:08:11,509 would be good material for a book, but you're not. 1392 01:08:11,801 --> 01:08:15,930 You're just a bunch of sad, boring, bumpkins, who were born here, 1393 01:08:16,222 --> 01:08:17,390 and will die here 1394 01:08:17,682 --> 01:08:19,601 and accomplish nothing in between. 1395 01:08:23,229 --> 01:08:24,439 [Sighs] 1396 01:08:27,108 --> 01:08:29,777 Does becoming a bitch count as an accomplishment? 1397 01:08:30,069 --> 01:08:33,990 [Snickers] Please leave. I have packing to do. 1398 01:08:34,282 --> 01:08:35,283 Yeah, I'm going thank you. 1399 01:08:37,577 --> 01:08:40,830 [Music playing] 1400 01:08:51,633 --> 01:08:54,552 - Tada! -What's that for? 1401 01:08:54,844 --> 01:08:56,512 - It's for you. -It's just weird. 1402 01:08:56,804 --> 01:08:58,765 You've never done that before. So... 1403 01:08:59,057 --> 01:09:01,059 Yeah, I thought it would be nice. 1404 01:09:01,351 --> 01:09:04,479 Okay. You know you don't owe me anything, right? 1405 01:09:04,771 --> 01:09:06,522 That I'm not some, like, little girl, 1406 01:09:06,814 --> 01:09:08,650 whose feelings have been hurt? 1407 01:09:10,902 --> 01:09:12,820 [Laughs] Relax, okay? It was... 1408 01:09:13,112 --> 01:09:15,114 It's just a muffin, okay? It's not even a good one. 1409 01:09:15,406 --> 01:09:16,991 I gave you the one that I dropped. 1410 01:09:21,537 --> 01:09:24,123 I put my notice in. 1411 01:09:25,458 --> 01:09:27,001 What? What are you talking about? 1412 01:09:27,293 --> 01:09:28,836 This town sucks, it's always sucked. 1413 01:09:29,128 --> 01:09:31,297 So... I am out of here. 1414 01:09:31,589 --> 01:09:33,508 I don't want to become like my cousin Heather. 1415 01:09:33,800 --> 01:09:36,177 You know, just settle for somebody just because they're there. 1416 01:09:36,469 --> 01:09:39,013 You should do the same. 1417 01:09:39,305 --> 01:09:40,723 Or not, I don't know. 1418 01:09:43,476 --> 01:09:45,395 It's not really fair for me to say it, I guess. 1419 01:09:45,687 --> 01:09:48,272 You do you. [Chuckles] 1420 01:09:48,564 --> 01:09:51,234 All I know is that leaving here scares the shit out of me, 1421 01:09:51,526 --> 01:09:53,611 and if you're scared of something, it's worth doing. 1422 01:09:53,903 --> 01:09:56,572 So, I am gonna do that. 1423 01:09:56,864 --> 01:10:00,118 Anyway, thank you for the dropped muffin. 1424 01:10:05,581 --> 01:10:07,625 [Music playing] 1425 01:10:14,215 --> 01:10:16,092 [Knocking at the door] 1426 01:10:16,384 --> 01:10:19,053 Jay MacMaster and his wife are gonna be delayed. 1427 01:10:19,345 --> 01:10:21,139 You're gonna have to get over this. 1428 01:10:21,431 --> 01:10:23,224 I feel like there's a hole inside of me, man. 1429 01:10:23,516 --> 01:10:28,104 Could I be perfectly frank with you right now? 1430 01:10:28,396 --> 01:10:30,314 - Of course. -Stop being such a little bitch 1431 01:10:30,606 --> 01:10:32,692 and do what you want. 1432 01:10:32,984 --> 01:10:35,903 I want to have the orgy. 1433 01:10:36,195 --> 01:10:39,824 - So, have the orgy. -I can't. 1434 01:10:40,116 --> 01:10:42,577 Cassie kicked everyone out. 1435 01:10:42,869 --> 01:10:44,912 So, how does that stop you? 1436 01:10:47,540 --> 01:10:49,417 If you have it, though, I wanna come. 1437 01:10:49,709 --> 01:10:51,461 No, you're not getting the commission on my house. 1438 01:10:51,753 --> 01:10:55,673 That's fine. I'm making a killing in this town. 1439 01:10:55,965 --> 01:10:58,801 Oh, god, if I didn't want to be you, I would hate you so much. 1440 01:10:59,093 --> 01:11:01,429 - What was that? -What? Nothing, I didn't 1441 01:11:01,721 --> 01:11:04,015 did you... 1442 01:11:04,307 --> 01:11:06,225 Okay. 1443 01:11:06,517 --> 01:11:09,020 [Music playing] 1444 01:11:13,691 --> 01:11:14,817 Jesus Christ. 1445 01:11:15,109 --> 01:11:16,277 I want to rent my own apartment. 1446 01:11:16,569 --> 01:11:18,446 Well, I'm a bit busy right now, okay, Seth? 1447 01:11:18,738 --> 01:11:20,990 I have to move out now before my mom gets back to town, or she won't let me. 1448 01:11:21,282 --> 01:11:23,034 Whatever. 1449 01:11:23,326 --> 01:11:26,954 But you’re in that house right now all by yourself? 1450 01:11:27,246 --> 01:11:28,915 Yeah, she gets back next week. 1451 01:11:29,207 --> 01:11:31,501 Do you want to have a party, Seth? 1452 01:11:31,793 --> 01:11:34,545 Why, so, so no one will show up? 1453 01:11:34,837 --> 01:11:37,465 - No thanks. -No, no, people will show up. I can promise you that. 1454 01:11:37,757 --> 01:11:41,260 - Like, girls? -Girls, totally. Tons of girls. 1455 01:11:41,552 --> 01:11:43,304 - Do they like video games? -Yeah, yeah. They love video games. 1456 01:11:43,596 --> 01:11:45,515 - Any thing you want, yeah. -Are they Japanese? 1457 01:11:45,807 --> 01:11:48,267 Sure, yeah. Yeah, Japanese girls, yeah, totally. 1458 01:11:48,559 --> 01:11:49,894 - Chinese girls. -No. 1459 01:11:50,186 --> 01:11:52,480 - Okay. -No Chinese. 1460 01:11:52,772 --> 01:11:55,274 Yeah, okay, no, no Chinese girls. 1461 01:11:59,779 --> 01:12:03,115 - Hey. -Bruce. 1462 01:12:03,407 --> 01:12:06,869 So, you still wanna do this thing? 1463 01:12:07,161 --> 01:12:08,329 Great okay, cool. 1464 01:12:08,621 --> 01:12:10,832 Maybe, maybe lose the pajamas, get more cleavage, 1465 01:12:11,123 --> 01:12:12,416 like, sexy, cleavage. 1466 01:12:13,876 --> 01:12:15,002 Like, right now. 1467 01:12:18,130 --> 01:12:21,092 Hi, so I think we found a way to keep the orgy going. 1468 01:12:21,384 --> 01:12:25,012 - I don't know. -[Phone ringing] 1469 01:12:25,304 --> 01:12:27,682 Vintage vinyl, all sale's final. This is Chester. 1470 01:12:27,974 --> 01:12:29,892 It's back on. Seth's place. 1471 01:12:30,184 --> 01:12:32,687 - Tonight. -Ding-dong. 1472 01:12:32,979 --> 01:12:35,064 Ding, ding, I'll be there. 1473 01:12:35,356 --> 01:12:37,441 Good afternoon, mayor. 1474 01:12:37,733 --> 01:12:39,235 Nice to see you, Heather. 1475 01:12:39,527 --> 01:12:41,237 So, there's no delicate way to put this, 1476 01:12:41,529 --> 01:12:42,905 so I'm just gonna come right out with it. 1477 01:12:43,197 --> 01:12:44,574 We're having an orgy this evening, 1478 01:12:44,866 --> 01:12:46,242 and we could use some additional penises, 1479 01:12:46,534 --> 01:12:48,452 if you would care to attend? 1480 01:12:48,744 --> 01:12:49,745 Oh, absolutely. 1481 01:12:50,037 --> 01:12:52,164 Do you guys have your own anal beads, or... 1482 01:12:52,456 --> 01:12:55,167 Is this more of a BYOAB kind of thing? 1483 01:12:57,587 --> 01:12:59,046 " If it feels good, do it " 1484 01:12:59,338 --> 01:13:01,090 " even if you shouldn't " 1485 01:13:01,382 --> 01:13:04,010 " don't let people mess you around " 1486 01:13:04,302 --> 01:13:07,054 " it feels good do it, even if you shouldn't... " 1487 01:13:07,346 --> 01:13:10,349 So, where shall we fornicate, Bruce? 1488 01:13:17,857 --> 01:13:19,775 Yeah! 1489 01:13:51,682 --> 01:13:53,476 - Cocktail? -No, no thanks. 1490 01:13:53,768 --> 01:13:55,102 Boys? 1491 01:14:01,359 --> 01:14:03,110 There's my guy. 1492 01:14:03,402 --> 01:14:04,487 - Hey -hey. 1493 01:14:04,779 --> 01:14:06,864 I'm so glad that you could make it. 1494 01:14:07,156 --> 01:14:08,282 I'm really glad I could come. 1495 01:14:08,574 --> 01:14:09,825 I'm even happier when you do. 1496 01:14:10,117 --> 01:14:11,243 -[Gags drink] -Are you okay? 1497 01:14:11,535 --> 01:14:12,495 - Got a little... -Yeah, I'm good. 1498 01:14:14,997 --> 01:14:16,874 Why is my living room like a whore dungeon? 1499 01:14:17,166 --> 01:14:20,086 What are you guys doing with my mom's pashminas? 1500 01:14:20,378 --> 01:14:22,797 - She loves those. -For the orgy. 1501 01:14:23,089 --> 01:14:25,007 What orgy? This is a party. 1502 01:14:25,299 --> 01:14:26,592 Yeah, yeah, it's a party. 1503 01:14:26,884 --> 01:14:27,969 It's a party for your penis, bro. 1504 01:14:28,260 --> 01:14:30,054 I don't want a penis party for my penis. 1505 01:14:30,346 --> 01:14:32,974 I want a party party for me. 1506 01:14:35,476 --> 01:14:36,602 Hey, where you going? 1507 01:14:36,894 --> 01:14:38,896 I'm gonna go play some video games. 1508 01:14:39,188 --> 01:14:40,898 Does anybody want to play with me? 1509 01:14:41,190 --> 01:14:43,526 No, maybe later, man. Maybe later. 1510 01:15:00,251 --> 01:15:03,587 So, do you wanna go somewhere? 1511 01:15:03,879 --> 01:15:06,716 [Indistinct] 1512 01:15:07,008 --> 01:15:09,760 It doesn't bother me at all that you ejaculated quickly. 1513 01:15:10,052 --> 01:15:13,931 That is a sign of a man who has his priorities straight. 1514 01:15:14,223 --> 01:15:15,433 But there is something else that... 1515 01:15:15,725 --> 01:15:18,894 Why don’t you finish that drink? 1516 01:15:19,186 --> 01:15:21,689 - For you... -Yeah? 1517 01:15:21,981 --> 01:15:23,065 That might tickle your fantasy... 1518 01:15:23,357 --> 01:15:27,278 Oh, and there it is. Okay. 1519 01:15:27,570 --> 01:15:29,196 Polly, can I can I talk to you, please? 1520 01:15:29,488 --> 01:15:31,198 Guess what? I want you to know that I think that you're kind of... 1521 01:15:31,490 --> 01:15:33,492 We're sort of in the middle of something here, sport. 1522 01:15:33,784 --> 01:15:36,078 Uh, yeah, give me a second, okay, Spencer? 1523 01:15:36,370 --> 01:15:40,458 I just want you to know that I think you're really beautiful. 1524 01:15:40,750 --> 01:15:44,253 And that I just I think you're fucking amazing. 1525 01:15:44,545 --> 01:15:47,590 I I screwed up the other night, okay? 1526 01:15:47,882 --> 01:15:49,341 It's fine. You know what, Chester, 1527 01:15:49,633 --> 01:15:50,926 it was, it really was nothing. 1528 01:15:51,218 --> 01:15:55,264 No. It's not fine. Okay, and it wasn't nothing. 1529 01:15:55,556 --> 01:15:57,433 And you weren't bored. 1530 01:15:57,725 --> 01:16:00,811 This is worth doing. 1531 01:16:01,103 --> 01:16:04,607 Yeah? How do you know? 1532 01:16:04,899 --> 01:16:07,193 'Cause I'm scared shitless. 1533 01:16:09,737 --> 01:16:14,366 Whoa, I declare this orgy officially... 1534 01:16:14,658 --> 01:16:16,827 Begun! Yeah! 1535 01:16:22,416 --> 01:16:24,418 - Adam. -Do you know where Cassie is? 1536 01:16:24,710 --> 01:16:27,213 - No. -I think she left town. 1537 01:16:27,505 --> 01:16:29,882 - Without saying, goodbye? -Wouldn't she? 1538 01:16:30,174 --> 01:16:32,426 Bitch. 1539 01:16:32,718 --> 01:16:34,720 Guess you don't want to go to Seth's either? 1540 01:16:35,012 --> 01:16:36,013 What at I was at Seth's. 1541 01:16:36,305 --> 01:16:37,723 What do you think? 1542 01:16:38,015 --> 01:16:39,767 Really? 1543 01:16:40,059 --> 01:16:42,019 Heather was the one that told me... 1544 01:16:42,311 --> 01:16:43,521 How do you not know about this? 1545 01:16:43,813 --> 01:16:44,939 [Exhales] 1546 01:16:48,484 --> 01:16:50,444 I want you inside of me right now. 1547 01:16:54,240 --> 01:16:56,242 - Come here. -Things are progressing nicely. 1548 01:16:59,078 --> 01:17:01,247 Oh, this is my cue. 1549 01:17:01,539 --> 01:17:03,749 Yeah, yeah, yeah. What, yeah, 1550 01:17:04,041 --> 01:17:07,753 take this off. Yeah, just, yeah, yeah, whatever. 1551 01:17:08,045 --> 01:17:09,922 Yeah, now we're better. 1552 01:17:10,214 --> 01:17:11,423 [Moaning] 1553 01:17:11,715 --> 01:17:13,217 Yeah. 1554 01:17:15,469 --> 01:17:18,013 Come on, guys. Come on, let's ease up on the kissing. 1555 01:17:18,305 --> 01:17:20,307 Come on, guys, let's use our mouths 1556 01:17:20,599 --> 01:17:21,976 for the greater good here. 1557 01:17:22,268 --> 01:17:24,019 [Whispers] Bruce. 1558 01:17:24,311 --> 01:17:25,271 Oh, yeah. 1559 01:17:25,563 --> 01:17:27,606 - Oh, yeah. -Bruce! 1560 01:17:27,898 --> 01:17:30,067 What? What? It's a goddamn fucking orgy. 1561 01:17:30,359 --> 01:17:32,111 If you've got a hole and you're not using it, then you're being selfish. 1562 01:17:32,403 --> 01:17:33,487 Clearly, they're having a moment. 1563 01:17:33,779 --> 01:17:35,406 Well if they're having a fucking moment, 1564 01:17:35,698 --> 01:17:37,408 then they should take this fucking romantic moment to a room. 1565 01:17:37,700 --> 01:17:39,326 Yeah, come on. Room. Room. 1566 01:17:39,618 --> 01:17:40,995 No, no, I didn't mean it. I didn't actually 1567 01:17:41,287 --> 01:17:42,454 I was just just saying it! I was just just saying it, 1568 01:17:42,746 --> 01:17:43,497 like, in the heat of the moment. 1569 01:17:43,789 --> 01:17:45,082 It wasn't sexy ow, fuck! 1570 01:17:47,668 --> 01:17:49,503 [Phone vibrates] 1571 01:17:54,466 --> 01:17:56,802 - Hello? -Hey. 1572 01:17:57,094 --> 01:17:58,804 You left without saying, "goodbye"? 1573 01:17:59,096 --> 01:18:00,806 Fuck you, Judas. 1574 01:18:01,098 --> 01:18:03,559 Are you kidding? I saved you. 1575 01:18:03,851 --> 01:18:06,437 From losing your virginity to fucking Bruce. 1576 01:18:06,729 --> 01:18:09,565 You would really, really want to hold that against me? 1577 01:18:09,857 --> 01:18:11,483 I trusted you with that. 1578 01:18:11,775 --> 01:18:13,402 You know how hard it is for me to trust people? 1579 01:18:13,694 --> 01:18:16,030 Yeah, sorry. You should just get the fuck over it. 1580 01:18:16,322 --> 01:18:19,116 - When did you leave? -Just now. 1581 01:18:19,408 --> 01:18:21,035 Okay, come back. 1582 01:18:21,327 --> 01:18:23,162 I can't. I'm on the lam. 1583 01:18:23,454 --> 01:18:25,039 The book people are gonna come after me. 1584 01:18:25,331 --> 01:18:26,874 My career's over, life's over 1585 01:18:27,166 --> 01:18:29,210 why don’t you just write a book? 1586 01:18:29,501 --> 01:18:30,836 Yeah, what am I supposed to write about? 1587 01:18:31,128 --> 01:18:34,131 A a virgin who plans an orgy for a bunch of prudes? 1588 01:18:34,423 --> 01:18:35,507 And then out myself 1589 01:18:35,799 --> 01:18:37,843 to the entire world in the process? 1590 01:18:39,762 --> 01:18:41,764 That's not bad, actually. 1591 01:18:42,056 --> 01:18:44,558 You said your careers over anyway, so it saves you 1592 01:18:44,850 --> 01:18:46,977 from having to remember a bunch of bullshit lies 1593 01:18:47,269 --> 01:18:48,229 all the time. 1594 01:18:49,730 --> 01:18:51,523 These people don't want me here. 1595 01:18:51,815 --> 01:18:53,734 Adam just came looking for you. 1596 01:18:54,026 --> 01:18:55,653 Yeah, I saw him last night. 1597 01:18:55,945 --> 01:19:00,366 You did? So, you know about him and Heather? 1598 01:19:00,658 --> 01:19:03,035 What about him and Heather? 1599 01:19:03,327 --> 01:19:05,246 " " " [Rap music] 1600 01:19:09,792 --> 01:19:11,252 Stop the orgy! 1601 01:19:29,853 --> 01:19:31,522 Heather? 1602 01:19:31,814 --> 01:19:35,401 - Do you have something you want to say? -No. 1603 01:19:35,693 --> 01:19:37,778 How nice of you to join us. 1604 01:19:38,070 --> 01:19:39,363 Are you gonna tell them, or should I? 1605 01:19:41,323 --> 01:19:42,616 What's going on, here? 1606 01:19:42,908 --> 01:19:44,368 My money's on gonorrhea. 1607 01:19:44,660 --> 01:19:47,579 Gentlemen, the uh, the only reason 1608 01:19:47,871 --> 01:19:50,708 that Heather wants to sleep with you, 1609 01:19:51,000 --> 01:19:53,335 the only reason that this whole thing is happening in the first place, 1610 01:19:53,627 --> 01:19:55,754 is because Heather Murray, 1611 01:19:56,046 --> 01:19:58,173 is trying to get pregnant. 1612 01:19:58,465 --> 01:20:01,135 And she doesn't want your DNA in the mix. Yeah, I get that. 1613 01:20:01,427 --> 01:20:03,470 No, not that’s not what I'm saying. 1614 01:20:03,762 --> 01:20:07,099 First of all, I have dead sperm, apparently, okay? 1615 01:20:07,391 --> 01:20:09,560 That's not the point is, this whole thing 1616 01:20:09,852 --> 01:20:11,145 is based on a lie. All right? 1617 01:20:11,437 --> 01:20:14,356 And Cassie who we slut-shamed out of town years ago, 1618 01:20:14,648 --> 01:20:16,859 now, she's leaving town again because she's a virgin? 1619 01:20:17,151 --> 01:20:18,736 Huh? How does that make sense? 1620 01:20:19,028 --> 01:20:21,238 And, and what, we're doing this to prove that we're not prudes? 1621 01:20:21,530 --> 01:20:24,033 You know what? I'm a prude, okay? I am. 1622 01:20:24,325 --> 01:20:25,701 I don't I don't wanna have sex in front of anybody. 1623 01:20:25,993 --> 01:20:27,536 I want it to be me and one other person. 1624 01:20:27,828 --> 01:20:30,914 Nobody watching, no no toys, no lubes. 1625 01:20:31,206 --> 01:20:33,584 Just vanilla. That's me, I'm vanilla. 1626 01:20:33,876 --> 01:20:35,586 As for the rest of you I mean I don't even know 1627 01:20:35,878 --> 01:20:38,047 how you could have sex in front of look at this. 1628 01:20:38,339 --> 01:20:40,591 You know how much confidence it takes to lay naked like that on somebody's couch? 1629 01:20:40,883 --> 01:20:43,177 - You ever been in this house before? -Yeah, never. 1630 01:20:43,469 --> 01:20:45,471 And yet it's like he lives here. 1631 01:20:45,763 --> 01:20:49,016 Good for you. Buyout know what? Be yourself, all right? 1632 01:20:49,308 --> 01:20:51,101 Everybody just be themselves and be honest. 1633 01:20:51,393 --> 01:20:53,270 Is this all true, Heather? 1634 01:20:53,562 --> 01:20:55,939 You want us to impregnate you? 1635 01:20:56,231 --> 01:20:58,150 Nobody ever has to know. 1636 01:20:58,442 --> 01:20:59,443 [Sighs] 1637 01:20:59,735 --> 01:21:02,488 All I've ever wanted was to be a mother. 1638 01:21:02,780 --> 01:21:05,949 And they say that it takes a village to raise a child 1639 01:21:06,241 --> 01:21:10,329 - I'm down with it,shh-sh... -Me too. 1640 01:21:10,621 --> 01:21:13,374 Would we have to help raise the kid? 1641 01:21:13,665 --> 01:21:15,376 No I just need your sperm. 1642 01:21:16,543 --> 01:21:17,378 Don't care. 1643 01:21:19,421 --> 01:21:21,840 Do that you gotta do. 1644 01:21:22,132 --> 01:21:24,551 But I'm... I'm out. 1645 01:21:31,266 --> 01:21:32,393 - So, who's first? -Me. 1646 01:21:32,684 --> 01:21:34,686 - How about you go third? -What? Oh, come on! 1647 01:21:34,978 --> 01:21:36,397 Gus is gonna go before me? 1648 01:21:36,688 --> 01:21:38,107 You don't want to have a Samoan baby. 1649 01:21:38,399 --> 01:21:41,610 [Gus] How is it that no one in this town knows what I am? 1650 01:21:41,902 --> 01:21:43,862 - I'm Indian. -No, you're not. 1651 01:21:44,154 --> 01:21:46,281 Dot, not feather. 1652 01:21:46,573 --> 01:21:49,284 Actually, you people make really beautiful mixed babies. 1653 01:21:49,576 --> 01:21:50,869 - I'm first. -Okay. 1654 01:21:51,161 --> 01:21:52,579 Oh, okay. All right, yes. 1655 01:21:52,871 --> 01:21:55,582 Here we go, let's do this. Let's do this, here we go 1656 01:21:55,874 --> 01:21:58,877 - what? -Nothing, I thought you’d be smaller. 1657 01:22:07,052 --> 01:22:08,720 [Woman moaning] 1658 01:22:29,116 --> 01:22:30,868 [Gasping] 1659 01:22:31,160 --> 01:22:32,786 How do you do that? 1660 01:22:33,078 --> 01:22:35,956 Your tongue, it's like an Olympic athlete. 1661 01:22:38,542 --> 01:22:41,253 I'm gonna give you this ice cream on a cone. 1662 01:22:41,545 --> 01:22:44,923 [Sighs] And what flavor am I? 1663 01:22:45,215 --> 01:22:46,842 Tiger tale. 1664 01:22:47,134 --> 01:22:50,387 No, tiger tale is disgusting. 1665 01:22:50,679 --> 01:22:52,431 Do my lady bits taste like black licorice? 1666 01:22:52,723 --> 01:22:54,850 [Muffled] I love black licorice. 1667 01:22:55,142 --> 01:22:55,851 [Moans] 1668 01:23:22,503 --> 01:23:23,962 Oh, god. 1669 01:23:29,092 --> 01:23:30,719 Cassie. 1670 01:23:31,011 --> 01:23:34,932 Oh my god, I'm so glad you came back. 1671 01:23:36,934 --> 01:23:38,852 There's so much stuff I wanna say about last night, 1672 01:23:39,144 --> 01:23:41,688 I shouldn't have okay... 1673 01:23:41,980 --> 01:23:45,067 - If you wanna talk first, that's fine, too. -Fuck you. 1674 01:23:45,359 --> 01:23:48,487 God, I've been wanting to do that for so long. 1675 01:23:48,779 --> 01:23:51,031 I mean, if this is part of some sort of, uh, big-city foreplay 1676 01:23:51,323 --> 01:23:52,616 I'm you're gonna have to walk me through. 1677 01:23:52,908 --> 01:23:54,034 [Groans] 1678 01:24:00,082 --> 01:24:02,417 [Woman moaning] 1679 01:24:11,093 --> 01:24:12,970 There's a musk. 1680 01:24:13,262 --> 01:24:14,221 [Moaning] 1681 01:24:31,572 --> 01:24:33,073 [Video game beeping] 1682 01:24:50,632 --> 01:24:52,759 So, have you fucked anyone, yet? 1683 01:24:53,051 --> 01:24:55,971 - No. -Okay. 1684 01:24:56,263 --> 01:25:00,517 Well, where should we do this? 1685 01:25:00,809 --> 01:25:02,060 Do what? 1686 01:25:02,352 --> 01:25:04,605 The sex. We're going to bang. 1687 01:25:04,896 --> 01:25:07,065 That's okay. 1688 01:25:09,901 --> 01:25:14,615 I'm offering you farm-fresh, free range, 1689 01:25:14,906 --> 01:25:17,200 grade a pussy here. 1690 01:25:17,492 --> 01:25:20,037 Yeah, you don't have to do that. I'm fine. 1691 01:25:20,329 --> 01:25:23,290 Fine? What what is this? What is this? 1692 01:25:23,582 --> 01:25:26,752 What's your deal? Are you not attracted to me? 1693 01:25:31,423 --> 01:25:32,799 You're okay. 1694 01:25:36,470 --> 01:25:38,847 I'm sorry, what sort of bar 1695 01:25:39,139 --> 01:25:41,266 are we comparing me to, porn stars? 1696 01:25:41,558 --> 01:25:44,478 - Mostly, yeah. -Mm-hmm. 1697 01:25:44,770 --> 01:25:47,064 I hate to tell you this, sweetie, but, 1698 01:25:47,356 --> 01:25:51,526 those women aren't actually real. 1699 01:25:51,818 --> 01:25:53,612 What's so real about you? 1700 01:25:56,948 --> 01:25:58,700 That's it. It's on. 1701 01:25:58,992 --> 01:26:01,036 - Oh, fuck. This is so nice. -[Moaning] 1702 01:26:01,328 --> 01:26:04,206 - This is just so nice. -Oh, I'm not gonna make it, I'm not gonna make it. 1703 01:26:04,498 --> 01:26:07,751 - Not gonna make it. -Okay. Okay, 218 x 4 million. 1704 01:26:08,043 --> 01:26:09,419 What? I don't understand that. 1705 01:26:09,711 --> 01:26:11,338 - Just focus. Add. -Focus on what? 1706 01:26:11,630 --> 01:26:13,548 [Woman moaning] 1707 01:26:21,306 --> 01:26:23,266 You know what my dad used to say, 1708 01:26:23,558 --> 01:26:25,686 "life gives you lemons, you make lemonade." 1709 01:26:25,977 --> 01:26:28,021 Absolutely, bro. 1710 01:26:28,313 --> 01:26:29,940 A whole jug of it. 1711 01:26:31,983 --> 01:26:34,945 - So, that's that, then. -Yeah, that's that. 1712 01:26:35,237 --> 01:26:39,658 -[Moaning continues] -That's what's what? 1713 01:26:39,950 --> 01:26:41,743 Let's make some lemonade. 1714 01:26:44,413 --> 01:26:48,041 Yeah, absolutely. Sure. 1715 01:26:48,333 --> 01:26:52,504 So, what what's happening? 1716 01:26:52,796 --> 01:26:55,632 If you got a hole, and you're not using it... 1717 01:26:59,761 --> 01:27:01,138 [Video game music playing] 1718 01:27:09,312 --> 01:27:11,606 [Gasps] 1719 01:27:16,862 --> 01:27:18,196 [Boing sound] 1720 01:27:22,325 --> 01:27:26,621 - Does that hurt? -The piercing, no. 1721 01:27:26,913 --> 01:27:28,290 It's good. 1722 01:27:28,582 --> 01:27:29,541 You sure it doesn't hurt? 1723 01:27:29,833 --> 01:27:34,629 - Mm-hmm. Whoa! -Oh, ah! 1724 01:27:34,921 --> 01:27:38,633 - Can we just play video games now? -Yeah, absolutely, we can. 1725 01:27:41,094 --> 01:27:43,138 [Sighs] 1726 01:27:43,430 --> 01:27:45,849 How is it? 1727 01:27:46,141 --> 01:27:47,559 [Groans] 1728 01:27:47,851 --> 01:27:50,061 Well, the stinging has subsided, 1729 01:27:50,353 --> 01:27:52,856 so that's something. 1730 01:27:53,148 --> 01:27:55,567 I'm sorry. 1731 01:27:55,859 --> 01:27:57,986 I just really had to hurt you. 1732 01:27:58,278 --> 01:28:01,990 Oh. Well, mission accomplished. 1733 01:28:05,076 --> 01:28:06,661 Do you know why I was afraid 1734 01:28:06,953 --> 01:28:08,455 to come back here? 1735 01:28:11,124 --> 01:28:15,045 Because I didn't want to see you happy. 1736 01:28:17,172 --> 01:28:19,633 Well, you sure fixed your wish with that one. 1737 01:28:23,720 --> 01:28:25,847 What about you? 1738 01:28:26,139 --> 01:28:27,849 Are you happy? 1739 01:28:29,017 --> 01:28:32,103 I'm tired. 1740 01:28:32,395 --> 01:28:33,355 All that stuff I said last night 1741 01:28:33,647 --> 01:28:35,524 about forgiving you, that was shitty. 1742 01:28:37,192 --> 01:28:38,318 It's not your fault 1743 01:28:38,610 --> 01:28:40,028 that I married Heather, or I stayed in town, 1744 01:28:40,320 --> 01:28:42,864 it's got nothing to do with you. 1745 01:28:46,284 --> 01:28:48,036 I'm the reason that nothing happened 1746 01:28:48,328 --> 01:28:50,247 between us. 1747 01:28:52,290 --> 01:28:55,710 I guess I should be asking you for forgiveness. 1748 01:28:56,878 --> 01:28:58,296 So... 1749 01:28:59,506 --> 01:29:01,049 I'm sorry. 1750 01:29:02,884 --> 01:29:04,886 That's what I was gonna say before you... 1751 01:29:05,178 --> 01:29:07,514 Slapped me in the face and kneed me in the balls. 1752 01:29:07,806 --> 01:29:11,685 I'm sorry, for, um... 1753 01:29:11,977 --> 01:29:13,103 All of it. 1754 01:29:17,440 --> 01:29:19,234 How's your balls? 1755 01:29:19,526 --> 01:29:22,654 Mmm. Still intact, I guess. 1756 01:29:22,946 --> 01:29:26,491 It's not like I'm gonna be using them for anything. 1757 01:29:26,783 --> 01:29:27,617 Ever. 1758 01:29:30,704 --> 01:29:31,872 Can I see? 1759 01:29:33,790 --> 01:29:37,085 It's not really my best feature. 1760 01:29:37,377 --> 01:29:39,588 [Chuckles] Oh. 1761 01:29:41,756 --> 01:29:46,303 You know, it doesn't feel that useless to me. 1762 01:29:49,055 --> 01:29:51,391 Cassie, I... 1763 01:29:51,683 --> 01:29:52,642 Yeah? 1764 01:30:10,869 --> 01:30:12,913 [Chuckling] 1765 01:30:17,584 --> 01:30:19,044 [Sighs] Did you get some lube? 1766 01:30:19,336 --> 01:30:20,545 All I could find was some apple butter. 1767 01:30:20,837 --> 01:30:22,297 Yeah, sure, fine. Fuck it. Whatever. 1768 01:30:22,589 --> 01:30:23,673 -[Sighs] -We don't have to do this. 1769 01:30:23,965 --> 01:30:25,467 No, we're gonna do this, come on, come on. 1770 01:30:25,759 --> 01:30:27,385 - Let's just do this, all right? -Yup. Here we go. 1771 01:30:27,677 --> 01:30:28,970 Oh, whoa, hey, what are you doing there, 1772 01:30:29,262 --> 01:30:31,181 - captain? -You need to be erect. 1773 01:30:31,473 --> 01:30:34,434 I can get myself erect, thank you very much. 1774 01:30:34,726 --> 01:30:36,770 - Be my guest. Mm-hmm. -Yeah, watch this. 1775 01:30:37,062 --> 01:30:38,438 Geez. 1776 01:30:38,730 --> 01:30:39,773 Oh, look at that. 1777 01:30:40,065 --> 01:30:41,942 -[Moaning] -Oh, fuck. 1778 01:30:42,233 --> 01:30:45,362 Uh, Auschwitz. Uh, uh, Dachau, Dachau. 1779 01:30:45,654 --> 01:30:49,324 - Uh, Bergen-Belsen. Uh, Terezin. Uh -wait, what? 1780 01:30:49,616 --> 01:30:51,326 - What are you saying? What? -Those are [muttering] 1781 01:30:51,618 --> 01:30:54,162 ...concentration camps. From the holocaust. 1782 01:30:55,914 --> 01:30:58,583 Why? Is that too dark? Too much? 1783 01:30:58,875 --> 01:31:00,961 - Yeah, it's a little much. -Okay. 1784 01:31:01,252 --> 01:31:02,712 [Game console beeping] 1785 01:31:04,339 --> 01:31:06,341 [Groans] What is the appeal, here? 1786 01:31:06,633 --> 01:31:09,427 I mean, you just die and then you do it all over again. 1787 01:31:09,719 --> 01:31:10,470 Yeah. 1788 01:31:10,762 --> 01:31:12,347 That's what I like about it. 1789 01:31:12,639 --> 01:31:13,473 When Mario dies, 1790 01:31:13,765 --> 01:31:15,016 he doesn't rage against the world, 1791 01:31:15,308 --> 01:31:17,519 he just picks himself up, 1792 01:31:17,811 --> 01:31:19,646 goes back to the start and tries again, 1793 01:31:19,938 --> 01:31:23,692 until he figures out how to save the Princess. 1794 01:31:29,698 --> 01:31:31,074 Seth? 1795 01:31:33,326 --> 01:31:35,078 What's your plan? 1796 01:31:35,370 --> 01:31:37,789 I mean, you can't really just stay in your mother's basement 1797 01:31:38,081 --> 01:31:41,167 and play video games for the rest of your life. 1798 01:31:41,459 --> 01:31:42,961 What other life am I gonna have? 1799 01:31:43,253 --> 01:31:44,671 I'm the town loser. 1800 01:31:44,963 --> 01:31:48,216 Well, to the town, yeah. 1801 01:31:48,508 --> 01:31:50,927 But, who are you to you? 1802 01:31:51,219 --> 01:31:52,387 I mean, they all see Clark Kent 1803 01:31:52,679 --> 01:31:54,180 but... 1804 01:31:54,472 --> 01:31:55,640 I'm pretty sure there's a Kal-El 1805 01:31:55,932 --> 01:31:57,183 hiding in there somewhere. 1806 01:31:57,475 --> 01:31:58,852 [Video game sounds] 1807 01:32:00,562 --> 01:32:02,105 I'm ready to have sex with you now. 1808 01:32:02,397 --> 01:32:04,566 [Slow music playing] 1809 01:32:04,858 --> 01:32:06,776 [Sighs] 1810 01:32:07,068 --> 01:32:07,819 [Chuckles] 1811 01:32:08,111 --> 01:32:09,612 It's not so squishy this time. 1812 01:32:09,904 --> 01:32:12,282 [Chuckles] Yeah. 1813 01:32:12,574 --> 01:32:13,825 Adam? 1814 01:32:14,117 --> 01:32:15,243 Yes? 1815 01:32:15,535 --> 01:32:17,579 Adam Mitchell? 1816 01:32:17,871 --> 01:32:20,415 Uh-huh? 1817 01:32:20,707 --> 01:32:22,751 I think of you fondly. 1818 01:32:25,920 --> 01:32:27,297 I am... 1819 01:32:27,589 --> 01:32:29,257 Quite fond of you as well. 1820 01:32:29,549 --> 01:32:31,593 [Chuckles] 1821 01:32:31,885 --> 01:32:32,552 [Gasps] 1822 01:32:32,844 --> 01:32:34,679 Oh, thank you. 1823 01:32:34,971 --> 01:32:35,972 You're welcome. 1824 01:32:36,264 --> 01:32:37,098 Oh, thank you. 1825 01:32:37,390 --> 01:32:40,393 Don't mention it. 1826 01:32:40,685 --> 01:32:41,770 Okay. 1827 01:32:43,605 --> 01:32:46,691 Okay, you just... 1828 01:32:46,983 --> 01:32:48,651 You're over thinking it. [Stutters] Just do it. 1829 01:32:48,943 --> 01:32:50,111 I just don't want to hurt you. 1830 01:32:50,403 --> 01:32:51,279 You won't. 1831 01:32:51,571 --> 01:32:52,614 Stop being such a fucking pussy. 1832 01:32:52,906 --> 01:32:54,115 Look, this is new for me. 1833 01:32:54,407 --> 01:32:57,786 All right, I gotta need some positive reinforcement. 1834 01:32:58,078 --> 01:32:59,037 [Sighs] 1835 01:32:59,329 --> 01:33:00,288 Look, I'm sorry. 1836 01:33:00,580 --> 01:33:01,998 Would you please fuck my bum 1837 01:33:02,290 --> 01:33:04,209 with your beautiful, manly penis? 1838 01:33:04,501 --> 01:33:05,752 - Hmm? -Okay. 1839 01:33:06,044 --> 01:33:08,671 - Good. All right. Okay, here we go. -Okay. 1840 01:33:08,963 --> 01:33:11,091 [Huffs] 1841 01:33:11,382 --> 01:33:12,425 -[Groans] Okay. -There you go. 1842 01:33:12,717 --> 01:33:13,384 [Groans] 1843 01:33:13,676 --> 01:33:15,261 [Groans] Oh. 1844 01:33:17,847 --> 01:33:18,890 Oh. 1845 01:33:19,182 --> 01:33:21,601 -[Moans] -Oh, oh. 1846 01:33:21,893 --> 01:33:23,311 Okay. 1847 01:33:23,603 --> 01:33:25,021 Ooh. 1848 01:33:25,313 --> 01:33:27,065 -[Moaning continues] -Oh. 1849 01:33:27,357 --> 01:33:28,775 Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. 1850 01:33:29,067 --> 01:33:30,026 - Fuck! -Oh, shit! 1851 01:33:30,318 --> 01:33:31,528 - Oh, keep going, Chester. -[Mumbles] 1852 01:33:31,820 --> 01:33:33,279 - Oh, I'm going to go. -Chester, keep going. 1853 01:33:33,571 --> 01:33:34,322 - Keep going! -Oh! 1854 01:33:34,614 --> 01:33:37,283 [Both moaning] 1855 01:33:37,575 --> 01:33:38,284 Oh. 1856 01:33:38,576 --> 01:33:39,702 [Laughs] 1857 01:33:39,994 --> 01:33:41,287 - Oh. -Oh, yeah, boy. 1858 01:33:41,579 --> 01:33:43,123 - Thank you. -Over here. 1859 01:33:43,414 --> 01:33:46,501 [Groans] Fill me with baby juice. 1860 01:33:46,793 --> 01:33:47,502 - Whoo! -Do it! 1861 01:33:47,794 --> 01:33:49,546 [Moaning] 1862 01:34:02,100 --> 01:34:05,061 - Do you wanna flip around, or something? -What? 1863 01:34:05,353 --> 01:34:06,896 Sorta go where like we can't look at each other, 1864 01:34:07,188 --> 01:34:08,314 just to be fun, just to switch it up. 1865 01:34:08,606 --> 01:34:10,483 - No, no, no. This is perfect. -Okay. 1866 01:34:10,775 --> 01:34:11,442 Just like that. 1867 01:34:11,734 --> 01:34:14,445 - Yeah. -Oh, my god. 1868 01:34:14,737 --> 01:34:16,739 - Yeah. -What are you doing? 1869 01:34:17,031 --> 01:34:17,824 - Adam? -Hmm? 1870 01:34:18,116 --> 01:34:19,617 - Hey. -Hmm? 1871 01:34:19,909 --> 01:34:20,910 Look at me. 1872 01:34:21,202 --> 01:34:23,246 Everybody looks weird when they come. 1873 01:34:23,538 --> 01:34:27,375 - Just look weird with me. Okay? -Okay. 1874 01:34:28,543 --> 01:34:30,420 [Moaning] 1875 01:34:34,549 --> 01:34:35,967 " Red, red, white and blue " 1876 01:34:36,259 --> 01:34:39,012 " horses on the clouds are charging through " 1877 01:34:42,098 --> 01:34:43,850 " while their rider wears a crown " 1878 01:34:44,142 --> 01:34:47,520 " red makes water, black dries up the ground " 1879 01:34:50,315 --> 01:34:52,066 " and pale blue rider draws it so " 1880 01:34:52,358 --> 01:34:54,485 " you can't stop the coming of the lord " 1881 01:35:02,035 --> 01:35:03,870 " I wanna wait till judgment day " 1882 01:35:04,162 --> 01:35:06,998 " you stay ice and I stay up in flame " 1883 01:35:10,001 --> 01:35:11,753 " I wanna march around this town " 1884 01:35:12,045 --> 01:35:17,634 " seven times with seven trumpets sound " 1885 01:35:17,926 --> 01:35:19,636 " the final trumpet blows its horn " 1886 01:35:19,928 --> 01:35:22,305 " call the lord to come and take me home " 1887 01:35:25,975 --> 01:35:27,852 [whistling] 1888 01:35:31,814 --> 01:35:36,277 - Chester? -Yeah? 1889 01:35:36,569 --> 01:35:39,572 Please don't put your penis inside of anybody else. 1890 01:35:39,864 --> 01:35:41,199 Can we play video games now? 1891 01:35:41,491 --> 01:35:43,451 - Yeah, let's play video games now. -Okay. 1892 01:35:43,743 --> 01:35:46,329 [All groaning] 1893 01:35:48,623 --> 01:35:51,209 [Chuckles] 1894 01:35:51,501 --> 01:35:53,086 [Sighs] 1895 01:35:53,378 --> 01:35:55,463 That, um... 1896 01:35:55,755 --> 01:35:58,633 That went a lot better then in high school. 1897 01:35:58,925 --> 01:36:00,134 Yeah. 1898 01:36:02,136 --> 01:36:04,013 And nobody had to run down the street 1899 01:36:04,305 --> 01:36:05,431 without any clothes on. 1900 01:36:05,723 --> 01:36:08,142 [Chuckles] Yeah. 1901 01:36:10,270 --> 01:36:11,562 It's okay. 1902 01:36:12,939 --> 01:36:14,315 I'm over it. 1903 01:36:24,409 --> 01:36:25,660 Adam? 1904 01:36:26,828 --> 01:36:28,788 [All chattering] 1905 01:36:33,668 --> 01:36:36,838 [Cassie] Adam, everyone can see you. 1906 01:36:39,048 --> 01:36:40,383 What are you doing? 1907 01:36:40,675 --> 01:36:42,969 Something I should have done 12 years ago. 1908 01:36:43,261 --> 01:36:48,182 " If I go veil in my mind " 1909 01:36:48,474 --> 01:36:51,978 " I can turn to reality " 1910 01:36:52,270 --> 01:36:56,441 " I would leave you behind " 1911 01:36:56,733 --> 01:37:00,403 " put you far away from me " 1912 01:37:00,695 --> 01:37:04,866 " through this veil I will find " 1913 01:37:05,158 --> 01:37:09,037 " I can see my mortality " 1914 01:37:09,329 --> 01:37:12,999 " I can see it stare back at me " 1915 01:37:13,291 --> 01:37:16,794 " I can see him point and laugh at me " 1916 01:37:17,086 --> 01:37:21,090 " I've been lost all my life " 1917 01:37:21,382 --> 01:37:25,011 " now I've found what's meant for me " 1918 01:37:25,303 --> 01:37:29,349 " on the edge of the night " 1919 01:37:29,640 --> 01:37:33,561 - " is a complacency " - here we go. 1920 01:37:33,853 --> 01:37:34,854 " In the spawn " 1921 01:37:35,146 --> 01:37:37,648 - come on. -Whoo! It's so cold. 1922 01:37:37,940 --> 01:37:41,861 -" There's a moment's clarity " -fucking white people. 1923 01:37:42,153 --> 01:37:46,240 -" With a quivering frailty " -hey, you, wait up. 1924 01:37:46,532 --> 01:37:49,869 " That has all but fled from me " 1925 01:37:50,161 --> 01:37:52,789 - fuck yeah. - " Today I saw an apple in my head " 1926 01:37:53,081 --> 01:37:58,378 " and there was blood on my hands " 1927 01:37:58,669 --> 01:38:01,214 " well, everything was fire-engine red " 1928 01:38:01,506 --> 01:38:07,637 " and all the gun pigeons sang " 1929 01:38:07,929 --> 01:38:09,472 " ba ba-da ba " 1930 01:38:09,764 --> 01:38:11,682 " ba ba-da ba " 1931 01:38:11,974 --> 01:38:13,643 " ba ba-da ba " 1932 01:38:13,935 --> 01:38:18,815 " just as our point of departure " 1933 01:38:19,107 --> 01:38:22,652 " could this veil grow a wing and fly " 1934 01:38:22,944 --> 01:38:27,031 " butte truth that I harbor " 1935 01:38:27,323 --> 01:38:31,285 " has no fail to make you cry " 1936 01:38:31,577 --> 01:38:33,454 " what a shame " 1937 01:38:33,746 --> 01:38:35,915 " there is no cure " 1938 01:38:36,207 --> 01:38:39,752 " for a fear of things that die " 1939 01:38:40,044 --> 01:38:43,714 " for the need to tell a lie " 1940 01:38:44,006 --> 01:38:48,261 " for a dryness in the eye " 1941 01:38:48,553 --> 01:38:50,888 " today I saw an apple in my head " 1942 01:38:51,180 --> 01:38:54,642 " and there was blood on my hands " 1943 01:38:56,561 --> 01:38:59,105 " well, everything was fire-engine red " 1944 01:38:59,397 --> 01:39:01,899 " and all the black gods that sang " 1945 01:39:02,191 --> 01:39:03,651 [music playing] 1946 01:39:25,173 --> 01:39:26,924 " Ba ba-da ba " 1947 01:39:27,216 --> 01:39:28,968 " ba ba-da ba " 1948 01:39:29,260 --> 01:39:31,137 " ba ba-da ba " 1949 01:39:31,429 --> 01:39:33,055 " what am I for? " 1950 01:39:33,347 --> 01:39:35,057 " What am I for? " 1951 01:39:35,349 --> 01:39:36,934 " If not to lie " 1952 01:39:37,226 --> 01:39:39,312 " I'm under arms " 1953 01:39:39,604 --> 01:39:41,147 " what am I for? " 1954 01:39:41,439 --> 01:39:43,274 " What am I for? " 1955 01:39:43,566 --> 01:39:47,361 " If not to sing another song " 1956 01:39:47,653 --> 01:39:49,447 " what am I for? " 1957 01:39:49,739 --> 01:39:51,574 " What am I for? " 1958 01:39:51,866 --> 01:39:55,828 " If not to paint the walls with blood " 1959 01:39:56,120 --> 01:39:57,872 " what am I for? " 1960 01:39:58,164 --> 01:39:59,832 " What am I for? " 1961 01:40:00,124 --> 01:40:03,920 " If not to Bury in the blood " 1962 01:40:04,212 --> 01:40:05,922 " what am I for? " 1963 01:40:06,214 --> 01:40:07,965 " What am I for? " 1964 01:40:08,257 --> 01:40:12,136 " If not to build a shelter here " 1965 01:40:12,428 --> 01:40:14,138 " what am I for? " 1966 01:40:14,430 --> 01:40:16,224 " What am I for? " 1967 01:40:16,516 --> 01:40:20,436 " If not to pass another year " 1968 01:40:20,728 --> 01:40:22,438 " what am I for? " 1969 01:40:22,730 --> 01:40:24,398 " What am I for? " 1970 01:40:24,690 --> 01:40:28,402 " If not to walk us through the ride " 1971 01:40:28,694 --> 01:40:30,530 " what am I for? " 1972 01:40:30,821 --> 01:40:32,615 " What am I for? " 1973 01:40:32,907 --> 01:40:34,700 " What am I for? " 1974 01:40:34,992 --> 01:40:36,661 " Ba ba-da ba " 1975 01:40:36,953 --> 01:40:38,704 " if not to die " 1976 01:40:38,996 --> 01:40:40,748 " ba ba-da ba " 1977 01:40:41,040 --> 01:40:42,792 " ba ba-da ba " 1978 01:40:43,084 --> 01:40:44,877 " ba ba-da ba " 1979 01:40:45,169 --> 01:40:46,754 " ba ba-da ba " 1980 01:40:47,046 --> 01:40:48,714 " ba ba-da ba " 1981 01:40:49,006 --> 01:40:50,758 " ba ba-da ba " 1982 01:40:51,050 --> 01:40:53,344 " ba ba-da ba " 1983 01:40:53,636 --> 01:40:54,804 " ba ba-da ba " 1984 01:40:55,096 --> 01:40:56,681 " ba ba-da ba " 1985 01:40:56,973 --> 01:40:58,516 " ba ba-da ba " 1986 01:40:58,808 --> 01:41:00,643 [music continues]